spacedsquirrels

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the fish in an aquarium when you feed them their pellets  

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red dye no. 40 stays winning •<|:3

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can i get your enthusiastic consent to succumb to the power of my amulet

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I'm mister spine twister. I'm mister curves. I'm mister scoliosis. I'm mister Sitting Hurts

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Here are the 25 largest US cities

Of these cities:

9 have a heavy rail metro system (NYC, LA, Atlanta, DC, Philly, Miami, Boston, San Francisco, Baltimore)

11 have streetcars (Boston, Seattle, Philly, Portland, Tampa, Portland, St.Louis, Detroit, Dallas, Atlanta, DC)

13 have a light rail system (Dallas, Houston, Portland, Pheonix, Seattle, Minneapolis, San Diego, Denver, Baltimore, Charlotte, St.Louis, San Francisco, Boston)

16 have Commuter Rail (NYC, LA, Chicago, DC, Philly, Boston, Seattle, San Francisco, Minneapolis, San Diego, Denver, Baltimore, Orlando, Portland, Riverside, Dallas)

And San Antonio has no fixed guideway transit

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Being a TA for an intro proofs class is so fun because the prof told the students that they can use any reasonable symbol to end a proof after explaining QED/Tombstones are typical, and one student always does star stickers, another just says "R.I.P", another does a smiley face. I love nonstandard proof endings

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Check this Thang out, I bet you've never seen anything like it before

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*slowly reaches for the popcorn*

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Customer: JUST LAZY. MY CAT IS LAZY. DMV: CAT Verdict: ACCEPTED

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Why do leaves turn colors before they fall off the tree

The color a leaf turns is an indicator to how the leaf died:

Red- Old age

Orange- Mafia hit

Yellow- Vehicular manslaughter (non-alcohol-related)

Brown- Eaten by bugs

Tan- Syphilis

White- Consumed by fungi

Black- Burned for heresy

Crosshatched black and white- A Gorey death of ennui

Purple- Poisoned by the Queen of Thorns

Beet-Leaf Chartreuse- Said "Beet Chartreuse" three times

Clear- That was not a leaf, the tree was learning glass blowing

Green- Electrocution and/or drug overdose

Candy vermilion with gold glitter- Pride

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If you see your USA mutual looking at the news and then producing a burger from their pocket and eating it, that can mean nothing good. This is the »emergency burger« used to strengthen oneself in times of dire need, and resorting to it is an unambiguous sign of great distress

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just had a pretty bad breakdown until i accidentally clicked on a bitcoin conference video ad on twitter and got stunlocked so hard i stopped crying

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Guys I have bad news

I think I’m becoming a Radiohead fan

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Greetings Homosapians.

Is there anyone there? Is anyone left on Tumblr? Tumb er dot com. Webbed site, hashtag! I am the JOKER! I AM THE JOKER! I AM THE JOKER! Hi Ho, Kermit the Frog, here! Muppet the Hole, here! Don't be so coy. You can call me Croaker! You can call me! Don't be so coy.

Kermit. Joker. Bro Strider. Adam. Vriska. Dark Eve. Jesus is sleeping. Applejack is awake.

♤♡◇♧

DNI:

The Muppet Joker. I am scared of what I have created and will close my eyes when posting from now on so I am not harmed by my own hubris

Emos and those who indulge in the Chemical Romance. You people are sick

Minors, people over 30, and people who are 25. That is the age of arrogance

People who have a gemini moon in their astrological chart. You people are sick

People who were raised Lutheran

Twitter users

Tumblr users

Testosterone users. Just kidding love you Trans Genders OwO glomps you :3

People who identify with either binary gender. It's 2024 grow up and be Nonby (Short for Non Binary)

Those of you who do not understand the intellectual depths of Homestuck or misunderstand its themes... looking at you Karkat x John shippers

Mr. Strange. You may look at my blog but only when I am offline. If I catch you being online at the same time as me... *I evil smile and you get scared* I'LL MUPPING KICK YOUR ASS!!!!!!!!

Are you scared? Are you scared? Are you scared? Are you scared? Are you scared? Are you scared? Heh.

Run while you can.

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I made this, please feel free to use

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more cishet people should crossdress. builds a vibrant ecosystem

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Why do so many people make tiktoks while they're clearly driving. What the fuck. Stop that shit, you're gonna kill someone.