sparenickel-blog

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Everyone needs to know this, because everyone deserves to be loved.

Knowing is half the battle.

And love is a battle worth fighting for.

Something that's been on my mind a while. Initially due to Warframe, (The Great Indifference's weakness is love) but also the more I think about it, the more it makes sense to me.

To love is to know.

There are a bunch of kinds of attraction in general, platonic, familial, romantic, physical, mental, so forth, but ultimately it can all sorta be boiled down in the same way.

If you're attracted to someone, you want to know them. To love them.

Sometimes its in the method of knowing someone physically, sometimes its under the expectations of what we call romantic love. Sometimes its because someone's mind intrigues you. But, no matter the case, it still boils down to wanting to know someone.

I think this also applies to us as people, in order to love ourselves, we must know ourselves, since there's not really a difference between the two. You must be aware of, nonjudgmentally, every bit of yourself. How you think, how you act, how you react, all of it.

Loving yourself doesn't mean not wanting to change, either, because to see something as it is does not mean you can't want something more for it, but you cant know what needs to change without knowing yourself.

As Sun Tsu once said, (paraphrased) you must know your enemy to defeat them consistently.

As is attributed to biblical Jesus, you must love your enemy.

I think they're the same thing, especially when your greatest enemy is yourself.

Additionally, I think its important to understand what knowing/loving someone else looks like, because I think kindness counts. In order to truly be kind to someone, you must know what they lack or need, and be willing to help. You have to love people to be good to them.

In a relationship, love might look like being aware of places your partner struggles or things they may desire, and giving assistance. This cannot happen if you do not know them. Love may also look like being aware of how they feel about certain ways you behave, and being willing to modulate to make sure they know you love them.

Love may also look like not expecting certain behaviors of other people. Quid-pro-quo relationships struggle to seem like love to me if one side does an act that looks like love with the expectation that the other will perform an act, regardless of their own feelings. No effort was really made to know the other side.

In self love, love might look like feeling emotions, and taking the time to understand why they're being felt, and why you respond the way you do. That's what therapy is for, ultimately, understanding the 'why' and what to do about it. You cannot consistently defeat an enemy you don't know, and you can't permanently change things you do not understand.

Self love may also look like being aware when someone isn't giving you the same love that you give them, and being willing to make your own pain known. You give them the opportunity to love you in return, to know you, and if they do not take it, then maybe they don't actually love you. Else they'd care enough to know you. (Be sure that when you do this, it's clear, though.) Maybe you need to step away from that relationship, because you do deserve to be loved and known.

We are not made to go at life alone. We're social creatures, and nothing in human history worth doing has ever been done by only one person. Loving lets us build communities, and its the support of those communities that allow beautiful things to happen.

When one says "I love you", I think it means "you're worth knowing, to me."

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Imagine, though.

You're sitting in DE's backrooms with the writing team and they help catch you up to speed. You know a lot of the stuff they're telling you already from theory-crafting, in-game descriptions, items and their placements, voicelines, game mechanics, easter eggs, etc.

They pitch ideas back and forth about possible connections and plot points that need clarification and you readily hand them the info they need because you've ingested SO much information that was put into the game by multiple, separate people that it's made you into the go-to lore person whenever someone has a question.

Everything is going well.

They just told you everything lore-wise and canon in the game. It's mind-blowing. It's life-changing.

And then you realize.

You can tell no one.

*runs away and around a corner while laughing maniacally*

On one hand I would love to work for DE's writing team, on the other, if I had an interview and they said something like "do you have any questions" and they accepted lore questions the interview length would be extended by 20 hours. I'd be vibrating like an electron

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Anime Drifter! Their wittle terrified faces! Oh my sweet lawd!

which is worse: drifter having to tell minerva and velimir that what may or may not be their baby girl neci has overthrown the child king of their personal-trauma-paradise-turned-torture-dimension and has just fucked the whole thing sideways or drifter having to catch the people of duviri up to speed on who exactly this robot-armed military dominatrix that might not even be the robot-armed military dominatrix is and why (and how) she's even there in the first place

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You're gonna make me wax some kind of weird poetic about one of my favorite streamers and I'm SO glad to hear that you like him too, you have no idea.

So many words and phrases I can only hear in his voice. "Pathetic." "Get mom! It's BAD!" "No shot!" and so many more, along with the infamous "Owie!"

The man knows what he's about and isn't afraid to fumble for a bit. He will build himself up like no one can touch him, provide evidence to his supposed higher station and get up in your face with fervent intensity to paint a picture of himself being oh-so holier than thou, then whimper and cry when he trips and comically slams his face into the ground. It's endlessly entertaining.

He also plays with Dave a lot, who is incredibly unhinged. The guy lives his life like he's frolicking through a minefield and Tomato just has to sit there and watch in utter bewilderment as his sanity (both of their sanity?) teeters on the brink of madness.

Living for the chaos. What a champ.

He rolled a nat 20 on charisma in life and fights every day to maintain it.

I need to go watch his SS13 vids again…

Watching Tomato Gaming has permanently changed my vernacular for the worse and I'm honestly fine with that. Whimsy my beloved

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What if Duviri spirals consisted of more than one emotion?

I know it's probably never going to happen, but imagine if DE made Duviri spirals like how Inside Out made memories with multiple emotions. I'm talking:

"Life sucks, then you die" will kill you for trying to get close and still attend your funeral Luscinia (Fear/Sorrow)

#yoda "Fear leads to anger" and everything in between Sythel (Anger/Fear)

Pretending everything is okay because he deserves to be happy Bombastine (Joy/Envy)

Always-on-the-brink-of-tears-but-never-quite-getting-there-because-she-doesn't-want-to-let-the-dark-thoughts-win Mathila (Sorrow/Joy)

SASSY LODUN (Envy/Anger)

'nuff said

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My Warframe art submission for the #Tennocon2025

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Operation: Eight Claw

Rally your allies for a brand-new Clan Event starting June 25!

The time to unleash your Clan’s full strength is nearly upon us, as Operation Eight Claw launches on June 25 at 11:30 a.m. ET!

Cut down legions of Murmur tearing through the perilous isles of Duviri to earn extravagant Rewards like the evolving Invictus Signa, Thalys Incarnon Scythe, goodies from previous Operations and more!

Like rewards from past events, the Invictus Signa is an evolving customization: players will unlock three distinct variants as they progress through the event, each with its own striking visual flair. Inspired by the enigmatic aesthetic of the Murmur, the design of each Invictus Signa variant radiates an aura of solemn power.

The Thalys Incarnon Scythe wields a lethality as refined as it is absolute: its curved blade dances between beauty and brutality, each motion leaving trails of spectral voidlight like a duelist’s final flourish.

Stay tuned for more in-depth information on Operation: Eight Claw on June 25 alongside Isleweaver’s release!

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This goes hard

With the Isleweaver update approaching, many things have to come to me. One was this, which I know we probably can't wyrm out on the major (unless?) but I really liked the idea so. Thankfully I made a wyrm Tsun design here. Can't wait to go fight a woman in a couple weeks.

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Do you have a tutorial on how to draw Arthur Nightingale's hair? I'm having a mental crisis with his hair, it's just not hairing. 😭

I'm a terrible teacher because most things come naturally to me from looking at them after years of drawing 😭 but maybe doing bit of math and geometry to understand what's going on rather than just see it can help?

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Happy pride month specifically to folks on the asexual and aromantic spectrum who oftentimes feel isolated and left out of the conversation. You belong here as much as the rest of us and I hope that you are all loved in a way that is comforting to you.

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Symbolism and story-telling go hand in hand, am I right?

Guys?

is it just me or do I feel like there's a connection between Rusalka losing her arm and her prosthetic just so happens to be elongated like an orokin's arm? much like Thrax has? and we conveniently don't know how she lost it in the first place yet

I dunno if I'm reading too much into it but now that she's in duviri where the residents either have a long right arm or a missing right arm I feel like there's no coincidence there

there's also Drifter's right arm being mangled/modified by the Lotus, making them a chimera so I'm still waiting on the consequences of that. if there weren't gonna be any why change it from the hand latching onto the Drifter's wrist?

why is it always the right hand hmm

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Do you have a tutorial on how to draw Arthur Nightingale's hair? I'm having a mental crisis with his hair, it's just not hairing. 😭

I'm a terrible teacher because most things come naturally to me from looking at them after years of drawing 😭 but maybe doing bit of math and geometry to understand what's going on rather than just see it can help?

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This is a gentle reminder that your itchy, watery eyes that have been bothering you in just the corners might not be dry, but may have a tiny, nearly invisible eyelash curling the wrong way that is stabbing your delicate inner lids and needs tending to. Hope it helps!

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medically accurate muscle chart:

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"whatever the fuck Tyl Regor has going on with your Warframe"

Okay the other stuff is incredibly obvious but ^THIS^ is absolutely hilarious!

That voice actor had to have known what they were doing.

There was no way they weren't *very excited* when they dished out those disturbingly lascivious voice lines.

"Warframe has gone woke with this pride stuff!!1!"

Meanwhile Warframe has

-two old gay guys who love each other

-a group of traumatized pansexuals that you can romance

-a genderfluid Warframe

-a non-binary Warframe

-a polyamoures Warframe

-whatever the fuck Lizzie and Flare have going on with each other

whatever the fuck Tyl Regor has going on with your Warframe

Warframe has always been like this!

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Helpful writing tips in subtlety.

Don't forget to put some really subtle stuff into your writing!

A character doesn't like your main character so they don't use preferred names? Build it up! Slowly but surely, they start to like them and use the preferred name more often over time.

More characters don't like your main character for no discernable reason? No one has to know right away! Just make them embittered in small ways that aren't immediately obvious until it finally comes up and can't be ignored later on.

Going from the perspective of multiple characters? Use wording and speech mannerisms like they would. Add in phrasing and formalities that are unique to that character's dialogue and/or background. Anyway/anyways, toward/towards, anyone/anybody, something/somethin', everyone/y'all, he drank heavily/he slammed it back, stuff like that.

Is your character upset? Happy? Scared? It doesn't just have to be describing them. Add in some scenery to really build on that feeling. "Not even the heat from the raging fire before him held a candle to his anger.", "The sun had never been so vibrant on her smiling face", and "Every corner threatened to swallow them up with their overreaching shadows." respectively.

Does someone have a overarching fear/hatred of something? Maybe they're reminded of it in a little bit of everything. A smell, a color, a shape, a shadow, a phrase, an attitude, a look on someone's face, a place, etc. and it effects their mood/attitude in some way.

Nobody's perfect! Make some small accident that comes back to bite someone in the backside or helps them get in contact with something helpful later on.

This has been some helpful tips from a random stranger on the internet!

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I just want to hear the clippity clops of their hoovsies on the stone streets. What a delightful sound that would make.

DE let me use horse in Hollvania