spencestiel-michelle - Tumblr blog

[spencestiel-michelle]

Reid: seriously, Y/n, i don’t want you to be the one going in there undercover. 

Y/n: i’m sorry. do you want to put on the dress instead and go in there yourself?

[spencestiel-michelle]

if y’all like this… i can do more. not much more bc i second guess everything i write but definitely a bit more.

*the BAU team noticing Y/n and Spencer Reid*

Emily: hey- Derek. look at how close they’re standing. 

Garcia: they’re practically breathing the same oxygen. 

Derek scoffs: that kid’s got nerve. yesterday he literally took a whole step away from me when I stood too close to him- went on about something like germs in the air or whatever. 

Garcia: yeah, well, my love, you are not Y/n. 

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*the BAU team noticing Y/n and Spencer Reid*

Emily: hey- Derek. look at how close they’re standing. 

Garcia: they’re practically breathing the same oxygen. 

Derek scoffs: that kid’s got nerve. yesterday he literally took a whole step away from me when I stood too close to him- went on about something like germs in the air or whatever. 

Garcia: yeah, well, my love, you are not Y/n. 

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Reid: Morgan spent the weekend at my apartment while his place got fumigated. 

Reid: i now know what people mean when they say their ‘patience is being tested.’

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is there room for one more?

yall is just me or does david rossi lowkey have the same vibe as manny from ice age?

do they look alike? is it the hair swoop? idk but it’s SOMETHING

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Reid: in my mind, candy never expires. 

Rossi: oh, the hospital must love you. 

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Emily: you should try drinking water once in a while. 

Reid: what’s water? 

Emily: what’s water? 

Reid: water. wauh-tur. water. it sounds like a foreign item that is no interest to my taste buds. 

Emily: you’re annoying. 

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JJ: when did you fall? are-

Emily: the day i met you. just head over heels for you the moment you… that’s not what you’re talking about, is it?

JJ: um… no, Derek said you fell in the parking lot. i was going to ask if you were okay… 

Emily: oh. yeah. yeah, yeah, i’m fine. i’m fine… barely hurt.

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*in round table room*

Garcia: look! i put a white erase board up!

*Emily picks up pink marker and proceeds to draw a penis* 

Garcia: oh. okay- no. *takes marker away and furiously erases it* bad- good form- but bad. 

Garcia: age appropriate things only. *hands marker back* honey, try a labradoodle. 

*Derek walks into round table room*

Derek: oh! *takes maker out of Emily’s hand and proceeds to draw penis* 

*Garcia bristly removes white board and leaves the room* 

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Derek: uhh, kid? any chance there’s a rest station within the next mile of here so we’re not stuck in the middle of nowhere with an empty tank and a sadistic murderer on the loose with a tendency to kill in isolated places like this?

Reid: actually the gas tank isn’t empty, that light means the car’s engine failed. and based on the weather change and how long we’ve been driving, i’d say we’re… 16 miles away from an operating civilization. 

Derek: okay, how is that any better? 

Reid: it’s not. i just like to be accurate. 

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Emily: piss me off once, shame on you.

Emily: piss me off twice, shame on me.

Emily: piss me off three times- you’ll wish you hadn’t. 

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Derek: so you don’t trust a lot of people, huh? 

Reid: no, i trust everyone. that’s what gave me the trust issues. 

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Emily: kiss me

JJ: what? 

Emily: kill me. i said kill me.

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Derek: do they make transparent coffins? 

Emily: 

Derek: i want you to have a clear coffin when you die. 

Emily:

Derek: just for certainty.

Emily: 

Derek: cool. glad we agree. 

Emily:

Emily:

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Reid: can we all just collectively agree to skip Valentine’s Day? 

Rossi: don’t ask me. 

Derek: we’re all bad at expressing our feelings, so, yeah, why not? 

Emily: if we did our jobs like we communicate our care for each other we would be fired and dead. 

Hotch: can you put that in writing for me? 

JJ: Valentine’s Day is a scam anyways. don’t get me started. it’s cute but… eh. 

*Penelope slowly backs away with arms full of Valentine’s Day cards, goodies, and flowers*

[spencestiel-michelle]

Hotch: how’s the team building exercise going? 

Rossi: i want to be perfectly clear: i had nothing to do with this. 

*Hotch looks to the team in a cheer pyramid* 

Emily, kneeling in human pyramid: rossi is making a terrible spotter, Hotch. he looked away from our building FOUR times. 

Reid, wobbling at top of human pyramid: i would like to propose that JJ takes my spot as flyer, i don’t like the look in Derek’s eyes. 

Derek, feet firmly planted on the ground: my job is back spot, man! i help airlift you into the air- *claps hands, his smile grows* now fall back already! 

JJ, perfectly fine: besides, Spence, we both know i’m stronger than you to hold the team as the base. 

Garcia: JJ’s right. but i want to know is why i am also on the bottom?? i can’t rally you guys from down here. Emily: Garcia, you are a part of this team. haha, see what i did there? a part? a part of the building?

Hotch: this is not what i meant by team building. 

Hotch: however, this is strangely impressive.