stagesofkiller
stagesofkiller
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stagesofkiller · 9 days ago
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I think another reason killer may avoid and be wary of things such as sex—or any type of physical intimacy and affection, outside of his own general lack of sexual attraction and low libido—would be the worry that his body would not be able to tell the difference between fighting, killing, and sex and closeness.
Especially if penetration is involved. Being penetrated makes him feel weak, like prey—reminds the body of Nightmare shoving through him, squashing the SOUL into obedience and submission. Reminds the body of knives, of spears, of being stabbed, attacked, overpowered, killed.
Highly likely to trigger distress, flashbacks, dissociation—trigger his SOUL automatically into Stage 2. His body could lean hard into certain responses—either having learned to tense and go still, or violently lash out before he can consciously decide to do that. The body and magic can have reactions before he’s aware of it happening—convulsing, tensing, summoning the knives and bones, reaching for a throat.
Doing the penetrating is a little better—makes him feel in more control, like he has more power, added bonus of doing the acts of service to make someone feel good—but it’s still rife with programming triggers, Stage 2 triggers—but in the opposite direction of if he was being penetrated.
His mind and body may misread and misinterpret his partner, the body below him, as prey, as target, as potential to be a threat. The movements, the smells, the sounds, the look on their face.
This position makes him feel more secure sure, but it also widely swings his mindset into that of a killer’s. A weapon’s. A perpetrator’s.
A monster’s.
Movements can be misinterpreted as killing, as stabbing—anything that is interpreted as fear, or weakness, or escape can trigger instincts to subdue, capture.
Overpower.
So even if Killer consents while in Stage 1, even if he’s wanting, the second something triggers him into Stage 2’s mindset—a state where his consent is compromised—and he comes back to himself, he may react either disoriented, confused—or as if he had just killed someone.
It’s not something he really consciously decides to do—he’s in a body that has instincts that Killer doesn’t fully understand or control. It truly feels like it doesn’t belong to him anymore.
When he’s in Stage 2, this may be something he’s somewhat aware of— maybe not what exactly triggers what, because Stage 2 is a dissociative state and dissociating from the body is how Killer was ever able to survive let alone maintain some sanity, but aware that sometimes that body moves without him—but Killer may be prone to resignation of this fact. He may just be more prone to leaning into it, or finding a way to manipulate it to his advantage.
When he’s in Stage 1, however, he’s too aware of the body. Of what happens when he’s not present in it. He’s too aware that even mishearing a certain noise as something else—a moan as pain, a gasp confused for someone choking on their own blood, that sounds of someone’s last breaths—can trigger that a I’m killing them thought, can trigger his body and SOUL to act as they’ve been taught. Regardless of if he wants it or not. It doesn’t think or want, it just acts and reacts.
This is likely to plague every moment of his life—not just sex, but cuddling, hugs, things like that. Especially if they feel trapping, restraining, or overpowering. Especially if it takes him by surprise—such as hugs from behind.
This is in large part why Killer, once he’s in Stage 1, warns others—especially Color—not to trust him when he’s like that.
Especially because this awareness about it becomes compromised in higher Stages—he thinks he’s just standing there, but Color would notice the hands curling into claws, too blank stare trailing weak points like the jugular, how the body blocks the exits of every room so no one can escape.
In contrast, however, Color would have to be hyperaware of Killer’s body—its tells, its body language. Color cannot afford to not be aware of it—not when it puts his, Killer’s, and everyone else’s safety on the line. He has to take Killer’s warnings seriously—don’t trust him when he’s like that.
(For example, how Color was able to move fast enough to stop Killer from stabbing Abyss.)
So not only is Killer likely to question and doubt if he’s capable of feeling love—of any kind—anymore when he’s in Stage 2, but he’s also likely to question and doubt if the body he’s in even knows how to receive love.
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stagesofkiller · 10 days ago
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the whole idea of nightmare capturing color, killer convincing him that color can be useful enough to keep, has potential for dead dove do not eat and whump scenarios fr
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stagesofkiller · 10 days ago
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I think another reason killer may avoid and be wary of things such as sex—or any type of physical intimacy and affection, outside of his own general lack of sexual attraction and low libido—would be the worry that his body would not be able to tell the difference between fighting, killing, and sex and closeness.
Especially if penetration is involved. Being penetrated makes him feel weak, like prey—reminds the body of Nightmare shoving through him, squashing the SOUL into obedience and submission. Reminds the body of knives, of spears, of being stabbed, attacked, overpowered, killed.
Highly likely to trigger distress, flashbacks, dissociation—trigger his SOUL automatically into Stage 2. His body could lean hard into certain responses—either having learned to tense and go still, or violently lash out before he can consciously decide to do that. The body and magic can have reactions before he’s aware of it happening—convulsing, tensing, summoning the knives and bones, reaching for a throat.
Doing the penetrating is a little better—makes him feel in more control, like he has more power, added bonus of doing the acts of service to make someone feel good—but it’s still rife with programming triggers, Stage 2 triggers—but in the opposite direction of if he was being penetrated.
His mind and body may misread and misinterpret his partner, the body below him, as prey, as target, as potential to be a threat. The movements, the smells, the sounds, the look on their face.
This position makes him feel more secure sure, but it also widely swings his mindset into that of a killer’s. A weapon’s. A perpetrator’s.
A monster’s.
Movements can be misinterpreted as killing, as stabbing—anything that is interpreted as fear, or weakness, or escape can trigger instincts to subdue, capture.
Overpower.
So even if Killer consents while in Stage 1, even if he’s wanting, the second something triggers him into Stage 2’s mindset—a state where his consent is compromised—and he comes back to himself, he may react either disoriented, confused—or as if he had just killed someone.
It’s not something he really consciously decides to do—he’s in a body that has instincts that Killer doesn’t fully understand or control. It truly feels like it doesn’t belong to him anymore.
When he’s in Stage 2, this may be something he’s somewhat aware of— maybe not what exactly triggers what, because Stage 2 is a dissociative state and dissociating from the body is how Killer was ever able to survive let alone maintain some sanity, but aware that sometimes that body moves without him—but Killer may be prone to resignation of this fact. He may just be more prone to leaning into it, or finding a way to manipulate it to his advantage.
When he’s in Stage 1, however, he’s too aware of the body. Of what happens when he’s not present in it. He’s too aware that even mishearing a certain noise as something else—a moan as pain, a gasp confused for someone choking on their own blood, that sounds of someone’s last breaths—can trigger that a I’m killing them thought, can trigger his body and SOUL to act as they’ve been taught. Regardless of if he wants it or not. It doesn’t think or want, it just acts and reacts.
This is likely to plague every moment of his life—not just sex, but cuddling, hugs, things like that. Especially if they feel trapping, restraining, or overpowering. Especially if it takes him by surprise—such as hugs from behind.
This is in large part why Killer, once he’s in Stage 1, warns others—especially Color—not to trust him when he’s like that.
Especially because this awareness about it becomes compromised in higher Stages—he thinks he’s just standing there, but Color would notice the hands curling into claws, too blank stare trailing weak points like the jugular, how the body blocks the exits of every room so no one can escape.
In contrast, however, Color would have to be hyperaware of Killer’s body—its tells, its body language. Color cannot afford to not be aware of it—not when it puts his, Killer’s, and everyone else’s safety on the line. He has to take Killer’s warnings seriously—don’t trust him when he’s like that.
(For example, how Color was able to move fast enough to stop Killer from stabbing Abyss.)
So not only is Killer likely to question and doubt if he’s capable of feeling love—of any kind—anymore when he’s in Stage 2, but he’s also likely to question and doubt if the body he’s in even knows how to receive love.
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stagesofkiller · 11 days ago
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I think another reason killer may avoid and be wary of things such as sex—or any type of physical intimacy and affection, outside of his own general lack of sexual attraction and low libido—would be the worry that his body would not be able to tell the difference between fighting, killing, and sex and closeness.
Especially if penetration is involved. Being penetrated makes him feel weak, like prey—reminds the body of Nightmare shoving through him, squashing the SOUL into obedience and submission. Reminds the body of knives, of spears, of being stabbed, attacked, overpowered, killed.
Highly likely to trigger distress, flashbacks, dissociation—trigger his SOUL automatically into Stage 2. His body could lean hard into certain responses—either having learned to tense and go still, or violently lash out before he can consciously decide to do that. The body and magic can have reactions before he’s aware of it happening—convulsing, tensing, summoning the knives and bones, reaching for a throat.
Doing the penetrating is a little better—makes him feel in more control, like he has more power, added bonus of doing the acts of service to make someone feel good—but it’s still rife with programming triggers, Stage 2 triggers—but in the opposite direction of if he was being penetrated.
His mind and body may misread and misinterpret his partner, the body below him, as prey, as target, as potential to be a threat. The movements, the smells, the sounds, the look on their face.
This position makes him feel more secure sure, but it also widely swings his mindset into that of a killer’s. A weapon’s. A perpetrator’s.
A monster’s.
Movements can be misinterpreted as killing, as stabbing—anything that is interpreted as fear, or weakness, or escape can trigger instincts to subdue, capture.
Overpower.
So even if Killer consents while in Stage 1, even if he’s wanting, the second something triggers him into Stage 2’s mindset—a state where his consent is compromised—and he comes back to himself, he may react either disoriented, confused—or as if he had just killed someone.
It’s not something he really consciously decides to do—he’s in a body that has instincts that Killer doesn’t fully understand or control. It truly feels like it doesn’t belong to him anymore.
When he’s in Stage 2, this may be something he’s somewhat aware of— maybe not what exactly triggers what, because Stage 2 is a dissociative state and dissociating from the body is how Killer was ever able to survive let alone maintain some sanity, but aware that sometimes that body moves without him—but Killer may be prone to resignation of this fact. He may just be more prone to leaning into it, or finding a way to manipulate it to his advantage.
When he’s in Stage 1, however, he’s too aware of the body. Of what happens when he’s not present in it. He’s too aware that even mishearing a certain noise as something else—a moan as pain, a gasp confused for someone choking on their own blood, that sounds of someone’s last breaths—can trigger that a I’m killing them thought, can trigger his body and SOUL to act as they’ve been taught. Regardless of if he wants it or not. It doesn’t think or want, it just acts and reacts.
This is likely to plague every moment of his life—not just sex, but cuddling, hugs, things like that. Especially if they feel trapping, restraining, or overpowering. Especially if it takes him by surprise—such as hugs from behind.
This is in large part why Killer, once he’s in Stage 1, warns others—especially Color—not to trust him when he’s like that.
Especially because this awareness about it becomes compromised in higher Stages—he thinks he’s just standing there, but Color would notice the hands curling into claws, too blank stare trailing weak points like the jugular, how the body blocks the exits of every room so no one can escape.
In contrast, however, Color would have to be hyperaware of Killer’s body—its tells, its body language. Color cannot afford to not be aware of it—not when it puts his, Killer’s, and everyone else’s safety on the line. He has to take Killer’s warnings seriously—don’t trust him when he’s like that.
(For example, how Color was able to move fast enough to stop Killer from stabbing Abyss.)
So not only is Killer likely to question and doubt if he’s capable of feeling love—of any kind—anymore when he’s in Stage 2, but he’s also likely to question and doubt if the body he’s in even knows how to receive love.
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stagesofkiller · 11 days ago
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had a bad day so here’s some ptsd whump prompts to cope <3
Flashbacks that are stirred by seemingly mundane things. The taste of whumpee’s food, the way something smells, just a simple, everyday word. Anything can be a trigger, and I mean anything
whumpee that doesn’t feel real, and hasn’t felt real since the event
Moreover, a whumpee who feels like their trauma happened to someone else because they’ve distanced themselves from it too much
gimmie whumpees who don’t realize they’re traumatized. Give me whumpees who spend months living in agony unable to accept that what they went through was traumatic, either because they’ve distanced themselves don’t think it counts as “valid” trauma (no such thing), or simply can’t even fathom themselves as quote unquote “broken”
and That realization can feel both freeing and terrible. Whumpee thinks that they’re broken, that they’ve been ruined forever. And sometimes, it’s hard to come to terms with it
and if you really want them suffering: have them do all of this alone, with no one there to ground them
or give them a service animal to help with severe panic attacks if you wanna go the wholesome route. Idk it’s your choice man
Anyways, remember to drink some water today! More for you, less for your whumpees
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stagesofkiller · 11 days ago
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Another friendly reminder, you can very easily grab whumpees chin if they’re tied up. You can wrench their head to face you, controllingly keep them in place, really just invade their space.
You can also boop their nose with the tip of a knife or other weapon, for some extra fun
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stagesofkiller · 11 days ago
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my favorite whump trope, is whumper being kind to whumpee while torturing them.
they brush their hair, make them food after long hours of torture. they whisper sweet nothings, as they put bandages on their wounds, that they caused.
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stagesofkiller · 11 days ago
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"You have zero sense of self-preservation, do you?"
--stoic to defiant
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stagesofkiller · 11 days ago
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“Is there anything left of the old you?”
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stagesofkiller · 11 days ago
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“They did that to you? And you let them?”
“You think I had a say in how I was fucking tortured?”
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stagesofkiller · 11 days ago
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Thoughts on noncon kissing
-jaw grabbing
-alternatively, throat grabbing
-making whumpee initiate it
-switching between two whumpers, giving whumpee no break
-whumper tastes like cigarettes/alcohol/etc
-shotgunning
-hurting whumpee until they open their mouth in pain to kiss them
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stagesofkiller · 12 days ago
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I think another reason killer may avoid and be wary of things such as sex—or any type of physical intimacy and affection, outside of his own general lack of sexual attraction and low libido—would be the worry that his body would not be able to tell the difference between fighting, killing, and sex and closeness.
Especially if penetration is involved. Being penetrated makes him feel weak, like prey—reminds the body of Nightmare shoving through him, squashing the SOUL into obedience and submission. Reminds the body of knives, of spears, of being stabbed, attacked, overpowered, killed.
Highly likely to trigger distress, flashbacks, dissociation—trigger his SOUL automatically into Stage 2. His body could lean hard into certain responses—either having learned to tense and go still, or violently lash out before he can consciously decide to do that. The body and magic can have reactions before he’s aware of it happening—convulsing, tensing, summoning the knives and bones, reaching for a throat.
Doing the penetrating is a little better—makes him feel in more control, like he has more power, added bonus of doing the acts of service to make someone feel good—but it’s still rife with programming triggers, Stage 2 triggers—but in the opposite direction of if he was being penetrated.
His mind and body may misread and misinterpret his partner, the body below him, as prey, as target, as potential to be a threat. The movements, the smells, the sounds, the look on their face.
This position makes him feel more secure sure, but it also widely swings his mindset into that of a killer’s. A weapon’s. A perpetrator’s.
A monster’s.
Movements can be misinterpreted as killing, as stabbing—anything that is interpreted as fear, or weakness, or escape can trigger instincts to subdue, capture.
Overpower.
So even if Killer consents while in Stage 1, even if he’s wanting, the second something triggers him into Stage 2’s mindset—a state where his consent is compromised—and he comes back to himself, he may react either disoriented, confused—or as if he had just killed someone.
It’s not something he really consciously decides to do—he’s in a body that has instincts that Killer doesn’t fully understand or control. It truly feels like it doesn’t belong to him anymore.
When he’s in Stage 2, this may be something he’s somewhat aware of— maybe not what exactly triggers what, because Stage 2 is a dissociative state and dissociating from the body is how Killer was ever able to survive let alone maintain some sanity, but aware that sometimes that body moves without him—but Killer may be prone to resignation of this fact. He may just be more prone to leaning into it, or finding a way to manipulate it to his advantage.
When he’s in Stage 1, however, he’s too aware of the body. Of what happens when he’s not present in it. He’s too aware that even mishearing a certain noise as something else—a moan as pain, a gasp confused for someone choking on their own blood, that sounds of someone’s last breaths—can trigger that a I’m killing them thought, can trigger his body and SOUL to act as they’ve been taught. Regardless of if he wants it or not. It doesn’t think or want, it just acts and reacts.
This is likely to plague every moment of his life—not just sex, but cuddling, hugs, things like that. Especially if they feel trapping, restraining, or overpowering. Especially if it takes him by surprise—such as hugs from behind.
This is in large part why Killer, once he’s in Stage 1, warns others—especially Color—not to trust him when he’s like that.
Especially because this awareness about it becomes compromised in higher Stages—he thinks he’s just standing there, but Color would notice the hands curling into claws, too blank stare trailing weak points like the jugular, how the body blocks the exits of every room so no one can escape.
In contrast, however, Color would have to be hyperaware of Killer’s body—its tells, its body language. Color cannot afford to not be aware of it—not when it puts his, Killer’s, and everyone else’s safety on the line. He has to take Killer’s warnings seriously—don’t trust him when he’s like that.
(For example, how Color was able to move fast enough to stop Killer from stabbing Abyss.)
So not only is Killer likely to question and doubt if he’s capable of feeling love—of any kind—anymore when he’s in Stage 2, but he’s also likely to question and doubt if the body he’s in even knows how to receive love.
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stagesofkiller · 21 days ago
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wouldn’t be surprised if color has a tendency to get feral about killers smell, probably inhales that shit like a dog. And his eyes, the color, the empty black. particularly when he’s in stage 2. makes color forget where he is. quiets out all the noise.
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stagesofkiller · 22 days ago
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wouldn’t be surprised if color has a tendency to get feral about killers smell, probably inhales that shit like a dog. And his eyes, the color, the empty black. particularly when he’s in stage 2. makes color forget where he is. quiets out all the noise.
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stagesofkiller · 22 days ago
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I think Cross craves the approval that XGaster never gave him, but the way the fandom sexualizes that aspect is a little off-putting in my opinion.
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stagesofkiller · 26 days ago
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how does one participate in somno consensually? I’ve been daydreaming about it for ages but I know it’s a grey area. I want to consent beforehand but I don’t know if that counts because I can’t revoke consent during the act yk
Good question! This can differ depending on your partner, like any other kink but here are some tips and resources.
If you're talking about participating in somnophilia (outside of roleplaying!), that's a type of consensual non-consent (CNC), so you should start learning about that first! Articles, videos, books, whatever suits you best.
(Here, here, and here are some good articles on it!)
It can make consent seem murky but part of CNC (and/or rape play) is playing with all the different angles to consent.
With somnophilia, part of it is being aware that you have the choice of roleplay (where you pretend to be asleep and have partner(s) involved!) and you have the choice of actually being asleep! You're correct that you can't revoke your consent during the act if you're actually asleep, though you can wake up during the act (you can even plan for that with your partner(s)!).
But you can still consent beforehand! It's called "Informed Consent", which is used in situations where you know your consent might/will be impaired but you still want to do the thing anyway, so you learn all the benefits/risks and decide whether and how you want it to happen beforehand. (Its often used to consent to things like surgeries but also intoxication play and other types of sex.)
Just be very sure to vet your partner(s) beforehand and figure out both what you want to do and what your partner wants to do and both of your limits beforehand! Communicate, be aware of your limits and try to do it with partners you trust.
Hope this helps, Anon! Let me know if you have anymore questions. <3
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stagesofkiller · 2 months ago
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i need to be jailed for 1000 years
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