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tchaikowsky donating his skull to the royal shakespeare company in the hopes of becoming yorick is the most dramatic ass dark academia shit ever and you can’t convince me otherwise 

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You ever think supernatural creatures that consider humans potential prey have that "cat chases a bear up a tree"-thing? Like how bears, being an apex predator, have no concept of something that's sufficiently prey-sized deciding to attack instead of fleeing, and cats have no awareness of the fact that they can die. So every once in a while a cat and a bear come face to face in the wild for the first time. A bear doesn't understand what this creature is that isn't trying to flee, and starts sniffing. A cat doesn't understand what this creature is and decides to slap it. Utterly baffled, the bear decides it's best to get out of here. The cat starts chasing because obviously anything that flees is prey.

Imagine having an Entity in your home that eats creatures like you, but has never caught a human before. It doesn't understand why this prey isn't trying to escape, the human is clearly unnerved by sensing A Presence but still keeps stubbornly sitting on the couch watching TV. The Entity moves a piece of furniture, making an eerie creaking noise, planning to raise terror in its prey as a way of playing with its food. But instead of even turning to look towards the source of the sound, the human just yells into the empty house:

"WHATEVER THE FUCK JUST MADE THAT NOISE HAD BETTER FUCK OFF, OR START PAYING RENT."

The Entiry freezes in place, and decides that whatever is going on, it's not worth the risk to find out. Better leave while it still can.

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Want to learn something new in 2022??

Absolute beginner adult ballet series (fabulous beginning teacher)

40 piano lessons for beginners (some of the best explanations for piano I’ve ever seen)

Excellent basic crochet video series

Basic knitting (probably the best how to knit video out there)

Pre-Free Figure Skate Levels A-D guides and practice activities (each video builds up with exercises to the actual moves!)

How to draw character faces video (very funny, surprisingly instructive?)

Another drawing character faces video

Literally my favorite art pose hack

Tutorial of how to make a whole ass Stardew Valley esque farming game in Gamemaker Studios 2??

Introduction to flying small aircrafts

French/Dutch/Fishtail braiding

Playing the guitar for beginners (well paced and excellent instructor)

Playing the violin for beginners (really good practical tips mixed in)

Color theory in digital art (not of the children’s hospital variety)

Retake classes you hated but now there’s zero stakes:

Calculus 1 (full semester class)

Learn basic statistics (free textbook)

Introduction to college physics (free textbook)

Introduction to accounting (free textbook)

Learn a language:

Ancient Greek

Latin

Spanish

German

Japanese (grammar guide) (for dummies)

French

Russian (pretty good cyrillic guide!)

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Jason as those AO3 authors who have the worst tragedies happening to them and yet still continues to pump out his new chapter every week

Some poor, unbeknownst Gothamite: “My favorite fanfic writer hasn’t posted or updated any of their fanfic in like four years. I don’t want to bug them but I’m always hoping for them to come back. I hope their okay :( ”

Jason, in between cutting off right hand mens heads and antagonize black mask, like Really Living It Up: “hey, sorry, guys! I know it’s been forever! I literally died and clawed my way back from zombiehood, but I’m back now! Hope you enjoy this new chapter!”

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I just saw a fanfic author on tiktok advertising their fic like booktok does and peace and love but friend. your real life actual face??? associated with your fic???

listen, as far as y'all are concerned, I am a sentient seal with access to a keyboard, and we’re leaving it at that

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Carla Gugino as Verna

THE FALL OF THE HOUSE OF USHER (2023)

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The Fall of the House of Usher is many things and I'm making a conscious choice to not scream about every single one of them rn, but what left me staring at a wall in tears is just... kindness. Death was kind. She gave every choice, every reason to stop. She would take these kids anyway but she also regretted having to take them like that. She cared when nobody else would, even though they kept making the wrong choices.

She's never cruel for cruelty's sake. She wasn't cruel to Lenore. She just sent a child to sleep as lovingly as she could, with kind words and kinder touch.

And I don't even know how to express the absolute heartbreak with blinding warmth among the cracks, when Death herself kneels before one man, worst man, honest man, who refused her offer – and thanks him with such respect.

Mike Flanagan, you fucking did it again. Carla Gugino, you... I don't even have words for you. That's a whole-ass masterpiece of human soul, meaning, and searching right there.

Kiss Death with kindness in the end

And when she parts

You part as friends

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YellowJackets 2.06 + text posts

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I think the extraordinary thing that Death shows [Dream] is the complexity of humanity. She asks him to bear witness to people in the last moment of their lives and that something happens when you look closely at something. You begin to understand it. And I think that understanding are the first steps towards love. And I think when [Dream] has that pivotal transition, he thinks to himself “If I can feel this about these people after such a short space of time, how do I feel about a man who I’ve spent 600 years with?” And so he returns to him.

— Tom Sturridge about Dream’s relationship with Death, humanity and Hob Gadling [video]

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That being said, I will continue to never let anyone I know IRL read my work.

Embrace the cringe.

Write weird fanfic.

Read weird fanfic.

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The Fall of the House of Usher 1.08 | The Raven (2023)

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It is done, in exchange for peace, the Prince was sent as a tribute to the Dark one… who in fact is overjoyed after finally having a son to raise.

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“Denethor - not a real king, not the real king of Gondor…I call him Little Tomato.”

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Fic authors deserve more credit.

Story time: I started reading a book about 23 hours ago and just finished it. Also in that time, I slept for 10 hours, spent time with family, was at work, etc. Anyway, I enjoyed the book (Simon vs. the Homo Sapiens Agenda,) but it felt like it flew by. So after I finished I looked up the word count because what are pages? Pages are meaningless. I only function in word counts anymore.

The estimate I found was 58,580. My immediate reaction was “oh, that’s why. That’s nothing!” But what a shitty response. Because no. That’s not nothing. That’s a whole. Damn. Book. An entire novel! And fic authors regularly bust out 30k, 50k, 100k, 150k words. AND THEY DO IT FOR FREE. WHILE WORKING AND LIVING THEIR LIVES.

So anyway, thank your favorite fic author today because they deserve it. Because they’re amazing. They’re the MVPs.