subpixie420 - Tumblr blog

[subpixie420]

AC and JDG you know who you both are. And when you are on your deathbeds you'll see ME!!! Like my dad would say in spite of mom in claiming his kid he didn't abuse looked just like him aka a reminder to my mom of their failed marriage

[subpixie420]

The people who seemingly had some sort of camaraderie with me were the most evil people amongst the bunch in terms of sex workers

If you read this and worry it may reside with you. It does and feel bad about it sex workers of Tumblr who were in groups with me.

[subpixie420]

I am so sorry but I just hate it here now

The fake personas out weight the genuine ones

Maybe that's just sex workers

Idk

I just hate it here I don't think I'll return 😔

Especially because fellow sex workers shamed me for also selling my content

I will never forgive that hypocrisy.

Nor will I forgive the silent solidarity that took place behind closed doors while I was being ridiculed.

[subpixie420]

Don't subscribe to popular sex workers on Tumblr

If they have 1k more in notes despite the censorship, don't support them

They climbed their way up with corruption and unfairness

[subpixie420]

Don't subscribe to popular sex workers on Tumblr

If they have 1k more in notes despite the censorship, don't support them

They climbed their way up with corruption and unfairness

[subpixie420]

Don't subscribe to popular sex workers on Tumblr

If they have 1k more in notes despite the censorship, don't support them

They climbed their way up with corruption and unfairness

[subpixie420]

The people who seemingly had some sort of camaraderie with me were the most evil people amongst the bunch in terms of sex workers

If you read this and worry it may reside with you. It does and feel bad about it sex workers of Tumblr who were in groups with me.

[subpixie420]

I am so sorry but I just hate it here now

The fake personas out weight the genuine ones

Maybe that's just sex workers

Idk

I just hate it here I don't think I'll return 😔

Especially because fellow sex workers shamed me for also selling my content

I will never forgive that hypocrisy.

Nor will I forgive the silent solidarity that took place behind closed doors while I was being ridiculed.

[subpixie420]

People don't have time for me because they are too busy living life

And they for whatever reason view me as a stagnant part of it

I understand and don't blame them

Because they are living life, as they should be

While I grovel in my crippling anxieties and depression

I'm not a victim

Nor is anyone lesser than me or should feel bad

It's been said I'm manipulative in expressing my emotions

That's why I'm clarifying

Go live your life

Don't inquire, be concerned, or take offense to my words

Just go live

I'll be here when you deem me worthy

[subpixie420]

Doesn't talk to me in literally months after getting two free trials from me and my porn

Screenshots my Snapchat stories

😒🙄

[subpixie420]

Making social media my job

Well more specifically sex work through Tumblr

Because I hated Twitter

Made me disregard all my hobbies

So strongly so that I had to reteach myself said hobbies

Like they were brand new

That's another reason why

Why I left

Why I put all of myself on a site (onlyfans) that was so inconsistent on it's message until bigger pornstars brought it money

And then expose myself on this sight and say "hey I'm not making enough money"

Even tho I would scroll all day

Reblog all day

Support all day long

And constantly push my work

I was my own advertiser. To the point of annoyance.

Stay relevant in trends and music

So that you will click my links

I even got to the point of begging

Online panhandling

I will never make social media my job again

I enjoy my hobbies, even if I have to relearn them

[subpixie420]

Kinda wish people would stop reblogging my content even tho I said you could

It's really nice and all that but getting the notifications on my phone hurts

I'm sorry that the ones who are nice might feel ignored

I see you nice people I really do and I really appreciate you guys speaking up always

[subpixie420]

hey i’m sad to hear that whatever happened happened but you seem cool

Thanks! I'm not cool tho people just expect me to be and then talk about me behind my back when I don't meet their expectations and am actually a full fleshed out human being like them.

Appreciate you tho!

[subpixie420]

You guys are so cute being happy over me sharing my face and such

Really make a boi feel handsome!

[subpixie420]

Hey Tumblr

I am drunk and I still kinda don't like you as a whole

But I understand that is mostly trauma related due to specific individuals and not because of a whole site in itself

There is love here still.

Happy New Years to you all! Make 2024 your bitch and manifest your dreams! You are magic ✨

[subpixie420]

If I'm ever single again (don't really wanna be)

I'm going to put "if hygiene isn't a priority for you I am also not for you and if you think you can hide it from me you can't and I will shame you for it 🥰" in my dating bio

Listen I know people are depressed but there's a difference between not showering for a week cuz you feel like dying and just being a disgusting lazy person who constantly ignored their mommy growing up

[subpixie420]

My dad was a child groomer

But only to kids he was attracted to (i.e short, scrawny people with womanly hips like how my mothers frame and my frame were when we were in our early 20s/teens)

And something ridiculous to me is that I'm remembering when my OTHER best friend would jokingly hit on him openly and would say "you're just so handsome give me a chance"

It honestly made me scared that she knew my dad had done things to me and my other friend and that this was her weird way of shining light on it

And meanwhile my dad was DISGUSTED he was so uncomfortable around her. He would show great disdain for her behavior.

Probably because she was considered plus sized...aka not his type 😒

He was disgusted enough to know a 15 year old hitting on him was wrong

And he still groomed and had sex with one that was more so "his type"

He probably chalks it up to "inner maturity" nowadays

I hope he grew to be bald and fat and lonely.