#[but each entry is really short okay

[thetriumphantpanda]

you'll just have to taste me | joel miller

Summary | He knows he's no good, knows it's a bad idea, you're out of bounds and should stay that way, but it's okay to test the waters, right?

Pairing | Joel Miller x F!Reader

Word Count | 1.7K

Warnings | this is literally 1.7k of utter filth, you've been warned, it's nasty, I told you, okay? Unspecified age gap, Joel is your dad's buddy and Sarah is your friend. Joel fights with his morals but the pussy is too good. Explicit smut, JUST THE TIP, unprotected PiV, cumshot, cum eating, spit play, dirty talk, Joel talks you through it. No outbreak au, no use of Y/N.

Authors Note | I AM SO INCREDIBLY LATE TO POST THIS, but this is my entry to @hellishjoel's HOT DILF SUMMER CHALLENGE. I know it's September and this was not my original idea, but it came to me and I wrote this in less than an hour. It's filth and it's nasty and I beg you not to judge me okay? Written and edited on my phone so forgive any mistakes.

Divider by @saradika

Main Masterlist | Ko-Fi

He’s going to hell. He’s always known it. Despite the years of his parents putting him in his Sunday best and taking him to church each week with his brother, despite his upbringing and the way he’s always tried to be the perfect southern gentleman, Joel Miller is going to hell, and the evidence in right in front of him.

You. His buddy’s daughter. His own daughter’s friend. The bane of his existence for the whole damn summer, with your short dresses and flirty eyes and the way you make him laugh and the way he’s wanted you since you waltzed back into town, masters degree under arm, with one purpose which seemed to be to turn him on at every possible opportunity.

It’s been bubbling for weeks. You’d caught him in the corridor during movie night with Sarah, whilst she was downstairs microwaving popcorn and he’d had no choice but to kiss you, your lips drenched in something that tasted like mango and made him dizzy. Then, at the annual neighbourhood cookout, when you’d dropped a fork and bent over to pick it up, flashing him those skimpy panties as you did, he’d had no choice then but to drag you upstairs and teach you a lesson, ten sharp slaps on your pert ass and strong words that you needed to stop. He doesn’t doubt you went home that night and shoved three fingers into your cunt and dreamt of him as you came.

But now, it’s all real. Sarah’s gone back to college, your parents back to work, and you have nothing lined up until you start getting invited to interview for positions that you’d applied to with a slew of applications about two weeks ago. It’s why you’re on his bed, it’s why he’s left Tommy on site on his own, and why you’re bare as the day you were born, legs spread obscenely, pussy on display as he stands at the foot of his bed and contemplates whether he really should do this.

“Y’scared, old man?” You tease, one hand trailing down your body, two fingers spreading the swollen lips of your cunt, middle finger dipping inside.

He can see the webbing of slick you drag from yourself, finger slow as it circles your clit. His eyes can’t miss the way your hole flutters as you touch yourself, like it’s begging to be filled, begging to be filled by his throbbing cock that he’s currently fisting in his hand.

“Ain’t scared,” He mutters, “Y’sure you wanna do this?”

You don’t speak in response, just dip two fingers back into your weeping cunt and start fucking yourself with them. He squeezes his cock a little tighter in his hand, feeling the weeping of pre-cum at his tip as he watches.

“Ain’t no comin’ back from this.” He muses, moving forward, knees on the mattress, your legs spreading wider to accommodate the width of his thighs.

“Want you,” Is all he hears from your mouth as his cock rests on your pussy, hot and heavy against your skin, “Want your cock, Joel.”

He thrusts his hips a little at that, dragging his length through the soaking folds of your cunt, head rubbing against the swollen bud of your clit.

“Y’sure?” He asks, continuing the rub of his cock, “It’s all over then, baby,” He coos, “I’ll ruin ya.”

“Good,” You groan out, hips shifting to try and catch his tip at your entrance, to try and get exactly what you want, “I want it, Joel, I want it bad.”

“Y’know what I think?” He asks, looking down at you, stopping his movements and opting to circle your clit with his thumb instead, “I reckon we need t’make sure.”

“I am-” You try and protest, but he’s shushing you.

“I reckon,” He says slowly, bringing the tip of his cock to press to your weeping core, “It don’t count if it’s just the tip,” He pushes his hips forward ever so slightly, not enough to sink inside, but enough that he’s already had a taste of what you’ll feel like around him, “Just the tip baby, and then we’ll know.”

He looks down at you and he can see your wild eyes, the way you nod your head against the mattress. You’re such a good girl for him, taking whatever he’ll give you, so he does just that. With three fingers on the base of his cock, he lets the tip of him push inside you, just enough that the head of his cock is nestled inside you, and he knows he’s fucked.

You’re tight and you’re warm and you’re breathing and whimpering for him, and those perfect walls are clenching around him so right and so good that it takes every ounce of self-control he has not to shove his cock all the way in and damn you both to hell.

“Jesus girl,” He breathes, one hand clutching at your hip to hold you still, “Fuckin’ perfect, ain’t ya?”

You don’t speak back to him, it’s all you can do to lie and try not to writhe too much as he starts his shallow thrusts. The head of his cock popping from your wet cunt and then being sucked back in so perfectly. He’s had his fair share of women since Sarah went to college and he knows he’s a lot to take, knows that he knows what he’s doing too, but when he looks down at you, your eyes tilted back in your skull, cunt squeezing him just right, he can’t help but think this is what he’s been missing.

“That good?” He asks, bringing his thumb back to your clit, swirling wetness across it as he continues the shallow thrusts of his hips.

“Want it all,” You grumble, “Can take it all, Joel.”

“Ain’t got a doubt,” He teases, but doesn’t relent, “But we gotta make sure.”

He wants to lean down, wants to cover your body with his own and suck one of your perfect nipples into his mouth, but he knows the minute he does you’ll beg him so nice and he’ll break, so he resists, swirling his thumb across your clit with more purpose now.

“M’gonna-” You choke out, and he knows, he can feel it, the way you’re fluttering and tightening around the head of his cock so perfectly, “Gonna come, Joel.”

“Yeah?” He asks ruefully, “Gonna come on my cock, pretty girl?” He smiling down at you as your mouth drops open, your cunt pulling painfully tight around him, “Go on, you can do it,” He babbles, trying to fight the tightening in his own stomach until you’ve come for him, “Come for me, baby.”

And you do, by God you do, and he thinks it might be the most beautiful thing he’s ever seen, the sweetest thing he’s ever heard. You whine, a high-pitched kind of thing, eyes clamping shut as you arch your back. There’s more slick around his cock than he’s ever seen before, making it easy for the tip of his cock to ease you through it. The convulsing of your walls around him bring him to his own end, using his last braincell to drag the tip from your cunt and give himself three strokes before the thick ropes of his cum are splashing across your swollen pussy. He watches where they land, painting your skin as his own as his head tips back and breathes a sigh of relief.

He know’s he should stop, but there’s something mesmerising about the mix of his cum and your own, the way he’s dripping down you and onto his sheets. His shuffles down a little and leans forward, using his thumbs to spread your pussy open, before he uses his tongue to gather the mess down there. He’s slurping at you, tasting your cunt through his cum, gathering as much of the two of you as he can in his mouth.

You’re moaning for him when his tongue flicks a few times at your sensitive bud, but then his body is over yours, weight pressed against you as one of his hands takes your chin, squeezing at your jaw to get you to open your mouth, which you do, gladly.

Joel opens his own mouth, letting his cum, your slick and his spit drop from his own into your waiting mouth. He doesn’t give you a minute to swallow anything, his tongue mixing with yours in a kiss that is messy and obscene. He can feel your hips against his own, your hot cunt pressing against him. If he was younger, he’d pin you down and fuck you again, this time for real, but all he can do is pull away.

“Swallow it,” He orders, closing your mouth and watching the bob of your throat as you do what he says, producing your tongue for him, “Good fuckin’ girl.”

He unceremoniously collapses onto the bed next to you, arm over his eyes as he tries to recover some semblance of composure. He can feel your body next to his, shuffling a little closer, and then he can hear you stifling a laugh and then before long, it’s not stifled, it’s full on laughter. He takes his arm from his eyes and looks at you, and can’t help but start laughing himself, until his ribs hurt and you’ve calmed down enough, your body draped across his in the mid-afternoon glow.

“This is bad, huh?” You whisper, fingers dancing through the smattering of hair across his chest.

“Terrible, really.” He responds.

“I’m sure though,” And he holds you a little tighter at that, “Next time, I want the whole thing.”

“Don’t worry baby,” He says quietly, pressing his lips to the crown of your head, “You can have whatever you want next time.”

[delulujuls]

it's just us | mv33

hi! i can't get enough of my dutch duo, so here comes the third part of the mad dutchman and the fearless dutchess and if you didn't read the second part of it but you wanna catch up, here it is!

you can read each of this solo and you can read it all like series. it work well both ways!

so yeah, as usual, bon apetit and enjooooy x

summary: y/n is upset by some media nonsense she read online but max is here to remind her that at the end of the day its just them and the rest doesn't really matter

warnings: i tried with a smut but im not sure how it went, sexual content, +18, eating p, praising, comfort sex?

pairing: fem!redbulldriver x max verstappen

The kiss didn't change anything between Y/N and Max.

In the other hand, it changed everything, but it absolutely did not affect their relationship. There were no nervous questions, no timid behavior, no checking whether a quick kiss at the strategists' table was okay, or whether it was necessary to count down the seconds of the hug they exchanged with each other after the race so that it wouldn't last too long.

To be honest, their entry into a relationship was a kind of relief for the entire team. Christian Horner himself, the team father of the two flying Dutch, seeing them kissing after winning the podium, just shook his head and with a slight smile admitted "Finally, fucking hell".

Of course, the media did not leave a single dry spot on Red Bull drivers. The couple, of course, did not flaunt their feelings left and right, because it was absolutely not their style, but it was difficult to take a seat in the car without a quick kiss and wishing each other good luck. And we know how hungry reporter hyenas are.

"This is absurd"

The girl shook her head and threw the phone into the pillows. It was already late in the evening and the couple was getting ready for bed, as they had a long media day ahead of them tomorrow.

"I told you not to read this nonsense."

Max replied, emerging from the bathroom in shorts and drying his wet hair with a towel.

Y/N didn't answer. She kept her eyes glued to the sheets and felt her stomach begin to ache from nerves. Max knew perfectly well that the lack of an answer meant only one thing. The overthinking machine already started.

He put the towel aside and sat next to her on the bed, wrapping his arm around her and kissing her temple.

"Look at you, a fearless Dutchess worrying about some stupid texts. That's not in your style at all"

He spoke jokingly, trying to cheer her up a bit. However, she was really touched.

"It's just making me sick when someone is saying made up bullshit"

She replied bitterly, feeling tears forming under her eyelids. She could deny with her arms and legs that these were tears of anger, but in the reality she was simply hurted. And Max knew this perfectly well.

"You know very well that this bunch of idiots will write anything for views. At the end of the day, only you and I know the truth. It's just us, remember?"

He said calmly and stroked her shoulder. Y/N sniffed. Max was absolutely right. It's just them and that was all that mattered. Even though she received numerous criticisms in the media over the years, newspapers and Internet portals often trashed her, all this did not make any impression on her. Unfortunately, it was different in this case, because it was no longer just about her. It was about them, about her and Max.

She raised her head and met a pair of blue, gentle eyes. The ocean was calm, july was dominating the cloudless sky. She herself slowly began to feel calm, accepting that it was just meaningless nonsense.

"I love you, but you already know that, right?"

She asked, smiling slightly.

He nodded and returned her smile, kissing her forehead.

"The only thing that matters is that we have each other and we love each other. And as a certain genius said, fuck 'em all."

"Fuck 'em all"

The girl repeated and smiled wider, causing the last tears of sadness and anger to leave the corners of her eyes. Max wiped her cheeks and lifted her chin, kissing her.

Y/N kissed him back, touching his rough cheek. He easily pulled her onto his lap and she sat on his soft thighs, laughing quietly. She knew exactly where this was going.

"We have a lot of work tomorrow, Max."

"We will boycott media day tomorrow. 'Red Bull drivers protest against idiotic headlines' sounds better, doesn't it?" he asked, being so serious that the girl burst out laughing, "Or better yet, 'Red Bull shock!' Couple had sex until dawn to boycott the media', yes!"

"With the link 'see photos', definitely," she added, laughing.

Max took her face in his hands.

"I much prefer it when you smile, you know?"

Y/N nodded and leaned in, kissing him again. He wrapped his arms around her waist and she tangled her fingers in his still damp hair. Their kisses were slow and tender, filled to the brim with love. Years of arguments, making up and standing up for yourself only to argue and slam doors again led to a place where there was an incredible amount of love to give and receive from both sides.

Max slipped his hands under her shirt, squeezing lightly her soft flesh. The girl sighed quietly into his mouth and he smiled at her reaction. If he thought that after so many years, he would fall in love overnight with the girl he always had by his side, he would laugh at himself.

He took off her shirt, so there was no longer any blockage between their heated bodies. Skin pressed against skin, lips pressed against lips. These moments were incredibly soothing for both of them. One might think that after so much time spent together, both in good and bad relationships, one cannot count on any elation. What wrong thinking this is.

Max grunted softly as he grabbed and pressed her closer to him. His soft purr, which lightly touched the girl's ear, gave her goosebumps. He moved from his mouth to her neck, leaving wet, slightly pink traces on her skin. Y/N involuntarily closed her eyes, feeling both the softness of his lips and his rough, scratchy stubble.

"I love the way you smell"

He said quietly, almost in a whisper. She smiled to herself and gently grabbed his hair, tilting his head back, making him break away from her neck and they were able to look into each other's eyes again.

"I taste even better though"

She lunged seductively and crashed into his mouth again. Max easily grabbed her thighs and lifted her, throwing her onto the bed.

"You always have to do this, right?"

He asked, his breathing a little quicker. His aura instantly darkened, and his eyes seemed bottomless. Y/N frowned a bit, not knowing what he meant. But seeing him like this, she only wanted one thing. Him.

"You always have to throw something away, set me straight. Always."

She raised herself on her elbows, looking at him with a slight smile and thus posing a challenge to him.

"You could try to humble me"

As soon as she finished speaking, he pressed her body against the mattress and kissed her deeply. The girl wrapped her legs around his hips and wrapped her arms around his neck. She wanted to be closer, as close as possible.

Their kisses were still full of love, but now the tenderness gave way to passion. When Max moved to the girl's neck, she felt her lips burning and swollen. It didn't help when she bit down on them, feeling Max suck on her nipple. Blue eyes carefully followed the girl's rosy face, wanting to make sure she was giving her nothing more than pleasure.

When his teeth hit the soft skin, a long groan filled the bedroom. Max smiled, licking her breast while massaging the other one with his hand. He much preferred to hear her moans rather than Dutch insults. After a few moments, he moved lower again, kissing his way across her stomach. He tightened his large hands on her sides and buried his face in her stomach. She smiled at his gesture, running her fingers through his hair.

"You're soft, so soft. Fuck, so soft."

Max murmured, his face still pressed against her stomach. Y/N couldn't help but laugh quietly. This whole situation, the very fact that they were now apparently a couple, was unthinkable to her. And the fact that they were both adults and now they were acting like a couple of teenagers.

"Simply, simply lovely"

He shook his head and placed a few more kisses on her skin until he reached the waistband of her panties. He looked up at her face again, wanting to make sure she had her consent, but she, still smiling slightly, just nodded in answer.

Max undressed her completely in one move and spread her legs, hugging her thighs. As soon as his tongue passed over her clit, she closed her eyes and licked her lips. This wasn't the first time they had had sex, but Y/N had already become familiar with certain behaviors Max displayed in bed, and one of them was the desire to please his partner. Max loved to take, but God, he loved to give even more.

As his tongue moved over her clit in smooth, circular motions, his eyes studied her body carefully. Her hard, pink nipples, uneven moving chest, her dry, parted lips, rosy face, her tightly shut eyelids. Max smiled slightly, proud of himself of turning her into such mess. Y/N involuntarily opened her eyes and looked down her body, causing their eyes to meet.

"Do you like it, schat?"

He asked, pausing his movements. He blew lightly on her pink, swollen clit, making her shiver.

"Mhm, please -just, just don't stop"

"As you wish, love"

He replied, going back to work. Her hand involuntarily tightened on his hair and it didn't take much for her back to arch and an orgasm to fill her body. A loud, long moan broke the density that had reigned in the hotel bedroom. Her head felt heavy and dizzy, and it was hard for her to breathe. Max pulled himself up and kissed her, moistening her dry lips with her own juices, which made him all wet. Y/N smiled and hugged his neck, giving him wet, sloppy kisses. He was resting one hand next to her head, and with the other he was trying to free himself from his suddenly too tight and slightly soaked shorts. When he succeeded, he slowly inserted himself into her hot, tight and incredibly wet interior. She broke the kiss, parting her lips at the sudden sensation, digging her nails into his bare, muscular back.

"Fuck, Max, oh my god-"

"Yeah, i know baby" he muttered, stopping his movements "I'll be gentle, take your time"

Max kissed her, wanting to help her relax. She returned each of his kisses, which were now delicate and tender. Max was incredibly gentle and had countless layers of love inside him. His tender touch, sweet nothings whispered straight into the ear, the certainty that his partner is happy and feels incredible pleasure. Max seemed to her as an incredibly selfish asshole at times, but in this case it had absolutely no effect. The only thing he cared about at that moment was pleasing her and distracting her from negative thoughts. After some time, he began to move slowly inside her, feeling that she is not so tense anymore and soon any discomfort disappeared and was replaced by incredible pleasure. Y/N wrapped her legs around his hips and pulled him closer, kissing him deeply.

"I'm all yours now" she said, smiling slightly into his mouth.

"You are and always been mine"

He replied and kissed her back. His movements went from slow and calm to faster and more decisive, increasing in intensity with each passing minute. Single moans that had been thrown into the thick air filling the bedroom some time ago now cut through them like bullets. Max felt the sweat that had formed on his back sting the scratches left by the girl's nails. He sat back on his heels and wrapped his arms around her thighs, now fucking her to the point where they skin were clapping on each other. His fingers dug into the soft skin of her thighs, his still damp hair falling into his eyes. His lips were bitten and every now and then a low moan escaped his throat. His arm and abdominal muscles flexed and relaxed steadily, and numerous love marks adorned his fair skin.

"You look so good, and feel -fuck, feel so good, too"

Y/N moaned, clenching her hands on the sheets, feeling how he perfectly hit her inner, sensitive spot with each movement.

"And you are doing so good by taking me so well, baby"

The truth was that she was a total mess underneath him. She wasn't even fully aware of her words or of her actions, all of this was feeling so good, he was feeling so good.

It didn't take much for either of them to reach their orgasm, which came over them almost simultaneously. A moment later they were lying next to each other, Y/N resting her cheek on his chest and her hand lying limply on his stomach. He was hugging her, tracing lines on her arm.

"I hope you won't worry anymore about any stupid things said by other people"

Max said and kissed her temple. She smiled and raised her head, kissing him on the cheek.

"At the end of the day it's just us, right?"

[hihello-pinky]

Sight (5)

Suna Rintarou X F! Reader

Sometimes, it takes losing someone to finally see them. He wished he knew this before, but Rintaro had to learn this the hard way.

Genre: Angst, Romance, Hurt/Comfort

Disclaimer: This is a work of fiction and in no way represents my views of the original anime/manga characters.

WARNINGS: nothing, just fluff, and OH, did not go through proofreading lols

Word Count: 1.6k

Surprise quick update! I know I said in the last part that things are about to get downhill starting from this chapter. However, I really enjoyed writing this one that I had to cut out the angst portion. So... this is also quite a short read. Happy reading, though!

Kindly reblog, like, and/or leave a comment if you loved this chapter and let me know what you think! xoxo

part one part two part three part four

kofi ~~

˚✧₊⁎⁎⁺˳✧༚ - - - ˚✧₊⁎⁎⁺˳✧༚

“I’m very happy, Y/N,” Dr. Hirai says in front of you as she examines the papers. “These results look good. You haven’t been stressed much lately?”

You beam at the woman. “I guess so. My headaches have rarely occurred as well.”

”Great.” She smiles as she picks up her pen and starts to write. “I’m going to prescribe you some vitamins and supplements. But remember, rest and sleep is top priority, okay?”

You respond with a nod, akin to a child receiving instructions from their parent on the first day of school.

As you wait for Dr. Hirai to finish writing the prescription, a knock comes on the door. After the doctor’s “Come in”, your husband’s head peeks inside.

”Hi, Doc.” He greets before looking at you. “Hey. Something came up at the company and I have to go there. Would you want to wait for me at the cafe across the street?”

Other times you would have felt disappointed about his need to leave, but the mere fact that he’s informing you - through a cute peek at the door nonetheless - makes your heart flutter instead.

“Okay, sure.”

Rin shoots you a smile that almost melts your heart. “Great. I’ll keep you posted.”

And just like that, the door closes again. You turn to Dr. Hirai to see her looking at you. “Anything’s the matter, Doc?”

The woman just smiles before handing you the prescription. “Oh, nothing, Y/N. Nothing.”

˚₊⁎⁎⁺˳༚ ˚₊⁎⁎⁺˳༚

You watch the busy street through the window, your hand tapping a pen against your journal. You’re not one to miss writing daily but these past several weeks, you have been too preoccupied to jot down your thoughts.

Then, there’s also the matter of an irrational fear.

Truth be told, you’ve been happy since that night Rintarou admitted his attraction to you; the night he asked you to give him a chance and for you two to get to know each other.

You’d love to pen down those memories but there’s a voice at the back of your head telling you that it’s a bad idea. That it’s a prelude to something terrible happening.

You place your pen on the table and flip through the older entries on your journal, only to remember the entries you are looking for are no longer in the notebook’s binder. You had them removed and placed in a box the day before you asked Rin for divorce, thinking that it's time to give up on trying to make things work for both of you.

But then, things have changed now.

Or have they really changed? That voice in your head asks in skepticism.

What if, just like before, this “peace” is a fluke? What if Rin ends up hurting you again?

You close your eyes tightly and rub at your temples. You shouldn’t be entertaining this kind of thoughts. Overthinking and worrying about things from five years ago…

”Hey, Y/N? Is that you?” A familiar voice brings you out of your thoughts and you open your eyes only to be met by a friendly smile.

”Oh,” you say in pleasant surprise, “Hi, Hajime. What an unexpected meeting.”

The older guy's smile widens as he gestures for the seat across you. You nod in reply, closing your journal and putting it at the side.

”What brings you here?”

”I had a check-up with my doctor at the hospital across the street. How about you?”

At your question, Hajime scratches his nape. You notice his ears redden and you try not to smile at how boyishly embarrassed he looks. “Um, I’m visiting someone.”

”A friend?”

He locks eyes with you and groans at the teasing look that you know is visible on your face. “Okay, okay. She’s not technically a friend. I… met her one night through an accident, my motorcycle bumped into her. Thankfully, her injuries are not serious.”

”Oh my god,” you cover your mouth in reflex. You compose yourself before continuing, “I’m assuming she’s okay, though?”

Hajime waves his hand in front of you. “No worries! She’s fine and getting better. In fact, she’s about to get discharged tomorrow.” He suddenly clicks his tongue. “Am I bad to feel sad about her being discharged? I won’t have a reason to see her anymore.”

This time, you’re not able to stop yourself from laughing. “Hajime, that’s silly! Why won’t you just ask her out? Or her family and friends, maybe? You probably have met some of them, right?”

He smiles sheepishly and it’s a contrast to his usual demeanor when in the playground with his son. “I’m nervous to ask. Also, her family’s not here. She very recently moved back to the country from living abroad several years before. She also mentioned she has yet to reconnect with any of her old friends.”

”Oh, I see. But isn’t that reason enough to ask her out, if you’re really interested in her?”

”I guess so…”

Seeing the flush on your friend’s face makes you smile. “Who would have thought you’d get yourself in a classic meet-cute scenario?”

”Ugh, Y/N, please stop teasing me.” You know he means to reprimand, but Hajime still joins you in your laughter.

˚₊⁎⁎⁺˳༚ ˚₊⁎⁎⁺˳༚

“Fuck.” Suna resists the urge to throw his phone after the screen died on him. The battery had been on the verge of dying and he couldn’t find his charger anywhere. So, he’s on the way to the cafe, hoping that you didn’t decide to go somewhere else.

As he approaches the entrance, it amazes him how he’s quick to spot you in a crowd now. He sees the baby pink dress you’re wearing, your cardigan looking soft and comfortable over it. He also notes that you had tied your hair into a bun, a few strands framing your face.

And then he notices you’re not alone. To his dismay, he recognizes the person you’re currently with. Before he knows it, Suna is already brisk-walking the short distance from the entrance to your table.

You notice his presence as you look up at him and smile. That very sweet and innocent smile instantly calms him down a notch. He takes a deep breath. “Hey. I wasn’t able to send you a message, my phone died on me.”

”That’s okay.” Then, gesturing to your companion, you ask, “Rin, you remember Hajime?”

Suna tries to sound as nonchalant as possible as he faces the man. “Yeah. What brings you here?”

Hajime gives him what he assumes to be a friendly smile and Suna reminds himself that there’s no acceptable reason why he should give in to the urge to punch the smile out of the man’s face. “I was gonna visit someone at the hospital.”

Before Suna can respond, the man quickly checks his watch as if suddenly remembering and curses under his breath. “Oh, shoot. Uh, I should go.” He gives a wave before going over to the counter to make his purchase.

Suna shakes his head, a small scoff leaving his mouth. “Rin,” you call his attention. “Let’s go?” He watches you zip your bag close and before you can put the strap on your shoulder, he swiftly grabs to carry it for you.

If he didn’t turn his back as soon as he does so, he wouldn’t have missed your blush and smile.

˚₊⁎⁎⁺˳༚ ˚₊⁎⁎⁺˳༚

Once you reach Rintarou’s car, he asks if you have your phone charger with you. As you say yes, he asks again if you would plug it in the car’s charging port as he maneuvers the car out of parking.

You do as he asks and, as you place his phone on the console, notice some things that spark your concern.

”Rin?”

”Yeah?” He responds, eyes ahead.

”I know we both have sweet tooth, but didn’t we agree not to give Risa and Ryuu too much candy?”

”Huh?”

”Lollipops and gums,” you answer, finally tearing your eyes away from the items that had caught your attention. You turn to Rin and watch as the confusion leaves his face.

To your surprise, he only chuckles in response. “Those aren’t for the kids, Y/N. They’re mine.”

Now, it’s your turn to feel lost. “Huh?”

Rintarou bites his lips. “I’m trying to quit smoking. I heard those are nice alternatives.”

”Oh.” You’re at a loss of words for a moment, remembering the many times you have told him in the past that smoking is bad for the health. As you struggle to find what to say, Rin continues.

”It’s gonna take a while though. To be honest, this isn’t the first time I’m trying and it’s really hard.” A small laugh. “I’ve been smoking even before I was legally allowed to. But god, I do hope I can finally quit this time.” He shoots you a quick smile. “I don’t want my wife to leave me because of nicotine problems.”

And just like that, whatever response you’ve been able to come up with in your mind gets forgotten, chased away by the butterflies in your stomach.

Rintarou has been doing this a lot lately: calling you his wife.

Of course he had done so in the past, but they were all said in mockery, with the intent to spite and hurt you. It’s the very opposite now. He knows he makes you flustered and you know he enjoys seeing you blush.

You turn your head to look out the window, hoping he can’t see your very red face. Behind you, he laughs a little. It does not help in calming the beating of your heart. “What’s the matter, Y/N?”

”Shut up, Rin!"

to be continued.

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[eliluvschan]

Tutor

pairing: bang chan x reader

word count: 512

warnings: fluffy, is it suggestive? i'm not sure. + pls tell me if there's something else

genre: fluff

a/n: wrote this really fast right before i had my English exam [which i aced] so enjoy this one while i go celebrate :) enjooooy

i wrapped my hair up in a towel and put on a robe.

when i stepped out of the bathroom, i heard a knock from downstairs.

i put on my slippers and went down. when i opened the door, he was standing there.

“oh..” he looked me up and down. “i’m sorry. i had nothing to do and came earlier.” he laughed awkwardly and scratched the back of his neck.

i could feel myself getting red.

“come in.” i bit my lip.

i closed the door and shook my head as his back was turned to me.

“to get a head start.” he said as i walked him over to the dining table.

“of course.” i said. “uh, just give me a few minutes. i’ll be right back.”

he nodded and sat down. i practically ran up the stairs.

“shit.” i yanked the towel off of my head.

i went over to my dresser, sliding on a clean underwear and putting on a bra. i took off my robe and grabbed a pair of black sweats and a random crewneck.

after quickly blow drying my hair, i grabbed my things and went downstairs.

“i’m so sorry.” i said, sitting down on the chair next to him.

''naurr, i'm sorry.'' he said, his thick Australian accent coming through. ''i have a tendency to show up early to things without warning. i should have called.''

i just nodded.

''let's get started?'' he raised an eyebrow at me.

''yeah.''

long story short, i'm failing entry level Korean.

my teacher reached out to my parents and he said Chan could tutor me. since he's also fluent in English. at first i denied the help, but my mother insisted. and now, he's here.

i opened my Korean textbook to the first page.

there was a list of basic vocabulary and some practice sentences at the bottom of it.

''so, what is it you're having trouble with?''

''everything.'' i scoffed.

''how come?''

''because mr. Lee is so boring and i just can't pay attention to anything that goes on in class. i just don't like Korean. at all.''

he looked at me like i insulted him.

''no offence.'' i reassured.

why did i just say that? he's literally Korean, and trying to help me pass this class. idiot.

''none taken.'' he said. ''do you at least know what yes and no are?''

''네 and 아니요.''

''good.'' he said. ''let's just start with a simple introductory sentence.''

i nodded.

''repeat after me.''

''alright.''

''제'' he started.

''제'' i repeated.

''이름은'' he continued.

''이름은''

''Y/n''

''Y/n''

''입니다.''

''입니다.''

the way the words fell so smoothly and perfectly from his lips practically made me drool.

''very good.'' he grinned. ''i can teach you another simple sentence.''

''okay..''

''키스해주세요.'' he said slowly.

''키스해주세요.'' i repeated. ''what does it mean?''

''kiss me.''

before i knew it, his lips were already on mine while his hand stroked over my right cheek. it took a while for us to pull away from each other.

''like Korean now?''

''네.''

~

[neiptune]

look at you, looking at me

cw: 1.3k wc, this is my entry for @gojoath's yandere collab! this armin comes with charm and a hint of obsessive behavior, it's quite short but i haven't written anything in a minute so i hope you'll still enjoy :)

“Uhm— excuse me?”

The soft voice peels your attention away from the thick book you’ve been immersed in for the past minutes and you suddenly find yourself focusing on delicate features, azure gaze limpid yet hesitant boring into yours.

“I’m so sorry, is it okay if I sit here? The cafe is packed, I’ve been waiting for half an hour now” a tentative smile stretches rose shaded lips “and, well, I could only gather enough courage to ask because we’re kinda here to do the same thing. Unless you’re waiting for someone” the smile grows wider, cheeks dusted with a pink so pretty as he holds up the same book you had started reading just yesterday on the subway.

A little taken aback, you smile too and his dimple gets a little deeper in turn.

“Sure, take a seat! I’m not waiting for anyone”

Armin graciously lets his backpack slip from his shoulder onto the floor and places the battered copy of Les Miserables on the table, at measured distance from your latte. You fixate on the book as he wanders off to place his order, not before offering one last relieved smile and uttering a thanks so quiet it almost gets swallowed by the voices murmuring at different tables and the sound of the coffee machine behind the counter.

The book is worn out, with black ink stains smeared across the fore edge, rendered thicker by what you assume are colorful sticky notes used for annotations. Is he studying it? Or is he just one of those readers who are the complete opposite of you? Always so careful, almost reverent with each title: your fingers explore attentively, to feel the furrows that make each page special, invisible irregularities that make you smile and bring comfort until you truly can’t resist anymore and bring the book up to your face to give it a quick sniff. When you encounter a paragraph or a sentence that you can’t risk forgetting, the palest trail of a pencil is the only thing you use to highlight it.

When the stranger comes back with his cappuccino, cocoa powder sprinkled on top, it’s a bit disappointing that he simply sits down across you and picks up the book once more without uttering a single word. Usually you’d simply go back to reading too but he has nice hands with fingers that spread prettily to hold what’s not exactly a light book, the afternoon sun is hitting his fair hair just right and you’ve been sitting in silence for enough time to crave a chat—

His gaze travels up from the page that had his brows furrowing and you’re so embarrassed to be caught staring with the same intensity some lurker would have.

“God, sorry” you chuckle nervously, blood suddenly simmering underneath excessively layered clothing, “it’s just… you seem to really like it. The book, I mean. I’m always scared to ruin the ones I love the most but yours seems just as loved”.

He smiles and a pretty blush sets on his cheeks as one hand timidly scratches the back of his neck.

“Well, I mean, love changes things. I like looking back at the things I loved and seeing how different they are compared to when I first got them, you know?”

“Yeah” you smile back “yeah, I think I know what you mean. Would it be weird to ask about the notes you’re taking?”

“Of course not, but I’d ruin the book for you. To keep it vague and spoiler free, I usually highlight dialogues or descriptions that really impress me. If they remind me of authors or poetry I have already explored, I expand on the concept and add my own thoughts. It’s messy and very underwhelming once you actually go through it” his awkward smile radiates warmth and, hell, you think it’s attractive.

“You sure make it sound anything but underwhelming, though” you deem the chuckle you elicit a small victory, so it’s only natural to finally introduce yourself.

Armin utters his name with bashfulness, he’s aware it sounds odd but your reaction to hearing it for the first time is the one thing he wouldn’t have been able to predict. You say it back: Armin. Wow! Are you from Germany? I think it comes from Arminius. Yeah, sorry, I have a Classics degree!

Armin.

It sounds so much better when you say it and he licks his lips by a weird reflex that tastes like coffee instead of the sweetness of your chapstick: you’re wearing it today too, not really one for lipsticks, the dim lights of the crowded cafe accentuating the mild shine of your pretty lips. 100% natural, moisturising peppermint lip balm. He can’t wait until he’s alone once more to apply the waxy consistency to his lips with his index finger, just like you always do.

“Jean” Armin replies to your question with ease, his thoughts are already wandering off but you certainly don’t need to know that as you take a sip from what he’s sure it’s a latte gone cold “not only because he shares one of my friends’ name. I just love that he embodies hope, even in such darkness”

He knows you’re gonna love Enjolras and perhaps even Eponine, conflict and tragedy always, inevitably luring you in. Armin wouldn’t love you as much if you weren’t so fascinated by pain: the movies you usually pick, all the plays you have watched with friends and family, even those ridiculous true crime podcasts you listen to at night right before going to bed, show that you have depth, that you’re interested in the fundamental sorrow and evil that lies in everything human.

Not in you. The pettiest thing you ever did was getting the last twix from the vending machine at your workplace, to get back at your idiotic colleague. You’re incapable of being selfish or wicked and that’s what worries him the most, that’s what keeps him awake at night and urged him to finally bring himself to come out into the open.

It's a little unfortunate: he hates ruining books and had to visit a couple different shops to find an edition that would match yours, hours spent cracking the spine, aging those brand new pages, adding empty colorful sticky notes and random stains. Tea, coffee, ink, the explosion of an old but elegant fountain pen, different bookmarks to make the book look thicker, fuller, filled with thoughts that never really existed. He's read it while in high school, hated every page, each character, dialogues and painfully detailed descriptions a never ending agony that used to fuel his nightmares as a student.

Most importantly, Armin is far from having everything ready for you just yet. But man, was this worth it. You’re more beautiful than ever up close, your voice is as smooth as the satin of the pink ribbons he has bought for you. Now Armin’s certain they’ll match the color of your eyes just right.

“You have a friend named Jean? That’s so cool!” you lean forward over the table, it’s imperceptible but, like an opposite magnet, he’s instantly drawn to your floral scent.

“He’s okay” he chuckles with sincere affection “always drags me along for the most insane hikes”

You huff, sympathetic.

“Ouch. I hate hikes” of course you do “I’d probably just ghost him”

“Tried that. He has the keys to my apartment so he simply dragged me out of bed at the crack of dawn”

You wrinkle your nose adorably.

“Damn, that’s some dedication. Maybe I’ll end up meeting this Jean guy and convince him to leave you alone”

Armin freezes in his seat. Ths first thought that crosses his mind is not a chance in hell.

He’ll keep his friends away from you, Jean and Connie and Eren, with their charming smiles and good looks and lame jokes you’d be too polite not to laugh at. You’re too good for them, you’d be too good for anyone, the thought of you sitting in a coffee shop on your own is already torture. You truly don’t realize how hideous and dangerous the world and its people can be.

“What’s that face?” the silver tinkling of your laugh is a pleasant interference for increasingly febrile thoughts “you weren’t even going to ask for my number, after all this?”

Armin blinks his surprise away, heat spreading in his chest with the intensity of fireworks explonding in the night sky.

He licks his lips again.

[inhuman-obey-me]

Babel-ing: An Overview of NB Lesson 44

Okay, we have a couple things to talk about with regards to the latest lesson! Some interesting worldbuilding and some moments that leave us with many questions. Let's get into it, shall we?

(spoilers for NB Lesson 44 below the cut)

In terms of worldbuilding, the main point of focus in this lesson is on Babel and its power as a "place of solace and bliss."

What does this mean in practice? Well, in classic OM fashion, it means we get to rapidly cycle through short little scenes of what each brother's individual "bliss" looks like, one at a time -- with some getting more depth to the writing than others, unfortunately.

Specifically, they boil Asmo's down to just "compliments", Levi's to "TSL", and Satan's, as exhaustingly usual, to "cats". This was presumably in the interest of time, but considering what the next three then get -- come on, really?

Starting with Mammon's, however, it starts getting a little bit more thoughtful. Considering the first three, it seemed like his would probably be something to do with money, but instead, Babel gives him a little private time with MC -- though, not that private, as it turns out everyone else was just invisible. Mostly, that just makes for a funny scene, but it does say something notable about how magic works in Babel: they entered as a group and apparently must experience all of the moments collectively as a group, even when Babel is trying to grant a wish of privacy.

Next, Beelzebub and Belphegor are implied to get their bliss in the form of happiness for each other. Belphie's consisted of Beel getting to happily eat a bunch of food, and then for some odd reason, there was an odd bit about him snubbing and frowning at all the other brothers during what was supposed to be his happy time. The game suggests this is because Mammon and Asmo started sucking up to him in hopes of also getting in on their wishes being fulfilled, and he's mad about it because of the prior "Belphie is the imposter" suspicions during the entry riddle. But even so, it's a bit strange that half his "bliss" scene consists of him being grumpy, so...that's a thing.

Beelzebub's, in turn, is to make Belphie happy - specifically, for everyone to fall asleep and share a dream of the Celestial Realm together, which is when things get especially interesting.

We have theorized before that Belphegor is the one who most seems to miss the Celestial Realm, so it brings up a question of whether Beel also wishes for them all to be back there, or whether the setting is because that's where he feels Belphie would be happiest. The brothers start reminiscing excitedly about a particular memory of Raphael going after Mammon for skipping out on work, while Belphie naps happily at their feet.

There are, however, two very notable exceptions to the brothers' nostalgia - Satan and Lucifer.

No matter which of the two you address about their silence, Asmo apologizes about the fact that Satan, not having been around at the time, probably feels out of place because he once again doesn't share the same memories that the others are talking about. Now, the game handles this by deciding that, actually, since it has been established before that Satan has some of Lucifer's old memories, he does "remember" about that particular moment, and has Belphie tug on Satan's clothes in his sleep to suggest that the brothers still think of him as part of the family.

It does not, however, address how Satan might feel about the fact that one of his brothers' representations of "bliss" consists of being back in the Celestial Realm. It probably doesn't feel great for a demon who has never been an angel to just be placed into one of the angel outfits and be told, essentially, that their happiest times were before he was born, but just with him added in now! Even if he has a memory of it from Lucifer's point of view, he's not actually part of their memories in their minds.

And although questioning Lucifer's silence brings up the same discussion, he likely would have had his own reasons for being uncomfortable in this situation. We know that he has always harbored guilt over his brothers falling alongside him. In NB Season 1, he even wanted to send his brothers back to the Celestial Realm without him, so that they could be spared from sharing his punishment! They all chose back then to stay with him and Satan in the Devildom, but it must feel pretty painful then for him to have concrete proof that one of the brothers would be happiest by being angels again in the Celestial Realm after all.

Well, that sure makes it a bit of an awkward transition when the last up is, as always, Lucifer himself! Nothing in particular really happens for his, with MC pointing out that his bliss has just been seeing his brothers happy that whole time. And for once, they also throw in a little side story based on some options for what MC's "bliss" moment is, which is nice to see for once!

After everything, Raphael (the real one this time) shows up and instantly gets accused of being Michael again, leaving him grumbling about how he'd been sent by the top seraph himself to guide them but it seemed that was not needed after all. And then we get one more very interesting nugget of worldbuilding lore -- it has actually only been their souls in Babel that whole time, and their bodies have been left elsewhere.

This, combined with texts to Solomon from Diavolo last lesson, and Thirteen this time, inquiring about his choice not to go in with the family, bring up some fascinating questions. When Diavolo had asked, the sorcerer had suggested he might not pass judgment to get in and didn't want to bring the brothers down with him. However, this time, when Thirteen asks, he is more evasive and answers that it's complicated.

It's not entirely clear if his decision to keep away from the inside of Babel is related to this bit about their souls, but it's certainly a fascinating possibility! After all, we heard a bit about Solomon's soul from Thirteen in earlier Nightbringer seasons...

Finally, there's one more detail which stood out after our return from Babel. In two separate post-story texts, Simeon and Raphael both check in on how MC is doing after their trip to Babel, with the latter in particular expressing concern about any issues and encouraging them to go to bed early to "be on the safe side."

As we discussed last time, Babel is a very well-kept secret, and on the Celestial Realm side, only seraphs are even supposed to know of its existence. It was also a seraph (Michael disguised as Raphael) who administered the judgment test for them to enter. That makes it quite interesting that, aside from Lucifer who is with us, it is the seraph and former seraph who check in on us afterwards. Could this imply something more harmful or unsettling about Babel, despite the "place of solace and bliss" description? Or is it simply a reference to the strange magic that exists in Babel?

We'll see if any more of Babel is mentioned later in the season, but considering we also haven't heard from or about Nightbringer (you know, the one this new game is literally named after) in quite some time, who knows? Time will tell if the devs will follow up on any of their plot threads, ever!

[hummingbird-games]

2023 In Review (Indie Games)

Last year's! | 2021

I apologize in advance for how long this might be. As a reminder, I don't bash games here so even if I hated something with every fiber of my being...I ain't sharing. As a second reminder, my more in depth reviews and live blogging has moved to Gem's Game Gems so I don't clutter the HBG's main blog. Okay. ON WITH THE REVIEW!!

DEMOS

Diffraction (Demo)- A rainy day otome indeed. I love the quiet gentleness of this game, the two romance options, and the fact that our MC is a photographer and struggling with her art and stack of life "failures" (because...SAME!!)

Alaris - I was asleep and now I am awake: I came late for the advertised fae and dragon lore, stayed seated and waiting for Fenir zjgjdf. Oh, and I guess the mystery surrounding our MC's abilities LOL.

The Summit Library - When I say I was maaaaaad when I realized I blew through chapter 1 and would have to go back to waiting for more content??? LOL, I was very miffed. Anyhoo, check out this title for the gorgeous art, another intriguing mystery (like what is *up* with the magic in the poor library?? who or what is to blame?? 👀) and of course the lovely characters we've been introduced to thus far.

Of Sense and Soul - I'm a regency romance girl. Like after you strip away the other stuff, I am but a poor woman with simple needs: a good ass love story 🤧💛 It's about the yearning and the slow burn and the will they/won't they/PLEASEEE they...I've never been so charmed by a demo, and the full game is going to be amazing I just know it!

Made Marion - This project is a game I've been keeping tabs on for a hot minute but hadn't taken the time to sit and properly enjoy the demo. I'M SO GLAD I DID!!! It's in early access now, so I'm hoping eventually I'll be able to carve out some time to play, but guysss Velvet Cupcake is doing the Thing?!? No idea which love interest I'll go for first, but I had a fun time meeting the Nottingham peeps in the demo.

Herotome (Super Demo) - Oh gosh. Oh gosh oh gosh oh my GOSHHH. Where do I even began?? (Really the question is where the hell do I end because this is one of those projects I talk about a lot/think about a lot and surprisingly haven't run out of things to say zkjfksjd). Another game I've been following for a while, it 100% lives up to the superhero genre in its aesthetic, the characters you interact with, the music and sound design, and of course the slowly unfurling story. Jade and Mia had come out as my top faves, Warden is still there, like hovering in the backgroud, shhhh but I have a special place in my heart for Griffin too (that conversation we have with her?? I have so many screenshots just so I can go back and reread and sear the words in my brain. Like a weirdo. Yup.)

Celestial Crowns - Stats building, celestial royalty, dating sim where you fuck around and find out your choices directly affect your MC's personality?? I'm sat. I supported the Kickstarter and now I try to practice patience for the full game's release siiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiighh.

OTOME/JOSEI JAM

Please note this is a SUPER abridged list for my sanity and I fell a little more in love with these 2 jams with each entry I played...

Intertwine - As embarrassing as it sounds, I've never given much thought to the "red string" thing, and I consume more than enough romance media LOL!! But Van is suuuuuch a beautiful man, the UI for this game is so interactive and lovely, the music is ALSO lovely, just lovely-love all the way around teehee. (Also this game encourages replayabillity so like, do with that info what you will.)

Spring Boy [Demo] - I believe this game is going through a complete rehaul, so my thoughts and feelings refer to the original jam entry I played. The art is bright and cute and it's a super super short demo, but I was intrigued by the other student we meet on our mission to plead with our professor about our bombed exam lol!

Assignment Due: Project Blue - IRl group projects??? Suck absolute ass. Group projects with a guy name Asher?? Suddenly it's my new favorite thing in the world 😁

Cryptid Campaign Manager [DEMO] - Remember the last time I looked over a cryptid dating sim??? Remember how I was SUCH a fool?? Good thing I didn't make that mistake again!! The prologue is such a tease but you get an idea of what the full game is gonna be like, and I'm excited to see where my career involving love (and politics) goes!

Heart Cage [Demo] - Yoooooo I stay my ass far far far away from yanderes (could never get into the trope or the character type). WELP. Guess I just needed to keep searching because I really downloaded this off a whim--well, the whim being one of my fellow dev peers playing and rating-- and proceeded to get sucked in 🤧I thought being a detective would be the highlight, but I guuuueeesssss I was more into the romance options than I thought. Oops.

Evernight - I tried to explain what this game meant to me on the side blog, but words failed me. I still don't know what to say other than I loved it?? Which is like ummm I say I love everything, and yeah I'm easy to please BUT Y'ALLLLLL if you play no other game, play this one. Please. Date a werewolf. Or a vampire. Or a fae. Plz. Also figuring out the mystery of your MC's abilities and past is just delightful, ugh.

Bright Oak (demo) - Anotha one I wrote about on the side blog!!! Play this one!!! The writing is lush and atmospheric and the characters are all delightful and it's another game with a mystery to untangle!

The Faithfulness of the Universe- This one gets the award for most unique all around entry that I played. Theeeeee prettiest pixel art to bless my eyeballs, and this tasty mystery concerning Fate and witch Faustina's future (or lack thereof 👀) and what it all means. As a player I very much want to know what it all means!

A Cup For All Seasons - Another game that needs its flowers y'all. It's short but super healing and super cozy and the voice acting and music really tie the gaming experience together???

The Working Woman's Guide to Burning Bridges - DEMO - It's the way I played the demo twice and I've been thinking about it ever since 😭😭😭🙃 obviously life happens and things come up, plus this was a demo. But. BUT!!! I am on my hands and knees prayinnggg the team gets together again to finish the game. I love playing as a stressed, lowkey bitter hot mess who doesn't have her life together 😂somehow the fictional version is soooo much more entertaining!!!

Keyframes (Spring Demo) - After the game College Craze, this is legit THE college, slice of life visual novel of my dreams. I cannot wait for the updated demo next year, and the Kickstarter whenever that rolls around. And now that the developer is on Tumblr, I've definitely been stalking the account and reading each new post like it's my day/night/weekend job 🤧

Hello Counsel 💋 - Okay I take it back, Evernight is like a 20/10 but Hello Counsel is like an 100/10 👁️👄👁️ This game is necessary for my mental, emotional, physical, and spiritual health, alright? The banter ✅ the character designs ✅ the music ✅ the sizzling chemistry between Poise and Salem ✅ I wish this game had more buzz because IT'S SO GOOD!!! (also the dev, Miseri, is who I wanna be when I grow up. I've made it through almost their whole backlog of games and there are no misses and EVERY game is different from the rest and it makes it hard for a toodler dev--ME--to cope LOL)

Candied Hearts - Isekaied into a candy themed game?? Sign me TF UP!!! (Peppermint I love you dearly, you must understand.)

Fully Released & Played (at least 1 playthrough)

The Knight's Dilemma - I don't even know how I originally stumbled upon this??? I just know it had been in my backlog for a hot minute and I was intrigued enough to save it way back when. Y'ALL WHY DIDN'T I PLAY SOONER SKJFHFJFH! There's a couple different endings, I loved the voice direction, AND it's such a simple concept of a game that was just executed beautifully.

Trouble Comes Twice - If I had to make a top 5 list of romance VNs, guess who makes the list?? Guess. Guess guess guess. Have you guessed yet??? LOL! I have been in love with TCT since it's development days and with each passing month, waiting in anticipation, playing the Pateron beta builds, screaming on the main blog about every single thought I had about Jace and Hazel (shoutout to Jace for helping me figure out *me*) Lol if you're curious about said thoughts, those posts are on this blog and not the side blog.

Aelfric the Wondrous - 10/10 would love to forget my first play through JUST to have that experience fresh again 😭😭💛Cute and funny and a wonderful parody type game all around.

A Summer's End - Hong Kong 1986 - Goodness, there's no excuse for why this took me years to finish but anyhoo, I finished, I loved it, I recommend it! It's romantic and achingly authentic and the art is soooo gorgeous I literally can't stand it 😭

The Things You Do For Love - Unhinged yandere manages to entertain and garner sympathy and laughter from Gemini. And that poly ending is chef's kiss too????

Band Camp Boyfriend - There are a handful of games I found and loved before I began my game development journey, and this is one of them. BCB is so dear to me, because of the story and characters but also because of the Dynamic Duo creators and their team behind the scenes. I was never a band kid I was a chorus kid but just as the band geeks loved this game to pieces, us normal folks do too!! Even the boys who I didn't like I STILL managed to find joy in playing their routes (still have a few more to finish at the time of this posting lol, GOTTA GET THE FINAL ROUTE YO). Anyway, this game more than delivered for me and I hope more people keep discovering it!!

Belle Automata: Chronicle I [RELEASED] - While only Chronicle 1 is out at the time of this posting, I already know that the 2nd and 3rd parts are going to be just as amazing???? I wrote about this one on the side blog, so here's my copypaste that still rings true:  

I love TNP (The Nightmare Prince) but Victor’s route hit the sweet spot for me. Maybe it’s the slow(er) burn nature of this route, maybe it’s the reserved nature of Victor and watching him slowly start to care (AND NOT KNOW WHAT TO DO WITH THOSE FEELINGS TEEHEE) for me.

A Date with Death - I wrote about this on the side blog--again--. The demo. And then right after finishing a route. And then again where I was fully awake and still managed to sound deranged. No copypaste for that, I shall be nice. But yeah!! Another game where I was screaming at the sky about how much I love it and how I'll never know peace as long as I live.

Our Life: Baxter DLC - I need to offer an official apology to both Cove and Derek because falling head over heels, down the stairs, crashing into the parking lot, falling again but down a manhole for Baxter's infuriating ass was NOT on my 2023 bingo board??? HELLO???? I bought his DLC just to complete my OL collection. Was not expecting to love it this much. Was not expecting to be called to write fanfic and abandon all responsibilities to do this. WHILE DOWN WITH COVID TOO. Allow me to play the song of my people. *Send in the Clowns plays*

Our Cinderella - (this is so funny I'm taking about a side game before the main game LOLOLOLOL) Guys. Guysss. You guyyyysss 🥹if you're looking for a cozy, hilarious, equally oddly and wonderfully sweet short game, this is the one!! You may have your personal favorite Iggy ship (like me) but all the pairings are so amazing and just make sense lol!

Wylde Flowers - This is the only non visual novel game on here but it gets the spotlight because I did NOT spend 90+ hours on this game to gatekeep this beauty. No. It the coziest, the funniest, the funnest, the most addictive Switch game (after Teacup) I've ever played.

Fully Released (& still on 1st playthrough)

Garden of Seif: Chronicles of an Assassin - Life kicked my butt and then sat on me SO while I finally got my grubby hands on the full copy, I still have only played the entirety of the demo. But. We will return to this in 2024 and hopefully I'll have a full review for the next wrap up!

Our Wonderland - I looked back at the side blog and I can't believe it was only THIS year that I started OW??? Because I'd known of the game and the dev for longer than that??? So basically what I'm saying is that I was chicken shit for longer than I've been in love with this world that Developer Carrot has created kjzhhshggj. But OMG to get me, who is scared oh so easily to get hella invested in this clearly labeled horror game??????????????? And even with shit gets super absurd and hella disturbing, I cannot stop playing. At the time of this post, I'm only in Act 4, hence the category above, but it's only because I play each act in a sitting and lose track of space and time and myself. That's a compliment btw.

...

Okie!! That's 2023 in a nutshell! I played a looooot of really good games this year and while I would have liked to talk about them all, I think this list provides a nice overview.

Let me know if we share any favorites!

- Gemini 💛

[lovedrruunk]

‘Awkward meetings ❀⋆.ೃ࿔

Venture (Overwatch x reader)

Authors note!! ＼(＾▽＾); second venture fic!! Tbh I just rlly rlly rlly hated my last one so I’m giving it another go bc I’m actually just so in love with them.. If you see me pocketing the HELL out of a venture mind yer damn business. also im having a pretty tough time coming up with scenarios so id rlly appreciate some ideas!

This was new. Sloane wasn’t nervous; they weren’t the nervous type! They’re bold, and fun, and eccentric (in a good way!) and they most definitely weren’t nervous! So why was it that each time you came around they seemed to trip over their words?

“Young love…” Tracer and Angela couldn’t help but smile, looking at the two of you from a distance as they were enjoying their coffee in Gibraltars HQ lounge.

Any regular person would call them crazy for seeing anything romantic about your awkward short interactions, but knowing both of you when you’re apart tells them everything they’d need to know.

“Yea!... I like your nails! They look… aesthetically pleasing…”

“Oh, thank you! Yea um- painted them myself!”

“Really? Wow! That must’ve taken like… a billion years!”

“Haha!...Yea!”

In the distance, both women were heavily facepalming. They couldn’t help but cringe at the conversation, and as cute as the two of you were, awkwardness had its limits and you two seemed to hit it a while ago.

Sloane didn’t plan on the conversation going this way, they promise! It’s just each time they try talking to you their palms start to sweat and their knees start to wobble and the only thing they can focus on is your face and your voice and trying to think of the right joke to make you laugh and suddenly all those late nights of coming up with scenarios in their head of what to say to you while giggling and kicking their feet are left completely forgotten. All the diary entries describing exactly what they would say and do in order to at least be your friend have now gone to waste.

To be more than an acquaintance to you, that's all they’re asking for, they’ve lowered their standard and yet they couldn’t even reach it!

With a heavy sigh, they turn to look at you, wanting to give the conversation one more try. “Look… I’m really sorry for how lame I'm being. To be honest, I just think you’re really cool and it feels like I have no idea how to approach you!” They smile as they feel their nerves calm now that they’ve confessed to their nervousness. You feel a weight lift off your shoulders, and you’d be lying if you said you weren’t happy they had decided to break the ice first.

“Oh gosh okay, I’m so glad I’m not the only one who felt that way!! I’ve always thought you were cool and funny, honestly I just really wanted to get to know you.”

At this point, you were both smiling and it seemed like the heavy atmosphere had completely vanished now that you were both being transparent.

In the background, Tracer and Angela celebrated quietly, proud of the two of you for finally being able to act normal around one another. You two spent the next couple of minutes warming up to each other as you laughed and joked making plans to hang out, a warm feeling now in your chests.

“Y’know I don’t even know why I was so intimidated in the first place…”

“You could sense my gay agenda.”

[eddywoww]

Eddie Munson is the defacto leader of a coed theater fraternity at his Uni. They’re a close knit bunch who have each others back at all times, even if the rest of their school might see them as a joke.

The only problem is that their meetings are historically usurped by the Alpha Phi frat house who happen to be placed right next to the classroom that they are forced to squeeze their meetings into. Do they get a frat house? No, of course not. It doesn’t help that Eddie has actual beef with the frats vice president, some floppy haired idiot he refuses to learn the name of (Steve Harrington) because he’s stolen Eddie’s parking space like five times since the semester began and he keeps stopping by their class, seemingly looking for Eddie (who definitely doesn’t dip out to hide every time, he’s not about to fight some sports scholarship kid)

It doesn’t help that the animosity between the two groups isn’t new. It doesn’t help that they’ve been fucking with each other years before Eddie even arrived at the Uni. It’s kind of a time honored tradition to try and get under each others skin.

So when Benny the Octopus goes missing one day, naturally, Eddie freaks the fuck out. That’s their octopus made of welded together scrap metal, thank you very much and he’s been in the theater for over a decade. They protect Benny, they love Benny. How did the frat even get their hands on him? And if you, like Robin, are bothering to ask “Why would you assume it was them, Eddie?” Then you can actually just shut the fuck up because it was definitely 100% them.

This entire ordeal leads to Eddie taking one for the team, obviously. Which further leads to Eddie sacrificing himself in the name of Benny to climb the short distance up the back of Alpha Sigmas stupid little frat house and into their second floor bathroom because it’s the only point of entry that Eddie can truly find that won’t get him automatically tackled to the ground. Could he go to a higher up and solve this problem without breaking and entering? Maybe. But that’s boring.

So he goes on his espionage recovery mission, realizing too late that maybe he isn’t the sneakiest person imaginable as he grapples with vines and barely manages to get solid footing on the ledged roof below him. And then he’s in the bathroom, pulling himself through the window and- right. It doesn’t matter that it’s 2 am. This is a frat house, Eddie. These are frat guys, why would they be asleep?

It’s with a big whopping holy fuck oh no what have I done, that Eddie falls through the window and onto the floor of a steamy, recently used bathroom. Because someone had been showering. Because said someone is standing there with a towel held firmly over his crotch, a deer in headlights expression marking his face as brunette hair drips onto his chest.

And Eddie has no clue what to do because being faced with a naked, let alone wet Steve Harrington is doing things to his brain (and his dick) that he can’t really handle.

And then Steve opens his mouth to blurt out “Whyareyouinmybathroom pleasedonthurtme!” And okay, that’s maybe a little dramatic. Which Eddie tells him, before realizing that he is in fact wearing a ski mask. So like, fair. But then it clicks on Steve’s face and he relaxes fast into a bitchy frown. “You’re that fucking theater kid, aren’t you?”

Which, okay. Eddie wasn’t aware Steve even knew him.

He makes his way off the floor and “I’d offer to shake your hand but uh-“ Steve turns bright red and winds the towel around his waist as quickly as possible. Right. Down to business. “I want Benny back.” Which, as it turns out, Steve feigns like he has no clue who Benny even is. Rude. “Big, metal, kind of looks like shit.”

Steve could not get any redder as Eddie tries to explain himself in a roundabout way, not at all going into a tangent about his distaste for the frat while Steve drips onto the floor. And then-

“I have no clue what you’re talking about and it sounds like you have weird one sided beef because I have never intentionally done anything to upset you.”

And that’s just- that is not true. That’s not true. At all.

“You steal my parking space!”

“They’re not assigned!”

“It’s a respect thing and you keep coming to my meetings, looking for me by name! Which is weird by the way!”

“I wanted your number!”

As soon as Steve blurts it out, he clams right up and Eddie just- he just- “You wanted my number?” Because that’s inconceivable. That doesn’t make sense. “Why didn’t you just ask for it?”

“Because you hide every time I try to find you!” Steve blurted out again, eyes squeezed shut like he was genuinely embarrassed and right. He was naked and maybe had a crush on Eddie? Which was- yeah, Eddie wanted to touch him now. But he wanted to be cautious too. So he made his way closer slowly, trying to give Steve an out. He really was so pretty close up, a fact that Eddie had been trying desperately to deny for so long now.

Eddie reached up and pulled his stupid mask off, staring at Steve as his eyes opened back up, tentative and stressed.

“You could ask me for it now,” Eddie said with a small grin, lips upturned as Steve chewed on his bottom lip. “I might say yes.”

Steve rolled his eyes, reaching up to smack Eddie across the back of his head. Eddie caught his hand and pulled him into an unmasked kiss.

[natriae]

tw// mentions of injuries and cuts, nothing else that i can think of (lmk)

Being in a relationship with simon can be hard sometimes. He's gone for month's at a time leaving you with no knowledge of where he is or if he's even safe. You trust him, you do really, but this time around you've been noticing your anxiety spiking at random times.

Subconsciously praying no more horrible things happen to him. He won't tell you much, but if his insomnia and nightmares tell you anything it's that he's experienced a lot. More than just his family issues. You've caught your mind wondering off from work wondering if he's gotten enough rest, if he's eaten enough, or even if he misses you.

When you and Simon began dating you knew it would take a lot of emotional maturity to be with him. Things often worked out in your favor and the two of you never pushed each other for more, but watching your friend's cuddle up with their partners or holding hands cracks something in you. You don't even know when or if your boyfriend will be home.

Sleepless nights and your own supervisor noticing your lack of productivity. Your friend's take notice of your distress and beg you for a night out. You tell them you're tired and end the night tossing and turning in your bed. Weeks go by of the same routine, and Simon's pillow begans to lose his scent.

Eventually, one night in the middle of spring, the click of the lock being opened grabs your attention. Your body standing up wanting to run into his arms, but that's not the kind of relationship you and Simon have. You resort to standing in the entry way waiting for your big, burly man to walk through.

His short, dirty blond hair is messy on his head as a black mask covers his mouth and nose. You're surpised he's not wearing his baklava, but you've missed him far to much to care. Ghost was left back at the barracks, the man before you wears a black sweatshirt and balck tatical pants. His boots are muddy, but he doesn't make the effort to take them off quite yet. His duffle bag drops to the floor as he walks over to you.

One day you hope you'll be able to run and jump into his arms, but for now your okay with having him come to you. His left hand comes behind your head as he leans down to kiss your forehead.

"I'm going to get a shower, love" he gruff voice states before unlacing his boots and walking past you. That crack in your heart felt bigger now. You know you won't hurt him, he knows too, but PTSD doesn't just go away.

He loved your independence. He loved that you didn't need him to survive, and while that may be true now that you've been with him it you know how badly it hurts when he's not there. You don't want to be needy. You don't want simon to think your whiny, but if your not the right person for him you'd encourage him to find them. Yet the thought of leaving him brings would bring a gash on your heart that would never heal.

Walking to your shared room you grab a pair of sweatpants and a t-shirt for him to put on after his shower. Allowing him the option to cover any healing wounds. It's late and you know he wouldn't want you up worring.

Opening the bathroom door Simon finds you zoned out while grabbing your pajamas for the night. You hand aimlessly placed in the dresser draw while your eyes rarely blink. His large palm rests on your shoulder nearly scaring you half to death.

"love, is everything alright," his eyebrows furrow as he takes in your reaction. You know better then to lie him. He always knows.

You guide him to the edge of your bed and sit next to him. "Simon," you take a deep breath attempted to keep the tears at bay. "I missed you," you continue quietly looking down at you fidgeting hands. He waits for you to continue before speaking. " I just, this time was harder around," glancing up to see his expression you know he understands what your talking about. His rough hands cradle your face wiping the tears that escaped.

"I need you to tell me what you need," is all he said sound more like a command rather than comfort, but you know he's trying. He wants this to work out as much as you do.

"just..just hold me please,"

And at that he makes sure his arms curl around you as the two of you lay under the sheets. Your ear resting just above his heartbeat reminding you that he will always be here for you.

[inaris-mage-of-storms]

}{ Who Are You? Are You Nobody, Too? }{

}{ Thrown into a strange game with no memories of their lives before, Jimmy and Scott find comfort in a quiet valley and in each other. }{

}{ 3rd Life }{ Flower Husbands }{ 3.9k }{ sfw abridged version of an entry for Driving After Dark 2 }{

"We're married now."

Jimmy gaped as Scott grinned at him behind the delicate petals of the flower he held to his nose. "E - excuse me?"

It was just a bit, surely. The sort of joke that he would usually, if the other person was someone he liked, lean into with everything he had and flirt back just as hard. But something about the soft quirk of Scott's lips and the gleam in his gemstone eyes made Jimmy's thoughts short circuit.

"You gave me a flower. We're married now," repeated Scott. "That's how it works, you know."

"Oh," was all Jimmy managed to get out. He was fairly certain that wasn't how marriage worked, despite his missing memories, but the crystalline notes of Scott's ringing laughter eroded any desire Jimmy had to challenge the declaration.

And anyway, it was just a bit. Surely.

Scott seemed to be completely serious about teaming up, at least, and Jimmy was eager to prove himself a good ally who could carry his weight without being a burden. That was why he opted to build his own little house on the opposite side of the valley, to avoid inserting himself into Scott's space without a direct invitation. He showed off his work proudly, but the way Scott's ears dropped when he saw it had Jimmy second-guessing himself.

"Sorry. I'm not a very good builder," he said as he twisted his hands uncertainly. "I know you like things to be all cute and everything. I tried my best, but - "

Scott cocked his head to one side and seemed almost perplexed as he watched Jimmy stumble over his words. Then some realization or another that Jimmy couldn't work out crossed his face, and he smiled in that way that always sent Jimmy's stomach into somersaults.

"I do like cute things. That's why you're around." He giggled at Jimmy's immediate flush. "It's a good start, really! Do you mind if I...?"

Jimmy breathed a sigh of relief. Maybe he had only imagined the disappointment in Scott's eyes earlier. "Not at all, go ahead! What's mine is yours."

"Oh? I'll keep that in mind." Amusement sparkled in Scott's eyes, assuring Jimmy that his next words were only meant to tease, not be taken seriously. "It will soothe the disappointment that my husband doesn't want to live in the same house as me."

"...What?" squeaked Jimmy. He squeaked a lot around Scott, he was beginning to realize. "Wait, that's what you were upset about?"

Scott laughed.

- }{ -

By the time Jimmy returned, both the face of his cliffside hut and the flower valley as a whole sported significant improvements. Scott was kneeling by a campfire near the lakeshore, stirring a pot of something that smelled amazing. His ears twitched almost imperceptibly at Jimmy's approach, and he looked up to greet him with that smile that sent Jimmy's stomach into somersaults.

His stomach went into a lot of somersaults around Scott, he was beginning to realize.

"I thought we'd have dinner out here, meet in the middle so to speak. If that's okay with you." Scott turned his attention back to the stew.

Jimmy grinned. "Yeah, 'course it is. Just let me put everything away." He emptied his inventory of all the resources he'd gathered on his trip out, then joined Scott by the fire. "What all's in there, anyway?"

"Mostly vegetables." Scott lifted the wooden spoon he was stirring with, both to show Jimmy the chunk of carrot that rested on it and to test the tenderness of the vegetable against the wall of the pot. "Our first harvest of carrots and potatoes, and some odds and ends I foraged from the woods. I did add some of the chicken you prepared earlier, to make it a little more hearty."

He set aside the spoon and picked up a ladle instead, filling a bowl and passing it to Jimmy before filling his own. Jimmy accepted it gratefully, taking a tentative sip of the hot broth before picking up one of the two smaller spoons that waited nearby. "Oh, that's delicious - wait, did you carve all these dishes today?"

Scott seemed pleased that Jimmy had noticed. Jimmy would notice every detail he could if it meant that smile would stay on those pretty lips. "I did," said Scott. "I finished my building projects earlier than I expected, so I thought I might as well start on some easy comforts."

"Oh my gosh, that's impressive! Is there anything you're not good at?"

Scott's ears twitched happily. "Oh, very little," he said smugly, and Jimmy laughed.

There wasn't much in the way of conversation at first. Jimmy's focus was on the stew, the day's hard work of gathering logs and stone and ores having made him ravenous. Scott was similarly focused on refueling after all the hours spent building. But as food and silence both settled, the slightly awkward small talk between them strengthened into something easy and comfortable. They told each other what little they could about themselves, information drawn from either their limited memories or gut feelings, and theorized about what they couldn't recall.

"Do you think we're anyone important in our home worlds?" Jimmy asked. He stared up at the first stars that faded into existence as the sky slowly dimmed. "I get the feeling that some of the others are, you know? Like Etho, or Martyn. They just feel so...big. Like there's no way they aren't someone."

Scott was laying next to him in the grass. The inches between their shoulders felt ever so close and oh so far all at the same time. "I don't think I am. Or rather, I hope I'm not. Being known by strangers sounds...exhausting. I just want a quiet little life with someone I care about."

Jimmy smiled. "That sounds nice. I don't think I'm anyone important either. But you're right; being nobody sounds like the way to go." He turned his head to look at Scott. "You know, we never did proper introductions. Hi, I'm Jimmy. I'm nobody."

Scott turned his head to look at Jimmy with a soft smile. "Hi Jimmy. I'm Scott. I'm nobody, too."

Jimmy laughed.

- }{ -

No one on the server knew quite what to make of their situation. Fourteen people, dropped into an unknown world, with no memory of the lives they surely must have been leading before and only the knowledge that they had agreed to partake in some sort of game. They were all vaguely aware that there were rules that would be revised with death, knew three deaths would be the end, and had a strong suspicion that some of them must have known at least some of the others before. But beyond that, they were almost as much a mystery to themselves as they were to one another.

Jimmy had his own strong suspicion that Scott was the sort to be just as mysterious in his regular life. He wasn't quite sure what to make of the...elf? fae? Jimmy didn't know exactly what he was, and Scott only smiled and deflected the question when Jimmy asked.

Neither man avoided the rest of the server entirely, but decided early on that they preferred to keep to themselves for the most part, unwilling to get too involved with the growing tensions between other factions. With a strong wall erected around their little valley and most of the resources they needed within, it was easy to forget that there was more to the situation than living the quiet little life Scott had admitted to dreaming of.

It was easy to forget, too, that they weren't really married. Scott still jokingly referred to Jimmy as his husband, even in front of the others, and seemed perpetually amused by Jimmy's variety of flustered reactions whenever he did.

Jimmy might not have been certain of much, but he knew beyond doubt that he was utterly enchanted by his basemate. The first time Scott leaned over and kissed Jimmy's cheek, Jimmy's thoughts crashed so hard that he barely heard Scott ask (with difficulty concealing his delight) if he was all right.

"Fine! I'm perfectly fine," he managed to squeak out. "Was just - thinking! About the, um, the thing. The thing that needs, uh, repaired right? I'll...go do that now."

"Right, the thing," repeated Scott, eyes sparkling. Jimmy wondered if they shone just as brightly in whatever color they were naturally, whether they were the green they were now or some other shade. "Best get to it before sunset."

- }{ -

It took Jimmy another three days to work up the courage to ask Scott for another kiss. He wasn't even planning on it at the time, but they were sitting shoulder to shoulder on the lakeshore when a stray petal drifted down from the clifftop and landed in Jimmy's hair.

Scott leaned in and reached up to pluck it away. "Trying a new accessory?" he said with a grin. His voice was low and his breath was warm, and Jimmy found that all of a sudden desire outweighed anxiety.

"Can I kiss you?"

Scott's eyes widened in surprise, then his mouth curved into that soft, soft smile. "Of course. You don't really have to ask to kiss your own husband, you know."

Jimmy let out a breathless chuckle. "You're still sticking to your little joke, huh?"

Scott's ears dropped, and Jimmy's heart dropped with them when he saw hurt clouding his pretty eyes. "You thought I was joking about that?"

"Well...yeah?" Jimmy tilted his head in confusion. "I mean, you said it literally within the first, like, hour of meeting. We barely know one another, Scott."

"Oh." Scott pulled away. Jimmy was struck with the desire to pull him close and assure him he didn't mean it. "I'm sorry. I mean, I know we're not married married, but you never said anything against it, and I thought you liked me back, so I just sort of...assumed."

"Assumed what?" This wasn't going at all how Jimmy had pictured it. "And I do like you! I just didn't want to, you know, take things at face value and look like an idiot later if it turned out I misinterpreted what you meant." He paused. "Which...okay, in hindsight - "

If the delicate bell-shaped flowers that dotted the ground in the woods could actually ring, Jimmy imagined they would sound an awful lot like Scott's laughter.

"So you do like me?" Scott's ears were beginning to perk back up, albeit cautiously. "You're not mad that I assumed we were dating?"

"I mean, I wish you would have said something? But no, I'm not mad." Heat blossomed across his cheeks. "So...about that kiss?"

Scott leaned in but paused at the last moment, letting Jimmy be the one to close the gap. Jimmy leaned in too, and the longing feeling in his chest that he hadn't even known was there disappeared.

Logically, Jimmy knew it couldn't possibly be his first kiss. The jitters he felt had more to do with kissing someone new for the first time, not the act of kissing itself. But was it the first time he had ever kissed Scott? It didn't seem probable that they even knew each other in the outside world, let alone were romantically involved, and yet...

Scott deepened the kiss, melting into Jimmy when Jimmy put his arms around him. The way their mouths moved together felt like the most natural thing in the world. One ear twitched in - surprise? delight? Jimmy had learned quickly how to read Scott's subtle body language, but some microexpressions were still beyond him - when Jimmy was the one to take initiative and run his tongue along Scott's lower lip, and he let him in immediately.

By the time they parted to pant for air, Jimmy had lowered Scott down into the soft grass, and the way Scott stared up at him with swollen lips and gentle surrender in his eyes stole Jimmy's breath away as quickly as he could catch it.

"I don't want this to be over."

The confession that slipped out of Jimmy startled both of them. Then Scott's confusion gave way to amusement, and he laughed. "Well, I don't exactly plan on giving you up any time soon."

"No, I mean - " Jimmy sighed and rested his forehead against Scott's. "What happens at...at the end? I know what happens when you die in a typical hardcore world, but..."

But nothing about their situation was typical. And even in a typical world, the same fear lurked in the background of every player's mind: what if something goes wrong? what if my eyes don't open again like they're meant to? what if this is actually final? Jimmy had been trying not to think about it, but being dropped into a strange game with no memory was unsettling enough, and only magnified those natural fears.

They might be the players, but something else was toying with them.

"I think we'll respawn wherever we're meant to be," said Scott firmly. "Whatever block has been placed on our memories will be gone, we'll be safe at home - wherever 'home' is - and we'll have new friends to contact. Or old friends to check up on," he added, threading his fingers through Jimmy's hair.

Jimmy nosed against his cheek, then lay next to him with a sigh. "You think we know each other on the outside?"

Scott snorted. "Jimmy, either we already knew each other before this, or we have what is quite possibly the most insane and immediate chemistry that has ever existed between two people." He mirrored the way Jimmy lay on his side, tucking a hand under his head. "You...feel like home. It's hard to imagine I came from a life where I didn't already love you."

Jimmy smiled. "Home?" he repeated, feeling a sliver of hope for what could be.

"Home," said Scott, and it sounded like a promise.

- }{ -

"I mean, you don't have to use it or anything." Jimmy pressed his fingertips together nervously. "It's not very well-made, actually. It's only holding together because Impulse helped me with all the fiddly bits."

Scott stared at the hand-cranked beater he held, turning it over and inspecting it. Jimmy shifted nervously. A few days before, Scott had lamented the lack of much nicer kitchen appliances found on more established servers, wishing aloud for even the simplicity of an electric mixer to make his baking easier. A bundle of twigs made a sufficient enough whisk for eggs, but not so much for making a smooth, creamy frosting to top the variety of little cakes he liked to bake.

"I did wonder what you were spending so long at the anvil for the other day." Scott tapped a finger against the metal of the beater. "I love it. Thank you."

Jimmy beamed, pleased with the pleased expression on Scott's face and even happier with the kiss that followed. "My husband is so talented," said Scott, resting his forehead against Jimmy's. "Is there anything you're not good at?"

"Quite a lot, actually," said Jimmy with a sheepish grin, and Scott laughed.

Scott made a cake that very night, informing Jimmy with delight that the beater did indeed make a significant difference to the texture of the frosting he'd previously been mixing with only a wooden spoon. Privately, Jimmy couldn't tell much of a difference, but he kept that thought to himself. He was more interested in the way Scott offered a scoop of frosting on his fingertip for Jimmy to taste, and the way Scott's breath caught when Jimmy gripped his wrist firmly and took his time licking away the creamy glaze.

"It's delicious." Jimmy didn't intend the low, deep tone that his voice took on, but he took great interest in the way Scott swallowed hard, parted his lips, and leaned closer. It would be easy to tease him, but it would be even easier to lean in and kiss him.

"Don't you have a cake to frost?" he murmured against Scott's lips when Scott went for a second kiss almost right away.

"It still needs to cool," Scott murmured back. Not one to be denied, he mouthed at Jimmy's jawline and down his neck, and it was Jimmy's to flush and lean closer. "Could take hours, really."

Jimmy chuckled breathlessly. "Hours, huh? Well, you're the expert. What do we do in the meantime?"

Scott smiled against his neck. Jimmy's heart pounded in his chest.

He was so caught up in imagining the possibilities of what Scott might say next that it took him a moment to realize what was happening when Scott stepped back, smiling ever so sweetly, and handed him a pile of dishes to be washed.

- }{ -

"What's on your mind?"

Jimmy jumped as Scott nudged him with his shoulder. "Oh! Gosh, you startled me. Sorry, what did you say?"

Scott's lips were quirked upwards and he kept his tone light, but the crease of his brow betrayed his concern. "You've been a million miles away all day. What's wrong?"

"Oh. Nothing's wrong. I just..." Jimmy looked down at the blade laying across his lap and gave it another polish. "Some of the others think this is all going to turn into a proper war."

"Hmm." Scott looked out over the water. The sun that shone down on them was warm, but not overly so. Dragonflies flitted around the reeds. A little frog sat quietly in the mud shaded by a rock. A bluejay watched them from the top of the wall, silent.

Jimmy polished a freshly sharpened sword. Two sets of armor hung by the anvil, gleaming with newly applied enchantments. The potions chest next to Scott's brewing stand was crowded.

"What if - "

Scott put a hand over Jimmy's. "We'll be okay. We're just a couple of nobodies, remember?" He slipped the sword from Jimmy's grasp and set it off to the side, replacing it with his own fingers. Jimmy held on like he'd been handed a lifeline he was afraid to let go of.

He looked around at the beautiful oasis he and Scott had created together. He looked at Scott, so graceful he could easily be mistaken for some ethereal spirit who lived among the flowers.

Perhaps he was. Perhaps Scott had always been here, part of this valley of eternal summer, and only Jimmy was the outsider.

Jimmy didn't care anymore about the world before, he realized. Sure, he was a little curious, but had everything he needed here. He had a home, rustic but comfortable, with plenty of room to improve over time. He had friends, some of whom - like Martyn and BigB - even felt like he'd known for years.

He had Scott.

Nothing, in this world or any other, could fill his heart the way Scott did.

"Jimmy?"

Scott squeezed his hand. Jimmy swallowed against the emotions creeping up his throat.

There was a poppy in his inventory, picked only this morning and stored away until Jimmy could figure out the best time to present it. But realizing his heart was certain in an uncertain world, it didn't seem like there would be a better time than right now.

Scott blinked at the flower Jimmy handed him, but took it without hesitation. "We're married now," said Jimmy, and Scott's eyes shot back up to meet his own. Jimmy grinned. "I gave you a flower. We're married now. That's how it works, right?"

"Oh," was all Scott managed to get out. Then his arms were around Jimmy's neck, and his mouth was crashing against Jimmy's mouth, and it really didn't matter anymore what the rest of the factions outside the wall were or weren't planning.

Jimmy smiled as Scott grinned at him behind the delicate petals of the flower he held to his nose, and they both laughed.

- }{ -

"What's on your mind?"

One of Scott's ears flicked toward Jimmy at the sound of his voice, but he didn't take his eyes off the nearly complete flower crown in his hands. "Just trying to decide how many more roses I want in this."

Jimmy tucked in the end of the last stem on his own flower crown and placed it on Scott's head. "It's not very nice to lie to your husband, you know."

Scott chuckled, but Jimmy could hear the reservation lurking in the melodious notes. Jimmy cupped his cheek, and Scott leaned into the touch and closed his eyes. "I love you."

"I love you too." Jimmy pressed his lips to Scott's forehead. "Why do you sound so sad about it? You're not breaking up with me, are you?"

He meant it as a joke, but the way Scott looked at him sent his stomach plummeting.

"No, of course not." Jimmy breathed a sigh of relief, and Scott gave him an apologetic smile. "But seeing Scar turn red, it made me think about what's coming. What happens when this is all over."

"Didn't we already talk about this?" Jimmy kissed Scott's forehead, then the bridge of his nose, then under his eye. "We outlive everyone, and enjoy being nobodies together. Easy."

Scott's eyes were soft as he watched Jimmy. "Yeah. Easy." He finished weaving the flowers he still clutched, then crowned Jimmy with them. "But let's say something happens and we respawn back in our old lives. Would you...still want me?"

"Yes."

Jimmy answered without hesitation, not needing to think about it. He already had thought about, late at night staring at the ceiling and listening to Scott's steady breathing next to him. He knew this couldn't last forever, as badly as he wanted it to. But he and Scott could.

"I want to marry you for real," he said softly. "Maybe we can find a cleric somewhere, or maybe Ren could do it. Kings can do that sort of thing, right?"

Scott laughed. "You know what? Why don't we do it? Think about it; clerics and kings officiate marriages because they represent a higher authority. But the only authority I care to recognize is yours and mine."

"I like the sound of that." Jimmy kissed Scott's hand. If he'd ever been to any weddings, he couldn't remember them, but he could recall some vague approximation of what must be standard vows. "I promise to cherish you forever and stand by your side, for better or for worse, from one dream to the next."

Under a veil of sunshine and poppies, Scott smiled at his husband. "I promise to cherish you forever and stand by your side," he repeated. "For better or for worse, from one dream to the next."

The vows were simple, the kiss was chaste, and the only witnesses were butterflies and birds. But it was theirs, and it was beautiful. In a peaceful valley in one little corner of a strange world, two nobodies grinned at one another under the delicate petals of the flowers in their hair, and they both laughed.

[simblorbo-bracket]

Pinned Post

(this post will be edited as needed throughout the tournament)

Welcome to the simblr blorbo sexyman bracket

We are currently in round: Round 2

Other tags: round 1, all active polls, all finished polls

About/Rules under the cut (please read!)

This blog and bracket are both being run by @ssspringroll (aka @exculis)

Propaganda and additional images can still be submitted, and will be included in the next round of polls from when it was sent in. You can also send in propaganda for other people's sims, as long as its positive! No negative propaganda!

Feel free to send it in through the ask box, or however else you'd like

What is a simblr?

A Sims Tumblr. We blog about sims. You don't need to have a blog dedicated to sims in order to enter or participate. If you just like voting on things, you don't even need to know what a sim is! All are welcome to vote as they please.

What is a blorbo?

In our use case, a blorbo is a sim you really like that is either your original creation, an EA/Maxis premade, your makeover of an EA/Maxis premade, or a sim born in-game from some combination of the above categories.

You may not submit other people's creations.

What is a sexyman?

A sexyman can be any gender under the sun. They should, ideally, be sexy. But you can use your own best judgement if, for example, the competitors are not a gender you think of as sexy, or if you don't think of any sims as sexy at all. In that case, you may modify your definition of sexyman to be the one that is the most fashionable, or has the best vibe, etc.

Bracket??

This is a tournament-style competition (for fun!)

There will be multiple rounds, in each round two competitors will fight for votes in a tumblr poll lasting 1 week. The winners of each poll will move on to the next round, fighting another foe in the same sort of battle.

Depending on the number of entries the tourney may be short or quite long. If the number is on the lower side, there may be a loser's bracket, wherein the losers of each poll will have a chance to redeem themselves, and fight their way back to a chance at the crown.

This is NOT a popularity contest.

While no one can control how you vote except you, you are encouraged not to just vote for the simmer you like more or to only vote for your friends. Instead, try to vote with your heart. Maybe you'll discover a new favorite?

NO Negativity

We are here to celebrate everyone's sexy sexy blorbos, not to put anyone down for any reason. This includes yourself. It will not be tolerated. No guilt trips, self-deprecation, or negative propaganda. Let's all be chill and be friends, okay?

[carolmunson]

baby, as if (the flashbacks)

the flashbacks: part one. baby as if: masterlist (read with caution.) i looked at that poll and i said 'absolutley not, you'll take what i give you.' jk, but i realized it'll just be easier for me if i take this a few chunks at a time, so i give you the beginning of 'the flashbacks'. here, you'll see eight, six, and five and a half years ago. a little entry way into how reader and (not so) f!boy eddie met and started getting involved. tw: 18+, oral (f recieving), not much in terms of tws for this entry, discussions of drugs and drug dealing -- otherwise pretty fluffy. our timeframe setting starts out in 2007-ish. (take all actual year timelines with a grain of salt, i just like incorporating the early aughts into shit.) but here we go, i give you the beginning of baby as if: the flashbacks.

8 Years Ago You didn't really know each other when he started working at the shop. Your dad had mentioned 'my daughter' in passing, but you didn't go to Hawkins High or middle, you went to the highschool in the next town over using your aunts address because it was a better school. Your parents didn't want you to end up stuck like them, but you'd already beaten them by not getting pregnant at nineteen. He knew you went to college in Fort Wayne to study English -- he thought that was stupid since you spoke English already. Why would you have to spend all that money to study it? That didn't make sense to him.

He did know your little brother, Beau, often found small and sugar high at the end of a long day at kindergarten being dropped at the shop by your mom so she could take more clients at night in the salon. Eddie would take the morning shift on cars and then the afternoon shift as a baby sitter until the shop closed at 5:30. He'd take that time to teach him how to read -- but only the best books. He started with the Hobbit and went from there.

On one particular hot summer night, your mom didn't come by to drop off your brother which made sense since it was the summertime -- but he still heard the pitter patter of his light up sneakers against the concrete floor.

"Beau, don't run please!"

He hadn't heard that voice before, it wasn't nearly as nicotine soaked as your mom's or your aunt's. Eddie feels the slam of a tiny skull against his mid thigh and looks down to see Beau looking up at him with his big baby eyes.

"Hi," Beau says -- breathless in the way little kids are when they run or take a big gulp of water. He reaches up at him with his arms over his head, "I didn't wanna go home yet so I asked sissy if she could take me here after camp."

"Sissy?" Eddie asks with a quirk of his brow, hoisting him up onto his hip, "You're gettin' big dude, I don't know if I can keep pickin' you up."

"My sissy," he says, pointing over to the office your dad normally spent the afternoons in, but there you were right outside of it. Summer sun soaked, shorts tight over your thighs, run down sneakers and an old weathered sweatshirt completed your look. Eddie gulped at the sight of you but you were too preoccupied with your phone to pay attention.

"Mumma, can you tell Eddie about the dragon I saw at the zoo?" Beau asked, shimmying down Eddie's body to get back down on the floor to run to you.

"Okay kid, is she your sister or is she your mom?" Eddie asked, trying to hide confusion and surprised. You look up at him with a gaze that immediately makes him feel stupid, but intruiged.

"Ew, no, I'm definitely his sister," you answer while snapping your phone closed, hand falling onto Beau's head, "Can you guess which one of us was the mistake?"

Your playful grin makes him laugh, "Sorry, he called you mom so -- I just didn't know."

"Don't worry -- it's sorta like when you accidentally call your teacher 'mom' when you're a kid. He just gets confused," you shrug and introduce yourself before asking, "What's your name?"

"I'm Eddie. I uh --"

"Oh! You watch Beau when he's out of school!" you interrupt, "He talks about you all the time."

"You're not telling him about the dragon, sissy," Beau whines and squirms, "I seen a dragon today."

"You saw a dragon today, B," Eddie corrects, "I saw, not I seen."

"Still seen one," Beau crosses and uncrosses his arms with a dramatic eye roll, already bored with the conversation enough to scurry over to another co-worker.

"He saw a bearded dragon lizard at the zoo today," you smile.

"I swear he's five going on fifteen with all that attitude," Eddie says with an exasperated sigh through puffed out cheeks, "Gives me a run for my money..."

You laugh a little out of your nose and flip your phone open, he's stunned at how fast you text. Your thumbs flying over the keyboard of your Sidekick iD. All he had was some Nokia burner from Rick and an iPod he stole at the gym.

"Uh, your dad's in there, by the way. Like, you can just go in," he says. His coverall feels too hot and scratchy, noticibly concious of how much is pools around his sinewy frame. He doesn't look like a man the way the other guys who work here do, he doesn't really feel like one either. Too soft. Too gentle. Even when he was lugging around tires and getting into fights at The Hideout.

"He's on the phone," you scrunch your nose while you point at the door, keys in your hand jingling. He thinks about what you'd do if he reached forward and tapped his finger on it. If he traced down the bridge gently. You look so touchable.

"How come I've never seen you around before? I've been here like, almost a year," he says, running the rag that was over his shoulder through his hands to occupy himself.

"I'm not around a lot, normally in Fort Wayne 'cause I go to school there. I stay with a friend and work at the school over the summer to make some money," you explain, "Trying to save up for my own place."

"Oh, cool," he nods, swallowing the disappointment in his tone. Of course you don't want to stick around this shit hole town. You have better things to do. You're literally in college.

"What's your SN? I'll add you to my buddy list and tell you all the weird shit Beau says this weekend," you giggle.

"What's an SN?" Eddie asks, throat running dry. Is this some kind of joke? Are you trying to make fun of him or something? "SN? Your screen name?" you reply, cocking your head when he still doesn't know what you mean, "Like your AIM screen name?"

"Oh!" he says, embarrassment continuing to creep up on him, "Like, on the computer? We um -- I don't have one at home so I never really signed up for it."

"Oh," you say softly, nodding, "Um, well like, what's your number then? Gotta keep up with Beau's replacement older sibling."

He internally gags when you refer to him as your replacement. Did you already put him in that catergory? The friendzone? That's what they called it at the comic book store when they had their D&D nights and just talked about girls.

"Here," you say, handing the phone out to him with the 'New Contact' page up. He takes it, albiet shakily, unsure if Rick would want him to be giving out his number to just anyone -- but you're so cute and girls never ask for his number. Not even after they hook up with him in his van outside of the bar. Rick would understand.

"Thanks, it's saved under Eddie M," he replies sheepishly, "In case you know any other Eddies."

"I don't," you smile, "But I'll keep the M."

The door to the office opens and your dad appears, tired and disheveled but glad to see you.

"Hey kid, where's the gremlin?" he asks you gruffly.

"I don't know, probably doing something illegal," you shrug, but the pitter patter of light up sneakers on concrete starts up again across the garage.

"Let's go, buddy," he says while Beau leaps up into his arms.

"That was a big jump dude. What, are you half spider monkey or something?" Eddie teases.

"We saw them at the zoo, today!" he calls out, before turning to his dad, "And I also saw a dragon."

"That's very cool, you'll have to draw me a picture when we get home," he says with a nod before putting his attention on Eddie.

"I'm gonna head out, but are you good to lock up here with Mark?"

"Yeah, for sure," Eddie nods. A smile spreads across his lips, maybe you'll think he's important or something, "It was um...it was nice to meet you."

"Nice to meet you, too," you say softly while you head toward the door with your dad. He tries not to look, but there's something about the way your cut off shorts hug your ass that has heat rushing to his cheeks.

You turn back as the door is about to close behind you and grin, "I was the mistake, by the way. I'll shoot you a text after nine!"

You do text him after nine.

'heyyy. how r u? :)'

No one ever really asks.

Six Years Ago

He didn't mean to fall for you, but how could he not? Your weekly to bi-weekly phone calls during your senior year of college were all he looked forward to. Outside of pay day and parties at Rick's. And D&D campaigns. And shows at The Hideout. You were up there, you were top ten. He swore it. 

He knew when you came home for winter break last year, helping your parents bring Beau to swimming lessons and indoor soccer. It started with small, yearning, glances when your daddy would invite him home for dinner, or you'd drop off lunch for the guys. Soft little flicks of brown eyes from under envious full lashes to watch you watching him, leaning over his work bench to ask him a question for your dad. Watching you live your life in your family’s small house while he ate brisket and showed Beau how to do shading in his coloring books. He nearly died when you grabbed his hand in the kitchen, manicured nails dancing over the new burnished silver jewelry on his fingers and asked, ‘Are these new rings? Where’d you get them?’ 

He'd survey you while you helped your brother with his math homework when your mom was busy with her fourth haircut that night -- your aunt who wouldn't pay her and your dad too burnt out to do anything but drink in front of the TV in his recliner. 

"Oh, no, that's not right," Eddie pipes up gently. You looked up at the sound of his words, sitting across the kitchen table while you stood over your brother's shoulder. 

Eddie blushes, scrunching into his shoulders, "Sorry, sorry, it's just, you're a little off -- when you're converting ounces to pounds you--" 

"I don't need you to teach him about grams, ounces, and pounds, Munson," you say softly, a little giggle escaping your chest. He flushes deeper than before, "I think he's a little young for that." Everyone knew what Eddie did on the side, it didn’t take much to find out what he always had hidden away in his beat up backpack. Your daddy said that it taught him good entrepreneurial skills and as long as he wasn’t getting into trouble or selling to kids, he was fine to work at the shop until the cops came knocking – and they never did. 

"Sorry, I just -- Just because it says 5 doesn't mean it's a half pound. 5 ounces isn't a half pound, it's like a 'gotcha' question," he explains. Your brother's eyes are glued to Eddie, his cool rings and long hair, his leather jacket, the soft stubble on his chin. Eddie was the coolest guy your brother had ever met, so if it meant he had to learn weight conversion from a drug dealer, then so be it. He'd listen to him before he’d listen to you. 

"How many ounces are in a pound, bud?" he asks. 

"Sixteen," your brother replies. 

"What's half of sixteen?" 

"Eight." 

"You're so sharp, dude," Ed encourages, "You should skip second grade, for real."

"So even though it says point five, it's actually eight ounces? Not five ounces?" your brother asks, pencil tracing over the question on his work sheet. 

"Exactly," Eddie grins, "See, you get it." 

He meets your eyes for your approval and when you nod, running a hand over your little brother's head comfortingly, he has to hide the giddiness on his face in his hands. 

"How come Eddie's good at math and you're not?" your brother asks. You laugh, Eddie's snort comes out from behind his hands, dancing through his silver rings. 

"I haven't taken a math class in a while, Eddie does math every day," you say, like a kindergarten teacher trying to explain bomb drills. 

"How come?" 

"Oh, um," you look at Eddie, his flushed cheeks and boyish smile, "He's just -- Eddie's really smart."

You stayed out in Fort Wayne for six months after graduation until your mom got let go at the salon. 'Making room for new talent', they'd said. She'd developed joint pain, recurring carpal tunnel -- she couldn't do as much as she used to. So, like every good first born, you moved back home to help out -- taking whatever job you could find. At first it felt bad to be back in your childhood bedroom, forced back into the mundanity of the world around you. The embarrassment of running into people you knew at the mall or getting gas. But at least one thing was fine, you got to see Eddie -- and he was kind of exciting. Way more exciting than your job at the diner you picked up back in May. It worked out fine, you guess. You'd have mornings off some days to take Beau to school and to soccer, or baseball, or whatever sport he was into that season. Your mom would do hair in the kitchen for the older ladies -- roller sets, perms, colors. She could take her time with them, they had no rush. Then you'd leave for the diner when Beau came home and your mama would take more clients in the evening. Your daddy would be home at five thirty to take on the heat. 

Things were easier on your parents when Eddie started coming around to keep Beau occupied. The second grader had a lot of energy, even after sports practice or game days. Eddie's personality matched his in intensity -- always finding new ways to keep him engaged in his homework, in his reading, in the way he navigated the world. Beau was at a fourth grade reading level by the end of the school year and whipping through math like he was born to know it. Your daddy started taking Eddie to boxing matches and monster truck shows with Beau. Your daddy started to forget you were there, too. 

Except when Eddie’s big brown eyes started to linger a little too long at you one night when you were at work.

“Munson, I’m old. I’m not stupid,” your dad’s voice grumbles like a bad engine when he talks, “You wanna ask my daughter on a date, don’t you?” 

Eddie sputters into his orange soda, smattering it onto Beau who throws into a fit of giggles. 

“Uh – what?” he gasps, “Sir, I – excuse me?” 

“I see how you’ve been lookin’ at her since you saw her two summers ago,” he shakes his head, coughing a cigarette cough into his fist, “You’ve got the most love sick eyes I’ve ever seen.” 

Eddie can’t help the blush that grows in his cheeks, “Sir, I dunno about that.”  “Everyone knows you have a huge crush on sissy, Ed,” Beau says matter of factly, taking a big gulp of his chocolate milk. Ed reaches for the cup as he goes for a second gulp and eases it out of his hands. “Slow down, kid,” he huffs, “And gross, dude. Girls have cooties.” 

“Sissy has her cooties shot,” Beau shrugged, “She told me when I said there’s no way you liked her, ‘cause girls have cooties.” “Did sissy ask if I told you I liked her?” Eddie asks with a smile. Beau smirks and giggles, tiny teeth shining back at his dad – he’s a troublemaker but he’s no good at keeping secrets. Your dad smirks into his coffee mug, too.

“Did she ask you if I liked her?” Eddie’s heart pounds in his chest when your dad nods at his question. 

“Did um – did she say if she liked me?” he stammers out. He pressed his tongue to the roof of his mouth to squeeze out any remaining moisture as he saw you walk out of the kitchen to one of your tables. Two regulars, construction guys -- Bryan and Charlie, always come in at the same time and always tip big cause they think you're pretty. Eddie hates that he hates when you talk about them -- you aren't his, it shouldn't make him so upset. He smiles to himself for a minute when you press a hand to your lower back, scrunching your face in pain. He can tell it’s because you always pop your hip to one side when you take an order. 

“She might’ve mentioned something,” your dad shrugs, “But I asked you a question, kid.” 

The sticky heat from outside flows in through the door and into his chest, “Am I allowed to ask her on a date?” 

“She’s twenny-two, she can do what she wants,” he laughs, “Just don’t have her coming home in a cop car and you got my blessing.” 

“I promise I won’t have her come home in a cop car,” he breathes out. His excitement outweighs his embarrassment when you come over to the table. To him, your diner dress fits you just right. To you and your dad, you wished it was a little looser. He swallows hard when you plop your hands on the linoleum and lean forward on your palms. Your manicured nails click on the plastic when you drum them a few times, the pen in your hand shines.

“Anything else I can get you boys?” you ask with a smile. 

“I think we’re heading out, pum’kin,” your dad’s jagged grin shines through his eyes while Beau crawls over Eddie to get out of the booth, “Gotta take this rugrat to the movies for his friend’s birthday party.” 

“But um,” your dad chuckles while he stands up, stretching a bit before adjusting his biker vest, “I think Ed’s gonna stick around. Said he had somethin’ to ask you.” 

Five and ½ Years Ago Money flows when he makes it. Your first date was to the movies, nervous hand holds on your knee – uncertain arm around your shoulder. He smelled like Suave body wash and cigarettes. Your second to some restaurant out of town, he stumbled over his drink order and yours but it made you giggle in a way that made him giggle too. He wore a ‘nice’ shirt that Wayne let him borrow but he shifted in it all night – rolling up the sleeves and opening up the collar. Some chicken scratch tattoos on his forearms. He kissed you in the van with warm full lips and smiled all the way home. But as the months went on and Rick started giving him bigger plays, bigger bricks to move – two years in the trenches had his seeing stacks he had only dreamed of before. You got to reap the benefits. A pair of earrings, nicer dinners, paying for your manicures every now and again. New tattoos on his arms, on his chest, littered in them – good ones too, he’d go out to Ohio for them. He’d work his shifts at the garage with your dad and then on some nights and weekends do his business. Your daddy still looked the other way, if the cops weren’t knocking then it didn’t matter. Eddie was making you happy, he was making everyone happy, so there wasn’t any reason for him to worry. You spent your shifts at the diner thinking about when he’d come pick you up. Thinking about when he’d come in during your opening shifts and flirt with you while he had a cup of coffee – sometimes in his coveralls, sometimes in his clothes from the night before. He smelled good, new colognes – he got a couple. You liked the one he wore on date nights and loved the one he wore during the day. Got some silver chains to match his rings – subtle upgrades. He’d started to fill out some – making more money, eating more, more muscle, more cash, more confidence – still yours. Still lovesick. ‘The most lovesick eyes I’ve ever seen.’  

His hair tickled your thighs while he had you splayed out on the mattress in Rick’s guest room, the ‘welcome to the weekend’ party still raging down stairs as the night begins to approach the early hours of the morning. Perks of living on the outskirts of town – no neighbors to call the cops to tell you to shut the fuck up. The thud of the music makes the walls vibrate, putting you in a steady trance in the dark. The joints you were passed earlier had made their claim, body languid and floaty — he could have you just how he wants you. 

“Fuck, you taste so good,” he whispers into the crease of your thigh while his hands push your knees apart further. His tongue is his best feature, and he knows it now. Easily his strongest muscle with the way it’s started to get him in and out of anything. Sweet charm turned as silver as his rings as he got more and more successful, more and more of Rick’s approval. His tongue lies flat in slow intentional drags between your legs, spit pooling out in its wake. He likes to take his time here to build you up, your soft ‘hm’s encouraging him to keep his pace.

“It’s nice like that, huh?” he asks gently, pressing a kiss to your clit, “Using my tongue on you?”

“Yeah,” you breathe out, eyes closed and sleepy. His head pokes up from between your legs when he notices your body reacting less and less to his mouth. Your sounds get progressively quieter, losing enthusiasm.

“Hey, you okay?” he asks, crawling up over you. 

“Mhm,” you respond, eyes still shut. 

“You fallin’ asleep on me?” he laughs, thumb coming up to run over the side of your head, “You little lightweight.” 

Your lips stretch into a smile, the weight of your high pressing you further into the mattress. Each time you take a breath you feel yourself falling further and further away, it’s almost scary until it's not – because he’s there. You feel the pad of his index finger run down the bridge of your nose and slide over your bottom lip. He quietly eases off the bed, grabbing your panties and jeans from the floor to put them back on with the finesse of a person who’s had to redress their passed out friends many times before. You’re almost out like a light when he drapes the throw blanket over your legs, adjusting it to slouch messily over your shoulders. You barely feel the kiss he leaves on your forehead. 

“I love you,” he whispers, before heading back down stairs for a drink. You wake up to the music still blaring downstairs, mouth dry and disoriented – realizing that what woke you up is the sound of the door opening. 

“Hey sleepy, didn’t mean to wake you,” Eddie whispers, wincing a bit as the music gets louder. He closes the door with his hip, clicking on the overhead light making you both squint, “Well, technically I did, but I didn’t mean to wake you up like this. I brought you some food, baby.” Heat rushes to your face at the name. Baby. No one had ever called you that before. Not other hookups or boyfriends - always ‘babe’, never ‘baby’. Always ‘babe’, never ‘angel’, never ‘sweetheart’, never ‘my girl’. Eddie called you every sweet name he could think of. “Thank you,” you smile, eyes falling on the ringed hand cradling a paper plate with two slices of pizza, dripping in grease. The other held a can of Pepsi that he watched your eyes fall on for a brief moment.

“They didn’t have Coke, m’sorry,” he scrunches his nose, leaning in to give you a kiss while he places the plate and can on the side table, clicking on the lamp. 

“That’s okay, this is fine,” you smile, he smiles back while clicking the big light back off. He crawls onto the bed next to you, the warmth of him enveloping you in his scent, his body heat, his essence. Things moved fast since your first date. You’d never felt loved like this, you’d never been kissed how he kissed you. It’s like he wrote the schematics for your body and kept them a secret until the day you let him touch you in the back of his van. The day you let him take you in your bedroom when your parents went to watch Beau’s baseball game. Even his stare made you flustered. Eddie would say the same about you. Gareth and Jeff would label it as lovedrunk, Rick said he was more addicted to being with you than he was to making him money. Sandra at the diner said he’s obsessed. Obsessed with you. It had a nice ring to it. 

“Thank you again,” you nod, cracking open the can of Pepsi that soothes your dry mouth instantly. 

“Anything for you,” he smiles while his hand reaches to yours, pressing a kiss to your knuckles.

“I heard what you said, by the way,” you smirk, “When you left the room.” 

His face somehow blanches and fumes red like sweet cherries at the same time, “You weren’t supposed to.” 

“Didn’t want me to know that you love me?” you tease, shoulder bumping him with a laugh. He doesn’t laugh back, he just looks at you with soft eyes – big and brown, begging. 

“Is that stupid?” he asks softly, disappointment weighing heavy on his tongue. 

“No! No! It’s not stupid,” you quickly assure, “No, I um –” You smile down into the can of Pepsi, manicured nails on your opposite hand drumming on the aluminum. “I love you, too,” you whisper, “I was nervous that maybe it was too soon. I didn’t like…I didn’t wanna scare you.” “Scared by my girl saying she loves me? Nah,” he shakes his head, teeth gleaming in a smile that hurts his cheeks, “That’s the best shit I’ve heard all year.” “Why don’t you eat first,” he starts huskily, taking your Pepsi can and placing it on the side table. The cologne on his skin had mixed pleasantly with tobacco, enveloping you in sandalwood, fruit, and smoke. His lips were plush as he pressed first against the corner of your mouth and then the other, holding his index finger in the center of yours. He nuzzled your nose gently before easing himself into a deep kiss, index finger tracing down your cheek. “As I was saying,” he starts again, a light giggle floating out of his chest and escaping pink cheeks, “Why don’t you eat first and then maybe we can go to mine and I’ll show you how much I love you.” “What about Wayne?” you ask, looking at his distorted face with your foreheads so close together. He steals a quick kiss from you again, another on your cheek. “Wayne’s staying close to the plant to do a morning shift, so he won’t be home until tomorrow night,” he grins, “We can play house all day tomorrow.” 

“You’re stupid,” you laugh, leaning back to take the pizza off the side table to take a bite. “What? You don’t wanna be my baby all day?” he gets on his knees on the mattress to lean into you, lips finding their way to your cheek and jaw. You squirm under his touch, a feather light gasp coming out of your mouth when he nips at the spot at the top of your neck. “What’s got you so flustered, hm?” he teases into your ear, his ringed hand trailing up your thigh. Your hand covers his and he stops his journey, pulling back a little. “Nothing bad, s’just – I really like it when you call me baby,” you hide your face with one hand, “I don’t think I’ve said that before. It’s just really nice.”  “Baby,” he pours out like warm syrup, it sounds so natural in his nicotine soaked voice. He pulls your hand away, smattering slow soft kisses across your cheeks. Mumbling between each one, “Baby, baby, baby.”

[technitango]

How was DPR in concert bby? Not once but TWICE!!!

It was amaaaaazing!!!!!!! More details under the cut (warning for rare techi selfies le gasp)

So I went to both the Oakland and LA stop. I flew in the day of the Oakland concert, which was on a Friday, my flight left at like 5:30 am. Then I landed around 8, dropped my bag off at the hotel, and went straight to the line!

I even dressed up a bit, I wore the same outfit both days, and it was a cute outfit, if I dare say so myself haha.

I showed up around 9 am and there were probably a little over 30 people there. I was going solo to the Oakland concert, but thankfully I met some super nice fellow dreamers who were my line buddies and made the time pass as fast as it could.

(It's getting harder and harder for me to stand in line that long, especially in the sun 😅).

I had early entry tickets but this meant we only got let into the venue 15 mins early, so around 6:45 that night.

I actually got an amazing spot though, only like 4 rows back from barrier!

The view was great, and the show was awesome. The crowd in Oakland was so loud and hype.

DPR Artics set in particular was one of my faves, it was like a rave, with electronic music and tons of pretty flashing lights. I danced my ass off it was such a vibe!

Of course Ian was the highlight for me, I love his music and him so much, I definitely got emotional both concerts. My favorite part about concerts is just getting lost in the music. He had a live band for his songs, which really made everything that much better!

The bass at the end of Calico is so good live T_T

The next concert was in LA, and me and a friend had meet & greet tickets that day!

I flew into LA Sunday morning and went straight to the line again at like 8 am this time oh boy. I was feeling pretty exhausted but thankfully I had a friend there to help the time pass!

The meet & greet was a group picture with DPR and ten fans each. It went by super fast but after the picture we got to shake their hands and say something really quick. I wanted to say something meaningful to Ian but all I managed when I held his hand was to say "I love you so much." 😂 I went to say more but he said I looked really beautiful and it made my brain short circuit so that was a bit embarrassing. I will in fact be running off the "you look beautiful" comment from him for the rest of my life though.

Anyway, the LA concert was also super hype, so much energy and loud! I had so much fun all my discomfort went away during the concert and I partied hard. I paid for it afterward but that's okay haha.

DPR is amazing live, they are funny, enigamtic, and put their all into it. I cannot recommend seeing them live enough if you have the chance!

Thats my recap of events, please take this little clip from the LA concert of Ian performing Bad Cold as a gift. The Bad Cold choreo was so fun 😂

[beelmons]

It's actually safer to kiss

'I don't do handshakes' was something you had heard repeatedly since your first day at the BAU. The ever so quirky Spencer Reid and his little, often statistic-based, habits.

Most of them you found endearing, granted, it was mostly because you had this massive, teenage-like crush on him, but some of them like his germophobe tendencies were nothing short to insane.

"So, you have only given out three handshakes in your entire life?" you said out loud, a glass with your favorite beverage hanging from your fingers.

The two of you were at a gathering at Rossi's place, but this specific one, being that was because of his birthday, had added people into the mix, resulting in both of you getting too crowded to actually hangout outside where everyone else was.

"Two of them were against my will, actually, my mother forced me to give them out" he answered, his lips curled into a light smile. He himself knew the thing was silly, but he had convinced himself otherwise, he firmly believed his decision to be unfounded.

"But you hug us very often, is it not the same?" you asked curiously, your body leaning lightly forward to pay close attention to his answer.

"No, no it's not." he started, his hands joining into the conversation as he tried to graphically describe a germ with his fingers "See, if you hug me, your germ-filled hands land on my clothes, and eventually I'm going to clean them-"

"Eventually?" you interrupted with a light scoff.

"Yes!" he laughed "Listen, so if you hold my hand, I'm ten times more likely to touch my face or lips, and therefore create a entry pathway for the germs."

"And that whole 'It's actually safer to kiss'" charade is real?" you asked once more.

"Oh, yes, it's real, while the mouth is often nasty, it holds less germs and foreign germs than the hands." he kept going on about that.

Your head popped off with an idea. You weren't sure if it was just you feeling bold or whatnot, but you decided to put his little theory to test.

"Roleplay with me for a second." you asked as you bolted off your chair "I want you to hear how ridiculous that line sounds." you added, walking a couple of steps back. "I'm gonna pretend not to know you, and I want you to say it exactly like you said it to that man, but listen to yourself, really listen, Reid, okay?"

He had broken into laughter as soon as you got off your seat, his head shaking in disbelief. He was as smitten for you as you were for him, but of course, none of you would actually admit it to each other.

"Hi! Doctor Reid, it's nice to meet you" with your extended hand in his direction.

"Uh, I don't do handshakes" He started "The number of pathogens passed during a handshake is staggering. It's actually safer to ki-"

He couldn't even finish the sentence before your lips were on his. He was astounded for a second before he melted into your grip, your hands lightly tracing over his scalp as your tongues danced together.

To hell was this safer, it was actually very, very dangerous.

His hands landed on your hips, his legs opening side to side as he remained seated on the chair, welcoming your body forward.

The clearing of a throat was what finally reminded you that you were, in fact, in the middle of a party with every single one of your coworkers around you. It was Rossi, standing right next to you. You quickly pulled apart and looked with eyes wide open.

"This is not-" you tried to explain, but the man raised his hands to silence you.

"Down the hall far corner to the right," he started, walking past you to grab a bottle of fine wine. "And kids," he added as he started heading back to the part "Please put the bedsheets in the washing mashine when you're done."

[tootoomanycats]

I'm so happy to be working on this short story (10 chapters)

Just Desserts is an idea I had a while back (post here), and honestly, it grew into something really beautiful. As much as I avoid it, I genuinely do enjoy writing angsty scenes. So please enjoy this teaser that I wrote while listening to this on repeat. (hits play again) K thanks I love you buh bye!

Levi forced himself up the steps to your apartment, pushing through excruciating pain in his knee as his heart pounded so violently it rattled deep in his ear drums. You wouldn't have left without saying anything. You wouldn't do that to him… unless…

Dread set in, and vision began to tunnel, darkness dancing on the edges as he started skipping steps. The cane fell out of his hands, clattering down before skirting across the ground below; it didn't matter. He had to get to your apartment; you had to be there still, and he had to apologize. Had to tell you the truth.

“FUCK!” He cried out when his left leg refused to lift, unable to clear the top step, body crumbling like a marionette on the small landing that led to the apartment door. He crawled, dragging as he gritted through the sharp pain that ricocheted each vertebra before knocking on the door from where he lay—listening for a moment, hoping to hear the shuffle of footsteps that never came.

He called your name.

No response.

“No.” He pulled himself to stand on shaking limbs, hands gripping the door for balance as he called out your name, knocking louder this time.

Silence.

“No, no, no, no.” The words came out in a hushed panic as he turned the doorknob; it was unlocked.

Just as he went to limp into the doorway, a white envelope caught his eye. Laying on the ground, staring back up at him, his name written in the delicate cursive he knew to be your handwriting. Dryness wrapped around his throat like barbed wire. Slowly sliding down against the door, he grasped the envelope and broke its wax seal. Hands shaking as the contents within were pulled out and unfolded. There were so many, many pages. Each with a different date.

“Are these…diary pages?”

October 12th.

I have never been so embarrassed. I mistook him for a child when he had been so kind to help me with my keys. To add insult to injury, he is the tea shop owner across the way. I don’t know how I’ll ever live this down.

That was the first day you met. He flipped through the more recent pages until he found a freshly torn page with no date, only his name. The ink was still fresh and smugged in certain places—small wet spots littered across, making a few letters hard to understand.

Levi,

You're right.

I’m a coward.

I’m sorry.

“Idiot,” He murmured as he held the torn pages in his hands, looking up to see that the apartment had been cleaned and what little you did have was gone. The tea plant he gifted you that once sat in the window was missing; only an imprint of where the terracotta bottom sat proved that it was once there. The cat toys that usually litter the floor were gone, as was Louie. With how little you had, it was difficult to tell if leaving was preplanned or done in haste.

Turning back to the pages in hand, he read through each entry. Dates skipped, and with the pages torn, it wasn't hard to put together that you had ripped out every entry that had to do with him.

November 11th.

He wanted to kiss me.

Fear grabbed my stomach, and like a coward, I fiend to be oblivious and went home. I wish I had been brave; why can’t I be brave? When I told Martha, I expected her to joke about it, but she just looked sad and hugged me. She told me it was okay. I didn't even know I had started crying until I was struggling to breathe.

He could hear his teeth grinding as he clenched his jaw. Every page spelled out in black and white how much you cared and how scared you were. And he had goaded you for it, shouted at you angrily when you were finally brave enough to try and tell him, as awkward as it was. "What have I done?"

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