#^ totally hasnt put way too much thought into this

[roseworth]

okay id like to say im sorry in advance for this but i want to talk about my headcanon of rose having a glass eye.

first of all i have canon basis for this since in deathstroke inc #1 there was a flashback to her cutting her eye out. but she still has two eyes. probably not intentional but idc im taking it as true.

now i think she would have 3 reasons for using a glass eye: number one being that its a very clear blindspot and a weakness that can be exploited, and she doesnt like showing any weak spots so she finds a way to cover it up. number two is that she doesnt want to be like deathstroke, and having white hair and an eyepatch is basically an immediate deathstroke identifier.

however i can argue against both of those reasons (her blind eye isnt a blind spot because of her precog + enhanced senses, and if she didnt want to be clocked as deathstroke adjacent the first step would be taking off his mask rather than getting a new eye) SO. my third & favorite reason is that shes trying to extend an olive branch to slade. she doesnt want to address the things that hes done to her and shes still desperate for a family, so she gets a fake eye so that slade can look at her without remembering their past. shes trying to bury everything that happened as far down as she can because its easier for her to pretend that it didnt than to acknowledge that it did. and she wants a family bad enough that shes willing to try to forget everything

but im also gonna take that a step further and say that SLADE was the one that gave her the glass eye. hes also trying to cover up the past, and doesnt want to think about the shitty things hes done, so he gives her a glass eye because he thinks that'll make her forgive him. hes not changing what hes doing now and hes not apologizing for what happened before, but hes trying to get both of them to leave it behind. and since a glass eye is the only gift that her father gives her, rose takes it and uses it because she takes anything that slade deigns to give her.

and another reason that fucks me up is because theres a line about slade that says something along the lines of "he has a clear blind spot, but hes good enough that he projects that weakness and still wins." (and i wish i could fucking remember what issue thats from. i promise ill come back here and add a screenshot if i remember) SO part of him giving her a glass eye is him not believing that shes good enough to project weakness. which i think would fuck her up given that all she wants is his approval

anyways thats my pitch for why i believe shes secretly had a glass eye this whole time. i dont think she would've told anyone because she KNOWS that having a fake eye that her dad gave her to put a bandaid over the past is bad for her. but she will take what he gives her and implant it into her skull since its a tangible representation of her fathers attention

[bossbutch]

halfway thru chapter 1 of umineko. idk how meaningful it is to speculate this early, The Real Umineko hasnt even properly started. these arent fully thought out and organized it's just scattered thoughts

battler's gender politics are entertainingly weird. he's like "when i meet a woman, even if she's my cousin or my servant, i NEED to make a big show of grabbing her tits so that she can hit me and everyone will laugh at the Classic Gag and it'll lighten the mood" which is just ridiculous enough to be something a rich teenager in the 80s could convince himself is okay. and then he sees the dinner seating and he's like "damn my family's so patriarchal. thought gained: inexplicable feminist agenda". i'm assuming this is a genre deconstruction thing. also lol that he is right next to maria in grandpa's tier list

maria is awesome btw i hope she gets to infodump about magic a lot more. some goon in the SA thread said the umineko author was once a social worker, so like. even if they don't use the word because it's japan in the 80s she's gotta be Intended as autistic

kinzo's room is so telegraphed to be a locked room mystery. he's entertaining too but i kinda zone out when he's talking about how his magic system works. i get the basic of more risk = more magic power but i worry it's the kind of thing that has Important Clues that my brain autofills with [arcane rambling]

battler constantly gasses up how good george is with kids and then george sees a family member repeatedly hitting their 9 year old disabled child and says, out loud, "not my problem"

assuming the epitaph is a puzzle intended to be solved and not the kind of puzzle that frames all the other puzzles and isn't solvable til the end: until the first butterfly i thought all the death and traveling was metaphorical. it still could be. like the six chosen by the key could be objects. the hands of a clock may be involved because that's in all the promo stuff and chapter start art. kinzo acted like the riddle was totally solvable by the doc or kanon or any of his kids. but if it was unsolvable until People Started Dying, it seems kinda pointless to have put the painting up years ago? but beatrice is a Dramatic Bitch.

Who Took The Rose?! no idea, but i'm sure it's important. if there's a 19th person, definitely them. totally possible the wrapper fell off but they'd still recognize the withered rose i reckon

Who Gave Maria The Umbrella?! again, if there's a 19th person, it's them. if not, natsuhi was my prime suspect because her alibi didn't have any witnesses but everyone else's did (if you really count grandpa and the doctor, like doc could easily say "i was with kinzo" and no one would verify that with kinzo). but then there was a scene right after from natsuhi's pov (migraine and can't sleep without meds, literally me) where she speculates who did it. so either the narrative is heavily fucking with me, it's gramps or the doctor, or it's someone with an accomplice

the narration is from battler's pov except when it's not and it's strange. it even isn't from his pov in some scenes that he's in, like the letter reading scene. this is the type of thing that could Mean Something way later but is just a little confusing sometimes right now

kyrie saying there's a contradiction in beatrice showing herself to maria but hiding from everyone else, failing to consider beatrice may be a Dramatic Bitch. i think there's probably a 19th person even if they are not necessarily a witch with magic powers

the furniture being totally able to break promises but can't disobey orders is the kind of exact words semantic sillies that umineko memes made me expect

goes w/o saying that the way the servants are treated is supremely fucked up. going to servant school and then working in the mansion at age six... george proposing to a girl that he has so much power over is lol. it's nice that umineko cares who the servants are and why they're there, and other logistical human things like how kinzo made his money and what they're all doing with it

at midnight, where was the doctor?

they drop some hints that the non-shannon, non-krauss bodies have their faces disfigured and Could be other people but that is pretty ridiculous and there's no reasons to consider that yet

i wish the LP used the doughy original art but that's the price i pay for convenience

[simpfordemetri]

can you do volturi x gen z reader? like how they react to how reader uses slang and stuff, thank you🤭

Im a total fan of Twilight x Gen z reader but i never find anything so i totally love this question

Alec

He doesnt understand anything,at first he even perceive you as childish and naive,all those jokes,the bad language oh god

When he started to met you he had a bit of a problem with your short clothes and all

Wanting to party while you are in a relationship with him?Uhmmm

No,thats not happening not on his sight im sorry

Jane

He hated you

(Still do)

Why you do dumb self drepress jokes?She thought you were suicidal tbh

Most of you “gen z language” has to be explained to her because most of the time you talk to her she feels like its another language she hasnt learn yet

As Alec,im sorry but there is no parties,not less to say,all that short clothes,tank tops and shorts,she is getting riden of them

Demetri

He was scared of you,thought you had too much energy and he really cant follow you life style

Wont let you uses bad language,if you do he will deathly stare at you

However he is the only one that is willing to go party with you,you read right,he goes with you because there is no way he is letting you put that mini dress on and let you go all alone without him

Felix

He absolutely adores you

Not only because you are his mate ,he never got to knew someone like you

He finds your jokes hilarious and cant get enough of them

Not too fun of the short clothes but is okay with it ,just…hope that nobady dares to look at you

[transfemzedaph]

idea that definitely hasnt been living in my brain:

joel totally, 100%, does NOT have a massive crush on zedaph. zedaph, who he's heard a lot of things about but, but nothing could've prepared him for how blummin' cute he is, for goodness sake-- what. what? don't look at him like that. it's nothing. shut up.

(hope u like this even if u dont write smth for it DJBDJD)

i fucking loved this ask so much <3. i transed joel & zeds genders. bc im me. also the end is meh & i dont know what grians base looks like and i do not care

-

Of course Joel had heard about Zedaph, how could they not have. There was the rest of ZITS in the life series, Skizz specifically when he found out the both of them were joining, and of course Grians run down of all of the hermits. The basic gist of it was she's weird in a cool way and makes creative and useless but fun machines, which honestly, Joel thought sounded really awesome. Redstone was fine and all but they did tend to think most redstoners were way too serious about the whole thing.

So when Joel was invited over to be the first person to test Zeds newest thing, they were excited!

What none of any of his friends had told them, was how flippin cute she was. And yeah maybe Joel ended up stumbling over their words more than usual whilst hanging out, and yeah maybe they were a little bit distracted from the game? activity? workout? whatever it was, Joel was a bit distracted because they kept watching Zed.

Joel rushes their goodbyes and runs off back home, laying face down on the floor of their newly built home, void they should have put some furniture in already.

Grian wanders over and lets out a little snort at the sight of Joel, who just groans and rolls over, propping themself up a bit,

"This is all your fault."

Grian just stares.

Joel locks eyes with him face scrunching, "You didn't tell me she was cute."

Grian, promptly bursts out laughing.

"Gri, no, this isn't funny. This is serious. And she's gonna think I'm an idiot now and it's all your fault!"

Grian's still laughing.

Joel sits then self up and crosses their arms indignantly, "Are you done?"

Grian's giggling a bit when he replies, "You've got it so bad! For a blonde! Again! You have a type sooo bad."

Joel kicks their leg out towards Grian, grumbling slightly, "Yeah well, you're blonde but you're ugly and I hate you. So there."

Grian sits himself down next to Joel, bumping their shoulder with his own as he does.

"Honestly I bet Zed loved hanging out with you. Don't worry yeah? And at least next time you can compose yourself before you hang out."

Joel leans their head on Grians shoulder.

"Yeah." They sigh, picking at their fingernails, before mumbling "Think 'm just overthinking it cause of being new 'n all that. Just dont wanna make anyone hate me."

Grian scoffs, "No one is going to hate you, and you know Skizz, and probably Tango and Impulse as well, have all talked to Zed about you? Why do you think she invited you to hang out?"

Joel hums.

"To me it seems like she was also trying to impress you too, showing off what she made?"

Joel blushes, halfheartedly giving Grian a little shove, "Shut up."

-

It's a couple of days later when Joel barges into Grians house, "I have an excuse to go visit Zed!"

Grian sighs, "And you had to come and tell me about this? Right now?"

Joel takes in the scene, Mumbo, standing next to a coffee machine, his moustache looking very lackluster, Grian almost curled up on his stool, hands clasped around a mug.

Joel winces, "Uh, what time is it?"

"Too early for this nonsense, shoo." Grian lazily waves one hand in Joels general direction to usher them away.

Joel grumbles to themself as they walk away, "Whatever, Grian doesn't get to know my really cool and awesome plan of going over and saying that we need to beat Impulse and Tangos high score without being a bit cheaty like they were. Which is the best plan ever."

[waterlogged-detective]

hello i am asking about how horrible darcy is <3

HI THANK U

So I’m gonna make a short list of things he does/has done that are awful and morally reprehensible since i dont have the brain to prose rn:

Obligitory disclaimer that Darcy started life as an edgy creepypasta oc when i was like 17 so even if this stuff isnt as bad as it could be, he used to be cringier.

Before the Fall Darcy was a resurrectionist who not only stole bodies from cemeteries indiscriminately, but he also burked at least a couple people. To clarify: yes some of it was for legitimate research purposes but a lot of it was because he got bored and he likes taking things apart. There is no deeper meaning to this he’s just a pos.

After the Fall Darcy took it upon himself to not only figure out the anatomy of those already in the Neath (rubberies, colonists, etc. words out on devils but he probably hasnt risked it tbh) but to see exactly how much someone could be taken apart before they *actually* died permanently. Like the exact point at which a person would stop coming back.

In that vein he also decided to see how much damage it would take to tomb colonistify someone (usually putting them out of their misery afterwards because he didnt want his name to be too bad in the colonies).

He did not care if these people were awake and conscious at any point during any of these proceedurea, as long as they didn’t move around too much or get annoyingly noisy he didn’t bother to send them back to the boatman.

He also sometimes doesn’t even attempt to justify the reasoning behind a dissection, he just got bored. Like half of the things in jars are from totally healthy people (prior to Darcy being himself) and the others are from things he thought looked interesting.

He is not sharing any of the research he’s been doing with Anybody which takes away from the even thin veneer of doing something for the sake of someone else. This is total self interest. It may not have started that way, but it is *now*.

He also does not have a moral problem with ANYTHING the Masters have done or will do. He simply doesn’t care, or in some cases (like finding out about jack of smiles) he finds it absolutely hilarious.

To a lesser crime as well: in universes where Jon is human and inevitably starts seeking he has no issues with anything that entails either. He’d *help* the process, just to see what would happen. He thinks its being a supportive husband but it’s going to end Jon 100%

He also thinks cannibalism is morally okay, but never would engage in it himself due to being a vegetarian. This is less a crime and more something I just personally find funny.

There’s definitely more but these are some of the Crimes (tm). Darcy stopped being morally grey a long long time ago, and he can’t even entirely blame it on dying. He was a horrible human being and is thus a horrible corpse

[sunfudge]

\\HEADS UP 4.2 SPOILERS TO ANYONE WHO HASNT DONE IT

I have to agree with your stance on the AQ. I almost fooled myself into thinking it wasn’t good when the reality was I thought it was amazing but having to see so much grief throughout the quest knocked me out (in a good way). From the first 10 minutes where it was completely reasonable to see Navia break down after staying strong in front of the victims of the sudden flood, and her final bittersweet goodbye to Silver and Melus - wow. I’ve seen people deal with grief and if anything Navia was so damn strong for keeping it together. I’d be bawling for days girl like huh. And if you think about it, with how Fontaine has a strong theme of deception (like everyone is hiding something about themselves), isn’t it refreshing to have Navia who is so incredibly genuine and earnest with her intentions and her want to help everyone? I love her a lot.

Then we were hit with the gradual masking of Furina?

Like - we almost had her open up but then it was revealed we were in the Opera house. This was made worse later on when the traveller saw her inner dialogue during that moment was “surely I’m allowed to put myself first for the first time in 400 years?”. As the human side of Focalor, Furina was absolutely outstanding and selfless. Ohhh my God and the way Furina thinks of her suffering as a kind of “price” or sacrifice to pay for saving Fontaine? Direct contrast to earlier dialogue about how Silver and Melus should not be seen as a mere prices?? FURINA YOU’VE DONE SO MUCH MY LOVE

As much as it pains me that we didn’t get to see her at the end of the AQ to check on her, I guess it makes sense? If you were performing for 400 years and you finally get a chance to crawl away from watchful eyes like you wanted, I think it’s reasonable to just. Want to go away for a bit. But God I really really wish her all the best with finally being allowed to live as herself and not as someone else.

There’s so much to talk about I can’t condense it all. Even small details like a random audience member saying “wait, the death sentence? Isn’t that too harsh? Her only sin was making us!” made my heart clench. Furina begging her people to believe her because she is terrified that they will drown since her facade has been the only thing keeping the flood at bay. AND she will blame herself for not doing enough. Neuvi going “after 500 years, you think I would have the heart to proclaim them as guilty?” Focalor’s goodbye to Furina being “you can now live as a human like I always wished we could.” OUGHHH

Anyway. Wow. I just,,, yeah. I really really liked the quest in all honesty. I needed a good cry and I got it. To each their own opinion, and everyone has a right to not like things in the game. But personally to me this was fantastic.

I'm so glad you sent me this because I'm about to totally lose it about the archon quest in this reply.

Below are further spoilers for the 4.2 archon quest

I totally agree with you on the grief thing, and upon reflection and sleeping on it I think the fact I did this quest all in one continuous sitting over the course of hours added to my previous mixed feelings, just because it was SO MUCH sadness in such a short space of time that it kinda made me associate the quest with feelings of sorrow.

Had I completed the archon quests in parts, having gone away and came back to it later, I feel I'd have handled it better, but I can't stop myself from doing archon quests in one sitting, it's in my DNA to complete them all at once LOL

Navia's bit at the start... Oh it had been about 20 minutes into me playing and I was crying buckets. Full on sobbing.

I play in English and when I tell you her voice actress had RENT DUE because her crying, her voice, everything just broke my heart I literally was like okay great it's not even been half an hour and I'm broken for her, what the fuck.

As soon as I saw Silver and Melus weren't with her I teared up cause I was like they're dead, aren't they? And then I just kept crying anytime they were brought up, and then when they saved her from the primordial sea :(

Navia is a very good character, I love her, she's so authentic and genuine and strong it's made me wanna pull with her purely to spoil her because it's what she deserves.

On to Furina, my heart has ACHED for her since we found out the truth.

I always loved her, and I always thought she did have some sort of plan ever since she reacted with such anger to Arlecchino's insinuation that she was ignoring the prophecy and doing nothing. It was raw real anger from Furina which of course we now understand. It contrasted so harshly with what the game was showing us her acting like, plus Neuvi saying that she is 'taking the prophecy very seriously', that made me go 'we do not know the whole truth', and I was right but FUCK it was in a way I'd never have been able to predict.

WHEN I REALIZED WE HAD TRANSPORTED HER TO THE OPERA HOUSE I STARTED CRYING AGAIN I wanted to wrap her in a blanket and protect her. I totally understand why the trial took place, from the perspective of the other characters there is an impending doomsday that will wipe out the entirety of Fontaine's population, from their perspective it made sense and was justified because they weren't hearing Furina's thoughts and thought crucial information pertaining to the prophecy was being withheld from them, both them and Furina had the shared goal of protecting Fontaine - but that didn't mean that whole section didn't hurt like Hell to complete.

She thought her world was falling apart, after so many years of dedicating herself entirely to this role in order to save her nation she thought it was ALL over and those 146848 scenes (WHICH btw when it changed to THAT number of scenes I was BAWLING, what a hard hitting way to show her continuous suffering in a way that's so impactful) were for nothing.

You know I didn't even realize the Silver and Melus/Furina price thing until you just said it, oh mannnnnnn this fucking archon quest.

It's sore, but you're right - showing her at the end of the quest and us speaking with her would not have made sense. Giving her space after that made the most sense narratively but it definitely also made me feel like we had no sort of closure on her wellbeing (I'm sure her story quest gives us some of that) so that also added to my pain at the end because I was like ... The last time I saw her she was walking through the city as those people yelled 'the prophecy was wrong', and I hope she knows that the prophecy was only 'wrong' BECAUSE of what she did. The prophecy was wrong because of YOU, my love

She deserves a happy and peaceful life doing all the things she loves from now on.

Also, I presume she's mortal now? I'm sure Focalors made the point of saying her existence was what increased Furina's lifespan so like - now she's a whole mortal human being...

There's so many thoughts that have come from this quest.

The Oceanid reveal was so good, like you said that NPC saying her sin was making them, and now believing she'll be sentenced to death for it... Oh god.

The begging, her saying 'believe me I AM your archon' the slow descent into her crying because she believes it's all over when in reality she was FINALLY at the end, the fact she never knew when the end was coming she didn't know this was meant to happen she wasn't aware this was finally the end of her pain

Oh Neuvillette declaring the citizens of Fontaine innocent is one of my favourite moments in the entire game now.

Having had time to process it, I agree, this is one of the best stories in the game and it was told incredibly well and the whole thing was so fucking emotional I felt like I got battered after I finished it.

[caramelmochacrow]

on the surface, yuka and maika's relationship is pretty normal. older sister that loves her little sister so much, right? yeah. it's more than that (thank you again shinobu)

peaky summer story was the first story that made me realize yuka has so much that we dont know about. she has a sister, she loves her so much, and apparently her sister is super shy. but when we meet her, maika isnt the latter at all. she's outgoing, similar to yuka, which made me go 'what the fuck is up with yuka?'

yuka didn't lie to peaky, of course, but with that piece of info it tells SO much how she sees maika at that moment. she still sees maika as her younger self, even tho she's changed from that. this could just be because yuka hasn't seen maika in forever, true, but what if i told you that the year before the event she visited maika and maika just hasnt sent letters? THAT changes so much. maika could've easily changed in a year, that too is true, but with the way maika acts it seems she's been outgoing and such for a while. yuka still can't unsee the little sister that didn't have confidence in herself in maika and it's so so interesting.

during the entire event, yuka complements her sister and keeps pointing out how cool her sister is to peaky, which they find endearing but also a bit weird. when yuka leaves to get drinks, maika tells kyoko, esora and shinobu that she had terrible confidence when she was younger and yuka is the reason she managed to build her confidence up. she always celebrated every single thing maika did, to the point she forgot training her body. maika knew what yuka was doing, but she (and yuka, deep down) knew it wasn't good. yuka was literally forgetting to take care of herself so maika decided to go to america so she can have a a fresh start and also let yuka not think about trying to make herself look bad. it worked, maika succeeded in finding confidence in herself and yuka managed to not think about her sister's insecurities (much).

with that, now comes the volleyball scene. yuka purposely makes herself look bad, she makes herself be terrible and stops when peaky notices. she's still thinking about maika's insecurities w her abilities. they tell her that maika might know what she's doing already, similar to them and they (kyoko specifically) tells her that she should move on from seeing maika as her younger self. maika has changed, she's grown up. she's done a good job of raising her self confidence (maika's present self shows this change) but now yuka needs to be a good role model. how will maika know what is right if her sister isnt even doing the right thing because she wants maika to feel better? she's putting herself down so maika can look good, which isn't the right thing to do. that mindset will ruin the confidence that maika (and yuka) has worked so hard to build.

so yuka decides that yeah, it is a bad thing to do, destroying everything she worked hard to build and should be proud of how much maika has grown. and you see that right after. she goes full throttle with her power and when she destroys maika and her friend (kris btw) in volleyball. instead of being discouraged, it causes maika to ask for a rematch, telling her sister that she was just warming up.

the event is really cute right? yayyy. (i totally dont see myself in maika--) this is when everything changes.

her relations event with shinobu. it changed my entire perception of yuka's relationship with maika. i talked abt my thoughts in depth in my post abt the event but to summarize:

to shinobu, yuka is a genius because she can do so many things, but just because she's good at everything doesnt mean she's not struggling. in the event, yuka doubts if she should cut off one of the things she loves to be able to properly focus on it. but if she loves all of those things she shouldnt take any of them away and decides she'll be an amazing photographer, the owner of her family's gym and peaky's vj.

i am focusing specifically on how yuka is skilled at so many things. imagine being maika. your sister is good at so many things and yet you aren't. your sister has so many futures ahead of her and you don't have any. your sister who seems to think you have those things as well when you know deep down you dont have that. but when you do things, she tells you that you're doing a good job and when she tries she isnt as good it makes you think that "im just as amazing as my cool sister!" and it's sweet.

but as time goes on, you notice that she's been hiding it all this time, she's actually just as good. she just did badly so you could look good. it hurts at first, but you realize that if you continued this any longer, your older sister will stop trying to be good. you realize that people wont understand why she's amazing and will slowly but surely put herself down so you look better. she's going to be like you, someone with no confidence in their abilities. so you decide to do it yourself and build your confidence on your own for your sake and your sister's sake.

[chaosjedimasterk]

It might an unpopular opinion but I’m chill if they throw romance into Star Wars. I’ve seen a lot of dislike of the Tech and Phee flirting lately and while I can understand not being interested in it, I think it’s trying to speak to a place we’ve seen very little of. There’s like a whole rant under the cut here about my thoughts on the season so far. I’m cool if you have different opinions I’m just throwing these into the void.

I also preface this with I am honestly pretty chill about the media I consume and general have liked most of everything Star Wars puts out. I’m here for fun and vibes.

This whole season of the Bad Batch is trying to explore who these men are without the Republic. Who they are without being soldiers. Who they are as their own men, in their own right. What choices are they going to make for themselves and Omega. What does life look like for a tool of a governing body that exists no more?

Which like, is often times what real life soldiers have to do when they’re no longer useful to their government. Like the clones being decommissioned - super realistic to how the US government treats its vets. In my opinion at least. They care about you until you’re not useful. Who are you then if you’re not a soldier?

Additionally this last episode showed us the literal foundation of Star Wars which is hope, community, and light existing in darkness. Sure shit is bleak, but if we come together and WORK together, it’s so much better than alone. The batch is used to being their own squad. They didn’t have a whole battalion like the 501st or the 212th. They were 4 to 5 dudes. They need to learn how important community is to fighting fascism . Each way someone learns is different, hunter is learning who he is through being a father figure, Crosshair is being thrown through the absolute ringer to learn this lesson, and maybe Techs is being a partner and learning nuanced social interactions? Wrecker i haven’t pinned but he’s very much protect my brothers and protect my sister.

While Phee had gotten kinda stereotypical pirate treatment, she’s one of the first black characters we’ve gotten who hasnt moved through some sort of extremest route. Yes she’s a pirate but we are getting to see a relatively soft black woman on screen. Who is warm, and kind and funny and very laid back. Who is “liberating treasures” and I think that has to speak for something too.

I could be totally wrong about this, but I’m honestly so curious to see where the writers take this show. And how they continue the tech and Phee narrative.

[smoosnoom]

Lately I've been having a hard time writing anything. I keep having ideas that I think are good then I sike myself out and go "Oh, someone else has probably already written that," which is weird, cause I'd read 500 fics of the same ship in the same coffeeshop!au and not even bat an eye. I don't care if I've read the same trope or setting or idea over and over (I like it, actually) but when I'm the one writing I feel like I have to do something totally unique and I think it's cause I'm worried of being compared to other better writers who just... write better (<- exhibit A) OR worse, accidentally plagiarize someone? Like without remembering that, oh I've already read this before this isn't an original thought at all?? But if it's an idea that hasn't been done before there's nothing to compare. Right. So. Therapy session over.

Do you ever worry about writing something that's already been written? Do you ever check AO3 tags to see if somethings been done before/too much/not enough, etc.? Or are you excited to write something that's been done and put your own spin on it?

Maybe I should do the complete opposite and find the most overpopulated tag and write that so it gets drowned in the others and then there's too many to compare! That's like.. can't beat 'em join 'em or smthin. Yeah.

UUUGH MOOON I knooooow all my ideas are unoriginal but so is everyone else's 1!! And everyone's basic and just wants to see two losers in love hold hands so I should just get over it !! Like I know this objectively but how do I make me feel it SUBJECTIVELY !!

idk, Moon. Today's just not that day u kno

ok . anon . i need u to look me in my eyes 👁👁 and please listen carefully to what im abt to say to u .

Everything Ever Has Already Been Written .

like every trope ever and every idea ever and every dynamic ever and every character ever and everything literally ever .

but uknow what hasnt been written ! these tropes ! by You !!!!!!

the way u write it is what makes it entirely unique . i absolutely worry about the things i write and if theyre even like . special in their way at all or if they even stand out in any possible manner but if u arent word-for-word copying something someone else has written, then yes !!! it will stand out !!!!! itll be something special and unique because its never been written the way u will !!!! that is literally it

so yea if u are worrying so much about the things ur writing and if theyve already been written then yes probably ! humans can only be so imaginative when it comes to tropes and stories but the way u write it and ur narration and turn of phrases and metaphors and adjective and dialogue have never been written the way u will, and thats what makes it good and great and amazing ! thats why people eat up the same au five hundred times !!!!! thats why people will eat up UR writing !!!!! ur going to do it in a way that just gets people going Oh my go d . u know what i mean ?

so yes i worry and i check and i feel absolutely terrible about it . but if i dont and i just feel great about writing Something at alll then it always turns out 1000% better because im not upset abt it ! readers can sometimes tell ur enthusiasm and passion being put into a work, and i think its best if u let it all go and write what ur heart is calling to . that by itself will make it all the special u need it to be

or dont idk im just . trying my best and sometimes it works out ! do what u want write what makes u proud eat what makes u full !!!!! and if u ever need someone to just . hit u with a hammer and let uknow that whatever ur writing is great and fantastic then I Am Here !

today has potential to get better ! tomorrow is on its way with a new beginning !!! u have me cheering u on !!!! 🥳🥳🥳🥳🥳🥳🥳 good luck !!!!!!!!!

[catholicjinx]

*poke* bsd vampire au but they’re not like the vampires rn- thoughts 👁👁🎤

OH MY GOD. SO MANY THOUGHTS

okay so. im gonna be honest the vampire thing going on in bsd rn is Not very vampire. friendly id say. ofc its altered to be from the source of an ability but the vampires being mindless and more just. controlled by bloodlust and the need to infect other people is so far off. from regular vampires. because traditionally vampires Did infect people but not so much as just. people dying and coming back as vampires. and them just needing to feed (they dont even come out every night!!! they used to be put in coffins that were specially designed to keep the vampires In and theyd. bury people alive to test if they were vampires. kinda freaky but really the story is they come out for feeding on general human energy, since Vampyres Very Traditionally were just old ancestors that came alive at night to feast on the energy of the living) so it was more 50/50 in a way? anyways. bsd vampire au

SO. im gonna do this in a bulleted list with just regular. characters. and rhe ones i favor the most rn lol

Chuuya - he wouldnt necessarily be a violent vampire but he would feel guilty about his feedings. he wouldnt need blood as often as the average vampire because of his smaller stature but i do think he would come home and immediately shower and feel awful because hes stripping himself further of humanity and like. idk. dipping into stormbringer a bit: since he Is the original chuuyas body, just hosting a god that essentially makes him half human, i think hed be obsessed with proving his humanity to himself to try and live up to what he Should Have Been. the happy boy that the flags said he was. so him becoming a vampire and being fully conscious of it would both be a Huge internal struggle and even an external one - since vampires cannot be seen in mirrors i think he would also have some body image issues! (i Know he does. Really.) but overall, he'd make the most of it. dazai would tell him his fangs are hot or whatever and itd get to him sometimes and the windows in his office would constantly have to be covered up. but he would be ok. also hed wear the SICK ASS vampire 1800s esque clothes and totally live in a gothic mansion with too many books and fireplaces. i know it.

Dazai - him turning vampire would really just. corrode his humanity even further. not only would he question if hes fulfilling odas dying wish but hed question if hes even being honest with kunikida and the rest of the agency by being a "changed man" like he claimed. his feedings probably turn into episodes, most likely having to feed once a day and feeling nothing during it but the guilt would sink in after. he would probably become something of a hermit, only letting his closest friends into his home and hiring So Much staff to take care of his mansion so he doesnt have to be seen by anyone else. his suicide attempts would probably become more drastic (and as vampires are immortal, hed only be left a lot more upset afterwards anyways). on the brighter side, some days would be better than others, and some days he wouldnt sleep in a coffin and prefer an actual Bed. and he would absolutely look like he hasnt slept in 100 years. oh and hed have duo fangs (8 fangs instead of just the traditional 4) and would probably keep heads of garlic around the house for fun. and hed grow his hair out tbh!!

Akutagawa - HE GETS ME THE MOST!!! TBH!!! HEEEEE he was the first one to get turned. for sure. and i especially think he was turned because he was bit by another vampire, his (rural town that i hc him to have grown up in despite being an orphan) buried him vampire style and put a slicer above his neck to behead him when he tried to rise. he did anyways, and since vampires are immortal, hed have a bright red scar on his neck where he was decapitated. hed feed more regularly, especially because he was sicker in the afterlife and now has to make up for it while hes undead. gin would Not be a vampire, but theyd live in a vampire mansion/cottage crossover where she takes care of him and he swears to never use her for feeding, even if he needs blood. his fangs would be small, but very sharp, and hed dress. the same way he does now lol

Atsushi - his turning was difficult. i think it wouldve happened while he was at the orphanage: he got sick, the director brought in a "doctor" to treat him but he ended up being bit and turned, and the director threw him out for behaving unlike the other kids and accused him of being possesed by. something (this also ties into my religious atsushi headcanon so stay with me here). since vampires originate out of religion, i think atsushi wouldve been Heavily raised on catholicism and both felt guilty for becoming the thing he was supposed to hate (catholics hate vampires and anything relating to the supernatural. atleast from someone who was raised in the catholic church, theyre very reserved and punish things that seem to resonate with the devil because it suggests satanism. lol.) and also would probably try to make up for it by becoming obsessive with his relationship with the trinity. ya get me. i think eventually hed accept that he was turned, but hed still feel worthless because hes doing something he deems inhumane especially through his trauma. as for appearances, hed have an interesting fang set where the bottom fangs are very short but the top are long, and i think one of his top fangs would be like a snaggletooth :3 its just very atsushi

Poe - really hed just accept it all together. his turning was ordinary and i dont have anything specific for it Yet but i do believe that he probably used it as an excuse to keep writing novels super late at night lol. also he would feed Very irregularly and itd be super unhealthy for him, so when he met ranpo he would be constantly lectured on keeping a regular feeding schedule. also hed be so scared of the sunlight hed have 100 umbrellas

Ranpo - gluttonous, got turned on accident and was terrified when he couldnt see his reflection at first but then realized he could use this to his advantage to fuck around at night whenever he wants. food isnt necessary for vampire survivial and it makes literally no difference since they straight up just absorb the blood they consume so he took So Much Advantage of this and now uses it to eat as many snacks as he wants. hes still a renown detective and participates in cases often, just from the safefy of his home. he would also have snaggleteeth and double fangs like dazai

Fukuzawa - was turned late into life and found that it didnt really make a difference, so he settled in a mansion and started an organization for vampires that dont prefer going out and feeding on people and would rather just have willing participants/premade blood without the hunting part (particularly ranpo, poe, and atsushi use this. sometimes gin too if akutagawa cant go out to feed). hes like a dad to everyone and treats his vampire staff like his own kin even though they may be scared of him. also he dresses like a 19th century goth novel protagonist. i don't make the rules

[delcakoo]

Hey koobear hyd m’love

I’m not as peppy as today coz I feel a bit ignored 🥲

I have art elective and for out first assignment we had to choose candies and hot glue them to a piece of paper in contrasting positions and that would be our realistic reference (WE GOT TO EAT SOME CANDYS MWAHAHAHAH) so yeah and I did that and I was drawing and yada yada you know drawing

And I was pretty proud of it I thought I did the details well. My art teacher, who has so many things to say about every students art piece, DIDNT say anything about mine, nothing negative. She said that I captured everything wonderfully, and for her to have no negative feedback was once in a blue moon, and I took pride into being the blue moon girl.

And so I was proud of what she said. I told my friends in my art, and showed them my art, and all they said was just… good. No “that’s really cool!” Or “wow you did well!” Just… good. When I uprooted them and old them their art was actually so pretty like their elements were chefs kiss (it actually was!!! Like v cool) though they kinda have a little bit of flaws but I wasn’t gonna put them down, they were minor anyway so I didn’t care and knew I wouldn’t appreciate if someone pointed out my minor flaws.

It’s not like I was asking for something in return… I was just hoping for some uplifting tooo… like who doesn’t like compliments.. I would’ve appreciated some too… it makes me feel so selfish idk

Ans when I showed it to my parents they also just said “mm ok” like? Like it’s my parents now and I always try so hard to at least make them a little bit proud but they just hummed ok. I worked rlly hard on it too but everyone I’ve been showing it to just says… “ok, good, cool” :( some reassurance would be nice…

Here’s my drawing if you wanna see it

But yeah anyways hyd m’love!! 💗💗🥰🥰😘😘

bruh i totally understand how you feel :((( im so sorry you had to go through that like gen.. when you give people your utmost attention n’ compliments just to receive nothing back augh it’s the worst. they don’t deserve you kuma love im gonna 👊👊💥 🙂🙂 pls dont feel guilty for feeling that way cuz its totally valid and unfair for you.. especially from your parents like..???

BUT HOLY SHIT YOUR DRAWING IS AMAZING KUMA?? YOURE SO TALENTED LIKE FR I THINK THEY WERE JUST JEALOUS OF YOU CUZ DAMN.. THE DETAILS ON THE WRAPPER BrO YOU DID SO GOOD WITH THE SHADING AS WELL..??? TEACH ME UR WAYS 🙁🙁🙏🙏💖💖💖 pls uR DRAWING LOOKS BETTER THAN THE REAL THING 🙄🙄

AND IM GOOD LOVE!! TY FOR ASKING I DIDNT DO TOO MUCH TODAY BESIDES MAKING MY FRIEND WATCH AVATAR THE LAST AIRBENDER CUZ THE UNCULTURED MF HASNT WATCHED IT.. WE R ALMOST AT BOOK 3 IM SO PROUD OF HER 🙏🙏😍😍

[motelpearl]

star trek: picard spoilers /

I'm gonna keep updating this with my thoughts (making threads is one thing I kinda miss about twitter so this will have to do)

somehow troi & riker having a weird horse girl daughter makes perfect sense like she does so much of the stuff I did at that age (making up fake countries & languages, drawing really well for her age, running around in the bush with an archery toy)

when riker showed up at the end of season one LORD JESUS I COULDVE KISSED THE SCREEN

also elnor is my son I love him. AND FUCK Q

omfg I know the modern day is near-dystopian but seeing 2024 earth not only referenced but actually depicted so starkly in comparison to the near-utopian future in star trek is so fucking bleak like UGH CAN THE FUCKING VULCANS COME TEACH US SPACE COMMUNISM ALREADY. WHERE THE REPLICATION TECHNOLOGY AT

the rick & Morty reference DID NOT AGE WELL IN MANY WAYS UGH IM GENERALLY ENJOYING THIS SHOW BUT SOME OF THE WRITING IS SO REDDIT

I hate to say it but agnes & the borg queen are the most toxic yuri in the known universe

speaking of toxic yuri I knew nothing about seven of nine going into this cause I havent watched ds9 but I fucking love her like if she & raffi ever need a third......tsahaha

ALSO WHY IS CHRIS SO DUMB IN THE 2ND SEASON. YOU WILL NEVER FUCK.

THE WAY THE 2ND SEASON RETCONS TIMES ARROW FROM TNG & THAT EPISODE IN TNG WHERE PICARD SEES A VISION OF HIS MOM & SHES OLD AS FUCK & HAS GREY HAIR & A FRENCH ACCENT BOTHERS ME GREATLY. NOT TO BE THAT KIND OF NERD OR ANYTHING.

ok nevermind him having visions of her as an old lady is explained.....except the french accent

was data the only soong who wasnt a total dickhead

"sweet picard, your guilt must've saved planets by now, countless lives in trade for the one you couldn't" SCREAMS OF AGONY

romulan with red bloodshot eyes....RED?

QCARD DIVORCE ANNULMENT 🥳🥳

ok I guess chris DID fuck sorry I wasnt familiar with his game

wow I can't believe I watched the entirety if season 2 in one night tbh everything I've heard about this show from people whose opinions i generally trust has been that its (and I quote) "laughably bad" & like ruined all of TNG for them & I was honestly scared it would ruin it for me too cause tbh I became a trekkie when i was 9/10 & a lot of bad things were going on in my life at that point & star trek was one thing that always gave me happiness & then later I got into it again during like the deep quarantine where no one was leaving their houses at all & just about everyone around me got radicalized into racist far-right fearmongering qanon shit but the idea that someday humans will be able & intelligent enough not only to put aside our own differences but to be able to befriend alien species & those aliens being willing to help humanity at one of its lowest points & someday even if it doesnt happen in my own lifetime, that people can exist who genuinely care about the needs of many & actively work to better the lives of people throughout the universe instead of just giving in to individualism & cynicism & irony poisoning which is such an easy trap to fall into gave me so much hope for humanity like yall I'm literally getting choked up typing this & I never cry & I was kind of worried that this show would stomp on everything i loved about star trek but thankfully it hasnt so far (though to be fair I like a lot of objectively bad things I mean my favourite decade of fashion is the 70s so maybe this is just jingling the metaphorical keys at me)

CRUSHERRRRRR SEASON 3 COMING OUT THE GATES SWINGING (no pun intended but im not changing it now)

ENOUGH NEEDLE DROPS I HATE TO SAY IT BUT ITS GIVING STRANGER THINGS/THE MARIO MOVIE (THOUGH IN A SLIGHTLY LESS CRINGY NOSTALGIA BAIT WAY LIKE AT LEAST THIS ISN'T USING TOP 40 SHIT FROM THE 80S) & at least it's mostly non-diegetic bc I feel like diegetic music has more of a chance of being used tastelessly

british accent is stored in the balls

its gotta be worf or at least some klingon giving raffi orders right....who else would call someone a warrior

NOOOOO THE DE-AGING CGI OR WHATEVER IN S3 E3 ITS SO UNCANNY VALLEY it was surprisingly pretty good on data in s1 & q in s2 though......where did the budget go

why is old man worf kinda *starts coughing*

amanda plummer is so terrifying in every role I've seen her in like even in catching fire when she was a protagonist

also why do so many people victim blame picard for being assimilated by the borg it's not like he wanted to get assimilated & become the face of a massacre. the whole motto of the borg is "resistance is futile" like there was literally nothing he couldve done to prevent it

jack better prove himself QUICKLY cause other than his parentage I don't see anything that would inspire me to fight for his life

& then cthulu was born

goddamn the changelings make the borg look like a bunch of peace & love flower children. on that note on that note if picard assimilated beverly's reproductive system with some fucked up latent borg sperm i will be disappointed but not surprised cause what is up with jack's crazyass visions

BLESS RO BLESS WORF BLESS RAFFI

if I weren't worried I might miss something important I'd skip all the scenes where jack monologues about benign shit for no reason BOOOO GET OFF THE STAGE

JUMPIN JIMINY

WHY IS THIS LITERALLY A HORROR MOVIE honestly the concept of beings that can make themselves look & sound human has always been one of the things that scare me the most which is weird because all my life I've been compared to robots & aliens WHICH IS ONE OF THE REASONS WHY I LIKED STAR TREK SO MUCH IN THE FIRST PLACE BECAUSE I RELATED SO MUCH TO DATA so in theory I shouldnt be afraid of that because I'm in the same predicament & I can relate in many ways but I mean idk I guess theres a difference between feeling excluded & wanting to be the ones who exclude. my fear probably comes more from the idea of unwillingly walking into a trap thinking someone you trust was going to help you & then having to wonder "what happened to the real person?"

what I meant by that long ramble is: the tuvok scene........*shudders*

would it be for for best if the borg carried out one last forceful assimilation of the changelings......could they be trusted with that capability......*strokes chin pensively*

THEYRE DOING/WILL DO THE PICARD MANEUVER IM CALLING IT NOW ok wait heres my theory they do the picard maneuver -> it looks like theres another ship but it's just like a warp imprint or whatever -> vadic tries to beam aboard the fake ship & actually beams herself into space -> the main crew beam aboard the shrike & save riker & troi & possibly take the portal weapon -> beam back to the real ship & blow the shrike up while all the crew panic cause they just watched vadic explode in space

well.

BIG DADDY WORF COME TO LAY THE SMACK DOWN GOD BLESS GOD FUCKING BLESS BRUH IMAGINE YOUR FRIEND COMES TO BREAK YOU OUT OF DEATH ROW & IMMEDIATELY STARTS FLIRTING WITH YOUR WIFE IM FUCKING DEAD

GET DATA ON THE PHONE CAN THEY NOT DELETE LORE'S WHOLE FILES LIKE WHAT CAN HE POSSIBLY CONTRIBUTE TO ADVANCEMENT OF SOCIETY

nooooo data don't misgender spot

OOOOOOOH THEY ALMOST HAD ME THERE

THEY DID BLAST THEM INTO SPACE I WAS PARTIALLY RIGHT YEEEEEEHAW

wait. are the red door & the red lady the same thing

BORG PENIS I CALLED IT

what happened to the borg using their power for good....get agnes on the phone....

hooh I knew it was coming but....enterprise d my beloved

last episode prediction: picard will have to become locutus one last time to defeat the borg & whoever else

yknow right now would be a real great time for some q or some travellers/watchers to show up & do their thing. also imagine the insane drama of wesley crusher coming to talk his long lost brother out of becoming a fascist alien king

on that note i cant decide whether assimilation is a metaphor for fascism, addiction, sexual assault, stds, something else I haven't considered, or is just a wild crazy non-allegorical concept of the kinds of things that might exist in space

JUPITER IS NOT CLASS M

one thing that keeps catching me off guard & then making me laugh is how patrick stewart's high rp shakespearean accent has slightly waned over the years so I'll sometimes be like "why did picard sound like paul mccartney there" & then I remember that patrick stewart is actually northern (yes yes i know yorkshire & liverpool are two different places but the uk is so minuscule by canadian standards that they might as well be the same and no one outside the uk can tell the difference between the accents so dont lecture me) <- yes unfortunately I'm the laziest kind of linguistics nerd as well I'm honestly just exposing myself as annoying in this post

let me guess jack is the beacon & they have to kill him

did they clone locutus

GOD I FUCKING LOVE DATA

I love troi too like when the writing gives her a chance to be shes literally so smart & so aware & in tune with everything like she's such an asset to the crew but it's rare we get to see that in action

I'm getting too good at predicting things

well now that I've finished it I can say I really dont know why I saw so much hate for it like maybe I've just operated in weird spaces of the internet but I mean I really dont see what there is to outright hate about it (I mean early on some of the characters felt very stilted like agnes in the first season was just yapping & was giving millenial cringe to the highest degree but I think by the 2nd season she redeemed herself but then was that even canon considering the 3rd season? idk I definitely have criticisms but I wouldn't call it "laughably bad" & it definitely hasnt forever ruined my view of star trek thank god)

sigh I just love these characters yall. if that's key jingling then put my ass in the crib

also I'm just going through all the seasons of tng & watching my favorite episodes & some random ones & it makes me laugh so hard when they show picard wearing anything other than his uniform cause he's always just in the sluttiest outfits ever 😭 they had patrick stewart running around in a v-neck & booty shorts

gah the best of both worlds part 1 & 2 + family work so well as like a trilogy but they're also such heartbreaking episodes like borg assimilation is one of those things that just becomes increasingly unrelentingly more & more horrifying the more you think about it & the scenario of those episodes would literally be so terrifying for anyone involved like beverly seeing the guy she's sort of in love with become the face of this genocidal fascist species but then her son is on board the enterprise & just watched his mom be sent on an away team where it was possible she might not come back or worse & also wesley having to see picard be the face of the borg & probably feeling like he just lost another father figure & like it would literally have no good outcomes for anyone cause even the borg don't want to be borg but it was forced upon them

on that note I kind of have a headcanon that the borg would have originated from like, a super technologically advanced planet's military putting cybernetic implants in all their soldiers for efficiency so they could have a hive mind & think as one & coordinate seamlessly & always be up to date on what other sectors of the military were doing & then deciding that instead of killing their enemies, they would forcibly conscript them into the military by assimilating them & by doing this they eventually took over whichever planet they originated on. eventually this wasn't enough for them so they started traveling the universe & assimilating whole planets & that's how it came to the point we see in tng & beyond

sigh they really wrote the episode hero worship for all us little weird kids who connected to data didnt they

if they really wanted to give geordi a romance with someone they couldve tried to put him with ro laren bc their dynamic in the next phase was so cute like his outgoing-ness + her aloofness & how he sort of brought her out of her shell in that episode UGH walk with me. or they couldve just made him gay which they were apparently considering but decided against? idk but I mean the man literally orders an ice coffee in the same episode where he falls in love with a girl just by watching her vlogs. how did they preemptively stereotype him before the stereotype of gay people loving ice coffee even existed (I jest) but like ugh ANYTHING EXCEPT THE PARASOCIAL INCEL SHIT THEY ALWAYS PUT HIM INTO & THEN IN THE VERY LAST EPISODE THEY SAY HE'S MARRIED TO LEAH BRAHMS LIKE NO. PLEASE. JUSTICE FOR GEORDI. END THE CHARACTER ASSASSINATION. but the future in that episode isnt even canon & thankfully in picard they never outright say who he had kids with so like in my mind they are not the product of reply-guy-ification but a normal relationship (also justice for leah brahms & whoever she was married to.) idk why i even feel so strongly about this. I guess maybe because geordi is otherwise such a good character & the very concept of him is so ahead of its time & obviously characters need to have flaws but did it have to be Those kinds of flaws specifically </3

also cardassians should not have hair idc I know people think bald aliens are too cliche but what business do reptilians have with hair how would that even evolve

[winderlylandchime]

1/3 And we are officially at the last episode of S4! I actually cant believe this ngl. Just so you know: our parents told him to leave them alone with the fake gays because they were out on a date and our uncle is now invested into the i love you scene that is supposed to happen but ‘just please don’t tell your mom, i promised her I wouldn’t feed into this shit’ so basically one thing is for sure: we are all equally scared of our mom when it comes to the show but only my brother has zero fucks about it. ‘Okay, i am ready! So this is what I need to happen: Blondie goes to Canada or whatever to surprise them, Brian tells him he loves him after he finishes the ride. And..that’s kinda all I care about’ ‘oh god, did they actually make them ride across Canada?! Id quit. GO BRIAN! I now have a weird urge to put on a silly outfit and some pride flags and ride a bike. GO BRI BRI!’ And we are at the border scene ‘wow a cop being a homophobe? Never seen that before. AW BRIAN IS BEING ALL CUTE AND SUPPORTIVE! I fucking love him’ ‘ugh HES STILL IN LA?! I THOUGHT WE WERE ON OUR WAY BACK BLONDIE! Blondie please go home because this is killing me. I need Brian and Justin back together pleaseeeee, this is ruining my mood. HE HAS A MOVIE IN THE MAKING!! Now go back to your man! NO YOU FUCKING ASS DONT CANCEL HIS FLIGHT WHAT THE FUCK IS THIS FUCKING SHIT! BLONDIE NO! HE CAN CELEBRATE WITH HIS MAN!’ And we are at the barn scene. ‘Aw Teddy, you’ll be okay without the meeting. You have Emy!’ Brian just brought the cake ‘AWWW BRIAN GOT THEM A CAKE! AWWW TO THE NOVOTNEY BRUCKNERS! AND A….band. HE DOES CARE! HE FUCKING CARES SO MUCH! This is growth baby! I am so close to him confessing his love! AND HES DANCING! YEAAAAH BABY I AM FINALLY WINNING THIS EPISODE FOR SURE!’ ‘Emmett is taking Ted to an AA meeting! AW! This finale is all about friends and love and growth! I fucking love this! Now bring me blondie back!’ And the scene where Brian falls is about to happen ‘look at Bri Bri..(repeats after Mikey) you are dude? What the fuck is up with Mike? Brian.. OH MY GOD BRIAN! IS HE OKAY?! HE BROKE WHAT?! This wouldnt happen with Blondie! So cancer AND a broken bone?!’ ‘Oh fuck she went into labor? Well fuck. I guess we will have two big events this episode. A baby and i love you’ (honestly his delusion is inspiring) ‘WHAT THE FUCK IS BRIAN DOING?! GET OFF THE FUCKING BIKE! Tell him Mike! Brian what kind of pissing contest are you in?!’ ‘WHY HASNT ANYONE TOLD JUSTIN?! JUSTIN GO HOME! I hate la. Blondie, go home your man is injured…again.. STAY?! NO. GO HOME BLONDIE. Wait what is happening?! NO NO NO NO SIX-EIGHT MONTHS?! BUT BRIAN! and who is this actor dude? FUCK THIS PLACE! Blondie go home, your man is injured!’ He is completely stressed out at the idea of Justin in LA. I am talking stressed out as if it’s happening to him. ‘Oh Ted and Emy are lost. Well shit, this would be us. He’s doing a meeting! This is why i love them as friends. I fucking love Emmett!’ ‘BRIAN IS NOT ACTUALLY RIDING THE FUCKING RIDE WITH ONE HAND. BABY COME ON! *he is sitting on the edge of the couch with his hands in his hair stressed out* Why is he doing this to himself? And to ME?! What is he trying to prove? Blondie would’ve collected his ass by now and had him in a car but nooooo he has to be in fucking LA. Fuck LA. Brian you are killing me and breaking my heart. And this fucking song doesnt help!’ And Brian starts hallucinating ‘wait..is he imagining himself.. judging him? What? BLONDIE *starts to kick his feet like a little kid* OH MY GOD HE IS IMAGINING JUSTIN CHEERING HIM ON?! OH MY FUCKING GOD YES! And Bri Bri, I am standing right there next to him! HE IS SO TOTALLY TELLING HIM HE LOVES HIM! Fucking LA ruined everything this episode. What is he trying to prove? Brian come on’

Okay please don’t tell your mom I exist because I’m legit scared of her too and I don’t want her to know about my role in encouraging this madness.

Your brother yelling at the screen during this episode is everything.

Emmett making an AA meeting for Ted always makes me cry. He really is the purest kindest soul on this show.

LA ruined everything in THIS episode? Oh god, he will not survive S5.

Also Brian with the bike helmet… it’s like hair and makeup wanted Brian to still have a hairstyle under the helmet and stuck those pieces of hair out and it totally bothers me. It’s a small pet peeve.

[sitpwgs]

Hi!!! I'm so so sorry I haven't replied! I know it's been days lol. I've been meaning to but I kept getting distracted or busy and also I've just been using Tumblr less and trying to be more productive. Never take it personally or anything..thats why I said before the back and forth replying can sometimes be hard for me having to keep up with it and I also like to take my time replying to you. I hope you don't think I forgot about you! 🩷

Haha I'm sorry I had to inform you about the back covers not matching. It is what it is but I'm also so excited to see some of the other photos. I think there is another one where she is holding an ice cream cone too, and I've seen one where she is wearing the white shirt from the pink or blue vinyl. I love that picture so much! But ya I actually connect with Rep a lot. I think that was my favorite album before Folklore cuz I love all the songs on it. But I never listen to an album if the rerecording hasnt come out...only a few songs. I made an exception for the concert when all the songs were on shuffle and rep was the only CD in my car. But usually I don't like to..so I won't know how to compare it..not that I would anyway. I did listen to 1989 before Midnights came out though cuz I wanted to hear most of her other albums. I also love Red and those would probably be my top 3. What about you? What would be some of your top albums or top songs? I probably have a good or solid top 5 I think. I know..my predictions are probably way off but that also makes it fun. I don't have many other predictions cuz I feel like it's similar to something else we already have on the album, and I don't really think there will be a ballad type song either but I'm happy to be wrong. Every vault has given me at least one or two songs i absolutely love though so I just hope that's still true and it probably will be! I'll be sure to send you all my thoughts..an exact month from now!

It is very hard for me to keep track of every show I've seen so I can't imagine how it is for you. I totally agree about the atmosphere of some shows..Rent was like that. I totally recommend the movie or cast recording though cuz I just love some of the songs a lot. But it is rock music so you might not like it as much. But if you like Tick Tick Boom, I would at least listen to it. I would probably feel the same about Newsies too cuz it seems like such a fun show. I did see Aladdin and it was fun to see a Disney show but I'm sure Newsies would still be different. There's also something so fun about seeing a show you know so well! I haven't seen a show more than once and I would really like to someday. Unless you count school shows that I was a part of in elementary school haha. But ya I can imagine..that's the point of theater really is that every show is different and each one can be special. Funny story..my mom didn't know what a thespian was the other day so I had to explain it to her..even when I said theater she thought I meant movie theater lol.

So..I actually haven't finished Theater Camp yet. That's another reason I waited to reply to but I didn't want to keep you waiting any longer! I waited to watch it with my sister and it just didn't work out. I put it on last night and ended up falling asleep. I woke up like an hour later and tried to rewatch it but fell asleep again! This is shocking to me cuz I was so excited to watch it and I'm usually never tired! But it was also 3AM. I've just been really drained lately I guess and that could be why I never replied. I've been sleeping more and sometimes that makes me more tired than staying up late. Midnight is usually afternoon for me lol. I am definitely going to watch it tonight though but I'm glad you liked it! The little bit I did watch I enjoyed and I know it's my kind of movie. I am also going to finish Some Mistakes were Made by the end of this week! This will actually be my first fully finished book I started of the year. Sorry it's so late but I think I liked it mostly. I w Thank you for thinking of me with your post and I will look more into the book you recommended. I will also tell you if I read the other ones. I have not been watching much of anything lately but I listened to Madison Beer's album and I think you would like it..and also Laufey and Mitski so you can share your thoughts if you want! I don't actually know what Ask Evans is besides gifs on here but im glad you liked it and I think Heart stopper is cute from gifs I've seen. The Bear will probably be the next show I watch..but I know I was saying that a month ago haha. I hope you're doing amazing!!! Love the new url if it makes you happy! I can't remember which url I followed you from lol. 🩷

hi friend!!! no worries at all; i don't take it personally at all and i hope your tumblr break is going well! 🤍

my top three albums are probably: debut / speak now / red but i love love love fearless and folklore and evermore and lover and midnights and 1989 and rep! she just has such a good discography. just one month away till 1989 taylor's version!!! i'm so, so, so excited! i took the day off (i usually take release dates off work, just because i'm notoriously bad at taking days off just to take days off) so i'm excited! i'm not sure what i'll do though — maybe something crafty! i've been in a major crafty mood lately.

i want to see rent! but part of me feels like since it's been so long i should just wait until i can see it live!! what shows were you in? i'm always so curious about school productions! and omg that's so funny about your mom! did you see the new papermill gatsby stuff? what are your thoughts? i know you were also excited about it a while ago! i hope you got some sleep + that you enjoy theatre camp when you get to finishing it! i did notice that you usually send me asks late at night for me (for us! since we're in the same timezone) and was a bit worried about your sleep schedule!

and no worries on being behind on the buddy read 🤍 i'm excited to know your thoughts when you're done! and yes — i totally forgot that for the wolf/for the throne has twins! i've been struggling to read the book (i bought a copy over a year ago) for months now so decided to just check the audiobook out from the library and my head snapped up when i heard "twin sister" and i was like OH I HAVE TO TELL 🩷 ANON IMMEDIATELY!!

i will add all of those to my list soon!! i finally treated myself to a badlands vinyl, so i need to spin that sooooon but i've been busy with work (and just generally feeling ill still) so i haven't been listening to that much music. and then there's the new del water gap album out tonight, and acoustic there it goes by maisie peters! so much new music! i love doing new music friday but i'm so bad at listening to things haha. i used to text one of my best friends a new music friday roundup, but i haven't done that in a while!

why didn't they ask evans is a miniseries that my friend jamie loves!! and i was very intrigued by it and watched the first episode many many months ago, and finally got around to watching the rest of it over the weekend! it's based off of the agatha christie book of the same title (which i haven't read, but want to)! heartstopper was very cute, and so lovely to watch while i was feeling poorly. and the music in heartstopper is phenomenal! i hope you like the bear; i can't wait to hear your thoughts when you get around to it :)

and hehe thank you!!! i have a (bad) habit of changing my url very very often! i'll probably change it in a month or so too (maybe for 1989, or maybe for holly humberstone's new album)! hope you're having a good day <3

[cleostoohot]

OOKAYYYY

im sure u get a lot of anons asking why they dont have results, blah blah blah. as someone who recently uncovered my root problems heres some advice. imma continue to to roex3dol even if the 3d doesnt show results (which it eventually will) imma continue affirming after 3 days.

HERE IS HOW TO COMBAT THE INSECURITY:

as im sure you have all heard before, dont stress the results will show up in the 3d if you keep affirming.

THE BIGGEST INSECURITY that will get in your way is "what if...." or imagining yourself after 3 days not having your desire or really seeing your future self not with ur desires. If you fall into any of these categories or something similar, catch yourself and start affirming that it has absolutely zero choice but to work. when you imagine yourself failing you are creating that room for failure, you cant believe two polar opposite concepts at once. IT IS POSSIBLE TO BELIEVE IN THE ONE YOU WANT!

ive known abt manifesting (attraction) since aug 2020, i found solar subs and law of assumption in jan 2021, in around aug 2021 i found neville and loa tumblr, in nov 2021 i started manifesting small things. now i still have manifested small things but not my dream life it hasnt appeared in the 3d. thats my experience. ive fumbled AAAAALLOOOTT. i was gonna write this on my blog but after almost two years of experience ill quickly list my largest cause of failure.

WAVERING/NOT PERSISTINGl

one day i would try affirming for the void and after that didnt work i would do a challenge, and after that didnt work i did bkanket affirmations and after that didnt work i did sats and after that didnt work i would do meditations. i didnt think i was doing anything wrong, looking back im so frustrated with myself for wasting so much time. and if lets say i did void affirmations, blanket affirmations, meditations all in one manifesting routine if i missed one i would start over because i believed it wouldnt work despite reading otherwise. this is a new realization, im not even sure i have a total grasp on my mistakes now, but imma keep persisting.

how im going to fix this: i have 1 thing i will do daily which is affirming. i have 2 affirmations i will always use "roe i have all my desires" "roe i manifest in 3dol" even after 3 days imma keep affirming. im working towards holding the assumption that it has no choice but to appear in the 3d. even just yesterday i was abt to quit "maybe i should just be okay with what i have now and revise___" NOPE. im working towards my dream life so i wont stop. just because im getting some material items in my 3d doesnt mean i should be good with what i have now. i will wake up in my dream house and blah blah blah other dream things. my tendency to do that is most likely bc im scared i wont manifest my dream life. I WILL, YOU WILL, WE ALLL WILL!!!! stick with your decisions, dont be afraid of time passing, that will hold you back.

i said this earlier i was gonna write this on my own blog but i feel more ppl would see it here. i hope that previous example i said about switching to void, to med, to affirmations really sticks with someone because that realization was key.

if you dont have what you want in the 3d after 3 days, GENUINELY address your beliefs. when blogs suggested to address your limiting beliefs, i never would bc i thought i was doing everything perfectly. BUT IM SERRRIOUUUSSSS address them. heres cleos post abt somethings that may be holding you back that was my catalyst fr to address what i was doing wrong, even if my exact problem wasnt listed there.

TYYYY CLEOOOOOOOO ill continue affirming!!!! sorry for typing mistakes i manifested a laptop but ive only used tumblr on mobile.

tysmmm for this luv💗💗💗 you should put it on ur blog too

[heyitsyn]

Manager!Inarizaki

a/n: aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa i would put in all the reqs but there were so many people who requested for our fox babies that it would literally take up every space :”) and im happy to comply so here it is

AAAA LOOK THEY’RE SO CUTE OMG LIKE BLS BUT IM A RIN SIMP :’)

alkdfjlsdfi

sunarin simp is typing😍🍃💞..........

ogeiogeiogei

hehehehehe

so im actually just going to include the starting lineup like i knowwwww theres subs but im only most familiar with the regulars :(

okay so anyways!!

now

you might be wondering

how in the hell did you become the manager of these crackheads

from calm papi kita to psycho tsumu,

why are you their manager

you, the cute and shy and innocent not wittle first year, somehow became the manager of the powerhouse volleyball team of inarizaki high

it all started with our dear lovely samu

hehe bet you didnt see that coming

now we all know baby samu literally is the biggest foodie in the team and he constantly thinks about food 24/7 therefore there isnt much room in there for anything else except for volleyball

basically, 

the dude loves to eat

it just so happens that you made food

your family owned a cafe down the street from the school and you worked there after school to help your parents

now how does this tie in with samu you ask

this chile was so hungry that he had to skip practice

sending kita a quick text about doing a quick errand, he walked down the street on the hunt for a quick place to grab a bite

he totally ignored kita’s warning of cramps if he ate a lot then practiced but whatever food is life

it just so happens he stumbles upon your family’s cafe

when he entered, the smell of bread and food entered his nostrils causing this baby to just float right in

you were manning the register while your brother was at school so you smiled at the incoming figure of this familiar boy

and because you recognized him, you couldnt help but grin and gasp a little

‘oh! miya-senpai!’

you exclaimed and osamu was confused because he’s never seen you before but he thought you were probably a kouhai in school

you looked young and definitely not a face he’s seen before so he concluded you were most likely a first year

and you were really cute

like really

really

cute

that thought caused this babe to blink awkwardly and nod at your direction

‘uh, hi’

he greeted and you smiled at his awkward nature

‘what can i get you today, miya-senpai?’

he must’ve been busy looking at you to actually look at the menu behind you and he fumbled, rushing to find a food to get

‘wh-what do ya recommend?’

he asked and you paused then thought deeply

‘hmm, we have onigiris freshly made! and we also have milk bread thats really good!’

did you just-

did you just say onigiri?

‘yea ill take some onigiri’

he decided and you lit up

‘perfect! the total is-’

he completely blanked out because wow your smile was really pretty

‘miya-senpai? miya-senpai?’

you called out and he snapped out of it

‘oh, sorry, here’

he gave you the cash and you gave him back his change before wandering to the glass case where the savory foods were placed

you seemed to glide over and osamu watched you with fond eyes, interest bubbling in him

there was something about you that made him curious

but he just didnt know what

it confused him because maybe you were just someone he hasnt seen before and not the same fans he sees all the time

‘you’re really lucky, miya-senpai. i just finished making them minutes before you walked in’

you commented

this took him aback

‘you cook?’

he suddenly asked and you chuckled, soft and airy laughs filling the air

‘of course, senpai! learning to cook is an essential for a business like this’

and thus created a beautiful friendship

he would come over to eat nearly every day of the week while you would happily serve him

sometimes, he would even buy extra so you could eat with him

while you were talking, he noticed you lacked the accent others from there had and he thought you were not originally from hyogo

he learned that you were actually from miyagi and you moved here just this year

‘so, how ya liking it ‘round here?’

he asked one day, after swallowing his food

you thought about it before shrugging

‘i mean, its still the countryside so i guess everything’s the same. maybe the dialect? my neighbors have strong accents, haha’

samu chuckled

‘its common over here. ya sound a lot more from tokyo. my best friend’s from there, ya see’

you raised an eyebrow

‘hm?’

‘rin. suna rin is in the team and hes from tokyo so he sounds like a standard city boy. ill take ya to meet him sometime’

nah he really wasnt

he wanted to keep you away from the others as much as possible, especially his brother, because he was a greasy mf

but that didnt really work out into plan because you approached him in school the other day

you saw him and you hurriedly ran to him where he stood with his twin and some guy

tsumu saw you coming from behind his brother and he smirked before nodding at you

‘samu, ya got a girlie running for ya’

samu turned, confused, until he saw your adorable face

‘y/n. whats up?’

you grinned

‘you left your team jacket, miya-senpai’

the red jacket was clutched in your hands and the two boys behind him shared a surprised look because osamu never mentioned a girlfriend

and with the way you were holding his jacket, the two boys immediately jumped into conclusions

well

more like atsumu started whining at osamu for not telling him he had a girl

‘i thought we were brothers! brothers for life!’

samu just awkwardly stands there and he has a sheepish look in his eyes that were looking at you apologetically

‘sorry about him, y/n. but thank you for returning it’

you handed him the fabric before smiling

‘it was a good thing you had a spare one for me, miya-senpai. who knew the rain would come so suddenly’

osamu sighed then playfully poked your forehead with his finger

‘how many times do i have to tell you to call me by my first name? i really dont want to hear anything that associates me with this bastard’

atsumu socked osamu at the shoulder causing the gray-haired boy to look away from you and start yelling at his brother

‘touch me again! see what happens then!’

‘yer just showing off for yer girlie! ya aint doin nothing!’

suna shook his head before turning to you with a sympathetic look

‘you really want to be with this guy? him and this idiot are practically a package’

you tilted your head

‘im,,, not with miya-senpai?’

suna blinked

‘but he gave you his jacket. he doesnt even give it to me. i guess its not part of best friend privileges’

at the mention of best friend, you lit up

‘oh! you must be sunarin! the tokyo boy!’

baby rin choked a little at the sight of your grin and he scrunched his eyebrows while awkwardly raising the corner of his lips to a smile

‘you,, uh,,, you know me?’

like it was the most obvious thing in the world, you nodded

‘at first, when miya-senpai told me, i didnt know who you were. but! youre actually very popular, suna-senpai! too bad i never saw you until today, though, because we’re in different floors. but! a lot of girls talk about you!’

poor rin didnt know how to react to that because he didnt want to look flustered but he didnt want to look cocky either

so he just opted to smile gently

‘oh. well, in that case. let me introduce myself to you. suna rintaro’

can we normalize suna being an actual nice guy instead of the cold stand-offish player bastard?

you shook his hand and said your name as well

like samu, he asked you to call him by his first name too since you were close to his friend therefore should try being close to you too

speaking of samu, him and atsumu reduced the violence to just bickering and they were still teasing each other even after you and suna talked

the coochi bangs boy rolled his eyes then slapped atsumu’s arm to gain their attention

‘yo. theres a girl here. try and be nice and civil’

atsumu seems like he forgot your existence because his eyes brightened at the sight of you

‘oh! heya!’

you nervously smiled at him because his hyperness and overall atsumu-ness was quite overwhelming

‘h-hello, miya-senpai’

atsumu pouted at how apprehensive you sounded

‘eyyy, why are you being nervous, girlie? im just samu, yanno! same face and everything!’

osamu knew you well enough that you were kinda awkward and you didnt know how to approach a hyper person like his brother so he naturally saved you

‘hey, y/n, the bell’s about to ring any moment now so try to not be late and ill be sure to see you later. do you want me to pick you up from your class and we can walk together?’

to you, it was just a simple offer from a friend but to the two, that was the confirmation of your relationship with the wing spiker

‘wahh, atsumu, your brother really is better than you. he knows how to treat girls good’

atsumu took offense to this

‘excuse you! i would be too if there were genuine girls in this school!’

osamu’s aggressive blinking was his signal for you to hurry along and you noticed causing you to chuckle before bidding goodbye

‘it was nice meeting you, rin-senpai. and,,, you too, miya-senpai. samu-senpai, later at 3?’

osamu softly smiled while nodding

‘later at 3’

the TEASING HE FACED from the two was unbearable and despite the amount of times he denied it, they were still teasing him

‘samu’s got a girlfriend~! samu’s got a girlfriend~!’

‘tsumu, i swear to god if you dont shut your trap’

‘imagine having a girlfriend’

true to his word, osamu was waiting for ya at the bottom of the stairwell from the one that led to the second floor, absentmindedly kicking some invisible thing in the floor

you were fixing your bag straps on your shoulders when you saw him at the end of the hallway and you couldnt contain your excitement seeing the grey haired boy

‘samu-senpai!!’

you shouted, getting his attention that made him whip his head up

the blank face contorted into a small smile and he raised a hand

‘yo’

when you made it next to him, you were grinning really big and samu felt flustered at your happy face

so he cupped your chin with his large hand that allowed him to squeeze both cheeks

‘cutie’

he mumbled but you didnt catch it, too busy trying to get him to stop squishing

you were originally supposed to go walk over to the cafe but you didnt know that osamu was actually trying to skip practice and he was trying to hide from the members

okay first off, i dont think samu would ever skip practice willingly bc he has the same drive as miya atsumu but he also just wants to spend time with you asklfjldfjdlk

but the loud mouth tsumu saw you guys as you turned a hallway

you were busy talking to osamu about some cooking chef guy gordon and he was nodding and talking but then he heard a loud shout

‘SAMU!’

osamu babie didnt know what was happening so he protectively placed an arm in front of you and hurriedly shoved you behind him in case something happened

duh you didnt know what was happening either so you were clutching his jacket and peeked from his arm to see atsumu stomping over with suna trailing behind him, seemingly texting on his phone

osamu lazily glared at his brother

‘what’

atsumu blanched and sped walk faster until he was right in front of him to yell 

‘IM TIRED OF YER EXCUSES! JUST CUS YA GOT YASELF A GIRLIE DUN MEAN YA GET TO SKIP PRACTICE!’

you furrowed your eyebrows

you tugged at his jacket and osamu turned to peer down at you and he gulped, preparing himself to hear your scolding

it wasnt the first time you scolded him as you just told him off the other day for not eating enough vegetables and fruits to balance out his unhealthy love for onigiri and sweets

‘samu-senpai,,, you told me you guys were taking an off week. why are you skipping practice today’

you were genuinely worried and you didnt seem to understand why he did that but the other two did and atsumu didnt hesitate

‘CUS HE WANTS TA SPEND TIME WITH YA, Y/N! BASTARD CANT EVEN BOTHER TO TELL ME THE REASON! YER SICK?! WHAT THE HELL EXCUSE IS THAT! YA NEVER GET SICK!’

poor suna is just watching this go down and he felt bad that you were caught in the middle

so he suggested a compromise

you watched sunarin push atsumu’s chest to make him back off and he gently smiled at you before looking at the two

‘how about we all go to practice and if y/n-chan wants, she can wait and osamu can spend time with her when hes done? besides, atsumu, you know osamu has been doing good on his spikes. maybe we can persuade coach and kita to let him off early since hes,,, quote unquote,, ‘sick’’

osamu debated but you emerged from behind him

‘sure! samu-senpai would love to go to practice! right, samu-senpai?’

you smiled at him but it was a stern smile

you just wanted him to go to practice because you knew now of how important volleyball was to the school and they needed to get all their time and energy to win the sport

atsumu agreed to this plan but osamu was forced to accept it

simp

just for extra measure, sunarin and tsumu walked behind you guys to the gym so you and samu had time to talk

you were chiding him of course because why would he waste time with spending time with you

‘just wanted to see ya, y/n-chan’

he winked but you pouted and wrinkled your nose

‘you cant weasel yourself out of this, samu-senpai’

osamu has never heard you scold him before so he was like o.o but inside he was like,,, hot

the gym was already on full practice and kita saw the second years from the door

aran LAKDJFLAKSFJLASDKF ARAN AAAAAAAAAAAAA nudged mimi with a smirk

as much as they loved the underclassmen, watching them get told off by kita was too funny to not watch

but what caused them to curiously peer behind the three was the appearance of a girl

a girl?

‘why’s a girl with them?’

aran mumbled and mimi shrugged, but also intrigued

you were behind osamu and he could tell you were nervous because youve heard of the reputation of the team

they were seen as practically as popular as the basketball team and everyone worshipped them

they were who put the school’s name in the map and you were about to meet the legends of inarizaki

thankfully, atsumu and rin walked to the front of you two so you and samu were at the back

samu didnt look at you but he reached behind him to open his palm as a signal for you to take it

you gratefully grabbed it and leaned closer in case something happens

‘KITA-SAN! WE GOT EM!’

atsumu shouted and suna chided him for being really loud

‘you’re late’

an even voice said in front of them and you leaned over to the side to see who it was from

your eyes bulged out of your head because one, wow he was handsome, and two, he looked like someone from miyagi

YALL KNOW WHO IM TALKING ABOUT BYE-

‘oh wow’

you mumbled absentmindedly and samu looked at you at the corner of his eye before scoffing

your face was totally bright red and your eyes were super wide

kita? really? of all guys? it was kita?

‘SORRY! was samu who took so long!’

atsumu lowered his voice down but he didnt tell the captain of his brother’s plans to skip

‘he has a stomachache and he was at the nurse’s office’

suna smoothly came up with a lie and he might look cool and calm, his hands were clasped behind him with it clenching his phone

your eyes left kita to notice that habit and you had a small smile because it was another reassurance that these boys werent as high and legendary as everyone made them to be

in the end they were still just students and boys

they were still human

‘oi, osamu, who’s the girl?’

aran finally bit the bullet and asked the question everyone has been wondering since the beginning

both you and samu stiffened at the direct question to you but he nodded

‘this is l/n y/n’

he introduced and you raised a shaky hand as a greeting but let go of samu to bow slightly to your seniors

‘hello, my name is l/n y/n, i’m a first year’

a few players also raised a hand but it was mimi who spoke at last

‘nice to meet you’

kita nodded at you but turned to the three

‘why is she with you? are you skipping again, osamu?’

again?

osamu inwardly cringed 

obviously, kita was sharper than they would think because he easily saw through suna’s lie

he also knew that samu never really got sick

he watched the younger shovel 5 bowls of ramen and still have enough room eat a plate of mochi and he was perfectly fine

it was silent between the four of you and atsumu and suna were looking at each other as they ran out of lies

dang they even planned the entire walk of what to say to kita

you looked between the twins and their friend before speaking up

‘samu-senpai really did have a stomachache. i was-uh-helping the nurse! um, i want to be a doctor or a nurse when i grow up! and-’

you started to ramble but because you were trying to lie and it was never your forte

ALKESDJFLKD Y/N I NEED TO TAKE YOU UNDER MY WING WE NEED TO TEACH YOU THIS IMPORTANT LIFE SKILL OMG

‘we were tryin to convince y/n to be a manager. thats why we took so long’

atsumu huffed

you froze

a what?

a manager?

you were genuinely truthful about wanting to go into a medical profession but not a manager

you were already a manager before and you didnt really want to do it again

kita was inspecting suna’s and atsumu’s and osamu’s faces to see a trace of dishonesty

you saw him raise a dark eyebrow and you knew then that these three cannot tell a lie to save their life

so you nodded frantically making kita look at you

‘mhm! they asked me! miya-san wanted someone they knew already so they asked me because i’m samu-senpai’s friend! so here i am!’

your awkward smile and stiff outstretched arms might’ve seem suspicious but kita moved his gaze from you to atsumu and the blonde nodded

‘yea! ya’ve been talkin bout bein worried of next year cus yall aint here no more so i got sum person responsible enough fer us!’

STOPP I HATE IT HERE I CANT SEEM TO WRITE OUT ATSUMU’S ACCENT LIKE AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

after the longest 3 seconds, kita finally nodded and closed his eyes warily

‘alright. l/n-san, come here’

you froze at the way he said your name but suna was kind enough to walk over to your place beside samu to gently push you forward to kita

‘its okay’

he mumbled and you were so thankful because that gave you enough motivation and strength to keep going

your height was staggering between these men and kita seemed to tower you

but you kept an even and calm face 

‘yes?’

you asked

kita looked at you and he stared at your face, pupils moving as a sign that he was inspecting your eyes and every feature 

oh my god you shouldve plucked your nose hairs this morning

before you could feel more self-conscious, he spoke

‘you said you want to be a doctor?’

‘well, more like a nurse but um same thing’

‘you know medical stuff? know how to treat injuries?’

‘yes. i was a manager back in my hometown so i have experience’

‘where are you from?’

‘miyagi’

‘ya familiar with shiratorizawa?’

you cringed but nodded

‘yes’

‘are you from there?’

‘yes’

the three stooges from behind you had wide eyes at this sudden revelation because that was a school theyve played before

even the last interhigh, they were familiar of how strong that school was

the eagle and the guess monster

and you were their manager before? 

must’ve been during middle school as you were just a first year

‘so you know how plays and stats work?’

‘yes. anything you want me to do, im familiar and capable to do it’

god why are you saying this

you didnt even want to be a manager in the first place

yet here you are again

you were getting flashbacks from the war ajkfdfd

kita looked at you silently once more before finally standing up straight and pointing you to their coach who was watching the whole thing with crossed arms and furrowed brows

‘there. talk to him and you can finalize everything. i think its too early to say this but nonetheless, welcome to the team, y/n’

AND THUS STARTED YOUR JOURNEY WITH THE BOYS

akldjklfjsdlakj

IT WAS ALL BUILT ON LIES BUT WHATEVER

AS LONG AS NO ONE DIED ISSOKAY

no but really dont tell lies in general yall, maybe white lies, but try not to do that

OKAY MOVING ON

MOMENTS WITH THE TEAM

duh you are much much closer to samu than the rest of the team so you tended to stick to him more

like you would go to him first if you needed something or if you wanted someone to help you with the crate, he would be your go-to

that would make atsumu whine because he felt that samu was better than him

‘oi, y/n! im really good with ma arms! i can bench 300 yanno?’

you politely smiled and nodded

‘thank you for telling me, miya-san’

then you would proceed to nudge samu’s arm yum to ask for help

butbutbutbut

dont worry!!!!

you do end up warming up to him

for my atsumu stans, yall tend to go to him when samu is either busy or you just need a good laugh

this mans will embarrass himself both on purpose or accidentally to make you laugh lmao

you also have extra bottles for his medicine because he has adhd and the guys are like,,,, yo chill

and duh atsumu would forget to take them so youre practically his reminder

we all know how tsumu was practically attacked that one time when he insulted those girls, right?

yall may have forgiven but i will never forget >:(

well, during matches, you as their manager, always have to tell the stands to be quiet when atsumu is serving 

but no one told you this

you kind of figured it out during your time like when his eye would twitch if samu was talking to suna too loudly or when he would close his eyes to shut off his hearing because of the loud spikes on the other side

you noticed it

so you would go to the stands and nicely tell them that if they see atsumu serving, to be quiet

‘i understand you are all excited when he does his serve but we would all benefit more you could release that excitement inside and silently’

*cue atsumu pretending to faint in sunas arms*

OH SPEAKING OF SUNA

YES I SAID THAT I DONT REALLY LIKE FANON SUNA BC,,,

WEED

AND DRUGS

AND RUDE 

JUST OVERALL

NOT RECOMMENDED

but canon suna :”)

as a player, suna is seen as really manipulative and snarky and witty

he loves to poke fun at the other team, even his own, and just all-around annoying

but off-court

suna is a very quiet and reserved person

totally different from the one who talks and yaps constantly to the other side of the net

and hes a really pure person in some topics

like he would turn red when you would compliment his new picture that he posted in inasgram 

PLEASE SUNA IS TOTALLY A PHOTOGRAPHER LIKE HE TAKES PICTURES OF SUNSETS AND STUFF

or when you would offer to bandage him up for him because it’s hard to do it himself and your hand would touch his

dont tell anyone this but suna is very relieved that you and samu weren’t dating

thats all

thats all for now

;)

OOOO kita!!!

okay so kita is the captain, right?

but he doesnt play

like he plays rarely and aran is usually the on-court captain

this causes you and him to be at the sidelines a lot

he would tell you what he thinks would happen next or what the next plan should be and you would provide your own input

in a way, he was the one who really taught you the mechanics of volleyball and he would tell you the different tricks that techniques that the twins came up with 

what makes you really soft and fall for him is when he starts to compliment his players

his pride in aran for being one of the top aces that has led them to nationals

his pride in mimi for being able to go on the longest on court and not be tired

his pride on akagi for being able to receive each ball and successfully give it to their setter

his pride on hitoshi for being the one who could handle the team personality wise and his plans for him to be his successor

his pride on ATSUmu for being the best setter he’s ever seen and his drive to get better no matter what

his pride on samu for being so strong and still getting stronger despite his dream career to be something not volleyball-related

his pride on sunA being motivated enough to help the team and make sure everyone knows that every ball can be stopped

like pls you almost cry all the time when you hear kita saying that because he seems to not say it to the others but only to you

it makes you happy that kita relies so much on these guys as much as they rely on him

OH MY GOSH OMIMI

okay

so omimi ren is a very quiet and calm character

hes kinda like suna where they dont really say much but when they do, its usually important and not irrelevant like atsumu

and he didnt say much when you got inducted in the team as a manager

like he just stared at you and you were just like o.o

ngl he did scare you a bit bc of his tall height looming over you and the way his dark eyes just pierces you through your soul

hes the type that you cannot willingly tell a lie to him bc you know he will find out one way or another

he can see right through you

maybe thats what makes him such a good middle blocker

but you started to warm up to him really quick and he would sometimes walk you home if the others cant mainly bc he knows his appearance will make anyone back off

its the simple things that make you appreciate him

two words: ginjima hitoshi

he is so two-faced

NO LISTEN BEFORE YALL BEAT ME UP JUST HEAR ME OUT

you know how like the 4 second years (PLEASE I KNOW THERES A GUY NAMED YUTO BUT LIKE I DONT KNOW MUCH ABOUT HIM AAAAAA TELL ME IF YOU WANT HIM IN HERE)

like suna, the twins, and hitoshi

the twins are the annoying ones who causes trouble, suna is the one taking pictures and evidence while cheering them on, and hitoshi is the one trying to break it up

BUT

i think that hitoshi is really the worst out of the 4 and he keeps in because who else would be the responsible one of the bunch

hello? they were about to be third years next year like are we really gonna go on with possibly a miya twin or suna being captain?

no

so he tries to force down his inner chaos to take on the role of the responsible one

BUTTTTT

you try to release that inner chaos

you sometimes hear him egging on atsumu under his breath like ‘do it’ but quietly so no one hears him

and youre like

?-?

please? we’re not? supposed? to allow? atsumu? to eat? and swallow? a whole? raw egg?

at first, duh he was also like that with you but you want him to be himself and be comfortable with you so you work hard to make him open up

now

you kinda regret it

because he now wants to go through the mcdonalds drive-thru, with no car, just to get mcflurries

you stared down at hitoshi from your bedroom window with a confused expression

‘but? you dont have a car?’

he grins up at you

‘but i got a CART! they said as long as it’s a car and car is in the word cart and the extra ‘t’ is just a bonus!’

‘hitoshi no-’

AAAAAA MICHIMICHI BABY

so akagi is the libero of the team and he is the one responsible for the make sure the ball doesnt touch the ground type of thing

you get really worried about him bc he does a lot of flying saves and his knees always get roughed up and such

so you try and stitch him up as much as you can like you even send him sites for good warm packs to buy

something that isnt known about akagi is that he, like atsumu, really likes to cook

but more like

he bakes

he bakes as a stress reliever and its like his meditation time

you go over to his house a lot to go bake something w him and share it to the guys later on

during ina get-togethers, him and samu are in charged of the food while youre the sous chef

SPEAKING OF SAMU

we forgot about him for a sec aldfjklkfdjlk 

it was all thanks to him

because of him, you became a manager despite your initial refusal to become one again

you made friends with more people and you were able to have a fun high school life because of it

because of him

osamu does get a little sad or irritated whenever the guys start to hog you up

like he has to push down the tantrum of ‘I SAW HER FIRST!’

he wants to be the better twin lmao

he gets really butthurt when you would go to someone else even during the middle of your conversation

like he would be talking to you on the side but suna calls you over for tape and youre going

he pouts and atsumu teases him about it causing him to bark at him

LOL HE BARKS

okay so training camp

i think therell be an imagine for this so ill try to not make it as detailed

lets just say its a mess

suna really wants to go hiking bc he wants to go the top of the mountain for pictures of the stars and stuff

but atsumu whines of the bugs and possible creatures in there

this causes osamu to tease him and call him a coward and a wimp

and leads to a fight which aran tries to break up but gets sucked in anyways

and omimi just stands by and watches but he intends to intervene if it gets too much

then akagi gets taken by suna to go the hike with him even though hes scared of bugs so hes whimpering and complaining

while kita and hitoshi are off in the kitchen talking about new grains of flour and stuff

where are you?

youre at the lodge, drinking your f/d (favorite drink) and watching all this go down bc at training camp, it’s every man for themselves

there is a lot of bonding times as a team bc these boys may seem like all they think about is volleyball but they like to do something else outside of that

what they love the most is going to the beach

not only do they get to have fun, they get to relax and see you in a swimsuit alkfdjkfj

especially when kita accidentally falls asleep? they bury him with sand and make him look like a mermaid

because they are players who work out so great bodies duh

and they get so much attention for that

but they all mainly pay attention to you and oh my

youve expressed not being comfortable in wearing a swim suit and watch these guys absolutely start throwing compliments at you

but the third years would softly tell you that it’s okay not to wear one bc all that matters is if youre comfortable or not

HELP I WANT AN ARAN AAAAAAAAAAA

OH SO

we know how kita’s family are rice farmers, right?

well

he farms to help his granny and sometimes, youre the only one who’s free enough to go and help him 

so you go over there all the time and granny really loves you bc one, you take care of her shin and thats beyond everything, and two, youre reliable and make shin laugh and such

like one time, you were carrying a basket to the back deck and granny saw you from the kitchen

she smiled before waddling over to the door so she could talk to you

‘y/n-chan!’

you whipped around quickly at the call of your name before grinning and hurrying up to her

‘yes, granny?’

she gave you a bottled water then gestured down to the field where shin was tirelessly tending to the rice

‘please give that to shinsuke. poor boy has been pushing himself too hard with the field and his sport and not taking care of himself’

she chided but there was a certain hint in her tone that made her sound so proud of her grandson

you looked down at the bottle and squeezed it

‘kita-san works hard not for himself, but for everyone else. it makes me sad when he neglects his health and tends to the team instead. so dont worry, baa-chan! i’ll take care of kita-san for him! for you!’

nah bc granny was already gossiping with her neighborhood ladies about this beautiful girl that shin got and how they should be jealous their grandsons don’t have someone like you

OOOOOOO 

since your family owns a cafe, the guys goes there all the time

its kinda like the ramen shop for the seijoh boys

they go there mainly to see you even outside of practice ANDDD

they wanna look good in front of your family

like tsumu suddenly knows cleanliness bc he cleans up the mess on the table or kita is no longer an introvert as hes now talking to your mom about the benefits of rice water and her not needing one bc her hair is already beautiful

PLEASE WHAT

and even during the summer, theyve helped out a lot when it was busy lunch times and you couldnt handle it yourself

GOSH IMAGINE SAMU BEING YOUR MOM’S APPRENTICE AND HANDSOME BOYS TAKING YOUR ORDERS WHILE SOME ARE CARRYING HEAVY TRAYS THAT MAKE THEIR ARMS POP

okay imma stop now

OH DONT GET ME STARTED DURING THE DEFEAT WITH KARASUNO

I DONT CARE YALL CAN HATE ME FOR SAYING THIS BUT KARASUNO SHOULDNT HAVE WON LIKE INARIZAKI WERE LITERALLY THE SECOND PLACE IN NATIONALS AND COMPETED AGAINST I T A C H I Y A M A

LIKE WHAT

OKAY ANYWAYS

everyone was already down and moody bc of the loss

and you wanted to be at the back bc you didnt know how to handle the situation

in your time as their manager, not once have you seen them lose

during those 10 months of being a manager, you have not once seen them be defeated during a game even with practice matches

then with those nobodies?

karasuno?

last time you checked, karasuno went down under when coach ukai retired

so having them lose was a real shock

and a really bad event

there was a certain air around you all during the bus ride to the hotel which made the entire time very uncomfortable

everyone finished their crying either in the locker rooms or the bathroom so all that was left was their red eyes

the coach sent everyone off to bed and although they were allowed more days to stay, they all collectively chose to just go home and keep those excused days as a rest day

‘we all would like to just stay at home and recharge’

kita’s request was everyone else’s, even yours, as you were both worried and tired for the boys

so that night, the coaches were able to book train tickets for everyone the next day back home

you stayed up, watching tv in your own room out of boredom because the group chat was quiet and you were too tired to do anything else

the next day, everyone 

osamu claimed your shoulder and he held your hand tight with his

his breathing was ragged and even with his closed eyes, the redness around them made it obvious he had been crying

the bus that was filled with excitement before, became quiet and the sound of the engine and wheels took over the silence

you thought samu had fallen asleep so you raised your free hand to stroke his hair

‘hey y/n?’

you flinched at the surprise but hummed 

‘imma tell him today. later, but today’

his voice was low and he was murmuring to hint that this was the extra sensitive topic you both discussed a few days ago at the cafe

you nodded but made sure he knew that no matter, he still got you

the coaches were upset and mad at the loss

but in the end, they all realized that this was the last game the boys would play as a team

sure, they could have practice matches and they could play again together in the future but nothing would change the atmosphere and feeling of playing the important matches 

this was the team that brought them closest to nationals with placing second out of the entire country

they were a good team that somehow got defeated

but the coaches were still proud

they didnt even yell at the boys to take laps and instead brought them into a team meeting

you stood beside the coaches, your own sniffles with everyone else, and listened to them talk

‘-year has been the most productive this school’s team has had in decades. i hope you all are proud of yourselves as we are proud of you. you lost so you are no longer in the competition and we talk about it tomorrow. but for now, go home and take a rest because tomorrow, we will be running laps and drills and miss y/n will be timing you until you pass out from exhaustion’

you blankly looked at the coaches bc you thought this would be a heartwarming talk but quickly turned into a threat

‘but thats for tomorrow. so go home and rest up. expect what is to come’

you were just wanting to leave lmao

like you wanted to hurry home and make something for the guys to eat tomorrow

just do something to make them at least smile

the guys were quietly packing up and you watched them with trembling eyes at their dismissal

you wanted them to stay longer

stay here and laugh and mess around

like tsumu poking kita and pretending he didnt

or mimi talking about something and aran staring blankly at him but he’s really sleeping with his eyes open and startling him awake

‘guys!’

you shouted

they all stopped and turned to look at you

‘hm?’

hitoshi asked

you hurriedly looked around to find something to stall them here and you noticed the cherry blossom tree that’s blooming 

must be the time of the year

‘l-lets! have a-take a picture! outside! by the tree!’

you pointed and they looked at each other

you were acting strangely

but they were simps for you so they just nodded and went outside

they didnt even complain and went to stand out in front of the tree

you had your phone and pulled it to the camera app to raise it to get the team in the frame

they looked sad and tired and worn out but they were still trying to joke around and have natural smiles

‘closer, you guys! bunch in closer!’

you motioned with one hand but they stopped

‘um? y/n? aren’t you gonna join us?’

ren asked but you shook your head

‘its? for you guys? besides, no one will take it for us, silly’

the boys insisted on you prop it up on a bench over there because they wanted you there with them

‘hey, come here! lets all be in it!’

aran shouted and you had no choice but to follow them

the boys had to stand closer to the camera as the bench was a ways ahead of the tree but dont worry, the tree is still there

they wanted you in the front bc they were all taller than you but they really wanted to showcase you

you were their manager and the person who took care of them

they treasure you so much

‘smile!!!’

someone shouted and the timer hit zero and the picture was taken

sure, their school’s motto was that they didnt need things like memories

to not have anything tying you down to the past and to challenge yourself with everyone focusing on the future ahead

in years from now, you could just be another thing from their past and nothing else

but they would be damned if that happened

any fragment of you to remind them of the best time of their youth and the person who loved them more than anyone else did

so yea, sure they wanted to represent their school’s motto

but this time

they can make an exception

a/n: HII!!!! IM BACK AND SUDDENLY IM ABLE TO WRITE AND FINISH THIS I SWEAR I CANT BELIEVE IT TOOK ME THIS LONG TO PUBLISH THIS I CANT WITH THIS YALL IM LOWKEY DISAPPOINTED IN MYSELF AND IM ASHAMED IM SO SORRY