#—folks that got bullied in high school deciding they want their turn at starting drama and being mean girls. Idk it’s pathetic lowkey and—

[loghainmactirs-archive]

helloooo beloved moots 🫶🏻

I’ve decided my hiatus will actually most likely be indefinite and that I may delete in the new year (I’ll remake end of next, maybe 😊). If you wanna keep in touch then this is my Discord (although I have been locked out of my account for a few days, so requests might take a bit to accept) and this is my Steam. Big love to you all and I hope to see you on my other socials <3

[butterflyinthewell]

To trans folks who are trying to set trolls straight about Chris-Chan’s gender: Your hearts are in the right place, but the trolls do not care. They will keep misgendering Chris to piss you off and screenshot your reaction.

Yes, I’m talking about THE Chris-Chan. CWC, creator of Sonichu.

(TW: this post will mention rape and incest.)

I know, I know… “But if we let people misgender Chris, what’s stopping them from doing it to other trans people?”

Nothing.

There’s nothing you can do, unfortunately. The thing with trolls is they aren’t here to learn, they’re here to frustrate, annoy and anger you. They throw out all kinds of little hooks by saying offensive things, or things that trick you, and it’s all a game to them when somebody bites the bait.

It wouldn’t surprise me if trolls are saying horrible things about autism, too. That’s more my lane and partly why I don’t dig too deep in the tags about this situation. Again, I stress not engaging with that to correct trolls. They don’t care, they want to offend you.

As frustrating as it is, take note of the people who use Chris’ current pronouns and recognize that there are people who make an effort to get them right. I’m sure the trans people reading what you say will see that and know you care to gender them correctly.

It’s possible Chris transitioned believing she can get with lesbians. It’s entirely possible she’s exactly the stereotype that TERFs rant about and her shitty behavior might be used in the future to argue their views. TERFs will be TERFs. Some of Chris’ trolls may be trans themselves.

As it stands, Chris presents as a woman, so I’ll use she/her pronouns unless she decides to present as non-binary or a man again. You’re welcome to do the same when talking about her. Don’t waste your time trying to correct trolls, just use Chris’ current pronouns and leave it at that.

It sucks, but that’s how trolls troll.

Moving on…

I wonder if Chris would’ve been a weird, harmless nobody if Mimms never took her photo in The Game Place.

This all started because her photo was taken without her knowledge or consent and posted on a forum, which ended up spreading to the wider web and…yeah.

Would she have been an internet sensation? Would she have transitioned? Would she be a known name on the web?

Maybe everything would’ve gone down the same, but without an audience to bear witness.

Regardless, Chris is a trainwreck of a person. I don’t say that lightly. She didn’t deserve the trolling and abuse she got, yet she isn’t innocent in this either.

I felt sorry for her at first because I’m autistic too and was bullied severely in high school, some of it included physical assault and attempted murder. I reacted to the constant name calling and mockery irl a lot like Chris reacted to her online trolls. I’m thankful that my most volatile years happened before I had internet access. I’m two years older than Chris. I had my own drama with trolls that lasted a few years, but I grew up a bit more.

But I digress…

Chris didn’t get the internet safety talk that I got before getting let loose online, and people took advantage of her gullibility, her autism, whatever mental illnesses she might have and her obsession with getting laid. She ignored warnings to the contrary and in some instances her mom enabled her while her dad tried (and failed) to reign her in.

At the same time, Chris has a history of being racist, ableist, homophobic and misogynistic. She ignores people’s boundaries even when they were clearly stated. She’s entitled and thinks everything bad is a conspiracy against her. She acts like the world operates on cartoon rules and can’t handle it when situations don’t turn out in her favor like she believes they should. It’s a strange view of “Anything I do is good because I did it, and anybody who tells me it’s bad or treats me badly is evil or a troll.”

How she comes across to others and how she thinks she comes across are incongruent with each other, and she refuses to take any correction. An example is the claw hand she used to do while railing at trolls. It’s clear she’s imitating stuff she saw in cartoons, but doesn’t grasp that it looks silly in real life. It leaves me wondering if she ever watched her videos back to see how she really looks before uploading them.

Chris did a lot of disgusting things of her own volition, like not leaving people alone, uploading that sexual drawing featuring Megan, using pepper spray without provocation and trying to hit someone with her car.

Trolls tricked her into humiliating herself and shared the results, like hacking into her email, sharing chats where she gave out embarrassing details about herself, prank calling her house and posting the infamous blowup doll video.

If you know “Christory”, you know what I’m talking about.

If you don’t know, it’s something that’s gone on longer than some people have been alive.

No side is innocent here. I don’t blame Chris for attracting trolls, they chose to go and harass her because she jumped when they poked her.

I’ve followed Chris’ story off and on since 2008, back when she was making her Sonichu comics and being awkward. I never participated in trolling her. I’ve only ever seen the aftermath of troll operations, but the things she endured were cruel. (The Miyamoto saga and the BlueSpike saga come to mind.) I looked her up to see if she was alive and okay. I sent her my AFBV message a couple years ago, but never got a response.

I wonder if this could’ve been avoided if Chris never got trolled and was supervised better while online. That’s where her parents failed her. I felt bad for her; she didn’t know how to conduct herself and kept falling for trolling schemes because she was so desperate to get a girlfriend. It’s like she ignored that little gut warning that says “hey, this feels like a trick” and it was like watching someone fall down the same hillside over and over.

But after what she did to her mom, I lost any sympathy I had for her. Yes, trolls have traumatized her and messed with her head for over a decade and that’s gross, but what she did to her mom was unconscionable. It’s indefensible. It’s morally abhorrent.

She had sex with (or possibly raped via coercion) her elderly mom, who may have dementia.

Chris’ autism was taken advantage of for years, and now she might’ve taken advantage of her mom’s dementia to harm her for the past month.

Think about that. There is no defending that. She finally did something she can’t just wave away or pay her way out of.

Trolls didn’t put Chris up to that, she did it all by herself.

Now she’s under arrest.

Time and again Chris has had run-ins with the law and got away with slaps on the wrist, but I don’t think she’s going to walk away from this so easily.

I hope this situation finally gets Chris the help she desperately needs. I don’t know if her dimensional merge stuff is a delusion from undiagnosed and untreated mental illness or if it’s a paracosm she’s chosen to live in and act out because she can’t handle how cruel the real world is. Please note that I don’t say mental illness lightly either, because I’m aware of the stigma.

At this point I think she needs a caregiver who will supervise her online activities and help her manage her finances. (She will likely resist this…)

Chris’ autism and whatever else she has going on appears to make it very difficult for her to see things from any perspective besides her own. I’m autistic too, so I understand this— sometimes I get this way and have to walk myself back to see other perspectives, or I ask people to give me their side of it to help me understand how they see it even if I don’t agree with their view.

Chris needed more guidance and reality checks growing up, but didn’t get them, and now she needs both more than ever as she faces the results of her behavior. If she is delusional, she needs help to navigate it and I hope she can do that away from trolls. She needs to face consequences for (possibly) raping someone.

I wonder what the legal system will do with her, and I hate that her life has come to this. It was so avoidable. 😞

Sorry, Chris…I hope you’ll get help now, and I hope Barb is okay.

[noraryker]

BASICS

Name: Nora Ann Ryker

Gender & pronouns: Cis-Female, She/Her

Species: Human

Face: Amy Adams

Age: 39, October 29, 1980

PERSONALITY

Moral Alignment: True Neutral

Zodiac: Scorpio

Personality Traits:

Positive: Brave, Loyal, Determined, Passionate, Self-Reliant

Negative: Secretive, Judgmental, Cynical, Unforgiving, Obsessive

TV Tropes: Dark and Troubled Past, The Unfavorite, Amateur Sleuth,  Bully Hunter, The "I Love You" Stigma, Always Save The Girl (family edition)

HISTORY - TW: underage drinking, underage sex, drug use, alcohol poisoning, self-destructive behavior, 

There’s not a lot of things you could consider remarkable about Nora Ryker. Born the middle child in an upper-middle class family in Washington, she grew up comfortable - never wanting for food or clothing, but nonetheless dissatisfied. The middle child syndrome was strong in this one, as Nora often found herself fading into the background when compared to her older brother and younger sister. She received decent enough grades in the beginning, but not enough to compare with her younger sister's constant advanced classes. She might have placed silver at her district's cross-country running meets - but who would sit through that when her brother was going to state as star quarterback? Her parents loved her, they did, but between three kids and two full time jobs? They just didn't have time for the middle's tantrums. After a few years of struggling to make herself seen, Nora decided that if her parents weren't going to give her attention -  she would find it elsewhere.

Nora was twelve when a sophomore gave her her first taste of beer at a joint middle-high school track meet; and despite the way it tasted, she liked the impressed looks on her classmates’ faces. She learned early that the more daring you were, the more attention others would give you - and Nora couldn't get enough. Choked down gulps of beer graduated into quick shots of vodka, with Nora clenching her eyes to get past the burn in her throat. Liquor turned to weed when she hit eighth grade, and losing her virginity followed shortly after. She barely remembered the act itself. but she remembered the greedy, almost desperate way that he touched her. For that brief (brief) moment, she was the most important thing in the world to someone, and she loved it. As her siblings continued to try and earn their parents love and approval, Nora made it her mission to earn their disapproval. Boy, did she earn it.

If it was offered, Nora tried it. Liquor, drugs, sex - even harmless petty crimes, she did it all. Had anyone asked what prompted this change, she wasn’t necessarily sure that she could explain. All Nora knew was that the older she got, the more that void in her chest became harder to fill. By the time her parents noticed the changes in their daughter, it was too late. She started to push it overboard, sleeping with anyone (even her sister's boyfriend), and injecting anything into her body. She even wound up in the hospital with alcohol poisoning a few times. Her parents didn't handle their middle daughter the best either; the sounds of their past screaming matches still coming to mind every now and again. Once desperate for their attention, Nora now felt suffocated by them now. The more they pushed, the more she acted out, and the fights didn't end when Nora left for college either. All it did was turn into constant texts and phone calls.

Forestry was supposed to be a throwaway major, something to get her degree in so her parents would stop threatening to cut her off. Her adviser suggested it because she had grown up camping in the mountains, and Nora’s lack of interest was starting to wear on her. What no one expected was that Nora would fall in love with her major. The core classes were a boring joke, but the trips out into the wilderness actually eased some of the hollowness in her chest. She became less concerned with trying to earn love, and more concerned with the preservation and maintenance of parks. Nora couldn't seem to graduate fast enough -  with her overwhelming enthusiasm landing her an internship and then an eventual job with Mount Rainier's Park Service. She lost herself in those tall trees, going in one person and coming at another.

Truth be told, Nora doubts her life would have changed at all if it weren't for her niece showing up one day at her doorstep. Barely 16, Addison was all hard edges and secrets - filled with a type of emptiness that Nora recognized immediately. Of course, she was a little surprised by the arrival - Nora might have settled things with her sister over some past issues and visited every once in a while, but she'd never felt particularly close to her niece. Not initially. Still, she gave her a place to sleep, and a free meal whenever she wanted - without even batting an eye. Nora's sister seemed more than happy to leave her problem child with her problem sister.

With Addison, Nora understood that it wasn’t attention she was seeking but understanding. It’s what Nora had wanted in the end, after all. She never asked any prying questions, never stormed into Addison’s room to search for drugs, and most importantly - she didn’t demand answers to why Addison felt the way she did. Nora knew that it was a hard question. Truth be told, it was also nice having someone there to come home to as well. She was no longer the Nora fighting to find herself in other people, but every once in a while she’d still feel the barest traces of loneliness. She might not have sought to soothe herself with other people anymore, but it’d be a lie if she said having Addison around didn’t help her as well. The two of them formed an easy, silent companionship. Nora didn’t try to lock Addison down when she made the decision to leave, but a quiet part of her heart went with her.

Nora hasn’t let herself cry once about Addison’s disappearance - refusing to give in to despair. She can feel it flickering at the corners of her mind, but what good will crying do? Addison’s parents could spend their days praying for a savior and begging for their “baby girl” to come back, but Nora wasn’t just going to sit around. Nora was always one to act, and right now is no different. Her rougher edges might have smoothed out with time, but there’s still a hellion under her skin... and her trip to Blackrock isn’t going to be a short one.

CONNECTIONS:

*Note, Royan cannot think of any in-depth ones right now, so she's going to keep it short and sweet and just word vomit in a stream of consciousness.  If you had plotted a connection with the previous Holly and would like to keep it, please hit me up! I am open for anything

Any original ideas! As stated above, I'm open for anything! Bring the pain! Bring the drama! 

Roommates - She needs a place to stay. Motels are expensive and she knows she's going to be here a while so would anyone like to sublet to Nora?  [OPEN]

Bully Hunter - Nora hates bullies. She may not be the warmest person in town but Nora came to the rescue of this person, stepping in when something was going wrong.   [OPEN]

Coworkers - Luckily for Nora, being a former ranger has its perks in Blackrock. I was looking to have her transfer to this department to keep her money flow going so any other rangers, game warden, interns would be welcome connections  [OPEN]

The Pack - This one is really open to anyone in the pack, esp folks that were close to Addison. Despite being far away, I like to think that Addison still kept in touch with her aunt. Nora's been her confidante for so long, so I want to say she would have known maybe one or two names?  [OPEN]

Horny on Main - I have yet to be horny on main with either character, so if someone wants a one-night stand/sexual tension with Nora, I love it. Sex has always been a big distraction for her, so why the fuck not? Personally, though, I don't see Nora sleeping with anyone under 29-30 with light exceptions depending on the FC because some FCs just look too young for me to feel comfortable pairing with someone Nora/Amy Adams' age.  [OPEN]

SUSPICION - This person just really causes all the warning bells in Nora's head to go off. They know more than they're telling her, she's certain, and she will get the truth from her even if it kills them her.  [OPEN]

Short Connections I will keep adding to:

Drinking buddy.

Confidant - knows what she's going through and sympathizes with.

[rpf-bat]

Spent My High School Career Spit On And Shoved To Agree

Pairing: Gerard Way x Reader

Genre: High School AU, Romance, Drama

Summary: You find out that a classmate has been picking on your best friend, Gerard. You won’t let this go - even if he tells you, that you should. 

A/N: Guess who came off, like, a year long hiatus from writing, just because I read a really shitty high school AU fic, and thought I could do better? (It me. Sorry for being inactive for so long!)

Trigger warning for bullying/violence, and usage of the f-slur.

You held the paper towel Coach Rickly had given you to your nose, trying not to bleed on your Misfits shirt as you walked to the nurses’ office.

As soon as you entered the clinic, you saw a familiar figure seated on one of the cots.

“Gerard?” you blinked, surprised.

“Y/N?” your friend looked up at you, not expecting you to be here. “Oh geez, what happened to your face?”

“I was in gym class,” you explained. “We were playing dodgeball, and when Ray threw the ball, it hit in me in the face.”

“Oh no,” Gerard grimaced.

“It was an accident,” you shrugged. “He apologized like six times, he felt really bad. I told him I’d be ok.”

“I hope so,” Gerard replied.

“More importantly,” you asked, “what are you doing here?”

Gerard lifted up his shaggy hair, revealing a black, bruised left eye.

“What happened?” you gasped.

“Matt happened,” Gerard sighed.

“Matt, from French class?” you guessed.

“Yeah,” Gerard confessed. “The, uh, the school play is coming up. It’s a musical this year. The tryouts are today, so I was in the boys’ bathroom, practicing my singing. Matt came in, and he heard my falsetto, and started making fun of me. Said only fags sing that high. And then his friend was like, I bet if you kick him in the dick, you can make that pansy boy sing even higher. So, Matt kicked me, and I tried to fight back, and then his friend punched me in the face.”

You saw red.

 “I’m going to kick Matt’s ass,” you growled. How dare he bully your friend like this! You were going to make him pay.

“Y/N, don’t….” Gerard protested. “I just….I’m just gonna wait for the nurse to come back with that ice pack for my eye, and then I’m going to back to class. And so should you. Just forget about it.”

“I can’t forget about it!” you insisted. “Matt’s a douchebag! I won’t let him get away with hurting you!”

“Don’t get in trouble on my account,” Gerard argued.

“I don’t care if I’m in trouble,” you fumed. “You’re my friend, Gee. I hate the way people at this school treat you. You don’t deserve it. I’m sorry that I wasn’t there to protect you.”

“It’s not your fault that we don’t have fourth period together,” Gerard shrugged. “And it’s not your job to defend me. Guys are supposed to be able to defend themselves….I just need to get stronger.”

“You don’t need to change anything about yourself.” You loved Gerard for the chubby, nerdy, soft boy that he was. He wasn’t like all the other boys in this shitty New Jersey town. Nothing was wrong with him.

Something was very wrong with the system, that allowed a popular kid like Matt to get away with this. But, you were going to fix that, and god damn the consequences.

%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%

You found Matt at lunch, sitting with his goon friends from the football team. You stormed right up to his table, rage in your eyes.

“Hey asshole,” you glared. “I heard you beat up my friend.”

“Who, the little poof from the art club?” Matt chuckled.

“His name is Gerard,” you snapped.

“I don’t care what his name is,” Matt shrugged. “He’s a fucking weirdo. Putting on lipstick in the bathroom mirror, singing some fag song about being a ‘sweet transvestite’….does he want to be a chick or something? Wasn’t sure his dick was actually there til I kicked it.”

His friend high-fived him, as if this was the funniest joke he’d heard all day. You weren’t laughing. You grabbed Matt by the collar, pulling him out of his seat.

“Hey, let me go, you psycho!” Matt protested.

“Eat me,” you swore, and punched him directly in the face, knocking him backwards.

“What the fuck is wrong with you?!” Matt screamed, getting back up, and launching himself at you. You dodged his punch, and kicked him in the shin, sending him tumbling  back onto the cafeteria floor.

“Guys, help me!” Matt cried, and his friend (probably the one who had blackened Gerard’s eye) leaped up from the table and punched you in the mouth.

You tasted blood - the lip had split. You didn’t care. Still fueled by rage, you punched Matt’s friend in the gut. He cried out in pain.

“Miss Y/N!” you heard a horrified voice scold, and you whipped around to see the principal standing in front of you. “What on earth are you doing?!”

Shit, you thought. I’m in trouble.

“My office,” the principal barked. “Now.”

%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%

Ultimately, you were given three days of suspension. Matt didn’t get suspended along with you, which you thought was bullshit. But, you weren’t really sorry for what you had done.

Your folks had grounded you, when they found out what you did. But, three days sitting at home watching zombie movies while they were at work, still wasn’t all that bad.

You were halfway through Dawn Of The Dead when you heard a knock at your front door. You hit pause, wondering who it could be.

You looked through the peephole and saw Gerard standing on your doorstep.

It’s four o clock, you realized. School must have just gotten out. He came straight here to see me?

He really was the sweetest friend a girl could have. You opened the door to let him in.

“Hey, Gerard,” you greeted. “How’s your eye doing?”

“The bruising’s gone down,” he shrugged, shuffling awkwardly into your foyer. “How’s your lip? I heard you got hurt, trying to….avenge me.”

“I’m fine, Gee,” you assured him, shutting the door behind you. “Don’t worry about me.”

“But, I am worried!” he said, and you realized he sounded near tears. “I….I wasn’t man enough to fight my own battles, and so you got dragged into it, too. And he hurt you.”

“You don’t have to ‘be a man’, Gee,” you sighed. “You’re just a sixteen year old kid. The adults - the teachers - they should do something about all the bullying that goes on at our school. They should try and help you.”

“They don’t care, Y/N,” Gerard frowned. “Matt is the teacher’s fucking favorite, he’s the MVP, Homecoming King, whatever, and I’m just some weird loser….”

“You’re not a loser,” you insisted, grabbing Gerard and pulling him into a tight hug. “You’re amazing, Gee. You draw, and you sing, better than anybody else I know. You’re special. They just don’t know you like I do.”

“I’m not special,” Gerard mumbled, pushing you away. “The drama teacher probably won’t even give me the role of Frank N. Furter. She’s gonna tell me I suck.”

“You don’t suck!” you reassured him. “You can get that role!”

“Even if I did,” he argued, “prancing around onstage, in that costume, would just make people like Matt, make fun of me even more.”

“Who cares what they think?” you scoffed. “Gee, listen to me. Two more years at this piece of shit school, and then you’re gonna graduate, and you can finally get out of this town. You’ll get into a good art school in New York. I know you will. And in the big city, people will appreciate what you can do. They’ll be more accepting, of people who are different.”

“They keep calling me gay,” Gerard frowned. “I mean, there’s nothing wrong with being gay, but, I....”

He blushed and trailed off.

“But, you do like girls,” you supplied.

“I’ll never get a girlfriend,” Gerard mumbled self-loathingly. “What girl is gonna want a fat wimp who can’t even defend himself? Who hides behind a girl, like a coward?”

“I chose to fight Matt,” you reminded him, putting a gentle hand on his shoulder.“You didn’t make me do this for you. As I recall, you told me not to.”

“I knew you were going to get in trouble,” Gerard said, looking up into your eyes. “You’re suspended from school, because of me.”

“I’d do it again, in a heartbeat,” you confessed. “I care about you a lot, Gee. I couldn’t stand to see what he did to you, and just do nothing.”

Gerard turned red again, and looked away. “I, uh, I brought you the notes from French class, that you missed today,” he stammered.

“Thank you,” you replied gratefully.

“There’s going to be a test the day you come back,” he reminded. “So, you’ll need to study while you’re stuck here.”

“I will,” you nodded. “I appreciate the heads up.”

Gerard looked around your living room awkwardly, unsure what to say next.

“Since you’re here,” you asked, “do you want to watch the rest of this movie with me? It’s your favorite.”

“Your folks won’t mind?” Gerard asked uncertainly.

“Oh, they won’t be home for a few more hours,” you shrugged.

“Were they really mad,” Gerard wondered, “when they found out, that you got suspended, for getting in a fight?”

“A little,” you winced. “They confiscated my car keys. And my phone.”

“Oh!” Gerard realized. “That’s why you didn’t answer me, when I tried to call you last night?”

“My phone’s been off since yesterday,” you frowned. “Sorry.”

“No, it’s ok, I’m….actually kind of relieved,” Gerard admitted. “I was worried you weren’t answering, because you were mad at me.”

“Never,” you said gently. “You’re my best friend, Gerard. I couldn’t possibly stay mad, or blame you, for something like this. I was the dumbass who decided to fight him in the middle of the cafeteria! Whatever consequences I get...that’s on me, not you. Okay?”

“Okay,” Gerard smiled, sounding like he was feeling a bit better. He sat down on your couch. “Let’s watch some zombies eat people.”

You grinned, and unpaused the classic Romero movie.

%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%

As the credits rolled, Gerard sat up straight and turned to you.

“Y/N….” he began nervously.

“Yeah?” you smiled. “What is it, Gee?”

“So, the day after your suspension is over,” Gerard said quietly, “is also the day of the school dance.”

“Are you planning on going this year?” you asked. “I think it was pretty fun last year, when we went with a big group of friends. I know Frank got in trouble for spiking the punch bowl, but…”

“I don’t want to go with friends this year,” Gerard interrupted.

“Oh?” you blinked. “Is there a girl that you’re going to ask, to be your prom date?”

“I shouldn’t even bother,” Gerard sighed. “Never mind.”

“What do you mean?” you frowned, looking over at him. You wished he had more self confidence. “You’re really cute, Gerard. I’m sure if you ask a girl, she’d be happy to go with you.”

“I’m...cute?” Gerard repeated, like he didn’t believe the words he was hearing.

You looked him over again. His long, soft-looking hair. His big, strong hands. His squeezably chubby cheeks. He really was a cute boy. Secretly, you’d thought that for a long time.

You leaned in closer, and his face reddened.

“Gerard,” you said, almost in a whisper, as you looked into his hazel eyes, “is there something that you want to ask me?”

“I….I can’t,” he blushed.

“Well, then, I can,” you smirked, leaning over so you were almost touching him. “Gerard, will you go to prom with me?”

“Y/N, I…..”

“Not as friends this time,” you clarified, a long-hidden attraction in your eyes. “As a date.”

“Yes,” Gerard whispered hoarsely. “Yes. I never thought you would say that, but, yes, please!”

You closed the gap between you, kissing him on his stunned mouth. He didn’t move at first. It was as if he was waiting for you to tell him, that this was all some kind of sick joke.

But when he realized this was real, you wanted him, his mouth responded to yours eagerly, and he pulled you closer, into his lap.

“No matter what Matt, or anyone, says,” you gasped, coming up for air, “you are so handsome, Gerard, and so talented, and one day, the world will appreciate you for who you are.”

You pressed him down into the couch cushions, enjoying the redness in his cheeks and the desire in his eyes. You thought he was beautiful - and you were certain that one day, you would be far from the only one.