#…. honestly I’d probably do the same thing hahaaaa

[ashdash2417]

So it took me three watches of this to realize….

Shredder actually did leave scratches on Donnie’s battle shell! 😤😭 (I know this was entirely possible, but I never actually saw that after effect, nor did I notice it until just now pfbtbttb!)

[blueluneacy]

Anything to You

.Hahaaaa It’s the third place vote fic. I did it.

It’s a Bruno/Reader, hella

Word Count: 2.6k

Also on AO3

Warnings: bondage, slight power play, u call him capo, not sfw im not sure what else u expect from me

“They say that silk used to be highly coveted. That it was worn by royalty and all that.” You smiled, trying to make light conversation as your lover slowly and carefully started to tie your arms. This felt so awkward, it was shocking that you even suggested in retrospect. It wasn’t that you didn’t want to try something like this, quite the contrary, you just never thought your lover would agree. Bruno tended to be the worrying type, soft and gentle, preferring things that helped him relax rather than this. You knew he worked hard to protect others, you didn’t want to make him feel responsible for you. But when you brought it up in jest, Bruno seemed to jump on the opportunity, happy to oblige your request. You wondered if he was doing this just to please you, or if he actually wanted to. 

“Well, then it seems like the perfect fit for you.” Bruno teased, leaving you just to giggle as you shook your head.

“Oh, you’re too sweet to me, darling. If it wasn’t so hot in this damned city, I’d say you should wear it all the time. I still don’t know how you spend all that time in that damned suit.” You replied, giving back the same teasing voice he gave to you. It was nice how the two of you could have a banter like this while you were literally being tied to your bedpost. 

“It isn’t so bad, really. Plus, I thought you liked my suits.” He replied, leaving you just to giggle as his hands let go of the siken ropes. You pulled a bit, testing to see about the knots. They were tight, although you should probably expect as much from a sailor’s son. 

“I do, but I like to see you without it too. But seriously, I would be sweating on a constant if I wore what you did.” You chuckled, before sighing and just leaning your head back into the pile of pillows Bruno had set up to make sure that you were comfortable. You swallowed a bit, glancing over at your lover. “I, um… I’m ready whenever you are.” You replied, watching as Bruno’s face softened just a bit, smiling down at you.

“Let me know if you feel uncomfortable at all.” He cooed, beginning to slip off his own clothing. You cooed as you watched him undress, your eyes glancing over those tattoos you so loved to run your fingers over, the collarbone you loved to press kisses on, the way Bruno’s hair just almost fell into the way of his eyes. Your own eyes met his blue ones, and for a moment you could see that he was blushing, taking in your own gaze. It was sort of cute that Bruno got embarrassed over being looked at by you. I mean, it wasn’t as though this was all things you haven’t seen before, but he still acted as though it was his first time. 

But finally, Bruno was undressed, moving over to you swiftly as he crawled on top of you. You chuckled a bit as you felt his breath against your neck before he pressed his lips there, moving lower down to your collarbone. You idly twisted your wrists just a little bit, just to see what your exact range of movement was. You were a bit distracted by it, only to be brought back by Bruno’s teeth pressing into your flesh just so. You gasped, looking over to him and watching as he pulled up to give you a satisfied grin.

“I’d hate for you to get distracted, my love.” He cooed, reaching over to run a hand through your hair, his gaze warm and loving. “I want you to keep your eyes on me. I want to be able to look up and see those beautiful eyes of yours.” He cooed, leaning in to press a kiss against your forehead. You giggled just the slightest bit, craning your head to try and catch his lips against yours, but to no avail. He pulled away and went back to pressing gentle kisses on your neck as his hands found themselves moving slowly down your waist to your hips, squeezing just the slightest bit. You gasped at the slight pressure, tilting your head to the side to try and grant Bruno more access. You shivered as you heard him let out a small growl. It wasn’t typical of your lover, leaving you confused, but still a bit turned on from it.

“Oh? Do you want me to be more rough with you, then? Was that the goal of all of this?” Bruno’s voice was low, dripping with a lust that told you that he was only barely holding himself, and god you did not want him to. Bruno was alway so reserved with you, his touch gentle and his words loving, that it felt enticing, almost taboo for him to be anything but. And god, there really was something sweet about biting into the forbidden fruit.

“Bruno, I want you to do whatever you please to me like this.” You purred out, a small smirk climbing across your face, only to be quickly wiped out and Bruno bit down at your neck. You let out a small moan, trying to glance over at your lover. When he finally granted you that right, it was when Bruno pulled away from your neck and let his lips crash into yourself, his entire presence demanding your submission. You happily parted your lips for your lover, ceding any control over the kiss to relish in how Bruno’s body had started to press against yours, how you could feel his hard cock pressing against your thigh. You moaned as Bruno’s teeth dug into your lower lip, his nails dug your flesh he moved to mark you up.

“You’re beautiful, you know that? Absolutely beautiful.” Bruno couldn’t stop himself from murmuring praises to you as he pressed bruising kisses up and down your neck, making sure that there would be absolutely no way to hide the marks. “I’m so lucky you’re all mine. I won’t ever be letting you go.” Bruno’s words were enough to make heat really start to pool in your gut as you attempted to press your legs together. But, Bruno just hummed and pressed his knee in between your legs, just a bit of a mischievous smirk on his lips.

“Oh, tesoro. I thought you said I could do whatever I want? You shouldn’t hide yourself away so I don’t know what all my options are.” He hummed, his hands trailing down from your hips to gently grab your thighs, squeezing them playfully before spreading your legs wide. You felt your face heat up as you saw Bruno looking over you, realizing just how turned on from all of this you were. It was your turn to be bashful about all this, gulping as you saw Bruno stand up and make his way over to the nightstand to grab a bottle of lubricant and squeeze a good helping onto his hands.

“Well, I should at least prepare mio amore beforehand, shouldn’t I?” He asked before slowly, achingly pressing two fingers inside you to stretch you out. “I want you nice and prepared for me when I take you, after all. You need me badly, don’t you, amato?” Bruno’s voice was so smooth as he pressed up against you, practically whispering in your ear before leaning in to nip just the slightest bit.

“Y-Yes, Bruno, please, need you, fuck, feels so goood…” You were shocked to find your voice shaky, soft and whimpering for your lover as he added another finger.

“I know, I know, but be patient, dear. Let me fuck you with my fingers so you’ll be nice and ready for your Capo’s cock.” Bruno didn’t pick up on what he said until you questioned it, gasping out to him.

“C-Capo?” Your words made Bruno’s eyes widen as he froze up, starting to pull away as he tried to apologize.

“O-Oh, I’m sorry mio tesoro, I didn’t mean to say something that would upset you, I-” Bruno went on, and you knew that if you didn’t stop him now, it might not only be the end of the evening, but the end of this sort of thing happening all together. Maybe Bruno saw it as unprofessional, but it was hot when he pulled rank in the bedroom, and you did say you wanted Bruno to do whatever he wanted, right? So in the middle of his rambling, you arched you back to try and get just a little closer, interrupting him. You were still mad at how light your voice sounded, but alas.

“C-Capo, please… Don’t stop…” You whined, stopping Bruno in his tracks. He paused for a moment, before taking a deep breath, calming down. He was a mixture of shocked and relieved that you were enjoying this. He moved his fingers once more, leaving you to let out a small pleased moan, on the verge of mewling for your Capo.

“Don’t worry, amore, just let your Capo take care of you…” He hummed, leaving you just to whine as you thrashed around just the slightest bit.

“P-Please, n-need more. Give me more, need you Bruno, please!” You whined. While Bruno’s fingers were nice, they definitely weren’t enough, not when you could feel Bruno’s cock pressing up against you. 

“Impatient thing. What is it? Do you want me to fuck you? Do you want me to pound you until you forget your own name?” No matter what you said in response to that, Bruno could easily be able to know the answer by the way you clenched down on his fingers. But still, you answered him honestly, trying to arch up your hips to get some sort of sympathy for your condition.

“Y-Yes, please, Capo… Want to feel you so bad, I need you right now.” You whined, grinning just the slightest bit once Bruno’s fingers pulled out from inside you and he grabbed at your hips. Even if your Capo was in control, you were very apt at getting what you wanted. You let out a small sigh as you felt Bruno line up to your entrance, grinding against you. You tried to wrap your legs around Bruno in an attempt to pull him closer, over for him to dig his nails into your hips in a way that made you yelp. 

“Now now, be good. I suppose I should've tied those legs of yours too. Maybe I should stop and tie them now...” Bruno started to pull away, leaving you to cry out and thrash a bit just to bring your lover closer.

“Nooo, Capo, please. I’ll be good, I promise, just please. I need you right now…” You pleaded, leaving Bruno just to smirk as he leaned back in, his face hovering over yours just so.

“Do you promise to be good for me? Just let me take care of mio tesoro.” He told you. Although you pouted just the slightest bit, you relented and leaned your head back, doing your best to relax in Bruno’s grasp. Fine, you supposed that he could have his way this time. Bruno just hummed, taking in your submissive posture for a moment before finally pressing into you, slowly and tenderly. You moaned as you felt your lover open you up, stretching you as your own sounds wove in with his. Bruno groaned as his grip on you got bruisingly tight, his hold possessive as he tried to hold himself back from absolutely devouring you. 

“So… God, you’re wonderful. Please, let me move, amore, I want to make you feel heavenly.” Bruno’s voice was low, a breathy quality to it that told you he was using all of his effort to hold himself back, leaving you only to nod and dig your nails into your palms, looking up at your lover with watery eyes.

“P-Please, Bruno, need you… I need you so bad, I’m begging you…” Your words were enough to make Bruno finally let go of his composure just a bit, pulling out of you until just the tip remained inside, before ramming back inside of you. You mewled at the harsh feeling, Bruno taking up a slow but harsh pace as he fucked you, with nowhere to grab onto and try to find some sort of perchance. 

“That’s it, you’re perfect like this. All mine, il mio bellissimo angelo, Ti amo, ti adoro…” Bruno was practically murmuring into your ear, his voice husky and low, as if he were gasping for air while trying to fuck you. You just whined and grabbed at the sheets that you could reach, clenching them as your body clamped down on Bruno, trying to bring him in deeper, enticing him for more. You moaned, biting onto your lip as you tried to look at your lover. The way he was hovering over you made his hair fall to the sides of his face like a shroud, his lips so close to yours, yet so so far.

“I love you too, please Bruno, I love you so much, more than anything.” You told him, Bruno just smiling the slightest bit before bridging the gap between the two of you, pressing his lips against yours as his hips moved a bit faster, trying to bring the two of you closer to your eventual end. You mewled into the kiss, letting your Capo bite and nip at your lips before taking control pushing his tongue into your mouth like a man starved. You could tell that you were coming close to your end, the coil in your belly threatening to snap any moment now, but you held yourself back, wanting to finish at the same time Bruno did. You wanted to be good for him, even still.

“Mmf, I love you, please, you’re so wonderful, caro, let me finish inside you, please…” Bruno could barely pull himself away from the kiss to speak, moving back in as soon as he got his words out, leaving you to do your best to nod as Bruno’s thrusts stuttered, his nails digging into you as he bottomed out, his brushing against your sweet spot enough to push you over the edge. You threw your head back and moaned, Bruno quickly joining you as you felt a heat start to pool inside of you, the two of you grinding against each other to help ride out your respective orgasms. 

The two of you laid like that for a moment, Bruno quickly pressing his weight on top of you as he let himself soften inside of you, your own vision getting hazy as sleep tugged at the back of your mind. After a few moments, Bruno pulled out, watching for a moment as his cum dripped out from inside of you, leaving you to shudder. He chuckled just the slightest bit, pulling himself up to start to undo the tight knots around your wrists as you regained your bearings.

“Are you alright, do you need anything?” Bruno asked, his harsher demeanor melting away for something softer, leaving you just to smile as your wrists were untied, rubbing them gently to try and regain feeling.

“You.” You chuckled, moving to wrap your arms around your Bruno and pull him into bed. “We can clean up later, I just want to be next to you right now…” You mumbled. Bruno just smiled, getting cozy as you cuddled up next to him, laying your head on his chest.

“Of course, my dear. I would never deny you that.” He told you. You let your eyes close as you listened to Bruno’s heartbeat, warm and safe with your lover. You finally let sleep take hold of you, unconcerned with anything that might happen while you dreamed.

Even if you let Bruno do anything to you, you knew that he would always protect you.

[bunny-hoodlum]

Thank you so much for the tag @risemaclay-blog! <333 It's nice to be thought of. :3

Rules: Answer 30 questions and tag 20 blogs (bruh, I can't even 10 half the time) you are contractually obligated to get to know better. (My introversion is stronger than your contract. But I shall try. XP)

Name: Melissa

Gender: Female

Star Sign: Aquarius (Probably Gemini Rising? I have to go find my Birth Certificate, haha)

Height: IDK, maybe 5'2".

Time: 12:10AM (PST, GMT-8)

Birthday: Feb 5th

Favorite Bands: Modest Mouse, Radiohead, Interpol, Gorillaz, Awolnation, Arcade Fire, Built to Spill, Death Cab for Cutie, Widowspeak, Placebo, The Wombats, Brand New, Blink-182, MCR, CHVRCHES, Purity Ring, Sleater-Kinney, more and I just can't remember them right now.

Favorite Solo Artists: Oliver Tree, Melanie Martinez, Grimes, NF, Lana del Rey, Sufjan Stevens, Jose Gonzalez, Jonsi, Tune-Yards, Beth Jeans Houghton, Alex Winston, Imogen Heap, Annie Clark, Eddie Vedder, Damien Rice, Bo En, Porter Robinson...

Last Movie: Children of the Sea (unfinished), last finished was Coco on Disney+.

When did I create this blog: Jan 2020, or maybe Dec 2019, I do not recall lol.

What I post: Uhhhh, shit nothing? XD Guess fanfics and fanart, but pretty rarely. I be drifting through life, yo.

Last thing I googled: "drop that phone dream about me", I was trying to remember the band that did that song. It's Broken Social Scene "Anthems for a Seventeen Year Old Girl".

Other blogs: NONE. None else here, and I'm still not even using my IG, hahaaaa~ha!

Do I get asks: 'Tis rare! I finally got 2 the other day! <33333

Why I chose my URL: It's my fanfiction pseudonym.

Following: I couldn't find that info, lol. It's gotta be less than my follower count, though. Maybe 35?

Followers: 266

Average hours of sleep: It's sporadic, so I dunno.

Instruments: I found my Ocarina of Time Ocarina, does that count? Sadly my fingers are too small to cover the holes. Q_Q I want the fairy ocarina really, really badly now. I'm just sad that the octave wouldn't be the same. SONG OF STORMS BITCHES! It won't be the same!

What am I wearing: PJs

Dream Job(s): Oh yeah, I thought this tag game was familiar... This is my third time with this one, haha! XD I don't have a dream job anymore, sorry. :\ I am a creator/artist by nature, but lately I'm just not quite feeling applying myself anymore. I might just slip into 'mediocrity', deluding myself into a false sense of comfort by eating and sleeping and gaming my life away.

Dream Trip: I would like to go UNESCO World Heritage Sites. I would also like to backpack through Asia and throw down money in Tokyo. Ah, wait, no. I should focus on a world trip solely around food, like the late great Anthony Bourdain.

Favorite Foods: Fire-roasted everything (whole fish, whole veggies, steak), Mexican Street Corn, Lomo Saltado Linguine(?), Nachos, Chile Relleno, Stuffed Shells, Lengua, Sashimi, (Spicy) Poke, Popeyes Fried Chicken (lul), Any lemon dessert (no meringue), Tiramisu, 'Fancy' Mac n Cheese with Peas and Ham, Sheperd's Pie, Shwarma, Potato Samosas, Pho (with everything and basil and extra lime), Sinigang, Bulalo, Lechon Kawali, Shanghai Lumpia, extra rich Tonkotsu Ramen (pea shoots, butter, onsen egg, fresh garlic or black garlic oil, sometimes spicy, sometimes finished off with vinegar. Gotta be thick noods all the way), Prime Rib (horseradish and mashed po~tatas), Banh Mi, Tom Kha Gai soup... Godammit, just take me to a buffet already!!! XD

Last Book I Read: I finally finished "Colorless Tsukuru Tazaki". Apparently I chose the wrong Murakami novel to read first, whups. XD I really want to try to get through "Brave Story" by Miyuki Miyabe, but IT. IS. A. TOME!

Top 3 Fictional Universe I'd Like to Live In: How To Train Your Dragon, The Legend of Zelda... Honestly don’t know ‘bout that third one... A:TLA? Kiki’s Delivery Service? Pokemon? One Piece?? Neverland??? ^_^;;;;;

Tagging: @char-lotteral, @katarinahime, @angi1993, @twurg, @sunshinefamily, @spaciousignatius, uh, @everyone! Whoever wants to answer, go ahead! <3

[cttrajan1206]

11, 17, 18, 25, 33, 37, 44, 46, 47, 55, 75, 76, 90, 94

TEA THATS SO FUCKING MANY FOR THE HOMESTUCK THING

11 : Favourite Alpha kid?

LISTEN DONT DO THIS TO ME. I??? Uhhhhhh god i. I really love the strilondes i know its basic but they're all so good and Dirk was done way too dirty. I dont have favourites skshsjf i like Jake the least but i love the rest so much. I guess?? If i had to choose?? Roxy.

17 : Favourite Beta kid?

Uhhhh same problem at Alphas TwT the Betas get a lot more development but either Rose or John.

12 : Favourite Alpha troll?

Aaaaaaaaah this changes as i loveeeee them allllll. I am gay for Vriska but she is also an asshole, I also love Gamzee but he is also an asshole but OH MY GOD I JUST REALISED THEY'RE BOTH MURDEROUS PEOPLE WITH BIG GRINS AND THATS WHY I LIKE THEM. Ghhh I also self project sm onto Eridan when writing him and I often use Kanaya's quirk bc i love her. Nepeta is adorable and I actually like Equius. Karkat is so fun to write and Tavros is baby. Aradia is cool af and so is Sollux. Terezi is just badass af. Honestly telling u my least fav would be easier. Ok but probably like. Idk. I cant. I literally cant. Dont really like Fef much tho lmao

Also I KNOW THIS ISNT WHAT U ASKED BUT I REALISED WAYYYY TOO LATE THAT THEY ARENT BETA CHARACTERS SKDBJFT SOOO FUCK YOU

18: Favourite Beta troll?

Alright LISTEN. I LOVE KURLOZ A LOT. But also like, there's a mix. I love Rufioh ngl he's really cool. Meenah is badass af. Latulaaaaa i love her. Aranea is a flashy Serket lmao i loved her info stand. Honestly Kankri is downright funny hed be fun to piss off. Mituna is baby and Cronus needs to fuck off. Damara is funny lmaooo i dint understand a word she says but she will say it anyway XD oh but Porrim is goddamn amazing. Meulin is so cuute too.

Hmmmmm im not sure, i dont really like the zahhak of this bunch as much but the reactions to his quirk were hilarious. Its not like they all got much development other than Meenah and Aranea but i suppose... Kurloz and Porrim. The ones im gay for lmao

25 : Favourite Alternian ancestor?

Ok but i actually really liked the Grand Highblood lmao and also the Marquise Mindfang. The Dolorosa too! Hahaaaa idk ill pick the Dolorosa i liked her and her outfit.

33 : Favourite pale ship?

Oh i actually love the idea of Jadekat lmao! And I was like thinking Roxy x Sollux bc coding brossss

37 : Favourite vacillating ship?

Listen we all know I love Erikar as a flushed ship but Erisol as a vacillating ship is for me

44 : Character you'd choose to be your austispice?

Probably Vriska bc she's described as being good at it lmao im like. Only 70% certain how it actually works lmao why couldnt you have asked me the other ones qwq

46 : Character you'd be best friends with?

Oh I don't know, I love them all! Ok not all but I love so much of them!! I'd want to be friends with Calliope and Dave and Roxy and Dirk and Johnnn and Jade and Jane and Jake

Ok probably Rose and John honestly idk if anyone else would take me though i'd love to do raps with Dave XD

47 : Patron troll? Are you happy with them?

Had to look this up aksvskjf Apparently its Equius I think? Which makes sense since im a Sagittarius and honestly I love this sweaty awkward douche

55 : Beforus or Alternia?

Ahhhh Beforus has a softer meaning of culling but I haven't seen that its actually much better than Alternia and I know more about Alternia too. Honestly Alternia ig? I would likely die but hey

75 : Do you like bloodswaps? Do you have a favourite?

I've seen these one(1) occasion and it was fuchsia Karkat before i fully knew the trolls lmao. I haven't like. Really seen enough to fully say anything? But it would be cool to see the highbloods as lower ones with the stuck up sides to Equius and Eridan's personalities

76 : Do you like kidswaps? Do you have a favourite?

I dont know what this means???

90 : Favourite Homestuck AU?

My own, Macbethstuck skdhjdf but also i like humanstucks and this one fic got me into Twilightstuck lmao

94 : What would your strife specibus be?

Nunchucks and Bow and arrow likely tho i need more practice with both

[sage-nebula]

How long have you known you have ADD and what clued you in that you have it?

MMM, this is kind of a tough question.

First, as a disclaimer: This is one of two disorders I’m 99% sure I have but haven’t been officially diagnosed with, the other being delayed sleep phase disorder. I’ve been officially diagnosed with C-PTSD, chronic severe depression, an anxiety disorder, and a learning disability in math, but I have not been officially diagnosed with attention deficit disorder or delayed sleep phase disorder (the former of which because I’ve never brought it up with a doctor, and the latter of which because I’ve yet to find a doctor who believes me). That said, though, I was very sure that I had C-PTSD, chronic severe depression, an anxiety disorder, and a learning disability in math before I was ever diagnosed with any of those, so while I’m not officially diagnosed with ADD or DSPD at this point in time, the fact that I hit pretty much every symptom checkbox for both makes me feel just as sure about those two as I do all the rest. (And honestly, I would have a diagnosis for DSPD if only anyone would BELIEVE ME, but that’s neither here nor there.)

Anyway, to answer your question . . .

I honestly first started suspecting it back when I was in high school. There were commercials on TV for medication to help with “adult ADD,” and the symptoms described in those commercials (difficulty focusing, difficulty keeping track of time, procrastinating, etc) all sounded like me. Of course I wasn’t an adult at the time, but I also wasn’t a young child, like the typical person you see diagnosed with ADHD. Furthermore, the symptoms sounded very different from what I’d always been led to believe ADHD was (hyperactive, bouncing off the walls, et cetera), so I thought that I might have “adult ADD,” as was described in the commercials. That said, I never brought it up with my parents because they didn’t even believe me when I said was burnt out junior year and that was why I failed math, and instead just decided that I was lazy and unwilling to try, so. I figured there was no point in bringing it up with them.

I kind of forgot about it in the years that followed until, funnily enough, I saw some posts on tumblr where people talked about some less commonly known symptoms that fit me perfectly. I think the one that stood out to me the most (though I can’t find it now) was a post about being unable to sit in a chair properly. I’m going to level with you: I cannot sit in a chair with both feet on the floor for more than two or three minutes to save my life. It is so uncomfortable. Ever since I was a kid I always pulled my feet up onto my chair, and I never sit in one position for too long. Sometimes I sit cross-legged, other times it’s with both feet on the chair and my knees drawn up, sometimes it’s one knee up and the other cross-legged, and so on and so forth. I shift position and squirm around constantly, not because I’m hyper, but because I just can’t sit in one position for too long without feeling massively uncomfortable. There was a post here on tumblr about how that inability to sit still and properly in chairs is a lesser known symptom of ADD in women, and that made me start wondering if perhaps my high school curiosity about whether I could have ADD or not had some merit to it after all. (Of course, no online symptom sites list “can’t sit in chairs properly” as a symptom, but you know. These things happen.)

So I started to do more research online, going to different websites to see what I could find. And what I found is that Inattentive-Type ADD fits me perfectly. As a brief rundown:

Missing details and becoming distracted easily: I can be detail oriented if it’s something I’m very interested in (or something I’m trying very hard to focus on), but otherwise I do have a tendency to blaze through and skim things, taking shortcuts because I assume I already know the thing even if I actually don’t. As for distractions? Oh boy. At my old job in particular I had to have headphones and music on if I was to focus on work orders / e-mails because otherwise the noise around me was so much of a distraction I couldn’t focus on any one thing. But even then, it could not be any music with lyrics, because the lyrics would distract me and send me into daydreams before I realized what was happening! I also tend to get distracted in the sense that I can be doing one task and get distracted by another task, or can have my thoughts jump around a lot as I leap from tangent to tangent . . . that’s less noticeable in writing, but that’s part of why I prefer to communicate in writing. It’s easier to keep my thoughts organized if I have time to sort them out first.

Trouble focusing on the task at hand: Talked about this above, but yeah, unless it’s something super interesting to me, keeping my focus on one thing can feel like an insurmountable task. Like I said before, at my previous job the only way I could knock out a bunch of work orders or support e-mails at once was if I had headphones on. Otherwise? My attention would flit from conversation to conversation while I mindlessly played with my phone or went from tab to tab (without really looking at anything) on my laptop, because my attention just could not hold because it was pulled in too many different directions. It was hell. (My new job is much quieter, which is a big relief.)

Becoming bored quickly: Hahaaaa, oh my god. You might have noticed, but I’m “in” about ten different fandoms at once, usually. And this is because it’s so, so hard to hold my interest on any one thing! Like I do have some life-long interests, such as Pokémon, but even then I also have so many other things that I’m like and that I find to entertain myself with because I cannot handle boredom, and that includes being unable to handle doing the same thing over, and over, and over. Believe it or not, that was the worst part of retail for me. It wasn’t dealing with the coworkers that I hated the most, oh no. It was the sheer monotony of having to do the same goddamn thing over and over again for eight bloody hours in a row. I distinctly remember at my last retail job feeling like my brain was actually, physically rotting, and like it would have been a mercy to scrape it out with a windshield ice scraper than to continue doing that job. At least when customers screamed at me it gave me something new to say and do. When it was just another routine day at the Barnes & Noble? That’s when I wished for sweet, merciful death (and a swift one, unlike the slow one that boredom inflicts). I should also mention that at this point I have gotten up from my seat no less than five times purely because I felt distracted and wanted to walk around a bit.

Daydreaming frequently: I have trouble with long movies because I will get distracted by something inane in the movie, get taken away on a daydream trip, and then come back sometime later only to realize I no longer have any idea what’s going on in the movie. I daydream while I’m driving (though don’t worry, I can still pay attention to the road; when it comes to driving I can multitask this). I daydream in the shower, I daydream at work, I daydream while falling asleep, I’m almost never not goddamn daydreaming. Ffs, I will be having a conversation with someone and as they’re talking to me my attention will snap to something else and I’ll go off on a thought tangent / daydream. I guess that could also fit under “easily distracted” but you get the gist. My whole life has been nothing but daydreams. There are baby pictures of me where I look like I was sedated by my parents, but actually I was probably just daydreaming even then. It’s been my perpetual state as long as I can remember.

Executive dysfunction: I have trouble keeping organized, and I procrastinate everything, even things I want to do. I will want to play a video game, but instead of turning on the game I will sit here and flip mindlessly through different internet tabs because I just cannot bring myself to start the task. And again, I do this with everything! Writing, doing chores, eating, going to bed, waking up---you name it, I procrastinate it, and this is on top of not being able to keep things organized despite how much I vastly prefer it when things are neat and tidy. I had to buy myself a schedule book just so I could try to remember when my bills are due and when my appointments are (and it does help, when I remember to use it). But honestly, I could have a terrible headache, and yet actually getting up to take medicine---or just reaching over to grab the bottle that’s conveniently within reach---feels like a task I just cannot start. It’s absurd, and yet I’ve always been like this. (Ofc if you ask my parents I’m just lazy, but again, this is even with things I want to do, like video games, or getting out of my car when I get home instead of messing with my phone for ten minutes first. It’s like the gears of my brain get stuck and I just cannot get them to move.)

 Hyperfocusing: While I am incredibly easily distracted at times, at the same time when I get into something, I get really into it, and sometimes this kicks my brain into a hyperfocused state (which I didn’t even realize until recently was a hyperfocused state) where I cannot do anything else other than that task, including sleeping, eating, or otherwise taking care of myself. This usually happens with cleaning, but it can also happen with video games, with show binging, or other similar activities. Once I’m in the zone, I’m in the zone and I don’t come out of that zone until my brain has decided it has had enough / the thing is done. (Similarly, I get hyperfixations where I’m SUPER INTO one thing for a while, often churning out tons of content and such for it until it runs its course through my system. This is also when my attention to detail actually returns to me and I can remember minute details of things I love.)

And so on and so forth, you get the idea. I’ve taken a few different online tests as well, such as one I just now took that said a score of 51% or higher means that you should see a mental health professional for a diagnosis, and I scored 75%. Of course, online checklists and self-tests aren’t surefire diagnoses, but at the same time these are often very similar to the worksheets that doctors hand you in their offices. It’s not a diagnosis, but it’s something that indicates that there is something going on that you (or in this case, I) should probably have checked out.

So all in all, researching ADD and reading about the different types and how different symptoms present in different people makes me think I have it. It’s not something I thought about or fully realized until well into my adult years, but hey, at least I’ve got an idea now. (And tbh I think I have sort of a combined type going on due to the chair and fidgeting thing, as well as how fast I talk and how my mouth often has trouble keeping up with my thoughts, but still.) It also explains a lot about my childhood, adolescence, and even adult years, just like the mathematics learning disability did. It’s a missing piece to help me understand why my brain has always been like . . . this. 

At any rate, hope this sates your curiosity, anon. And if you’re looking into this for yourself, I wish you the best of luck!

[purplesurveys]

314

Thank you sindsforstyrret for sending the survey :)

1. Beyonce vs Rihanna? We are not about to ask me this question hahaaaa everyone knows me for being the biggest Beyoncé fan. Like if it was possible to have big flashing lights saying ‘She likes Beyoncé’ with an arrow pointing to me it would have already happened. Rihanna is fine and I love Kiss It Better, but I’ve just always been for the Queen B. 2. What’s your favorite horror movie? I haven’t picked out favorites, although my top 3 is all adaptations of Stephen King works - Carrie, Misery, and The Shining, and no particular order. 3. Would you say you have a high sexdrive or not so much? It fluctuates, really. If the drive is there it’s really there; but sometimes I’d get into a depressive stint and feel anxious and overwhelmed and those are the worst times to touch me at all. 4. how do you feel about swallowing pills? It has to be done sometimes so I just suck it up, but I often get the sensation that they end up getting lodged in my throat. 5. what animal is the scariest in your opinion? Cockroaches.

6. a band or an artist you liked when you were younger, but not so much anymore. Hey Monday, mostly because they haven’t put out any new material in aaaages and are as good as having broken up. 7. come with an unpopular opinion. I don’t care for Infinity War. I have had so many people shame me for this. I don’t know what good that does to the both of us honestly, it will just compel me to rub it in their face even more. 8. how often do you shop online? Just a handful of times. I don’t like spending my money for anything other than food. 9. have you ever questioned your sanity? Everyday. 10. how do you feel about people wearing fur coats? are you for or against it? I will never understand why they can’t just wear normal coats and be a normal person. 11. what’s the worst thing a friend has either done or said to you? Marielle spread out two of my deepest secrets before. Should’ve learned better after the first time, but I was a dumb 11 year old. 12. are you still friends? I haven’t talked to her in 8 years. 13. what’s fake about you? like extensions, fake nails, botox etc. My personality when I talk to people I personally dislike. I like to call it choosing to be respectful. 14. if you got the chance, would you audition for a reality show? Probably not. Have you heard about how they treat the contestants in ANTM? They’re so restricted as to what they can do while in the show and aren’t even allowed to leave the house; I don’t know how that doesn’t drive them insane. 15. what’s considered cheating in your opinion? Wow anything from chemistry-laden eye contact and beyond. 16. have you ever gotten into a facebook fight? No I fucking hate Facebook. 17. who’s your favorite youtuber? Shane Dawson. 18. what about favorite person to stalk on instagram I don’t have an Instagram because I also hate it. 19. are you a virgin? if no, how old were you when you lost your virginity? No. I was 18. 20. what’s the cheesiest thing you’ve ever experienced irl? I will always remember when Gab brought me to a restaurant for my 17th birthday, and pretended to go to the restroom when really she was asking the staff to come to the table with my favorite Oreo cheesecake set on a heart-shaped plate, with one of those candles with the regenerating flames. I never look for anything grand so that has always stuck with me. It sucks that it might not have even been genuine from her though, but that’s complicated and a whole other story altogether haha. I want to remember it for how pure it is. 21. favorite flavor of jelly bean? Dunno, don’t really get to eat jellybeans a lot. 22. do you use tinder? if yes, have you ever met up with someone you matched? I did and still do, but just to people-observe! I like seeing the people around the area and looking at their photos, but that’s literally it: pure curiosity. I have a different name, my profile photo is a cat, and no other details about me are posted, so no one knows who I am and would care to swipe right on me. 23. what’s your favorite memory with one or both of your parents? My dad brought me to a buffet once just because he wanted to take me out for lunch. I appreciate that. 24. what’s a fashion trend that you would NEVER follow? Fur. 25. you just poured your heart out to your crush and all he/she does is respond “k”. What do you respond/do? I force an answer out of them and tell them how serious I’m being. 26. what’s your favorite thing to order from mcdonald’s? Chicken and rice, although I really just wait for their seasonal stuff like Shake Shake Fries and the McSpicy since they’re way better than their normal menu. 27. when do you feel your sexiest? Welp. When I’m having sex? Haha. 28. what book/movie has made you cry the hardest? The Hours, Good Will Hunting, It’s A Wonderful Life. 29. something you feared as a kid but don’t anymore? Driving, but that’s it. Still scared of the same things. 30. how often do you shave? Every other day. 31. whats your favorite emoji? Don’t really have one, I don’t use emojis a lot. 32. do you need a hug right now? No. 33. what’s your skincare routine? I don’t have one. My skin is fine and I’m too scared to try products in an effort to maintain it, since it might just do the opposite. 34. would you rather have a snake or a tarantula as a pet? Snake. 35. think back to the worst teacher you’ve ever had. What made them so terrible? Ms. Belen was a blatant practitioner of favoritism. I still remember which students she would gleam over and which ones she would roll her eyes at and pretend doesn’t exist (i.e. me). Anyway, I kept getting my silent revenge as I used to do excellently in all of her exams. As soon as she stopped being my teacher I made it a point to glare at her whenever I had the misfortune to pass by her.

[lady-mavra]

MAVRA ANEKSI is a THREE THOUSAND PLUS year old GENDERFLUID VAMPIRE that uses SHE/HE/THEY. They are known for being DEDICATED, EVEN TEMPERED, AND PATIENT. Unfortunately, they are also known for being OVERBEARING, IGNORANT TO MODERN AMENITIES, AND OFTEN FORGETFUL.

Their face claim is MERVE BOLUGUR, and they currently live in THE SUMMER COURT as THE OWNER OF THE LIRRAHA BATHHOUSE. (NAME/AGE/PRONOUNS/TIMEZONE)*

(List any potential triggers in your character’s bio here, and if this is filling a wanted connection.)

Character Description: At least 200 Words. Feel free to include anything you can think of, including personality, personal history, family history, thoughts on the world around them, and more.

At Least Three Potential Plots for Your Character

An Educator: Mavra wants to learn about all sorts of neat modern things such as Pac-Man, Velcro, and Electricity. She attends university classes on the regular, but this person works closely with her through all her ridiculous questions and assumptions about the most innocuous items. The bra, for example, is still a source of great fascination to this day.

Employee of the Month: Mavra works closely with every single one of her employees, even the janitors. She’s worked alongside them and earned their respect and appreciation. However, this employee refuses to see her as anything but a snobbish upperclass vampire, and refuses to see anything else.

Thirst: Mavra hasn’t had anything but the blood of cattle, sheep, and goats in centuries. So when she accidentally gets a taste of human blood, things take a turn for the worse.

owner of  “'ajnihat lilrraha” one of the oldest bathhhouses still in operation that is directly connected to an abuse victim’s shelter.

an architect as she got older. arrived in the court in like. 800bce?

she’s a goddamn cat lady bc/ egypt. has 2 big cats as pets/guards. It’s gotten to hte point where she charms them to live at least 300 years bc it goes by so fast for her. Currently, she has Kaphiri/Keket the lioness and Musa the male serval

Mavra Aneksi doesn’t remember the name her mother gave her, nor indeed her mother’s face. All she knows is that she was ten years old when rough Grecian hands stole her from her gentle shepherd-daughter’s life and dragged her West.

She was

i'm gonna b honest i kind of wanna write this shit hahaaaa but ue like i imagine mavra would want to do business and things from the start because it fascinated her and she's clever and strong-willed, nd so he'd teach her to write and such and they'd sort of be partners and then the bathhouse was a passion project( she also ADORES architecture and designs buildings for fun) and he does his thing?

hoenstly tho but like not a tragic vampnot someone who's evil or smtbloodofmorganai miss himbloodofmorganaand yessspolly-kiagrismaybe she's the head of the crown and crow and she's VICIOUSLY protective of her girlsbloodofmorganaOOOOHi like itpolly-kiagrissnarky and clever and cool headed but you touch her girls she will behead you or at least hire someone to do it.and only drinks animal blood and consenting human bloodpolly-kiagrisno traumatic back story. no huge sorrows. she was born during a war and it made her hard-hearted and her plot will be idk her character development is tbd for now but she's viciously protective of her girls BUT ANYWAY GRETA PLEASE SORRY

owner of the crow and crown. 3rd owner I think? or she chould have made it herself maybe back in the year 300bc or smt and honestly like I"m thinking it's gonna be like. sold as a slave to a grecian man who fell for her happy times yadda yadda. HE got turned and so she agreed to get turned as well and they lived happily until he was killed fater about 200 and though she grieved, it's not trauma

Mavrosia/Mavra meaning black for her hair/eyes OOH or petraI I really like mavra actuallybloodofmorganawould she also teach the employees like the finer points of seduction and what notyes i like mavrasounds powerful and dangerous all at once tbhpolly-kiagrisshe would be happy to give lessons since she was a concubine. I think maybe one all over the middle east. stolen from her home (originally a celt) taken to greece, down to israel and sold to a man in egypt who let her keep her name? And the egyptian man is the one she loved(whispres rami haha)bloodofmorganaOOOOOOhbloodofmorganabut likepower coupleramiiiiiiiiiipolly-kiagrisidk if he's still around or not but likeher past is a v happy onebloodofmorganahe died tho right? her lovepolly-kiagrisbut she's just a scary personbloodofmorganai still want a rami charrie thopolly-kiagrisyeah probably hahabloodofmorganatbhhhhh i'm like getting to like male fc charries more and morebloodofmorganaidk if i'd want him as a werewolf or something else thopolly-kiagrisMavra Aneksibloodofmorganalove itpolly-kiagrisbirth name long since forgotten but probs it was spmething like Isabel or smt celticbutyou know whatbloodofmorganathese are all great decisionswhatpolly-kiagrisif her love was still alive and her hsuband was totally a scribe tbh and she'd be like. a socialite who gives to schools and has shelters for abuse victims and suchbloodofmorganamy loveeeeeeeplease do itpolly-kiagrisso the issue lies here: socialite who takes care of people or bar ownerbc at such an age I feel like she'd want to keep herself busy but also just have ALL THIS MONEY

so the city mavra and hubby (who needs a name lolllll) lived in was at war fo 2 years and mavra was pregnant at the timehubby was sent out to help generals on the front lines relay messages and such,putting him in danger.he's wounded - mortally so, and the only way to save him is by turning him mavra miscarries while he's out. she doesn't realize how closely their fates are entwined that she was turned in the same week, to save her life as well. only his sire was a healer, and hers a midwifemavra totally became a midwife after that-