#∘₊✧────── ernest goodarzi ; insight

[urdamage]

when was the last time your character/s cried?

akito noguchi has been crying himself to sleep every night for a very long time now, so it would have been last night. ever since trouble began for him in shrike heights, when his life was once again so horrifically changed, his emotions have easily gotten the better of him. he doesn't like his sister or his friends to see him cry, so he tries to keep his composure until he's alone, until he's in bed at the end of each night.

bo turner has a lot of reasons to cry, some understandably terrible, and some quite beautiful, as he's been known to so easily cry tears of joy or laughter. the most recent cause for tears were likely tears of laughter, likely as recent as a day ago, in ian and stinky's company. with everything they've been through - even the cat, who was found so cruelly abandoned before he became a turner-vogt - bo likes to just be silly. he loves to bring joy into their household, and unashamedly finds himself so funny at times that he does indeed cry laughing over himself.

desi calderon tries his hardest to not get so upset over things, though now more than ever he's also come to terms with the fact that emotions are healthy. as much as he doesn't like to cry, he does cry more frequently these days, particularly in the evenings after a long, frustrating, physically exerting shift at work, the tears aided by thoughts of deo and bodhi and everyone else he's not been able to save - that would have been the last time he cried, in a moment like that.

dodge anand understands that experiencing and feeling every emotion is healthy, particularly at the appropriate times. he's not afraid to cry, though despite this, it doesn't happen an awful lot. the last time dodge cried would have been in the aftermath of the last attack, in the ominous quiet moment that occurs after he and the rest of the hospital staff worked tirelessly to ensure all of their new patients were going to survive the night.

duckie ho would have not been able to recall the last time that he cried if he was asked this question six months ago, but the moment he had in the hospital where he not only cried, but cried in front of hoseok still bothers him. he hates to be vulnerable, and even while hoseok has never done anything to make duckie feel like he couldn't trust him, duckie still hates that he was rendered weak and vulnerable enough to cry then.

eilonwy finch is a frequent crier, she's likely crying right now. while she was able to recover from the aftermath of her own attack, a time in which she couldn't find herself able to stop crying, the past six months have been incredibly difficult for her, and she's back to her extremely fragile state. the bright side is that this time around, she has the strength of her closest friends behind her, and she's not a blubbering mess as much as she once was, despite the regression.

ernest goodarzi hates to cry, but ever since his encounter with the ghost he's found himself in tears almost every single day. even on his good days, where he gets to spend time with his best friend august, he'll come out of their time spent together in tears as the beauty that saves him from thinking about his trauma terrifies him almost as much as the killers do. like eilonwy, he's likely crying right now.

hedwig blackwood cries plenty due to his struggles and his trauma - both from the killers and his life before shrike heights - mostly in his own company, but the last time he cried was actually at a chokehold on love rehearsal. the only person outside of the band in attendance was donnie, and their front man finn found himself unable to finish the love song they were playing as he got too in his own head about his love for his soon to be husband. while hedwig laughed a lot, there were also tears shed. hedwig has always wanted to believe in love, but honestly, nothing outside of that moment has made a very strong case towards true love being, well, true.

hen wen szeto often finds themself walking around shrike heights after dark, no matter how idiotic some people might think them to be. in the day time, they don't feel comfortable with all of the eyes on them - and the ugly scar left behind on their face - and while they're not not afraid of the killers finding them again, they need to get out or else they'll be driven insane. the last time they cried was on last night's walk; their feet instinctively took them to their old apartment building, and when they thought about all of the joy they had in there with people like her brother, and galen, and the rest of those that she knew when life was temporarily so much more simple, they got all choked up about it.

iggy berman last cried around a week ago, when they got in an argument with their brother. it wasn't even about what arne had said or done, nothing to do with the circumstances in which they fought, it was simply frustration over the fact that they were fighting. iggy loves his brother more than anything; having been apart from him once before, and for quite a while at that, iggy immediately felt terrified of their relationship being anything less than perfect. he couldn't lose arne again, and while one argument is hardly the start of that, iggy cried regardless, feeling particularly sensitive that day.

jovie weaver isn't afraid of crying because she's upset, but the last time she cried was actually a couple of mornings ago, when she injured herself while swimming. thankfully it was nothing too bad, but while she was pushing herself to beat a personal best, she neglected to breathe when she needed to, and came up for air, coughing after inhaling a small amount of pool water. while trying to ground herself with the side of the pool, her hand slipped, and she hit her head on the side of it. it was painful and overwhelming enough to see her in tears, though she did recover quite quickly.

junior viana carneiro, similarly to jovie, last cried over an injury. junior is another resident of shrike heights who cries frequently, but thankfully it was over no mental pain or reminders of trauma, only an accident in the kitchen. while preparing his dinner, his hand slipped, and he cut his forearm open with a large - and unfortunately sharp - kitchen knife. he cried over fear, as he was alone and unsure of what to do, but a quick trip to perkin's and a few stitches later saw him back in reasonable spirits.

jupiter bernstein last cried out of frustration on a phone call with his mother, this morning. she always calls him in the evening her time, which is quite early in the morning in colorado; overtired and bothered by a few things that his mother had said, they got into an argument that ended in jupiter hanging up, in tears. once he was more awake and had a hot cup of tea in hand, he called her back and apologised (there are no hard feelings).

leaf wozniak woke up crying this morning, coming out of an extremely terrifying and disgustingly vivid nightmare, detailing a sicker, more warped version of the attack he had only just lived through. it happens almost every morning, though if it's not leaf waking up in tears, it's florian. luckily, the two have learnt how to best manage their upset and their pain, dealing with it all together, and with the help of the commune. each night leaf goes to sleep with hopes that the next morning will be different, though that's yet to happen.

valentine ortiz last cried a couple of days ago, through a panic attack at work. the store was extremely busy, causing valentine to try to push himself, ignoring merry's alerts along with his own discomfort, but very quickly the rush became too much, and he spiralled quickly into a panic attack. as he sat in the office, bawling his eyes out and waiting for his partner to come to his aid, valentine began wondering if it was smart to continue working at an establishment as bright and bustling as the environment in which he was attacked.

∘ ₊✧────── get to know the residents of shrike heights !!

[urdamage]

for the muse(s) of your choice: what does your muse consider their comfort zone, ie. safest place?

akito noguchi struggles to find somewhere where he feels completely comfortable, which has always been the case. typically it's wherever he can be where he knows momoko is safe and well.

bo turner would say his beloved basement apartment, where he is most comfortable in the company of ian vogt. though in all honesty, his comfort zone and safest place has always been wherever ian is.

carietta flowers has never had just one safe place, as it's wherever she can find herself behind her camera, with the lense pointed at something really incredible, something extremely beautiful.

conrad collins probably would never share this thought, though his safe place has always been in a classroom environment - a good one, with a supportive teacher, friends surrounding him and the chance to improve himself.

desi calderon would say shrike heights, as odd as that might seem during the current time. while he's not a shrike resident born and raised, this town has always been where he finds himself being most at home, and home is what makes him feel safe.

duckie ho is still working on finding that place, though currently the closest thing he has to a comfort zone or safe space would be in his apartment with his roommate and best friend winnie.

eilonwy finch made a conscious effort to make her apartment a safe space for herself, and it is there without a doubt. being able to lock herself in the room surrounded by pretty things and all of her favourite books makes her feel comforted and safe.

ernie goodarzi doesn't think he has a safe place, or anywhere where he feels especially comfortable. the closest he can get to that is wherever he can find himself as high as possible and as far away from others as possible.

junior viana carneiro will always consider his safe place to be his bedroom, a space where he lets no other people in ( unless they've gained his entire trust, which is not at all easy to do ). sitting in bed listening to his records will always make him feel best.

hen wen szeto is still working on finding a place like that again. it used to be wherever her brother was, or the home they lived in together, but she's been searching for some time since his death trying to find somewhere again.

leaf wozniak would consider the commune his safe space, but would quickly realise it's actually anywhere, as long as he's in his beloved van, the space feeling best when he's in the company of someone like orwell or ian or river.

leon barker deals with years of religious trauma, enough to make him feel uncomfortable anywhere, making him feel like he's being watched, being judged, and that something bad while come of it in the future. he doesn't have a safe space.

stevie dickinson has always and will always consider the shed out the back of his house to be his safest space. all of his best memories took place there, with his brother gabe and all of their friends. he will always cherish the space.

valentine ortiz would have once said that wherever his husband was is where he is safest and most comfortable. he assumed his place would be with his family after the loss of his husband, but after figuring that wasn't the case, he's still trying to find it.

∘ ₊✧────── get to know the residents of shrike heights !!

[urdamage]

when was the last time your muse(s) cried?

akito noguchi has been crying frequently, more often than not, of course mostly because of momoko's attack on halloween. he cries himself to sleep most nights, scared and exhausted and upset, and that was probably the most recent time he cried.

bo turner still wakes often throughout the night, pulled from his slumber as his nightmares leave him in such distress that he can no longer even sleep through them. he often cries when he wakes, so that was probably the most recent time he cried.

carietta flowers can often redirect her emotions and save herself from crying when she's upset, though the recent attacks bring up a lot from inside her and they fill her with fear. the last time she cried was over the attack on halloween, when she found out the morning after.

conrad collins cries when he's experiencing any heightened emotion, and the last time he happened to cry was after a particularly exhausting shift at work. since the attack at shrike grocers ( and the loss of two co-workers ) he's been made to work more frequently, and oftentimes after his shifts - especially if it's late and he's tired - he'll cry just a little on his walk home.

desi calderon tells people that he doesn't cry, that he's never shed a tear, but of course that's not true. similarly to conrad, the last time desi cried was after a recent shift working. he was exhausted, overtired, stressed out to the max and perhaps he had one too many to drink at julio's before he made it home.

duckie ho is another shrike resident who pretends he's never cried - though he does, quite often, and sometimes for the worst reasons. the last time he cried was when he was caught shoplifting a week or so ago. he pretended it had slipped his mind because he was in such distress over the latest attack, and not only did they buy it, but they sent him on his way with the stolen goods free of charge.

eilonwy finch is probably crying right now. she's struggled to stop since she was so brutally attacked, no matter what she's doing or where she is. she frequents the storage room out the back of donna's to cry in, and often finds herself in the sections of a new chapter that rarely gets customers looking through them so she can cry without eyes on her.

ernie goodarzi couldn't tell you the last time he cried, as it doesn't happen often. perhaps it was in high school when he was seventeen and riddled with guilt over the fact that he was hurting his girlfriend by dating her despite knowing he was gay and that he was lying to her directly.

junior viana carneiro made a real fool of himself the last time he cried recently, despite the outcome of it being quite brilliant ( it being when he and silvio officially became boyfriends ). he cried over something silvio said, cried because he thought silvio would never feel the same way he felt for him, but really he had misread the situation completely.

hen wen szeto last cried on halloween - on her birthday. she hadn't expected anything from anyone, but has struggled considerably with her loneliness since her brother passed. chai was the only person to even acknowledge wen's birthday this year, and later that night wen cried over the kind gesture and the olive branch extended. she didn't deserve it, and was embarrassed to find how much it meant to her.

leaf wozniak tried to be the strong one, tried to provide comfort and help to his best friend ian after he worked himself beyond exhaustion taking care of bo after the second attack in shrike mall, but as soon as he had dropped ian back home leaf cried for hours over it all, and that was the last time he cried.

leon barker last cried when he found out about the latest attack, as similarly to carietta the attacks bring up a lot of conflicting and difficult feelings from inside of him. he wouldn't ever tell anyone just how frightened the killers make him feel, however, no matter how many times that fear makes him burst into tears.

stevie dickinson cried only a few nights ago while watching stand by me. it's a horrible habit he has, putting on the film that hits so close to home, but in times of great stress he finds it's easier for him to let his emotions out if he prompts them with the film. it's terribly sad, but still a favourite film of his.

valentine ortiz cried - despite his best efforts not to - most recently when he was having dinner cooked for him by jude. they bonded that night in ways they never had before, talking about their personal lives, and valentine couldn't help but shed a few tears over his late husband.

∘ ₊✧────── get to know the residents of shrike heights !!

[urdamage]

why did ernest choose high scores?

ernest goodarzi honestly just wanted the chance to play games for a living. in a perfect world, he wouldn't have to work at all - but of course, that's not a possibility. instead of living his dream life of doing absolutely nothing day in and day out, ernie chose the job he thought might be easiest; and what's easier than beating snotty nose kids and their high scores? if you asked him, however, you would probably get a different reason for why he chose to apply for high scores every single time - and none of them would be honest.

∘ ₊✧────── get to know the residents of shrike heights !!

[urdamage]

which of your characters are leaders and which are followers?

the leaders are akito, carietta, desi, hen wen, duckie, leaf.

those somewhere in between are bo, eilonwy, ernie, junior, leon.

the followers are conrad, stevie, valentine.

∘ ₊✧────── get to know the residents of shrike heights !!

[urdamage]

muses of your choice: how are they feeling at this very moment?

akito noguchi has never felt worse. he’s terrified, upset, in pain ( both physically and emotionally ) and overall a complete wreck. he’s mostly worried for his sister, mostly focused on keeping her safe, but he’s not sure if he’s capable of that anymore.

bo turner is honestly feeling kind of … good. he’s still terrified and a lot less socially inclined, but he’s feeling lucky for what he has and what he has gained amongst all of the pain and terror. he’s trying to move on.

carietta flowers has felt a lot worse, and might be near the best she’s ever felt. she’s on edge and frightened about all that’s happening, but she’s lucky to have not been affected so personally by the attacks. 

conrad collins is terrified. he doesn’t do well with conflict or confrontation, and while he’s trying to maintain normality with the help of distractions, he’s feeling antsy and paranoid nonetheless. 

desi calderon is exhausted, afraid, upset and stressed - that’s all he’s able to feel currently as he’s working too hard and being too busy to recharge or recover. 

duckie ho is only slightly more concerned and worried than he is usually, though he seems unchanged and indifferent as he usually is. 

eilonwy finch is feeling the worst she’s ever felt in her life. she’s in pain, terrified, upset, concerned and paranoid. she feels vulnerable, alone, weak and clueless. 

ernie goodarzi feels quite ordinary, only diverting from being regularly calm and composed when he spends any extended amount of time sober - that leaving him with elevated levels of stress and fear. 

junior viana carneiro feels so many overwhelming feelings and emotions. he feels pain, fear, regret and terror from his attack, yet somehow at the same time he feels luck, disbelief, excitement and love for all he’s gained even despite the horrors.  

hen wen szeto is incredibly angry. she’s feeling quite lonely, quite lost, quite betrayed. she doesn’t know what to do anymore, and has surpassed fear, caution and concern to go straight to red hot rage. she feels as though only bad things happen to her.

leaf wozniak is pretending like he’s much stronger than he is, though in actuality he’s feeling incredibly drained, stressed, scared, upset and vulnerable. he feels as though he’s never been less prepared to deal with something before, he feels useless, upset and unwell overall - though he’s trying to keep positive.

stevie dickinson is anxious. so incredibly anxious. he’s not feeling good with the subject and the threat of death being so apparent, and while he’s trying to busy himself or keep his mind off of the thoughts, how could anyone possibly ignore the attacks?

valentine ortiz is still terrified, and still dealing with physical discomfort and pain from his attack. he’s feeling especially sensitive right now, especially vulnerable and in need of help, protection and guidance.

∘ ₊✧────── get to know the residents of shrike heights !!

[urdamage]

which of your characters like cold weather and which of them like warm weather?

those who like cold weather are conrad, desi, eilonwy, duckie, stevie.

those who like both perhaps an equal amount are bo, ernie, junior, leon.

those who like warm weather are akito, carietta, hen wen, leaf, valentine.

∘ ₊✧────── get to know the residents of shrike heights !!