#∘₊✧────── valentine ortiz ; insight

[urdamage]

for bo & valentine: do you have any piercings or tattoos? or any that you would want?

bo turner currently has one tattoo, and one piercing. he has a small heart tattoo ( drawn by ian vogt ) on his left butt cheek, which he got shortly after turning eighteen - unbeknownst to the artist, his partner at the time, and strongly hated by the partners he had after ian ( who he's thankfully back together with again, and for good ). he also has his right nipple pierced; he went in with the intent of getting both pierced, but the pain of the first piercing was enough to scare him out of it. he'd definitely be interested in getting other tattoos and piercings in the future, but he's in no hurry to do so.

valentine ortiz currently has no tattoos or piercings. he doesn't think that he would ever get a tattoo, because as much as he likes them on other people, even only thinking about what he could potentially ink on his body forever has him feeling far too anxious. perhaps this will change in the future, but for the time being, valentine is content with bare skin. piercings on the other hand are something that he's been thinking about more and more lately. he really wants to get his ears pierced, but his anxious nature has him in no hurry to go ahead and go through with it.

[urdamage]

for the muse(s) of your choice: what does your muse consider their comfort zone, ie. safest place?

akito noguchi struggles to find somewhere where he feels completely comfortable, which has always been the case. typically it's wherever he can be where he knows momoko is safe and well.

bo turner would say his beloved basement apartment, where he is most comfortable in the company of ian vogt. though in all honesty, his comfort zone and safest place has always been wherever ian is.

carietta flowers has never had just one safe place, as it's wherever she can find herself behind her camera, with the lense pointed at something really incredible, something extremely beautiful.

conrad collins probably would never share this thought, though his safe place has always been in a classroom environment - a good one, with a supportive teacher, friends surrounding him and the chance to improve himself.

desi calderon would say shrike heights, as odd as that might seem during the current time. while he's not a shrike resident born and raised, this town has always been where he finds himself being most at home, and home is what makes him feel safe.

duckie ho is still working on finding that place, though currently the closest thing he has to a comfort zone or safe space would be in his apartment with his roommate and best friend winnie.

eilonwy finch made a conscious effort to make her apartment a safe space for herself, and it is there without a doubt. being able to lock herself in the room surrounded by pretty things and all of her favourite books makes her feel comforted and safe.

ernie goodarzi doesn't think he has a safe place, or anywhere where he feels especially comfortable. the closest he can get to that is wherever he can find himself as high as possible and as far away from others as possible.

junior viana carneiro will always consider his safe place to be his bedroom, a space where he lets no other people in ( unless they've gained his entire trust, which is not at all easy to do ). sitting in bed listening to his records will always make him feel best.

hen wen szeto is still working on finding a place like that again. it used to be wherever her brother was, or the home they lived in together, but she's been searching for some time since his death trying to find somewhere again.

leaf wozniak would consider the commune his safe space, but would quickly realise it's actually anywhere, as long as he's in his beloved van, the space feeling best when he's in the company of someone like orwell or ian or river.

leon barker deals with years of religious trauma, enough to make him feel uncomfortable anywhere, making him feel like he's being watched, being judged, and that something bad while come of it in the future. he doesn't have a safe space.

stevie dickinson has always and will always consider the shed out the back of his house to be his safest space. all of his best memories took place there, with his brother gabe and all of their friends. he will always cherish the space.

valentine ortiz would have once said that wherever his husband was is where he is safest and most comfortable. he assumed his place would be with his family after the loss of his husband, but after figuring that wasn't the case, he's still trying to find it.

∘ ₊✧────── get to know the residents of shrike heights !!

[urdamage]

when was the last time your muse(s) cried?

akito noguchi has been crying frequently, more often than not, of course mostly because of momoko's attack on halloween. he cries himself to sleep most nights, scared and exhausted and upset, and that was probably the most recent time he cried.

bo turner still wakes often throughout the night, pulled from his slumber as his nightmares leave him in such distress that he can no longer even sleep through them. he often cries when he wakes, so that was probably the most recent time he cried.

carietta flowers can often redirect her emotions and save herself from crying when she's upset, though the recent attacks bring up a lot from inside her and they fill her with fear. the last time she cried was over the attack on halloween, when she found out the morning after.

conrad collins cries when he's experiencing any heightened emotion, and the last time he happened to cry was after a particularly exhausting shift at work. since the attack at shrike grocers ( and the loss of two co-workers ) he's been made to work more frequently, and oftentimes after his shifts - especially if it's late and he's tired - he'll cry just a little on his walk home.

desi calderon tells people that he doesn't cry, that he's never shed a tear, but of course that's not true. similarly to conrad, the last time desi cried was after a recent shift working. he was exhausted, overtired, stressed out to the max and perhaps he had one too many to drink at julio's before he made it home.

duckie ho is another shrike resident who pretends he's never cried - though he does, quite often, and sometimes for the worst reasons. the last time he cried was when he was caught shoplifting a week or so ago. he pretended it had slipped his mind because he was in such distress over the latest attack, and not only did they buy it, but they sent him on his way with the stolen goods free of charge.

eilonwy finch is probably crying right now. she's struggled to stop since she was so brutally attacked, no matter what she's doing or where she is. she frequents the storage room out the back of donna's to cry in, and often finds herself in the sections of a new chapter that rarely gets customers looking through them so she can cry without eyes on her.

ernie goodarzi couldn't tell you the last time he cried, as it doesn't happen often. perhaps it was in high school when he was seventeen and riddled with guilt over the fact that he was hurting his girlfriend by dating her despite knowing he was gay and that he was lying to her directly.

junior viana carneiro made a real fool of himself the last time he cried recently, despite the outcome of it being quite brilliant ( it being when he and silvio officially became boyfriends ). he cried over something silvio said, cried because he thought silvio would never feel the same way he felt for him, but really he had misread the situation completely.

hen wen szeto last cried on halloween - on her birthday. she hadn't expected anything from anyone, but has struggled considerably with her loneliness since her brother passed. chai was the only person to even acknowledge wen's birthday this year, and later that night wen cried over the kind gesture and the olive branch extended. she didn't deserve it, and was embarrassed to find how much it meant to her.

leaf wozniak tried to be the strong one, tried to provide comfort and help to his best friend ian after he worked himself beyond exhaustion taking care of bo after the second attack in shrike mall, but as soon as he had dropped ian back home leaf cried for hours over it all, and that was the last time he cried.

leon barker last cried when he found out about the latest attack, as similarly to carietta the attacks bring up a lot of conflicting and difficult feelings from inside of him. he wouldn't ever tell anyone just how frightened the killers make him feel, however, no matter how many times that fear makes him burst into tears.

stevie dickinson cried only a few nights ago while watching stand by me. it's a horrible habit he has, putting on the film that hits so close to home, but in times of great stress he finds it's easier for him to let his emotions out if he prompts them with the film. it's terribly sad, but still a favourite film of his.

valentine ortiz cried - despite his best efforts not to - most recently when he was having dinner cooked for him by jude. they bonded that night in ways they never had before, talking about their personal lives, and valentine couldn't help but shed a few tears over his late husband.

∘ ₊✧────── get to know the residents of shrike heights !!

[urdamage]

of your muses that have been attacked what do you think has changed the most about them in the aftermath?

akito noguchi has changed the most in how he allows others to view him. before the attack he was very insistent on appearing confident, calm, and capable, but the same can not be said for him now. of course, he still has good moments - mostly when he’s working, when he feels he must present capable and composed - but in general he’s honestly sort of a mess now. he never struggled to express his feelings or emotions before the attack, not even after other trauma he’s endured, but he has always been very particular when it comes to who he allows himself to be vulnerable around. now, since his attack - and even more after momoko’s second attack - he struggles to hold himself together and he is known to breakdown in front of even strangers.

bo turner has changed the most in terms of how he feels and expresses his emotions. growing up he was always made to feel terrible if he expressed a negative emotion, or if he was in a bad mood; because of that he learnt to either hide his negative emotions and bad feelings, or channel them into more positivity, high energy or productivity. it was always rather rare for bo to be emotionally vulnerable if the feelings weren’t good ones, but now he is much more open, much more expressive, and much more emotional. while it’s often hard as he’s so clearly in distress, learning this new level of emotional health hasn’t been all bad.

eilonwy finch has changed what she does in her day to day life more than anything else, despite her emotional state being quite different also. she has always been somewhat frightened, anxious and panicky, but that was something she dealt with and worked through for the most part throughout her life. she had gotten to a really comfortable point, but after the attack all of the anxieties, concerns and worries she used to battle came crashing back down onto her - only this time it was so much worse. while she used to go on walks, breathe in the fresh air of the mountains, see her friends in the plaza - and then the mall, eilonwy can hardly bring herself to leave her apartment to go to work. 

junior viana carneiro doesn’t feel as though he’s changed. the attack was horrific, the hardest part being his best friend almost dying in front of his very eyes, but it’s not the worst of the trauma he’s endured and he hardly feels any different. he was always a very frightened, easily scared, anxious person, so the threat of the killers has made him feel just the same as he would typically. in an odd way, however, perhaps in the aftermath of the attack he has been changed for the best. it was in bonding with silvio over their shared trauma that they got especially close, and junior is easily the happiest he has ever been now that he’s in a committed relationship with the man. with that being said, junior of course still struggles with what happened to him, but things feel endlessly better with the support of silvio.

hen wen szeto was fortunate enough to only have the quickest encounter with the jack-o-lantern killer, even while it was still terrifying and injury inducing. she hasn’t changed all that much in all honesty, she’s just unable to hide how she feels more often. while she would have previously known to choose her battles wisely, there is no more choosing; if someone irks her, or even happens to be in the wrong place at the wrong time, hen wen will absolutely unleash her anger upon them - though it’s never physical, she’s not violent like that. hen wen is so unbelievably angry. she was angry before the attack too, but now it is so much worse.

valentine ortiz has never been so frightened or so dependent in his life, that is definitely what has changed the most in him since his attack. he’s always relied on the people he surrounds himself with, but never like he has relied on them now, getting help with things such as buying groceries or cooking a meal ( though of course, he didn’t explicitly ask for those things, they were only done out of the goodness of his friends hearts ). he’s usually incredibly adventurous, active and playful, but since the attack not only has he been physically unable to continue on as he was, he’s too afraid too. he doesn’t like to stray too far from home, and the once independent man now much prefers having company to ensure he doesn’t get too inside of his own head and too frightened of what has happened and what may happen in the future.

∘ ₊✧────── get to know the residents of shrike heights !!

[urdamage]

which of your characters are leaders and which are followers?

the leaders are akito, carietta, desi, hen wen, duckie, leaf.

those somewhere in between are bo, eilonwy, ernie, junior, leon.

the followers are conrad, stevie, valentine.

∘ ₊✧────── get to know the residents of shrike heights !!

[urdamage]

muses of your choice: how are they feeling at this very moment?

akito noguchi has never felt worse. he’s terrified, upset, in pain ( both physically and emotionally ) and overall a complete wreck. he’s mostly worried for his sister, mostly focused on keeping her safe, but he’s not sure if he’s capable of that anymore.

bo turner is honestly feeling kind of … good. he’s still terrified and a lot less socially inclined, but he’s feeling lucky for what he has and what he has gained amongst all of the pain and terror. he’s trying to move on.

carietta flowers has felt a lot worse, and might be near the best she’s ever felt. she’s on edge and frightened about all that’s happening, but she’s lucky to have not been affected so personally by the attacks. 

conrad collins is terrified. he doesn’t do well with conflict or confrontation, and while he’s trying to maintain normality with the help of distractions, he’s feeling antsy and paranoid nonetheless. 

desi calderon is exhausted, afraid, upset and stressed - that’s all he’s able to feel currently as he’s working too hard and being too busy to recharge or recover. 

duckie ho is only slightly more concerned and worried than he is usually, though he seems unchanged and indifferent as he usually is. 

eilonwy finch is feeling the worst she’s ever felt in her life. she’s in pain, terrified, upset, concerned and paranoid. she feels vulnerable, alone, weak and clueless. 

ernie goodarzi feels quite ordinary, only diverting from being regularly calm and composed when he spends any extended amount of time sober - that leaving him with elevated levels of stress and fear. 

junior viana carneiro feels so many overwhelming feelings and emotions. he feels pain, fear, regret and terror from his attack, yet somehow at the same time he feels luck, disbelief, excitement and love for all he’s gained even despite the horrors.  

hen wen szeto is incredibly angry. she’s feeling quite lonely, quite lost, quite betrayed. she doesn’t know what to do anymore, and has surpassed fear, caution and concern to go straight to red hot rage. she feels as though only bad things happen to her.

leaf wozniak is pretending like he’s much stronger than he is, though in actuality he’s feeling incredibly drained, stressed, scared, upset and vulnerable. he feels as though he’s never been less prepared to deal with something before, he feels useless, upset and unwell overall - though he’s trying to keep positive.

stevie dickinson is anxious. so incredibly anxious. he’s not feeling good with the subject and the threat of death being so apparent, and while he’s trying to busy himself or keep his mind off of the thoughts, how could anyone possibly ignore the attacks?

valentine ortiz is still terrified, and still dealing with physical discomfort and pain from his attack. he’s feeling especially sensitive right now, especially vulnerable and in need of help, protection and guidance.

∘ ₊✧────── get to know the residents of shrike heights !!

[urdamage]

which of your characters like cold weather and which of them like warm weather?

those who like cold weather are conrad, desi, eilonwy, duckie, stevie.

those who like both perhaps an equal amount are bo, ernie, junior, leon.

those who like warm weather are akito, carietta, hen wen, leaf, valentine.

∘ ₊✧────── get to know the residents of shrike heights !!