#∘₊✧────── jupiter bernstein ; visage

[urdamage]

eilonwy hands noah an envelope ; the birthday card inside of it is thick , a sign of its good quality . she’s chosen it specifically from cupid’s , having stood at the birthday card section for more than ten minutes in order to choose the nicest one that resembles her friend as best as a card can . the card is a soft yellow , and the front is covered in playful illustrations of flowers , all with friendly faces smiling upwards to the ‘ happy birthday ’ written in bubble writing . inside of it , she’s written her birthday message in soft , beautiful , legible cursive handwriting . the message reads ;

“ dear noah, 

every single day i am reminded of how blessed i am to have you in my life.  i could never have asked for a better friend, a better brother.  i hope your twenty-sixth year is filled with love and joy and all of the beautiful things you deserve to have in life.  here’s to the rest of our lives spent together as the best of friends. i love you!

love always, lonnie. ” 

the card jupiter hands noah isn’t a traditional birthday card , but instead , one single piece of unfolded card containing an illustration on the front and a plain white back . instead of writing on the back of the card , jupiter has written his birthday message to noah on a piece of lined paper , which is neatly taped to the back . upon further inspection , and upon flipping the page over , the fact that both sides of the page have been covered in writing can be found . the message is written in handwriting that is scribbly and small , yet legible at the same time . the message reads ;

“ my dearest noah, 

i wholeheartedly believe that the universe had a plan when it brought us together. i could write pages and pages on how i believe you deserve better than all of the cards that the universe has dealt you, but i could write even more about how i believe that the universe has given me more than i deserve by leading me to you. i won’t.  when i turned twenty-six, i was just beginning to feel like i belonged here in shrike. angel had just started to let me perform to the sparse mid-day crowd, i found comfort in no longer running and chasing whatever mystery tickled my interest that month, and i started to feel at home in my apartment - broken lift and all. the view of the night sky from the balcony truly is amazing, almost as beautiful as the one that you helped me create in the safety of my room. i know that we don’t live in the same old shrike anymore. regardless. all i can do is hope that in your twenty-sixth year, you feel the same kind of belonging and the same kind of comfort that i found here.  after all that you’ve done for me, both before and after everything that we’ve been through, all i can ask for is that the stars guide you in the right direction so that you can find peace and love and happiness and fulfilment and everything else you could ever want.  and because i know some people don’t believe in that kind of stuff, in the universe having any sort of power over any of us (mum and dad always said i was silly for believing) i’ll also be by your side helping that become a reality in whatever way that i can.  you shine brighter than my favourite star.  happy birthday - suppose i should have written that sooner.

yours, jupiter. ”

✧ eilonwy finch moodboard 06/?? ✧ jupiter bernstein moodboard 08/?? ✧ featuring noah cohen ( @noahcohen​ ).

[urdamage]

✧ you only had to know jupiter bernstein for five minutes to discover that he was a massive believer in fate , and in the stars working to guide you to the exactly place you needed to be . he didn’t quite believe that everything happened for a reason , but his strange sort of self made spirituality had him believing that there was always something that was happening for a very specific reason . 

the killers’ attacks should never have happened , none of them , not the very first one that started with claudia and otis losing their lives , not the one that jupiter and noah had to endure together , and not the latest one that had taken place on halloween night . despite this , jupiter liked to believe that he had endured such horrors alongside of noah because they needed their connection to help each other through the aftermath . 

noah’s friendship had come into jupiter’s life for a very specific reason , jupiter would never not take that as absolute fact . jupiter had always been fond of noah , enjoying their interactions at snapshot , appreciating the clever mind that noah had that jupiter could freely question and learn from . noah was one of the last people who jupiter wanted to have to endure trauma at the hands of the vicious shrike killers , but if there was going to be anyone who jupiter had to heal with , it was noah . 

there was comfort in his presence , comfort that jupiter was so glad to have back . even though noah had left shrike , even though he had stayed away from the tortured town for some time and even though jupiter had been content with the idea of noah getting away safely , jupiter strangely found comfort in knowing that he hadn’t been attacked alone . he thought he was content with that comfort , but having noah around once more , being able to wrap his arms around his frame and squeeze him tight , now that was true comfort . 

✧ jupiter bernstein moodboard 06/?? ✧ featuring noah cohen ( @noahcohen ).  ✧ freddie’s twelve days of moodboards 03/12

[urdamage]

happy birthday,  jupiter january 01/01/89

✧ jupiter bernstein moodboard 07/?? ✧ freddie’s twelve days of moodboards 08/12

[urdamage]

✧ jupiter’s eyes were always opened wide , both literally and metaphorically . he had always been an observant person , someone who noticed the smallest details , someone who cared for the smallest details . he had been that way since he was a child , and no amount of attempted discipline had ever been able to convince him to shift his focus or reprioritise - though thankfully his parents didn’t care all that much to change him as a person . 

due to this nature of his , jupiter was always one of the first to notice fall approaching . the first sign of yellowing in the trees was noted by him , the change in the time the sun set and the moon rose high into the sky , the first taste of a chill in the air as night set in . he always saw the changes , the full processes of nature getting itself ready for winter , and he had always been in love with it . fall might have been his very favourite season , the one he was most excited for each year , the one that featured in so many of his favourite stored memories . 

fall of 1988 had been different , however . by the time the season came around this year , jupiter had been attacked by the killers that plagued shrike heights on more than one occasion . he had been left with angry , red , jagged scars along his stomach , and with a limp from the crushed ankle bones that were still confined to a moon boot . jupiter never would have foreseen him hating something so passionate when the word moon as in its title .

the trauma of both attacks endured hideously changed jupiter’s view on most things . it was a shockingly abrupt and uncomfortable transition , one that jupiter would have never been able to understand before he went through the experience himself . the once incredibly excitable man had no excitement for much of anything anymore , not for fall , not for the small details he would notice , not for the night sky that he’d gaze upon for hours , admiring the constellations that he loved most . even his relationship with space had slightly changed , and that might have been the hardest thing of all . 

if that wasn’t the hardest thing , then it was the fact that he could hardly stomach the night sky . jupiter used to love night time , when he would wander and be guided to and from his home by following the stars , but he couldn’t do much of that anymore . all he could do now was observe the stars and planets from the safety of his balcony or the safety of micah’s side ; he would rush home the moment the sky began to darken , and he would hide away as fear of the dark completely consumed him . 

fall used to be a beautiful time for jupiter , but now all he could think about was the darkness of winter that loomed overhead , that waited just around the corner , and of all of the threats that his paranoia assured him were waiting in that darkness for him . 

✧ jupiter bernstein moodboard 05/?? ✧ freddie’s thirteen days of moodboards 11/13

[urdamage]

sunk deep in the night, i sink in the night standing alone underneath the sky i feel the chill of ice on my face i watch the hours go by, the hours go by you sleep, sleep in a safe bed curled and protected, protected from sight under a safe roof, deep in your house unaware of the changes at night at night i hear the darkness breathe i sense the quiet despair listen to the silence at night someone has to be there someone has to be there

✧ jupiter bernstein moodboard 04/?? ✧ pinterest dump 08/?? ✧ see jupiter’s full pinterest board here.

[urdamage]

from indigo to royal blue i travel far but no one will do anytime, anyplace every shape every face brings memories of you

✧ jupiter bernstein moodboard 03/?? ✧ featuring arjun rai ( @alicnblues ). ✧ freddie’s rainbow of musings 06/07  

[urdamage]

it was as red as the sun in the evening sky it was as red as the fire in a panther's eye it was as red as the rose under the summer sun like a fire from a killer's gun

✧ jupiter bernstein moodboard 02/?? ✧ featuring lila bhatt ( @retrocuts ) ✧ freddie’s rainbow of musings 01/07   ✧ moodboard series inspired by @ianfm

[urdamage]

so remember, when you're feeling very small and insecure how amazingly unlikely is your birth and pray that there's intelligent life somewhere up in space 'cause it's bugger all down here on earth

✧ jupiter bernstein moodboard 01/?? ✧ freddie’s twelve days of moodboards 07/12