#*SEVERE PSYCHOLOGICAL DAMAGE*
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Im bad at writing coherent things but I need to get this concept out of my head so it stops haunting me.
I had this idea for another fic called The Undine Colony.
The setting would be the second colony by the sea- started when Sol is in their forties- the story taking place an unknown time after that.
It starts with the alarm that the original Stratospheric colony has gone silent. Collapsed all its networks, killed every signal, spirited away every colonist. As it still houses much of humanity's most advanced tech, like the servers for their holonet, essential parts of the power grid, this is an issue of extreme urgency.
And who better to turn to in their moment of need than Sol? So here they are suddenly jolted into wakefulness.
Their first thought is that they cannot feel their body. They quickly learn they are not in fact the real Sol, but only an AI copy made of their brain-scan from many decades ago. Though they cannot access the future vision as an ephemeral bit of software, they have superior computing on their side.
The gist of it being that AI Sol is now in charge of the 2nd colony to replace the hole left by Congruence, all while being tasked to figure out whats happening to the og colony & trying to reestablish contact. Aaand trying to piece together their own existence on top of it. Trying to find out what even happened to the original Sol. If they have something to do with this blackout.
So yeah, itd be slowly unfurling that mystery, piecing together the gap in their memory & issues of personhood.
#texted post#why yes I have played SOMA and it did irrevocable damage to my psychology#true pain is still being unsure if I should just spill the twists and resolutions or not#on the off chance I do end up attempting to write it after all...#bcus yes I do know whats happening uwu#and if sol is alive n what they have been up to#theres some very very fun revelations abt that in particular#also very much based on my fave greg egan stories#aka making a fucking digital copy of yourself to inhabit your smart tech#severence also has good shit like that...#torture yourself until you finally agree to live this subpar existence#one big downside to it is that itd p much be an all new cast#much of the og cast would be dead or very old and most likely stayed w the original colony#like I could maaybe get away w a middle aged nougat or smthn but thats not much to go on. n maybe some gardener contact...#getting a small dose of good feedback(even when its on an unrelated fic) sure does awful things 2 my brain like suddenly inspire me to want#to do more of it#i was a teenage exocolonist#if somebody wants to adopt this idea we can talk uwu
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sayaka what the FUCK
#On one hand: shoutout to whoever wrote/translated this its incredible and caused me severe psychological damage#On the other hand: does this mean pmmm canonically takes place AFTER among us got popular?#This Implies Things. A Lot of things.#my stuff#pmmm#magia exedra spoilers
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therapist: yaoi hands jake isnt real, he cant hurt you
yaoi hands jake:

#☆#lookism#yaoi hands jake#this panel is causing me severe psychological damage#jake kim#kim gimyung
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I feel kind of bad about doing something so petty, but each time I block a shipbrained weirdo, I feel a little lighter. And I think this will make my experience a lot better overall. I wasn’t caught up on the show until Chikhai Bardo, which is when I finally got online about it. And I’ve loved speculating about what might happen and discussing interpretations of various details and things like that, but honestly the shippers are also ruining it a little bit for me, to the point that I’m starting to feel hints of bitterness toward characters I love and relationships I’m invested in. Solely because of the dismissive, reductive, and bizarrely competitive attitudes I see shippers take toward the characters outside of their ship, and also tbh the objectification of the characters within their ship, and the horniness for the most toxic, psychologically damaging possible versions of the ship & characters. So this is the policy now. If your weird aggressive post makes me feel a streak of resentment toward a beautifully written character, well then so long, friend
#I recognize this post is also weird and aggressive. sorry. I’m just so tired of it and I hate that it affects my enjoyment of the show#inb4 someone thinks this is vagueposting a particular ship: no I’ve felt pissed if at plenty of both markhelly and markgemma fans#*pissed off#although when I talk about the frothing at the mouth for psychologically damaging toxicity I am thinking more of markhellys.#I think probably bc the fetishization of huge age gaps; weird crazy power dynamics; hypersexuality born of serious mental health issues etc-#-all tie in way too closely with my severe traumas of my teens/early twenties#and it’s fucked up bc I don’t think any of those things are actually significant factors in the markhelly relationship on the show!#like for one thing once you’re in your 30s a 13 year age gap is pretty meaningless#another side of this is ppl insistingggg that Gemma was really dead and only existed as a shell of herself. or was doomed in some other way#or that the relationship with mark was a failure. I’ll grant that the infertility issues put a lot of strain on the relationship. but also -#-every long term relationship goes through times of strain like that#but then on the other hand there are people who refuse to acknowledge that mark and helly’s relationship can possibly be meaningful-#important and real#reducing it to two children who like each other when the truth is it’s a deep connection and bond between adults#that’s love! they are in love#saying that imark should blindly follow omark and just walk into oblivion leaving his love behind#painting helly as catty and cruel#like have you even watched the show?#and either faction insisting that their ship is INEVITABLE and the only conclusion that makes sense for the show’s narrative arc-#when actually it’s perfectly transparent that the reason for saying so is not good faith analysis but rather ship motivated#BOTH relationships are beautiful and meaningful and important. that’s the point! that’s the tragedy!! is it so impossible to lean into and -#-explore that? I get that the tension that creates is challenging and maybe it feels psychologically easier to just pick a side and die on-#-that hill#idk I just think these guys might prefer something more like… The Twilight Saga maybe?#or just sports. pick a team and root for the team and that’s pretty much all there is to it!#r&r (ranting and raving)
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love how hua cheng is just like "I support xie lian rights and xie lian wrongs, except he can never do anything wrong ever even when he kills a bunch of people. Go off king" and Xie Lian is like “This is my beautiful husband, he has committed war crimes, but haven’t we all?”
And their relationship is somehow healthier than anything I've ever been in.
#emma posts#to be fair everything involving me didn’t have me aware that it was a thing#but I couldn’t compete anyway#tcgf#is it dating someone if they never told you they were dates and you misinterpreted them?#not asking for a friend#this is just straight up every situation I’ve been in#that’s as close as I’ve ever actually gotten to dating someone#I’ve witnessed plenty of other people’s relationships though#‘we’ve been dating for six months’ ‘those were dates?!’ ‘you asked me out first’ ‘and you rejected me!’ <- closest to dating I’ve been#all the other times I didn’t even ask the person out first. the just flat out never said it was a date and I thought we were just chilling#and all the other times I’ve asked someone out they rejected me and then DIDN’T ask me out without telling me they were asking me out#how was I supposed to know he changed his mind?#I’m still not over how I didn’t know we were dating until after we broke up#just the sheer comedy of my love life gets to me#comedy of errors ass love life#I’m getting really side tracked#Xie Liana’s friends were totally reasonable to think that someone stalking someone for several centuries is alarming#but somehow those two had it happen in the healthiest way possible???#I respect it tbh#only healthy relationship I’ve ever had that much sheer dedication in is me and my favorite cat which is a very maternal relationship#and i didn’t even actually kill the people who threatened him. they weren’t real threats but they knew they did psychological damage#to this day I wish I bit them until I tasted blood#but being in detention with them would have meant being around them longer than I had to be 😑#they have probably changed a lot since then but I still never want to see them again in my life#that might actually have played a slight role in how feral I get about protecting my cat 🐈⬛#I’m getting into personal issues again#our co-dependent parental dynamic. me and my cat. is perfectly healthy and I will not change it#said by someone who is not healthy but definitely will not change this specific thing#and the co-dependency is in fract mutual. that’s why it’s CO dependent
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If I learn enough about the Many-Worlds Interpretation and also add a touch of the idea of "sensitivity to initial conditions" from chaos theory, I can make an excuse to make my self-indulgent stuff of Blue Space like "what if they were in a rock band" into a series or integrate them into that eventual hypothetical series about a Blue Space Archives as bonus chapters as speculation
#transmission from the captain#(blue space is literally the “do crazy shit with science” plot device and that presents such fun avenues for fanworks for me)#(fall semester i'm going to be taking a course about specific topics from the philosophy of science and i'm excited for it!!)#(i heard very good things about the professor for the dedicated philosophy of science courses too)#(that is going to generate a lot of ideas for this)#(you do not choose the thing you're obsessed with. here i am with blue space. get me out of here)#(it's okay maybe i can get blue space as a whole to grow on at least somebody via my own personal fanon haha)#(anyway about the rock band idea- it's literally just fun but also the singer parallels have potential)#(people who are severed from their home world and one of the things they brought from earth was music)#(songs for only themselves as a memento of old joys since it was said galactic humans couldn't really enjoy life by guan yifan)#(also chu yan has a thing for reducing psychological damage with his crew so can you imagine the scenario of)#(chu yan: “we are going to make a band to ease everyone's tensions.” zhuo wen + park ui-gun + akihara reiko: “what”)#(band set up is: chu yan - vocalist. zhuo wen - bassist. park ui-gun - guitarist. akihara reiko - percussionist)#(chu yan is the vocalist to have a more direct connection with singer)#(zhuo wen is the bassist because as a science officer he helps provides the foundation for blue space's endeavors)#(park ui-gun is the guitarist to reflect a secondary leader role)#(akihara reiko is the percussionist because it would be really cool if she had drums themed after stars and planets)#(so it would mirror her role as navigator visually)#(then this all gets tied together with the philosophy of science somehow)#(speaking of chaos theory. i need to eventually do another thing i've been procrastinating on)
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i drew a furina in a modern fit :3
rb >>> like
#genshin impact#furina#digital art#artists on tumblr#i dunno why i leaned into a star motif considering she doesnt have that at all#its prob because the reference for the outfit had the stars now that i think about it#question answered immediately lol#this was supposed to be a sketch#but it evolved#in a modern au furina would be that one legendary theater kid / literature kid that tried method acting once#and took severe psychological damage from it#or sth havent done her story quest yet#i really disliked her in the beginning but the archon quest which i wont spoil really did something#genshin impact fanart#furina fanart#friendly reminder that liking does NOTHING on this website <3#ofc dont reblog it if u dont want to tho
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one of my parasocial nemeses made a yt video about qjj i’m gonna start tearing things apart with my teeth
#not gonna watch it bc i value my peace but just knowing that it exists is making me mad#soon i won’t be able to go into the tags without suffering severe psychological damage………
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you know i think dirk strider was based actually. i too would put myself in situations that can only be solved by my personal decapitation if i had the ability to revive from it
#like just imagine the possibilities#tell me u wouldnt teleport ur crush slash bff ur severed head if u could do so with no permanent damage#except the psychological implications ig but who cares#dirk strider#homestuck
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Making a cute/adorable male protagonist who is kind and incredibly caring is one of the most dangerous things you can do
#tazzykiki#if he has freckles it's over#he could have the most badass stunt-performer entrance#or break a guy's jaw with his bare hands#and he will forever be stuck in the 'cinnamon roll' category#forever doomed to an eternity of that one cursing/gasp meme#yes even if they have canonically cursed several times#and yes i have been steadily taking psychological damage for the past several weeks at an increased rate
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I just need a little haircut and then my whole life will be different.
#I'm so serious I see it in my head it looks so good I just need what I have rn to be cleaned up...#I have covid btw if you hadn't gathered that. I don't want to talk about it. but it's not been that severe for me so far#it's mostly just the psychological damage
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nick is stealing cassie away and giving her the love and respect she deserve. okay.
nick stealing the pretty tiny blonde cheerleader away from their abusive parents and loving them with his entire heart gotta be my favorite genre fr
#exiitiosus#i was gonna say kurts more resistant but i think they r both. hesitant and scared to deviate from their parents#but kurt in a scared of what his parents will do way and cassie in a scared she isnt important without them way#like she does not think she can make it on her own#whereas i think kurt Knows and Believes hes capable (even if hes not really) but hes scared of the violent fallout#where cassie just. shes not scared of it.#shes not expecting a fist thrown her way shes expecting much more severe psychological damage
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Trying to schedule a time that works for me, my (job-having) essay partner and our mentor without killing myself in the process challenge IMPOSSIBLE
#my mentor is so cold in the emails while my partner is like 'can you suggest this super specific time-slot of one hour on friday'#yeah i sure can (smashes head into computer screen)#they both want to cause me severe psychological damage im sure of it
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Anabaseios live reaction
#ff14#thorn being subjected to her mommy issues by force. bc she was never facing them otherwise#congratulations! you killed the mirage of your not-mother and gained a kinda-sibling!#and it only cost you severe psychological damage#athena also fixed her face. a bit. cant have her other main vessel walking around like that#pandaemonium#this raid did not disappoint#thank you lahabrea for all your bad choices you made with your insane dick#i get you tho
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Honestly, I think I have to stop drinking from the firehose here.
people who go through the main tags of big and tumultuous fandoms looking for new fresh good posts to reblog are essential to any circle. they’re like true hunter gatherers leaving the safety of settlement and braving the unknown wilderness to find food for the flock. they risk their lives every day and will come back with a few scratches at best and severe psychological damage at worst
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getting cheated on and dumped out of nowhere has done me a lot of good actually. for example i have started eating a lot of fruits
#the past few years i haven’t eaten a fruit even once a month#and now? for sure as much as 2 apples per day#i even ate an orange#actually i ate two#i might have retained psychological damage but at the very least you won't catch my ass developing scurvy#💪💪#i also watched arcane and then i even watched pearl yesterday too#i have not watched a show by myself in over a year and i haven't watched a movie at home in even longer#this is positive personal development#i also sat down and did some creative writing. several thousand words#this is very impressive of me. i have not written anything since like august#💪💪💪💪#🔥🔥🔥🔥💯💯#also since my best friend fucked me over i am now contacting other friends and acquaintances to broaden my social circle#this is all very positive#pickapost
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