#Acerola looks so good

[nonovyabuisness]

Halloween Sygna suits !

[vaugarde]

still awesome

[bobacupcake]

Can you do one about the Sea of Thieves water?

OK

so . there was a biiig long talk about this at siggraph one year!! you can watch that here if you'd like . in the time between me getting this ask and me fully recreating the water, acerola also released a great video about it . the biiig underlying thing they do and the reason why it looks so good is they are making a Really Detailed Ocean Mesh in realtime using something called an FFT (fast fourier transform) to simulate hundreds of thousands of waves, based on a paper by TESSENDORF

WHAT IS AN FFT - we'll get to that. first we have to talk about the DFT - the discreet fourier transform. let's say you have a SOUND. it is a c chord - a C, an E, and a G, being played at the same time. all sounds are waves!!! so when you play multiple sounds at the same time, those waves combine!!! like here: the top is all 3 notes playing together, so they form the waveform at the bottom!!

now if someone handed you the bottom wave, could you figure out each individual note that was being played? how about if someone handed you a wave of One Hundred Notes. you would think it would be very hard. and well, it would be, if not for the Discreet Fourier Transform.

essentially, there is a way to take a bunch of points on a waveform comprised of a bunch of different waves, add them all together, do some messed up stuff with imaginary numbers, that will spit back out at you what individual waves are present. i made a little test program at the start of all this: the left are the waves i am putting into my Big Waveform, the top right is what that ends up looking like, and all the little rainbow points on it are being sampled to spit out the graph at the bottom right: it shows which frequency bands the DFT is finding (here it is animated)

this has enormous use cases in anything that deals with audio and image processing, and also,

THE OCEAN

tessendorf is basically like, hey, People Who Are Good At The Ocean say that a buuuunch of sine waves do a pretty good job of approximating what it looks like. and by a bunch they mean like, hundreds of thousands to millions. oh no.... if only there was a way we could easily deal with millions of sine waves..........

well GREAT news. not only can you do the DFT in one direction, but you can also do it in REVERSE. if you were to be given the frequency graph of a noise for example, you could use an INVERSE DFT to calculate what the combined wave graph looks like at any given time. so if you were to have say, the frequency graph of an oceaaaan, for example, you could calculate what the Ocean wave looks like at any given time. and lucky for us, it works in two dimensions. and thats the foundation of the simulation !!!!!

BUT WAIT

as incredible as the DFT is, it doesn't scale very well. the more times you have to do it, the slower it gets, exponentially, and we are working with potentially millions of sine waves here

THE FAST FOURIER TRANSFORM here we are . the fast fourier transform is a way of doing the discreet fourier transform, except, well, fast. i am Not going to explain the intricacies of it because its very complex, but if you want to learn more there are a ton of good 30 minute long videos on youtube about it . but essentially, due to the nature of sine waves repeating, you can borrow values as you go, and make the calculation Much faster (from exponential growth to logarithmic growth which is much much slower, and scales very well at higher numbers). it's, complicated, but the important part is it's so much faster and the diagram kind of looks like the shadow the hedgehog story plot

so if we use the inverse FFT on a graph of a rough estimate of what frequency of waves in the ocean (called a spectrum, basically tells us things like how many small waves, how many big waves, how different waves follow the wind direction. sea of thieves uses one called the phillips spectrum but there are better ones out there!!) now we have our waves !!!!!!! we can also use another inverse FFT to get the normals of the waves, and horizontal displacement of the waves (sharpening peaks and broadening valleys) through some derivatives . yayy calculus

OK MATH IS OVER. WE HAVE OUR WAVES!!! they are solid pink and look like pepto bismol. WHAT NOW

i cheated a bit here they look better than not being shaded because i am using the normals to reflect a CUBEMAP to make it look shiny. i think sea of thieves does this too but they didnt mention it in their talk. they did mention a FEW THINGS THEY DID THOUGH

FIRST OFF - SUBSURFACE SCATTERING. this is where the sun pokes through since water is translucent. SSS IS REALLY EXPENSIVE !!!!!! so they just faked it. do you remember the wave sharpening displacement i mentioned earlier? they just take the value where the waves are being sharpened and this will pretty naturally show off the areas that should have subsurface scattering (the sides of waves). they make it shine through any time you are looking towards the sun. they also add a bit of specular ! sss here is that nice blue color, and specular is the shiny bits coming off the sun. the rest of the lighting is the cubemap i mentioned earlier, i dont know if thats what they use but it looks nice !!!!!

then the other big thing that they do is the FOAM !! sorry i lied. there's more math. last one. you remember the wave sharpening displacement i Just mentioned. well they used that to find something called the JACOBIAN and well im not even going to begin to try and explain what it means but functionally what it does, is when the jacobian is NEGATIVE it means waves are clipping into eachother. and that means we should draw some foam!!! we can also blur and fade out the foam texture over time and continuously write to it to give it some movement, and bias this value a bit to make more or less foam. they do both of these!!!

YAYYYYY !! OK !! THAT'S SEA OF THIEVES WATER!!!!! THANKS FOR WAITING ALL THIS TIME. you can see my journey here if you would like to i have tagged it all oceanquest2023

thank you everyone for joining me :) i had fun

[would-this-pokemon-be-a-friend]

Would A Mimikyu Be A Good Pet?

(It’s my birthday! So, instead of randomly selecting a Pokémon, I decided to cover my all-time favorite! I… uh… wasn’t expecting a great score.)

A mimikyu, tragically, would not make a very good pet :(

Sure, they’re pretty tiny and adore the attention of humans. In fact, I’m sure a mimikyu would love to be seen as just as lovable a pet as a pikachu (although pikachus are not recommended by this blog, see the 150 follower special post!). While you may want to make a mimikyu’s dream come true by adopting them, the risks are simply too high.

To begin with, you would need to have absolute commitment to the bit… that bit being that you are actually adopting a pikachu. At least, that’s how you need to act. That’s what you need to tell everyone you meet. “This isn’t a mimikyu, it’s a pikachu!” You see, mimikyus are so desperate to be seen as pikachus, they get violent if they believe anyone has seen through their disguise to the point of risking their own life (Sword - Busted Form)! You will want your mimikyu to be fully confident that you believe that they are a pikachu. Get ready to give a lot of panicked, warning looks at the pokémon park!

Definitely don’t try to peek under their rag! Not only will they react violently (Ultra Sun - Disguised Form), but seeing their true form is said to cause a rapid death, either from fear (Sun - Disguised Form), disease (Shield - Disguised Form), or some other mysterious ailment. Even just accidentally seeing under the disguise can be lethal: it’s said that a trainer once saw under a mimikyu’s disguise when it was lifted by a gust of wind and died that same night (Ultra Moon - Disguised Form).

To keep your mimikyu happy, you will need to make sure not only that their disguise “works”, but that it remains unmanaged. The neck of a mimikyu’s disguise seems to break fairly easily, and when this happens they often get very upset (Sun - Busted Form), working desperately through the night to repair it (Moon - Busted Form)

Though it hardly needs to be added to the equation, mimikyus are pretty dangerous when it comes to their moves as well. Moves like Slash and Shadow Claw can pose a bit of a threat, and Pain Split, as has been explained in previous posts, is pretty concerning. Remember, they will not hesitate to violently attack anyone who they believe is trying to expose their true form!

At the very least, caring for a mimikyu will be very difficult. In Adopting one, you are really taking your life into your own hands since even accidentally seeing their true form seems to invariably lead to death.

All that being said… I’d adopt one. I’m biased. I’ll take the risk. If Acerola can pull it off, so can I.

[typellblog]

Tsubasa Family - An Analysis

With this arc, we jump to an interesting point in the chronology - familiar in the sense that our narrator has already recounted its events, but nonetheless our first glimpse at his state in between his encounters with both Kiss-Shot Acerola-Orion Heart-Under-Blade and Hitagi Senjougahara. Third in this trio of life-changing individuals is Hanekawa Tsubasa, and I think if this book has one single question to answer it’s why Koyomi isn’t dating her already.

Tsukihi and Koyomi’s talk about love brings this to the forefront of the narrative. Koyomi’s clear inexperience means he struggles to realise obvious signs of him having a crush on Hanekawa, and also allows Tsukihi to eventually convince him that he doesn’t and is just overly horny instead. It’s more convenient for him. He doesn’t really want to think about confessing because he thinks it would trouble Hanekawa, someone that he couldn’t possibly imagine being into him in return. 

I find myself coming back to the thing mentioned in the prologue, the essential similarity between Hanekawa Tsubasa and Araragi Koyomi. The difference between them and Hitagi or Kanbaru, who ‘live their lives facing forward’. To some extent it’s been obvious for a while - both of them putting others over themselves, choosing to act like a good person without really believing themselves to be one. The difference, then, is in Hanekawa’s strength of will, in being someone who can, at all times, in all situations, continue to do the right thing, despite not feeling any particular attachment to that process at all.

That’s one of the conclusions to this arc. The idea that the Sawari Neko didn’t take advantage of her pity, but rather rewarded her lack thereof, acting according to Hanekawa’s will instead of its own. Her desire to be ‘normal’ is the source of all irregularity in this incident. 

Koyomi is different. Koyomi can’t help but feeling for almost everyone he encounters. He’s careless, doesn’t always do the right thing, but despite it all will end up helping out anyone.

When Hanekawa saved him during the events of Kizumonogatari, she did it in the same way as she buried the cat. Calmly, coldly, as though it was the most natural thing in the world. She didn’t pity him, she didn’t look down on him, she simply saw him as an equal. 

So we are told in this arc, but one thing left unmentioned is that Hanekawa was in love with him. 

And while that’s a story for another time, it’s also a story we’ve already seen. Tsubasa Cat. This whole time, she was building up stress from not being able to tell Koyomi her feelings, he was unable to notice because of his idealized view of her in which she’d hardly think that highly of him, and as a result, out bursts Black Hanekawa, here to settle things on her behalf. Koyomi couldn’t become her hero, so she made one herself.

Once again I find myself wondering about the chronology here. Tsubasa Cat ‘skips over’ this first incident - the central trick, that there was never a difference between Hanekawa and the cat, is elided, in favour of making Kuro more of her own character. Perhaps a result of being separated by Kokorowatari in this one? 

But precisely because of that, we have an original enough scenario awaiting us in this arc. One where Kuro fights a hundred exorcist battles against Oshino and beats him every time, with the knowledge she has from fusing with Hanekawa. One where she holds back, avoids killing him, because she’s one with Hanekawa and still feels like she owes him. One where Oshino couldn’t defeat her exactly because of the depth of that combination - it’s pointless to exorcise the cat if the human wants to do the exact same things. Oshino’s style is always to balance things out, resolve the deeper issues. But it seems like Hanekawa’s issues are beyond even his deft hand. 

Another of the things that Tsukihi and Koyomi discuss is the vibe people’s clothes can give off - regardless of whether you’re wearing black or white panties, a person’s true nature shines through. A chaste person will seem chaste even in provocative black panties, and vice versa for a lewd person wearing white. Their only mistake - confirmed when Koyomi gets a good look at what Hanekawa is wearing early on - is to think that a person’s nature can be only lewd, or only chaste. This is a realization he talks about in Tsubasa Cat. Good people aren’t always good because good things happened to them. Sometimes one’s circumstances are so bad they have no choice but to be good. It’s not black or white. Good people sometimes act badly, too. Hanekawa Tsubasa is both. At the same time. 

Look at her reaction, when Koyomi exposes her. He has her briefly talking without the cat puns, confirms she does at heart have the same impulse to help him. She ‘showed no signs of guilt’. There’s no disconnect. Is there anything more Hanekawa Tsubasa than ‘seeming oddly cheerful’ while standing in front of your crush wearing only your underwear? She acts normal even in the most abnormal situations. 

The point of the Sawari Neko’s tale in the first place is that the cat and its victim are one. A virtuous person buries a cat, starts acting weirdly, is presumed to have been possessed by a spirit, but turns out to have been just doing that on their own. Just because they’re superficially viewed as a virtuous person doesn’t mean they won’t act out. It can make it more likely, in some cases. 

The way Oshino puts it, ‘turning out to never be a cat at all’ would be the worst outcome, it would leave Hanekawa stuck like that, in cat mode, permanently. It’s why he’s so worried about not finding a cat in the grave that it was first buried in, and why Koyomi nonetheless finds that the cat is there when the incident is over. Oddities, after all, are a way of shifting responsibility, something that we blame when we can blame nothing else. Rather than reckon with the fact that Hanekawa simply had the desire to do those things all along, we find it easier to resolve things by saying a cat made her do it.

This isn’t just a convenient excuse for Koyomi, who doesn’t want to think badly of her. It isn’t just a convenient excuse for Oshino, who completely failed in his role as a specialist here. It is, perhaps most importantly, a convenient excuse for Hanekawa Tsubasa, who, despite being fully conscious the whole time, still pretends she’s bewitched by a cat. 

That’s what Koyomi shouts to her. You’re still you. Stop trying to pretend you’re something else. Stop pretending that you’re weak-willed enough to get bewitched by a cat. Stop acting like your human vulnerabilities work as an excuse to become something entirely inhuman. Your life sucks, it really does, but trying to work off stress by attacking people isn’t going to change it.

This whole Black Hanekawa thing doesn’t really work if she allows herself to consciously acknowledge she’s putting on an act, because then she would realise the conflict between it and her usual maxim of always doing the right thing. Perhaps that conflict is what results when Kokorowatari separates her from the cat and it lashes out at her psyche?

But for that moment, Hanekawa writhing on the floor, unsaved even at the cost of Koyomi’s life, there’s a further interpretation I want to advance here. Koyomi shouts at her. He’s a bit cruel, a bit unsympathetic. Some of it’s his true feelings, no doubt, but he’s also trying to make her angry, get her to attack him. It seems to work. “Just die.” She repeats it for over two pages - only to reveal that at the end she’s referring to herself. 

We talked about vampirism as a representation of Koyomi and Kiss-Shot’s suicidality during Kizu. We mentioned that Hanekawa dealt with similar issues, but not how her oddity plays into that. Because in Tsubasa Cat it really doesn’t. But here there’s a whole other layer to it. If Hanekawa isn’t freed from the cat’s control within 10 days, it will become permanent. There will be no choice but to kill her. 

Does Hanekawa know this? She is the cat. If we take that seriously for a moment-

“Farewell. Go have a happy life.” the cat says to Koyomi when she leaves after meeting him at school.

“I will disappear after I hunt another five hundred people.” I? Who’s I?

The pain after being struck by Kokorowatari - in Tsubasa Cat, Koyomi says that everyone that the cat attacked was for Hanekawa’s sake, even herself. Here he says the same, that it can’t just be the cat’s random whim, because it’s been consistently and completely on Hanekawa’s side this whole time. 

Because when she picked the cat’s dead body off the ground she didn’t pity it, didn’t feel sorry for it. But she is the cat. When Koyomi shouts “There isn’t anything sorry about us, is there!?” is he talking to the cat, attacking Hanekawa, or Hanekawa, picking the cat up from the side of the road?

The Sawari Neko. Meddlecat, curse cat, whatever you want to call it, the pun is in the verb sawaru - to touch. Touching her will drain you. It will curse you. Regardless of her will. Because the cat, because Hanekawa, doesn’t know about her own power. She doesn’t know everything. 

The way Oshino puts it, Hanekawa’s parents are her fault. She acted in such an abnormally perfect way that they were unable to face her. Frankly if you’ll allow me to insert my personal opinion for a moment I think this is fucking stupid. In the anime you can pretend it’s just how Oshino puts it, but in the novel the narration makes it clearer you’re supposed to take him somewhat seriously. Hanekawa really did curse the people around her, purely through proximity. She ruined the chances of them becoming a proper family.

For that reason, as the cat,  she pushes Koyomi away, saying he’ll be cursed on contact with her. However, it’s too late. He’s long since been bewitched by the cat. So much so that he wants to die of it. 

Is it such a stretch to imagine that Hanekawa might feel the same? Someone like me, who curses everyone I touch, I should just die.

Koyomi’s rant, then, takes on a different tone. He’s desperately begging her to accept her current life because he doesn’t want her to throw it away.

Go on, say ‘I only know what I know’ like you normally do, because there’s still so much in the world you have to learn about.

He says this while dying himself. The question we had at the start, why a relationship between them wouldn’t really work, beyond Hitagi’s interference, seems obvious to answer now. Both of them keep so much to themselves, take everything on themselves, save everyone but themselves. This is the only place their relationship, on its own, could ever end. A mutual suicide. 

It takes Shinobu’s intervention, just as it did in Tsubasa Cat, to save them both. That similarity makes the difference so much more obvious. He doesn’t ask for her aid out of an understanding of the value of his own life. From start to finish, he refuses to believe that Shinobu actually cares enough to save him.

We might ask, as we did with Tsubasa Cat, about the placement of this arc. It’s fundamentally kind of odd, the ordering of the rest of the series aside, to put the two like this, having to recap the start and end of this one to fully explain the other.

I can’t fully answer that question. But one thing I can say is that Bakemonogatari couldn’t possibly have ended with Tsubasa Family. 

And that's all for now. Hanekawa stocks are rising a lot for me this time round. I barely remember what happens in Neko Shiro so that should be fun.

[moonlight404-translates]

A3! Mikage Hisoka | SSR - Mankai Feature | Translation

————————–

Disclaimer: Neither English nor Japanese is my native language, but I did my best with the translation. If you find any mistakes, feel free to tell me. By  the way, Director’s name will be Izumi.

Today’s Star: Franz / 1

Hisoka: …Ahm. …Nom, nom…  Passerby A: Come on, Puu-chan. Let’s go.  Dog: Woof!  Passerby B: Good afternoon.  Passerby A: Ah, good afternoon~.  Hisoka: (A person is walking a dog while an aged person is taking a walk…) Middle schooler A: Hey, why don’t we play some games later?  Middle schooler B: Sounds good! I’ll leave my bag and then go to your house! Hisoka: (Teenagers are walking home from school. They seem happy since it’s still early in the afternoon. Maybe they could leave earlier after finishing their tests today.)  Hisoka: …Ah, there are no more marshmallows.  Hisoka: …It feels warm today since the sun came out.  Hisoka: (It’s a shame not to take a nap when it feels this nice, but… I should get in soon.)  Tsumugi: And up… Ah, Hisoka-kun, you were here. Hisoka: …Tsumugi? Tsumugi: The director is calling you. Can you come down?  Hisoka: Mhm. I also ran out of marshmallows, so I’m going now.

Izumi: They came.  Tsuzuru: You could find Mikage-san.  Azuma: Was he in the attic?  Tsumugi: No, he was on the rooftop.  Guy: I see. The weather does feel pleasant today.  Hisoka: …Did you need something, director?  Izumi: Yep. We have the results of your supporting character survey.   Hisoka: Supporting character survey?  Tsumugi: Yeah, it’s part of the project where each troupe member will stream a short spin-off story of their side characters.  Guy: The supporting character is decided with a fan survey. The results of Mikage’s character survey have been tallied.  Hisoka: Aah… Izumi: Then, Hisoka’s character will be—.  Izumi: Franz from “Nocturnality”! Azuma: Franz, huh? A mysterious aura enveloped him, which made him the perfect fit for Hisoka. Tsumugi: I agree. Since his hair color and ethereal atmosphere are similar to Azuma-san’s, the relationship and setting of Reo and Franz were convincing.   Tsuzuru: He didn’t have much time on stage, but he was an appealing character.  Izumi: Yes, yes. You can understand why the fans chose him. Don’t you think so, Hisoka—.  Hisoka: Zzz… Izumi: H-He’s sleeping…  Tsumugi: Now that I think about it, he mentioned he ran out of marshmallows earlier.  Azuma: If that’s the case, I have some marshmallows for him. These are some tasty marshmallows I ordered not long ago.  Hisoka: …Ahm. …Yummy.  Hisoka: What were we talking about?  Tsuzuru: About the spin-off.  Izumi: I called you because I thought you could discuss with Tsuzuru-kun any request or idea you could have since he’s here.  Hisoka: …I don’t have any.  Tsuzuru: It can be a small thought or a simple word.  Hisoka: Hmm… Hisoka: …Franz is a vampire.  Izumi: Uh-huh.  Hisoka: So he might like cranberry jam marshmallows.  Tsuzuru: …I can’t say for sure, but maybe not.  Hisoka: Then… strawberry and cherry marshmallows.  Tsuzuru: That’s the same.  Hisoka: Acerola marshmallows… Tsuzuru: Aren’t you just mentioning red fruits flavored marshmallows?!  Tsuzuru: Sigh… It’s clear that Hisoka-san is not interested in anything besides marshmallows…  Hisoka: That’s why I said I don’t have any.  Azuma: Fufu. Well, he ate red-looking marshmallows for Franz’s role study.  Hisoka: I’m leaving all the spin-off content to Tsuzuru.  Tsumugi: It’s a shame not to request anything when you have the chance…  Guy: But that’s just how Mikage is.  Hisoka: I’m not good at that. I prefer acting to thinking.  Izumi: Then, we’re leaving the screenplay to Tsuzuru-kun.  Guy: Got it. But if you have an idea later, do tell me.  Tsumugi: That’s right. You might not have any ideas at the moment, but you can get some after rereading your script.  Hisoka: My script… 

Today’s Star: Franz / 2

Hisoka: The “Nocturnality” script… Where was it…?  Homare: I’ve come back—.  Homare: Oh my, are you looking for something, Hisoka-kun? Hisoka: I’ll play Franz for the next spin-off, so I’m looking for the “Nocturnality” script…  Hisoka: But I can’t find it. I give up.  Homare: How could it disappear when you have so little?!  Hisoka: Maybe I put it somewhere or threw it by mistake…?  Homare: Oh, dear. I’m sure you just took a quick look and didn’t search it properly.  Homare: I will give you a hand. It would be a problem not to find it.  Hisoka: Not really. I just tried to look for it because of Tsumugi’s advice, but there’s nothing important written on it.  Homare: I’m sorry, but that’s not a reason for me. Now that I know the story, I’ve gotten interested in it.  Hisoka: …I’m counting on you, then.  Homare: You’re counting on me?! 

Hisoka: … Hisoka: (It doesn’t feel warm when the sun starts to hide… but the sunset today is pretty.)  Hisoka: …Ah, Kumon and Azami are back. Hisoka: (Kumon is rubbing his stomach while Azami is giving him a look. Maybe they ate ramen, and Kumon overate?)  Hisoka: (...Yuki and Muku came back too. That bag… aah, they went shopping at a craft store.)  Hisoka: (It looks like the director is going somewhere. She must be going shopping for dinner.)  Hisoka: …She’s all cheery. We’re having curry tonight. I hope she makes seafood curry or bean curry.   Hisoka: (Ah, Tasuku is back. …And Arisu is telling him something?) Hisoka: (From what I can get… he might be asking him to join the script search.) Hisoka: (...I already left the script search to Arisu, so I should think at least something about what Tsuzuru told me.) Hisoka: (What did I think when we had the vampire performance…? I didn’t have my memories back then…)  Hisoka: …Ah, Chikage. Hisoka: (He came back earlier than usual. He’s holding a department store magazine in his hand...) Hisoka: (His business meeting should have finished earlier, so he bought souvenirs in a department store nearby.) Hisoka: (Judging by the paper size, there might be cream puffs for some people inside…)

Chikage: —   Hisoka: Ah, he saw me.  Hisoka: (Chikage, come here for a bit.) 

Chikage: …Sigh.  Hisoka: (He’s sighing. But that means he will come.)

Hisoka: …You’re so slow. Chikage: Is that what you say to someone who came to the rooftop after returning from work for you? …I’m going back.  Hisoka: Wait. I want to ask you something.  Chikage: What?  Hisoka: I will play Franz from “Nocturnality” for the supporting character spin-off story.  Hisoka: Tsuzuru asked me if I had a request for it, but…  Chikage: You left everything to Tsuzuru.  Hisoka: … Chikage: So I’m not wrong.  Chikage: …Then? What do you want to ask me? I’m just telling you, I can’t help you come up with an idea.  Hisoka: …Tell me, how did I create a “person profile” in the past?  Chikage: A “person profile”? Hisoka: Before, I needed a detailed profile to become someone else. I’m sure I did the same for Franz.  Hisoka: Maybe if I remember how to do that, I will get an idea about what to request for the story…  Chikage: Isn’t it faster to look at the script you used back then for it?  Hisoka: …I lost it.  Chikage: You…  Chikage: …Just what you’re doing now.  Hisoka: What I’m doing?  Chikage: Just like this, you watched people from a high place.  Chikage: But well, the fact that you’re still doing it means you didn’t do it just for the mission, but because you liked it, don’t you think?  Hisoka: …Now that you mention it, maybe it was like that.  Hisoka: (Even when I lived like a shadow, I would gaze at the people on the road and imagine their background and life…) Hisoka: (Maybe I wanted to feel like I was a person living in the same world by putting myself in their shoes…) Homare: He-y, Hisoka-kun!  Homare: Ow, ow…!  Tasuku: Hey, don’t overdo it. Come on, are you losing muscle?  Homare: How rude. That’s not happening to me.  Hisoka: What’s the matter?  Homare: Look, we found your script.

Today’s Star: Franz / 3

Izumi: Are you ready, Hisoka-san?  Izumi: Ah, is that the main story script? I heard you lost it, but it seems like you could find it.  Hisoka: It got mixed up in Arisu’s bookshelf.  Izumi: I see. I’m glad you could find it.  Hisoka: Mhm.  Izumi: Did you have something written in your script?  Hisoka: Well—.  Tasuku: Hey, Mikage.  Homare: Hisoka-kun, it’s almost time for the show.  Hisoka: Okay.  Hisoka: …Director, I’m leaving the script with you.  Izumi: Sure. See you later! 

Izumi: (At the rooftop of a high-rise building… Under the moonlight in the night sky, Franz is looking down at the humans.) Franz: “...”  Businessman A: “Yes… yes… I’m very sorry about that…! I will confirm it promptly. Businessman B: “Apologizes for the burden. Thank you for your understanding.”  Man A: “Ah, ha, ha, you’re all wasted~”  Man B: “Hum, hum~♪ la, la, la~♪”  Izumi: (The bustling red-light district and a savage business district. Two opposite districts—) Franz: “…People will change just as countries and times do. And yet, the scenery these days has been the same. How boring.” Franz: “Pain and joy, sorrow and happiness, wealth and poverty are next to each other. Sometimes they hate, and others they love.”  Franz: “Humans, rejecting what is different and yet accepting and coexisting with them—”  Franz: “But for them to accept us who live in the dark…”  Franz: “...It doesn’t matter now.” Franz: “Very well, I should start searching for my dinner. Hmm… which corner should I choose…?” Franz: “...Ooh? The men in that building…”  Izumi: (Inside a building in the business district, Franz finds Kota and company. He eavesdrops on their conversation.)

Nonomiya: “Hey, Seto. Tonight… do you want to go there?”  Kota: “There?” Nonomiya: “Where else? A place with beautiful ladies!”  Kota: “Sigh, quit that and move your hands. We have to catch the last train.”  Nonomiya: “Tch, you’re a moodkiller. Okay, okay, I get it.” 

Franz: “Hmph, that blood seems neat and easy to drink.”  Franz: “The other looks like it has a good nutritional balance but might be a little thicker. It’s hard to pick one, but my choice for tonight is…” Franz: “---!”  - A red moon appears - Franz: “...I can feel the smell of a fellow’s blood. Is it from the town where I resided until not long ago?”  Franz: “...Aah, this is the work of an exorcist.”  Izumi: (Franz senses an exorcist has hurt that vampire from a distant town.) Franz: “Those foolish humans who chase us to eliminate us since ancient times…” Franz: “Aah… tonight feels good for something thicker and bitter, with a piquant touch…” Franz: “I’m craving blood mixed with despair and rage. Exactly, something like—” Franz: “The blood of an exorcist…”  Franz: “When was the last time I drank blood like that? 70 years ago, no, two years ago… wait, it was three days ago…”  Franz: “...I forgot. When someone has lived this long, it’s inevitable to forget things.”  Franz: “However, the taste is unforgettable.”  Franz: “A church exorcist— The blood of the Fonsu clan was exceptional…!” Izumi: (Franz’s eyes shine enigmatically with an expression filled with fascination… It feels mysterious and frightening but at the same time charming.)  Izumi: (Hisoka-san is so impressive…) Franz: “Those two look delicious, but I will leave them as emergency food.” Franz: “Tonight, why not have something from that corner—” Izumi: (Franz, who is getting ready, exchange looks with Kota, who suddenly raises his head.)

Kota: …  Nonomiya: “Seto? What’s wrong?”  Kota: “Nothing… it might have been my imagination.” 

Franz: “Aah…”  Franz: “...Wasn’t that one my fellow’s emergency food?” Franz: “But— eat him soon. The time for him flows differently than ours.” 

Izumi: …Yes, that was perfect.  Izumi: (That’s right. The script Hisoka-san entrusted me… has something written, right?) Izumi: (Ah, there’s a memo. “I like to watch people”...)  Izumi: I see. So that’s the reason for this content.  Izumi: (But aside from that, there’s nothing else written…)  Izumi: (...Hisoka said that he needed a lot of details to get in character back then. Now that I think about it, when did he stop asking for that?)  Izumi: (Around this time might have been when he started to become the actor “Hisoka Mikage.”)

Tasuku: Hey, don’t fall asleep as soon as we finish.  Hisoka: I’m out of marshmallows…  Homare: Oh no, the marshmallows are in the dressing room…!  Izumi: …That has never changed, though.

[your-local-uwu-artist]

wip dump :3

evil art style! my art style has quite a lot of range but I decided to default to chibis for this. I also didn't want to like, just draw one character bust up like i see most people do for it, so I wanted to come up with a way to show multiple characters on one page in an appealing manner

sonic drawing practice! I've been procrastinating this one because the lineart I've done so far on it is almost too good. I'm not sure If i can keep up the standard set

jame-joe doodles! really wanna keep developing this concept: I think it has decent potential! i don't remember how much I've shared about him but i don't think i've talked about it much beyond the base premise. Jame-Joe is inspired by characters like Dipper and Wirt, he's clever, is serious and studious in the pursuit of his goals, can be rather emotional and is prone to cowardice and insecurity, but can be determined when push comes to shove. I set myself up for a challenge here, as I want him to be expressive but limited by his doll body. It's a fun challenge though!

more 'i should start an etsy' drawings. i've seen people make like 'gacha blind bag' keychains and thought of the idea of those with aimaina-chan designs!

fdanfsdjk I almost feel bad for spoiling this one because I'm so excited to share it!!!! But i guess the sorta person to read through this post probably don't mind spoilers lol. I realized 'Timmy's a 2000s kid' and decided to go ALL IN on that. I dug deep into my memories and decided this kids going to need rainbow looms, slap-wraps, silly bandz, and those rubbery braclets where theres one white segment and one black segment and i have no clue if this is true but when i was a kid everyone always said the white segment was snow from mount everest and the black one was like sand from the bottom of the ocean. anyway! I had so much trouble wiht finding the right shade of pink that if i go trhough making a youtube video on these designs you guys will definitely here my color theory rant.

my main goal i can only describe as 'arcade carpet'

he thinks he's cool but knows he's lame. I gave him a fnaf shirt also, i dived deep into my brain as asked myself 'what graphic t-shirt from hot-topic would timmy turner wear' and i decided on fnaf because i think it's funny. so far these extra outfits have been going up in the amount of projection I'm doing. It started with spongebob's sweater vests, continued with Dannys stereotypical-transmasc fits, and now I'm lowkey just drawing stuff I've worn (actually danny's fit with the flannel I've def worn before but like, i assigned timmy a sanrio character(i gave him keropi because it's an easy way to incorporate green accents into his design lol)) anyway!!!

i had 'i want it that way' stuck in my head again and turned to queeries he proceded to give me the solution of chipi-chipi-chapa-chapa. this was not a solution obviously but whatever. i decided to use my new problem to animate myself dancing. sure. why not. if I upload this to youtube i think i should title it 'me at the function' of course i don't actually go to any functions so perhaps 'me when i' would be more fitting

Haku with his starter! the shy kid to eccentric adult pipeline

more of baby Haku! weird part-mimikyu child wandering alola before discovering ghost-type communities and being like 'finally! someone that doesn't look at me weird when i mention demonic possesion!'

with the timeline I'm going with Haku's younger than Acerola so she's like a big sister to them :3

He stares at you with his big ol eyes awkwardly lowkey steals your malasada and gives you a flower in return

rf4 art!!! I love rune factory enough that I own a throw pillow with vishnal on it >:3

frey my fucking beloved!!!!!! lest is here too also. btw frey is a demigirl and lest is a demiboy this is true you can trust me

sketch design for one of those cd keychains with alvin and the chipmunks!

I plan to caption this '1k notes and I voice+animate my yumehoshi beam' as a bit, not because i want 1k notes, but because 99% chance it won't get 1k notes, but if it does then it'd be a really funny way to break my shyness with sharing my voice to the internet

smurtsune miku smurf my BELOVED

need more character for this btw!

[cure-icy-writes]

Pokémon sun and moon has a positively fascinating motif of women in caretaker roles and I adore it

We’ve got Lusamine, who positions herself as not only a mother but a savior to all who accept her love. Then Plumeria, the only member of team skull who knows how to clean her room, who seems to look down on her grunts as cute idiots to protect. There’s Acerola, the tiny big sister with even smaller little siblings.

It’s a bit of a stretch. But if you include the role of Kahuna, then you have Olivia, who lacks children of her own but cares deeply for the trial goers. And then Hapu, who was actually denied the role at a young age and had to take some time to grow up before she was allowed to take on that responsibility. And to be clear. I think it’s a good thing! Hapu reads as a mature teenager with dwarfism to me, and the Tapu seems to have protected her from the worst of the parentification that inevitably comes from such a role. Acerola wasn’t quite so lucky.

Anyways. Then we get Lillie. She’s forced to take charge of a Pokémon she doesn’t really want. She doesn’t dislike Nebby, but she also doesn’t show any particular affection for it at first. She wants to send Nebby home and be done with it. It’s only after her outfit change that she talks about being a hero and savior to it, and she doesn’t want to be a savior like her mom. It’s because other people in her community have saved her that she wants to return the favor. Her love doesn’t exist in a vacuum. It’s something she had to earn.

[tunas-universe]

BEHOLD. URS HEADCANONS!!!! (Plus Rhi) Starting from the youngest to the oldest :]

Zossie

Age: 10 (PLC), 11 (USUM), 14 (Alolarc)

Birthday: 3-18-2244

Family: Fyna (adoptive mother), Janae (adoptive mother), Dulse (adoptive older brother but not really her adoptive older brother???)

- Zossie is a rookie, yet a prodigy when it comes to her duties. She’s the youngest known Scout to date.

- Her parents abandoned her as an infant on the doorstep of Ultra Corp, she was found by Phyco and was in his care until Fyna and Janae, being unable to summon a baby (that’s a whole can of worms I’ll explain later), legally adopted her.

- She has diagnosed ADHD

- Despite being very tiny and younger than all the other Ultra Academy students, she somehow managed to gain the respect of most of the other students, she’s also pretty popular for becoming a Scout at such a young age

- Zossie is obsessed with ground type Ultra Beasts, explaining why she likes Diglett so much

- In my version of USUM, all four of the sillies go to Alola, she ends up befriending Elio/Selene, Hau, and Lillie, she became friends with Lillie while they were staying at the Aether Foundation.

- She eventually becomes a trainer, catching a Diglett, Alolan Raichu, and Togedemaru, she likes electric types

- She also makes friends with Acerola and Sophocles

- Zossie ended up replacing Tray in Team 14 after his death

Rhi

Age: 14 (PLC), 18 (PoGo)

Family: Unnamed mother, unnamed sister

Birthday: 9-5-2240

- Rhi is a demiboy, they use he/they pronouns but prefer people using they

- They actually joined the Go Recon Squad a bit before the Alolarc, they wanted to try something different

- They actually are friends with Zossie, and was part of her and the PLC players team for the Ultra Games (another can of worms)

- They were taken in by Professor Willow as a guest as they do their studies on the Pokemon of our dimension

Dulse

Age: 21 (PLC), 22 (USUM), 24 going on 25 (Alolarc)

Family: Zandr (father; deceased), Nadira (mother; deceased), Vycas (twin brother)

Birthday: 5-31-2233

- holy shit

- He gets his resting bitch face from his mother and his lack of emotes from his father, he is also autistic 👍

- His childhood from 12-15 was pretty damn traumatic, he still has trouble processing it sometimes

- When he was 16, his brother ran away, leaving him alone, Phyco introduced him to Fyna, Janae, and Zossie and they essentially became his surrogate family

- Shit happens in PLC, but uhhh he loses a friend :( but he gets his brother back :)

- In my rewrite of USUM, Dulse and Soliera do not fucking trust Lusamine or Faba with Necrozma or Cosmog at all

- A group of Team Skull grunts tried to hassle him once, he looked at them, they ran

- He is like crazy good at making food, which he gets teased for by Zossie (even though she’s always the one asking him to make something), he also is just the mom friend and a massive himbo behind his RBF and lack of emotions

- He catches a daytime Lycanroc, Alolan Ninetales, Ralts, and a Gothorita, plus the Naganadel he has prior to USUM

- This man goes out in 90°+ weather in a FUCKING HOODIE, HE DOES NOT KNOW HOW TO DRESS FOR THE WEATHER (he and Irida are twinning)

Soliera

Age: 22 (PLC), 23 (USUM), 26 (Alolarc)

Family: Phyco (father), Marza (mother; disowned), Tulip (gf :))

Birthday: 11-29-2232

- Yes. I HC her as Phyco’s daughter.

- On the other hand, her mother, Marza, was a toxic model with toxic expectations on her daughter, Soliera was forced to look pretty whenever she was with her. She always wanted to be a Scout though.

- Phyco won custody over her when she was 15, Soliera would disown her mother after the events of PLC, realizing that she’ll never change

- She threw herself into things like sports, friends events, and her studies, she was a model student

- She can be a bit brash and easy to jump into things, she got into alot of fights in high school

- Soliera fucking hates Yungooses, they tried to chase her when the URS first went onto Melemele, the player had to help her

- Yes she’s dating Tulip bc I thought the vibes would be cute :) plus she learns that there are models with healthy and non-destructive mindsets out there unlike her mother, she’s sapphic asexual btw

- She travelled to Paldea within the period between USUM and the Alolarc, which is where she met Tulip and also added a Ceruledge to her team, which consisted of Nighttime Lycanroc, Alolan Sandshrew, Bisharp, and Toxapex

- She’s the opposite of Dulse where she is atrocious at cooking, she was left in charge of dinner once and gave the entirety of Team 14 severe food poisoning and the latter came back horrified

Phyco

Age: 58 (PLC), 59 (USUM), 62 (Alolarc)

Family: Soliera (daughter), Marza (ex-wife)

Birthday: 8-6-2196

- He helped establish the Ultra Academy and also the Expedition Program :) he also used to work with Xerosic (before his comically evil scientist arc)

- He stopped aging at 59, he’s pretty young compared to elder Megalopians, he also had Soliera at 36, he and Marza were older parents

- Phyco is involved in lots of important missions, due to his status on the Captains Council, which is how he took down UNIVations, rescued Dulse and Vycas, got involved in the Vantablack conspiracy, went to Alola, went BACK to Alola…

- He starts consulting Burnet about Ultra matters instead of Lusamine due to the situation with Lillie and Cosmog giving him and the others a bad vibe about Lusamine

- Phyco has an assortment of Alolan shirts, goes Mantine Surfing, and eats an ungodly amount of Malasadas he’s turning into beach grandpa

- Do not threaten his posse of weird cats (the other three) he will find a way to smuggle a school of Tynamo in your water tank

- He doesn’t really battle, but he owns a Furfrou, Alolan Persian, and a Naganadel just in case

- He tells the stupidest goddamn stories and they always make Soliera die inside

[dark-frosted-heart]

Now that it’s not the middle of the night, I can properly look at Ikevil and Koibaku’s collab cafe menu items

Harrison - Strawberry milk (true or false?) with a mint leaf and monaka wafers in the shape of fox ears

Liam - Rosehip tea and gummy paws

Alfons - Soda with cotton candy and blue curaçao syrup you pour over and watch the cotton candy dissolve so good luck trying to take pics of your drink

Roger - Apple juice in the style of beer, dried peas snack, monaka wafer in the shape of glasses

Ellis - Grape juice with orange jelly and mixed berries

Victor - (cursed) coffee with rose-shaped sugar cubes. Drink and you will become a part of Crown

Enomoto Takeaki - Tieguanyin tea and bean snacks

Hijikata Toshizou - Acerola juice with plum syrup and mint

Ii Naosuke - Genmaicha with red bean monaka

Milk tea with a random suitor’s emblem

William - Hamburger steak with fresh blood (Demi-glace and red wine sauce)

Jude - Nuggets and fries that Jude’s not going to eat so you eat it instead

Saito Hajime - Breakfast of grilled mackerel, rice, miso soup, lotus root

Kido Takayoshi - Omurice with a Japanese-style savory sauce, bamboo shoots, and peas

Kirino Toshiaki- Sweet potato curry

Elbert - Deep sea jewelry box dessert that’s blue jelly, Bavarian cream (or yogurt bavarois?), crushed biscuits, white chocolate, edible pearls, and a dried orange

Katsu Kaishuu - Matcha ice cream parfait with mochi, candied chestnut, red beans and a cherry

Saigou Takamori - Dorayaki, dango, vanilla ice cream with Japanese black sugar syrup

[resharc]

a recap on jam

It's been a few weeks since I finished the Acerola Jam 0 (check out the jam if you haven't, there's a lot of cool games!) and I've had a bit of time to decompress and think about my experience. I also was literally unable to do this until this week so hahaaaaa.

If you haven't already, please check out my game jam game, Gunmatic Aberration. Some of what I'm gonna go over will make more sense if you've played it.

but maybe you like having no clue what I'm talking about, in which case, read on

A Summary

This was a good experience and has given me a good bit to think on for the other game. Which is both good and bad: part of the reason why progress has seemingly stopped is because of this. I've been working on stuff behind the scenes and polishing up bits (and rethinking others) to show off later.

I'm happy I was able to release a project that people could, you know, play. From start to finish, with very few bugs that soft-locked or broke the game. People found it fun too, which was a plus.

However, there's a few things that were problems and I'm unhappy with:

The game is confusing to play without any guidance; there wasn't obvious enough signposting or tutorials, which meant I had to tell people how to play (this is not a good sign).

The balance isn't great: some rooms are too hard. Others are too easy. Some powerups just suck, others are too good.

The boss doesn't take advantage of the core gimmick.

The presentation is lacking.

The last one is the thing that stings the most.

The Problem Of Visibility

In the three weeks the game has been around in the jam, my game was viewed 52 times, downloaded 19 times and rated 4 times. I posted it a few times and passed it around my friends. Around 6 of those downloads were from my friends. These are, by all means, not bad numbers. Someone on the Acerola discord found that the mean number of ratings is around 4 - so I'm perfectly average.

Part of this is just due to there being over 900 entries. Part of it is luck. A lot of it is because the game fundamentally doesn't catch your eye. My visual competency is, well

The biggest problem, I feel, boils down to marketing. Let's list a few problems with Gunmatic.

The game looks like a flash game made in 2008. This isn't bad but there's a stigma against those games.

The thumbnail does an awful job at describing the game and getting people to click.

The screenshots are confusing without context and frankly, suck.

The title sucks.

Part of this is just my own general competency. I am not a good artist by any means. This is something I struggle with constantly - I can, at best, make nice-ish looking animations and use some basic tricks to make it look a bit smoother. You can see this in a lot of my other clips. I also suck at names (honestly, my other game has some awful names...).

Focusing on GA, I could've done a few things better here. The easiest ones here are, add a gif to the screenshots and make a better thumbnail. I've done a quick mockup below of what that could look like (note i spent like 5 minutes on this). I could've used the gif in this very post on my screenshots screen too.

Getting People To Play

The second hurdle was actually getting people to play the game. It's one thing to get people to click, but how do you get people to actually play it?

I had a click-to-download ratio of about 3:1. That's, all things considered, not that bad! However, getting people to actually download your game, in a game jam with 958 entries, is difficult. Why play this flash game you need to download when you can play MEGA CHESS, which looks like a Real Game that you can play in your browser?

It probably would've been smarter if I'd just exported this to HTML5 and embedded it into the browser. This would've reduced the hurdle to play significantly: a lot of the most popular games in the game jam were, expectedly, browser games. And games Acerola had boosted (hint hint haha jk unless..........?).

Playtesting

This relates to my other issue: a lack of playtesting. by people who weren't me, i mean.

This is probably one of the hardest problems I've faced - both here and in my actual game. Unless you have friends who are into game development, it's hard to get someone to sit down, play your game, and give you their thoughts on what works and what doesn't. It's a fairly significant ask of someone! They have to play it for a bit, understand how it works, suffer through any problems, and then formulate their thoughts.

I developed Gunmatic Aberration over 2 weeks while working full time. I had a lot of dead time to fill in those two weeks - I should have been bugging my friends for their opinions and telling me what sucked and what didn't.

I didn't do that often.

This, above everything else, is what hurt the game the most. The game is fun, but it's incredibly unpolished and has more potential than anything else. The randomness of the game hurts it (it's a roguelite, after all): you can effectively just Die if you get a difficult room without the right powerups. It's difficult to figure out how to play without explicit instruction. These are all problems born from the developer being the only person to play it.

This is slightly just anecdotal, but I believe the top games in the Game Jam are both made by exceptionally talented people who also had some people giving them feedback. Maybe some more than others - but there was a conversation that I didn't have until the last few days.

i guess thats it?

So! That's what I did for about half a month in March. Then I went on a holiday and have been ruminating on this since.

You might be asking, "wait a fucking minute, you haven't posted anything since... November! What the hell! What have you been doing for the 4 months prior!"

That's cause, uh

um

woah check this out

[banette-appreciation]

What does Banette think of the different ghost type specialists from each region? (Ryme, Agatha, allister, acerola, etc)

Depends the Banette! Here is my personal ghost specialist opinions though: Agatha is THE og ghost lady so gotta have respect for her, although as someone who is personally a huge pokedex enthusiast her dislike of them is ehh to me. Although to be fair, with Hisui showing written pokedex existed before her and she's just solely being bitter from Oak not battling her anymore adds interesting context.

Morty I also have respect for being the first ghost type gym! I like him more than Agatha because in Pokemon Masters EX he has a mega Banette so it shows he has very good taste in pokemon and his gym was just limited by there only being few ghost types in gen 2. His personal style though really throws me for a loop. Never understood why he always had that headband as i'd associate that more with fighting types. His gen 2 sprites and remake sprites give him great style, but his Stadium 2 and Anime looks... no. Come on, let him keep black shirt and the coolest scarf ever, there's no need to change that classic spooky vibe. Phoebe confused me as a kid because I expected her to be a water type trainer with her outfit looking like a hula danger, and didn't know of how she's more likely based on Polynesian/South East Asian spirit channelers or Shaman. The difference between what I expected from her and what her team ended up being though ended up being so freaking cool to me, just being so cheerful and fun-loving as one who ended up communing with ghost types compared to other channelers and ghost type trainers of previous generations was just so neat. Just getting to break from the stereotype, and I like that.

Fantina is okay, never really left a big impression on me. Like I just had Phoebe already break sterotypes so her being this glamourous contest girl just was okay? I get her hair is like the x mouth of a drifblim, but it just looks kind of silly to me. Plus her gym is just simple math questions, why? Like I get it's good to help educate kids and such but for a ghost type gym challenge it feels so random, that's the kind of thing i'd give to a normal gym or something maybe. I heard platinum's was better but since I've never gotten to experience it that's where my bias is coming from. She's had Banette in a few of her teams so I can respect that, and it's a very interesting choice how all of her pokemon are female no matter the team. Just a very feminine girl never stood out to me as a kid, someone who was very tomboyish.

Shauntal is so very cute, I love her! May have been a fictional crush for a while as a young teen. Besides the large black collar in her outfit, everything else about her is such good aesthetic to me! And she's literally a Ghost Writer, I love it so so much! Also another ghost girl using all female pokemon, very interesting. Plus the fact she's very much left handed is such a cool detail about her.

Acerola is adorable, just so sweet and playful. Loved how she helped Lillie in the games. And even though I prefer the original sun and moon to the ultra games I am glad the ultra games gave her banette. Also the Mimikyu asthetic in her looks is so peak. There isn't an outfit of hers that i've seen that I dislike, she's just so adorable. Would adopt her as my own child haha.

Speaking of children I would adopt in a heartbeat, there's Allister! I want to give him a hug, precious little thing. I actually got pokemon Shield specifically so I could battle and encounter him.

Last but not least Ryme is THE COOLEST. Like from her hair resembling a skeletal arm down to her cool shoes, she is such a boss! I wish we could actually hear her rapping in the games, her representing rap culture in such a cool way makes me very happy. And like in the academy's library, a book says that a childhood pokemon of hers passed away. She brought all her grief into a song which resulted in her pokemon being reborn as a ghost type, how freaking cool is that? Just the feeling of love and mourning being so powerful, resonates with me. Plus her doing double battles! And even starting with Banettes! Always gonna love and remember my banette vs hers in my playthrough, it was so cool.

[whentranslatorscry]

Hitagi Honeymoon

020

“The Sleeping Cat at Nikko Toshogu Shrine is said to be the work of the legendary sculptor Hidari Jingorou from the Edo period; however, this is more of a legend than a historical fact, Araragi-kun. There's no definitive proof, and we don't even know for sure if Jingorou himself even existed. He's akin to the 'what do you do if a bird won’t sing?’ idiom, or the Sanada Brave Ten. Even if we knew they didn't exist, we can't deny them anymore since it's been woven into the fabric of our history—living and dying in people’s hearts. In this sense, the artist seems more supernatural than the carved cat itself. The sleeping cat has a tangible existence while its creator doesn't seem so real. Does that mean human beings exist, but God doesn’t?”

“Really? You know everything.”

“I don't know everything, I only know what I know.”

“How come you know things I don't when you're supposed to be my inner Hanekawa?”

“Maybe you learned it while studying for exams? Or the information about the World Heritage site in the guidebook unconsciously caught your eye and you just forgot.”

“I see. So that's how my memory palace works. You pick up the things that I've overlooked. That's how I've managed to break through the civil servant exams and the surprise inspections at the FBI Academy.”

“That’s quite a creepy learning method. I wouldn't recommend that to exam takers.”

“Pretty harsh. The real Hanekawa is much kinder.”

“Isn't that kind ‘real’ one actually more like a supernatural phenomenon? Even if it were eighteen years ago, a serious glasses-wearing girl with braids is simply a stereotype. It fits perfectly.”

“Come to think of it, I felt like I was playing the role of a 'friendless, talentless, mediocre dropout' in high school.”

“From the outside, you looked genuinely scary, like a delinquent. No exaggeration. Just like you were afraid of everyone, they were afraid of you too. People thought you'd someday cause an incident.”

“They were that afraid, huh? That’s kind of a shock.”

“Maybe that's why Senjougahara-san, having her secret held, went into such excessive self-defense mode— oops, she's not Senjougahara-san anymore, is she?”

“……”

“Sorry I couldn't attend the wedding. I'll just call her Hitagi-chan. I'm one of those 'your name doesn't matter' types, but I do like to respect the person.”

“So, it's not about individuality, but the individual?”

“That's right. All I wanted was a family, more than a name, but I'm not sure if my dream has come true or not— that's something only the real me can determine. Not the inner me who lives within you, Araragi-kun.”

“The real one's nowhere to be found, and it's not just her name; she’s wanted on an international arrest warrant.”

“Wow, that's quite the accomplishment, isn't it, me?”

“Honestly, part of the reason I got into the FBI Academy might be due to the connection to the real—once-real you back in our teenage years. The connection's still alive.”

“I think that's different. It was because of your skills, Araragi-kun. You chose substance over name. It's not good to attribute everything to me—maybe it's best if we put an end to this kind of talk.”

“Because it's weird?”

“It can't be pleasant for Hitagi-chan, right?”

“Even if you try to erase everything, even your name, you can't just erase the impact you've had on me. That spring break—if you hadn't been there…”

“If I hadn't been there, you might not even have met Shinobu-chan in the first place. Oh, strictly speaking, it was Kiss-Shot Acerola-Orion Heart-Under-Blade back then… Let's just call her Kiss-chan.”

“Don't just shorten it.”

“Giving something a cute nickname can be a way to dispel any sense of caution or fear towards it. It's similar to the way that the nine-tailed fox has been turned into a character. On the other hand, there is also the approach of elevating its status by giving something an ominous name, like Killing Stone.”

“Isn't there that saying that a rose will still bloom beautifully even if it's not called a rose?”

“True, but it wouldn't be blooming as a rose then, would it? Just like how we don't call all plants from the genus Rosa a rose. The name itself may not matter, but how we are addressed by others does matter quite a bit.”

“So is that why you've abandoned your name? Because how you're perceived by others is important to you?”

“That line of thought might lead to a fascinating discussion, but I shouldn't keep the newlywed Hitagi-san waiting at the marriage shrine. Let's switch tracks like that trolley problem you mentioned, and I'll be the one run over. During spring break, if I wasn't around, you would have never met Kiss-chan— you wouldn't have offered your blood to a vampire or become one yourself, so you wouldn't have needed saving by me either.”

“Then she wouldn't have eaten anyone either.”

“That's true, at least not in front of you.”

“……”

“Well, I think it's good to occasionally ponder over that issue, like an exercise of sorts. Even though we all— myself included— faced a shared tragedy, we eventually found happiness. So, it would be a shame to diminish the significance of that struggle. However, to play the revolutionary, we're living in the future created by that very battle, asking ourselves 'what was that fight all for?'”

“I'm not talking to you as the revolutionary, but as the class president. Always.”

“Ah, yes, you’re still living your high school days, forever.”

“I'm twenty-four. Always a repeater.”

“Always in the middle of youth, then. Certainly, the idea of adopting Shinobu-chan, not Kiss-chan, as a daughter is not only far-fetched but revolting, and something that only an immature teenager could get away with.”

“But isn't it still better than being a slave?”

“I wonder. It depends on what Shinobu-chan wants. As a princess, a king, and even a god at one point, if Shinobu-chan wishes to be a slave now, I would think that we should respect her wish. Didn't Gaen-san feel the same way?”

“Perhaps it's my ego. Wanting to make her my daughter when she wants to stay a slave is just like keeping her alive despite her death wish.”

“If you're trying to change the setting for future compliance by making her a daughter instead of a slave, that makes sense. So if we adopt that logic, it would be impossible to forgive her for her lengthy period of eating people.”

“……”

“But if you just want to make her your daughter because Shinobu-chan is cute, adorable, and lovable, then that's not ego. It's love.”

“Love?”

“That's your style of confession in English.”

“Well, I'd say that's more Hitagi's style… But in katakana, it’s got a different flavor.”

“Would you prefer I pronounce it as ‘lav’?”

“Flavorful…”

“Isn't it clear that the ideal Hanekawa Tsubasa you envision would nonchalantly declare such embarrassing hypocrisy straight out in the open, without a trace of shame?”

“Hmm, I'm not sure. It feels like the Hanekawa in my memory is somewhat unclear.”

“Is that a good thing or a bad thing? If your plan to adopt a vampiress was disrupted systematically because you remembered that in the past, she had committed sins, that's some kind of cancel culture, isn't it? It's not because you've grown up, but rather, a decision that properly aligns with the times. This judgment sounds even more immaculate than spring break Araragi, doesn’t it?”

“…You're saying I’m more fastidious now than my high school mentality?”

“I can't be sure, but I've happily thrown myself into the revolution because I wanted to be a dirtied white cat. However, as your inner Hanekawa, I can't even begin to imagine the thoughts and feelings of 'Her.' I don't know everything, I only know what I know— and that's what I don't know.”

“……”

“But, Araragi-kun, I think you know. You’ve been closely attached to Shinobu-chan for years, even more so than her name, constantly observing her as if under some form of probation. If you believe it’s safe for her to be your daughter, then that judgment is probably correct, even if that's not necessarily the 'righteousness’ you want.”

“…That's only right for me, isn't it? But I'm aware that just because my inner Hanekawa is telling me what's convenient for me doesn't mean that it's true—rather, as my inner Hanekawa, I was hoping you’d offer a more critical perspective. Being assured that I'm right only makes things harder, to the extent that I almost wish I could summon my inner Oikura to refute it all outright. I mean, my body isn't just my own anymore.”

“Mm, mhm.”

“I have a family now, and a responsibility to my family.”

“Are you talking legally? You know there’s no righteousness in the law, it exists only to be enforced. In the grand scheme of things, it all started when Hitagi-chan chose to abandon her family name and adopt yours, like the beginning of a home drama.”

“A home drama, huh?”

“Maybe a legal drama. About law. Yes, it’s fascinating. But Araragi-kun, could it be the other way around?”

“Eh?”

“I mean, you may feel a sense of guilt now, as if torn between a lifelong partner with whom you wish to share your future and committing to the dark legacy of a legendary vampire.”

“I wouldn't go so far as to call it a dark legacy, or even if I don't feel that way, it’s kind of like I’m starting to. I think that turning sin into common property is somewhat, well, imposing.”

“But isn't that the opposite?”

“Opposite? What's opposite?”

“I don’t know everything, and I’ve never been a god, so I struggle when asked about anything and everything, but as for this, it was a resounding success that you asked me, not Oikura-san. It may even be something that only I—now non-existent, ”Hanekawa Tsubasa“—can say. A sentiment that only I know.”

“Sentiment?”

“It's not a law, not a rule, not anything that requires memorization. So, isn’t hesitating to involve the element of Shinobu-chan— an aberration and a child— in your and Hitagi-chan's relationship, which you have sworn to the gods, not wrong? After all, chronologically speaking, the relationship between you and Shinobu-chan came first.”

“Ah.”

“Don’t just go 'ah.' It was Hitagi-chan who intervened in that master-servant relationship later on. Yes, just as smoothly as she slipped in between you and me back in our third year of high school.”

“……”

“I like Hitagi-chan and we remained friends ever since, but I'd be lying if I said it didn’t bother me— it bothered me so much that I became a monster.”

“……”

“Originally, shouldn’t you have tried to persuade Shinobu-chan instead of Hitagi-chan? Even before deciding whether or not to adopt her, you should have consulted with her first, even when proposing. You must have known that you had to gain Shinobu-chan's permission before even asking Hitagi-chan's father. It's just like how you can't neglect the cat you have when welcoming a new one. After all, it's incredibly late to realize that your body isn't just yours alone anymore. You've had a blonde little girl with you all along.”

“……”

“As the inner Hanekawa Tsubasa that you envision as ideal, I can say as many shameful and hypocritical things as I want without batting an eye. However, Hitagi-chan must never be made to feel that way again. You cannot allow guilt from sneaking in, whisking you away like a thief in the night, to dictate your new married life. It would be preposterous. You mustn't let Hitagi-chan feel for a single moment that she stole you away from Shinobu-chan— right?”

“…As always, you really do know everything.”

“But of course— I don't know everything.”

I simply learned what it feels like to be the one left behind.

From someone, who shall remain nameless.

Prev Chapter | Next Chapter

[crystalelemental]

It's that time once again, lads.

EX & 20/20 Current 5* powerups: 255 Current spirits: 890 5* powerups available: 49 (20 lodge, 5 event, 4 CS, 20 exchange) Spirits available: 340 (85x4 CS) Total powerups: 304 Total spirits: 1230

We can afford a decent amount at this point.  I've realized I can spend powerups down to 150, to match the 500 spirits for 10 EX in a pinch.  So let's call it 9 available.

This month's acquisitions will include...Penny and Valerie. Sylveon Supremacy.  I am not sold on anyone else.  I've talked myself out of Roxie and Ryuki, I don't care about Piers or Elaine at present.  I may go for the Eevee tier scout.  Two guaranteed Eevesi along the way is nice, and if I roll one of Selene or Elio, I'll get the other at pity.  I don't know if I'll EX them, it really depends on how I'm feeling about it.  Since Valerie is already 20/20, we can get up to 8 others.

Rei - Really strong Fighting damage, Hisui bias, etc.

SS Silver - My Ice roster is basically "Irida."  I should aim to boost that, and I like Silver and Sneasel well enough.

SS N - Frankly a terrible idea, I don't really respect him, but he is fun when I break him out. That said, meta shift, 15k Master Mode may not play so nice with him.

Ethan - If I decide to go hard on the Fire High Score event. Which I'm already backing out of.

Eevee Lucas - Same as Ethan, but also, Eevesi. He is the Only Good Flareon, so tempted.

Lodge Calem - Fennekin is baby. Also Fire High Score I guess, but mostly the baby thing.

Classic Blue - I use him semi-regularly thanks to the Roxanne/Lodge Steven comp. But as an off-type, that one is in Major Danger with the meta shift, so I'm not exactly sold on it.

Alder - Bug game is weak, I think it'd be nice to have a stronger Bug Man around, and I like Volcarona well enough.

Anni Steven - Maybe one day.  I legitimately do want to do this one day.

Relevant Support Roundup:

Lana - Still not really feeling it.

BP Morty - Kinda unnecessary.

BP Surge - Helps his Gauntlet survival but I hate using him.

Lodge Blue - Don't really use him outside of Gauntlet.

Lodge Elesa - Don't really use her outside of Gauntlet

Lodge Raihan - Really don't respect it.

Nita (20/20) - I'm considering just because I've been F2P focused, but I don't like Nita or Lando, so...

Lodge Morty - Actually does see use, there's an argument to be made here.

Lodge Acerola - Less frequently used than Morty, but still sees play.

Lodge Adaman - Not actually good, but Eeveelution and Hisui.

Lodge Leaf - I've found more opportunities to try with her, but also I feel like Penny just walked in and knocked her teeth out.

The 20/20 I have a few pairs that are sitting at 20/20, and would just cost spirits.  Given that I have enough powerups for 9 EX but enough spirits for 14, this may be worth looking at.

NC Marnie - Intensely unnecessary but kinda funny. Compresses Fiery Wrath.

SS Ethan - Also super unnecessary given he's 1/5, and Aeroblast doesn't even compress.

Victrier - I don't like Victor, but he's a free Field pair for Ghost, and I do like Spectrier. The recent Galar battle got me thinking about investing after all.

CANDY SITUATION Strike (4)

Petrel - 2.  I mean.  It's worth considering?

Rose - 2.  He gets a lot stronger with it.

SS Ethan - 2.  Full sync privileges, if that's a thing we care about now.

Honestly, just hold.

Tech (2)

SC Ingo - 2.  Bug nuke man with MPR.

BT Leon - 2.  I did EX him, and Dragapult has grown on me tremendously.

I'll likely do BT Leon, but at next datamine when I'm certain it's safe.

Support (2) None!  Amazing.  If I lucky pull H!Phoebe I'll consider it.  "What about Pen-" Penny will cooperate or so help me god.  I am done with it always being the support that goes bad.  Just one month without needing Support candy, Penny!  JUST ONE!

General (19)

Rei - 2.  He's really strong, so this is a fairly sane investment overall. And Hisui, so you know, regional bias.

The Eevi - Okay, this is a big one.  I hoard.  I hoard so bad I have 19 of these general candy sitting in my lap right now.  I have not used one...almost ever.  That's a problem.  I stockpile so I can avoid disaster, but at the point I can also just hand all five of them candy and probably still be over 10, we've reached the point I'm being ridiculous.  I am willing to candy them.  If I crack for Elio and Selene, I'm not going for the other Eevee scout and risking another disaster, I'm just using general candy.  This shit ends now.

Cake Situation I have a Tech and a Support. Exactly nothing with these effects interests me right now. Holding. As for the potential for another Strike cake from Penny, I don't feel like anyone needs it. Akari's sync isn't that great, she's had no problem with DPS, and I sure as hell am not giving it to Penny. Hold all cakes.

LEVEL 150

Nemona - I don't use Nemona all that often, but that's a failure on my part, not hers.

Drasna - I love Drasna, I feel like I need to. Maybe if I shower her with affection, she'll show up off-focus.

BT Leon - My recent ScarVi competitive streak got me really hooked on Dragapult. I love that funky Ghostie Dragon.

SS Diantha - A little hesitant, but it is Diancie.

NC Serena - Considering because Serena and this is her best outfit. Hesitating because Greninja.

Bede - Look. We all need to accept that I like Bede.

Anni Skyla - Tornadus Therian is one of the only good djinn forms, and I really like her 3/5 kit.

SS Serena - I feel like it just makes sense but it's hard to justify.

Kahili - I like never use Kahili anymore but she was a big focus for a while there. Maybe when she gets EX.

Shauntal - Shauntal did get EX and I really like her DPS sets so I'm kinda tempted here.

Kris - Kick you apart, now even harder.

Clair - Favoritism.

Iris - I like running things that are bad.

Penny - Sylveon is good, and I like it.

[bluerosesburnblue]

I asked you this question one other year, but... Are you planning to do anything for Halloween this year? And if so, who/what are you dressing up as? And if not, what would be your dream costume for this year?:)

I'm probably going to do the same thing I always do, which is help my parents out with their big Halloween display and managing the foot traffic to the house, assuming it's as busy as it usually is. Because of that, I don't usually dress up for Halloween because I need to wear something that's comfortable for long periods of time and easy to maneuver around the display pieces in without potentially catching on fire and/or catching on and ruining the display

Not that I don't wear anything special, it's just usually orange shirt + black pants and jacket, usually with pumpkin socks and glow-in-the-dark ghost earrings

If I had to pick a dream costume, though... I guess it would probably be the KHUx Halloween outfit

I've always really liked this one. Maybe I'd modify it a bit to be more of a vest/shirt + pants thing than a dress + tights thing since I'm not a huge fan of skirts, but I really like the color scheme and the fact that it's technically a reference, but such an obscure one that I could get away with wearing it without a million people asking me what it is

Acerola's Halloween Mimikyu outfit from the Pokemon Masters mobile game is a good second choice, too. It's got a very similar aesthetic, kinda has more of the pants vibe that I like, and while it's more specifically from a certain fandom due to the Mimikyu hood, it has a lot of other Halloween-specific elements going for it that keeps it from being just a standard character cosplay. And it kinda demonstrates what I meant with the vest/shirt thing

I prefer my Halloween costumes to have more of a Halloween look to them rather than just "dress up as X thing/character," so those are my picks

[zponds]

The Genie Team S9EP023 - “Zachery’s New Genie Friend” (part 4)

(start of script part four)

With the tour resumed, Hunter and Ellie lead me back to the gymnasium, and once there, we see a girl doing some kung fu. Grant shows up and says to me that that girl is Jade from “Jackie Chan Adventures”. Confused, I tell him that never saw that show before, let alone heard of it. So we just leave the gymnasium without another word, leaving Jade to continue her kung fu. Soon, we’re back in the computer lab and I see a boy at one of the computers, and Grant tells me that that boy is Cheek from “Mixmaster King of Cards”. I tell Grant that I haven’t heard of that show either, and he’s a little surprised, but he just complies. But as we exit the computer lab, I accidentally bump into Mina. Mina apologizes for that and I apologize in return, but then Mina sees my necklace, and it has her sailor guardian symbol. She asks me if that means that I’m a fan of her. I blush and can’t find the right words to say, so I run off in confliction. Mina is confused about why I ran away, but she asks Hunter who it was, and he tells her about my name. Back to me, I’m in an empty classroom, taking a breath after running. Just then, Mirabelle and Sally show up, and they see me in a chair. They ask me what I’m doing here, and i notice them. I am happy to see them again, but I tell them that I accidentally bumped into Mina and she saw my necklace with her sailor guardian symbol on it, and she asked me if that meant that I was a fan of her, I was way too nervous to answer and I ran, hence why I’m here. Sally says that she and Mirabelle understand and that they wanna help. I tell them that I’d greatly appreciate it. Sally helps me up using her ponytails, and I say thanks as I blush from the soft feeling of her ponytails. Once my feet touch the floor, I come out of the room with Mirabelle and Sally coming along with me. A bit soon, Hunter, Ellie, Mina and Carly show up, having just found me. Seeing Carly again, I get nervous and hide behind Sally and Mirabelle, but Carly tells me that she means me no harm and she apologizes for accidentally scaring me earlier. I accept her apology, and I then notice Mina, and Mirabelle encourages me to say sorry for running away. Feeling motivated by the water cowgirl genie, I approach Mina and apologize for running away from her, and I explain that I was way to nervous to answer her question. Just then, Sally wraps me in her ponytails from shoulders to heels. Sally says that’ll relax my mind, and I thank her. Feeling relaxed in Sally’s ponytails, I tell Mina that I’m her biggest fan and I really really adore her as she’s my top sailor guardian. Mina is sweetened by what I said, and after Sally releases me from her ponytails, Mina gives me a good friendship hug. And looking at my necklace again, she sees her sailor guardian symbol, and she knows that means that she is indeed my favorite sailor guardian. However, out of nowhere, the ghost genie; Acerola says hello. Seeing that she’s a ghost type, I immediately get scared and zip into and hide in a nearby locker. Acerola quickly apologizes, saying that she didn’t mean to scare me, and Hunter explains to her that I’m as easily frightened as Shaggy and Scooby. After hearing that, Acerola says that she only wanted to say hi to the newcomer. Mina opens the locker door, and I say thanks to Mina and I say hello to Acerola, especially when one of Sally’s ponytails rubs my cheek, making me blush. With the knowledge that I’m Mina’s biggest fan and that she’s my top sailor guardian, Ellie suggests that we should go see Great Hadji. I’ve yet to meet him so I agree with Ellie. So with that, we all head to where Great Hadji is.

(end of script part four)