#Also. there's absolutely zero line safety on that stupid boat.

[neverendingford]

.

[bunnimew]

Starstruck 2: Lost at Sea

Fandom: Rise of the Guardians Relationship: Jack Frost/Pitch Black Also featuring: Jamie Bennett Tags: Mermaid AU, Modern Mer AU istg, jamie is a good bro, Pitch is The Most Dramatic, There is angst here, there is also fluff, Action Plot! Rating: T Words: 3601 Summary: Sequel to Starstruck Pitch is missing. Jack has to find him. Jamie has to follow Jack, just to make sure he doesn't get eaten by sharks or something.

For RotG Mermay 2021 prompt Mother of Pearl On AO3 Here.

Jack was beside himself with worry.

No one had seen Pitch since yesterday morning. Since Jack said goodbye to him before heading off to work.

Pitch never made it to the theater. No one had seen him at rehearsal the entire day. Jack only found out when he arrived home to an empty house and his agent knocking on the door to ask if Pitch was feeling alright.

Pitch was gone.

And Jack couldn't rest until he found him.

He went straight to Jamie. No one understood how much Jack needed Pitch more than Jamie. Jack talked about Pitch all the time, confided everything to his best friend, which meant Jamie had unique insight into just how broken Jack would be if Pitch never came back. Worse, if Jack didn't even try to find him and it turned out he could have.

Jack didn't know exactly how Jamie was going to help, but he maybe should have predicted that Jamie would grab his pick-shovel and demand to come along.

They were already on their way back to Jack and Pitch's house, their plan set to trace Pitch's path to the theater and start their search there, When Jack decided to try one more time...

"You don't have to come with me, you know."

"You can't stop me, you know."

"I know!" Jack said. His voice was a little high, a little defensive, and very tense. It wasn't Jamie's fault, but Jamie got to hear it anyway. "I'm just making sure. Pitch isn't your fiancé. You're my friend, but… I don't even know what I'm doing, so. I'm just making sure you know you don't have to do this."

Jamie pressed a hand to Jack's shoulder as they swam along, their pale and true blue tails oscillating in an oddly perfect tandem. There was strength in that hold that Jack was sorely missing right now. "And I'm making sure you don't do something stupid, or that at least you don't do it alone."

Jack almost stopped dead in the water, but Jamie’s firm hand kept him moving forward. “It might be better if I did it alone.”

Jamie snorted, the brat. He didn’t even look at Jack when he replied. “Yeah, no. No way. Even if I’m just a witness to what happens to your remains, it’s better if I’m there.”

Jack blinked, taken aback. So much for optimism and solidarity. “You’re just gonna watch me die?”

Jamie shrugged. “Depends on how it happens. I’ll take on a shark for you. I won’t take on twenty sharks for you.” Jamie paused. “Probably.”

It was a bad joke, but it brought the smile back to Jack’s face. He put his hand on Jamie’s shoulder in kind and made his peace with the fact that Jamie was going to waste however much time he wanted on having Jack’s back while Jack went out of his mind searching for Pitch.

And honestly, Jack was thankful.

“I’m going to stop in and change,” Jack said when they reached his door. “I should probably be wearing real clothes when I meet my doom.” That was going to be their running joke now, Jack decided. The thing that kept the tone from getting too heavy to handle. The thing that kept Jack focused on finding Pitch and not focused on the fact that he was lost. “Do you want a jacket or something?”

Jamie started to shake his head, then rethought it. “Actually yeah. Another layer wouldn’t be a bad idea.” He swam over to hold the door when Jack went through. “Got anything fashionable? Something that will make me look badass for our rescue adventure?”

Jack almost laughed. Jamie was an amazing friend. “I’m wearing the badass jacket. You can wear the sexy one.”

“You mean they’re not the same jacket?”

Jamie was right to grab his pick-shovel. It was a tool as much as a weapon, and Jack did also have one, but the only time they needed both was for prying huge chunks of rock out of the ground. The likelihood that Pitch was pinned under something large enough it would take both of them to free him…

Was not zero.

Jack grabbed his pick-shovel.

He also grabbed a bag to put snacks in and the knife North had given him. It was so beautiful and fancy that Jack had never used it before. But it was a knife meant for work, and Jack didn’t know what he might need to cut. So he was bringing it along just in case.

And, also just in case, Jack left his lovely seastar in its feeding tank for safety.

Jamie noticed all of it. “How long do you think we’ll be gone?”

Jack shook his head on his way out the door. “I don’t know. Maybe we’ll be able to come back in between. Maybe we’ll see something and… not be able to come back. I don’t know. But I’m bringing food enough for at least one night.”

“Seems smart,” Jamie agreed. His tone wasn’t in total agreement with his words. Jamie hesitated for the first time since hearing the news, on the idea that they would be at this for long enough that food would be a concern.

“You don’t—”

“Shut up and lead the way,” Jamie interrupted.

Well.

Okay.

Jack turned toward the theater and flicked his tail hard. Jamie would keep up. They had no time to waste.

-o-

“This is the longest I’ve ever swam in one day, I swear.”

Jack agreed. They were following a current that ran… somewhat close to Pitch’s path to the theater. It would have been kind of ridiculous for Pitch to have gotten caught up in it, but with his huge fins and unwieldy tail and, let’s be honest, ridiculous manner, it seemed the most likely thing to have happened.

That, and Jack didn’t have the authority to investigate other mers or search their homes, so it’s not like he could search anything but the natural surrounding area for Pitch.

Jack sighed. He felt defeated. “We can take another break soon. How far do you think he went?”

Jamie slowed and rotated upright in the water. “He could still be trapped in it, Jack. There’s no way to know.” But then he smiled and met Jack’s eyes with honest enthusiasm. “Glad you brought those snacks!”

Jamie was the best friend.

Jack laughed and pulled one out for him. “I really hope my idiot of a fiance is not still tumbling tail over fin in this current. That would be horribly embarrassing and also very inconvenient.”

Jamie nodded. “And very Pitch.”

Jack sighed again, this time put upon. It was true.

Hopefully one day this whole fiasco would be a great story to tell over the dinner table to Pitch’s latest celebrity friends and not the end of his world as he knew it. The cold hand of dread began its now very familiar clutch around Jack’s heart and he struggled to swallow down the rising anxiety and keep his tail moving.

Until Jamie wrapped his arm around Jack’s shoulders, again, and shook him just a little bit. “Don’t worry until we have reason to worry, Jack,” he said. “Let’s find him and figure it out from there.”

Jack agreed, because what else was he supposed to do? Except the nagging thought stuck with him that the hours Pitch had been missing already and the hours Jack and Jamie had spent looking for him were amounting to something to worry about.

So of course when they noticed the sudden plethora of fishing nets, Jack’s worry set sail for the stars and skyrocketed.

“Shark-eye on a woodlouse,” Jack moaned with his face buried in both hands. “They ate him!”

Jamie rolled his eyes and shook Jack by his elbow. “Don’t be dramatic. Pitch has been rubbing off on you.”

Jack shook his head, but kept on. “You know how these things are. Anything and everything gets caught in them and all of it dies. It doesn’t really matter if they ate him, although I’m really hoping they didn’t eat him. If he got caught in one of these nets, he’s gone.”

Jamie didn’t reply. He swam forward with a steady beat of his tail, and that told Jack everything. Jamie was an optimist, but he didn’t want to lie.

These nets meant real danger.

Made more and more evident as they continued to follow the current and found thousands of fish caught up in them. Jack and Jamie had to swim out of the way of sweeping nets more than once and each time, Jack thought of their agility and of Pitch’s huge, billowing tail. This was what got him, Jack was more and more sure. It had to be.

Jack closed his eyes as they swam on, letting Jamie guide their way. If Pitch did get swept up onto a fishing boat, how would Jack ever know for sure? He would just be gone, and Jamie wouldn’t let him mourn if there was still hope left because that’s the kind of person Jamie was. But Jack couldn’t just hope forever and live in that house without Pitch and pretend it would all be fixed when Pitch magically showed up some day.

Jack would hope, though. Because how could he give up when he loved Pitch so much? The whole idea made Jack fear his own future, so he just… swam. And let Jamie guide them. He needed to be in his own head for a little while.

“Spawn of a…” Jamie trailed off in a faraway, disbelieving tone, and Jack opened his eyes because that was either good or very, very bad. “Is that him?”

In an instant, Jack was scanning the seas around them. Fuck, but all he saw was nets. “Where?”

“There!” Jamie pointed, but he also started swimming. Jack hurried to keep up, and then—

He saw what Jamie saw. A small, long, black and gray thing tangled in an abandoned net caught in the current’s flow. It was anchored from below, but the line was too long and Jack’s concern was too short to give it more than the glance it took to verify Pitch wasn’t about to be swept away in the current again, this time without any hope of swimming his way out of it.

The figure wasn’t struggling against the nets at all and Jack swam faster. His huge fins, twisted and folded in the spun plastic, gave him away before anything else. It was Pitch. It was absolutely Pitch.

Jack screamed his name over and over as he swam nearer, waiting, hoping, praying for Pitch to look up at the sound. He looked so pathetic and sad, immobilized and swaying helplessly in the wake of the current. He could have been dead already, except that he finally stirred from all the noise Jack was making and looked up. When their eyes met, when Jack could see for himself that Pitch’s gaze was clear and focused and that he was just stuck, the ridiculous man, relief flooded through every part of Jack’s being so suddenly and so completely that he almost lost the rhythm of his stroke and stumbled in the water.

Pitch was alive, and, other than his current circumstances, he was fine.

Jack realized Pitch was neither trapped under nor between anything heavy and so his pick-shovel would do nothing but fill his hands. He tossed it behind him for Jamie to catch and continued on unhindered.

“Jack!” Pitch shouted to him, and the sound made Jack’s heart sing. The heavy pull of the current sent it sinking again, but Jack was on a mission and skillfully rode the tide right into his chest, where he clung with all of the accumulated desperation of the last several hours and steadfastly refused to let go.

Jack pulled the fancy knife from his hip and prayed the inset mother of pearl handle survived what he was about to do to it. He pulled the netting as far from Pitch’s skin as he could, then pressed the knife into the synthetic fibers and began to saw away at it with everything he was worth.

Pitch tried to help. His wiggling wasn’t very effective, but it did get him a little further from Jack’s blade, and that was something. “How did you find me?”

Jack smiled at him. It wasn’t really anything to smile about, but Jack was just so glad that he could smile at Pitch, so he did. “Followed your tracks. Made some good guesses. Jamie helped a lot.”

Pitch looked behind Jack at where Jamie must have been hovering with the two pick-shovels out of the current’s reach. “I thought he couldn’t stand me.”

“He can’t stand me when I talk about you. That’s different.”

“Oh right,” Pitch said absently. It was obvious he wasn’t really taking anything in. His eyes were glued to Jack’s hands slowly tearing away at the nets now, and he was biting anxiously at his lip.

“Don’t worry,” Jack soothed. His voice was tense, but Jack couldn’t help that. His hands couldn’t stop moving until Pitch was free, and the netting was stronger than it looked. “I’ll get you out of this, Tigershark. I promise.”

Pitch met his eyes again, and there was so much heat there. So much love and trust that Jack nearly forgot what his hands were doing. “I know.”

It felt like forever before the first rope gave way, then two forevers for the second. Jack’s arms were burning and Pitch’s tail wasn’t even free, yet. The pace was excruciating, and after hours of constant swimming, Jack was tired.

The thought of Pitch’s safety was all he needed to keep on.

Pitch, on his part, tried to help with every limb he could wiggle out of the way. The net had tangled around him at least three times, but Jack hoped once the tail was free, the rest would come easy. When the bottom fin finally broke through, Jack wondered if he imagined the way Pitch’s soft tail brushed against him, as if it were on purpose.

But then, as soon as Pitch’s first arm escaped the plastic cage, he pressed his fingers to Jack’s cheek, and Jack knew he hadn’t imagined anything at all.

Before the last snarl was cut, Jack made sure both of them had a firm grip on the net. It would absolutely suck to go through all of that just to lose Pitch to the current again. And then they had another problem.

Jack took hold of Pitch’s arm. “You trust me, right?” he asked.

Pitch looked very much like he did not trust Jack right now. “What do you mean? What are you doing?”

Jack sighed. Why did he have to ask questions? “I’m going to get you out of the current so we don’t start all of this over again. Do you trust me?”

Pitch’s eyes widened. He looked thoroughly unconvinced. “What about you?”

“I’m a stronger swimmer,” Jack said. Then he tightened his grip on Pitch’s arm and swung him around in the water. Pitch flailed hilariously, but let him do it and that was all Jack asked for. When he let go, the force and the pull of the current tore Jack away and spun him viscously, but the net kept him anchored just as it had done to Pitch before.

When he finally got another glimpse of Pitch, it was to see Jamie holding him back by the shoulders. The idiot had honestly turned around and tried to get back to him.

Thank the universe for Jamie.

Jack held the knife between his teeth and gripped the net with both hands. All he had to do was make it far enough out that the pull wasn’t stronger than him. That… should be easy, right?

Right.

Jack took a hard breath through his nose, then went for it. He swung on the net as far as physics would allow, then pushed hard with his tail and both arms to escape the drag of water trying to keep him in. He could feel the water he pushed against with his hands, but he could also feel the water slipping backwards over his shoulders and sides as the current slowly won.

Jack pushed harder, swam faster, felt himself beginning to thrash as he realized it wasn’t working. The current was going to take him and throw him out who knows where else? He had some food, but Jamie and Pitch didn’t and what if the current never let him go at all?

Then a hand grabbed his and Jack looked up to see Jamie, strained and panicked, reaching out for him into the turbulent water. Jack’s expression probably looked much the same, but some of the anxiety smoothed out when the two of them began to move, this time steadily away from the current that wanted to claim him.

Jack didn’t understand, but he didn’t care. He clung to Jamie’s wrists and didn’t look away until finally the pull began to loosen its grip and Jack could breathe again. Then he noticed the massive black tail swishing back and forth in the water behind Jamie. Pitch?

Jack blinked, startled, and accepted it without fuss when Jamie suddenly shot backward and Jack was flung bodily into a circle of four arms and two tails that seemed ready to crush him before they would let go.

It was Pitch. Pitch had pulled them out. Pitch had been tugging on Jamie’s tail and Jack was really going to have to treat Jamie to something nice because that probably hurt like hell but first, Jack was going to have to kiss Pitch senseless for saving him. Nevermind that Jack had saved Pitch first. Pitch could kiss Jack senseless, too. It was only fair.

Jack wormed one arm around each of them and held on. They were safe. They were finally safe, all three of them, and now they just had to get home. Jack’s eyes were burning and when he looked up, Jamie and Pitch’s were red-rimmed, too.

Yeah, okay. That was scary. Jack could admit that whole thing had been scary. He would do it again in a heartbeat, but… He was glad he wouldn’t have to.

Jamie finally loosened his hold and gave Jack some water. Jack, who immediately turned and smothered himself in Pitch’s chest because it had been more than twenty-four hours since Jack last laid eyes on him and the idiot had nearly gotten himself killed by accidentally getting swept up in a current that he had no business being that close to in the first place.

Pitch pressed his face into Jack’s hair and wrapped around him the way Jack liked, the way that made Jack feel safe. It was stupid, because obviously Pitch was a danger magnet, but the man had also proven himself to be strong and capable not two minutes ago, so Jack would take it.

“I love you so much,” Jack whispered into the water. “Don’t ever do that again.”

“I won’t, Jewelfish.” Pitch said against the shell of Jack’s ear. “Never again.”

Jack pressed his face up against Pitch’s throat. “I’m serious, Pitch. I was so worried. I thought I lost you. I thought I was going to have to—”

Pitch pressed two fingers against Jack’s lips to quiet him, then leaned just far enough away to meet his eyes. “I swear, Jack. I will be more careful. I will never do this again.”

Jack stared deep into Pitch’s gaze, judging for himself whether Pitch really meant that or not. Pitch held Jack’s stare, steady and calm. Calm, after all of that. How? But he was. Calm and sure, and Jack slowly started to believe him.

With a nip at Pitch’s fingers, Jack gave in. “Alright, Cuddlefish. Take me home.”

Pitch smiled and swam pointedly away from the current that started all of this. “Anything you wish, Nibblefish. Thank you for coming to find me.”

Suddenly Jamie was on Jack’s other side again, and his solid warmth was very much appreciated. “There was no way we wouldn’t. Seriously,” Jamie said, wide eyes fixed on Pitch. “I don’t think you really know. There was no other option. Jack was coming to find you. I only came to make sure Jack didn’t die in the process and, as it turns out, good thing I did!”

Pitch’s smile, adoring when it was aimed at Jack, shifted into a sort of baffled amusement. Jamie had that effect on people. “Thank you. Jack is very lucky to have a friend like you.”

“Yeah,” Jack agreed. He wrapped his arm around Jamie and squeezed. “I know.”

Jamie grinned and hugged him back. “Good thing. Because I am not looking forward to the hours it’s going to take to get back and watching you two be disgustingly sweet and all over each other the whole way.”

Jack bit his lip to keep from laughing.

“I’m going to see you home safe,” Jamie continued, “but as soon as we are, I am clearing out, because I know exactly what you two are going to get up to and I want no part in that.”

Pitch’s face was equal parts embarrassed and scandalized, and Jack couldn’t keep the laughter inside anymore.

Jack was incredibly lucky. He had an adoring fiancé who would give him anything, an amazing best friend who would do, for him, anything, and a future that didn’t scare him anymore.

Also, Jamie was one hundred percent right.

Jack couldn’t wait to get home.

[evangelene]

Despite What You Are (3)

Summary: Vampires don’t feed on blood, they feed on fear. So, why is yours so potent? Why were you saved by the most dangerous of all vampires–Kim Namjoon?

Based on this request:

“Can i ask for a ff where namjoon is a vampire mafia boss and has a spft spot for you. And you get into trouble woth a rival gang and he goes crazy? Fluffy and angsty 🌹”

Part One / Part Two / Part Four / Part Five

Namjoon, after releasing the information-dump monster that was stewing in his chest for so long, finally decided to open up your world beyond the four walls of your captivity. Granted, the space was still limited—if only because he wasn’t ready to bring you to the bottom floors of the compound. It made sense, because, you know, you were a human in a fucking vampire compound. Hey, there were no complaints from you; you had zero issues with keeping distance between you and the vampires who were, probably, not as kind and thoughtful as the ones you’d met recently.

A.K.A: You liked your head on your shoulders and your blood in your body thankyouverymuch.

You supposed it was also nice that Namjoon didn’t just open your door and murmur something like “go, have fun,” but with a better palette of words than your feeble brain could put together. Perhaps, he too felt that it would be akin to releasing a tamed rabbit into the wild. Instead, he decided to show you around your new expanded quarters.

However, you decided quickly that Kim Namjoon was a shitty tour guide.

You felt more like a student being walked to a restroom by a teacher mid A.C.T instead of being shown a place around a place for you to…exist in…live in?

Live? Where you really planning on living there?

For how long?

Forever?

Damn, you really needed to start thinking ahead a bit more—like more than the next hour, more than the next day. Planning wasn’t your forte, it was as if it was built into your character that you were weak-willed and destined to go along with whatever painfully kinked road life paved for you.  

“There’s a bathroom here as well.”

You nodded; raising your eyebrows like this was a new revelation. Toilet + shower + sink = bathroom. Got it.

Honestly, you felt like you were learning the alphabet for the first time.

L is for Library.

K is for Kitchen.

T is for the tortured screams of humans being fed from two floors down.

Yeah, you could hear that shit too—Namjoon promised to try and soundproof as best he could, but you told him not to worry about it, you know, like an idiot. It was almost as if you believed that this man next to you was human. It was almost as if you believed that, if you pressed your lips into a tight enough line, it would make him unable to sense your fear.

The ghastly scream of a woman dying only tightened your gut.

He looked at you over his shoulder, frozen with a quickly paling face and an expression that screamed ‘are you serious?’

You only mimicked his expression, raising one eyebrow but never loosening the purse to your lips. “What?” You tried to make it sound like nothing was wrong, but you were shifty and refused to meet him eye to eye.

It also didn’t help that the man you were trying to hide your fear from was the one species that could sense it better than any other.

“Y/N.”

“Mm?” You stared at the wall, admiring the shitty picture that all office buildings seemed to have. You know, that one same scene of a cabin in the woods with a nice little creek and a boat with no person in it.  Was this warehouse/compound/vampire-lair an office complex before? Or did Namjoon choose this painting of all paintings to stare at every fucking day?

“Why?”

“Why what?” You squeaked out, nearly jumping out of your skin at the howl of a man in pain.

“Y/N.” It was a command, one forced out through his nausea—and, consequently, one that only increased your fear.

Wiping your sweating palms on your jeans (new jeans that were apparently brought in by Yoongi, if only because he said his mate was the same size as you and she wouldn’t notice if some of her mountainous clothing went missing), you swallowed. “Well, um...like…you know? I’m human and they’re human and…like…that could be me.”

“That will never be you.” He growled—the safety of which would have been attractive were it not predator to your prey.

“B-but it could be.”

“Why is this bothering you now?”

You stared at him, blankly, like he was stupider than you were. “Well, when I was in that room I couldn’t hear a man scream for help. That room’s pretty damn sound-proof you know, which is even more scary to think about now so can we like talk about something else before you throw up and I pee my pants.”

He sighed, pinching the bridge of his nose as he swallowed down whatever meal-less bile was rising in his chest.

Before you realized it, those moments of listening to real life horror movies playing out beneath your feet ended as quickly as you noticed them--your fear disappearing along with them. You had this hunch that Namjoon had made his clansmen feed elsewhere in the compound—a place out of earshot and without an echo. It fit the bill of his character, at least the only version of himself that you’d seen. Selfishly unselfish, if that paradox made any sense.

What hadn’t changed with your newfound freedom was the fact that Kim Namjoon was adamant that you couldn’t properly take care of yourself if left to your own devices.

So, okay, yes, it might have been absolutely true, but it wasn’t like you were complaining anyways—just stating the obvious. When he entrusted you to be a normal adult and be self-sufficient, he found you curled up with a bag of goldfish crackers instead of an actual meal, cry-laughing at a romantic comedy because…reasons. You may or may not have been on your period at the time and you may or may not have been unable to find any chocolate in the vicinity.

And that was how Seokjin, a pretty damn good cook for someone who didn’t actually eat like a normal human, became your honorary babysitter.

Again, you weren’t complaining—you were fed, had more freedom than you’d ever had at the Hunter’s Association and, more often than not, were graced with company that wasn’t a jock-head moron too full of themselves to note your strengths outside of a fear-filled realm of vampires.

Since when did you stop wanting to escape?

Probably when you started crying for the sake of a vampire mate you shouldn’t care about but inexplicably did.

The only immediate downside to your predicament was the damn near constant dad jokes.

“You know, for the pasta few days it’s been really nice getting to gnocchi you.”

You let out a sigh that had been slowly building for the past half hour stuck in the same room with Kim Seokjin, forgoing face-palming if only to keep hold of the book in your hands. “Do you even know what gnocchi is?” It was mumbled more to the pages than to the man trying not to almost steam his face off with boiling water. Though a brow-less Seokjin would make good blackmail fodder for later, you wanted to avoid the danger if only because you were shit useless when it came to helping heal vampiric wounds.

“No clue.” He shrugged, hissing when he grabbed a metal pot with his bare hand like an idiot (like you would have but, you know, this isn’t about you). “I just saw the word in a human recipe book and I thought that it fit nicely with the joke.”

“Okay now I dare you to try and make a pun out of cavatappi.”

“Pass.” He waved you away as you let out a bark of laughter to the ceiling. However, the fact that you laughed at all—even if it was at him rather than with him—seemed to goad his ego. “Hah! I win!”

“I only laughed because you’re stupid.”

“Still a win, stupidity or no stupidity.”

Rolling your eyes, you turned the page over only to come face to face with an illustration more baffling than understanding atomic diagrams in school—well, the schooling that was considered ‘normal’ instead of the Hunter’s Association’s vampire-killing training. You probably (no, you know) you looked like a doofus, your lip curled in confusion as you stared at the image; you were positive you would be able to grow wings on your forehead sooner than you would be able to make sense of the gibberish information spread out before you.

“And I thought human anatomy was difficult.” You frowned at the book. “What the hell is a vesticular astral plane manifestor? And why are there like seven of them? Gah! Does anything about vampires make sense?”

“We’re not any more complicated to understand than you, Miss I-have-203-bones.”

“Its 206.”

“Well you don’t know what a manifestor is.”

“Because humans are normal!”

He scoffed, though his lips were turned up in a smirk. “Yeah, sure ‘Normal’.”

Part of you really wanted to throw the 1800’s equivalent of “vampires for dummies” that you were straining your feeble brain over at him; but, the smarter part of you said that you were hungry and you weren’t willing to risk angering him.

However, you doubted that Kim Seokjin ever actually got angry—he was surprisingly levelheaded for someone who tripped over his own foot every two seconds.

Of course, you were one to talk.

“So like—is this a diagram of a mated vampire then? Or like?” You twisted the book sideways, as if seeing it from the different angle would make it easier to understand. All it did was make the legend harder to read.

“There’s no difference in the anatomy of a mated and an unmated vampire, Y/N.”

“Liar.” You furrowed your brow in concentration. “There’s got to be something to explain cranky-pants.”

“It’s called having a human mate.”

“Bullshit!”

“Do you ever refrain from swearing?”

“Rarely.”

He sighed, shoulders dropping at your proud grunt of victory. “Namjoon is just worried about you, that is all.”

“Hmph. Yeah right, then why does he always make Taehyung and Hoseok go do his random shit just to make sure I’m alone. I swear, if he could make you go away too, he would. What is the point of keeping me if I’m to have no contact with anyone outside of himself? Which is another thing--” You sensed yourself trailing off into a tangent, and, instead of finishing it, you let your voice wander off with your thoughts as you squinted at the tiny print of the legend.

Seokjin laughed, stirring the pot with one hand as he reached up in the cupboard for a strainer. “Yes, probably. Though, it doesn’t help that you are rebellious for someone who got scared of me opening a box of noodles.”

“I was focused!”

“Sure you were.”

Dropping your head to curtain your face with your hair, you let the redness of your cheeks heat and cool down outside of Seokjin’s gaze. “Shut up. I don’t get him.”

You could feel Seokjin’s eyes on you as he turned away from your dinner. “But you’re trying to, right?”

“I--” More redness, more shriveling up within yourself to hide the fact that you were now more tomato than human. “It’s only fair, right?”

Seokjin cocked his head. “Cute.”

You flipped him off.

“Why are you showing me your finger? Is there something wrong with it?”

You sighed, shoulders caving in defeat. “I’m hungry.”

With a roll of his eyes, the elder turned back to the pot to strain the pasta into the sink. “You know his crankiness is just how he shows affection—vampires aren’t known for outwardly caring.”

“Well it’s confusing.” You mumbled to the book, flipping the page if only because you felt a migraine building in your temple from staring at the jumbled image for so long.

“What’s confusing?”

You nearly jumped out of your skin at the sound of Namjoon’s voice, turning to see him leaning against the doorway, face screwed in disgust. Clutching the fabric at your chest, you relaxed enough to let out a sigh that somewhat calmed the erratic heartbeat slamming into your fingertips. “You deserve every bit of that.” You glared at him.

Swallowing the nausea, he raised an eyebrow at you with the smallest of smirks. “I suppose I do—however, it would be much appreciated if you learned to be less afraid of everything that comes your way; specifically, of the harmless factors in your life.”

Halfway through his speech, you turned back to the book splayed out on the table with a grunt that neither confirmed nor denied his statement.

Silence blanketed the room for only a few seconds, and then you sensed the agitation from the man in the doorway mere moments before his voice echoed across the room. “So you’re just going to ignore my question?” He lifted his gaze up from you to Seokjin who was currently too busy dumping pasta back into the pot via strainer.

Seokjin only shrugged.

Your attention was focused on the text rather than the clan leader, purposefully avoiding him for the sake of your own pride.

“Y/N.”

“Mm.”

He sighed, on the verge of banging his head against the wall just to get your attention. Part of you fully believed that he was attempting to direct his thoughts at you in the hopes that maybe—just maybe—you would be able to hear them; but, alas, you were human.

And even if you weren’t, you were denser than clay.

He licked his lips. “What is confusing?”

Ah, so it was like that.

He was a man that didn’t like to be left out of the loop—which was probably one of the traits that made him so crazy successful at being a clan leader. You were at least thankful that he was much more polite than people you’d met in the past who held a similar character trait. It might have been unwanted wishful thinking, but you wanted to believe that this unashamed desire to know what was going on was a trait mostly reserved for you and you alone.

The majority of you wanted to ignore the fact that you were becoming that much more intuitive to him.

“You are.”

He visibly relaxed when you finally answered, though the actual response seemed more troubling than your grumpy silence. “How so?”

You pursed your lips at the book, unable to formulate the answer in a way that would pass your lips aloud without your face turning the color of the pasta sauce Seokjin was grabbing.

Your affection is strange and confusing. I don’t get it. I just don’t understand why… You paused, head snapping up. Hey wait—doesn’t pasta sauce normally…

“Seokjin!” You nearly screeched, chair slamming to the ground behind you as you dove over the table with enough force to nearly flip it completely. Heart pounding against your sternum with adrenaline, you clasped his hand tight on top of the lid he was about two seconds away from unscrewing from the jar, nails digging in tight enough to bruise but not to cut—you were a nail biter, so there wasn’t much there to actually cut with.  “Don’t!” Was the only thing that you could manage to say past the blood rushing in your ears.

Heaving in air like you were freshly drowned, you stared at Seokjin as if he was the biggest idiot on the planet. Out of your peripherals, you could see Namjoon torn between puking and being frozen in a pose that suggested that the building was about to burst down in a hail of bullets.

It was strangely comforting that his first reaction was for him to come towards you rather than out the door, despite the fact that your fear made him sick as hell.

“What?” Seokjin stared back at you, wide-eyed and with concern knitting his brow.

You removed one of your hands from the lid, slapping his away with it in order to take the jar from his grasp. Spinning it towards you, you squinted at the ingredients label.

“There’s garlic in this you moron.”

“What?”

With a shaky sigh, you sat back on your heels and let out a laugh that was enough to relax both you and the males in the room. “Pasta sauce usually has garlic in it, idiot—did you not check it before hand?”

He shrugged. “How was I to know? I don’t eat human food—besides, I did see some sauce recipes that included garlic and some that didn’t.”

“So you didn’t think to check?” You repeated, clutching the jar to your chest like the garlic could seep through glass and hurt your babysitter and infuriating savior.

“It didn’t say so on the front so I assumed it was fine.”

You wanted to facepalm and/or throw something at the male; it was like talking to a two year old—but you supposed you had to give them the benefit of the doubt considering they didn’t know any better. They weren’t human.

It was probably the same thing when they spoke to you about the concerns of vampires.

“I…” You pursed your lips, holding onto the jar tighter in your death grip as if they might try and wrestle it from you and hurt themselves. “Just the noodles are fine.”

Seokjin cocked his head. “I’m sure we can make something that’ll taste better—I’ve read that noodles are bland on their own.”

You chuckled, feeling Namjoon’s eyes on the side of your face as you shook your head. “Its fine, Jin, I’m just thankful for the food as it is.” Climbing down off the table, you spun the jar around in your grasp as you analyzed the kitchen, deciding what to do with it. Because you were dumb and because you had no willpower to figure it out after that heart attack, you stepped towards the farthest cupboard to tuck the jar back up and away—out of sight out of mind, for now.

“But—“

“It’s fine, really.” You grinned at the elder man before turning to finally face Namjoon. You hated how his stare made your heart do strange gymnastics in your chest despite you doing everything in your power to stop it. “What?”

He raised an eyebrow at you, his head cocked to the side. “Nothing.”

There’s obviously something.

He only hummed in response and you didn’t have a spine strong enough to pursue it further.

~.~

Now that the world was open to you—well, now that you could exist in more than one room and one room only—you liked to sit next to the window when you read. Though, it was really only as close as you could manage to get to said window. Namjoon, being a clan leader, had gone through extensive preparations in order to ensure your safety.

Even if it felt more like baby locks on a cabinet door versus protection for yourself.

There were bars on the windows to stop things from getting in—or out, but you know, he glossed over that part—and on top of that, there was shit blocking the windows and a nice, strict line taped directly to the floor to indicate where you weren’t supposed to stand. The furniture blocking the immediate access to the window was even bolted to the damn floor; so, unless you were a spider monkey (you tried, you were not much of one), you couldn’t directly disobey.

Sitting on top of the tape—more on the side you shouldn’t be on than the side you should be on—you thought that it was kind of cute how worried he was about you. Also kind of borderline new parent in a game of “why is my child trying to kill itself?” but you know, cute nonetheless.

“Y/N, what if someone has a gun? That glass isn’t bulletproof!”

You stared at him like he was the most idiotic person you’d ever met—and damnit you had to meet yourself every single day of your life. “What vampire uses a gun?”

“Y/N!”

You had the same book in your hands—a book that you were beginning to look at with fondness now, maybe because it took so damn long for you to make sense of any of; or, maybe, it was because it made you that much closer to understanding Namjoon a tiny bit better.

Why you wanted to was a forced secret between you and your subconscious.

Flipping past the anatomy section, you moved onto the middle bit—the one you only opened when you knew you were absolutely alone. To be caught red-handed reading about vampiric mates would be embarrassing, especially when you’ve spent so long in denial.

Vampires are not creatures whose relationships strive off of physical affection. While monogamous, they focus on their intellectual connection and reserve touches for necessary occasions or for procreation.

You flipped to another page, enjoying the sunlight warming your face. It was nice to see something other than brick, drywall and the same four vampires.

Mates are the source of life for each other. While a mate’s fear is nauseating, there is power in having a mate by one’s side. This source of energy far outweighs any benefit gained by feeding from a human’s fear via death; one’s abilities are near limitless in presence or defense or their mate.

You pursed your lips as if you could actually comprehend that—it didn’t add up enough with your current experiences to make any sense. All you’ve noticed is that you have only ever been a hindrance to Namjoon. Annoying, loud, injured and afraid of everything that comes your way—none of those equaled power of any sort.

Despite the disagreement, you devoured the words page after page, the expanses of unread passing and decreasing in the blink of an eye. The book captured your attention to the point that the world dropped around you, transporting you somewhere far away from the compound—from the sun and the ground.

To touch a vampire is a rare occasion; one that should be cherished fully, for it is foreign. Be thankful, even if touched as nothing more than a meal. To any human who may have stumbled across this book written by vampires about vampires, it is a pity that your level of comprehension is lacking and therefore you cannot understand just how complex the workings of vampire communication are.

I pray that this book leaves your hands before you are made a meal of.

And, to any vampires who have found this, may this book bring you a greater understanding of self and may our future be prosperous—may our kind be pulled out of the shadows to rise once more.

“Okay, dude, you had such a good thing going and then you just had to shit on us humans, didn’t ya?”

You grumbled to the pages, still too lost to notice that you weren’t alone in the room. Still too lost to notice that Seokjin’s piercing gaze from the doorway was catching you in a place where you were obviously not supposed to be and reading a book you obviously weren’t supposed to be interested in.

Okay, the latter was only obvious to your ass backwards human emotions that said “FUCKING RUN DON’T LET HIM KNOW” anytime you showed interest in another human being…well...in this case…being.

“Is there something you wish to know about mates, Y/N?”

You nearly jumped out of your skin, the fear screeching up your spine and out of your body in a flash so quick that not even Seokjin had time to digest it; at least your recoveries were getting quicker.

“I appreciate the morsel, but you are off limits to feed from.”

You threw your finished book at him, the old leather creating an arc of dust that left a trail of sparkling particles lit up by the beam of sunlight. “If y’all would wear heels or something so I could at least hear you coming it would be great.”

He only laughed and, for a moment, you expected there to be fangs despite being well aware that the stereotype was incredibly false.

“Asshole.” You muttered, your calming heart allowing you to lean back so the weight of your body rested on the heel of your palms. “What do you want?”

“Well I came in pursuit of inquiring about supper, but now I’m more curious as to why you are investigating mates.”

Your head dipped to your chest, the rising heat of your skin causing you to want to put a barrier between you and Seokjin’s gaze.

“That’s a nervous tic of yours, you know that? You always try and hide your embarrassment.”

“No shit Sherlock, you think I’m unaware of this?” You curled your lip at your dusty, jean-clad knees. “You know, you don’t have to point out the obvious just because you notice it.”

“Who the hell is Sherlock?”

You groaned, rolling your eyes. “For fuck’s sake.”

“You swear quite a lot too, humans are honestly so vulgar.”

You really wanted nothing more than to flip off the vampire, but you knew that he wouldn’t understand the offense to the gesture and so you curled your hands into fists if only because, if you were going to go through the effort, you wanted him to feel your spite.

“What is on your mind, Y/N?”

You winced. Why did you wear everything on your face? You wondered if Namjoon was able to read you just as well, or maybe Seokjin was just well versed in the language of idiot. “It says vampires hate touching.”

There was silence for a moment while Seokjin gathered his words, as if sensing this was a sensitive subject for you. Why was it so sensitive? You didn’t know? Did you really want to hold Namjoon’s hand? Cuddle with him? Take long walks on the beach hand in hand?

Brain don’t you dare answer that, don’t betray me now.

Yes. Yes you did.

Fuck you.

The inner war had you making yet another face at your knees.

“Well, yes, we’re not fond of it. To us, it doesn’t really make much sense.”

You grunted, screwing your eyes shut to the memory of his hands on your face, brushing away your tears as you nearly hyperventilated in his chair. “Interesting.”

“What is?”

“Nothing.” You shook your head, ridding yourself of the memory with a shrug as you swiveled yourself to properly face him. “Actually, it’s nice timing that you found me. I have a proposition for you.”

He settled into his hips, one eyebrow raised. “Mm? But is this a proposition I’ll be interested in?”

You laughed, eyes sparkling with a dangerous fire. “Probably not, but I can be pretty persuasive.”

“Well, I shall be the judge of that.”

You smiled, tilting your chin. “How confident are you in human medicine, Jinnie?”

“Why do I not like the pet name? It sounds like you want something that I don’t want to give you and that is scarier than any vampire out there.”

“Answer the question.”

He frowned at you. “Why?”

You refused to pull your stare from his, nails digging into the wooden floor. “I want you to take out whatever bullshit you found in me. I want you to put me under—if you can, if you can’t do it while I’m awake—and open my chest and rip out that fucker. Preferably, I would like you to close me back up and make me better afterwards.”

His eyes widened with each sentence, growing even wider at the lack of a joke in your expression and the utter seriousness to the wicked glint in your stare.

“Y/N…Namjoon—Namjoon’ll—“

“He doesn’t own me.” You cut him off, shoulders relaxing as the elephant in the room finally reared its head and left. “This is what I want. This is what I need you to do for me.”

“Y/N—I don’t know…I don’t know if I’m able to do that without killing you. I’m not a surgeon, not a healer—nevertheless for a human. I’d have to read up on it and even then…”

“Then read. Figure it out. I don’t care what happens, if I’m—“ a spike of fear that you swallowed, it undoubtedly didn’t go unnoticed by Seokjin. “—if I’m going to be irreparable, if I’m going to be damaged or maimed afterwards, that’s fine. I would like to be alive—and unharmed—but if that doesn’t happen, it’s…” You screwed your eyes shut, remembering those warm gold eyes. “It’s what it is. I’m not going to watch him get hurt because of me.”

“You’re doing this for Namjoon?”

“I’m doing this for me, Jin. I’m doing this for me.”

“What happens when you die? What happens to me when Namjoon finds out what we did?”

You pursed your lips, raising one challenging eyebrow. “You won’t let me die that easily.”

He sighed, licking his lips as he stared at the wall, the bookshelves, the window—anything that wasn’t staring directly back at him and would allow him a moment’s contemplation. “Y/N, do you honestly trust me that much that you are willing to put your life in my hands? I am a vampire, I have control over my urges but…I—“

“I trust you.” You said with the utmost certainty. “If there’s anyone in this whole compound I trust, it would be you.”

He nodded, more to himself than to you, and finally, finally, lifted his gaze back to yours. There was a softness in his eyes that hadn’t been there before.

“I told you,” you chuckled, “I’m pretty convincing.”

Laughing on a mini-eyeroll, he crossed his arms over his chest. “I haven’t made my mind up about that. However, I believe that I will agree to your proposal—on my terms. Firstly, it will take preparation. I need to read more and gather the necessary materials without Namjoon’s knowledge; secondly, I presume you don’t want him to be aware of this proposition?”

You cocked your head. “How likely do you think this would actually happen if Namjoon were to know?”

“Alright then.” He nodded. “I will also need time to find a space to do this in, and you will need to craft a proper time to allow this—a time when Namjoon is not around. I will leave that one to you as you are more aware of his movements than I am.”

“So, it’s a deal?”

He grinned. “We have a deal.”

~.~

There were a lot of things that you didn’t expect to happen when you found out you were captured by a vampire. You didn’t expect kindness, you didn’t expect someone to claim to be your mate and then not love you at the end of it. You didn’t expect to be healed and then treated like a precious pet. You didn’t expect to find friends and understanding in creatures that had only shown you pain and agony.

And honestly, the last thing you expected out of everything was to find the biggest, baddest clan leader of the entire continent huddled up under a blanket like an absolute child, his eyes glued to a television set positively blaring a really shitty romance movie.

Okay, maybe it was supposedly a good romance movie—but you cringed easily and thus you preferred romantic comedies because laughter eased awkward situations.

That wasn’t the point anyways, the point was that the room he had holed himself in screamed anything but good—like there were ghosts in the walls of people who had died and/or been tortured to hell there. It was a room that he probably thought that you would never go in, considering you were literally afraid of everything and this room screamed doom and terror. However, fear didn’t mean that you weren’t stupid enough to explore places you shouldn’t.

And thus, the idiot in a blanket watching two humans make out in a room with bloodstains on the wall and deep-rooted marks on the floor looked up as you threw open the door, his eyes wide and glowing gold at the scent of your momentary fear.

They dulled to a brown when your fear subsided at the absolute absurdity of him.

He paused the screen as if he wasn’t caught red handed watching something that would embarrass most human men. You had never seen Namjoon embarrassed, and he didn’t appear to be so now either.

However, he didn’t look entirely comfortable in your presence.

Adorable.

The two of you stood like that for a moment, him on the floor of the torture chamber and you standing in the doorway with the hall-light illuminating your back. There were no words—hell, not even a coherent stream of thought--bouncing around inside your skull.

Just confusion, lots and lots of confusion. Especially as your eyes took in the makeshift bed, the pillows, the things that suggested that you had finally figured out where Namjoon had been sleeping all these months.

Why here?

More confusion.

“You shouldn’t be here. You should be smart enough to know that this wing brings no good—you weren’t allowed to come down here.”

Your thoughts collided into clarity with your sudden sense of defiance. “And since when have I ever listened to where I can and can’t be?”

You thought of the time he caught you leaning against the window, having climbed over his barricades just to get some sunlight. He had been so angry and you had been so terrified that it should have prevented you from doing is a second time, a third time, the thirty-first time….

Well, it didn’t.

And the lack of amusement on his face now, surprisingly, didn’t make you feel afraid—instead, it only created plenty for yourself.

“Why are you watching this?”

He frowned at the television, his gaze refusing to meet yours—you had to say, that was the closest you’d ever seen the man come to your ‘human embarrassment’.

“I wanted to understand something, and I was told that this would be the best option to try to do so.”

You cocked your head, taking a deep breath as the pieces clicked just far enough and you stepped deeper into the room towards him. You tried your best not to jump as the door shut behind you and locked you in almost darkness, but you knew you failed when your steps skipped and you nearly fell on your face.

Namjoon only watched you approach him, his eyes never leaving you as you made your way towards him and lowered your ass to the cold, hard ground next to him.

You tried not to think about the bloodstains; luckily, it was easy enough when you had Namjoon next to you.

Even easier still when the glow from the romance movie hit your face as he pressed play on the remote by his side. Seemed he was one, enjoying the movie and two, impatient when it came to getting back to it.

“What did you want to understand?” You said finally, watching the couple on the screen run into each other in the rain, their kisses passionate and utterly cringey to you who could barely even touch the person who cared about but didn’t love you.

“I wanted to understand human affection, since mine is apparently so confusing.” His voice almost made it sound like he was pouting, and, to be honest, it was kind of cute and comedic to imagine that a clan leader was pouting over something so stupid.

His hands tightened around the blanket.

“So you did this because of me? And you didn’t want me to find out?” You curled your knees to your chest, the cold of the floor seeping through the fabric of your jeans, sending a freezing hand down your spine.

He nodded.

You wanted to tell him that it was fine, that he didn’t have to do all of this for you. He didn’t have to try and understand your version of affection, he didn’t have to pretend like he loved you, he didn’t have to do anything more for you than he’d already done. However, you couldn’t get the words out because the locked emotion in your chest prevented you from letting any of the lies escape.

It would be false, it would be wrong.

If you were to be stuck with someone, if you were to have someone claim to be your mate, you wanted them to love you. You wanted to be able to love them—you wanted that contact, skin to skin and heart to heart. The past few years devoid of any sort of care, touch or conversation at the Hunter’s Association made you want all of those even more. You wanted to care about someone, and you wanted them to care about you.

For some reason, you still had enough fight in you to believe that you didn’t actually care about Kim Namjoon.

The fact that you cried over his safety was enough to prove that your head and your body were at a disconnect and you desperately wanted your brain to be the truth teller.

You knew it wasn’t.

It never was.

“Thank you.” You murmured, suppressing your shiver as you rubbed out the goosebumps on your forearms.

Both of you watched the couple on the screen, watched how they kissed, how they spoke to each other and held each other’s hands. You watched them hug, watched them huddle on a bed and speak with their parent’s about a dramatic engagement that was fated to be disliked by whatever awful future-in-laws and evil bitches were trying to break it up.

God, honestly, romance movies were so damn dramatic.

“Why aren’t you afraid?”

You cocked your head at him, pulling your gaze from the television long enough to see him staring at you from the corners of his eyes.

“This room, by previous standards, should terrify you—but you’re not afraid. Not at all.”

There was heat creeping its way up your neck, spreading across your ears. For once, you didn’t have to duck your head to hide it from him—the room was dark enough as it was. “I—It’s not scary.” You murmured, trying to force the words from your mouth instead of your head—but, you were weak and it was easier to think them then to say them.

I think it’s because you’re here.

There was a moment where you almost believed that he didn’t hear you, that suddenly whatever mate bond the two of you had didn’t allow him to detect that string of thought. However, after a long pause, after a moment of studying the couple’s next kiss, he let go of one side of his blanket.

Suddenly, there was access to his flank.

You stared at him, confused and unable to read the nonverbal cues he was giving you.

“It’s cold.” He said, like that made any sense for him to no longer have a blanket on one side of himself.

“Yea.” You wanted to spit something else sarcastic at him, but for whatever reason there was a moment there between you that you didn’t want to shit on.

At least not yet.

“Humans get cold easily, do they not?”

“And vampires don’t like to touch. Why are we stating the obvious?” You said equally as stupid as the man besides you.

Seemed he, too, had a hard of a time getting out cheesy phrases.

“Y/N.” He sighed.

You ran your tongue along your teeth, opting for the coward’s way out since it was easier and you were terrified of the way your heart constricted at the thought that this was what you thought it was.

Can I?

Without looking at you, he reached his arm around you and brought your shoulder to his, winding the blanket around the both of you.

Surprisingly, he was warm. It shouldn’t have been surprising, they still had circulatory systems—they still had a heart that beat; you blamed the fact that everything that was associated with the word vampire before 2048 screamed cold. The chill from the floor was nothing compared to the furnace that was Kim Namjoon.

You kept your hands in your lap, if only because you were positive that, if they weren’t, they would find his—and this had to be enough. It was going to be enough for you. You were going to make sure that this was enough for you.

Maybe he would never love you, maybe he would never reach over to hold your hand or kiss you—maybe he would never tell you anything about how he felt. Maybe it would never be like how your parents were; maybe it would never be like the movies. Maybe he would never understand you and maybe you would never understand him.

But this was enough.

And you were starting the long journey of being okay with that.

“Why do humans kiss? It doesn’t make any sense and it seems incredibly unsanitary for beings that fall ill so easily.”

You groaned. “Don’t ruin the moment.”

“What moment?” He frowned, turning to look at you like you were speaking gibberish. For once, it might have been helpful if he could read your thoughts like a normal mate.

With a sigh, you reached up and gingerly touched his face with two of your fingers, forcing his expression back to the television. “Just watch your movie.”

“Do you like courtship movies?”

You let out an unintentional bark of laughter. “It’s called romance, dumbass. And not particularly, I like romantic comedies but I prefer action oriented movies in general—considering I’ve got the attention span of a squirrel.”

“You’re about as brave as one too.”

You contemplated smacking him, but you were too comfortable to put in too much added effort, so you resorted to making a stupid face that had him laughing without ever even looking at you.

~.~

The bedroom that you almost died in suddenly felt too cramped and too full—considering all seven aware of your existence were piled in there like it was some party. Lucky for you, Hoseok and Taehyung seemed adamant on making it one by inviting you to play a shitty board game they found in an abandoned apartment complex. You didn’t know whether to call this bedroom yours or Namjoon’s, considering he had probably used it before your ass came running down the street with a child in your arms and a vampire on your heels. However, you’d never seen him sleep there.

You assumed he resorted himself to holing up in that awful torture chamber of a room for your peace of mind at night.

He still thought that you couldn’t be vulnerable around him.

For once, the man that was usually right was dead wrong.

You had no idea why they all suddenly decided to burst in on you and the idiot brigade’s fun time. But, with Hoseok’s knee a millimeter away from touching yours and six other vampires in the room, you thought that it was interesting just how damn different they could be when it came to contact.

Taehyung avoided touching you, though you had this inkling that he was secretly a hugger. Hoseok hated, hated contact but enjoyed being almost there at all times. And then, well then there was Yoongi. Yes, granted he had a mate, and granted he was a grumpy son-of-a-bitch most days, but he was an outlier in the mix. If you thought Namjoon was bad when it came to physical contact, Yoongi, who only ever sat in a corner avoiding everyone’s advances, was a trillion times worse.

Rolling the dice to the game, you looked up as Namjoon made up the last and final of the seven by stepping into the room. Honestly, you didn’t mean to look up to him—you didn’t mean to be drawn to him—but it was like it was natural. He had that aura that exuded ‘leader’; it was impossible for all eyes to not be on him. Everyone was drawn to him—at least, that was the excuse you gave yourself as you tried to quickly look away.

As you tried to make it seem like you weren’t swept up in how nice his clothing fit him today.

“What’s with the emergency meeting?” Seokjin wasted no time, speaking before anyone else could even utter a word. You supposed it made sense, Jin was the eldest in the room and, as a result, he was the only one with a backbone strong enough to meet the clan leader eye to eye.

Or you know, piss him off without dying.

“I’ve made my decision.”

Seokjin’s jaw locked and you couldn’t help but look like a lost dog between the two men, their glares bouncing tension thick enough to cut in the air. “On that?”

“Yes.”

You, being you, blurted stupidly. “What topic? What the hell are you talking about?” However, you only received a passing glance as Taehyung looked on with you, seemingly as confused as you were. Hoseok turned to give you a warming smile that didn’t touch his eyes as he lifted his chin to stare back up at his leader.

“Good.” Yoongi muttered from the corner. “It’s about time.”

Seokjin’s eyes darkened, receiving his answer after deciphering Namjoon’s gaze. The elder man’s hands tightened on his biceps. “I think that this is a stupid idea.”

“I didn’t even say what my answer was.” But there was no anger in Namjoon’s voice, no annoyance—just a fact.

They were that close.

Sometimes, they felt closer than you and your damn mate.

I’m not jealous.

Mmhm, sure Y/N, keep telling yourself that like it makes it true.

“But you’re going to tell them.”

Namjoon sighed, rubbing the back of his neck to smooth out whatever stress had kinked it as he peered down at you. You hated how pity warmed in the depths of his gaze, as if his words were going to break you later.

If that isn’t some fucking shitty foreshadowing for the doomed-ness of my life then I don’t know what is. Your inner thoughts grumbled before you could get a reign on them.

“Yes.” He murmured. “I’m going to tell the rest of the clan about Y/N.”

Taehyung’s stare flit between you and Namjoon, his eyes growing comically wide.

“How long?” Seokjin sighed. “How long do you think you can fend them off if they choose to rise up?” He raised an eyebrow, nodding to the room. “Sure, we’re all here for you—we’re all here for her—but you do really think seven vampires against an army is a risk you’re willing to take?”

You could feel Namjoon’s gaze on you, expectant. It was as if he expected you to burst out into a fit of fear at any minute now. He seemed poised to grab you and run the second you showed any hint of being afraid of the situation—mainly because not all of the vampires in the room had control over their urges.

However, you didn’t even look up at him and instead moved your piece across the board upon the prompt of the die.

When you realized the entire room was holding its breath for your reaction, you looked up and shrugged. “Yeah I should be scared; maybe if I was the same girl I was six months ago. But I’m not.” You chuckled, lifting your chin to meet Namjoon’s gaze.

You won’t let me die, right? You won’t let anyone torture me—you said so yourself. So what is there to be afraid of?

“I think it’s a good idea.”

Seokjin’s gaze was wild, his own fear causing a knee jerk reaction that had Yoongi’s nose crinkling and Jimin holding down Jungkook before he could feed. “Y/N—“

You held up a hand to stop the speech you could sense coming from a mile away. “Hey, this has to happen eventually, right? How long do you think you are all going to be able to keep me a secret? How long do you think I’m just going to sit here like a locked up pet? The humans already know; why not the vampires too? Honesty’s better anyways—builds more trust or something like that.”

“Not all vampires are as tolerant as we are, Y/N.” Yoongi warned, causing you to shrug more to yourself than to anyone else.

“Kay, and? Any of you planning to side-step out of the way of the next vampire that charges at me?”

“No—of course not,” Taehyung murmured. “But Y/N—“

“Then come what may.” You grinned, hoping to relax the tension in the room—all you got was a strained expression from Taehyung and a scoff from Seokjin. “Hey, I didn’t ask for any of this, okay? But I’m here now and this is the sort of shit I’ve got to do. Deal with it. I’m fine with it; you all need to be too.”

“So that’s it then? The decision is made?” Seokjin growled.

Namjoon looked down towards you, eyebrows raised as you let out a harrumph of distress, handing the die over to Hoseok.  “She’s made it. I am easily swayed by her opinion—so if this is what she wants then yes, it’s official.”

You looked up at him out of the corner of your eye.

“I must abide by what my mate decides.” He chuckled, watching with fascination as you ducked your head once more, the barest hint of red lighting up your ears.

~.~

Apparently, this ‘introducing you to the clan’ was more like ‘the king and queen of the fucking world have an announcements for you peasants’ but like, if the king and queen ran a gang.

Okay so a clan wasn’t a gang, but like, close enough.

Namjoon was on this balcony that jutted out over a warehouse floor, leaning over a shoddy railing made of metal and chain link as the entirety of his clan stared up at him.

You knew it was a big clan, like the biggest on the whole continent but holy shit it was big. The warehouse floor was covered wall to wall with bodies and they were all looking up expectantly for whatever big announcement was to come.

You, however, weren’t allowed out on that balcony with Namjoon. Since your fear was far more potent than others and since you had the heart of a jackrabbit you were forced to stand behind a layer of two vampires and watch from the hall. Surprisingly, there wasn’t any fear.

Mostly, you were just awed that there were so many people under the thumb of one man.

Your man.

I’m gonna throw up if you pull that shit one more time, brain.

Namjoon looked over his shoulder at you, raising an eyebrow.

You made a face at him that had him laughing, seemingly causing him to relax.

Was he nervous too?

God, Y/N, how stupid could you be? Of course he was, he was just a hell of a lot better at hiding it than you were. Kim Namjoon looked so damn strong facing this army of a clan. He looked like he belonged there, like he deserved every bit of work and blood that had gone into getting where he was.

And he did.

If there was one thing that you knew about Namjoon, through all of this mess, you knew that he deserved everything he’d achieved.

But, if you squinted, you could see the slight tilt to his shoulders—you could see the way his hands tightened on the railing before him.

If you were stronger, and less afraid of being out in the open in front of a hundred plus vampires, you would have gone out there with him. You would have stood there to try and encourage him as if you actually had the ability to do so. It was so complicated with this man, because you knew you shouldn’t want to encourage the murderer—but while most of you knew the reasons why you were so torn, the stronger part of you adamantly refused them.

You were not and would never be in love with someone incapable of loving you back.

Keep telling yourself that, Y/N.

You knew that stronger part of yourself would eventually tire itself out, and you had to say, you were curious as to what would be the straw that would break it.

But you also didn’t want to find that out either.

Humans are so god damned complicated.

“Alright.” Namjoon’s voice silenced the hum of the crowd below, erasing your thoughts with just a single word. It helped that you could almost sense the fear of those below you, probably because they thought this meeting was held out of anger rather than due to an announcement. Either way, their fear allowed you to leak a bit out of yourself, allowing whatever emitted from you to be swallowed immediately by the two in front of you.

Namjoon straightened.

“Today, I have summoned you all here to inform you of my current situation—seeing as it is out of the ordinary for our kind. Be aware, before I start my message, that I am allowing those who no longer wish to be a part of this clan after today to leave of their own free will. If you choose to do so, after I have finished speaking, no harm will come to you unless you are stupid enough to taunt. May you know that, if you do choose to leave this clan, there will be no mercy shown to you the next time we may meet.”

You could tell that the people below wanted to whisper—they wanted to speak amongst themselves and ask questions that were going to be answered in the next instant. However, they were a well trained clan, hushed by the mere presence of Namjoon. It should have been frightening just how damn powerful the man before you was.

However, you could only imagine him wrapped in a blanket, watching a couple kiss in the rain.

“Don’t humans get sick from this easily? Why on earth are they daring illness for something as trivial as human contact?”

“I have found my mate.”  His voice boomed across the crowd.

A chill slipped its icy fingers up your spine.

That was you—he was referencing you.

Yeah, no shit Y/N. Of course it is you.

Still, the millisecond of fame was flattering—though entirely unwanted amongst vampires.

“However,” his voice silenced your inner ramblings, “she is human.”

Once more, the world broke into silence—complete and utter silence as every single person in the room bit their tongue in confusion, in awe, in shock. You were sure that they had things to say, but even in this moment, Namjoon scared them.

And he, giving them every bit of the leader he was, never once pulled his gaze from the crowd. He never ducked his head, he never hid. “You may speak.”

A thousand voices came from the walls, bouncing off one another. You heard bits and pieces, phrases from different people in different places. It was a cacophony of sound, of anger and betrayal—some of acceptance, but not many. Insults were thrown like bombs, and you let each one hit you with the force of a freight truck.

“A pathetic human?”

“Well where is she?”

“So weak she cannot even face us?”

“This is blasphemous!”

“It has to be a lie!”

“Stop joking with us, humans and vampires can never!”

“Where is this bitch?”

You lifted your chin when Seokjin turned over his shoulder to look at you, a small grimace of a smirk on your features. You shrugged.

You could take insults, slurs, threats. You were known to take a lot of things without fear—verbal wars were the only kind of wars you were good at.

The only kind of war you weren’t afraid of.

Now, maybe if you could see their anger on their faces, see the flashes of red in the crowd, you would find it in you to be afraid.

But again, you were a weak pathetic human hiding behind the protection of vampires.

And then you started to hear the verbal shots fired towards Namjoon.

“Pathetic.”

“I can’t believe he became our leader? How long did he know of this?”

“How could we ever follow a man like this?”

“He’s nothing better than those humans.”

“How dare he?”

“He doesn’t deserve to be clan leader.”

It was a slow boil for you, blood rushing in your ears until that very last insult hit too hard for you. Your anger peaked too quick to be able to stop, the rage burning every last trace of fear from your bones as you gathered your hands into fists at your side.

Without thinking and without any warning—at least, without any warning enough that would allow Seokjin and Hoseok to hold you back from the sheer idiocy of what you were about to do—you burst forward out of the hall and into the light.

You made yourself visible, without a shield, without anything other than you and your anger acting as a barrier between a whole fucking warehouse of killers. But you didn’t stop there. No, you rushed the metal railing, almost as if you were going to launch yourself over the damn thing and into the vampire’s nest below. Thankfully, your better judgment kicked in and only allowed you to crash your hips into the chainlink fence next to Namjoon.

“Shut the fuck up!” You shouted, your voice nearly breaking with the force of your rage. “Shut up!”

Namjoon startled by your side, his eyes boring holes through the side of your face and, were you not too enraged to notice, you would have seen how damn angry he was at you for foiling literally everything.

Plan wrecker Y/N, the only thing you were good at besides tripping over your own foot and cursing for no good reason. Wasn’t it plan wrecking that got you into this mess?

“Who are you to decide that? Huh?” You snapped, hands tightening around the metal dangerously, borderline about to pierce the skin of your palms. “Who are you to decide who deservers what? Did you fight tooth and nail to stand here? No? Are you a god or some other bullshit deity? Huh?” You weren’t giving them time to answer, because, if you did, your nerve would go away and be replaced with fear at your own stupidity. “No, you’re not even close to being a clan leader yourself so why don’t you all just shut the fuck up!”

The crowd was quickly decreasing their volume, if only because there was a crazed human daring to taunt them—you liked the phrase ‘put them in their place’ better but it wasn’t really fitting; it was more like an ant crawling across your barefoot in the middle of summer.

“You followed him long before you ever knew of his mate, and now, because there’s suddenly a human involved you think that he’s lost all sense and can’t be trusted? And you dare call him weak because at least he accepted his fucking fate and did something about it. What the hell are you doing? Are you fucking insane? Do you know how stupid you sound right now?”

The gazes from the vampire’s nest below conveyed a whole array of emotions that you didn’t dare decode or pick apart—probably because you knew that the equation didn’t come out to anything good.

You almost came down from your momentary rage right then and there—if it weren’t for the peanut gallery in the back.

“Human bitch, come down here and we’ll see who thinks they’re a god. You can’t be protected forever!”

Namjoon tensed next to you, about a second from tearing the moron a new one. However, before he could even properly react, you were leaning deeper into the metal railing as you shouted loud enough for the metal walls of the room to echo your voice. “I never claimed to be a god, asshole! At least I’m not saying who deserves what because if I had a damn choice I would be down there shoving a clove of garlic down your throat!”

Hoseok, who had approached you in the hopes to at least force you to let up on the chainlink fence, took a huge step back to fold over to the ground with sputtering laughter.

Apparently a couple other vampires in the crowd found you equally as funny, because you could hear mixed chuckles.

“Y/N—“

But you cut Namjoon off, you weren’t done yet. Not by a longshot.

It takes more courage to deal with humans than it does vampires.

“Say whatever the hell you want about me—I’m the new factor here, the new thing you can’t trust. Your leader is the one that hasn’t changed. He’s the one that you should believe in and put your faith in and continue to follow until the end of your days because I am human and that is exactly what I plan on doing!”

Slowly, you settled back into your heels, your eyes scanning the room for any more complaints as if daring someone to say something more. Like you were actually going to be able to do anything.

What would you do? Fear them to death?

As if coming down from a possession, you felt like you shrank to five times your previous height, your eyes widening as you flit your gaze over to Namjoon. His golden eyes never left your face for even a moment, his lips parted with words he couldn’t say. You thought that, if you could read his mind, you would find all those dead words on his tongue just floating around in his brain.

“I...um…yeah.” You nodded to him as if you could actually read his thoughts. “Yeah.”

“Yeah?” He had a small smile on his face.

You nodded again, this time more to yourself than to him. “Yeah.”

The crowd, after the second half of your speech, broke out into a fresh bout of murmurs—voices rising louder. You couldn’t tell exactly what they were saying, you were too scared to try and discern what was what, who was approving and who wasn’t. You didn’t want to know how many people your existence had caused to leave, you didn’t want to know how much you devastated Namjoon’s efforts simply by being who you were.

And then, you were forced to come face to face with it when the same guy you threatened with garlic you didn’t have, scoffed.

“Are you all really going to let a human’s words affect you like this? Are we now sheep—cattle? Are we now just as weak willed as those we feed from?”  

Before another word could leave his lips—before you could retaliate—the world around you erupted into a flash of pure, blinding white. In that moment, you honestly believed that you died. You believed that the compound had been struck by a bomb, the humans had finally hit. This was the end for you. If this was heaven—or hell, you were pretty sure everyone and their grandmother in this life were going to hell (though the last time you said that out loud the heavy Christian population at the Hunter’s Association literally flogged you)—you didn’t care; it was warm.

It was comforting.

When the brightness passed, when your eyes adjusted to the regular florescent lighting, the world was still alive. You were still alive.

And Namjoon was next to you, his eyes dark with anger.

You followed his gaze to the man who had made it his mission to verbally oppose you every second he got, the peanut gallery in the back who was now folded over, clutching the side of his head. Blood seeped through his fingers, dribbling down his arm. Between his pointer and middle finger was a flap of skin hanging on by a thin stretch, the mangled flesh vaguely resembling what used to be an ear.

“What were you saying, Jisung?” Namjoon’s voice was hard, violent in a way that you had yet to hear. You knew of his capabilities, of how deadly the man that named himself your mate could be when pushed or bored. However, hearing and seeing were two different things.

You said nothing, if only because you were unable to find words anymore. The man, Jisung, only grit his teeth and looked up at the pair of you with anger.

Namjoon looked down at him, his gaze piercing in a way that you had never known it could be.

Perhaps that was because you were the lucky one.

Perhaps that was because you were his mate.

“All who wish to leave this clan, you may do so now.” Namjoon’s voice echoed across the room, quieting the murmurs once more.

There was a dreaded pause, a prolonged silence that continued until the door slammed behind Jisung and his crew, until bit by bit, one by one, vampires left. It wasn’t a lot, but maybe you didn’t want to know just how many people you caused to leave the man you knew was more than capable to lead them to the end. Each person that walked through the door was another apology muttered in your mind, each person that stepped away from the clan another reminder that whatever cloud you had been floating on thinking that life would be peachy-keen was dissipating around you.

Without thinking, you slid your hand towards his on the railing, close enough to link your pinkie with his. Sure, vampires didn’t like touches, they didn’t appreciate the feeling of hugs or hand holding—but this was the only thing you knew you could give him without overloading him.

As if on instinct, his pinkie curled around yours as he peered at you out of the corner of his eyes.

You gave him the smallest of smiles.

To ruin the moment, if only because they could and if only because it was in their archetype to do so, Hoseok and Seokjin came on either side of the two of you, leaning on the railing to assess the crowd.

“It’s a lot more than I thought would stay, I’ll give you that.” Seokjin chuckled.

“A hell of a lot more.” Hoseok murmured. “But you know, Y/N had a point and vampires respect fearlessness.”

You turned to make a face at him around Namjoon. “Since when have I ever been fearless?”

Namjoon’s hand never moved to pull away from yours—despite the fact that your pinkies were still intertwined together. “I didn’t think I’d ever see the day, but you were fearless back there.”

For me.

The unspoken words hung above your head, as if you were both thinking them but not saying them aloud. You didn’t know how, but for a moment, you almost heard the phrase in his own voice—as if you were gaining access to his mind for the first time. You doubted it, but the fact that you knew it was a thought running through his head was telling enough to have you ducking your head to hide your blush.

~.~

The announcement to the clan had allowed you more freedom—well, slightly at least. If you were to go anywhere besides your original level, you were required to have one of the seven with you.

Well, one of the six; Jungkook, despite your positive relationship, still wasn’t trusted to be alone with you—he wasn’t known for his control.

So, it was Seokjin who walked down with you when you decided that you wanted to meet a few of the clanspeople who chose to stay. Namjoon, who insisted otherwise, wanted no part in you risking your life. So, instead, he watched from above on that same railing, his eyes never leaving your form for a moment.

He probably let you go if only because Seokjin was allowed to cherry pick the people that you got to meet.

The first person you were brought to, under the guard of Seokjin and Hoseok, was a clanswoman who was murmuring to a group. She was thin, tall with these sparkling eyes that only intensified when she turned to face you. You couldn’t help the spark of fear nonetheless; however, she seemed to drink it in without reaction. Her eyes flashed red for only a moment before it was blinked away and replaced with a warm brown.

“I’m Jiwoo.” She smiled at you, taking your hand to shake it before Seokjin could even properly introduce you to her. You stared at the point where her skin met yours in baffled confusion. “This is a human greeting, right?” She tilted her head in concern, furrowing her brow on you. “Am I doing this wrong?”

You shook your head, which only seemed to make her smile bigger.

“Y/N, Jiwoo here is Yoongi’s mate. Jiwoo, this is the source of your missing clothes.”

“Ah! I was wondering why he kept thinking he was so sneaky taking things out of my closet! I’m happy they’re finding a good home!”

You, however, were dumbstruck, staring up at the side of Seokjin’s face like he just spoke gibberish. The two couldn’t possibly be more different from one another—but you supposed that you weren’t one to talk when it came to mates. Still, imagining the frowning Yoongi holding hands with the girl who seemed to enjoy contact and smiles was beyond your realm of capability.

“I—“

Her grasp tightened on yours, until she was holding your one hand in both of hers. “Do the boys take care of you okay? They’re all quite hopeless when it comes to the opposite gender.” Her eyes flit between you and Seokjin, worry creasing her brows.

“They do.”

She smiled.

“Why are you holding onto her, Jiwoo?” Seokjin raised an eyebrow. “That isn’t natural.”

“Mm. She’s soft, I like it.” She chuckled. “I like her. “ She grinned in the most adorable way and, for a moment, you honestly contemplated your sexuality. “I mean, I liked her already just knowing that she was our leader’s mate, but I found her endearing up there—I’ve never seen a human so protectively brave before.”

“I’m…I’m really not brave.”

She shook her head, chuckling. “Bravery isn’t measured by quantity, Y/N, only quality.” She winked at you, turning to peer over her shoulder. “I’ll have to see if the boys will allow me to visit with you some more, for now, I have a very grumpy mate somewhere in this room that is trying to find me.”

“I’d like that.”

Her smile only grew as she squeezed your hand once more before letting go entirely. “I’ll see you around.” And then, she was gone, disappearing into the crowd.

You were glad that Seokjin introduced you to Jiwoo first, since she seemed to pave the way for the rest of them—making vampires as a whole become significantly less scary. If there was one vampire with sparkling eyes who appreciated contact, then could they really be terrible creatures?

However, despite how many kind ones you met, how many gruff ones, how many strange ones, how many quiet ones Seokjin facilitated your interactions with, they were all quickly blurring together. You couldn’t remember which one was which; after Jiwoo, the names were gone from your brain, replaced with faces you could only vaguely make out.

Seokjin, angel he was, tried to point out which would be safe for you to go to if need be and which ones you were not allowed to be alone with, but your mind was on the brink of overloading.

“Hyung.” Hoseok murmured when you nearly went cross-eyed and collapsed. “I think she’s reached her limit for today.”

You nodded, looking up at the boy in a way that had him laughing. Seokjin only chuckled when that puppy dog stare of yours shifted over to him.

“Okay okay, no more. But before I take you to bed I have to make sure you’re fed first—Namjoon will kill me if he hears your stomach growling again.”

Feverently nodding, you let Seokjin lead you away from the warehouse floor. Despite yourself, you snuck a glance up towards the railing only to find that Namjoon had already disappeared down the hall.

~.~

You, being you, had carelessly thrown open the door to the bedroom after eating, surprised to find that you weren’t alone. Yes, you supposed your mate would search you out to check on you; however, it seemed that said mate was passed out spread eagle on the bed before you.

Quietly, you muttered a soft. “Namjoon?”

He didn’t respond, rather, he seemed more dead than alive—if it weren’t for the telltale rise and fall of his chest and the gentle snores.

Gingerly closing the door behind you, you padded deeper into the room.

He was probably tired, you noted as you studied his face. It was difficult to sleep in an area you weren’t used to, why should vampires be any different? Since he had holed his ass up in some damn torture dungeon for the sake of your comfort and fear, you felt some sort of responsibility for this exhaustion of his.

Logically speaking, it shouldn’t be entirely your fault—he was a clan leader, he made his own choices, blahblahblah…

However, you weren’t a being built on logic. Instead, the raw emotion tightened something in your chest as he slept.

He was asleep, so it was fine. It was fine. If he couldn’t see, then it was fine to give in to yourself just a little bit.

Just a bit.

It was fine.

Keep repeating that to yourself, Y/N like it makes you any less creepy.

One toe in the waters before you ultimately jumped in—unless your denial was stronger (it wasn’t).

Brow furrowed, you tiptoed your way towards the bed, extra careful so as not to wake him. It seemed he didn’t wake easily, but you weren’t about to take that risk. Very carefully, with the smallest of movements, you inched your way up onto the bed, forcing yourself to the very edge—to the point that you were nearly falling off the bed in an attempt to not interfere with his space.

This was a better position to watch him, like a stalker, but ya know. When else would you get this chance? For once, you could look at the man who saved you without feeling shame or that surge of denial that turned your face red and had you looking away. For once, you could truly see the person who took you from the human world and brought you into his own.

You had to admit, he was handsome. Maybe it was because that pull of fate was so damn strong, but you couldn’t help but find the way his eyelashes hit his cheek adorable, the way his dimples dented his cheeks when he smiled or got excited. You couldn’t stop picturing those gold eyes as they looked at you with curiosity, sadness, happiness, amusement…

Something else?

You found yourself wanting to reach out and touch him—you wanted to hold his hand, you wanted to have that contact that was the line in the sand between you. You stopped yourself if only because you didn’t want him to wake up. You didn’t want him to see you wanting to be close to him.

Instead, you stared at the curve of his lips, laughing at the small bubble of a snore that came out more gurgle than anything else. So maybe this man wasn’t as handsome when he was asleep—but did anyone? You were sure the sight of you drooling on your pillow with one hand buried in your rat’s nest of bed-head was anything but model status.

Your gaze drifted to his shoulders, as if you could remember him folding you over them to bring you inside, to set you against the wheel of a tire. But it wasn’t ever his shoulders you remembered.

Your eyes drooped.

He still had the same smile though.

When did he smile at you before? Somehow, you imagined that he had when he left you at the drop off point—when he first met you, as if he knew he’d see you again.

~.~

You only realized you had fallen asleep when you opened your eyes.

Namjoon’s gaze immediately bored into yours, his stare probably just as intense had yours had been when you watched him sleep moments (moments? Try hours) before. He seemed to watch every miniscule movement with interest, startling your freshly woken self.

When you tried to back away out of embarrassment, you found that his hand was over your outstretched one. Stupidly, you must had tried reaching out for him in your sleep—funny how, even though you didn’t remember what you were dreaming about, it was the best sleep you’d ever had.

“I—I’m—I’m sorry!” You hissed, trying to yank your hand out from under his.

His fingers tightened, refusing to let you go in favor of staring at the point where his skin met yours. “Don’t be.”

You were lucky that you were slow on the uptake when you were first woken up; otherwise you were sure your face would have been the color of lobsters.  

“I…I thought vampires were supposed to have colder skin.” You mused.

Smart. Good distraction Y/N. Couldn’t come up with anything better? Why do humans only talk about temperature when they have nothing else to say? Nice weather today? Ah pretty hot outside isn’t it? Funny how past preconceptions of vampires make my species as a whole stereotype you incorrectly, right?

He only chuckled. “Well, you feel warmer to the touch than I do—but I suppose we are warmer than you think because, while our circulatory system works at half speed, it doesn’t affect our internal temperature.”

You pursed your lips, following his gaze to your hands as nearly all of his words flew right over your head. With nothing better to say, you cut to the chase.

“Why?”

“Hm?” He cocked his head as best he could while lying down.

“Why are you holding my hand? I—I was—I was being a creep.” You whispered. “I don’t deserve hand holding.”

“Is this not what human pairings do? Hold each other’s hands? Admire each other?”

“Since when are we a…’pairing’?”

He raised one eyebrow, giving you that shit eating grin he had when he knew he caught you red handed. “You have no room to complain about personal space, miss ‘creep’.”

You felt the heat rising to your cheeks, and in an attempt to save some face you tried to duck your head out of Namjoon’s sight. However, his nails digging into the skin of your palm stopped you from fully doing so. He drank in the rare moment, scanning every bit of your reddened face. “Is this why you always hide from me when you experience chagrin?”

“It makes it worse!” You hissed, wanting to raise your voice but not finding the energy to do so.

His lips twitched. “I like it.”He murmured softly, his eyes flitting across your face as if he could memorize this moment and be able print a physical copy of it from his brain. “Do that again.”

“Do what?”

“Make your cheeks warm with color.”

“I—“ But you were weak, you were easily afraid, easily talked into things, easily convinced, and fuck, you were easily embarrassed. Your body obeyed his command.

He hissed in air through his teeth. “Why do I enjoy that?”

You laughed, unintentionally leaning closer to him. “Perhaps you are more human than I thought.”

“Mm.” He grunted, eyes never breaking from you. “Perhaps.”