#And I'm scared to interact with anyone or anything because what if it's 40 levels above me how could I possibly know

[emile-hides]

They were not kidding, you really can go anywhere anytime in this game huh

[buzzcutbulldyke]

I posted 9,137 times in 2022

576 posts created (6%)

8,561 posts reblogged (94%)

Blogs I reblogged the most:

@opabiniawillreturn

@aftonfamilyvalues

@terfectly

@buzzcutbulldyke

@kronkk

I tagged 2,811 of my posts in 2022

#my posts - 722 posts

#asks - 173 posts

#hotd posting - 65 posts

#sims posting - 61 posts

#marvel posting - 40 posts

#radfems please touch - 38 posts

#radfems please interact - 36 posts

#what the fuck - 21 posts

#hotd spoilers - 17 posts

#succ posting - 15 posts

Longest Tag: 140 characters

#it's an actually very important thing to keep in mind that is being completely watered down by liberals to the point of uselessness and inco

My Top Posts in 2022:

#5

Anyone pro-prostitution needs to read this book to understand what it is they're supporting. Anyone anti-prostitution needs to read this book to strengthen their position. Anyone undecided on prostitution needs to read this book for a deeper understanding of the topic. Part-memoir, part-sociological study, part-philosophy, this should be considered one of THE feminist texts on prostitution. She clearly did her research over the ten years it took her to write, weaving in quotes from other feminists (both formerly-prostituted and not) as well as statistics, which I always love. Her writing was engaging, the chapters were well-organized, the book had so many amazing quotes—I was constantly stopping to highlight a paragraph that perfectly encapsulated something that many would struggle to put into words. Even as someone who has been staunchly anti-prostitution for a while now, she brought up many things I hadn't known, or hadn't considered, or thought but didn't know for sure, or knew but couldn't summarize my thoughts on the matter. I can't recommend this book more. and it's only 320 pages, not particularly hefty.

605 notes - Posted November 21, 2022

#4

u know ur all jealous of my physical copy of right wing women

See the full post

640 notes - Posted August 27, 2022

#3

straight up I think little boys (I don’t care how young) should get in trouble for the ridiculous porn noises they make at school. it’s sexual harassment, of both their teachers and their fellow students, and I don’t give a shit that they’re children. letting it slide at 7 is just teaching them they’ll get away with it, that sexual harassment isn’t that serious, and then you get them continuing to do it as they age. every single time, they should be punished. my fiancee (elementary teacher) tells me the stories of the shit these boys do and it makes me SO fucking mad, but she isn’t allowed to do anything other than tell them to stop! knowing her, I imagine her demeanor is discouraging to them, but not enough. straight up if I had a daughter in school rn I would be making THE biggest stink about it to the school.

669 notes - Posted September 4, 2022

#2

???????? Again WHO IS THIS MAN he’s just a fucking TIK TOKKER

1,427 notes - Posted October 21, 2022

My #1 post of 2022

You know what was the craziest thing I learned from being married to a teacher? Not that the kids are watching porn and sexually harassing teachers and other students, though that's definitely bad. It's the fact that children cannot read anymore. And it's not like, some of them. 90% of her FIFTH GRADERS cannot read. She writes shit on the board but they can't fucking read it. They don't teach PHONICS anymore, they do this bullshit whole-word reading, and the result is that kids can't sound things out. They literally don't know how to read. This is horrifying to me. They also have no critical thinking abilities and don't even try to do any tasks before deciding they don't know how and it's too hard, like on a level incomprehensible to me. Like she tells me these things and it makes me think like, there's no way the general public is aware of this, right? If you aren't a teacher or a parent you must not know about this. So I am telling you. Watch some teacher tik toks. Read the teachers subreddit. Be aware. Because I'm genuinely very scared of what is going to happen over the next few years. This is fr not good.

This article is from 2019 but it talks about the issue, and touches on the two teaching methodologies

1,657 notes - Posted November 9, 2022

Get your Tumblr 2022 Year in Review →

[mackerelphones]

Why would I post much here on Tumblr until I get more followers? Yet how do I accrue followers without posting?

It's the Twitter catch-22, except I did begin getting some followers there, gradually. Though a number of them have seemed to vanish or go inactive after Musk took over. In my periods of isolation, I took solace in them, too much. I might not have talked to anyone, but I could post a tweet and know the three or four accounts whose owners would reliably interact, and I always looked forward even to seeing their likes, and even more thrilling was when they responded with tweets of their own. To get to that point here, I guess I just need to shill this Tumblr page in enough future YouTube videos.

But the same catch-22 also applies to YouTube, though I still get the most eyeballs there. Creating a video takes an enormous amount of time, particularly for me, because every task takes me longer than it takes other people for reasons I don't understand. Two minutes of a YouTube video, or a video essay anyway, matches at least 40 minutes of creation and usually more. However, in return for this tremendous amount of effort, on YouTube very few people watch my videos, when measured against people who do YouTube professionally. If the Mackerel Phones channel was going to take off after these years, it would have by now. I would be wise to accept that I have failed.

The further problem is that I expect more people have Twitter accounts than Tumblr accounts, so calling on subscribers to follow my Tumblr for updates would be less accessible. Even so, I will.

I just don't have enough hustle in me. Writing is difficult enough normally, and I can barely focus on writing anymore. But being unable to write is about the same to me as feeling myself slowly die. And creating videos feels so pointless, honestly. I've been at the online content thing for most of a decade at this point and still have little to show for it. I am proud of almost nothing I have ever posted and actively dislike even more of it, and my videos and essays that I do regard well I do not consider anything valuable. In the past, I would hit on a video idea and work at it almost obsessively, losing sleep because I stayed up so late editing. When creating "A Pac-Man World of Loneliness," I spent every free hour working on it, no matter how scared and hopeless I felt about real life. I worked on it every day, for hours, for months, and went to bed wanting to get back to it. What happened to that feeling? But even that feeling filled me with sorrow, to feel such emotions over and put such time into a project I considered basically a piss take.

On the other hand, I have come so far and learned so much since I created my YouTube channel and first posted myself reading a terrible poem back in 2016. I can write, record, and edit material of a much higher quality than I would have thought possible when I began seven years ago. The entire process has been a learning experience, much as living for those seven years has been an experience of maturation. And I have met several friendly people as a result of my work on YouTube, and that is precious, very precious. Yet, on some level, even meeting people feels pointless now because whomever I meet online can only ever be distant from me, so no matter how many I might know, I will remain alone. Everything seems pointless. I feel like I had many chances, and I wasted every one, and now it's too late.

Someone once told me, "You have no hope." She meant that I had no ability to believe in a better future for myself or for anything. She was correct. This is why I don't take care of my health like I used to.

I'm sure once I finish up my current projects, though, and nobody cares about them, I'll return to my YouTube video idea backlog to quell whatever voice in my head has driven me to create even what I have so far. I'm sure when I mention my Tumblr on my YouTube channel, I'll get more followers here on Tumblr, too, until maybe someday most of my followers will not be those creepy sexy woman bots. I'm sure I still have plenty of time to, in fact, lead a good life.

I'm sure

[ziracona]

I reread your bit about rin in the last chapter and oh my god im crying. You did my girl justice. I'm so proud of her and i'm glad she had fun. I love the thought that she's helping him in little ways. ;') and oh my god. i love the myers siblings. Do you mind if I ask for hcs? because oooohhhmygod. need more

Awww thank you so much! I really liked the Adam-Rin segment too. I wanted to talk about Rin, but being an Onryo made it so I just couldn’t feasibly in the bulk of the story. Really glad I still got to give her her moment in the sun. : ) Adam’s such a great dude too, and I’m so happy he found meaning the way he did and keeps up such an active and deep relationship with someone who’s passed on. It’s not an easy thing to do, but I think it’s kind, and meaningful. And sure! I’m not sure if you mean Laurie and Mikey or Judith too since I got a few Judith asks yesterday, but ima assume this is ILM related and you’re looking for post-fic Laurie & Michael (sorry if that’s not the intended ask TuT). I did more but this is already a lot so I didn’t post them all haha. Here you go!

Laurie would be very unlikely to make the first move in a romantic relationship. She’s so used to prioritising survival, even when she’s okay again her brain is always, “keep homeostasis” as her directive, and adding a relationship does not fall under that listing. That said, she definitely still develops feelings, and would want things to happen. But I think it would be slow. I think with Laurie, she’d be going to lunches and having long talks and drinks and staying up and falling asleep on the couch together, in and out like each others’ presence belongs in their respective homes, come to each other for support and with hard days and for life advice, go to the theatre together and let them buy her a drink like they always do without being asked, brought back a nice gift from a trip, she waits up for them to get home to greet them, for like 1-3 years solid before one day they just take her hand and kind of smile and she realises she’s been in a relationship for two years and they just never said it, and maybe they won’t now, maybe not for another two years, but they know it, and she’s so happy.

Michael never cuts his hair short, but does not mind Laurie making him let her give him ponytails when they’re working on something, because it does get in his face.

Laurie softballs Michael for a while, since, well, she’s trying to help him reintegrate into society as a human being after having had a childhood that was basically just a 15 year stretch of psychological trauma, and being kind and supportive is a must. But after a few years, she’s gotten much more comfortable and sibling-ish in her interactions. She’ll definitely still be serious and supportive if anything happens and he needs it, but she’ll also give him shit for eating her food or not getting up off the bed she’s trying to make. He enjoys annoying her and does it for fun. Will hold eye contact and eat the cupcake she was saving just to watch her flip, like a cat batting an orange off a counter (or, you know, a sibling who’s feeling /that/ vibe rn.)

Laurie is 99% of Michael’s impulse control. If he and Quentin do something together without her, it /will/ be a disaster, because where Laurie inflicts neutral levels of chaos on the group w her lawful, Michael will almost instantaneously get Quentin to swap from lawful to chaos if she’s not there. They will both be fine, but there /will/ be something on fire when she gets back.

Laurie, walking into the house and seeing then throwing objects into a burning wastebasket in the living room: I don’t like what I’m seeing. Bring me up to speed.

Quentin: So, we maybe have illegally destroyed a car—but it’s okay! We had a good reason! Plus, we destroyed the evidence. Let me explain. So, this guy-

Laurie: :/

Michael: *gives her a ‘what’s your problem?’ gesture*

Michael and Laurie physically fight for nostalgia’s sake sometimes (for fun-get exasperated and performatively MMA. They would not actually injure each other).

One time, Laurie and Michael were walking home together from a movie and a guy drove by and whistled at Laurie and said something vulgar, and Michael stepped into the road and smashed the front of his car with his foot. It was beautiful. They did have to flee the scene but Laurie was /gleeful/. The dude in the car saw his gd life flash before his eyes and rethought some life choices.

It is a long time before Michael is willing to take any kind of meds for his psychosis (very understandably), but when Quentin eventually graduates Med school, six or so years later (bless u Jake for forging him some credits), he is willing to try a few given by him. It is not a good or easy couple of months, but he does it.

Michael gets along surprisingly well with the survivors. Most of them are pretty intimidated, but he’s genuinely chill, and they’ve been through weirder shit so 🤷🏻‍♀️ it’s like “Welp. This might as well happen.” and accept him in. Meg is a big thot. She’s into Susie and would never cheat and Susie knows this, but Meg will still flirt like crazy with Michael bc it’s her personality, and Michael, who’s never had this ever happen, is /beyond/ confused. Every time she says something stupid like, “Damn you’re tall. If I wasn’t a married woman, I’d climb you like a jungle gym.” He gives her the exact look Sam gives Gollum when he’s dissing potatoes in lotr.

Since she knew his and his family’s whole names and his wife’s face, Laurie tracks down Sujan’s family and tells them everything she can about what happened and how good he was, and what a difference the first person in the realm who was kind to her made.

Michael really enjoys traveling. He’s been cooped up his whole life. Spent 15 years in one little white room, and then 40 in reproductions of Haddonfield in the realm. Really, except for his solo journey from Wisconsin to home, he’s never left the state of Illinois. He goes with the survivor squad on their group trips, once he’s comfortable enough, and is consistently amazed. He’s not a very visibly emotive person, and can’t physically be bc of his psychosis symptoms, but his eyes will get big seeing the northern lights from a platform, and he’ll grab Laurie or Quentin’s wrist & point to make sure they’re seeing it too, and Laurie has never been so happy. After his first trip, he very much looks forward to the annual event.

Dr. Loomis is the only thing Michael as an adult has ever feared. (Obviously all humans feel temporary fear, like if a car comes at you or someone with a gun. But past instantaneous shock-fear, I don’t think Michael has ever been afraid of anyone else). This is based off of canon, because to me Michael reads as scared of him, especially in Halloween 2. He pauses and then retreats from Loomis in the first film, and when he sees Loomis running down streets looking for him in 2, he hides (I actually really love the Michael pov in Halloween 2 in the open. It was very humanising). Then, at the end of 2, when he’s blind and Laurie and Loomis have filled the room with ether, and Loomis tells him it’s over, he stops trying to find and kill Loomis and freezes. I genuinely think because he was scared of Loomis and has been for years (after that treatment constantly in isolation as a child, how could he not be?) and has known since he was 6 Loomis wants to kill him, so when he basically says “I’m about to kill you,” he believes him and it scares him. It’s the axe that’s been waiting to drop since he was a kid.

Laurie goes to cons with Nea, Quentin, & Min occasionally, and has dressed up as all three OG Star Wars protagonists like the lovely huge nerd she is. Has also made Michael sit down and watch all the movies w her.

Michael and Laurie go visit Judith a lot. They’ll pack a picnic lunch and talk with her and about her at her grave. It was very hard the first time they went there, especially for Michael, but after a while, it helps. It’s a way to deal with what was done in the past that makes it seem surmountable. It also helps to deal with the loss of someone they both cared for. When they go, Laurie always gets Michael to tell her something about her older sister she hast heard yet. David tracks down an old high school album from 1963, and is able to get three pictures of Judith colorised and they’re able to have a nice full-color photo of her to hang up in the house.