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rodyle-is-a-catboomer · 2 years

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Luna Bittik

Lately I don’t have time to continue my fics and stuff because of college and getting ready for my new job as a programmer, but once I finish inktober (yeah I know it’s November but I want to finish it anyway, better late than never) I hope I can continue writing my stories.

I don’t know if I’m ever going to post them anywhere or just share them with some friends but I think it could be fun to talk a bit about some of my OCs now and then.

So well, the first post will be about Luna Bittik.

She’s a half-elf born in the human ranch of Palmacosta, daughter of two Desian soldiers (a mage named Samuel and a lancer called Undyne). She inherited some kind of unknown magic from her father, but didn’t specialize in magical training because her parents wanted to prevent her from fighting and risking her life, so she studied a lot and became an archives scholar. However they didn’t actually have the time to raise her and gave her affection. As a consequence she grew up as a lonely kid and then she spent her youth surrounded by very old books, scrolls and digitalized files and became very attached to her mentor, Rachel Griffin. Luna’s lack of affection and social experience brought her to idealize Griffin and confuse her admiration for her with a romantic love that was never reciprocicated, since Rachel just saw her as her younger coworker.

Luna had never left the Ranch and only knew about the world outside from books. She had never interacted with humans either and just thought of them as beasts that didn’t catch her interest.

Rachel introduced her son’s Paul to her with hopes of them dating. Luna made the effort to know him just to please Rachel. Paul was a soldier who went to Palmacosta quite often to collect taxes from humans. He was secretly fascinated by them and questioned what the Desians did but never dared to do anything. As a consequence he struggled with guilt and was depressive, but constantly pretended to be fine. Rachel was openly ashamed by him because he was “just a soldier” (unlike her, who was a scholar) and spent too much time outside. Luna and him didn’t work as a couple (he was always wanting to be affectionate to her, which Luna felt uncomfortable about, and he also wanted to talk about his adventures outside, which Luna didn’t want to hear about, and he didn’t read any books, which Luna found unacceptable) and got distanced. Years later Luna heard from a very disappointed Rachel that Paul had “fallen for a human and he even had a child with her, what a disgrace!”. However, he didn’t actually get to leave with her. Later, it was found out that he even had a second child with another human woman.

Luna kept with her work in the archives and eventually met a guy called Timun Moore. He was an engineer who, like her, had nothing to do with the outside world and was uninterested in humans. He only cared about designing efficient software and playing card games. Luna enjoyed his company and they became friends who played cards together after work. Some time later two young soldiers called Scott Azure and Yurin Garik joined their games. Luna felt disdain towards them because of their lower status, but she grew up fond of them as time went by, especially with Scott, who had a shy, meek personality and always talked to her with a timid smile.

One day, the hero Kyle Rice and a human named Iseo Selis came to play with them. Luna vaguely knew that Kyle had volunteered to an experiment to enhance his abilities with expheres in order to fight an enemy of Lord Magnius, and apparently he was considered a hero because of that, but she was uninterested. For reasons she didn’t understand, their lord was giving special treatment to that human, and she carried a baby from him. Kyle was her personal guard. Luna had never interacted with a human before and could only think of her as stupid and boring. Yurin seemed annoyed by her presence too, and Timun didn’t show any signs of interest towards her. But surprisingly, Scott was openly excited and curious about the presence of both, since he admired Kyle and had never spoken to a human either (he had only become a soldier to follow his friend Yurin, and was just starting his training).

Iseo didn’t come back to play with them. Luna heard she had her baby.

Rachel Griffin was struck with the news that Paul had died. It appeared that he had commited suicide. She was overwhelmed by guilt and sadness and she was unable to work anymore, so Luna took care of her as well as she could. That is, very lackingly, without knowing what to say, just trying to remind her to eat and terrified by the thought of ever brushing her hair. She felt sad about Paul’s death too but never talked about that.

Eventually, Luna became accidentally involved in an act of treason. She didn’t know of the details, but apparently Kyle had helped Iseo escape from the Ranch with her baby. As a consequence, Magnius punished him, Scott, Yurin and Blake (Kyle’s partner) and Kyle gravely hurt him in self-defense. Fearing for the consequences, they ran away and took Luna, Timun, Rachel and Scott’s father (also named Scott) with them. They didn’t know if their lord was alive but didn’t want their loved ones to be hurt too.

They found Iseo, her baby and her grandpa because Kyle considered they were in danger too. They wanted to cross the mountains to Asgard, where someone the grandpa knew had a house where they could hide. A confused Luna, who didn’t even care about any of this, met the cold of the forest, which contrasted with the ranch’s heat. She, Timun, Scott and Yurin became sick very soon. All because of that stupid human, Iseo.

Luna decided the logical course of action was to ask for help in Asgard Ranch. Timun followed her while the others told her she was being risky. They were also scared she would tell Lord Kvar about them and be hunted down. She promised she wouldn’t say a thing, because she appreciated them. It was just that she thought their goals had nothing to do with her. She knew nothing of the world and was scared and sick. She tried to convince Rachel to come with them but she said she didn’t want to come back to the place that had killed her son. Luna and Timun left while Blake cursed them for their cowardice and her friend Scott was sad but couldn’t stop them.

They were attacked by human bandits on their way and were gravely hurt. They survived because Luna released her powers with Timun’s help, which instantly killed their aggressors. Then they both fainted. When Luna woke, she found they had been helped by two human young siblings, Kat and Toby. They were the children of doctors and Kat had medical training. She told Luna that their parents had been killed by the Desians and that she had only saved Timun and her because as a doctor she didn’t want to make distinctions when helping people. Toby, on the other hand, wanted to leave them to die and was bitter all the time. Luna was shocked by this. Until now, humans were merely a concept to her. Yes, there was Iseo but they had only exchanged a few words and she had only caused trouble to them. This was the first time she was talking face to face with one of them, looking at her eyes and seeing the pain and the conflict and her noble heart despite all. She was looking at someone who had strong feelings and ideals. Someone who had saved her life. A person, like her, not a beast like she had always thought.

Luna told Timun about her feelings and doubts as they continued their way to Asgard Ranch. He was also reflective and concluded that maybe they had been mistaken about humans. For him, they were just data in the programs he made, but maybe there was more after all.

When they arrived to the Ranch Luna lied to Kvar and said they were just on a vacation travelling around the world. She did talk about the bandits and how Kat and Toby had saved them. Lord Kvar didn’t even react to this and said the siblings were just exceptions among the beasts. Luna and Timun were allowed to stay. They were also offered to work for him, since according to Palmacosta’s reports, they had good careers (Magnius was still recovering and his role as a grand cardinal was temporarily covered by his son, Jeremy, who hadn’t said anything about the incident involving Kyle and the others).

Kvar was also interested in Luna’s powers and how she had killed the bandits. To her surprise, he told her he was planning to have a descendant and that she seemed a suitable candidate to carry his child, given her powerful magic, her perfect curriculum and her beauty. He offered her a large amount of money (a million gald) for the inconvenience. Luna was disgusted by the idea. He was the responsible for the death of Kat’s parents and she definitely didn’t want to be a mother. However, that money... She thought that she needed to compensate Kat... Maybe she could give her that money? She couldn’t bring her parents back, but at least she could solve her life...

So she accepted. She would give birth and then leave. She didn’t want to be a Desian anymore, or have anything to do with them. She could live among humans. It sounded terrifying but also the right choice. Maybe Kat could help her figure out how the world worked? She wanted to learn and be better, be as noble as her. She had not ever cared about anything and her life had been empty and meaningless but now she felt determined. She told Timun about her plan and he said he would leave with her. He didn’t seem so bothered to stay in the ranch, but she was his only friend in the world and would support her no matter what.

Luna thought someone like Kvar would want to have his child artificially, as he seemed cold and uninterested in anything that wasn’t research or intellectual discussion, but he told her he preferred the traditional way. However, he was very clumsy and anxious everytime they tried. It was supposed to be a chore, but he actually seemed to be very affection deprived. Luna was surprised to find him vulnerable, struggling to hug her without knowing how to, with his arms and legs covered in many scars that he wanted to explain but couldn’t find the words. She felt very drawn by this facet of him, and at the same time it was like looking at herself in the mirror. She was also cold and a mess expressing her own feelings, never able to open her heart to Rachel, or be affectionate to Paul or to her friends, wanted to be loved but always shut in her own world of academia and strict rules, which was sadder but more confortable than the idea of touching someone’s hand and being rejected. It was painful to see him wanting to touch her so badly but not knowing how. She also felt the growing urge to touch him too, but refrained. He was Kat’s enemy. Therefore he was her enemy. She lied on her back and grabbed him sharply and helpped him finish his task. No caresses; she didn’t want to even try and found herself trapped in her thirst for someone like him. She was only there to had his kid, grab the money and leave.

Luna became pregnant and Kvar became painfully but shyly desperate for her to stay with him, since she had told him she would leave after giving birth. He behaved weird when he was with her, his mask of coldness not very stable anymore. It was so weird to see someone as powerful and dangerous as him being so confused around her. He told her she could stay if she wanted to. That they could marry if she wanted to. His hands trembled everytime he touched her growing belly. It was the only time he was able to allow himself to touch her affectionately. Luna tried to have her mind empty everytime he did it. She didn’t care about him, obviously. She didn’t care about that baby. She didn’t want to know what names he had thought for them. It was just work. He touched her belly with his hands covered in gloves and still felt warm and close and she craved for feeling that touch in her face. But she didn’t want to think about that. Everything would be left behind and would not matter. She felt the weight of that baby inside her but obviously they weren’t hers. It was just Kvar’s. That baby would grow and became a mini tyrant like him, and she didn’t want to have anything to do with that. The baby was doomed and was irreparable but it was not her problem. She only wanted to leave and help Kat.

The baby was born. It had been so painful. What was the use of that pain? She was going to leave them. She didn’t want to hold them. She didn’t want to see how Kvar held his child as if they were the most valuable thing in the world. His mask finally broken with that very small copy of him. Obviously, they only looked like him. His hair color, eye-shape... Yes the baby was dark skinned like her, and she heard Kvar say they had her eye-color, but she didn’t care. Kvar told her he had named their daughter Aska, like the light spirit who worked with Luna, the other light spirit.

What would happen to Aska? What kind of person would she be as she grew? Would she be as emotionally damaged as her parents? Unable to touch the skin of others, to show her very heart to her loved ones? Luna didn’t want to know. So she left and took Timun with her. Her loyal friend was leaving his safety and a well-paid job for her, and she realized she had never hugged him either.

They found Kat and Toby. Luna gave them the money, all of it, without any proper explanation. Kat looked at her and noticed the weight that weird (ex)Desian was putting on her. Her desperation and her clinginess. Luna was paying her to find meaning in her life, to compensate the crimes her people had done, and Kat felt overwhelmed and creeped out by this. She didn’t want to be the center of Luna’s purpose. That money (which probably was full of blood) was like a curse. She didn’t want to keep it. Luna insisted and Toby grabbed it because they needed it. They had nothing, after all, because of those monsters. Kat told her to leave. She didn’t want to be involved with Luna and see her again.

And Luna left with a lot of pain and confusion. She somehow had expected that Kat would be grateful and would help her. But of course, Kat was right to be suspicious. She was trying to buy something intangible. Just as Kvar had tried to buy her love but failed. She had paid with money that was not only made with the child of Kat’s enemy, but also with people like her parents’ suffering, with their deaths. It was normal that Kat didn’t feel comfortable with her appearing and paying.

But that meant Luna and Timun were all alone in a world they didn’t understand. Luna didn’t want to be a Desian. Maybe her attempts to make a friend among the humans had failed, but she was determined to keep with the side of goodness and justice. They would have to struggle, but Timun and her would never touch bloodstained money again.

The following years, Luna and Timun tried to live in Luin. Luna did shitty works where she was constantly harrassed and insulted for being a half-elf, but at least she could paid a tiny house for them. TImun stayed at home, too overwhelmed to face the world and look for a job. The room where they slept was so small and cold that Luna eventually found herself hugging her friend at nights to keep herself warm. She cried many times thinking about her past life, her books, her friends, Rachel, the card games, the confort of living inside the ranch. Now she was always hungry. The humans didn’t accept her. They obviously didn’t know she and Timun used to be Desians (she now was sure they would hurt them for that) but they resented and distrusted half-elves in general. And Luna understood that. But it was so painful. She herself resented her own decisions. And resented Timun because he barely left their house while she was working countless hours the jobs no one wanted to do. She shouted at him frequently, and insulted him, and then hugged him because he was all she had.

She often wondered how her life would have been if she had stayed with Kvar and Aska. But then she would have been an accomplice. And not a minor one, like she used to be, but the wife of a monster. Would her daughter become a monster too? But at least she was warm, and had food and safety... Did she like reading, like her? She couldn’t afford books anymore and didn’t have the time to go to the local library anyway. How would feel to hug her, to hold her in her arms and brush her hair and talk about the books they loved? Did her father hug her? She was sure he did, because he held his baby so dearly. Her heart ached but she repeated to herself that she had done the right thing.

One day, just when Luna was getting ready to work, someone knocked the door. Luna opened and found a teenager girl. She wore a hat that covered her ears, and a long coat. She had long straight hair, almost white. Her eyes were purple and almond-shaped, and her skin was brown. The kid seemed very nervous but also excited. Luna was sure she was a half-elf. And that she was also... No, it couldn’t be... Obviously it wasn’t possible...

- A-are you Luna Bittik? -said the teen nervously.

- Yes... -Luna managed to reply.

- I'm... Aska of the Tempest... Your daughter... I’ve always wanted to know you...

#oc #my oc #luna bittik #tales of symphonia au #kvar #desian #this was meant to be just a short explanation of luna's background and it ended up being this #i didn't expect it to be this long #i decided to cut it here because the part that comes after that is long #i was just waiting while this version of unity installed but here i some hours later without no work done

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wizzardhat · 3 years

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one thing that annoys the hell out of me is the way that sexism has functionally destroyed the usefulness of the term "mary-sue" for any meaningful literary discussion. And yeah I know mary sue was originally a disparaging term for fanfic ocs or whatever, but it does functionally serve to describe a phenomenon that to my knowledge doesn't have it's own term: a character that should be likeable, because they have lots of positive traits, but is ultimately difficult to connect with because they lack the kind of flaws that make them relatable and/or give them depth. Things a mary-sue is not: any hyper-competent female character, any hyper-competent character in general, any character who has an innate skill or talent that is rare in their setting, any character that seems like they may be an author self-insert, any character that is flat or boring, or any character who is at the center of a chosen-one narrative where that trope is played straight.

A mary-sue, to me, is a character who looks good on paper but is missing a spark that makes them feel like a real person, and as a result they feel a little hollow. This isn't actually inherently a bad thing, depending on the type of story you want to tell. If you are making a very plot driven story that is meant to feel mythic, where the actions of the characters matter less than the action of the story as a whole, and the main conflict of the story is the characters pushing back against outside forces, than a mary-sue isn't a big deal. But when you are writing a very character driven story where personal choice and interpersonal relationship is the focus, and it is vitally important that your audience be able to identify with your characters and find them relatable or at least believable to ground themself in the story, than you can easily shoot yourself in the foot by making a character who can do interesting things but is not themselves a particularly interesting person.

But for some reason the use of the term mary sue has kind of been watered down to mean "if a character is percieved by me to be female, and can do interesting things, but I do not personally find her to be compelling, than she is a mary sue." and I think that's kind of a waste

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sideblogformindtrash · 4 years

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A GUIDE TO RUNNING ON THE WOODS ™

Keep in mind this is mostly based on the forests I’m familiar with and my own observations: highlands; temperate climate, very few species of large predators. This may vary for tropical and boreal forests, as well as country-wise; geography is also highly variable; Also, this intended as a writing resource for a community that likes to torture their ocs; don’t take this as survival tips, I’m just some dude on tumblr.

CW: Just about anything that can happen on a forest that I remembered about.

General/Terrain-wise:

-The floor likely won’t be plain. There might be plenty of spaces that will require climbing or careful descent; there might be places where the ground isn’t steady;

-If it has rained recently, the floor will be slippery; it’s very hard to climb. If the soil is mostly of clay, it’s almost like running on soap. In that case, places that are used as a passage (trails and such) are much more slippery than the ground around, due to lack of leaves/branches and also the process of compacting the floor that occurs on frequently used trails;

-If it is raining while you are on the forest, branches, fruits and maybe whole trees will fall. It’s easy to get hit by it. Pine trees, specially, are very likely to drop branches and pines.

-If not following a path, there will be plenty of branches making the passage difficult; a lot of them on the floor. It’s easier to trip and get cut on the branches that are fallen than the ones that are closer to the eye-sight so plenty of cuts and bruises will be on the legs.

-There are holes on the floor made by burrowing animals. If it’s dark or you are running, is very easy to break a leg by falling on one of those.

-There are probably some river-streams on the forest. Most might be tiny, but crossing them can be tricky, the rocks are slippery and might be sharp;

-This river-streams are likely at a lower level than the rest of the terrain, causing a stiff descent – river – ascent terrain shape, like a V.

-If the forest is just a patch in the middle of a rural area: somewhere there will be barbed wire. People still like to divide their territory even if it’s in the middle of nowhere.

-There might be bridges, but the estate they are in might be bad; or they may be just pieces of wood far apart with room to trip.

Animals:

-Most mammals and birds are very unlikely to be a bother on the forests. But arthropods will. It’s possible to step on ant-hills or get caught on spider webs. It’s unpleasant, but, most spiders aren’t very poisonous (largely depending on where exactly you live).

-On the other hand, plenty of caterpillars can be dangerous; varying from causing burns to species that can kill you from shock. Caterpillars stay on tree branches, some of them have colors that make them mask with the trees and leaves, so it’s very easy to accidentally touch one while holding a branch; specially for someone on a panic;

-There are mosquitoes. A. Lot. Of. Mosquitoes. They are annoying but following the swarms might indicate a water-source. Lakes and swamps might have leeches;

-BATS: they tend to fly on open paths; if there is a trail on the forest they’ll follow it instead of going through the middle of trees or over them. They are also little bitches and like to go close to your head to mess with you; but they are very unlikely to attack. Most of them eat insects, fruits and plants.

On rural areas:

-There might be agressive dogs trained to protect the households or the other animals;

-Cattle itself isn’t friendly either. They’ll try to avoid you most likely, but if you get too close they will attack. Cows can be very aggressive. (Sure, they can be docile too if they have a lot of human contact, specially towards their owners, and are pretty intelligent animals, but cattle on a pasture is unlikely to be trained to be docile and will see a stranger as a treat). They are more likely to attack if they have youngs. Imagine running away from your whumper just to die to a cow.

-The one above also apply to goats, sheeps and llamas. Pigs are generally not agressive and will more likely just run.

Water/Food:

-Still water is the less safe to drink. Clear, running streams are safer. The closer to the spring source the less likely to be polluted; however is never safe to drink a large amount without being sure.

-They might contain parasites; however, parasites take a while to manifest any type of symptom and are manageable. Dehydration isn’t. This is to short term-forest scenarios. Some parasites will cause diarrhea, that will lead to further dehydration.

-If lacking in options, a way to filter the water is digging a hole close to the water source and getting the water that fills the hole; the dirty and rocks will help filter it somewhat.

-Rainwater is the safest source; As well as indirect sources such as fruits; however very non-reliable.

-Some trees have thorns on the branches or on the trunk. Some of them have on vines, too.

-There are crabs on freshwater! They aren’t too hard to catch, it can be done by having a small net and causing some movement in the bottom of the stream; however they are usually very small so not a huge food source.

-Insects, if not venomous/poisonous, are food ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

-I’m trying to write about frogs, but like, we have a distinction between sub-types of frog that make this easier but for what I can see on English, everything is just frog or toad so………… maybe take this with a grain of salt, but:

-Frogs can be food too. Some of them are really dense and will just let you catch them. HOWEVER HYLYDAE FROGS AND TOADS ARE POISONOUS. On the case of toads, they have poisonous glands on their skin; they might be safe to eat if the person knows how to remove those;

-AS A GENERAL FOR ANIMALS: THE MORE COLORFUL SOMETHING IS, THE MORE LIKELY IT IS POISONOUS;

-There are about 50.000 plants that can be eaten, but aren’t cultivated so we tend to not know about them. There are plenty of plants that have some medical use, as well.

Medicine:

-Calendula and Arnica might be some ya’ll might like; they help with cicatrization and easy muscular pain.

-Lighting a fire on a humid forest is very very very difficult. Soggy wood and green leaves don’t like to burn. Philodendron imbe can be used to soothe Burns (it has to be slightly cooked). (I can write more on this if someone is interested).

-Is possible to be mostly immune to poison ivy burn. It’s an allergic reaction; albeit a very common one. However it’s also possible to get more sensitive to it overtime;

Caves:

-There are wet and dry forests; on a temperate forest, while it’s possible to find caves, they’ll likely be flooded or have small, discreet entrances that someone won’t notice on a panic. When on doubt, follow the bats.

-It’s. Dark. It’s ungodly dark. Think the darkest room you’d ever been at: it’s dark. The passages can be very narrow, barely fitting a person. The terrain inside can be very irregular and full of holes as well.

-Caves are humid even if they don’t have rivers inside them anymore. They also have their own mini-climates that tend to be stable during the whole year; And while some are cold, there are also some that are warm. They might be a good place to stay if the outside temperature is freezing cold, as long as not losing sight of the entrance.

-They house snakes, scorpions and spiders. Again, baths won’t bother you, but you can get sick from the guano (from breathing fungi spores of H. capsulatum that grown on it); or get an accidental scratch when they are diving for the outside;

#whump #whump writing #whump scenario #whump prompt #whump writing resource

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helenarlett-rex · 3 years

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Time for an annoyed author to make a little rant...

So I have a certain client who keeps commissioning me to write stories for them. A lot of the stories are not what I would normally write. This client has a highly specific fetish and I’m not very good at it. Not saying it’s a bad fetish or anything, just that it’s outside my realm of experience so I don’t know what I’m actually doing. (I was literally born without the ability to experience the particular thing theses stories center around. Picture asking a blind man to describe color... That’s not what’s going on here because I’m obviously not blind, but it’s a fair analogy of what I’m being asked to do.) But I value anyone who is willing to hire me and pays me well, and the client is a very nice and understanding person, so I don’t want to say anything bad about them. But there is one thing that kind of bugs me. And it’s the fact that this client wants the stories I write for them to remain private. That’s fine and all. They are paying for the work so they are entitled to have it kept private if that is what they want. But they are literally the only person I’ve written for who ask for this. Everyone else I’ve written commissions for love having their stories posted on my eka’s gallery. And that’s really great for my advertising too. Because then other people can read it and be like, wow, I can get a story like this commissioned? And it brings in more business for me. Just like when you see artwork from someone and you like how it looks so then you want to commission that person to make artwork for you as well. But with written story commissions I feel like having the ability to publicly post those stories is even more important than it is with artwork. Because, yeah, they can read any of my non-commission stories and see what my work is like, but with the commissions it also allows others to see my ability to write from instructions instead of just writing whatever I want to write. It shows my ability to work with characters that aren’t my own and stories and situations that aren’t my usual style. (I don’t know... Maybe that is the same with art, but either way I feel like it’s still important for people to see that.)

Still... the client comes first so if they don’t want that work shown to anyone, then I won’t do it. But it’s still annoying, especially when 90% of my commissions tend to come from that one client. Every time I make a post saying, hey, commissions are open, I generally only end up with like, one commission (if I’m lucky) that I can actually post publicly and the rest of the slots all end up going to that one person who wants them private. I’m really worried about the kind of image that is giving other perspective buyers. There are all these people on this website I use who follow me, so they all see it every time I make a post about commissions being open, and then they will maybe see one commission following that at most. Sometimes they don’t see any commissions follow such posts. And I’m really worried about how that must look... Do people see that and start to think that the reason I don’t post any commissions after opening up commissions is because no one will commission me? Do they start to think that maybe no one will commission me because I’m not good at working with commissions? Everyone seems to love my work, but maybe they see my lack of posted commissions and think that I’m no good at finishing stories that I’m not personally interested in writing. Or maybe I’m a pain in the ass to work with and so no one who had commissioned me in the past will ever commission me again... Meanwhile I’m sitting over here like, I really am taking in a lot of commissions, I promise... It’s just that every time I open up for them this one person buys up all the slots right away and won’t let me show anything I write for them...

This is really annoying. Especially when I work really hard to produce quality work for this person even when I’m having to write about something I can’t physically experience myself. Like, seriously... The rest of y’all have five senses. I was only born with four. But I’ve still been able to take the one I don’t have and turn it into something (that I’m told at least is) sexy. That feels like quite an accomplishment to me and wouldn’t it be great if I could share that so other potential buyers could see what I can do? Instead I have a whole folder full of stories that I’ve spent days and weeks crafting that no one will ever see outside of that one person.

And you know what I’ve noticed... I’ve noticed that every time I open up commissions I get less and less inquiries about it. I never have to worry about not being able to make money because that one person is always there to buy up any untaken slots, but less people in general ask about commissioning me. I’ve reached the point where I never have to turn anyone down because all the slots are full. And that seems like a bad thing... That tells me the lack of proven work from commissions really is starting to have a negative affect other people’s opinion when it comes to hiring me. I mean, I’m grateful for this client always being there to pay me for personal stories every time I’m in need of some quick cash... But what if one day that happens and for whatever reason that client isn’t there anymore? What if I’m in a bind and I open up commissions to help pay for some immediate expense and no one is willing to hire me because, “Every time she opens up commissions she never gets any. Her work is really good so if people won’t hire her there must be some kind of serious problem with working with her.”

I just delivered a commission to this client yesterday and it was one I was extra proud of. The client asked for a female character to interact with his OC in the story and gave me no details about what he wanted for the character other than the species. So I was left to create a character all on my own. And I really liked this character I created. I also really liked a certain scenario that I wrote with the character. I’m sitting there thinking, Oh god... I may be Ace but this is fucking hot... I liked it so much that I was like, I’ve got to find a way to post this.

So I asked my client if I could post it if I swapped his character out for a different character and changed the ending and a lot of other things (Because the ending I originally wrote that had me so turned on ended up being something my client didn’t want and I had to write something else.) So basically I wanted to write a totally different story, the story I actually wanted to write, about this character I created, which would have been very different from the one I delivered to the client. I asked him if he would be okay with that, since I would end up copying and pasting the text from that one scene to make it... And he says he guesses he’s okay with that, but I would also have to change the species of the girl in the story because, and I quote, “Peeps will know it's me. I've com'd that exact scenario recently like 12x”

First of all, I’m like, what...? You’ve commissioned 12 different people for twelve different versions of the same story...? Wow, umm... okay... Whatever floats your boat... But then it dawns on me that I’m wanting to write a story about a character I created and own, and just used in your commission because you didn’t give me any details for the female part, and you’re telling me I have to change her species if I want to write it... First of all... this is my character... You just borrowed her... and secondly... nothing about the scenario I wrote and want to share even works if she is a different species...

So honestly, I’m understandably upset... First I’m losing business in the long run because this client won’t allow me to share their commissions... something literally everyone else does... And now I’m being told that I can’t even used my own character in a particular scenario because I’ve already used it once for them. As far as I know, no one can own a scenario... a situation... That would be like Bozo the Clown telling the Three Stooges they can’t hit anyone in the face with a pie because he owns that. Or me telling everyone they have to get around in wheelchairs now because I wrote about a character walking so I own walking now and I’m not willing to share it. It doesn’t work like that... And to tell me that I can’t use my own character in said scenario... This client has requested other characters of mine in stories as well... Next am I going to be told I can’t use Molly the Mouse in any more of my Miss Smalls stories because they have requested her in two of their commissions before?

I’m wondering if I should just change my commission policies and refuse to offer private stories anymore. But at the same time, I do kind of rely on the money I make from this client a bit more than I would like to, and I’m worried that if I stop offering that, and he stops commissioning me, that I won’t be able to get by on commissions anymore. Like the damage is already done... I just don’t know what to do...

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scandalousfemale · 4 years

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Ch.1 End of the World As We Know It

Chinese!OC x Kelce

This wasn’t supposed to happen. Zombies were meant for apocalyptic movies and TV shows where one could binge watch for a day and return to their mundane life. But something happened, a lab test went wrong and suddenly the outbreak started. This story takes place exactly three weeks after zombies slowly started to take over the planet.

Series master list

WC: 3,445

Warnings: this is a zombie apocalypse fic, mentions of zombies, mentions of death, slight mention of ripping of flesh but not much, mentions of weapons!!! Knives!, mention of sewing up a wound, someone got sliced with a knife and needs to be sutured, mentions of fear

A/N: To every single person who has shown interest in this, thank you so much. Whether it’s because you were excited for a Kelce fic or you were excited for (finally) an Asian oc/face claim, just know that your support kept me writing this. I loved every second of writing this first chapter, it’s one of the first, in a while, that came really easily to me and I am so in love with the characters already. Again, thank you so much for your support and your feedback. You all keep me going. Now, please, jump into this AU with caution. Some might not make it out.

It is widely believed that right before you die, your life flashes before your eyes. Kaili wondered, sitting in the empty and dark pharmacy by herself, if her cousin was granted that mercy. She can still hear the echoes of Wei’s piercing scream, forever haunted by the thought that maybe she could’ve done something to save her. But she couldn’t have. And there was no way that her death could’ve been peaceful enough to collect a couple of seconds to remind her of a life before this.

Hell, it was hard for Kaili to remember a life before this. The scattered news reports said that this outbreak had started about two or three weeks ago— she’s lost count, that there had been a mistake. The labs were trying to test out a new vaccine, one that could cure people of any potential virus that would have affected the human race and become the next pandemic, but something had gone wrong. Though she didn’t trust the reporters to tell the public much of the truth to begin with, the people have been saying that the virus had begun in New York, where scientists were trying to inject an gene editor into the bloodstream. It was supposed to make the recipient stronger and their immune system more durable for whatever that came their way. In a way, it did. When the first volunteer died, their body carried on living...lunging forward, biting, and passing on the mutant gene to anyone else who had gotten bit.

That brings us to the problem at hand and why Kaili was trying to silently mourn the loss of her family as her backpack full of first aids and snacks were flushed against the wall behind her. She had seen the news of the outbreak on her campus TV and gotten in the car, headed straight for her family. She was just hoping that they wouldn’t have been freaking out, seeing as it would be easy to panic when all they saw were images of people ripping each other’s face off and they don’t understand the language very well

Kaili is first generation American, stemming from Chinese immigrant parents. They worked so hard to make sure that she never had a want for anything that she truly needed but in doing so, they’ve neglected a lot of their own necessities. When she was smaller, she’d ask them for seconds and they would make sure that she’d be full, even if that meant that she ate their food. Of course, once she caught on, she’d stopped asking, even sometimes putting more on her parents plate than her own.

The feeling of her heart thumping fast in her chest when she saw her house lingered in her still. The anxiety never really rid itself from her. The images of her parents crouched on the front lawn, devouring her aunt and uncle in law still flashed in her head. She didn’t even have time to cry when her cousin, Wei, jumped into her car and told her that she heard it was safer if they started going down south. As long as they got away from the epicenter that is New York. Both girls didn’t have a chance to grieve their parents until they were out of Maryland and on the way to Florida.

Of course, they never made it that far. They’d spent a week holed up in an underground parking lot, just processing the information. Looking up the news until their phones ran out of battery. Some days the girls barely spoke to each other, they’d just share a knowing look, a touch that would let the other know that the pain was acknowledged but they wouldn’t speak much of it.

Then, when they started to slowly come out of grief and into self preservation, they started on their trip again. Which wasn’t exactly easy. Of course, cars needed gas and people— the living, needed food and sleep. So, even on their journey, they were forced to stop. Sometimes they’d meet others along the way, especially those who swarmed the grocery stores and took everything that their arms could carry but most times it still felt like a normal day. There were people who believed that it was just an isolated incident in an isolated state.

When they reached South Carolina though, it felt like a ghost town. They’d decided to go to a grocery store and usually they were good at their surroundings but maybe the town just felt too safe. Too...empty. Wei walked in without being careful and the flesh eating monsters heard the bell of the door. They’d swarmed her before she even got the chance to pull out her weapon.

Kaili didn’t like sleeping anymore because of that. She doesn’t even remember screaming at the sight but she must’ve because the attention was suddenly drawn on her. And so she ran to the closest empty shop she could find and she’s been stuck here for the past two days.

She’d cried. A lot. She cried so hard that she became tired but she wouldn’t allow herself to sleep, pulling energy drinks from the fridge from the drug store, not like it helped. It’s funny how trauma has a way of taking care of you against your own wishes. Her body had shut down on her and she fell asleep on her pharmacy’s floor. Even if only for a little bit, she woke up only to sob again, knowing that she wouldn’t exactly get far on her own and even if she did, she wouldn’t really know where she’d end up.

She had forced herself to stay hydrated and eat, even when she didn’t want to. Even when the look of some consistency of food made her vomit because it reminded her of the flesh that the monsters outside the doors would eat, she knew that she had to keep her energy up for when she was ready to make the move. Needless to say, she was scared. She’d never faced one of these creatures alone before but now, she figured it wouldn’t be as different as when Wei and her used to kill them together. She just doesn’t have anyone watching her back this time.

On the afternoon of the second day in hiding, the sound of glass shattering pulled her out of her self pity and planning. She had quickly crawled and hid behind a medicine cabinet, listening for who’d broken into her sanctuary.

“I’m sorry, I don’t think the entire Charleston has heard you, JJ, can you do that a bit louder?” An annoyed female voice hissed.

Great, Kaili thought to herself, I guess dying by the hands of humans might be better than being ripped to pieces. She’d run into other humans before, some nice and others not but in a deserted town like this where not even one car is in sight, she’d doubt that this group of people were all too friendly.

“Can you two just shut up and fill the bags?” A gruff male voice spoke before sounds of bottles rattling on top of each other filled the space.

While trying to pay attention to the noise and the people in front of her, she had forgotten to check behind her, used to having Wei be there. A rookie mistake.

“What do we have here?” A blond man spoke from behind her. He couldn’t have been older than nineteen years old, yet his cold eyes told a story only that of someone who’d seen too much can tell. Then again, she supposed they’ve all seen too much at this point.

Before she could even register his words and answer them, she’d pull the knife from the band on her thigh, instinct took over. The boy jolted backwards, knocking over the medicine shelf behind him.

“Whoa, there little lady,” the startled boy shifted his eyes around the room, relaxing when his friends came to stand by him. She was outnumbered and though one to three wasn’t that bad of a fight, she didn’t want to take the risk, especially after seeing the man stood by the blond. He towered all three of them.

“Are you alone?” The female spoke, a softness in her tone that Kaili hasn’t heard since the outbreak had started.

Instinct told her to lie but what was the point? So, she nodded once.

“Do you speak English?” The tall boy asked, which earned him a scowl from Kaili and a scoff from the girl next to him.

“She literally just responded to me when I spoke to her, what kind of a dumb ass question is that, Rafe?”

Okay, so the tall one was called Rafe, that means the blond had to be JJ, Kaili inspected them, eyeing their clothes and their weapons— or lack thereof.

“She’s just staring and I don’t know whether to be turned on or creeped out,” JJ said, caught in the middle of the two glaring at each other. A comedic relief, of course.

“I can speak English,” Kaili said, her voice coming off tense and dry. After all, she hadn’t used it in two days except to sob, and even then, she tried to cry in silence.

“Sorry, we’re so rude,” the female shook her head before she stepped forward as Kaili stepped back, not expecting the sudden movement, but the girl in front of her acted like she didn’t notice. Her smile was warm, her age probably mirroring that of the blond.

“My name’s Kiara,” her hand still outstretched as Kaili switched her blade to her other hand and took it cautiously, “this here is JJ,” she pointed to the blond as he flashed his canine at her in a smile that had a deadly edge to it.

“And that’s Rafe,” she pointed at the tall man who seems to be a little older than the rest of them, maybe a little bit closer to Kaili’s twenty-three.

“I’m Kaili.”

A beat passed, where no one moved or had said anything and Kaili strapped the blade back to the outside of her thigh, alongside the others.

It was as if the group had seen her for the first time and she wondered what that sight must’ve looked like to them because to her, it would seem like she’s a broken little girl playing dress up.

“Wait, you know how to fight?” JJ asked, not hiding the shock in his voice had he eyed her weapons.

“I know how to survive,” she shrugged. She had a small obsession with switchblades when she was younger, that had turned into a throwing knives obsession but when it came to shooting or fist fighting? She was at a loss.

They eyed her clothes. Black pants with a weapons belt wrapped around her hips and down her thighs. Her black long sleeve shirt was tucked neatly into the waistband. She looked like a mercenary and it was all thanks to Wei. The day of the zombie attack was Wei’s birthday and so she was stuck in her birthday dress for days before the younger girl made it a mission to raid an abandoned store for some new clothes. Something about how it’s not practical fighting in a skirt, no matter what comic book says. She used to laugh at the thought but thinking about it now hurts her.

“Do you know…” Kiara began to ask before Rafe put his hand on her shoulder and shook his head but she only gave him a desperate glance.

“No,” the boy pulled at her but JJ broke his grasp, standing in between them, as if he was protecting Kiara from a potential threat.

“Do you want him to die?” Kiara grit through her teeth from behind JJ.

“We don’t know her, do you want to die?” Rafe hissed back.

“We don’t exactly have a choice.”

And so they continued their whispered argument and Kaili pretended not to hang on to every word, when she'd heard enough, she had responded to the question that hadn’t been asked.

“I know first aid, well, a little more than first aid. My mom is a doctor,” a lump formed in her throat when she realized what she had said, “was a doctor,” she corrected herself.

“Then it’s settled,” Kiara spoke, “we will allow you to join our group if you can help our friend. He’s suffering from a knife wound to his abdomen, it’s deep. He’ll need stitches, maybe. I don’t know. We’ve been using cotton and tape for now but he’s losing blood and color and let's be honest, we don’t know anything about what kind of equipment or medicine we need. So, can you help us?” She said with a desperate tinge in her tone.

Kaili had never been so grateful in her life that she had suffered from wounds before from playing rough until her mother had gotten so upset that she’d learn to dress her own mistakes.

“Depending on how much blood he’s lost and if the wound is infected, I can help,” Kaili responded as she went around the pharmacy, getting everything that she thought she’d needed. After about five minutes, she’d met them at the front of the door with six plastic bags.

“In case someone else gets hurt,” was her explanation for the bags. JJ laughed, muttering something about liking her already as he took some bags off of her hands and they walked out of the shop.

Rafe stalked ahead of them, a gun in his hands, as Kiara fell in line with Kaili.

“Thank you, again for this. I know you don’t know us and you could have said no. So, even if that one,” she nodded at Rafe, “isn’t going to say it, just know that we are grateful.”

“Don’t thank me yet, I don’t even know if I can save your friend,” Kaili’s reply was short but not harsh, as she wasn’t trying to be rude. She just meant to be truthful.

Rounding the corner, a van came into sight. No scratch that, it can’t even be considered that, it was more like a tour bus.

“Topper and his theatrics,” Kiara explained, as if Kaili would know what a Topper is, when she saw the girl’s eyes widen, “Gretchen Wilson was having a concert when everything had gone down. I guess they all died or something because her bus was left behind, with a full tank of gas and water, I might add.”

Kaili just nodded, a loss for words as she followed them to the bus and then up the stairs to the inside of this luxury transportation. She couldn’t believe it. She took a quick glance around the space noting the kitchen, beds, tv, and bathroom but the most important thing she noted was that there were more people than the group who came and got her. She expected maybe one extra person, of course, the one who was hurt. Not six more people. Kiara had locked the door behind her and suddenly, Kaili was feeling a little bit less comfortable.

“I thought I told you not to pick up any strays,” a voice called from the driver’s seat. An older looking blond boy with blue eyes had faced her.

“Chill out, Top, she’s here to help,” Kiara defended her as JJ called out from somewhere in the bus, “and she can fight!”

That didn’t stop Topper from eyeing her once more before starting the car up again. Rafe had gone up front to Topper and another male, one who barely gave her a glance.

Finally, a boy appeared from the bathroom, looking disheveled and covered in sweat. Yes, she could see it now. He did lose a bit of blood.

Another boy, she later found out his name was Pope, had laid a towel on the floor for the injured boy, John B, to lay on top of. Introductions were rapid before JJ laid the bags on the floor next to her.

Kaili had put on gloves and when she lifted his shirt, she grimaced at the sight. Someone had decided to wrap duct tape on his wound and she prayed that there was a protective layer between the tape and the injury or else there was a risk that she’d open the wound and start the bleeding all over again if it hadn’t already stopped. Muttering a round of sorry’s she was able to breathe again when she saw that there was, in fact, a cloth in between and that his wound had already begun to clot.

After advising him to eat some food and take pain relief medicine, she began cleaning out the wound, in which John B had let out a whole plethora of curse words at the girl anyway and even more so when she started suturing the cut. She hadn’t noticed the audience that she had attracted, nor that the bus had stopped again, until she had finally wrapped a flexible gauze around his middle and pulled the gloves from her hand.

Putting all of her used equipment into a plastic cup, she then handed it over to a beaming and smiling Kiara who’d thrown it away for her. Then John B was quickly taken back to the end of the bus, to a bigger bed, by a girl named Sarah who’d thanked her endlessly.

—

After a nicer round of introductions, except for one, she found out that Rafe was actually related to Sarah and that they both had another sibling in this bus who’s name is Wheezie. She tried not to laugh at that. Sarah was dating John B, who were best friends with JJ, Kiara, and Pope. Pope knew a whole lot about dead bodies and he was always reading up on the news. Then there was Topper, who was the main driver, who was also friends with Rafe and the guy who liked to keep to himself mostly. Though Kiara did mention that the guy, Kelce, isn’t usually like this but that it was hard for him to see siblings who made it out together when he didn’t. Kaili didn’t ask for her to elaborate since it wasn’t Kiara’s pain to share.

She got all of that before they asked her if she wanted to use the shower, which she jumped at the chance to. She couldn’t help but feel a little sad though, that Wei wasn’t here to experience this with her. After a quick wash, rinse, cry, and repeat. She pulled her “I heart North Carolina” over sized T-shirt over the biker shorts she took from a store and willed herself out of the bathroom. Fighting the urge to crawl into her bunk and call it a night when a group of them asked her to join them for a movie night as Kiara fixed up dinner with Topper.

She looked around this group of people, crammed into a stolen bus and she wondered who they really were, what their story was. They didn’t seem like they’d be friends outside of this situation but honestly she didn’t want to ask and they weren’t very keen in sharing, not that she’d mind because she wasn’t jumping at the chance to talk about her life before this mess either.

“Hey,” the boy who didn’t pay her a single speck of attention all day, sat across the way from her. She’d only nodded to him as a response, unable to turn her gaze back to the DVD now that his was on hers. “I’m Kelce,” he offered his hand to her and unlike earlier, she took it immediately.

“Kaili,” she'd said softly but she was sure he’d already known that, if not for Sarah saying it in between her thank you’s, then because of JJ insisting he was the one who had brought her back for his friend. Speaking of which, JJ had strutted out of the bathroom, shaking his wet hair at both of them, causing them to unlock their hands and gaze from the other. She couldn’t help but laugh at his childish antics. He had dropped to the spot next to her and extended his arm over the edge of the seat behind them as he settled in to watch the movie. Though she tried to get back into the actors on the screen, she couldn’t help but notice that Kelce’s eyes kept coming back to her, like hers did for him. It was as if he wanted to say something to her or maybe he wasn’t comfortable with her intruding into his space.

No, she definitely didn’t know what she was getting into.

tags: @rafecameron @millyelliot @tomfreakinghollandneedsaoscar @sortagaysortahigh @stfukie @kindahavefeelingskindaheartless @outerbankslut @thegreatestofheck @starlightstarkey @stargazingstarkey @anxietyandtacos @spideymyluv @pogue-writings @bedazzledbanks @pankowrudeth @bricksatanakinswindow

#kelce outer banks #kelce fic #outer banks fic #outer banks au #LIAB

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mageofholyandraste · 3 years

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OC interview: Valeria Travelyan

Thank you @oxygenforthewicked for the tag & the chance to gush about my girl <3

INTRODUCTION

1. Can you introduce yourself?

- Though it should be rather obvious by now, I’m Valeria Hamdell Travelyan, though my mother doesn’t deserve the honour of her last name being included in mine, Inquisitor of the Reformed Inquisition and Herald of our Lady Redeemer.

2. What is your gender identity, orientation and relationship status?

- I’m a woman attracted solely to men. Not that that was something viable in the Circle sometimes, but it’s what it is. And as for the relationship, how did that gossip page put it? (her brow furrows in amusement as she tries to remember.) Skyhold’s favourite Qunari mercenary isn’t romanci-bull by you.

3. Where and when were you born?

- Ostwick, 9:15 Dragon.

4. What is your weapon of choice and fighting style?

- I won’t even answer that.

5. Lastly, are you happy?

- Yes. Maker be praised, at long last, yes.

FAMILY AND FRIENDS

1. What’s your family like? What is your relationship with them?

- As far as I’m concerned, for most of them, especially mother dearest and my Templar brother, I spawned from the Fade just to torture their good family name.

2. Have you ever ran away from home?

- Home is an abstract term for me. I have run away from where people thought my home should be, though.

3. Would you consider marriage or having children?

- Seeing as I’m organising my own wedding, yes, I would consider marriage. Children, though... Imagine how loathed a half-Qunari potentially mage child would be. (she reaches for a goblet of wine with the lacking arm, only to pull back and frown slightly.) I don’t know.

4. Do you secretly hate one of your friends?

- A question back: why is this question here? Of course not.

5. Which friend knows everything about you?

- Leliana. I’m fairly certain she knows when I’ll take my next breath.

ASKED BY FANS

1. Are you literate? Have you been to school?

- I’ve spent 17 years of my life in the Circle. I’ll shit on it till I’m dead, but it’s at least given me a very good education. A deadly one too, if required. My handwriting may be a little ugly since losing an arm, but I can read and write.

2. The eeriest prediction you made that later came true?

- That the Maker isn’t done with us yet. With me. And He wasn’t.

3. What is something you were embarrassingly late to realize?

- A lot of things I don’t quite care to disclose. Being caged in a Circle doesn’t quite lend itself to learning a lot about the outside world. (her voice sounds rough and lightly annoyed. at you, circle or herself, you don’t know.)

4. Do you have mental health or physical issues?

- Obviously. (it takes her a while to answer, but you can feel the unwilling honesty in it.)

5. What is your current main goal?

- Find Solas and redeem him. Persuade him. I don’t know. I don’t want just a few more years in peace.

CHOICES

1. Drink or food?

- Both? In combination?

2. Cats or dogs?

- Neither. I don’t really like animals. Only from a distance.

3. Optimist or pessimist?

- More optimistic, I’d say.

4. Sassy or sarcastic?

- Depends on what I’m feeling like at the moment, but generally, I’m not passive-aggressive. I’m simply aggressive.

HAVE YOU EVER

1. Been caught sneaking out?

- If I had, I’d have lash marks on my back or a Tranquil mark on my forehead. But I didn’t like the risk chances of sneaking out in the Circle after a certain incident.

2. Broken a bone?

- Unfortunately. Not everything I come in contact with is friendly.

3. Received flowers?

- I don’t think so? I don’t even know what someone would give me if they’re giving flowers. That’s an idea. Bull is good at figuring out those things. Ask him.

4. Ghosted someone?

- If there’s a will, there’s a way. Letters can take months to arrive sometimes, but that’s not exactly ghosting.

5. Pretended to laugh at a joke you didn’t get?

- If you’re not funny, you’re not funny. I don’t get the need most of the time. That being said, you sometimes have to pretend to laugh at apprentice jokes. Most of them are children who don’t really deserve to not be acknowledged like that, especially as world at large will do that.

Tags:

@taliisplaying

@thatssolavellan

@ammocharis

@notebooks-and-laptops

@cetra

and anyone else interested :)

#dai #oc interview #nero.ask #tag game #dragon age inquisition #dragon age inquisitor #nero's mageverse #valeria travelyan #mage inquisitor #inquisitor travelyan #dragon age #ocs #dragon age origins #dragon age ii #dao #da2

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makomori · 4 years

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ONE | NEW TERRITORY (Brand New Story)

USHIJIMA WAKATOSHI x OC

Nishimura Yua has to take her nephew to his first rep practice with the Tohoku Tigers at Shiratorizawa Academy. Ushijima Wakatoshi is filling in for the assistant coach on said team.

She’s recovering from a nasty breakup and he’s reeling from a stunning finals loss against the Jackals.

Yua’s drawn to his composure and honesty.

Wakatoshi finds her warmth and tenacity intriguing.

It’s the start of a Brand New Story; can they heal from past hurts and endure new challenges in order to help each other trust and love again?

Length: 2.4k words

It's been nearly a month since the Schweiden Adlers lost to the MSBY Black Jackals in the V.League finals. Wakatoshi is reflecting on his performance when he receives an interesting proposal from his old coach.

Much love to @chuckhansen for encouraging my chicken little ass to post this. After 24601 years, I finally finished a chapter! And it’s about your favourite opposite lefty, Ushijima Wakatoshi! I absolutely ADORE him, and I’ve been running with this idea since March. The title is from Exile Generation’s song, “Brand New Story”. I highly recommend checking it out b/c it’s an amazing BOP.

This is eventually going to be a multi-chapter, Ushiwaka x OC fic b/c our Super Ace deserves all the love in the world! This is definitely a rough draft, and I welcome constructive feedback or any reactions! I’m catching up with the manga, so I’ll be making changes along the way. I hope you enjoy reading b/c I had so much fun writing it. 🥰🥺

Wakatoshi’s morning jog was hard. Physically, he could have easily run for another ten kilometers, but his mind kept pulling him back to the safety and warmth of his unmade bed. Annoyed that a steady and peaceful rhythm was out of his reach, he grudgingly circled back to his complex. But by the time he made it up the steps to his apartment, he was breathing hard.

Looks like he needed more rest after all.

Before going in, Wakatoshi took note of the nearly empty bowls of kibble and water beside his front door. He needed to refill them soon. There were several stray cats in the neighbourhood, and he always tried to feed as many as he could while he was home. They gravitated to him when he first moved in, which he thought odd because he didn’t have any experience with cats, or any animals, as a child. He enjoyed their company, though, as they were independent and showed affection once a bond was formed. He wasn’t the easiest person to interact with, so he appreciated the simplicity of his relationship with them.

Sighing, he unzipped his sweater and tossed it absently on the dark green counter top. The apartment was bigger than initially wanted, but his mother insisted that he’d regret it if he chose something smaller. She said that it was always good to have extra room in case people came over. He wanted to tell her that he wouldn’t have much time to entertain considering he would be on the road for games. However, when he realized the extra space would mean that she would always be comfortable during visits, he quickly put an offer in for the apartment.

The troublesome feeling of guilt tugged at him as he thought of his mother. He hadn’t spoken to her in a few weeks. Not since the Adlers loss to the Jackals in the V.League finals. Actually, he needed to touch base with several people in addition to her. Leaning against the counter, he thumbed through his phone until his messages popped up.

20 unread texts stared at him earnestly. The latest one was from Kageyama.

We should practice soon. Let me know when you’re free.

No apologies or words of comfort. He appreciated that. It seemed that Kageyama had already cut his losses and was getting ready for next season. He only knew of a few people that bounced back that quickly; Kageyama’s stubbornness and adaptability was an invaluable asset on the court.

The next message was from Romero.

Hey, Lefty. Drinks on me next time.

Wakatoshi wasn’t a huge drinker, but he enjoyed spending time with Romero. He was supportive and sociable, traits that he hoped would come easier to him one day.

Tendou was next.

Don’t get too down, Toshi-kun! I’ll buy you all the Hayashi rice you want the next time I’m in Sendai.

That made him chuckle. Tendou must be really worried about him if he was willing to take a break from his chocolatier apprenticeship just go out for dinner in their hometown.

The rest of the messages were of a similar nature. Sympathies and offers to hang out when he was available. People were genuinely concerned for him, and he was grateful. He hoped he didn’t worry his them too much with his lack of response.

Normally, he responded to any messages immediately, but he wanted a bit of peace after a long season. A month, however, was pushing it. After downing a glass of orange juice, he decided to respond to them methodically after a short nap and a hot shower. He flopped ungracefully on the couch and stretched his long legs out, calves protesting slightly at the movement.

Wakatoshi closed his eyes and hoped sleep would come, but his thoughts were pulled back to the final set against the Jackals. Everyone knew the match would be a close one. The players on both teams were talented, competitive, and exceedingly stubborn. The Adlers had been the champions for the last three years, but the Jackals were eager to claim that title for themselves. Once the team found out who their opponents were, they prepared to play hard through all five sets.

Because the Jackals would do the same.

Wakatoshi was more than excited for the match, as he always relished the chance to play the best of his contemporaries. He was especially looking forward to paying Hinata back for snatching his last chance to go to the Spring Tournament seven years ago. Wakatoshi couldn’t wait to test the redhead’s newfound skills against his own. They had both evolved into formidable players since their last encounter.

But the Jackals still surprised him, despite having played them twice during the regular season. He had spent hours analyzing their strengths, weaknesses, and overall playing style. The Adlers were deadly in their precision and technical prowess, but the Jackals matched that with their unpredictability and tenacity. Miya’s charisma leant itself well to his unconventional spikers. Bokuto, Sakusa, and Hinata were the personification of baseless confidence and relentless determination. Wakatoshi’s most disliked traits.

The Adlers won the first two sets: 25-22 and 25-23.

The coaching staff was fairly confident that they team would take the final set and the match itself, with his, Houshiumi’s, and Romero’s spikes at textbook perfection. But Wakatoshi knew better. From across the court, he felt the energy shift in the Jackals’ team huddle. He could tell Hinata was rallying his team with some choice words; Bokuto was getting worked up, along with Sakusa. They weren’t going out quietly, and frankly, Wakatoshi would’ve been disappointed if they didn’t put up a fight.

The Jackals took the next two sets: 28-26 and 25-23.

Like most players Wakatoshi didn’t like being pushed to the fifth set, as switching courts halfway could effectively kill any hard-earned momentum. He scored the first few points of the set, connecting with Kageyama’s tosses like he always did. But a feeling a dread crept to the front of his mind once he felt that shift of energy again.

It started with Hinata and quickly spread to the rest of his team. The time he spent with Oikawa in Brazil had changed him. He was faster, smarter, and even more fearless than the first time they played. Wakatoshi had to stop himself from admiring his skill and presence. Miya had a grin on his face every time he set to the redhead. Few setters had the chance to work with a wing spiker like Hinata.

The Jackals disrupted the flow of the game with two hard volleys to the back corners of the court on the second hit. The placement confused the back-line players because the ball’s trajectory was on that razor-thin line of in and out. Indecision cost them two crucial points. Then, Sakusa forced him to dig for a few a tips that were just outside of his reach.

And shockingly, he was forced to tip when he realized that he couldn’t power his way through an impenetrable three-man block. It was sloppy and picked up with ease by the libero. This was new territory for him, and he normally wouldn’t have minded, but the unforgiving pace of the fifth set didn’t allow him enough time to adjust to their tactics.

The Jackals won the final set. 25-23. Hinata’s final kill blasted through a hole through his, Sokolov’s, and Romero’s outstretched arms.

Wakatoshi had never been one to dwell on the past, but he couldn’t help but remember his final loss against Karasuno seven years ago. He looked over at Hinata, who was currently dog-piled under his teammates and coaching staff. Their celebration was drowned out by the roaring and unruly crowd, shocked at the defeat of the defending champions.

The little redhead managed to best him again.

No. He was the Little Giant now.

Wakatoshi was still recovering from the outcome when Romero gently nudged his shoulder and said it was time to line up. The man’s darkly stubbled face was sweaty and flushed, probably not unlike his own. But he gave him a solid thump on his back and complimented his spikes before walking past, and it was all Wakatoshi could do to hold his head up high and line up with the rest of the team.

That was a month ago, he thought angrily, resting his forearm over his eyes. The pressure was somewhat comforting. Move on. He hated that he was still dwelling on this loss. That wasn’t like him. He felt out of place for the last month, unsure of how to process his feelings. He hated that even more. Why? He was already a champion, so why was this loss different? Was it because he failed in his duty as the Adlers’ Ace?

Or was it because Hinata beat him again?

His last coherent thought before he finally drifted off to sleep was a fierce promise that he would continue to push forward and improve.

No matter what stood in his way.

Riiiiing. Riiiiing. Riiiiing. Riiiiiii—

Wakatoshi turned over, causing the phone on his chest to fall face down onto the floor. The loud thud brought him back to reality. He rubbed his eyes gently with the heel of his hand. How long had he slept? And who was calling him? He briefly considered ignoring the call, but then remembered his decision to reach out to people again. Might as well start now. But by the time he reached his phone, the ringing had stopped. His brow furrowed when he saw the name pop up for the missed call.

SAITOU-SENSEI.

Curious, Wakatoshi sat up and pressed the call button.

“Hello?”

“Saitou-sensei, it’s Wakatoshi-kun. I’m sorry I missed your call.” He smiled when the warm, familiar voice echoed in his ear.

“Oh, not to worry! I’m sure you wanted some peace and quiet after a busy season.”

“Yes,” he stated, leaning back on the plush cushions. “It’s good to be home.”

The excitement in his coach’s voice was instant. “Ah, I was hoping you’d say that! I know it’s last minute, but would you be interested in helping me coach a middle school rep team on Saturday?”

“Coach?” He echoed. Saturday was two days away.

“Just for this Saturday,” his sensei clarified. “My assistant is sick and having an extra pair of hands at practice is never a bad thing.”

Wakatoshi nodded in agreement. Having two coaches was always a benefit to the players. He learned as much from Saitou-sensei as he did Washijiou-sensei during his time at Shiratorizawa. “Where are you holding practice?”

He could hear the smile in sensei’s voice. “Home court. Shiratorizawa Academy. It’s from 1 to 4 in the afternoon.”

Wakatoshi’s eyes widened. He was going to already going to say yes because it was Saitou-sensei asking, but that solidified his decision. “If it’s acceptable, I’d like to be there at 11 to warm up. I haven’t played in a month.” He paused and tried to think of another way to help. “I can set the net up as well.”

“That would be great because I don’t have a manager yet.” Sensei sounded relieved. “I was planning on coming early and doing it myself, but I’m in Tokyo until Saturday morning.”

Wakatoshi shook his head. It wouldn’t take long for sensei’s young team to realize how lucky they were to have him as a coach. He was always willing to do everything to ensure everyone would have a good experience. “Please leave it to me.”

“You’re still reliable as ever, Wakatoshi-kun. I’ll take you out for dinner as a thank you.”

Wakatoshi’s ears grew hot. He never expected anything in return for helping. “T-that’s not necessary, sensei,” he murmured, rubbing the back of his neck. “This is the least I can do for the years you spent coaching me.”

“Ah, now you’re embarrassing me!” Sensei’s laugh was infectious. “It was a joy to help you grow into the player you are now. You played a hell of a game last month.”

Wakatoshi’s fingers tightened over his phone. Did he really play his absolute best? If he did, it still wasn’t enough to win against Hinata and—

“Don’t be too hard on yourself.”

Sensei’s steady voice effectively cut through Wakatoshi’s negative thoughts and insecurities. “I know you hate losing.” The smile returned to his tone. “But when you do, there’s no shame in losing to the best of them. It just happened to be the Jackals that day.”

Wakatoshi swallowed the lump forming in his throat. He didn’t realize how much he needed to be reassured that losing didn’t mean he was inadequate or lacking. He was just used to shouldering the burdens and pressure that came with being a top player. Not to mention the high expectations he set for himself. But that left no room for failure, and it was exhausting.

“Besides, you love playing more than you hate losing, right?” His sensei sounded hopeful, imploring. “I’m sure you’ll feel better once you get back on the court.”

Wakatoshi’s eyes widened. His love for volleyball was lost in the wake of self-pity. Suddenly, Saturday couldn’t come fast enough. He missed practicing until his arms and hands were red. He missed the satisfaction of hearing the ball land in the opponent’s court after a spike or a tip. And he missed growing and learning with his teammates.

“I-I’m looking forward to it,” Wakatoshi said softly. “Thank you, Saitou-sensei.” He still wasn’t the best at expressing his feelings, but he knew that sensei understood him enough to understand that he was grateful for the words of encouragement.

“Hey, now! You’re a coach now too, Ushijima-sensei. Get used to it. You’ll be hearing it a lot from the players on Saturday.”

Wakatoshi frowned. He was only filling in and didn’t deserve that distinction. “But it’s only for the day—”

His sensei laughed again. “Well, that still counts! I’ll see you on Saturday.”

“Goodbye, sensei.”

Wakatoshi placed his phone on the coffee table. The heaviness he felt in his chest throughout the last month was gone. Instead, he felt restless. Just like all the other times he took on a new challenge. It had been a long time since he trained anyone. Perhaps he could show these young players that falling short of a goal wasn’t the end of the world. And having a solid support system was essential to growing as an individual and as a player. After embracing his newfound insights, a smile threatened split his face in two.

He was definitely getting into it.

#mywriting #ushijima wakatoshi #wakatoshi ushijima #ushiwaka #ushijima x oc #ushiwaka x oc #hqfic #hqfics #ushijima fics #ushiwaka fics #userairika #ALSO I CAN'T BELIEVE HQ IS OVER #I'M WRITING THIS FIC TO COPE HAHAHA #wakatoshi x oc #chuckhansen

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rachelbethhines · 4 years

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Tangled Salt Marathon - The Way of the Willow

Now here’s a controversial episode from season one. Let’s delve into the discourse, shall we.

Summary: It's Queen Arianna's birthday, and she receives an unexpected guest: her estranged sister, Willow. Willow and Rapunzel quickly bond, sharing a lot of the same personality traits (most notably them never wearing shoes), and Arianna feels a bit left out. To add to her aggravation, Willow has given her a pet with an annoying rattle. Eventually, Arianna explodes at her sister, letting her know her irritation with her and throws away the rattle. The pet starts to multiply and rampage over the countryside. Meanwhile, Lance and Eugene take the King camping.

More Filler, More Poor Pacing, More Fatigue

This is yet another episode that was moved around. Noticing a pattern yet? It doesn’t effect the plot much, but it kills the pacing dead. By the time you get to this episode you’re just tired and bored and ready for the show to just get on with things.

Let's Talk About Representation

So we have here a show that is marketed towards pre-teen little girls run by two middle aged white guys and written primarily by men. The creators have claimed that female relationships are the focus of the show, but only to give us one female friend for our main hero, no other friendships with women in them, just two sister relationships, and only one mother that is even alive.

Furthermore they go on to break up that single female friendship, refuse to give any focus to the only mother in the show, and then wrap the plot around the dead abusive mom instead, making her unnecessarily even more horrible than she was in the OG film. (just to make the equally abusive father in the show look better)

Meanwhile we get four father figures, all of whom are just some variant on the ‘overprotective estranged dad’ trope. Even though at least two of them could have been easily written to be mothers instead and it’d not change the plot one bit.

When women talk about about poor representation in media, it’s things like this we are often complaining about. That’s not to say that men can’t write women. Miyazaki, of Studio Ghibli fame, has made a lifelong career out writing movies for and starring women. Nor is this a claim that the TTS crew are misogynist. You can be well intentioned and still screw up. As is most often the case in films.

But nevertheless, if you are writing for a demographic that you are not a part of then you need to either include those voices in the development of your story or reach out and consult people within that demographic. And no, you’re wife/niece/daughter/mother does not count here. You need to go beyond your personal social circle, as people who either don’t know you or have worked in the industry can be more open about what is needed in the writing process.

Sadly there are rumors, (and please keep in mind this is only rumor, and we’ll never know the actual truth due to the fact that production artists are under contract and can’t share things without fearing for their livelihoods) but there are stories of the head showrunner shutting down the opinions of the female storyboard artists who warned him of some these creative decisions.

Moreover said creator responded to criticisms of how his female characters were written by claiming he ‘knew strong women in his life’ as if that actually had anything to do with his writing skills. It’s a poor response and smacks of ‘Well I can’t be misogynistic, I love women. See, I married one’. Dear, male creators, please don't ever do this. It makes you look bad.

So Where are Arianna and Willow From, Again?

The show keeps dropping hints that they’re from Corona itself and are born princesses, but that makes little sense. Because if Arianna was the rightful heir she’d have far more political power then she actually does in the show. If we’re to buy the idea that only Rapunzel will be in charge, and not her and Eugene, or even just Eugene. Then we have to accept that it’s because she’s the rightful heir by birth. If so, then Frederic must also be the blood heir or otherwise he wouldn’t be able to do all the things he does in the show.

TTS is so determine to not have any real world markers in the show and keeping things a ‘fantasy’ that it winds up swinging too far in the opposite direction. To the point that it undermines its own worldbuilding.

The Conflict Between Willow and Arianna is Good, but Unnecessary

I’ve seen some debate over ‘who is right’ here, along with tons of unwarranted shade thrown at Willow, but the truth is, it doesn’t matter. Neither side is right or wrong, and for once the conflict in TTS is real, complex, not easily solvable with a ten minute conversation, and is presented evenly so that you know where each side is coming from. But in the end, it doesn’t add anything to the series.

Willow is never seen outside of this episode. This is the only story that gives Arianna any kind of focus. Rapunzel learns nothing useful from witnessing their squabbles and it’s all build up to a be bad parable/parallel in the series finale.

It’s a waste. A waste of conflict. A waste of character. A waste of time.

Had Arianna been treated as an important character to the narrative, like she should have been, then maybe the episode would have fared better.

Arianna is Reduced to a Pointless Parallel

We talked about it before but this might be the most grievous example of Tangled’s useless parallels.

Willow and Arianna are meant to be ‘foreshadowing’ (and I use that term loosely) for Rapunzel and Cassandra’s conflict in the finale season. Let me count the ways of how bad this actually is..

For starters Willows and Arianna’s conflit isn’t actually the same as Raps and Cass. There’s some overlap, but ultimately theirs is actually deeper and more complex than the Raps vs Cass stuff. It’s also only between them and does not involve ruining the lives of other people. So it’s a weak comparison to begin with.

Cassandra isn’t even here to make the parallel complete. She barely interacts with Arianna and has never met Willow on screen.

Rapunzel learns the wrong lessons from this. She gets encouragement from her aunt to go traveling and a pep talk from her mom during the show’s finale, but she doesn’t actually apply any of the actual context of the arguments being made to her own life. Making the parallel shallow.

Reducing a character from the original film, one that you did not create and who has reasons to be have more plot importance then they are given, to a mere ‘parallel’ for your favorite OC is just bad fanfiction. This is something that I would expect from a seven year old setting out to write their first ever story. Not from grown adults, who are supposedly professionals, who've worked for years in the industry and are employed by the largest entertainment studio in the world.

Now before you jump down my throat, there’s nothing wrong with fanfiction itself, nor with children exploring their favorite stories in ways they find personally fulfilling. But I happen to hold mass produced media to a different, and ultimately higher standard. As well should we all. A television show made by the mouse has more real world impact than a little girl posting on Ao3.

Critiquing stuff like female representation, the behind the scenes hiring processes that leads to either good or bad rep, and the impression these stories can have on people still developing their worldviews is important. Questioning things are needed in order to make change happen. If you never acknowledge how giving a show targeted to women to a male showrunner can cause problems then you’re never going to push the big companies for more female lead shows. Which means more women are left without work.

This is Subjective but...

I don’t like the Uumlaut being used as the main conflict. Look, if you like the Gremlins references, good for you, but I was promised sword fights and adventure according to the pilot and all I got was a parody of a 80s horror comedy that decided to skip out on the ‘horror’ part. The Uumlaut isn’t threatening enough to be interesting and the lack of real threats and challenges in this show is really starting to weigh things down. Plus it just distracts from the far more interesting human drama going on with Willow and Arianna.

Like if you don't want action to be the focus of every episode, that’s fine, but commit to that. Don't just half-ass it because you feel the need to shoehorn in an action sequence where it isn’t needed.

Conclusion

I like Willow as a character, but not this episode. They needed to do more with her to justify her existence, and they needed to do more with Arianna while at it. Sadly, you won't really miss out on much if you decided to skip this episode and that’s a shame.

Also...

I’ll forever headcanon that Willow is the wife that Stan mentioned back in Rapunzel’s Enemy and that she’s his and Pete’s beard. You can’t change my mind. Poly relationships for the win!

#tangled #anti-tangled #willow #arianna #repersentation #critique #tangled the series #rapunzel's tangled adventure #tts #rta

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ddaenghoney · 5 years

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chapter four

masterlist link in blog description.

As a successful songwriter, you want nothing more than the acknowledgment that the chart-topping musical pieces are your own creations. But contracts, relationships, and the difficulty of facing the stakes involved head on, keep your mouth shut until pressure builds too much.

Pairing(s): Park Jimin x Y/N, Min Yoongi x Y/N

disclaimer: any characters depicted do not represent the actual personality of the respected idol in real life.

Series warning(s)/genre(s): Chapter-based written fic, Slow-burn relationship(s), Fake-dating, Unrequited love, Songwriter/producer!oc, idol!Jimin, idol/songwriter/producer!Yoongi, friends with benefits, drama, romance, smut, angst, fluff (updated as needed)

Chapter warning(s): graphic sexual depictions (fingering, like really minor dirty talk; it’s mostly dirty praise idk, oral; female receiving, cum swallowing, vaginal penetration via male penis(typing this made me laugh so hard lmao), male ejaculation without condom); i’d say it’s entirely sweet sex but uh-

Word count: 4931

if you enjoy please, please let me know!

Yoongi stands outside of the CEO office, his back against the wall beside the elevator. Waiting until the door shuts behind you, he straightens, pressing the button next to his waist to signal the elevator. Meeting eyes with his, you know there’s a lot he wants to say, but the vagueness of his expression doesn’t give you an idea of a tone. Another lecture you’re sure. Just to continue the growing streak. Yerin’s secretary glances towards you then Yoongi, curiosity taking over her to hope for something interesting to occur.

You simply follow him into the elevator.

“What was all of that?” He asks you when the door shuts, eyes peering in frustration, but you believe him to be shocked more than anything. “I’m now your fake boyfriend?” A single, breathy laugh leaves his mouth. Bitter.

“I guess,” You’re unable to meet his gaze, instead staring at the unlit elevator buttons and the lack of movement from other people calling for the elevator on this oddly slow day. “I don’t even know.”

“If I knew this would happen,” He sighs, rubbing his temples and never finishing the end of the thought. Leaving it to himself.

“This is my fault.” Your voice is barely a whisper, severity of everything catching up with you and how you’ve managed to cause trouble for Jimin and now Yoongi, who’s new to SoundWave and probably hating the employment.

“No.” Yoongi shakes his head, then exhales once more, trying to rationalize. “This is complete shit, but it’s not your fault.” In the first place, Jimin having a contract forbidding him from dating is one that Yoongi thought was just a bad rumor in the industry-- something that people didn’t actually have. There wasn’t a single employee in his last company that was forced under that rule, even though it had been frowned upon to be in public relationships. Incredibly frowned upon in a certain case. Still, Yoongi never figured the lack of a dating-ban clause in his contract and the new direction of his stage persona would lead him into a fake relationship. Irony with no humor. “Why aren’t you publically an employee?”

You reach for the elevator buttons, clicking the ground floor. The machinery shifts, starting the descent.

“Because,” You’re still hesitant about the prospect of explaining your situation. Anyone at SoundWave that has anything to do with music production knows, and Yoongi shouldn’t be an exception. It’s not like he is an intern, or part-time assistant. You may even work with him in the future, but you can’t remember ever explaining your position to someone other than Jimin. And that was only because he was whom you worked with often when first starting. “I write songs and produce, but I don’t ever get credited for it.”

“What?” Yoongi sounds like he thinks he didn’t correctly hear you. “Wait, what do you mean? Who gets the credit then?”

You sigh, eyeing the floor number that grows smaller and smaller, but not quick enough. “Whatever group or idol that ends up using them.”

“You,” He’s without comprehension, expression on his face ridiculously confused. Maybe even appalled by your job, or that he is also a part of the extremely large group under the assumption that they aren’t being lied to. Only to find out that it’s an acceptable and ongoing aspect of the company. One you’re acceptant of; otherwise you would’ve quit years ago or never taken the job to begin with. “You let your work get used under someone else’s name-- you’re lying to people, and you’re just letting that happen?”

You glare at him, but stay silent. Even if you want to argue, that’s how it is. You don’t have the power to change it, and years earlier you didn’t actually mind sliding ethics aside. You want to tell him that you’re not letting the lies occur willingly, but by the looks of his face-- something appearing increasingly unsettled and distant about your untruthful position-- you know it won’t matter. He won’t understand and maybe is even right to have his opinion of you drop to the ground.

The elevator door opens prompting you to practically jump out. “I’m going home.”

Yoongi stays inside of it, posture weighted in contempt of everything that he’s just gone through. As if the merger couldn’t get anymore terrible, now he is in a falsified relationship with someone that helps SoundWave lie to the general public just for the sake of appearances, and he’s stuck dealing with it. He groans when the doors shut again, taking a moment to bask in the nonsense of it all before clicking the button to his studio’s floor.

Outside the building you pace, considering the option of calling Jimin, but then also considering that he hasn’t texted you and is likely angry and sorting through his own thoughts of this mess. You groan, startling a passerby on their walk to wherever. Taking no notice you shake your head, pulling out your phone and ripping the bandaid off,

Y/N, 3:43pm: Can we talk?

You stare at the message thread for a passing minute, then lock the screen. He could be busy doing a thousand other things, there isn’t a reason for him to automatically get back to your message, and he could still be upset-- the screen flashes with a notification, and you immediately unlock,

Jimin, 3:44pm: Yeah, I get off close to nine.

A breath releases from your lips. At least he responded. Another message appears, the contents seizing up the next beat of your heart.

Jimin, 3:44pm: Can I call you right now?

Y/N, 3:45pm: Yeah, of course.

You descend south of the company, heading towards a nearby coffee shop when the call comes in. “Hello?”

“Hey,” Jimin sits in the recording booth, waiting for the producer to meet him there at the start of the next hour. His legs gently push on the floor, swaying the computer chair side to side. “Are you okay?”

“Yeah,” The concern in his voice eases you, as well as the seemingly calm demeanor. Though there is a chance he’s feigning it, you suppose. “I’m so sorry about the thing with Yoongi. I swear nothing happened-”

“I believe you, lovely.” Softly spoken, head nodding even though you couldn’t see him. Jimin bites his lip, bothered that you’ve likely been incredibly worried about what he thought ever since Yerin dropped the words. “You wouldn’t do that to me. I trust you.”

His sincerity is warm, nearly causing the fuzz of emotions in your eyes to trickle because of how much your mind was pressured from the idea that he would misunderstand. You breathe through your lips, cracking the air audibly. Jimin sits upright on his end, concern raising his voice’s volume,

“Baby, are you crying?”

“No.” You’re quick to cover up but the word itself sounds like a tremble. Jimin frowns, rubbing his face,

“I’m sorry, I would’ve texted you but I was worried your phone’s notification would be loud while you were talking to Yerin. I didn’t want it to interrupt and make her angrier.” You rub your eyes feeling no tears and just the annoying heat that seems to release from all of the stress of the past couple of hours. “What did she tell you anyways? You didn’t get in more trouble did you?”

“No, it’s nothing.” Just a speech that put you in your place, but it’s not worth mentioning. “I’m sorry I didn’t answer you over the weekend, Jimin.”

“It’s fine.” Jimin taps his index finger on the armrest, then pausing the motion as you speak up,

“No, it’s not fine. I shouldn’t have ignored you. I wasn’t being fair.” You sigh. He’s quiet at your words, surprised at the conclusion of your actions.

“I was acting like an idiot, Y/N.” He glances to the clock, knowing the producer is usually early. “I’m not mad at you for it, I deserved it. Anyways, I need to go. I just called because I wanted to hear your voice and make sure you were okay.” You smile softly at the admission. “Come to my apartment later and we’ll talk more, alright?”

“Okay,” You nod, glancing to the sign on the coffee shop that stated they are closed for the day. Unusual for a Monday. Yet fitting for the kind of day it is. “I’ll make sure no one notices me going in.”

---

Jimin can’t help chuckling at you when he opens his front door. A large zip-up hoodie drapes over you with the hood covering your face, and sunglasses complete your, to your opinion, lowkey look despite sunglasses being useless at night. You’re pouting as you remove the shades, stepping into the apartment.

“I bet the cab driver thought you were having a day.”

“He wouldn’t be wrong.” You shrug, slipping the hood off and dipping your eyes from his. Jimin sighs, head nodding in agreement. “He was telling me I was lucky to get a cab tonight and everyone is close to the city center today, so at least I got a ride if nothing else.” Jimin’s head tilts at your seemingly lack of awareness to the date,

“You know it’s New Year’s Eve don’t you?” His sentence barely completes before you’re looking back at him in shock. When you consider all of the closed establishments and lack of people at work, it makes sense, but you’re in disbelief that you forgot. Jimin smiles in endearment, reaching for your hand, “It’s been a complicated week.”

He leads you to the couch, and still calm. With all of the information he heard from Yerin, you assumed Jimin would act differently. At least be asking fervently for answers. He said on the phone that he trusts you, but despite that you wonder how he’s not appearing to be upset about it. Sitting down beside him, you watch Jimin pull his knee up on the cushion facing you. His hand fiddles with yours, thumb stroking the top.

“What should we do?”

The question isn’t one you anticipated on your way over. The diverse amount of things Jimin could mean with it flutter your mind like gusts in a tree, and the lack of strong emotion in how he spoke make your eyebrows harden in thought. “What do you mean?”

“You know,” His eyes fall to where your hands meet. Jimin squeezes tighter. A pound in his chest. “Don’t you think we should stop this all?”

Muscles tense throughout your body. The concept is so far removed from what you expected. His passive attitude to go along with it drives your head to draw a blank. You thought coming here there could be strong words in an argument of explanations, and apologies for the things Yerin called you both into the office for. Not this. Your hand squeezes around his and Jimin casts his gaze back up. Nervousness is apparent, paired with your head shaking.

Jimin bites his inner lip, trying to remain rational despite the hurt in your eyes, “We,” He hesitates, remembering the first time that he kissed you. “We’re just hurting each other, love.”

“How?” Voice higher, confused. “We’re,” You swallow dryly, “Not even dating, Jimin, why do you sound like you think we should break up.” A tiny, hollow laugh, devoid of humor. You watch helplessly as he nods,

“I know, so before it gets worse than what happened today, we should stop.” Jimin’s voice slows down, like he doesn’t want to complete the sentence. Sadder. You inhale, trying to reason his tactics in your mind,

“Then let’s date.”

“Love-”

“I don’t want to stop.” Jimin bites his lip, frowning at you while feeling the ducts of his eyes well because of your pleas. Your hand shakes in his grip, and he wills himself to stop from hugging you. “Please, I don’t want to stop. I like how we were, I,” You remember saying the opposite to him at the club. He recalls the same thing, smiling joylessly.

“We can’t stand up for each other, baby. I can’t be there for you like you deserve.” Jimin talks about the company, but also in society’s perspective. Yerin made it clear that he can’t be in a relationship publically, and for that reason the relationship between you started. Hidden. Incomplete. Jimin told you at the beginning that you should both stop if you caught feelings for somebody else and you agreed because it was just fun when it started. It wasn’t serious, but it turned into something deeper. You know that and know Jimin knows it too.

“I care about you so much.”

Jimin’s lips part at the simple, yet utterly sincere and loving words. Contrasted by the sadness of the entire situation. His hand clenches around yours. He thinks the same, but with what he knows about himself, he shouldn’t let this continue. The few cool tears dripping from his eyes plead with him as well. To admit to you the feelings that he has, but it’s more complicated.

“Jimin,” He loves hearing his name through your lips. His tear-stained face watches you move, knowing he should stop you. He doesn’t want to. He doesn’t and your lips are on his. Jimin’s hand abandons yours for your waist, to keep you from getting too close, but he kisses you back, relishing in your touch against his better judgement.

“Baby.” Jimin’s hand tightens around the side of your waist when you attempt to move closer. Mere inches from your face, his eyes lock with yours, searching for your thoughts.

“Please,” Air hitches in Jimin’s throat while your arms cascade around his neck. Your voice soft. Begging once more, by your lips kissing him sweetly. Like candy. Familiarly. “You don’t want to stop.”

“We should though.” A waver in his tone. Jimin really doesn’t want to stop, let you go, force you from his life.

“Just kiss me.” Believing you can convince him otherwise, your arms gently tug. Coaxing. In a more sensible time, you know this isn’t how to keep him with you. You know that there are problems, and the way Jimin and you are now won’t work. But you love him.

And this isn’t a sensible time.

Your hoodie is left on the couch, stripped off before Jimin lifts you to take you to his bedroom. Your lips attach along his jaw, trailing until you come in contact with the spot that elicits an expected grunt. Your arms tighten around him, holding yourself to him while working at the skin, leaving it sensitive and bruised before he lays you down.

His fingers caress on the area, smirking softly at your quick, thorough work, but his jaw tightens when you waste no time and remove your long sleeve. Inhaling a long breath, Jimin crawls over top of you,pressing your head back into the mattress as he kisses you firmly.

“What if you regret this?” Jimin’s voice blisters against your neck, syllables left in the skin like a trail leading to your collarbone where he pauses, kissing feverishly. He knows you won’t change your mind, more so when you audibly sigh and mix your fingertips into his hair,

“I can’t regret you.” You raise your hips the short distance to rub against Jimin’s, listening to his groan when he feels you against his growing bulge, “I want you, Jimin.”

For more than just the night.

Jimin’s face equals with your own, lost in your eyes until you kiss him again, prompting him to flatten against you more. His hips rub slowly over yours, firmly pressing his hardened erection against your pelvis. You moan against his lips, fueling Jimin’s emotions to win over logic. His hand reaches for the button on your jeans quickly, desiring more contact. He halts when you nudge him upwards, immediately thinking you want to stop until your fingertips are undoing each button on his top. He smirks at your hands, watching you through the sultriness in his irises.

Jimin lets you be the one to push his shirt off his shoulders, then he lets it slip off his arms to lie next to your hips on the bed. Your palm finds his chest, cementing the beat of his heart to memory. He observes quietly, curious of the slowness in your actions. The intimacy of feeling his skin in a calm manner. The moment passes when your hand moves to cup his cheek, guiding him back down to you for a kiss labored in passion, but just as vulnerable as tears.

You grind your hips opposite of his motions, creating a deeper pressure that causes a small piece of profanity to fall from his lips. Jimin’s hand finds your cleavage, squeezing over your bra to make you gasp. The article is removed then in your haste for him to touch you more, earning darkened chuckles from his lips when you lift your back from the bed to unclasp the bra, your chest pressing to his. He admires you, “You’re so precious.”

“Then don’t break up with me.” Labored words escape when you’re back against his sheets. Under his focused stare you slip your arms from the bra straps, but hesitate to remove the cups when Jimin’s chest fills with air from a sharp inhale. Watching so intently, and you swear his eyes gaze lovingly as well. He reaches his hand over yours, guiding it to slide the lingerie from your chest, exposing yourself to him for a countless time. Beautiful.

“It’s better for us,” Jimin has the nerve, the stubbornness to say this in a low voice, despite the fact that the actions currently show he’s trapped in the thing he’s deemed no good. You shake your head, then are halted by the ghosting kiss from his lips, “You mean so much to me, lovely.” A longer ministration follows, filling your thoughts of the familiarity how sweet he’s always tasted. “But we can’t become a couple. I can’t let you deal with how lousy I am.”

“You’re not,” You pepper Jimin’s cheeks, fingers trailing along his back.

“You know how I am in the company.” You don’t speak against that idea, the one you never want to bring up because it felt like an instant argument. One you didn’t think Jimin realized. “And you’re wonderful and talented,” His kisses are short and repetitive against your lips, “And deserve better than all of the crap you’re put through. But I can’t help you with it. And I don’t want to be a reason you hold yourself back.”

Before you’re able to retort at his nonsensical words, Jimin’s hand reaches between your legs palm pressing against your jeans and rubbing friction into your core. Words are lost to a whimper unprepared for the contact as well as the proceeding action his hand takes rubbing roughly, making your hips move into him craving more. Jimin kisses at your neck listening to his name fall from your lips in a needy murmur.

His hand leaves your growing pile of nerves, eliciting a breathy whine that he kisses back into your mouth. Jimin unbuttons your jeans, “Take them off.” The demanding tone is contrastingly soft, leaving your heart beating in anticipation and complying in moments to help him rid the clothing. “God,” He lifts himself upright, knees pressing further into the mattress from his weight, while he looks you over: skin already appearing glistened from need, chest concaving from breaths that leave the mess of lovebites in view on your upper body. “So beautiful.” His head tilts watching the blush on your face grow from his words. “You know that though,” A coy smirk plays at his lips, while he reaches for your thighs, gently sliding you upwards on his bed, so your head comes close to the headboard. “I tell you,” Your mouth releases a moan when his fingers press against your clit through your panties, his lips leaving airy pecks on your thighs, “Every time I can,” His smirks grows when the swipe of his thumb against your wettening heat makes your legs jerk. Trying to close, but he removes the hand to grip them back in place, respreading, “I’m going to make you feel good.”

Profanity slips from your lips in a breathless stutter when he strips you completely, Jimin’s fingers rubbing into your clit like a map memorized. Easily causing your legs to wiggle, moans slipping out when one dips inside. “Jimin,” Needily begging for more as the digit slides in and out, readying you for the second while he continues laying kisses on your chest, decorating it with heat in every spot. “Feels-” You gasp when his thumb works against your clit, the sensation mixing with his fingers pumping inside of you making your hands grip his shoulder.

Nails graze the skin as Jimin’s fingers push all the way, he grunts from the force of your hand, but leaves a kiss to your jaw, “Don’t come,” Another ministration on your lips as you whimper, already knowing you were leaving his fingers wet along with his sheets from how he was expertly edging you along, “Not yet, lovely, wait for my mouth to take you over.”

Every piece of will to listen nearly disperts from just the tone of Jimin’s voice: slow, confident. You’re so willing to be pushed over that you’re unable to stop your hips bucking into his mouth when his tongue graces the entrance of your throbbing cunt. He chuckles against you, the vibrations themselves feel good, and your face heats from your own eagerness, but you’re more focused on giving him the satisfaction he wants, “Jimin, you’re so-” You gasp as his tongue dips deeper, moaning your next words, “Good, fuck; please, I want to come.”

“Let me taste you, baby,” Jimin’s hands hold your hips as you writhe from the pleasuring sensations. He groans low when your hand leaves the bed to tangle in his hair as your orgasm coaxes through. You tremble releasing yourself with long moans, hazy while Jimin’s lips lap up your arousal, muttering praise into your core. Your head lies against his mattress, chest taking full inhales, as Jimin sits upright. His tongue drags along the remainders of you on his lips, while his eyes take in your fucked body. He crawls overtop of you, kissing you and staining your tongue with your own taste.

“I want you inside me,” You cup Jimin’s face as you murmur the words. His eyes are lidden with desire at your statement, sharply inhaling when you go on, “Fuck me, baby, please I want to make you cum in me.” Jimin kisses you, moaning to your lips as your hand rubs his shaft through tight jeans. “It’s not even fair for you to still have these on,” He chuckles, and you can’t help the tiny smirk on your lips.

“You want to come again, baby; so needy for me.” Jimin kisses your nose, his pelvis moving into the motions of your hand. His inhales grows slightly labored when you give a squeeze to his hardened bulge before you’re unbuttoning his jeans. They’re removed in moments, Jimin’s own efforts to pull of his boxers, exposing his dick, erect and sensitive enough to cause his breaths to shake when he palms himself, “You’re sure about no condom?”

“You know I’m covered there,” You say staring at his length, swallowing in anticipation for the feeling of Jimin inside of you. He notices your sultry gaze and leans back towards you, kissing you tenderly.

The emotion takes you back for a second, feeling somewhere between melancholic and warm, you’re brought back to his conviction that this would be the last time Jimin intends to be intimate with you. When his lips leave yours, your eyes are focused on Jimin’s. There’s so much you want to ask him, but when he’s as convinced as he is, what good would it do. You’re the only one with feelings surpassing love, or else he wouldn’t do this.

Jimin kisses you again, using the remnants of your previous orgasm to lubricate his length, before he’s aligning himself with your entrance and easing himself in. Your chest raises from a breath, listening to Jimin’s moans against your lips as he tops out into you, “You’re so good around me, baby. Fuck,” He grunts when your hips buck to his. You moan as his grinding begins slow in full movements to get your walls acclimated to his dick, though you’re already well stimulated.

“Fuck,” You gasp as his pace suddenly changes, Jimin pulling out only to pound back in and make you moan his name loudly. He kisses your lips before moving back to your cheek, jaw, and neck, every inch he could while he pumps into you over and over, every audible sound from you encouraging his actions. “Jimin, Jimin,” You beg using his name, feeling his hand find yours, fingers meshing as your voice grows higher from an oncoming wave wanting to burst through. “I’m close- shit--”

“God, you feel so good; your pussy takes me so well, baby,” Jimin kisses your lip hungrily, “Come for me, lovely; I’m going to,” Your hand squeezes him as the orgasm washes over you, listening to Jimin’s moaning as his seed fills you, “Fucking,” You come undone with him, the ride going through your core and releasing around Jimin’s dick as you moan loudly, senselessly, not caring if anyone could possibly hear.

Labored breathing flows into the silence of his room. Your free hand guides Jimin’s face to yours for a sweet kiss that he lets linger into a honeylike warmth. Pulling out, Jimin then lets himself fall into the bed beside you, hand still holding yours with a seeming refusal to let go. He watches quietly while you look at his ceiling aimlessly, breathing still full as your bodies calm down. “You still want us to stop.” A statement with the tone of a question.

“Yeah,” He bites his lip as you turn on your side to face him. He feels your hand grip his with a tiny tremble, and your eyes alone make his heart nearly shatter. You try your best to force the tiniest of smiles, but Jimin gently shakes his head, “Don’t pretend for my sake, sweetie.”

“It hurts.” You whisper to let out the emotions that want to escape as tears. Jimin frowns, pulling you towards him and embracing you so you could hide your face against his chest. “Are you sure this isn’t because of the thing with Yoongi?” You ask in a trembling voice while tears build in your eyes that you try to blink back.

“It’s not.” Jimin kisses the top of your head, his hands rubbing soothingly along your back, “It’s really not, baby.” He pauses, knowing there his reasoning isn’t completely selfish as he goes on, his voice sad and his reflecting that, “We just really can’t be there for each other like we’d need to be in a relationship, lovely. We’ll just hurt each other, more than we have been lately.”

You exhale a choppy breath, trying to even out your emotions for the sake of the last night with Jimin not being only tears.

You both flinch as the night sky outside flashes, with a medley of booming sounds murmuring out in the air. Jimin’s grasp on you strengthens, contemplative of what was going on as you shift to get sight of the window, covered except for the gap between the curtains.

“It must be midnight.” Your voice is hollow and you remove yourself from his warmth to crawl off the bed. Jimin’s eyes follow you inquisitive, a pit of worry brewing that you intend to leave until your hand pushes back one of the curtains, leaving the sheer set behind it out in the open. The colorful fireworks continue in happy, vibrant colors, spilling remnants of their energy as a reflection on your skin. Jimin stares in awe, silent as you turn back to face him, picturesque and ethereal in the celebratory lights. A contradiction to the events of his apartment.

A veil in the thin curtains acts as a separator between you both in the dimness of his room and the continuation of the world outside.

You walk back towards Jimin, crawling to his open arms on the bed as he greets your return with a kiss. You take it and any following in case they’re the last, settling into Jimin’s bed with him as the blankets cover your cuddling frames. It’s a long time of contentment in each other’s arms, while you both ignore that day means an end; trying to let the fireworks and their beauty be enough of a distraction between longing kisses.

Inevitably you fall asleep first, breaths soothing in sound and sight as Jimin admires the grace of your figure in his arms. He strokes your hair like you still needed to be lulled to slumber. He thinks what it would be like if he was on your side from the first instance of you bringing up that you wanted to be credited for your work, or if he hadn’t kept quiet about his opposite, selfish opinion this long and forwards.

Your sleeping body shifts, arms tightening around his waist. Jimin can’t help the little smile, wishing he had the same outlook as you just so it wouldn’t be the last night of you being practically his. Jimin’s lips find your peaceful forehead in a warm kiss, saying a whisper that he doubts he’ll ever get to say again, “I love you.”

if you enjoy please, please let me know! i hope you enjoy the series, i’m working really hard on it! : ) also don’t drag me for the smut in this chapter it may or may not be good idk im worried lmaoadsjfgk

tag list (send an ask to be added): @jaiuneamesolitaiire @tsvkino-usagi

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