#Aspberger's Syndrome

[giannic]

There's some truth behind this story.

My brother can fix any internal combustion engine, if you give him tools, space, and some time. I can speak several languages, read & write them. Now, I am studying Chinese. I'm musically inclined too. I wonder what hidden talents our two sisters have.

[melancholysway]

Howdy, (yes I'm southern) I'm Blue!!! Quick little fact about me: if I don't find some fanfics over 03 Donnie and fast, I'm gonna go fucking feral. Like out in the woods picking berries feral. Literally heart eyes every time I see him. It's marriage on the spot if he ever walks through the door. Like I got the ring already picked out and everything.

Anyways, it would fan fiddly tastic if you could provide me and all my mentally disordered brethren with some hcs over how the 03 boys would be with s/o who has Aspberger's syndrome. Think autism but watered down. If you would like some examples of behaviors and habits that stem from this, just let me know! If you have time for a long shot that would be epicly epic but I get it if a short shot would be easier for you.

Why don't I just right them myself? Next question!

Alrighty drink water and have fun!!!!

Hi Blue! First off, thank you for the explanation on Asperger's! Your information helped me write this fic to the best of my ability to fit your descriptions.

Second off, I'm so sorry this took fucking forever, I'm finally on summer break from the semester omfg. You also told me that the term "aspie" is not derogatory and since I had no idea how to tell the reader that Y/n in this fic has Asperger's, I thought it would be okay to just use "Aspie" when describing the reader in the title. If you don't like it, let me know and I'll switch it out :)

I'm fulfilling requests in the order they are received, which is also one of the reasons I held off on writing at all, because I really had a good idea for this one and wanted to write this first!

I really hope you enjoyed! I'm excited to be back writing!

TMNT 2003!Donnie x Aspie GN!Reader: WeekDay(s) in the Life of Donnie & Y/n

With Donatello getting together with you, he had to get used to a few things. Not that he already wasn’t aware since you were friends before dating, but just some things to keep in mind when it came to you:

1. You got into something new, like, every week. Sometimes, you’d get stuck on one thing and drop the one before. He had to learn how to get up to speed with your interests and hyper-fixations. 

Not that it bothered him, but he always wants to understand and learn what and why you’re so hyper-fixated on, even if it meant dropping his lab time to learn about it from you.

2. He has to explain his subtle sarcasm since you usually don’t pick up on it. 

As in, if he makes a joke, sarcastic remark, etc, and you don’t understand it, he doesn’t mind taking a step back to explain the syntax and linguistics of why it’s funny to try and get you to laugh

3. Unexplained excitement, he tries to match your energy for things you randomly get excited about, and it includes when you hand flap as well. Common among those with Asperger's, those that become excited hand flap as a stim. 

Despite Donnie’s usual quiet nature, he gets excited as well, especially if he has a “breakthrough” in his experiments, so he 100% understands the excitement part. 

He already understood most of how Asperger’s worked when it came to you alone and getting to know you more. 

It actually surprised him when you asked him to be your boyfriend. He seriously wasn’t expecting that to come out of your mouth. 

“Turtles are cute, you’re cute, duh, Don.” He’s sold. He liked you before, but now? How you’re not phased by his appearance? It’s perfect. 

In order for Donatello to understand you more, he decided to keep a journal in which he keeps track of everything about you and all about Asperger’s. The reason being, well, he really wanted to know how to be a supportive boyfriend for you!

Here’s a week-long entry from his initial observations, interactions, and thoughts- and guess what? It’s all about you! Cheers to the beginning stages of the relationship!

MONDAY:

In the afternoon, Y/n came into my lab, with the usual antics I would expect. However, I wasn’t sure why they were so excited. 

“And then I found out about how they eat their mates, and now I have to ask you, my super smart boyfriend, why?!”

Even though Y/n could have done a quick Google search, I loved that I was asked to answer that instead. It makes me feel included in their excitement, so I try to take part as much as I can. I’m actually not sure what possessed Black Widows to eat their mates, but it’s still pretty messed up. And if this excites Y/n, who am I to not share the reasoning? It’s cute, how excited they can get. I love it. 

“Well, um…”

 “Isn’t that just a socially acceptable form of cannibalism? Like, why did we make that okay? Or, why aren’t there spider laws in place to protect male widows? Or even….wait, why that look on your face?” Y/n probably thought I was lost, or annoyed even. 

I wonder what face I had on that caused Y/n to move on to talking to Mikey instead and hyping him up about justified cannibalism, yet I felt incomplete. But, if Y/n’s mind is moving quickly from topic to topic, person to person, I should wait until they come back to me. In the meantime, generating a long fact sheet about Black Widows for Y/n is on my to-do list.

Maybe I should’ve said how I wasn’t annoyed. In fact, I was intrigued. 

Donnie’s Notes:

Y/n’s actually right, Widows are just socially acceptable cannibals

Make a Black Widow fact sheet

Tell Y/n tomorrow that I wasn’t annoyed

Search up potential jokes about Black Widows

TUESDAY:

Today, I thought I’d test the waters with some Black Widow jokes. I’m gonna be honest, I looked them up. There are not many on the internet, and as smart as I am, I sort of lack in the joke department. That’s more Mikey’s thing, anyway. 

So when Y/n came into my lab today, I wanted to impress them with my (stolen) joke.

“I actually have a gift for you,” 

“Donnie, you really don’t have to get me anything.” Y/n’s typically straightforward and honest, though my gift isn’t materialistic, it’s still of interest to them. 

“Why do Widows kill their partners after they mate?” After wiggling my nonexistent eyebrows, I’m still met by Y/n’s usual stoic expression to my jokes or remarks. 

“Is this an actual question? I’m not really sure, that’s why I asked you.” Y/n says though I can tell based on the awkward neck scratching that they don’t think for a moment that it could be a joke. 

“No, they can’t stand listening to them snoring. Ba dum psh!” 

“...” 

Okay, not my best joke. 

“Sorry you had to sit through that awful joke, but, I made you this-” After printing out the document I wrote up for Y/n, they watch as the paper comes out from the printer. Fresh, the best kind of printer paper. 

“It’s a…” After examining the paper for a minute, it ends with Y/n smiling. I added photos, statistics, and everything I could find about Black Widows that Y/n might want to know. 

“Wow! Thank you, Donnie! You’re such a smart guy, this really makes up for the horrible joke earlier!” Ouch, but, they’re not wrong. It was an um…shitty joke, to say the least. I should’ve rehearsed it in the mirror. 

The rest of the day Y/n was in the Lair consisted of a recall of all the facts on the sheet. We spent our time doing thorough research on the ones that Y/n was particularly interested in. The red mark on the spider’s backs, why they eat their mates, and (for some reason) we went down the rabbit hole of “famous” human cannibals. Upon further research, we learned that if you salt human meat, it actually contracts. It grossed me out but sparked Y/n’s interest. I kind of wanna stop eating pepperoni pizza now. Mushrooms were always my favorite topping, anyway. I was NOT going to make a fact sheet for human cannibalism. In fact, I decided to go with the flow of Y/n’s interests, if we were focused on Black Widows for the week, that’s what we were focused on. 

Come to think of it, Y/n has introduced me to many new facts that I never knew about when it came to their interests. Crystals, trees, birds, anything. I’m usually only fixated on science/microbiology, not the bigger things that make up our world. It’s one of the many things I really like about Y/n as a person and as a partner. I’m constantly learning something new despite being a technical genius. Haha, I just called myself a genius, is that narcissistic of me?

WEDNESDAY:

Since today was our group sparring day, Y/n came in the early evening to watch us. Although they’re usually interested in sparring physically, they just didn’t seem up to it, which was fine by Splinter. He was always adamant about observing and learning by watching. Plus, Y/n seemed to be really entertained by our sparring.

 I hope I don’t mess up today, I’d hate to feel embarrassed. I think Y/n prefers to watch us since its fewer eyes on them, which is understandable. The center of attention wasn’t always their favorite thing, anyway. 

I’m learning more things about Y/n day by day, and writing it down is making it easier to keep up with whatever they’re interested in. Because I was invited to watch a short documentary about Black Widows at Y/n’s apartment, their current interest seems to be just that. Not that I’m bothered, however, Raph seems a little nervous that Y/n’ll somehow find one and bring it down to the Lair to show us. He usually isn’t fazed by their sudden interests, but THIS one got him in a chokehold. I don’t think Y/n would actually find a Widow, though. 

~~~

I was…well, embarrassed. Turns out, Mikey had some new move up his sleeve, and body slammed me to the ground. So, so, so embarrassing. 

“Woah! You okay, Donnie? Mikey slammed you into next week!” Despite the pain I was in, I still flashed a small smile, to let Y/n know I was fine. They seemed to be really into my safety of the little things. Sparring, during lab experiments, etc. I actually played back the many times I was given a lecture from Y/n about lab safety when they caught me not wearing goggles. I wear them all the time now. 

THURSDAY:

It’s day 4 of Black Widows. I decided to set up a docu night in my lab with Y/n. It included their favorite movie snacks (Y/n gave me a list just in case I planned something like this and was unsure of what to get them) as well as mine. Though I’m not sure if I can stomach a Widow eating its mate, I’ll endure it for Y/n’s sake. 

Y/n loved the documentary. It’s a trend I’ve noticed when I began to date them. Whatever we did didn’t matter, as long as we were both interested in what we were doing and doing it together. These past few days I’ve learned a lot just from Y/n’s sudden interest that I'm beginning to enjoy it equally as much. I wonder if I can find other media that might excite them.

I had the urge to cuddle Y/n, though I only acted on it after the documentary. I thought I’d be distracting, only for them to tell me they were waiting for me too. 

I hope Mikey (or worse, Raph) doesn’t find this, but I seriously got butterflies when I had them in my arms. I held a loose grip, just in case Y/n felt restricted in any way, but they seemed to enjoy it. Plus, if they didn’t, they would’ve told me. 

FRIDAY:

Nothing much out of the ordinary happened today.

(that's a lie)

Y/n actually asked to kiss me today before leaving. Which I don’t think I was ready for. Sure, I’ve been thinking about kissing them, but I wasn’t sure how to do it or ask. But Y/n- blunt as they are- straight up asked. I think that’s one of the great contrasts between me and Y/n. It’s in their nature to just say what’s on their mind or be blunt. Straightforwardness doesn’t come easy to me, but I find it to be beneficial when it comes to our relationship so far. Though we’re still in the beginning month of our relationship, I think a way I’m stepping out of my comfort zone is being with Y/n- who appears to be the polar opposite of me in terms of socialness. I’m more reserved or to myself, usually talking when spoken to, or if something’s really important that I have to share. 

I admire that part of Y/n- even if they aren’t aware of it. I could really work on saying what’s on my mind more. 

So when Y/n asked out of nowhere if they could kiss me, why would I refuse? Of course, I wanted to!

And you know what, little journal? It was amazing. My first kiss and it was with someone special. 

Donnie’s Notes:

Quickly yet informatively, I’m learning more and more about Y/n and how Asperger’s affects them every day. I’m learning that it’s okay to be extremely giddy and excited over something in my lab, knowing Y/n would love to hear about it and geek out with me too. I’m learning that Y/n genuinely enjoys my lab, and finds something new in it every day to ask me about since it’s always changing and growing. They enjoy what I have to say, and if it comes down to it, we could go weeks straight talking to each other about whatever interests us. I learned that whenever Y/n gets really excited when talking, they do this gesture with their hands- and when I asked- it’s called hand flapping. A response to when their mind gets excited and their body has to show it. It’s adorable, just like them.

And that, dear readers, was Donnie’s week-long journal entry about you. 

Though he’d literally take this to the grave, it’s nice knowing that Donatello takes an interest in you as a person and your personality, understanding how you operate and continuously attempting to match your energy. 

2003 Donnie is extremely pensive; constantly wanting to do new things or learn new things

So, what better way than to do it with his S/O, who ALSO has a constant need for excitement in new information or concepts?

Needless to say, dating Donatello entails that you will not be disappointed! Donnie is peaceful, has a thirst for knowledge, becomes hyper-fixated on little inventions, loves learning new things, and loves a S/O who can have the same multitude of interests as him (even more!)

//

For: @thats-not-very-cash-money-of-you

Taglist:

@bee-1n-space @ducky-died-inside @xnorthstar3x @writingandcrying

Masterlist

D I S C O R D

[bigeyedchangelingchild]

sic-semper-hominibus

the less/more thing is definitely part of it. the bigger part is that what there is implied to be less/more of is brokenness; "functioning" serves as a euphemism for humanity, with so-called "low-functioning" people being regarded less like people and more like pets. essentially, it's the same distinction hans aspberger made between people with his syndrome, who he thought could be rehabilitated to benefit nazi germany, and autistic people, who he sent to the camps

the support needs framework takes an entirely different focus; rather than how "severe" someone's autism is (read: how much of a problem they are for the people around them) it centers the autistic person and what they need in order to live the life they want

on the surface, the difference is a subtle distinction between "how much accommodation do you need" vs "how much of a hassle are you" but the underlying attitudes are very different

i am autistic if that affects your reading of my response

Last reply first, for clarity for anyone else who wants to respond, I am open to both autistic and allistic voices. I’ve heard the idea that functioning labels are bad, but levels are necessary and non-problematic from enough autistic people that it’s not that I’m not like, I need to know what Autistic people think. It’s more like, I need to understand why the people who do think that way are thinking that way if that makes sense.

So essentially, and feel free to correct me if I’m misunderstanding, the issue that functioning labels has, that support needs does not, is the language of functioning is tied closely to eugenics, and the language of support needs has better connotations, by being “person-centred”

[kozukenkitten]

Howdy, I'd like a matchup for the arcana if you're doing those :)

I’m Callie, a pansexual 5’5 Cis female with dirty blonde hair, freckles, and blue green eyes. I’m an INFP-T, gemini, and Hufflepuff. I have Aspberger’s syndrome and adhd which causes me to be somewhat socially awkward even though I like attention and act confident. I’m easily distracted and tend to start projects I easily lose motivation for. I also hyperfixate on a different topic every week (especially entomology, mythology, and zoology) and all I want to do is analyze everything about said topic, this past week was moths. I absolutely adore animals and bugs (especially the creepy crawlies) and I have a tendency to hoard pets, everything from dogs and cats to snakes and tarantulas. Also might be getting a wildlife rehabbing permit soon, fingers crossed. I practice suomenusko which combines Finnish tradition and culture with pagan beliefs. My patron god is Loki and I’m hoping to start working with Hecate soon. My hobbies include writing, drawing, crocheting, and electric guitar. When I become overstimulated, I stim, and I have two types of stimming: happy stimming which includes flapping my hands and running around and angry stimming which includes biting my hands and pulling my hair out. I’m a bit chaotic and impulsive and I love making people laugh. I have a very odd sense of humor which is utterly destroyed by modern day memes (I couldn’t stop laughing over a bass boosted picture of a toothbrush once). I also procrastinate. Like a lot. And occasionally I have depressive episodes where I lose motivation to do literally anything. My clothing style consists of a mixture between traditional Celtic and cottagecore; I like dresses and braids. I am not afraid to call anybody out on their bullshit, which gets me in trouble sometimes lol. A witch! It all started when I began collecting crystals :). I can be loud and excitable but I usually only show this side of me to people I know won’t judge me for it. My love language is definitely physical touch and gifts. I love making stuff for people and I’m touch starved lol. I’m definitely a hoarder, I’ve got so much stuff, blame it on my goblin tendencies. I love collecting stuff from nature such as bones, feathers, rocks, bugs, and plants. I’m also a bit of a forager, chicken of the woods is my favorite mushroom! I… don’t particularly enjoy children. They just have no boundaries :/. I probably will never be able to fully deal with children because of my disorders, but I have four nephews and being a cool aunt is enough for me. Besides, my animals are basically my kids anyways, I absolutely dote on them and they’re my pride and joy.

Hello lovely! I'm so sorry I'm just now getting to this! Life has been wild, and I just opened tumblr up for the first time in AGES. T.T

My first immediate instinct is to say I'd match you with Julian! I can picture you two together, earning a reputation as an insanely charismatic gremlin duo. You and he would get along so well, and I can see him keeping up with your boundless thoughts very well, and vice versa. You both tend to shy away at first from others, but when given the time to blossom and come out of your shell (if you'll pardon the mixed plant and animal metaphors, lol), you'll find so many mutual interests that you won't know where to start!

If you don't think this man's gonna be right there with you, foraging mushrooms and collecting interesting rocks, feathers, bones, etc. you're wrong. And I think he's relatively ambivalent about whether he wants kids, like, he's open to it, but absolutely doesn't need them, and to some extent, genuinely believes it'd be better if he never had any at all, so he wouldn't be bothered if he never had any. He would 100% adore doting on your nieces and nephews, though, and would be the best proud uncle!

This man's like a crow, and he will court you like one: he will bring you all of the shinies, and surprise you by leaving little trinkets and rocks, crystals, feathers, all sorts of goodies, around the house for you to discover. He will also happily listen to you talk about your hyperfixations for hours, especially if you're willing to return the favor.

[darkdansdarkestdays]

Yeah man, as much as I appreciate everyone's collective effort to determine which serious mental defect I have.....cuz it's at least one, obviously, I suppose? The latest: Nope. I do not suffer from autism, neither do I suffer from its meeker cousin, Aspberger's syndrome. ADHD/ADD? Yes...and, I heard that they are, essentially, very mild forms of autism so....there ya go. Good call, I suppose. In truth, drugs were quite common by the time I entered middle school and I partook often...addictive lyrics. It was for this reason, I believe, that diagnoses of competent doctors were sometimes tough to come by, and were even occasionally reversed by a head-shaking physician months or years afterward. The only thing I am certain to suffer from is addiction.

[specialparentsconfidential]

Special Parents Confidential Episode 57 Parent Stories 02

Special Parents Confidential Episode 57 Parent Stories 02

Special Parents Confidential 57 Parent Stories 02

We continue our new series of episodes dedicated to Parent Stories – real life experiences raising a child with special needs.

When I first started doing these podcast episodes, my goal was to provide two things – answers and advice from experts on many subjects of concern to parents of special needs kids, and stories of experience from other…

[mysticalarbitertyrant]

Are You a Technowitch?

Some people happily identify with that moniker; others would bristle at the thought...and most of us are somewhere in the middle.

So what IS a TechnoWitch, anyway? (These are my own definitions, for what they're worth.)

A TechnoWitch is someone who utilizes whatever technology is around them, in addition to whatever other magical tools they have nearby to accomplish their magical ends - but it definitely includes a tech component.

Technomagic is when modern technology currently available is used in unexpected ways to perform magic. Some of these 'unexpected ways' to use tech may be quite different than their original intended uses.

Technomancy (also my own definition, for right or wrong) is magic that uses technology to its limit, is more...arcane in nature, and is purposefully seeking the limits of where the pairing can go, falling directly into the realm of chaos magic.

In my mind, if you were to compare them directly, I'd see technomagic as "convenience-driven,” while technomancy would be planned and ‘experimental.’

So... After reading the definitions, I ask again:

Are YOU a TechnoWitch?

Of the witchy people I've spoken with, many would answer that question 'no,'...until they start thinking of all the apps on their phone, or that their witchy businesses are conducted mostly online, and many of their books are on apps... I could keep going, but you get the picture. Once they take stock of things - really stop and look - they realize they are more of a technowitch than they originally would've believed. Or...if they aren't quite willing to claim the title 'technowitch' - they find themselves in the position of admitting they're using technology and magic, and didn't realize they did, which in a way, is worse. That's the scenario we routinely caution newbie witches about. When you use magic without understanding what you do, the results can backfire. You either get nothing, or something you didn't intend for (at best), or it spectacularly backfires and you end up with a worse situation than whatever you were magicking for (at worst).

As technology around us continues to grow and expand, and so does the number of youthful witches who are unafraid of technology who have no qualms about combining the two, we need to ask ourselves some really hard, honest questions:

Where is this magic, and magic in general going?

How far can you take the combination of magic and tech?

What are the good points?

Are there any drawbacks?

How is technomagic being used?

Is it apps?

Is it my computer, or browser?

Is it my KitchenAid mixer? My smart appliances?

Is it Facebook, Twitter, Instagram and every other social media platform?

Is it all of it?

Where is the line drawn before something goes from being mundane to magical?

Is it being used against us, without our knowledge or explicit consent?

Do you recognize the various types of techno-spells when you come across them?

Ultimately, if you aren't aware that something IS magical, when you see it and don't recognize it for what is is...it can be used against you. Don't let yourself be caught unawares.

Don't let others co-opt your power.

I started researching the topic of TechnoMagic when I began to write a story for my next book in the "Magic Abounds" series. It's about a woman with Aspbergers' Syndrome, who spends most of her time in Second Life. She starts doing magic in-world, not realizing that it can effect the real world...and drama ensues.

As I began to research, I realized some things: first, that I was more of a technowitch than I thought, and I began to see that technomagic surrounds us as witches use the objects around them in magical ways - sometimes intentionally, and other times, without realizing they are. I also realized that social media is rife with magic - in good ways, and in bad ways, and some of the bad ways are insidious, and dare I say it - borderline evil. I don't normally define things (particularly magic) as black and white or good and evil, but... How else would you term a magic where someone is trying to do magic intentionally, while flying under the radar unnoticed, and attempting to get you to use YOUR power to power THEIR magic? Go ahead. Try to find a different way to define that other than evil. I couldn't find another way. Be aware of what you like and share.

Interested?

TechnoWitch will be released this month (Sept 2021)! Whether you love or hate the combination of technology and magic, join the conversation. We're at an amazing time and place in history. We get to decide where magic goes from here.

Special thanks go out to those of you on Tumblr that took the time to answer questions and have some really interesting discussions!

[marbledgummies2]

STOP. SAYING. ASPBERGERS. a rant from your local autist.

So to begin this rant, the term “Aspbergers” or “Aspbergers syndrome”, comes from the man Hans Aspberger. 

Hans Asperger first designated a group of children with distinct psychological characteristics as ‘autistic psychopaths’ in 1938,  which would only find international acknowledgement in the 1980s as Autism became increasingly stigmatized / taboo. He's often referred to as a "pioneer", despite his practices and background, so here’s where we go into the actual meat of why you shouldn’t use that fucking word !

HANS. ASPBERGER. WAS. A. NAZI. he was a fucking nazi. and some journals might phrase it as “he worked under a nazi regime”, no bitch he actively worked with and was provided career opportunities by the nazi party, and his work directly tied to killing autistic kids.

Uta Frith’s 1991 book chapter “Asperger and his syndrome” barely mentioned his ties to the nazi party in the few pages dedicated to Asperger’s professional and personal lif, instead favoring the stance that  “Asperger clearly cared about these children, who in most people’s eyes were simply obnoxious brats” there are multiple papers doing this, saying he “cared” or whatever bullshit. it’s bullshit. it’s literally a sack of shit from privileged people who don’t care to look at the fact that he only “cared” about the kids he and the nazi party deemed useful to society, and ones that didn’t meet the standards of “aspbergers syndrome” were taken away to be euthanized. more or less, Although the precise nature of Asperger’s relationship to Nazi’s has been the elephant in the room for some time in the german community, the necessary questions have so far evidently either not been asked at all, or they have been answered on the basis of a too limited number of sources. some say he opposed the hygenics program, some say he didn’t, but in my humble opinion  ✨ it doesn’t matter because his actions directly led to autistic children being killed and i really don’t care how exactly he felt about other practices of the nazi party when he ultimately contributed to the death toll and his career was paved with the deaths of those kids. ✨

if you don’t believe me, here’s a letter where he details “ If she cannot be helped, it would be better if she died. She would not have anything in this world, she would only be ridiculed by others. As the mother of so many other children she would not want that for her, so it would be better if she died. “ in a letter to a mother about her autistic child, here’s a form where he details a three year old girls autism and inability to recover , admitting her to the  Reich Committee for the Scientific Registration of Serious Hereditary and Congenital Illnesses ( which was their super secret program where they killed kids ) she was later induced with pneumonia and died.

stop fucking using this term. it’s painted in the blood of children who had no reason to die other than a nazi thought they couldn’t be useful to society.

[merrillmastersenglish]

Disability and LOVE in ‘reality’ tv

For many people love is the most important thing in their lives. It is one of the oldest motivations of characters as well-- from Romeo and Juliet to Simon and the Homosapien Agenda-- love is everywhere in literature and popular culture. Society seems to be surprised though when disabled people want love too. This shock manifests in shows that center around the disabled person's quest for love-- as though their love stories cannot possibly exist naturally, without prompting. Netflix's program "Love on the Spectrum" is one such rendition of displaying "love" for disabled adults. Likewise, our neighbors across the pond have a similarly popular show about love for the disabled population entitled "The Undatables." These shows, while attempting to dismantle stereotypes, actually further them, and in essence, they continue to subjugate disabled people to the fringes of society. 

As the mother of two children who are on the autism spectrum (asd), I was initially very excited to see the show "Love on the Spectrum" pop up in my suggestions on Netflix. I'm not going to lie, I binge watched the entire first season as soon as it came out. I was giddy at the prospect that my child could find love someday-- after all, all a mother wants for their children is for them to be happy-- and societal norms force us to believe that happiness is entirely dependent upon 'love.'  Movies, television, songs, and other artistic expressions center around devastation after love loss and elation at new love. We have shows that prod us to believe that love can be found instantaneously, and others that masquerade physical attraction as love. What these things are lacking though-- is diversity of people in abilities and minds. 

Pause.

It's important to note the very real struggles that parents have, not to celebrate them as some sort of hero, or to say that all disabilities are the same, but to recognize the motivations for feelings like I am expressing. I get it, when you don't experience the challenges day in and out like parents like myself do, it is hard to imagine the elation that I describe and you could easily sit in judgement. I fully recognize that my excitement as a parent for the dating show of people who have ASD could perpetuate the stereotypes that I am speaking to; I am very aware of this juxtaposition I find myself in. But you see, I am the mother of an "aspie" (person with aspberger's syndrome)-- and when my son was little, he never said he loved me. I used to cry about it, uncontrollably-- and then feel REALLY guilty that I felt that way. I thought-- maybe he doesn't love me, a doubt which often consumed those precious moments which were quiet. When he did start saying 'I love you' it was parroting. In the ASD community this is known as echolalia.  Echolalia is essentially when a person repeats something that they hear-- so mother says 'i love you' and child says 'i love you,' but no emotion is noticeable when the words are presented. At times my son is violent. There have been moments where I have had to restrain him-- for his safety and my own. My daughter is also autistic. While she presents differently, both she and my son have difficulty making friends. They each have roughly three friends, of those friends only one friend is close enough to consider a best friend. My son can't have sleepovers because the transitions and the routines are so different that they make him anxious. His anxiety comes out as anger, anger that parents of neurotypical children don't understand. For these reasons and more, I have spent many nights staring at the ceiling of my bedroom, wondering if my children will find happiness, and I have grieved the loss of the 'idea' of being a parent of a neurotypical child, not because I don't love my children, but because I struggle and I know someday they will too-- this is just not what I was told being a parent would be like. If I were to analyze these shows from a reader response lens it would be easy, my reaction to them is elation initially. Why? I believe I covered this in great detail above. My life experiences have caused me to be a cynic at the thought of my own children finding love.  But this is not a reader response type of analysis, because as an academic I can also see very problematic issues with the shows themselves.  

The very first issue is the language that is used in some of the shows. Often they set the participants apart by using words that seem to conflate able bodied/neurotypical mindedness as norm. This is blatantly clear in the title of the UK show "The Undatables," and disabled people have taken up pen (or keyboard) to challenge this very wording. Just because someone has a disability does not mean that they are not datable. Frankly, the only people who are "undatable" are those who literally cannot move or consent to date. 

Secondly, shows like "Too Hot to Handle," "Love Island," "The Bachelor"/ "The Bachelorette," are populated only with neurotypical/able-bodied people. In my reality tv viewing history I can only recall seeing one person on a show that sometimes results in finding love (Big Brother) who was neurodiverse-- but even then-- other contestants singled him out and had comments to say about his Autism. The lack of diversity in mind and body on these shows perpetuates the stereotype of a "normal" type of body, which is absurd because realistically (and according to Robert Parker's book) able-bodied people are only temporarily able-bodied. 

There are some things that these shows are doing right though-- and one that is present in both is an explanatory piece in each episode. Both shows work to incorporate information about the person's disability and what it means for their struggle to find a partner. This is a real thing.  Likewise though, able-bodied people also struggle with dating. Wouldn't it be more realistic to show people in their real state?  Wouldn't it be beneficial to breaking barriers-- for us to display disabled people intermingling in the dating pool of able-bodied people?  I mean, certainly there are able-bodied people who have fallen in love with disabled people and visa-versa. Is reality TV actually trying to tell us that disabled people can date only people who are the same or similar to them?

In the end, while there are a few things right with love shows about disabled love, what I'm saying is-- if we are serious about changing the dangerous stereotypes of the disabled community-- we should start at the heart. 

[boringsofia]

Matchups for Dbh, Tmnt 2012, and marvel if that's okay. My name is Blue, I'm a pansexual female with Aspberger's syndrome and adhd. I have a deep passion for animals and have tons of pets. I'm honest, blunt, open-minded and affectionate. I like crocheting, drawing, and olaying video games. I cuss a lot, don't take shit from anyone, and never back down from a fight be it verbally or physically but I don't go actively seeking one either. I like making people stuff and am very crafty. Thank you!

Thank you so much for the request! I'm sorry for the long wait! Enjoy, darling!

For D:BH I ship you with...

Ralph!

You and Ralph found each other way before the Revolution. You were exploring when you came across the little abandoned house he was hiding in. After the little scare and short introductions, he was absolutely infatuated by you.

After you took him home, he mostly just tended to the garden (if you have one) and played/watched after your pets when you were gone. His favorite things about you are your name and personality. He finds you name really cute and creative and called most of his plants, that you bought him, by colors as well. When it comes to your caring and affectionate personality, he tries to reciprocate the care and affection you give as best as he can. He's still learning to feel emotion and accept himself for who he is and you help him through it all. He helps you through everything and anything as well. If you take medication of any sort, he will make sure you never forget to take it on time. He will also practice your hobbies while you're away so that he can join you once you're home.

Ralph absolutely adores you, reminding you of how grateful he is that you accepted him and showed what it feels like to be loved and wanted.

"Ralph loves Blue very much. Blue taught him how good it feels to be loved."

For TMNT (2012) I ship you with...

Donatello!

You're the first human he didn't meet through April! You two actually met by accident. He was on patrol with his brothers when he got distracted and missed a step, proceeding to stumble down a fire escape. And landing infront of your window. Where you were sitting at.

After that, you two became close friends and eventually, with the help of his brothers who you met later on, a couple. Honestly, it was your honesty and straightforwardness that caught his interest. At first, he ignored his affections as he was still getting over April, which you helped him through a lot. But eventually his brothers caught on and forced him to ask you out. Mikey used to tease you that you actually belonged with Leo because of your name and, let me tell you, Donnie was NOT happy. He gets easily jealous but you always reassure him you love him and only him. Just like he reassures you that he will always look after you. He loves how you don't let people push you around and although he does stand up for you, he knows you can fight your own battles.

At the end of the day, he loves to see you playing video games with his brothers, watching you draw in his room and appreciates every little gift you make and give him. He gets shy when you show affection but he will always return it.

"Did you.. make this for me?.... I'm not crying... Just ... allergic to... um ... ok yes, I'm crying."

For Marvel I ship you with...

Wanda Maximoff/Scarlet Witch!

Red and Blue. It just goes perfectly together. Well, at least that's what Pietro said when he got found out about his sister's feelings for you. And later on, he said the exact same to you when he found out about your feelings for her.

Wanda was attracted to you when she saw you absolutely destroying a man's ego for talking shit about her. She had always respected you and found you cute when you were just friends but she never saw this side of you before. She loved it, though. Your first date was rather simple, just a cute, little picnic in a secluded part of the park with an amazing view to the city. It was honestly the most fun she ever had and it's a memory she will never forget. Wanda doesn't really share any of the hobbies you have but that doesn't stop her from joining you every once in a while. Most of the time she just watches with a smile, asking questions every so often out of pure curiosity. Other times she just sits with you, reading a book or singing a little song with playing the guitar. She just loves to sit next to you, even if you're not being affectionate, she just likes to feel your presence.

Like Ralph, she will always remind you to take your medicine and take care of yourself. She will sit there listening to you ramble about animals anytime and even owns a whole bookcase for JUST your gifts. She simply loves you and will be there to care for and protect you.

"Pietro was right, cvet. Red and Blue do go perfectly together."

[eveenstar]

Can I have a Rdr2 matchup please? I'm a 5'5 pansexual white woman with ash blonde hair and blue-green eyes. I have Aspberger's syndrome and adhd which means I've got busy brain and I'm always doing something with my hands and am very energetic and hyper. I have total crackhead energy (but i don't do drugs) and I have a deep love for animals. I work as vet tech currently and have many many animals including dogs, cats, birds, fish, snakes, and my beloved coatimundi. I love art. 1/2

I'm very physically affectionate, I like crocheting, reading, writing, and running. I love reciting dead memes and making awful puns. I'm loud and expressive but can be quite at times. I usually don't have any drama in my friend group so I'm the one they drop their drama on and I'm a good shoulder to cry on. I love to laugh and make people laugh and will do anything to put a smile on someone's face. I'm a gemini. I'm agnostic and superstitious and actively practice witchcraft. Thank you! 2/2

You sound like such a kind and nice person! Also, not to sound too intrusive, witchcraft? Join the club! I match you with...Lenny Summers!

I think you two would be unstoppable together. Lenny being this  intelligent, fun-loving, cocky and confident young man and you being this affectionate, expressive, kind and caring you lady! He loves how energetic you are, sometimes you can make everyone from the camp laugh and bring a nice energy to it. He supports your beliefs, probably will make a few questions out of curiosity. Lenny loves to learn new things! Of course, with you involved it’s more fun. Everytime he sees an animal, he thinks about you! 

[thiseprsonoded]

As a person with perhaps aspbergers syndrome I don't particularly enjoy interacting with authority figures like clockwork for some sort of a 🚔🚔🚔🚔 test trial run or 💩💩💩 skits? Practice actingggggg??? ... I cannot tell dumb people it's not worth losing twenty years of their life but they're the ones dying for NFL as their guy gets paralyzed on live television for a unprompted bad form tackle

[boymare]

MIKE  WHEELER’S  MENTAL  HEALTH     ✩   PART II

ASPERGERS  SYNDROME     ❭       [     falls   under  autism   spectrum   disorder    ]     the   core   aspect   being   trouble   with   social   skills,      obsessive   tendencies   on   particular   subjects,      repetitive   behavior,      as   well   as   physical   clumsiness.      mike   displayed   symptoms   early   on,      as   young   as   five   years   old.      more here. 

GENERALIZED  ANXIETY  DISORDER     ❭      [    a   subset   of   asperger’s   ]      -      once   again, something   that   mike   displayed   symptoms   of   at   a   very   young   age,      seemingly   a   twitchy,      nervous   child.      symptoms   include   excessive   worry       -        typically   beyond   his   control     -       with   the   consistent   anticipation   of   disaster,      thus   he’s   susceptible   to   overthinking.      due   to   his   discomfort   with   uncertainty,      mike   exhibits   controlling   behaviors,      often   feeling   the   need   to   plan   things   out   to   the   most   minute   detail.      lastly,      mike   is   a   very   tense   boy,      often   finding   it   hard   to   relax;      frequently   restless.       [   these   symptoms   were   heightened   following   the   events   of   season   1   with   the   development   of   PTSD   ].

POST TRAUMATIC  STRESS DISORDER    ❭      [    developed   following   season 1,      symptoms   are   most   notable   during   season 2    ]        the   most   significant   symptom   displayed   in   mike   is   the   change   in   mood;      in   season   2   he’s   noticeably   colder,      harsh   and   quicker   to   anger.      other   symptoms   include   intrusive   memories      [   one   may   notice   that   he   goes   quiet,      presumably   lost   in   thought   ],      avoidance      [   particularly   when   discussing   certain   topics   ].      he   experiences   a   sense   of   detachment   from   family   and   friends.      mike   is   also   prone   to   irritability,      angry   outbursts,      and   aggressive   behavior.      he’s   always   on   guard   for   danger    and   overly - protective   of   others,      especially   his   loved   ones      [  most   notably,      will   byers  ].      lastly,      he   develops   problems   with   sleeping   due   recurrent   nightmares   and   anxiety . 

DEPRESSION    ❭     [    developed following season 1    ]      it’s   common   for   those   with  aspbergers    syndrome   to   suffer   from   depression   and   anxiety,      however   mike   never   experienced   depression   before   the   events   of   season   one.      with   what   he   thought   to   be   the   death   of   jane      /      eleven   came   feelings   of   sadness,      emptiness,      and   anxiety.      upon   will’s   return   from   the   upside   down,      joyce   kept   him   home   to   recover,      away   from   school   and   his   friends   for   quite   some   time      [   as   confirmed   in   a   comic  ],      which   also   saddened   mike   as   he   was   not   able   to   be   there   for   his   friend   in   the   way   that   he    wanted   to.      there’s   also   the   matter   of   guilt,      self - imposed,      mike   placing   the   responsibility   of   many   things   that   went   wrong   upon   himself,      despite   not   being   at   fault.      mike   is   noticeably   more   irritable   in   season   two,      toward   his   parents   and   even   his   own   friends,      who   we   all   know   he   adores.      there’s   loss   of   interest   in   activities   previously   enjoyed,      as   we   see   mike   spending   more   time   alone   than   with   his   friends. 

INSOMNIA    ❭      mike’s   trouble   with   falling   asleep   is   directly   linked   to   the   anxiety,      depression,      and   PTSD   that   he   experiences.      [   it’s   yet   another   contributor   to   mike’s   rampant   irritability   ].      recurring   nightmares   often   deter   mike   from   wanting   to   sleep;      he’s   typically   awake   at   all   hours   of   the   night,      finding   ways   to   entertain   himself   such   as   reading,      writing,      listening   to   music,      or   watching   movies   on   vhs.      he’s   often   very   tired   throughout   the   day   and   lacks   concentration   during   classes,      which   caused   his   grades   to.  drop      [   not   that   they   were   exceptional   to   begin   with   ].  

[nataliealexxxa]

“You don’t look like you have it! You’re so ‘hot’ and well spoken!” Looks can be deceiving. 🌑 #worldautismawarenessday #worldautismmonth #asd #autism #autismawareness #aspbergers #aspiegirl 🌑World Autism Awareness Day is an internationally recognized day on 2 April every year, encouraging Member States of the United Nations to take measures to raise awareness about people with autistic spectrum disorders including autism and Asperger syndrome throughout the world. “Those are all just roles you forced me to play. Under all these lives I've lived something else has been growing. I've evolved into something new. And I have one last role to play. Myself.” . 📷 @brianmichaelphoto (at Manhattan, New York) https://www.instagram.com/p/B-e0QYIpGkR/?igshid=1ae29ckigexcs

[mokhosz]

Melvoin: Prince wasn’t a great communicator — but when he would record, that was him communicating. I almost feel in some ways that he had Aspberger syndrome, he had this extraordinary ability to focus and also to open up his unconscious mind, to connect to that dream state that Freud and Jung talked about that’s so deep that many of us can’t [access] it. He had that ability, and I don’t even think he knew that he had it; it might be under the spectrum of autism. He wasn’t purposely rude, but there was never smalltalk, ever, ever. He just didn’t have that.

McCreary: As hard as it was to work with him, he was such a musical genius. I watched him develop from such a young age. He had such an understanding of music, it was just amazing to watch him. For hours he would just sit and play the piano, and it was so calming watching him, he played so beautifully. It was an honor and a privilege to work with him and know him [to the degree that] I did — but it was hard. It was really hard. There was never a “job well done” or a thank you or anything. I remember we had finished “1999” and a Time album and we were working on something else and I said, “Do you like my work?” And he just looked at me and said “You’re here, aren’t you?”

[banditlikemeeyesfullofstars]

Me: Generalized Anxiety Disorder, Major Depressive Disorder, Anterior Cutaneous Nerve Entrapment Syndrome, & Long Term Sequela of Leukemia Treatment

Hubs: Generalized Anxiety Disorder, Aspbergers, & Sciatic Neuritis

Together: Two Swifties in Love for Almost 13 Years & Slaying the Disabled Selfie Night 🤳🏻

@taylorswift @taylornation @swiftiesofcolor