#BACK THAT DUMPTRUCK UP BABY BOY

[therhythmafterthesummer]

IF you ever change your mind and your fingers are itching to post the pretty getting a backhanded compliment Drabble just know that I’ll be willing to receive

previous ask for reference

you know what??? sure. this is way longer than i remembered it to be so i'm not sure i can call it a drabble anymore lol

Pairing: Werewolf!Chan x Human!F.Reader (one of the main pairings of my WereRoomies series, but you don’t really need to read any other instalments to understand/enjoy this one). | Word Count: ~3k | Themes & Warnings: fantasy/supernatural AU · smut | established relationship | physical descriptors of the reader such as: being curvy/chubby and having an absolute dumptruck · annoying co-workers · usage of the word fat in a very neutral manner · Chris in a suit (figured that warrants a warning) · alcohol consumption (very moderate) · possessiveness · pet names · oral [F.Rec] · unprotected penetration [piv. no barrier method used, but reader is presumed to be on some form of birth control] · praising · creampie · breeding kink

You hardly ever attended events related to work. You only got along with a few people there who you even hung out with outside of the office sometimes, people who coincidentally also hardly ever attended these events. But for some reason, your boss really wanted you to come to this party, and when she told you you could bring a plus one, you figured having your lovely boyfriend there with you would make things much more bearable.

And it did. 

It was a fancy event, and seeing Chris all dressed up stirred butterflies in your belly. The white button-up shirt, the tie, the perfectly fitted black suit… He looked absolutely delectable. The only thing you weren’t too fond of was the fact that he’d asked you to straighten his hair. It was fine, he looked dashing as ever, but you just loved his curly hair so much more. 

Even with the eyebrow slit he’d recently gotten, he still looked like he belonged at the event, and being honest, you did, too.

You chose to wear a lovely black dress, strapless, with thigh slits, sheer tights, and heels. The dress hugged your figure pretty much perfectly, and you were one-hundred percent sure of it the second you were going into the event venue, and you felt Chris’ hand on your lower back just as he leaned in to whisper in your ear. ‘Can’t wait ‘til we make it home so I can rip this fucking dress off of you and eat you whole…’

Everything was going fine, you were doing an outstanding job at pretending you cared about anything anyone was saying to you, and Chris, unsurprisingly, had charmed everyone up. As soon as more than two words left his mouth he already had people at his feet, and you honestly couldn’t blame them.

Two whole hours after you arrived you left your boyfriend at the bar to go to the toilet, and when you came back, just like you had predicted, there was someone already chatting him up. It was this girl from your department that hated your guts, and, boy, if you were ready to give her a metaphorical slap in the face.

“Hi, Gina”, there was a polite smile on your face just as you wrapped your arms around Chris’ waist. One of his arms immediately wrapped around your shoulders so he could pull you in to kiss your temple.

Gina was clearly taken aback by your sudden presence, she looked like a gaping fish, and it almost made you laugh.

“Hi, baby. What’re you drinking?”

You directed the question to your boyfriend, who simply handed you his glass. “It’s a mocktail. Try it, pretty”.

“I must say”, Gina started, just as you took a sip of your boyfriend’s fruity drink. “When Chris said he was here with his girlfriend, I didn’t think it’d be you”.

Ah, there it was.

Gina had an excellent way of delivering her messages… In which they’d always sound incredibly diminishing and condescending. You didn’t care much, though. You were used to people like her, so you just brushed it off, like you didn’t even pick up on it. Chris, on the other hand, had gone a bit quiet. The polite smile was gone from his face, and his eyebrows were pulling together the tiniest bit.

“Yep, that’s me”, you replied simply. Chris offered to get you a drink, and you figured a mojito wouldn’t hurt, so you took his offer. He immediately signalled the bartender just as you diverted your attention back to Gina. “You look really beautiful tonight”.

She did. She looked incredibly beautiful in her outfit, so you felt like telling her. Your plan of action with Gina was to kill her with kindness, so you always tried to treat her almost like you treated everybody else–sometimes you did get a bit sarcastic, you’d admit, but it wasn’t the case with your original statement.

Gina forced a smile, and she took a sip of her drink before speaking again. “Likewise. That’s a very revealing dress. You’re really brave for wearing that”.

Of course. A back-handed compliment was always Gina’s way. In her eyes, you were brave for wearing a dress like this one because you were fat, and fat people never felt beautiful or confident enough to wear something that showed skin.

You could now practically feel the anger rolling off of Chris. This could potentially get really ugly, really quickly, so you immediately placed a hand on his chest, stopping whatever it was he was about to say. “I don’t think I understand, Gina. Why am I brave?”

Playing aloof was something that always drove her crazy. You’d lie if you said you didn’t like to do it on purpose. 

Gina blinked a little, and you saw her left eye twitch. “Well… You know…”

“I’m afraid I don’t? This is just how I normally dress for events like these, to be honest with you. So if anything I just feel like I usually do”.

Gina stumbled over her words, mumbling some pathetic excuse before she left altogether, and you finally heaved a sigh of relief as you took the stool she was previously sitting on. Chris’ form relaxed a bit, but you could tell he was still tense.

He thanked the bartender for bringing your drink, and he handed it to you. “What the fuck is that girl’s problem?”

“She just hates me and likes to be annoying about it”, you took a sip of the drink. It wasn’t particularly strong, for which you were grateful. “What was she talking to you about?”

“Honestly? No clue”, Chris took one last swing of his drink, placing the empty glass on the bar right after. “After I introduced myself and noticed she was trying to hit on me, I just stopped listening”.

“Can’t say I blame her for hitting on you”, you chuckled, taking another sip of your drink, placing a hand on your boyfriend’s thigh. “You look absolutely delicious, baby”.

It wasn’t like you liked when people hit on your boyfriend, but you could certainly understand why it happened. Chris was just unfairly handsome. Supernaturally so. Not only that but his entire aura just drew people to him, so at this point you weren’t surprised when someone tried to make a move.

To you, it didn’t matter anyway. Chris was yours, and yours only. Which was something you had absolutely no doubts about. After all, he had made sure to show you time and time again how true that was, so it didn’t make you particularly insecure if people hit on him, it mostly just annoyed you.

A smug smile spread on Chris’ face, and he placed one of his hands on top of yours on his thigh, hiking it further up. “Do I?”

“You do”, you looked him in the eyes as you said it, taking a sip of your drink. Chris’ gaze shifted, to that predator look of his you knew so well, which immediately had the hairs on the back of your neck standing on end.

You crossed one leg over the other. The slit of your dress exposed the skin of your upper thigh, and Chris’ eyes zeroed in on the movement. The tights might as well have not been there. One of the many love bites he’d left on your skin a couple of days ago was perfectly visible below the nylon, exposed only when the slit opened up more than it should probably have.

He stood up from his stool, moving to stand right in front of you, bringing a hand to your hip. Your soft flesh dipped under his tight hold, and you held your breath in anticipation when he leaned in to press a lingering kiss on your cheek before whispering in your ear. “Don’t try to rile me up now, pretty… Not unless you want us to get arrested for public indecency”.

You chuckled, but the way your thighs clenched to ease some of the ache that was quickly building between your legs didn’t go unnoticed. When Chris buried his face in the crook of your neck, brushed your pulse point with his nose, and inhaled deeply, you knew that the smell of your arousal probably didn’t go unnoticed, either.

“Say…” Chris spoke once he finally pulled himself away from your neck. “What if we get the fuck out of here?”

“Took the words right out of my mouth”, was the last thing you told him after you dawned the rest of your drink, before you pressed a brief kiss on his lips.

“Oh, fuck…”

After you and your boyfriend stepped through the door of your home, It took probably less than five seconds for him to push you against it and kiss you breathless.

His suit jacket ungracefully hit the floor when you pushed it off of his frame. You hastily untied his tie to also drop it somewhere on the floor just as he was rolling his sleeves up his arms, not detaching his mouth from yours for a second.

You didn’t even manage to unbutton two buttons of his shirt before he was taking a hold of your hips and turning you around so he could press his crotch to your ass. His lips attached your neck, making you whine, making you grind your ass on the very prominent tent in his trousers. His groans whenever you so much as put pressure on his growing erection would always be one of your favourite sounds in this world.

“Fuck, pretty…” Chris pulled you further against his crotch, just as he pressed kisses on your shoulder. “Can’t fucking believe the audacity of that woman…”

You couldn’t help but laugh. Of course Chris was still angry at Gina, you hadn’t expected any less of him. After all, you were comfortable in your body, but Chris was particularly proud of it himself, so he took these things personal. You supposed it was an instinctual reaction.

Before you knew it, he was on his knees, pushing your dress out of the way and ripping your tights. You gasped, surprised. “Chris!”

“I’ll get you new ones…” He replied simply, just as he attached his lips to your buttcheeks so he could suck and nibble your flesh, so he could leave his mark all over. “Fuck…look at this ass. I’ve been going crazy all night just seeing it in this fucking dress, baby…”

Chris gripped both buttocks tightly in his hands, making you whimper. He let go of them only to land mild smacks on each cheek, holding them again to attempt to soothe the sting. You were sure you were dripping already, and your suspicions were proven correct once your boyfriend pulled your thong to the side and got a good look at your bare centre.

“Shit… Push your hips back a bit more, pretty. Arch your back…”

You did as asked, and immediately, his mouth was on you. You swore, loudly, resting your forehead against the cold door of your flat as Chris lapped you up.

Reaching behind you, you buried your fingers in his hair and gripped him tightly, pushing him further into you with a whine. A low growl resonated from Chris, one of those animalistic growls that had goosebumps raising on your flesh, and his movements sped up with your motions.

Everything was a blur after that. You could only register your boyfriend’s devious tongue on your clit, your slit, your ass, anywhere he could reach. It didn’t take long for him to have you coming, to make your legs tremble as your orgasm raked throughout your body.

As soon as he stood back up from the floor, you turned around and pulled him to you, enveloping him in a sloppy kiss. You felt him fumble with his belt and his trousers, and a groan escaped his lips when you lightly scratched his scalp with your fingernails. 

“Sofa. Now”, Chris mumbled against your mouth, right before he pulled himself away from you and started getting out of his bottoms.

You were taking too long to get to your destination, clearly, because as soon as he was bare from the waist down, he took your hand and pulled you towards the sofa. When he sat down, he tugged on your hand, urging you to straddle him. So you did, right as you cupped his cheeks to pull him in for a fervent kiss.

Chris pulled you as close to him as he could, reaching behind you to further break your tights open. Somehow, your thong got caught in the cross-fire, and you would’ve complained about it had it not turned you on so much. He could break all your clothes, for all you cared.

“Need you inside me. Now”, you mumbled against his mouth between kisses, moaning at the feel of his fingers digging on the supple flesh of your ass, at the feel of his shaft dragging through your folds with every roll of your hips.

“Fuck… Go slow, then, pretty baby…”

You’d gotten better at coaxing your boyfriend into giving you his cock with less prep than he’d usually prefer. You were always fine, you were used to him already, considering how often you had sex, so it hardly ever hurt as long as you did go slow.

Separating your bodies a bit, you took his length in your hand, feeling him throb in your grasp as you gave him a couple of pumps. Chris groaned, throwing his head back, and your mouth watered. Both at the feel of him in your hand, and the sight of him, all dishevelled, desperate for you just like you were desperate for him.

“Fuck, perfect little cunt, huh?” Chris mumbled when you started to sink on his cock. He’d told you before, many times, how perfect he thought your cunt was. ‘It’s like… So plump on the outside, just like the rest of you… But so fucking warm and tight on the inside… Makes me wanna eat it all the time, baby, it really does’.

“Your perfect little cunt, Chris. Yours”, you whispered in his ear, whining once he was fully sheathed within your warmth. “Perfect little cunt for your big, alpha cock. Hm?”

Chris hummed, holding your hips tightly so he could guide you to start moving back and forth, letting your clit deliciously rub against his pubic bone. “Your alpha’s cock, pretty. All for you”.

With trembling hands, you unbuttoned his shirt the rest of the way so you could press your palms against his heated skin while you kissed him.

Chris always made you feel so full. Not only with his monster cock, but also with the undeniable love he had for you. There was just absolutely no doubt in your mind that this werewolf under you loved you with all of him, and, quite honestly, you had no doubt in your mind that you loved him just as much. You hoped he knew.

“I love you so much”, you gasped, rolling your hips harder against him, and his grip on your hips tightened.

If he didn’t know how much you loved him, you’d remind him. You’d remind him as many times as necessary.

“I love you, too”, Chris replied simply, kissing your cheeks, groaning a bit. “Wanna come again like this, baby? Grinding against me with my cock deep inside you?”

You just nodded, burying your face in the crook of his neck to press kisses on his skin, whining, moaning, feeling your mind empty out, leaving nothing but your boyfriend behind.

“Fuck, I want that, too… Want to feel you come around me, and then rail you on this very sofa. Would you let me, pretty? Let me fuck you dumb?”

You nodded again, speeding the movement of your hips, claiming your boyfriend’s mouth in a heated, sloppy kiss to muffle all the sinful sounds coming out of your mouth.

After a while of this, of just kissing and grinding against Chris, when you started to feel the familiar build up of your orgasm in your belly, you felt Chris’ hands move away from your hips. He dragged them all the way down to your thighs, your calves, and back up, squeezing as he went, humming and groaning into your mouth.

“Pretty, these heels… They make your legs look extra scrumptious”, he dragged his short nails over the fabric of your tights–or what was left of them… “Been–fuck… going insane all night”.

“I–I know”, you replied simply, whimpering a bit as you started to grind even harder against his pubic bone. “That’s why I got them… Why I wore them to go out with you tonight”.

Chris laughed at that, throwing his head back and everything. It made you laugh as well, with the only difference between your reactions being that yours ended in a breathless moan as your boyfriend bucked his hips. “I might be the monster here, but you’re certainly the dangerous one, love”.

“Mmm… My dear monster boyfriend…” You were honestly not even making much sense to yourself, but you vaguely noticed Chris’ gaze softening, which somehow had your lower belly tightening further. “Baby, I’m so, so close…”

“Good”, Chris replied simply, kissing you again.

You needed something extra, though. You knew you could come like this soon, but you were craving a bit more stimulation. “Chris?”

“Mm?”

“My tits”, you mumbled against his mouth, and Chris inhaled deeply, detaching himself from you.

“Want me to play with your tits, love?”

As soon as you nodded, Chris was pulling the front of your dress down so he could cup your breasts without barriers. He dragged his fingers over your stiffening nipples, making you roll your hips harder, faster, and mumble a barely audible ‘More…’

It took only a couple of rolls of your nipples between his fingers for you to finally come crashing down, moaning your boyfriend’s name and burying your face in the crook of his neck. Chris just held you close, mumbling words of praise against your hair as he wrapped his arms around your waist.

When you caught your breath enough, you pulled away from his neck, smiling brightly at him and bringing him in for a sweet kiss.

“Feeling okay, my love?” Chris asked, pressing lingering kisses on your cheek.

“Perfect, baby”, you replied simply, melting under the motions of his lips.

“Good. Now, let’s get you out of this thing…”

Chris helped you get out of your dress, and as soon as he’d shrugged his shirt off, you were on all fours on your sofa. Knees firm on the cushions, elbows on the armrest, and your boyfriend right behind you, shoving his werewolf cock time and time again within your sensitive core.

In no time, Chris had you a whimpering, moaning mess again. His hands were everywhere, on your hips or your waist to pull you back to meet each one of his precise thrusts, on your shoulders or the back of your neck to hold you in place, or even digging on the supple flesh of your thighs.

“Can’t believe…some people would even dare imply…” Chris brought a hand to your shoulder, pulling back towards him and wrapping an arm around your waist so his chest could be flush to your back. His lips attached to your neck, eliciting more moans to fall from your mouth. “…that this body of yours is anything less than perfect, fuck… So, so perfect. All mine to enjoy… I’m so fucking lucky…”

His relentless pace had your mind completely disconnected from everything outside of your flat’s walls. It took a moment to register what he was saying, to remember the encounter with your co-worker earlier in the evening. It was so insignificant to you, but it struck a nerve of Chris’, clearly.

Bringing a hand behind you to take a hold of his hair, holding onto the backrest for stability with the other, you started to push your hips back to the best of your capabilities in this position, just as quiet moans spilled freely from your lips. If there was anything you were good at at this point, it was knowing what to say to your boyfriend to calm him down in situations like these.

“All yours, Chris…” Your grip on his hair tightened, his thrusts sped up, and you were honestly on the verge of tears. “My soft body all perfect for you and your puppies, hm?”

“Oh, shit–Fuck, fuck. Gonna blow–”

“Stuff me full, Christopher. Gonna stuff me completely full of your pups, right?” 

His hair tickled your skin when he nodded. One, two, three more thrusts and Chris groaned, filling you to the brim with his cum, panting, borderline growling against the skin of your shoulder. His other arm also wrapped around your waist, keeping you close to his body, and you immediately relaxed in his hold.

“Your…” Chris started speaking, a bit breathless. “Your soft body all perfect for me and our puppies…”

You giggled at that, feeling yourself flush.

“Get back on your elbows, pretty…”

You did as asked, lowering yourself again. Chris pulled out, and his cum started leaking from your now swollen hole. You heard him swear, barely a whisper before he started wiping you clean.

“I don’t mean to sound ungrateful, but I seriously hope you’re not using my black dress to wipe your cum off of me”.

Chris laughed, and he asked you to lay on your back. That was when you noticed it wasn’t your dress, but his shirt he’d used.

“‘Course not, silly”, he started untying your heels to get them off. What was left of your tights came off after, finally leaving you completely bare.

Chris hovered over you for a second, pressing a brief kiss on your lips before he snuggled closer, laying his head on your chest. “I love how you look in that dress, wouldn’t want to ruin it…”

You hummed, burying your fingers in his hair, massaging his scalp. The tips of his hair had started to curl again from his sweat, and it made you smile.

“You looked incredibly handsome tonight, baby…” You couldn’t help but compliment him, kissing the top of his head. “You always do, but tonight especially…”

Chris kissed your chest, finding his way to your neck to lick and kiss your pulse point as well. “And you looked gorgeous, love”.

After a while of cuddles, of a comfortable silence spent catching your breaths, Chris shuffled down your body, kissing his way all the way down to your tummy where he placed loud, lingering kisses there before he stood up from the sofa altogether. He scooped you in his arms, and pressed a brief kiss on your lips, making you giggle.

You found yourselves in your bathroom seconds after, where your boyfriend started drawing a bath while he dropped the words you’d been waiting for all night. ‘Okay, I need you to tell me who was who tonight. I need to put faces to all this office gossip you’ve been telling me for months, baby, or I won’t be able to sleep tonight…’

© therhythmafterthesummer 2023. all rights reserved. do not repost or translate my stories.

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[sithwitch13]

AEW Dynamite

-200 baby! Gonna watch the very first one maybe tomorrow. Still the only one I haven't seen.

-COLOR POOFS

-strangely emotional about tunnels (this is not a sex thing)

-i don't care if Garcia is a heel or face so long as he remains a bitchy little dance boy who makes me smile

-oops the retrospective video made me cry

-2.0 sticking up for their son 💜

-RVD!!! I spent the weekend trying to talk a former-ECW-fan friend into watching AEW and this may have sealed that

-LET'S GO VIOLENT GREG

-lmfao Excalibur's panicked "TAZ, YOU CAN'T!"

-how we doing blood perverts

-TRENT WON!!!!!

-BCC VS BEST FRIENDS PARKING LOT FIGHT YESSS

-missed opportunity to have Chuck say shit

-MJF getting cheers and speaking up for all us RSD folks, thank youuuuu

-the eventual Adam Cole turn is gonna be HEARTBREAKING

-Cole has trust issues from that one time his friends murdered him

-ah dammit the All In match announcement made me cry. Dude went from not being sure if he'd be allowed back in the ring to main eventing.

-oh shit Roddy having a breakdown

-The Elite are just so good at mixing amazing matches with Loony Tunes-esque comic timing.

-give me all the AR Fox thank you

-this segment is succeeding in getting me more interested in Nick Wayne as a character and not just as kid who is great at wrestling, also so good at continuing Swerve's villain story

-me, to my spouse: "so that is Mark Davis and his dumptruck ass."

-WOMEN MAIN EVENT YESSSSS

-SHIDA GETS TO BE CHAMPION IN FRONT OF CROWDS!!!!!!!

[ecoamerica]

Watch the American Climate Leadership Awards 2024 now: https://youtu.be/bWiW4Rp8vF0?feature=shared

The American Climate Leadership Awards 2024 broadcast recording is now available on ecoAmerica's YouTube channel for viewers to be inspired by active climate leaders. Watch to find out which finalist received the $50,000 grand prize! Hosted by Vanessa Hauc and featuring Bill McKibben and Katharine Hayhoe!

[bluebellhairpin]

Names for Them, and for You

Attack on Titan X Reader

A/N: Yeah yeah, this is just headcanons that most will ignore not see but oml I can’t believe the audacity Zeke had to get me writing a smidge for him again smh. He has zero shame. ALSO, I’m trying out a new format, so hopefully y’all like the possible change! - Nemo

Warnings: A little suggestive. Manga and Anime spoilers. Language. 

Listening to: ‘Rasputin’ by Boney M (slowed) 

Masterlist

Levi Ackerman

He calls You; It’s mostly just your name, or a variant of you name (nickname). However, if he’s feeling soft, or he want something (as if he wouldn’t get it anyway) he might call you sweetheart. 

You call Him; Call him anything other than his name and he’ll drop-kick you. On good days, when you’re both alone, you might get away with calling him my captain. 

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Zeke Jaeger

He calls You; This man is a firm believer in pet names. But in the weirdest ways possible. Called you bread roll once, and then like an hour later he called you my stars. So idk man, pick and choose. 

You call Him; Chimney, because he smokes. Missing link, because of his titan form. And blondie, because of his hair. 

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Reiner Braun

He calls You; Baby. No questions asked, no further comment. 

You call Him; Send baby right back at him and he’d probably melt. Mans can dish out, but mans cannot receive. Also hunk ,,, just because we all know he do be built different. 

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Erwin Smith

He calls You; Anything and everything - especially if no one else is around. His personal favorites, however, include darling, my beloved, and (yeah like Levi) sweetheart. 

You call Him; HONEY HONEY, HOW HE THRILLS ME - he loves being called honey, and every time you call him it he just gets this look in his eyes. All soft and loving. ‘honey, I’m home’ anyone? 

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Miche Zacharias

He calls You; A n g e l. Because you are his angel, and he can’t believe how lucky he is to have you! (and he’s a huge romantic so.) 

You call Him; King. Call him king. It’s what he deserves. No I will not elaborate - if you don’t know then too bad - but if you do know then you deserve my respect.

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Jean Kirschtien

He calls You; Classic ones like babe, and love. If he’s feeling romantic, or soft, he’ll pick up my love, and tbh it’s very cute to hear him say it first thing in the morning. 

You call Him; Call him your man or a variant of it, and he’ll burst with pride like ‘yeah, hear that? I’m their man’. 

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Eren Jaeger

He calls You; He only ever uses older names for you. Sugar, darling, doll, those kinds. He does like sugar most, he draws it out too. Ugh. 

You call Him; He’d probably persuade you to call him daddy. He likes it, and unfortunately unless you’re calling him by his name he wont answer to anything else. Smh. 

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Armin Arlert

He calls You; Sunshine is the main one, and coming from him it’s gotta always put a bright smile on your face. He also calls you beloved, dearest,  and low key also seashell. 

You call Him; You called him apparition once as a joke, because he ‘died’, and it’s a kind of running gag now. But by all and any means, call him baby boy and see what that does. 

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Connie Springer

He calls You; Dumptruck because of dat ass. He’d be one of those boyfriends who’d call you bruh no matter what gender you are. But I think also maybe sweetie could be something he’d call you too.

You call Him; Hot shot, ‘cause we all know he’s a bit like that, and we love him for it. But if you’re both having a moment, and you call him babe or angel eyes, he’ll want to just scoop you up and love you, so call him that please. 

───────✱.｡:｡✱.:｡✧.｡✰✧.｡:✱───────

Kenny Ackerman

He calls You; He calls you pretty thing very often. But he can be nicer and calls you sweetcheeks instead - because he likes kissing your cheeks. uwu

You call Him; Teasingly call him old man please. I can imagine, despite how mean it can sound, I can imagine him loving the nature of it. It’s one of those relationships with a fair amount of banter. 

[daggerzine]

Celebrity Mixtape Party #1 with Steve Michener (Volcano Suns, Dumptruck, Big Dipper) Part 1

Steve (far left with Big Dipper) 

Mixtapes. They're back! Or maybe they never went away? What happens when you make a mixtape for someone who MAKES music? And then they talk about that mixtape? Well, dear reader, let's find out in..

Okay!  First song. Side A. So I'll give my impressions and then we can talk about the song. Okay? Then the reveal, when appropriate.

Sexy

Thanks for this tape, Matthew, I've really been enjoying it.  However, I gotta say the first song is my least favorite.

What is it pray tell

I don't know but I usually love that style of song.  Very Love/Byrds-y but there was something cloying about that hook of 'Let's Get Together'

Oh yes. Justin Trouble.

Can't tell if it's authentic 60's pop or revival

Early '80s. He was friends with Johnny Thunders.New York City area guy

Never heard of him but I'm not inspired to search him up. Too many words.

Aw man he's just riffing

Anything you wanna say in his defense?

I mean I could. I think that song and the whole record is genius. To me it's the very essence of rock and roll.

Okay, maybe that's just one song that I wouldn't like. I'll check it out. I know you love your 60s stuff  but to me it's just too twee. But if you were using this as a "courtship tape", the relationship is over.

Since we can't "get together" on that song?

Courtship tape. I think they were called love mixes back in the day my friend.

I'm older than you. We used to bring them and play them in the parlor. So this second song is right up my Alley. Great guitar sound, great drummer.  I love that it's poppy but it takes a minor key/dissonant turn when he sings the tagline 'Solid Gold'. Kind of a Fall vibe to that hook.

So what is that second song?

Boston band....Real Kids...1974 demo...EARLY REAL KIDS

I knew you'd get a Real Kids song on there but that is very 'Unreal' real kids.  Sounds like they were way ahead of their time

Yeah. That song is unhinged. Nothing twee about it.

Amazing band.  I would have maybe guessed that but that chorus is so left field.  If I knew about that song back then, I would have had the band cover it. Real Kids sounding like the Fall. They should have been as big as the Ramones.  Worse drug and ego problems I guess.

To me it sounds like The Dolls. A little bit of Glam in there.

I saw them a few times at the Rat.  Always a reliable live band. I hear the 60's thing in there but that turnaround into the chorus is at least 5 years ahead of its time. I need to hear more of those demos.

It's on vinyl.

Next song- One thing that I know about you is that you love your 60s stuff.  This sounds like an authentic acid rock band. Roky?

I don't have the tracklist

Ah, okay.  It's by Girl Trouble-"Storm Warning'. Don't know them but I love the song.

The pride of Bellingham

Kind of like the Seeds meet Nick Cave. What year?

1993 on Empty

Love the sax and guitar interplay at the end.  Wow. I would have placed that in 1965

Yeah except for the production. I think he's one of the Great rock and roll vocalists of the '90s

Yeah, great singer.  Are they still around or mutate into something else?

Kurt Kendall. No, I don't think they really play around much anymore. There was a reunion show not too long ago but I missed it.

Great stuff, I'll check it out. Next song? Okay, this one I knew from the first note--the great NRBQ. The greatest rock and roll band ever, at least in this incarnation.

Green Lights?

Yes.

I saw them around this time with the WW Horns, opening for Thorogood.

Another great vocalist

I didn't appreciate them back then cuz I was too into the alternative scene (tho still loved GT) but when I saw them in the 80's I was amazed.

This is a band that should have played the bar band in every '80s movie ever made

Exactly.  they were my template for 'a band'

That's Joey singing that one? favorite bass player ever, favorite drummer ever.

I'm not entirely sure what that guitar is in the solo. Sounds almost like a pedal steel or something.

Big Al could make anything sound like anything.  Genius band. Shoulda been huge.

The YouTube comments say Joey.

Yeah, Joey wrote the hits. Like most bass players.

Lol. The album is called nrbq at Yankee stadium and it's funny because the picture shows an empty Yankee stadium with them far away in the bleachers...a play on words...clever

I see.

I'll explain humor to you another time.

Make me a 'humor' mixtape

Okay next song

The 5th song on side A is called Buried Alive.  A 3 chord slab of brilliance.  Sounds like another Boston Band.  More Real Kids?

Hmmm

Should I peek?

It could be Avenged Sevenfold. Yes peek.

Oh no, it's the Nervous Eaters!  Born to Die.  I thought he was singing Buried Alive.

Ahhh!!

I knew it was Boston, can't believe I missed the Eaters.  Loved that band.

Another Boston band you didn't ID! You are 0 for 2

I wrote down it was "the Lyres without keyboards" so I get half credit.

Okay so one of the cool things about this band is it had one of the Paley Brothers. Who never did anything this "heavy" outside of this band?

I had their singles and saw them live a few times.  They were great. Just Head is a classic.

The major label debut was a bit of a disaster:  slick production, terrible cover art. I swore that I'd never let that happen to any band that I was in.

This song for some reason reminds me of Judas Priest.

I thought Saints at first but Priest would work

Next song?

Ok

This is one that I will probably miss too. Sounds VERY familiar and my first guess is Rockpile/Brinsley Schwarz.  "I'll have another drink and then I tried to crawl out the door.."

"I never did know a thing about it." It's got that Nick Lowe/Dave Edmunds vibe.

Take a peek

Status Quo-Lies

Ah yes

Wow, I don't think of SQ sounding like this. This is pub rock, I thought they were harder

Very boogie

Don't you get the Rockpile thing tho?

Oh absolutely

Great song.  I'd cover this. Was it a hit?

That status quo song is from 1980. I think so. They did it on Top of the Pops

Good. I'd be depressed if a song that great didn't get an audience.

Agreed

Next?

Yes

I also don't know this and I'm not sure what the hook is but it sounds like what I imagine the Muffs sound like. Be my baby.?  Sneering female vocals, 3 chords, loud guitars.

Fastbacks - Read my Letters

Yeah, another band I completely missed out on.  From the PNW?

Seattle

I've seen them quite a few times and they were always amazing. Big fan.

I'm sorry I missed them live. I don't care much for this song but I'll bet it sounded good in a sweaty club.

Ok

Did you like the Muffs?

Not really. I mean I respect them a lot but they never resonated with me. I think Kurt Bloch is a great lyricist. And I love that he didn't sing his own lyrics.

Wait, that was a guy singing?

No. The guitar player Kurt wrote the lyrics for most of their songs.

Got it.  So he left them to join YFF?

He did both simultaneously. Kim Warnick is the singer and bass player.

Too talented.

Definitely.

I saw the Fellows quite a few times also.

They opened for us in Seattle in 1990. I loved them but, as an east coaster, had never seen them.

Also amazing one of my favorites. During that time that both the Fastbacks and the Young Fresh Fellows were active it made me envy Seattle because Portland didn't have bands like those bands.

This is a different convo, but Seattle is a much more rockin town than Portland.

Full disclosure in the '90s I was not a fan of Portland's music scene. But I did like Hazel.

They were so cute!

Alright, let's not get distracted!   Next song I recognized easily , though I may not have a few years ago.  This is Sparks - Something For The Girl Who Has Everything. Brilliant band but one that I missed out on until recently

You know I never introduced you at the beginning of all this. Dear readers, I am discussing a mixtape with our esteemed guest Steve Michener from Skid Row.

Skid Row UK, legally. Not to be confused with those dorks from Hollyweird. Michael Cudahy was my roommate back in the day and he was way into them. I could never get past the vocals.Recently though, I have come to appreciate them and now I am a big fan.

I love the vocals. It's its own thing. Who is this Michael you speak of?

Michael was in Christmas at the time and then started Combustible Edison.  Now he does movie soundtracks.

Have you ever seen the video of Ron Mael singing karaoke to a Sparks song?

No, I'll google it.

Next song?

Ok

Well, I didn't recognize the song itself but it's hard to miss the unique guitar sound of The Wedding Present-The Boy Can Wait

Fastest wrist in the west

Trademark double strum. They're one of those bands that I just love the sound of but never bought any records.

That's a Peel session by the way.

They were around last year but I failed to attend.

I like the lyrics. They're clever. Kind of misanthropic but not in a Morrissey way. More humorous.

I'm not a lyric guy but I do love a good Morrisey couplet

The dude could pen a tune

Stephen I mean

Moz

The Moz

Himself.

He should pull a Prince and just change his name to Himself

Next song is one that you would never get past me, tho I'm 0-2 with Boston bands before this.  Heading into a Boston binge here.

Ok. Just another band out of Boston

I was the world's biggest Peter Dayton fan for years.  I moved to Boston the week that LaPeste broke up so I never got to see them.  So I made up for that by seeing every PD gig for years. 'She's a Girl' by LaPeste, probably one of the best bands out of Boston ever.

I like how evil La Peste sound. They sound like they carried shivs.

It means "the pest"

Perfect

"la" is "the" in french

Waow

I don't know if you knew that. Anyway, this must have been an Ocasek demo?  Sounds like they were trying to go pop. I had a live tape of them from the rock and roll rumble in 1979 that I wore out. Just a great pop punk band. Next song is also LaPeste- Die in My Sleep.Ric got involved with them later in their career and produced some demos.  Or maybe it was Greg Hawkes.  But Ocasek worked with him solo for a few years.  Dayton's EP, which came out the same time as Panorama by the Cars. It's a fun record.Better off Dead is an amazing single.

I'll check out solo Dayton.

Jim Janota on bass. I think he was in some of those early boston punk bands

But Ric was the producer guy then . Alan Vega etc

Yeah, Ocasek was cool.  He had Dayton's band open for The Cars at the Boston Garden.  Big supporter of smaller bands.

Next two songs had me stumped. I just wrote 'Sex Pistols'.

I would never put a sex pistols song on anything ever. But I do love a lot of things that Cook and Jones were on later

This just has a Pistols energy and sneer. Hey Hey! Hey Hey!

Hmm

3 chords, English. Fall-like but harder.

Not ringing any bells

Ha! I looked at the list--Naked Raygun-Roller Queen.

Yes

"trying" to be british

Nooo

I tuned this band out early.  Not my cup of tea.

I love the Raygun. Midwest thing

Just like Soul Asylum.  I was (and remain) a judgemental asshole when it comes to music.

Hard. Arty. Humorous.

I lump them together.  Prejudice.  But this is why I like the idea of listening to the tape blind.

Throb Throb is fantastic

It can blow up my preconceived notions  or reinforce them. I know they were hugely popular in the scene and it's probably my loss that I didn't explore their stuff. I was probably reacting negatively to the Big Black thing.  Lots of competition and jealousy-fuelled listening bias.

Eh no biggy. I never really liked Big Black. To me they were great in theory but not in practice.

I prefer Shellac

Great band

But i think BD covered 'Bazooka Joe'. Not my idea.

There was another Chicago band from that time that I like a lot called Breaking Circus.

Yes, I liked Breaking Circus.  We played with them.

Yay

Next song. 60s sounding psychedelia

Ok

Didn't recognize it, but liked it. reverby guitar,

Hmm

La Luz- I Want to Be Alone. Cool sound.  What's their story?

Ah. Seattle. Then moved to LA. 4 women. On Hardly Art (label). Started in 2012. They have three lps. Saw them at The Aladdin.

Short but sweet. I'll check them out.

Very very good band

I like good bands

No bad songs. They were VERY GOOD live. Jealous of the drummer's speed and dexterity. They play with a lot of feeling.

If we ever get to see live music again, I'll check them out.

You need to.

Next song is a classic Boston number called 'No Place Like Home' by The Neighborhoods. Such a great power pop song. B-side to Prettiest Girl, which was probably the biggest indie single of the time in Boston.  That and Academy Fight Song. Both on Ace of Hearts records

Oh really? Nice that I got airplay in Boston. I mean it. I didn't get any airplay in Boston

Yes, it was huge! (sorry about your lack of airplay)  top song on WBCN, the local rock station. They should have been huge-they had it all.  Cute guys, great songs, amazing live show. I woulda bet on them

Despite looking like a reggae album I've read good reviews with their first LP. The thing with a lot of these bands is they're from a time when there were regional scenes period and if they didn't make the jump to Major label then a lot of what they were about might have been lost on people outside of their scene

Honestly, I don't remember that LP at all.  Maybe I had dropped them and moved onto hipper stuff. They were kind of a high school crush for me. They got progressively more hard rock as time went on. Yes, probably a common theme with local bands. Some focused on getting a 'deal' and making it big.  Thank god for labels like Homestead, who gave smaller bands a chance to make mistakes and grow

If you had any anecdotes about any of these guys share away.

Anecdotes? I do

'dote away

Dave and Lee worked at Harrington's Liquor, the biggest booze shop in Allston and were always in there when I went to buy cheap vodka. Then, one day, they were fired. Word was that they tried to lift some expensive champagne from the shop to celebrate a record release party or something.  They were both dating members of Salem 66 at the time and Dave married Judy.  They were very nice guys.

Lee?

Lee Harrington, Beth's brother was their bassist in the late 80's. Beth Harrington was in Jonathan's band.

That's a good anecdote.

Jonathan?

Richman

Oh I thought I recognized her voice from Jonathan Richmond records. She was a backup singer. She had kind of a classically trained sounding voice

Yes, her and Ellie Marshall. Beth married my old roommate, whose girlfriend when I knew him, left him for Steve Forbert.

Ellie Marshall was related to who?

Something related to Paley Bros. It'll come to me.  Barry Marshall.

The next song is the Office Supply song. Swivel Chair. I don't recognize the song but it's gotta be something like Fountains of Wayne or Weezer.

Nothing Painted Blue

Oops. Hope they aren't insulted!  I kinda knew of NPB but obviously didn't get into their stuff.  Sounds like a certain pop band from Boston in the late 80s. Where were they from?

Franklin Bruno. Great songwriter in my opinion. Great band. LA

Oh, I know Franklin.  Of course.  I confuse them with that band from Boise

Franklin bears a slight passing resemblance to Bill? Cool that you know Franklin.

Well, on FB at least.  Very nice guy.  He's probably gonna unfriend me if he reads this.

I can edit it out. Celebrity mixtapes is about bringing people together, not about fighting.

No, it's fine.  It's part of the process. I'll take my lumps.

Ok

I just thought it was a little bit of a novelty song.

I just think it's adorably nebbishy

Not that we didn't veer close to that sometimes. It's a risk when you are trying to write songs that have humor in them.

Singing about office supplies. One of my favorite things about Big Dipper is you guys never crossed over into parody even though you were slyly funny.

Yeah, it def sounds like something I would write. I was an office supply nerd.

Maybe I sensed that. Dilbert Rock

Thanks. It's a fine line between clever and stupid, as the Tap says. Anyway, super catchy but maybe a little too clever for me.

NEXT!

Next song has to be Scrawl. Apple of his Eye.

Nope

Very Gang of Four with female vocals.

I did like Scrawl back in the day though. Bratmobile-Queenie.

Ah, well they should write a check to Sue and Marcy. Sounds like early Scrawl. Catchy song but a little derivative to my ears.

Yeah Scrawl predates the Bratmobile.By a few years.

You could steal from worse.

True

Scrawl were an amazing band.

Pride of Columbus

Really had the goods live and on record.

Never saw them live unfortunately.I always thought they were on Homestead but it turns out no.

You had your Homestead goggles on.

"I like everything that comes out on Homestead..."

Well that was me back then too

Last song on side A.  Permanent Wave.  No idea who it is, a short, catchy, new wave song.  Mo-dettes?

I do like the Mo-Dettes but no.

Oh Ok. From Athens

Ah!  i had their single, was this on it?

Michael Stipe's sister

Sister of Stipe

Matthew Sweet was in the band for a minute too, later on.

I bought it, I think, cuz I thought I could resell it when rem got famous. Retirement investment

I think the single and the lp are both amazing

Kind of twee, to revisit a theme

The lp is not as twee

That song sounds a little thin

I like the production. it sounds live.

I see that. Okay, I've gotta run.  This was fun.

Ok. Thanks for doing it.

https://www.mixcloud.com/matthewkenneth9/steve-michener-mix-pt-1/?fbclid=IwAR2hhMS8KXo51QjlpJ__ANfdmKY3Ux7vRyIqHHOxGfY_UK4H6tz6vIXyaxE

[ghostingtheinternet]

I posted 28,045 times in 2021

17 posts created (0%)

28028 posts reblogged (100%)

For every post I created, I reblogged 1648.7 posts.

I added 21 tags in 2021

#nftumblcryptids - 3 posts

#toh - 2 posts

#the owl house - 2 posts

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#the owl house season 2 - 2 posts

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#the magnus archives - 2 posts

#tma - 2 posts

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Longest Tag: 109 characters

#the first one i ever remember seeing is space jam on an old tv when my family was out trying to buy a new one

My Top Posts in 2021

#5

Diversity win! The Dalmatians that pushed your mom off a cliff are gay!

25 notes • Posted 2021-05-30 05:30:47 GMT

#4

I’m gonna be brave. I’m gonna say it. Martin and Jon have absolute DUMPTRUCK asses. How else would they save the world? How else could they murder Elias? I’m sorry but it is JUST not adding UP honey. They WALKED through the ENTIRE fearscape, that’s gonna build SOMETHING back there. Case closed... all of you assless Jon stans dont have rights and assless Martin stans never had rights to begin with

45 notes • Posted 2021-03-31 19:41:59 GMT

#3

So the new episode of The Owl House, huh?

Hunter is my son now. When I was a kid, I would’ve simped over him so hard, but now that I’m old, it’s just alllll the maternal instincts.

Son boy. Baby. Baby son boy. If anything ever happened to him, I’d kill belos and then kikimora and then myself.

84 notes • Posted 2021-07-17 22:07:42 GMT

#2

In response to some recent Loki posts I’ve seen:

I am a bi woman with a preference for men. I understand where people are coming from when they say that Loki and Sylvie both being bi and in a m/f relationship felt extremely validating. But you need to understand: people are not angry at that pairing BECAUSE they are both bi and in a m/f relationship (and if some are, fuck them). They’re angry because Disney would rather put a self-cest relationship between two characters that literally have the same family and genetic makeup than have an mlm relationship on screen. They’re angry because the relationship was so clearly forced by execs because boy on screen + girl on screen must always equal romance, even if they have negative amounts of romantic chemistry. They’re angry because the opportunity for the first mlm relationship in marvel history was ripped away so that they could claim they gave us representation (from lines that, while they mean the world to us, were clearly written to be easily missable for conservative viewers) without ACTUALLY having to represent the parts of us they think will stir up a fuss.

I get why you’re angry; I do. I’m so tired of feeling like I’m somehow less queer because I love men and have the option to pass as straight. But this is not the representation you want. This is scraps. Borderline Incestuous, forced-by-corporate scraps. We deserve better. We will demand better - and if we do not get better, we will make it better ourselves.

117 notes • Posted 2021-07-15 02:50:24 GMT

#1

Hey, in light of all this shit coming out about Dan, remember to not shame people or look down on them for enjoying Game Grumps before these allegations- and you know what? That goes for every franchise that gets fucked over because of a bad person(s), actually. I see so many times when another person gets called out, people are so quick to go “oh, y’all REALLY still liked them in 2021? I knew they were problematic BEFORE this, losers!” And honestly, that’s so stupid and petty. Not everyone is at your level, stop looking down on fans who didn’t know before.

And while we’re at it, stop treating people like they’re stupid for being upset or disappointed when someone they like is called out. Twitter is ablaze with “stop stanning people, that parasocial relationship is so toxic!” And yes, at a fundamental level they’re right, but so many people are misusing that language to tell people “Stop enjoying/looking up to *insert person here*, anyone who does is so stupid!” and that’s... beyond frustrating. People are allowed to like and look up to Markiplier and Jacksepticeye and all creators, that’s what they’re there for! The problem comes when there is unhealthy obsession, which is, btw, what those words are actually meant to refer to. I’m so tired of Twitter misusing terms and stretching out their actual meaning. Let people be disappointed, let people look up to others, and stop misusing actual terms for real problems before I come up there and wrestle your ass off that high horse myself.

1242 notes • Posted 2021-03-22 01:00:14 GMT

Get your Tumblr 2021 Year in Review →

[smolsquish-blog]

Lyrics To My Favorite Songs From Heathers OwO

Our Love Is God: 

JD: They made you cry. 

But that will end tonight. 

You are the only thing that’s right 

About this broken world. 

Go on and cry. 

But when the morning comes 

We’ll burn it down and then 

We’ll build the world again. 

Our love is God. 

Veronica: Are you okay? 

JD: I was alone. 

I was a frozen lake 

But then you melted me. 

See now I’m crying too. 

You’re not alone. 

Veronica: You’re not alone. 

JD: And when the morning comes. 

Veronica: When the morning comes... 

JD: We’ll burn away that tear. 

And raise our city here. 

Veronica: Raise our city here. 

JD and Veronica: Our love is God. 

(Veronica calls Kurt) 

Kurt: Yellow? 

Veronica: Hi Kurt. It’s Veronica. How did you know that it was always a fantasy of mine to have two guys at once? 

Kurt: Eh...Lucky Guess? 

Veronica: Well, if you want to come true, meet me at the cemetery. At dawn. 

Kurt: Free pussy. 

Ram: And we don’t even have to buy it a pizza! 

Kurt: Punch it in! Woah, haahahaha! 

JD: We can start and finish wars. 

JD and Veronica: We’re what killed the dinosaurs! 

We’re the asteroid that’s overdue! 

The dinosaurs choked on the dust.

They died because God said they must. 

The new world needed room for me and you... 

JD: I worship you. 

I’d trade my life for yours. 

They all will disappear. 

We’ll plant our garden here. 

Our love is God. x2

Veronica: Our love is God. x2

Veronica: Woah, is that real? 

JD: Yeah. But we’re filling it with “ich luge”* bullets. 

Veronica: Ich luge...What? 

JD: My granddad scored them in World War Two. They contain a powerful tranquilizer. The Nazis used them to fake their own suicides when the Russians invaded Berlin. WE will use them to knock out Kurt and Ram just long enough to make it look like a suicide pact. Complete with a forged suicide note.  

Kurt and Ram: Ram and I died because we had to hide our gay forbidden love from a disapproving world. 

JD: And when the morning comes they’ll both be laughing stocks! 

JD and Veronica: So let’s go hunt some jocks!

Kurt: Heh...Ehem. Hi...Veronica. 

Ram: So do we just like whip it out or what? 

Veronica: Oh! Take it slow Ram. Strip for me. 

Kurt and Ram: Oh? Okaaaay! Hahahah. What about you?  Veronica: Well I was hoping you could rip my clothes off me, sport. 

Kurt and Ram: We can do that! 

Veronica: On the count of three. 

Kurt, Ram and Veronica: 1...2... 

JD: 3. 

(JD and Veronica kill Ram) 

Kurt: Holy crap! 

JD: Stay there I’ll get him. Kurt? Kurt?! 

Kurt: You killed my best friend! Why are you chasing me?!

Veronica: Ram? Ram you’re just unconscious right Ram? Ram? Ram?!

JD: Get off the fence, get off the damn fence! 

Kurt: I DON’T UNDERSTAND! 

JD: We can start and finish wars. 

We’re what killed the dinosaurs. 

We’re the asteroid that’s overdue. 

Kurt: Stop being a dick! 

JD: The dinosaurs choked on the dust 

They died because we said they must. 

(JD kills Kurt) 

Veronica: What the FUCK have you done?! 

JD: I worship you. 

I’d trade my life for yours. 

They all will disappear. 

We’ll plant our garden here... 

Our love is God. 

Our love is God. 

Our love is God. 

Our love is God. 

Veronica: Our love is God!  JD: Our love is God. 

Veronica: Our love is God. 

JD: Our love is God! 

(End) *Ich Luge means I’m lying in German. 

Seventeen: 

Veronica: Fine, we’re damaged. 

Really damaged. 

But that does not make us wise. 

We’re not special. 

We’re not different. 

We don’t choose who lives or dies! 

Let’s be normal. 

See bad movies.  Sneak a beer and watch TV. 

We’ll bake brownies 

Or go bowling 

Don’t you want a life with me? 

Can’t we be seventeen? 

That’s all I want to do. 

If you could let me in 

I could be good for you. 

People hurt us. 

JD: Or they vanish. 

Veronica: And you’re right it really blows. 

But we let go 

JD:Take a deep breath 

Veronica: Then go buy some Summer clothes. 

We’ll go camping. 

JD: Play some poker. 

Veronica: And we’ll eat some chili fries. 

Maybe prom night... 

JD: Maybe dancing... 

Veronica: Don’t stop looking in my eyes! 

JD: Your eyes!  Veronica and JD: Can’t we be seventeen? 

That’s all I want to do. 

If you could let me in 

I could be good for you. 

Let us be seventeen 

If we’ve still got the right. 

Veronica: So what’s it gonna be? 

I wanna be with you. 

JD: I wanna be with you. 

Veronica: Wanna be with you. 

Veronica and JD: Be with you tonight!  Veronica: Yeah, we’re damaged. 

JD: Badly damaged. 

Veronica and JD: But your love’s too good to lose. 

Veronica: Hold me tighter... 

JD: Even closer. 

Veronica: I’ll stay if I’m what you choose. 

JD: Can’t we be seventeen? 

Veronica: If I am what you choose. 

JD: If we still have the right... 

Veronica: Cause you’re the one I choose... 

JD: You’re the one I choose... 

Veronica and JD: You’re the one I choose... 

(END) 

Kindergarten Boyfriend: 

Martha: There was a boy I knew in Kindergarten. 

He was sweet, he said I was smart. 

He was good at sports, and people liked him. 

And at naptime once, we shared a mat. 

I didn’t sleep, I sat and watched him breathing. 

Watched him dream for nearly half an hour. 

Then he woke up. 

He pulled a scab off one time playing kickball. 

Kissed me quick and pressed it in my hand. 

I took that scab and put it in a locket 

All year long I wore it near my heart. 

He didn’t care if I was thin or pretty. 

And he was mine until we hit 1st grade. 

Then he woke up. 

Last night I dreamed a horse with wings 

Flew down into my homeroom. 

On its back there he sat 

And he held out his arms. 

So we sailed above the gym 

Across the faculty parking lot. 

My kindergarten boyfriend and I... 

(And a horse with wings.) 

Now we’re all grown up and we know better. 

We recognize the way things are. 

Certain boys are just for kindergarten. 

Certain girls are meant to be alone. 

But I believe any dream worth having 

Is a dream that should not have to end. 

So I’ll build a dream that I can live in. 

And this time I’m never waking up... 

And we’ll soar above the trees! 

Over cars and croquet lawns! 

Past the church and the lake! 

And the tri-county mall! 

We will fly through the dawn 

To a new kindergarten! 

Where naptime is centuries long... 

(END) 

Meant To Be Yours: 

JD: All is forgiven baby! Come out, get dressed, you’re my date to the pep-rally tonight!

You dumped me out like I was trash 

For that you should be dead! 

But, but, but 

Then it hit me like a flash. 

What if highschool went away instead? 

Those assholes are the key! 

They’re keeping you away from me! 

They made you blind 

Messed up your mind, but I can set you free! 

You left me and I fell apart 

I punched the wall and cried 

“BAM BAM BAM.” 

Then I found you, changed my heart. 

And set loose all that truthful shit inside. 

And so I built a bomb! 

Tonight our school is Vietnam! 

We’ll guarantee they’ll never see their senior prom! 

I was meant to be yours...

We were meant to be one...

Don’t give up on me now. 

Finish what we begun. 

I was meant to be yours...

We were meant to be one...

Don’t give up on me now.

Finish what we begun.

So when the highschool gym goes BOOM! 

With everyone inside- 

Pew pew pew! 

In the rubble of their tomb 

We’ll plant this note explaining why they died! 

“We the students of Westerburg High will die! 

Our burned bodies may finally get through 

To you. 

Your society turns out slaves and blanks, 

No thanks. 

Signed the students of Westerburg High, 

Goodbye.”  We’ll watch the smoke pour out the doors, 

Bring marsh mellows we’ll make s’mores!

We can smile and cuddle while the fire roars! 

I was meant to be yours...

We were meant to be one...

I can’t take it alone.

Finish what we begun.

You were meant to be mine! 

I am all that you need! 

You carved open my heart! 

Can’t just leave me to bleed! 

Veronica open the, open the door please. Veronica open the door. Veronica can we not fight anymore, please. Can we not fight anymore? Veronica sure you’re scared, I’ve been there! I can set you free! Veronica don’t make me come in there- I’m gonna count to three! 1...2...-Fuck It!

Oh my God... No. Veronica! Please don’t leave me alone...You were all I could trust. I can’t do this alone. Still I will if must! 

Veronica’s mom: Veronica? I brought you a snack. Veronica? AHHH! 

(END) 

Yo Girl: (last one I swear) 

Heather Duke: Martha dumptruck took a belly flop off the Old Mill Bridge last night holding a suicide note. 

Veronica: Oh my God. Is she dead? 

Heather Duke: Just some broken bones. Just another geek trying to imitate the popular people and failing miserably.

Heather Chandler, Ram and Kurt: Yo Girl, keep it together. I knew you would come far. Now you’re truly a Heather. Smell how gangster you are. 

Veronica: Martha I’m so sorry... 

Heather Chandler, Ram and Kurt: Yo Girl, feel a bit punchy? She’s not looking so well. Still you earned that red scrunchie. Come join Heather in Hell. 

Veronica’s dad: Where have you been? 

Veronica’s mom: We’ve been worried sick! Your friend JD stopped by and told us everything. 

Veronica: Everything? 

Veronica’s Dad: Your depression? Your thoughts of suicide? 

Veronica’s Mom: He even showed us your copy of Moby Dick! 

Heather Chandler: He’s got your handwriting down cold. 

Veronica’s Mom: Please, honey, talk to us. 

Veronica: No you wouldn’t understand. 

Veronica’s mom: Try me! I’ve experienced everything you’re going through right now. 

Heather Chandler, Ram and Kurt: Guess who’s right down the block. 

Veronica’s mom: Your problems seem like life and death!- 

Heather Chandler, Ram and Kurt: Guess who’s climbing the stairs. 

Veronica: I promise they’re not!

Heather Chandler, Ram and Kurt: Guess who’s picking your lock. 

Veronica: You don’t know what my world looks like! 

Heather Chandler, Ram and Kurt: Time’s up, go say your prayers. 

Veronica’s running on, running on fumes now. Veronica’s totally fried. Veronica’s tripping on, tripping on shrooms now, thinking that she can hide. 

Veronica’s done, there’s no doubt now! Notify next of kin! Veronica’s trying to keep him out now- too late he got in. 

JD: Knock, knock. Sorry to come through the window, dreadful etiquette I know. 

Veronica: Get out of my house! 

(END)

[recentanimenews]

It's Been 20 Years, So Where Is Pokémon Snap 2?

  The year is 1999. You're a child and your family has decided to make a trip to Blockbuster, a blue-and-yellow titan that, at this point, is mostly filled with VHS tapes of She's All That and The Matrix. You think "Perfect, I'll just grab my copy of Pokémon Snap because I really need to get these shots of Charizard printed." So you get your cartridge, and one car ride later where your Mom explains that YOU CAN ONLY PICK ONE MOVIE JUST ONE, you're making your way past the candy and the soda and the leftover toys from the 1998 Godzilla and you're at the official Pokémon Snap kiosk, where you can get pictures that you've taken in the game printed out as stickers.

  Now, in 2019, some of that seems absolutely archaic. You'd bring a Nintendo 64 cartridge to a video rental place to print out stickers? It sounds like the entertainment equivalent of old-timey medical advice like "Just put a drop on the end of the feverish baby's tongue and let the whiskey fight the flu." But in 1999, all of the effort was worth it because Pokémon Snap was, and still is to this day, one of the most fun experiences that the Pokémon brand has ever given to us. Also, I looked it up, and there were sticker stations in 4,500 locations. I did this mainly to prove that they were real and not just the coma dream that I would've had if I'd hit my head in a Blockbuster in the late 90s.

    And I bring all of this up because, on the twentieth anniversary of Pokémon Snap, we're still waiting for a sequel. But, just in case you've never played it or you clicked on this article thinking "P-O-K-E-M-O-N? That's a fun combination of letters!", Pokémon Snap was a game where you were tasked by Professor Oak (who is apparently a freelance photography critic when he's not forgetting his own grandson's name) to snap some pictures of a bunch of the wildlife on Pokémon Island. You hop into a little cart called the Zero-One and you explore the island, watching Pokémon run around and hoping that they stay still long enough for you to get a shot of them that will please godking Oak. 

  It was ridiculously fun and breezy and was the middle section of the Pokémon Holy Triumvirate of games that was begun with the original round of Game Boy entries (Red, Blue, and Yellow,) and rounded out with Pokémon Stadium a few months later. Legend has it that if you collected all of these games, you would unlock the secrets of space and time OR you would just be the most awesome kid in the neighborhood. Equal chance of either happening. 

    But when I ask "Hey Nintendo, how about another game?" know that this isn't just a random request. I'd like a sequel to just about everything I enjoy, be it video games, movies or hot dogs. But it's been twenty years and knowing how Nintendo feels about Pokémon sequels (They love them if you haven't noticed, and we'll be getting Pokémon games long after man has gone extinct), it just seems a little weird that we haven't gotten one yet. And sure, we got a re-release for the Wii and the Wii-U's Virtual Console, but for a game that sold so well and so many people feel nostalgic for, you'd think that we'd at least hear rumors of a sequel floating about.

  Even Junichi Masuda, who's been a producer and director of the Pokémon series for nearly twenty years, has basically said that if Nintendo wants to make a Pokémon Snap 2: Infinity War or whatever, he's not gonna stand in their way. And aside from the fact that a Pokémon Snap 2 would be a perfect fit for the Nintendo Switch hardware and would be a great way to introduce newer Pokémon to the next generation of trainers, it would also bring literal dumptrucks' worth of cash to Nintendo. 

  But most importantly, it would probably be super fun. One of the best things about the original Pokémon Snap was all the little secrets. You could make the Jigglypuff mad with the PokeFlute. You could form a Magneton if you lured the Magnemite together with apples. You throw an apple at Charmeleon so it falls into the lava pit and turns into Charizard (Ya know, looking back on that last one, that's kinda mean and a REAL gamble. Like how did we know that would work out? Just because it's a Fire type Pokémon? You wouldn't walk up to a Lapras and be like "Oh, an Ice type, you say? Well, how would you like this avalanche falling directly onto you? I bet you'd enjoy it, seeing as my attempted manslaughter of that Charmeleon failed in the best of ways.")

    I know that, in 2019, you'd probably be able to watch YouTube tutorials for finding and performing most of these "secrets" less than a day after the game is released. But the joy in Pokémon Snap didn't just come from knowing that you COULD do stuff, but from being able to pull it off yourself. You'd hear from your friends about these amazing feats that sounded like the perfect combination of skill and luck and then you'd go home and try it for yourself. Whereas the Pokémon main series games have usually been about catching your own teams, training your own 'mons, forging your own path, and then trading and battling with people, Snap was a purely solo game that was instantly communal. Yes, it mostly just ended with the island being full of tossed apples, but as soon as the Zero-One started down the track and those Pidgey flew in the way, you and your friends were on a quest to uncover everything.

  And I would love if Pokémon fans in 2019 could recapture even a sliver of that feeling. It didn't have the stakes of becoming "the greatest trainer" or "catching them all," but it was a fun way to explore another facet of the Pokémon world that hasn't been touched on enough since, well, Pokémon Snap. And while it's probably too late for Blockbuster or sticker stations or all of those toys left over from the 1998 Godzilla, it's not too late for Pokémon Snap 2.

  Did you play Pokémon Snap? What was your favorite secret? Would you want a sequel? Let us know in the comments!

  -------------------------------

  Daniel Dockery is a writer and editor for Crunchyroll. You can follow him on Twitter.

  Do you love writing? Do you love anime? If you have an idea for a features story, pitch it to Crunchyroll Features!

    By: news+feed@crunchyroll.com

[themomsandthecity]

You Won't Know Whether to Laugh or Cry Over These 26 Embarrassing Pregnancy Stories

Image Source: Shutterstock Losing some control of your body comes with the territory when you're pregnant. Between the sneezes that make you pee to your mattress or toilet seat literally cracking under the pressure, sometimes there's nothing you can do about these pregnancy "joys." If you've ever had a regrettable experience thanks to your baby bump, take comfort in knowing that you're not alone. These 26 moms got real about their most cringe-worthy pregnancy moments as proof that you deserve a good laugh for going through all of this - even if you accidentally farted on your husband. * "I pulled over to the side of the road to throw up one night on my way home from work when I was 12 weeks pregnant. A cop pulled up behind me and I had to convince him that I was pregnant, not intoxicated!" - Taylor Timms * "I was at the grocery store with my daughter in tow and it was evidently senior citizen day! A nice elderly woman behind us asked my spunky girl if mommy was having a boy or girl. Her response, 'We don't know but if it's a boy, we are going to name him Dumptruck Penis and if it's a girl, she'll be Jessie Vagina.'" - Jennifer DiFilippo Martin * "While running to the [store's] bathroom puking and swallowing, I opened the door and puked all over this poor teenager coming out. I couldn't even apologize since I was barfing so hard. The poor kid just cried." - Missa Andrew Image Source: Comedy Central * "First child: I broke our toilet seat when I sat down. Second child: When I picked [my son up] in my arms, he stuck his hands down my shirt and told his teacher that my boobs are much bigger now and more comfy to sleep on." - Lindsay LoConte * "I was the only pregnant girl in the whole school. During a biology class, the teacher said something along the lines of 'not being stupid, like this one over her'" and pointed at me. The whole class laughed and I ran out crying." - Nikki Rousos * "When I was pregnant with my first child, I was constipated so badly. I had just gotten out of the shower and was bending down to dry my legs and He kicked HARD. And let's say I wasn't constipated anymore. The worst part was my ex husband opened up the door to talk to me the second before everything happened." - Sherri Lynn Cummins-Schaefer Image Source: Universal Pictures * "Pregnancy brings out my being lactose intolerant. I had my morning coffee with cream and went about my day when my hubby thought it would be fun to have sex. We started and I sh*t all over him." - Hope Zidan-Caron * "When I was prego with my second child, I had a bowel movement while sleeping. I dreamed that I was on the toilet doing my business and..." - Linda Clubine Bloodworth * "I had a lot of gas and farted mid 'adult time' with my significant other... He farted back to make me feel better." - Joslynn R'Little * "When I went to do my three hour sugar test, I knew it was a bad idea. Shortly after drinking that nasty warm orange sugar drink they give you, I started feeling nauseous. Before I could grab a trashcan, it started to come back up. It was like an explosion of vomit all over my face in a waiting room of people." - Deana Morris Image Source: DreamWorks * "The morning of my ultrasound, I'm sitting in the waiting room, and I start to feel like I was going to throw up. I make it to the bathroom in time, but since I had to have a full bladder (for the ultrasound), I peed all over myself and the floor of the bathroom stall. They called my turn as I was in there, so I went ahead and had the ultrasound done. I was wet, cold, and miserably embarrassed." - Heather Herrin Kreitzman * " I had this terrible itch where the sun don't shine and was running for a taxi at the same time. When I was more settled, my hubby told me, 'That was nasty my dear ... everybody were starring at you.'" - Budi Mummy Shrestha * "With my second child, I was sitting in the bathtub trying to shave my legs. Well my belly was so big that with one stroke, I shaved my belly button instead!" - Kristina Lynn Stewart Image Source: Disney Channel * "I bent down to get a book off of the shelf and my trousers ripped apart - in the public library where it's nice and quite and the rip was quite literally a ripper!" - Tammy Burden * "I got a spray tan towards the end and was at the point where I had a hard time holding my bladder. I peed during my spray tan on the floor! Streaks all down my legs!" - Amy Simmons * "I used to work as a wine waitress at a hotel. Walking between the tight tables with one hand behind my back and the other holding the tray with a bottle of wine, my bump hit the back of a bald guy's head, and the bottle fell into his lap. I wasn't allowed in the restaurant after that." - Kirsty Lauren Breeze Image Source: Giphy * "I went to the grocery store and didn't realize the whole time I was there, the back of my skirt was tucked in the waist band with my rear end hanging out. No one told me and I didn't notice until I got home." - Meredith Thomas Hutchinson * "When I was pregnant with my son, I was changing my daughter's nappy and vomited on her legs at a park." - Nikita Clarke Hitchens * "I had a customer point out in front of other customers that my belly button was sticking out. It doesn't sound that bad but it was seriously awkward." - JamieLee J. Trawicki * "Heavily pregnant and in my friend's car, I started to feel faint, pains, and then wetness. Convinced that I was in labor, I rang the husband and up to the hospital we went. Nope. I had just peed myself in her ca- Yvonne Halpin Image Source: E! * "I was still in high school and leaned against the desk in one of my classes. When I stood up, one whole side of my shirt was soaked from leaking and some guy in class pointed it out in front of everyone!" - Stier HalleyCharity * "I wore two very different shoes to work for quite a while before I went to the restroom and noticed, to my horror." - Jenna Patterson Smith * "I got stuck in a bathtub about two weeks before I gave birth to my oldest. I was stuck in there for over three hours." - Jennifer Singleton * "I peed and farted while my husband was helping me put on my pajama bottoms." - Illiana Rosario-Urban * "I farted in front of my boss." - Holly Gregory * "My oldest threw up - a ton - in his car seat just before we got home. While trying to get him out and help clean up, I couldn't handle it and started throwing up in the parking lot. I was throwing up so hard that I also peed my pants. Then I started laughing hysterically/crying because there was nothing else I could do." - Lyndsy Chavarria http://bit.ly/2oAoPV7