SPG Kazooland Master Post
Kazooland is the alternate dimension in the Steam Powered Giraffe Universe. This post contains various facts and tidbits mentioned by David and Bunny Bennett about it on tumblr and the official SPG websites over the years. Please feel free to share more information in the reblogs!
Kazooland was named for the mentor of David Bennett, Bunny Bennett, Jon Sprague, Erin Burke, and Bryan Barbarin, Mr.Jerry Hager's mime persona: Kazoo the Mime
By 1897, Peter Walter had unlocked the power of Blue Matter and subsequently, created an alternate reality he dubbed Kazooland.
Excerpt from The Story of the Cavalcadium
The Cavalcadium tried to make a permanent portal to Kazooland in their building, based on Peter Walter I’s studies.
The Cavalcadium was wiped from existence in an instant, and it took Peter a few months to realize it had simply vanished. Time and space itself left a void to forget it ever was.
The Cavalcadium building now exists in the seams of Kazooland, and acts as a hub to many other parts of the dimension. A few doorways even exist on Earth.
Current link to the map of Kazooland: https://www.thecavalcadium.com/Kazooland.html
Information available about Kazooland as late as 2014
Asininia*
The dark kingdom of Ignatius Becile. Long having taken refuge from Earth, the black-handed Becile has built a giant city which is depleting Asininia of its natural resources and precious rock candy veins. His aim is creating an unstoppable army of candy-powered automatons to consume the universe.
*name is derived from “asinine”
The 8th Dimension of Absolute and Infinite Terror
The only persistent door to the terrible 8th dimension. Its history is unclear but it is indeed locked and guarded by Jumbo, The Pink Whale With A Top Hat.* The 8th dimension is notorious for being the place of fermenting nightmares and evil Lovecraftian Beasts.
*Jumbo can be found in the album The Vice Quadrant, guarding Commander Cosmo and The Necrostar
Horroria
A jagged mountain range of ash and death, which is primarily a refuge for monsters. A couple of human settlements exist, but the majority of inhabitants of the continent are Vampires, Werewolves, Demons, Zombies, Witches, Cultists, Poltergeists, Man-Eating Hamburgers, and Hamburger-Eating Men.
Hypexion V
A presumed alien homeworld of the Hypexions; thin bipedal humanoids with a sweet tooth.
Ironically Foreboding Shaped Islands
The Chaos Sea marks these bodies of land as a legend, but time travelers and fortunate explorers speak of adventurous sailors, pirates, and buried treasure. It is believed the famous Captain Albert Alexander was the first to have sailed the Chaos Sea, yet only stories remain.
Lola
The Hypexion Moon infested with the diabolical Moon Worms. The Moon Worm Queen is held responsible for eating a chunk of Hypexion V before she was destroyed, but a newly born Moon Worm Queen is the talk among the stars. The talking stars of course.
Lotsasand
An ancient dust land belonging to the ancestors of the Kingdom of Set. Though primarily a land for the outsourcing of dust and camels, the age old tales of Jackal Men, Living Mummies, and Scarab People still invoke questions of mysticism in even the most skeptical of skeptics.
Meh
An icy northern land of Snow Queens and Mystical Creatures. Many a wise pipe smoking old bearded man tell stories about this enchanted place, but few are listened to.
Merveille
Merveille is the remains of the once great Circus Empire, which exploded eons ago and left a watercolored land of saturated imagination. The inhabitants are mostly the Speechless Ones, also known as Mimes. It is often described as a tangible dream, and artists from all over the multiverse have tapped into its presence for inspiration and escape.
Cities:
Bip
The capital of Merveille was named after its founder, and is a favorite spot for vacation for Peter Walter VI. It was also in Bip that the Great War of 1823 was ended by a mysterious mime with a magical kazoo.
New Pieland
Once a paradise of wilderness, pilgrims from Old Pieland settled here declaring it New Pieland after their former continent was completely devoured since it actually lived up to its namesake. It was quite literally a giant land mass of flaky crust with a warm gooey appley interior.
New Pieland is home to many American immigrants and many other multiverse settlers. Humans, Robots, Clowns, Cat People, and Vleeds are just a few of the races you'll find in the melting pot which is New Pieland.
Cities:
Biscuit Town
Biscuit Town is a famous small mining town in the eastern part of New Pieland. It is home primarily to clowns, wizards, and talking animals. Biscuit Town has been run by Walter Robot The Jon until recently, and was the first town in New Pieland to elect a robot for Mayor. Currently, in the Jon's absence the Mayor's Assistant Boft is struggling with the encroaching rogue nation of Asininia, a resource-hungry super kingdom of mad scientists and candy-powered androids.
Preferbia
This large sprawling landscape of suburbia is a metropolis of 1950's ideals, where the beautiful residents are protected from the ravages of time by a blue matter rich force field over the city. Created by a visionary man from Earth after slipping through an interdimensional rift, Howard Lloyd saw the potential of the unstable rift and created what some have called the 1950s utopia of mankind. Those who enter the city rarely decide to leave the prospect of eternal youth, but some do choose to escape Preferbia's roving gangs of fish mutants and frequent attacks by the Hypexion Moon Worms.
Snornia
Snornia is the last remaining haven for mystical beings. It is cut off from the rest of the world by a vengeful Dragon God, but those who have seen it speak of a fantastical world of magic and danger, with princesses in towers, dexterous elves making shoes, and six winged warlocks. Humans who find ways to enter usually do so to train to become wizards or dragons, but many are eaten by the Dragon God, and even more give up and sail to Party Island.
South Adventurica
A largely unexplored tangle of constantly transforming jungles, swamps, and plains unbound by any mappable record of time. Adventurers have sought to unlock the continent's mysteries for years, and its surprises still continue to surprise avid surprise seekers. Dinosaurs, giant insects, carnivorous plants, elementals, Forgotten Gods, Bobby Darin, and Santa Claus are all said to live here, but the only proof of their existence are the ravaged journals from explorers of the past...
And that captured dinosaur amusement park off the coast.
Verk
A rainy settlement of time travelers from the 1890s. It is separated from the world by an ethereal mist of aether called "Henry's Breath," long believed to be generated by the fat ghost of England's Henry the 8th. Most settlers began traversing the aether via multidimensional travel from when Colonel P. A. Walter I discovered Blue Matter in 1896, but all matter of being from the multiverse seems to have leaked through to embrace knowledge, Victorian style, and to tinker with steampunk abominations.
Cities:
Dandyton
The Capital of Verk is a bustling city of inventors, scientists, airship pilots, alchemists, airship pilots, ghosts, and airship pilots. It is home to the Verk Dandy Candy Factory, many airships, and the Verkian Rift, a dimensional hub to countless other realities.
The (old) Cavalcadium landing page including links to Worlds (Earth, Kazooland, and the 8th Dimension), Characters, and Species
Characters include (but are not limited to): Beebop, Bip, Boft, Brown Suits, Buster Becile, Captain Albert Alexander, Delilah, Doc Laborday, G. G., Guy Hottie, Hatchworth,The Highwayman, I. M. Becile, Kazoo, Lily Brennan, Lorene Keaton, Norman Becile, Peter Walter I, Peter Walter II, Peter Walter III, Peter Walter IV, Peter Walter V, Peter Walter VI, Rabbit, Rex Marksley, The Jon, The Spine, The Suspender Man, Uncle Ralphie, Upgrade, and Wanda Becile
Species include (but are not limited to): Robots, Samurai, Scarab People, Seafarers, Steampunks, Talking Animals, Trolls, Vampires, Vleeds, Warlocks, Werewolfs, Witchs, Wizards, and Zombies
The Temecula Rift
Prior to the 2013 Walter Robotics Expo, an accident occurred while 26 y/o Peter Walter VI accidentally sealed a Blue Matter Rift that he was trying to open for high speed inter-dimensional travel between Earth and Kazooland. The result was an explosion that singularly hit Peter Walter VI in his face. He now wears an iconic keyhole mask to hide whatever the results of the explosion may have been.
Links:
https://pawaltervi.tumblr.com/post/49702485000/regarding-the-temecula-rift
https://pawaltervi.tumblr.com/post/51763873084/walter-robotics-owner-peter-walter-vi-hospitalized
https://pawaltervi.tumblr.com/post/52636220497/a-message-from-peter-walter-vi
Audio posts of Isabella Bennett discussing Kazooland Canon circa 2015:
Kazooland Canon 1/3
Kazooland Canon 2/3
Kazooland Canon 3/3
Rabbit’s white faceplates are made from a porcelain-like material from Kazooland called Impossium
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