#But I dont understand stacks fully so im struggling

[eligobrrrrr]

I have to do like, 2 whole (small) programs and an investigation for today and I'm just sitting infront of my pc like

This shit crazy

[tendouluvr]

hq!! boys taking care of their s/o who just got their wisdom teeth out - gn reader

- characters: iwaizumi, osamu, matsukawa, kyōtani

- warnings: small mentions of being on anesthesia, centered around wisdom teeth removal/oral surgery, wisdom recovery, vague mentions of blood/gauze/medications nothing graphic tho, a lot of talk about food and eating limitations

- wc: 198, 258, 241, 252

a/n: im writing as im currently recovering from my wisdom teeth removal 😪😪 so kinda (basically) v self-indulgent

this is all based on my own experience. i’m healing pretty fast i think and there hasn’t been any problems for me so i wouldn’t know, personally, cases where people get heavy nausea, dry sockets, etc etc

IWAIZUMI

#! the best :(((

#! follows every direction the surgeon gave to the dot

#! before the surgery, he was given some papers and it was covered with post-surgery aftercare instructions and he read everything over multiple times

#! doesn’t let you do anything for days even though you were capable of doing things yourself by the third day

#! makes a lot of smoothies

#! he already drinks smoothies a lot on a regular basis besides his protein shakes and all that so being his s/o, you also get to drink them every other day

#! but your smoothie intake goes ☝️

#! understands your pain, makes sure you’re taking all of your required medications on time (he sets up alarms and timers) and giving you any doses of pain relievers as needed

#! (was about to blend up meals for you but you were adamant on him not doing that. you did not want to eat blended liquified food when it’s usually meant to be eaten solid)

#! overall,, kinda strict but he’s just tryna make sure you fully recover properly with no complications :)) you’ll probably be annoyed with him at some point for feeding you another smoothie, but you’re grateful for him anyway <3333

OSAMU

#! he’s a foodie :’(

#! lowk (highkey) sad you won’t be able to eat normally with him until you’re fully healed (could be weeks, could be up to a month and a half)

#! did a lot of research before and during the recovery process to go grocery shopping so he knows what he should stock up on and what he shouldn’t get

#! was kinda convinced four (4) days into recovery that you could start eating a bit normal again but you had to tell him no

#! “so when can you eat my onigiris again? it’s getting boring when only i’m trying new recipes, and you can’t,” he would constantly huff

#! “go feed your brother,” you would reply with an eye roll making him pout

#! your bottle of salt water is always filled because he makes sure it never runs out

#! his search history (and yours) is full of “can i eat ___ after wisdom teeth removal” LMAO mine is

#! to be honest, he was probably more scared of the surgery than you were

#! throughout the healing process, you grew a lot of cravings for a lot of food you couldn’t eat so he would write down everything whenever you tell him while laying in bed together

#! promises to make you all of the food on the list once you can properly eat again :’))

#! will spoil you rotten after this

you have no idea how bad i want focaccia bread rn. i need it. in my mouth. just imagine warm, crispy, chewy fresh out of the oven focaccia bread 💭💭💭

MATSUKAWA

#! does not care.

#! JK

#! he does care but he’ll act like he doesn’t

#! immediately laughs at you passed out on anesthesia in the passenger seat as he’s driving home

#! he’s still holding your hand though and caressing it 🙄

#! literally thought you would’ve been healed the next day for whatever reason ://

#! told you, “you look like a squirrel,” while you were sleeping in bed with gauze in your mouth

#! teases you a lot about the pain cuz he’s a meanie but he does things to take care of you at the same time

#! like reminding you to not drink with a straw because you sometimes forget, or making sure he doesn’t make you laugh/talk too much cuz it really hurts to open your mouth

#! constantly asks you about your extraction sites even though you already told him all you know

#! tempted to squeeze your cheeks because they looked so cute but you were swollen,,,,

#! stacks your pillows up at night so you’re not laying all the way down (he heard it helps with your swelling, something to do with your head being higher than your heart)

#! laughs when you struggle with brushing your teeth (he makes himself so despiseable)

#! kisses your forehead every night and whispers praises before you sleep to let you know you’re doing very well and will recover in no time

I HATE HIM I HATE HIM I HATE HIM GET THIS MAN OUT OF MY SIGHT!

KYŌTANI

#! leaves you to fend for yourself

#! im kidding >< he’s a sweetheart

#! helps you change into your pajamas after he brought you home so you can go to sleep

#! gets all of your meds ready while you were sleeping so you didn’t have to do it yourself after you woke up

#! he holds gauzes out for you while you take out your bloody ones so you didn’t have to stumble around for new ones

#! you lived off of water for a bit because you were afraid to actually eat (you also couldn’t really open your mouth anyway)

#! so when you finally told him you’ll eat now, he makes you whatever you wanted out of your very limited choices

#! he has a tiny grumpy pout while doing everything but it’s just his natural face :( he loves taking care of you, i promise

#! but you don’t really care honestly, you find it adorable

#! he slowly gets irritated as time goes on though because he doesn’t like that you’re going through this and it’s ruining the kisses you would give him from time to time

#! is actually a little childish when it comes to life in general so he gets really pouty at some point with furrowed eyebrows that just keeps getting furrowed-er

#! he grumbles a lot while taking care of you because even after oral surgery you could still find a way to tease him about being a softie

#! threatens to leave you to take care of yourself but he’s all bark

my mom thought i was healed the day after my surgery and kept telling me i’m just being dramatic about not being able to eat a lot of things (and she kept cooking omf) and told me she thinks i’m fine and worried for no reason shdjsjaj i dont think she knew i had stitches in my mouth 😕

[drangues]

IM DOING MY BEST, the key is just working it into my routine? I’m gonna try having it in plain sight at my normal seat in the kitchen and hope that helps a bit. Also yeah, if I don’t forget that I wrote it down at all, it’ll kinda fade into visual static or something? Like, I’ll see it, but not register it. And!!! I’m glad you got through it, at least- That’s always the hardest part. I’m sure you’ll do fine, though!!! And even if you don’t, it won’t horribly affect you, I’d hope. (Nyanon, 1/7)

Also your teacher is a Fool if a doodle of a cat doesn’t convince them, it’d convince me. Anyways, Dazai and Chuuya really are a great BrOTP for me, too- Though they’re slightly nudged out by Dazai and Kunikida for me, because the two of them are hilarious and I’ll admit that I think they’re healthier for each other than Dazai and Chuuya are in canon? Which is less on Soukoku and more on the situation and how they were forced to proceed, really. (In other news, Mori, why?) (Nyanon, 2/7)

It’d probably be better in Literally Any Other Universe. But also I’m sucker for the team of Dazai, Kunikida, Atsushi, and Kyouka, so I could also be a bit biased. I’m glad you have a friendship that you’re so confident in, though!!! I don’t know if I have a friend like that myself, but it’s nice to hear that others do. And listen I’m here for ANY Akutagawa and Atsushi friendship, they’re the sort of friends who’re like “IM the only one who can tease them” and it’s great. (Nyanon, 3/7)

But yeah, in the Moving Castle-verse specifically, they’d be hilarious, especially coming from such wildly different backgrounds??? Akutagawa doesn’t get why the books have to be organized so meticulously, they’re just stacks of paper, and also that’s the third time Atsushi’s swept today is he alright? Atsushi, meanwhile, is horrified by how,, Chaotic, Akutagawa’s “system” is- There are bottles everywhere, how does he find anything??? See, this is why Dazai’s hair got messed up. (Nyanon, 4/7)

Of course, like you said, it comes from a place of friendship and they also try and look out for each other- Atsushi refuses to let Akutagawa work if he’s not feeling well, and Akutagawa tries to be neater with his things, since he knows how anxious messes make Atsushi. Also can I just say that I feel like old!Atsushi would look like a guy who gives very good hugs? I feel like he’d look like a very sweet old man... Anyways YEAH everyone is BSD needs a hug. (Nyanon, 5/7)

Except for like, a few people, you know the ones. Fuck them. It’s just that I wanna hug Atsushi specifically, I feel like it’d be akin to hugging a cat. Also you canNOT tell me that Dazai wouldn’t pull something like that to get a very cuddly Atsushi in his lap, he’s just that Chaotic. And that’s fair, but consider- Atsushi using games like that (though not just otome games, to be fair) to feel like he means something to someone when he’s feeling really low about himself. (Nyanon, 6/7)

Also listen Atsushi is a Very hard worker and Kunikida Knows This, he isn’t gonna punish him for being sleepy. Also Atsushi helps by doing a lot of Dazai’s paperwork and Kunikida will freely admit that this alone earns him a few naps. Moving on to another Scenario Concept, though: Atsushi letting Kyouka (and the others, if they wanna) dress him up! Kyouka specifically because she’s his baby sis, but I do feel he’d really enjoy people doing his hair or painting his nails. (Nyanon, 7/7)

you can do it!! youre gonna get it into your routine in no time, my friend irl has add so i understand the struggles that come with it (not fully of course since i dont have it but you get me). my teacher is indeed a fool and i hope i have you as my teacher instead

OH GOD YES DAZAI AND KUNIKIDAAAA they work so well together and just F I T i love their dynamic i hate it when its JUST reduced to “oh kunikida hates dazai lol” (which is partly true, but its what makes their brotp amazing) there was a dazatsu fic i read where dazai was bleeding out`?? and he confessed his love to atsushi to kunikida who was like “Bruh focus on not DYING” and i think that was a really beautiful brotp moment between them tbh

YOU DESERVE A FRIEND LIKE THAT. HERES TO HOPING YOULL GET ONE YOURE SUCH A NICE PERSON AND INTERESTING TO TALK TO

old!atsushi definitely looks like he can give good hugs!! everyone in bsd needs hugs indEED agreed dude, the image that hugging atsushi is like hugging a cat lives rent free in my head now thank you i love it. atsushi playing those games to feel validated is S A D D D D D UGH BBY COME HEREEEEE

kunikida seeing him as a wonderful coworker warms my heart, i absolutely love it thank you and kyouka giving atsushi make over cause she gets a bit too obsessed with makeover reality tv shows is geTTING M  E  EE E I LOVE IT

[themoneybuff-blog]

Handling the Financial Irresponsibility of Family Members

When youve devoted a lot of effort to fixing your own finances and putting yourself on a great financial track and youve spent a lot of time absorbing and thinking about good financial practices, the financial conversations you hear can sometimes be really frustrating. Youll hear people talking about their huge financial missteps as though theyre no big deal or even as though theyre a good thing. For example, maybe youll hear from a relative who is proud of the fact that they replace their new vehicle every three years with another new one when they barely make $40,000 a year. That alone isnt a big deal, but its often coupled with conversation about how theyre struggling financially and how the entire financial system is unfair. That same cousin who showed up in the brand new pickup truck that looks virtually identical to the brand new pickup truck they bought three years ago complains about how the whole system is rigged and that theyll never retire, and then theyll turn to you and expect agreement and reinforcement. Even worse is the relative who takes you aside to give you a long sob story of financial misfortune, one that would have been mostly solved with an emergency fund, and then asks for a loan that you both know theyll never pay back. Those situations happen to me on occasion, and I used to find them incredibly frustrating and almost anger-inducing. Their financial mistakes were incredibly obvious and I wanted to simply say, Cant you see that youre doing this financial damage to yourself? Over time, as I matured a little and heard many, many stories like this from readers, I came to realize something very important: most people do realize their own financial mistakes. That cousin knows how much those trucks are costing him. That other cousin knows that theyve made some bad moves to wind up in a position where theyre swallowing their pride and basically begging for money. People are not unaware of their own financial missteps. If people arent unaware of their missteps, whats going on, then? For starters, while understanding (at least some of) your mistakes can be pretty easy, actually correcting those mistakes is pretty hard. It requires a lot of behavioral changes. It requires a lot of self-denial. Most people wont commit to those kinds of changes in their life unless its desperate. At the same time, if youre not making a ton of money, its very hard to get ahead financially because you just dont have a lot to work with and there isnt much room for error. You can make lots of good financial moves, but if you dont have a lot of money to begin with, one or two missteps or one big unfortunate event can undo a lot of effort, and that contributes strongly to a sense of hopelessness. Another factor to consider is that while many people might not like aspects of their life like their retirement situation they like other aspects of their life a lot and thus, on the balance, they prefer things as they are rather than making changes. I know a lot of people in this camp. While they might long to have more money or have a healthy retirement savings, when they look at their life on the whole and the changes they perceive that they would have to make to get on a different path, they dont want to make those changes. Their life, as it is now, is better for them on the whole. Im sure that, in some aspects of your life, theres something youre unhappy with, that youd like to correct, but you dont do so because the balance that you have in your life right now is better than what it would take to correct that thing, so you table it. Many, many people do that with their finances. Furthermore, people often want to blame forces outside of their control for the things that go wrong in their life. Undoubtedly, forces outside of our control can smash into our life like a meteor, but we made a lot of decisions leading up to those events and after those events. Did we prepare our life to be future-proof, or did we live in the moment? It takes some introspection to see this, but its a flavor of introspection that many people dont want to take on. It doesnt mean theyre bad, it just means that they want an easy explanation for their financial difficulties and unexpected events are an easy thing to point at. When you consider those factors, it becomes clear that when you see someone else being financially irresponsible, it shouldnt frustrate you; rather, its simply a different choice of priorities. It does not mean that your priorities are right and theirs are wrong, nor does it mean that their priorities are right and yours are wrong. Very likely, your priorities are right for the condition of your life and your own personal characteristics, and their priorities are right for the condition of their life and their characteristics. So, lets roll things back to that family event where your cousin who has that brand new vehicle is complaining about never being able to retire because the system is stacked against them. It might feel frustrating, particularly if youve worked hard to put yourself in a position where you can retire and you know from personal experience that it can be done with hard work, but what should you actually do? Nothing. Thats what you should do. Just sit there and listen to their story. Its not your story. Its their story. Just listen. If you feel frustrated, just try to envision the world through their shoes for a while. That person probably has a lot of personal pride in that truck of theirs, which is why theyre always buying a new one. That other person probably feels overwhelmed by a series of unfortunate events in their life. There is almost no case in which your interjections about financial responsibility are going to be welcome. Instead, try to find a rapport or common ground with that person. Ask questions about their story. Compliment their truck and look it over with positive reactions to it. There will come a time when you are telling your story (but probably not today), and thats the point where you can slip in some financial wisdom. Today, listen to their story and use that opportunity to build a stronger relationship. What if youre being asked for money in some way? If the person is asking you for money, then you should absolutely feel free to say no. There should never be an obligation to just fork over money upon request, no matter what the relationship and no matter what the situation. Just say no. Being in a situation where youve loaned money to a relative or a close friend creates a lender-borrower relationship, and no one on earth has warm and fuzzy feelings for their lender. They might be appreciative of the loan, but theyll never feel joyous about repaying it, and that means some degree of negative feeling from them is going to be levied toward you. Rather, look for other ways to help. Offer to help them find work or to polish their resume. Offer to look over their business plan. Offer to give them a ride to work for the next few weeks until their car is fixed. If you absolutely feel as though you should help them directly, then make it a fully no-strings-attached gift. Just put the money in their hand and tell them that its theirs. If you absolutely feel you must give someone some advice, get them into a one-on-one situation and tell them that you have some experience with getting ones financial house in better shape and youd love to give them some suggestions, if they want. Leave the ball in their court dont thrust unsolicited financial advice at them as it will often be resented. Aside from those things, the best thing you can do is stand back and try to gain an appreciation of their story as a distinct journey through life, not just an extension of your own story. Many, many family conflicts occur when you try to substitute what you value into someone elses story thats centered around what they value. You dont know whats best for them, so dont fall into that trap. Theres very little benefit and a whole lot of pain down that path. Good luck! https://www.thesimpledollar.com/handling-the-financial-irresponsibility-of-family-members/