#Ch: Ella

[finestmoment]

ella finished her shift at the bar and was happy to see that her dad's boat was free for the night. she wasn't technically allowed to take it, but mason never stayed mad for long, as long as ella was careful. she started heading down the dock when she ran into someone around her age smoking a cigarette by the water. "hey." she smirked, approaching her dad's boat which was right by him.

[cass1x1]

ok imm sorry but the “ i only have eyes for you. ” meme is so elogan coded 👀

@carlyraejcpsen

send in     “ i only have eyes for you. “     for five times where the sender was caught staring in admiration/affection at the receiver, by the receiver.     ( scenarios can vary! examples include: the receiver delivering a fierce passionate speech to encourage people to do something, the receiver walking into a room while dressed glamorously, the receiver walking into a room while dressed NOT glamorously, literally ANYTHING! )

int. tattoo shop; afternoon

Of all the habits Ella had formed over her years, the hardest to shake was the need to be busy. It seemed ,to her, despite what her friends often said, that there was no harm in wanting to be busy. That it was good, in fact, to want to be productive. She understood that they were trying to help, but she also couldn't sit idly by. That ability had passed her by.

So while she waited for Logan to finish up his appointment, she had to find something to do. It wouldn't do for her to offer help. And Beyonce, the cat, was perfectly content to nap in the window. So what was she to do? Well, for starter, she tidied, putting all the magazines left out in a pretty little display. She found the glass cleaner and wiped down the display case where they sold earrings. And then, having helped herself to the supply closet, she swept. None of it was necessary--Logan and his fellow artists kept a perfectly nice, clean shop--but she liked the act of it all. And she liked to think that, in exchange for seeing her so late, Ella could save him some time at closing.

The trouble was that he kept a tidy shop, in fact. Ella ran out of things to do rather quickly. She would have to sit back down. Perhaps read one of the magazines she'd set up so nicely. There was one that said it had recipes for watermelon, so she was just about to do that when there was a movement in the corner of her eye. She made an involuntary sound, covering her mouth immediately so it didn't sound like a scream.

Logan laughed, pushing himself up off the wall to approach her. "You okay there?"

Ella put her hand on her heart. "Yes, sorry. You startled me. How long were you there?"

"Did you realize you were singing?" he asked. That wasn't an answer to her question, but even more than that, it surprised her. She frowned--had she been singing?

"No." A hot blush rose on her cheeks. "I'm so sorry. Did I dist--"

"You don't have to apologize. It was--it reminded me of before."

She forced herself to hold his gaze. Logan had always had such sharp eyes; Ella couldn't help but feel nervous under them. "I'm glad, then" she said.

ii. ext. high line park; sunset

There was something magical about being out late on a summer evening. The sun set slowly and left the sky twinged gold for a long time. Ella always felt extra warm and glowing at that hour. But today, she was especially enchanted.

Ella hadn't known where Logan was taking her; only that he'd said it would be outside. The park was stunning: a long, raised, paved trail with native plants along each side. From different spots, she could see out over the city. She could watch the water over the Hudson river. Everywhere she stopped, there was something magical to see.

She stopped at one of the little outcroppings and leaned against the rail. The sun left a trail of golden light over the water, and if she looked hard, she could see the outline of boats out towards New Jersey. "Wow," she gasped, stepping back to turn her attention back to Logan. "It's so beautiful."

When her eyes met Logan's, there was an intensity to them that threw her off-balance. He looked like he was looking through her, trying to find something. Despite wanting to thank him, Ella couldn't hold that gaze; she turned away to look back out over the park. "Sorry," he said softly. "I was just..." He didn't finish the sentence.

Ella turned back to him. Logan looked like his usual self--this new usual self that she was still getting used to, a little warier, a little less silly. A little more handsome than she remembered. Her cheeks warmed at that. She hoped he assumed it was about the park. "No, it's fine, I'm sorry," she answered, more as a reflex than anything else. "I--I just wanted to thank you for bringing me here."

"Yeah," he said, looking away this time. "It's pretty great, huh?"

iii. ext. apartment; morning

Ella hadn't dressed up for Logan to come over. No, that would be silly. But she was wearing her favorite dress because today was a good day and when she woke up, she felt drawn to it. No matter how her roommate had teased her, said that Logan would enjoy seeing her in this color, Ella brushed it off. He wasn't--he wouldn't--it wasn't like that. Even if sometimes she thought about it being like that, those were just the kinds of thoughts that were normal to have about so old a friend. Surely, that was it.

Still, when she noticed him waiting on the stoop of her building, she found it was hard to look him in the eye. Ella had always had a hard time with that; she was more shy than she expected to be. Instead, she froze, half-way down the steps. Rather than meet his gaze, she dug her phone out of her bag and reviewed their plans for the day. Museum tickets? Check. Lunch spot? Picked out. Her drawings? Yes, she had them, even if she was nervous to share them.

Once she'd looked over everything, and couldn't think of any other reason to delay, and didn't want to make him late, she turned up, immediately caught in his gaze. He'd been watching, which she'd suspected from the way she'd felt eyes on her. Ella straightened, tucking a piece of hair behind her ear and wishing maybe she had dressed up for him, so that she would be worth looking at.

"You look great," Logan said, as if he'd read her thoughts.

Her stomach dropped-oh, god, had she said any of that out loud? "Oh, I...thank you. Her voice was uneasy. Would it be weird if she asked if she'd spoken aloud?

If he was reading her mind, he was doing a very good job of it, by the way he laughed, offering her his hand like he was going to escort her down the steps. "I don't mean to be weird, but I wanted you to know why I was staring. You look great, is all."

Ella took his hand. She took the last few steps and, when she got to the sidewalk, she turned up to look at him. He wasn't joking or teasing her--not that he would joke about something like that--just sincerely, openly staring. "You--" She hated how nervous her voice came out. This wasn't like that and she wished her roommate hadn't said anything because now the idea was in her head. She cleared her throat and smiled. Ella was good at putting on a smile. "You look quite handsome, yourself." This time, she sounded more normal, thankfully. More like herself. "That color is nice on you."

Logan ducked his head. Like her, he was better at giving a compliment than taking one. At least that had stayed the same between them. "Shall we?"

"Yes."

iv. int. animal shelter; evening

After all the food was gone, after all the guests had left and the lucky dogs adopted off, there was just this: the remaining trash on the floor, and the donation box to be counted up. Several other volunteers had offered to handle the trash, and left Ella and Logan with the lock boxes. Once she'd offered--five or six times--for him to go home, she gave in and accepted his offer to help. It was late, and everyone was exhausted, her included. If he helped, maybe they could all get home a little faster.

They'd divided the bills up, so it was just a matter of counting and tallying. Ella had worked a dozen jobs where she opened and closed; she could make quick work of this. And, as far as she knew, Logan could too. But when she glanced up from her count, Logan still had his pile in his hand. His eyes seemed fixed on her hands, focus entirely on her.

He seemed surprised when she made a sound. His eyes slid up, from her hands to her face. There they settled, a warm, soft gaze holding onto her. "Did, uh, did I do something wrong? Or make a mistake?" she asked.

"No," Logan said immediately. And then, chagrined, "I don't think so. I wasn't listening." Ella smiled, writing her tally down before putting her hand out. Logan shook his head and, with one last flick of his eyes, began his own count.

While he worked, Ella watched him. The smooth movement of his hands, the sound of him counting under his breath. The way his eyes flicked up to catch hers every few minutes. It was fascinating. She wondered if, perhaps, this was what distracted him in the first place.

v. ext. restaurant; evening

Once she'd gotten used to the idea, dating had not been so hard for her. She was naturally social, and she liked going out. She'd tried speed dating, tried tinder, tried all sorts of options, and all of them had felt effortless. Ella was good enough at that sort of thing that she'd never had a bad date, but she'd never gotten the hang of flirting. She said precisely what she thought, and in precisely the simple way that she thought them. She had no skill for pretty words.

Logan, on the other hand? Well, he just couldn't seem to help himself. He made it seem so easy, with his casual words and his playful looks and his laugh that rumbled through her entire body. Ella felt like should barely keep up with him. Her cheeks hurt from laughing and blushing. She felt giddy and light, tipsy off of the easy conversation and smiles.

By the time they left, the sun had fully set, and the sky was crisp. There weren't many visible stars--Ella was still getting used to that--but the lights from the skyscrapers never failed to dazzle her in their own way. Ella wasn't much for technology. If she wanted to mark this moment, she would need to do it on memory. So she did. She took everything in--the lights, the sky, the sounds from the restaurant, the full feeling, and, of course, Logan--and then she closed her eyes. With them closed, she did her best to memorize what she'd seen and heard and felt, so that if she wanted it, she could pull it back up and relive how she felt in this moment.

When her eyes finally relaxed and opened, they found Logan staring at her with a particularly amused smile. Ella smiled back instinctively. This time, she didn't have to ask what he was staring at. He offered the answer on his own. "I can't believe you're here with me," he said, like she had given him some wonderful gift.

That was silly, of course. He had taken her out on a date--a perfect one, at that. All she'd done was try and keep up. But she kept her smile anyway, and slid her hands into his, squeezing tight. As though she could convince him of that fact through grip strength alone. "I can't imagine anything better," she told him, hoping that covered what her hands could not. He laughed, and dropped one hand so he could hold the other while they walked toward the park.

[dcmultiverse]

LUCIFER (2016–2021) - 2.01 • "Everything's Coming Up Lucifer"

[sedativeunderskins]

julian had flipped out and gone off of owen, landon and sophia after they found out that summer was going to die. all of them had stormed out of the hospital but both landon and owen had decided to get drunk together at a bar and they hadn’t planned on stopping until they were passed out or dead. both of them knew neither one of them should have been driving but they didn’t care. owen was driving and landon was next to him, they had the music blaring and they continued to drink even in the car. before they could even react owen swerved to avoid another car and he lost control as the car swerved off the road while they were crossing a bridge over the lake. landon his head head on the window and knocked himself out but owen was still awake when the car landed in the lake and began to sink. owen panicked as the car filled with water and he tried to shake landon awake but he wouldn’t wake up. he did his best to try and pull landon, but landon was dead weight and owen didn’t know if he would be able to pull landon out of the water. the car filled completely and owen didn’t know how long he could hold his breath but he used all of the strength he could and pulled landon out of the car window. it was hard for owen to swim with landon who was just keeping him down. for a moment he thought that if he didn’t just let landon go, neither one of them would make it but owen refused to leave his brother to die. someone had called 911 when they saw what happened and as owen was losing oxygen trying to save landon, he started to fade too and in that moment he knew he and landon were both dead. but help came fast and owen felt himself being lifted out of the water, he was still conscious but barely, landon was still passed out and the paramedics couldn’t wake him up.

[scribare-archive]

@lovetold. starter call.

❝   i'll always come back for you.   ❞

[selfproclaimedunicorn]

I am a very serious writer who takes the craft so seriously 😊

[withoutabsolution]

“amor,” zevran tries to get ellas’ attention, his eyes trailing after her as she paces back and forth in front of him.  when he seemingly fails to do so, he pushes himself up from where he’d been lounging, half-sprawled on his back. “vamos, amor,” he sighs dramatically, seeking to sweep @dracaeons​ up into his arms for a moment, clearly trying to commandeer her focus in a more direct way. “all of this pacing, all of this worrying, it only serves your enemies, yes?” his hands come to rest at her shoulders as he searches her eyes. “one day.  one day is all i ask!  let me take you somewhere exciting, somewhere... fun!”

[thvnderbird]

'' we can take things slow. '' / @rybernia

claros brillan por la sola oración, la sola sensación de sentir que no está siendo forzada a nada ni está forzando nada, la posibilidad de hacer solo lo que quiere hacer y no lo que quieren que haga. “lo sé.” dice en el tono de voz adecuado para que solo él la escuche. “no estoy haciendo nada que no quiera hacer...¿tú sí?”

[devilsmenu]

“once upon a time…” (ella and chad)

"No, please" Chad said with a sigh. "I've already come in a place with all of the fairytales, my mom said a lot of her own fairytale, and I just want to run away from this shit".

[finestmoment]

“well, my shift is over in five minutes. we can meet on the dock and ride on my daddy's boat. i promise it'll be worth every second.”

[cass1x1]

“ you want to kiss me, don’t you? “ - princely bros / “ you have no idea how much i love you, do you? " - elogan / “ tell me it isn’t true. “ “ i can’t. “ mars x arin

“ you want to kiss me, don’t you? “ - princely bros

There were times when Fredrick suspected telling Eric of his feelings had been a mistake.

Well, no

That was a misleading statement. See, it implied that there were times when Fredrick didn't suspect that telling Eric of his feelings had been a mistake. Fredrick suspected telling Eric of his feelings was a mistake at all times. And, really, it wasn't a suspicion. It was knowledge. To start over:

Fredrick knew, at all times, that telling Eric of his feelings had been a mistake.

Of course, at the time, his reasoning had made some sense. First of all, it was best to enter into a living arrangement with an honest foundation. Lying would get them nowhere. Second of all, he'd been rather clear on this front: I have developed feelings for you, but I have no intention of acting on them was more or less what he'd said. Kissing would be acting, and he'd already declared his intention to abstain from doing so. Third, and perhaps most important of all, they hadn't really intended on saying it. He'd gone through rationalizing telling Eric and rationalizing bottling it up because it was supposed to be fleeting and pass eventually, but ultimately, they simply said what they were feeling because they was bad at keeping feelings inside him.

And there was not even a blissful second after the words were out of his mouth where he considered that it might not have been a mistake. He knew, from that first moment, it was a mistake.

It hadn't really been awkward--Eric had handled it with precisely the aplomb that had factored into said feelings--but it was the ease with which he accepted it and changed nothing that challenged Fredrick. It would be easier to fall out of love with someone who wanted you to be out of love with them, wouldn't it? The trouble with Eric is that he didn't seem to mind. Sometimes, such as, for example, oh, say, now, he seemed to enjoy it. Relish in it. Asshole.

"I--what?" Fredrick tried to muster some indignation at the question. It wasn't precisely successful. Eric, blithely, repeated the question. Unfortunately, hearing it a second time did nothing to facilitate answering it. "What...does that have anything to do with this?" Fredrick finished lamely.

Eric stared back at them in that way he sometimes did. That peculiar way that made it hard to guess at his thoughts. Fredrick didn't try. "You don't know?"

His surprise left Fredrick uneasy. After all, he had a point. It was rare enough for Fredrick not to know something. "No, should I?" Again, a statement that was followed with immediate regrets. "You know what? Never mind. I rescind the question. I need to study and this has been an odd night, so I'm going to--" They gathered their books and swept away, grasping at any port in a storm of frustrated emotions.

“ you have no idea how much i love you, do you? " - elogan

Normally, Ella would've laughed off such words. Of course she knew she was loved. She'd always considered herself rather fortunate in that regard. And typically, Logan would mean it jokingly, an affectionate way of saying thank you for some favor or little kindness. Ella had long since acclimated to the way people used I love you to mean thank you. But something about this was different.

Perhaps it was the tone. Logan didn't sound like he was joking. His eyes were light, but they didn't have that playful twinkle she remembered so fondly from Boston. He rarely did, these days, but certainly not now. And there was weight to his voice. Intent. It didn't leave her with the impression of a light little thanks. Perhaps, too, it was the phrasing. I love you, she was used to. But the do you? made it seem--well, it didn't seem joking.

Instead of laughing, then, Ella turned to give Logan her full attention, rather than the half she'd split between him and the cash register she was helping him with. She set the money down, keeping her eyes level on his. "Logan," she began. "I love you too." There were so many other things she could say. She almost did. Ella knew how easy it was to open her mouth and just let everything tumble out--about how she'd thought of him, every now and then, in the years he'd been gone; about how she'd wondered, even before that, a vague, ineffable what if; about how she'd thought of him lately, here now and in her life, this beautiful, perfect person. "I--goodness," She laughed, then, because a laugh was something she could say, without letting all those other pieces out. She'd gotten better at that, at keeping some things close to her chest.

When she looked back up, though, he still had that unwavering stare. Eyes bright, but not teasing. Ella's stomach flipped. It felt like air was being pulled from her lungs. It's not what you think. It's just Logan. He's not--he doesn't--She'd already had this conversation with herself more times than she cared to admit. "You're sweet," she told him. "But you don't have to say anything. You know I'd help out anyway. I like to stay busy, and all that." She swallowed, and he finally looked away, and the tension she was feeling broke. She picked back up the cash, the movements quick and practiced. "I think you're at $4,000 here so far. Do you want me to keep counting?"

“ tell me it isn’t true. “ “ i can’t. “ mars x arin

It wasn't as though Arin wanted feelings. Not with anyone. Not for anyone. Not from anyone. They weren't exactly happy with their little life with Sasha, but they were something. It was something. And dating, feelings, all that--they couldn't help but feel like they would be playing with fire, letting too much of that come into their otherwise not-so-bad situation.

Not that he was exactly abstaining. He was young and cute, after all. If someone came around that they liked, someone they could have some fun with, maybe fool around a little, they didn't see the harm in that. It was once emotions and strings got involved that they became wary. So it had been between him and Mars. Feelings seemed to be cropping up, and they did what they'd gotten very good at doing in the last 5 years; they made those feelings a non-issue.

Or so they'd thought. It seemed that Mars had a different view of things. "Why can't you?" he asked, knowing it sounded petulant.

"Take a fucking guess," they snapped back. Mars was always on the sarcastic side--they had that in common--but the snapping was unusual between them. Well, it used to be. Now, it was more common.

Arin dropped his head back in frustration. Feelings. See? They were the problem. They always were. "Mars, can't we just--I dunno. Not anymore? I don't see why it has to be, like, a whole thing."

"You really want me to say it? Fine. Because you fucked up, Arin. That's why. Are you happy now?"

[otherworldlyrps]

[sedativeunderskins]

landon had just been released from the hospital and although he was ordered to stay home and rest, he ended up sneaking out with owen to find ella. “bro, we just pissed mom off, you really wanna piss her off again? dad too?” owen was driving and landon still had a splitting headache. “i don’t give a shit, i need to talk to ella...” owen shook his head and continued driving, landon directed him to the dock where ella’s dad kept his boat, it was the first place he thought to look. “do you see the boat?” owen asked as he helped his brother out of the car. “yeah, its the one on the end there...it looks like she’s on it.”

[scribare-archive]

@lovetold : [ reach ] sender desperately reaches out to receiver with both arms extended, pleading for a hug.

to know he have loved her, over and over again. to know that no matter what his father did to them, no matter how many times he tried to tear them apart, his soul would always recognize her. his heart knew hers. and it was like finally coming home. it was like taking a breath, after being held under water for a little too long. being close to her, it's like finally being able to breath freely again. finding that missing piece of his soul. ella was the one person that made sense, the one person he dared to be vulnerable with & he would have it no other way. would go to the end of the world for her, without hesitation. and when she open her arms : he is not one that can deny her anything. quick steps are taken, soundless as he near march towards her. one arm wrap around her waist, pulling her in close & the other go to the back of her head, fingers threading into her hair, leaning down and there's a kiss pressed to the crown of her head.

[topguncortez]

Are You With Me? | Ch I

| Jake Seresin x Shy!Wifey

series masterlist | next part

synopsis: Jake gets a terrifying call in the middle of the night that has him rushing to his ex-wife's side. Y/N is put in the middle of two men who she cared about. The Seresins get shocking news.

word count: 2.2k

warnings: emergency rooms, medical inaccuracies, mentions of blood, childhood cancer, fighting, divorce, mentions of cheating

“What happened?” Jake asked, out of breath as he ran down the corridor. He had just fallen asleep when he got a frantic call from his ex wife. He could hardly make out the words she was saying to him, but he managed to understand that she was taking their daughter to the ER. It was like a hot knife in Jake’s chest as he sprinted out of bed and broke nearly all traffic laws to get to the hospital. 

Y/N’s was shaking like a leaf in the wind, as she took a step away from the large window where she had been watching doctors and nurses tend to her child, “I-I don’t know,” Her voice was thick with tears, her eyes and nose red. The only thing she wore was a nightgown and a jacket over it, “Ella, sh-she has had this cough and it hasn’t gone away and she started complaining about not being able to breathe and then. . .” Y/N sucked in a deep breath, trying to slow her heart rate down, “There was so much blood.” 

“Shh, shh,” Jake pulled her into his chest, cradling the back of her head. A loud sob racked through her body, and Jake held her tighter, “Let’s go sit down, okay? I’ll get you some tea and a snack.”

Y/N nodded her head, and let Jake guide her through the hospital to the waiting room. Her body felt heavy as she collapsed in the chair. The only image flashing through her mind was of her daughter standing in the doorway of her room with blood all over her shirt. Y/N closed her eyes, rubbing them with the heel of her hand. Ella had been complaining about her chest hurting and this persistent cough that would not go away. Y/N just thought it was her being sick with the common cold. 

“Here,” Jake said, holding a foam cup and a granola bar out to his ex-wife. Y/N gingerly took the items and Jake sat down in the chair next to her. The tension stretched over them as they both sat in silence, Y/N nibbling on the granola bar and Jake fiddling with his fingers. The last time they had sat this close to one another was when they were in couples therapy. Most of the time, if they had to sit near each other, they would put one of the kids in the middle. 

“I’m sorry I called you so early,” Y/N mumbled, breaking the silence. 

Jake looked at her, a small frown on his face, “I’d rather you did than wait until morning. I know you hate doctors.”

“Had to get over that this past year.” 

A year. It had been a whole year since Jake signed those papers, and Y/N had walked out of his life. It had been a year of utter misery for the both of them, but their pride got in the way of being able to admit that. It had been a year of awkward conversations while dropping the kids off at each other’s houses. A year of avoiding each other at Dagger family events. A year of tears and aching hearts when the other mentioned going out on a date. A year of suffering because of one mistake. 

“Well, Ella is my daughter,” Jake said, sitting up in his seat, “And I am going to be here for my daughter, no matter what time it is.” 

They both agreed in the divorce to keep things as civil as they possibly could for the sake of the children. Jake didn’t fight Y/N on custody, only asking that he gets them on the weekends. Y/N still allowed Jake to come over as often as he wanted to, and he was at the house most nights. Jake hated going home to that small on-base house that was nothing compared to the beautiful craftsman they had bought together after Eli was born. Y/N let Jake stay for dinner, and help with bath time, before getting the kids to bed. It was always awkward when he’d leave for the night; both of them wanting to ask the other if they would stay. 

“I know,” Y/N swallowed, “I just. . . I don’t know.” 

The silence stretched back over them. The lobby of the emergency room was surprisingly busy for an early Tuesday morning. Drunkards were waiting to get fluids to sober up. A couple who looked like they were about to have a baby sat in the corner, the man coaxing his wife through breathing exercises. A sad looking elderly man with a deep frown etched on his face. A mother holding her child to her chest, soothing his hiccups. Y/N longed to be able to be back with Ella, but the doctors had ushered her out of the room when Ella quit breathing. 

Y/N was lost in her thoughts when a voice called out to her, “Y/N.” 

“Miles,” She stood up from her chair, “W-what’s going on? Is Ella alright?” 

“You’re my daughter’s doctor?” Jake said, eyeing Miles up and down. 

Y/N shot a glare in Jake’s direction. Now was not the time to get in a pissing match. 

“I am,” Miles said, brushing off Jake’s comment, “I was working a round in the ER when she came in. I’m also lead pediatric surgeon.” 

Rolling his eyes, Jake muttered, “Of course you are.”

“Anyway,” Miles continued, “We ran some tests on Ella, a simple blood test and then an X-Ray,” He paused for a moment, trying to gather his thoughts. Y/N’s hand reached out for Jake’s on instinct, squeezing it, “Her blood test came back showing signs of abnormal cell growth, and there’s a small mass on the right lower lobe of her lung.” 

It was as if Miles had slugged Y/N in the chest. She sat down, afraid her knees were going to give out if she were still standing. The words Miles and Jake were sharing might as well have been a world away, as none of it was making sense to her. 

“How did this happen?” Y/N asked, her voice felt foreign to her as she looked up at the men, “How did I miss this?” 

“We don’t really know,” Miles said softly, “Sometimes, the body just creates abnormal cells. Lung cancer in kids looks totally different than lung cancer in adults. It’s not your fault.” 

Y/N nodded her head and looked down at her hands, “So what do we do?” 

“We’re gonna discharge her for today, and send you home with some medicine to help suppress the cough. Then we’re gonna get you set up with an oncology appointment, run some more tests and we’ll go from there.” 

“Can we see her?” Jake asked. 

“Of course,” Miles nodded his head, and told them Ella’s room number. 

Jake sat down next to Y/N, letting out a deep sigh. This was the last thing he thought was going to happen when Y/N called him at 2:30 in the morning. The only person Jake knew to have lung cancer was his grandfather, and it was a bitter end to his life. Hospitals, and oxygen masks, and not being able to do anything but lay in a bed and wait for death to come. It wasn’t what he imagined for his little girl. Not in this lifetime. 

“You never told me what happened between you and Miles?” Jake asked, looking over at Y/N. 

She let out a sigh, stretching her arms out and flexing her fingers, “Just didn’t work out.” 

Truth was, Y/N was so irrevocably in love with Jake, that being with Miles was only going to cause more harm than good. Miles had been the perfect guy; he was respectful, kind, he cared about Y/N’s kids and treated them with respect as well. He also loved her, flaws and all. And that was the issue. Miles loved Y/N more than Y/N could ever love him. It broke her heart to have to break up with him, but she couldn’t let him continue to think that something was going to happen. 

Jake hummed, “I thought you two were going to get-” 

“Can we not talk about my love life right now?” Y/N snapped, looking at her ex, “Now is not the time.” 

“I’m sorry,” Jake apologized, “She’s going to be okay, ya know?” Y/N’s eyes filled with unshed tears, “She’s strong and healthy, just like you.” 

Y/N nodded her head, “I know. It’s just not what I want for her. I hate this!” 

Jake wrapped his arm around Y/N’s shoulder and brought her into him. He hated seeing her cry and in the past year, he had seen her shed a lot of tears. Over the years, Y/N got better at stuffing her emotions down. It was hard raising kids with a husband who flew jets at supersonic speed into dangerous territories. She had to become both mentally and physically strong to withstand the months of Jake being gone and her left to raise the kids. Now, those emotions came crumbling down. 

“Let’s go back and see her, okay?” Jake asked, pressing a kiss to Y/N’s temple. She wordlessly nodded her head and Jake stood up, helping her to her feet. 

They rode the elevator in silence up to the pediatric floor where Ella was. When the doors opened they were met with bright colored green and blue walls with various animals painted on them. Children were just starting to wake up on the floor, as nurses and aids went into their rooms with colorful cups of medicine. Some parents had spent the night, sleeping on a cot next to their child’s bed, other parents were just arriving with cups of coffee and tired looks on their faces. Y/N was surprised at how warm the unit felt. That was the one thing she hated about hospitals. They always felt so cold and lonely. But the pediatric ward was filled with bright smiles, and laughter. 

Jake knocked on the door to Ella’s room, which had a painted unicorn on it, “Knock, knock,” He said, slowly opening the door. 

“Daddy!” Ella exclaimed. Jake rushed over to the bed, and hugged his little girl tightly. He wasn’t sure if it was because of her illness, but she felt smaller in his arms than she had ever felt, “I missed you.” 

“Missed you too Ella Bella,” Jake said softly, and placed a kiss on her temple, “How are you feeling?” He helped her lay back in bed, and covered her with a blanket. Y/N silently walked to the otherside of Ella’s bed as Jake sat down on the small mattress. 

“I’m tired,” Ella yawned, “Nurse Becky gave me strawberry jell-o and Auntie Val saw me when I had my pictures done!” 

“She did?” Y/N asked, trying her best to sound happy. She made a mental note to contact her best friend and tell her how thankful she was for her visit to Ella. If there was one thing about Val Machado, it was that she was going to care of her friends’ kids. Val even said once the Seresin kids were basically her kids and vice versa. 

“Yes! She gave me a unicorn sticker! Like the one on the door!” Ella held up the sticker that was on her hospital gown. 

“That’s beautiful baby,” Jake said, his green eyes full of love as he brushed his hand over her cheek. 

“Daddy,” Ella said softly, “Can I go home now?” 

“Yes Elles,” Jake nodded his head, “We’re gonna go home. You, me, and Mommy.” 

A weird feeling went through Y/N’s chest when Jake said they were all going home. She tried her best to ignore it, knowing that Jake was only saying words to comfort their daughter. When a nurse came in, Y/N and Jake excused themselves to go sign some paperwork and set up the next doctor’s appointment. They sat on opposite sides of a round table, Jake filling out insurance forms while Y/N sighed Ella’s discharge forms. 

“You shouldn’t have told her that you were coming home,” Y/N muttered. 

Jake furrowed his eyebrows, “Why? I am coming home with you guys.” 

“Jake,” Y/N sighed, setting the pen down. 

“No,” Jake answered, “I am not just gonna go back to base and pretend like everything is fine and dandy. Cause it’s not fine and dandy, Y/N. Our child is sick.”

“I know,” Y/N’s voice became thick with tears, “I know this, Jake.” 

“Then don’t push me away,” Jake sounded defeated, “Not now. Not when we need each other the most.” 

Y/N let out a shaky sigh, “I just don’t know if I can forgive you.” 

“You don’t have to,” Jake said, getting up from his chair and going over to kneel in front of his wife. He grabebd her hands in his, running his thumbs over the back of them, “You don’t have to forgive me now or ever. But you need someone to rely on and be there just as much as I need someone to rely on and be there. This isn’t going to be easy. . . but we are the only ones who will understand what we are going through. We need each other right now.” 

Y/N bit her lip and nodded her head, “Okay.” 

“Okay?” Jake asked, his eyes full of hope and longing. 

“Okay,” Y/N said again, sniffling, “Let’s go take our baby home.”

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