#DM if interested but it will be first come first serve so no promises

[fidgetspringer]

I'm a little tight on cash atm, and i've got some trips coming up. So if anyone's been interested in commissioning me I might have an open slot or two over the next month 👀

[blyszczopies]

I’m now taking commissions for animated pagedolls like these for 70$!

Animated in a wobbly way, reminiscent if the Generation 5 Pokemon sprites. Perfect to use as a decoration for your blog theme or a personal website!

If you’re interested, please read the terms of service and how to contact me under the read more.

Terms of service:

I take payment through Paypal and I take it upfront; I will not sketch your commission unless you have paid at least half of the price. No refunds if I’m already past the sketch phase. Do not order a commission if you are not sure if you can afford one.

These are not first come first serve. I claim the right to decline a commission for any reason.

I do not work with deadlines. I will do my best to finish your commission as quickly as possible, but I can not promise to get it done in specified time. Keep in mind I've got a part-time job offline, too.

I will send you WIP images of your commission as I work on it, to make sure you’re satisfied with the final product.

The owner of the character featured in the commissioned drawing is allowed to use and repost their commission, preferably with proper credit. The commissioned image is only for personal use of the commissioner or the person who owns the character(s) from the drawing.

I claim the right to post a commission publicly. However, upon requests I can keep the commissioner anonymous or refrain from posting their commission online.

I will draw: Quadruped and anthropomorphic animals and fantasy creatures; Original characters and real-life pets; Characters based off a description, if no image is available; Complex designs and several characters in a single image (for an additional fee); Mature themes (blood, gore, nudity, substance abuse, etc)

I will not draw: Humans and highly humanoid characters; Artwork promoting bigotry; Pornography

I might draw: Fanart/fandom characters. Just ask if I would draw characters from a specific media you have on your mind! Same goes for anything not explicitly mentioned here.

By commissioning me you agree to my terms of service. If interested, you can contact either DM me here on tumblr or send me an email to timo666dlugiewlosy(at)gmail.com with everything I could use while working on your commission: reference images, descriptions, various kinds of inspiration sources. Feel free to ramble about the thing you would like me to draw! That will greatly help me get an idea of what I could create for you. ^___^ Please also specify what type of commission you're interested in!

I have several OCs and designs up for sale as well.

Thank you so much for taking your time to read this! Have a great day!

[yandereworlds]

YCH YANDERE COMMISSIONS! 🎉

Hey!! So, if you read my post here, you're likely aware that I recently reached 3000+ and as part of the celebration, I promised to do some special YCH commissions for you guys, so here it is!

Basically, it's first come first serve for each photo, so come get them while their fresh! I'll happily be drawing your guys OC's and I'm excited to see who's interested! (Also, I'd just like to mention, for the first photo, it's flat colors, but it'll be properly shaded once someone buys it as the finished product.)

If you're someone that's interested, either leave a comment or DM me personally and we can discuss the details, so I can draw your OC. Thank you again for the continued support and feel free to reach out for any questions!

All Yanderes - CLOSED!

Lukas - OPEN!

Dae-Hyun - CLOSED!

[holdmytesseract]

I promised you guys a brand new Daryl series, and well... Here it is!

I proudly present to you...

moodboard by @chennqingg | divider by @fictive-sl0th 🖤

Biker!Daryl Dixon x fem!Reader | No Outbreak AU

General Warnings (for now): age gap (Daryl is 32, Y/N is 23), angst - quite a lot, drama - also a lot, alcohol & smoking, fluff, strip club? nudity, suggestive stuff, a lot of music/musical inspiration, horses?

Some chapters will be 18+! MDNI! Smut - not entirely graphic, but definitely there. It's gonna get really hot, guys - for my writing circumstances.

Side Note: Daryl might be a bit OOC in this. It's an AU, so... 🫣

Masterlist coming soon...

Bikes, cigarettes & sex - a lifestyle Daryl Dixon had embraced since he was a teenager.

With being taught from childhood on that love is nothing but a weakness, foolish, and for losers, he had successfully locked his heart and threw away the key. The redneck playboy from Georgia never entertained the thought of committing to another person. Occasional flings, strip clubs, and one-night-stands served to scratch that primal itch inside him. He didn't care about broken hearts and dreams - not even when he stumbled upon you on one of his bike trips through the USA. You were like every other woman before...

... until you weren't.

First chapter will be posted on December 6th!

I fully blame 'Ride' for the existence of this series. Oh, and this song...

I couldn't withstand the temptation to write such a story, and what can I say? I absolutely love it. There's a lot coming your way! 🧡 41k words and counting...

Since this series will get its own taglist, please let me know if you want to be tagged! This is the unofficial 'sign up' post. Just write a comment! A DM or an ask is, of course, completely alright as well! ☺️

Tagging you guys from my Daryl taglist, 'cause you might be interested in this... @angelwings-crossbowstrings @belitoxx @lou12346789 @fictive-sl0th @marvelcasey05 @loz-3 @mischief-dream @whore4romance @stitchintimefan @bigbaldheadname @making-the-most-0f-it @erebus-et-eigengrau @km-ffluv @0-aubrie0 @sweetz1919 @mikaela-granger @secretsicanthideanymore @dilfdixon @txtttttttttttttt @dixons-sunshine @stiveroon @cakesandtom @mayday2007

I can't wait to get this series started - together with all of you! I'm SO excited! This project means a lot to me. 🧡

[sodaneko]

LALECHINGO!! ; a birthday event

˚₊· ͟͟͞͞➳❥ it’s bingo! and also a raffle.

let’s party!! one thing about me is that is love a little event and since it’s my birthday month i felt like hosting one :3c

so: raffle time! but you gotta play some bingo first before you can participate. lemme give you a rundown on how it works.

what's the prize?

✰ a total of three 1k (or longer) fics from me! i don’t take requests so this is a rare chance to see something specific written by me ✰ the 3 winners will receive a wishlist form from me in which they can go wild ✰ haikyuu x reader only! gender of reader is for the winners to decide, i’ll write for all of them. ✰ not limited to sfw only (that being said: mdni)

details & rules (it looks like a lot, but i promise it's easy)

✰ to participate in the raffle, you gotta fill out the bingo cards! there’s ten of them in total at the end of this post. some are writing prompts, some are for reading, some to spread some kindness. you can grab and combine any that catch your interest.

✰ 1 bingo equals 1 point. if you manage to fill out an entire card, you’ll get 10 points, so 10x your name in the draw pot for the raffle. this means you can get up to 100 points in total if you fill out all ten cards completely.

✰ it’s not first come, first serve! you got two weeks to have fun with your bingo cards.

✰ this event is mostly about making fandom a little better for everyone, whether you’re a writer or a reader, no matter how you participate in it. this means you don’t have to show me proofs how you got these bingos. putting my trust in you that you won’t cheat <3

✰ since the prizes are gonna be fics by me, i would feel better knowing you actually like my works enough to follow me. however, it’s not a must to be a follower to participate. again, it’s more about fandom than me.

✰ writers picking up the writing prompts: it up to you how you use them! can be drabbles or headcanons, small fics, big fics, moodboards, not limited to haikyuu only. really whatever sparks your inspiration. you don’t even have to publish it or tag me in it (though i’d love to see ofc hehe), this is for YOU and your inspiration.

✰ do NOT bring any ai into this. i'll rip you to shreds

✰ once you’re finished, either reblog this post with your bingo cards or send me an ask with them (i won’t publish them, just for me to keep track)

✰ i’ll draw & announce the three winners on Jan 27th and will contact them through dms for their wishlist :3

card 1-6 ; for the writers

card 7 & 8 ; for the readers

card 9 & 10 ; for the kindness

that's all! have fun ♡ - Lale

[brf-rumortrackinganon]

I’m confused…. So SHE is restocking and the deal is still HAPPENING?

😵‍💫

It's all PR and semantics - if you're getting confused, that means her plan is working.

So let's dig into it.

Meghan's team is now hinting that the As Ever products will be restocked. That's really what the quote is: "But while the As Ever team has hinted online that the items will be back on sale soon, Meghan also wants to take a step back, gather data from the launch, and figure out exactly what As Ever could be."

Note that that text is linked to this Instagram post:

Suggesting that Meghan's PR is justifying a restock with this vague confirmation of new products.

But new products is not a restock. Hinting is not confirmation.

Which leads to a second source of confirmation: an exclusive to Vanity Fair in which they said "that products for [Meghan's] As Ever brand will be restocked on her website soon."

But soon is not a specific measurable unit of time. Soon can mean anything. I mean, I've been promising y'all updated timelines soon for 6-8 months, and I actually haven't done any work on it.

Now consider these excerpts from the interview:

Meghan also points out that Netflix is not just a financial backer. The company’s consumer packaged goods team works closely with Meghan’s team to manufacture the products. “We are on calls daily, working through product development, SKUs, and inventory,” she says. “We have a field trip tomorrow to look at different manufacturers and suppliers as we expand the brand.”

and

There are some clues about what new items might be in the pipeline. Meghan’s trademark application for her brand includes things like cookbooks, tableware, cutlery, and serving ware. “I want to really focus on the hospitality angle of As Ever, but as we take the learnings, we can understand what the customer’s needs are seasonally,” she says.

None of this actually says or describes work to restock the products. If As Ever actually were planning to restock, they wouldn't be focusing on product development, brand expansion, and new manufacturers. They'd be on the phone demanding current manufacturers get their act together and restock.

Two last wrinkles in this:

First, this update from the Fast Company writer:

"products may be restocked in the future." Not products will be restocked. May, which is a measurement of probability. Like "it may rain tonight." It could rain, or it could not rain. Meghan could choose to restock her products, or Meghan could choose not to restock her products. May is vague and it is not definite. It's the word you use to hedge your bets.

Second, there hasn't been a reason for why As Ever hasn't been restocked. Don't you think that if she hasn't restocked for legitimate business reasons, like supply chain issues or manufacturer delays, her PR would be all over that like white on rice? Just all the attention she could've gotten, crying to People and her podcast about how she's just a new female CEO who just wants to support her fans but big mean manufacturing CEOs are keeping her down?

It's the same phenomenon as her products selling out in 45 minutes - all that product sold out that fast, and the website didn't crash? With all that interest she and her fans are claiming?

Yeah, it's bunk. It's Meghan playing semantics and word games hoping no one is smart enough to pay attention to the details.

I'm not totally sure what your comment about "the deal is still happening" is for, but I think you're commenting about the DM's throwaway that they've independently confirmed Netflix is renewing their contract but without Harry, right?

I can't really speak to that because I can't get to the article - it's behind the DM's paywall, archive.org can't generate a screenshot, and I can't access archive.today links on my devices. But I've seen enough that I believe the DM is quoting "sources." In other words, they haven't actually named anyone.

And until someone is actually and specifically named, or the press release comes from Netflix itself, don't put any stock behind it. For all we know, the DM's "sources" is Meghan and Meghan's hotmail herself (which has actually happened before in the not-so-distant past) trying to manifest a done deal -- the same way she tried to manifest Megxit as a done deal for half in/half out, the same way she tried to manifest the Spencer tiara for her wedding, the same way she tried to manifest being besties with Kate.

Until someone's real, legit, actual name is attached to the scoop, it is imaginary hearsay.

[cq-studios]

(I’ve made a post about this before but hey, I have more followers now so here we go again)

About 3 years ago I made a Kingdom Hearts MAP Call and it has not been getting a lot of traction… or at least not a lot of people are joining, so I’m making a new post about it!

So starting with the basics, because I know MAPs aren’t necessarily common around these parts…

What is a MAP?

MAP stands for Multi Animator Project.

It’s essentially when a group of animators come together to make an animated video (normally a music video). Sometimes they’re scripted (like this one), sometimes you’re free to do whatever you’d like (so long as it’s within the rules), and most of them are fandom or OC based.

This MAP in particular is a PMV (Picture Music Video) MAP. Which means there’s not much, if any, actual animation involved.

When I opened this MAP, I wasn’t confident I’d be able to find enough KH animators so specifically made it single frame PMV (with camera movement or tweening, both of which I could help with if you’re not comfortable).

That means helping out with this project would just be like drawing a single art piece.

Does that interest you at all?

If so, here’s the MAP call on YouTube

(it shows you what part of the song goes along with each part in the script)

And speaking of the script,

Here’s a link to that and the rules

You can apply here (in DMs or replies), on YouTube (by making a comment), or on Discord (using the server)

If you have any other questions feel free to ask me! I promise I don’t bite lol

Thank you for considering ^^

[misspeacecraft]

So, at the beginning of this year I made a big decision with my family: we moved out of Oklahoma to a safer, bluer state. This isn't to moralize of course, just for context.

I'm currently unemployed while I look for work, which means we are broke as sin and staying in a hotel at the moment. So about the only trade I can ply right now is writing.

In the interests of this, I'd like to open commissions to more than just my patrons. Its pretty simple, I consider myself capable of a lot:

General Info

- SFW Price: $20/1k words (if conversion is needed, we can do that math)

- NSFW Price: $30/1k words (conversion as above)

- Stipulations: The only hard stipulation is that commissions should be self contained shorts, but they can be sequels to previous shorts. For NSFW commissions, I reserve the right to say no if something I would be uncomfortable putting to pen.

- Exclusivity: this can be discussed per commission, but I want you to have that control over what you buy.

- First come first serve, in so far as I'll review proposals for a slot in the order I get them.

And, of course, some examples. First are two commissions I've already finished:

And a non-worm piece I'm very proud of, to prove that I can do more than parahumans I promise!

You can DM me here, or on Discord (same name). And remember: I love you.

[elphilim]

>> To the one anon who send me this ask about posting a promo and me having so less interactions etc.:

PS: long post! But it's kinda important, cause there is some parts in the tumblr rpc that also annoys me pretty much.

Yeah I know I could post a promo and maybe it would attract more followers etc. and I would have done so already if I wanted to do this. But the fact is, I don't. I barely have time to engage with the people I'm already writing with and those are really not many.

I mean just look at my tracker, there are once again threads who haven't been answered since the beginning of May and we have June now.

Ofc I'm not closed to new people, if anyone stumbles over my blog and wants to interact or if I stumble over a blog I find interesting, I still follow (back) and write with them. But I try to keep my list small, not just for my sanity but also because I know, just because you have a lot of mutuals doesn't mean you have many interactions. For most of them you're just a number to make their followerlist look bigger and I'm not interested in being food for people's ego...

I mean right now I follow 19 people, 25 are following me and out of them I'm actively writing with only 8 and out of those 8 people it's like only 2-3 who really like and comment my stuff or talk ooc with me, without waiting for me to make the first step (not judging or blaming anyone here, only stating facts)

I have 8 threads, 31 drafts, my inbox: empty, activity: almost every day at 0; sometimes I get a like or a comment but that's it, DMs: you can hear crickets chirping and if you want to write there you first have to dust off the chat. My notifications almost never go over 5 per week. It happenes almost every time that I come on here and I got nothing: No dm, no ask, no like, no comment, no nothing. And if I do have more than this, I can be sure the bots have found me again...

And still I barely have any time to answer to this 8 threads like once a week or get to post the 31 drafts I have saved. It's not like I'm drowning in stuff to do here on tumblr, that I get so much stuff to answer to or anything like that and still, I'm happy if I manage to answer to everyone's thread at least once a month or write the starters I promised in the same month.

Do I wish people would engage more around here, sure I do. Who isn't happy when people show interest in something you created and stuff. But it is what it is, you can't force people to do so and it's also not fair to ask for more interaction, if you yourself can't do much either.

I always say: "You get what you give."

If you give much but won't get anything in return: Stop giving. But if you don't give anything yourself, don't be surprised if you don't get anything either.

The one thing I'm mostly dissapointed here on tumblr is, that everyone here kinda sits back and wait for the others to make the first step and then complain when no one does it. I see a lot people here on tumblr complaining about this, and with each one of them I always ask myself "Yeah I get it, but how much did you gave first?" You don't get to lean back and put your feet up, waiting for the sun to shine upon you and then complain cause everyone else is doing the same.

I get it, it's annoying if it's you who always has to be the one to write the first dm, to send all the ideas or pitching plots. It's frustrating if you always have to be the one to write starters and don't get them back or the one to reblogg, like, comment and send asks etc. while everyone around you is kinda like just sit there waiting and only respond to what you give them. There I can understand people complaining, that everyone else is just waiting to get served.

But in a community as broken as the rpc seems to be someone has to be the "bigger guy" and suck it up and idk start somehow. Otherwise you won't get anything started at all. Over time you learn who of your mutuals appriciate you and your efforts and who you can just drop again. I prefer to make the first steps, hoping that something like a friendship builds between us, than to be yet another person who just sits back and waits for the world to do all the work for you. There are still people here on tumblr who, when they see the effort you give to them, they give the same effort back to you again. You just have to find them which can take very long and be very exhausting, but they're still around here.

I mean sure, beside the threads I sometimes send in memes or asks, or comment, like or reblogg stuff from others, but again I can't force anyone to do the same.

But don't get this wrong: I'm fine with doing the first step and I'm also very patient. But if this continues and it's ALWAYS me to make the first step, at one point I'll be dropping you again. I always observe my mutuals a little. I observe who makes the effort to write to me first every now and then or who only waits and replies when I write first. I see who comes to me of their own accord, checking on me, sending stuff in, throwing ideas at me etc. and who doesn't. I see exactly who only seems to be interested if I was the one to write first and then just forgets about me again if I don't. At a certain point, my patience will run out too and I'll stop sending you stuff. If even more time passes and you still don't get your arse in gear, I'll unfollow you again. It's that simple. I'm fine with doing the first step, I'm fine with reaching out and interact first. But I'm not stupid and I won't waste my time on people who just take and won't give.

As I said: I'm not here to feed people's ego. No matter how cool your blog or how special your muse is.

[michaels-reality]

ANNOUNCING MARCH COMMISSIONS

5 Full Body slots available! First come first serve

Sketch slots unlimited

Please DM if interested or you have any questions :)

Will do Won't Do and TOS under the cut

Will do :

- Humans/Humanoids

- Furries and Anthros

- Selfship

- Moderate Gore/Blood

- Suggestive art and Nudity

Won't do :

- Detailed Mechs

- Ferals and certain non humanoid characters

- NSFW of minors and any pr*ship content

- Hate speech and calls for violence

- Inc*st

TERMS OF SERVICE

I reserve the right to refuse any commission for any reason without question.

I will not accept explicit sexual commissions, but suggestive and partial nudity will be considered.

Clients are not permitted, under any circumstances, to use any part of their commissioned artwork for non fungible tokens. Use of the artwork for any advertising or profits associated with non fungible tokens or cryptocurrency is strictly prohibited.

I reserve the right to display the commissioned piece on my website(s), online galleries, and in my portfolios. (If the character is an original character, you will be credited accordingly). If there is any issue with the display of personal commissions, please clarify or contact the artist to remove the artwork from public platforms.

You may use the commissioned work for personal use only (this includes avatars, signatures, wallpapers, etc.), but credit must be given.

I reserve the rights to the artwork, so you may not use the commissioned work for any projects (commercial or nonprofit) without express permission, nor redistribute the artwork as your own.

Using artwork for teaching any Artificial or Neural Network without permission is strictly prohibited. If given permission, you may not claim the artwork as yours or leave images uncredited to the source.

Other General Rules

If you want your commission done within a certain time then there is no way I can promise that. If you have a time frame (like for a birthday present etc.) then I will try to get it done on time. If you pay for a big commission though, please do not expect me to get it done on your time.

Refunds are possible during the sketch phase and mid lineart. After lineart is done I will not be taking refunds.

Please try to be specific as possible when commissioning me. Give posing, expressions, designs, etc. If you’d like me to take creative liberties you can tell me.

You can even tell me if you’d like a specific style that I’ve drawn in before because I have plenty! If not I will just draw how I usually draw.

Having a flexible budget when commissioning me helps because prices may change based on the complexity of what you are asking of me. Just a heads up!

[sgiandubh]

Hello how are you? I follow several shippers' blogs and I noticed that every now and then some bloggers publish hateful messages they received. My question is about mental health: how do you deal with it? I understand that your presence here is relatively recent, but have you ever regretted something?

Dear Mental Health Anon,

This is the kind of submissions I welcome with all my heart, because they are benevolent and witty. Forgive me already for what I suspect will be a long answer. It is not the pleasure of hearing me talk that prompts them, but the sincere intention to answer deserving asks as clearly, fully and honestly as I can.

The short answer is : I am fine, Fall is slowly coming and nights are starting to be really chilly. There's some light rain tapping on the roof of my flat and I will spend my week-end wandering around some of my favorite places on Earth. And now, onwards to the consistent and interesting ask of yours...

The worst trolling message I have ever seen in this fandom is the one I am immediately going to post below, because I think it should serve us all as warning and reminder. It was posted on a blog I have been reading from the beginning of my long lurking days on Tumblr: @cb4tb is one of the most balanced and articulate people in this corner of the Internet. I remember being shocked by its cold and very coherent violence. The feat of a casebook sociopath, who thinks her asks in Spanish (I am 200% certain about it) and who has an appalling command of English grammar. Written on Christmas' Eve and on purpose:

Compared to the alarming slander @cb4tb got (whatever for is a mystery, she is non conflictual and posts very witty business insights) on a day that should be completely taboo for every civilized human being (you don't need to believe in God to respect one of Christianity's most important celebrations), whatever hate I could get in here is definitely subpar. Most of it did not make it on my page and went straight to the bin. But it's not always easy: I am as human as you, Anon, and sometimes I feel personally insulted and revolted by the smugness and pettiness of it all. However, I must immediately add their hate never made me give up an inch of my convictions. They are the result of a long interval of watching and pondering, coupled with my own observations I gladly share with like-minded women all around the world. That often hits a nerve or bruises overinflated egos on the Other Side. So be it: I am not here to be meek and obedient, if I never was meek and obedient in real life. I am here to bring clarity and build trust, which incidentally resonates very closely to what I do for a living. That probably rates me as a moderate on the shipper spectrum, in the sense that by complete design I put aside some divisive topics I firmly chose not to discuss. I am not interested to bring attention on me, in here, and the least thing I'd like is to be a vector of discord. So that would also rate me as a peacemaker of sorts - and yes, that sounds perhaps pretentious, but I believe it is needed, especially now.

I only felt a clear intention to threaten me twice, both in DM. The first time it curiously came from one extreme fringe of the shipper community and I brushed it off, because it was an empty, almost ridiculous threat. I politely denied and that was it - two persons blocked me and there were no other consequences to it. The second time, an anti came to confront me on an irrelevant point, with a very aggressive undertone. I blocked and almost forgot about it. If you have it clear enough in your mind that such things cannot be avoided and, at the same time, you know that your own moral compass is not compromised, these details will not affect you. At all. I confidently promise you that. Last but not least: if you are not great with compartmentalizing, don't step in the arena. It can seriously ruffle your self-esteem and it's not worth it.

So this is how I deal with it: I focus on what I have to say (does it bring something new? interesting? positive? thought-provoking?), on the way of saying it (above all, be kind and gracious to every other shipper) and on the right moment to say it (only when I am honestly sure I can do it with no unwanted consequences). But I will stand in solidarity with any shipper (any single one of them) who is humiliated, belittled or disparaged, with not a single shred of fear in the world. And I would also fend for myself if necessary, if I am getting over-the-top slander: all the other yapping, I ignore. Sometimes (often, even) it's more interesting to watch.

And if anything else fails, I go for a long drive and have a coffee at the seaside or simply open a book or listen to some Bach or call Someone. Or take this little big guy out for a lazy walk in the park:

You ask me if I regret anything. Absolutely not. I have received more than I could ever give, in here. I have met spectacular women and men, I have grown very fond of and feel very close to. I have had the immense satisfaction of sharing their secrets, their worries, their plans and this means trust, in my book, for which I will never tire saying how grateful I am. I also strived to respond in kind and I mean to honor this unwritten contract. Last but not least, I have watched this community slowly dusting off months of sadness and perhaps starting to open up again.

And all of this makes me damn proud of who we are, Anon. Thank you for dropping by! You are always welcome on my page.

[blyszczopies]

10$ small drawing commissions! Very fast turnaround, get one or two now!!

Terms of service and how to contact me under the read more:

Terms of service:

I take payment through Paypal and I take it upfront; I will not sketch your commission unless you have paid at least half of the price. No refunds, do not order a commission if you are not sure if you can afford one.

These are not first come first serve. I claim the right to decline a commission for any reason.

I do not work with deadlines. I will do my best to finish your commission as quickly as possible, but I can not promise to get it done in specified time. Keep in mind I've got a part-time job offline, too.

This is an artistic liberty kind of commission, meaning that I will not send you any sketches for approval before finishing the drawing. However, if necessary, I will make minor edits free of charge.

The owner of the character featured in the commissioned drawing is allowed to use and repost their commission, preferably with proper credit. The commissioned image is only for personal use of the commissioner or the person who owns the character(s) from the drawing.

I claim the right to post a commission publicly. However, upon requests I can keep the commissioner anonymous or refrain from posting their commission online.

I will draw: Quadruped and anthropomorphic animals and fantasy creatures; Original characters and real-life pets; Characters based off a description, if no image is available; Complex designs and several characters in a single image (for an additional fee); Mature themes (blood, gore, nudity, substance abuse, etc)

I will not draw: Humans and highly humanoid characters; Artwork promoting bigotry; Pornography

I might draw: Fanart/fandom characters. Just ask if I would draw characters from a specific media you have on your mind! Same goes for anything not explicitly mentioned here.

By commissioning me you agree to my terms of service. If interested, you can either DM me here on tumblr or send me an email to timo666dlugiewlosy(at)gmail.com with everything I could use while working on your commission: reference images, descriptions, various kinds of inspiration sources. Feel free to ramble about the thing you would like me to draw! That will greatly help me get an idea of what I could create for you. ^___^ Also please specify what kind of commission you're interested in!

I'm also open for animated pagedoll commissions and I have several OCs and designs up for sale!

Thank you so much for taking your time to read this! Have a great day!

[horrid-mothlegs]

Hello fellow creatures!!

My finals shall soon be over and I would like to stay active and busy this summer to stave off the Horrors, so I would like to draw your kintypes/theriotypes/OCs/fursonas/pets/whatever the fuck :)

Some caveats:

It's not first come first serve, I'll draw whatever interests me most

I cannot draw people, feel free to request humans/humanoids but no promises on whether or not I'll draw it/draw it well

I may or may not colour, line and/or shade depending on my mood

It's totally free, please send me an ask/dm with a reference and/or a description :) feel free to give specifics on pose/setting/etc! I love instructions lmao

[2kpigs]

Update :D

I decided to take the rest of the year off from posting to schedule pigs for January! My new year's resolution is to be more consistent in posting but I don't know how that's going to go.

In other news...

I was asked if I was interested in doing adoptables (basically an OC design you can buy)! I've never ventured into that territory as I feel dirty for receiving money for my art (I know that's dumb if people are willing to pay but brain stupid dumb-dumb idiot sometimes) and I've only done commissions (sort of) once or twice. I'm debating it! (I sort of feel like it would be selling out but I have bills to pay ;-;)

Basic info:

I'd need to do a bit more research. Right now I would estimate the price to be around 10–30€, depending on the design. I'm not sure how I feel about bidding, so they would probably be first come, first served. I would use some of my previous designs, possibly altering them because some of the current pigs are very rushed, along with new ones. I obviously would not use other people's OCs that I've drawn as pigs or existing characters. The buyer would be able to change the species, as it is their character after buying. I could throw in some emote-style doodles in addition.

If you have any tips or opinions feel free to send me an ask or dm me :)

(A positive result is not a promise to do them! I am lazy!! I may not have enough brain power for this!!! No promises!!!!)

[hekates-corner]

Apothecary Diaries | WN Translation | Arc 9 - Chapter 8

Hello, however you found this: Welcome!

For a number of reasons I ended up here - relaying all that happens in the chapters, playing wine-aunt, as I translate to the best of my abilities.

So, be warned that all the spoilers are below. If you'd like to get spoiled, but less? My dm's/asks are open!

If you're here for the first time, here's Chapter 1 | Masterlist here.

Part 2 of the corn mini arc, as promised. Enjoy!

Cornfield Pt. 2

Narrator-Mao directs us right back to where we left off: What does it mean, she wonders, her head still tilted, as she walks through the village.

In short, this is a peaceful, barren village. There are no stores, it’s almost self-sufficient with the exception of peddlers coming every ten days or so, or that’s what’s being said.

The villagers are friendly people. It doesn’t look like they’re doing anything wrong.

Maybe it’s all just the misunderstanding of a child and their own imagination that is at fault, she thinks.. but there was a man that was even more blunt than her.

“Oni-san, you make a grim/stern face, smile smile.” Chue nags Lahan’s brother.

He narrowed his eyes as he looked around at the fields of the village - in his hand was a cloth type bag, filled with seed potatoes.

Despite having said himself that this is just a reconnaissance mission, he’s actually here to spread the word about new crops. He has them with him because they’re supposed to serve as a bit of a motivator for those interested in growing new crops.

He’s an ordinary man with a paradox/contradiction - he denies being a farmer, yet he is sincere about farming.

Narrator-Mao’s like “If I say normal, I mean normal.” because there’s eldest sons everywhere that don’t want to take over the family business.. but she’s afraid that if she were to bring that up, he’d get mad.

She goes on to note that it would’ve been more efficient for them to act separately with her going about asking questions, but she can’t do that. Even in this prefecture the spirit of men vs women is strong and people don’t like it when female outsiders act all bossy and go about their own lives. Even if she had an escort it would be useless, because she’s Maomao.

In her head she’s like “Chue-san does move on her own, however.”

Chue went elsewhere because she had other work to do and although she has her quirks in her personality, since she’s someone Suiren approves of, Maomao doesn’t think she’ll mess up.

Narrator-Mao then notes that she should be fine guiding Lahans brother and Basen through the interrogations. “Even without her guidance, Lahan-nii will do whatever Maomao wants him to do” xD

Farmer A: “Insect damage, huh?”

Lahan-nii: “Yeah/Oh. Wasn’t it bad last year?”

Farmer A: “Mmh/Well, insects cause damage every year. Of course it happened last year, and there was a lot of damage, but we managed it somehow - it’s also thanks to my lord and master that I can eat like this without starving.”

Narrator-Mao wonders if “Lord” is referring to Gyokuen before relating to us that while there had been a lot of insect damage, damage from locusts wasn’t as severe.

Lahan-nii: “Hmm. Well, I’d like to ask you another question. Who cultivates/grows that field over there?”

Farmer A: “That one? Ah, that’s Nenshin's field. He’s an old man who lives in the house at the edge of the village over there. There’s a shrine next door, so you’ll know right away.”

Lahan-nii “Thank you, I understand.”

Farmer A: “No (awkward no), I told you, but are you really going to meet him?”

Lahan-nii: “That’s my intention.”

Farmer A: “Hmm, that’s fine.. However, I think that old man will be a little confused/embarrassed.. Well, he’s not a bad person, so if you don’t mind, that’s fine.”

Narrator-Mao notes how strange that way of phrasing things was.

Maomao makes her way to where they were told to go.

Lahan-Nii’s like “Excuse me.” because Maomao’s tugging on his clothes, then he asks what’s up. She, in turn, inquires why he’s interested in that field.. and he’s like “Can’t you see it? Only that field over there is beautiful.” - poor Maomao can only say “Is it beautiful?”

It’s probably an adjective that would be more pleasant if used for something other than a field, but his face is completely serious.

He goes on. “Although everything else is sloppy, that field is neatly divided. The wheat is well treaded, and the seedlings look strong.” - Maomao then says “Is that so…” (it’s that questioning japanese tone without it being a flat out question)

It does look like that to Narrator-Mao as well, if you were to ask her, but she’s just not really interested in wheat.

She goes on thinking that snake’s beard probably doesn’t grow around here. The wheat connection reminds her of herbal medicine - which “by the way” has no connection with wheat and instead refers to the roots of the plant called snake’s beard. (it’s also referred to as wheatman which is the wheat connection)

Maomao in her head is also noting that there aren’t many plants growing around here in general.

It seems that she’s facing a chronic shortage of crude drugs.. and since she’d become a court lady and was a apothecary, her reaction to that is.. great (yeh she has withdrawal)

She thinks “medicine, I really want to see medicine” and as she’s thinking about it she’s starting to have some sorta attack and her breathing gets rough.

Lahan-nii gets totally freaked out and worried by that, saying “Oy, oy, are you alright? You’re really pale.” and Maomao stutters out that she’s sorry and that it’s not a big deal-

But Narrator-Mao keeps the sentence going “But I want to see medicine. I want to smell it. At this point it could even be poison.”

If there was any herbal medicine nearby, would it be from the carefree sheep? She wonders in her head if the horns could be used for medicine.

Narrator-Mao thinks rams have horns. However, maybe, the shape isn’t the same as the medical horn she’d seen before because it’s a different one.

With a ghostly hand she reaches for the sheep on the other side of the fence.

Poor Lahan-nii then puts her in a chokehold as he says “Hey, you’re acting really weird.”

Narrator-Mao lets us know that she’s aware she’s acting strange, but she can’t help it. She’s in desperate need of some kind of medicine and stutters out “M-Medicine….”

Lahan-nii’s like “Medicine? Are you sick?” and Narrator-Mao remarks that “Lahan-nii, Maomao really just wants you to bring any kind of medicine”.

“Medicine? Come to think of it, there was something that Suiren-dono entrusted me with.” Basen pulls a cloth baggy from his pocket. Suiren had told him that if Maomao starts acting up, he should show her this - Basen explains. What he pulls out is a strange dried fish in the shape of “S”

“S-Seahorse!”

Narrator-Mao notes that it’s also called dragon’s spawn. It’s a strange underwater creature that can neither be called fish nor insect.. but Basen quickly hides it from her again.

Maomao's like “Hey!” but Basen pulls out a piece of paper that was also in the lil baggy, saying “Ehm, so..” as he does.

• If Maomao doesn't behave well, show her what's inside this bag. Don't give it to her right away - only do so when the job is done. •

While it was Basen who was reading the note, all Maomao could hear was Suirens voice. She thinks “As you'd expect from a skilled old lady.”

Narrator-Mao admits that Suiren is better at handling her than the lady from Verdigris,.. but it's probably because she saw how Jinshi went about baiting her so many times before. The fact that it was Suiren who gave this to Basen and not Jinshi shows that to her Basen is still a kid.

Lahan-nii(?) then asks if she's recovered from her fit and Maomao's like “Yes! I'm fine.”

But, of course, he isn't used to this.. so he goes “No, there's no way you're fine? There's no medicine that can cure you just from looking at it!”

He never forgets to attack. However, Maomao tells him not to worry and instead they should just get their job done quickly.. In her head she adds “For the seahorse”.

Narrator-Mao fills us in that in herbal medicine it’s generally used as a tonic.

But Lahan-nii keeps arguing, saying that he’s not convinced and repeats “Isn’t it strange? Isn’t it strange?” and Maomao remarks that “You’re kind of reminding me of someone who repeats things. Lahan-ani.”

The most glaring thing, Narrator-Mao notes are the glasses - it’s the most glaring thing.

Lahan-nii attempts complaining that he’s not Lahan-nii, but before he can actually go on Maomao interrupts him by asking if they should leave now, they don’t have much time. Meanwhile Narrator-Mao adds that while, as promised, the name introduction was interrupted, she feels like she’s getting kinda tired of it.

So, instead of more such shenanigans, we have her setting the next scene for us.

While the farmer said there would be a temple, it’s not like any Maomao has seen before. It’s made of brick, has no windows and inside cloth hangs freely. Instead of statues, there are wall hangings depicting gods and buddha.

Despite sounding unconvinced, Lahan-nii says “Well then, here I go..” as he knocks on the door of the house next to the shrine.

“........”

No response.

“Is he away?” - “Maybe he’s away? Taking care of the sheeps and field..”

Narrator-Mao says that it seems like a good idea to head back soon for lunch/that it would be a good time to come back for lunch.

“Do you need something?”

A low, hoarse voice could be heard.

As they turned around, they saw a dark-skinned old man standing there - a hoe in his hand and a towel around his neck indicating that he must be a farmer. His clothes are also stained with black dirt and have been patched many times. Narrator-Mao’s sure he’s a farmer-

“!?”

Basen had reached for the hilt of his sword, but stopped himself - even Maomao understood why he took a stance without realizing.

Lahan-nii’s like “Hey hey, what are you doing taking a stance against a farmer” and Narrator-Mao notes that the man's dark skin has a lot of pigment spots, proof of having spent much time exposed to the sun.. but that’s not why Basen reacted.

The old man’s left eye was missing, judging by how hollow the socket appeared. His right hand, which is holding the hoe, has no index finger and the remaining exposed parts of his body show numerous knife and arrow wounds.

Narrator-Mao then thinks back to the man earlier that told them that this farmer would likely end up confused or embarrassed.

It’s Basen who asks, respectfully, if the man has any military experience.. but the man says that it’s not that big of a deal, it’s just locusts that went rampage in the grasslands.

“Locusts…” Maomao thinks.

That’s an interesting thing to say. She also had something else on her mind as well.

“Were you working in the fields?” She blurts out. The man is holding a hoe and caked in mud - the state of his clothing looked familiar.

The old man replies “What else do you think I was doing?”, not really caring much.

Narrator-Mao notes that what she said was certainly too obvious, but she noticed something while looking at the village fields.

She says, aloud, that she thought that if you were working normally in the fields, you wouldn’t get so dirty.

Filling us in as narrator that even if he was taking care of the wheat this time of year, he shouldn’t have gotten this dirty. The soil in the fields is dry and won’t get sticky unless you make it wet.

Maomao ends up asking if a man named Rikuson has come here before.. the man lets out a “...Hmm.”

He then blinked his one eye and opened the door to his house, which could only be called a hut - “Come inside you guys. I’ll give you some goat’s milk.”

The old man propped up his hoe, inviting them inside.

— Notes & Chapter 9

There’s only a couple of things for this chapter.

1: The farmer Lahan-nii talks to before Maomao starts having her withdrawal symptoms isn’t named. He’s later on just called “the farmer from earlier”.

2: The next chapter is the conclusion of this corn mini arc, but there's more chapters tying into it.

3: At the point where Maomao says that Lahan-nii is reminding her of someone, she uses Lahan-ani, not Lahan-nii. It makes it more direct, Lahan aniki, Lahan’s older brother.

4: The older gentleman at the end, there’s a couple different options I got for his name. By chapter 11, I decided to go with the most common one I kept getting: Nenshin.

5: In Japanese the kanji used to explain the shape of the sea horse is: 乙

I hope you enjoyed this one - if you'd like to get notified or tagged when new chapters drop, let me know.

[punsify1]

200+ Hilarious Rizz Jokes That Will Have You Smooth Talking and Laughing

If you’ve got rizz, you already know the power of a good pickup line. But what if we combined that smooth-talking charm with a little comedy? That’s where rizz jokes come in!

Whether you’re trying to impress someone, make them laugh, or just upgrade your flirting game, these 200+ rizz jokes will have you spitting game with a side of giggles.

So, let’s get to it—prepare to laugh, cringe, and maybe even steal a few lines for your next DM!

😏 1. Classic Rizz Jokes

You can’t go wrong with these timeless smooth-talking jokes.

Are you a magician? Because every time I look at you, everyone else disappears.

Do you have WiFi? Because I’m really feeling a connection.

Is your name Google? Because you’ve got everything I’ve been searching for.

Are you a parking ticket? Because you’ve got “FINE” written all over you.

Are you made of copper and tellurium? Because you’re Cu-Te.

😂 2. Punny Rizz Jokes

Because wordplay is attractive too!

Are you a bank loan? Because you have my interest.

Is your name Chapstick? Because you’re making my lips feel lonely.

Are you French? Because Eiffel for you.

Are you a keyboard? Because you’re just my type.

Do you work at Starbucks? Because I like you a latte.

🤭 3. Flirty But Funny Rizz Jokes

Perfect for breaking the ice with a side of charm.

Do you like raisins? No? How about a date?

Are you a camera? Because every time I look at you, I smile.

Can you lend me a kiss? I promise I’ll give it back.

Are you Australian? Because when I look at you, I feel down under.

Is your name Algebra? Because you’ve got me solving for X.

🥶 4. Ice-Cold Rizz Jokes (For When You Gotta Recover)

Because sometimes you flop—but at least be funny about it!

Are you an electrician? Because I just felt a spark… but I think you blew the fuse.

If you were a fruit, you’d be a fine-apple… but I think I’m allergic to rejection.

I was going to flirt, but my rizz crashed like Windows XP.

Do you like bad boys? Because my GPA is under 2.0.

Are you the sun? Because looking at you too long is bad for me.

🧐 5. Smart Rizz Jokes (For The Brainy Flirts)

If they love intelligence, these are for you.

Are you Schrödinger’s cat? Because I’m uncertain if you like me or not.

Are you a black hole? Because I’m falling for you at the speed of light.

Are you a periodic table? Because you and I have chemistry.

You must be a dictionary… because you give my life meaning.

Are you gravity? Because you’ve got me falling hard.

🔥 6. Risky Rizz Jokes (For The Bold Ones 😏)

Use these at your own risk!

Are you a snowstorm? Because you just made my heart freeze.

Do you believe in love at first sight, or should I walk by again?

Is your name Netflix? Because I could binge you all night.

Do you have a name, or can I call you mine?

Are we at a restaurant? Because you’re serving looks.

🥰 7. Sweet Rizz Jokes (For The Romantic Type)

Flirting with a touch of sugar.

Do you have a Band-Aid? Because I just scraped my knee falling for you.

If beauty were time, you’d be an eternity.

Are you a dream? Because I never want to wake up.

Is your heart a bakery? Because you just made me crumble.

I must be a snowflake because I’ve fallen for you.

🤡 8. Self-Deprecating Rizz Jokes

For when humility is the ultimate game.

Are you a magician? Because I just disappeared from your DMs.

My love for you is like my bank account… completely empty.

Are you my phone? Because I stare at you all day and still don’t know what’s going on.

Are you my alarm clock? Because I keep hitting snooze on my chances.

I’d say you’re out of my league… but I don’t think I was even drafted.

🏆 9. Top-Tier Rizz Jokes

For when you really want to impress.

Are you a painting? Because I could stare at you all day.

Do you believe in love at first sight, or should I send another selfie?

If we were both socks, we’d make a great pair.

I think you might be an equation… because you’ve got all the right solutions.

Are you a sunset? Because I can’t take my eyes off you.

🤔 FAQs

1. What is rizz?

“Rizz” is short for charisma—basically, it’s your ability to charm or flirt smoothly.

2. Why are dad jokes mixed with rizz jokes?

Because humor makes flirting more fun! A good joke can break the ice and keep the conversation going.

3. What’s the difference between “W Rizz” and “L Rizz”?

W Rizz (Win Rizz) = Smooth and successful flirting.

L Rizz (Loss Rizz) = Awkward or cringe-worthy flirting attempts.

4. Can I really use these jokes in real life?

Absolutely! Just read the room, deliver them confidently, and know when to switch it up if they don’t land.

😂 Conclusion

And there you have it—200+ rizz jokes that will keep your flirting game fresh and funny! Whether you’re dropping smooth lines or making someone laugh with a goofy pun, the key to good rizz is confidence.

So go out there, try these jokes, and remember: if all else fails… just be yourself (with a little humor on the side). 😏