#Daughter of the Lilies Brent | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

emf005 · 1 year

Text

Homecoming

Marauders Era/ non-magical

Marauders x Reader, Army brother x reader

Warnings: Mentions of death, anxiety, let me know if I missed anything else!

Summery: Y/N loves her friends and her brothers with all her heart. But, when one of her brother, who is in the army, doesn't send her a letter home, its hard to enjoy her birthday.

You passed the common room, chewing on your already non-existent nails. The mail would be coming any second now. Any second Malcome, the mail deliverer for Gryffindor house, would be walking through that door to hand you two letters. One from Nigle at home and the other from Brent who was overseas fighting for your country.

Sirius and Remus watched you with uneasy faces. They knew how you got on mail day. You weren’t an openly expressive person, but once a week they saw your nerves just explode out of you. And if you didn’t get a letter that week… no one would see you for two days. No one knew where you went. You didn’t eat, they doubted you slept. But on the third day, you would walk into the great hall for food looking like you had gone to war yourself.

James walked down the stairs just as you ripped off your index finger’s nail. He winced for you when you just moved on to your ring finger without hesitation. He sat down besides Sirius and Remus and watched your pace.

“How long has she been…”

“Four hours.” Remus answered, no one taking their eyes off you.

“At least. She was already like this when we got here.” Sirius added. James frowned.

They all knew how important family was to you. And all you had left of the blood family was your two brothers. They practically raised you. Your mother had died in a car crash when you were five and your father in a war when you were seven.

You had been friends with James since you two were in diapers and when you all went to Hogwrats, the boarding school for the Elite, you met Remus, Sirius, Lily, and Peter. They all knew of your situation. You were raised like a military daughter by your father. He hadn;t meant to be so harsh when he was home and it never bothered you. But because of the way you were brought up, you never showed emotion or weakness, if you could help it. You were scarily physically fit and you had a tactical brian. (You were the only one both Sirius and Remus lost at chess to). When he died it was really hard. You had James and your brothers, but after the funeral, Brent had to leave again and Nigel was barely ever around because he worked so much. But you all made do with what you could.

The door opened and you stopped halfway on your partially ripped off nail as Lily Evans walked in. You tore the rest of the nail off and continued to pace. She frowned and sat down by the boys.

“She looks worse than normal.”

“She didn’t get a letter last week from Brent, remember?” She nodded.

“Right. I forgot. Should we-”

“No,” all three boys replied in unison. While Lily was your closest female friend, you were much closer to the four boys. Even Peter who was serving out a detention with Professor Flitwick, the geography teacher. She sighed and sat back into the couch and watched you with the rest of the boys. You had finished tearing apart your right hand and had started on your left when the door opened again. You paused and looked up. Black hair? Check. Brown eyes? Check. Tall and gangly? Check. Messenger bag? Check.

Malcolm had arrived with the mail.

Everyone dashed over to the man and he handed everything out, you waited in the back. Silently and what could have been mistaken as patients. The boys and Lily got they’re mail and walked back to the couch to wait for you. You always got your mail alone. You always insisted. You always made sure you got your mail alone.

You walked up to the messenger boy and he smiled.

“How are you doing, Y/N?”

“Alright, and you?” You looked in his back and back at him. He smiled gently and handed you a letter and a box.

“I’ve been fine. Happy early birthday, Y/N.” He handed you the objects and left. You watched him go and stared at the door even after it closed. You swallowed and went back to your friends.

“What did you get?” Lily asked with fake chipperness, earning glares from the boys. She tried too hard sometimes. She had the best intentions, but she didn’t understand that you had to be the first to speak. She couldn;t go out in search of a conversation. It was just how you functioned.

You didn;t answer and set the letter and box down. You looked at the neatly wrapped box. It was from Nigel, as expected. Moment of truth. You held your breath, and so did the boys, as you flipped the card over.

Nigel Y/L/N

You tensed at the name written. It wasn't from Brent. He never missed two weeks in a row. What had happened? Is he alright?

You swallowed and silently stood, picking up the box. You nodded to your friends and disappeared up the stairs, not being able to control your shaking much longer. You were scared. So so scared. You wouldn’t be able to sit through your brother’s funeral. If that's what happened. James had to take you away from your fathers, but what would happen if it was Brent lying in that coffin instead of your father this time?

Two weeks in a row. You couldn’t fathom it. You didn;t even care that it was your birthday week. You just didn’t care. You just wanted to know that he was alright.

You set the letter and the box down on your bed before grabbing your secret emergency bag and disappearing out the window and down the vines on the tower. You needed a minute. And by a minute you meant two days.

Two days passed and no one had seen you, as usual. On the third day, the boys were expecting you to walk in for breakfast, but you didn’t. The four of them exchanged glances. That had never happened before. It was always two days. No more, no less. Did they like it? No. Did they wish they could change it? Absolutely. But they could not. Three days in a row though? That had them even more worried.

The breakfast bell rang, singling it was time to go to their first class. Luckily they had they’re favorite class. Literature with Professor Mcgonagall.She was not only the head of their house, but she was the only person who sort of put up with their antics.

“Where do you think she is?” Remus asked James and Sirius. Peter and LIly were walking a bit ahead of the three. James and Sirius shook their heads.

“I don’t know. But it can’t be good. I snagged her some fruit and a muffin incase we see her, though,” Sirius said. He was the one always looking out for your physical health. Making sure you were eating enough and not studying too hard or working down at the coffee shop in town for too long. Remus and James made sure that you knew all of them were there for you. Peter was the annoying little brother who could get you to roll your eyes with amusement and Lily would often distract you with gossip that you had no interest in hearing.

“That's good. She always looks like she has lost twenty pounds when she comes back.” James and Sirius nodded in sad agreement.

The five of them entered the classroom to see you sitting at your usual spot with your normal ridgid back, though you looked more stiff than normal. Lily and Peter greeted you before taking their seats, though all they got was a silent head nod. James sat down on one side of you and Sirius took the other side. Remus sat in front of you besides Lily.

Sirius pulled out the food and sat it down beside you, wishing he had thought to grab some bacon before it had disappeared.

“Here,” he slid it over to you, but all you did was eye it before pulling your attention back to the front. “Y/N, you gotta eat.”

“Not hungry,” you grumbled out. He bit his tongue before he came back with a snarky comment. He was normally able to, but when you were like this, even the teachers walked on eggshells around you. Your temper was notorious around the school and you would most likely disappear for another few days.

“It's not much, Y/N/N. I really think you should-”

“Not. Hungary.” He studied you for a second more. Your cheek bones were sharper and your eyes duller. He could see all the bones in your hand and your collar bone looked as if it were about to break skin. Not to mention you were paler than a ghost.

“Then eat it for me?” You glanced at him and clenched your jaw. You two had a mini argument with your eyes, but you were too tired to continue fighting with him so you took the napkin and started nibbling on some of the grapes.

You hated to admit it, but you were hungry.

Mcgonagall saw you eating but let you. She was normally strict about that sort of thing, but you were always the exception. Especially if it had been a rough weekend. You went through the motions of the day. You always had a class with either Remus, Sirius, James or all three. Sometimes your classes had one of those three plus Peter and Lily. Mcgonagall was the only one you six had all together, though.

After classes you went to the great hall, ate one thing and left without a word. No one was too happy with your actions, but they didn’t want to push you further away by arguing with you about it. Hopefully you would be better in the morning.

You weren’t.

You showed up for breakfast, which was good. You ate an apple and a piece of bacon, but that was it. You couldn’t stomach anything other than that. Sirius tried to get you to eat something else. A bit more, a chocolate chip muffin or one of those mini cakes, but you begged him with your eyes to stop. He nodded and stopped attempting to get you to eat more.

The two of you normally knew what the other was thinking, which always freaked James and Remus out a bit. All it took was for you two to glance at each other sometimes and there would be some inside joke shared. You two were actually the reason charades were banned on game night. Not like you two didn't normally win anyhow when you were paired up.

Yet again, that day you went through the motions. They all watched you do it. The next day was your birthday. Your sixteenth. They had all planned a surprise party, just you six, but you wouldn’t want to participate. They knew that. How they wished your brother had had a chance to send a letter back. It was actually painful to see you like this…

The next day you woke up and immediately wanted to go back to sleep. But Lily made you get up and get dressed. The boys were waiting for you down stairs with soft smiles on their faces, which you appreciated. Normally they would be all over you and you would all laugh like maniacs. But you weren’t in the mood for laughing.

“Happy birthday, Y/N/N,” James said and kissed your hairline. A thing he had done since you were kids. You two were exactly like siblings. He was a Y/L/N and you were a Potter. A bit weird when you thought about it, but also not weird at all.

“Thanks, Jamie.” You said with a smile.Remus and Peter wished you a happy birthday and hug as well.

“Happy birthday,” Sirius said finally as you all headed out of the common room. He patted you awkwardly on the back which made you chuckle. You rested your head on his shoulder as you two walked, honestly about to fall back asleep.

“Thanks, Sirius.” You said sadly.

“He’s alright, Y/N. You know that.” You stayed silent. You really wish you did.

You ate a bit more at breakfast that day, thanks to Sirius insisting that you have a small breakfast cake. You could use the sugar anyhow. But, despite your friends' best efforts, you felt the worst today. You just wanted to curl up in your blanket and sleep for an entire eternity. Until the war was over and your brother could come home. Until summer when you would be able to see them both. You just wanted your family back. That was the one thing you wished for that you knew could never happen.

“Now, who can tell me what we learned from Hamlet?” Mcgongall asked from the front of the class. You weren’t paying attention. Normally, you and Lily would be rivaling each other, playfully, to answer the question, but you just didn’t have the energy or the care to answer today.

The door squeaked open from behind the class and everyone turned in their seats to see who it was. Everyone but you. You were rolling your quill up and down the parchment with nothing but dull boredom. After a few minutes Sirius nudged your side.

“Hm?” He nudged you again. “What?” You looked up at him, irritated, but then you caught something else. You looked past him and your whole body stopped.

There at the back of the class was Brent. He was in his uniform pants and a plain white t-shirt and had a box in his hand. He had that stupid half, crooked grin on his face as he stared you down.

Tears were in your eyes as you jumped up and ran to him. You leapt onto him and wrapped your legs around his waist like you did when you were a little girl.

He hugged you tightly as you buried your head into the crook of his neck. You sobbed into his shirt and squeezed him tightly.

The majority of your classmates were surprised by your reaction. They never saw you really show much emotion other than laughter. To see you actually leap onto someone like this and start to sobbing was something completely strange and forgin to them.

But you didn’t care. For once in your life you didn’t care that they saw a weaker side of you.

“I hate you so much. You're such a jerk.” You mumbled into his shoulder. He hugged you tighter and chuckled.

“I know. I’m sorry. I’m so so so sorry.” You sobbed again. And he looked at his old teacher, silently asking permission to leave with you. She rolled her eyes and made a shooing motion with her hands. He smiled gratefully and took you out of the room.

He took you down to the “Black Lake”, still carrying you like a child. You two got a few weird looks but neither of you really cared.

He set you down and you two sat across from each other. He wiped your face off.

“Hey, no more crying for me. Ok? I’m alright. See?” He held his arms out, making you chuckle with a hiccup.

“Yeah. Ok.” He frowned and set a hand on your knee.

“Hey. You gotta take care of yourself too. You look terrible. You actually get fed good food up here, and what do I get? Nasty surprise meat. I’d take advantage of that if I were you.” You nodded and hugged your knees.

“How’ve you been, though? Your letters aren’t always very detailed.”

“I’m alright. I met a pretty girl over in America when I was stationed over there last month.”

“And you didn’t tell me?” You gasped, faking offense.

“I told Nigel.”

“Rude.” He laughed and shoved your knee. You smiled and tucked a strand of hair behind your ear.

“So why are you here? They wouldn’t let you out just for my birthday.”

“Actually I got stationed at the base close to home. I got the day pass.”

“So you have all day?” You asked excitedly.

“I do, you have class.”

“It wouldn’t be the first time I skipped. ALthough, the boys might be upset that I didn;t ask them to tag along.” He smirked, mischief glinting in his eye.

“Well perhaps, since it is your birthday and all, we can have a break from school? You and the boys? What do you say?” You beamed. “I’ve been wanting to meet who you have been talking about. I mean, I know James, but the other three?”

“You’ll love them!” You started to ramble on and on about them and he just smiled. He never saw you this animated about much before. Even as a little girl you would hide your emotions a bit more than any other kid your age would. Especially after losing your mother. You were too little to really understand what was happening. You did understand, though, that a person you trusted and cared for was never coming back. That had broken you a bit. It only got worse with age. And then when money became an issue when your father died and Nigel started to work non-stop and then Brent joined the army, it was just so much for someone so young.

The bell rang and you smiled.

“Meet us at the football in ten minutes.” You ran off quickly. He rolled his eyes and shoved the present he had gotten you in the pocket of his uniform. He remembered a bit of stuff in your letters about the group of friends you had found. He hadn;t seen you since you had joined the school-what is that now?- four years ago, maybe? He nearly didn’t recognize you when he walked into the room.

You had gotten taller, definitely, your hair was a bit (Darker/Lighter) and you looked almost exactly like dad, but more feminie. He couldn;t have helped but get a bit sad at the sight of you, though. He had missed so much of your life. So many Christmases, Birthdays, Halloweens. He missed them all. But at least you were able to get your school supplies and your uniform. Eat a proper meal, when you would let yourself

He walked down to the football stadium on campus but stopped by a payphone to give Nigel a ring. He hadn;t seen him yet, and although he would disapprove of you and your friends skipping the rest of your classes, he was almost positive that he would come meet you and spend your birthday with them.

You caught them as they were walking out of the classroom. They smiled at your smile and jogged over to you. Sirius slung an arm around your shoulder.

“See. I told you he was alright.”

“And thank god you were right. Anyhow! He wants to spend the day with me and since he hasn;t met any of you yet, would you all like to come along?” “Ditch classes?” Lily asked disapprovingly. You gave her puppy dog eyes. She sighed in defeat. “I will not tag along, but I will not stop you nor will I rat you out.” YOU smiled, knowing that was the best you would get from her. You turned to the other boys.

“Count me in! I haven’t seen Brent in ages.” James said happily.

“I’m in too!” Sirius laughed. “Getting out of class is getting out of class!” he laughed. The three stared at Remus and Peter.

“I just got out of detention,” Peter squeaked. “I don;t want to go back to helping Mrs.Norris de-ratify the dungeons!” You gave a pout, but understood. Then you turned all your attention on Remus. He opened his mouth about to decline the offer, but you mouthed a silent “please” to him and he gave up.

“I suppose one day of skipped classes.” You grinned, wide.

“YES!” You yelled and pulled the three after you. “You two are going to love Brent! He's been dying to meet you!” They all laughed, glad to see you back to your usual self.

You took them down to the Football field where you saw two boys talking leisurely. You smiled and ran faster.

“Nigel!?” The second boy looked up and smiled.

“Speak of the devil.”

“What are you doing here?”

“Sargent Slacker was telling me about your plan to skip school and drag your poor friends plus James-”

“Hey!”

“-along for the ride.”

“They willingly came, there was no dragging. Oh! Neither of you have met Remus or Sirius yet!” You shoved them in front of you, Sirius laughing and Remus stumbling a bit. “Sirius, Remus, these are my older brothers, Nigel and Brett.” You gestured to the two. “Nigle Brett, this is Sirius Black and Remus Lupin.”

“I’m James!”

“We know!” All five of you called in unison.

“Nice to meet you, Remus, Sirius,” your brothers said and shook their hands. Nigel ruffled James’ hair as you all started to walk down towards town. It wasn’t far from school and was a nice quaint area with lots of places to hang out. None of the people that roamed or shopped there would rat you out to the teachers for ditching. Some had already tried to tattle on the kids early on in the school’s years but stopped after a few years realizing that it wasn’t going to do anything. And, honestly, it didn’t happen so much anymore.

You were talking with Brent and Sirius upfront while Remus and James were in the back with Nigel.

“So, what's been happening at school? How’s Mcgonagall?”

“Still teaching the same courses as when you were here.” You answered with a smirk feeling much more like yourself. Four years. It had been four years since you last saw your brother and now he was home for a little while. You laughed the whole way down to the coffee shop. Brent and Nigel slowly getting to know Remus and Sirius.

When you finally got to the coffee shop you and Sirius went to find a seat while everyone else went to get the order in. You got the same thing everytime and Sirius had given Remus his order quickly and a few coins to get it.

“So, having a good birthday I take it?” Sirius asked. You laughed and nodded, looking over at your brother who was messing up James’ hair.

“It may sound selfish, but yeah. I really am.”

“Why would that sound selfish?” You looked at your friend with a small smile.

“Well, to me, at least, it sounds like I don’t appreciate you guys. You have to deal with all my shit all the time and it's so not fair. I’m sorry, really I-”

“Hey. No. Don't be sorry. If we minded putting up with your shit every now and then we wouldn’t stick around you at all. Don’t ever be sorry though, alright? I couldn’t imagine Reg going off to war and leaving me stuck here, wondering if he’s alright or not. I’d completely lose it. You can at least function.”

“Barely,” you scoffed. Sirius chuckled.

“Barely is still functioning.” You looked down at your lap, still slightly ashamed for the way you had been acting. Sirius grabbed your hand and squeezed it. You looked up at him. He smiled and you smiled back. He opened his mouth to say something when Brent came back with a tray of drink and food. He slid in besides you, handing you your (Favorite over the top sugary drink) and eyeing Sirius, though you didn’t notice. Nigel, James, and Remus appeared a a second later with the rest of the stuff and started to distribute the food.

Back in the line a few moments earlier:

Brent ruffled James’ hair playfully and James laughed.

“So how’s she been doing, really?” He asked James as they made their way closer to the counter. “She tells me my letters are vague but that girl knows how to skirt around a question.” James chuckled and nodded.

“She sure does. When your letter comes in on time she’s normally pretty alright. Of course, she always gets a little tense around that time but when they’re late,” James shook his head, not knowing how to say it, but Brent got the picture. He glanced over and saw you and Sirius holding hands and narrowed his eyes.

“Ok, and what's his deal?” James looked over and saw you and Sirius.

“What? Sirius? What do you mean?” James asked, trying to play it cool, but getting very worried. He was Sirius’ best friend. Of course he knew of a few extra details about his personal life. One of those extra details was a crush that he had been nursing for a good two years. James noticed it first, being like a third brother to you. He asked Sirius about it and he denied it. But then about a year ago, Brent’s letter had gotten lost in the mail and didn’t show up for about a month. You had gone into such a frenzied state that you couldn’t move. You had scared the crap out of Sirius and that was when he realized that his feelings had altered towards you. James always told Sirius to go for it, but you had lost so much that Sirius didn’t want to jeopardize anything.

“Yeah. Why’s he holding her hand? And why’s he been looking at her like that since he came to the field? Don’t tell me that-”

“Brent. We are in our fifth year now. You do remember what hormones are, right?”

“That is exactly what I’m afraid of. That they’re just hormones.”

“I really don’t think that's what it is.”

“So he does?”

“Well, yes, but-” Brent grabbed a tray before James could say anything else and marched over to the table. James watched, horrified. What had he just unleashed?

You were all laughing at stupid stories from childhoods and school. Everything was right. For you, at least. Brent couldn’t get it out of his mind that someone close to you had a crush on you and you were, seemingly, completely oblivious.

He had missed four years. Four whole years and now some teenage boy wanted to suck your face. That did not sit right with him. Especially because he saw himself in the boy that had been holding your hand a few moments ago. He was and remained to be a player. He knew one when he saw one. It was true, he had found a girl in America, a real nice one, too. And she made him want to settle a bit, not go sucking face with every girl in every country he went to. But it had taken him twenty four years to find that. You all were still young. And he saw how heavily you relied on your friends. Scarily enough, how much you relied on this one.

“Brent?” He snapped out of his thoughts and looked at you. “Are you ok? You zoned out for a minute.” He smiled and ruffled your hair roughly.

“I’m all good, kid. How’s sixteen feel?”

“Pretty good,” you laughed and shoved him off of you. “Though, havn’t gotten to try it out much.”

“Well, you’ll have a whole year to try it out.” You all left the coffee shop and started to roam the streets. You and the boys all wanted to go into the sweets shop and ran in, but Brent stopped Sirius and held him back. “I want to have a talk with you.” He had placed a firm hand on Sirius’ shoulder, not letting him move. Sirius swallowed but obeyed.

They started to walk through town in silence and Sirius kept looking over his shoulder at the sweets shop. He wasn’t the biggest fan of candies. More of a cake and pastry type, but the candies were your favorite so he always made sure to go in with you.

“So.” Brent said, stopping by the fountain. “How old are you, Sirius?”

“Seventeen, sir.” Sirius was never one to use “Sir” or “Ma’am”, unless it was in a mocking manner, this, though, was a situation that he knew he needed it in. He might be reckless, but he was also a gentleman and knew when to use what.

“And you know my sister is sixteen.”

“As of today. We had this party planned for her later, if you’d like to come. And Nigel. I bet she’d like that.”

“I bet she would, family and friends mean everything to her.”

“Yeah, they do.”

“And if something happens to the people she cares about, she doesn’t take it lightly.”

“Completely right,” Sirius said uneasily, not knowing how exactly to reply.

“So what are your intentions with my sister, exactly?”

“I just want to be there for her. She’s done the exact same thing for me.”

“So you're just repaying her? Toss her out when your debt is paid in full?”

“What?” Sirius asked, alarmed. “No! No! Not at all!”

“Then what? What more do you want from her? She may not seem it but she’s openly trusting. Naive at times even. People could take advantage of that.”

“Yes, they could. I hope you don’t mean-”

“That you would? That's exactly what I mean. I may have been gone for four years, but I’m not blind. I see the way you look at her, she may not, but I do. And if you ever think about hurting her in anyway-”

“I promise, that's the last thing I ever want to do. She’s like family to me. I wouldn’t ever dream of hurting her one bit. I owe her so much and she’s just… the best.”

“Damn right she is. I’m warning you though. I know your type. And my little sister will not be hurt, understood?” He didn’t give Sirius a chance to reply before walking away, leaving him by the fountain not knowing what to do.

Sirius had felt a burning hole in his chest for two years. He hadn’t realized it at first but now that he knew about it he knew he wouldn;t be able to get rid of it. The threats your brother, although valid, had just thrown his way scared Sirius half to death. He was twice his size in height and muscle mass but more than that, he spoke the truth. The only thing that had kept Sirius from not saying anything to you before about how he felt was all those fears. He didn’t want to hurt you. He wanted to be there for you. And if that was only through friendship-

He sighed and kicked the ground, shoving his hands in his pockets and touching a box in his leather jacket he had gotten for you for your birthday. Lily and Remus and James had helped him pick it out for you. He was going to tell you how he felt tonight and give you your gift but all those fears were resurfacing now and he knew he wouldn’t be able to.

“Sirius!” You shouted. He looked up and saw you running at him with a large bag in your hands. “Sirius come on we were- hey, what's wrong?”

“Huh? Nothing. Why?”

“You don’t look good. Did you get enough sleep last night? Did you eat enough? Are you not feeling alright?” He chuckled and brushed off your concerns.

“I’m fine. I’m fine. Why are you worried about me? Its your day.”

“Well, yeah, but the only reason I like my birthday is because I get to hang around you guys. And now my brothers are here and its even more perfect! Are you sure you’re alright? We can go back up to the school if-”

“What? No! Come on, James and Remus will be looking for us.” You pursered your lips but nodded and broke out into a smile before dragging him down the street towards the candy shop’s entrance where everyone was waiting. You spent a bit more time around town before deciding to head back up to the school for dinner. Your brothers, unbeknownst to you, were coming back later for the party you didn;t know was happening and you wouldn’t let Brent go when he said that he ought to be on his way.

You James, Sirius, and Remus headed back up to the school alone. You and Remus up front examining all the goodies you had gotten from town and James and Sirius in the back.

“James, can I ask you something?” SIrius asked, watching you and Remus a good ten feet ahead of you.

“Of course! What's up?”

“Should I really tell Y/N tonight? I mean, it would take away from her birthday and her brother and-”

“Woah woah woah, what did Brent say to you?”

“What?”

“Brent, he was the one who put this in your head, right? Listen, I love the guy to death, but he’s overly protective of her.”

“That's funny coming from you.”

“Yeah, but I’ve watched you with her, Sirius. It's different. I know you won’t do anything stupid. You care too much about her. We all do.”

“Right but what if-well, what is going to happen if she doesn’t feel the same?”

“She will. Trust me.”

“Or what if something happens. She can’t lose another person, James. She can’t, this entire plan is just stupid. I’m not going to do anything tonight. I’m not going to tell her.”

“Until when?”

“Ever! I’m never going to tell her.”

“What! Sirius, you’ve got to be joking!”

“No, I’m not. The only way I can ensure she won't get hurt is if I stay close as friends. There's no danger there.”

“Yes there is! Come on, Sirius, mate, please just tell her tonight! You aren;t going to-”

“Come on slow polks!” You yelled over your shoulder, smiling and waving. “Your supposed to be the athletic ones.” Sirius laughed.

“ Wanna race then?”

“You’re on, Black!” You took off towards the school and Sirius ran after you before James could say anything else. Remus and James then walked slowly together after you two.

“What was that about?” Remus asked. James shook his head watching you two run.

“He’s not going to say anything.”

“WHAT!?”

“Brent got into his head and brought back all that shit we spent years getting out.”

“You have got to be joking!”

“I wish I was, Rem, I really wish I was.”

Your brothers were enough to keep you distracted while the boys set up the grounds for your party. Sirius remained set on the fact that he wasn’t going to tell you, despite what Remus and James tried to tell him. They spent the last four hours trying to convince him but nothing was getting through to him.

The sun had set and the lights were on as everyone waited for you to show up with your brothers. They had taken you out all day. Shopping and Milkshake hopping and just touring town.

You and your brothers appeared over the hill a little less than ten minutes after everything was all set up for the party. Your brothers were in the same clothes but they had forced you to change into clean jeans and a maroon top with embroidered flowers along the neckline. Your hair was down but the front pieces were pulled back and you wore a pair of converse sneakers, the cleanest pair you owned(which isn't saying much since there were mud splotches all over them).

SIrius smiled as you came speeding down the hill slightly ahead of your brothers. You beamed and tackled the four boys in a hug. Peter had shown up to help decorate along with Lily.

“I can’t believe you all did this!”

“How’d you know?” Sirius smirked and you rolled your eyes pointing up to the Happy Birthday Y/N sign above your head. The sign he had created himself. “Oh, and here I thought I gave it away.” you pushed him jokingly and laughed. He smiled, happy to see how thrilled your were.

Your brothers finally made it down the hill and the festivities began. Drinking and eating and laughing filled the air along with the bitter chill of night and early morning.

By the end of the night you were sitting on the edge of the dock a few yards away from the party, dipping your feet into the lake. Sirius came up behind you and sat down. You smiled and leaned your head up against his shoulder, closing your eyes and breathing in his leather Jacket. He kissed your hair and leaned his head against yours.

“Thank you,” you said after a minute. He looked at you and knitted his eyebrows.

“For what?” you smiled and looked back at the party.

“For this. For today. For everything.” You looked back up at him with huge eyes. “You really are amazing, Sirius.” He smiled and slid his jacket off, putting it around your shoulders.

“I’m only amazing to those who deserve it. And you deserve it and so much more.” You grinned and stared at him. “What?”

Your smile dimmed a minute as you looked back out at the lake.

“Nothing.”

“Hey, don’t do that. What’s wrong?” You sighed and leaned back onto your elbows.

“It's really nothing, Sirius. Just forget it.”

“No, this is your day. You tell me what you want and I’ll get it for you.” You rolled your eyes and chuckled.

“Knock it off. Your such a dork.”

“I’m serious,” you opened your mouth to make a smart comment but he kept talking. “You want the stars? I’ll get you the stars. You want the moon? Its yours. You want the biggest diamond in the world? Consider it done. JUst tell me and I’ll get it for you.”

You stared at him and took a large chug of your liquid courage. You licked the rest of the alcohol from your lips and looked at him straight past his eyes and into his soul, like you tended to do.

“You.”

“Wh-what?”

“You. I want you, Sirius.” He swallowed.

“You have me, Y/N/N.” You shook your head and slid up so you were on your knees.

“No. I don’t. I want all of you Sirius. I want to be yours and I want you to be mine. I can’t say that for once in my life I want to be selfish, because I always am. But, I’m ready to just take this time. I’m tired of waiting around. I. Want. You.”

“Wouldn’t you prefer the gift I got you?” You clenched your jaw and stared at him even more intensely.

“Take it back.” You growled. He swallowed.

His lack of response or interest broke you. You sighed and sat back on your heels, brushing the hair that had stuck to your face away. You shook your head and stood.

“Forget it.” You started to walk away from him, back to the party. He knew once you stepped off that dock you'd be out of his reach forever.

Unlike you, Sirius was never selfish, especially when it came to your well being. And just this once, he wanted to be. Just this once he needed to be.

“Y/N!” he called and ran to you, but you kept going. It pissed him off that you didn’t listen to him. He clenched his jaw and grabbed you by the waist, making you squeal as he carried you back to the end of the dock. He set you on your feet and held you in place.

“Sirius-”

“Listen. I love you, Y/N. I have loved you since the day I met you. But, I don’t want to hurt you. I refuse to be the reason you're hurt or the reason that you're crying. I can’t stand to see you sad and I want to be able to protect you from everything in this world, though I know you won’t let me. I’m terrified, but tonight, I don’t want to be. I just… Y/N, I-” you grabbed his face and brought him down to your lips as you rose to your toes. He eagerly kissed you back. Pulling you closer to him and deepening the kiss. You tasted like alcohol and wishes and light. Everything that you stood for and everything he loved about you. And, just like he thought, he was addicted.

When you two pulled away you both knew you were screwed. That there was no going back after that.

“Sirius,” you said hoarsely, but he just shook his head and pressed his lips to yours again.

“No.”

“You didn’t even know what I was going to say.”

“I don’t care.” he pressed his lips to yours again and you smiled into it as you wrapped your arms around his neck and he lifted you off the ground so you could wrap your legs around his waist. Happy birthday to you.

Brent looked down from the party, crushing the cup in his hand as he watched you make out with the black haired boy. He was grinding his teeth as he watched you kiss him back. James came up beside him with a grin on his face along with Nigel.

“Woah, Seems like little Y/N/N is all grown up.”

“You knew about this?” Brent asked angrily, turning to his brother abruptly.

“Of course, those two have been making eyes at each other since, what did you say James, 3rd year?” James nodded and took a sip of his drink. “Glad the guy finally had the guts to do it.” Brent turned back to the scene to see the two of you running up the hill, hand in hand laughing, you in his jacket. He clenched his teeth but Nigel just knocked his shoulder.

“What?”

“She’s a big girl, Brent. Trust her. She’s not that little girl you left behind when you went to the war four years ago.” He turned back to you two and sighed. He knew you weren’t, but he couldn’t help but see you that way. He loved you so much, and to suddenly be back with you all grown up…

“Brent! Nigel!” You beamed and ran up to them. “You guys are the best. Brent hugged you tight and ruffled your hair.

“Happy birthday kiddo.” You frowned up at him.

“You aren’t leaving are you?” He smiled sadly.

“Afraid so. I have to be headed back. But I’ll write, I promise, ok, kiddo?” You smiled sadly and nodded, hugging him tightly again.

“Be safe,” you mumbled into him. He smiled and kissed your head.

“For you, always.” He patted James on the back and looked at Sirius.

He held out his hand which Sirius took nervously. Brent took a breath and calmed himself down.

“It was good meeting you, Sirius.”

“You as well.” He looked over at you and back at Siirus.

“Take care of her.” He smiled and looked at you, who raised an eyebrow.

“Always,” you rolled your eyes at him and went to start talking to Nigel, as you three walked away.

“I'm proud of you,” James said, patting him on the back as Sirius finally breathed.

“Is he always that terrifying?” James laughed and pulled Sirius back into the party and despite him being terrified of Brent, all he could do was smile because he knew that as long as you and him were together, everything was just fine.

And from that day on everything was. Even the days when Brent didn’t write, he helped make them slightly easier. When he had a nightmare you were there for him. And life moved on perfectly and happily for the two of you.

Merry Christmas and a happy early New Year!

I hope you guys enjoyed this! I'm sorry I've been MIA for so long, life is absolutely disgustingly hectic.

As always please let me know what you think and anything you all want to read about!

Hopefully, with luck I'll be posting more in the New Year!

#reader x Sirius #harry potter fanfiction #reader x marauders #Reader x James #Y/N x sirius #Y/N x Remus #Y/N x James #Reader x remus

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