#Gosh I need a fic of sad and jealous Steve NOW

[plistommy]

Steve was waiting for Eddie so he could surprise him…

[midnightswithdearkatytspb]

VelvetCardiganBucky’s Recommendations 2021: Week 8 | February 14th –February 20th

Welcome to week 8 of my recommendations, if you would like to be featured on a future list, I follow the hashtag #ktkvcbreadinglist, message me, tag me in your future works, or reblog this post and link to your story, one-shot, Masterlist, writing challenge, etc.

Be aware some if not most stories and writers on this list are meant to be consumed by an audience of those 18+. My blog is also an 18+ blog.

« Last Week

Week 9 »

My Masterlist

My Fic Rec List of Mafia/Mob Bucky/Sebastian & Steve/Chris/Andy

Stuff I Posted This Week:

Dr. Darcy Lewis Playlist — Dr. Lewis – Astrophysics, Hacker, Music and Dog Lover, Nerd, and Hero

Bucky Barnes

(Mini) Series:

Man of the House 🐈 Pt. 3 by @literate-lamb » Sam Wilson x Fem!Reader & Dark!Bucky Barnes x Fem!Reader — A racket in the attic leads to a discovery of old memories. Your dissatisfaction leads you to a forgettable night. | First of all, my bad on not seeing that this had been updated, I’m so bummed I didn’t see this sooner. Second of all, this sent chills all over my body. The smut in this was so good and so it was just the right amount of thrilling/scary. I can’t wait to see what happens next!

Run To You Ch.3 🪙 Ch. 4 🪙 Ch. 5 🪙 Ch. 6 by @bestofbucky » Mob!Bucky Barnes x Reader — Mob boss Bucky Barnes hires you to be his bodyguard. | Everytime I see this story updated I get excited, and I also love how the reader is not a damsel. (Feb 18. Ch. 6) Oh my gosh that was intense but so good, thank you for making me laugh at the end. I felt like it was just what we needed! I can’t wait to see how things go!

Watch Out For The Quiet Ones by @eurynome827 » College AU Jock!Bucky x Reader — Bucky doesn’t keep it a secret that he slept with you, but he tells everyone you had a great night, that’s a lie, you faked it. Upset you tell the truth, he’s dead set on making things right with you. | This was straight to the point hot. It was almost like you could have read it in a coming of age book or seen it in a movie, with our the detailed smut scene having been in it. I would read it just for the smut alone but read it for the plot in a whole.

Watch Out For The Quiet Ones: 2 by @eurynome827 » Collece AU Sub/Jock!Bucky Barnes x Reader — A continuation from part one, but this time Bucky is back to make up for neglecting what could be the jealous reader and she has a creative way for him to do that. | I’m not usually into reading stories where Bucky is a Sub unless it’s Stucky x Reader, but this was just so good.

One-Shots:

Birthday Briefing by @drabblewithfrannybarnes » Bucky Barnes x Reader » You want your birthday gifts and you want it now. It just happens to benefit Bucky. | Carly did so good and I really loved it.

Gods and Monsters by @sweeterthanthis » Winter Soldier!Bucky Barnes x Reader — After being kidnapped you wake strapped to a table, next thing you know you’re just an offering for the “masterpiece,” to be bred. | This one shot made me sad but in a good way if that makes sense. You want to comfort Bucky so badly while beating up every Hydra agent while at it. Thank you Lau for the beautiful piece!

The Setup by @justagirlinafandomworld » FireFighter!Bucky Barnes x Reader — Still heartbroken from your last relationship, romance and relationships are far off from your radar. But your friend has taken it upon herself to set you up on a surprise blind date. God only knows where it can go from there. | I had Sebastian from The Little Mermaid singing Kiss The Girl in my head by the end of reading this. I absolutely adored this fluffy piece of writing and would definitely recommend it to anyone who is just in need of something sweet.

Alpinee Has Logged Off by @iraot » Bucky Barnes x Reader — Bucky had been neglecting his girlfriend lately and playing video games with his pals, he needs to make it up to her. | Pure smut, really good smut.

Lost Without You by @angrythingstarlight » Mafia!Bucky Barnes x Reader — Bucky Barnes would be lost with you. You’re his everything and he plans on spending Valentine’s Day proving it to you. | It’s so fluffy, that I’m not crying, you are!

All Dressed In White by @angrythingstarlight » Dark!Mafia Bucky Barnes x Reader — You were going to marry someone else, Bucky won’t let that happen. You belong to him now and forever. Till Death Do You Part. | This is so beautifully written, I almost felt as if I was actually watching it on my TV not reading it. It’s Dark and the smut is oh so juicy.

Lee Bodecker

Drabbles:

New Contract by @fuel-joy » Dark!Lee Bodecker x Reader — Reader just wants to get signed to a new agency but Producer Lee Bodecker just doesn’t want to make it easy for you. | This was short and really good! The end was also a surprise.

Chris Evans

Headcanons:

Dodger’s Day Out by @nony-bear » Chris Evans x Reader ft. Dodger Evans — You and Chris take Dodger to the dog park on a cold winter day. | It’s so fluffy and it has Dodger in it! What more could you ask for?

Steve Rogers

(Mini) Series:

The Riverter by @pagesoflauren » Steve Rogers x Reader — After escaping Hydra, you assist Dr. Erskine in helping Steve Rogers become Captain America. When Erskine is assassinated, you think your WWII career is over. Unfortunately, the SSR and Hydra are not done with you yet. | I really should have gone to bed, but instead I decided to binge read the four chapters and I can’t wait to find out just what Hydra is really up to. Lauren you really are an amazing writer!

One-Shots:

No Scrubs by @the-iceni-bitch » Steve Rogers x Fem!Reader — You try to keep Steve from dying of boredom at an Avengers charity gala. | Reader is badass? Check. Funny Thor? Check. Really good smut that you wish didn’t end? Check and check.

Andy Barber

One-Shots:

Just for Mrs Barber by @donutloverxo » Andy Barber x Reader — Your husband buys you kinky gifts (and a whole ass house) for your anniversary/valentines. | Fluffy and smutty just the way I like it. Thank you for the Valentine’s Day treat Berry! 💗

Stucky

(Mini) Series:

Caged, Bruised and Broken Ch. 3 by @river-soul » Dark!Stucky x Reader — A lonely scientist who is currently working on trying to find a breakthrough with Erskine’s serum catches the eye of Steve and Bucky, who are looking for the perfect wife. They’ll make her love them, whether she wants to or not. [Noncon, breeding, violence, psychological distress and explicit sex. 18+ only.] | This chapter had me in tears for some reason, even while the smut was so damn good. I can’t tell you how many emotions I go through while reading this series and it’s only 3 chapters in. READ IT!

One-Shots:

Sweet as Honey and Wine by @angrythingstarlight » Dark!Steve Rogers x Reader x Dark!Bucky Barnes — You’re the sweetest valentine anyone could ever ask for. Steve can’t wait to gift you to Bucky. His best pal deserves a treat. | Let me just say, what you think is going to happen doesn’t happen. I don’t want to confuse you too much but this is just too good not to read. The smut was also short and sweet!

Divided We Fall by @navybrat817 » Dark!Steve Rogers x Reader x Dark!Bucky Barnes — You sided with Steve Rogers during The Accords and sympathized with Bucky Barnes. When you found out they left Tony for dead in Siberia, you realize you didn’t know the super soldiers as well as you thought. And you had no idea that they planned to keep you by their side…forever. | All I’m just going to say is that very ending you don’t see coming and the smut in this is very good.

Little Minx by @saiyanprincessswanie » Dark!Steve Rogers x Reader x Darkish!Bucky Barnes — Dark!Steve drugs the reader with sex pollen and has his way with her multiple times. Bucky finds out what Steve is doing and tries to convince him that it is wrong. But, once Steve shows Bucky how good the reader is during drugged sex he can’t help but have his way with her too. | I would have to say very hot, and definitely a good way to end the day.

Thick As Thieves by @angrythingstarlight » Mafia!Bucky Barnes x Reader x Mafia!Steve Rogers — The only thing the Mafia hates as much as snitches are thieves. And you’re planning on stealing from Bucky and Steve, what happens if you get caught? | I did not see that coming, also the smut was just so good. *chefs kiss* (I can’t link this so..)

Misc.

One-Shots:

Loyalty by @navybrat817 » Dark!Andy Barber x Reader x Darkish!Bucky Barnes — Loyalty is something you’ve learned to both loathe and appreciate. | I really appreciate it when I’m reading something and it gives me chills and this did it. The smut is good but the connection between reader and Bucky makes this so good. I’m hoping for maybe a second part, if there isn’t, that’s okay.

[five-wow]

here are some thoughts from my (first, somewhat late) watch of 10.15!

we start off with adam intimidating a minion and threatening his life while they’re reburying three bodies. cool. this is totally something he can come back from.

joanna! danny’s mystery woman has a name! i very vaguely caught some annoyance/confusion about her name here on tumblr because apparently somewhere else (outside of the episodes, i assume?) she’d been called something else, if i understood correctly? but seeing as i missed most of that, i’m honestly just glad she has a name now.

also! joanna texting her sister/friend (i don’t really know who she is for sure?) that she met a guy at a bar - thank god, tbh, because last episode it looked like she just randomly had sex with a stranger (which is fine) and then got into his car to let him drive her home (which is not fine, because we may know danny is an okay guy, but she had no earthly way of knowing that).

“it wasn’t your fault. you did everything you could. it means a lot to me that you’re here.” kudos to sister/friend for not falling into the trap of blaming danny and piling onto his guilt subplot!

STEVE is WAITING OUTSIDE when danny leaves the morgue, oh god. that makes total sense and i’m glad for it, but i somehow didn’t expect them to show that.

steve: “you wanna talk about it?” nothing super clever to say here, but it just make me really, really happy every single time steve asks danny if he wants to talk about something (or just pushes him into it, ocassionally) because!! that’s good!! that’s healthy!! that’s a really good friendship, and i’m proud of steve. (on a slightly related note, i’ve been watching a lot of 9-1-1 and reading some fic and while a lot of that fic is really fun, i kind of feel like many of the writers in that fandom give eddie at least double the capability to deal with emotional turmoil in himself or others that he is shown to have in canon. eddie diaz is basically what danny sometimes accuses steve of being, only eddie is actually closed off and struggling with repressing everything he ever feels that much, and steve has by this point had years to learn healthier ways of coping and he is not that person anymore, at all. he knows how to talk about emotions and he does it, too, and the funny thing is that i’m pretty sure he learned a lot of that by making danny talk to him about danny’s emotions, which steve did all the time right from the very start because he cares about danny and wants him to be mentally happy and healthy, and tl;dr, steve and danny’s friendship makes them both happier, more emotionally stable people and that makes me emotional.)

tani teaching a class at the police academy and bonnie (grover’s niece) absolutely acing all her classes and tani and bonnie hanging out and getting lunch together and tani subtly mentoring bonnie IS ALL VERY GOOD.

fdjfkdjkfd oh god. i was so happy with this scene and then suddenly bonnie has a boyfriend and it’s the dude who buried bodies with adam a moment ago. so... is he a bad guy (i hope not, because i’m already a little tired at the idea of another cool female character getting in trouble all the time because she’s dating yakuza and that’s for some reason the most interesting thing the writers could think to do with her), or is he undercover? is adam undercover? are they BOTH undercover but they don’t know it about the other guy so they just keep committing crimes to look like badass criminals when really they’re just both trying to catch the other in a seriously bad crime?

oh god, there’s this whole scene with the academy recruits on the shooting range and tani keeps drilling them on shooting faster (which i have... thoughts about, too, but let’s not get into that) and they make it really explicit that bonnie is the fastest and definitely faster than her boyfriend and this, uh, really looks like foreshadowing for bonnie ending up having to draw her weapon on the boyfriend at some point.

adam to lou: “thanks for the coffee date.” i must say, very unexpected ship they’re pushing now. :p

adam: [starts saying things, possibly making up excuses] lou: “no, no, come on, you don’t have to explain anything to me.” let the man talk, lou!!! if you don’t want to hear it, i do.

ahhhh, lou is keeping adam occupied while steve searches adam’s apartment. things are making more sense now. (though lou does call steve to tell him to wrap things up like a minute after his coffee date with adam started, and also at most a dozen feet away from adam where chances are definitely above zero of adam being able to hear him, fjdkdf.)

steve had “a feeling” about adam. no need to be so jealous, danny.

wait, wait, adam is back on five-0? i... they probably showed or mentioned that in a recent episode, i think, but apparently i’ve really just been turning my brain off during this subplot because i do not remember that at all. (this is why i like bingewatching things, because at least then i have a clearer picture of what happened in the episodes right before, gosh.)

danny: “... but the point is that if i was a human being...” love it. love the subtle implication that danny is not a human being, but in fact an alien from new jersey, which as we all know is in outer space.

bonnie’s boyfriend is not officially bonnie’s boyfriend yet and she thinks he might be seeing someone on the side, and this is sad because as viewers we all know that that someone IS ADAM (and three dead guys). just not like that, though. probably.

bonnie: [tells tani her potential bf has two phones] tani: “hm, okay. this one’s easy: run.” YES. PLEASE DO.

quinn!!! i was starting to wonder if this was one of those mysteriously quinn-less episodes.

oh nooo, bonnie sneaks around potential bf’s house and then STEPS ON A TWIG. c’mon, girl.

fdjkfd the guys catch her and now i remember that this episode description said she was going to get kidnapped and adam would help get her back. this will be... interesting.

quinn’s awkward face while lou is yelling in surprise about bonnie having a boyfriend is absolute gold.

lou yells at tani for not telling him anything about the boyfriend yesterday but honestly, she does not deserve that.

also: all those dramatic shots on adam’s face, oh dear. is the rest of the team seeing that expression he has? are they seeing all these close-ups?

adam threatens his yakuza rival in an effort to help get bonnie back. is this supposed to be redemption for adam? i’m confused.

lou says it’s not tani’s fault and he apologizes! this is an episode of people realizing they shouldn’t put the blame on innocent bystanders (instead of one that attempts to heighten the drama by milking misplaced anger for all that it’s worth) and i like it.

siobhan has been tied up in some shed in the woods and endo (the potential boyfriend) is feeling bad about it but is unwilling to untie her, god. (quick detour, though: i’ve been wondering this since the beginning of the episode, but how is siobhan even at the hpd academy now? i was under the impression during her first appearance this season that she was in her last year of high school, so when did she even graduate?)

i do feel for endo (which i like! it’s cool to see a Bad Guy be not pure evil but believably conflicted), but leaving your almost-girlfriend in a cabin in the woods for your godfather to “take care of it” with a sad look and “i’m really sorry” is not the best of moves, my dude.

tani and quinn: we have good news! hpd intercepted endo and steve and lou are about to question him! adam: [sweats]

endo lies his ass off in interrogation which makes him interesting but also costs him a lot of sympathy points from my end.

lou pretty much assaults endo while he’s cuffed to a chair in the interrogation room. i get why these emotions make for good tv, but uh, hm, maybe five-0 should at some point consider a policy of not letting people who are personally involved in cases near suspects, because this does kind of seem to keep happening.

jfdkfd, adam confronts endo in lock-up, endo taunts him and says adam can’t tell anyone in five-0 what he knows because he’d have to tell them how he knows endo, the team finds out that endo has yakuza ties and go to confront endo about it and he’s gone. omfg, adam, how are you managing to fuck your own life up this effectively in such a short amount of time, after you fought all those years to get away from everything you’re doing now?

siobhan gets herself free!!! and then runs right into guys with guns outside the cabin, of course, because this is tv timing, but still, WELL DONE.

fdjkfdkjfd, adam’s brilliant plan to solve the situation is to call up the rival yakuza boss and threaten to kill his godson out of revenge. this is. this is maybe not a great idea.

adam: “in case you haven’t been paying attention, kenji, i’m not afraid of much these days.” oh adam, buddy, don’t brag about misplacing the entirety of your common sense.

the team is watching adam load endo into the back of a car on tape and it’s honestly kind of hilarious. steve asks danny how he would explain this and that’s hilarious, too, because they’re seeing their (ex-?)friend load a stolen suspect into a car to run off with him, thereby betraying all of them and everything they stand for, and steve is taking this opportunity to turn to danny and go “see, i was right”. fjdkfd.

steve’s gut says adam will come through for them in delivering siobhan, and we all know steve’s gut is secretly psychic, so that’s a spoiler. :p

and it does happen!!! i’m glad to see bonnie back in a safe place.

oh god. adam randomly appears from between the foilage to look serious and share a meaningful nod with steve. is he... is he officially on the other side now? they’re not still going to let him be part of five-0, are they?

domestic steve and danny in the(ir) kitchen!!! steve is giving eddie danny’s breakfast!!! and then there’s something about endo having hacked into hpd’s database, because of course they need to attach some ongoing threat to this, but honestly, who cares about plot when there’s “don’t shame my dog. i’m cooking you eggs, alright?” and danny saying steve doesn’t have to cook him eggs but steve already doing it anyway while danny is once again randomly sitting on the kitchen counter and steve cuts danny off before danny can request his eggs a little burned because steve already knows how danny likes his eggs, obviously, because steve is a stalker when it comes to danny. yes!! this is stuff i like a lot.

danny is saying he could probably get out of steve’s space soon and steve has the excuse of very intently (and yet somehow also very badly, it looks like) scrambling those eggs, but he’s also definitely, 100% avoiding looking at danny in that moment, and then he starts saying how there’s no paint yet and that’s bad and danny should stay. just. just move in together officially, you guys. just do it. nobody would be surprised. you know it would make both of you very happy. this is not even a ship thing, but just, oh my god, these two humans so clearly want to be in each other’s space and they keep coming up with excuses and getting this close to admitting that maybe neither of them wants danny to leave and then yelling at each other about eggs and how it’s not bacon day. it can be bacon day, steve. it could even be pancake day. it could be pancake day every day for the rest of your natural lives if you just told danny you wanted that.

overall, this was a very fun episode! i’m honestly just really happy with this season in general - quinn being added to the team does maybe not look like much progress on the subject of female characters, because she’s just one person, but there have been SO MANY scenes of her and tani together by now and genuinely, their friendship is healing my soul and watering my crops. i’m still not sure what to make of the adam subplot, but if they’re doing what it kind of looks like they’re doing - permanently putting him on the other side of the fence, back with the yakuza - that could actually be somewhat interesting. i’m just really, really scared that even after all of this they’re going to try to give him some kind of redemption arc that just has no chance of making sense anymore after everything that’s happened.

[darkdevasofdestruction]

Hey can you do a Robin x reader fic with the reader is in college and also being Dustin’s sister? Robin convinced that Henderson!reader has a thing for Steve? Rating anything just Robin stumbling over how much she has a thing for Dustin’s sister and being sad about the Steve thing even though there is no thing?

After a very long year full of supernatural idiocies, your friends and little brother getting in fatal trouble and all that, a full year of college normalcy away from Hawkins was what you needed to get back on track with your mental health and emotional safety, and now that Summer holiday came once again, you were very happy to be reunited with your family.

Dustin told you that Steve was still working part time at Scoops Ahoy, even after the horrible events at Starcourt, and Robin was there too, so you just HAD to go and see them, you missed them so much.

Of course, you arranged yourself more attentively than usual since it was an important day today, so make up, a nice hairstyle and a pretty outfit were perfect - Nobody would realise you were a huge nerd and geek...Not that you minded. It was your whole life and happiness.

As soon as you stepped in the parlor, you noticed Steve and ran to him, jumping over the counter and hugged him tightly, kissing his cheek and spinning around with him, chanting his name.

“Steve! Steve! Steve! Gosh, how I’ve missed you! It’s really been a whole year, hasn’t it?! Can you believe it?! I sure as hell can’t!” you exclaim happily, letting go of him and analysing him from head to toe. “That hat still doesn’t do your hair any justice.” you laughed, leaning on the counter.“Yes, it’s been a year...Honestly, Y/N, I don’t know if I’d rather face College Horror or Monster Horror again.” he smirked, shaking his head. “But you sure look fresh as a daisy, I’m glad to see that.” he continued, then banged on the little slide-open door, only to be opened by your favourite girl.“Robin!!” your eyes sparkled as you chirped her name.“Our fave girl has returned from College Nightmare, Buckley, don’tcha wanna greet her properly?” Steve asked, motioning for her to get out of there.“Nice to see you back, Y/N! Came here for some free ice cream?” she smirked, already preparing your favourite.“Oh my God, your desserts are always the best! I swear, Robin, you are the best! Hey, why don’t we hang out at my house tonight? Get some booze, play some games, watch some movies? Sounds good? Dustin’s gonna stay over at Mike’s tonight.” you suggested with a sly look on your face.“Sure, why not. It’s been a while since we’ve hung out like that. And it will be nice to have Robin around too, now.” he shrugged. “We finish in two hours, you can prepare everything for our sleep over and we’ll bring the good stuff, ‘kay?” he said, making you  nod vigurously.“Hell yes! See ya later!” you hugged them both and rushed outside to make preparations.

All day you only thought of how to finally ask Robin out.

She’s been in your head all year and you couldn’t, for the love of anything good in this world, get rid of those thoughts about her, so might as well pursue them now.

The only people who knew of this crush were Dustin and Steve, which now seemed to be like literal Father and Son, which you were very happy about.You got to warm up around Steve after he started taking care of and protecting your little brother during all that mess with the demodogs, and from then on, you started hanging around.

After you finished Highschool, Steve started working at Scoops Ahoy, while you decided to volunteer at a place to make your CV better for your future career, so while you didn’t get to hang out too much, you got the privilege of meeting Robin, who was honestly the most beautiful and intriguing girl you’ve ever met.

Unfortunately, you were always much too shy to ask her out, especially knowing how same-sex relationships were seen around, and you were afraid of making her hate you, so being friends was the next best thing, and as long as she was happy, you were happy as well.

Little did you know that the girl thought the exact same things as you were, and even more, she thought you were in love with Steve, seeing how close you were with each other, and she started feeling darker feelings pitting in her stomach.

Night soon came by and your two friends finally arrived, ready to change in their PJs and you gathered in the living room, music loud and preparing for the booze games.

“What should we start with? Truth or Dare, Spin the Bottle, Never have I ever...?” you trailed off, thinking of what games to play.“Let’s start with Never have I ever. It’s good for a big round of shots, right?” Seve suggested, opening the vodka bottle and pouring in the glasses.“Okay, sounds good! So, let’s see...Never have I ever...Uhhh....Fuck, I don’t know...Never have I ever gone to a rock concert.” you finally managed to blurt out, then saw Robin chuckle and Steve rolling his eyes, taking a shot.“Woaw, dingus, you sure are as lame as you look.” she snorted, making you giggle.“I mean, did you see how that sailor hat looks on him? Clearly, he’s so lame, he’s kinda like...A super innocent adorable kind of lame!” you exclaimed, making him groan as you laughed, not realising Robin was biting her lip in anger.“Okay, okay, whatever, my turn. Never have I ever went out on a date that went horribly bad.” Steve said, making the both of you drink and laugh at the memories, yet Robin looked down, not drinking.“Like, d’you remember how horribly bad that date with what’s-his-name went? He was so freaking boring that I had to pretend to go to the bathroom, call you to come rescue me, and then we spent the whole night watching movies, trash-talking him and eating ice cream?” you laughed remembering the awkward situation as you drank the shot.“Or that girl I tried to date after Nancy and I accidentally called her by that name...And just then I realised I didn’t even know what her name was. She made me pay the pizza bill but ate none of it, so I called you to come over and help me finish everything.” he nudged you a bit rougher than intended, making you laugh like idiots.“We’re idiots. But, Robin, you didn’t drink. Does that mean that all your dates went well? I’m so happy to hear that!” you grinned at her gently, but she shook her head.“I didn’t get to date anyone, actually.” she shrugged, looking away.“Aww, come on, Robin, don’t get upset! You’re a lovely girl, I’ve never seen anyone funnier, smarter and more beautiful than you! Every guy would be lucky to date someone like you.” you encouraged her, but she only breathed out a soft laugh.“Never have I ever had a crush on someone of the same sex.” Robin declared, making the both of you drink a shot, look at each other with a soft blush, than look away.“Glad to hear I’m not the only one here. Then again...Come on, King Steve, didn’t you like Billy even a little bit? The way he’d hover over your body, all sweaty and panting, calling your name so confidently...” you smirked, slurring a bit, making him groan and fall on the ground.“Fuck Hargrove, okay? He’s lucky he got out alive of that whole Mindflayer shit and moved back to Cali for Uni. If I have to hear one more King Steve from his mouth, I swear I’ll shave him and make him eat his stupid mullet.” Steve threatened, making you fall back with drunken laughter too.“You wish he’d fuck you, man. He’s good, I’m sure of that.” you giggled, poking his sides.“Shut up.” Steve murmured. “Imma go get some snacks from the kitchen...Or vomit.” he left the room, making you roll on your side, smirking at Robin.“Who’s the lucky lady you crushed or are crushing on, Robin, dear~?” you tried to press, making her look away a bit.“She’s...Very smart. She’s at Uni now, going into her 2nd year at a prestigious Uni. She’s the most beautiful girl I’ve ever met, she’s soft like an angel and nobody would realise she’s such a damn nerd...And I think she’s crushing or dating Steve.” she mumbled, downing a shot.“Woaw, she sure sounds like a nice girl. You know...I think you should tell her. You never know who she likes, do you? And assumptions aren’t always what they look like. Also...Who the hell would choose Steve over you? You’re a million dollar babe, okay? Steve is just a...A...” you tried to find the perfect word, but she beat you to it, with a gentle smile on her face. “A dingus?”“Oh, gosh, yeah, that was it! Nice one, Robin!” you high fived her, but ended up losing balance and lazily hugging her, giggling.“Do you like Steve, Y/N?” she asked, making you laugh.“Steve? Yeah, he’s like, my best friend and all, what’s not to like about him? He’s an idiot but he saved my baby brother so now we’re friends.” you explained, making her nod at you, looking at you without breaking eye contact.“Yes, but...Do you...Like him? Like-Love him?” she pressed on, making you gag and snort.“Ew, no, jeez, it would be like dating Dustin. So awkward and weird. No way in hell...Besides...The crush I have on a girl? You’re that girl, Robin. I’ve been thinkin’ ‘bout you the whole damn year and I couldn’t get you out of my mind. I was just too much of a coward to ever say it out loud, but this idiot here and the other mini-idiot kept pestering me to finally ask you out...Guess I needed to get tipsy as hell to get that courage, huh?”  you grinned shyly, burying your face in the crook of her neck.“Wanna have our first date tomorrow, then? Go to the movies, eat something, walk around, go to the arcade, stargaze at night...” she offered, making you put your arms around her neck and kiss her cheek.“Sounds like the perfect date, if you ask me.” you hugged her tightly, making her lay on the floor so you could cuddle up to her easier.“Huh...This was so easy...And to think I was jealous on Harrington ‘cause I thought you liked him. So stupid.” she snorted, making you giggle, caressing her cheek.“Steve...Who? He’s nothing compared to you, so forget about him. Tonight it’s just the two of us, this annoyingly loud music that’s gonna give me a hangover migrane very soon, and this vodka that just screams to be downed in one go...Uh...What was I saying?”  you raised your eyebrow, a bit confused, having lost your train of thought.“Just that you love me, dear. Just that. And I love you too and I’m glad you got drunk enough to confess to me.” she leaned on her side, pressing her plump and soft lips to yours softly, a sweet smile gracing her features.“Damn, you’re beautiful, Robin. Will you be my girlfriend?” you asked, making her chuckle a bit, kissing your forehead.“Any day, any time, love. Any time.” she answered, softly.“Oi, guys, what the hell is going on here?! I know you love each other, but come on, don’t make this +18, okay? ...Argh, never mind, just go sleep in the bedroom, I’ll sleep on the couch...Jeez...” he groaned, drinking some water and crashing on the couch with a pout.“What, Harrington, are you jealous I’m dating Y/N and you’re not?” she smirked as you two sat up, her arm around your waist, putting you very close to her.“Nahh, not jealous, just happy for you. About time, really, she’s been gushing about you all year over the phone, I was about ready to just tell you myself about all this.” he shrugged, ushering the two of you to the bedroom.“I have a TV in my room, so we can watch some really good slasher movies and cuddle?” you asked, kissing her again.“Dream date!” she smirked, dragging you to your bedroom, ready to get the night started with her new girlfriend.

[amorremanet]

top 5 movies? and why? no no TOP FIVE BOOKS

oh gosh, both of these are hard and my answers for them are probably so boring (they also come with the, “this is just how I feel right now because ugh, I am the worst at picking any all-time faves for broad categories”) — but!!

top “five” movies:

The Prince of Egypt — has some of the most beautiful art that I’ve ever seen, anywhere, and music that sticks with you, and it really shows the human drama and human stakes of such a classic story in ways that a lot of adaptations of Biblical mythology are afraid to do

Deadpool — because I’m garbage, the characters are great, the script is pretty good, and the movie makes me laugh. It’s not really a deconstruction (in the way that some people make it out to be, by way of justifying why they like it), and it’s not super-intellectual, and in a lot of ways, it’s like a giant #SorryNotSorry that makes fun of superhero movie tropes while continuing to use them (and there are some subtle ways it plays with some of said tropes and twists them around, but it largely doesn’t) — but it’s fun

But I’m A Cheerleader — is far from perfect, and I maintain that it’s actually much more depressing than the ending leads us to believe (I mean, Meghan/Graham and Dolph/Clayton get together and escape from True Directions and homophobic parents, and Meghan’s Mom and Dad at least try to do better by their daughter, but things don’t work out that well for anybody else), but it’ll always have a special place in my heart because it was one of the only lesbian movies that I had access to as a little gay baby

Female Trouble — I wouldn’t say that it’s the best thing that John Waters has ever done, just the one that I personally like the best, and I’ll admit that it’s probably an acquired taste…… but I love how it takes on celebrity culture in the story Dawn Davenport, and it gave us great lines like, “The world of heterosexual is a sick and boring life” and, “I wouldn’t suck your lousy dick if I was suffocating and there was oxygen in your balls!” It also has a special place in my heart as one of my favorite, “gay AND weird” movies

—which probably makes sense, given that it was written and directed by the trash king of being gay and weird

……like, seriously. My (best friend who I call my) brother once asked me, “So is John Waters gay or is he just really weird?” and the only thing I could think of to say to that was, “Yes, both.”

the “Three Flavours Cornetto” trilogy — which is totally cheating, to put three in here, but I couldn’t pick between them. I do think that Hot Fuzz and The World’s End are more fully actualized than Shaun of the Dead, but I love all of them, and the reason is pretty much just, “Because they’re good mixes of being hilarious and making me FEEL things” (……less so in The World’s End, for several reasons; it’s a lot heavier on the feels, to the point that you sometimes feel bad for laughing at the jokes, but still)

and books:

Good Omens (Terry Pratchett & Neil Gaiman) — This book was my introduction to both PTerry and GNeil, after I found a cheap copy in an airport bookstore when I was about twelve and immediately fell in love. It’s funny, the characters are vibrant and engaging, and it played right into my love of screwing around with Biblical mythology.

I’m periodically tempted to list different books for both of those men (with PTerry’s probably being one of the Granny Weatherwax books, or Faust Eric, and GNeil’s being either American Gods or one of his Sandman books — because yeah, he’s done other good stuff, but I’m more sentimentally attached to AG and Sandman. Also, Preludes and Nocturnes has some of the only non-movie or TV horror that has genuinely terrified me, so)

—buuuut then I never do, because Good Omens was my first book from either of them, and remains my sentimental fave, even though I admit that they’ve both written other books that are, “better” or, “stronger,” or whatever

Dry (Augusten Burroughs) — There’s a lot of fair criticism to be made of Augusten Burroughs, and he’s been one of the writers at the center of the debates about truthfulness or lack thereof in popular memoirs (like, how much an author is allowed to condense things before it stops counting as a, “real story,” and how an author remembers things happening vs. how other people remember them), but Dry nevertheless means a lot to me.

Like, I enjoyed Running with Scissors and his novel, Sellevision (which were the other Big Deals in his collected works, at the time I originally read Dry), but Dry fucked me up a LOT when I first read it. It has continued to fuck me up ever since.

There are passages in this book that I can’t even be jealous of, as another writer, because they’re so good that they skip right the fuck past, “I’m angry and jealous that I didn’t write this myself” and into, “Holy shit, THIS is why I write, the ability to do THIS KIND OF THING EXACTLY with words, I need to go write something right now”

Also, it means a lot to me for sentimental, “I read this book for the first time when I was in high school, and it made me feel less lonely and sad and scared” reasons

Dynamic Characters (Nancy Kress) — This is by no means the be-all and end-all of, “how to writer better” books, but it’s a personal favorite of mine, for two reasons: 1. there are some things that Kress doesn’t cover about creating characters and doing better by them in your writing, but she’s still pretty comprehensive and offers some solid illustrative examples, multiple perspectives on this part of writing (not as many as she could, but to be fair, she only has so many pages to work with), and a good mix of “tough love” advice and gentler, more reassuring advice;

and 2. …it was the first, “how to writer better” book that I ever got my hands on. I picked it out specifically because I’d posted a completely ridiculous crack fic that was a crossover between Harry Potter and Sailor Moon, with a first-person protagonist narrator who was a hot nonsense self-insert power fantasy Mary Sue with no flaws and no nuance because, hey, I was 11.

And someone actually commented to go, “Hey, look, you have talent, but you could do better and one place to start is maybe with learning to build better realized characters” — so I picked out the Nancy Kress book and it seems like a really silly thing to call a turning point? But it was big a turning point for me

Death, Disability, and the Superhero: The Silver Age and Beyond (José Alaniz) — okay, time for me to be a loser and cite an academic book. I’m also probably a cheating loser, since I just read this book for the first time recently…… but with that said? I’ve read a LOT of critical treatments of the superhero genre, some pretty good, others pretty bad (for example, I remain Perpetually Tired of Slavoj Žižek’s heavy metal Communist, Bane in Leather Pants bullshit reading of The Dark Knight Returns), and most of it somewhere in the middle

—but there’s this trend among people who write critically about superhero junk, whether they’re academics of not, wherein we act like we have to act like superhero comics are The Most Progressive Ever and oversell their sociopolitical impact in order to make them look like ~*True Art*~ That Must Be Taken Seriously (—and like, I’m not saying that they have NO impact on people at all, because that’s objectively false. But you also can’t try to claim that Superman, Wonder Woman, and Captain America comics are why the Allies won World War II)

(this is a pointless aside to note that I deliberately left the Goddamn Batman off that list, because while Supes, Diana, and Steve were all off punching Nazis, Golden Age Bruce and white boy!Dick were running around on the home-front, rounding up Japanese Americans and putting them in internment camps. So… y’know. There’s that.)

……or we have to take legitimate criticisms of problems in the superhero genre, both historical and current, and use them to go, “Therefore, the entire genre is pointless garbage that has no redeeming qualities at all and could never ever EVER be used to tell any stories that are worth telling, and frankly, you are all terrible, horrible people for enjoying it, how very dare you enjoy that X-Men movie or that Red Hood And The Outlaws comic, you’re basically a fascist now”

—which is hilarious, to me, because the people who write that sort of criticism almost always cite Fredric Wertham’s book, The Seduction of the Innocent (aka: the book that led to so much moral outrage over the allegedly very gay and fascistic, child-corrupting content of comicbooks that the Comics Code Authority was created), and they always go, “Well, obviously Wertham was OTT and totally full of shit, buuuut…… *argument that would not have been out of place in his book*”

So, one of the big reasons I loved Professor Alaniz’s book is that is does neither of these things. It offers some incisive, and occasionally kinda damning, critique of the superhero genre and its handling of disability and mortality, but he does so from a place of love and enjoyment, and never pretends to hate the genre, nor argues for throwing the whole thing out because it has problems.

Like, his underlying mindset is very much, “Yes, the superhero genre has a LOT of problems, but people could, in theory, fix them and try to get closer to realizing the full potential of what these characters and stories can do” — while never skimping on a detailed analysis of the trends and case studies that he presents.

Sometimes, I think he’s kinda reaching (and I, personally, never want to hear anything about Doctor Doom’s Oedipus complex ever again so long as I live, though it was validating to hear that my theatre kids AU version of him — who is a ridiculous mess, obsessed with taking selfies, and perpetually acting like he totally gets everything while missing some crucial detail, which is how he ends up thinking that Loki is dating Tony Stank [a suggestion that makes both of them want to puke] — is actually a valid interpretation of his character, based on some parts of canon)

Overall, though, my biggest problem with Professor Alaniz’s book is that he can be kind of a hipster and it can get a little bit annoying. Not enough to ruin the whole book, but enough that it does stand out.

Like, his chapter on Daredevil specifically analyzes an infamous Silver Age story that basically everyone hated — the one where Matt Murdock tells Karen and Foggy that he isn’t the Devil of Hell’s Kitchen, but he has some heretofore unknown identical twin brother named Mike, who is not blind but *IS* actually that aforementioned costumed hero, and carries on a charade of pretending to be his nonexistent twin brother — and okay, we get some pretty neat discussion of how passing can work or might not with disabled people

…but you can still walk away feeling like his biggest reason for analyzing that story arc was less about its value to any part of his discussion, and more about going, “Other Daredevil stories are too mainstream, I care most about this one that was so infamously ridiculous that people have said even soap operas wouldn’t have done this plot”

Likewise, I’m not saying that there aren’t very fair criticisms to be made of the X-Men and how their stories handle disability in particular… but at some points in his chapter on the Silver Age Doom Patrol comics, Professor Alaniz seems to be less, “using the pre-Claremont Silver Age X-Men stories as an illustrative foil to the Doom Patrol, especially with regard to how Charles’s paraplegia is treated vs. how The Chief’s paraplegia is treated” and more, “using this discussion as a free excuse to bash on the X-Men for being popular”

To his credit, Professor Alaniz does kinda discuss some of the ways that the X-Men’s popularity might have been affected by the fact that things like their ableist handling of Charles make them feel, “safer” and, “less sociopolitically threatening” than he makes the Doom Patrol out to be (with a pretty convincing argument, actually)

He just doesn’t do it enough for me to feel like his “criticism” of the X-Men isn’t at least partially grounded in going, “Well, it’s popular, therefore it sucks” (—as opposed to my approach to them, which is, “It’s popular, and has a mixed bag of things that it does well vs. things it does that suck, but it does not suck BECAUSE it is popular”)

Anyway, good book, and it’s written in a refreshingly accessible way (it’s still an academic book and harder to get into than, say, Good Omens, but Professor Alaniz doesn’t make a lot of the more common mistakes that leave a lot of academic writing effectively incomprehensible)

and last but not least…… Harry Potter and The Goblet of Fire (we all know who wrote this, okay, come on) — because I’d be lying if I didn’t include at least one HP book on this list, considering how important those books and that fandom have been to the course of my life and to my development as a writer, and it was either gonna be this one or POA, but this one won over the other because I’m garbage

[five-wow]

my (as always very elaborate) thoughts on 9.16 are under the cut! ✨

mermaids!!! i knew they were coming, but i have to make the (for people in roughly my age group) obvious joke: am i watching h50 or h2o? [cue recorded audience laughter]

oh god, the sudden bleeding? that’s very dramatic in the water, and i like the visuals of that a lot (in a “oh no that’d be horrifying in reality but is a really cool idea in fiction” way)

adam is moving house and i like that they’re showing that! i also appreciate the way he’s doing it all on his own and making kind of a mess of it, aw, but to be honest, i was just kind of watching him putter around and appreciating the props department for getting him all that stuff to unpack, and then suddenly, boom, KONO. in a picture, but still, it’s so good to see her face on this show again!! (even if it’s in a sad, adam-needs-to-let-go-of-his-past context which would not necessarily be my first choice)

okay. OKAY. this may be the point at which i have to admit that i never cared for adam overly much. i don’t dislike him, not at all, but i’ve been a little confused about his character at times and i didn’t necessarily want him to stick around after kono left, so i’m a little wary, still - which i’m mostly just saying because this, this right now, adam bringing a homeless guy sandwiches and respectfully learning sign language from him and earnestly asking about things going on in this man’s life? that kind of makes me love adam a bit, holy shit. THIS is what i want from his character, not all the weird yakuza subplots where he somehow always still has strong ties to criminals and new deep secrets despite supposedly completely having left that life behind half a decade ago

tani loves mermaids!!! i love that tani loves mermaids!!! it’s so fun seeing her be all excited and gushy to danny

danny: [some statistics about women using poison as a murder weapon] noelani: “for the record, we’re just as capable of using a gun or a knife.” tani: “ha haa! my sister!” LOVE THIS. GIVE ME MORE OF THIS.

a pyramid scheme! they’re dipping into a lot of relevant topics this season.

fjdkfdjk adam brings the homeless guy (do we know his name yet? i missed it oops) the purple elephant that the man wanted for his granddaughter and then adam hands him another bag and he goes “i get an elephant too??” and i laughed so hard, omg. that is ridiculously cute!!

IT’S CLOTHES. AND ADAM WANTS TO GIVE HIM A HAIRCUT. I’M CRYING. which isn’t even an exaggeration, i’m literally tearing up. i’m weak for this, why haven’t they always been doing this with adam’s character

tani and junior!!! i love basically anything that’s tani and junior, is what i’m growing to realize, because they, too, are SO CUTE

junior: “a little birdie did tell me this morning that you were pretty jealous at the mermaid camp.” tani: “um, did this birdie have a blond pompadour and talk with his hands?” things i adore about this: a) tani and junior being cute, obviously, b) “a little birdie”, c) “BLOND POMPADOUR”, and d) the implication that danny immediately told junior about tani’s enthusiasm (which sounds like some low key matchmaking to me, tbh)

tani’s story about her dad??? junior’s EYES when he watches her??? i keep being surprised over and over by how much i love them together even though i should definitely know that by now because it’s been this way pretty much from the start

danny’s phone starts ringing and it looks like he doesn’t even look at the screen before putting it to his ear and going “yes, steve”

kamekona’s story? i’m crying. again.

ALSO, i’m really happy that kamekona is bringing that up, actually: it’s good that adam wants to help his friend, but he can’t decide for the guy that it’s time to make a big step like mending bridges with his family. a helping hand is good, it’s amazing even, but the actual decision to change needs to come from the person in question, and as a friend you need to let this person make that decision on their own.

kamekona: “sometimes you have to ask yourself if you’re doing this for him, or for yourself.” i LOVE it when kamekona drops some serious knowledge. he’s so often a comic relief character, but he’s been through some shit and he knows his stuff, and seeing him dole out wisdom like this? always a gift.

adam talks to his friend (al? hal? he used a name but i’m still not sure what it is exactly) and this episode, god, it’s hellbent on getting me to reach for a tissue every other scene.

the look between danny and steve when danny says some smartass thing about steve’s dog? fjdfdjk. that’s all.

shooting suspects dead on sight is coming back to bite them in the ass! this guy knew something they kind of needed to know too, so, uh, oops.

THEY PUT THE DEAD GUY IN THE PASSENGER SEAT WITH A HAT AND SUNGLASSES. they full on weekend at bernie’s’d this guy, I’M YELLING

danny with the kids!!! he’s so soft around kids and it makes my heart feel soft, too

depressing sidenote, though: this woman’s husband was shot through the head by the Bad Guys, right? and she’s going to prison for murder and other illegal activities, which means she’ll probably be there a while? the relief for these kids will be very short-lived, fuck.

team dinner at adam’s! good stuff

adam gets up and says “you guys all know what i’ve been through this past year” and we get a looong shot of danny’s face. is it very bitter of me if in the context of where recent episodes seem to be headed, i kind of hope he’s thinking about how horrible divorces are and how wrecked he was when he went through that with rachel and how it might mean they weren’t meant to be?

adam: “and then- just when i thought i lost my whole family, i looked up and- and you were all there.” oh SHIT. this episode is giving me adam feels like i never even thought was POSSIBLE. (also: ohana feels. that’s a smart play when it comes to hitting me right in the heart.)

HAL’S GRANDDAUGTHER. FEELS.

also: here’s the bit in the background with steve biting (licking?) danny’s arm or hand, omfg. blurry but beautiful. blurrtiful. (did i just reference my own fic? yes, i did.)

so i’ve said a couple of times already that i was crying. i’m going to have to say it now AGAIN because TANI’S FREAKOUT when she realizes what junior is giving her? MY HEART. FUCK. i don’t know if it’s just one of those days for me or if this is a normal reaction to this episode, but people freaking out with happiness? TANI, who i love, freaking out with happiness? YES. THAT WILL GET ME TO CRY.

JUNIOR, by the way. JUNIOR IS SO SWEET. junior and tani are i-need-a-dentist-now levels of cute together, but i also need to give junior his own shoutout here, because this is just him being thoughtful and nice and i love him a lot for it.

junior: “when you do cross me, i am blasting this thing on social media. i just have to join it first.” OH SWEETHEART

tani gets to swim with her mermaid tail! tani has her mermaid experience! tani is fucking ecstatic and i’m so happy for her!!!

last thoughts: while i like the entire cast a lot, i won’t deny that usually danny and steve are the main reason i watch, so, for an episode that had relatively little danny or steve in it and almost no danny&steve at all, it’s awesome how this still managed to COMPLETELY get me on board for the whole thing. i enjoyed this SO MUCH, gosh. i ship junior/tani harder than ever, i unexpectedly cried a lot and i have a whole new appreciation for adam! many good things!!! i’m so happy, yay