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wheelygoodteddys · 5 years

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I don't want to do this!:

I absolutely hate writing about religious discrimination!

Frankly, I wish that I wasn't putting fingers to keyboard about any discrimination.

I also desperately don't want the focus to be on discrimination against everything Islamic and Muslim.

However, sadly, it's the most venomous hated that I have ever encountered, second only to racism against the black human beings of our world.

All my life I must have lived under a rock, maybe I live under a rock now, yet the vileness and outright lies that come out of those obsessed with hating all Islam and Muslims, plus anyone who stands up and says this is wrong, is obscene.

I am disgusted in the way these people respond.

I have had differing opinions with both Muslim men are women yet been addressed with respect and politeness. They are peaceful and not intimidating in any way.

Speak to a person who is anti Muslim, they refuse to listen to anything that may contradict what they want to believe, they will call you a liar and slander you. They intimidate and bully, call you names, question your mental stability, stalk your FB and target your children. The insults and illogical reasoning is unbelievable.

I am horrified that there are people like this in the world!

More horrifying still is for once I can see the appeal in hating the West.

Imagine a young Muslim man, born here, and rather then allowing him to explain what his religion means to him, to try and teach people, that hate everything about him, that he deserves to be not discriminated against, he gets told what his religion is, he is called a murder, a terrorist, a paedophile, a Mysoginist, etc. His sister is spoken to about her husband beating her, being oppressed, asked if she still has her clitorus, threatened with physical abuse, has her hijab torn off, threatened with rape, told she is a bad mother because she sells her baby girls to be raped by old men.

And no matter what they say to try and explain their actual beliefs the abuse flows. And this is from their own countrymen.

Mate, I would want them all gone too! Be honest, who wouldn't!?

Yet if they report abuse or complain about their treatment they are accused of wanting to change things. "They come here and try to change everything", is the cry from the haters!

1) There is NO law that insists that ALL women wear a Burqa in Saudi Arabia: Hijab is only compulsory for Muslim women. Anything else is a choice for those in a practicing Muslim family.

2) Women are not allowed to get an education in Saudi Arabia: I urge you to look up any TV broadcast from local Saudi Arabia telecasts. Women, in hijab, reading the news. This suggests an education. However, both men and women are encouraged to gain knowledge in Islam.

3) WTF does Saudi Arabia have to do with every other Muslim world wide, especially in Australia?

4) FGM (female genital mutilation) is an Islamic practice: Far from it! The Islamic religion urges that both men and women enjoy sex and that a man sexually pleases his wife. FGM is a tribal practice. However, MGM (male genital mutilation) has and still is widely practiced in Australia.

5) There is NO "no go" zones in Australia!: This urban myth was started by a female, Canadian Islamphobe. It was said to be proved when the police removed her from Lakemba for disturbing the peace. The police weren't working for the Muslims to enforce their "no go" zones! How ridiculous. Others tell totally unbelievable stories about women walking there and being spat on for not wearing hijab. Firstly, not all Muslimah wear hijab, even in Lakemba. Also there are numerous non-Muslims that go to these fabled areas to eat, visit, shop, do business, etc. This rumor is absolutely ludicrous!

6) Muslim women are oppressed, even here in Australia!: It is naive that there is no abusive people in any religion or walk of life, however, Muslimah are not oppressed as perf the usual course. Quiet the opposite! Historically, and as it is today, Muslimah have the freedom to do and be whatever they want, just like Muslim men. There is no distinction between what male and females can do. In fact, men are encouraged to wash their own clothes, cook and do housework. Also the Qur'an makes it very clear that the mother is the head of the household.

7) It is always claimed that Muslims want to change things: Yet, the question, "what have they actually changed?", goes unanswered. Muslims are required to live by the laws of the land, and as such, really don't want to change anything but the way they are treated. Especially how the women are treated. Our hero Islamphobes always target women and children because Muslimah are more recognizable.

8) Why are these people so threatened by the hijab or niqab?: For fuck sake it's a piece of material! It's not what's on a woman's head that oppresses her. However, who are those that want to oppress Muslimah? Muslim men or the Islamphobe? I say without hesitation, the Islamphobe! They don't ask a Muslim women how she feels, they don't ask what she may want to wear. They rarely comprehend the meaning of the hijab to a woman but rather try to twist it into some sexually perverse. They proclaim that Muslim women shouldn't wear a head covering. As Australia is a free country, with a freedom of religion and freedom of lawful individually, the real oppression and discrimination, is telling Muslim women what to wear.

9) Telling Muslim women what they are: The idea that, to Islamphobes, Muslim women are stupid and therefore, don't know that they are oppressed, would have to be the most Mysoginist slap in the face ever! All I can say is, "at least Muslim men know a woman's worth is awesome".

10) Muslim men marry girl babies of 5 to 6 years old and Muslim mothers allow it: Firstly, American is the place booming in child brides at the moment. With some states having no minimum age for marriage and also no divorce for women. Compared to Malaysian Clerics, years ago, raising the age of concent to 18. Also contrary to European/western/Christian culture, women have been granted divorce since the 700s in Islam.

11) Women wear the Burqa in Australia: This is actually one of those urban myths, started by Pauline Hanson. To see a Burqa in Australia would be very unusual. Most Australian Muslimah are from cultures that don't don the Burqa. The Burqa is an Afghan tradition and is very rare in Australia. Then why fight "ban the Burqa"? In one word, principle! It is against a woman's basic rights to tell her how much she can or can't wear, within the laws of public decency. There is also a security argument, as a Burqa is rarely worn that argument is rather moot.

12) Muslim men have lots of wives and children and just live on welfare: This is so silly that it's laughable. Once again, it is rare for Muslim men to have more than one wife these days as it is financially impractical. Also most Muslim men prefer one wife. In Australia, on average, the Muslim family consists of 2 children. With all this being said, usually Muslim men and women are educated and professional people. If not they strive to own businesses. The stupid welfare claims are unfounded and actually go against most Muslim traditions and cultures that have a hard work ethic.

13) They come here are get more welfare than Australians with no waiting period: This information can be researched on government websites. There is a waiting time for new Australians, Muslim or otherwise, which often means charitable families that sponsor them and take them in during this time. When they do receive any benefit, before getting on their feet, it is no more or less than anyone else.

14) They receive a thousand dollar iPhone and designer clothes as soon as they arrive: Is this one even worth answering? I just shake my head in disbelief!

15) Muslims have been Australians for generations: It amazes me how many people actually believe that no Muslim is Australian born. The history of the Islamic people in Australia predates white colonization. Islamic men from Indonesia travelled down and through Australia. There was intermarriage with the Indigenous peoples and even revertion to Islam by some. A more constant move to Australia, by those of the Islamic faith, started in the 1800's.

16) All Muslims are the same because they read from the same book: this is like saying that all Christian denominations are the same because they read from the same book. Most know that this is not the case.

There are many different varieties of Muslim. Yes they have the Qur'an yet addition books vary between the sects.

There are 72 different sects, numerous sects within the main sects, different traditions, different cultures, different regions, different regions, different countries and different families.

As for the Qur'an: there is the subject context, further context, overall context, historical context and spiritual context. Then all the different ways it is interpreted. Also interpretation can be manipulated and cherry picked to suit an agenda or bias. This can be said of the Bible also.

Where interpretation is important is in the understanding of Arabic. To translate a language as complex as Arabic into simple English leaves the meaning truly lacking.

For example: Islam is a very sexually moral religion. Men and women are not meant to sexulise each other, There is no unsupervised dating and dressing is modest. However, it is commonly thought the men will receive a bus load of virgins to have an orgy with in paradise. However, "virgin" more correctly translates to "pure". This is a "spiritual" context and "heavenly beings/angels is probably a better translation into English.

17) Muslims want to kill all Jews and Muslims. The Qur'an tells them to kill all Christians: Unfortunately people are so off the mark on this one. Islam actually says that Muslims cannot destroy a place of worship nor hurt religious "ministers". The Qur'an refers to Christians and Jews as the "people of the book". In fact, the only other women a Muslim man is permitted to marry is either a Christian or a Jew. The wives of these two religions are also not expect to revert as they are seen as sisters to Islam. Christian and Jewish men and women are thought of as brothers and sisters to Muslims.

There is a long list of urban myth, propaganda, rumors and out right lies that are used as ammunition against Islam and Muslims.

The arrogance of the Islamphobe is to tell a Muslim what their faith is! With no other religion would a person, outside that faith, verse another in their religion.

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rebellect-writes · 4 years

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[SIZE=1][b]Name:[/b] Jess. [b]Age:[/b] 21. [b]How did you find us?:[/b] In the TARDIS’s swimming pool.

[b]Name:[/b] Drew Shamis. [b]Nicknames & Aliases:[/b] Drew works as best as anything. Dew at a push. [b]Age:[/b] 27. [b]Date of Birth:[/b] May 11th 1984 [b]Gender:[/b] Male. [b]Sexual Orientation:[/b] Homosexual. [b]Occupation:[/b] Works at and owns Creature Comforts. [b]Powers:[/b] None.

[b]Face Claim:[/b] Ryan Kwanten. [b]Description:[/b] [IMG]http://www.blogher.com/files/Jason-sized.jpg[/IMG] [i]Height:[/i] 5’10 [i]Weight:[/i] 150lbs. [i]Eyes:[/i] Brown. [i]Hair:[/i] Dirty blond. [i]Build:[/i] Average. [i]Visible marks:[/i] He has a nasty looking scar circling his right wrist from where wire cut to the bone. Also, Drew has a tribal wolf [URL=http://th09.deviantart.net/fs15/150/f/2007/073/6/9/Tribal_Wolf_Bust_and_Paw_by_KMoongangSR.png]tattoo[/URL] on his right shoulder. [i]Style:[/i] Drew’s not the type to spend money on lots of clothes he’d wear once. So he gets and wears what he’s comfortable in. So jeans, t-shirts, boots. If he has to dress up, he will do but he always feels like a clown when he does. Jewellery isn't something he'd normally wear either. The exception to that rule is a gold crucifix that he's had since he was a kid.

[b]Special Skills:[/b] He's good at working on the fly, if that counts. He’s also pretty handy when it comes to slinging out drunks at the bar. [b]Personality:[/b] At first glance, Drew’s the type that smiles and tries to be the friendly type of guy. He may not look it or come off it at times but he’s actually a smart one. He just hides it behind his sometimes dumb looks and useless comments. Drew wants people to be comfortable around him so if he can make people laugh and also laugh at himself, he counts that as win. Now he’s not exactly smart-alecky either, Drew knows when to hold his tongue and stop talking. It’s probably something that he’s picked up and harnessed while working at the bar, who knows.

He’s loyal, stubborn and persistent, and not always in that order. Drew will back friends no matter what because that bond means a lot to him. Former friends fall into his loyalty zone, even if they drag him into some kind of trouble. That’s not to say that he’ll let people walk right over him. He’s more than willing to give a little as long as he receives and if someone’s run out their fourth, fifth and sixth second chance with him, he knows when to call it a day and just walk away. While he may go out of his way to help people and be friendly, Drew’s not an attention seeker and won’t willingly search for it and he’s not exactly great when dragged into the spot light either.

Drew’s known love once, and he’s still in love despite having no idea if Eric is alive or dead. He’s held out hope since he was sixteen that Eric is alive though, and where most people would have moved on and found someone else, Drew hasn’t done so. One night stands don’t appeal to him; women at the pub get turned down or distracted by Ja-Mal while Drew can escape into the office out the back. It’s been over ten years, you’d think that he would have done the sensible thing and let things lie, but he hasn’t. Did I mention that stubborn streak?

On matters regarding the supernatural, Drew’s pretty loud. He doesn’t care if a person has fangs, fur, scales or feathers. They’re still human. He’s not about to go out and cause trouble just because he’s breakable. Drew knows for a fact that a lot of things could end his life, and he’s more than likely to end up in a deadly bar fight than eaten by a ‘monster’. And that’s another thing! He hates the word “monster” being used when referring to preternatural people. The only thing that Drew doesn’t tolerate is when someone kicks off in Creature Comforts, he does have human clients to and his ‘baby’ doesn’t need to be seeing none of that nasty Hollywood monster mojo.

Because people see him as a nice guy, they generally get a shock when he snaps. Drew’s not an angry person by nature and it takes a lot to make him so but when he gets angry, he also gets a little angsty and may slightly paranoid. He’s locked himself away in his office for hours before today and had to be dragged out by his best friend because a delivery had been messed up. He doesn’t like being angry, or scared, or any of those pesky negative emotions because then he can’t help but wonder why he tries so hard. [b]Likes:[/b] [LIST] [*] Cherry coke. [*] Playing video games. [*] Canines. Shush your faces. [*] Working so he doesn't have to think. [*] His baby, Creature Comforts. [*] Cooking. [/LIST][b]Dislikes:[/b] [LIST] [*] Thunderstorms and rain. [*] Dealing with drunks at the pub. [*] People demanding he does something. [*] Being stuck indoors. [*] The catholic religion. [*] Doctors, hospitals, anything medical. [/LIST][b]Strengths:[/b] [LIST] [*] Understanding and accepting of the supernatural. [*] Knows when to back down in a situation. [*] His stubborn streak. That’s saved his life. [*] Isn’t opposed to listening to others ideas. [/LIST][b]Weaknesses:[/b] [LIST] [*] Clowns, borderline fear. [*] Eric. [*] Sometimes he forgets to look after himself. [*] Smokes when he’s stressed. That’ll kill him one day no doubt. [/LIST][b]History:[/b]

Back in the early summer of 1984, a young mum named Cheyenne gave birth to a bouncing baby boy. There wasn’t much room to celebrate though. Cheyenne had a ‘white boy’ according to her boyfriend at the time, Louis. He was Hispanic in origin; Cheyenne was only half Native American from her mother’s Hopi blood. The boy that she named Drew didn’t look like it at all; in fact he looked more like the beast that had taken her virginity in a brutal attack. Still, she didn’t hold that against her son and even though the colour of skin drove Louis away and left the small family broken, she did her best for almost two years before finally giving up and signing Drew away into the child protections services. She left no trail for Drew to pick up should he ever want to contact her, only a scribbled tribe name on a book store receipt and her cross.

Since he was too little to remember his real parents, Drew grew up in a small town house in the central business district of New Orleans. He hated it with a passion, his sister Anna made his life hell and Amanda and Nickolas his foster parents didn’t even notice, they were so wrapped up in their own respective work lives the majority of the time they barely even noticed their own biological daughter, their foster son was beyond them. It was basically a time where he brought himself up, if he fell down then he picked himself up, if he was hungry, then he made himself something to eat and avoided the family as much as possible by staying out as late as possible or locking himself away. It wasn’t like the bruises from Anna’s ‘lessons’ would have bothered his mom or his dad even if they had seen them when he was around.

By the age of thirteen, nearly fourteen, he’d more or less dropped out of school and spent a lot of his time on the streets avoiding things. He met another kid, just a little older than him called Eric and they started hanging out more and more. By the time he was sixteen, he’d developed a major crush on Eric but he was always scared that the other male would turn him away. He’d seen Eric’s parents once, and they in a roundabout way made Drew glad that he had foster parents even if he did want to deck Eric’s deadbeat dad. It was only a few weeks after getting a glimpse of what Eric’s parents were like that he finally admitted that he had feelings for Eric and got the shock of his life when Eric admitted the same thing.

They had a year together and it was great. Drew would always come up with something new for Eric and Eric would retaliate and surprise him. It was one of the happiest times in Drew’s life and not even his bitchy sister couldn’t ruin for him. Even his foster mom was a little more approachable, especially after she’d stumbled across him and Eric making out. The happiness was short lived though. Eric’s Ulfric caught them out one day along with the pack Bolverk. Ulfric Shane believed that wolves should stay with their own kind and wanted to deal with the ‘embarrassment’ that the boys had become before anyone within Eric’s pack got any bright ideas and tried something funny, so he set the evil doer on Eric to teach him a lesson.

While the wolves fought and tore into each, Drew was held back by Shane. He struggled, it was only natural, and the guy snapped Drew’s arm in two like a twig without even blinking. He was hauled away when Shane thought that he’d got what he wanted. Drew all the while thought that he’d end up as Gator bait or something worse, dinner for Shane. It was perhaps a stroke of luck that a rival pack decided to take over the territory because Shane wasn’t doing what he should’ve been doing. Drew never saw his boyfriend come mate again after that day, the only thing he remembers seeing was his Eric pinned by some shaggy Hollywood monster that smelt of wet dog.

Shane handed Drew off to the Geri and Hati, loyalists that believed in what Shane did. These pair weren’t none too gentle with the teenager either. The Geri threw Drew in the back of a car after clocking him upside the head and that was it. Bye bye Eric, bye bye New Orleans and hello Chicago. He fought against the two wolves, Julian and Warrick. If they thought that he was going to sit back and let them just walk all over him then they had another thing coming. Of course every time he resisted something that they said or did, they hurt him. After awhile it was like he became their pet, he stayed with them for almost three years before they finally let him wander around on his own. The first chance he got, Drew ran as fast as he could and didn’t stop until he collapsed and when he got up he ran some more.

Drew bounced around a lot after that, finding work when and where he could. Sure, he could’ve gone back to New Orleans and tried to find out what had happened. Instead something kept him away from his home. He tried getting a life for himself, and by the time he was twenty five he’d made his way across the pond and settled in the UK, Jackford actually. Instead of sitting on his thumb though, Drew hunted for a purpose and found a rundown family pub that was up for sale because the owner’s wife had passed on because of cancer after pouring her life into the business. Drew snapped the offer up with a promise there’d be a memorial for her. He’s made a good go at things at Creature Comforts since then and still stays somewhat under the radar. Just in case.[/SIZE]

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birdbizarre · 7 years

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the human sex talk

okay trolls listen up heres the sex talk your lusus wont give you

im going to try to keep this as basic as possible because its going to be confusing anyway so if youre human and youre reading this thinking wow davesprite why didnt you bring up x im sorry bear with me

okay

humans have two basic sexes male and female

for trolls this split isnt really significant in terms of reproduction obviously universes vary and i dont know about every troll but the sexual dimorphism between trolls is very low compared to say some of your lusii or native animals i know some universes where trolls dont have sexes at all just genders

for humans however outside of medical and scientific intervention only a male sex and female sex pair can produce a child

males of the species are born with what is called a penis this is roughly analogous to the bone bulge of a troll below the penis where a nook is on a troll are the testicles sometimes referred to as the balls

you then have the what do trolls call it waste chute or whatever thats further behind the balls

and thats all that is down there

the penis is a flesh covered muscle that normally hangs limp in front of the pelvis there is no sheath and it does not retract into the body it is usually smaller than a troll bulge so the average range is between four and six inches its generally the same width all the way usually between like an inch or two inches in diameter

the head of the penis can be slightly wider than the shaft but doesnt have to be you can usually tell where the shaft ends and the head begins because the shape is slightly different usually the skin that covers the penis will also cover the head and then there will be a sort of fold where the urethra is at the very tip

the urethra is a small hole and thats where piss and ejaculate come out but well get to that in a bit

some humans however have the fold before the head leaving the more sensitive skin around the urethra exposed this isnt the way humans are born but its pretty common so its worth mentioning you dont really want to know why so dont ask

when a male sex human gets aroused the human body directs blood into the penis muscle which then causes it to stiffen otherwise it would just be sort of floppy and useless during sex this is called getting hard or getting a boner or whatever else theres tons of nicknames for all this stuff those are just the big two

then there are the testicles or balls that i mentioned before these are about the size of a golf ball i guess im not really sure what the best troll analogue is there i guess if you imagine the size of an eyeball that is removed from someones socket its just a little bigger than that but again sometimes its different depending on the human

these are also covered in skin like the rest of the human and theyre not really important for the act of sex but they play a part in reproduction because inside is the males genetic material theyre pretty much just weird flesh sacks so its sort of boring but some humans like them being touched i dont know

lets skip over to the female sex organs so we can see how they fit together

females have the equivalent of a troll nook collectively referred to as the vagina which is composed of several parts they do not have a penis

essentially you have a hole much like a nook and around that hole are a few flaps of skin for protection i guess you cant just leave a hole uncovered its all sort of shaped like a clamshell if you turned it on its side or a sort of vertically oriented oval so the quote unquote tips of the oval are oriented toward the belly button and the waste chute respectively

at the top of the clamshell though still within the skin folds above the vaginal opening and just barely above the female urethra which is just another smaller hole with no sexual purpose is the clitoris this is the big one boys this is the doozy this is essentially the female penis or bulge except its only about as big as a pea and something like fifty thousand times more sensitive than a penis so tread carefully

unfortunately for most ladies the clitoris or clit for short isnt reproductively relevant its just sort of vestigial so while its great for pleasure it often goes neglected which sort of sounds like a shame if you ask me and probably more than half the human population

anyway

you might be wondering well if the human males have balls to hold the genetic material where is it on the female its on the inside

essentially the vagina is like a tube and at the end of the tube it narrows and theres a very small opening called the cervix which is where the vagina technically ends and past the cervix is the uterus which is like a balloon with two small deflated balloons attached on either side called the fallopian tubes and finally at the end of those deflated balloons are the ovaries and thats where the female genetic material is squirreled away like some sort of dragons hoard except the hoard is squishy little things called eggs and each egg holds all of the females genetic material

now again this is all on the inside

now lets get to the big shabang itself sex

if your planet doesnt use the word sex this is what youd call pailing and some parts of this might get sort of scandalous depending on how into pailing culture you are and if youre from alternia or beforus so im sorry if it makes you blush or makes you angry but youve been warned

sex occurs between all genders but the again the only kind of sex that has reproductive merit and can produce descendants is between someone with male sex organs and someone with female sex organs as described above

when a male becomes aroused and gets a boner he will then part the folds of the female and insert his penis into her vagina carefully because the vaginal opening is relatively small compared to the penis but fortunately its flexible and if the female is aroused it produces a lubricant sort of like pre material if everything goes well and the foreplay was good enough it shouldnt be painful though if the female hasnt done it before aka is a virgin it might take some time

from my understanding troll bulges are prehensile so pailing involves a lot of wiggling in the indoor area but human penises are not so from here it just becomes a lot of thrusting straight forward and back changing positions can change the sensation but its really pretty boring to talk about but in practice its fun because if it werent our species would die out obviously

anyway then climax happens this should be pretty self explanatory even for a troll this is when the genetic material is released

for the purposes of reproduction the female doesnt have to orgasm but if youre having sex and you think its over just because the guy came youre a monster always take care of your partner

now youre going to be thinking wait davesprite you skipped a step no i didnt

the male does not pull out of the female to release genetic material i repeat the genetic material remains inside the female this is where it belongs it might be gross and drippy but that doesnt go anywhere its not collected its not put anywhere

in human reproduction there is no bucket

the males genetic material which is called sperm or semen technically two different parts of the same liquid but people use them interchangeably goes through the cervix and into the uterus then it will go up the fallopian tubes where if the timing is right because the female reproductive system is not always ready and thats a whole other lesson i cant go into right now there will be an egg waiting

the genetic material of the male will attempt to merge with the genetic material of the female in the males ejaculate there are tons of little packets of genetic material thats the sperm i mentioned before and these little packets have tails on them which let them swim up to the egg and then attempt to break in like little horny thugs the egg will attempt to kill them so only the strongest reach the center

if one of the sperm is successful and of the millions and millions of sperm released in the semen only one usually ever makes all the way from the cervix to the egg the egg will be fertilized and then it will move down the fallopian tube and embed in the wall of the uterus

by then the sex is long over but the egg remains in the uterus for nine months longer if you dont know what a month is its basically a perigree so nine perigrees give or take a little and then a baby aka a grub comes out of the mother through the vagina

and thats human reproduction we do it ourselves because thats just the human way

thanks for listening ive been davesprite and ill take your questions now

oh wait

faq number one

yes trolls and humans can have sex because while the parts are different they can usually more or less fit together however this wont make a grub or a baby unless your universe allows it which sort of varies but usually the answer is no

faq number two

humans can do it up the waste chute which is how a lot of gay men aka male humans who like other male humans choose to do it because they dont have a vagina or nook again it is extremely rare that this makes a baby though the multiverse is a big big place

okay there you go now ill take any remaining questions

#nsfw/#ic #long post/#[[ there it is. youre welcome. i suffer for you ]]

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bkwrm523 · 7 years

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So, this was supposed to be submitted to @imaginemycroftholmes , but my desktop is being obnoxious about it. Posting it and tagging them, with permission.

Name: Sara

Age (note that if you are under the age of consent your score will be significantly lower for Marriage, Friendship and Partnership): 30

Gender: Female

Occupation: Administrative Assistant (fancy way of saying secretary)

Nationality: USA

Country of origin: USA

Personality type (Myers-Briggs Type Indicator): INFP

Education: Bachelor’s degree

Marital Status (if not applicable put N/A): Not married

Number of children (if not applicable put N/A): 0

Who would you shoot out of John, Sherlock, Mycroft and why: Mycroft. The Holmes brothers are more likely to understand if I’ve been forced into it. Sherlock tends to be a bit more emotional and unpredictable than Mycroft. Also, Sherlock’s been shot a few times, that we know of, and Mycroft hasn’t (that we know of), so I think it’s Mycroft’s turn (it said “shoot”, not kill. I have terrible aim and I’ve never used a gun; Mycroft is probably safe)

Height: 5’2 (of sass and insecurity)

Position in the family (oldest, youngest, middle): youngest, only non-firstborn in my immediate family

Best subject: Literature

Favorite Subject: Literature or History

Worst subject: Math

Last song listened to: Rag doll by Aerosmith

Favorite color: Purple

Thoughts on Molly and Sherlock’s impending relationship: If they’re finally hooking up, then I’m super happy for them!

Illness/allergies/impairments: I suspect I’m autistic, and I have anxiety and depression. They’re both usually under control.

Last sentence uttered to another living human being: Where’s the turkey?

Hair color/length: short (about chin length when I remember to get it trimmed often enough). Natural color is a very nice dark brown, but I usually dye it red. I’ve considered dying it purple, but it hasn’t been possible so far due to my job. Maybe in the future.

Who do you feel more sympathy for Sgt. Donovan or Anderson’s wife: Anderson’s wife. I’m not exactly the most informed in the situation, but Sgt. Donovan hasn’t seemed to show any remorse when she’s wronged someone, has a bizarre vendetta for Sherlock, and probably knew Anderson was married when she got involved with him (okay, I’m guessing on a lot of these). The only thing I know about Anderson’s wife, is that her husband cheated on her. Possibly my opinion would change if I knew more.

Eye color: Blue

Constantly cold, hot or prefect: Usually hot. (meaning I prefer colder temperatures, to clarify)

Seven Noteworthy skills (ex: can play an instrument, fire most guns, ride a unicycle, etc.): I’m a pretty good liar (probably not by the standards of Sherlock or Mycroft, but I can fool the average person). I’m a decent gamer (PC). I don’t speed-read, but I’m a pretty fast reader. I’m not good at coming up with positive things about myself. I’m a very good reader - I read Hamlet by myself when I was 12 just to prove that I could. Read a couple other advanced books at a young age to prove that I was good at it. I’m a writer - I don’t have much inborn talent, but I’ve worked really hard at it for as long as I remember, so I’ve learned to be very good at it. I’ve been dealing with mental issues (as listed above) by myself from a pretty young age, so I’m used to coming up with my own coping mechanisms.

Nine noticeable sins: (ex: moody, bad listener, selfish, etc.): I’m impatient. Shy I tend to be a bit selfish, but it’s a flaw I’ve been working on for years and am pretty good at stepping on those impulses these days. I’m not good at detecting subtleties in conversation; you often have to be blunt with me or I may not understand. I’m a second generation geek I’m not good at communicating it when I’m in emotional distress and need help I’m not good at keeping in touch with friends

Languages known/spoken: English, I can swear a little in Orcish

Cats, dogs, both or other: I don’t have any pets, but I’m a dog person and I’m allergic to cats.

How often you help your community (1 never, 2 sometimes when prompted, 3 average, 4 often, 5 weekly): 2

Favorite Holmes family member: … this feels like a trick question, so I’m gonna cheat and say Sherlock & Mycroft’s dad.

Body type (1 obese, 2 overweight, 3 averages, 4 fit, 5 skinny): 2

Number of past lovers (put N/A if virgin or not seeking marriage): N/A

Level of cleanliness (5 slobs, 4 messy, 3 average, 2 pretty clean and 1 spotless): 4

Would you rather piss off Sherlock or Mycroft: This is a really tough one, but I’m gonna say Mycroft. They’re both reasonable people, but I feel like Mycroft is less emotional, and therefore would be easier to reason with so I could make amends.

Rate your mental health on a scale of 1-5 with one being terrible and 5 being fine: 2.5

Rate your confidence on a scale of 1-5 with 1 being poor and 5 being Sherlock levels: 2

Combat level (1 sitting duck, 2 somewhat okay, 3 can hold their own, 4 pretty damn good, 5 a proficient fighter): 3

Circle of friends: Very very small. About five or so people I chat with on a daily basis.

Who do you side with more Sherlock or Mycroft: … I dunno. I don’t like to get in the middle; infp’s tend to loathe conflict and I’m no exception. I will say I think the Holmes clan has been epically unfair to Mycroft lately.

Level of intelligence on a scale of 1-5: I’d say a three, but I think people who know me would say I’m being modest and give me a 4. I’ll let you decide which to believe.

Who do you side with more Mycroft or Mrs. Hudson: Mrs. Hudson.

Introvert or Extrovert: Introvert.

Political alignment: In the USA’s system, I’m an independent that leans towards democrat. I’d rather decide each issue individually than tie myself to any one party. The UK’s system, I’m not sufficiently familiar with to say.

Who would your rather be trapped in a long car ride with Mummy Holmes or Holmes Senior: Mummy Holmes, I guess; she’d probably be easier to have a conversation with. I don’t think I’d mind with either of them, however.

Go to outfit for everyday: Jeans and a tshirt on my days off (tshirts I buy plain solid ones, then I buy fabric paint and stencils and put geeky stuff on them). I have work attire that’s usually black formal pants, black modest undershirt, and a button down formal shirt in some sorta color.

Go to outfit to impress: I refer you to the formal outfit above.

5 hobbies (not to be confused with noteworthy skills): Gaming (PC), creative writing, reading (fiction), sewing, watching movies

Opinion of Rosie Watson and Mary Watson: Rosie seems like a perfectly sweet and normal baby. I’m so sorry she lost her mom, though. Mary, I’m glad she was happy with John at the end, and I’m so sorry it didn’t last.

Favorite music/book/movies: Music, I really don’t feel that strongly about. I listen to heavy metal, but I wouldn’t say I have a favorite song. Books and movies it’s the opposite problem; I love too many to pick just one. However, I have a go-to answer to both questions for the purpose of conversation. Favorite book - The Hobbit. Favorite movie - Havey (to clarify, the one starring Jimmy Stewart)

How well you take rejection on a scale from 1-5: with five being the best? I’m gonna go with 4.5. Not a five because I’m not that overconfident. Yeah it may hurt, but we’ve all been there before (either being rejected or doing the rejecting, whatever), and I’m an adult. Last time I got rejected, I just said “okay”, walked away, and we remained friends for years after. It never came up again.

Religious or religious affliations: Agnostic. I try to be a live-and-let-live type, as long as the other person doesn’t harass me to try & convert me.

Kids or no (note this is wanting them not the ability to have them): I don’t have any at the moment for financial reasons, but I do want them one day.

Out of the Holmes family (Siger, Violet, Sherlock and Eurus) who would you kill, maim, kiss or roommate with and why:

Kill: Eurus. I know I’m being self centered here, and I am sorry for that, but she comes off to me as a whiney baby that couldn’t take platonic rejection and decided to punish everyone for it. Grow up. Maim: Violet, I guess. I don’t really have super strong negative feelings about anyone else, but she seems to have an attitude that Mycroft is less important than Eurus, and that irritates me. Kiss: Sherlock. I can tell him it’s for a bet and kiss him on the cheek. Also, I definitely don’t want to be his roommate; I like sleep. Roommate: Siger. Don’t know that much about him, but he seems nice.

Do you think what Mycroft did with Eurus (at the time) was justified and needed: YES. And his parents’ response to finding out about it all was, IMHO, immature and extremely rude. It’s understandable that their emotions were high in the situation, but there was absolutely no excuse for taking it out on Mycroft.

Please bold the following that you wish to have with Mr. Holmes: Friendship Partnership Marriage Mentorship

A detective who was mere days away from cracking an international oil smuggling ring has suddenly gone missing. While inspecting his last-known location, officers find a note: 710 57735 34 5508 51 7718. Currently there are 3 suspects:Bill, John, and Todd. Can you break this answer and tell me the reason. I’m gonna have to admit defeat on this one. I could google it, but I’d rather not cheat. I have no idea, sorry.

What belongs to you but others use it more than you do? Your name. Heard this one before :)

Dwayne Johnson was running away with the loot from a heist in his car along with Vin Diesel. One tire was punctured and he dropped down to replace it. While changing the wheel, he dropped the four nuts that were holding the wheel and they fell into a drain. Vin Diesel gave him an idea using which they were able to drive till the rendezvous point. Take his loot and get into Vin Diesel’s car. There’s no reason I can think of why they can’t share a car. Unless you can space out the remaining nuts on the tire to hold the tire onto the car; probably wouldn’t be good enough for very long, but should be good enough to get them to the rendezvous point, or far enough to ditch the car somewhere safe. Whichever.

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tryhardbitch · 7 years

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Literary Fiction Based on “Same Old Love” by Selena Gomez

She is there for me but not in the way I want her to be, and it’s hard to say “I know you’re there for me but can you be there for me in this way.” I understand that it is nice of her to understand that i need my space and be sad on my behalf because I’ve had a bad day but can she ask about it or something? Can she change our plans slightly to do something nice for me when I’m sad? I love her but why can’t she love me slightly differently. Believe me when I tell you I am not proud of this emotion.

I don’t respond to her very thoughtful text in which she is very okay about my ditching our plans to meet her parents tonight. I watch the branches sway in the breeze outside my window, I think about how many poems use the term “bough” and if that term has ever been used outside of a poem. I think there must be thousands of poems that use the word “bough” and miss the entire point about trees. I think about this because she writes poems about her childhood, about how her dad left her or something. I don’t know if they’re good or not. I only like poems by Sappho. If your poem doesn’t reference virgins with ribbons tied in their hair on a mountainside in Cyprus, where the air smells of olives and every tree is worth climbing, then I think your poem is stupid.

I think I’ll smoke some weed and leave thinking about replying to her until later. I think about five minutes in the future, when I will be in my bed in my underwear and new bra, staring at the branches swaying, but with less thoughts this time.

I imagine I won’t reply at all for the entire night and I will sit motionless in front of the fan with the air conditioning cooler than usual, and that it will be beautiful. I imagine that she will break up with me for saying no to her. I imagine some Egyptian god exists somewhere who’s sole purpose is to punish me for saying “no” to people’s plans. I know another god exists, probably a Norse one, that exists to punish me for these unbelievably selfish thoughts. I am unbelievably selfish. Everybody is but at least some people are better at hiding it than I am, or better at just accepting it than I am.

My last girlfriend before her cheated on me one night because I didn’t go out with her, and instead took a xanax and watched X-Files.

I have a lot of problems, believe me, the kind of problems people get published in the New Yorker for writing stories about. My mother has ALS, which women don’t usually get, and can’t talk on the phone anymore, and I really ought to move back home to take care of her. My dad remarried someone named Sarita who is 15 years younger than him, he has a new kid named Lumiere who, I shit you not, is named after the candelabra from Beauty and the Beast. My dad opened a credit card in my name and then maxed it out, promised he would paid it back, and then didn’t, so my credit has gone to shit and nobody will rent an apartment to me so I live in a shithole above a Crown’s Fried Chicken with a dude named Joe who says he deals coke but I think that means he just does a lot of it in our living room with “clients.” I work very hard but don’t get paid very much money and i don’t see that ever changing. I consider becoming a stripper more and more everyday. I have a bump on my finger that, according to the internet and my nurse-friend Chris, is probably a harmful blood clot but I don’t even know what doctor I call about that or if I just solo amputate it or what.

I have real problems, but I don’t think about them, I just want my girlfriend to love me the right way. I want to complain outloud about small things like the wording of text messages or how she never calls me even though we’ve been dating a year and I’m not sure if she should tell me she loves me, or how people say “I love you” because the only people who said they loved me was the girl who cheated on me and this guy named Steve, who were both drunk and trying to get me to do something for them at the time.

I just googled “when do people say I love you” and it said on average men say it in 88 days and women say it in 139 days. It has been 474.5 days. Where do people say I love you? While fighting? While super-duper in love? After or before sex? Do you have to be on a mountaintop? I would like it if that was required. I don’t even know if I love her, because I try to avoid thinking about this. I wish I could take a test to tell me if I love her, because I’m an American, and we’re used to tests telling us what to do.

I googled “am I in love” and opened a quiz, got to question 3 on “IF YOUR CRUSH TEXTED YOU RIGHT NOW, WHAT WOULD IT PROBABLY BE ABOUT?” and now I feel ill so I close the computer.

I wish I thought the right things at the right times.

#selena gomez #same old love #spilled ink

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letsimportanttreecollection-blog · 6 years

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colorado insurance adjuster jobs

"colorado insurance adjuster jobs

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i'm 17 and i'm looking to purchase my first motorbike so i was wondering if you could give me some bike for less than about 2000 with cheap insurance?, but no rubbish Chinese bike because they fall apart""

How can I get free health insurance?

My husband and I can't afford health insurance. Is there a way to get it for free? We live in southern California.

Motorcycle Finance Rates??

Can anyone tell me what a good rate on a motorcycle loan would be? I am thinking about buying a new Yamaha motorcycle and it looks like the best rate they can do is about 9% which seems a little high? I still hear about people getting car loans for about 5%, are motorcycle loans usually higher for some reason? I think a signature loan from the bank might be a better way to go because I think I might be able to get a better rate plus I wouldn't have to have full coverage insurance.""

Best car and insurance for 18 year old?

Hey, just looking for some advice for the cheapest possible way to get a car and insurance (not necessarily together) for less than 4,000 a year? I knows there's schemes like Young Marmalade, but I'd rather know what's going to happen with my insurance after the 1st year, but at the moment they do seem like the best option. Any help appreciated! :-)""

How much would car insurance would cost for a 16 year old?

Okay so i need to know how much would the insurence about be for a 16 year old driving a 2005 Mazda Rx-8 4 door coupe manual? Please help

""Confused about car insurance...stacked, unstacked??

i am looking up car insurance quotes online and for Uninsured Motorists Bodily Injury Option there is a stacked option and a unstacked option. Does anyone know what this means? What the diff is? This is for PA

16 Year Old Auto Insurance on Own Car?

hey, i am currently 16 and have had my license for about 5 months now, i am considering buying my own car, can anyone tell me an estimate of how much my insurance would be? i would be buying an older model car (1997-2002), i completed a young drivers course. Thanks""

""Car insurance sent me SR-1 form, What to do on SR-1?""

I got into a solo or at-fault accident cause i skidded off the road due to the road being wet after the heavy downpour. Nothing major and my first ever accident so i decided to report it to the insurance for a claim but decided to disregard the claim since nothing needed to be repaired except an alignment because i work on cars so nothing seemed broken. Now that it's been disregarded, mercury insurance sent me an sr-1 form stating i must fill it out or my license will be suspended within 10 days. If i fill it out and since there was no damages over $750, will there be an inspection to my vehicle?""

Will this effect my car insurance?

I got pulled over and ticketed for an outdated inspection sticker and a light being out. I've been ticketed before, but the ticket was thrown out in court. I was wondering if this will effect my car insurance at all. I live in Massachusetts. I think it counts as a moving violation but i think they let you off on your first offence.""

Boyfriend got into accident with my car..he has insurance/SR-22. Whose insurance will be responsible?

My boyfriend has had an insurance policy with an SR-22 on it for almost a year. It expires in 6 days. He was driving my car to work and got into an accident that was his fault. My car has barely any damage and I don't think the other car was severely damaged. My mom has an insurance policy on my car ( I live with her) But since my boyfriend was driving and he has insurance with the SR-22 doesn't that mean that it will go on his insurance? Isn't that the exact reason he had to have the SR-22 in the first place? So in case he screwed up (which he did) than it would be covered in any car he drives? Thanks.

Would insurance company likely settle for 15K?

Auto accident....my lawyer asking for 25K, insurance company said 12K (my lawyer wants to go to court and all that, I really do not want to; I just want to get this over with) My lawyer said it's worth much more than 25K but that's all the limit is. If I ask the lawyer to try & negotiate 15K w/o going to court; how likely or unlikely that the insurance company (State Farm) agree? If they do agree, how long before they send the check? I need to pay my doctor bills off and get another car (I am so ready for this to be over with!!!!) Thanks.""

Can you sue an Insurance company...?

If the policy holder's maximum coverage, has been reached..... For example, if someone died as a result of an accident. The other driver was at fault but has not assets, can the family of the victim sue the Insurance Company of the other driver, for more than their max coverage. Like a wrongful death lawsuit for 1million dollars, is the insurance company still liable?""

Health care insurance?

My husband is on SSI and gets a weekly workers comp check? His income is non taxable . We did not qualify through the affordable marketplace for insurance for myself and son and did not qualify in Indiana for CHIPS for our child? We had been perviously purchasing our own private insurance but now I see you can't even do this anymore our current plan runs out in March of 2014 , and all thay offer now is temporary health care plans. Anyone out there finding them-self in this situation? Any advice ? Thanks?""

WHATS THE CHEAPEST CAR INSURANCE?

I AM TRYING TO GET A QUOTE FOR MY CAR INSURANCE AND THERE ALL LIKE 1000-2000. ITS A SKODA OCTAVIA 1.9 ELEGANCE PD 2006 ESTATE IVE TRIED WEBSITES LIKE GO COMPARE, COMPARE THE MARKET, CONFUSED.COM, DIRECTLINE.COM, LLOYDS TSB ECT ECT. ANY IDEAS WOULD BE MUCH APPRECIATED?""

Pregnant: no insurance?

i just found out that i'm pregnant. it was a surprise. i don't have insurance. what can i do? i am over qualified for medicaid, barely. my husband is a police officer. to give birth at the hospital it will cost $7180. i called maternity card but they are very expensive and my doctor already said he doesn't deal with them. does anyone have any solutions? i really need an answer. thanks!""

What can I get for medical insurance?

Im 26 and collecting unemployment. I currently have no medical insurance. What can I get for medical until I get another job?

Who has the cheapest car insurance?

CAR INSURANCE question?

Ive just been made a fiance manager at work and my car insurance has gone down in price ! Can anybody tell me what kind of jobs make your car insurance reduced in price and why ?

Any idea how much insurance is on a slightly new mustang for a 16 year old?

pretty much said it all but maybe a 2000-2005 mustang.. idk how much insurance would be since its his first car.. thanks

Need advice on getting speeding ticket reduced?

I got a ticket for 50 mph in a 35 mph. The officer reduced the ticket from 55 mph to 50 mph and advised me to plead not guilty and show up in court. He said he would be there and ...show more

Are you required to first get an estimate from your insurance for car repairs?

I recently got into a car accident and I'm trying to get repairs done. Do I have to get an estimate of damages from my insurance company first or should I go ahead and get estimates from an auto shop? I've heard that if you get your car estimated by the insurance company first, they tend to overlook problems and try to write you a quick check and normally won't give you more money if more damages are found by the repair shops. But I don't know if I'm supposed to get my own estimates first? What should I do? Thanks!!""

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Car insurance!?

I have recently bought a new car but im 21 years old. the car is in my name but i want the main driver to be my dad and then me as an additional driver. is there any cheap insurance companies that will allow that. or has any1 aged 21 that has been driving for 2.5years got cheap insurance thanks

""Car insurance, accident & medical bills?""

I was in a car accident a month and a half ago. I went through my insurance to get my car fixed. My insurance dealt with his insurance & they accepted full responsibility. I went to the hospital immediately after the accident because I was afraid I had a concussion. I had mentioned to my ins company that I went to the hospital & asked what to do with my ambulance bill. I was told that wasn't covered under my insurance & his insurance would need to contact me. The ambulance company asked for my car insurance info & I have not received a bill, so I'm assuming my insurance company took care of it. However, I now have copays for physical therapy for my neck & back. How does this work? Do I need to contact his insurance or will his insurance be contacting me? I assumed I would hear from them, so I'm a bit confused by the process.""

How to get car insurance as a self dependent college student in CA?

I need to look for cheap car insurance asap, I am a resident of Callifornia, I will get my drivers licence the 20th of this month and I need the car insurance before the 24th. I figure I have exactly one day and a half to do it so I can finish my car registration before the 24th , when the past registration is due, please help me !""

Quick question about RENTERS INSURANCE?

My fiance and i are renting out a house starting Feb. 1st. After a year we have an option to buy the house. Anyways, when we were looking at the house she said her dad wants us to get renters insurance before we move in. I'm guessing because of the fireplace, attic, etc. Do i need to get any info from her before i sign up for insurance? Where do i go to get this? ANY sort of info would be great. We're new to renters insurance. We live in an apartment complex right now with NO insurance.""

Does anyone know how much does car insurance cost for underage Drivers?????

Im applying for my permit and im 17 years old. the only thing im missing is my insurance. Please help i asked all my friends but none have insurance. Thank you for your time, Diana****""

How to get out of a ticket? I did not have insurance card?

Basically, I was pulled over for talking on a cell phone. I'm not going to fight that in court but I had an expired insurance card which i also got a ticket for. I had been warned months prior by another officer who pulled me over, to get one that isn't expired. That cop let me go I did get one, but left it at my house when pulled over last night. Do I have a chance to fight this off? I really don't feel like paying 180$""

Have you ever heard of a Car Insurance doing this?

Have you ever heard of this before: I know a person who has car insurance with Allstate and they claim the following reason for jacking up their prices every 6 months when you pay the bill for the next 6 months. The Reasons from them are: 1-Because since you have allstate and when anyone else that has allstate also in your area has an accident where them and someone else is involved this will make your payment go up. 2-All insurance companies do this also where if anyone not involved in an accident say at home and someone else with the same insurance company as you have, if they have an accident even if your at home when this happens your payments will go up. My Father has had direct for i don't know how long but a long time and every time someone has a wreck that has direct and he is not involved in it he still pays the same amount he did last time before the other direct insurance people have a wreck. Please also provide the name of your insurance company as I want to make a chart of how many people answered and what insurance company they currently have or had. Thank you I'd greatly appreciate the insurance info that's all I would like for the chart not your name.""

Are we going to have to have a secondary health insurance to insure against the newly sky-high deductibles?

I'm looking for free car insurance quotes?

As I'm a new driver, my parents told me to seek on the internet for insurances quotes, to help me handle my own things. So yeah i'm looking for websites that offer free car insurances quotes.""

Affordable car insurance for teen drivers?

I am currently 17 and I will have my license for a year on April 28th. I had one minor accident in October but I finally found a car that I can afford payments on that is a really nice car but all the insurance companies are giving me rates over $200 that I can't afford because I don't have the money to pay that and a car payment. Is there anyway I can get the car and get low insurance rates?

How much does car insurance lower when you turn 21?

I have insurance with Farm Bureau, and I have a completely clean record. I hear insurance lowers when you turn 21, anyone know about how much? I pay about 600 a quarter..""

How much is my car insurance ? 07 Camry 20 years of age southern California what would be the car insurance ?

What is the cheapest car insurance company for a first time driver?

I'm trying to find the cheapest insurance for a first time driver (just got my G2 and I'm 18) in Mississauga or the GTA basically. I'm probably not getting a new car so something from like 2003 (maybe a 2002 beetle).

Which has cheaper car insurance florida or rhode island?

which state on average has lower rates? new york which is my current state is a much higher rate than these two but im not sure which is lower out of the two.

How much would a car insurance cost?

I am living in NYC and I'm almost 21 and im planning to get a car pretty soon and by that time i will be 21 but i just got my drivers license. And the car i'll be getting will probably be a 2006 honda civic. So, how much would a car insurance cost me per month? Your help will be appreciated thanks :)""

How much is car insurance for teens ?

I live in California

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Hello, I need to get my group 1 insurance license to sell annuities in the state of Texas. I am honestly not sure where to go or what to do. What do I need to do? Thank you.""

Does anyone know an insurance plan for health and dental?

I am in need of health insurance and dental and i a in between jobs does anyone out there know a decent affordable insurance company that offers help to people like me thank you in advance

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The insurance cost of a year 2012 Audi Q5 2.0?

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Hi, I have heard that in U.S. getting health insurance and your vehicle insurance is mandatory and not your option/choice. Is that true? If yes, what is the rationale behind government enforcing this on citizens? Thanks

Car insurance?

is there such a thing as shared car insurace, kinda like family health insurance?( like 1 insurance bill 4 2 cars)""

Car Insurance need advice?

I have one car with 24 years no claims and am going to be the policy holder for my sons car. Can i put down that i have 24 years no claims or do i have to start again (in the sense put 0 down??)Im quite confused by the process as i haven't had to do this before, also it is very difficult for him to afford insurance if we don't do it this way so if anyone knows of any good cheap insurance companies""

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Nissan GTR Lease & Insurance Cost?

Approximately, how much is Nissan GTR lease and insurance cost? Thanks.""

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https://www.linkedin.com/pulse/i-am-curious-wondering-how-expensive-earthquake-insurance-carter-cole/"

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qohesive-blog · 7 years

Text

so we’ve got some catching up to do - obligatory college reflection // 170712

Not. Letting. This. One. Slide.

Yes, I am aware that it’s been almost exactly a year since my last post here, and I’ve got no one but myself to blame. It’s not because omg, college kept me so busy (it was), it’s not because I deleted tumblr from my phone (because I can still go on desktop), it’s not because I was so happy and satisfied with my life that I don’t need a creative outlet anymore (couldn’t be further from the truth; if anything, I need to write now more than ever); in fact, I’ve probably lost count of how many times I lied cozy in my bed, no plans on a Friday night, thinking to myself hm it’s literally been 6 months since I’ve written something even though I made a huge deal about writing consistently. oh well, can’t be bothered and then gone to watch yet another episode of Jane the Virgin. Unlike most things in my life, I won’t spend time here trying to overanalyze the specific reasons why it’s so dang hard for me to commit to writing, if there are any subconscious fears or personality traits that drive this. All I can say is that I’m exceedingly thankful for the people who God have gifted with the power of words that inspire one to move, and that I am a lazy ‘lil pooper, and that I will continue to fight the good fight. Moving on, let’s get straight into business:

Obligatory First Year College Reflection

So school officially ended over two months ago, and needless to say, I’ve been given plenty of time to reflect on my first two semesters of college. Gosh, where do I start….

The Good

I’ve had the opportunity to meet a handful of kind, genuine people who made my day brighter whenever I saw them, as well as a handful of hilarious people who make me laugh, understand my humor, make me feel comfortable, and who I just generally “click” with. And it’s been really hard for me to find those sort of people in college.

(Angela, Claire, Tracy: in a place where I felt like I had to constantly put on at least some kind of act, you guys let me feel like myself. Thank you.)

HSM!! Composed primarily out of all the freshman people who met at AAIV. I’m thankful I was able to connect with a good group of Asian Christians who I know can support me and who I can support as well. I love you guys!

The opportunity to get closer to Hannah and Jon! I first met Hannah at winter retreat like 4 years back, but we haven’t really talked until we were paired for STM last summer. Being able to see her every week and grabbing the occasional meal together has honestly been such a blessing this year. She’s a brilliant, hilarious, beautiful sister in Christ and I’m really really thankful she’s here at OSU. For Jon, we got closer senior year of high school, but this year we were able to actually hang out more since he’s more involved in the asian community. He’s probably the guy friend that I have the most fun with just because whenever we’re around each other we both get super goofy and it’s just a nice, refreshing breath of air from all the other stress in my life when I’m able to be around someone who I don’t have to pretend to be someone I’m not. Through both Jon and Hannah, I’ve been able to have some pretty meaningful conversations about faith that made me reflect about my life when I otherwise would have just went with the flow of school and work.

A satisfactory relationship with my roommate. Natalie and I…..we’re not best friends, but we also don’t hate each other’s guts like most roommate horror stories I hear about. Sure, it was awkward at first because we didn’t really talk that much outside of typical pleasantries, but after a while I started to realize that it was simply her personality: Natalie is, like me at the core, introverted, a minimalist but efficient conversationalist, and one who doesn’t usually initiate conversation. And although it’s a bummer that I’m not coming out of my first year of college, locked arm-in-arm with my newfound soulmate and a binding roommate for the next three years, I appreciated the pocket of peace and quiet that Natalie offered me whenever I came back to the room, exhausted from networking events and club meetings and talking to people I didn’t want to talk to, to some much appreciated solace. Nevertheless, throughout our time together I was slowly able to see some of Natalie’s hidden quirks that she conceals underneath a seemingly stoic exterior; she spends her Friday nights baking cookies for us, she refers to herself as a “free bird”, she blasts country music in the shower and sings along with it when she doesn’t know that I came home early.

Expanding my circle of people I usually interact with. All throughout high school, I’ve mainly just kept to my comfortable Asian community. Not that there was ever anything wrong with that, and not that I’ve completely changed from that, but I just wanted to put myself in situations in which I wasn’t used to, just because I think it’s important for me to do so since I literally can’t socialize with non asians lol.

(Jon, Natalie, Alex, Jess, Erin, Truman, Tyeal, Gitu, Emma, Shiyuan, Ros, Joling, Dillon, Johann: you guys really didn’t have to keep talking to me. I know I’m super awkward, weird, and just generally not the typical person you’d hang out with, but you guys tolerated me at the least and made your way into my life at the most. Thank you for talking about your favorite books with me, and letting me show you my favorite youtube videos. Thank you for acting disappointed when I said I was going to go up to my room at because my shift ended an hour ago and I wanna sleep, dangit, and then being genuinely excited to see me reluctantly agree to stay a little longer. Thank you for showing me your collection of sketches when I showed you my own, and then drawing your own sketch of me for me to keep. Thank you for stopping at my room, knocking frantically at my door at 2am to freak out over relationship drama, and even though I may have answered the door all grumpy, mouth set in a scowl because I had an 8am the next morning, secretly I was relieved that I had been able to reach that level of closeness with a new friend.)

Really good grades!!!! Like, realllyyyy good, like I got all A’s!!!!!!! I’m actually pretty excited about this one, since in high school each semester was usually tainted by one bad grade. To be fair, first year business students don’t exactly have the most difficult of schedules, but I’m gonna choose optimism over cynicism this time and take the opportunity to feel proud of myself. I maintained a pretty good work ethic throughout the two semesters, and the best part of it? I think I’m falling in love with learning again. Seriously, I’m excited to learn. High school was different; in high school, I got the A not because I learned the material well, but because all I had in mind were collegescollegescolleges. Now that pressure is off- I’m at a mediocre state school with a lot less competition and a lot less toxicity, and that’s really given me the chance to reexamine my relationship with education and place it under a whole new light. It helps that most of my professors were pretty amazing (Writing for Engineers and Anthropology professors come to mind) and the courses I choose got me absolutely PUMPED to get to class (Chinese Film, Korean). Of course, perhaps I’m speaking too early and I’ll actually find myself hating school once again when I’m drowning under accounting and statistics next year, but I’ll enjoy the feeling while it lasts…..

Tried new things. This year, I joined a J2K group that was doing Seventeen’s Aju nice. The last time I performed dance was in 3rd grade during my fleeting one year relationship with ballet. I’m not a horrible dancer by any means, but I’m also far from the best; in fact, I’d probably place myself slightly below average. Nevertheless, I’m pretty proud that I was able to try out this new experience, and all the hours we put in each week practicing never felt like work; it was always a fun time dancing with the other people on my team and learning how to make our moves look better. Spring semester, I also joined a fraternity. Phi Chi Theta is a professional business fraternity, but it was still something that was way out of my comfort zone. I unfortunately did not realize this fact until a few months after I joined since I jumped into it rather impulsively, but I have too much pride in me to drop it (and I also already paid $150 for two semesters). I don’t want to shy away from this just because I’m not comfortable, though. Most of the people here in PCT are really different than me. They party, drink, make jokes that I’m not used to, and are just a group that I would not have associated with if it not had been for a) a few of my friends in PCT who told me it was a good group b) my pride c) the stinging rejection of not making it past the final round of BUCC interviews (a topic for a later date) d) my pride e) my pride (sensing a pattern here? once again, a topic for a later date). Given the second chance, I honestly would not have chosen to rush PCT again, but….I’m here. And even though most of the people here are intimidating, there’s also a few handful of people that I’m curious to get to know a little better, so for the time being I have to work with what I got.

There’s probably a lot of other good stuff that have happened, but for the sake of cutting this short, I’m gonna move on. Hopefully I can revisit this topic later!

The Bad

Social anxiety. Not actual, diagnosed social anxiety, but…I don’t know. Looking back at it all, I was very, very, very naive when I applied to colleges. I thought just because I enjoyed talking among my little bubble of friends back home meant that I was a social butterfly and thus suited for business. WRONG. I’m not a social butterfly, as I quickly learned within my few first months here. Maybe I’m just really good at hiding it or something because literally the amount of people who have been shocked when I say I’m an introvert….(which is actually extremely disturbing to me lol because I’m like the biggest insecure introvert in the entire world what the heck) I hate talking, people make me nervous, I constantly recite conversations in my head before I say them, I freak out over me messing up on a word which makes me mess up even more, I hate frat parties, I hate it when I have to leave my room, I just hate hate hate hate social interaction I DON’T LIKE IT. It scares me and I can literally feel my skin crawl thinking about how awkward I am. The thing is, none of these fears really came to light until this year; I, at one point, even questioned if I were an extrovert back in high school. You know what, though? It was because home was familiar. Jerome friends were people who I literally spent 4+ years growing up with. Church friends, some twice as long, even longer. I was “social” because I was comfortable, and I also thrived within the subcultures that I was familiar with. But coming here? Everything is different. I’m not in the Dublin bubble anymore, I can’t make the same jokes around my asian friends as I do around other people. This literally broke me lol I had an identity crisis. I stopped speaking up, I feel constantly self conscious about everything, my face turns red when I’m the slightest bit embarrassed (I’ve never had that happen to me before), and I stutter when I talk. But even with these things, I look pretty much normal from an external point of view; I don’t think people think this way about me when they first meet me as much as I do. I feel like these things are so big just because I’m hyperaware of everything but I’m scared that if given enough time, they will become so big that other people start to notice too. I’m actually mildly bitter towards high school and Jerome because I was so sheltered there; people have told me Jerome was weird but this is the first time I’m actually understanding the meaning of that lol. Jerome is weird, we don’t socialize with people the way you typically socialize with people in college, and I really should be more than mildly bitter at both the environment I grew up in and myself for not being more proactive, but at the same time, I’m not sure if I would change it. Weird. Need more time to think about this.

Slightly related, a crippling anxiety that business may not be the right path for me. Yeah, so I hate talking to people and speaking up. Literally the opposite of business. A part of me wonders if me taking AP Chemistry freshman year at Jerome was a contributing factor in me not wanting to pursue science. A big part of me wants to say yes. I wasn’t bad at Chem or Bio, not bad at all, but the pressure of forcing myself to take an AP class as a freshman really ruined learning science for me and left a bad taste in my mouth at the mention of science ever since then. Now, I realize that I really wasn’t horrible at those subjects and am familiar with a more efficient way to learn and I can’t help but feel that my personality is more suited for science, maybe biology or something? I value school and I value education and genuity and kindness and I’ve met some business students who don’t really meet that. Of course, I’m sure there are business majors who are the most amazing people you could meet, but I can firmly, 300% say that I’ve statistically clicked better with non-business majors. Once again, though, I’m too stubborn to drop this, and part of me is hoping that things will get better when my classes get smaller and I get to know Fisher students a little better. Fingers crossed.

I don’t really feel connected to church. I wanted to take both semesters off from 4c and try out some other churches in Columbus for the sake of expanding my comfort circle, and because I really needed a break (once again, a topic for a later time). Well, I didn’t exactly do just that. Whether it’s because I did so out of guilt or out of my own free will, I still went to 4c. Not every week, but enough that I didn’t really fully immerse myself in a different church for the duration of last year. As a result, I was neither fully committed to 4c nor other churches. I’ve given it some thought though, and though I’m a bit disappointing that I didn’t get to spend as much time with the Veritas congregation as I wanted to, I think I should still stick to 4c for now. There’s resignations that I have about 4c, but at the end of the day, it’s my home church, and I feel like I should stay and take time to build its community.

The Things Yet to Come

Of course, it would suck to end on such a depressing note. here’s a few of the things to come in the future, some potentially good, some potentially bad; I hate having my expectations crushed so I like to keep future thoughts mostly ambivalent.

I’m gonna be a membership chair for KSA next year! Equally mixed feeling about this. Considering my earlier rant about ihatetalkingithinki’mawkwardnoonewantstotalktome, and considering family heads are basically the forefront of internal communications with the club, I’m extremely, extremely nervous. Thomas and Lisa know what they’re doing though, and they’ve done a good job so far about getting all of us to help prepare the basic details for next year. I just really, really don’t want to disappoint them and I don’t want the disappoint the rest of the e-board who picked me to be one of the four family heads out of all the rest of everyone to apply. KSA is a really cool organization, and I’d love for me to be able to personally get to know a small portion of its members, and I really, really hope my anxiety doesn’t get in the way. I’ve got a few things prepared to hopefully make the experience memorable for my future family: I got a new camera that I’m planning on vlogging with whenever we go on outings, I ordered a bunch of stationary so I can write cute birthday notes to people, and I wanna make a survey to hand out to everyone at the first meeting to gauge everyone’s expectations and get to know them on a basic level (aka taking a picture of everyone’s faces and memorizing them because I’m horrible with names). I’m praying that I won’t be too awkward to my family next semester

asl;dfjalkj ROOMING WITH HSM GIRLS AHHHHHHHH I’m so excited for this yes yes yes!!! Meeting new people has been quite the experience last year but I’ve been absolutely hyped for the opportunity to finally be able to be on the same floor as the ladies who I feel most comfortable with !!! I’ll be rooming with maddie, Claire with Hannah, and then Jesse with a random roommate and we’ll all be in one square. I myself have spent the past month pinning and buying home decor for me and maddie’s room (at the expense of my poor wallet) and last week I made this really sweet flower pressed picture frame! This is the first time I’ve actually been this involved with home decor lol; my room has always been a hideous amalgram of clippings, notebooks, trinkets, just everything that I’m too afraid to throw away. Planning for next year’s room has really changed me lol. I’m even thinking of going back and reorganizing my shelf (!!!) once I get home to make my room look more ~minimalistic~ lol.

New freshmennnnnnnnn hehehehe I’m actually kind of eager to see the new freshmen that are gonna be on campus next year. Pretty stoked that Hannah and Jenna will still be here; hopefully I’ll use this opportunity to get closer to them! It’ll be nice finally graduating from the #new2osu rank hahahaha.

Classes! This one is also kind of mixed lol. I’m really looking forward to Korean, I’ve been practicing over the summer and kind of miss seeing my classmates every day. Accounting and Stats I’m absolutely terrified for since I’ve never been good with numbers, but after the events of last year I’m filled with a determination I’ve never felt before to tackle tough academics and maybe turn them into my strengths???? For what it’s worth, I bought a bunch of new notebooks from IKEA and new highlighters and that always motivates me to take real good notes.

So there’s probably a million things that I’m missing, but I’ve been sitting here typing for the good majority of 3 hours and my fingers feel kind of funny hahaha. I got the basic stuff for the most part, and it feels really really satisfying to have finally been able to lay something down on this blog after a year hiatus. There’s definitely topics that I still wanna write about, so here’s to the continued battle against inertia and an ever inspired heart!

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