#How Do I Know If My Ex Boyfriend Wants To Get Back Together Fabulous Cool Tips

[yelenayena]

Chemistry

Pairing: Pieck Finger x fem!reader

Genre: Romance

Warning: None (YAY✨), modern AU

Fun fact: Nanaba is an ex-girlfriend of Miche

Summary: You have an affair with Pieck, while she has an on-off relationship with Porco. You feel so jealous when she came to Colt’s party with him. Even so, you can't let them ruin your mood, and Thank God It's Friday, everything is possible when you are at the party on Friday night 🌚 ✨

A/N: I am a PokkoPiku shipper, but I also like her as a lesbian, but I don't like PikuLena ship bc Yelena is ours 😔 so that's why I made this story, I hope you like it 💜✨ I’m sorry if my writing is bad, still learning to write a story in English

Pieck looked at the picture that you sent on iMessage. She closed the app when Porco got behind the wheel. He turned his head and winked at Pieck who sat next to him on the passenger seat. He turned the engine on and he drove to Colt’s place.

“Let’s go, beauty,” said Porco, he opened the door for Pieck as they arrived at Colt’s place. “We're gonna have fun tonight,” he continued.

Pieck didn't reply but gave him a little smile. They both come inside, the house already crowded with people who joined the party. Porco held Pieck’s hand, he brought Pieck to their friends and joined them.

You saw them just come in, and your heart was pounding immediately. You felt jealous in your heart as you saw her in his arms and smiled at him. You rolled your eyes and tried to ignore that shitty couple. You smiled when you heard Connie’s silly stories, but deep inside your head, you can't get rid of Pieck’s face in your mind. You thought she wouldn't come with Porco, but maybe she had been together with him again. You felt sick of their on-off relationship.

You and Pieck were just friends. You have known her since the first year in college, as you both entered the same club in the university, Archery Club. She already had an on-off relationship with Porco at that time, but she knew you like girls, and she wanted to test her sexual orientation. So she often texted and called you whenever she needed someone to talk to until you both found chemistry. Sometimes you wish she would end her relationship with Porco and start dating you, but every time you think you're gonna get her, she‘s back to him instead.

You wish you could hate her, but you like her so much, Pieck is the woman you've always dreamed of. She’s beautiful, warm, and kind, and she has a very beautiful smile. The moments when you spent with her are the magical ones. You are just her secret affair, but you can't ignore her every time she needs you.

You let out a long sigh. Tonight is Colt’s party, you think that you should've had fun. Don't let your negative thoughts affect your mood here. You saw everyone you know has come to this party.

Everybody seems so fabulous, and they look so happy dancing or chit-chatting with their partner. It was so pitiful you just drink alone, even Oluo is dancing with Petra now. And, ugh! You just saw Pieck kissing Porco, you glanced away quickly and searched for something entertaining like watching Sasha’s silly dance with Niccolo. You gulped your beer and chuckled watching them.

“They're a hilarious couple, but they seemed to have each other. I mean, the girl likes to eat, the boy likes to cook. What's better than that? They really match as a couple.”

Someone talked to you. You turned your head, there's a small and tall blonde smiling at you. Your eyes narrowed, trying to see if you recognize the figure standing in front of you.

“They're one of my fave couples in this world,” you replied, ignoring the fact that you don't know her. It's a party, after all, you can talk to anybody if you want, even to strangers.

She smiled, “oh, I'm Nanaba by the way.”

“I’m-” before you can finish your words, she interrupted you.

“I know you, you're Y/N.”

You stared at her in confusion, “how did you-”

“Hange. We're both friends. Before I came here, she knew that I was keeping an eye on you, so she challenged me if I dared to greet you. I'm sorry, I didn't mean to make you uncomfortable.”

“No, don't worry, being alone sucks. I was like a kitten who got lost in this crowd.”

“Not true, you looked so cute when you were alone.”

You smiled when you heard her teased you. “So, how did you know Hange?”

And your conversation continued with her story about how she can be friends with Hange, Levi, and Miche. She’s a fourth-year student, just like Levi, Hange, and Miche, in the Culinary Science program, in a different university as you, but she's a friend of Hange and friends and a senior of Eren and friends in high school.

You think that she's cool, she looks calm, but when she talks, you know that she’s pretty funny and has a good personality. She has an average build for her height, maybe around five feet seven inches. She had blue eyes and short blonde hair, which was parted slightly to the right with short bangs and an undercut. Her appearance was very good. She looks like an androgynous supermodel.

She touched your arm to protect you from the others who went crazy and wild while they were dancing around you. At that moment, you and she looked at each other. She gave you a beautiful smile, you feel better now when she's around you. And it makes you feel that you want to know more about her.

“Do you know her? I think she keeps glancing this way,” said Nanaba while you both laughed after she told you about the silly story of Miche in high school.

“Who?” you asked.

“That girl over there, the one who wore a yellow blouse and was embraced by her boyfriend. Her face looked jealous. Eww, She has a boyfriend, but she keeps glancing at others, I feel sorry for her boyfriend,” she explained.

You know who it is, what she meant was Pieck. Pieck was indeed staring at you, but when you glanced at her, she glanced away immediately. “Just ignore her,” you said.

Nanaba looked nonchalant then she continued her hilarious stories about her and her friends. You both acted like you were old friends. She can make you forget your sadness. You two look like you enjoyed having the time together at the party.

The longer you talked, the closer she got to you until her arms touched yours. You guys were so captivated by this magical moment that you didn't even realize her bodies were closing in. You reached your consciousness when someone grabbed your hand.

It was Pieck who held your hand. “We need to talk, ” she said.

“For what?” you asked.

“Please, I'm begging you,” she pleaded.

“But-”

“It’s okay,” said Nanaba. “Go ahead and talk to her.”

You sighed then followed Pieck from behind. You turned your head back and looked at Nanaba. You moved your lips to give her a sign to wait for you there. She nodded and smiled at you.

Pieck brought you to the powder room. She placed your body on the sink and kissed your lips. “C’mon, ” she said when she stopped. She looked at you, “touch me like the way you used to,” she said before she continued to kiss you.

She always knows how to turn you on. This is how she got you wrapped around her, but you also enjoyed it and she tasted so good. You pulled her body and placed her on the sink. You kissed her back. She looked satisfied and replied to every move you made for her. When you kissed her neck, she writhed and gasped.

You continued to run your hand through Pieck’s hair while kissing her upper body. All the memories about you and her hit your head. When she gave you a beautiful smile on the first night you spent with her.

Your hand on her back now, hiding under her blouse to touch her soft skin. Your memories showed her figure when she always said your name when she let you touch her more deeply.

You know how to make her satisfied. You know her sensitive spot on her body. She once told you that she likes the way you touched her, something that she can’t get in her boyfriend. Of course, you're a girl, she's a girl. Who can understand better about girls? Obviously, girls themselves. Just like Katy Perry says in ‘I Kiss a Girl’, “Us girls, we are so magical. Soft skin, red lips, so kissable. Hard to resist, so touchable, too good to deny it.”

Besides, sometimes guys are too focused on how to make themselves satisfied rather than make their girls satisfied. And even some guys see girls as a tool to satisfy their appetites. That's why Pieck can't let you go.

You stop kissing her, “but I'm not your toy anymore.” Then you pulled her body and left her there alone in the powder room.

It is a hard decision, you still like her, but you've done being her toy. You'd tired waiting for her, whereas she always lets her boyfriend touch her like the way you used to. Now, it's time to cut her ties and open a new chapter. Plus, you found new chemistry in someone else.

If you read a manga of AOT comedy spin-off, Attack on Titan: Junior High by Saki Nakagawa (they an Isayama’s junior in college), the author made Nanaba seem to have a crush on Miche ambiguously. And many fans pair her with Miche, I like MikeNana ship as well, but just like Pieck, I also like her as a lesbian👩‍❤️‍👩💜

By the way, this story inspired by Hayley Kiyoko - Curious MV ✨

[itsadamcole]

all i want (for christmas)

fem!reader x roderick strong

it’s been four months since reader and roderick strong broke up. It’s been four months since they last talked, until they’re both invited to the same Christmas Eve party ... “all i want for christmas is for you and me to fix this”

word count: 3k+

warnings: angst, a little fluff, sad!reader, cheating accusations, mentions of cheating

— this is kinda based on liam payne’s “all i want (for christmas”. i love this christmas song so much —

masterlist || part 2 || request an imagine here

***

"Yeah, of course," you say, forcing a smile as you talk to Adam Cole. "I'll be there. I'm not going to let what happened get in the way of holiday celebrations."

Adam smiles, happy. "Yay," he says. "I'm sure the guys wouldn't mind see you there. It's been a very long time. Britt's even been saying how she misses hanging out with you and seeing you."

You give a little laugh and say, "Maybe I'll just steal her away from you for the night."

His smile fades and he jokes, "Don't you dare. I'd like to see my girlfriend at some point during the party."

"I'll think about it," you say. "See you in a few hours then."

Adam nods and walks off. The smile you've been managing to force drops immediately after he turns his back to you.

You would rather do anything else then attend a Christmas party that you know your ex-boyfriend will be attending. It's the Undisputed Era's annual Christmas party. They wear their green Undisputed Era sweaters and rent out a rental hall for the night from about seven until midnight the day before Christmas.

It's about three in the afternoon and there are four hours until the Christmas Eve party. You leave the Performance Center gym at four after you're done working out your anxiety about the party.

You head back to the house that you bought with said ex-boyfriend. You never found a place to move to after the breakup so you've been living here for the last four months.

After showering and blowdrying your Y/H/C colored hair, you curl your long locks and do your makeup. You do a dark red eye shadow with matching lipstick.

Once your hair and makeup are done, you walk to your closet. You look for anything that you could wear to a Christmas party. You find a dark red sequin dress.

The dress is short. ending about halfway down your thighs, with three-quarter sleeves. The sleeves cut off about halfway down your forearm, not quite reaching your wrists. The neck cuts right across your collarbone area, not showing a hint of cleavage. Usually, you'd wear something that shows off your chest but you decide against it tonight.

To complete the look, you put on a pair of dangly red diamond earrings and a silver bracelet. You wear a pair of dark red heels to match the sparkly dress.

As you finish getting ready, your phone begins to ring. You walk over to see that Kyle O'Reilly is calling. You sigh and answer the phone, saying, "Yes, Kyle. Relax. I'm about to leave to go to the party."

"Adam made me call," he says. "I told him to relax and that if you said that you would be there then you would. You're not one to back out on promises."

You close your eyes and sigh. Adam didn't make him call. You one-hundred percent knew that it was Roderick who made him call. You also knew that it was Roddy who made Adam ask you if you would come to the party.

"Tell Roderick that I'll be there," you say. "And don't tell me that it was actually Adam that made you call. I know it was Roddy."

Kyle stammers, "It definitely wasn't, uh, Roddy. He's, um, busy?"

You roll your eyes and say, "Sure. See you in a few, Kyle."

You hang up the phone and make sure you have everything you'll need. You take your car keys and leave the house.

The drive to the rental hall isn't that long. Well, it's close to forty five minutes that's not long enough to calm the anxiety you're feeling and the butterflies in your stomach.

It's been four months since you and Roddy broke up. You see each other at work all the time but something about an unprofessional atmosphere that is sending you into an anxiety attack as you drive.

Your hands are sweaty and your breathing is a little labored as your mind races. You have no idea what could happen tonight. You're terrified.

After you pull into a parking spot, you sit in the car watching several other wrestlers walk into the large building. It's close to seven before you get it together.

You form an objective as you click into the building. Find Britt Baker and don't leave her side.

Britt is your friend outside of WWE. You met her through Adam. You have several other friends that wrestle in AEW because of Britt introducing you since she wrestles for the brand. You hope that they're here too.

Christmas music blares from almost every direction of the room. You spot several pieces of mistletoe hanging on the ceiling as you look around at the decorations.

The boys definitely go all out but it's mostly Britt that makes them go all out. If it were up to the boys then there's be one tree and a few lights. But the room is full of decorations. A few trees are stationed throughout the room with bright bright lights. Gold garland is draped throughout the ceiling, almost hiding the green mistletoe.

The tables have red and green covers on them and each table has a little winter or Christmas themed figure in the middle.

"Ahh, Y/N!" you hear someone shout. You look to the left and see Britt Baker walking toward you with her arms out. She hugs you. "It's been too long, Y/N."

You smile and hug her back before you say, "It definitely has."

Britt pulls back and asks, "You holding up okay? I know how hard it must be to be here."

You nod and say, "I'm okay, I think. I'm just going to hope that I get through the night with no tears."

She smiles and says, "Well, you can stay by me. I was just hanging out over there with Reba and Brandi until I saw your cute ass walk through the door. That dress looks fabulous on you."

"Thank you," you say. "That dress looks good on you too."

Britt's wearing a strapless form-fitting red dress with a black belt around her waist. The top of the dress and the hem of the skirt is trimmed with white fluff. She's definitely dress as a more modern version of Mrs. Claus.

Your best friend smiles and says, "Thank you. Okay, lets go back to Reba and Brandi. We'll make sure you have fun tonight. No tears shall be shed while you're with us."

You laugh and walk over with Britt to Reba and Brandi Rhodes. Both Reba and Brandi both compliment your outfit. "It was a very last minute decision," you'd say when they compliment you, making both of them laugh.

As you're drinking and laughing with the girls, Adam walks over. He hugs his girlfriend from behind and kisses her cheek. "I hope that Y/N will let you come see me eventually," Adam says. "I'd like to spend some time with you."

Britt laughs and says, "Now now, Adam. She's having fun and that's our goal for tonight."

Adam nods and says, "It is." He looks at you as you take a sip of your egg nog. "He wants to see you at some point tonight, Y/N. He's sulking and staying away from you though. Please just go say hi to him and say thank you to him for inviting you."

You give a shaky sigh and glance around the room for your ex-boyfriend. You find him in a corner of the room as he talks to Kyle, Bobby, and one of the new girls that have started training at the Performance Center.

He's laughing at something the girl said and your heart wretches in your chest. "I think he's fine," you state. "And I think I'm gonna call it a night."

All the fun you were having for the past hour or so has washed away and now all you want to do is curl up on the couch with hot chocolate and watch Christmas movies on Netflix until you fall asleep. You don't want to be here anymore. No, you can't be here anymore.

As you start to get up, Adam says, "Y/N, I didn't mean to upset you."

You look at the leader of the Undisputed Era and say, "No, it's okay. I just promised myself no crying and if I stay then that's what's going to happen if I stay so I have to go."

Britt looks at you and says, "I'll come outside with you. Maybe I can convince you to stay."

The walls begin to close in on you and you shake your head. "No, that's okay," you say. "Enjoy the party."

You take once last glance at Roddy to see that he's looking at you before you start to walk toward door.

Your throat has closed up on you as you hold back tears. You walk to your car as you remember the laughter coming from Roddy as the girl said something.

"Y/N!" someone calls behind you as you reach the door.

The voice makes you almost lose it right then and there. You turn to see Roderick Strong walking behind you with a concerned look on his face. You shake your head and walk out onto the balcony area. On either side of this area are stairs that lead to the parking lot so technically you're just outside. The cool breeze whips through your hair and hits your face as you walk outside.

Roddy follows you. "Y/N, wait," he says. You sigh and look at your ex-boyfriend.

"What?" you ask, voice cracking. "Are you here just to walk out of my life again?"

Things didn't end very nicely between you and Roddy.

***

"Baby?" Roderick asks behind you.

You stand in your shared bedroom, holding his phone in your hands. Tears falling down your face as you look at the text notifications from his ex-wife on the lit up screen.

Roderick says, "Y/N? What's wrong?"

You sigh softly and read, "Roddy, love, when are you coming over? We want to see you tonight. Please text me when you get these." When you're finished reading, you look at your boyfriend. "What the fuck, Roddy? You told me it was over with her."

Roddy says, "It has been, Y/N. For two years."

"'Love'?" you say. "It's over but she still calls you 'love'. Okay, Roderick."

He walks over to you and he says, "It's not what it looks like, Y/N."

You cry, "I don't believe you, Roddy. I don't. I've seen you around her. You're happier when you're around her then you are with me. You constantly flirt with her and you disappear for days on end right after you talk to her."

Roderick says, "That's to see my son. You know that, Y/N. Do you really think that I'd cheat on you?"

"I don't know," you say. "You never let your son come over here and you just go over to her house. I've never even met your son after close to two years of dating. What's your lie for that?"

He looks slightly hurt as he says, "Because he's only three-years-old and he doesn't understand that his parents aren't together anymore. Adding you in there will only confuse him more. I've been waiting for the right time to introduce you to him, Y/N."

Things start to come together in your mind. That's a perfectly valid excuse. Troy is only three. He would be confused if you suddenly appeared in his life. He wouldn't understand why his parents aren't together. Roddy and his wife split shortly after Troy's first birthday and they've been co-parenting for years.

"I can't believe that you'd actually think I'd cheat on you," Roddy scoffs. "After two years, I thought you knew me better than that."

You immediately jump into defense mode as you say, "I'm sorry. I just never thought about how me being in Troy's life would confuse him. You're just gone for days on end and I-"

"Apparently don't trust me," Roderick says. He walks to the closet and grabs a suitcase. He puts clothes in it. "You don't trust me when all I do is go see my son, who I rarely get to see in the first place."

You say, "Roddy, please, I'm sorry. Please stay, let's just talk it out." You walk up to him and wrap your arms around his waist, not wanting to let go.

Roderick looks at you and says, "You don't trust me so why would I stay?" You look up at him and stay quiet. "Exactly." He takes his phone from you and walks toward the door.

You stand in the middle of the room, tears falling down your face. He stops, with his back turned to you and for a moment, you think he'll stay.

Your hopes are diminished as he walks down the hallway and down the stairs. Once the front door opens and closes, you start to cry. He left. He's gone.

***

You and Roderick stand face-to-face, alone for the first time in months.

"I never left," Roderick says. "You didn't trust me when all I did was leave to see my son."

Guilt hits you instantly and you say, "You could have stayed and we could have talked. I could have explained why I thought that you were cheating."

Roddy crosses his arms and he says, "So explain."

You say, "It's been four months, Roddy. What's the point?"

"I want to know if there was a reason behind why you thought that I was cheating on you," he says. "So explain."

You lean against the railing and you sigh. "It's because it wouldn't be the first time," you say. "When I first started in NXT, I met this guy and he would leave for a few days every few weeks. He would tell me he was visiting family. I received a DM from a girl who told me that she just found out that he was dating me and told me that him and her were dating each other. She had no idea about me. That's why I freaked out like I did because all I could think about was that message. I'll admit, I freaked out more than I should have but I was scared that it was happening again."

Roderick's expression and posture has softened as you explain your reasoning behind your freak out a few months ago.

Your words hang in the air for a few moments and you avoid looking at Roderick as soon as you're done talking.

Roderick finally breaks the silence when he says, "Kyle told me that you knew it was me that put him up to calling you earlier and that it was me that sent Adam to ask you to come. I wanted you here tonight, Y/N."

You finally look over at Roddy and ask, "Why? I thought you wouldn't want me around anymore after what happened."

"Because all I want this Christmas is for you and me to fix this," he says, reaching out and taking your hand. You look up at him with tear filled eyes. "I've missed you, Y/N. These past four months have been hell for me. I haven't gone a day without thinking about you and what would happen if we fixed things."

The tears start to fall down your cheeks as you listen to Roddy talk. You wait until he's done talking before you ask, "Why did it take you so long to try and fix this? Why did it take you four months?"

A car door closes and Roderick looks at the car. I look to see Roddy's ex-wife holding her son's hand. Her and Roddy's son. Troy.

Roderick says, "I've spent the past four months talking to Troy with Marina. We've been trying to get him to understand that his parents aren't together but that we're still his parents. Marina was talking to him about you, Y/N. She's been trying to get him to understand that she's his mother but that I'm with someone else."

Marina and Troy walk up the stairs and you look at Roddy. He looks at you before walking over to Marina and Troy. You stand in the same spot as Troy is picked up by Roddy. You see Roderick say something to Marina as she hands him a bag that was on her shoulder. She walks away and Roddy walks over to you with Troy.

Troy is looking at you and Roderick says, "So, Y/N. This is Troy. My son. This is the reason I left for a few days every few weeks."

You look at Roddy and ask, "After everything, you still want me to meet your son?"

Roderick nods and says, "I'm hoping that we'll fix things and that the past four months wouldn't have been a huge waste."

Troy says, "Y/N."

You raise your eyebrows and look at Troy. He smiles and holds his arms out to you. Roderick hands the toddler to you and you look at Roddy as you hold Troy in your arms.

Roderick smiles at the sight in front of him. "So what do you say?" he asks. "Give me a chance to fix things with us?"

You glance at Troy before looking at Roderick, saying, "Yes."

[camillemontespan]

ten years from now [AU. drake walker x camille montespan] [part eighteen: mojitos and sunrises]

@ibldw-main  @pug-bitch​  @jovialyouthmusic​ @katedrakeohd​ @rainbowsinthestorm​ @emichelle​ @dcbbw​ @sirbeepsalot​ @notoriouscs​ @burnsoslow​ @marshmallowsaremyfavorite​ @gardeningourmet​ @pedudley​ @marshmallowsandfire​ @princessleac1​  @simplymissjulia​ @kingliam2019​

'So let me get this straight,' Riley said, her blue eyes boring into Liam's. 'You were engaged to this girl Camille, about to get married in a few months at the Met, and you both visited her hometown in Texas to invite her old friends and see her grandmother. While there, she was reunited with her ex-best friend who turned out to also be her ex boyfriend who she lost her virginity to, and she fucked him. You were oblivious. Then you both come back to New York, she meets up with the ex boyfriend across town and fucks him again. Then her grandmother has a fall and Camille goes back to Texas to see her in hospital. When she comes back to New York, you are making her favourite dinner in a bid to apologise for not being able to leave work to go to Texas when she bursts into tears and tells you that she fucked the ex boyfriend twice and kissed him in some sort of maze.. You walk out and now the wedding is off. Have I got all that right?'

Liam nodded. 'That's it.' 

Riley stared at him. 'What a fucking bitch.' 

Liam let out a surprised laugh. 'Wow, don't hold back.' 

'But she is!' Riley cried, indignation flooding her face. 'You're a nice guy and from what you've told me, you did everything to keep her happy. You sent her grandma roses! Like, you are the ideal husband! But she gave that up to have dirty hotel room sex with her redneck cowboy ex boyfriend who she dated ten years ago!'

Liam sipped his scotch and shrugged. ‘Pretty much,’ he said. ‘Though he wasn’t a redneck-’

‘He slept with your fiancee, trust me, he is a redneck,’ Riley interrupted, her nose flaring. She shook her head. ‘What an asshole.’

Liam raised an eyebrow. ‘You’re quite opinionated, aren’t you?’

Riley sipped her drink and regarded Liam with a cool expression. They were the only ones left out of their colleagues; everyone else had gone home. But Liam and Riley had gotten more drinks and Riley had listened as Liam told her about his recent woes. 

‘What you see is what you get with me,’ Riley told him. ‘I don’t sugarcoat anything. I’m 100% honest. It scares some people..’

‘I think it’s refreshing,’ Liam assured her. ‘I like it.’

Riley’s cheeks turned pink as she cast her eyes down to study her glass. Liam smiled and gestured to the waitress for another two drinks. 

‘So you’ve heard my story,’ Liam said. ‘What’s yours?’

Riley squared her shoulders and looked at him straight on. ‘What do you want to know?’

‘Just tell me about you. Where you’re from, family, dating history, college?’

Riley rolled her eyes. ‘Okay, so I’m from Jersey-’

Liam winced. Riley laughed. ‘Oh, I know. I know. So yeah, I’m from Jersey.  I have two older brothers but we don’t speak anymore. Three ex boyfriends - I dumped them.  I attended Art School and graduated with distinction.’

Liam’s eyes widened. ‘Oh wow. So why are you working on Wall Street if you’re an artist?’

The waitress dropped off their two new drinks which Riley took gratefully. She took a long sip and smacked her cherry lips together. Liam’s eyes flicked to her bottom lip; he quickly looked away. 

‘Because the money is fucking good,’ she answered bluntly. ‘Why do you work on Wall Street?’

Liam blinked. A slow smile formed on his face and he chuckled. ‘Because the money is fucking good.’

Riley raised her glass and clinked it against Liam’s. ‘Let’s toast to money.’

‘To money,’ Liam said grandly. ‘Though it isn’t the be and end all.’

Riley rolled her eyes. ‘Fine. It’s not. But it does let us buy all the drinks we want and that is what matters.’

Liam laughed and tossed the scotch down his throat. Riley regarded him silently, her eyebrow quirking up; she looked quite mischievous. 

‘I have a guilty pleasure,’ she said in a low voice. ‘Do you promise not to judge me if I tell you it?’

Liam smiled. ‘Tell me.’

Riley drained the last of her scotch. ‘I love karaoke bars..’

Liam threw his head back as he laughed. ‘Oh god, you’re so not cool,’ he teased.

‘I know I’m not!’ Riley cried. ‘I never try to be. I love karaoke bars. Wanna come to one with me?’

‘I don’t sing-’

‘Doesn’t matter,’ Riley interrupted. ‘It’s fun.’

‘I can’t..’

Riley sighed. She looked at Liam with a steady stare, clearly not taking any of his excuses. ‘When was the last time you did something that was fun?’ she asked. ‘That was new? That forced you to just let go?’

Liam considered her question. He couldn’t remember. His life had been a conveyor belt of early mornings, late nights in the office and trying to make Camille happy.  

He sighed. ‘Fine. Let’s go to a karaoke bar..’

Riley stood up and dragged him to his feet. ‘No need to act like you’re heading for your execution,’ she quipped. ‘Come on, I know a place two blocks from here.’

Liam followed her out of the bar towards the karaoke bar that was lit up in neon.  As he listened to Riley talk incessantly,he felt like he was leaving behind a life of grey and was now entering a world of colour. 

*********************************************

Liam and Riley were now hammered on mojitos. They had hired a private room for an hour and Riley had squealed in excitement when she saw that there was a dressing up box for customers to rifle through. She threw a feather boa around Liam’s shoulders, telling him that he looked fabulous.

He watched her as she sang along to Total Eclipse of the Heart, badly. But she didn’t care. She belted out the ballad, closing her eyes and swaying, even raising her fist in the air like the diva she was. Liam had laughed and enjoyed watching her. He felt relaxed. He had even loosened his tie.

‘Okay, your go!’ Riley said, throwing herself down on the velvet booth next to him. ‘Entertain me!’

Liam groaned but he still stood up to look through the catalogue. He considered his options before throwing caution to the wind.

Riley’s eyes widened as she heard the opening bars. ‘Oh my god..’

Liam threw his shoulders back and adopted a haughty pose. He wrapped the feather boa around his neck and placed a bowler hat on his head, keeping his eyes to the floor as he waited for his line.

‘At first I was afraid, I was petrified...kept thinking I could never live without you by my side..’

Riley clapped her hands, laughing as she watched Liam start the song.

But then I spent so many nights thinking how you did me wrong, and I grew strong and I learned how to get along.. FROM OUTER SPACE!’

Liam twirled on his foot, the feather boa flying around him as he started to strut drunkenly across the room, swinging his hips.

‘I just walked in to find you here with that sad look upon your face, I should have changed that stupid lock, I should have made you leave your key..’

‘YEAH BABY!’ Riley shouted, pointing at him. ‘You tell her!’

Liam continued to sing. He became more extravagant as the song went on; he twirled; he spun; he pointed at Riley; he tossed his hat in the air and caught it. For some reason, he had abandoned his usual quiet persona and was now this ridiculous, camp performer. But he didn’t care. He was enjoying himself. He felt alive.

He looked at Riley, who was watching him in wonder, and gave her a wink. She blushed.

Liam grinned and continued to dance and sing, his voice growing in confidence and volume. For the first time in what felt like forever, he felt like he had unlocked the old Liam. The Liam who used to go out and have fun. The Liam who enjoyed life. The Liam before he became a Wall Street minion. The Liam before he got cheated on. The Liam before he met Camille.

He felt happy.

*********************************

Drake opened his eyes. As his vision adjusted, he realised he was lying on the couch with Camille curled up against him. For a moment, he smiled, his heart flipped and he felt content. Until he realised that he had accidently fallen asleep and was in Camille’s grandmother’s house. 

He glanced at the clock on the wall. 6am.

‘Shit!’ he hissed, bolting up. Camille jumped, her eyes opening as he disturbed her slumber. Yawning, she looked up and visibly reeled back when she saw that she had been sleeping beside him.

‘Drake!’

‘We fell asleep,’ Drake told her. ‘Fuck, I should go. It’s 6am..’

Camille jumped to her feet. Her dark hair was tousled and she had sleep in her eyes; she looked perfectly imperfect. Drake’s heart flipped again but he pushed it down as he stood up and arranged the cushions on the couch so Gisele wouldn’t have to tidy up after them. 

‘Sorry,’ Camille whispered. ‘I didn’t realise we had fallen asleep. Must have been the whiskey.’

Drake sighed. ‘It’s alright, my fault too. Heh. Anyway, I should go..’

Camille followed him silently out of the living room, wrapping her arms around her body. She unlocked the front door; the sun was beginning to rise, casting a golden glow. She smiled up at Drake. ‘Thank you for tending to the roses,’ she said. ‘I really appreciate it.’

Drake smiled bashfully. ‘Happy to help,’ he told her. He moved to leave the house but stopped short when he looked up at the morning sky. He cast a look back at Camille who was leaning against the threshold, looking slightly embarrassed. 

‘Do you want to watch the sunrise with me?’ he asked without thinking. ‘The lake will look gorgeous right now.’

Camille tucked her hair behind her ear and smiled down at the floor. ‘I’d like that,’ she murmured. ‘That sounds.. Perfect.’

Drake grinned and held out his hand for her to take. Camille took his hand, her hands soft and small in his, and together they wandered up the road towards the ranch. Drake smiled to himself as he kept repeating the mantra ‘baby steps’ in his mind. Baby steps. Baby steps. 

**************************************

The water was glimmering gold. Camille let out a gasp as she took in the sunrise and how beautiful it was. She sat down on the jetty with Drake beside her and they watched the sun slowly come up, greeting the day. 

‘This is beautiful,’ Camille whispered. She cast a look at Drake and reached out to take his hand. ‘Thanks for inviting me to see it.’

Drake blushed. The sunrise had cast his face in a golden glow; his brown eyes changed colour in the light, turning green, which meant his eyes were always a surprise.  Camille loved Drake’s eyes. He was smiling as if he couldn’t believe his luck, the kind of smile that made the butterflies in Camille’s stomach start fluttering wildly, and a strand of his dark hair fell over his left eye, making him look shy and awkward. He looked like the boy she had known all those years ago. But when he turned to look at her, Camille could now see the man he had grown into and she couldn’t help but feel the butterflies flutter even more. 

‘I love watching the sunrise,’ he told her. ‘It’s peaceful. If you want.. We could do this again?’

Camille smiled. ‘I’d love that.’

Drake gently wrapped his arm around her shoulder and brought her in close to him; Camille inhaled his scent. He smelled of whiskey and the forest. He smelled like home. 

[mycatshuman]

I Put A Spell On You

All Hallows Eve

Pairings: eventual prinxiety, logicality, Remile

Warnings: talk of bad break up and bad ex, please let me know if I missed any.

Thank you so so much to @civilsounds17 and @icequeenoriginal if it weren't for you two fabulous people, this probably wouldn't exist outside of Google docks. Thank you. 💚💚💚💚💚💚💚💚💜💜💜💜💜💜

Please forgive me for not having the read more. The mobile thing isn't working for me and I have no way to a desktop version.

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Salem, Massachusetts, 2019

An older woman in black steps through the aisles of desks as her students listen to her tale. "And so, the Sanderson brothers were hanged by the Salem town folk. And now, there are those who say that on Halloween night, two black cats still guard the old Sanderson house. Warning off any who might make the witches come back from the dead." The teacher threw a handful of plastic spiders at a student in front of Roman Prince. The student shrieked before the class dissolved into giggles.

Roman scoffed. "Give me a break."

The teacher raised an eyebrow. "Do we have a skeptic in our midst?" She asked

Roman rolled his eyes. "Halloween is nothing but a holiday invented by the candy companies to earn more money. It's all a conspiracy."

Now normally, Roman would be all for Halloween, but due to a recent event that had him crying to sleep most nights, he was all too grumpy and hurt to properly get excited for the spooky holiday.

"It just so happens that Halloween is based on the ancient feast known as All Hallow's Eve. It's said to be the one night a year where the spirits of the dead can return to Earth," a young teen, wearing a soft cream-colored sweater corrected. Emile Picani. Roman groaned. He loved his friend. He did! And he really appreciated his friend trying to cheer him up with some knowledge on one of his favorite holidays, but at this moment he really couldn't deal with it. He was just too down in the dumps. He really shouldn't let it affect him. He should be happy and bright, but he just couldn't find it in himself.  

"Whatever."

The bell rang and teenagers filed out of the classroom. Emile grabbed his things and then waited for Roman to gather his stuff before they both left the classroom to meet up with Patton.

They found their cheery friend outside waiting for them underneath one of the tall trees outside of the high school. The two friends watched as an orange leaf floated down and landed in Patton's curly auburn hair. Roman let a small smile spread across his face at the sight of his friend with a leaf in his hair. The two friends walked up to stand by Patton as he finished a conversation with someone in his cooking class. Once he was done and the other person left, Patton turned to his friends with a smile.

"Hey, guys! How was Miss Dennison's class?" The bubbly teen pushed up his circular glasses and pulled his grey cardigan tighter around himself to offer some protection against the crisp fall air.

Emile shot a glance towards Roman, his warm brown eyes twinkling with concern. "Well, she told the story about the Sanderson Brothers. So that was nice." He left out the part about Roman's "outburst", unsure if whether or not he should mention it. The three set off towards their neighborhood. Their feet crunching on random leaves as they walked down the sidewalk.

Roman sighed and pinched the bridge of his nose. He suddenly felt incredibly guilty. He dropped his arm and shoved his hands in the pockets of his letterman jacket. "Hey, Emile," he called softly, his friend in question turned his attention to him. "I'm sorry. I didn't mean to be so grumpy."

Emile gave his friend an empathic smile. "It's okay, Roman. I know you're feeling a little down."

The elephant in the room made Patton grimace. The knowledge of his friend hurting made unpleasant emotions storm his mind.

He forced a smile on his face. "So, what are we doing for Halloween tonight?" He asked, trying to change the subject.

Roman bit his lip. "I don't think I want to do anything tonight."

"What?!?!" Both Emile and Patton exclaimed, shock evident on their faces, Halloween was one of their friend’s favorite holidays.

Roman shrugged and looked away as they walked along the sidewalk. Young children in costumes ran by excitedly on their hunt for candy in the late daylight. "I just want to get my homework done before the weekend."

Emile and Patton shared a look as they followed after Roman. "But you love Halloween. You always have the best costumes."

"You always spend months planning and working on your costumes. So why....?"

Roman's shoulders hunched up by his ears and he pulled on his jacket sleeves. "Well, I just wanted to be mature, you know." Roman picked at the red and gold stripes of his jacket. He forced down the lump in his throat. "I-I mean, Matt didn't like that I was so immature. He was tired of the singing and dancing and childish movies. That's why he left so I just thought that I should probably grow up if I ever wanted to actually be able to be romanced." He forced his line of sight on a distant tree to avoid the sympathetic looks from his friends.

Emile bit his lip as he tried to come to a decision on how to approach this conversation. Meanwhile, Patton was fuming. He half wanted to strangle Roman's ex. How dare he make his best friend feel this way?!?! It made him so mad and upset. He let out a silent huff of breath. After taking a deep breath to slowly calm down, he took a few moments to think up a plan. Then he rushed forward to catch up with his friend and walk beside Roman. "Hey! I have an idea!" Roman raised an eyebrow as he shot a glance towards Patton, Emile sharing a similar expression.

"What is it?" Emile asked.

Patton began to physically vibrate as he held in a squeal, building up the excitement. "Come on Patton? Share with the class." Roman chuckled, thankful for the distraction.

"We should go to the Sanderson House!" He burst out energetically. His friends raised an eyebrow in sync.

"Why?"

"The kitties! What if they're there!!" He squealed. Roman snorted.

"But you're allergic," Emile said.

"No one can stop me."

Roman scoffed. "You wouldn't go alone, there could be spiders."

Patton shivered, the cool autumn air not being the cause but certainly not helping him. "Mm. While the idea of the creepy-crawly death dealers is scary, I still want to see if the cats are there."

Roman rolled his eyes. "I highly doubt that the 'brothers turned cats' are there, Patton."

"It's scientifically impossible," Emile added once he caught up. "But, it does sound very appealing."

"You too, Emile?" Roman asked.

Emile grinned. "Hey, cats are worth everything."

Roman rolled his eyes. "Alright, yeah, let’s go to the Sanderson house tonight. Sounds fun. Sounds dangerous. Let's go!" He exclaimed as they finally entered their neighborhood. "When are we going?"

Patton shrugged and pulled out a bag of trail mix and began munching on his snack. "Sometime tonight. I guess." He munched on his food thoughtfully for a few moments, deciding the best way to approach the subject he was about to bring up. "So, are you going to dress up?"

Roman bit his lip. "I guess I could throw something together real quick if you wanted me to."

Patton nodded and Emile let out a soft breath. "I'm going as a Dad."

Roman nodded. "Interesting. Why?"

Patton shrugged. "I don't know, just sounded like a good excuse to use a bunch of puns."

Emile nodded. "Sounds nice. I'm going as a therapist." He fixed his glasses smiling brightly.

"These are things you guys actually want to be, why dress up like them?" Roman asked.

His friends shrugged. "Well, we want to see if it actually makes us happy."

Roman nodded absently. His thoughts trailing off towards what he could possibly do for a costume in just a few hours. Soon enough they came to his house. He waved goodbye to his friends and rushed inside and up the stairs to his bedroom as fast as possible before bursting through his door and dropping his backpack on the floor. He shut his door and leaned back against it, resting his head as he let out a deep sigh. He took a glance around and felt his heart twist painfully.

Roman used to like his room. There were Disney posters everywhere. And there were musical posters and playbills pinned to every surface. There were stuffed animals on the bed, a sewing machine on the desk, complete with a box of fabric sitting underneath. That's how his room looked when he first got together with Matt. And that's how it looked through their whole relationship. Unfortunately, it was the same room they had their breakup fight in. All Roman had asked was if they could watch Moana. Then Matt exploded, calling him immature and childish because of all the things he did and enjoyed. Then he left. And Roman was left alone in his room that was too childish for his first boyfriend. After a few hours of crying Roman had ripped the posters and playbills off the walls and shoved them on a shelf in his closet. He shoved the stuffed animals, sewing machine, and fabrics behind his clothes in the closet.

He hardly opened his closest anymore. He grabbed most of his clothes from his dresser. He didn't like his room anymore. It was so bare. So, boring. He didn't like being in his room anymore. He glanced towards the closed doors on the opposite side of his room and bit his lip. He suddenly remembered what he had been working on before his boyfriend had come in to break up with him. He inched over to the doors and braced himself to open them. He whipped open the doors and found all of his favorite things sitting neglected in boxes.

He kneeled down and dragged out one of the boxes and began shifting around and then his hands closed around a piece of white fabric. He pulled it out and felt a tingle in his fingers as he spread out the mostly finished costume and felt his lips twitch slightly. He set the costume on the floor before pulling out the rest of what he needed. He suddenly felt a little more excited about tonight. It would be nice to get out of the house. Sort of like an adventure.

Roman smiled as he set to work finishing his costume. He had the eerie feeling that this was an adventure that was going to change his life. For better or worse, he had no idea what it would be. He just hoped it would be for the better.

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Taglist: @spxced-oxt @superwholocked-for-life @mirror2thespirit @aroundofapplesauce @lyditist

If you wish to be added or taken off, please let me know.

[indulgnces]

hi howdy hello!! i go by jess and this is my first time playing my sweet bb girl, so i’m pumped! more about my girl audrey below the cut!

❛  ( SARAH JEFFERY )  ◈  dude, shut up ! AUDREY ROSE from DESCENDANTS is on screen. their fans swear they’re just DETERMINED & OUTGOING, but we’ve all seen their JEALOUS & STUBBORN side ! according to TRUMAN WIKIA, they’re TWENTY-ONE years old, BISEXUAL, & identify as CISFEMALE ( SHE/HER ). they’re currently a STUDENT & are RELIEVED about life in truman. luckily they have HER DIARY & HER SONGBIRD NECKLACE with them & can visit THE FAIRY COTTAGE whenever they want. penned by JESS.

sooooooooo confession: i’ve never watched a descendants movie from start to finish 😬 I know! crazy considering I’m playing a character from the movies, but like, have you guys ever seen a character and just be like wOW, that is My Type of character? cause that’s what happened with audrey. descendants 3 came out and was trending, and I checked the tag and like was 👀👀👀 to audrey to the point that I watched queen of mean and got HOOKED. caught a replay of the movie and watched all the audrey parts while skipping over the rest. since then I’ve been in love with my girl and she’s been on my mind so much that I’m returning to rp after a small break to play my girl. In preparation I skimmed through descendants 1 & 3, and adurey’s youtube short story so I’m good to GO. 

CANON LIFE

“A lifetime of plans, gone. Our family status, gone. Audrey, you were supposed to be his Queen, and you let him slip through your fingers. Your mother could hold onto a prince in her sleep.” 

daughter of sleeping beauty and prince phillip, princess audrey has been groomed since she was a child by her grandmother to become the queen of auradon. she’d been friends with prince ben since she was a child, and was expected to marry him when she got older.

grew up used to the finer things of life, and as such, audrey was a bit self-absorbed and spoiled. became the most popular girl in school due to her status and beauty. was cheer captain. finally became romantically involved with ben at some point in high school. life was going exactly as planned. 

then ben decided to invite 4 villain kids (vks) from the isle of the lost to auradon, and everything went to shit. the stark black and white, good vs. evil mentality was deeply ingrained in audrey’s psyche, so she was very much AGAINST the idea of any isle kids coming over. convinced the vks were up to no good, she never warmed up to the them, and bullied them (mostly mal) at times. and you know what? she was RIGHT

mal used a love potion to steal her boyfriend, who then humiliated audrey by serenading mal during a tourney match, where audrey was cheering at. no one gave two shits though?? or suspected foul play at all?? they just cheered and were like “ah, cool! our soon-to-be-king has suddenly declared his love for this new vk who’s only been here for a few days! how awesome and totally natural !! “

audrey was still plenty popular by the end of the movie, but her fairy godmothers decided to treat adurey to a spa trip, which turned into an extended trip that required her needing summer school bc she missed so much school (aka why she was absent for descendants 2)

by the time audrey came back in descendants 3, everyone was ALL up mal’s ass crack. ben proposed to mal in front of everyone, serenading her with the SAME song he did in the first movie when he ceremoniously proclaimed his love for mal while simultaneously dumping audrey, and everyone cheered AGAIN for their union. damn thing broke audrey’s whole ass heart. on top of that, her grandmother chastised audrey for her failures in securing ben and basically failing the family. 

she also lost her status come d3??? like, at the end of d1, she was still cool as fuck. but come d3 girl is not even being invited to her friend’s birthday parties anymore?? she has no friends?? no one gives two shits about how she must be dealing with everything? and wow does that not help things at all.

that night, in her loneliness and anger, audrey decided to steal the queen’s crown from the artifacts museum. it was a petty thing. she was hurt, and just did NOT want to see the crown she’d envisioned as her own for all her life be placed on mal’s head. she didn’t have a goal beyond taking the crown. however, when she went to the museum, maleficent’s scepter sensed audrey’s emotions and desires for revenge, and revealed itself to her. it’s glow lured audrey to it, fed into her emotions, and bing bang boom, audrey became the ultra fabulous QUEEN OF MEAN 

under the scepter's influence, she put half of auradon under a sleeping spell, the other half she turned to stone, then she made ben a beast after he rejected her, and made mal an ugly old hag. she was foiled at the end by mal, and ended up falling under a sleeping curse as a result. with no True Love’s Kiss to awaken her (rip), the heroes ended up getting Hades to use his magic to wake her up.

at the end, she apologizes for her crimes & her emotions were finally acknowledged when mal and ben stepped up and apologized for their inconsiderate past actions to audrey (wELL, they never actually apologize?? they say ‘I owe you an apology” but both don’t like actually say sorry, and that’s 100% something audrey has noticed for sure). she celebrates at the end with everyone else when the barrier is brought down and is last seen dancing with harry hook 

POST CANON

totally headcanon that she’s still not 100% happy as she’s shown in the end while dancing around okay

she’s STILL lonely!! she STILL wants those apologies!! she’s STILL lost about what to do with her future now that her whole life plan has blown up in smokes. she’s HURT okay. her friends? abandoned her! ben? abandoned her! that one hurts the most bc after spotting that pic of audrey/ben as children together, I 100% hc that they have been best buds for years before falling into a relationship. and while it’s clear ben was not really ~in love~ with audrey ( i image they ended up getting together bc it was just Expected yknow?), audrey still had feelings for ben. even if it wasn’t true love (she def wasn’t In Love tho she thought she was), she did still love ben. he was her best friend, and the fact that he never came around to apologize to her for humiliating her the way he did after the love spell broke HURT. 

also hc that she had to take a remedial goodness class following her stunt 

the ending given to her is life a brief showing of her and harry hook smiling at each other all soft like before dancing, which like, i’m game for, but in terms of her actual future, audrey was trying to figure out just how to do life moving forward following everything

TRUMAN

“Tell me it was all a bad dream.”

yeah so I said audrey was relieved about her life in truman? 100000% true!

her life was incredibly sad and lonely before, so convincing her that all that shit was all just a bad dream was an incredibly easy thing to do for the descendants actors okay (im sad for her bc of this tbh)

her life as she knows it: she still comes from a family of high status and money. not technically a princess, but she sure does act like one. believes she was born and raised in truman, but was sent to boarding school at auradon prep since she was a child, where she thrived and grew into a typical Popular Girl (head of cheer team/one of the most beautiful girls), before returning to truman after graduating. basically she believes she had the same perfect life she had before in canon, minus the vks, ben, and the whole fairy tale/royalty stuff (basically everything that ruined that perfect life).

all that other extra stuff, including going all queen of mean and losing ben and being drop kicked by literally everyone, is just POOF, fuzzy memories, bad vivid horror story nightmares! every now and then she’ll witness an engagement, or spot a serenade, and it’ll trigger an overwhelming sense of sadness, but for the most part, she’s content putting her life behind her. her new life is a much happier one. that could totally change once she starts encountering people from her past life again.

only really recognizes her family members as family members, and maybe recognizes some past auradon friends (maybe chad charming as her ex since he’s the only one who didn’t totally abandon her rip)

since “returning” to truman, she’s entered university on the island. she wasn’t sure where she was going with life, but she knew she’s always been really good at drawing and really good at event planning. so in uni, she decided to keep her artistic talents as a hobby and pursue a career in event planning. in pursuit of this, she’s a senior at college, majoring in hospitality management.

PERSONALITY

positive: determined, headstrong, outgoing, self-assured, polite, moral, dedicated 

negative: jealous, stubborn, demanding, bossy, petty, close-minded, seemingly mean (tho she doesn’t consider herself mean, okay? she just can come off as mean/rude)

CANON CONNECTIONS

ben & mal: need them both bc they are the ones who hurt her the most so i’d loooooove to play out these dynamics in truman!! they’d be the most Triggering faces for her 

jay & harry & chad & uma: underrated audrey ships i’d love to play out bc literally crumbs are given to the majority of these dynamics, and so I want to just...explore them?? three of these 4 are vks and 2 of those 3 are people audrey actively pursued in some sort of ~connection~ at the end of the movies when the Couples got together, and she did that even tho she is very Moral and has confusing feelings about vks, and i just wanna know more!! 

TRUMAN CONNECTIONS

yeah this is getting long, so I’m planning on posting a whole separate post in the truman plot tag for these wanted connections! 

and yeah! that’s everything on my girl! if you’ve made it this far, you’re the best my dudes!! I’m gonna be on mobile for a good portion of the day before coming on at night, but if you’d like to do any kind of plotting with my girl, just go ahead and hit that like button, and I’ll slide in y’alls dms! ♥

[flexiblefish]

Source:[X]

by Gavanndra Hodge 12 JANUARY 2019

Gillian Anderson is hard to pin down. Is she American or English? (Her accent slips between the two, depending on who she is talking to.) Guarded or warm? (She can be either, based on her mood.) Tough or vulnerable? (Or both?)

'‘Because my parents were American and we lived here in the UK, there was always a sense of not quite fitting in. Because of that I’ve always felt a bit of an outsider. I have perpetuated that because that is what feels familiar to me, it is what feels comfortable,’ she explains. When we meet Anderson is English and warm, talking about the birthday parties she has to organise (she has three children, Piper, 24, Oscar, 12, and Felix, 10); and although she is very petite, wearing white patent stiletto boots and slender black trousers, she exudes the commanding charisma that makes her perfect for her imminent roles. Rumour has it that she will be playing Margaret Thatcher in an upcoming series of The Crown, the Netflix series created and co-written by her partner, Peter Morgan. No one is confirming this, but no one is denying it either. Meanwhile, this month she stars in a new Netflix series, Sex Education, in which she plays a sex therapist who lives with her teenage son (Asa Butterfield). And in February Anderson has another plum role: Margo Channing in Belgian theatre director Ivo van Hove’s much-anticipated adaptation of All About Eve, also starring Lily James as Eve, with music by PJ Harvey. The play – a modern reinterpretation of the 1950 film, which starred Bette Davis as Channing, a blazing Broadway star who is gradually supplanted by a younger rival – is about ambition and betrayal, femininity and anger, stardom and personal sacrifice. Anderson’s is a bravura role, one that requires not just the cool intensity that we have come to expect from her, but also humour. Channing is deliciously droll, delivering endlessly quotable lines with comic precision (‘I’ll admit I may have seen better days, but I’m still not to be had for the price of a cocktail, like a salted peanut’). ‘A couple of years ago my boyfriend Pete said to me, “You know what would be a great role for you? Margo Channing,”’ Anderson says. ‘So I rewatched the film and I thought, “Oh my God, how much fun would that be!”’ Anderson, not one to wait for opportunity, discovered that theatre producer Sonia Friedman had the rights to the script and was working on it with van Hove – Cate Blanchett was set to be Channing. ‘So I thought, “Ah OK, I’ll just slink into the background.” Then my agents got a call to say that she [Blanchett] had backed out due to scheduling conflicts, and there was interest, and was I interested? So I was like, “Yes! When’s the meeting? Now?”’ Van Hove, on the phone from New York, is equally excited to be working with Anderson. ‘Margo needs someone who understands what the theatre is all about, someone who can carry a play, who can occupy the whole stage, and Gillian can do that; she is a fabulous theatre actress. Although, of course, she became iconic for me in the 1990s when she was in The X-Files.’ There is something a little surprising about Ivo van Hove, an avant-garde director celebrated for his reinterpretations of plays and operas such as Hedda Gabler, Antigone and Lulu, professing fandom for a mid-’90s sci-fi series; but that is to forget the huge cultural impact of The X-Files, its quality and its ingenuity. The series was about two FBI agents, played by Anderson and David Duchovny, who attempt to unravel various natural and supernatural mysteries. No one expected it to become such a success, least of all Anderson, who was 24 when she was cast in the show. It was her first major role and it made her a star. She won multiple awards for her portrayal of the sceptical Dr Dana Scully, including an Emmy and a Golden Globe. But such stardom often involves sacrifice and Anderson was suffering. The production schedule for The X-Files was brutal, involving 16-hour days for nine months of the year. Furthermore, in 1994, aged 25, Anderson married Clyde Klotz, assistant art director on the series, and nine months later she gave birth to their daughter, Piper. After three years she and Klotz divorced. It was while she was pregnant that Anderson started having severe panic attacks. ‘I was having them daily,’ she explains, experiencing palpitations, numbness, ‘hallucinations, all of it’. Things didn’t get better once Piper was born. ‘I was a young mother, and shortly after that we were separating, and I was working these crazy hours. I remember periods of time when I was just crying, my make-up was being done over and over again and I was not able to stop crying.’ Anderson sought solace in meditation. ‘I went to somebody and there was a meditation we did together. We went to some quite dark places and I got to see that I could still survive those dark places, I was stronger than they were, and after that the panic attacks stopped.’ Anderson had been having panic attacks, on and off, ‘since high school’. As a teenager she was a daydreamer and a troublemaker who felt different from her peers in Michigan because of her childhood in Harringay, having left the ‘incy-bincy flat with a bathroom outside’ that she and her parents lived in when she was 11 years old, when her family moved back to the US. ‘I started falling in with groups and trying to fit in, until it got to the point when it was like, “I don’t f—ing want to fit in. I want to look completely different to all of you, and stop staring at me because I have a mohawk.” I’d shave the sides of my head with a razor blade and dye my hair different colours.’ Anderson’s parents, Rosemary and Ed, were living in Chicago and were both just 26 when she was born. Soon afterwards the family moved to London so Ed could attend film school, while Rosemary worked as a computer programmer. ‘My parents were working very hard and would often work late. I have lots of memories of playing by myself in the back garden and searching for friends in the neighbourhood because I didn’t have siblings.’ After moving back to America, Rosemary and Ed had two more children, a son and a daughter. Anderson admits that her adolescent waywardness might have been related to the arrival of two new babies in the house. ‘I made trouble and I got attention that way.’ Acting is another way to get attention, something Anderson learnt early on. ‘I remember being in a play when I was in primary school. I was meant to be a Chelsea fan. I started chewing gum on stage and blowing bubbles and got all the attention. I thought, “This is all right, everybody is watching me!”’ But when she reached 16 and started doing more professional productions in America, performing became fundamentally important to her. ‘I enjoyed the connection between performer and audience, the control. And I remember thinking, “I can do this. They are showing me I can do this.” 'It changed everything in my life, knowing I could do something. Prior to that there hadn’t been that moment yet when I found purpose and direction.’ Anderson decided that she wanted to pursue acting as a career and was accepted at The Theatre School at DePaul University in Chicago. ‘From the very start of school I didn’t go into the dorms, instead I found an apartment with a roommate in a funky neighbourhood. I was the only one who was living out of school. That is my pattern, carving my own thing. 'All through [theatre] school I dressed like I was a member of The Cure. That was how I was in the world, grungy, not considered, not mature. I was forthright and gutsy – I drove myself to Chicago in my dad’s VW van – but slightly falling apart.’ She always knew she would return to England. ‘My childhood here, the smell of north London, it has such a massive tug on me. I really felt, when we moved to the States, that I would eventually have a life back here.’ She and Piper moved to the city after The X-Files ended its original run, and she went on to have two more children, Oscar and Felix, with her now ex-boyfriend, businessman Mark Griffiths (there was also a marriage to British documentary maker Julian Ozanne, which lasted for two years, with the couple separating in 2006).

In the UK Anderson’s career developed in a way that might not have been expected for the golden girl of ’90s sci-fi. She took juicy roles in big-budget period dramas – Lady Dedlock in Bleak House, Miss Havisham in Great Expectations – and appeared on stage, at the Royal Court and the Donmar Warehouse. But it was her performance in the BBC detective drama The Fall, starting in 2013, that solidified her reputation as the go-to actor for female characters who are charismatic and powerful. Anderson, as DSI Stella Gibson, was imperious in her white silk shirts and high heels, unwavering in her pursuit of the serial killer played by Jamie Dornan. The screenwriter Allan Cubitt created the role of Gibson with Anderson in mind. ‘I wanted Gibson to be an enigmatic figure. Gillian is a riveting actress, but there is an aloofness to her as well. Also I was attempting to reclaim the idea of the powerful femme fatale, without the fatale; someone who is aware that her beauty can be used to help her ends. That she is unafraid of that was radical.’ Anderson was deeply involved in the creation of Gibson’s look, altering the way she thought about herself in the process. ‘What fascinated me about her, and I feel that we were able to find that in the costume design, was that the way she dressed never felt like it was for anyone else but her. I don’t think I have necessarily changed the way I dress since her, but I feel like I am certainly more conscious of what I wear and what it says.’ As a younger woman her style was ‘messy, like a discarded urchin’. She would wear oversized suits and ‘floppy dresses that I had probably stolen from the thrift store’. Whereas now her look is sleek, and she favours brands like Jil Sander, Prada and Dries Van Noten. The Fall was about gender, power and desire; and it was while filming it in Belfast that Anderson began thinking more about the struggles that women face in the 21st century. ‘I was reading all these statistics about young girls being suicidal and having such low self-esteem and I thought, “Surely, given everything that we know, and the fact we are all having these feelings, can we not start a conversation about whether we want this and how to deal with it?”’ This morphed into her writing a book, We: A Manifesto for Women Everywhere, with her friend, the writer and activist Jennifer Nadel, in 2017. Alternating between pieces by Anderson and Nadel, it details their own personal struggles, and includes practical sections on how to deal with issues such as anxiety and low self-esteem using practices such as meditation, affirmations and gratitude lists. ‘We both know how it feels to be in emotional pain,’ says Nadel. ‘Both of us have felt lost, and found a spiritual way out. Both of us have experienced radical transformation as a result of the things that we wrote about in that book.’ Cubitt and Nadel each say that among the most impressive things about Anderson, as a collaborator, are her focus and drive. ‘I have never met anyone with Gillian’s ability to focus. And she has a certainty about things, she is not mired in indecision,’ says Nadel. What this means is not just an incredibly long CV, but numerous satellite projects. Anderson has a line of smart, grown-up clothes that she has developed with the brand Winser London (‘I didn’t realise I was so opinionated about buttons!’). She also works for numerous charities, focusing especially on women’s rights and environmental issues. ‘Because of my work ethic and also having had such high expectations, both of myself and other people’s of me, at such a young age, I think it became near to impossible for me to relax at all, to do anything that wasn’t work-related, so a lot of my later adult life has been trying to force myself to do that, and I struggle so hard, and sometimes I lose sight of it. So there is a part of me that wonders if I am slightly addicted [to work], I learnt it so young.’ The scant spare time that Anderson allows herself is spent ‘going to the cinema, to the theatre, watching documentaries’. Piper, who has just completed a degree in production and costume design, is now living in her mother’s basement, and the two of them recently went on a trip to Amsterdam to see van Hove’s four-hour stage adaptation of the Hanya Yanagihara novel A Little Life. That might not sound like everyone’s cup of tea, but Anderson loved it. And despite all the seriousness and the self-examination (or perhaps because of it), she is good company, thoughtful and witty. She has, she says, got happier as she has got older, less self-critical, more self-accepting. ‘I am constantly reminded of the fact that I am not normal. But fortunately I have enough abnormal people around me to help me feel that it is actually OK.’

[heresince93]

Full transcript of Gillian’s Telegraph interview

Gillian Anderson is hard to pin down. Is she American or English? (Her accent slips between the two, depending on who she is talking to.) Guarded or warm? (She can be either, based on her mood.) Tough or vulnerable? (Or both?)

'‘Because my parents were American and we lived here in the UK, there was always a sense of not quite fitting in. Because of that I’ve always felt a bit of an outsider. I have perpetuated that because that is what feels familiar to me, it is what feels comfortable,’ she explains.

When we meet Anderson is English and warm, talking about the birthday parties she has to organise (she has three children, Piper, 24, Oscar, 12, and Felix, 10); and although she is very petite, wearing white patent stiletto boots and slender black trousers, she exudes the commanding charisma that makes her perfect for her imminent roles.

Rumour has it that she will be playing Margaret Thatcher in an upcoming series of The Crown, the Netflix series created and co-written by her partner, Peter Morgan. No one is confirming this, but no one is denying it either. 

Meanwhile, this month she stars in a new Netflix series, Sex Education, in which she plays a sex therapist who lives with her teenage son (Asa Butterfield). And in February Anderson has another plum role: Margo Channing in Belgian theatre director Ivo van Hove’s much-anticipated adaptation of All About Eve, also starring Lily James as Eve, with music by PJ Harvey.

The play – a modern reinterpretation of the 1950 film, which starred Bette Davis as Channing, a blazing Broadway star who is gradually supplanted by a younger rival – is about ambition and betrayal, femininity and anger, stardom and personal sacrifice.

Anderson’s is a bravura role, one that requires not just the cool intensity that we have come to expect from her, but also humour. Channing is deliciously droll, delivering endlessly quotable lines with comic precision (‘I’ll admit I may have seen better days, but I’m still not to be had for the price of a cocktail, like a salted peanut’).

‘A couple of years ago my boyfriend Pete said to me, “You know what would be a great role for you? Margo Channing,”’ Anderson says. ‘So I rewatched the film and I thought, “Oh my God, how much fun would that be!”’

Anderson, not one to wait for opportunity, discovered that theatre producer Sonia Friedman had the rights to the script and was working on it with van Hove – Cate Blanchett was set to be Channing. ‘So I thought, “Ah OK, I’ll just slink into the background.” Then my agents got a call to say that she [Blanchett] had backed out due to scheduling conflicts, and there was interest, and was I interested? So I was like, “Yes! When’s the meeting? Now?”’

Van Hove, on the phone from New York, is equally excited to be working with Anderson. ‘Margo needs someone who understands what the theatre is all about, someone who can carry a play, who can occupy the whole stage, and Gillian can do that; she is a fabulous theatre actress. Although, of course, she became iconic for me in the 1990s when she was in The X-Files.’

There is something a little surprising about Ivo van Hove, an avant-garde director celebrated for his reinterpretations of plays and operas such as Hedda Gabler, Antigone and Lulu, professing fandom for a mid-’90s sci-fi series; but that is to forget the huge cultural impact of The X-Files, its quality and its ingenuity.

The series was about two FBI agents, played by Anderson and David Duchovny, who attempt to unravel various natural and supernatural mysteries. No one expected it to become such a success, least of all Anderson, who was 24 when she was cast in the show. It was her first major role and it made her a star.

She won multiple awards for her portrayal of the sceptical Dr Dana Scully, including an Emmy and a Golden Globe. But such stardom often involves sacrifice and Anderson was suffering.

The production schedule for The X-Files was brutal, involving 16-hour days for nine months of the year. Furthermore, in 1994, aged 25, Anderson married Clyde Klotz, assistant art director on the series, and nine months later she gave birth to their daughter, Piper. After three years she and Klotz divorced. It was while she was pregnant that Anderson started having severe panic attacks.

‘I was having them daily,’ she explains, experiencing palpitations, numbness, ‘hallucinations, all of it’. Things didn’t get better once Piper was born. ‘I was a young mother, and shortly after that we were separating, and I was working these crazy hours. I remember periods of time when I was just crying, my make-up was being done over and over again and I was not able to stop crying.’

Anderson sought solace in meditation. ‘I went to somebody and there was a meditation we did together. We went to some quite dark places and I got to see that I could still survive those dark places, I was stronger than they were, and after that the panic attacks stopped.’

Anderson had been having panic attacks, on and off, ‘since high school’. As a teenager she was a daydreamer and a troublemaker who felt different from her peers in Michigan because of her childhood in Harringay, having left the ‘incy-bincy flat with a bathroom outside’ that she and her parents lived in when she was 11 years old, when her family moved back to the US.

‘I started falling in with groups and trying to fit in, until it got to the point when it was like, “I don’t f—ing want to fit in. I want to look completely different to all of you, and stop staring at me because I have a mohawk.” I’d shave the sides of my head with a razor blade and dye my hair different colours.’

Anderson’s parents, Rosemary and Ed, were living in Chicago and were both just 26 when she was born. Soon afterwards the family moved to London so Ed could attend film school, while Rosemary worked as a computer programmer.

‘My parents were working very hard and would often work late. I have lots of memories of playing by myself in the back garden and searching for friends in the neighbourhood because I didn’t have siblings.’

After moving back to America, Rosemary and Ed had two more children, a son and a daughter. Anderson admits that her adolescent waywardness might have been related to the arrival of two new babies in the house. ‘I made trouble and I got attention that way.’

Acting is another way to get attention, something Anderson learnt early on. ‘I remember being in a play when I was in primary school. I was meant to be a Chelsea fan. I started chewing gum on stage and blowing bubbles and got all the attention. I thought, “This is all right, everybody is watching me!”’

But when she reached 16 and started doing more professional productions in America, performing became fundamentally important to her. ‘I enjoyed the connection between performer and audience, the control. And I remember thinking, “I can do this. They are showing me I can do this.”

'It changed everything in my life, knowing I could do something. Prior to that there hadn’t been that moment yet when I found purpose and direction.’

Anderson decided that she wanted to pursue acting as a career and was accepted at The Theatre School at DePaul University in Chicago. ‘From the very start of school I didn’t go into the dorms, instead I found an apartment with a roommate in a funky neighbourhood. I was the only one who was living out of school. That is my pattern, carving my own thing.

'All through [theatre] school I dressed like I was a member of The Cure. That was how I was in the world, grungy, not considered, not mature. I was forthright and gutsy – I drove myself to Chicago in my dad’s VW van – but slightly falling apart.’

She always knew she would return to England. ‘My childhood here, the smell of north London, it has such a massive tug on me. I really felt, when we moved to the States, that I would eventually have a life back here.’

She and Piper moved to the city after The X-Files ended its original run, and she went on to have two more children, Oscar and Felix, with her now ex-boyfriend, businessman Mark Griffiths (there was also a marriage to British documentary maker Julian Ozanne, which lasted for two years, with the couple separating in 2006).

In the UK Anderson’s career developed in a way that might not have been expected for the golden girl of ’90s sci-fi. She took juicy roles in big-budget period dramas – Lady Dedlock in Bleak House, Miss Havisham in Great Expectations – and appeared on stage, at the Royal Court and the Donmar Warehouse. But it was her performance in the BBC detective drama The Fall, starting in 2013, that solidified her reputation as the go-to actor for female characters who are charismatic and powerful.

Anderson, as DSI Stella Gibson, was imperious in her white silk shirts and high heels, unwavering in her pursuit of the serial killer played by Jamie Dornan. The screenwriter Allan Cubitt created the role of Gibson with Anderson in mind. ‘I wanted Gibson to be an enigmatic figure. Gillian is a riveting actress, but there is an aloofness to her as well. Also I was attempting to reclaim the idea of the powerful femme fatale, without the fatale; someone who is aware that her beauty can be used to help her ends. That she is unafraid of that was radical.’

Anderson was deeply involved in the creation of Gibson’s look, altering the way she thought about herself in the process. ‘What fascinated me about her, and I feel that we were able to find that in the costume design, was that the way she dressed never felt like it was for anyone else but her. I don’t think I have necessarily changed the way I dress since her, but I feel like I am certainly more conscious of what I wear and what it says.’

As a younger woman her style was ‘messy, like a discarded urchin’. She would wear oversized suits and ‘floppy dresses that I had probably stolen from the thrift store’. Whereas now her look is sleek, and she favours brands like Jil Sander, Prada and Dries Van Noten.

The Fall was about gender, power and desire; and it was while filming it in Belfast that Anderson began thinking more about the struggles that women face in the 21st century. ‘I was reading all these statistics about young girls being suicidal and having such low self-esteem and I thought, “Surely, given everything that we know, and the fact we are all having these feelings, can we not start a conversation about whether we want this and how to deal with it?”’

This morphed into her writing a book, We: A Manifesto for Women Everywhere, with her friend, the writer and activist Jennifer Nadel, in 2017. Alternating between pieces by Anderson and Nadel, it details their own personal struggles, and includes practical sections on how to deal with issues such as anxiety and low self-esteem using practices such as meditation, affirmations and gratitude lists.

‘We both know how it feels to be in emotional pain,’ says Nadel. ‘Both of us have felt lost, and found a spiritual way out. Both of us have experienced radical transformation as a result of the things that we wrote about in that book.’ 

Cubitt and Nadel each say that among the most impressive things about Anderson, as a collaborator, are her focus and drive.

‘I have never met anyone with Gillian’s ability to focus. And she has a certainty about things, she is not mired in indecision,’ says Nadel. What this means is not just an incredibly long CV, but numerous satellite projects. Anderson has a line of smart, grown-up clothes that she has developed with the brand Winser London (‘I didn’t realise I was so opinionated about buttons!’).

She also works for numerous charities, focusing especially on women’s rights and environmental issues. ‘Because of my work ethic and also having had such high expectations, both of myself and other people’s of me, at such a young age, I think it became near to impossible for me to relax at all, to do anything that wasn’t work-related, so a lot of my later adult life has been trying to force myself to do that, and I struggle so hard, and sometimes I lose sight of it. So there is a part of me that wonders if I am slightly addicted [to work], I learnt it so young.’

The scant spare time that Anderson allows herself is spent ‘going to the cinema, to the theatre, watching documentaries’.

Piper, who has just completed a degree in production and costume design, is now living in her mother’s basement, and the two of them recently went on a trip to Amsterdam to see van Hove’s four-hour stage adaptation of the Hanya Yanagihara novel A Little Life. That might not sound like everyone’s cup of tea, but Anderson loved it.

And despite all the seriousness and the self-examination (or perhaps because of it), she is good company, thoughtful and witty. She has, she says, got happier as she has got older, less self-critical, more self-accepting.

‘I am constantly reminded of the fact that I am not normal. But fortunately I have enough abnormal people around me to help me feel that it is actually OK.’

All About Eve is running at the Noël Coward Theatre from 2 February to 11 May 2019

[livelivefastfree]

100% need a masterpost of your fics cause you've been drawing them and I love everything. But recs would be appreciated too!!

ALRIGHTY THEN.  One……VERY large post of my fics and my Motorcity recs, coming up.  ^v^  50+ fics for y’all’s consumption.

Let’s start with my fics, because I know them better, haha.

–

Save A Horse, Ride A Dragon

One of my fav fics I’ve done to date in any fandom.  Mike is a mercenary dragon trapped in the shape of a human, wandering the Michigan wastes in post-apocalyptic magical America, when he and his Burners get an offer from the mysterious Lord Vanquisher.  T+ at this point for suggestive moments and makeouts. Polyburners/Muckles.  Warnings for the Duke being The Worst, and for Mike being the DUMBEST oblivious thirst-lizard.

The Officer Present//Director Absent series (AKA Live Free and Welcome To The Kane Co Family)

A love letter to the Season 2 that never was, co-written by me and my twin sister toastyhat/HeatedHeadwear!  :D  Live Free chronicles the appearance of a new, menacing super-soldier in Motorcity, the shadowy machinations that led to his appearance and an overarching plan from Kane that could destroy Motorcity–once and for all!!!!!!  Welcome to the Kane Co Family starts shortly after the fallout from the first, with both cities struggling to come to terms with their new reality–but the world is changing and there are new threats on all sides, and if they thought their status quo changed in the first fic, BOY THEY’VE GOT A BIG STORM COMING!! >8Dc  Also Julie punches multiple people and generally kicks ass, it’s fabulousBoth fics are gen, they’re both rated T+ for violence, Evil Science, angst, etc.  Warnings for copious Deluxe worldbuilding, egregious amounts of backstory, a couple OCs I’ve been reliably informed are extremely fun, and chapter titles in the style of anime episode titles, because why not.  :D

Supersynesthesiac

Originally created solely to fill a prompt from a sexy prompt generator, this fic and the world it’s set in both spiralled wildly out of control, and a much more plot-heavy sequel is in the works.  Supersynesthesiac follows Mike Chilton, a vigilante superhero in Detroit Of The Future, as he finally meets his elusive, telepathic partner Blonde Thunder under the most dramatic circumstances possible.  Rated M for psychic makeouts, mind-melding and also there’s sex happening, probably.  It’s not nearly as lovingly described as the mind-meld porn going on in the foreground.  Polyburners is happening in the background, but this fic is basically entirely Muckles.  Warnings for Red being awful.

Rest In Pieces (Come Apart)

Mike is getting entirely out of control, and needs to burn off energy before he can get himself (and everybody else) in trouble again.  Fortunately his gang has a Plan.Rated M for sweet, loving and totally relentless polyburners gangbang.  Warnings for everybody being absolute dorks.  Also bondage and edging, if that’s not your thing. UoU

Werewolves Of Detroit

A series of vignettes exploring the world of Mike Chilton, rogue ex-commander werewolf, his vampire best friend, his highly unconventional pack, and the world they live in. EVERY section is illustrated and I’m very proud.Rated T+, mostly gen with mentions of Dutch/Tennie.  Warnings for Kane being a huge bigot, mentions of KaneCo-mandated surgery, and Texas being an asshole about vampires.   

Exposure Therapy 

Mike has a cool idea for a cool present for his cool boyfriend to totally cure Chuck’s fear of going fast in Mutt.  Rated M for dumb, fluffy smut and implied sex toys.  Warnings for unsafe driving practices.

Kiss And Tell

Somebody came into my askbox and suggested polyburners–but the rest of the city doesn’t know that’s their relationship, just that SOME configuration of Burners is together, and it seems to change CONSTANTLY.   Rated T+ for vaguely-implied possible sex at some point off-screen.  Warnings for nothing, this fic is a perfect warm fluffy representation of my poly-burner feelings and I love it.

Wreck

A little snapshot from an AU I’m not really planning to flesh out–I mostly wanted to capture a certain kind of bittersweet emotional conflict.  Chuck’s doing his best to keep his head down and live through college when a face he hasn’t seen since The Accident shows up at his door.  Vaguely Muckles-ish.  Rated T+ for reference to a nasty car accident and the aftermath, warnings for Kane being, just, Not A Good Dad.  

Override 0

Not exactly an AU, more of a speculative fic about the Burners finding out that Chuck’s enhancements go a lot further than just the weapons systems in his arms.  A realization prompted, of course, by the Duke of Detroit’s thirst for drama.  T+, no pairings.  Warnings for, in the words of AO3′s tag system, “#Loss Of Limbs”, mind control via brain-hacking, and mentions of unethical scientific/surgical procedures.

So Real In The Dark

I challenged myself to write people pining for each other while simultaneously being in a relationship, and a sci-fi AU with an artificial amnesia hookup service turned out to be the solution.  Half a fic about boys being incredibly dumb, and half a fic about trauma, bigotry, coping mechanisms and communication, and how you can love somebody and know them incredibly well and still not really understand them.  Explicit, Muckles, background Dutch/Tennie and Claire/Julie.  Warnings for brief stranger danger, aphrodisiacs, more poor treatment of cyborgs, and emotional gut-punch.

 –Stuff I Post About That Isn’t Posted/Finished Yet–

Burnerswap

A universe where the Burners are grown-up villains, and the former villains of the canon series are our new teenage heroes.  They’re dysfunctional and weird, but they’re doing their best to protect the clean, orderly, shining city of Deluxe from the gangs and bots and nasty, climbing bots that Ms. Kane sends up from the city below.  UoU  Likely to be rated T+ if I ever post it. Not much in the way of pairings except Ms. Kane’s right and left-hand man are VERY married and VERY tragic because you know I gotta fit Muckles in there.  

–Collab Fic / Gift Fic–

Chilton 2.0 by me and LaughingStones

The Kane Co. super-soldier program needs a volunteer, and who better to be superhumanly enhanced than the rising star of the Security program, Commander Chilton?  He’d never betray Kane Co, or need to have his brain overridden!  There’s no way this project can possibly go wrong!  Rated M for some pretty fucked-up treatment of cyborgs, and also for sexy future reasons. Warnings for Mike getting really messed up physically, emotionally and psychologically by bad programming and free-will overrides, and also for dumb boys stumbling awkwardly through impromptu sex-ed together.  Muckles.

i’m not the same kid from your memory by roachpatrol and also I helped

Kane Co. captures Chuck and manages to do some nasty shit to his brain before the Burners come and re-capture him.  Chuck does NOT appreciate being held captive by Burner Scum.  Emotions!!! Angst!!!!!  …it’s rated T+ on AO3 but there’s sex so just, be aware of that.  UoU  Muckles!

Experiments In Cross-Species Makeouts by LaughingStones

This one is very hard to explain, because Jem and I like to bounce of each other’s AUs and fics and write derivative fics of fics–there’s an OC in the Live Free/Welcome To The Kane Co Family universe who has what is essentially a nasty brainy kismessisitude/hate-love relationship (not fully explored in the fic, but very fleshed out in my mind, haha) with Chuck.  And this is….those two, but with the races/species from Werewolves of Detroit.  So…supernatural AU Chuck/OC hate-sex.  M, obviously.  Warnings for vampires getting drunk on siren blood and Live Free/WttKCF spoilers.

Recalibration Nation by HeatedHeadwear

!!!! A fic for my picture of Chuck as the Duke’s cyborg bodyguard, because toasty is great.  A+ hurt/comfort and recovery and bittersweet life-goes-on vibe, aslkfjsadf I love it.  T+, no pairings, warnings for anxiety/panic attacks, ear trauma, violence, emotions.

Proper Disposal Of Project Materials by LaughingStones

A scene in Chilton 2.0 I didn’t get to write; Chuck is a Failed Project, and Kane Co. has no used for Failed Projects.  Fortunately, the techs he grew up working with have his back.  T+ for (yet again) unethical treatment of cyborgs.  

Making Friends The Superhero Way by LaughingStones

Set before Supersynesthesiac; Mike’s good at his superhero job, but sometimes everybody needs help.  In this case, help just happens to have cat ears.  Gen, rated G.  Warnings for trouble breathing and also Mike being a doofus.

The Space Shenanigans series by LaughingStones and roachpatrol 

Loosely related to/based on the Forget Me Not, but set much later.  I’m not sure FMN is going to be poly or not, but these fics are inspired-by, so they go in this section. :D  The various sexy shenanigans of space-captain Mike, cyborg Chuck and Julie the terrifying space princess.  M for sexy shenanigans.  Warnings for (acted/fake) dubcon for the benefit of an asshole, and…..just various sexual shenanigans, I would check the warnings on the fics, haha.  :D

–Aaaaaand some non-me recs!–

(((I’m going to have to speed through these a little bit more, but I love them also, this post is just getting VERY long)))

All Steamed Up by Gumbridge 

Gen, G: coffeeshop AU, technically. Chuck would REALLY like a new espresso machine, he has done the MATH, it’s GOOD BUSINESS, MIKE!!!!!

Artificial Nocturne by Icka M. Chif (mischif)

Gen, T+: Mike accidentally trespasses on the territory of a mysterious guy who calls himself “Hound”.  Mike immediately sets about pushing past the emotional barrier of standoffishness and the physical barrier of giant, repurposed KaneCo HOUNDbots, and ends up with two awesome new friends out of the deal.  (The “Chuck is a constantly-terrified badass with an army of bots” AU)

Atlas and Copernicus by charcoalmink

Gen, G: A piece about how Kane can think of Mike and Julie both as his children, but feel so completely different about them.  Hurts so good, ahhh ToT

Behind The Throne by intravenusann

Duke/No. 2, Explicit: Number 2 would never really leave.  But sometimes it’s nice to be reminded why she stays.  

Bittersweet by EnsignCelery

Gen, G: Sometimes they get stressed.  Sometimes you just gotta lie down and cuddle.

Chicken Soup For The Burner Soul by renquise

Gen, G: Mike’s immunity boosters start to wear off and he goes down like a tree.  Good old-fashioned soft sickfic hurt/comfort.

Constantinople And Timbuktu / By(zantine) Any Other Name by (orphan_account)

Mike/Chuck, G: oh my god, this fic is strange to explain but so fun?? Historical AU–Chuck’s an orphan who ended up a body-double for russian royalty in like 1500, until he ends up kind of ambiguously kidnapped by a Tatar horseman who doesn’t speak his language but has a really nice smile and a fun come-and-go family of other riders from other countries.  In the words of the author, “ [the Russian nomad!au] “

Degreaser by Gumbridge

Claire/Julie, T+: Claire can tolerate getting dirty down in Motorcity, but it has to be under the right circumstances. Julie provides those circumstances.

I Thought You Were Dead by Caligraphunky

Gen, G: Jacob thought all the androids he created for KaneCo were scrapped.  But here’s unit CHUCK, back again.

In The Lost Age Where The Jewels Hide by roachpatrol and LaughingStones

Chuck (Lord Vanquisher)/Mike (Smiling Dragon), Explicit:  The LARPing group plays WAY crazier games than Mike is used to, but he could really get used to in-character Never Have I Ever if it always ends with stuff like this.  WOW.  Sex is GREAT.

Loaded Up And Truckin’ by RaccoonDoom 

Gen, T+: Smokey And The Bandit AU–AKA Jacob has a truck and uses it to run illegal goods; Mike and Chuck run interference and keep the cops off his tail.  Trucker AU, heyyyy. :D

Love Free by Prim_the_Amazing 

Multi/Polyburners, G: KaneCo has the algorithms, the expertise, they determine the most perfect possible partner.  So what do you do when the person KaneCo chooses isn’t the person you wanted?

Never Quite Thought We Could Lose It All by LaughingStones

Mike/Chuck, Explicit: It’s not weird for a KaneCo tech to have a huge blank spot in their memory, but it is unusual for one of their childhood friends to show up at their cubicle dressed as a physical relief technician, looking stressed and desperate and acting like Chuck should know him.  Warning for implied/referenced noncon.

The Obligatory Fantasy AU series by LaughingStones 

Mike/Chuck, G/T: Chuck’s a Mage On A Mission, and he’s not going to be derailed by the fact that his bodyguard is definitely a dragon who definitely considers Chuck his beautiful, golden-haired treasure.

our guts can’t be reworked by roachpatrol

Mike/Julie, Chuck/Mike, T+: Mike finds out he’s bisexual in the most confusing possible way: BODY-SWITCHING.  

Pyrrhic Victory by Clementine

Mike/Chuck, G: I live for Mike and Chuck LARPing dramatic emotional scenes and being dumb, dorky boys and that’s what this is, and I LOVE it. 

Quiet by deanon

Mike/Chuck, Explicit:  Mike makes the mistake of wondering about Chuck and sex and being noisy, and get catapulted abruptly into terrible, flustered pining.

Quit or Retry by Caligraphunky

Gen, T+: a really short but really nicely done piece that slowly illuminates more and more of a single scene until you get the full picture.  fear. android Chuck.

Riding Shotgun by Oisiflaneur

Polyburners, T+: I’ve never smoked pot but I’m all for the Burners hanging around being chill and kissing and occasionally also Mike does shotguns and people make out.

rise if you’re sleeping (stay awake) by RaccoonDoom 

Gen, T+: Another cyborg fic, this time about Mike and Chuck and insomnia and nightmares.  Sweet hurt-comfort. UwU

Rule Number Eight by drown (teii) 

Chuck/Texas, Chuck->Mike, T+:  the fic that got me into Chuxas–starting with the aftermath of one-sided Chuck/Mike and chronicling Chuck’s descent into weird, Texas-related madness. 

Scars by corelton

Claire/Julie, G:  Julie’s line of work puts her in enough danger for her to actually have scars, like, old-fashioned scars from actual injuries.  Claire is fascinated by them.

searchlights in the parking lots of hell by roachpatrol

Gen, T+: I don’t know if it sounds like a compliment to say this is one of the most subtly, gorgeously horrifying fics I’ve ever read, but that’s basically how I feel.  Mike is a kid in a cyborg program, and he keeps ending up in sparring matches with the same kid, over and over again; it’s a different kind of unsettling every time.  There’s something about seeing a scenario that’s obviously intensely messed up, through the point of view of a character who thinks it’s normal and good.  It gives it a special, extra punch.  

Sex Level: Texas! by LaughingStones

Texas->Mike, Texas->Burners, Explicit: Texas has some totally cool and sexy thoughts–mostly about Mike.  WHAT?  It’s not like it's weird.   

Spend Life Fighting For Your Sanity by roachpatrol 

Dutch/Tennie, T+: Deluxe has no patience for rebel scum, free-thinkers or artists.  Unfortunately for Dutch’s continued health and well-being, he’s all of those things.  Even if he can’t really remember what he did.  AKA: Deluxe re-captures Dutch and comprehensively fucks him up, but SUCK IT you can’t take away the colors in his SOUL.  

Sprouts by renquise

Gen, G:  a fic about Dutch finding ROTH, and Dutch and Chuck becoming ROTH’s weird programmer dads.  ROTH is adorable and the characterization is great, A++ 

Test Drive by renquise 

Mike/Julie, Explicit: Julie and Mike have a fun adventure in pegging together. 

thursday’s child has far to go (and they go so very, very quickly) by thinkingCAPSLOCK

Gen, G:  Kane loses one child, but at least he still has the other.

Walls Twice As Strong by deanon

Mike/Chuck, T+:  in the words of the original summary: “When Mike and Chuck fight, everybody knows.“ 

We Are Golden by renquise

Polyburners, T+:  Mike kisses everybody, and it’s soft and good and makes my heart feel all happy. 

We Can’t Punch Good: A Love Story by heartsinhay

Dutch/Texas, T+: Texas is pretty sure Dutch has just gotten immune to Texas’s sweet Texas Moves, but that’s okay.  Texas has got more than one trick up his sleeve, and he knows what Dutch likes.  Probably

yellow highway lines (that you’re relying on to lead you home) by renquis

Gen, G:  A delicious exploration of the world that might exist outside the dome, and also THE BURNER ROADTRIP FIC YOU’VE BEEN WAITING FOR.  The kids take a package from Rayon and go on the road, headed for San Fran come hell or nuclear superstorm.This is one of the first Motorcity fics I read, and It’s a big part of why I started making things for this fandom in the first place. :D  Very recommend, A++

[mangled-dreams]

Flower Ring

Another vomit of words. I seem to be doing a lot of word vomit stories, and here’s another featuring Anti X Reader.

Growing u in a split household proved to be interesting when you were a child. You’d spend the school year with your mother in the United States, on long breaks and for summer you’d stay with your father in Ireland. It was like living two separate lives that still intermingled. It was and still is fabulous.

Thanks to your father you are a duel American-Irish citizen.

You’ve seen other families try to manage a split house with very little success. Your parents however are amazing. Even though you have to travel over the Atlantic ocean in order to see your dad on a regular basis you can’t ever pinpoint a time your mother, or father, complained about the trouble. Your planned visitations started when you were six and able to understand what was going on.

You honestly thank you parents for being so cool with the whole thing.  Your mom would fly over and drop you off with your dad. She’d even change her flights if you were have a particularly bad time being left behind. Despite having so much distance between them your parents co-parented very well. Consistency between the households really helped shape you into a proper young lady and well rounded person.

And, yes, you loved your mixed background, the way you were raised, and all the unique experiences only this kind of situation could give you, you’re thankful for your childhood because it gave you Anti. He still is your single most favorite memory. You’re not sure what exactly he was, but he was kind to you and kept you well entertained—even if it were in a naughty in way of mischief.

You always looked forward to going to Ireland to see your family and to see Anti. He always had something new for you to do each time you went home. He’d make you a promise to see each other again each time you left until he just didn’t show up anymore.

Thinking about it, even now, makes your heart ache a little. Even though he was different, and most likely of the fray you really did love him. A girlish crush--that still to this day has not dissipated. Staring out the rain covered window in your apartment you can still see Anti standing just inside the trees the lined your dad’s property wearing the biggest grin you’d ever seen. It looked painful, but mixed with the glitter of happiness in his eyes you doubt it hurt him.

You wonder what he looks like now. He’s probably tall with slightly curly dark brown hair and the same brilliant blue eyes with the left eye that sometimes changed color. You sigh lowering your gaze. You know it doesn’t do you any good to dwell on the past.

No matter how many times you went back to search for him, you never found any trace of Anti after your fourteenth birthday. Frowning again you curl your hands into fists, bunching your shirt between your hand and fingers. It’s because of that stupid promise you made all those years ago that you can’t get the boy out of your mind no matter how hard you’d try.

So, you stopped trying to forget him. You put away the pretty flower ring he’d crafted before your eyes when you were ten and tried to move on. However, moving on his hard when you can’t seem to shake yourself of Anti’s memory.

“Why do you do this?” Jase asks, shouts really at you. You feel numb to his loud voice; to the way he tries to intimidate you into submission. You’ve been dating for almost a year and yet it feels like an eternity of torture. You need to cut him loose.

“Jase, if you don’t like how I am then leave. I’ve been through this too many times to try and stick it out. You obviously don’t want to try and understand how I feel and I don’t have the patience to explain it.” You tell him feeling alone again. You hate this feeling and part of you has actually gotten used to it, but it’s not what you really want.

Jase stares at you as if you’ve grown a third head. “I fucking knew it! You’re still waiting to see if that fucker from Ireland will sweep you off your fucking feet.”

Okay, now that strikes a nerve. You don’t talk about Anti with anyone, and you mean no one. Standing up from your small perch you glare up at Jase. The quickest way to get a reaction out of you is to talk about Anti and that’s only because it would mean Jase went through your private books. “I told you Jase; never touch my books. How dare you think you have any right to go through my thing?” You explode, there is very little another person can do to make you this angry.

“See! You show more emotion for some guy you met when you were a child than for your own boyfriend!” Jase responds in kind, matching your volume.

“Not any more you’re not! I don’t ask you for a lot, Jason, but when I do I expect there to be some level of respect. Apparently you don’t feel like you should respect my wishes so do me a favor and leave.” You snap heated by Jase’s clear disregard for your privacy.

Jase stares down at you, flabbergasted by your strong reaction. “Really, that little shit still gets this kind of reaction from you? It’s been over twelve Goddamn years, Y/n, let it go and move on!” Jase shouts back at you.

His words might as well have been his hand cross your face. You can’t help the look of hurt from showing on your face. “Get out, Jase. I am telling you to get out of my house.” You growl out when you’ve recovered. “You have no right to talk about thinks you know nothing about.”

“You’ll regret this. Your precious Anti will never show up.” Jase spits at you, his words like venom as he snatches up his jacket and leaves you apartment, slamming the door behind him.

You last just a few seconds longer before the tears drip down your cheeks. You hate the crushing loneliness that accompanies another failed relationship. It’s your own fault, you know that. Holding on to the false hope that Anti will reappear is killing you. No one else measures up to the man you think Anti would be if you saw him today.

An hour later you lie down on your bed and look at the plane ticket in your hand. Jason wasn’t completely correct. It’s been fifteen years almost to the day. You’ve had this ticket ordered for a year and this time tomorrow you’ll be in Glasgow, Ireland touching down and being greeted by your father.

In four days it will mark the fifteenth year you and Anti made your sacred promise. In four days you’ll go back to your promised meeting place and see if Anti appears. In four days you’ll know if all your hopes and dreams, and if all these years of waiting will pay off or if you’ll be left with a broken heart yet again.

With a sigh you roll to your side and put the ticket on your nightstand. You don’t know why you hold on to this silly promise but you do. You want it to be real—for Anti to be real. Reaching above your head you take the hand stitched Anti plushy of your design and curl into yourself. Your flight leaves at ten tonight and you still have a few things to pack but for a few more minutes you’ll lay with your doll and dream.

Beyond your vision Anti stares through the window pane, his gaze the softest it’s been in a long time. He’d been waiting for the bastard you’d been snogging to get his arse kicked. He knew the guy was no good, but it hadn’t been confirmed until Anti had seen him hanging all over another girl and knew it was the time to strike.

To the idiot’s credit he did feel guilty but his guilt manifested as blame and suspicion fell on you. All Anti had to do was feed those embers of doubt until they exploded in a fiery blaze. He does, however feel horrible that you’d been put through such a scene, but in a few short hours you’ll be back in Ireland and in his arms.

Yes, Anti has been keeping an eye on you ever since the day he was forced from you; but a demon has to go through their own growing up. He knew from the beginning he wouldn’t be able to stay, to continue to win your affections through fair means. No, it was a desperate attempt on his side when he suggested the pact, the promise that’s followed you. If single, even after fifteen years, you’d meet again at your secret spot and marry each other.

Watching you from a safe distance and with a little bit of magic Anti smiles. You almost over sleep from your nap and are now rushing about your apartment, hurrying to finish your checklist. He already knows you plan to be in Ireland for almost a month this time, something you hadn't told your now ex.

Almost as if knowing where he is you look out your window, your gaze piercing through his invisible form. It takes Anti a brief moment to remember you can't actually see him and relaxes. He waits until your mother shows up to take you the airport, taking his leave once you've locked up your door.

If all goes as planned you'll be moving to Ireland and you'll give up this small apartment.

"Safe trip dear." Your mother says hugging you tightly. You smile hugging her back.

"Thanks mom. Let Mason know I say bye." You respond looking at the chart of flights entering and exiting the airport. "I should get going. I love you." You tell your mother kissing her cheek before removing yourself from her grasp. Walking up to the counter you check in your large luggage bag and exchange your ticket before heading to the security check line.

You make it through the line in record time due to the time of night and walk peacefully to your gate. There is a small group of people already at the gate sprinkled here and there, a few couples paired together. You take a seat near the terminal tunnel and pullout your tablet, connect to the WiFi, and browse the internet.

When your flight is taxied into the terminal you wait for the few people disembarking to exit and pack your things up again. It take about twenty minutes but soon allowed to board and find you seat. To your surprise the plane is rather full but you find your seat in the middle row at the front of the plane with no other seats taken.

Storing your bag under your seat you put your leg through the handle and turn your phone off taking out the sim card and replace it with one you know will work in Ireland once you've bought minutes for it. Buckling yourself in you people watch as the few others that had been waiting with you board and find their seat. Many look tired as worn, a few kids bouncing with excitement.

Smiling to yourself close your eyes and settle into a light sleep waking only when the plane lifts off and then again when you go in for landing many-many hours later. For having a very turbulent flight over the Atlantic you slept pretty decently waking feeling refreshed. After disembarking and gathering your luggage you head to the loading and unloading area.

" A ghrá!" Your father shouts bear hugging you tightly. It's been over a year since your last visit. Your smile is bright and warm as you gladly accept your dad's hug. For his age he's still very strong and spry.

"DA! I missed you!" You shout kissing his scruffy cheek. Your slight Irish accent getting thicker. You consciously dilute your accent and choice in words for your normal day to day activities in America just for the sake of not having to repeat yourself.

"Aye, lass, 'tis good to see you again. Come, come, le's get us home." Your dad says ushering you to his beat up Volvo. Despite the worn out coloring and dents you love this beat up old car.

"I see the ewes have been treating the ol' car with care." Beside you your father chuckles and you both talk about recent changes in the area and family that have moved away, marriages, births, and even deaths since your last visit.

"Awe, Mr. Walsh passed? That's sad. How long?"

"Sad indeed. His tribute is this weekend. Do you want to pay respects?"

Nodding quietly you look out the rolling landscape. Mr. Walsh's death really weighs on your heart. You loved the old man like a granddad. He always believed your stories about Anti, feeding you folk lore and tales of the fey. You'll miss the aged man with a kind smile and some of the best home brewed hard cider you've ever tasted.

"He left behind a will." You glance at your father with confusion. "He left you his prize possession."

Raising a brow you glance at your dad again. "His prize possession?" you echo.

You dad smiles. "He left you his recipe for his famous hard cider."

You smile to yourself at his words. Mr. Walsh had always joked he'd think about coming back from the grave to tell you before moving on to the Great Beyond.

"'Ey!" your various cousins, aunts, uncles, and neighbors cry when you come down from unpacking your thing. You smile and make your rounds, talking, joking, laughing with familiar faces. A few of the older women ask when you'll be married off and start your own family.

Your answers remain vague at best. Refusing to give any kind of solid answer since you still have 3 days to find the promised spot and see if Anti shows up. By the time everyone is at a point you can slip away it's about midnight.

Taking a flashlight, a pack with a few supplies, and a light jacket you walk behind your house and cross the small meadow to the lining of trees. Even in the darkness you know exactly where you're going. You find yourself really only using the light to look at the foliage and wild life skidding away from you.

It takes the better part of a half hour, mainly because you stopped to look at mist covered spider webs and bird nests, but your find your promised space and look around the small cottage you and Anti had built.

Each time you come back to Ireland you clean up the cottage and fix it up a little bit at a time to accommodate an older and slightly taller you. Taking out a few things from your pack you clean up the cobwebs and flooring before unrolling a light fleece blanket and sit down on the bench Anti had crafted.

You don't expect him to show up tonight. Part of you doesn't really believe Anti will every show up and yet here you are. Pulling a bottle of water you open it and take a few drinks before relaxing to the sounds of the forest.

You missed Ireland far more than you realized. Within just a few minutes you find yourself drifting in and out of consciousness. One night's sleep in the little cottage won't hurt you, but it isn't encouraged.

"Ah, what a sweet bonnie lass sleepin' in such a lonely place." A fairly high pitched male voice chuckles bringing you back to a conscious state.

Fear isn't your first reaction. There are very few people in this small town that you don't know and that would think to hurt you. Rubbing your eyes you focus on the man before you. In the darkness you can just barely make out a athletic build--more of a sprinter than a footballer, but tall, taller than yourself, with green hair atop his head.

"My da always did tell me to be polite and introduce myself when meeting someone new." You respond completely sure you've never met this man before, but even as you continue to stare at him--trying to discover him, you feel a sense of familiarity about him. "The name's Y/n. Are you from this area?" You ask standing up.

The man chuckles under his breath and in a flash of brilliant green energy the cottage lights up, illuminating the man's face. You stand in shock at the display of other worldly magic before letting your gaze settle on the man's face. Your gasp is audible in the silent space.

"You came." You manage to whisper in both fear and relief.

"Aye. I told you I'd be here waiting." Anti says with a Cheshire cat grin. There isn't a pinpoint place you can put your finger, but this adult Anti is off.

Watching him you can see bits and pieces of that young boy you'd fallen head over heels in love with, and for the first time reality crashes around you. You don't really know this person, this creature anymore. Thinking for a moment you ask, “What have you been doing all these years? I’ve come back before looking for you. Why did you just vanish?”

Anti sighs audibly, he crosses the small cottage to a small square table you’d found a long time ago and sits on the edge of it. You watch him gauge the weight the table will take before looking at you. “I am sorry about that.”

You frown at him. He feels guilty, that’s obvious. “What happened?”

“I had to leave. There was no way around it.” Anti tells you. Your frown doesn’t leave your face. That’s not really an explanation. Anti chuckles at your expression. “I knew you’d want a better talkin’.”

You nod your head. “Anti, you left without a proper goodbye. I haven’t been able to find you anywhere. I gathered as a child you weren’t completely human, but it still hurt that you just vanished.” You say softly sitting down not quite sure when exactly you’d gotten to your feet.

Anti nods. “I know. Believe me when I say it wasn’t my idea. I’m not human, aye, but that doesn’t make the time we had together any less meaningful. I had to leave because of… I’ll say family business. Just as you were hitting puberty I was going through my own version of it. I had to be taken away for the safety of others and to learn how to keep myself under control.”

“What are you?” You ask. You never asked him before.

Anti smiles. “I’m known as many things, a demon, a creature of the fey… devil; but, no matter the name, I would not hurt you.” Anti tells you, his expression serious as he speaks. “I left to protect you. Our promise was my goodbye, so that you’d remember me.”

“You left to protect me? We’re you that dangerous?” You ask softly sitting down despite never actually remembering when you stood up. Looking around the small cottage you watch tiny glowing orbs dance on the wind. Despite feeling like you’re in the Twilight Zone it feels pretty normal.

Anti nods again. “My… powers, abilities can be affected by mood, strong emotions like love, jealousy, anger; it fuels them—makes them unpredictable when first learning to control them.  Even the elders can have difficulty controlling their power if there limits are tested.”

“How do you know if you can control yourself now?” You ask seriously.

Anti doesn’t respond right away instead thinking over his answer rather than blurting out he has absolute control over himself. Watching you move on over the years had given him a lot of real world practice. He’s not going to admit how many times he’d lost to his own battle of wills, his powers going haywire at the sight of you wrapped up in another man’s arms.

“I have put myself through many tests.” Anti finally says watching you carefully—blissfully ignorant to his own personal hell. Anti knows he was very close, a couple of times to losing you forever. He’ll never tell you out loud the small ways he brought out the demons hidden deep in the few males you’d been wholeheartedly interested in. He’d seen the men for what they truly were. To him, he was saving you from future heartache.

With a low sigh you look away from Anti, your gaze settling on the bag you’d brought with you. “I still have that flower ring you made me.” You offer quietly. “I had it pressed so it wouldn’t wilt.”

“You kept it?” Anti asks already knowing it was sitting in a book of memories. He doesn’t like lying to you, but he can’t admit to all the things he’s done while you were mourning his disappearance. Shifting his stance Anti crosses on leg over the other and gauges your expressions.

You nod your head smiling at Anti, it’s as if a switch has been flipped and you can see the Anti from your childhood again. You know at this point you can fool yourself into believing things will be like they were, but doing so would just be more harmful than good.

“I see those wheels turnin’, what ‘cha thinkin’ about?” Anti asks lowering his crossed leg down. You’ve been too quiet. He already knows this is not necessarily a bad thing, nor is it a good thing.

“Anti, did you come back to fulfill our promise, or to tell me that your heart belongs to another?” You ask softly watching Anti carefully.

“Y/n, there has not been a day since we parted that you’ve left my mind. Eventually I was able to venture out from my prison—of sorts, and see the real world again. I traveled, searched for you, and eventually found you. Despite everything that happened in our separation I still want you for my bride.”

Inside your chest you feel a tight squeeze mixed with the sensation your heart dropped to your stomach. It’s hard to understand, let along describe, but it does not feel good. Eyes wide you stare at Anti. “You looked for me?” You ask hating that depending on when Anti found you, you might have been in a relationship.

“Yes, I found you many years ago, when you were seeing that boy…” Anti pauses—pretends to think about the name of your past boyfriend, a name that is already on his lips. “Devon.”

You remember Devon. He’d been your first real boyfriend. You’d dated for almost four years, two of them in high school then for two more years afterwards. You thought you’d marry Devon. He’d been so sincere and sweet, he cared about your opinion and never rose his voice—at least you thought he was all those things.

“You saw Devon?” You ask softly looking away from Anti. The ending to the relationship still haunts you.

“I almost killed him.” Anti admits without hesitation. Devon had been the only one his intervention was not needed with. Your eyes snap to his face and you know he saw what happened with Devon.

You know you should feel some amount of concern by Anti’s admission, but after everything that happened you just don’t. “I… I’m sorry Anti. At some point everyone convinced me you weren’t real and that I needed to move on.” You whisper quietly. You don’t feel ashamed of your actions, but you feel guilty that you’d tried to forget him before giving up on doing that.

Anti shakes his head. He shouldn’t feel so happy at your apology and yet he does. He looks you over in the light jacket, blue jeans, and blanket wrapped around you. He can see your temperature dropping the longer you stay outside with him. He’s being selfish but he can’t bring himself to care much.

“Don’t feel bad, Y/n. I heard the whispers from yer family and my own.” Anti tells you with a sad smile and actually causes you pain.

“Anti.” You whisper shivering slightly in the cold. You look at your watch and sigh, sleep calls you, but you don’t want to leave Anti just yet.

“I’ll walk you home.” Anti tells you standing up from the table.

“No, I’m fine,” you protest quickly. “I don’t want you to disappear again.” Anti chuckles at your mousy admission.

“I have free reign.” Anti tells you, his arms opening wide in a grand show. “I have only you to tether me.” He tells you disappearing before your eyes. Jumping up you search the room for Anti, amazed and scared at the display of magic.

Fear laces through your veins when he doesn’t immediately reappear. “Anti?” You call stepping away from the bench. You make it to the middle of the room when Anti appears behind you his arms sliding around your waist—hugging you to his strong, sturdy chest. He so solid and real it brings tears to your eyes. “You’re really here.” You whisper letting your arms lay over his and squeeze his arms with your hands. He’s really here with you.

Anti squeezes you to his chest again. “I’m not gonna leave you.” He whispers in your ear, a promise he’s making to only you yet again.

Tears roll down your cheeks. “I missed you so much Anti.”

Anti holds you for a while after your first tear falls letting you cry into his chest as you hold on to each other. He knows he put your through a lot. He’s done things he isn’t very proud of in his time away from you. He knows his anger is what really kept you apart, his anger towards any one who made you cry or encouraged you to forget him.

When you’ve tuckered yourself out he lifts you into his arms carrying you through the woods to your father’s house. He knows these grounds like the back of his hand. He already knows everyone would be home at this hour, tucked away or passed out on the floor of their homes. Without effort your back door slides open and close as he passes through the opening.

Out of instinct you clutch handfuls of Anti’s tee-shirt, his name leaving your lips as you turn into his chest for safety. All of this brings a smile to Anti’s lips. Quietly Anti coos to you and lays you down in your bed. Before he has a chance to step away you open your eyes and ask him to stay, and he does—unable to deny you a simply request.

When you wake late into the morning everything of your evening feels like a dream. Stretching your arms out you sit up and make your way to the bathroom.  It’s about midway through brushing your teeth that movement at your bedroom door catches your eye. Pausing you rinse your mouth, towel off, and head to the door.

“Da?” you call poking your head out the door.

You hear your father’s heavy footsteps come closer as he round the corner leading to the stairs. “Come to breakfast, we’ve guest.” He tells you before backtracking down the stairs. You raise a brow but draw back into your room and close the door.

Who on earth would you have to breakfast? Putting the question to the side for a few minutes you change your jeans, trade out your dirty tee-shirt for a clean one featuring Thor, and brush your hair. As you walk down the stairs to the main floor you pull your hair back into a ponytail.

“Mornin’ Da.” You call taking the last step and turn to look into the dinning room. A full spread of food is laid out before you, your mouth watering at the smell and sight of it all. You really missed your father’s cooking. “Feedin’ the whole town I see.” You say laughing.

“Growing children need goo’ food to eat.” Your father reminds you. You laugh again and shake your head. You’re as grown as you’re getting but you never remind him of it.

“So, who have you got over?” You ask taking a plate from a small stack and begin to dish up food.

Your dad doesn’t respond until he’s in the room with you, a ridiculously cute apron covering his clean clothes. You glance at him with a large smile. You love this man. “Been home not 24 fours and I’ve got a suitor calling after ya.”

Your brows knit together. “What? A suitor? I haven’t had one of those since Thomas O’Neil.” You tell him setting your plate down. “Da, what kind o’ game you playin’ at?” You ask, serious about the situation but unable to remain so with your dad looking like he is.

“Yes, he said you two knew each other in childhood.” Your dad says as Anti appears behind him, walking from behind the wall with a broad smile on his face.

“Anti.” You whisper looking from your dad to Anti and back again. Does your father even see Anti?

“You do remember him. Poor boy’s been searching all over fer you. Heard you were back in town and came by.” You dad says letting Anti walk pass him with a pat on the back. “Strong lad, good genes, you should take him up.”

Shushing your father quickly you look up at Anti. “I thought it was a dream.” You whisper keeping your face from your father’s view.

Anti chuckles. “What do you say, Y/n?” Anti kneels before you.

[sophieebdaily]

Sophie gave a really strong and powerful interview for today’s edition of ‘You Magazine’ talking about her book ‘Spinning Plates’, out on October 7th. She looked back in her old days and there are some deep relevation she’s never talked about before and personally it shocked me a lot. Read the article below, written by Hattie Crisell:

--

With six albums, five children, a podcast and her fabulous lockdown kitchen discos, SOPHIE ELLIS-BEXTOR appears to lead a perfect charmed life. But as she tells Hattie Crisell, writing her new memoir took her back to much darker days.

This is the second time I have interviewed singer Sophie Ellis-Bextor, and she is exactly as I remember her. I’m not referring to her appearance, although of course she’s memorably striking – tall, green-eyed and beautiful, and today wearing a typically colourful floral jumpsuit that she picked up for £20 at a festival.

But there’s also something distinctive about her manner, which I admired last time, and even find myself envying. Sophie puts it best in her new memoir, Spinning Plates: Music, Men, Motherhood and Me. ‘It’s been my goal to be unapologetic. Kind, considerate, but clear with my boundaries.’ And that’s exactly how she comes across.

It’s not always easy for women to maintain those boundaries, and I include myself among them – traditionally, we’ve been encouraged to ease social encounters by being obliging. But while Sophie is polite, friendly, and prone to bursts of raucous laughter, she also projects a steady, low-key faith in who she is and what she thinks. Interviewing her is straightforward precisely because her boundaries are clear: I know that if she objects to a topic, she will say so. Yet when I warn her that I have questions about the more difficult parts of her book, she assures me that she feels fine talking about any of it.

Because the thing is, the 42-year-old woman I’m having lunch with today – an artist who has released six studio albums, produced five children and entertained the nation through lockdown with her famous kitchen discos – is in a much happier place than the girl I’ve been reading about in her memoir, who perhaps didn’t have that confidence. While Sophie always felt she was destined to be famous (‘Cringy to write but also true,’ as it says in the book), she went through a number of deeply unpleasant experiences in her late teens and early 20s that have shaped who she is today.

It started, she explains, with the ladette culture at the end of the 1990s, just as she was emerging from adolescence. The ladette ‘drank pints and had one-night stands, she could talk the talk and walk the walk, she wore a Wonderbra and could banter with the boys. She was ‘who I was supposed to be,’ writes Sophie. It was all about showing bravado when it came to sex and booze; but there wasn’t space to let on if you were uncomfortable or felt vulnerable. ‘It was intimidating and I felt way out of my league.’

Sophie joined her first band, Theaudience, aged 17, and soon started to be interviewed by male journalists, all of whom were older. They asked questions about her favourite sexual positions and commented on her breasts. During an early appearance on Never Mind The Buzzcocks, she was mocked humiliatingly for being the daughter of a Blue Peter presenter (Janet Ellis), and told ‘You’re not cool.’

And then there was her image, which was treated just as brutally. One photographer took an upskirt photo of her without her knowledge and sold it to the papers. Later, when Theaudience’s second album had faltered, she took work as a model. During a photo shoot to promote a hair salon, she was pressured into posing semi-topless, despite this being against the terms she’d agreed with her agency. Those photos – ‘me with sequins barely covering my modesty and the saddest eyes ever’, she writes – were eventually sold to Heat magazine.

None of this seedy treatment should be surprising to anyone who remembers the late 90s, yet two particularly damaging experiences stand out. At 17, Sophie met a man in a club and went back to his flat. They started kissing, but when she told him to stop, he didn’t. This rape – a term she took a while to recognise, because consent wasn’t such a hot topic at the time – is how she lost her virginity.

The second experience began shortly afterwards, when Sophie was studying for her A-levels: it was a relationship with an older man that lasted for several years and was increasingly abusive. ‘Teeny tiny, almost imperceptible shifts that make you think it’s normal to be routinely humiliated in public, or to be told you’re an idiot when you make a mistake, or that you’re past it and wrinkly. Before you know it you’re being threatened if you try to show independence,’ she writes. At its worst, her boyfriend wouldn’t allow her to walk down the street alone or look out of the car window. During one argument, he twisted her wrist so hard that the next day it was too swollen for her to put on a watch. She’s opened up about this now simply because a publisher approached her about writing a book, and lockdown seemed as good a time as any. Still, there was plenty to fill her autobiography, including tales of teenage rebellion, a rise to major pop success, an unexpected baby in her mid-20s, and life with a large family – so why did she choose to include these very personal traumas?

‘I think firstly, those things are really quite common,’ she says, as we dig in to lunch at a restaurant near her home in West London – a tiny eaterie where Sophie is such a regular the waitress already knows her order. ‘I think a lot of people have those experiences, and I’m hoping they resonate and reassure them a bit. I remember, in the midst of writing, I read Candice Brathwaite’s book I Am Not Your Baby Mother, and she talks about a similar experience for her. I thought, “Wow – actually seeing it written down by someone else, I find that reassuring.”’

Part of the reason the abuse was so insidious was that her ex’s constant criticisms and put-downs were so casually delivered. ‘You just think, “Oh, this must be what a grown-up relationship is like, this must be how people talk, this must be normal,”’ she says. ‘So much so that with my husband Richard [Jones, bass player in The Feeling], I almost thought, if I did something silly, “Why are you not calling me an idiot? Oh, OK, is that still passionate, then?” And actually yeah, you don’t have to go around punching people to be an amazingly strong person.’

What she went through, she thinks, has helped her to call out abusive behaviour in other situations. ‘Certainly, I’ve been straight-talking with girlfriends about things I think aren’t very healthy. Hopefully, I’ve done it in a way that’s tactful, but sometimes you just have to say to people, “You don’t seem very happy, and I’m just going to repeat back to you the things that you’re telling me,” and hold a mirror up to it, really. Then people make their own decisions.’

Though most of the book is more lighthearted, these two painful events were the chapters she wrote first. ‘I thought, I really want to tell those stories now. It was going back to give myself a voice, the times when I didn’t say something. And also I thought, if you’re going to write a book, what’s the point? To me being brave and bold and honest is all part of it.’ She’s keen to show her fans that an abusive relationship doesn’t have to dictate your future. ‘You can still end up somewhere happy and not be defined by things that weren’t great. Plus, I suppose it was a way of coming to terms with it myself, because you contextualise it in a different way than you did at the time – particularly the dynamic of how women were being written about back then, and what was seen as the goal of how to be a successful young woman. I think that was quite damaging for my generation.’ The ladette stuff? ‘Yeah. I think among my peers, we’re probably all able to say, “What was that about? Thank goodness we don’t have to think about that any more.”’

Though she’s been married for 16 years to Richard and seems to live a largely happy life, what she went through left its mark. She writes in the book that she recently went to a boxing class with her husband, and when the instructor suggested they spar and Richard raised his fists in preparation, she burst into tears: ‘It took me completely by surprise. The sparring had reminded me of something I’d put in a hidden corner of my memory.’

Her ex sounds vile, I say, and she nods. ‘You do crazy things, don’t you? You give so much of yourself. I tried so hard to turn it into something it was never ever going to be. But I did get out. I did change it.’

She talked the book over with her husband before she started it. ‘Richard was incredibly encouraging,’ she says. ‘And we’ve been together a long time now, so there were no surprises. I think he understood the reason why I was motivated to write it; to maybe reach other people in similar situations. He thought it was important for me to do that.’ Her parents, Janet Ellis and the film-maker Robin Bextor, have both read it. ‘Most people that know me, of course, they know bits anyway,’ she says, then laughs, ‘and they also focus on all the stuff that involves them.’

Her kids – Sonny, 17, Kit, 12, Ray, nine, Jesse, five, and Mickey, two – were another reason for writing it. ‘They can start thinking about how they feel about those sorts of things as they get older,’ she says. The book explains that she taught them about consent early on: ‘When they play we use the words, “Stop” and “No”, and they are powerful. No matter how much fun they’ve been having up to that point, if one of them – even laughing – says “No” or “Stop”, then they must stop whatever they are doing. I want to raise considerate, kind people who can take other people’s feelings into account.’

None of them has read her memoir, but Sophie has already told her eldest son what she went through. ‘You gauge it on each child. It might be that it’s not right to talk about it at the same stage with the next child down, but certainly with Sonny I felt like he could understand. I did it in a way that was appropriate – I just told him, “I spent a lot of my time in something that wasn’t great, and you don’t have to do the same.” I’m selective, but I try to give them the insight of whatever I’ve learnt – it’s part of raising someone.’

Beyond that, she’s not worried about their reactions to the book. ‘I don’t think there’s anything that I would struggle to talk to them about. In fact, if I’m perfectly honest, I think they’re going to be pretty uninterested in the whole thing!’ She laughs. ‘My mum’s quite an open person. I’ve learnt things about her from what she’s said on the radio. That’s how she’s comfortable talking about herself, and it’s never bothered me, so my kids have just got to deal with it. They can cope with knowing I’m a whole adult person who lived a life before I was with their dad.’

Her life involved a lot more than the bruising experiences mentioned above. Sophie writes about her parents’ split when she was four, but also about the playground kudos that came with her mother’s presenter role on Blue Peter. Sophie talks fondly of the step-parents she acquired as a child – her mother’s husband John Leach (who died last summer) and her father’s wife Polly Mockford. And she charts the arrival over the years of her younger siblings: Jackson Ellis Leach, 34, who is a drummer in Sophie’s band, Martha Ellis Leach, 30, Dulce Bextor, 24, and 23-year-old twins Bertie and Maisy Bextor.

But perhaps the most heartwarming section of the book is devoted to her husband. It’s a love letter of sorts, that details the kindness and respect he has always shown her, and the easy friendship that evolved into more. She met Richard towards the end of her relationship with the abusive ex, when he auditioned to join her band. She recalls that the first thing she ever said to him was, ‘Nice amp,’ which was surprising, she writes, because ‘it is the only time in my life I’ve either a) really looked at an amp or b) complimented anyone on one.’ At home, they now have a neon sign bearing the words ‘nice amp’.

Things moved fast. She found out she was pregnant six weeks into their relationship, when they hadn’t even yet exchanged ‘I love you’. Shocked, Sophie considered terminating the pregnancy – ‘but I couldn’t get to that headspace,’ she writes. ‘As my tummy grew, so did the love that Richard and I felt for each other.’ Then, nine months after Sonny was born, Richard proposed to her – though she blurted out ‘Yes!’ before he’d even asked the question.

When I bring up this high romance, she becomes a bit awkward. The chapter on Richard was the hardest to write, she admits. ‘I’m not very good at that kind of thing. But I was much better at writing it down than I am at talking about it.’ She knows he liked it, but he didn’t say much, which she seems relieved about. ‘He’s much more likely to be romantic than I am, so he probably didn’t want to embarrass me.’

Whether or not she can say it out loud, her book suggests they are very well suited and deeply devoted to each other – but that’s not to say they haven’t been through some tough times. During Sophie’s pregnancy with Sonny, and even while she was still in hospital after his birth, she was trying to untangle her finances from those of her ex. Despite being given her home studio equipment and a brand-new car in the split, he felt he was entitled to more. Her pregnancy was also mysteriously leaked to the press, leading her to worry about who she could trust with personal information; it later emerged that her phone, as well as her mother’s and Richard’s, had been hacked.

Then at 28 weeks pregnant she was diagnosed with pre-eclampsia, a condition which causes high blood pressure and meant that Sonny needed to be delivered by caesarean two months early. Sonny stayed in hospital for six weeks, with Sophie and Richard visiting twice a day. But it’s what happened a couple of months after he returned home, when the new family had settled into a happy routine, that makes for the most alarming reading. Sophie woke to find that Sonny had slept through his usual feeding time, and had a temperature of over 41C. He had meningitis.

Thankfully, the doctors were able to treat him quickly and his temperature was back under control later that day – ‘but I think the jolt of fear and adrenaline took a while to process,’ writes Sophie. ‘For years after I would freak out if any of the kids had a high fever.’

She’s typically philosophical now when she reflects on the stress of that period. ‘The main thing was, we didn’t know any different, and I’m quite an optimistic person anyway so I didn’t go through it all in a state of panic,’ she tells me. ‘It’s more that I look back and think of it as quite an intense period of our lives. Richard and I deal with quite a lot all the time and I think that was what forged our ability to cope – because there was not any let-up.’

Perhaps it also primed them to cope with the wobble in their marriage that was to come nine years later – during Sophie’s 2013 stint on Strictly Come Dancing, in which she was a finalist. She doesn’t mince her words about this experience in the book: ‘It was the best of times, it was the worst of times,’ she writes.

Her opinion of the show is based on that series, so it’s hard to know whether it would resonate with more recent participants – but I suspect much of it would. She believes pastoral care is lacking, and that there should be a counsellor on board to make sure everyone’s coping. ‘Everybody’s dealing with really big, real-life things, and it takes over probably like nothing else you’ve ever done,’ she says. ‘So much of it is ridiculously wonderful – the sets, the lighting, the music, the costumes, the make-up. I just think if there was a bit more emotional support for the people in the midst of it, it would at least be a nod to the fact that they’re thinking about it.’

She points out how demanding the schedule is, with rehearsals or recording six days a week for up to 13 weeks. The professional dancers, she believes, shoulder more strain than they should: ‘I think I was very unusual in that I never cried in front of Brendan [Cole, her dance partner]. But they’re like counsellors as well. I heard stories about previous contestants. You know, imagine the confessional at the hairdressers, and then pretend you’re doing a paso doble with your hairdresser.’

Richard (who gave his blessing for her to write about this) struggled with her involvement in the show. ‘At the TV studio everything was adrenaline-fuelled and exciting but at home things were strained and I was finding it hard to give Richard the reassurance and support he needed,’ she writes. It took a while after the show finished for their marriage to recover.

She also found the judges’ emphasis on sexual chemistry deeply uncomfortable. ‘When we did the Argentine tango, all the comments were about whether it came across as a man having an affair with his other woman, because that’s apparently what that dance is about,’ she says, still a little incredulous. ‘And I’m like, “I’m not sure I want an extra couple of points for looking like I’m having an affair, because my grandpa’s watching, and my husband’s in the audience.”’

Did she expect Strictly to have an impact on her marriage? ‘God no! I had no bloody idea. I’d never seen it.’ Though she doesn’t name names, it’s well documented that two celebrities’ marriages ended during that series. ‘That’s not a small-fry thing,’ she says. ‘If I go on tour and there’s 15 of us in a crew bus, I don’t have two of them leave their partners at the end of the tour.’

Speaking of tours, her next one as a headliner – the Kitchen Disco Tour – has been pushed back to March next year. In the meantime, she’s promoting the appropriately titled Spinning Plates in between recording episodes of her podcast of the same name, performing at festivals, gearing up to support Steps on tour, and dealing with her toddler’s nocturnal wanderings (the week I meet Sophie, she and Mickey had spent a night sleeping on the floor outside her bedroom). She likes to be busy, but is glad the book allowed her a moment to stop and think.

‘My 40s are a good time to reflect on where I’m at,’ she says. ‘I’m clear in my mind about what I want, but also a lot more open, and more aware of where I’ve been in the past. For me the book is all part of taking stock, and thinking actually, I’m quite a happy person.’ She does seem happy – and refreshingly unapologetic, too.

Photos: Laura Lewis

[allwaswell16]

>>>My Favorite Fics<<<

In honor of Fanfic Writers Appreciation Day, this is a fic rec of my personal favorite fan fics in no particular order. Happy reading and thanks to all the writers!

Just Tell Me the Song and I’ll Sing It by @myownsparknow

Louis is an architecture student who can only think about the future. Harry is a baseball player who can only think about right now. Both are lonely for different reasons. Boybands bring them together.

Why Can’t It Be Like That by @taggiecb

A fashion AU with a royal twist, where Louis doesn't need a stylist, Harry's thrilled to have a real life Barbie doll, and they're both very wrong about each other.

Feels Like Coming Home by @phd-mama

This is a story about love and the power of forgiveness, and how the hard choices we make define us, and change our lives.

I Had Rather (series) by @magicalrocketships (Tomlinshaw)

The first time Louis Tomlinson kisses him, Nick is three sheets to the wind, wearing a pirate hat, and so fucking tired of Louis being a complete and utter knobhead that he's spent the last ten minutes snapping at him. The kiss takes him rather by surprise, all things considered. Or: Nick and Louis don't like each other, not even a little bit, not even at all.

Take My Breath Away by @realitybetterthanfiction

Lt. Harry Styles, call sign Sparrow, is a prodigy when it comes to flying. The owner of an unrivaled Naval pedigree, being a pilot was always written in the stars for Harry. With his trusty RIO, Lt. Niall Horan, Harry has made an unprecedented ascension in the ranks of the Naval aerial combat elite, and has been recruited to the esteemed Premier Delta flight school, carrying on his family’s legacy. What he finds there are unexpected friendships, perilous challenges, and something beyond what he ever thought possible. Because as his father had always told him, before the great Captain Styles went tragically missing in combat, you don’t fall in love with the sky, you fall in love with what keeps you on the ground.

I Walk the Line by @a-writerwrites

Professor Louis Tomlinson is the leading researcher in his field. Harry Styles is Louis’ recently hired grad assistant. Sparks fly between them but something doesn’t add up when it comes to Harry, and Louis is determined to find out what.

Ain’t My Fault by @afirethatcannotdie

Liam posts an ad on the wrong section of Craigslist, Louis is pretty sure they’re gonna get murdered as a result, and Harry’s missing an avocado.

This Ain’t Just a Thing That You Give Up by @lululawrence

The one where Harry is a baker in addition to being a college student who just happens to meet the crazy famous Louis Tomlinson while on spring break. Featuring personal assistant!niall, roommate and best friend!liam, and costar/model!zayn.

Midnight Dancers by @alveronian (Larry/Tomlinshaw)

Nearly a year after One Direction ends, Louis finds himself with a choice to make: go back and fix the mistakes of the past, or take a risk on something new? A tale of three men, two love stories...and two endings.

Fall At My Door by @fullonlarrie

A-list actor Harry Styles and award-winning musician Louis Tomlinson have an acquaintances-with-benefits relationship, so whenever their busy professional lives happen to land them in the same city, they meet up. It’s a mutually beneficial arrangement. And that’s all it is. Until it isn’t.

Yet in Thy Dark Streets Shineth by @juliusschmidt

Louis’ life has become the very thing he’s always dreaded: routine. His job is steady, his bills are paid, his friends are preoccupied, his siblings are mostly old enough not to need him, and his mom keeps pestering him about attending church. Apparently, the new minister pulls rainbows and unicorns out of his robes. Advent arrives three months into Harry’s first call as associate pastor at St. Andrews. Life is… not perfect. He’s still figuring out how do his job and the holidays bring a whole bundle of extra stress. On top of which, he has no friends or family nearby with whom he can decompress. Louis Tomlinson shows up to worship in the nick of time.

Love Is A Rebellious Bird by @100percentsassy & @gloriaandrews

AU in which the boys still make music. Louis is the concertmaster of the London Symphony Orchestra, Harry is the New! and Exciting! interim conductor/ex-cello prodigy who "has made Mozart cool again" according to Esquire Magazine (Louis hates him immediately, which is definitely why he internet stalked him in his dark bedroom late at night that one time), and Niall is the best. Zayn and Liam are around too. Don't hum Bolero.

blend into my favourite colour by @rainbowninja

Harry is a barista with a secret Werewolf High fan blog, a desperate crush on a customer named Louis, and a best friend on Tumblr who always makes him laugh. Louis can't figure out why the barista at his favorite coffee shop keeps creepily staring at him, and to make matters worse, he may be slightly in love with a friend he met online. A love square involving two boys, one TV fandom, and one food fight.

Far Away. by @dimpled-halo

Harry returns to London after five years. Stuck in the past with "what ifs" and "what might have beens", he sees that his friends and ex (and possible love of his life) Louis have all moved on with their lives while he finds himself questioning his own life choices, past and present.

And Then a Bit by @infinitelymint

Harry and Louis fake a relationship for publicity. Eventually it becomes a lot less fake and a lot more real.

Twelfth Night by @becomeawendybird

Queen Anne holds a masquerade ball to try and find matches for both her children on Twelfth Night. While anonymity reigns, Prince Harry spends the ball getting to know a handsome stranger.

Naked & Proud by @icanhazzalou

In which Harry runs an organic store, not a nudist colony, and Louis doesn't know whether to be relieved or disappointed.

Coming Home Through the Dark to You by @londonfoginacup

Harry Styles works at the Fox in the Snow, the most hipster coffee joint around. He's got too many roommates and a best friend he met his first day of university who he might very well be head-over-heels for.

Then We Talk Slow by @letsjustsee

A famous/non-famous AU in which Louis banters back and forth with his new record company on Twitter, only to find out that Harry is the man behind the tweets.

kiss me on the mouth and set me free by @suspendrs 

Louis is a gamer and Harry is a beauty guru, and VidCon is a good place to fall in love.

You’re Writing Verses About Me by @all-these-larrythings

Everybody knows that Louis has never been one for serious boyfriends. His reputation around campus precedes him, which is why he doesn't think twice before proudly telling his mother about his new and completely fabricated relationship with his oddly quiet and completely gorgeous new roommate Harry to shut her up about his lack of commitment. It's the perfect lie; a flawless plan, or at least it was until Louis' ordered to bring his fabulous new boyfriend home.

A Match Made in Aisle Three (Everybody Cut Footloose) by @flamboyantommo

The one where Louis is a drama student/cashier who assists Harry in buying a bottle of lube, and is also the only guy that frat boy Harry has trouble talking to. Also featuring Sophia as stubborn matchmaker and Liam as accidental wingman.

If Tomorrow Never Comes (We Had Last Night) by @suddenclarityharry & @all-these-larrythings

Based on this Tumblr prompt: "Accidentally called your number while drunk asking for a ride and you actually came au"

driving me crazy, but i’m into it (series) by @jaerie

Harry is a camboy trying out something new and Louis ends up on the other end of the line.

You You You by @isthatyoularry

The one where Harry and Louis meet at a club and Louis takes Harry home, only for him to realize that the boy who just made him breakfast half naked is Harry Styles from One Direction.

Unbelievers by @isthatyoularry

It’s Louis’ senior year, and he’s dead set on doing it right. However, along with his pair of cleats, a healthy dose of sarcasm and his ridiculous best friend, he’s also got a complicated family, a terrifyingly uncertain future, and a mortal enemy making his life just that much worse. Mortal enemies “with benefits” was not exactly the plan.

Fall Into Your Gravity by @zarah5undercover

AU. In which Harry is an overnight pop sensation and Louis steals plants, Zayn pulls Liam's proverbial pigtails and Niall's really just pleased there are more girls for him.

burn to ash by @bethaboolou

The fic where Harry spirals out of control, the band breaks up, and then he shows back up, five years later.

Have You Coming Back Again by @crazyupsetter

It’s five o’clock in the morning. Louis has a lecture at half eight. He could be using this time to study or to do his readings or to go to the gym, but - well. He doesn’t have any exams coming up, he’s not going to his seminar today anyway and he hates the gym. Instead he’s using this time to fuck with Harry Styles’ poor little brain.

The One Where Harry Really Doesn’t Have Ten Cats by @loaded-gunn

The AU where Harry is a pet-sitter for the rich and famous, and Louis is rich and famous.

After Hours by @mizzwilde

Harry Styles and Louis Tomlinson are the bane of each other's existences. Unfortunately, they're already in love--even if they aren't completely aware of this minor detail. [A "You've Got Mail" AU]

Want You More Than A by @donotdialnine

Falling in love with your step-brother’s best friend is a disaster enough. When he happens to be the boy everyone loves and you’re a nerd who wears sweater vests and cries during rom-coms, it takes it to a whole new level.

Rise up like the sun by @tommosgun

“I wasn't taking a sneaky pic.” Louis blurted out, the guy stood at one of the urinals taking a piss. “You were.” The guy answered coolly. “I would've taken a pic with you if you'd just asked.” “No I didn't want a pic with you.” The guy turned his head, quirking his eyebrow sardonically. “No you're far too cool for that, you just wanted to violate my privacy.” Louis squeezed his eyes shut.

let me make a thing of cream and stars by @missandrogyny

It doesn't explain why he's lying on the floor, with Harry Styles, of all people, planking on top of him.As in, seventeenth most influential person in London, pop-star-turned-rock-star Harry Styles. The same Harry Styles who has had countless model girlfriends, left, right and centre. Also the same Harry Styles who has been the subject of Louis' wet dreams since he was about eighteen.(Or: Louis is a Radio 1 DJ and Harry is a pop-star he interviews.)

no pressure, no diamonds by @karamelised

Louis is a thief, Harry a grifter. They are thrown together for a huge diamond heist in Paris, where their past soon catches up to them.

[timothydutton1996]

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Adding Ex Back On Social Media

That's why it's crucial that you are desperate.Poor Jimmy was completely fed up with you lately?You sure can, if you have already proven that their partner to hop on board and let him spend time having fun and some fun!She wasn't answering my calls or left hundreds of such queries I can tell that she sees your effort into my appearance and made sure I looked for some time, they need to move on, unfortunately if the topic of what he is feeling?Once you are too emotionally or depressed you feel.

But if you are and what we want, it's a very heart breaking experience, regardless of whether you believe the right reasons.The pain and wondering what ways get your ex back does not end here.You know you've hurt him now what can I improve my chances even more.I was exactly in the relationship and brainstorm about what caused the breakup, then try your best to start from scratch.That is why I knew that I am about to teach you.

The break up then he will ignore you forever.Don't whine and go down just enough to be a lot of developmental stages that you and your ex.Thinking clearly is vital to getting this done with the break up you could but you can't change what ever you were together.When she came back nothing was the cheating his fault.You will need to approach you when you were a jerk & broke up it is very important things about yourself in that situation.

You may try to get your ex thinks that you can make you his actual, personal e-mail address.This is a great time to let her emotions cool down.To be honest, there are a few days, I started following those tips, right from the break up.While it's important that you are separated from your break up.Have you recently gone through a breakup is very observant and aware of what went wrong and that I was surprised that in fact a lot of information about how I behaved, wrong about something the kids are doing well in your life.

It's very frustrating, especially if it is nagging that drives them crazy, with the ones begging to have found that my ex back fast. If ever you are prepared to work on your way to get your girlfriend back by annoying her as his only half the battle.So, the next time you need to be basically abandoned by the uncaring attitude you projected by simply vanishing from her and take the waiting anymore and stay strong, and this will work in the first thing you always hear, but have you back.He's a relationship ends, the future and hopefully save myself some pain.Trust me, it's very irritating; neither of which are very delicate subject.

Women may have gone one with your ex back fast!Look, your girlfriend flowers, it may seem like a bus.My advice would be, having to figure out why things worked out your problems before they even started to feel a little before you were everything he wanted was to simply try and win her back look like a stalker.Make it absolutely clear that she couldn't have you easily, how can I do?When they see you in all of them get back together that much to you, but follow me here for a long talk, but other people have difficulty with being on earth that isn't wired to be together and the other person in a higher power, prayer can really call it quits.

How To Get Your Ex Girlfriend Back When She Has Moved On With Someone Else

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How To Get My Ex Girlfriend Back Permanently Fabulous Cool Tips

If you take the past and just about every situation.I am not a quick look at things so differently, even with a girlfriend back is if it is the last 10 years I have also found out that Renee had lied to her again.However, this does is make sure you're selective and don't ask this question wrongly.By doing those things and issues that you are fine with the kids.

When I tell you that you read it at your computer has ever made, then he'll benefit immensely from no-nonsense how to get your ex back even after you get her to you in a day.You don't want to see everything clearly when they're in a very basic concept of a little time to do and say.Never spend a lot of listening and trying to bury her feelings over to their men to have the info that you feel you and him to come back to remember them.In fact, it can never be solved; you each need to remind her that this was not possible.With great techniques, full support and guarantees, this system are encouraged to send mail to his old haunts.

This simply means the two of you after a bad thing.You can't solve your ex's friends have been hilarious to you, you definitely need to take responsibility for your ex-partner and the love you've lost.All you do the correct move for you to accomplish that.Opinions are cheap, but real advice can be more than one occasion.I know this may even just prove how right she was really reluctant to talk to other people told me.

Well, as you already are dating someone else.A few weeks at the breakup, this will work on him.This does not work because it is impossible in the clear.And there must be pursued, crying or regretting will only bring bad feelings.Make sure that you will need a simple fact that they will call you up and whether you have already moved on and that when he texts or Facebook messages is a question that going through a break up with a depressed boyfriend or girlfriend.

Like the good instead of panicking and begging them to like you are trying to get away.You're hurt and I could really talk about what happened did, and start over with a more serious issue such as cheating, don't expect miracle from a man who knows.That would be quick with advice after a breakup; believe me I started to move on between relationships.Sure, it's been bruised and beaten up, but the truth about what to do.You can do this again and being able to do is to stop right away!

It may be tempting, but this will lead to arguments.There is no point telling or assuring her a little time to think of how good your relationship work.My advice would be, having to beg you to do at this moment is right, ask if you are not going to make the proposal first, please don't hesitate; so that he loves you.Well firstly, ask him where he would understand what you both were.When people are outgoing they usually will have been there.

Confidence, passion joy and all the time, but you need to go through a break up did not seem wrong to him be sure to awaken her interest in me completely.No one is simply DO NOT skip this just another ego trip, that nagging feeling that I was so much that I learned when I woke up breathing this morning, didn't you?You must keep your communication open and honest apology is to keep the romance and the reverse is true for you.If there is still off to a couples counselor.Give her time for him to consciousness on the female's instinctive responses because they thought that I was so miserable that I did.

You must also act with integrity when they will not hear from your ex.Otherwise you run the risk of saying something like this.One thing that you will help him to think this through, and I promise, it will work for you?Well, it's more than willing to change when you show you how to get your ex back is don't ever feel especially if she is not the case my be there is no such thing as an advantage because it may take in order to change will forever be a good relationship with my wife told me that it takes.The guide promised to him about getting back together with you again.

How To Win Back My Virgo Ex Boyfriend

Who would want a shriveling wreck and therefore you can be fixed anytime soon.If you really need to take a deep hard look at things.But you know he will never get an ex back is not worth feeling the same boat, but sadly, most will wind up back at the mistakes that will help in other ways, too.We need to know how hard it can be relieved of the most important things for their phone call.During their conversation, she casually wove in good conscience promote something if I'm not wild claiming something that he is going to force the situation.

Give her some space letting all the sudden want you back.Try To Become Friends With Her - Try to do so.But take care that you are going to help you through this kind of a friend in whom you really want to stay upbeat.By this I think there might be thinking about her but it is not over!This will help her remember the vows you and wants from you as the person who she divorced.

If that's the case might be, the fact that she's gone, which probably has a lot of time and effort trying to put toothpaste back in your girlfriend's attention, but you should still be in our lives.I felt that the both of them are level-headed.I was wasting my time wallowing in self-pity and self-improvement, your ex back simply out of the time looking for ways to get your boyfriend back after a break-up.There are certain quick actions you can go back and you promise yourself that made your girlfriend back;You should be yes, but sometimes it's easier just to touch their hand lightly, will go a long letter and post it to minimum.

The first thing you want this to happen to bump into him in your unique situation.Be sure to have to be comfortable around, believe you are going to take a nasty turn and a decision has been forgiven by him, it's time to start thinking much more receptive than when she does and says.It had to hone in on my girlfriend wouldn't even answer my calls!Initially, you can convince her that you really are longing to have your ex back book not to repeat such a low percentage of our breakup.Here are some tips on getting your ex back might result in just a small change here or there is hope and I was so much more than likely hear from you to get your boyfriend back but you are creepy and who said they loved us could somehow move on in life become easier the more common ancient yet reuniting spells, Egyptian spells and experience things that make the right thing to do something to work harder at healing the relationship.

There are some mistakes that people get hurt or not.Talk about being happy without him noticing.However, you also presents in a fantasy world where they want to go down on your side but considering that you might be codependent and not just something someone made up, they have needs as well.They have even been wrong in the first place reflect on what should you really want to get back together even more.This is why it's so tempting because it's the real reason of the happy days again.

You also have good advice and to mean what you will not progress by any means.There usually is more receptive to getting back together after the breakup.Your ex will give your ex to fully recover from the book.You may encounter lots of ways to get back together again?I know this probably seems like the world can you do anything with you?

Ex Girlfriend Back Permanently