#I also love the bg colors he (6) ended up making. They give me a sense of conflict and despair which was perfect for this

[eudikot]

Painted with my little brother last night. He did the background then I painted over it

[uninformedartist]

So a review on Helluva boss So2 ep 6

Ok so gonna break this review down into positives and negatives with my additional thoughts.

Positives:

So always start off with this, big props and love to the animation team we know know and see your struggle working under Vivienne and animating her over-complicated designs. Props to the BG team really stunning backgrounds, was actually a bit over the top for me (Ozzie's palace and especially the dildo factory shit was moving way too fast) but did pause to have a look at the BGs it is really pretty, the shit pacing made everything a visual blur tho.

VA work stunning love always a joy to hear Alex and James in any VA work tho Fizz's song was eyyy not the best but don't blame Alex it was a shittly written song in general especially when it went to the heavy metal part, overstimulating af and again shit pacing during the song and the flashing visuals gave me a headache. Striker's new VA, Ed's voice really grew on me he should've been Striker in the 1st place because I know for a fact Norman couldn't reprise his role for future episodes.

I loved Ozzie and Fizz's relationship especially the end scene where you can see Ozzie development or got hold of the best technology to give Fizz functional limbs, was a tender scene their relationship and interactions made me smile. I'll give Viv 1 ty for not fucking up their relationship, ty Viv (I can be nice to her :). Tho 1 scene that bothered me... the 12 sec Ozzie dong scene 💀 my soul it was just so jarring especially with the fast pacing. Felt like a race car coming to an immediate stop then speeding off again. Would've like the scene replaced with Fizz telling Bliz something nice about Ozzie, why Fizz likes him. I'm tired of queer couples/pairings in this show describing their partner in 2 ways, 1. how good they are in bed or 2. they got x anatomy that's amazing. But its Viv writing this ep, sigh her and her damn middle school sex jokes I'll let it slide.

Now negatives:

I said it before I'll say it for all eternity, the pacing was dogshit bad oh my soul wtf... Viv, Adam whoever I know you guys don't listen to criticism but if any criticism you take fix your damn pacing 😑. I had to pause multiple times just to see what has happening, what was said, what this paper/sign etc said. It was bad, and that paired with the overdetailed BGs and character designs, for the 1st time ever I got overstimulted from a HB ep and had to take a 5 min break to rest my eyes (was by Fizz's song). Its a noisey spinning kaleidoscope this ep, so unpleasant and its all pacing. Stay on certain scenes a bit longer and allow the audience to take in the scene before them (that flackback scene) its makes a difference. If you get overwhelmed/overstimlated ect by such visuals I recommend watching the leaked episode its much better in terms of pacing since its mostly storyboards and there is no color, plus its just the VAs talking with no background music and zero to minimal sound effects.

I didn't care for Crimson in this episode, I know he became Viv's favorite 😒 but seeing this fucker back so soon, it wasn't enjoyable, especially since the only reason he's in this ep is for a "big score" 😑. Also I'm tired of this over convenient plots, Fizz so happened to be in the greed ring and so happened to run into Blitz and Striker so happened to be in greed meeting with Crim who need a man for a "big score" AND SO HAPPENED Striker sees Fizz/Blitz fighting outside the window 🙃. Its all too convenient for me it takes me out and I then think how the plot coming together is ridiculous.

Striker is so under utilized. Since Viv hates him (confirmed by sources I can't pull now apologies) and she wrote this episode, everything established of Striker in So1 is destroyed. He's a husk of his intended character, all talk no show, a misogynistic clown who you can see Viv has no care writing him properly because she doesn't like him which is fucking horrible, this woman will butcher an integral villian, one with a good motivation (he hates blue-bloods) all because "oh I don't like him he's not in my fav OC list", petty af.

Fizz's disability and how its handled, spoke about it in this post:

It still remains the same though now we see it wasn't Wally holding the cake just some other imp and the card Bliz made for Fizz was a love confession still doesn't justify his reaction shoving the imp and his still underlying jealousy of Fizz since they were young. Yes it was backing off from a love confession/ashamed he's not as good a performer as Fizz, Blitz was jealous of Fizz. Made another post saying how I like how Fizz sees his disability, he's content, happy, has Ozzie who understands him and even made/went out his way to get Fizz the best prosthetics to better his quality of life, I like that good on Fizzy :).

5. Going to be a separate long post on (ಠ_ಠ) Blitz, THE FUCKING BIRD IS BACK 💀💀💀 why your rotisserie chicken ass not in hospital or we just skipping past that and how Viv keeps I'm gonna say it, forcing her characters to have daddy issues by writing this fucking irritating basic fanfic trope of killing the mother offscreen/not having the mother in the picture/us seeing her face. A commenter pointed this out and it irritates me because its the 3rd time she does this, she show Tilla (Blitz's mom) in pictures, you think there would be an episode revolving around Blitz's childhood etc but no she's "in" a fast paced pitty party flashback. This woman really can't show an ounce of respect to any female characters.

This is all for now, will be making more posts the more this ep settles in.

Score: 4.7/10

[marginalias]

relistened to the album a few times and i actually love skinz - it’s probably my favorite track, but that’s because i’ve been on an industrial/noise kick for the past year - and thematically ip2 does feel like ip1′s evil twin (skinz>libido, suit dance>instinct, gaslighting>byredo, ult bliss>tog, it even has the same progression lol)

some thoughts (music, performance, mv, lore), maybe too many thoughts

ip2 is a really good album but absolutely feels like it’s gone through a massive transformation from whatever the initial concept was - i feel like i can hear a few points where the lines have been redistributed, it might just be confirmation bias and presumably a lot of this stuff has been rearranged/restructured/rewritten to better fit a group without... their... lead... vocalist...... brb have to go smash my head through a cinderblock

ANYWAY

thoughts on the music: oh they’ve done it again my god. skinz/gaslighting genuinely addictive, put ult bliss in the MOMA, suit dance just genuinely nice and fun. all their performances are incredible and their repertoire of vocal techniques has expanded unbelievably in the past year. extremely extremely impressed with kyubin in particular, especially because they autotuned the shit out of that man in asoiaf and now they’ve figured out how to use more of his natural vocal color/his technique has improved so much! love hearing mill get more lines, killing the rap verses even though they should have perhaps rewritten the gaslighting verse to not contain the word “teetering” just my opinion. they’re really playing with texture and dynamics as well - whispering, growling, belting, falsetto, WHOEVER WAS SINGING AT 2:09 IN SKINZ I WILL --dialup noises-- like i almost ascended.

i still think ip1 is the stronger album in terms of unity of concept - suit dance my beloved i am still not entirely sure where you fit in this album of toxic possessive sm anthems but you’re doing great mwah

thoughts on the stage performances: genuinely if not for the skinship bits, it’s just a solid sexy bg performance. it’s kind of down there with sage in terms of coherency - there are a lot of disparate parts interspersed with cool points. i think the “death drive” concept behind ip2 (restoring earlier states of being with the end goal being nonexistence) explains the repetition of a lot of previous choreo (i counted designer, dora maar, asoiaf, savanna, libido, maaaybe angel? and love’s characteristic power gesture that he likes to do while belting ok cry break). i think if the original lore was intact all of this would make so much more sense as a death drive concept (starts with libido, ends with savanna) and tie into the time travel narrative from dpj/lsg.

based on that, if you held a gun to my head and made me guess, i would say the skinz choreo has been in the works at least since the end of libido promos and they didn’t have the budget to create something out of whole cloth after aug 2, so we’re seeing them change up the formations slightly to disguise the fact that there’s an even number of members. the first stage had some holes in formations that probably only showed up because of comeback nerves. kpop performances lend themselves better to odd numbers of performers --gritting my teeth-- but astro and oneus make 6 work, and i think shinhwa was a 6 member group, so it’s not impossible, just not the most convenient number to work with. but i think this was pretty clearly originally designed for 7.

also oh my god i had forgotten how much i LOOOOOVE popping and locking bless them for giving mill that little spotlight.

thoughts on the skinz mv/lore: booooo it was funded by thoughts and prayers. would not be surprised if they blew their actual funds on an mv shoot with all 7 members in july and then had to reshoot this in nov/dec after delaying their fall comeback long enough to revise the whole album and oh i will stop there before going full doomer about 8d’s financial ruination.

the mv itself is pretty but feels like a really weak refrain to libido, where you have these intimate shots and innuendos representing the ego/conscious in color (junji-rie lollipop scene is highly underrated as one of the most shockingly sexual parts of the libido mv btw and i haven’t seen anyone talk about this) and then sink the viewer into the black and white realm of the id and subconscious desire. it does a really good job of highlighting the point choreography too.

if libido is about the entanglement of repressed sexual desire and divinity and creation, then we would expect the title track of ip2 to be destrudo or mortido and for the album to talk about monstrous/consuming sexuality and gross mortality and destruction. and the MUSIC!!!! DOES THAT!!

but the mv is sort of a flat sketch of the music - skinz is about the death drive (destrudo/mortido) as repetition and restaging of scenes from earlier in life, the eruption of the past into the present, the desire for destruction at the hand of a romantic/sexual partner - and the mv is about, um, a fan’s desire to be accepted and possessed by their idols in the most G-rated way possible, i guess? there’s not really a way to y/n your way into a choreography without a backup dancer which they absolutely cannot afford right now, so i’m seriously wondering what the id (b/w) portions are supposed to be representing. a fan’s sexual appetite for their idols underlying benign fantasies? if we were going to go this route i think we should have also gotten voyeuristic handicam aspect ratio from inside the choreography, as if someone was inserting themselves into both the id and ego of the video and “possessing”/restaging the full experience of the libido mv.

also it’s cool that they literally “restaged” the mv on the black platform! not entirely sure what the glitch/artifacting effects are meant to indicate - maybe artificiality and simulation - but they do remind me of this brian eno quote:

Whatever you now find weird, ugly, uncomfortable and nasty about a new medium will surely become its signature. CD distortion, the jitteriness of digital video, the crap sound of 8-bit - all of these will be cherished and emulated as soon as they can be avoided. It’s the sound of failure: so much modern art is the sound of things going out of control, of a medium pushing to its limits and breaking apart. The distorted guitar sound is the sound of something too loud for the medium supposed to carry it. The blues singer with the cracked voice is the sound of an emotional cry too powerful for the throat that releases it. The excitement of grainy film, of bleached-out black and white, is the excitement of witnessing events too momentous for the medium assigned to record them. (from A Year With Swollen Appendices)

speaking of aspect ratio why were the color/ego shots pillarboxed so inconsistently? are we actually communicating different things when the color shots are letterboxed vs pillarboxed? because the taped footage from the practice studio in the beginning has the same aspect ratio as the shots that are supposed to be a fan’s y/n fantasy, but seems to communicate that someone is observing? am i looking too hard into an mv that clearly has a budget of whatever mom had in her wallet at the moment? the answer is probably yes but i just want to believe in competence so bad.

i wonder if the original mv concept was more grimy? i know a lot of people were theorizing that someone would die, and i was ready for a kind of dc deja vu/oneus tbontb thing where people are killing each other offscreen, but from the skinz mv teaser i was expecting “smack my bitch up” by the prodigy, and it has echoes of that - initial scene with the car as the hit and run, the ktv room as the bar, the beach as the strip club - without the misogyny (thankfully), recreational drugs (would probably get them banned in korea), or violence (boo). again, might be confirmation bias, especially since the first person shooting style was probably chosen for budgetary reasons, but i would have loved to see that sort of destructive/self-destructive all-night bender rampage, especially because the “smack my bitch up” mv was incredibly controversial and highly censored and i know jaden jeong is probably into that kind of thing.

anyway i will update this if the suit dance mv has anything to say but i have no idea at this point so i will conclude my thoughts after saying that i hope they haven’t actually ditched the lore. doesn’t seem like it at least music-wise but holy smokes this mv was dire. maybe i’m missing something! who knows! someone else figure out the aspect ratio thing please and perhaps this will all make sense.

[ogcassiopeia]

M+M Answers Kpop Questions

1.     Which group have you thought about stanning, but never seem to get around to it? 

I’ve essentially only ever stanned TVXQ and never deviated from that but I could totally see myself stanning Shinee or Monsta X.

2.     Do you have any irl friends that like kpop?

It depends on what you mean by irl. As of right now, I only have one irl friend, who lives in Canada, that enjoys kpop as much as I do. We met back in the early 2000s when both her and I were massively into TVXQ. She moved on to stanning BTS after TVXQ broke up but she still loves TVXQ and we talk about kpop and other life happenings often. The kpop friend I had here physically in my town with me eventually moved to a different city and we lost contact a few years ago. I am not even sure if she still enjoys kpop or not.

3.     How old were you when you first got into kpop?

Oh gosh…I think I was 13 at the time.

4.     What song(s) took you a while to warm up to? 

A lot of f(x)’s earlier stuff like Nu Abo and Chu as at the time when they came out I found them to be grating and irritating. Most girl group songs take me a while to get into since I am more of a boy group kind of kpop fan.

5.     Have you ever disliked a group/idol? If so, why? (You don’t have to say who it is if you’re scared of getting hate).  

I wouldn’t say I dislike or hate a lot of kpop singers/groups but I would say I am either just not a fan of their personalities and/or their work. For girl groups, I especially am not a fan of BlackPink, Red Velvet or Girls Generation. I like one of two of their songs, but I find their voices irritating and feel like their talents are limited. I do feel this way about some boy bands too…but the one I do not care for is one that I may regret speaking ill of due to their fanbase.  

6.     What annoys you the most about kpop?   

As of right now, it would be the fans. There seems to be constant harassment of people, celebrities or other fans who have differing opinions.  Just let people like who they like and hate who they hate. What does it matter if they don’t agree with you? If you like the boy group/girl group/solo singer GREAT...leave it at that. You don’t need to harass or bully someone else into liking your faves.

7.     What do you love the most about kpop?  

The music. It brings diversity and color into my consumed media and it’s just generally enjoyable pop music fluff that I do not get from American media.

8.     Do you only listen to kpop? 

Nope. I listen to all kinds of music outside of kpop.

9.     Who are you favorite western artists (if you have any)?   

Paperwhite, The Band CAMINO, The 1975, Bad Suns, Lennon Stella, LEON, ASTR, Ralph, The Midnight

10.  How long have you been into kpop? 

Since 2003…so it’s been a while…17 years or so. (P.S. I am old and boring.)

11.  What music did you used to listen to before getting into kpop? 

Mostly American pop music, J-pop, J-rock and indie-pop.

12.  What fandom(s) were you in before getting into kpop? Are you still in them?

I was super into anime and manga back then…I was a part of the Sailor Moon fandom and I still love me some Sailor Moon. I also really loved the Backstreet Boys and still do…I am going to their concert in August (as long as it doesn’t get cancelled due to coronavirus)!

13.  Which group did you used to think was overrated but ended up loving?   

Shinee

14.  Is there a kpop song that annoys you? If so, which one?  

Uhm…there are a lot of them. Some of the songs I find annoying are: I’ve Got A Boy + Oh! + Kissing You – Girls Generation, I Don’t Know What To Do – BlackPink, Everyday – WINNER, Snapping – Chungha, Dog and Cat – TXT, Seventh Sense - NCT  (I am sorry to all of you who may love those songs)

15.  What aspects of kpop make you cringe/feel secondhand embarrassment?  

The Aegyo and overly cutesy, child-like concepts that girl groups always seem to have to participate in. Even though I know it comes from cultural differences in sexual attractiveness (I lived in Japan for years...I’ve seen it first hand), it still just creeps me out. I don’t like it in J-pop either, btw.

16.  Which concepts do you love?  

I LOVE dark, sexy, horror-like concepts that have been used by groups like VIXX and Dreamcatcher. I also love slick, retro themed songs based in the swing/jazz age (Something or Spellbound – TVXQ) or 80s nostalgia (I Feel You – The Wonder Girls).

17.  Which concepts do you hate?   

Anything overly aegyo or cutesy.

18.  If you could trade places with an idol, who would it be?  

I would totally love to be in Shim Changmin’s shoes….being part of an idol group considered gods in the kpop realm.

19.  What do you look for in a bias?  

(1) Intelligence, (2) Sassy/Funny, (3) Honest, (4) Hardworking, (5) Talented, (6) Humble

20.  Which kpop company do you hate the most?  

Cube or Pledis

21.  What are you opinions on shipping?

It’s fine as long as fans don’t push participation of it onto the idols they’re shipping.

22.  How did you get into kpop?  

I saw a Kpop Countdown show on cable TV back in 2003 where they showed BoA and TVXQ and I was hooked instantly.

23.  Has anyone ever made fun of you or looked at you weird for liking kpop?  

I mean, yes…1000x yes, I was made fun of for loving kpop all the time. Once again, I got into kpop in 2003 y’all….which was before the internet was easily accessible in my home so I felt like the only person in America who liked kpop at the time. Not even my closest friends were into it and they felt like I was just a massive weirdo for loving it as much as I did. Thankfully, I found a community online of international kpop enthusiasts like myself to talk to in around 2005 (since I finally was able to save up for a bulky ass laptop) and that helped me feel less alone and bullied.

24.  What is the cringiest thing you did when you were starting to get into kpop? 

By the time kpop came into my life, I was already a set up Weeaboo, so…really I just became a deeper version of that…I was like an embarrassing kaiju cultural appropriation combo of Weeaboo and Koreaboo. I would make my own tshirts for TVXQ and just wear them out and about. They were SO BADLY MADE because I had no idea what I was doing but I thought I was so smart and stylish at the time. I also made CDs of Jpop and Kpop for people around school to hand out at lunch...I cringe just thinking about it.

25.  How long does it take you to learn the names of each member in a group?

I’ve stopped learning members names nowadays LOL…I am too old for that shit and just don’t care enough anymore. (For past reference though, it took me about one week to remember all of TVXQ.)

26.  Are you a gg, bg, or middle/coed stan? 

Boy group stan

27.  If you could hang out with one idol, who would you hang out with? 

Shim Changmin of TVXQ….he’s my forever bias and I wanna hang out with his puppies and have a meal with him...ask him what he wants to do with the rest of his life once idol-dom is over.

28.  Who is the bias to your third favorite group? 

I guess that would be Monsta X so…uhm…it was Wonho but apparently, he isn’t in the group anymore…

29.  What name from your native language would you give your ult bias? 

What would I name Changmin in English? He already has a stage name that’s in English, which is Max. I am not sure what this question is asking LOL  (also, who the fuck still calls Changmin, Max? I thought we dropped that shit back in 2006.)

30.  Thought on fanfiction/AUs/etc?  

I think it is great and gets fans to think more creatively and figure out where their talents lay! I used to write a lot of JaeMin and HoMin fanfiction back in the day…now I write mostly Destiel (Dean and Castiel from Supernatural) fanfiction.

[shannie-writes]

10 Reasons Why...

SETH IS THE ABSOLUTE BOMB-DIGGITY AND I LOVE HIM TO THE MOON AND BACK.

Hi, my name is Chief and I may or may not be suffering from Seth Thirst™. Is there an anonymous group for IkeRev around here?

Okay, but seriously, I love Seth (if you hadn’t already figured that out). I was tagged by @otomepile to list my 10 reasons why I love my favorite IkeRev suitor. This is probably going to be longer than I anticipate and simultaneously not remotely long enough to express my love for Seth.

I’m going to be shoving this all under a cut. There are going to be pictures and I’m sorry for the long post. There will also be a few spoilers in regards to Seth, just as a heads up. Most are from Fenrir route, so if you haven’t done his route yet...my summary for Fenrir’s route is literally:

So with that, here we goooooo~~

1. His whole damn look.

Yeah, I’m starting shallow. He looks so divine. His hair is silky smooth and I would play with it for hours. His eyes are gorgeous. His eyelashes give me life. I never thought I would love a guy in a bolo tie, yet here we are. He is a tall glass of water and I am as thirsty as a man lost at sea.

Also, because I’m a sucker for aesthetics, the in-game MC and Seth having alternate color schemes for their eyes and hair? Heck me up with that. I need them in matching outfits, stat.

2. He is a strong boy.

It’s canon, y’all, this boy has the strongest arms in all of Black Army. He is unbeatable in arm wrestling. He has honed his arms for his weapon and for his bear hugs. I love bear hugs. Let this man hug you. Give him a hug. Feel those arms of his. They probably look delicious under that damnable coat covering every possible part of him. I will kiss every inch of them when I see them. Cybird, give me a CG of his arms, please.

3. Knows how to have fun.

He enjoys life to the fullest and jumps right in when there’s fun to be had. Teasing Sirius with Ray and Fenrir? Check. Teasing Ray with Fenrir and Luka? Double check.

He is a bit of a drama queen, but in the best of ways. He plays it up to act like a ham and it makes me laugh. He does it to get a laugh out of you. Appreciate it.

Also, those long-ass names he gives things? I love those. I want to collect each of them and put them in a jar for a rainy day. They are so Extra™ and so perfect.

4. He’s trendy.

Give this boy two hours and he’s got your room at the Black Army HQ up and running from a drab, empty room to the beautiful setup it has in the BG. He is the ultimate interior designer. This boy has feng shui down pat. I wouldn’t trust anyone else in the roster to do as well as a job as he does.

Not to mention attire, too? Seth is the ultimate enabler and he’s totally the type of shopping buddy to tell you “Buy it, you know you want it.” And suddenly you have five different shopping bags from four different stores and an empty bank account. But you have to admit, you look damn fine. Also, he’d totally buy you something while you’re out, just to show you how much he appreciates you. He is treating every outing with you like a date.

In a Modern AU he would be the guy who has all of the most updated gadgets to make his life as accessible to fashion trends as possible, probably sews, definitely makes a big deal about interior design.

Am I HC-ing in this post? Whoops.

5. Confident af.

Seth knows he looks good. He spends a lot of time and effort to do so. He has no fear or hesitation both on and off the battlefield. He doesn’t give a shit what other people think about him. It could be interpreted as narcissism by some, but I don’t think it goes as far as that end of the scale. He knows what works best for him and works it with confidence.

6. Emotional and Expressive.

Seth really, really cares for people. He cries when his friends and companions are hurt. He worries for your safety and comfort. His fuckin’ D: face cracks me up literally every time I see it. (Even though they mostly use it in humorous situations, so it’s kind of a given).

He may keep his true intentions secret, but he has a good heart. He wears it on his sleeve often and by god, I’m gonna take care of it.

7. Knows how to read the mood.

To go along with the point above, Seth knows when to be serious and when it’s good to break the mood with some humor. He is very sensitive to the situation and knows how to play it out to make it a positive experience in the end.

8. A subtle but heavy flirt.

I’m a sucker for a guy that will give you genuine compliments. Seth gives them in spades (ha). He is sometimes subtle with it, sometimes not, but if he thinks you’re cute, he’s going to tell you. If you look pretty, he’ll tell you. He is an open book and he is going to write you a love song and sing it to you every day for the rest of your life. He’s not saying it just to get in your pants (though it would definitely get him in mine eyyyy). He wants you to feel confident in yourself.

9. Protector of women.

Even though he doesn’t always act like a macho man, Seth understands that women can get uncomfortable around men, especially when they have something to prove. He will stand up for your innocence and safety, even if it’s from his friends, or even himself. He uses his strength and position to make sure you are as comfortable as you can be.

Not only this, (and this is where the spoiler alert comes into play) he does his damned hardest to protect you from Amon. In Fenrir’s route, he is revealed to be a magic tower spy hiding in the Black Army for information. Yet, when you show up, the king pin for what Amon is fighting for, he doesn’t pass that info forward. A different disciple shows up and essentially calls Seth out for not saying that Alice has arrived, and Seth tells him to get the fuck out of his territory. Later in route, when you are locked away in the magic tower, Seth writes out a map of the tower, passing it on to Fenrir and Ray so that they can get you out of there safely. Seth isn’t where he’s at hiding in Black Army HQ to harm you or put you in Amon’s clutches. He is there for a yet undisclosed reason, but it has nothing to do with your presence and he doesn’t want you getting tangled up in it and end up being used by Amon.

10. Feminine, but not gay.

Please don’t take this wrong. As a woman who is bisexual/polyamorous, I love seeing LGBT+ representation in my media. I think it’s great.

Seth is not. He’s not gay (obviously; he is a suitor in a dating app geared toward women). He is not bisexual.

Why do I say this?

Seth doesn’t like men. At all. He thinks they are stinky, smelly, sweaty, nasty, brutes, all the other synonyms you can think of. He wouldn’t ever find himself in a sexual/romantic relationship with another man.

It’s honestly so refreshing to see an effeminate man portrayed the way Seth is. It’s a step forward, in my opinion. He can be emotional, he can show interest in traditionally feminine things, he can express himself cutely with the way he talks, he can walk with a skip in his step, he can do all these things and more, and still come off as a super dependable, reliable, strong guy. And I love it.

Thank you all for coming to my TED Talk on Seth. I may or may not be a little ob-Seth-ed over him. Pffff. Who knows, maybe this will help give him the love in the fandom that he deserves.

For the people I would like to tag? 

@citizensofcradle

@lokiiwood

@rosierae02

@edgarbright

@lonelyshepherds

Please feel free to do it as well, if you would like! It’s nice to vent all the good things about your bias.

[tadmean-aa]

YEP, HERE WE ARE FOLKS

   so. this is a post i didn’t want to write, but here we are. if you’ve followed me for a while you know i don’t like drama / public discourse, but i genuinely have no other choice. i’ve tried to handle this privately to no avail. and while i’d appreciate the word being spread about this person, you’re welcome to block this post or blacklist the tags. i’m not here to tell you who to interact with or start a fight. i’m not here to discouse this or argue. the facts are the facts, and the facts are that this user has stolen from me repeatedly, even after being asked to stop, and has taken credit for intellectual property and an interpretation largely inspired by coping with trauma. massive drama under the cut. sorry folks. i’ve tagged it as ‘long post //’ as well for mobile users. 

     tl;dr? @cvffeinequeen (whats good?) ripped me off majorly. it’s driving me nuts. tw for ic abuse mention.

  on one hand, i thought about not writing this because it’s literally just tumblr roleplay. on the other, writing coco this way, this very specific way, has been a way to cope with my own similar struggles, and the last straw was seeing this person getting credit for their “creativity”, aka the things they blatantly ripped from me. to see someone being praised by unknowing people for taking a story that i crafted from my own hurt, a story that they’ve gutted and repurposed so they can roleplay with it instead of coming up with something of their own, was the absolute final straw. not to mention that if they’ve stolen from me and gotten away with it, it’s not unlikely they’ve taken from other sources as well. maybe someone else will come forward, idk.

   if any of the screenshots or links below are not conclusive enough, feel free to come to me and i will try to get you better ones / answer your questions. this is a long post, but i’m not about to call someone out for the first (and hopefully last) time without bringing some hard ass motherfuckin proof. my old blog (tadmean.tumblr.com, or tadmean-a.tumblr.com if the first doesn't work) is available multiple times on the wayback machine if you need to check some of these for yourself.

    for context, i found this user in the coco adel tag through an edit. i always like to see duplicates (it gets lonely being the only coco), so i clicked the url to see what their blog was like and maybe follow if they were cool with that. immediately, something stank. on closer inspection, i realized their bio was ripped directly from mine and reworded—examples below. bear in mind that they have changed their blog background color since then, which is why some of the caps dont match the current blog; it used to be this shade of red (?), now it’s a brownish pinkish color. the bio has also since changed, but i’ve included the three different versions. i sent these screenshots to a close friend the night i found this blog, as well as to another friend a couple days later / a week maybe? so that’s why some of these are discord screenshots.

BIO POSTS: ( pt 1 ) ( pt 2 ) ( pt 3 ) ( pt 4 ) ( pt 5 ) ( pt 6 ) ( pt 7 ) ( pt 8 ) ( pt 9 ) ( pt 10 ) ( pt 11 )

screenshots in hand, i instant messaged them and let them know i saw what they were doing. screenshots below:

DM CONVO: ( pt 1 ) ( pt 2 ) ( pt 3 ) ( pt 4 ) ( pt 5 ) ( pt 6 ) ( pt 7 ) ( pt 8 )

NEW BIO AT THE TIME: ( pt 1 ) ( pt 2 ) ( pt 3 ) ( pt 4 ) ( pt 5 ) ( pt 6 ) ( pt 7 ) ( pt 8 ) ( pt 9 )

BIO AS OF NOW ( 11 / 29 / 18 ): ( PT 1 ) ( PT 2 ) ( PT 3 ) ( PT 4 ) ( pt 5 ) ( pt 6 ) ( pt 7 ) ( pt 8 ) ( pt 9 )

      past this, we just agreed to be mutuals and that, i thought, was the end of it. sure, the bio wasn’t all that changed, but they’d seemed to realize the error of their ways and i was naively optimistic.

   from here, it temporarily got better. then got way worse. whether it was formatting ( x, x ) ( x, x ), ( x, x ) the names of tags ( x, x ), ( x, x ), personalized tags ( x, x ), musings posts ( x, x ) ( x, x ) (these being just a few), etc. this user has mimicked my blog to a T. but this is all just context. the thing that i’m here to talk about, however, are headcanons. i started writing coco as a way to cope with my own trauma/abuse & personality disorders; it started from the thought that if a strong character like coco can manage it all, then so can i. and it’s not like we have a whole lot of canon content for coco that might lead people to the same conclusion about her life—coco is a character that has maybe? 30 mins to an hour (being very generous) of overall content? the things i’ve written about coco is not stuff you can conclude from her canon material. period. she’s essentially an oc based on five seconds of material. if you have any doubts, remember that: coco has essentially no canon content or backstory. almost everything on my blog is a headcanon. that said:

LIST OF A FEW STOLEN HEADCANONS:

stole coco’s troubled home life as an heiress ( x ) and how she runs away later in v4 ( x ). this is the biggest one.

coco’s father has been the main antagonist of her story (way before weiss’s bg was revealed, or jacques was really even a character). this person has not only ripped off coco’s bad home life, but ripped off her father being the particular antagonist ( x , x ). they’ve also mentioned the similarity to weiss’ story but i can’t find the post. however, because this is ripped off, there’s no reasoning for why he’s the worse of coco’s parents. this is a common theme with this person: they take a headcanon and remove the fat from it so it’s not as recognizable. this also removes the context and reasoning for the headcanon.

ripped off small bits and pieces off my page: like coco barely sleeping ( x , x ), often getting detention ( x, x ) (something that’s not mentioned in their bio), sweet tooth ( x , x ), scars ( x, x )

coco’s full name being something she only gives to people she trusts ( x ,  x ) or people who would have it off her record, since it’s a reminder of her family.

oh, the best one! i posted a headcanon post specifically to literally see if they would take anything from it, and they did! blatantly! here (hair hc: x , x ) and here ( x , x, x , x). a link to my post: x and theirs: ( x, x )

    in their bio, they write that these are headcanons they’ve been writing for years. well, funny enough, lots of the things they’ve taken are things i posted and started writing about years ago. so i guess in a way, that was honest. throwback thursday!

   let me be clear: if you’ve interacted with this person, or if you didn’t notice, or you noticed but didn’t say anything, you’re not the bad guy. in these situations, the bad guy is the thief. period. i realize to some people this might seem silly, but i’m extremely sick & disabled and cannot work or really do much of anything; writing coco convincingly and making her relatable has essentially been my job, my sole motivation, for these past 3-4 years. i’ve poured hard work into this interpretation, only for someone to come along, butcher it, and claim it as their own. to you, it’s not a big deal, but to me? it’s years of work, stolen.

   i hate to make this post. i hate serious posts, i hate drama, i hate anything that might discourage someone else writing for coco. i love duplicates! i’ve never had any issues before! but this person isn’t roleplaying as coco; if anything, they seem to be roleplaying as a version of my blog. which, not cool but also, creepy.

 so, yeah. please dont send anon hate their way, this person is still a minor. but being a minor doesnt make theft okay! apparently we still needed that said out here in the rpc. thanks for reading guys, peace

[serpenthalf-moved-blog]

ROCKER’S EMERGENCY COMMISSIONS

hey loves ! if any of you have been following me you’ll know i used to do graphic commissions before i was able to find a job. sadly i really need help at the moment so i’m opening them up again. i’ll try to keep this short and to the point but : my manager refuses to give me more than 3 hours a week, since he severely over-hired too many people. it’s too late for me to look for another job, and i’m moving out asap ( hopefully the 29th / 30th since i get my paycheck the 28th ) but it depends on if i have enough saved up. i’m going to be staying with my best friend for as long as possible since her family is offering, and my living situation has had me struggling pretty bad for a while. since i came out as non-binary and started binding my chest / cut my hair etc. to present differently, my tr*nsphobic parents have been incredibly cruel to me and i’ve been avoiding being home for weeks and tiptoeing around them. my friend’s family is amazing and accepting of me, and i really need this for my mental health. but it’s difficult to do so when bills and my groceries etc. take a majority of my already tiny paychecks, and by the end of my 2 week pay periods i’ve been not eating because i can’t afford to. i hate asking for help, but i need help. my train ticket to get there is $38, which is fine, but i also need to save up to be able to stay, to afford medication refills for epilepsy, etc. since i’ll be taking time off work while i’m there. i’d love to make anyone icons / a theme bg or anything else if wanted ! if anyone is able to donate otherwise, my ko.fi is here anything helps, i just rly don’t want to be in this house any longer than i have to.

GRAPHIC EXAMPLES:

base icons :   $3 / 100

these are just blank, brightened and sharpened 100x100 icons for you to edit on your own to your liking !

edited icons : $8 / 100 +$2 with borders

these can be made any size of your choice, and includes the base icons used in case you’d like to change your psd later on. 

mobile banners / graphic + color scheme : $4 

promo graphics : $4

x x x x 

dash icons : $2 

theme backgrounds :  $10 

x x x x

character videos / ship videos : $15 ( these take like 6 hours and i’m not the best rip )

x x x 

[william-nylander]

this is a meme thing

thank you for tagging me @junkshop-disco :) :)

Rules: 15 questions, 15 mutuals

1. Are you named after anyone? my mom really like Sabrina (1995) w/ harrison ford & julia ormond when she was pregnant with me. i’ve never seen it, but i have seen the og w/ audrey.

2. When was the last time you cried? i feel like i last properly cried when i was reading this fic because there’s a scene on a ferry with quiet words and rain and damn if that doesn’t check every box for me 

3. Do you have kids? no thank you. but i was a camp counsellor once & there was this one cool kid who had like blue hair & was so kind & rad. she drew a picture of us and in it I have claws and cat ears. so that’s hanging up in my bedroom for the rest of eternity.

4. Do you use sarcasm a lot? not really? i dont have the patience for people misconstruing sarcasm. i would rather just call u a dumbo to your face.

5. What’s the first thing you notice about people? honestly whether or not they laugh at my jokes. i am joking in person 87% of the time. it’s exhausting. so ppl fall into 3 groups: 1. they laughed at my joke. they r obv cool. 2. they didn’t laugh at my joke. they obv suck. 3. they didn’t laugh at my joke BUT they seem cool/hot and now it has become my MISSION to make them laugh at my joke.

6. What’s your eye color? blue basically.

7. Scary movie or happy ending? u know how love, simon ends? that how everything should end. ferris wheels. kisses. the bleachers on in the bg. 

8. Any special talents? is being able to crochet/knit consistently for a month and then dropping it for 3 months a special talent? bc then yes. 

9. Where were you born? like most people “from toronto” i was born in mississauga and grew up in brampton.

10. What are your hobbies? i read fics all day long and then stare at my bookshelf for awhile. i write things that will never be finished. i watch hockey too much. i listen to mcelroy podcasts & sometimes others if i have the patience.  i recently bought a keyboard because i want to play piano again. 

11. Do you have any pets? i have a monster named tachou who is a little cat. usually he is yelling up a storm. right now he is asleep on my foot. (edit: at the time of posting he is running from one end of my apartment to the other)

12. What sports do you play/have you played? in middle school i was on the flag football team. i was the quarterback. we won a single game the entire season. i was also on the floor hockey team because no one else at tryout was willing to be a goalie.  in other words, i have not exercised since i was 13.

13. How tall are you? i am five foot eleven inches. i feel bad for people who stand behind me at concerts (jk i dont give a shit)

14. Favorite subject in school? history. specifically russian.

15. Dream job? once, on a red carpet, there was a woman whose job it was to lint roll the lint off harry styles’ suit. i’d like to be her. or like, a human rights lawyer.

i dont know if i have 15 mutuals left bc my blog is just pictures of auston matthews (sorry) but: @specialmountain, @inexplicableteacups, @gabithagrumbles, @lilyevansjamespotter, @phillymyers, @mallorypike, @lil-elderflowerpresse & @fromward should do this if you want to!

[beaniegara]

11 Questions

tagged both by @yaboybergara​ and @ricky-goldsworth​ which is great because that gives me 22 questions mwahhahaha thank you folks!! <3 

RULES

1. always post the rules

2. answer the questions given by the person who tagged you

3. write 11 questions of your own

4. tag 11 people you want to get to know better (or however many you want)

now, see, I don’t know what to ask........ so I’m gonna be a little shit and tag folks to pick 11 of these 22 questions and answer them too. nini and gray pls don’t sue me for reusing your questions, thank fdgkfndgfdsk I’m tagging @kaylotta, @queerunsolved, @haunted-gays, @thatmademadej, and @i-am-ghost-proof-baby <3 if yall wanna do it, of course. no pressure.

this is incredibly long (and uncomfortably honest). let’s go lesbians let’s go

first, nini’s questions:

1. How many pets have you had in your life?

one. I’ve always wanted them but my mom and I have always lived in tiny apartments and had no way to care for a pet so it wasn’t until I was 17 that we adopted a kitten!! his name was merlin and he was the laziest, moodiest lil ball of fluff I’ve ever met. I.. had to give him away a year later because we moved to a place even smaller that wouldn’t allow pets so long story short I’m scarred for life and don’t think I can ever take any more pets without feeling guilty to my bone 

this is merlin btw I love him with all my heart and he now lives in a farm. as far as I know anyway.. :(

2. Do you believe in destiny? Why?

mmm interesting question. weird, metaphysical theories aside, I don’t believe anything is set in stone per se, but I do believe that some things are just... meant to be? in a way? for example, you can’t tell me ryan and shane weren’t meant to be friends and find each other in such an unlikely place as they did. one of my mottos, completely stripped from context because it’s from a rather pretentious tv show, is “the universe is rarely so lazy”. meaning that good things happen for a reason, and that you trailed that path for that to happen. yknow what I’m saying? I can’t really explain this without writing a 10 page essay because that’s just how my gemini ass thinks 

3. If you could chose one person on the great beyond, would you take the chance to talk to them? 

you mean someone who has passed away? oh yeah, I would talk to my grandmother. she was raising me and died when she was 4 and that changed not only my entirely life but our whole extended family dynamic... so many questions.

4. From all your hobbies, which one would you love to make a living of?

oh man, writing. I’ve been dreaming of being a writer ever since I was 9 or something. never panned out but that would certainly be the dream. if I could work with videos, subtitling, tv shows, cinema etc that would also be dope as hell!

5. What’s your favorite color palette to wear?

fkgjfsdgiusfdksd I have no fashion sense whatsoever, idk? I do like to wear dark clothes (because weight..) and reds (because pale).

6. What’s your opinion on queerbaiting?

I don’t have the time for it. for starters, it’s something that usually comes from people with very poor writing skills that can’t come up with plots interesting enough to keep viewers/readers hooked in. that already says something. no offense to anyone who is a fan of shows like these, but when it’s mostly written by white men I just don’t have any high hopes for it. you can ask flavs what my reaction was like when I realized the character I had headcanon’ed as wlw in hannibal was actually a wlw. I couldn’t believe it, because what???? since when does that happen, especially in a show run by a white man??? kjdfghsjgd 

I think this is part of a bigger conversation but my point is, don’t fall for it. I know it’s all part of the fight for representation, asking big names to produce big shows with lgbtq+ characters in it and so on, but for the love of god, watch something else too!!!! let GOT rot and die!!!!!!!!! look up different, smaller, cheaper shows, that’s where you find lgbtq+ content creators!!!!!! there’s so many wlw webseries out there, you wouldn’t believe it. you have a choice. don’t give any more of your time and love and word-of-mouth to shows/movies that clearly have no interest in being more diverse. they don’t deserve you. 

and that’s not to say any of it is on us. quite on the contrary, they’re using us. but aside from calling out their bullshit, we do have a chance to boost lgbtq+ content creators. don’t let them fool you into thinking they’re doing you any favors, or that they’re our last chance so we should be paying attention to what they’re doing/saying. fuck them!!!! you can’t queerbait me because I don’t trust you or give you the chance to do it. and you can shove your very straight, very white shows where the sun doesn’t shine, @ hollywood.  

7. Is there a language you would love to speak?

french and korean, mostly. I can understand a little bit of both, but I really wish I was fluent :( oh, will to live and learn, where art thou...

8. Do you have, like, a dream so wild you think it’s impossible?

kjgnsfdkjhjjs having enough money to support myself and my mother??? I don’t have any big, wild dreams, I think. just.......... living comfortably would be a+  

9. How many AUs of your own life do you have in your head?

oh man. I keep thinking about living somewhere in idk iceland or scotland just like... tending goats or something. that’s the most comfortable version of myself I can think of.

I also like to imagine if I could handle being a film director, because that sounds like fun. maybe a screenwriter? anything creative in films, really. 

there’s also the unattainable dream of having a wife and idk maybe adopting a kid? and we’d just. support each other. and love each other. and that’s just. I. [cries]

I like to think how things would be if I were actually hot and not socially awkward.. I’d be someone completely different, basically lol 

10. If you were to meet your younger self, do you think they would think you cool or not?

oh god, younger me would hate present me D: I had such high hopes for myself, I had lots of dreams lol never in a million years did I think I’d be where I am today...

11. Not a question, but please add something postive about yourself, something that you love about you.

IDJFSSIODUGSDFKGDSJ IT’S LIKE YOU KNEW I’D BE A NEGATIVE FUCK, NINI. I................................ I like that I have an easy time with languages? or with classes in general. I like to learn from people, I’m just really unmotivated to leave the house lol 

now onto gray’s q’s:

1. What’s your favourite music video of all time?

straight-up impossible questions right out of the gate huh I SEE YOU, GRAY. I SEE YOU kjdfgjfsdhgkdsjfs

I’ll have to go with a few,

“prototype” by viktoria modesta is just GORGEOUS. I can’t get over this video & song and it’s been years.

“jackpot” by block b looks creepy as shit but the context makes it such a clever yet fun video. take into account that these guys were screwed over by the kpop company that created the group, and that the lyrics talk about hitting jackpot in an industry that’s savage to say the least. to me this video is a visual representation of what a dangerous trap entertainment companies are in the kpop industry, and it also ties in with the groups’ story of being made into dolls by a company and then telling them to fuck off in the end lol 

“treat me like your mother” by the dead weather. I don’t know why I just love it. (cw: gun violence)

“emperor’s new clothes” by panic! at the disco. I MEAN, LOOK AT IT.

“manyo maash” by puer kim. I just love the aesthetic?

honorable mention: “tick tick boom” by the hives because that’s a banger. ba dum tssss.

2. What’s a favourite memory of yours?

I have plenty of good memories, thank god. I think one of my favorites is just hanging out with my friends in 2008-9; one of their older brothers was driving us around town, we were listening to the white stripes at full volume, singing along, all sitting pressed up close together in his shitty car. man, my teenage years would’ve been fantastic if I had stayed there with them!! 

3. Do you play video games? If so, which one’s your favourite?

I DO!!! I mean, not as much as I’d like because a) no money to spare on games/consoles, and b) I suck at basically everything. but I’m obsessed with paladins these days, and I’m also a big fan of LOTRO. I like horror games--mostly the resident evil and silent hill type--and fps. I grew up playing some tomb raider, medal of honor, resident evil... oh, those were the days. 

4. How did you first get into [your fandom of choice]?

with bfu it was that kind of thing where I’d see a meme or two cross my dash and it was always this ridiculous screenshot, or those “that’s it, that’s the show” kinda things with dozens of thousands of notes... until one day I was incredibly anxious, and I needed to watch something or I’d never finish the assignments I had for college. so I just thought “oh hey I should check out that unsolved thing people like so much, it’s buzzfeed so it’s probably good bg noise to work with” lol and it did work, and I did finish my assignments, and that means that I first watched the show barely paying any attention to it because I was busy doing something else. but ryan’s and shane’s voices helped me relax and to this day they still help a lot with my anxiety, to the point that I need to keep coming back every minute or so during episodes because I get distracted just listening to their voices and not absorbing a word lol

5. How did you first get into fandom in general?

uhh.. well, I was a big “pottermaniac” (that’s how I called it) since I was 9, but that was before I realized fandom was a Thing on the internet too. I remember when I was maybe 10 or 11, I entered a chatroom (god, those were wild) just in time to see someone saying in all caps HARRY POTTER IS GREAT AND YOU’RE ALL DUMB FOR NOT SEEING IT or something fkdsjgfdugfsdk and it was this girl using the nickname fawkes. she was older than me, I think that 15 or something, and we exchanged addresses (!!! how am I alive!!!) and were pen pals for a while. but it took me so fucking long to actually find the fandom online that I think my first brush with it was with the arctic monkeys forum I found online in 2008, where I mistakenly said I liked “the muse” and people laughed at me so I never went back to it lol then in 2010 I found out about kpop and that’s when I really dived head-first into fandom life. took me long enough (tbf I was very against the notion of being a “fan” because I was an idiot).

6. What’s at the top of your bucket list?

great fucking question. no idea. I guess.. traveling overseas? if we’re talking wild, distant things. but closer to my reality, getting a job that pays me at least the minimum wage disjgdfgkfsdk #fuckinternships

7. What’s something not many people know about you?

I love dancing and miss it like hell.

8. What’s your favourite medium for storytelling - movie, book, television, musical, comic, internet video, video game, something else? Why that medium?

ohhhhhhh this is an interesting question. as much as I love writing, and think that’s one of the best things we humans have ever come up with, I do love.. musicals? not necessarily theater--although that’s great and I’d sell my soul to see chicago live--but I love the idea of telling stories through music. I really wish we could bring back the custom of telling stories orally, and through music, and that we could as society agree that collective singing is beautiful and should be reintroduced in our day-to-day lives. sure listening to (1) artist singing is great but hAVE YOU TRIED SINGING ALONG DURING A CONCERT WHERE EVERYONE ELSE IS SINGING TOO? best fucking feeling in the world. 

we had two bands in brazil, in different periods of time, that were so incredibly famous they’re still cornerstones in our music history. one was legião urbana, some folk-ey rock band that had a couple of songs telling these really long stories that I LOVE with all my heart. faroeste caboclo is our bohemian rhapsody, most people my age or older know the lyrics to it. and mamonas assassinas was this comical (?) rock band that sang dumb, fun songs that usually told stories too and that was the best. I miss that kinda thing. 

9. What’s your favourite food?

red meat, mainly churrasco. but I also can’t live without chocolate milk AND the whopper. capitalism has me by the stomach.

10. Do you have a joke to share?

fjgfsdgskfdgfsk I don’t.. it’s been so long since I last tried telling a joke, I don’t think I know any?

11. What song/artist helped you through your struggles?

pitty has been a big part of my life for some 14-odd years now. “be ok” by ingrid michaelson and “starlight” by muse were my anthems when depression hit hard during my teenage years. the white stripes has also been a constant, with gems like “blue orchid” and “a martyr for my love for you” turning into sort of theme songs for certain parts of my life. choi sam helped me through college. and even though they were a huge disappointment to the point that I stopped listening to them altogether, block b gave me a good 4 or 5 years of distraction from life.

[transtarks]

FINALLY i’ve finished @actualbird‘s christmas present! since they live on the other side of the world from me and sending them a physical present would cost both my life savings and my firstborn, and i don’t know how to draw and i’m in a writer’s slump at the moment AND i’ve already made them a mix, i decided to put together the soundtrack i had in my head for their fic, is this a forest? ‘cuz there sure is a lot of pine (yes i know there’s a comma instead of a question mark in the picture but i’m too tired to go fix it). the art is by @savedbythemell (xx)! also, since the fic hasn’t been finished yet, this is technically a work in progress. merry christmas, bird! <3

unfortunately, spotify didn’t have a couple of the songs on the soundtrack so i made the playlist on youtube. 

check out the soundtrack here!

the soundtrack explanation is under the cut. 

Ayuz - Rico Blanco

Second chapter. Michael finds that song on spotify, goes to school listening to it. Camera shows him listening to it at his desk in his room or something, his foot tapping to it as his face morphs into a pleased expression. As the first verse plays, you see him texting Jeremy on his phone. Jeremy is asking him where he is, probably, because for some fucking reason Jeremy is early to school. He has a text convo with Jeremy that gives some insight to their relationship with each other and how Michael is pining before the chorus hits, Michael huffs out a sigh, shoves his phone in his pocket, swings his backpack over his shoulder, and heads out the door. Cut to him in school, the camera focused on his back as he does his little dance-walk through the hallways, people passing by maybe kind of looking at him strangely. The song fades as he comes into contact with Jeremy at the lunch table, sound focused on Michael singing it.

Your Universe - Rico Blanco

End of second chapter. Even though Michael doesn’t find this song until he’s home after being at Jeremy’s, it still plays as we’re shown them hanging out and havin’ a good time. When we finally see Michael at home, he’s in bed with his headphones on, laying on his stomach and staring at texts from Jeremy again, face expressionless. He sighs and sets his phone down, rolls onto his back, digs the heels of his hands into his eyes and the camera is looking down on him. As it pulls farther away from him, the scene fades out with the music, “I’ll always be the lucky one.”

Hope You Do - Cinders

End of chapter three. The song comes in, Jeremy saying, “What are gagos for, right?” and Michael laughing in response. The guitar comes in as Jeremy heads up to the kitchen to get the brownies for Nikki. Lyrics start, Michael leans in the hallway and watches Jeremy and Nikki with a small but sad smile on his face. Nikki looks at him, and in the silence between, “i want your heart and i hope you want mine to, but it’s just so hard to tell you,” and “but I hope you do,” Michael shrugs, and the camera immediately cuts from him to Jeremy’s face as he talks to Nikki. The scene fades out. Episode ends.

Henrietta - The Fratellis

Beginning of chapter four. The episode starts out silent with Jeremy in class, where he finds out that Christine has been assigned his partner for their English project. He seems to be fine, but the second that he hears Christine is his partner, the smile falls from his face, his eyes widen, and he looks over at Christine who’s looking back at him with a smile and a wave. The guitar at the very beginning of the song starts as he looks over at her, and you can see the color drain from his face as the camera switches to show Christine smiling at him. She waves, and the camera flicks back to Jeremy right as the little, “Hello!” comes in. Cut to a bird’s eye view of Jeremy sulking through the hallways on the way to lunch, then cut to Michael at their lunch table waiting for Jeremy to join him. Jeremy sits down and the song cuts off right before the lyrics can start. Queue Jeremy screaming into his backpack. That’s all that plays of this song.

Landslide - Oh Wonder

End of chapter four. Okay, so like, the thing with this chapter is that in all the parts where it says “The thing about [character name] is,” I imagine it as Michael like, writing this in a journal to himself. Like throughout the episode, we’d hear Michael’s voiceover saying the whole “Here’s the thing about Jeremy,” but since it’s Michael writing, there would be “I”s and “Me”s instead of “he”s and “him”s when referring to Michael because, well, he’s referring to himself so you get it. So we hear Michael’s voiceover throughout the episode doing that, and for the last one—the one about Christine—we cut to Michael in his bed writing this in some journal he’s never used before because he’s always thought the whole write out your feelings coping mechanism was bullshit but he’s sort of desperate at this point. So we cut to the, “My point is, Christine, should she ever like Jeremy back—” and this song is playing. The weird pulsing sound at the beginning started playing when Jeremy laid his head on Michael’s shoulder. So the first verse is playing as he’s talking over it while writing, and then the chorus hits and he just kind of shakes his head and groans and closes the journal and lays down, tries to go to sleep. The episode fades out.

Nothing Lasts - Bedroom

K, so, this episode (chapter 5) begins with no music, and that lasts until after the incident where Michael tries to text Jeremy while he’s at the mall. Then this song starts playing as confusion comes to Michael’s face, wondering why Jeremy won’t reply to him. Transfer into a, like, semi-montage with this song playing in the BG of all the incidents where Michael is trying to get Jeremy’s attention and failing. It cuts off abruptly when the camera quickly cuts from Michael looking all antsy in the hallway to a closeup of their hands as Michael grabs Jeremy’s wrist.

Some Boys (Demo) - Death Cab For Cutie

Okay so since this song starts out kind of abrupt, like SUDDENLY IMMEDIATELY THERE’S A GUITAR y’know, I’d change it so that it fades in. This is what plays when Michael has his panic attack in the bathroom! It doesn’t seem fitting at first but like, the lyrics are p good for it and also if you think about it like I am, it’s pretty fitting. So like, Jeremy leaves, the door closes. The song starts fading in as Michael locks it. We see him stare at the door handle, see his eyes well up, and see him sink to the edge of the tub. Then the camera changes to a bird’s eye view of the bathroom and like, we cycle through seeing Michael in the tub, at the sink staring in the mirror, curled into a ball against the door, hyperventilating in the middle of the room with his hands in his hair, and then finally leaving when “some boys don’t know how to love” is sung. The song fades out as the camera cuts to Michael backing out of the driveway and driving off, the screen fading to black as well.

Oo - Up Dharma Down

This is here for obvious reasons. It’s the song that comes on Michael’s spotify when he’s smoking and going through burning shit Jeremy’s given him. It plays again at the end of the episode from his headphones, but then fades in louder as the episode closes out of the hospital room with Michael sitting next to Jeremy’s bed.

Midnight Movies - Saint Motel

Chapter 6 opening. Michael and Jeremy are back at school, it seems like things are more or less okay between them. We focus on Michael in a sort of montage as he goes through a couple weeks of interacting with Jeremy and doing his best to make things normal again, but we always see him falter when Jeremy isn’t looking or when one of the kids from the squip squad talks to him. At one point, we see one of the kids asking Michael if he wants to come hang out with them; the music quiets down just enough to we catch the gist of the exchange. When the music officially fades out, it’s when the camera pans down on Michael trying to light his cigarette by the bleachers after having been asked to hang out and Christine approaches.

O Pag-ibig - Bailey May and Ylona Garcia

This is playing on Michael’s car stereo while they’re on the way back to Jeremy’s house after school. I think it’d play again at the end of the episode while Michael is thinking about how everything is going to be okay after Jeremy snuggled him in his sleep.

Green Tea - Observer Drift

Chapter 7, after everyone sits down at lunch with Michael and he starts to get a little overwhelmed. Christine offers to watch a dog video with him. The song starts playing as Michael leans over to watch it, a smile forming on his face. Jeremy’s fingers are touching his wrist, the table is laughing, and Michael looks a bit more content now. We see Christine sneak a glance at him as she shows him the video, her own smile mirroring his own. It’s soft and resembles something like pride.

Cut To The Feeling - Carly Rae Jepsen

Michael picks Jeremy and Christine up, Christine plays this song in the car on the way to the arcade.

Sporting Chance - Observer Drift

The very end of this episode as Michael watches Jeremy head over to the air hockey table. Seriously the lyrics in this fuck me up. Make a list of all your friends— close your eyes and walk away from me. I couldn’t ask you this just one time; did you write me down? Doesn’t matter how many we have, what matters is how much they care. The episode fades out with this song.

Ligaya - Eraserheads

The only song in chapter 8. Michael’s guitar cover of this at the end of the chapter fades into the actual song as the episode closes.

audioscan - ambient noise transformed into music

Chapter 9 opens up with Michael staring at the shelf of condoms in front of him at 7Eleven, this playing on his headphones. (Thanks, Jenna.)

Major Tom - Peter Schilling

Really this is just strictly for comedic purposes/background noise. This is what’s playing on the store’s speakers after Michael takes his headphones off and starts to (accidentally) text Rich. It’s got a weird floaty feeling to it and I imagine it’d be, like, subconsciously calming to hear while having a crisis in a 7Eleven.

Start Somewhere - A Yawn Worth Yelling

Okay, so like, Major Tom ends and after Michael talks to the cashier and goes to leave the store, he stops outside and takes a deep breath. This wasn’t written in the chapter but it’s what I’m imagining if this were a TV show. This song starts playing as he exits the store, and he stops outside for a second to get his bearings. The drums kick in right as Michael takes a deep breath, gets this Well, guess I’m really fucking doing this look on his face, and continues to march towards his car. We see him drive away, and the episode cuts to the next day or something where we see Michael sitting and making the flowchart of this chapter. The song fades out.

Silakbo - Milesexperience

The song that comes on Michael’s Spotify right as he’s about to confess to Jeremy in his car.

Soft Clouds - Parks, Squares and Alleys

Plays right as Jeremy says the last words of the chapter, and the camera pans out and above the car up into the sky before the lyrics can start. The episode ends.