#I have a thing for pathetic male leads who act very cool except when the topic at hand is their crush

[shiina-a]

I can't stop thinking in how Hua Cheng's feelings must have been evolved during tgcf.

First of all he was pretty clear that he loved Xie Lian since before dying and he knew the emotion was too hard to him to keep it to himself, so he made a point in trying to maintain a certain distance with Xie Lian while also trying to be near enough, knowing himself too well to know he surely will get carried away if he didn't maintain that distance.

He did it fairly well during a time but Xie Lian is obviously not the kind of person who was agreeable to that plan, and by the end of the Banyue arc that plan was a lost cause. Both of them got too familiar and Hua Cheng got addicted to that closeness.

From that point Hua Cheng gave little steps. I don't think he expected for his feelings to be reciprocal, if nothing I think he was sure they weren't at all, but he probably found himself wanting more and more.

It helped that Xie Lian is, well, very naive in these matters so he didn't think too hard in that direction when Hua Cheng was doing this or that. Hua Cheng probably felt encouraged to keep pushing and pushing the invisible boundary he himself put between him and Xie Lian because none of those innocent acts of flirting met a negative reaction.

There were small cracks here and there, like the kisses or that proposal, but nothing too severe, nothing that actually broke that delicate balance. If nothing he found that Xie Lian and him became closer and closer, sharing moments of vulnerability, Hua Cheng even sharing his feelings with him even if censoring who he was talking about so he got braver and...

The delicate balance got destroyed in that one cave.

It's interesting to see someone so smug fighting against feelings of inferiority that are almost as old as him.

It's also weird to see a moment of raw weakness in Hua Cheng because he was always the kind of guy who was too strong for his own good, if not physically, mentally. We are talking about the same guy who at 10 years old decided that if he was going to die he might as well burn the city down in the process.

But in his moment he wasn't like that, he tried to stop Xie Lian from reject him even. Someone who would confront the ugly truths of the world willingly since he was a child would hide from something like that.

And, oh well, let's say it's very good that he wasn't Icarus after all.

[lady-of-lyon]

So, I made one post a while back about how awesomely feminist the show Wild Kratts was, with how its two main female characters were women of color in engineering and deserving roles of power, female villains who weren’t motivated by spite or quest for youth, etc, but today I wanted to talk about something slightly different, that I’ve wanted to cover for a while now, because I also think it’s very good - and that’s how the show portrays masculinity, in a way that’s really positive!

First, we have our two main characters, Chris and Martin Kratt. Keep in mind these two are basically self-inserts - and there are plenty of creators, especially males, who have used self-insert characters in really scummy ways - all I have to say is Powerpuff Girls reboot and you know exactly what I’m talking about. Even if they weren’t literal self-inserts, male characters, superheroes especially, oftentimes serve the male power fantasy, being just the strong, stoic, all-powerful person so many boys are told they’re supposed to be. I could get into a whole discussion about how the male power fantasy is present even when males are not (ever look through a fashion magazine and wonder why there are so few men? Sure, part of it is that the industry thrives off exploiting women’s insecurities, and men aren’t as concerned for their appearance, but another part of it is so that the guy, looking through it, can feel like he has no competition for these women - there’s a reason so many comedians have jokes about fashion magazines being their sexual awakening as kids. It’s really scummy) but that’s not what this is about. So, the bros had every opportunity to do just that - make themselves these traditional heroes who aren’t actually really good role models, like batman or what have you. It’s certainly not uncommon for celebrity cartoons to do stuff like that. But Martin and Chris chose a different approach. They’re pretty strong standouts for positive masculinity. They’re openly affectionate - both with eachother as brothers, and with their friends. They cry, sometimes over little things - most of the time when big superheroes cry, it’s ‘cause they lost the girl they loved or their mentor or something like that, only in the big, most agonizing moments do they shed a tear. But here, Chris or Martin will cry just because they’ve had a bad day, or because they’re overwhelmed and overjoyed that someone named a mantis after them! In a lot of shows or movies when a guy cries over something little, it’s usually played for laughs, or to emasculate him, but here it’s casual without being unreasonable or overdone. The brothers cry just ad much, maybe even more (haven’t gone back and counted or anything) as the girls do. Not to mention, it’s a very nice depiction of a loving, healthy sibling relationship. As the youngest sibling myself, it’s refreshing to see a pair who don’t abuse eachother with noogies or cruel and snarky remarks. When they do fight, it’s never a screaming match, and also because they had a conflict of interest or disagreed over a fact, not because, say, one of them stole the other’s shirt or is neglecting the other’s feelings. Kids, being very impressionable, get exposed to a lot of abusive sibling relationships played as normal in media, and start thinking this is how siblings are and should act. For instance, my sister (who is now my best friend and has gotten over all these bad habits over time) when she was younger watched a lot of Kim Possible, a show that is great, but has a bad family dynamic with Kim and her little siblings. The “tweebs” as she calls them are always irresponsible, destructive, and making Kim annoyed to no end. My older brother was one of the most polite, reserved, kind little kids, but she still treated him like he was a brat and a nuisance, because that’s what shows like Kim Possible taught her little brothers were. Additionally, I was always treated like a spoiled crybaby who just wanted attention and got away with everything - I was not any of those things, ever, but that’s what shows teach you little sisters are. Sure, Wild Kratts has a smidge of that, with Chris seemingly being the stereotype of the know-it-all little sibling, but instead of being constantly looked town upon for being too “perfect” like with Hailey Long in American Dragon, Martin often praises his brother for his abilities. Sure, Martin gets annoyed when Chris tries to correct him on things, like in the episode Wolf Hawks, but everyone else does too, so it feels more like a take-down of mansplaining than a sibling spat.

I talked too in the feminist post about how refreshing it is that Chris and Martin more or less willingly put themselves under the authority of Koki and Aviva, two women of color. I don’t think it’s possible to say any one character is the “leader,” they all work as a evenly balanced team, but it’s safe to say that Koki and Aviva make the more responsible decisions. The bros try to get out of their calls a few times, but the show plays it more like they’re being irresponsible, and less like they’re renegade cool dudes who don’t take nothing from nobody, especially not two girls. They are pretty much always punished via karma for their reckless choices, most especially in To Touch a Hummingbird, where their arrogant attitudes blow up in their faces rather spectacularly. We also never see the narrative most present in sitcoms, where the male leads mess up and go out of their way to cover it up and ultimately gets away with it - after all, you have to root for them, right, because sure they messed up and had no consequences, but aren’t they just so lovable? No, here Martin and Chris always have to fix their wrongdoing, and it’s always deserved when they get comeuppance. Another aspect of the show I like is that, many times, when the bros get captured or are in peril, they are saved by the women - and most refreshing of all, there’s never a moment of “wink wink nudge nudge wow I can’t believe I had to be rescued by a GIRL” or even “wow you saved me you’re pretty good honey guess I shouldn’t have underestimated you, you go girl!” No, when the girls save them, it’s just - you know, relief? Because they were saved? It’s never a scenario played as an exception, or any more dire than when the bros need to rescue eachother. The bros are genuinely happy to have them as teammates. The show even did the standard “boys vs girls” episode in the form of When Fish Fly - but instead of being actually girls vs. boys, it’s engineers vs. adventurers. There’s nothing really gendered about it - the girls happen to be engineers, and the boys happen to be adventurers. And the episode doesn’t end with the boys being “wow gosh darn I shouldn’t have doubted you girls are better at everything,” it’s a mutual agreement that both parties have hard jobs. Basically, the bros are very naturally respectful of women. That plays more into their feminist narrative too, but either way, it’s refreshing.

Then, we have Jimmy! Jimmy, the lovable gamerboy pizza man. At first glance Jimmy seems like the stereotypical cowardly, pathetic, emasculated loser. He’s frightened of most things, as of yet has no power suit, and he BAKES for crying out loud! But none of these things are framed as terribly bad traits. Sure, we laugh when he screams and runs from an animal, but though it happens over and over, the crew doesn’t get sick of it. They don’t berate him or belittle him because he’s so gosh darn cowardly. There’s a great scene in Rattlesnake Crystal where Jimmy has to deliver something to the bros alone, in the middle of a spooky desert. He is terrified the whole time, sprinting off after he delivers the goods. When Martin and Chris run into him, they don’t laugh at him for being spooked, they just greet and then bid fair well to their friend. To them, this is just Jimmy, and there’s nothing wrong with it. Jimmy isn’t coddled, but he is reassured many times that he’s a valuable member of the team. I love that little message, that you’re just as important of a person even if you can’t do as much or have greater limits. When his friends do try to get him over his fears, it’s not because they have to, that the day will somehow be ruined by Jimmy’s incompetence p, but because they’re his friends, and want him to experience fun and wonderful things that he would otherwise miss out on. But what Jimmy CAN do is just as important! Jimmy is a gamer, which in a lot of shows, is portrayed as a lazy, useless, mindless hobby. But here, because he plays video games, it makes him essential for piloting the ship and teleporting important items. There’s always the joke that video games improves your hand/eye coordination, but recent studies have shown it has much better effects. It can make you much better at keeping track of multiple moving objects and processing technical but variable information- two traits which, fittingly enough, are really really important for air traffic controllers and airplane pilots! He also demonstrates a lot more courage behind the wheel of the Tortuga, which makes sense - in an impersonal setting, he would have more sense of calm and control and courage, because it’s so similar to a video game world. It’s not all too different with how I feel more emboldened to pick fights with people on the internet, but get crazy anxious if a real person so much as looks at me. So Jimmy’s love of video games isn’t because he’s irresponsible, it has real benefits. A quick last point - Jimmy also eats a lot, but they thankfully don’t make him fat or greedy or anything like that. He never takes food from people, he actually bakes, and shares it with others! Having the baker be a boy is a lovely touch.

I might do another post about the toxic masculinity of the two villains, (or four villains, I guess, if I wanna discuss the minions) but I’ve got other work to do, and this post is long enough already, so I’ll get around to it later. I’ll sum it up with this - Wild Kratts is a show that teaches boys it’s not only ok to be kind, but essential. The brothers protect defenseless animals, advocate for things “icky” and “weird,” like bugs or snakes or worms - not because they’re boys, and boys like icky things, but because they genuinely see the beauty in all life, and are encouraging us to slow down and do the same. The Wild Kratts are heroes who save the world not by being the strongest or smartest or coolest, but by looking after those who are exploited and vulnerable, who are essential to the world, even if they can’t always do everything. In Wild Kratts the only weaknesses a man can have isn’t what he can’t do, but what he does do that he shouldn’t have. Sure, it’s a cute show about two funny guys who have cool powers, but it’s also a show about accountability, compassion, respect and trust. The show says “boys will be boys” in all the right ways - Martin is a lovable goof with a heart of gold, but he still has to get his act together when he messes up, and he’s still creative and smart and openly sensitive. Chris is a bit of a know-it-all show-off, but he can also mess up as much as his brother, and is still bold, brave, adventurous, and can put his money where his mouth is. Jimmy is a cowardly, napping, eating machine video-gamer, but he’s still a valued member of the team, has incredible skills and talents, and will always help his friends, even if he is really, really scared. It is so important to have role models like these, in a world dominated by unhealthy machismo. The Wild Kratts are heroes who save the world - both animated, and real.

All they need now is a canon queer character, and I’ll stan them forever! My money’s on Aviva!!

[lilyhoshikawa]

Henlo I saw you mention something about uuhhhhh passionate Aoi Zaizen rant, could I get one of those please

I’m so upset. I’m so angry. I have so many emotions. SO many times they did this girl dirty, so many times!!

This was widely talked abt right after it happened but I just got done rewatching the blue angel vs specter duel and I am filled with a renewed anger the likes of which has never been known. The absolute atrocity of that duel’s ending

Just to clarify, everything in that duel supported Aoi winning. It was the natural progression of her character arc, from her initial weakness allowing specter to brainwash her into Hanoi’s weapon, she eventually grew out of her days of simply being an idol to seek the attention her brother didn’t give her, something the Vrains writers consistently frame as inherently selfish and not a completely natural reaction for a teenager in her situation to have. But regardless, she’s a “selfish” idol seeking attention, she ends up being used by bad people, she gets saved by Playmaker, she learns more about him, fights by his side and decides she wants to start fighting for a cause. She defeats Vaira in the ultimate moment symbolizing her character growth. She’s no longer just an idol being fawned over by her fans, she is a hero who protects Link Vrains

Cue specter duel. The start is fine. This shitty, arrogant dickwad who already hurt Aoi goads her into a duel. He’s a jackass to her all the way through. But as the duel progresses, she learns about him- like her, he was lonely, struggling with no friends and no one to give him warmth and attention. Like her, he simply needs to be set on the right path. Suddenly her anger toward him shifts to empathy as she declares she is fighting to save him, which he mocks of course. She ends up in the typical Yugioh hero predicament of “how do I get out of this”, and pulls out a new ace monster that FINALLY causes specter to act SURPRISED for once in the duel, for once not somehow just predicting all her strategies. She turns the duel around and strikes the killing blow.

Only… that doesn’t happen. Specter pulls some bullshit, turns it around, and wins, making sure to burn up the book that symbolized Aoi’s decision to fight in the first place. And to rub it in even MORE, he calls her “the pathetic girl who couldn’t become a blue angel”, declaring he will “take everything from her”.

And then, suddenly… the context of all of that changes. The mockery specter has been giving her the whole duel goes from becoming the typical villainous arrogance to a much more cruel situation, the person already determined by the writers to win the duel taking all the time he has to rub in how superior he is to the girl who actually bothered to grow as a person. It’s as if specter is some self-insert of a misogynistic male anime fan who knows no girl can stand against him no matter how much better written she is, because he has the power of writers’ bias on his side.

Aoi is slammed into a building and lands face-first on the ground completely decimated. The next couple shots feature specter standing over her grinning and smirking as he makes comments about how pathetic and weak she is. She is clearly unconscious and can’t hear them. This is for the audience.

So alright, I hear you saying, maybe that’s just meant as a “kick the dog” moment; show us how evil specter really is and why it’s the wrong idea to try to sympathize with him. Aoi tried that and she couldn’t do it, so it means some people are beyond saving. Now I’d still have a problem with throwing Aoi under the bus to make that point, but whatever, narratively it’s sound reasoning. Only what’s the next thing that happens? He duels Playmaker, and we learn he’s a Lost Incident victim. We hear his backstory and are shown him as a sad child, motivating us to sympathize with him.

It doesn’t stop there. Specter doesn’t mock Playmaker like he did Blue Angel, naturally, because Playmaker is cool and respectable. So what does he do instead? Mocks Aoi some more! He draws constant reference to how Aoi fell for his various strategies. Now he does later start mocking Playmaker, and I get that, but that leads into another point: it’s not because Playmaker is “weak” but because he’s “too heroic”. Yusaku is able to quickly disarm Specter’s deck and is ready to finish him off before he pulls out his hostage, Akira, who ALSO gets to die a reasonable death. Everyone who dies in the Tower of Hanoi arc, with the exception of Aoi and perhaps Ema (another girl, funny that) are treated with respect as they die. Yusaku easily beats the person who gave Aoi so much trouble.

Revolver, right before his duel with Go, notes Aoi’s fate, saying “my subordinate, Specter, defeated her”. His subordinate. Not even the main bad guy. She doesn’t get the level of respect of Go, the guy who would go on to become an antagonist while she remained (on paper anyway) one of the main trio.

Nobody watched Aoi’s duel with Specter, no one commented on her courage or bravery or how hard she fought or cried when she was defeated, not like with Go. She didn’t get to reveal some big strategy of a major villain and disappear giving Playmaker one last cool remark. No, she got completely outsmarted and knocked unconscious on her face so that a man could stand over her body and insult her.

In season 2 it is obvious no one knows what to do with Aoi. She’s thrown in 800 directions to serve whatever role she’s needed for, most often losing for some reason or another. She keeps having these moments of determination and character growth where she makes a “big decision” and resolves to fight, but it never really works out for her, no matter the cause. Whenever they need someone to lose, she’s there. The Blue Angel avatar, based on her childhood hero, which represents her desire to bring people together? Gone, tossed away, replaced by Ghost Girl’s Apprentice. Now that that’s done though, now we need her for something else, you see, we’ve got a Girl Ignis and we don’t wanna write another girl, we already overdid ourselves writing the two we do have. Let’s just use Aoi instead and shoehorn in a relationship with a barely existent character who just happens to be part of her backstory as her oldest and most important friend, a thing that may contradict her entire character’s driving motivation from season one, but hey, fuck season one.

In season 3 she is glued to her brother’s side. She does less than nothing. She is fodder to be defeated by Ai and nothing more. They don’t want to bother giving her a duel of her own (if they did I’m sure she’d lose to Roboppi and not even Ai himself) so she duels with Akira. Akira sucks shit and his deck is trash so Aoi, with her Marincess deck, carries him. Akira is praised for being strong and cool. Aoi loses to Ai due to an incredibly situational counter. I’m so tired.

Every character Ai kills is treated with some respect by him. He mourns the loss of Go, who murdered one of the Ignis he’s fighting to avenge. Meanwhile? He repeatedly mocks Aoi during the duel. She starts out fighting Ai with all her might, but eventually comes to realize his sadness and loneliness after losing his Ignis friends. She tries to empathize with him, telling him she can relate, because she too lost Aqua. Ai gets angry that she thinks her loneliness is the same as his. When she announces her desire to protect her brother, Ai begins repeatedly mocking her using this. He ignores Akira entirely, zeroing in completely on Aoi and continuously mocking her about her chances of winning, acting superior, knowing he’ll be able to take her bother from her, take everything from her, and leave her all alone.

Say… does this sound familiar to anyone?

Ai erases Akira but “spares” Aoi, standing over her as she lays collapsed and soaked on the floor, mocking her by telling her how she now has to live with herself after failing to save her brother.

No, seriously… is this familiar to anyone?

It’s almost as though… aggressive, patronizing misogyny is built intrinsically into Aoi’s character, and she’s used as a vessel for toxic and abusive ideas about men who are “hurting” and how “soft, immature” women who profess to understand them or have empathy for them are naive idiots deserving to be beaten and mocked

Misogyny isn’t just a part of Aoi’s arc, it is built into the very philosophy that drives her treatment in the show. And it makes me really sick trying to engage with Vrains after having this realization

[ask-princess-slaughter-shy]

Princess Slaughter Shy 2 (Page 1)

An original My Little Pony Creepypasta by Zaine McCartney

       Blood dripped off the glass sword and splashed on the ground leaving behind a crimson drop trail leading all the way down Luna’s hallway, down the stairs, and into the main hall. The first guard Fluttershy encountered on the main level was the guard she shoved her sword to. It nicked his neck but that’s all it did, thankfully. Fluttershy slowed her steps and kept her eyes closed as she walked past him. “Wash this until it shines then return it to my quarters.”

     “Yes, ma’am.” He replied sounding a bit nervous.

     This detected nervousness irritated Fluttershy and made her stop dead in her tracks. She turned around and stared directly at him with fury in her eyes. “I’d appreciate it if you guards would stop acting like pussies and grow a set! You will treat me with the same praise and confidence you did with the other four bastard princesses.”

     “Ss…” His voice cracked which made him clear his throat and adjust his posture and brought on a look of confidence. “Sorry.”

     She whirled back around and started back down the hall only to be stopped by yet another guard. “Your highness! Please, wait up!” He sounded more calm and collected than the previous guard which impressed her tremendously.

     “What?” She turned to face him as he came up on her.

     “It is crucial we discuss the laws of the land.” He told her as he struggled to catch his breath.

     “Laws of the land?” She echoed in question.

     “Yeah, you know, changing day to night and visa versa. Luna and Celestia were usually the ones who did that and without them the day cannot come nor end.” He exclaimed in a dark tone of voice.

     She began to walk ahead, “come with me.” He walked behind her. She lead him to the mouth of the castle that opened up to the outside, the warm orange colors washing over her body like gentle waves, the cool evening breeze rustling up her mane. She took in a deep breath and released it with a smile and looked to the orange sky. “Look at how beautiful this scenery is. Why would I want to ruin it with a bright blue sky or even a dark black sky full of blinding lights? Sunsets are perfect. They’re a mix of so many warm vibrant colors that paint the sky in ways only artists wish they could capture. Where not even the most professional photographers can capture their true beauty. What more to praise that beauty then let it stay present forever? Plus it’s the perfect temperature as well. It’s not too hot or too cold. There’s no sun to blind you yet it’s not too dark to where you can’t see.”            

     He nodded slowly as he tried to understand her view on the matter. “It is nice. But, your highness, we need the day and night to tell us when to wake or when to sleep. When to get off work or scho-“

     She shook her head. “We don’t need a day cycle to tell us that, that’s what clocks are for. They always tell us what time it is and whether it’s am or pm.” She explained with a soft tone almost unnatural for her new personality. “Think about it, do we REALLY need the days to change?”

     “When you put it like that it does seem a lot more peaceful to have things just like this.” He gave a genuine smile and took in all the beauty of the sunset for what it truly was. Magic.

     She beamed with pride and opened her wings up a bit to let the wind brush through their feathers. “So, is that all you needed to discuss?”

     “Ah, no.” He used his magic to pull a scroll from his saddlebag and read it. “There’s a scheduled execution at the prison in the Crystal Empire and they need a Royal to give them the command.” He paused as a couple crime-scene clean up crewmembers walked past carrying buckets of blood and internal organs. There was still heavy cleanup happening in Luna’s room where Sunset Shimmer had a… misfortunate accident. The guard had to fight back a strong urge gag as he read off the rest of the letter. “A-And since there’s currently only one Royal in Equestria that means it’s only up to you to be there. But they will understand if you decline the offer they’ll just keep the prisoner in lock up until you do decide to attend. They’d be honored to have you, though.”

     “Who exactly is it being executed?” She asked.

     “That would be a miss Pinkie Pie. Her crimes were that of poisoning the late Princess Mi Amore Cadneza to death with cupcakes laced with rat poison.”  

     A wide grin spread from ear to ear on her ash-yellow face and a delighted giggle began to bellow out of her. “I would be the one honored to attend. And if I may, could I be the one to deal out the execution personally?”

     “You are the law of Equestria. You can do whatever you wish, I’m sure they won’t mind.”

     “Excellent. Let’s go.”

     “Now?”

     “Yes now. Why? Is there a problem?”

     “Err, no?” He looked to the side and whistled for the chariot drivers. They came over immediately chariot in tow and helped Fluttershy onto it. Then they set off for the Crystal Empire’s prison that held the pony she once called her “friend”.

     Their physical appearances changed almost instantaneously when they entered the boarder into the Crystal Empire. Their once normal bodies shimmering like literal diamonds, crystals, and every other rare gem you could possibly imagine. Even without the Crystal Princess the citizens and landscape and infrastructure were still crystalized, but that was probably more of the legendary Crystal Heart’s doing. As long as it still spins the city doesn’t need its Princess. The prison wasn’t as fancy in design as the rest of the scenery. It looked nearly identical to the Ponyville prison except the walls were made of dull black crystal that was cold to the touch. The prison itself was fairly small only being able to hold about seven inmates. Luckily Pinkie Pie was the only criminal this city had to worry about being locked in here, all the other cells were completely empty. The bars on the cells were made out of normal iron just painted black. Fluttershy, who was accompanied by two Crystal Empire guards, came up to Pinkie’s cell. The only source of light the prison had were that of what the sun provided through the barred windows each cell had. The one parallel to Pinkie’s cell shone in on her only illumination a small fraction of her body. She was pressed up against the wall facing away from the bars and weeping silently to her self.

     “Pinkie Pie.” Fluttershy’s voice carried in a cold singsong tone.

     Upon hearing the all too familiar voice Pinkie looked back at her in shock and a hint of terror. “F-Fluttershy?” Her voice was horridly shaky.

     “That’s Princess Slaughter Shy to you now.” She sternly corrected.

     “Oh y-yes, my mistake… Please forgive me.” Pinkie apologized sounding even more terrified. She had quickly gotten up and rushed over to the bars where she made a pathetic attempt to bow in respect of the Princess before her. “Why…why are you here?” She asked upon getting back up.

     “A little birdie told me that today is your execution day. I wanted to see you before you died.” She gave a fake sympathetic smile that was turned into a fit of maniacle laughter. Enlightened tears brimmed her turquoise eyes that she proceeded to wipe away with her hoof. “Who am I kidding? No, I wanted to be the one who personally brought forth your execution.” Her face pushed right up against the bars while her mouth curved an evil smirk, “and you’re going to love what I have planned for you.” Her last sentence was like a slap in the face to Pinkie for it was a quote she used to use for ponies she threw parties for.

     More tears full of disbelief trickled down Pinkie’s still damp cheeks. “But… I didn’t DO anything!” She protested in a panic, her heart was beating right out of her chest you could even hear it.

     “You didn’t?” Fluttershy asked in a sarcastic tone. “But aren’t you the one who poisoned Princess Cadence? Weren’t you the one who sent her the box with those unfortunate pastires? Your name was on it how could it not of been you?”

     “I was framed!” She was becoming a bit furious and shot a surprise hateful glare at Fluttershy. “I was framed by you. Everypony knows it was you who killed them all, even a moron could’ve figured you also did in Cadence. How is any of this fair? How is it the innocent get executed when everyone knows they’re innocent yet they still choose to believe a psychopath like you?!” She began to heavy breathe after she finished her rant.

     Fluttershy just gave a light chuckle and pulled her face away from the bars. “Because I’m the self proclaimed Princess of Equestria now, and what I say goes. But I do want to commend you for being a lot smarter than you lead on to be, I’m very impressed. I admit one hundred percent I am responsible for every death brought on to the former Princesses, plus a few unfortunate citizens here and there, but get real. What can anypony really do about it now? Everyone knows that if they dare try to come at me they aren’t going to win, they will lose with the most grave of consequences.” She looked back at the two guards with a crazed smile, which made them cower down a little bit. “I’m the law now and I cannot be punished for any crimes I have or will commit.” She looked back to Pinkie, “and my law says YOU will be executed today via gilohtene.

     Pinkie placed her hooves to her throat, the color completely drained from her body, her once poofy dark pink mane deflating and becoming straight and flat. This is something that’s a common occurance when she becomes completely and totally downhearted.

     The two male guards exchanged concerned looks at one another. “She confessed to killing the Crystal Princess. Shouldn’t we involve Shining Armor in this? I’m sure he could do something about this-“ He cut his self off when he noticed the multicolored Alicorn giving him a sinister glare knowing immediatlely she’d heard him. He gulped and looked down timidly.

     “It’d be wise of you not to invite your precious Shining Armor to this party.” She warned with a hiss in her voice. “You’re luck I don’t fucking kill you right here and now for that tongue of treason you own. In fact, schedule a former meeting with me and your former Prince after the execution. I need to speak with him about this land.”

     The guard gave a modest nod. “Yes, ma’am.” Then sped off out of the prison.

     She glared hard at the other guard before speaking. “Hurry and prep her and the giohtene for the execution. I want to get this done and over with as soon as possible. Come find me in the town square where I’ll be inviting all the town’s folk to bare witness to the execution.”

     He gave a firm nod and went to get things ready. Fluttershy gave Pinkie one last malicious grin and batted her pink dyed eyelids at her. “Better gussy yourself up, you’ll want to look your best for Death.” She cackled and skipped on out of the prison humming the tune of Children of the Night. Pinkie’s legs wobbled and she lost her balance, falling to the ground in loud weeps.

     The multicolored Alicorn guided herself through the empty crystal city and stopped when she found the main television/radio broadcasting building. “Perfect.” She chimed to herself and walked inside. She was instantly greeted by a pink mare with ruby-red hair and a tail to match, her eyes were a shimmering two toned red and gold reminding her of Apple Bloom’s eyes. Her cutie mark was an elegant lilac flower made up entirely of stained glass.

     The mare bowed before her once she made it to her with a bright smile on her face. “Your highness, it is such an honor to have your presence in our office! How ever may I help you?”

     “Is there any way I could possibly override all broadcasting stations, both televised and radio? I want to get an emergency message out to everypony in this city.” Said Fluttershy.

     “Of course.” She lead her to a recording booth and motioned her over to the camera. She grabbed a headset with a microphone attached to it and adjusted it onto Fluttershy’s head. “There. Now, just wait until the little red light on the camera flicks on then start talking.” Her enthusiasm was very contagious it even made Fluttershy give an unscripted smile.

     Fluttershy nodded and watched for the red light, a fierce sense of pride in her stance. “Good ever lasting evening, my subjects.” She began once the light turned on. “Your beloved Princess has taken the time out of her busy schedule to visit your lovely city and be the one to personally draw out the execution of the bastard pony that brought the destruction of you beloved Princess Mi Amore Cadenza. And with a heavy heart I will be sure to bring justice to you all and the widowed Prince, Shining Armor. I cannot wait to see you all there in exactly half an hour. Keep in mind the invitation is not optional.” Her last sentence lingered like a horrid smell as the camera and microphone switched off.

     The pink earth pony trotted into the booth with the still same gitty smile she bore when they first met. “That was perfect, you’re a natural for the camera.”

     “Thanks.” She replied awkwardly. She looked around the room trying to figure out what else to say or do.

     “Is there anything else I can help you with?”

     She tilted her head to one side and looked into her eyes. “What is your name?”

     “Lilac Luster.”

     “That’s a very pretty name.”

     “Thanks.” She beamed when hearing the compliment.

     Fluttershy exited the room abruptly leaving Lilac feeling a bit confused and unsure of what to do next. She trailed a few steps behind the Princess just watching and waiting for another cue to help her. She stopped completely when Fluttershy exited the building without a single word. She stared at the door and waved an awkward goodbye to no one and quickly went back to managing different stations.

     Fluttershy walked silently through the vacant streets. She looked back and forth trying to peak into homes to see if anypony was even in them, but all the drapes were drawn closed making it next to impossible to see in. A sudden cold wind blew over her body making the fur on the back of her neck stand on edge. She stopped and looked around feeling panic overwhelm her heart. Her eyes zipped back and forth so fast it actually made it so she couldn’t see straight anymore. She shook her head to try and compose herself and when her vision finally came back into focus she let out a sudden shriek when her pink hair tapped her nose. Her cheeks lit up with embarrassment and she gave a little giggle. “Relax, Princess. Why are you getting so worked up? There’s nothing to worry about.”

     “Just keep telling yourself that.” Said the familiar voice of a mare from behind.

     Fluttershy whirled around with the look of complete horror on her face. She even let out a second more shrilled scream. Princess Entity was only two feet in front of her. “Wh-What are you doing here?” She was actually nervous about the Princess of Death’s presence. “No one has died.”

     “Not yet. I thought I’d come early for the execution. Though it’s a death that shouldn’t be happening.” She had a look of disgust towards her.

     Fluttershy’s face morphed into mockery at the Death Princess. “And what are you going to do about it? I’m the law of the land and what I say goes. And last I checked it’s against your nature to meddle in the affairs of the living.”

     “You’re right, I can’t. And I wasn’t planning on doing anything, anyway. The only thing I can do is give my input on the subject at hand but knowing you you aren’t going to listen to any of it, so I’m not going to bother wasting my breath.” She walked a ways past Fluttershy.

     “It must be frustrating, knowing you could do so much more if you weren’t cursed by Celestia and Luna. To know you could do so much to stop my tyranny if you were fully mortal. It’s ultimately their fault you have this “curse” being the Princess of Death. You’re nothing but a laughable excuse of a Royal. So were your adopted mothers.”

     Entity stopped, her horn lighting up with red electricity, her body was trembling and a low growl was emanating from her vocals. She let out a frustrated scream and hurled a large electrical orb at the other Princess.

     The orb startled Fluttershy and had her wrapping her wings around her body in an attempt to shield her from the blast that never came. The orb passed right through her and blinked out like a dying star. She unraveled her wings and blinked twice slowly understanding what just happened and then burst into a fit of laughter. “You couldn’t kill me no matter how bad you want to! It’s your curse, you cannot meddle in the affair of the living, in my affairs with death and destruction.”

     A few tears rolled down Entity’s cheeks as she recollected herself and walked away. “Forgive me… my mothers…” she muttered to herself.

     “Bunch of pathetic Princesses.” Fluttershy continued to giggle all the way down to town-square. She looked on in awe at the shimmering crystal gilotene. Her hooves carried her swiftly over to it and she circled around it multiple times getting a good look at every inch of it. The frame was carved from diamond encrusted black cobblestone with a rainbow-tinted blade poised at the top of the frame. The rope that held the blade in place was white with tiny rainbow gems woven in the strands. “I’ve never seen anything so beautiful.” She commented.

     “I’m glad you like it, Princess.” Said a dark yellow and white guard she met at the prison earlier.

     She turned to him. “Where’s the convict?”

     He pointed over to a prison chariot that rolled up to the square. He and the other guard she’d met earlier in the prison as well opened the door to the cage and led Pinkie Pie over and prepped her on the gilotene. She cried out in protest and tried to in desperation to break free of the restraining leather cuffs being placed around her hooves and hooking them up beneath the bascule.

[abgailgibbs]

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[rockandrollportlandor]

GOOD CHEER RECORDS HOLIDAY SHOWCASE

I've expressed before my affection for Good Cheer Records, a local label that emerged from the DIY all ages indie rock scene in Portland, but whose personnel have connections and influence in the mainstream of local and national indie music. Geek rockerMo Troper, also a writer for the Portland Mercury (cleverly disguised as Morgan Troper), even scored the coveted Pitchfork review, something which has eluded many of the best bands in town at the moment. Troper, the label's co-founder with Blake Hickman, has vanished to Los Angeles, replaced by Maya Stoner, a performer in several GC bands. Kyle Bates' project Drowse has seen praise from Vice's Noisey blog and SPIN Magazine, while another one of the label's star acts, Little Star, have gotten great reviews all over the place, including here on ROCK AND ROLL PORTLAND, OR. My favorite Good Cheer band, Mr. Bones, is sadly over, but the label, with so many other good acts, has hardly been damaged by these shifts--or a scandal that saw Jackson Walker, a member of Good Cheer band Naked Hour, excommunicated in the wake of his much younger ex-girlfriend's allegations of physical/emotional abuse. Good Cheer's bands are each unique, but broadly speaking they traffic in a hyper-sincere, heart-on-sleeve, guitar-based pop/rock that seems to trace its roots back to the 90's and early 00's, a time before MP3s--or at least a time when a single MP3 took a whole morning to download. It's the art-damaged cool and guitar abuse of bands like Pavement and Sonic Youth injected with the bloodletting melodicism of emo and the sweetness of twee-pop. It's a reminder of the truth in that old quote about Pavement being "the band that launched a thousand Weezers." These tendencies make the label's roster a refreshing departure, perhaps even a necessary counter-reaction, to the various fusions of psychedelic rock, dream pop, and blissed-out oddball party music so often seems to dominate Portlandian "pop". The earnestness of Good Cheer's bands, which the label proudly declares free of "mercenary ambition", makes a lot of what was represented by 2016's now-tainted "Mt. Portland" compilation seem positively decadent. On the other side of the coin, that comp's hip groups, often resented across the music scene for their perceived complacence and supposedly undeserved "fame", offer a sense of easy fun and trippy euphoria that the Good Cheer bands often lack--the label's name is pretty ironic, since good cheer is just about the last thing you'll get from most of these bands. Rather, they provide what Kurt Cobain ambivalently called "the comfort in being sad," the paradoxical sense of suffering as painful but life-affirming. At best that means a strangely joyous catharsis on the other side of the pain, at worst it might be written off as wallowing, navel gazing, and irksome preciousness. It's not for everybody, but it's way up my moody emo kid alley. These bands' music is about intimate feelings--even at its most bombastic, it's introverted almost as a rule, and perhaps that's how they create the feeling that they're Your Special Band, even when you're, as I was on this December Wednesday night, surrounded by a bunch of other people watching them. Good Cheer maintains the sense that their acts are the best band in your shitty hometown, who you see in some basement when you're 17, and finally, you've found a place where you fit in, finally, some people who speak for you. Perhaps the ideal place to see these bands is indeed someone's basement, but it was also fitting to see them in a major mid-sized venue like the Holocene--it was a sign that Good Cheer have emerged from a scrappy underground operation to become a major force in that vague genre known as "Portland pop". I didn't catch the entire show, which crammed six acts, successfully, into three hours, but the first group I caught was ALIEN BOY, one of the moodier bands on this moody label. Frontwoman Sonia Weber sings with the lovelorn yearning of Morrissey, but without the sass--unlike with the Moz, we never wonder if she's just milking it. The guitars hiss like TV static and twinkle like stars seen out a car window in the vanishing autumn, the rhythm section sprinting with teenage energy, paradoxically despondent and enthusiastic. At the Holocene, Weber's vocals seemed pretty off key a lot of the time, but it didn't really matter. The melody's largely in the guitars, and even the melody isn't that important. It's the mood the band creates with all of these elements that makes them such a powerful emotive unit. Even off-key, Weber's vocals are the definite not-so-secret weapon here, her contralto timber pitched perfectly in the dead center of the human vocal spectrum, neither male nor female, and therefore unusually universal in a social order still cleaved traumatically in two by a gender binary inherited from a religious order no one even believes in anymore. The group's latest EP, "Stay Alive", is a fantastic piece of gothic power pop, the fury of the instruments on tracks like "Burning II" contrasted to heart-rending effect with the vulnerability of Weber's vocals. These guys are one of my favorite acts Good Cheer has in its corner for 2017. Next up were a pair of musical twin bands, both involving Kyle Bates: DROWSE and FLOATING ROOM. Drowse is the more ambient of two, creating a storm of darkly psychedelic mood energy, as if Bates were some mad scientist attempting to isolate The Feels in their pure plasma form. Bates has been admirably candid about his struggle with clinical depression, even in his press releases, and some of his music is meant to be a literal translation of these horrifying experiences in musical form. As a person who's visited similar hells, I can definitely relate, and if you haven't, Drowse can give you a taste. It's the kind of music you bathe in almost more than listen to. I find it pretty hard to articulate with a vocabulary developed for pop songs--do yourself a favor and just listen. Undergirding the pure emotional whirlpool is a theoretical edge, at least according to Drowse's bio, which references Roland Barthes and Sarah Manguso alongside Mt. Erie and Unwound. I'm pretty sure those are uncommon influences for an indie music bio. Floating Room is the more conventional indie rock side of Bates' muse, but he still hangs in the background, and Maya Stoner writes lyrics and sings lead, while he continues his role as a sound-sculptor. Under this moniker he deals in his version of the Good Cheer house sound, described on the group's Bandcamp page as "the type of sadness felt at 4 in the morning, reserved for the heartbroken and the nervous." The guitar squalls of Drowse, almost more like weather patterns than music, wash over the structure of the songs like photo filters, providing a depth and texture that the more purely rock n roll acts on Good Cheer can't touch. Eschewing the crunchier "alt rock" guitar tones and punk rock enthusiasms of Alien Boy, Mr. Bones, or Cool American for a generously reverberated, fuzz-soaked, more plodding sound, Floating Room crosses definitively into shoegaze territory. It's gloriously eerie and ice-cold in temperature. It's the perfect soundtrack for walking through the woods in the snow, when all sounds are muffled by the falling flakes a the beautiful deathly calm seems to pervade the landscape--and it is a landscape, one you can seemingly gaze far into. On some tracks, the band is almost too delicate for this world, and the sounds seem made of glass, or icicles, ready to crash and fall the moment the temperature gets back above freezing. It's music for winter, for the low-hanging winter sun, gone as soon as it comes up, peering over the leafless treetops, secretly gathering power again once the solstice has passed. TURTLENECKED, the stage name of Harrison Smith, came up next, playing a very short set. Lanky and nervous, he paced the stage, singing R&B songs about being neurotic and narcissistic and romantic, all from electronic backing tracks played from his laptop. It was a very amusing break from all the intensity--even as he sang about heartbreak or unrequited love, Smith was funny, unlike anyone else who I saw perform that night. The stuff on his Bandcamp is mostly minimal indie pop, just electric guitar and drums, very dressed down and sparse, focused on Smith's deadpan vocals, both snarky and pathetic, but always charismatic. An older album, "Pure Plush Bone Cage", was fuzzier and noisier, but Smith's newer style, clean and clear, works better, matching the music's emotional exhibitionism. This presumably even newer R&B stuff is another pretty much genius leap forward. Turtlenecked captures the fine line between self-pity and self-aggrandizement, or rather signals its non-existence, refusing to apologize for anything--or else apologizing for everything--it doesn't really matter which--who ever believes an apology anyway? Good Cheer's brand can, as I said above, come off as overly precious, but Turtlenecked is an exception--one gets the wonderful sense that he barely even believes himself, but it's only the same sincerity of his labelmates doubling back on itself. Morrissey knows this trick well--it's basically his bread and butter. While most of the Good Cheer bands seem to work as band entities, Harrison Smith of one of the few who doesn't really need a band, or for whom any backing band would only be a backing band. He's just an entertaining and engaging enough figure in his own right--perhaps only Mo Troper, among his labelmates, rivals him for sheer personal charisma. Finally was the band I was most keen on seeing, COOL AMERICAN, named for a brand of Doritos. It's the project of singer-guitarist Nathan Tucker, a serious-looking dude who blew through the set with apparently great anxiety, often failing to sing directly into the microphone, seemingly wound tighter than a human can be wound. The band's tall bass player, Tim Howe, with his goofy grin and a santa hat borrowed from Maya Stoner, provided the necessary humorous counterpoint. Cool American's style is a pleasantly loose but melancholy power pop, filled with breezy riffs, mid-tempo grooves and smoothy shifting tempos and beats. But there's also a punk edge in it--at some point in every song, Tucker upshifts into a cathartic yelp, from which I felt sympathy pangs in my own vocal chords, before this explosion of his nervous energy receded, and he began to recharge again. Tucker's vocal range is limited, but the melody's in the guitars, spinning circles around each other, swirling and looping when they aren't exploding. Probably the most direct example of my Pavement-meets-emo description above, Cool American's unusual combination of mellowness and tension feels very much like West Coast life as I've come to know it, the cycle of putting up a veneer of "no worries" chillness and having it break down in the face of un-chill reality, only to put it up again, because fuck life, life should be better than it is. Better to try and fail to be chill and hopeful than live in cynical detachment. And for all their moodiness, the Good Cheer bands are never cynical. They don't just express heavy feelings, they believe in them, affirming their value and meaning in a society that usually runs scared from them. Unlike so much of the buzzy music in Portland, these bands never come off as careerist--you get the sense that any day one of them might break up because so-and-so had to move away for school or whatever. One could be cynical in response and argue that this sincerity is just another brand, but if so, I'll take it over the glassy-eyed smugness and empty glitz of so much of what passes for indie music these days. Long live Good Cheer.