#I just write so much sometimes I fear it effs up the pacing

[infamous-if]

DONT CUT IT IN HALF!!!!

I'll try not to lololol

[jess-rewatches-prodigalson]

Episode 14: Eye of the Needle

Here are my time-stamped thoughts. (NOTE: This was written before 1x19 aired)

SPOILERS AHEAD

0:45 - This whole scene is a little weird and a lot upsetting. Why are they talking in common room instead of inside Martin’s cell like usual? Martin looks disgustingly happy and Malcolm looks almost relaxed? The way that they casually discuss murder is upsetting. The ease with which they can both think of ways to kill each other at that moment is upsetting. I hate that Martin pretends he’s a Good Dad who could never hurt Malcolm even though he’s ecstatic at the idea of committing another murder. It breaks my heart that you can see how desperately Malcolm wants to believe Martin would never hurt him and how ashamed and scared Malcolm is when he can easily think of ways to kill Martin. It’s deeply upsetting to watch Martin realize that Malcolm is lying to him. He’s almost proud but also scared at the thought that his son can think of ways to kill him. Also - college!Malcolm is adorable in that shirt but that hair part is still not okay. 

2:30 - This is sweet. Finally. Jessica focusing on Ainsley. Look at how happy Ainsley is to be getting her Mom and brother’s undivided attention and pride. It’s precious. 

2:45 - I love that this implies that Gil and Jessica lost their sh*t on Malcolm after the wedding for skipping his vacation to work. They forced him to go on vacation anyways. I want to see that conversation. I want to see how they finally got Malcolm on a plane. hahaha this is freaking great. AND LOOK HOW MUCH HAPPIER AND CHILL MALCOLM IS RIGHT NOW. <3 That vacation did him good. Fight me. 

2:56 - hahaha Jessica is like “Why the eff did I send you to a tropical resort? You stayed in your room. Alone. Like a hermit. Ugh. I’ve raised a weirdo.” 

3:18 - This is a sweet Jessica/Malcolm moment. You can see how concerned she is about Malcolm and how honest Malcolm is trying to be with her. Even though talking about his father makes that haunted, sad look reenter his eyes. This conversation does have an interesting implication though - I guess no one (*cough* Gil *cough* Malcolm *cough*) told Jessica what happened during the internal affairs interview. You know, when Malcolm admitted that Watkins told him that Martin was going to murder him? 

4:10 - Look at that look Malcolm shoots Jessica when she calls him her “meddling son”. He is mildly amused but he’s also soooo calling her a hypocrite in his head right now. He also looks just a little bit excited that he’s being allowed to come and investigate the girl in the box. This boy missed working.

5:00 - I love this. I love watching Malcolm try to save his mother from some emotional trauma. I love how concerned and just a little scared Malcolm looks. This boy is an A+ son. 

5:38 - hahaha this is great. JT and Gil are so annoyed and concerned that Malcolm’s working again. It’s almost like the team was betting on how long Malcolm’s vacation would last and Dani just won the pot. 

5:44 - Look at the way Gil reaches over and puts his hand on Jessica’s elbow. It’s protective and loving and I’m in love. I’m shipping these two so hard. 

6:00 - hahaha The look that Dani gives Edrisa here. Dani does not have patience for Edrisa’s eccentricities right now. Dani is cold and concerned that a homicide seems to involve the Whitlys - she does not have patience for Edrisa whining about Dani “stealing her thunder.”

6:31- Look at how upset Malcolm becomes when the team starts talking about Martin. He immediately starts spiralling to a bad mental state. He sort of snaps at Dani, which is very uncharacteristic for him. The team sees it too - look at how concerned they are. 

6:45 - hahaha Jessica looks so alarmed at Edrisa’s behaviour toward Malcolm. Another reason to question what’s going on between Gil and Jessica - Gil looks at Jessica and says “You’ll get used to it.” He didn’t need to say that right now but for some reason he felt the need to reassure her and look at how worried Gil is when he looks at Jessica. This man clearly likes her. 

7:30 - Wait. How does ADN already know about the murder at the Carousel? Jessica and Malcolm wouldn’t have called it in. I doubt the police would’ve reported it. I didn’t see any media people at the crime scene. How did the media find out?

8:20 - Damn. Ainsley is in her element her. She’s loving this. I love how she tells them to call Gil. Makes me wonder once again what kind of a relationship they’ve had over the years. 

8:55 - What news station does Ainsley work for? In 1x7 Malcolm refers to New York Direct News. The screen behind Ainsley right now says Direct News Nation. Several times throughout the series, including later this episode, Ainsley’s news network is referred to as American Direct News. So....which is it?

9:34 - “Is this live?” Dang. Every single person in this room is scared and worried right now. I’m living for the whump. 

9:55 - This moment scares me. When Ainsley says “What.” and then stops herself she sounds exactly like Martin when he loses control. I don’t like the parallel.

10:05 - Awww look at Malcolm when he puts his hand on his Mom’s shoulders. He’s so concerned for her. It’s sweet.

10:25 - This scene is amazing. Look at how desperately Gil and Malcolm are trying to comfort Jessica. Look at how scared everyone in the room is. Look at how badly Gil wants to wrap all of his Whitlys in bubblewrap and keep them somewhere safe. He’s done with watching their emotional turmoil. 

10:42 - We got so close to an f-bomb here. Damn it FOX. Although, I will admit listening to Malcolm get indignant at his mother’s swearing is completely brilliant. 

11:00 - Is Martin allowed to do anything he wants...besides leave? Clay time? Consultations? Phone time? TV time? Is he allowed to play internet poker and drink booze too? Like dang. This dude lives better than me. 

11:15 - Again. It’s weird how much Mr. David and Martin seem kind of like friends. They have more than a strictly professional relationship. Makes me wonder how much Mr. David is getting paid - because he looks the other way when Martin does crazy shit very often. 

12:00 - Gil. Is. A. Good. Dad. He sees that the news report is upsetting Malcolm so he mutes it. 

12:41 - Yes. Can we address this? “The chickens are coming home to roost.” WTF? That is crazy person talk. I know what happens in this episode and that line still makes no sense. 

12:50 -  Again. Let’s all admire the progression of JT and Malcolm’s relationship. JT just said “no offence” to Malcolm when discussing his serial killer father’s murder victims. And he meant it. When they first met - JT would not have said that - hell he would’ve probably tried to partially blame Malcolm for the murders. I love this character development. Give JT more screen time. 

13:00 - Do you ever wonder how involved Gil was in the Surgeon case after that first night? He was a beat cop. There were other people investigating the murders. But yet - he interviewed Jessica that night. He knows all about the Surgeon’s victims. Is that because they promoted him to detective and then he took over the Surgeon investigation that night? Or because he learned everything from Malcolm and Jessica? I’m really curious. 

13:50 - This is awesome. I love watching Malcolm be a total big brother. The sibling dynamic is so authentic and I love it. This is a real adult sibling argument. This is exactly what it’s like. 

14:34 - Gil looks pissed. He does not like people messing with his family. JT looks protective. Damn. I love this. 

16:00 - Dang. This Ari guy is great. If only we could all deal with our trauma this maturely. “Leave the past in the past.” 

16:20 - Anxious Malcolm is really cute and Ainsley is not new to his behaviour. Look at her. She knows just what to say to stop him from working himself up with his anxious pacing and racing thoughts. 

16:40 - Malcolm is having none of this. This is an annoyed boy. 

17:05 - Gold star for Dani. This woman is a national treasure. Look at the way she rips into the TV producer. She’s pissed because not only does she think this is morally wrong - she can see how upset it’s making Malcolm. I mean look at him. He looks close to tears. He’s anxious, haunted, and sad. And his hair is falling into his face. You know he’s in a bad mental state when his hair starts falling on his face.

17:36 - OMG. Mr. David is so done with Martin’s drama. 

18:15 - Look at how proud Malcolm is on Ainsley when she calls out Martin for being a narcissist. This boy is mentally falling apart but he still finds it in him to be proud of his baby sister. My heart is so full. 

18:25 - Holy crap. Martin is a very good artist. ALSO the fact that his narcissism is so strong that he is making a bust of himself is just...wow. Yikes. 

19:10 - Sooooo did Martin orchestrate this whole thing? He totally knows what’s going on here. He cut off Ainsley before she had a chance to ask him. PLUS last episode he hinted that Malcolm would kill him. Is he really orchestrating all of this? Like he did in 1x7? Is that why Mr. David looks so done? Does Mr. David know about it? Did Mr. David help Martin? Is that why Mr. David turns a blind eye to so much of the crazy stuff that goes on inside Martin’s cell?!? IS MR. DAVID A BAD GUY?!? IS HE BEING COERCED? OR IS ENDICOTT orchestrating all of this WITH Martin? Or is Martin a pawn in Endicott’s game?!? OMG. This conspiracy spiralled real fast.....also I’m writing this on April 19th so episode 19 hasn’t come out yet. 

20:19 - Damn. Every member of the Whitly family (including Martin) hides their fear with humour. I love it because it’s amusing but also....not super healthy guys. 

20:55 - Again. I don’t like it when Ainsley gets angry. She resembles Martin way too much for comfort. It scares me. 

21:55 - You know, Malcolm and Jessica are really similar sometimes. Look at the way Jessica is desperate to help this case. She gets the same haunted, desperate look in her eyes as Malcolm does when he’s working a case. 

22:46 - I don’t like this. I don’t like this. I don’t like this. Jessica don’t do this. Listen to Malcolm and Gil. Go home. 

23:45 - Poor Jessica looks freaking terrified. She’s a good person. She’s not perfect but her reaction to this case really confirms that she had no idea about Martin. She wouldn’t have stood for it. 

24:45 - Gil to the rescue! <3 Seriously though, this is great. Gil is so concerned about Jessica. They both look scared when they see the body. This case is getting to the both of them. AND check out how they’re interacting. Gil’s arm around Jessica’s shoulders. Jessica putting her head on his shoulder. Ugh. It’s so cute. I ship them....but I will admit. I find it interesting that every time Jessica and Gil have an intimate moment the writers make a point to show us the wedding ring on Gil’s hand that same episode. In this one it happens at about 25:00. 

25:53 - Gil’s little speech here is really sweet. You can see how much he loves these two self-deprecating idiots. He’s rarely that sincere and soft. Look at Malcolm’s eyes though. On one hand he looks concerned about his Mom. On the other hand, he looks embarrassed and a little sad. Is it because he feels like he lets Gil down when he goes rogue on Gil? Or is it because Gil just called him a Whitly? Is Malcolm still technically a Whitly? I mean legally? Did he legally change his name? 

26:20 - So Gil still hasn’t fixed his Le Mans. I kind of love that. I’m sure Malcolm (and Jessica when she found out) tried to pay for the car because they felt guilty about Malcolm breaking it. Gil’s too proud to take their money. Plus - he would rather that Le Mans die than Malcolm. Taking the money would send the wrong message to Malcolm’s fragile sense of self-worth. 

27:00 - Determined Malcolm walking off is attractive. 

27:24 - ...so is Adolpho in on this too? Or did someone break into the car and put Jessica’s purse there?

27:50 - Update: Adolpho is not a part of this craziness. BUT I would like to know more about Adolpho. All of the Whitly employees actually. Why do they work for the family of a serial killer? How much are they getting paid? How long have they worked there? Did they watch Ainsley and Malcolm grow up? 

29:00 - Wishing someone were dead and wanting to murder them are very different. Jessica does not want to kill Martin. She just wants him to leave her babies alone. 

29:23 - sooo anyone else want to know how Martin found out that Malcolm was on vacation? Just me? Ok. 

29:50 - I love how much of a determined badass Malcolm is with Martin right now. Malcolm is pissed and scared and he is not taking any of Martin’s shit right now. 

30:40 - Holy hell. When Jessica walks in Malcolm turns as white as a sheet. Our boy is riding a very extreme emotional rollercoaster right now.

30:50 - Anyone else pissed that Martin calls Jessica “Jessie”? I feel like he’s doing it deliberately to piss her off. I know it’s different on a person by person basis - but my first name is Jessica and I hate it when people call me Jessie unless you are a) my mother or b) my brother. It’s the most intimate of nicknames for Jessica and only really special people in my life get to use it. I don’t give a rats ass if you call me Jess but don’t you dare call me Jessie unless you’re one of my top 5 people on the planet. Somehow I like to think that Jessica Whitly feels the same way as me about being called Jessie. 

31:00 - This whole scene inside the prison cell is a thing of beauty. Look at how scared Malcolm is when Jessica comes in. His voice is wavering, his eyes are wide, and he looks just a little confused. Jessica looks positively determined and fierce but it’s also clear that she’s hiding her fear. Martin is just enjoying the company - as usual - and acting like a giant jerk. 

31:33 - I love the way that Malcolm tells Martin to shut up. You can tell that Malcolm is scared. He’s in profiler mode and he’s worried about his mom. He doesn’t have the patience to deal with Martin’s wiseass remarks. It’s great. 

32:10 - The moment Malcolm realizes that his Mother came to Claremont to kill his father is haunting. He doesn’t look judgmental or angry. Just scared - for her, not Martin. Jessica looks scared too. AND MARTIN - he looks surprised? Is he faking it? Because I’m still standing on the “Martin knew this was going to happen because he was involved in planning it” hill. Check out the look that Martin gives Mr. David in the hallway. Is Mr. David in on this too? Is that why Mr. David is standing further away from the cell than usual? Is that why Mr. David is awkwardly looking at his feet instead of looking forward like usual? 

32:48 - aaannnnd now Martin is egging Jessica on. Yes. He’s definitely in on this. 

34:28 - Is that how Martin got to keep his medical license? He technically never killed a patient on purpose? 

35:00 - I’m loving this side of Malcolm that’s just giving his father all of the attitude. He’s so determined to protect Jessica that he doesn’t bother trying to play his father’s games. He’s just spitting truth bombs and staring at Martin in disgust. I love this. 

 35:05 - I love Jessica’s reaction to Malcolm’s accusation of Martin. I also love that you can see Mr. David look into the room as it happens. He knows something bad is happening in there. He can probably hear the conversation? Those walls can’t be sound proof and we’ve got some angry, loud voices. 

35:45 - This is Martin fulfilling his own prophesy. He doesn’t look sorry that he tried to kill Malcolm (or so he says? who even knows what’s happening anymore?!?) He looks like a dude signing off on his own death. Last episode he said Malcolm would kill him. He looks mildly alarmed when Jessica comes in with the stake. Maybe that part of this craziness hasn’t gone as planned. So, Martin says exactly what he knows will make Malcolm angry enough to take the stake and stab him as opposed to escorting his Mother out of the cell and leaving Martin unharmed. 

36:05 - Jessica’s quiet, angry exclamation about her opinion of Martin is wonderful. It really shows you her character. She’s loud, extreme, and angry relatively often but when she’s beyond furious? She goes quiet. That’s almost scarier. 

36:40 - That head snap. Martin has Malcolm conditioned to follow his command - I’m sure of it. What has Martin made Malcolm do? Why did Martin condition him like this? Look at Jessica’s eyes when Martin says “C’mon boy!” - she looks alarmed - she didn’t know Martin ever spoke to her son this way. Further proof that Jessica Whitly is a good person.

37:23 - Look at how quickly the tables have turned. 5 minutes ago Malcolm was talking Jessica out of murdering Martin. Now Jessica is doing the talking to Malcolm. Look at Malcolm’s eyes. They’re angry, resigned, and sad. They’re not scared. This is terrifying to me. Did Malcolm kill someone as a child because Martin told him to? Well. Malcolm’s mental health is in the toilet now. 

37:42 - Oh. NOW Mr. David comes. Of course. I’m telling you - Mr. David knows things. Bad things. He’s somehow doing Martin’s bidding. Or Endicott’s. This isn’t good. 

38:47 - Hell yes. JT for the win!

38:52 - Dani knows. She just gave Malcolm a look. She’s scared of him. She’s either scared because she knows what Malcolm did or because she knows that his current mental state is not stable. 

39:55 - This scene is heartbreaking. Malcolm is being completely honest and vulnerable about the state of his family’s happiness. He’s projecting his current guilt about Martin onto this guy and the dude is feeding on it. 

40:27 - I love that Malcolm restrains himself really well until the killer mentions his mother. Then he snaps. Look at Gil. Trying to gently get Malcolm to back off. You can see that Gil is crushed. He suspects that Malcolm stabbed Martin and it’s causing Malcolm to unravel. 

40:50 - Dang. JT and Gil are concerned about Malcolm. JT’s actually looking at Malcolm with fear in his eyes. He’s probably never seen Malcolm like this. Gil doesn’t look scared though. Only sad. When has he seen Malcolm like this?

41:00 - “Where does it stop?” - Tom Payne is incredible. The way that line is delivered is heartbreaking and haunting.

42:26 - Gil knows what happened. Or at least - he suspects. He knows Jessica and Malcolm well enough to know how things probably played out. He’s protecting them. Both of them. By pretending he doesn’t know. 

43:00 - Did Malcolm tell Gil the truth here? He looks like he’s going to. Huh. 

What a rollercoaster. Thanks for hanging out fam.