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technowoah · 3 years

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Cant Handle This

Quackity's facade keeps breaking, and he tries to keep the pieces together. You're the only one who can make him show his true self

- Quackity x gen neutral reader

- this is a long one yall.

Now playing...

Can't Handle This (Kanye Rant)

Bo Burnham

0:01 ─●──────── 3:29

⚠︎ swearing, angst, mentions of mcyttwt, based on the song above, and ofc its not proofread

Part of my Inside Special!

Quackity sat in his chair currently streaming right now, he seemed like he was having a good time from your spot on his bed. You were currently laying on his bed after he invited you here to relax.

You two had laid in his bed just enjoying eachothers company until he got a call from Tommy saying he was ready for the lore stream which sent Alex into a frenzy. Alex sent out a quick "Im sorry" about the lateness of his stream and then quickly set everything up.

He then started to stream which left you alone on the the bed to your own devices. You were scrolling through Twitter looking at Alex's fans talk about what's happening on the stream and posting screenshots of his character and himself.

You admired him from afar as he ended the lore part of his stream, he took time to type on his phone to text you that he decided to stream longer to talk to his fans. He looked to you and you have him a nod with a smile and he gave one back.

"Hey guys! That's the end of the lore!" He exclaimed to his chat as he types at his computer setting a new background.

You continued to listen to him praise his chat for supporting him and making him be able to make those types of streams. You were always proud of Alex no matter what he did, you were always his number one supporter no matter what happened in reality or on the internet.

"So anyways! I wanted to talk to you guys! How are you all?" He smiled at his camera looking back and forth from his chat.

◇T0mm71nn1t: THE STREAM WAS SO GOOD QUACKITY

"Oh thank you! Im glad I could share this with you. It takes so much to put into these movite type streams, so I know now it is all worth it."

Quackity's pov. . .

He felt so overwhelmed, he shouldn't have began to stream again. The stress of putting everything together, plus being late to the stream made him rush into it more. He just wanted to lay back down with his lover who was enjoying watching him stream, and that's the goal he wants. His goal was to entertain, it was his job and he doesn't want to fail, he doesn't want to crack.

◇Mayatooni3: WE LOVE YOU QUACKITY

◇catiiequak: QUACKITY ITS MY BIRTHDAY CAN I GET A HAPPY BIRTHDAY??

◇yriaaolic: 💜💜💜💜💜💜💜💜💜💜💜💜

"Happy Birthday!" He said seeing the comment pass in a second. "Happy Birthday to anyone who's Birthday it is today."

Right now it was hard. It was hard to keep up when there was always a constant demand, the constant need to be perfect, his past being brought up, and trying to one-up his content everytime. He loved this, but at the same time it had the same weight as a job.

In the back of his mind he knew the "When is Quackity streaming???" is mostly lighthearted, he never wants to leave.

"Quack are you okay? Im fine! Just thinking about how to get something to eat at 2am." He laughed lying to his fans, he wanted to stop this stream.

He kept looking over to his lover lying their head on his pillow scrolling through their phone and alternating their vision from him and their phone. He always caught a glimpse of their small smile everytime he looked. He was doing something right.

"Do yall think Taco Bell is open? The only problem I have is that Im fucking starving."

He paused for a moment taking a deep breath trying to keep his emotions down. The stress was getting to him, and he fucking knew it, but he didnt stop. He was going to get burnt out eventually and stop streaming and YouTube all together, but he needed this. He needed a break, he needed to take time for himself and stop putting on a happy face when he isnt.

TTS ◇pulixsaxe: "Did you see what was happening on Twitter quackity?"

"Wait what's happening on Twitter?" He asked with a weary laugh.

I can sit here and pretend like my biggest problems are

Pringle cans, and burritos

The truth is, my biggest problem's you,

Your eyes widened as he mentioned Twitter. Truth be told he was trending because of his stream, yes, but also they brung up stuff from his past again in the wake of another content creator's past or present being brought up. You hadn't paid attention to that, you were only getting fueled up from Twitter bringing up an issue that he already had addressed.

Tempted to speak and tell him its fine, he already spoke up before you.

"I bet it's fine! I dont wanna... I don't need to look." He said with a smile. He always had that smile on.

Either it was a full smile or a half smile. It never left his face and it comforted you somehow. Maybe it was that you were his significant other, but you always wondered if anyone saw the same things as you. The things like his smile that never left his face.

"Yeah! I dont need to look at that." He waved his hand dismissing the comment away. He then sighed letting his shoulders relax as you saw his smile fade and his eyes close for a second and immediately put that small smile back on his face while his eyes were glossy, but bright.

He needed to end this stream soon. You saw his face fall then in a split second come back to life except his eyes were glossy with tears. You wondered if anyone else noticed.

"I want to please you

But I want to stay true to myself

I want to give you the night out that you deserve"

His eyes tearful as he tried to blink them away trying to not make a scene.

"Sorry! Allergies ugh!" He said as he wiped his tears away claiming them as allergies.

"Are you crying? No! Im not a pussy!" He yelled at his chat in a joking manner.

He was crying and he felt weak. He felt emotionally weak, and weak as in not strong, he didn't feel strong and his lover who was sitting on his bed with a concerned look on their face always told him that it's okay to feel weak. The only meaningful thing is how you pick yourself up, they always told him, bur now he felt at rock bottom.

He wanted to give his fans "himself", the goofy, lovable, loud, quick-witted, Quackity. But then again his lover always told him to separate Quackity from Alex. He wanted to give himself to his audience, he wanted to be authentic and share himself, but he cant. Alex isn't all laughs, he is serious, calmer, and when he gets on the screen is when he lets it all out then goes back to his more calmer self. That's not what they want.

"But I want to say what I think

And not care what you think about it"

Giving himself meant dialing back, he wants to tell how hes actually feeling, he wants to say what he thinks about Twitter, what he thinks about certain friends, about his fanbase, and then leave it alone. He wanted to delete social media and then speak his mind without knowing what anyone is saying about it. It was paradise to him, but of course it cant be that way and that's what he hates. He feels like a actor when he really wants to be himself.

"A part of me loves you,"

Alex loved his fanbase, he had such a supportive fanbase that loved his content. Some of them did atleast he didn't fully know, but they gave him the courage to do this time and time again knowing that his content is at least taking them from the harsh reality of real life for a few minutes or hours. This was the reason he did this, for them.

Alex would never admit this but they boosted his ego too, it would for anyone. The fact that there were people who wanted and enjoyed content from him made him feel good about himself.

"part of me hates you"

He hated the contant criticisms, he hates that they feed his ego so much that it makes him want to stream more to feel good about himself and to make people get away for awhile. Alex knew inside of his heart he couldn't truly hate his fanbase, they gave him everything he ever wanted. He hates them for that and that's such a scary thing. He never fails to wonder if he did the things to deserve all the love and hate he gets.

"Part of me needs you,"

They feed his ego, they make him want to go above and beyond. Alex knows that his fanbase is the reason he is here in this chair infront of three expensive monitors. He knows that this is some sort of a job that he needed. He needed the push to keep going and that was them, it was the 200k people watching his stream watching him answer questions about him and

"part of me fears you"

He was fearful of loosing himself to them. Loosing his authenticity to them was something he feared. He didnt want his funny, loud persona to consume him and make him forget about Alex instead of Quackity. He fears what they think as well, he claims he doesnt care, but he does he wants to please them. It feels like two parts of his brain fighting about if he should care or not.

"And I don't think that I can handle this right now"

The text-to-speech bot continued to speak out people's comments that theu paid for while he sat there quietly. He bit his bottom lip trying to not break down infront of everyone he needed to be strong. He needed to be strong.

If he looked up at the camera everyone would see his tears, they would see him breaking.

He played it off as he brough his shirt up to wipe the tears away, claiming it as sweat.

"Im good! Im sorry I spaced out for a second." He shook his head.

He saw you look at him with that same concerned look on your face. As he switched his gaze between you and his computer, he felt his tears come back again.

"I don't think that I can handle this right-"

"Alex." You tried to get his attention.

"Yeah guys Im fine!"

"Alex"

"I don't think that I can handle this right-"

"I have plans later for another lore stream, so Ill start doing that later tonight."

"ALEX!" You yelled and his head turned around to face you.

"What?" He laughed, biting his lip again.

You couldn't stop him doing this, you could try to course him into going to bed, but right now you couldn't find the words. You just stared at him while he looked at you with a somber smile trying to tell you that he was okay.

He felt his mind telling himself that he need to rest. He wouldnt allow himself to and thats why he was breaking down.

"I don't think that I can handle this right-"

Alex was blinking rapidly trying to keep his breathing and tears at bay while he answered his fans.

"My allergies are fine! And I drank water today."

◇moonchild21: WE LOVE YOU

◇sopusand: Why do you look like that?

◇wuackityoo: are you crying??

"Crying is for the weak! I am a strong manly man! Im crying cause I noticed how alpha I am!" He tried to play it off as a "Im a man" joke but you could see right through it.

"I don't think that I can handle this right-"

You had sent a quick text to Alex which told him to end the stream for his own mental health, but he left the message unread. He began sniffing and the wiping his eyes again. It was a wreck and you couldn't seem to stop it without literally dragging him out of his chair.

Meanwhile the screens were getting to Alex. Alex's eyes were getting tired of the bright screens and the rapid messages that popped up on the screen overwhelmed him for what it seemed like the first time ever in his strraming career. He wanted to give them the fun night they deserved and wanted, but he knows it's getting hard to. He dosent know how long he can keep this up.

As Alex kept joking around about his eyes and physical state the chat was filled with "LMAO" and "HAHAHA" which fuled him more and then at the same time makes him want to stop.

Look at them, they're just staring at me, like

"Come and watch the skinny kid with a

Steadily declining mental health, and laugh as he attempts

To give you what he cannot give himself"

He cannot give himself the luxury of happiness. As he went on with his career it became more and more like a chore, there was mostly down days and of course there were up days, but recently Alex gave his fans the happiness and laughes they wanted while when he turned off the camera he couldn't replicate that same energy as he had before.

It messed him up, he felt himself become separated from his streaming. He wasn't being himself anymore he was being Quackity and that became more apparent as the days passed. He wanted to be himself on camera and at first thats what he thought he was doing. He was himself then it turned into a persona.

Alex wasn't okay and he he needed to take a break from the internet for a while, but he tries to act like he dosent have a dilemma going on inside of his head everytime he sits in this seat. Its for the fans.

"Think that I can handle this right-

I don't think that I can handle this right-

They don't even know the half of this right-

They don't even know the half of it"

"Alex you need to end the stream. Please?"

He looked towards you again where you moved your position from the middle of the bed to sitting up on the end of the bed.

"Ive told you millions of times." He paused for a moment looking down at his lap before looking back up to you. "Im-Im okay." He nodded trying to convince you.

"But I know I'm not a doctor, I'm a pussy, I put on a silly show

I should probably just shut up and do my job, so here I go"

"Cant you belive them!" He laughed to his camera. You scoffed at his comment but still kept an eye on him as he talked.

You didnt need to baby him at all, but right now you were worried about your lover.

Alex continued talking and talking, which you drowned out. You were focused on his face and how he faltered time to time just showing a small frown.

He laughed and showed them a good time even though he was hurting. He kept going and going and you were convinced he was going to hold out until you heard him sniff multiple times while trying to make a joke about the new Minecraft update and how the glow squid has no use.

"Stupid ass squid! Why- why? Its no use expect for glowing ink. Who voted for that!?"

You can tell them anything if you just make it funny, make it rhyme

And if they still don't understand you, then you run it one more time

"Dumbass squid!" He pulled up a picture if the squid as he yelled at it.

You began to worry even more as you saw tears running down his face. He quickly tried to wipe them away, but he knew everyone saw.

Handle this right

You don't even know the half of this right now

Right now (Haa!)

Now

Handle this right

I'll handle this right, I handle this right now

Alex leaned back in his seat and had a blank stare towards the monitor. Looked down for a second and then you heard sobbing coming from his spot. Alex had his head in his hands and was crying harshly into them.

He had finally broken, he couldn't stop the tears from coming and the loud sobs that came from his mouth. He was trying to desperately breathe in to be able to sob, but ended up hiccuping while doing so.

Your eyes widened as you rushed to him resting your hand on his knees and you kneeling infront of him.

"I cant do fu-fucking anything!" He yelled into his hands.

"Hey! I know. Its okay." You tried to console him.

"Its not I try so hard! And I-"

You cut him off. "You are a hard worker Alex and you deserve a week or two off. Take care of you self babe." You stood up bringing his hand with you and trying to make him stand up. He followed your movements and stood up with you putting his head on your shoulder crying into it.

"I just ca-cant right now!"

"You dont have to do anything right now babe."

"Im sorry!" Alex sobbed.

"Dont be." You said bluntly trying to get your lover to calm down.

You rubbed his back soothingly as he sniffled into your shoulder. "Im sorry for ruining your shirt." He tried to laugh through his tears.

"Dont be sorry! Please. You just need rest okay?" You kissed his forehead and he nodded in response.

Alex raised his head up an started to pepper kisses all over your face as you laughed. He gave you one last peck on the lips as he walked away to quickly change into night clothes. You smiled as he laid underneath the covers and continued to softly cry into his sheets. At least he was in bed and not makijg himself even worse.

He couldn't stop the tears from flowing, it was like a flood that could only be stopped with time. He felt like a boulder was lifted off his shoulders only to be replaced with smaller rocks. The smaller rocks was the guilt he held. He felt guilty of making his lover worry about him, he didnt want you to worry.

You rushed over to his desk and turned off the stream and his computers not even bothering to give them a goodnight or goodbye. After the computer lights were turned off it was quite dark in the room except for small light.

Finally you were where you wanted to be all day, in bed with Alex. But this wasnt the predicament you wanted.

"Forgive me. I just cant do shit right can I?" His eyes were still full of tears and he was getting tired.

"Alex dont listen to anyone but yourself." You tried to console him.

"That's what I'm telling myself."

Silence filled the room as you looked at him through tearful eyes of your own.

"Alex, you're so amazing and I cant even tell you how much I appreciate you, and how much you change my life. You do so much shit right its scary sometimes. Some days I think you're perfect, but there's-"

"There's no such thing as perfect." Alex finished your sentence.

"Exactly! Even the best people have their downfalls, they just dont show it. And Alex I know you struggle with that! All I can say is that I love you for you." You finished.

"Can I talk to you about my dilemmas?" He tried to laugh again.

"Tomorrow we can talk. We both need the rest." You said to him as he closed his eyes and nodded in response. He gave you a kiss on you lips before laying back down to sleep.

"Thank you."

"Thank you

Good night

I hope you're happy"

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pride-vns-blog · 6 years

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LGBTQ VN Week: Day Two! (6/19)

Welcome back for my second day of LGBTQ visual novel recommendations! If you didn’t check out my first post, I recommend at least skimming the "One note before we get started” section to get a handle on what this series of posts is. (And especially, as the case may be, what it isn’t.)

Today’s topic is “crafty creative design”, so I’ve pulled out Marccus’s Eldet, Geek Remix and ChicMonster’s Pairanormal, and Team Rumblebee’s Love Is Strange to talk about their development teams’ ambition (and ability to deliver), followed by a discussion with Boys Laugh+ about their 2017 NaNoRenO entry, //TODO: today!

Keep on reading to hear about treasure hunts with hot guys, mysterious twists and turns, power in reimagined narratives, and why taking time to look for brand-new visual novels you’ve never heard of before can be worth your while!

ELDET (MARCCUS)

Kickstarter Tagline: "A medieval fantasy themed visual novel with emphasis on LGBT characters and people of color.” Genre(s): Historical fantasy. Release Date: July 1st, 2017(?) (updated demo); TBA (full version). Content Warnings: Fantasy violence.

When it comes to aiming for new heights with visual novel storytelling and art, Marccus’s Eldet is one of the most standout examples of ambition — if it’s a possibility or a feature you could potentially implement, you’ll probably be able to find a mention of it somewhere in Marccus’s Eldet development updates on Kickstarter. They’re jam-packed with information about ways he’s exploring different ideas for interlocking narratives, replay value, or using the absolutely gorgeous art to its full potential. If the final version lives up to even a tenth of what Marccus has demonstrated working to include over the past two years, that ambition and drive to see things through as much as possible will almost definitely provide one hell of a visual novel.

Strictly looking at the demo alone, though, still provides a uniquely detailed experience where focus on trying out new things that suit the story is crystal-clear. The writing is sharp and captivating, with an interesting plot and gorgeous scenery that’s complimented by a smart use of animated effects. There have been more and more visual novels that have branched into the use of things like Live2D or animated sprites, but for me as a player, it’s been interesting to see how far use of effects like that can go before they just plain old start to be distracting. Idle animations or things like blinking and breathing can be charming, but the uncanny valley is very real and very easy to dive headlong into if you’re trying to include as many of those as possible.

So Eldet’s demo is noteworthy to me not just for trying out all of the visual effects it can manage, but even moreso for knowing by and large where to place those effects and varying sprites for the best possible impact. Characters are integrated into different backgrounds for special conversational scenes, or specific parts of event graphics glow, and none of it — to my eyes, at least — felt overused or poorly-executed. In fact, it all seemed especially suited to the fantasy genre Eldet is fitting itself into, with all of the pieces working together to create a world that feels alive and breathing. And it’s a world that seems well worth waiting for a final version of!

Eldet’s demo is available now on Kickstarter; you can also keep up with the final version’s progress on its development blog, or follow Marccus on Twitter and Patreon (18+).

PAIRANORMAL (GEEK REMIX, CHICMONSTER)

Itchio Tagline: "Love is a mystery and so are ghosts.” Genre(s): Mystery, romance. Release Date: April 1st, 2018 (Chapter 1); TBA (Chapters 2+). Content Warnings: Glitches and static (can be turned off); jumpscares.

There have been a couple "real person dating sim" visual novels in the past few years, but I've never really been all that interested in actually playing any of them; I can see the connection back to all those elaborate magazine quizzes about which celebrity you'd date, so I think they're interesting conceptually, but none of them have really pulled me in. I'm equally wary of the trend of Western visual novels from first-time developers that want to "subvert genre conventions" because of how many have fallen woefully flat of even understanding what that means beyond a very limited scope — I'm talking "oh, I don't really like or play any visual novels, the whole medium isn’t for me" visual novel developer commentary, here — so if an EVN promises a twist on a genre, or even if its players do, it's unfortunately a lot harder to sell me on it.

To my pleasant surprise, Pairanormal's demo sold me on both its "real person-inspired characters" aspects and its departure from the dating-based focus I'd been expecting into sharing space with another genre! I don't want to spoil anything about the plot, but upfront, the turn in the demo alone was a genuinely interesting look at a “blank protagonist” and well-served by being placed where it was. That’s to say nothing of the charming art style! Mechanically and visually, it's also one of the most interesting visual novels I've played; the character movement, the individual soundfonts, and the pacing of the dialogue all come together to work consistently well. (I love smartly-used soundfonts! Please give me all your VNs with good soundfonts!)

Even as someone who's watched a handful of YouTube playthroughs by two of the YouTubers being shown here, Mari and Stacey of Geek Remix, the writing in Pairanormal was sharp and fast-paced enough to actually make my brain draw a pretty easy divide between the real Mari and Stacey versus "Mari Sashimi" and "Stacey Croft". I'm sure there's plenty of rewarding jokes for their primary audience of a Geek Remix fanbase, too — but one of the strongest merits of Pairanormal for me as a player was the experience of having so little personal familiarity with most of the people these characters were based on and still finding the characters enjoyable, well-defined, and interesting.

Chapter 1 of Pairanormal is available now for free; you can also follow development of the coming chapters on Chicmonster’s Patreon, Twitter, and Itchio.

LOVE IS STRANGE (TEAM RUMBLEBEE)

Blog Tagline: "A fanwork based off of Life is Strange.” Genre(s): Slice of life, romance. Release Date: April 1st, 2016. Content Warnings: Drug use; underage drinking; mentions of severe bullying.

Do those characters and that title look familiar? If you’ve paid attention to the gaming scene at large in the past three years, you probably recognize the acronym "LiS” or Max Caulfield’s character design — Team Rumblebee’s 2016 debut project, Love is Strange, came to life as a Life is Strange (DONTNOD Entertainment) fanmade visual novel! In Love is Strange, set a year later after the original game in a completely different timeline, protagonist Max never gained her canonical magical powers and many of the tragedies that gripped Arcadia Bay never came to pass. Instead, she’s given a week to team up with one of her four love interests — Chloe, Kate, Rachel, or Victoria — and win a photography contest together.

There’s a lot to love about it beyond any connection you may or may not have to Life is Strange itself — everything, from the art to the music to the writing, pulls together seamlessly. But the biggest strength of Love is Strange as a fanwork, in my opinion, is the way it’s not trying to totally remove itself from the original canon tonally or trying too hard to conform to that tone without it seeming natural. Max’s character arc is reflective of some anxieties she’d had in the original story, which goes doubly for the explorations of her love interests’ arcs, but it’s fundamentally a different story where her priorities are different. Love is Strange loses what isn’t necessary or what doesn’t help the story — including the teacher-turned-[spoilers] from the original series, Mr. Jefferson — then fills in a lot of the blanks with the same charm and same compelling characters that captivated fans in the first place.

My favorite example here is Rachel Amber, one of the four routes but the lone one who never appeared in the text of the original Life is Strange itself, and a route that felt as wholly comprehensive as the rest. Love is Strange takes the perpetually absent, long-since-departed Rachel and recreates her from whole cloth, giving her a distinctive speech pattern, a history, and a set of beliefs that all work together as a perfect answer for the void around her character in the original text. She feels as real and authentic as the rest of the pitch-perfect cast, a character it’s difficult to imagine the original Life is Strange without. So in both enhancing the original text’s characterizations without ever losing its charm and standing alone as its own thoughtful, genuine F/F dating sim that is just as enjoyable without any fondness for the canon, Love is Strange easily cemented itself as one of my favorite visual novels — so strongly, in fact, that I’m still planning to cheer on Team Rumblebee’s individual and collective outputs for years to come.

Love is Strange is available now for free on the development blog. You can also follow Team Rumblebee on Twitter, Tumblr, and Itch.io to be the first to know if they decide to release anything next!

//TODO: TODAY (BOYS LAUGH PLUS)

Itchio Tagline: "A visual novel about figuring out life with the help of an AI.” Genre(s): Modern sci-fi. Release Date: March 31st, 2017 (Part 1); August 2018 (Part 2). Content Warnings: Depictions of severe depression.

Player personalization is one of the more tricky things for developers, largely in part because there’s no way to write something every player will be happy with; while some people prefer being able to insert themselves entirely into a protagonist with minimal predefined personality and more vague actions, so they can headcanon more easily, other audiences would rather explore specific situations with a smaller number responses that each more clearly reflect the defined protagonist’s personality. It’d be nearly impossible to please both of those groups at once — and there’s dozens of other, more specific takes that other players can have on visual novel protagonists!

As someone in the latter camp out of just those two examples, I thought //TODO: today’s handling of their protagonist Teal (plus their love interests Joyce and Phoenix) was right up my alley, so I reached out to Felix and Rohan of Boys Laugh+ to talk about their work on its story!

IVAN: Pleasure to be talking to you both today! Can you give me the elevator pitch of //TODO: today that you might give to an interested attendee at a con? You're both free to answer this if you'd like, haha.

FELIX: Sure, thanks for having us! //TODO: today is a slice of life visual novel about the aspiring artist Teal who already struggles to make ends meet but things get a little more complicated when an AI suddenly appears in their computer, with the intention to help Teal get their life back in order.

Perfectly put! (I like the phrasing of "aspiring artist Teal", haha, I feel like I'm reading their Twitter bio.) The gender/sexuality/pronoun options (and what I've seen of the dialogue variations) for the protagonist plus the romanceable characters are comprehensive, but never in a way that feels insincere or bland. I really feel like Teal's character — and that of both love interests — shines through strongly no matter what! What went into designing the personalization system as it currently exists, and why did you choose to include it in the first place?

ROHAN: Haha, yeah, Teal is the type who's a bit insecure about their art. So it's easier to say "aspiring artist" even though Teal has been drawing for a while. :'D Although our protagonist has their quirks and own background story we wanted the player to be able to identify with Teal. The player can choose to change Teal's name in the beginning of the game too. And the gender and sexuality options are based on this idea. :3

Back when we were developing the concept for //TODO: today in 2017, we had a close look at other recent VNs. And Date Nighto's Hustle Cat got us thinking about using "they" pronouns then. Hustle Cat's protagonist "Avery" has a gender-neutral design too. That got the ball rolling for us to think how we could make the typical romance situation in //TODO: today inclusive and enjoyable for queer people as well!^u^

FELIX: We also tried to keep the additional work for this fairly small. For the three main characters all pronouns and their variations are stored in variables. That makes it pretty easy to use the same base dialogue regardless of the characters' gender. But in addition to that, we used conditional statements to add some custom dialogue whenever it made sense. The romantic preferences are pretty much the same. They mainly decide the gender of the romanceable characters but there are a few moments where dialogue varies depending on the preferences the player chooses.

That also means that there are some things that people will miss if they don't make a specific selection of gender or romantic preferences but we wanted to make sure that those choices are also part of the characters and the writing and not purely cosmetic. All in all we tried to make the game as inclusive of LGBTQ identities as we could without making the scope unrealistically big for a two person team.

I think you definitely struck a good balance there! If I'm not mistaken, the two of you work in Ren'Py, right? What kind of Ren'Py limits or perks do you take into consideration when working to augment a story with more complex pieces of code other than dialogue variables, like deciding what your upcoming project Defaction's cellphone (?) can do? Anything you've unfortunately had to give up on? (And are there any lines of dialogue or features you're especially proud of including in //TODO: today?)

FELIX: Yeah, we're working in Ren'Py. I can't really think of any limits aside from smaller issues where different systems and languages intersect but there have definitely been a lot of perks! I really like Ren'Py's screen system which is where at least 80% of the work for the phone in Defaction happens.

The python integration is also really nice. In //TODO: today I barely used any python aside from if-statements and variables but being able use custom code pretty much anywhere in the script makes the engine really flexible!

As for feature decisions, so far we mainly based them on what we wanted to include from a narrative design standpoint and then tried to figure out how or if we would be able to implement them. I can't think of anything we had to cut for technical reasons so I think it worked out pretty well so far :'D

//TODO: today was the first bigger visual novel I worked on and aside from the gender and preference options for the characters, something I'm pretty proud of are the optional work and gaming scenes. They are pretty much the first piece of non-linear writing I ever did and it was a fun challenge to make sure they make sense regardless of what in-game day the player sees them on.

ROHAN: I think the most obvious feature we're proud of are the preference options we included, haha. We really wanted to take a few steps aside of the otome or exclusively hetero male-oriented genres out there. And to make the experience feel tailored to the player there are the dialogue features Felix has described before in combination with the visual designs of Joyce, the AI, and Phoenix, Teal's bookstore co-worker.

It's integrated into the story that Joyce has been made just for the Teal. Other AIs in the world would look different depending on their owners. That's why you get a feminine or masculine looking Joyce that match the player's preferences.

Of course there are limitations, I mean, we can't read the players mind to know what they like. And we couldn't include too many unique character sprites due to the scope. But I'm very happy about how the different designs turned out in the end. It was generally fun to visually design the game. Cute colours everywhere! >u<

On another note I think what really went well, too, was how AI Joyce behaves. We took some liberties with sci-fi magic, but Joyce is a being with their own set of characteristics, goals and values. They were made to serve, yet they're on eye-level with Teal and you get some funny situations out of it.

That's right, I'd completely forgotten that the work and art contest scenes weren't confined to the story's timeline on any specific dates — they definitely always felt like they matched up. And I'm so glad you brought up the designs, Rohan, that was actually my next question! The overall world design and character stylization of //TODO: today clearly had a considerable amount of care put into making sure they all meshed well and looked good individually! Can you talk a little bit about why you settled on the design aesthetic you did and what influenced //TODO: today's style or character designs? (Also, who are each of your favorite characters out of the cast, visually or personality-wise?)

ROHAN: Ah, well. First and foremost we were under a good amount of time-pressure during the NaNoRenO '17. Thus I had to decide for an artstyle that I could pull off for the game's assets to be produced in time. There's no complicated shading, not too much intriciate line-work. It was also the first time for me to create art for a visual novel. I was mostly a concept artist before. So I wanted to play it safe. That's one part of the story at least.

The other thing was that by the end of 2016 a lot of artists have emerged online who experimented with reduced palettes, pastel tones and comic and anime inspired shading. I was really intrigued by the charm of this combination. I wanted to make myself feel okay that although I'm a guy I can express myself in shades of pink, haha. This kind of aesthetic also matches the overall cute but realistic story of //TODO: today. I wanted the reality of the game to feel like our world but with some intense photo filters on top, haha. And my favourite character(s)? As the artist who designed them, I'd say visually all of them! xD But character wise, I think it's a close head-to-head of Joyce and SuuJ. <3

FELIX: I think my favorite character is Snow. I also really like Zen's design and his relaxed personality, but Snow was really fun to write! They're reserved and don't show much about their insecurities or problems, but Snow is still fairly confident and mature for their age.

I think a lot of that personality was also inspired by the art. Snow's design really brings across how introverted they are and because Snow doesn't have a lot of facial expressions, this definitely influenced the way I wrote some of their dialogue.

As a big fan of pastels/pinks, I can definitely empathize with that desire to express it more in art regardless of gender, haha! If you could each add any one feature to your projects that's currently beyond of your technical/artistic capabilities, a "wildest dreams" kind of thing, what would those two features be?

FELIX: I'm really intrigued by the idea of procedural narrative. Not in the sense that a story is random, but rather that it's systemic and somewhat non-linear. That's not really something you can just add to any project though and it probably also involves a lot of trial and error before it works but maybe one day :'D

ROHAN: Oh, nice question! I think it would be super cool to have hand-drawn animated cutscenes in a game. But that's completely beyond our budget of...everything...right now. TuT

Haha, I would love to play a procedural visual novel with animated cutscenes! (Although those two things combined would add even more work to each other, huh? #gamedev!) One final question — do you two have any LGBTQ visual novel recommendations from any other teams or creators?

FELIX: Ladykiller In a Bind left a pretty strong impression on me. In general, Christine Love's visual novels are usually really interesting mechanically in addition to their LGBTQ themes.

Most people probably already heard of Butterfly Soup but I really liked how heartfelt it is and the way the story is told!

And we already mentioned Hustle Cat, which is interesting in the way the main story and the romance routes are intertwined in addition to allowing you to romance all characters regardless of gender.

ROHAN: Hahaha, just imagine creating cutscenes for every generatable piece of story. That would be a killer xD And yes, I'd agree with what Felix wrote. The games by Christine Love, are really well written. Butterfly Soup is a fun ride and way too relatable for people growing up with Asian families. I also play The Arcana on my phone right now. I don't like the payment system too much but the story and characters are well-developed. And the artstyle is just gorgeous!

But one should also keep an eye on indie devs who aren't too well-known. Visual novels seem to generally be on the rise right now and we'll surely find some nice surprises if we keep looking! :3

Definitely agreed that people can find some really pleasant surprises by doing deep dives into places like Itchio's VN tag — or hopefully even from my list and these interviews, haha! Thank you both so much for talking to me, Rohan and Felix, it's been a pleasure.

The first half of //TODO: today is available now for free, or you can follow Boys Laugh + on their Twitter and Itchio accounts to find out more about their progress on the second half!

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weoutherelike-blog · 6 years

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The Naughty List

‘Tis the night before Christmas and all through the house, every flat surface of the living room is occupied by your lounging family members. Your beautiful family is painted with TV lights over a countenance of holiday bliss and you can’t stop admiring them. It’s quiet and peaceful and you’re surrounded by the people you love most in the world, together sharing this moment. You’re so proud.

Then you notice I’m on your television. You turn up the volume just a little bit, careful not to wake up you-know-who that’s always the first one asleep. I’m doing a press conference. You remember that I’m not likely to do press conferences, but I’m on every channel and I’m not answering your texts, so you start to believe the impossible.

I’ve invented a machine that enables you to experience your heart’s deepest desires. It manipulates the brain in precise patterns that it can run all your fantasy simulations subconsciously, and it’s done in such an authentic and believable way that you’ll have sharp and lasting memories about living out your dream scenario. Some Very Important People have already agreed it’s one-hundred percent effective, having each been given a demonstration. Everyone is now discussing what’s to be done with my machine.

You’ve been watching the conference for a while and it’s past bedtime but since I’ve made possibly the most groundbreaking discovery of all time, everyone gets to stay up a little longer. You learn that the machine has no way to record the adventure it sends someone on, so each fantasy stays private and locked within the vault of your own mind. You’re free to live out the life you’ve always wanted. Marry into royalty. Be the most famous person on the planet. Do the weird sexual stuff you don’t have the guts to actually try. Live out the plot of Blade Runner and be the one who Runs all the Blades (I’ve never seen the movie). It takes only seconds to use for a lifetime of incredible memories, and can be beamed remotely into your head so you won’t even have to leave your chair.

You also learn that I’m the only person who can operate the device, so the government, in a fit of holiday spirit, has kindly allowed me to keep my machine under the condition that they never have to wait in line to use it.

We’re reached the grand finale of my speech: I have a December 24th gift for everyone. Any person, anywhere, can earn earn a turn with my machine exactly one year from now. For the next three-hundred sixty-five days, each of you will accumulate points for day-to-day acts of kindness that are deemed worthy and the results will be displayed on the back of your left hand. It is up to you to discover which acts will earn you a go with my machine.

It would be dumb not to try.

My awkward announcement to all people of all nations ends with instructions to have a good night and sleep well, since the game begins as soon as you wake up in the morning. Your family excitedly doubts anyone will sleep tonight, then gets extra hugs and scrambles off to bed. Visions of sugarplums dance in your heads.

You wake to a shift in the atmosphere. Today everything feels a bit more special. Your family is smiling with sincerity in all the photos. You hear “please” and “thank you” and “you’re so welcome” as gifts are unwrapped in a calm and orderly fashion. True gratitude is being expressed at dinner, actual compliments are passed around, everyone notices the decorations you spent so much time on. Every so often, you see the number increase on the back of your hand. It’s happening to every one of you and the kids shout in delight each time their tally grows. It’s one of the most satisfying and fulfilling days you’ve ever had. No one bickered, no one felt excluded, nobody was put upon or overwhelmed. Each of you were the best versions of yourselves today. The points are a nice bonus.

The next day is even better. You hold the door for a stranger and your total rises. You pay for a co-worker’s coffee and get a little boost. All the while, every person you encounter is the friendliest you’ve ever seen them, and you begin to notice little changes in each person’s face when they score big. Internal celebrations seep into subtle smiles and the vibe of wellbeing intensifies. The rough edges you’re so used to seem softer. By dinnertime, everyone has heard of The List that’s being crowdsourced online of every scoring action and the average point gains being reported from around the world. Later in the week you watch a news report confirming that I’ve seen this list, and checked it thoroughly twice before authorizing it. You call me to see how I’m doing (3 points) and congratulate me on how my hair looked in that last interview (point), and ask for a few hints between friends for some higher-earning deeds.

Your Facebook friends are sharing their scores with palpable glee. Twitter is flooded with tips and tricks to maximize your daily average. Everyone’s Snapchat story includes video of them handing a water bottle to a homeless man or donating clothes to Goodwill. You can’t remember feeling more upbeat and motivated. You challenge yourself for weeks to beat your previous day’s score. Your boss gives you a promotion while eagerly staring at the back of his hand. The lady whose car you back into in front of the Chipotle gives you a hug to calm your nerves and offers you the extra guac they gave her inside. Celebrity scores become a hot topic and the most popular Reddit thread is a stream of fantasy synopses that you can sort by popularity for ideas.

These are the new best days of your life. A month later, the news is suddenly dominated by reports of people scamming the system. A young man in the South found out he could score points by signing up to volunteer, even if he didn’t show up to help. Two businessmen in South Africa racked up high scores for the hundreds of fake charities they created. A new rule was implemented: anyone caught cheating is now being publicly shamed for their punitive point losses in a document with a complicated military code for a name. Everyone just calls it The Naughty List.

A few weeks later, there’s a ripple of panic worldwide as people slowly notice their default point-earning actions are bringing in lower and lower numbers each day. You’re pretty annoyed at the grocery store when you’re only getting one point per cart you give up to someone else in the entrance. And when you bump into your ex’s new partner in line at the gas station, you nod at them politely three times but nothing even happens. Not one single point. It’s frustrating.

There’s a conspiracy theory going around that points are somehow tied into the significance of the action. It seems that robotically performing the same actions won’t cut it anymore. You aim higher, and the reward is worth the extra effort.

At least you’re not one of the disgraced people whose points fell when they were caught shoplifting or bullying or shaming a mother for breastfeeding. You’ve always been a good person. You check the total on your hand reassuringly throughout the day as you flip back and forth between the 24-hour televised coverage of the Naughty List’s newest inductees and the 24-hour countdown until next Christmas.

One day a woman in Bangladesh leaves her long-time abuser and that evening she’s an international news story for having gained the highest amount of points for a single achievement. It’s a game-changer once everyone realizes that taking care of yourself is a high-scoring act of kindness. Therapists become the highest paid, most sought after career. Suicide-line callers generate as many points as suicide-line volunteers. Checking into rehab nets people so many points that facilities set up overflow units. And you notice the change in your own life: finally making an appointment with your dentist got you points. Asking your friend to talk you through that panic attack got you points. You get more points than you can believe when you treat yourself to a massage for the first time in your life.

Yesterday, a senator abolished private prisons and jumped up to the top score in his country. Today, there’s a mad rush for all the political parties of the world to solve all of humanity’s problems. Global trends are analyzed. Low-scoring people are being shunned and anyone with a negative score is rounded up for questioning. You’re currently at a Walmart, loading up on 50 pound bags of dog food to bring to the animal shelter. You only manage to grab three because two other guys had the same idea and you had to argue over them. Now your good deed is making you late for work and you’re on edge, so when the cashier asks you how many dogs you have, you snap at her that it’s none of her business. You can feel everyone’s eyes on your back as your immediate area goes quiet. One whole point slides from your hand. You’re mortified. You’re apologizing profusely but the customers are already passing around a silent look of distaste at you. “You better watch out,” one of them says as tears well in your eyes. “And no use crying or pouting about it.”

You call me a few days later to confess to The Incident and describe your great remorse while asking if the Naughty List is a permanent thing. I could tell you were disappointed that I don’t have the power to give or take points, but it’s still nice to hear from you and I wish I could talk longer but participation in the game has far exceeded my initial forecast. So I’ve been working on a way to amplify my machine’s signal in order to beam everyone’s ultimate fantasies into their heads simultaneously to everyone in the world in just one night. I even opened a facility up north and hired some seasonal interns to help me.

It’s sweet of you to call, though. You glance at your hand hopefully.

It’s now been most of a year and you’re living in a utopian society. Everyone is on their best behavior. Everyone is practicing self-care. Life as we know it has drastically shifted. We’re curing diseases with all the money that everyone can afford to donate with the enormous cost-of-living wage increase everyone was given (corporations discovered they can score points of their own). You went back to school to learn that thing you’ve always wanted to try, resulting in an even hundred points, so you’re riding high. That single point on the Naughty List hasn’t haunted you for months. You give everyone on the street a friendly greeting because one out of 30 scores you a point or two and it’s just good math. And everyone smiles back, so it’s win-win.

December rolls around again and the perfect world is in a fever pitch. Rival Good Guy Gangs are fighting to show each other up with huge point pools. Your score is no longer a protected status for discrimination in the workplace, but you get two points for the email you wrote thanking your CEO for the opportunity after you’re replaced with someone almost double your score. The Top Ten are the most venerated human beings in modern history. The two Lists are dominating headlines and infographics came back into fashion. You’ve been perfecting your most wished-for fantasy in your head instead of looking for jobs.

Your family hasn’t spent much time together after the basic interactions were overused into low-score territory. The easy ones like reading to the kids, making lunch for the family, letting you-know-who sleep in so they won’t be so grumpy - none of them come with a reward anymore so everyone has moved on to grander undertakings. Keeping up with your point-league is starting to become a full time job, but not one that pays the bills. Your face hurts from smiling at every. goddamn. person you cross paths with and you’ll never admit how jealous it makes you that you that the idiot who almost got you expelled in high school managed to pull eight bodies from a burning building AND rescue a litter of puppies all in one week. It totally threw off your racket.

There are only a few days left until I load The Lists into my machine, tune into the brains of the Worthy, and make everyone’s dreams appear to come true. You’re broke and exhausted from shopping for 156 more people than usual, crossing your fingers that it’ll buy you a few more points in the home stretch. You stood in line at the post office for 90 minutes to send me a package of homemade cookies. You’ve been sitting in your car for a half an hour trying to talk yourself out of flaking on your volunteer shift at the Complimentary Compliment Call Center for the second time this month. It all seems so fake, anyway. Every action is in the pursuit of points. You’re just glad that the game is almost over.

Your entire family is relieved on Christmas Eve. You made it. Of course, the fantasy world you’re about to experience is exciting, but you haven’t felt this relaxed all year. The family decides you’re so close to the deadline now that a few more points won’t matter, and everyone should just focus on having a nice holiday without the pressure of the numbers on your hands. You love your family even more for the suggestion, and you all sit down for dinner with the most legitimate smiles you’ve smiled in too long. It feels good to just drop the veneer and be yourself. You laugh together and feel free together and eat way too much and enjoy all the things you missed most. Then you all retire to the living room in a content stupor and take up your usual positions in front of the Countdown timer on TV. This is it - what you’ve worked hard all year for. The timer ticks down the last remaining seconds. You survey your family one last time before it hits zero.

The people you love most in the world, together sharing this moment. You’re so proud.

Then you notice I’m on your television having some sort of press conference about a machine I invented and you’re surprised to see me on TV, especially since you know I’m not likely to do press conferences. You fumble for the volume on the remote to hear what’s going on. You turn it up, but just a bit, so that you don’t wake up you-know-who.

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leoninapelliolovesconchitawurst · 5 years

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ENGLISH TRANSLATION (by me)

MSN.COM Oct 2019

https://www.msn.com/de-at/unterhaltung/entertainmentmusic/conchita-wurst-im-interview-die-erleuchtung-ist-mein-ziel/ar-AAJkTsF?ocid=ob-tw-deat-1515664162172&fbclid=IwAR2vYaULC8-0LzvjXt5x7Cnko2l9tSwyttCKYAPUuw2MJ71nmaFRWSojFk4#image=AAJkTsD

(Conchita) Wurst in an interview: "Enlightenment is my goal"

Would you have recognized him? Tom Neuwirth aka Conchita Wurst aka Wurst is back. His third album is on the market. The 2014 winner of the ESC will also rely on unconditional honesty in the interview in 2019.

Stop glamor! With his third album "Truth Over Magnitude", Tom Neuwirth alias Conchita Wurst is re-imagines. No pompous orchestra ballads, extravagant ball gowns and big feelings anymore, but short hairstyle, rough beats and clear posture. The ESC winner of 2014 sets 2019 on unconditional honesty. Together with the producer Albin Janoska and the copywriter Eva Klampfer, the 30-year-old has freed himself from expectations and role models. At the meeting in Berlin Neuwirth wears an elegant jeans outfit completely in black and looks bright, relaxed and accessible. "Wurst", as his current shortened stage name is, is all about himself. A conversation about meditation, technoraves and plane crashes.

Q: It is said that on the way here you got stuck in the elevator. Is that your personal hell?

Thomas "Wurst" Neuwirth: No, I was not. I simply chatted myself in another interview. I think my personal hell is an army of people moving into a city.

Q: Your new album is called "Truth Over Magnitude", Truth over strength. When was the last time you lied?

Neuwirth: 20 minutes ago (laughs). Hey, I'm an actor! No, I can’t remember the last time I knowingly lied. Of course, I also know these everyday phrases so as not to escalate a situation. This probably happens with a regularity that nobody notices, not even me. But I think it's perfectly alright to lie out of social thought, to prevent hurting others, or because my opinion on a topic is not necessarily important. It does not help to break a fight. Sometimes it's easier to wave and say, "Yeah, okay." But I do not mean that with "Truth". By that I mean the truth that is above everything. The irreversible, so to speak.

Q: The album contains an acronym for its nickname - "T.O.M". How is the album a demask for you?

Neuwirth: I think that this topic is more content-related than that it has to do with a mask. I would separate it visually and content. I am a person who always wants to hear the truth. I also do not think that I'm unmasking myself with the album final. Personally, I know what each song is about, and I have every situation in mind. This is also because I do everything I do primarily for me. I am very happy about anyone who participates in my world and in any way finds beautiful what I am doing. But personally, I have come to accept myself with all the strengths and weaknesses and to love myself. I work on myself and do my best - that's the truth that I'm talking about. The people who are close to me may understand more about what's going on in my songs. For the rest, there is music that anyone can interpret himself as he pleases.

The "President's wife"

Q: You once said that the role of Conchita was too narrow for you. What is the difference between "Wurst" and "conchita" in the decision to make progress?

Neuwirth: After the ESC I thought that experts knew better what is right for me or Conchita. What to do, how to sound, what clothes to wear, and so on. The ESC was a megachance that I did not want to spoil with my half-knowledge. So I have addressed the opinions of others and spun a protocol in my head that today I call "the President's wife". The "President's wife" has made me unhappy. I did not remember where I belonged, and everything was more like working off for me, just working. It took me a while to realize that if my name is on the door then I should be in there as well.

Q: As an artist, however, one always puts himself in the service of his audience in a certain way.

Neuwirth: In the past, I always wanted to become famous, but I did not know how. Main thing is the public, no matter how. That's why I did projects from A to Z, be it reality TV, casting shows, everything. I would still do the same thing. I was asked today if I would say something to my younger self. My answer was: "Absolutely not". I have a great life, so we did everything right.

Q: You have been in New York a couple of times now, including to mark the anniversary of the Stonewall protests. What did you learn there?

Neuwirth: I always thought that I was too European for L.A. and that New York was my city. But, between us: New York is pretty cool, but L.A. is just awesome! This city is a single show and if I can do something then it's show! (Laughs)

Q: You also gave a speech at the World AIDS Conference, where you were announced as an "icon". How do you deal with such terms?

Neuwirth: I think that's a bit exaggerated. Sometimes I'm called a role model, which I do not like. To be a role model implies sacrifice in my eyes. I do not sacrifice myself for anyone. I do what I do because I can not help it. I say the things that I feel and believe I have to say. If I had grown up in another family with a different attitude, for example, I would probably live it authentically. I am glad that I am the way I am. But if I were an arch-conservative lawyer now, for example, I would probably live my life as an arch-conservative lawyer does and do not think much about it.

"I live in my own world"

Q: A song is called "Satori", a term from Buddhism. What role does spirituality play for you?

Neuwirth: Enlightenment is my goal. I once heard a story of someone sitting in a crashed plane and just saying to himself, "Yeah, okay, that's it. It was good as it was." I try to savor every moment of my life so that in case of my death I can say: "I'm fine with it, it was awesome!"

Q: How close are you to this condition already?

Neuwirth: To the enlightenment? Well, I do not want to die yet (laughs). No, I'm not that far yet that I would stay completely relaxed in a crashed plane. I would still go completely crazy.

Q: The album is much more electronically designed than your previous releases.

Neuwirth: The music is very close to my current private taste. For example, when I sang the great ballads and wore pompous clothes, I only heard things like Celine Dion. That just fit, that was the soundtrack of my life. Now it is a bit rougher.

Q: "Truth Over Magnitude" links the music culture of Vienna, where you are still living, in a certain way. On the one hand Vienna is the city of the opera ball, on the other hand there has always been a vital club culture there. Have you ever been to a rave?

Neuwirth: What does it mean, because "still living"? Vienna is the most beautiful city in the world! If you believe the "Economist", Vienna has just been declared the most liveable city in the world for the third time in a row! As far as the scene is concerned, I've never been to a rave before. But I have to do that, I'm sure I’d enjoy it. But I live in my own world. I do not need someone else for everything to make certain experiences. Honestly, for many things I do, at first I just have no idea how to do that. What are the codes, what are the rules? - I have never had rules.

Q: The single "Trash All The Glam" can be interpreted as a break. Where does this change of heart come from?

Neuwirth: At some point I asked myself why I did not make the music that I hear privately. Thankfully, I met Albin Janoska who, for example, also produced SON and understands this genre. And I was able to win Eva Klampfer, who also appears as Lylit, as a copywriter. Albin instantly got me into this electric world, that was great. Hand on heart: I can not write songs. My thoughts are too simple, my tunes are not mature enough. I also do not write a diary, for example. But what I always do is pick things up. Sounds, melodies, phrases - then I open Garageband and hold that tight. Out of this, a whole archive was created, which I gave to Albin, and he produced demos based on that. He chopped my voice into samples for example and, well, just made magic. Suddenly I recognized myself in this music. Then everything went very easily.

Extremely hot!

Q: Did you learn songwriting by doing this work?

Neuwirth: I do not think so. But I found my place when it comes to making music. It seems to be to document everything that drips out of my brain and heart. These are not lines of text or melodies, but moments and my personal story. I am in a position to be able to make music that is a part of me, even though I am technically only partially involved in the direct creation process. I am a kind of catalyst.

Q: Would you call yourself a musician?

Neuwirth: No, I'm not a musician. I'm a singer, actor, director, fashion designer, hairstylist, make-up artist, tailor and, if you like, interpreter. My problem with music is that you can not see it. But I'm a visual guy. Everything that I can see, I can judge and manipulate according to my ideas and let something arise. But that's not possible with music. That's why I love to make videos, for example. I listen to a song and have a movie in my head. In my music videos, I am also the boss who keeps everything in view.

Q: Your appearance is often interpreted as politically motivated. For example, in the video for "See Me Now", you're dancing in a red-lit window, suggesting a connotation to the red-light milieu. Was it here a concern to show that personalities are also taking place in this industry?

Neuwirth: Thanks for that, I'll use that in the future (laughs). Actually, I just wanted to show what my world looks like. The video shows what I like and how I find myself sexy. That was basically the starting point. I love being the center of attention, I love to be viewed, and I love to be talked about. That was basically the idea. I love my body too, I think I look extremely hot and I want everyone to see that. (Laughs)

The stomach - all of a sudden

Q: Do you prefer standing on stage or in the studio?

Neuwirth: On stage! I hate to be in the studio. You are so close to your own mistakes. Of course, I pull myself together and always sing the take as if it were the last one I ever recorded. But I can not stand it if I can not do something. Then I could disassemble the studio! This is the hardest part of my job. But I do not leave that to the producer. It just seethes in me.

Q: Maybe you should try meditation.

Neuwirth: In many situations I feel very emotional, that also notices my environment, but I'm not so quick-tempered. I have already tried meditating and do this at irregular intervals. But that does not always work.

Q: Speaking of mistakes: In the run-up to "T.O.M", many media have talked about your fitness. How hard did you like the change in sports and nutrition?

Neuwirth: Not at all. I am very vain and have spent months at airports after the ESC, where you quickly eat a bite to get on the next plane. Suddenly, I discovered something on my stomach that I did not know. My stylist then recommended a coach. When we started to exercise, I became aware of what it means to control your body through this really narcissistic reason. I found it fascinating how much control you have in the end. For example, in the past, I could not independently clamp different muscle groups. That's not terribly important, but I love to dance, and being able to move so flexibly is a win. I also see that as an investment in my future. I hope that I maintain this will to keep fit. I wish to be fit even in old age.

#conchitawurst #wurst #tomneuwirth #singer #artist #esc2014 #escwinner #music #performer #celebrity #lgbt #newalbum #truthovermagnitude #translation

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mirsan · 7 years

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:3c mirsan and kagsan? 💕💕

of COURSE jenny my sweet devil 💖💖💖

who is more likely to hurt the other?

mirsan: I think if we’re talking during the series, Miroku’s flirting and gags really start to wear Sango down and she can’t help but feel hurt. By the time they’re married though, I headcanon Sango has moments where she shuts down or her trauma takes hold of her and it causes her to act in ways that hurt Miroku, but they talk about it and realize where she’s coming from and work through it

kagsan: I can see Sango doing the same thing above with Kagome! It’s in Kagome’s nature and heart to want to help someone no matter what, and I think it might come off sometimes as overbearing and if Sango is in a certain mindset she may not be ready for that, but Kagome would eventually understand. BUT you know what I would have loved loved loved to see? When Kagome and Sango first use the hot springs together and Kagome hesitantly tells Sango she’s the reason why the jewel shattered, I wanted to see Sango react with something other than mild shock for half a second. It could have been really amazing to see them work through that together, especially considering what happens to Kohaku that same episode/chapter!!

more under the cut~

who is emotionally stronger?

mirsan: This is kind of tricky to think about?! I think Sango wears her emotions on her sleeve but there is a strength in being your authentic self and not hiding how you feel. But Miroku on the other hand is much more apt to keeping things below the surface and showing calmness and control, even if he is bubbling up underneath with anger or sadness or something else. I think he can prevent cracking under a difficult situation more easily, but I also believe that what Sango has lived through has made her immensely strong and I don’t think that’s undone by crying and showing those emotions sometimes!

kagsan: I think Kagome has a special gift of being able to carry on despite feeling intense emotions, and so while Sango might be overcome and feel like giving up, Kagome is driven to continue despite the odds, and that takes incredible emotional strength.

who is physically stronger?

mirsan: 💪 SANGO 💪

kagsan: 💪 SANGO 💪

who is more likely to break a bone?

mirsan: HAHA well….. they both have a complete and total disregard for their wellbeing when their loved ones are in danger but…. if I’m remembering correctly, every time Miroku was incapacitated in canon it was because of sucking up too many bees or miasma, or maybe he got cut here and there, and for Sango it was always from physical injury, including being hit by hiraikotsu or thrown from Kirara etc, so I’m gonna say Sango!!

kagsan: again, Sango!! I think Kagome’s physical injuries were limited to acid burns or cuts and whatnot, and either way Sango is reckless enough to end up badly hurt for Kagome’s sake imo

who knows best what to say to upset the other?

mirsan: LOL ummm Miroku might make the occasional ignorant/misinformed comment here and there, but I think Sango knows how to Read Him and incinerate his entire life

kagsan: AND YET remember in “Only You, Sango” when Kagome EVISCERATED Miroku with that speech about how much better Kuranosuke was than him? mmmmm Yeah she knows how 2 fucking use her Words to end a life

who is most likely to apologise first after an argument?

mirsan: Definitely Miroku!!! He is NOT one to drag something out, just picture him chasing Sango around in the catfish episode lmao. SANGOOOO SANGO HEYYY WAIT—

kagsan: Oh my god lol they’d both apologize at the same time and blush and then argue why its their fault and not the fault of the other person, I genuinely don’t think either one would ever spend more time than necessary brooding after a fight!!

who treats who’s wounds more often?

mirsan: Mmmm I’d say it’s pretty even (see previously: how fucking reckless they both are and therefore prone to injury)! Then again a lot of the time when Miroku is injured it’s a matter of waiting and watching as the poison passes through his system. But in a world where Sango grows up to be the leader of the rebuilt taijiya village, I think Miroku would spend plenty of time massaging out any knots and treating any injuries sustained from a day of heavy training ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

kagsan: Kagome treats Sango’s wounds with her handy dandy futuristic medical kit!! She frets and frets over how hurt Sango gets but Sango is usually waving it off with a blush 😊

who is in constant need of comfort?

mirsan: Sango. The trauma she has gone through doesn’t disappear just because Naraku is gone and Kohaku is back, and sometimes it becomes too much to bear and she needs to be loved and soothed and reminded that it’s okay and will continue to be okay.

kagsan: Same answer as above. The moment from the stolen tessaiga arc where Kagome holds her and strokes her hair is far from the only time she does this for Sango, I think.

who gets more jealous?

mirsan: SANGO

kagsan: o my god….. fuk…… I’m… gonna say Sango again but just BARELY lmao, if only because Sango doesn’t really hide it very well whereas I think Kagome kind of does?

who’s most likely to walk out on the other?

mirsan: WHY WOULD U MAKE ME THINK OF THIS!!! I’m not gonna answer this in the way I think this question is phrased (aka who would leave the relationship) but instead, based on how Miroku has left Sango for the sake of her safety re: inside Naraku when he fears the kazaana is just about at its limit and could swallow him and anyone around him at a moment’s notice, I’m gonna say Miroku. He would do what he had to do to keep her out of harm’s way, even if it meant leaving her side. I also think Sango is at her core someone who is loyal and stands by others and I don’t see her leaving anyone unless that person really, truly hurt her and betrayed her.

kagsan: okay even though I just said Sango is loyal and wouldn’t leave someone, I think if she thought she was a burden to Kagome or that she brought nothing but trouble for her (again with the stolen tessaiga arc), Sango might try to leave to spare her. But Kagome is Kagome and therefore if there’s one thing she would want, it’s to stay by her side no matter what.

who will propose?

mirsan: Mirokuuuuu huehuehuee

kagsan: KAGOME! I think she’s much more romantically inclined and outgoing compared to Sango, so she’d def pop the question first 💍

who has the most difficult parents?

mirsan: LOL uhhh well we know nothing about their one of their mothers, but Miroku’s dad went off and left Miroku with a drunk uncle for like his entire life and meanwhile Sango’s dad is the head of the village and trained his two children to be able to kill giant centipedes and spider demons, so I’m gonna go with Sango’s

kagsan: Man again, Sango’s dad is already intimidating enough but compared to how lax and cool Kagome’s mom is with her daughter just doing as she pleases and hopping down into a well to fight demons in the past, Sango’s dad is practically a drill seargant

who initiates hand-holding when they’re out in public?

mirsan: Miroku x9348502 he is all about physical intimacy and loves little romantic gestures that make Sango blush!!

kagsan: lmao Kagome is so bubbly and outgoing, again I think she’d initiate the physical intimacy over Sango out in public and her girl would just be beet red

who comes up for the other all the time?

mirsan: What does this even mean…. What…. Like who thinks of who more? Lmao I have no idea how to interpret this question so uh, I think Miroku can’t shut up about Sango and she always comes up in conversation, he also can’t shut up about his babies, he’s like Maes Hughs when it comes to gushing about his family tbh????

kagsan: KAGOME IS THE SAME WAY lmao she is always gushing about Sango. “Did you see Sango just throttle Inuyasha during sparring? o my god and the way she lifted him and threw him over the fence? I saw stars 😍😍😍“

who hogs the blankets?

mirsan: Sango is a total blanket hog and Miroku lays there with a pathetic “why me” face while he is forced to lay there freezing because is he going to wake up his wife and ask her to share? of course not.

kagsan: Sango IS Kagome’s blanket, u fool. u absolute fool!!!

who gets more sad?

mirsan: Sango, re: complex trauma and the tendency to let her emotions pour out.

kagsan: Same as above, but Kagome’s empathy makes it difficult for her not to come right down to where Sango’s at in the moment

who is better at cheering the other up?

mirsan: Miroku 100%. His main defense mechanism, I think, is humor; he can artfully use that to turn a situation around and earn a smile from Sango, but he is also great at instilling hope and reminding her that she can do what she feels she cannot

kagsan: Kagome’s positivity is so contagious, it’s hard for Sango to remain sad sometimes when Kagome is there, always cheering her on!

who’s the one that playfully slaps the other all the time after they make silly jokes?

mirsan: Sango!! Miroku is always being a silly lil idiot lmao

kagsan: hmmmm I think Kagome, mostly because I remember her popping out of the bushes in “Only You, Sango” and doing that to Miroku after she scared him half to death lmao

who is more streetwise?

mirsan: Miroku. I think he’s traveled around a loooot more and knows the ins and outs/the lay of the land, plus he knows how to get a free bed for the night 👀👀👀

kagsan: Sango, but I mean that’s kind of a given because Kagome isn’t even from that time period!! I love the idea of Sango teaching Kagome all about her era and the customs, since it’s likely that at her age Kagome has only just started learning about the feudal era

who is more wise?

mirsan: I think Miroku; I’m pretty sure it’s filler-y nonsense but when Sango explains the shikon jewel, one of the “four souls” is wisdom, and it shows Miroku when she says it BUT LIKE besides that, I see him as someone very in touch with old texts and scriptures and if this were a modern AU he’d definitely be in a few philosophy courses. He may not be the most virtuous monk but I still think he knows his shit!!

kagsan: I’d say Sango! Given how much she knew of the legend of Midoriko, I think she possesses some very useful, powerful wisdom (and knowledge re: demon slaying tactics and strategies). Where Kagome still appears very young mentally, Sango seems much older than just 16 and part of that is her mental age and I tie that to wisdom

who’s the shyest?

mirsan: 😳 SANGO 😳

kagsan: 😳 SANGO 😳

who boasts about the other more?

mirsan: Ok fuck I answered the earlier question wrong then. O well. Miroku never shuts the fuck up and can u blame him? He married a goddess and had three perfect children with her. I too would never shut up.

kagsan: And if you think Kagome isn’t the same way about this as Miroku is then o my god u poor thing u are so wrong, Kagome has literal heart eyes for Sango at all times and is Will Smith Introducing Jada.png in any given moment

who sits on who’s lap?

mirsan: boy….. Sango sits in his lap….. he’s a walking Blanket Fic, I can see why

kagsan: Kagome sits in Sango’s lap and is a giddy little ball of smiles the whole time!!!

#inuyasha #mirsan #kagsan #miroku #sango #kagome #ask meme #jenny saved my soul by sending me these two top tier ships #ask

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srta-jax-blog · 5 years

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NTPRS Day 3

Okay, so… I got very wrapped up in the goings on of the last three days of NTPRS and when I got back to my Airbnb (or in the case of Friday, the family home in Ohio) I was super exhausted and basically went straight to sleep.

BUT I didn’t forget about the importance of reflecting and my goal of using this blog more consistently, so now I present to you a summary of NTPRS 2019 day three and my takeaways!

Okay, so we started the day by discussing in pairs and trios a series of questions posted around the room, addressing the purposes, ways, and challenges of using TPRS in the classroom. After, we discussed some specific issues as a whole group. The big ideas that came up were:

-It will take years to become a master at these methods.

-We need to keep kids responsible and accountable.

-Involving the kids in the running of the class will help them stay engaged.

-Assessment comes in various stripes, and we have to utilize an array to really get a good idea of where our students are.

That first big idea is basically a mantra for life right? It will take years to become a master. I believe Von was also the one who said “Anything worth doing well is worth doing poorly at first.” I believe he was quoting someone else when he said it, but it’s a great corollary. This past spring when I put my toes into CI and TPRS especially (okay, so it was more like stomping around in the garden and getting covered in muck) I knew that I was probably not delivering the material in the best way possible. I was definitely not doing it particularly well, BUT I was trying, and I was working at it, and I knew I would get better. I’m not going to hold myself to the Linda Li standard or the Von Ray standard, or the whomever-you-choose standard for TPRS. If I did that, I would quickly become discouraged and would probably give up. What I can do is look to the masters as guideposts and start moving in that direction.

I am still holding myself to a higher standard going into this next school year because I have more understanding, more training, and more support. The standard I’m holding myself to is basically “Do better today than you did before. Keep moving forward and improving your craft.” I know people who have been doing this for two, three, five, ten, fifteen+ years, and I can go to them and say “I don’t know what I’m doing. Can you help?” (And I am reasonably certain they will.)

The next two big ideas basically come down to good ol’ classroom management. I’ll be honest, CM was my weak spot last year. CM is pretty much every new teacher’s weak spot, so I’m not too discouraged by it. That being said, we really spent some time discussing and demonstrating ways to keep the students engaged and behaving.

Von showed how he sets up a class on Day One. He uses L1 (the most common language of the group) to begin this norming process.

1) He asks “Who wants a good story?” (Obviously everyone, right?)

2) He demonstrates how he wants the students to react to various things he does. (Going “ohhhhhh” when he makes a statement and/or makes a rising hands gesture, answering questions with yes/no and thumbs up/down chorally, etc.)

3) He explains that he wants them to be active participants in creating the story. They can help co-create by giving English proper nouns or target language answers, and they should try to give interesting details. (If their detail is interesting enough, it will probably take precedence over what he previously decided.)*

4) He starts a story. He uses circling and begins taking actors and actresses for dramatization.

*Von did mention that if all the students are saying one thing… sometimes he’ll do the opposite just to keep the drama and interest up.

Classroom jobs help the students develop accountability and makes them manage each other. Having a timekeeper who resets a timer every time L1 is used instead of the TL is a great way to get the students to stay on each other about staying in the TL so I don’t have to. Periodic rewards for “points” earned in this way keeps the incentive up.

We talked about dramatization in more detail as well. This is something I was afraid of doing last semester, but I will be trying it in this coming school year. Students like to see their peers doing things, and it is a good way to assess how confident students are getting with speaking. The key to having the students speak is coaching and supporting their ability to speak. In our Chinese demo with Linda Li, she had about six student actors up by the end (Harry Potter, two suitors, a flower, and a speech bubble), and even in that story, the whole class was involved as a character early on.

We talked a little bit about reading texts, but I would have liked to spend more time discussing and exploring that as well. Basically, there were variations on reading and translating the story being read first as a whole group, then back and forth with the teacher, and then with a partner.

Some other useful info came when we discussed absences and late adds. This I found fairly useful, since it was a problem I dealt with consistently in my own classroom this past year. The main point that was made was to make the products of what we did accessible to the absent student, but not to necessarily stress about having them do things with it because of the repetition of the language. A useful support for late adds would be to allow them to point to words to form an answer, and then as the teacher putting them together to say out loud for the class. For homework we can have students do readings at home, retell the story in the TL for their parents with story strips, watch clips, and other things like that.

With regard to assessments, some ideas presented involved having a native speaker say something and the students identify the meaning or matching translations, doing readings with questions in L1, putting pictures in the order that go with the story, translating into English/L1, etc. When it came to assessing original writing, they recommended grading based on volume or on a rubric. The goal, according to Von and Linda was to write, on average, 100 words in 5 minutes. Later in one of the special topic sessions, Scott Benedict mentioned that the AP Exam is looking for 200 words in 20 minutes. (Therefore, if we set a goal of 100 words in 5, they could theoretically be writing 400 words in 20, which blows the AP expectations out of the water!)

A fairly hefty amount of time was spent pitching and demonstrating elements of the “Look I Can Talk” curriculum that TPRS Books offers. I would have loved for more time to be spent on how to identify appropriately leveled readings and how to make authentic texts more accessible to students, and reading strategies we can teach our students to help them read texts independently, beyond reading and translating.

I was pleased to find that the basic strategies I was using in my reading and writing assessments were good, and that I need to keep going with that. One of the things I would like to do as I go into this next year is have more visuals that go along with my stories and use those in assessments as well. I need to work on listening and speaking assessments. My big challenge there was finding the time and resources to do that. I think that will be much easier now that I have confirmation that my reading and writing assessments are in a good place.

Major takeaways:

1) Use the students as actors. Use them to manage each other.

2) Assessment should involve speaking, reading, writing, and listening.

#ntprs 2019 #comprehensible input #teaching proficiency through reading and storytelling #tprs #assessment #class jobs #norming the classroom #classroom management

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samjbatty · 6 years

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A discussion of the extent to which moral or political concerns are successfully dramatized in August Strindberg’s Miss Julie and Vaclav Havel’s Temptation, in the context of their time.

The purpose of theatre is often questioned; it originally began as a religious ceremony but has blossomed into a wide variety of performances with multiple aspects and audiences. I believe the purpose of theatre is to reflect the society in which they were written. To do this, plays must present themes, such as moral or political concerns, to the audience. Havel’s 1986 play Temptation and Strindberg’s 1888 play Miss Julie both explore a range of social and political themes, from sexism to the breakdown of the class system and from totalitarianism to the absurdism of bureaucracy, respectively. In this essay I aim to break down each of the play’s presentations of their themes and compare their efforts, whilst also using the social and theatrical contexts to illuminate the choice of themes made by the author.

Miss Julie is a one act play written by August Strindberg in 1888. The play was produced in what is commonly referred to as Strindberg’s ‘naturalistic’ period (Burstein, 1991). During this time Strindberg produced plays that strived for realism through vividly detailed stage directions within the text, as well as authentic sets and costumes. Miss Julie focuses on a wealthy aristocrat’s daughter and the family’s valet, after they sleep together and must choose to flee or face the consequences of their actions. Strindberg uses the characters’ brief relationship as a vessel to explore the sexism and dying class system of industrial Sweden. Chaudhuri, believes “the knotting together of separate systems of sex, class and space […] is not only the plot of Miss Julie, it is also the plot […] of naturalism.” (1993) Despite the changing power dynamics throughout the play, Miss Julie always remains the voice of classism and Jean, the voice of sexism. This is made evident through their arsenal of insults – Julie calls Jean “a servant”, “poor” and a “Thief”, whereas Jean calls Julie a “whore”, a “wench” and “crazy” (Strindberg, 2008).

The theme of sexism is perhaps the primary theme of Miss Julie, as it appears before the play has even started in Strindberg’s preface. Here, he characterizes Julie as “a man-hating half woman” (2008). This is a reference to the upbringing the author crafted for the character, wherein her mother “wanted to bring me [Julie] up as a child of nature, and what’s more to learn everything a boy had to learn so I might be an example of how a woman can be as good as a man.” (Strindberg, 2008). Despite this seeming progressive to a modern audience, with the last line in particular being generally accepted as a fact in society, Strindberg believed this was inherently wrong. The majority of contemporary Sweden would have agreed with him, as women were 33 years away from gaining the right to vote and not even close to being considered equals with men when the play was produced. The play then opens with a conversation between Jean and Christine about Julie’s behavior since she ended her engagement. Jean reveals that the relationship broke down when the fiancé snapped the riding crop Julie was using to whip him. The image is full of symbolism, representing “the curbing of female domination which was not allowed in the Victorian society.” (Sreekumar, 2012) This - paired with the later use of the goldfinch who is killed by Jean instead of being set free, as a symbol for Miss Julie – tells the audience that Julie is a woman who does not act within the confines of gender expectations and that this will have negative consequences for her.

However, in contrast to her dominating and often “masculine” personality, Strindberg has Julie revert to a more stereotypically feminine, submissive role when Jean seduces her. The character becomes dependent and naïve, going as far as to believe in the story Jean creates about falling in love with her when they were children. Strindberg paints Julie as oblivious to Jean’s manipulation. It appears that Strindberg is suggesting that despite Julie’s actions, she is just like any other woman and is naturally submissive towards men. The final action, which Julie takes, is one of ambiguity – she walks out into the garden with a razor, under orders from Jean to kill herself, yet the play ends before the audience is told whether or not she fulfills Jean’s instructions. It is generally accepted that Julie does in fact kill herself, due to the imagery of the rising sun illuminating Jean’s face through the kitchen window, which Franchuk believes represents that “Jean has reached the place in the sun after which he strives in his recurring dream; he has exercised the power of life and death over another human being, some- thing completely outside the scope of a mere lackey.” (1993) This also symbolises Julie’s final act of submission towards Jean, as “committing suicide highlights the extreme of gender inequality, On the contrary, Jean would never think of committing suicide.” (Sreekumar, 2012)

The second main theme of Miss Julie is the class system. As stated, this is explored on a surface level through Julie’s insults towards Jean, which allow the audience to view Jean how she sees him. However, Strindberg makes the issue of class much more complex by having both characters yearn to be in each other’s position i.e. Julie wants to be lower class and Jean wishes to be a Count. This longing is expressed through the characters’ dreams. Julie dreams of herself :

“sitting on the top of a high pillar and can't see any possibility of getting down […] I want to fall over, but I don't fall. And I don't get a moment's peace until I'm down below. […] and when I've got down to the ground I want to get right into the earth.” (Strindberg, 2008)

The dream is obviously symbolic of Julie wishing to be of a lower class and her conflicting feelings between wanting to remain an aristocrat’s daughter and be a commoner reflect Strindberg’s own conflicting feelings towards his mixed parentage. Jean has a similar dream, stating:

“I usually dream I'm lying under a high tree in a gloomy forest. I want to get up right to the top […] and plunder the birds' nests where the golden eggs lie, and I climb and climb, but […] it's such a long way to the first branch.” (Strindberg, 2008)

Jean’s ambition is to climb up the social ladder to be of a higher class, he plans to do this through being a hotel owner. However, upon close analysis, neither of these dreams are as innocent as they seem. Strindberg reveals a deeper motivation within each – Julie says once she reaches the ground she wants to bury beneath it, implying she will never be happy with her social position and the imagery suggests she may have suicidal tendencies, whereas Jean says when he reaches the top he will rob the nests of their golden eggs, implying he only wants to climb for material gain and his greed may be his downfall.

It appears that Strindberg primarily explores his chosen themes through not only dialogue but also through symbolism, which is unusual for a naturalist play. The use of strong imagery and analogy are usually reserved for more expressionistic works, namely surrealism and theatre of absurd. A good example of this type of play is Havel’s Temptation. Written in 1986, Havel’s ‘play in ten scenes’ focuses on Foustka, a scientist who is “secretly exploring the occult […] [and] the possibility that science itself is the worship of the devil” (Taylor, 2016). He takes on the help of a cripple named Fistula, whom he believes to be the devil only to realize he is a spy for his employee at the scientific institute where he is burned for his crimes. Havel uses the institute and its workings to explore the ideas of bureaucracy and totalitarianism.

The idea of bureaucracy and hierarchy is satirized in Temptation firstly through the staging. In the opening scene the audience is shown a room, which creates an “impression of bureaucratic anonymity” (Havel, 1989). The characters of lower power in the institute such as Maggie – a secretary – enter stage left, whereas characters higher up in the hierarchy like the Deputy Director and the Director enter from stage right. This creates a visual power structure for the audience that immediately places the main character of Foustka in the middle. The satire here comes when Kotrly, one of the scientists, points up and down in a reference to the powers of heaven and hell (Havel, 1989). With this action, Kotrly undercuts the importance of the hierarchy by subtly reminding the audience that all the characters - no matter the power they hold – are all on the same level and the true power is in religious judgment. Bureaucracy is further satirized in the repetition of dialogue. For instance, in scene one the Deputy Director’s speech:

“Good morning friends. Sit down. Sit down, please; you know that neither I nor the Director like to stand on ceremony. So, what’s the news? Did you all sleep well? Do you have any problems? I don’t see Vilma here. […] Looking forward to the party, are we? I hope you’re all coming.” (Havel, 1989)

is spoken again almost exactly by the Director when he later enters. This feature cpuld be openly mocking the emptiness of the words being spoken and the system of bureaucracy as a whole. Another interpretation is that “the play uses repetition as its primary technique for establishing progressive changes. The routines at the office gradually acquire meaning as their variations accrue.” (Quinn, 2016). In contrast I believe it is particularly enlightening that the Deputy leaves no time for the personal questions he poses to be answered. Havel does seem to be suggesting that asking about his workers is a formality for the Deputy and later the Director and that they have no genuine interest in their wellbeing. Temptation was written in 1986 Czechoslovakia, which at the time was under Communist rule. Havel was disenfranchised from the regime as he was concerned over the abuses of human rights done in the name of communism. I believe this highlights why Havel chooses to portray power figures as repeating and reciting hollow speeches and posing empty, unanswered questions.

Havel’s distrust of the communist regime also extends in Temptation to become a criticism of communism as totalitarianism. Foustka is burned alive at the end of the play because he tried to harness the power of the occult, which goes against the Institute’s belief in science. It is revealed that Foustka’s guide to black magic, Fistula, was a spy for the Director all along and that the entire institute knew about his secret practices. It is clear to see the reflections of a totalitarian society when the idea of black magic is viewed as an allegory for free-thinking.

In summary, the moral and political concerns found in Strindberg’s Miss Julie and Havel’s Temptation range from sexism to bureaucracy, and are explored in a variety of ways – Strindberg mainly uses symbolism whereas Havel uses repetition of dialogue and staging. The authors of the plays were able to explore these concepts in very different ways through different branches of theatre. Strindberg’s use of naturalism allowed him to create realistic characters with genuine flaws that the audience could see within themselves. The symbolism is only in effect to make these character traits more easily identifiable to the audience. Havel creates a surrealist play, which satirizes and exaggerates the hollowness of propaganda and social conventions enforced by an almost totalitarian communist regime that abused human rights and distinguished individual thought. Whilst both plays differ vastly, their shared aim is, ultimately the purpose of theatre – to reflect to the audience, the society in which they were written.

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References and Bibliography

Arntzen, K., Martin, J. and Sauter, W. (1993) Reflections on Miss Julie: The New Scandinavian Experimental Theatre’s Miss Julie in Copenhagen, 1992. Theatre Research International, 18(1), pg 3-10.

Bahr, E. (1994). Vaclav Havel’s Faust Drama Temptation (1985): Or, the Challenge of Influence. Goethe Yearbook, 7, pg194-204.

Beitchman, P. (2010). Currents in Comparative Romance Languages and Literatures: Theatre of Naturalism: Disappearing Act [e-book] New York: Peter Lang. Available at: Leeds Trinity University Library http://lib.leedstrinity.ac.uk [Accessed 2 January 2017].

Brustein, R. (1991). The Dreams of Ingmar Bergman. New Republic, [e-journal] 205(5). Available at: Leeds Trinity University Library http://lib.leedstrinity.ac.uk [Accessed 2 January 2017].

Chaudhuri, U. (1993). Private Parts: Sex, Class and Stage Space in Miss Julie. Theatre Journal, [e-journal] 45(3), pg 317-322. Available at: Leeds Trinity University Library http://lib.leedstrinity.ac.uk [Accessed 2 January 2017].

Franchuk, E. (1993). Symbolism in Miss Julie. Theatre Research International, [e-journal] 18(1), pg 11-15. Available at: Leeds Trinity University Library http://lib.leedstrinity.ac.uk [Accessed 2 January 2017].

Goetz-Stankiewicz, M. (1990). Variations of Temptation -: Vaclav Havel’s Politics of Language. Modern Drama, 33(1), pg 930-105.

Havel, V. (1989) Temptation: a play in ten scenes. Translated from Czech by Marie Winn. New York: Grove Press.

Quinn, M. (2016). Temptation by Vaclav Havel. Salem Press Encyclopedia of Literature, [e-journal] 1. Available at: Leeds Trinity University Library http://lib.leedstrinity.ac.uk [Accessed 2 January 2017].

Sreekumar, P. (2012). Social Norms and Feminine Sensibility A Study of August Strindberg’s Miss Julie. Language in India, [e-journal] 12(4), pg 384-393. Available at: Leeds Trinity University Library http://lib.leedstrinity.ac.uk [Accessed 2 January 2017].

Strindberg, A. Ed. Robinson, M. (2008) Miss Julie and other plays. Oxford: Oxford University Press. (originally published by Oxford University Press, 1998).

Taylor, T. (2016) Temptation: Analysis of Major Characters. Salem Press Encyclopedia of Literature, [e-journal] 1. Available at: Leeds Trinity University Library http://lib.leedstrinity.ac.uk [Accessed 2 January 2017].

#essay

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touristguidebuzz · 7 years

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Microsoft Bets on Artificial Intelligence to Help It Succeed Again in Travel

Microsoft's Cortana voice assistant lets users search the web for answers via voice. A new Harman Karman device is expected to bring Cortana into more homes soon. Microsoft

Skift Take: Microsoft thinks that voice-powered internet gives it a shot — via voice assistant Cortana — at upending today's travel search funnel, which is dominated by Google's search results. The theory's plausible, but Microsoft needs to move faster to win.

— Sean O'Neill

With the exception of helping create Expedia, Microsoft has struggled to figure out travel. But it is hoping that artificial intelligence (AI) will be its route finally to leapfrog ahead of Google and Oracle, playing a larger role as middleman.

The example illustrates the company’s current approach to the travel sector. The technology giant appears to be more interested in building “middleware services” that sit between customers and travel companies.

The company has a mixed past record of engaging with consumers on its own. For example, in 2008, it bought an airfare prediction website called Farecast for $115 million and integrated it with its flight search results on its Bing search engine. But that project, along with the MSN Travel mobile app, didn’t gain traction with consumers.

The company’s focus now is on the new AI and cognitive computing layers that it predicts are going to disrupt travel. By 2018 half of all consumers will interact with cognitive computing, thanks in part to the spread of AI-powered platforms like Amazon’s Alexa, Apple’s Siri, and — of course — Microsoft’s Cortana.

Microsoft says 145 million people use Cortana at least once a month. But that definition of “use” is fairly light, and the voice assistant is not yet ingrained in the habits of consumers enough to be a go-to when it comes to, say, travel search.

Stuart Greif, senior executive, Travel/Hospitality, QSR, and Transportation Industry Solutions at Microsoft, has been out on the industry circuit, sharing the company’s predictions about where travel technology is headed. Most recently Greif spoke last week at a conference in San Francisco run by venture capital firm Thayer Ventures, where Skift saw his presentation first-hand.

Greif says, “We’re not looking to build the next great travel platform. Our message to the travel industry is that we want to partner on delivering solutions.”

It has targeted several sectors of the industry, but its chances seem better in some than in others.

Voice-enabled internet changes the travel search game

Mobile apps may be replaced by voice-activated internet, Greif says. “We think the app world is going to go away. People can debate that, but why do you need to go in and out of a dozen different travel apps by touch if you run nearly everything on your device by voice command?”

Greif argues “bots are really the new apps…. Let’s say you often book hotels for business travel You don’t want to have to re-enter your information at every new hotel site or travel agency you use….”

“Our view is, I’m going to have a bot on a system like Skype or Cortana or Alexa or Siri, and Marriott is going to have its own bot, and Marriott is going basically ask me, would you like to check in? And my bot’s going say, ‘Hey is it okay to provide these details?’ My bot is going to say, ‘Yes Cortana, please give the information.”

Greif says the rise of voice-activated search may upend the direct booking wars between suppliers and third-parties.

“When you search for travel queries on a voice-powered platform, who owns that search?” asks Greif. “Is it Google? Is it Siri, Alexa? Is it Cortana? If artificial intelligence can look across the entire spectrum of everything that’s available and choose what to bring it back as relevant, whose is it bringing back? Is it bringing back brand.com? Is it bringing back the OTAs?

Greif conceded he didn’t have answers to the tantalizing questions he raised. And while the company’s Cortana is often seen as superior technologically to voice assistants from Google, Apple, and Amazon, there is a marketing and commercialization effort that needs to go along with the technological work to enable Microsoft to become a vital part of travel distribution.

As of today, Cortana doesn’t known many travel-specific commands.

What’s more, if it chooses to compete in the battle to funnel travelers to booking options, it needs to catch up to rivals by rapidly developing more third-party speakers that support Cortana. It’s prevalence via the Windows platform has not, so far, seemed like enough. Otherwise, Google, Apple, and Amazon may outpace it in having physical platforms distributed worldwide, making the questions Greif poses about who owns search moot.

A year ago Microsoft invited travel companies to build bots on its Skype messaging service, to enable the brands to automate many parts of their customer interactions. But brands like Kayak, Expedia, Hipmunk, and Cheap Flights, have ignored it, focusing instead on Facebook Messenger’s platform.

It’s not hard to wonder if a similar fate awaits Cortana unless Microsoft adjusts its ground game in travel.

What AI means for travel enterprise software

Microsoft translator can translate speech across nine languages in real time in sixty languages, via text input. But it is still some years off from real-time translation happens via speech.

Speech recognition could, in theory, someday replace airline gate agents and hotel front desk clerks, by capturing and processing requests, reducing error rates. As of today, the speech recognition is possible, but not the ability to send commands into travel company systems, Greif says.

Visual recognition could, in theory, replace airline agents who need to match faces with photo identification for, say, allowing a bag to be checked in for a flight. Already Microsoft says its computers are better at matching faces than humans are, on average.

Playing the long game

How long does Greif think it takes for AI to be able to actually have the business logic down that’s required for people to do things like search and book an itinerary that might be complicated?

“I think the search part is the easy part,” he says. “It’s all the back-end integrations and business decision-making that’s gonna take awhile.

As an example, an unnamed “large hotel chain” recently gave Microsoft links to five different frequently asked questions as part of a project to create a demonstration of how an automated, chat-based customer service interface might work.

It only took Microsoft’s developers and machines 10 minutes to read the content and come up with an interface that could provide those answers to a wide away of question phrasings.

But Greif says “bookings are more complicated.” He believes the industry will start putting these solutions into production within about five years’ time.

Despite Microsoft’s ambitions with Cortana, it has less experience in the quirks of travel marketing and distribution of its competitor Google.

It seems more likely to gain market share by providing truly business-to-business enterprise services to hotels for operations. Last year Microsoft began demonstrating its concept of the connected hotel that used next-generation guest experience management system iRiS and next-generation “hotel operating system” that acts as “middleware” for interpreting data in operations and finance.

Greif says the key issue for hotels is aligning all the systems in a guest room and the back office so that they are all participating in real-time. Right now the systems aren’t connected to know when water pressure is not working or the TV is not working and so the company can’t get ahead of customer complaints with predictive maintenance.

But the company’s active demonstrations with travel suppliers suggest that it poses a significant competitive threat to today’s largest hospitality tech providers, such as Oracle, and airline providers, such as Amadeus in partnership with Accenture.

Artificial intelligence is an authentic game-changer

Whether Microsoft is a victor or not in the AI race, Greif seems persuasive on his larger point that the arrival of high-powered computing in the cloud, more sophisticated computer algorithms, and the popularization of mobile, internet-connected devices is finally ushering in the AI era.

Platforms that can support AI are truly being popularized now, which means that hotels, airports, and airlines are increasingly powered by artificial intelligence. So there is some merit to the buzz.

The platforms are getting better at recognizing spoken queries and at helping to categorize various types of knowledge so as to deliver relevant and intelligent responses within particular areas of focus for a specific task or sets of tasks.

For example, in speech recognition, Microsoft had a historic achievement last year. It achieved parity in speech recognition accuracy with humans. That doesn’t mean its computers hear perfectly, but it hears just as well as humans do.

That said, the hype machine is on overdrive, Greif concedes. He notes that a few years ago every startup pitch described itself as a data analytics company, and “today every startup claims to be in AI.”

In the meantime, Microsoft is claiming it has a new company culture that will enable it to adapt to the new, fast-changing circumstances. Greif says, “It’s a whole new Microsoft. It’s a much more open company now. I get to keep my iPhone, and that’s always nice.”

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