#I they'd probably throw flour at each other

[starpros-sunshine]

sometimes I think about the Torikasa baking fic that I would try to write if I knew how to properly do that in english

[dreamofmysoul-tsc]

James and Matthew headcanons because TLH is over (;-;) and I adore them and miss them everyday

Matthew calls James "darling" because he knows it "annoys" James but mostly because he adores Jamie (I mentioned this in a previous list of headcanons but y'all will hear it again because I love it)

Harry Styles' cover of Juice by Lizzo is how I imagine Matthew's voice to sound

Matthew tries to convince James to be more adventurous with his fashion choices,,,it never works tho

James rarely cries; Matthew can probably count on one hand how many times he's seen his parabatai cry, but when he does, it breaks Matthew's heart into a million little pieces and he inevitably will start sobbing as well

If they lived in modern times and had cell phones, Matthew would absolutely send James a million pictures of things he sees and people he meets on his voyage. It wouldn't be cool landmarks tho, or like pretty scenery, no, it'd be like photos of a rat he saw stealing a donut, him almost falling into the canals in Venice because he stood up too fast on the boat, Oscar chasing a flock of swans, etc

James, Matthew, and Tom all gather at the Lightwood family tomb on Kit's birthday and the anniversary of his death. They bring lemon tarts to share, though they rarely ever eat one themselves, and talk to him about how much the world is changing, how Kit would've been so excited to learn that the mundanes invented airplanes and televisions and they'd even share with him the scientific contributions Grace has continued to share with Nephilim society (i refuse to believe she stopped being a woman in STEM after she figured out the fire messages)

Matthew is the only person allowed to cut James' hair

they both suck ass at cooking but sometimes James will attempt baking cookies or muffins for everyone; Matthew "helps," and by help I mean he sits on the counter and critiques James' technique until James inevitably throws flour at Matthew's very expensive and one of a kind waistcoat how dare you James

I will die on this hill because I've imagined James like this since his first introduction in The Bane Chronicles: his eyes glow, ok. Not like, very noticeably, but if it's very dark in the room his eyes will let off this iridescent glow kinda like the scales of a fish when they shift in and out of the light. People who don't know James very well or are seeing it for the first time can find it a little unnerving but Matthew never once felt afraid. He likes to call them his own personal north stars ✨✨

James and Matthew will share books back and forth. One will read and annotate it and then give it to the other who does the same. They love seeing each other's little notes as they read

Where Matthew is bright colors and expensive jewels, James tends to stick to the same four colors (black, white, navy, and gold) Occasionally Matthew will convince him to wear heavy gold rings inlaid with precious gems or a dashing emerald waistcoat embroidered in gold because "it will look absolutely lovely on you, Jamie" (and of course it does, in fact, look lovely on him)

They of course have that bestie telepathy that I think most people have with their best friend; when you witness something ridiculous and just give them The Look and they know exactly what you're thinking? Yeah, that's definitely resulted in plenty of instances of James and Matthew bursting into laughter for seemingly no reason while everyone looks on in confusion

Similar to James rarely crying, James doesn't strike me as someone who laughs often. That isn't to say he's unhappy, I just think he only laughs when he genuinely finds something funny. James doesn't do pity laughs, ok, if you say something ridiculous he'll just look at you like ._. Matthew made it his personal mission since they met at the Academy to make James laugh at least once a day. Like a full, unbidden, genuine laugh. Matthew could probably write a 10 page essay on how much he loves James' laugh, how to make him laugh, what never fails to make him laugh, etc

Matthew's love language is physical touch (we all saw him clutching onto James' wrist for dear life throughout this series right?); James' is acts of service.

Whenever Matthew has bad days, days where he struggles to be kind to himself, days when it's difficult for him to feel present, he tends to ask for James. James takes this as the blessing that it is, seeing as a younger Matthew would've bottled it up until it boiled over, and spends all day with him. Sometimes they sit in silence, Matthew simply needing to feel grounded with James' presence; other times, James will read to him, tidy his flat, fix that wobbly table leg Matthew keeps putting off (James is surprisingly handy) and on the really bad days James will hold him, rests his cheek against Matthew's head and reminds him of all the reasons he loves him, why he chose to become his parabatai, and that nothing Matthew could ever ask of James could ever be a burden

James gets Oscar a new collar with a matching doggy bowtie every year on his adoption day; Matthew obviously keeps every collar and switches them out so Oscar can feel like a dapper little gentleman

Anyways I adore these two and I'm still manifesting a Matthew short story collection because no amount of James and Matthew parabatai content will ever be enough

[script-a-world]

Submitted via Google Form: Follow Up on Gravity

So, this was my question I sent earlier: Tumblr Link / Wordpress Link I meant looks similar to earth as in, if you were there or in orbit (directly looking at the planet and not paying any attention to stars nearby etc), you would not notice that it is in fact, not earth. It has population that looks like earth people, the plants and animals look like they are earth species. Everything else people do, etc. You won't find curious or strange materials or plants and animals that don't exist on earth. The biggest problem with gravity is, how much difference can I make it and still have everything look like same except when an actual measurement of gravity or someone with keen senses, they'd notice a difference in gravity.

Tex: If it looks like a duck, walks like a duck, and quacks like a duck, there’s a good chance it’s a duck.

People who are used to sea level will often complain of different pressure if they visit a mountain, and people who go from a steppe to a temperate forest will notice a difference in humidity. You can likely get away with a few millibars difference in pressure and your off-planet characters will likely take note of the differences.

Wootzel: I’m struggling to find much in the way of actual data on what difference in gravity would be noticed, but my instinct is that it depends on the situation in which your characters encounter the difference. 

Consider this: When you’re in an elevator, you briefly experience a different g-force as you go up or down, but only as the elevator is accelerating. Once the elevator reaches its traveling speed, you no longer feel lighter or heavier. My attempt to search up what that g-force actually is didn’t go anywhere fast, but I did find this video (and transcript) of someone on youtube doing an experiment with a bag of flour and a kitchen scale to show the difference. It seems like in this particular elevator, the difference is only around 10% in each direction as the elevator speeds up and slows down. How that feels on one’s body isn’t exactly dramatic, but it’s noticeable! 

This is where the difference of situation is important. If your character teleported subtly from Real Earth to your Different Earth, say as they walked through a doorframe, they might suddenly feel heavier or lighter with 10% difference in gravity. Whether your character would figure this out or write it off as a weird sensation is up to you. 

On the other hand, if the character woke up on this Different Earth and had no immediate frame of reference, 10% gravity might not be something they notice immediately… but they’d feel something of the difference as they go about their day. 10% higher gravity would make them feel exhausted much more quickly and make their heart work harder. They’d probably feel as though they’re weak today. Getting up would be slightly harder, and so would lifting things. 10% is a big difference in how it would change the experience. If they were to wake up in Different Earth with 10% lower gravity, your character would probably feel light and energetic. A perceptive person might notice this feels weird, but since it wouldn’t create struggle, most people probably wouldn’t really think about it. I think the same experience could reasonably apply to someone coming in from space. Without the immediate comparison from what Real Earth feels like, a smallish change shouldn’t be easy to discern unless someone is really used to what hanging out in different gravity feels like. 

Please note that the 10% difference I’m throwing around as “noticeable but not dramatic” is a guess. It’s also a high guess, as I think you’d probably start seeing some of the experiences described above at less variation, and it’s possible that 10% WOULD start to feel like a dramatic difference much more quickly than I anticipate. 

[jamkookies]

° Bon Voyage °

• Part III •

Peek-A-Boo!

~

There are seven pairs of eyes watching you expectantly and you don't know where to look. This is definitely not what you had been thinking when Tae told you about having to pick a room.

"Well, what are you waiting for?" Namjoon says as a matter of fact.

"Why? Should I be somewhere else?"

"Y/N, how many times do we have to explain? " Jin interferes. "You are supposed to go outside and wait for us to hide in our rooms. Then you can come in and choose your own."

You deadpan.

"I'm honestly suffering from jet - lag and I'm so tired and I really wanna get this over with, " you say in a seemingly careless way, but the truth is you are internally panicking. The possibility of you sharing a room with Jungkook had you feeling on edge.

You didn't understand what the hell was wrong with you. This wasn't the first time you had to be close to him or to any other member. Living with them for five years sure had it's own effect.

Then what exactly had changed?

Why did you keep looking at him in another light? Why did you feel your stomach sink every time you threw a glance his way?

And look, you didn't even need to specify who him was, because there was no other to begin with. Just him.

You shake your head, trying to shake off the thoughts too.

This wasn't the time. You had to stick to your plan. Act unbothered, be unbothered.

"Look, hyung. She's scheming." Taehyung observed you like you were a wild animal.

You took this in your own advantage.

" I am so gonna get that single room. Just watch," you said with a false sense of self-confidence.

You stomp off the room and get out into the hallway.

You wait until one of the staff members opens the door again and lets you in.

You carefully step inside, making your feet light on the floor so as not to give away your location.

You pace in the living room and then you think of something. You stomp your feet hard on the floor and wait for any other sound coming from upstairs.

Nothing.

Then your ears catch a romping on the corner of the ceiling.

So, that room was already overcrowded then.

You take the stairs and head for the opposite way.

There was no guarantee that it would be empty, considering that there were a lot of members, but at this point you didn't care anymore. You tentatively pull down the handle and peek inside .

Only a glimpse of white sheets greets you. You swing the door completely open and almost cry out of joy.

It's empty.

You had gotten the single room.

You raise your arms in victory and jump right into the single bed , savoring the comfortable feeling of the smooth sheets.

"Ahhh, finally - "

"Peek-a-boo!"

" AAAAAAAGHH!"

You scream at the top of your lungs and fall to the floor with a thump, when you see Jungkook's head peeking from under the bed.

The impact rattles your teeth and you groan in pain.

"What are you doing over there?"

Jungkook pulls off a cocky smile.

"Pranking you, of course. Did you really think you were gonna get a whole room to yourself?"

"I was hoping to."

"Nope, you're stuck with me."

"Come here , you little rascal! " You say through clenched teeth and make an attempt at catching him.

He easily avoids you and swerves to the side. You then start to chase him around the room like a five year-old, but was the boy fast...

When you somehow catch hold of him, you put him in a headlock and are about to smack him upside the head, when the rest of the boys come storming into the room.

"What are you doing?" Asks Yoongi. "We heard screaming."

"What does it look like I'm doing? Beating this kid's ass for almost giving me a heart attack, of course."

"Hey, watch the formalities. I'm older than you," Jungkook protests, head still under your arm.

Jin looks at the nearest camera." Could you please cut this part? We don't want the show to be age - restricted because of her cussing."

You stick your tongue at him and then proceed to make a face at the camera.

Jungkook takes his chance and tickles you on your side.

You release him almost immediately, writhing uncontrollably. You were really ticklish, and at the slightest threat you were always ready to throw hands.

Zero tolerance on that.

Still, you manage to kick him behind the knees, making his legs give out.

"How's the ground, loser?"

He looks at you through his see - through bangs and gives you a mischievous smile.

You notice Hoseok pinching the bridge of his nose and then start laughing yourself.

* * *

You are sitting on the couch along with the boys, waiting for instructions from the staff. Even though this was a time for you to enjoy your holidays and get your mind off of the stress, concerts, and everything else, games and missions weren't something you could get rid of.

" You are all going to try to make dinner for tonight. Each one of you is assigned a special dish, and you are to cook it with the ingredients given to you. The one with the best dish wins 200 dollars to spend on shopping."

Everyone lets out cheers of joy at the mention of money.

You were all rich as hell, but you still got excited even at the mention of so much as a coupon. It was your own way of appreciating little things.

The staff member offers you a basket full of tiny globes, each containing a rolled up paper.

He puts the basket in the middle of the circle were you are all sitting on the floor and gestures for you to proceed.

Taehyung fishes one out and opens it carefully, retrieving the roll of paper inside. He's kinda nervous because he doesn't have much experience with cooking, but you all give him reassuring smiles, nudging him to go on.

The paper reads ' Pasta '.

"You're saved, Taehyungie. That's an easy thing to make," Jimin says.

He sighs, relieved and smiles widely.

Next is Jin, who goes for the globe without hesitation.

Kimbap.

Jimin. Salad.

Jungkook. Steak.

Namjoon. Soup. You snorted when hearing that.

Hoseok. Milk-shakes.

Yoongi. Tteok-bokki.

It was your turn now.You open the paper with shaky hands and read it.

Pancakes.

Yes !

That was one of the only things you knew how to make.

Namjoon looked at you with puppy eyes.

"Would you want to switch?"

You act like you're touched by his display of cuteness then pull off the most serious face.

"No."

You jump around in excitement, showing your piece of paper to the other members with the most exagerated moves.

Jin joins you and you start making silly dance moves together.

* * *

Everyone is busy trying to make their own dish and you're no less invested.

There's a hell of a mess in front of you - flour, milk and eggs. Your hair is smeared white even though you had tied it in a bun on the back of your head.

It was fairly short and there were multiple strands escaping from it, but it didn't bother you that much.

At least the apron was doing a good job of shielding your clothes.

You take a look at the others who are concentrated on their tasks. The only sounds in the room are those of knives, spoons and the occasional sizzling of oil.

Then, out of nowhere Jin's voice is heard.

"Hey guys, can you turn off the AC? I'm a little chilli," he says, while holding an actual chili pepper and then laughs like a windshield wiper.

Everyone is trying to hold their laughter, except for Yoongi who actually looks displeased.

"Please stop. It's making me angry."

Jin ignores him and grabs two eggs from the counter.

"You know why eggs don't tell jokes?" He continues. " Because they'd crack each other up!"

You can't hold it in anymore. You double over with laughter, holding your aching stomach. Everyone else is having the time of their lives because of Jin's antics.

Still giggling, you move around the kitchen trying to find other ingredients and bump into Jungkook along the way.

He kicks you lightly in the shin. You kick him back. You both have your hands occupied - him holding a bowl filled with water and you a pack of flour, so you start a kicking competition.

"Hey, quit it you two!" Yoongi yells over the noise of frying food.

Just to spite him, you pour flour all over Jungkook's head. He is outraged and gets back at you splashing you in the face with the water.

You gasp, the coldness seeping into your clothes and making you shiver.

You are soaking wet and you're making a mess out of the water dripping from your face onto the floor.

He's gonna pay for this.

You're about to grab something to hit him with, when Yoongi grabs both of your shirts an pushes you apart.

"What is it with you two today?"

"He started it," you complain.

Yoongi glares at you one last time and lets you go.

You were beyond pissed off but you couldn't deny that it was entertaining to joke around like this.

You both found yourself grinning at each other.

* * *

Dinner was ready.

You had to admit, it looked quite inviting, several dishes with different colors that let out a delicious scent.

You couldn't wait to dig in and the only thing stopping you was the fact that the staff had to try it first in order to decide who the winner was.

You didn't really care about the money.

Shopping wasn't really your thing and even if you won ( which was unlikely to happen), you would probably give it to Hoseok or something. What you did care about was winning.

After the man had a taste out of everything, he prepared to give the final verdict.

The others started making drum sound effects.

You rolled your eyes.

They just had to make everything look as dramatic as possible.

The staff member didn't hesitate.

"The winner is....Jin."

You all groan out of annoyance while Jin gets up from his seat and blows a kiss at the camera.

You didn't stand a chance, anyway.

Who were you to compete with Jin, the Mighty Cook ?

Curse him and his delicious kimbap.

So you dig in, trying everything that was laid out in front of you.

From the corner of your eye you notice Taehyung stuffing enormous amounts of food in his mouth and you smile.

You didn't know why you had started to get so nostalgic lately, but you couldn't help it.

These random moments were the ones that made you realize there wasn't anywhere in the world that you wanted to be , except here, with your family.

* * *

"Let me get this straight. You expect us to fit into that?" You said pointing at the single bed in front of you.

It hadn't really dawned upon you that there was only one single bed on display. And two of you.

At least the others had where to sleep.

Yoongi and Taehyung had gotten the king-sized bed, Namjoon also the same but all to himself, while Jimin, Jin and Hoseok had been assigned on the room consisting of three single beds.

Jungkook scratches the back of his neck.

"You sleep with your head at the front of the bed, while I sleep with mine at the end."

"You mean so we can sleep while hugging each other's legs?"

"You said it, not me."

Despite all of the pent up frustration, you start laughing.

Once you start, it's impossible to stop.

Your sides start to ache and you almost choke on your spit.

Jungkook stares at you, confusion all over his face.

"What?"

"It's just that," you say, still not being able to produce words correctly, " It's weird how they make us go through all of this, and for what? Just so we can film a reality show."

You shake your head, still smiling.

"Yeah, it is kinda weird now that you mention it," Jungkook says.

He goes for the suitcase on the ground and takes out his pyjamas.

"I'm gonna go change in another room," he says. "You can have the room to yourself."

You nod and go for your own pyjamas.

After he's left, you start slipping out of your clothes.

You'd decided to take an RJ pyjama set with you. The tiny characters were so cute and you really didn't care about looking decent even on your sleep.

Then, you hear a knock on the door.

"Come in" , you say and what greets you is Jungkook wearing his own Cooky pajama set. His black hair and pink clothes makes him look conflicting and you can't help but snort.

"Very funny" ,he mocks you.

He takes his own pillow and puts it at the end of the bed. You take your own and set it at the front.

You both lay down, keeping a respectable distance from each other.

"I can't believe I'm gonna have to hear you snoring all night," you say, eyes on the ceiling.

"I don't snore."

"Yes you do."

"Am not."

"Are to."

"Am no - Ow!"

You pinch his leg.

"Hyung, don't make me beat you again."

His body shakes when he laughs, and he claps his hands together. You turn on your side and are greeted with the sight of his toes right in front of your face.

"Hyung?"

"Yeah?"

"Your feet smell."

"I showered half an hour ago. It must be your nose."

You kick him and he laughs again.

"Y/N?"

"If you're gonna tell me my feet smell, I'll shove you out of the bed."

"I was just gonna say good night."

"Oh. Good night, then."

You take a deep breath through your nose and try to fall asleep, the hint of a smile still on your lips.

[izzy-b-hands]

Izzy's birthday! A grenade! Roach would absolutely win GBBO. Ed and Stede, bless their hearts, would not. And a raid!

TW for eyeballs used in a culinary manner. I don't know how else to warn for it except to type it out so. Yeah.

---

"What the fuck are you doing?" Izzy asked, soup spoon paused halfway to his mouth.

"Ed said it's your birthday," Buttons said. "We do presents, party, cake, whole shebang here."

"Is this a grenade?"

Buttons nodded. "My arm isn't what it used to be for tossing them, but if anyone would have fun with it, I figured it'd be you."

Izzy pondered the grenade by his bowl of soup. "This...is lovely, actually. Thank you, Buttons. Next ship we raid will be easy going with this."

Buttons grinned and clapped him on the shoulder before heading out of the dining area.

After a quick check to make sure said grenade wasn't potentially about to go off (he figured Buttons would be one to know the difference, but even so, better to be safe), he returned to his soup. If this was all they'd planned for his birthday, it would be perfect. New weapon, a meal without any interruptions that required his help, perfection. Now if he could get a night of sleep without being dragged out for some trouble, then it would really be above and beyond.

Jim wandered in and peered into the soup pot. "Mind company?"

"If it was most others, I'd say yes," Izzy replied. "But I trust you more to sit and eat and-"

"Not be all weird about your birthday?"

Izzy sighed and closed his eyes. "He told everyone?"

"Dude, he's trying to figure out how to help make the cake. Like, he won't let Roach start it unless he can help."

Izzy opened his eyes. "Well. That's sweet, I suppose."

"I told them to put coffee in. You basically live on it, and if we could get some chocolate or something with it?"Jim smiled. "We'd have a decent cake."

"What do we actually have for it, aside from coffee?"

Jim shrugged. "They started throwing flour at each other so I dipped."

"Understandable, I'd have done the same."

Jim settled across the long table with a bowl and poked at the soup. "Um. Do you know what's in this?"

"I do not, and I wouldn't look too closely. I've been spitting out anything that crunches or squishes too much."

Jim frowned. "We have hardtack, right?"

"By someone's mercy, we do," Izzy smiled, and shoved a bowl of it over to them.

"I'm still gonna try it," Jim said with a deep breath. "And I respect that Roach uses whatever he can find. That's resourceful, and I'm sure I've unknowingly eaten worse-"

Izzy lifted a small eyeball out of his bowl, and they both retched.

"Or, we could have hardtack instead," Jim said. "Bread is always good."

They pushed their bowls away and moved the hardtack one between them as Olu stumbled in, covered in flour.

"You went in the galley," Jim giggled. "How is that going?"

"Stede, Roach, and Ed are arguing how to bake the cake," Olu sighed as he sat beside Jim and snagged a piece of hardtack. "Only one of them actually knows how to. But that isn't stopping Ed and Stede from insisting on their suggestions."

Izzy dropped his head into his arm resting on the table, shaking with nearly silent laughter.

"You good?" Jim asked with a laugh.

"This is the first time he's ever done anything for my birthday," Izzy laughed. "And what a fucking mess. I should go rein him in before Roach stabs him."

"If you do, I'd put on something white," Olu said. "Because this flour was from a bowl that has something else in it, and I don't think it'll come out easy."

Izzy considered it. "They've probably got it."

Olu nodded. "Smart man. Let them handle it, whatever it turns out to be."

They sat for a moment in silence, nibbling away at hardtack that had been sitting long enough to really live up to the name.

"So," Jim broke the silence. "Like I said before, we, that is the two of us, didn't want to be weird about your birthday. But we did get you something."

"I'll let you go get it so I don't get flour on it," Olu said as Jim stood and did a soft jog out. "What the fuck was in that bowl?"

Izzy leaned over, and at Olu's nod, sniffed him. "Some sort of fat or oil. Which they need for a cake, though I question exactly what else might be mixed with it now."

Olu nodded. "However it tastes-"

"Nod and smile," Izzy finished for him. "I never broke Ed's heart over his previous cooking attempts; I won't start now. Baking has never been his thing, but meat? He's wonderful with that. Even made rat taste good."

Olu shook his head. "Rat?"

"Rat. The tail was the only bit I couldn't handle. Texture isn't for me."

Olu looked over to the soup pot in fear.

"I don't think there's rat in that," Izzy said. "Did find an eyeball in my serving though, so I'd stick to the hardtack."

"What kind of eye?"

"No fucking clue," Izzy said.

Jim jogged back in, and handed over a shirt. "It isn't much. But we saw you sewing up your current one and the material not really holding the stitches, so we thought maybe a back up would be cool."

Izzy nodded, and picked up the shirt. Black, soft, with laces at the V of the neckline. "Is this brand new?"

They nodded.

"I haven't had anything new in years," Izzy said. "Thank you."

Olu nodded. "Long overdue then. Just don't wear it today if you have to go into the galley. My clothes are gonna smell like this for awhile now!"

Izzy chuckled. "No we'll-"

There was a small boom, and they rushed out to the deck, Izzy with grenade and shirt in hand.

"Out! Out of my fucking kitchen!" Roach shouted, pushing Ed and Stede out physically with each hand. "You stay out, or I'll bake part of you both in the cake!"

He turned to see the three of them, and nodded to Izzy. "Happy birthday. I'm going to fix your cake and make it edible again."

"Well," Stede huffed. "We were only helping."

"To be fair, I'm not much good at baking," Ed admitted. "My thing is meat and barbecue. Not cakes."

"Kind of you to try though," Izzy said.

"Presents?" Ed motioned towards his hands.

"Yeah," Izzy smiled, a little nervously. "Buttons, and these two."

Jim waved. "Did you guys set something on fire?"

"I...I don't know exactly what went wrong, actually," Ed said.

"The stove may have been a little on fire," Stede said.

"But you were still just mixing the cake mix," Olu frowned. "How did you..."

Ed shrugged. "Baking is a mystery."

"I don't think it's supposed to be that much of a mystery," Olu said.

Just then, another boom, louder this time.

"Oh!" Stede called out. "That wasn't us! We're being shot at! Oh, thank goodness, I was worried we'd really fucked the stove up-"

"Could you hold this for me?" Izzy asked Jim, handing over his new shirt. "Won't be but a moment or two."

He stood at the far rail, watching the ship get closer, grenade in one hand. As soon as it was in reach, he pulled the pin, and threw it hard.

It exploded upon contact with the attacking ship's deck, and there was a delightful ruckus of 'What the fuck?!' shouts that could be heard from the crew there.

"That was so satisfying," Izzy sighed happily as he returned to them, taking his new shirt from Jim. "Thank you again, Buttons!"

Buttons was at one of the cannons, grinning. "Gorgeously done! I think they're fucking off too!"

"Should we go after them?" Olu asked. "Who are they anyway?"

"Some dickfucks who chose the wrong ship to attack," Ed replied. "I say we follow them. However, Izzy, since it's your birthday-"

"I'd like to get some more eyeballs for Roach's next soup," Izzy interrupted. "Let's make them regret those warning shots."

A cheer went up, and Izzy started to move past Ed and Stede to put away his new shirt somewhere safer.

Stede put a hand on his shoulder. "I'm sorry...the soup has what in it?"

"Yeah," Izzy nodded. "It does. I don't know what kind, and I'm not going to ask him either. But he likes any ingredients, so I figure human eyes might work too. If nothing else, we save them for Buttons' birthday."

Stede swallowed hard. "That's a good idea. Do wish I'd known about the eyeballs before eating a few bowls of it earlier."

"The cake should hopefully take that taste out of your mouth," Izzy said. "I'm relying on it to do that for me."

Stede smiled. "Yes, I think it will. I know for sure there's coffee in it, and I know it's probably more fuss than you wanted with the cake and all of this, but the rest of the crew does have some presents, and-"

"I think I'm okay with this fuss," Izzy interrupted him. "It's been...nice. Little weird, but nice."

Stede wrapped him in a hug. "That's the best thing I've heard all day."

"No, the best thing you'll hear all day is those idiots in the other ship surrendering to us," Izzy said. "Will be a lovely gift for myself too. We've been too long without some excitement."

Stede nodded, watching as the opposing crew started to scream as they approached. "We really have been. Oh! Before I forget, let me run and get the new dagger we got for your birthday. This is the perfect opportunity to try it out!"

Izzy watched Stede dash off for his and Ed's quarters, and then looked to the opposing ship.

They looked horrified, as everyone sans Roach (still baking away, and apparently refusing to be interrupted) joined him on deck, weapons in hand.

He hid his new shirt in an empty wooden box on the deck, then waved cheerfully to the panicking crew, now well within sight and boarding distance.

Ed pulled out the long, narrow board and shoved it over to the other ship, and Izzy couldn't help but smile.

This might well be his best birthday yet.