#I usually try not to bring that energy here but uhhh sometimes can’t help myself | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

twistedsimblr · 5 years

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Random Story Facts Tag Game

Created by @fataleromeo

Please use the hashtag [ #randomsf tag ] so I can check yours out!

We all have them. Little bits of our stories that exist only in our heads. Things we know but never seem to find a way to share for whatever reason. Or maybe you’ve mentioned it in passing but haven’t gotten a chance to explain. Either way, here’s your opportunity to spill!

Rules: Copy and paste this into a new post and then tell us five (5!) little bits of trivia about your story. It can be about the characters, plot, you name it. Then tag a few storytelling friends and keep the game going!

I was tagged by The badass @streetlightaurora Who yelled at me for liking pineapple on Pizza AND NOW YOU ALL KNOW! -

Okay, here it goes. It took a while and it’s something I wanted to do for some time but can’t bring myself to do it But anyway here we go... you won’t find this in any posts yet Because this blog was a dumping ground for nsfw until Tumblr put a stake in that coffin. But if you all want me to do this I sure as hell will.

But shyness keeps me from moving forward. There are two ways M.K had met Meg One was while he was in prison she was a doctor who evaluated inmates whose paroles were up to see if they were mentally fit to return to civilian life That I was doing with @princessdejamars but we both kinda felt meh about the issue.

and Two which turns out to be my favorite is that M.K rescued Meg from an underground “smuggling” ring that he’s part of selling goods or shipping goods and picking up special requests for “clients” for a price of course. But here’s how it all went down.

2. Meg was just in her late 20s recently departed from her love of ten years due to circumstances not working out She found herself In San Myshuno shortly after losing her job and her apartment at a Vet clinic taking her chances ( getting a job in this world was piss easy ) She found a job at this massive club re known for having an underground black market and smuggling ring I think it was unnamed And they all preferred to keep it that way Meg just happened to wander there and saw a hiring sign and desperate for a job at this point she popped in and was immediately offered the position

This isn't a post you’ll be able to find just something I’ve been messing with.

Anyways, While working there everyone seemed really nice and found her self taken under wing which helped her fit in a little better who became her friends. Meg went from waitressing like being a cocktail girl to a girl that learned to pole dance becoming everything she didn’t think she’d end up being. She ran into some issues because some wanted a little more than what they got on stage and Meg refused... This caused a lot of complaints. Now M.K was a regular at this place. He actually did some blood sports which earned him the title of “Big Cat” because he would fight his opponents to the death as that's what this was. This club was more than just a club it had a huge probably illegal variety of operations underground the club He’d win almost every time with a bite to the neck or major artery in the shoulder Also replenishing what he needed most blood as with most vampires they utilize a blood pool and the more energy he uses the “hungrier” he gets even though he’s a hybrid .

Where does Meg come in? He smelled “human” of course lol I mean who wouldn’t its a supernatural bar and Humans don’t typically come there This bothered him tremendously thinking that perhaps she was a spy playing dumb and playing it cool and doing a damn good job at it.

He was a smuggler of course who didn’t really plan on going back to prison any time soon He’d already been caught once Hiding was hard enough. he didn’t want anyone to blow his cover or uncover what was going on here. So He kind of followed her around in private observing her. He did have some slight interaction with her mostly brief and sort of standoffish

When he was around and he continued to stalk when she was at the place not at home though. His stalking would end up saving her life. When she wasn’t there. His friends were beginning to think he had some kind of interest in this woman being so ballsy

Which he denied, of course, lol thinking she was still some undercover cop playing dumb That’s when a female colleague mentioned something about seeing her being “taken” By a rival a real douche bag that did an entirely different kind of smuggling of “goods”

So M.K did some investigating despite Meg being relatively well cared for provided the necessities she needed including makeup though she was familiar with had someone uh professionally do it for her. She was placed in a very dark part of smuggling

To prepare her for potential buyers usually other smugglers or um whatever disgusting creatures wanted a little fun they could even “try before you buy” So Meg was being held in a tent. Each tent had a picture of the we’ll call them “servants” for sale and he found Megs It was then he realized she wasn’t a cop at all and he actually felt kind of bad That is until he heard screaming coming from her tent but it wasn’t her own. and As he got closer he saw a guy make a VERY QUICK EXIT holding his lower bits which were covered in blood demanding a refund. Which he didn’t get the guy cautions M.K who buys Meg calling him nuts to which M.K replies “Eh I kinda like my women a little freaky with a big toothy grin quickly ending that conversation So Meg ends up being his “slave” so to speak.

3. My ideas are all over the place. I don’t follow anyone's stories I make up my own I love to write always have thought it’s not overly popular I use to roleplay in the Super Smash Bros community as a Meta Knight sought out by a few groups that I refused to join because I ...HATE...RULES. plus there was this reincarnation as a strange uhhh mythical beast bs god my head hurts just thinking about it

Anyways M.K rescues Meg and tells her She’s free and probably should leave this part of town maybe even go home. She tells him nowhere to go anyway and couldn’t even get a plane ticket to go home to Canada if she wanted to and had been evicted from her apartment due to the fact she was unable to pay rent on time making her homeless. And breaks down. Ashamed what she’d become. So she had nowhere to go. M.K feels bad for her not wanting to be more of a bad guy than he actually was he lets her live with him in his super awesome apartment in San Myshuno, not a penthouse but it was a very nice apartment Under one condition She sometimes had to wear sexy outfits when carrying out regular tasks because technically she was still his slave.. He didn’t make her do anything sexual at first but it wasn’t long until curiosity/ love/ lust had blossomed. They both weren’t really looking for anything at the start it just sort of happened.

4. Things would slightly fall apart at first When Meg later discovers she’s pregnant She becomes resentful angry at M.K for doing this to her because she didn’t want kids and to be honest neither did he. and believed she was infertile . So both stupidly became a little careless Neither knew what to do because it wasn’t just one baby it was two Ren and A.J M.K disappeared shortly after he bought a house days before Meg was due to give birth only to come back days later though a little different. (that’s a different story I will get into.)

Truth be told she somewhat fears him even though he has never ever laid a hand on her just his appearance alone is intimidating enough and quite often he would use that to get what he wanted.

5. Brace your self this might make you cry. Or hate me.

This story I have in my head two of the kids A.J and Fae die. In the future maybe Archie survives and Hunter All the kids with high hybrid content survive

Also, I’m debating whether or not to have my simself die Or having M.K go back to make Meg realize she’s a witch of sorts

Or He just thinks she had died or something But to be honest I am leaning toward her death. Leaving just M.K and Ren ( Don’t worry the story I plan has a happy ending of course Who doesn’t like a good happy ending how if Meg dies? Only time will tell ;) )

But This story allows everything to fall into place in an area where it just makes sense right down to M.K’s tattoos. I also thought it would be interesting to note that M.K spends a lot of time with Meg because he knows this is going to happen in the future which leaves the other kids sort of neglected. So he wants to change what happens.

And The other kids seem to be more independent and not as bothered by it but Ren Is curious.

And she kind of starts investigating things. To a point where M.K has to step in and sort of intimidating her to get her to back off a bit.

Which only makes her even more curious eventually, in the end, she ends up finding it out or he tells her himself making her promise not to say a word to anyone and that could have caused his graying hair haha. But Ren promises him she won't say anything and she keeps her word and he offers her vampire training because of it to make sure she doesn’t even though she didn’t directly ask for it it’s kind of their thing the way they bond. When that time comes when the earth is thrown into turmoil Meg and the rest act a certain way and Ren shifts her focus toward her mother who tries to push the idea on her that she might be a witch but is blown off by Meg after M.K tried to do the same.

So I thought perhaps Meg's body physically can’t handle being off earth as she is still human And didn’t know she was a witch and M.K didn’t force her to explore that possibility which M.K goes back in time to change thinking it might save her life. Because she dies slowly wastes away.

Testing M.Ks tolerance more and more until after Meg dies after resources become harder and harder to obtain he becomes a changed man full of guilt and hatred toward himself for a decision he made that he thought would help his family due to the world's resources being used up they had to relocate to Sixam. He becomes a cold-hearted and distant pushing away his two remaining kids and invested heavily in smuggling as well as likely drinking to the point where he’s trying to hurt himself where most would have poisoning. Acting like he just wants to die. He abandons them and goes into hiding for long time.

Everything is routine to M.K like he feels nothing. He fights a good fight to defend his cargo from pirates because well it’s his job and it pays a pretty penny who doesn’t like money? But he’s killed a lot of people good people. As he’s also an assassin of sorts maybe? Or just looking out for his daughter ;) despite him becoming this ruthless monster.

Eventually, Ren becomes a Bounty Hunter / Chief of the Space Rangers and is forced to face and bring her father to justice for the crimes he’d committed as a smuggler and hunt him down due to how chaotic he’d become Ren really does feel sorry for him he’d become so broken She finds him hiding in their old house that’s in really bad shape at this point pictures lay scattered everywhere. He tells her “He knew from day one that she was special She just had this aura about her and was proud of what she’d become and her mother would feel the same and how she had her mothers smile and that Heès sorry he failed her. But despite her and his differences her mother’s dying words were to protect Ren And she realizes all those times she was in danger it was her father getting her out of those tight spots she got her self in sometimes was him all along to which she couldn’t figure out some instances that should have gotten her killed didn’t . So as much as she wanted to say” No you failed yourself.” She couldn’t

That despite how terrible he’d become he still loved and cared about her the most`. Causing her to struggle to keep it together This causes Ren to reconsider killing him because he’s wanted either dead or alive at this point and was armed with the weapons to do it. M.K insists and puts her gun or knife to his chest/head “Well get on with it I have no fight in me left I just want to see your mother again.”

They struggle for a moment making this moment rather emotional until Ren tells him there’s a better way which M.K was only seconds from forcing her to pull the trigger or to stab him . And she couldn’t do it - She says “ Daddy” her voice become shaken.

Which is something M.k hadn’t heard from her in a very long time and he stops almost immediately “She tells him again there’s a better way.

They become surrounded and Ren ushers M.K into the deeper part of the house that was underground that nobody knew about and where he’d be safe where the safe is in that room, There was a sleep pod that He’d forgotten all about She tells him Remember when Mom got mad when you bought this stupid thing? Clearing off all the rubble she tells him she can tweak it to act like a cryostasis Tesseract thing with the wiring and Sends him back in time. M.K, before he goes, gives Ren his dog tag or something of value to prove that it was done and tells her to burn the house down. after She knows he made it. She asks how will I know. And he tells her She’ll know. With a wink.

. After M.K goes back in time Ren burns the house down. and emerges from the home with his dog tag or whatever it is I decide to use and tells everyone it’s been done. And to move along. After the fire has cleared Ren returns back to the house and seals up the bottom of the house with concrete with the help of her two remaining brothers Archie and Hunter They salvage what wasn’t damaged As keepsakes. Ren builds like this tomb surrounding this basement and hires security to keep this area safe The world thinks M.K is dead but he isn’t he’s just enjoying a long walk on memory lane with his beloved for all eternity and that is what you see on my blog how sad is that!.

I tag: @omg-puddingpie (WHEN HE COMES BACK OR IF HE DOES! @whitesagesims @fayts4 @princessdejamars @sparkiemonkey @hunksims @cupcakegnome @simdertalia @berrysweetboutique @sixamsims @missrubybird @willowsblood @cherryicecreamsims @geeky-simz @the-piquantsimblr @missguided-sims @jenpants @lupuspuellasims and anyone else who has the time to do this!

#randomsf tag #long post

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stephhannes · 4 years

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new year, who dis

what would be the use in becoming a symbol of walking desolation? awash in multiple griefs, elaborating on anguish. even if i never get to see you again, i’ll know that when we collided we both broke each other open.

-mount eerie, love without possession

i guess it’s been four months since i’ve sat down to write an actual blog. i figured i should at least try to get something out before the new year.

i’ve tried to write an update a few times over the last couple of months, but every time i tried to write something, it’s just aggressively sad. like that one st. vincent lyric— i try to write you a love song, but it comes out a lament. and while an aggressively sad tone is appropriate to how i’ve been feeling, i’ve been trying to bring less sad energy to the table. (a surprise to everyone, because sad energy is my entire brand).

I planned to get this blog up by january 1st. and then i kept putting it off. hence why this starts off saying things like, “i guess it’s been four months,” and “i figured i should at least try to get something out before the new year.” today is february 4th, which means it’s officially been a year and a half since nathan died.

in the last few weeks, i’ve been under a lot of stress. i’m juggling three jobs right now, and somehow still don’t make enough money to survive. i’m sure that at this point, i’ve described to you my bona-fide money saving technique. it’s called “i only eat three days a week because it’s too expensive to feed myself every day,” sometimes, i get lucky, and get the scraps from events at work, and that’s literally like the one (1) thing i look forward to.

i’m still out here searching for a salary (and health insurance) and hopefully, by my birthday, i’ll have that. but we’ll see, the job search has been uhhh…..abysmal to say the least.

anyways, in the midst of being stressed, i’ve realized that i really don’t think about nathan all the time like i used to. sometimes i’ll go like two days before i’m reminded of him. the other day, i was like “am i a bad person because of this?” and like, logically, i know that it’s totally normal, but on the other hand, i can’t help but feel guilty because of it sometimes. i feel a sense of responsibility to exist as a reminder of “hey, this person existed, and they mattered,” and while i realize that’s a huge weight to put onto myself, i feel like if i don’t, then who will?

last night, i was reading house of leaves (which, despite owning a copy since high school, i’ve actually never read it before) and i found nathan’s bookmark (a ticket from a baseball game he went to right after he moved to new york) in it, from when i let him take a few of my books when he moved to nyc. i got weirdly emotional and was like “wow what a fun coincidence to find this item of nathan’s that i’ve never seen before in my life on the 1.5 year anniversary of him dying.” i’m not saying i’m superstitious, but maybe i am a little stitious.

+++

since the last time i wrote a blog, i’ve kept notes on my phone every time something happens that i feel holds some sort of importance- so here’s what’s been in my notes since august 4th.

august 24, 2019. 4:17am

when i went into work on august 5th, a coworker of mine asked how i was doing. i was doing alright. the anniversary of nathan’s death really didn’t hit me too hard. i assumed i would have a huge nervous breakdown, and i didn’t.

then my coworker, who’d also lost a partner, told me, “i hate to sound negative and be the one to tell you this but the second year is a lot harder than the first.”

that’s what i’d been reading online for months, but to hear someone say it to my face i was just like… oh shit.

and so far, the second year has been harder.

i’ve officially been out on my own for a month now.

the best part about having depression is that no matter where you are, you still have depression. i don’t know why i was expecting moving to just alleviate all of my sadness when i know that i’ll always find a way to be miserable wherever i am.

it’s nice to be out of abilene and at least have the option of opportunity, but i basically just spend all of my free time asleep or crying.

as the ancient oracle, britney spears, once said- “my loneliness is killing me.”

now that i’ve started getting into a routine, i’m starting to feel that hole in my life again.

i’m on the same schedule that i was when i lived in new york, almost.

when we lived in new york, i would leave for work around 4, i’d get home around 11:30, and then nathan and i would hang out until around 4am, and then go to bed. the next day, he’d usually wake me up at a normal time, (or at least 2 hours before i had to be at work).

and now i have to leave for work around 4:30, i get home around 11, and when i come home i’m just alone. and i lay in bed until i’m finally exhausted enough to fall asleep, usually around 5am. and then i wake up ten minutes before i have to go to work.

i have been feeling this deep, existential sadness for awhile now. every night, i lay in bed and think about all of the conversations i wish i could revisit with nathan. all of the things i wish i’d said. i relive all of my favorite moments of ours. i am still so desperate to feel close to him again.

i cannot remember a time in my life when i was excited to wake up. i cannot remember a time when i looked forward to my future. in fact, when i think about my mental health as a child, the only thing i remember is one time when i was 12, my dad bought me tickets to see my favorite band. i was obviously so incredibly excited, and expressed the human emotion of joy, and my mother accused me of being on drugs because she’d “never seen me act like that before.” it was so surprising to her to see me happy that she literally thought i was on drugs.

i’ve been like this for as long as i can remember, except for the two years that nathan and i were together. i was still so depressed when we lived together, but for the first time, i was looking forward to the future. for the first time, dealing with my depression seemed worth it. for the first time, putting effort into getting better made sense.

for the first time in my life, i didn’t feel alone.

and it took a lot of effort on nathan’s part to make sure that i didn’t feel alone. the loneliness i’ve always felt is like a self-fulfilling prophecy. i actively choose to retreat from friendships and relationships. i stop responding to texts. i hide away and cancel plans. it’s my fault that i feel isolated- because i isolate myself. and nathan refused to let me do that. when i get stressed, i internalize everything and take it all on my own- and nathan would recognize when i was doing that and beg me to let him help. and i wouldn’t let him help. but he would still do it, because he knew what i needed without me asking and would just quietly provide it for me so that i wouldn’t lose my mind. and a lot of the time the help was just him actively sitting me down and reminding me that i’m in fact, not alone. i’ll never forget when i was so stressed after moving to new york because i was so poor, and nathan telling me that “it’ll be okay. we’ll figure it out.” i never asked him for money, or for help, because i have too much pride for that. but even when i was working, i was struggling to make ends meet for myself, and he would sneakily do things like go to the grocery store and be like “oh hey, i was at the store today and just picked up some chicken for you so you don’t have to go yourself.” there were a few times when i asked him to pick up something from the halal cart for me because i didn’t want to get out of bed and i’d be like “there’s cash in my wallet just grab it” but instead of taking the money from my wallet, he’d just get the food for me, and put the change he had leftover in my wallet for me to have.

but even past that, just emotionally, he’d always reassure me that i wasn’t alone. as soon as he started to sense me doing the thing where i try to isolate myself, he’d just cling to me even harder.

here’s the thing: i’m too tired to fight for myself, and i don’t have anyone that’ll fight for me the way that nathan did.

august 29th, 2019. 5:32pm

so here’s the tea: i went on a date for the first time since nathan died. i went out last night, got drunk, got on bumble and agreed to go on a date this morning. so yeah, i was aggressively hungover, which is maybe not the best version of me for someone to meet- but it’s the version i brought to the table nonetheless. and like, it was fine. well, up until the point he was trying to relate to me and my career in theatre and told me that his favorite musical is CATS. his favorite cat is the rum tum tugger, and he can’t wait to see the movie in december.

it’s not going to work out. CATS is an abomination and i refuse to spend time with anyone who disagrees with that statement.

on a more serious note: i realized that i definitely don’t have the emotional capacity to date. i just can’t bring myself to care about anything anyone has to tell me about themselves. you have two sisters, your parents divorced when you were 8 and and you love CATS? zzzzz….sorry, that was me blacking out for 7 minutes.

y’know, i’m unsure about a lot of things in my life. like, don’t try to ask me what i want for dinner because i refuse to make a decision about anything. don’t ask me what my favorite movie is, or my favorite book. i have no idea, dude, sorry. BUT the one thing i have incredible clarity about is what i deserve in a relationship. i had impossibly high standards before nathan and i were together and now they’re even higher- but that’s fine when you don’t have the emotional capacity to deal with scrubs to begin with.

the other day, i found my journal that i kept in college. it starts in august of 2015, with the eulogy i wrote for my dad’s funeral. an excerpt: “despite me acting like an awful teen at times, he always was on my side. i think that’s what i’ll miss the most. i’ll miss having someone who had my back 100%. i’ll miss having someone who was always making sure i was happy…” and after reading that, i realized why my relationship with nathan was so successful. i’ve always heard that “girls always end up marrying someone like their dad” thing, and for the most part always chalked it up to weird patriarchal bullshit, but maybe there’s a little truth in it. because i definitely see some of my favorite things about my dad reflected in my favorite things about nathan.

september 30, 2019. 1:09am

sometimes the saddest things must be sung.

every time i try to write, it’s impossible to say anything that’s not just “i’m sad.” i haven’t been feeling great lately. i just feel trapped in this infinite loop of sadness and it’s so exhausting. i don’t like being like this. nathan would always get so frustrated with me when my depression was really bad, and i’d always be like do you think this is fun for me??? do you think i like being like this??? do you think i wake up and want to be a goblin??? newsflash my dude, i don’t.

here’s the thing: when nathan first died, i was sad all the time. but it made sense. i had a reason to be sad all of the time.

but i’m still sad all of the time. i wake up, i’m sad for 10 hours and then i go to bed. and then i wake up, maybe go to work, come home and be sad until bedtime. it’s a constant loop of sadness and i am so tired.

nothing i do fulfills me. nothing satisfies me. i have neither purpose nor direction. i’m tired. and i’m sad.

october 2nd, 2019. 7:34pm

i went to urgent care today- turns out i don’t have depression, i just have a torn ligament in my ankle.

for context: i fell down the stairs at work the other day, crunched my ankle like it was an empty ozarka water bottle, and just wrecked my shit. i think this injury has me sadness spiraling a lot more than i normally do. now i get why nathan used to get so depressed whenever he’d injure himself.

the first time i got really sick after nathan died, i was so sad. this is my first ever really bad physical injury- i’ve never broken a bone or torn anything before, and i’m really feeling the loss of nathan right now. like how am i supposed to feed myself when i can barely walk to the kitchen? who’s supposed to remind me to take my ibuprofen every few hours?

senior year of college, i kept getting strep, and the only reason i didn’t die is because every 12 hours nathan would call me to make sure i took my antibiotics, even when i had to take them at 2am. i only have two voicemails from him saved on my phone and literally one of them is from 3am and he’s like “hello wake up, your penicillin is calling, i’m gonna keep calling you until you wake up.”

even though spraining my ankle was a nightmare, it could’ve been worse. just think, if i was a framing device in an emily bronte novel, i would have just had to live at work for five weeks until it healed.

october 11th, 2019. 5:37pm

i haven’t been sleeping lately, and last night i fell asleep around 6am. the cold front had just blown in and it was raining and i finally fell asleep. before i went to bed, i cracked my windows open for the first time this year and when i woke up this morning it was chilly in my room. i woke up in a little cocoon of all of my blankets and pillows and for a moment, before i completely opened my eyes, it felt like i was back in new york, waking up with nathan on a fall wednesday morning. it’s the little things.

october 25th, 2019. 2:19am

i keep thinking about all the things that have returned to me. all of the things that i gave to nathan that are back in my possession, tucked away in my room. like the grey ut shirt that was 3 sizes too big for me- so i gave it to him as a christmas present our first year together. he had been in new york for a semester, and he surprised me by coming to austin for new year’s- we hadn’t talked about christmas gifts or anything, but we ended up giving each other almost the exact same gift. he had gotten me a columbia sweater, and he slept in it for a few days before giving it to me, so it smelled like him. i did the exact same thing with that grey shirt. we couldn’t stop laughing when we exchanged the gifts because we were so amused that we’d gotten the same thing for each other.

after he died, that shirt was one of the few that i kept of his, he slept in it all the time when we lived together. it still smells like him.

i don’t wear my rings anymore, but when i see them in the bottom of my jewelry box, i think about the day that i gave him the engagement ring. he was so afraid of me saying no if he were to propose to me, so i told him that when i knew i’d say yes- i’d give him the ring i wanted him to use. on our first anniversary, i was visiting him in new york, right before i flew back to texas, i left a letter on his desk, with the ring attached. it returned to me a year after that, on our second anniversary when he proposed.

the day after nathan died, i went through all of his stuff. mostly because i knew i was about to fly back to texas and i didn’t know when i’d return to our apartment, so i wanted to collect all of his important documents that i didn’t want to lose. social security card, IDs, cards, passport, etc. but when i was digging through his backpack, i found a folder, where he’d kept all of the letters and cards i’d given to him throughout the years.

my personal favorite was an envelope that had two things in it: a sample size of the perfume that i’ve always worn, and a letter that just said “for when you miss me.” i gave that to him before we were even together. it was during that weird ambiguous era of our relationship where we were too afraid to commit, but were definitely in too deep to not commit. every time i would leave his apartment, he’d comment on how his pillows smelled like me, and how he missed me- right after he made his decision to go to columbia, we assumed we would never see each other again, so i gave him that letter.

i was surprised to see all of those letters because that meant that he moved them from his apartment in abilene, to new york, to our apartment in new york, back to texas, and then to philly.

so in turn, i moved them from philly, back to abilene, and now they’re with me in a box in austin.

and i hope that one day all of the love that i gave to nathan will return to me.

november 4th, 2019. 12:31am

in the deepest, blackest night of despair if you can get just one pinhole of light, all of grace rushes in.

november 19th, 2019. 2:20am

i’ve started taking up space again.

december 20th, 2019. 1:41pm

y’know, i’ve been doing pretty well for myself lately, and by that i mean that i haven’t had any major meltdowns. well, except for a couple of days ago. it was a christmas party, and as we all know- i’m not great at being social. but i also never turn down an invitation, which is a strange combination of things that happen to exist at the core of my being. but luckily, i got a plus one. see, with a plus one, i have a buffer there. i can bring one of my more interesting friends to carry conversations for me and then by proxy i become more able to socialize because i have to expend less energy by having that buffer there. anyways the person i was bringing as my plus one cancelled two hours before the event which meant that i had no time to try to get someone else to come with me. and this threw me into a major breakdown. i didn’t even want to go to the party at this point, but i had spent so much money on an outfit that if i didn’t go i would have wasted like 60 dollars. and i sat there trying to put makeup on to go but i kept crying and ruining it and then i chugged three white claws before even showing up at the party and i didn’t eat beforehand because there was supposed to be food there but by the time i was done crying and arrived, there was nothing left and then i drank 5 glasses of wine because it was free and i have social anxiety, and somehow i made it through the night without making a fool of myself, which is a miracle.

the thing is, i really don’t get upset about a lot of things. but if someone cancels or changes plans on me, especially plans that we’d had set for at least a month in advance, i lose my god damn mind. there is historically nothing that upsets me more.

but this time around, i realized that it really hurt me because it was the first time that i was confronted with the fact that i no longer have anyone in my life that prioritizes me. like, if nathan was begrudgingly my plus one to an event, he can’t get out of it- it’s non-negotiable. but like, i don’t hold that level of importance in anyone else’s life- there’s always something more important to them and uhhhhh that feeling sucks.

+++

and that was the last note i wrote in 2019. which brings us to january 2020. when i think about my relationship with nathan, i feel like january always ended up being a special month for us. in 2016, january was the first time i ever spent the night with nathan. in 2017, nathan came back to texas to see me for the new year, after we’d been long-distance for five months. at the end of 2017, he went out of town for like three weeks, and i was miserable and all alone for the holidays, but in january 2018, his last day of vacation back home in abilene coincided with my first day of vacation back in abilene so we got to see each other for a little bit instead of having to go an entire month apart during the holidays.

so i always end up getting weird and do a lot of reminiscing in january- but i feel like that’s kind of universal.

like the #1 thing that everyone does is get all existential and contemplative when the new year hits.

+++

in 2018, i never stopped moving. like a shark, i would have died if i stayed in one place for too long. and there i was in 2019, finally staying in one place.

it was a lot easier to ask for help when i had a reason to be sad. but now enough time has passed since nathan died that i feel like a burden when i’m not doing well.

in my blog post wrapping up 2018, i said that my goal was to be kinder to myself. i also said that 2019 was going to be for starting a new life.

and while i’ve been no kinder to myself, at least i’ve made strides in living in this new phase of my life. in 2019 i moved out of my mother’s house, and back into my best friend’s apartment in austin. i got 3 jobs. i cut off all of my hair and pierced my nose. i started taking up space again.

a few weeks ago, a coworker of mine told me that she had also lost a partner before. but what stuck with me was when she said, “you will never be the same. you’ll be happy again, and you’ll fall in love again- but you’ll never be the same person again”

and i’m realizing how true that is.

i think one of the scariest scenarios is waking up one day and not remembering who you are. and that’s exactly what happened to me in 2018. i woke up one day without nathan and couldn’t remember who i was.

one thing everyone’s been talking about lately is how this is the end of the decade, and i realized that nathan was in my life for the entire decade. he was in my life before the decade even started. and then when he died, i lost such a huge part of my identity. there’s a bear’s den lyric that’s like “i don’t want to know who i am without you,” and that’s what 2019 was for me.

kintsugi is the japanese art of fixing broken pottery by mending the areas of breakage with a lacquer mixed with powdered gold. i’ve always been a vase held by shaky hands, constantly on the precipice of shattering- and in 2018 i was dropped. in 2019, i’ve been finding tiny pieces of myself and trying to piece them back together to form a whole person again.

recently, i’ve been realizing all of the little pieces of me that are missing. like the part of me that used to be good at holding conversations with people. and the part of me that had the ability to be a person for more than like 3 hours a day. and the part of me that showed excitement about things. i don’t even know what things excite me anymore? do i have interests or hobbies? not really. one time, i described myself as a robot that powers off if i am not at work, and wow, what an apt description.

the other day, one of my friends called me out about how she can never tell if i’m actually excited about something or not. my language is always very vague and even when i’m really stoked about something, i rarely show excitement about it.

+++

so now it’s february 2020. it’s been a year and a half since nathan died. i’m feeling better. the other day, i came to the realization that i think my emotions have finally leveled off. i’m back to my normal amount of unstable, rather than that really virulent level that i was at for awhile at the end of last year. it feels good to finally have a little bit of control back over my life. i’ve finally really settled in at work, and i’m starting to feel more confident in my capabilities.

so what are my goals for 2020? i think the biggest thing is to find something that i care about. honestly, probably a big part of the reason why i’ve been having such a hard time finding a Big Girl Job to settle into is because there’s just nothing that i’m 100% passionate about. it’s hard for me to find an answer other than “i’m just trying to not die,” whenever i get asked “so why do you want this job?” i really want to find lasting stability this year. i’m tired of not being able to enjoy anything because i don’t have money. whoever said money can’t buy happiness obviously was never poor because let me tell you, i’d be a lot happier if i could afford to go out with my friends more often. or if i could like…….eat 3 meals a day without feeling guilty for wasting food because i know i can live on just one meal a day.

i also started doing a skincare routine that involves like 4 different serums and i’ve been doing really well keeping up with doing it twice a day and if i could carry that energy through the rest of the year that’d be dope. i would make a comment about how i’ve been going to the gym every day and how i’m trying to have a 2020 glo-up but i was going to the gym every day for awhile but i haven’t been in like two weeks.

also my chemical romance just reunited so i guess my other 2020 goal is to see them on this reunion tour.

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vgckwb · 5 years

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ML: Are They Worthy? Chapter 47: Darkside!/Dark Kitty

Gabriel was pacing around his office. Nathalie was watching. “So, you want me to meet with Judgement Wolf to see if we can figure something out,” he said.

“That’s the idea” Nathalie said.

Gabriel looked at his assistant. “Do you think this could work?” he asked.

“It’s worth trying” Nathalie said. “You would want to pursue any avenue to bring back Emilie, right?”

Gabriel looked out his window. “Of course,” he said. “But I would need a way for him to get to me without him revealing my identity.”

“We can think of a few options” Nathalie said.

“Very well” Gabriel said. “Let’s make an attempt.”

Meanwhile, after school, Luka and Juleka were walking out of school. “Hey!” a voice shouted at them. The siblings looked at the point of origin. She was an older girl, about 17, and she had orange hair in a ponytail, glasses, brown eyes, a white shirt, a green hoodie that was unzipped, a red and black plaid skirt, black stockings, white and green tennis shoes, and a black case strapped upon her back. She ran up to them carefully. “You’re the two guitarists of Kitty Section, right?”

“Um, yeah?” Luka said.

“What’s this about?” Juleka asked.

The mystery girl set her case down, opened it, and pulled out a black bass. “I wanna join you band!”

“Ummmmmm, OK?” Luka said.

“I can join?!” she asked.

“No” Luka said. “I mean, not yet. We’d have to audition you first.”

“Yeah, and this is kind of a friend thing, and you just kind of showed up” Juleka said. “Sooooooo…..”

The girl smiled and nodded. “I get it. We can do that. Can we do it now?”

“Uhhh, we weren't planning on meeting today…” Luka said.

“Please?” the girl asked.

Luka sighed. “It wouldn’t hurt to ask Rose and Ivan.”

“I guess not” Juleka said. “I’m still not sure about her though.”

The girl giggled. “I’m sorry. I haven’t even introduced myself yet. My name is Ashe.”

“Well, I’m Juleka, and that is my brother Luka” she said, pointing at Luka who was texting.

“Well, I’ve got an OK from Rose. Now let’s see what Ivan says” Luka said.

Mylene was approaching Ivan, who was checking his phone. “So, do we have plans this afternoon?” she asked.

Ivan looked up sadly. His sadness transferred to Mylene. “The band just called an emergency meeting. Is it OK if I go?”

Mylene felt left out, but she said “Of course.”

“Great! And I promise you, we’ll do something tomorrow!” Ivan said. He gave Mylene a kiss on the cheek and left. Mylene felt bitter about the decision and got out her phone and started texting.

Later, Mylene was sitting on a park bench by herself. “Hey Mylene!” Marinette called out. Mylene turned to see Marinette waiving with Alya right behind her.

The two sat down next to Mylene. “So, what’s up girl?” Alya asked.

Mylene looked down. “Well, it’s just, Ivan’s been spending a lot of time with Kitty Section lately. I’m worried we aren’t spending enough time together anymore.”

“Do you think Ivan doesn’t like you anymore?” Alya asked.

“That’s insane. Ivan is crazy about you” Marinette said.

“Yeah, he got akumatized twice because he didn’t know how to tell you he loved you” Alya said.

“Not helping” Marinette said.

“It’s not that” Mylene said. “It’s just, whenever Ivan and I aren’t spending time together, and I’m not doing anything with you guys, he’s off doing something he’s passionate about. Meanwhile, I just spend my time missing Ivan. I just don’t know what to do with myself.”

Marinette and Alya looked at each other and nodded. “Well, we’re here now” Alya said.

“Yeah” Marinette said. “So, do you want to be with him, or like, figure out something you want to do on your own?”

Mylene looked up. “I like that second choice. You all have your own passions. I wanna find something for myself!”

“That a girl” Alya said. “So, let’s brainstorm. Your father’s an actor, do you wanna try that?”

Mylene shook her head. “You remember how I did during the movie we made. I don’t feel comfortable doing that kind of thing. At least not yet.”

“Well, you’re so kind and gentle. Why don’t you try volunteering somewhere?” Marinette suggested. There are animal shelters, charities…”

“My mom works at a food pantry sometimes” Alya said. “They always need help there.”

Mylene looked determined. “Alright. Let’s do it!” Marinette and Alya smiled. The three of them left.

Meanwhile, at the Liberty, Kitty Section was sitting down while Ashe was on stage. “Thanks for letting me try out” she said. “I know you just met me, but I hope you’ll be impressed.”

“Before you start, we have a few questions” Luka said.

“Shoot” Ashe said.

“How’d you find out about us?” Ivan asked.

“I saw some of your videos online” Ashe said. “You’re pretty good.”

“Why do you want to join us?” Rose asked. “Not that I would mind…”

Ashe looked at the band. “I really like music. I’ve always wanted to play in a band. The way I see it: you need a bassist. I can play bass. Simple as that.”

“What makes you think you’ll be a good fit for Kitty Section?” Luka asked.

Ashe smiled slyly. “From what I’ve seen, you guys play my kind of music. I really admire your energy and attitude.”

“Are you nice?” Juleka asked.

Ashe was taken aback by that question. “She means ‘Do you think you can friends with us?’” Luka explained. “We’re a tightly knit group. You could play well, but if you’re only here to play, than I suggest you leave.”

Ashe smiled. “I see. Well, I certainly hope we can be friends.” She sighed. “Most of mine abandoned me…”

The band was shocked. “I’m sorry” Juleka said.

“No, you’re right,” Ashe said. “Getting along is just as important as being able to play well. Now, are you ready?”

“Go for it” Luka said. Ashe began to play for them.

Meanwhile, Mylene, Marinette, and Alya arrived at the food pantry. Alya waived down the person in charge. “Hi Marie” she said.

“Hello” Marie said. Marie had black hair tied up in a ponytail, a grey shirt, jeans, black shoes, and an apron.

“This is Mylene” Alya said, introducing her. “She’d like to help around here.”

“Oh, how wonderful!” Marie said. “Just take an apron, and, let’s see… OH! I know. Lorenzo needs some help sorting cans. Why don’t you start there?”

“OK” Mylene said. She went to grab an apron.

“And, since you two have been here before, why don’t you help with deliveries?” Marie asked.

“Uh, sure!” Marinette said.

Mylene walked into a room and saw a lanky boy with black hair, olive eyes, a black hoodie zipped up with an apron over it, jeans, and black Chucks. “Um, are your Lorenzo?” Mylene asked.

The boy looked up. “Yes. And you are?”

Mylene smiled. “Mylene. I just started here. Marie says I should help you.”

“Well then, let’s get started” Lorenzo said. “I’ll show you the ropes.”

Mylene learned from Lorenzo and together, they sorted cans all afternoon. The two became fast friends. The same was happening over that the Liberty. Kitty Section was impressed by Ashe’s playing skills, and they started a jam session once the solo stuff was out of the way.

Once their sessions was over, Luka said, “Man, that felt great.”

“Yeah, I’d say you pass” Juleka said.

“Me too!” Rose said.

“I agree!” Ivan said.

Ashe looked at Luka. “Well, what do you think?”

Luka smiled back at her. “Yeah, I’d say you pass.”

“Yes!” Ashe said, pumping her fist.

Anarka rushed out. She looked worried, but then saw Ashe and was curious. “My, who be this?” she said.

“Oh. Right. This is Ashe” Luke said.

“Hi” Ashe said.

“Well, hello” Anarka said. She squinted her eyes and then returned inside.

“What was that about?” Ashe asked.

“I don’t know” Luka said.

“Yeah, usually mom is a lot more free spirited” Juleka said. “I should go check on her.” She went inside.

Luka looked at Ashe. “So, why do you play bass?” he asked.

“Well, I can play an assortment of instruments” Ashe said. “I’ve learned when I was very young. But the bass has always been my favorite. My mom plays bass, so I feel connected with her when I play it.”

“I see” Luka said.

Richard’s car pulled up and Richard got out. He looked onto the boat. “It’s her!” he called out.

May got out and got a look. She started to approach the ship. “Oh no” Ashe said.

“What?” Luka said.

“Ashley!” May said, getting close to the ship.

Ashe shrunk into herself. “Hi mom…”

“Mom?” Luka said.

“Yes” Juleka said, coming out on deck with her mom. “Apparently, she’s May’s child. She ran away when she and her dad were in Versailles. He called May, May told dad, and dad told mom, who upon seeing Ashe knew who she was, and called dad back that she had been found.”

Luka looked at Ashe in disbelief. “Is this true?”

“Yeah…” Ashe said.

“Ashley!” May said, getting on the boat. She hugged her daughter. “Don’t scare us like that!”

“I was fine” Ashe said.

May broke the hug. “Your father was really worried.”

“Good!” Ashe said. “He deserves it!”

“What’s gotten into you?” May said.

“Everything!” Ashe said.

May was shocked. “Well, I’m sure we can talk it over with your father once we get to London.”

“No!” Ashe said. “I hate it in London! I’m never going back! Everyone hates me there!”

“Honey, you can’t mean that” May said

“I do!” Ashe cried out. “School is a nightmare. Dad’s away a lot of the time. You left me. No one cares about me…”

May saw that her child was upset. “Well, I’m sure we can figure something out,” she said.

“NO! I’m never going back! You can’t make me!” Ashe grabbed her bass and ran off of the ship.

“Come on! We gotta follow her!” Luka said.

“Right!” Richard said. The band, Richard, May, and Anarka all chased after her.

Ashe found an isolated space. She sat down, took out her bass, and started strumming. She stopped and broke down crying.

Meanwhile, in Hawk Moth’s lair, Hawk Moth monologued. “Well well, a lonely soul who just wants to be free. Surely we can help this struggling artist. Fly away, my little akuma, and set her free!”

The akuma flew off and fused with Ashe’s bass. “Dark Kitty! I am Hawk Moth. Your new friends and new band are about to be taken from you? I won’t allow it! I’m giving you the power to make sure you and your band throw the best concert Paris has ever seen! The cover charge for the acquisition of this venue will be Ladybug and Cat Noir’s miraculous!”

“Yes Hawk Moth” Ashe said. The purple-black aura formed around her. The was about the time everyone else caught up with her. Once the aura faded, she now had the look of a black leather tank top with three belts on it, a black leather skirt, black stockings, black pumps, black shoulder pads with white edges that carried a black cape, and a black Kitty Section mask with a white horn and white streaks of lightning coming out of the eyes at the top.

“Ashley?” May said.

“It’s Dark Kitty now, mom!” she said. “And me an my band are about to put on the greatest concert Paris has ever seen! However, you aren’t invited. You can still see the concert, but you have to view it from the special ‘downer’ section.” She strummed her bass, aimed it at the three adults, and then transported them.

“Where’d they go?!” Luka said.

“I just told you” Dark Kitty. “Now, it’s time for us to set up!”

“Hold on! We’re not going to play like this!” Rose said.

“Yeah! We’re not your band!” Ivan said.

“What they said” Juleka echoed.

“You’re turning me away too?” Dark Kitty said. “After we had such a good time this afternoon?”

“We had a good time with Ashe! Not you!” Luka exploded.

“Pity” Dark Kitty said. “Still, I have the power. You will be there.” She strummed, aimed, and made her bandmates disappear. “Now, every good concert needs some attendees. Let’s work on that!” Dark Kitty began to prowl.

Marinette and Alya were out delivering food. “This is great” Marinette said.

“Yeah, but it would be easier if we had a car and could drive” Alya said.

Marinette bumped into Adrien. “Sorry” they said at the same time.

Alya started laughing. “I’m sorry. It’s just that moments like this make me realize that you two were always meant to be a couple.”

“Thanks?” Marinette said.

“So, what are you doing out here?” Adrien asked.

“Well, we’re helping the local food pantry by running some deliveries” Marinette explained.

“Wow” Adrien said. “If you’d have told me, I would have helped.”

“Well, it was kind of a spur of the moment thing” Alya explained. “We were trying to help Mylene out since she was feeling down.”

“I see” Adrien said. His eyes widened. “LOOK OUT!” He grabbed Marinette and ran off.

Alya was confused, but was then hit by a bass blast from Dark Kitty. “WOOOOOOOOO!” She said. She began walking off.

“That’s it!” Dark Kitty said. “Now, let’s find more concert goers!” She went off in a different direction.

Adrien and Marinette were hiding in some bushes. They nodded at each other. “Tikki! Spots on!”

“Plagg! Claws out!” They transformed and followed Dark Kitty.

At the food pantry, Mylene and Lorenzo were wrapping up for the evening. “I’ve gotta say, this has been a wonderful experience” Mylene said.

“Well, you’re welcome to come anytime” Lorenzo said. He smiled. “I had a good time too.” There was a silence. “Say, I know this might sound crazy, but would you want to go out with me?”

Mylene was shocked at the offer. She remained calm and said “Sorry. You’re a really nice guy and all. But I have a boyfriend already.”

“Oh” Lorenzo said. “Of course.” He sighed.

“It’s OK” Mylene said.

“Yeah…” Lorenzo. “It’s just, see, I had a crush on this girl but she moved away before I could do anything about it.”

“Oh no” Mylene said.

“Yeah. I’ve been in kind of a funk since” Lorenzo said. “I’ve been volunteering to get my mind off of it.”

“What a coincidence” Mylene said. “I decided to volunteer because I don’t know what I want to do with my life yet.”

“Hm. I guess we’re just two peas in a pod” Lorenzo said.

They heard some noise coming from the front of the food pantry. “What was that?” Mylene asked.

“I’ll check it out. You stay here and hide. Call the police if I don’t get back!” Lorenzo said, leaving the area. Mylene peered through the door only to see Dark Kitty putting Lorenzo under her spell. “WOOOO HOOOOO!!!!”

“Perfect! Pretty soon ALL of Paris will come to my concert!” Dark Kitty said. Mylene went back and hid. Dark Kitty saw the door flap.

She was about to investigate further when she was cut off. “Great. Another situation caused by a Kitty Section rip-off” Ladybug said.

“I’m the real deal. Dark Kitty’s the name, and I’m the latest member of Kitty Section” she said. “Everyone’s setting up at the Eiffel Tower. I’m out here rounding up a few fans!”

“Wow! A Kitty Section concert at the Eiffel Tower?! Can you Mark us down for tickets?” Cat Noir asked.

“Of course I want you two to attend, but the price of entry is going to be your miraculous!” Dark Kitty said. She fired off blasts from her bass, while Ladybug and Cat Noir dodged it. They kept dodging and moving around.

Judgement Wolf managed to sneak up on Dark Kitty and get a hit in. “Judgement Wolf!” Ladybug and Cat Noir said.

“That’s gotta Sting!” Cat Noir added

“Sorry I’m late. I had to hide to transform” he said.

“You! How lame of you to do a sneak attack like that!” Dark Kitty said. “For that, you’re going to the downer section!” She played her bass

“No!” Cat Noir said. He tried to save Judgement Wolf, but ended up getting hit and transported as well.

Judgement Wolf and Cat Noir ended up in a black box. “Well that Wentz south fast” Cat Noir said.

“OK, what are you doing?” Judgement Wolf said.

“Famous bassists” Cat Noir said.

“I see” Judgement Wolf said.

“Cat Noir! Can you get us outta here?” Anarka said.

“And please! Save my daughter! She was just Akumatized!” May said.

“Yeah, I’m sure your Cataclysm could break through this” Judgement Wolf said. He looked out the window that was there. “But maybe here is safer.”

“Why?” Cat Noir asked. He got a look out and he saw that the box was floating above the city close to the Eiffel Tower. He also got a look at the other members of Kitty Section who were just standing still, deep within a trance. “Oh. Yeah, we could escape, but Dark Kitty could just put us back here if she found us. Plus, we have you guys to worry about. Not to mention that drop. I think we need to bide our time for now. Ladybug will come through in the end.” They all nodded.

At the food pantry, Dark Kitty turned and said “Now Ladybug! It’s time for you to join them!” However, Ladybug was nowhere in sight. “Where’d she go?”

“Dark Kitty” transmitted Hawk Moth. “Don’t worry about her for now. You’re putting on a spectacle the likes of which Paris has never seen. You also have captured two of her teammates. She’ll have to come to you sooner or later.”

“Of course Hawk Moth” Dark Kitty said. She left the food pantry.

Ladybug hid in the back room and sighed once Dark Kitty left. “Ladybug?” Mylene called out.

“GAH!” Ladybug shrieked. “Oh good. I thought you were under her spell or something.”

Mylene shook her head. “Are you alright?”

“I’ll be fine” Ladybug said. “Are you OK?”

Mylene nodded. “I think so.”

“Good. I need you to stay here and keep out of sight” Ladybug said.

“I can’t just do nothing!” Mylene said. “If what she said is true, she has my boyfriend! I can’t let her get away with that.”

Ladybug sighed. “I understand how you feel. She has my boyfriend as well.”

“Cat Noir?” Mylene said.

“Yeah…” Ladybug blushed. “But the best thing for you to do right now is stay put. I have powers. You don’t. Imagine how your boyfriend would feel if you got hurt because of him.”

Mylene thought about it. “I get it.”

“Thank you” Ladybug said. “Now, let’s not go into enemy territory empty handed. Lucky Charm! A sword?”

“Wow. That’s a bit more violent than your Lucky Charm usually is” Mylene remarked.

Ladybug remembered the sword. “I’m not going to use it violently. I’ve gotta make a stop!” Ladybug left.

Marientte walked into Master Fu’s parlor to see Master Fu and Hao-yu. “Master! Hau-yu! Paris is in trouble and Cat Noir, Rena Rouge, and Judgement Wolf are incapacitated!”

“I see. Let’s fix that” Master Fu said. He opened up the miracle box. “Marinette Dupain-Cheng, pick an ally you can trust to fight alongside you on this mission. Choose wisely; such powers are meant to serve the greater good. Once the mission is over you will retrieve the Miraculous from them.”

Marinette had a look in the box. She grabbed the mouse miraculous. “If she wants something big, maybe we should fight with something small.”

“An excellent choice” Master Fu said.

“Gotta go! By Master! By Hau-yu!” Marientte left.

“Does this happen often?” Hau-yu asked.

“Well it’s been getting more frequent” Master Fu said.

Mylene was sitting around in the back of the food pantry. “I wish there was something I could do,” she said.

“And there is” Ladybug said. Mylene was surprised. “Mylene Haprele. Here is the mouse miraculous. Which grants you the power of multiplication. You will you it for the greater good. Once the job is complete, you will return the miraculous to me. Can I trust you?”

Mylene nodded. “Of course Ladybug!” She grabbed the box and opened it.

Mullo popped out. “Ah. How exciting!”

“Oh my!” Mylene said.

“Don’t worry. I’m nice!” Mullo said. She reached out her hand

Mylene smiled and shook Mullo’s hand. She put the miraculous on. “So, what do I do?”

“Just say ‘Mullo! Get Squeaky!’”

“Ok. Mullo! Get Squeaky!” Mylene transformed into a hero with a pink headband going over her hair that has Cat Noir-like mouse ears, a mostly grey skin-suit with black hands and black boots, a black belt with a pink buckle, and a grey Ninja Turtles-like mask. “Wow!”

“Now, let’s get going!” Ladybug said. The two heroes lept into action.

Dark Kitty was getting everything set up for the concert. The crowd had amassed, the lights and sound were set up,the band had these stands they were on, there was a big TV attached to the Eiffel Tower, and news crews were reporting on it. “Oh! I’m so excited!” she said.

In Hawk Moth’s Lair, he had a thought. He nodded at Nathalie and contacted Dark Kitty. “Dark Kitty. I have a favor to ask of you. Tell Judgement Wolf to meet me at the Arc de Triomphe. I want to speak with him.”

“Really? OK” Dark Kitty said. She got on her stand and told her unwilling band mates “I’ve got another errand to run, but then we can start our concert. Isn’t this exciting?!”

“Yes Dark Kitty” they all said in unison.

Dark Kitty hopped on her stand and it became a board that she could fly through the air on. She flew to the black box and said “Hey wolfy! Hawk Moth wants to meet with you at the Arc de Triomphe. So I’m letting you go. Don’t try anything funny.” She strummed her bass and Judgement Wolf fell through the floor.

Judgement Wolf found his direction and landed safely. “Huh. I wonder what this is about” he said. He made his way to the Arc.

Once he got there, he was face to face with Hawk Moth. “Hello Judgement Wolf.”

“What’s stopping me from using my power on you right now?” Judgement Wolf asked.

“Straight to the point” Hawk Moth said. “My assistant Mayura is close to the concert. She’ll create a sentimonster if you don’t cooperate. And we wouldn’t want that now, would we?”

Ladybug is already down Cat Noir and myself. Plus, from what I’ve seen, all of the other known heroes have been put under Dark Kitty’s spell. If she can even find a new hero, that’s still going to make it a bigger mess than it could be. “Fine. What do you want?” Judgement Wolf relented.

“Good boy” Hawk Moth said, condescendingly. “I was hoping you could help me. Nooroo says you could.”

“That’s odd…” Judgement Wolf said. “I thought you didn’t want to reveal yourself.”

“I don’t” Hawk Moth countered. “But Nooroo says you could help me in other ways.”

Meanwhile, Ladybug and Mylene’s hero form arrived at the Eiffel Tower. They managed to keep out of sight. “Alright, we need to think of a plan” Ladybug said. “Hey, what should I call you?”

She thought about it for a bit. “Scouries” she said.

“I see. I like it” Ladybug said. “I bet Cat Noir will too.” The two heroes giggled. “Now then. Lucky Charm! A bag of marbles?” Ladybug looked at Scouries, the intricate set-up, the black box floating in the sky, and Dark Kitty’s bass. “I bet her akuma is in the bass.”

“Are we going to make her trip and fall? Like in the cartoons?” Scouries asked.

“Not in that sense, no” Ladybug said. “But we can trip her up. Here’s the plan.”

Judgement Wolf was in the midst of his conversation with Hawk Moth. “So, you need my help with something.”

“Yes” Hawk Moth replied.

“I’m not turning my back on Ladybug” Judgement Wolf said.

“Of course. If I thought you were that kind of person, I wouldn’t need to coerce you like this” Hawk Moth said.

“You are a tricky fellow” Judgement Wolf said. “What do you want?”

“Well, there are a lot of details to get into” Hawk Moth said. “I was hoping we could plan for future meetings here.”

“I see” Judgement Wolf said. “In that case, let’s lay some ground rules. No meeting on days with akuma attacks.”

“Agreed” Hawk Moth said. “But that doesn’t mean I’m just going to give up.”

“Same” Judgement Wolf said. “Also, we should keep the meeting place consistent. I hate having to run around and get vaguely sourced invitations to meet someone.”

“Very well” Hawk Moth said. He closed his eyes. “Well, it looks like the show is about to begin. Maybe you can go and watch it for yourself.” Hawk Moth left in a hurry. Mayura fell back as well.

“Well, that was interesting” Judgement Wolf said. “Let’s see how big this concert is going to be.” Judgement Wolf left as well.

The cameras started rolling. Dark Kitty called out to everyone “Alright Paris, are you ready to party?!” The crowd cheered back. “Then let’s get started. Hit it!” The band played “I Love Unicorns.” The crowd loved it. “Thank you! Thank you!”

There was some strange clapping. Dark Kitty looked down and saw that it was Ladybug. “That was a nice opening act there. Now it’s time for the headliner” Ladybug told her.

“Ladybug. You’re just in time for the show” Dark Kitty said. She used her bass to blast at Ladybug. Ladybug dodged it and leapt up to the lights. Dark Kitty kept blasting, but Ladybug kept dodging to the rest of the band, to the tv, and to the stereos. Finally she made her way to the mixing booth. Her earrings started to beep. “Ha! You’ve already used your Lucky Charm. All I have to do is wait you out!”

“Yeah, but I wouldn’t worry about that just yet” Ladybug said. The TV went to static. The lighting fixture got detached and was hanging by a thread. The instruments began falling apart. The mic became unplugged. The TV fell off behind the band, luckily hurting no one.

“Grrrrrr. How did you do that?!” Dark Kitty demanded.

“I used my Lucky Charm, didn’t I?” Ladybug said.

Dark Kitty was still mad. “Well, seeing as you’re almost out of time, I just have to do this.” Dark Kitty aimed her bass carefully at Ladybug and strummed it.

Ladybug was teleported into the box as well. “Ladybug! They got you too?” Cat Noir said.

“Relax Kitty, this is all part of my plan” Ladybug said. She looked around. “Where’s Judgement Wolf?”

“Hawk Moth wanted to talk with him” Cat Noir said.

“I see. Well, we’ll talk about that later” Ladybug said.

“Care to Phil me in on this plan of yours?” Cat Noir said.

“Sinc we’re here, let’s free these people” Ladybug said.e

“Gotcha. Cataclysm!” Cat Noir called out.

Dark Kitty was standing there, having just dealt with Ladybug. “Now that that’s settled, let’s fix this!” She went to play her bass when she noticed little marbles sliding down the strings. “What the?” The black box exploded, and Ladybug and Cat Noir freed everyone.

Dark Kitty took her bass off to fix the problem, but she got kicked in the back by a returning Judgement Wolf. “Oops” he said. Her bass began to fall, but she went to grab the strap. However, once she got a hold of it, the strap broke off from the bass and the bass continued to fall.

“Equalize!” Scouries’s voice called out. A full-sized Scouries then appeared forming from a bunch of little Scourieses. She then used her jump rope to attack and subdue Dark Kitty.

“Nice” Judgement Wolf said.

“Thank you” Scouries said.

Ladybug and Cat Noir came back from rescuing everyone. “Where are they? Lemmy attem!” Cat Noir said.

“Relax” Scouries said. “It’s almost over.”

The bass crashed to the ground and broke, freeing the akuma. “Thanks” Ladybug said. “No more evildoing for you, little akuma. TIme to deevilize! Gotcha. Bye bye, little butterfly. Miraculous Ladybug!” She threw the bag of marbles in the air. The ladybug fixed all of the damage caused by Dark Kitty.

Ashe appeared out of the purple-black aura with her bass. “What happened?”

“Pound it!” the heroes said.

“So, I’ve been defeated once again” Hawk Moth said. I might be low now, but I do have a bass-line for my plans for the future!”

Ladybug, Cat Noir, and Scouries’s miraculous began to beep. “We should go. Are you OK by yourself?”

“Yeah. I think so” Ashe said.

Ladybug nodded. “Bug out!” The four heroes left.

Once they were hidden, Scouries asked “I know you know, and I know Judgement Wolf has to know, but why is Cat Noir here?”

“Well, we’ve resolved to be more open about our plans for dealing with Hawk Moth” Ladybug said.

“I can leave if you don’t want me to know” Cat Noir said.

“No. It’s fine” Scouries said. “Mullo! Un-Squeak!” She transformed back into Mylene. Cat Noir and Judgement Wolf raised their eyebrows.

“Good luck on Mr. Wolf’s test” Mullo said.

“Thanks” Mylene replied. She gave back the miraculous. “Well, I should get going.”

“Wait! How did you do all of that?” Cat Noir asked.

“Oh. Well, I activated my power, which caused a bunch of little clones of me to appear. I then hid in Ladybug’s hair as she took me around to various places. While she was distracting Dark Kitty, I was doing whatever I could to mess up the concert. Once Dark Kitty aimed her bass at Ladybug, I jumped off of Ladybug with the marbles she summoned and onto the bass to mess with that.”

“I see. How clever” Judgement Wolf said.

“Well, you know what they say. Les is more” Cat Noir said. Ladybug rolled her eyes.

“I really should get back to the food pantry” Mylene said. “Seeya!” She ran off.

Ladybug and Cat Noir ran out of time and detransformed. “Well, speaking of being more open” Marinette said.”What were you doing with Hawk Moth?”

Judgment Wolf looked at them and said, “He wanted to speak with me. I think he wants help.”

“You’re not going to give it to him, are you?” Adrien asked.

“It depends on the type of help he wants” Judgement Wolf said. “He didn’t seem to have an interest in using me. However, I suspect that there may be more to this than expected.”

“Well, I trust you” Marinette said. “Just keep us informed.”

“Will do” Judgement Wolf said. He left.

Marinette grabbed Adrin’s arm. “Come on. Let’s return this together.”

“RIght” Adrien nodded. The two walked over to Master Fu’s.

Ashe came out of the Eiffel Tower. “Ashley!” May called out. Ashe looked up and saw her mom, Luka and Juleka’s parents, and the band sans Ivan. May came up to Ashe and gave her a hug. “It’s OK.”

Ashe hugged back. “Thanks mom.”

The hug ended. “Tell you what. It’s pretty late. Why don’t you spend the night with me and Richard and I’ll talk with your father and see what we can do.”

“Thanks” Ashe said. She looked at Kitty Section. “If it’s alright with you, and if I’m allowed to stay, I would still like to be a part of the band. But I understand if you wouldn’t want that?”

“Are you KIDDING?!” Rose said. “We’d love to have someone like you.”

“Yeah. You kind of cool” Juleka said. “A little troubled, but we all are.”

“Besides, you’re practically like our step-sister” Luka said. “How could we say no to family?”

Ashe hugged Luka. “Thanks!” Rose and Juleka got in on the hug. “Where’s Ivan?”

“He said he had some business to take care of” Luka said.

Lorenzo entered the food pantry. “Mylene! It’s safe to come out now!”

Mylene walked out texting someone. “Oh, hi Lorenzo” Mylene said.

“Mylene! Thank goodness you’re alright!” Lorenzo said, hugging her. He broke the hug soon after. “Are you OK?”

“Yeah. I just hid here until the whole thing blew over” Mylene said.

“MYLENE!” Ivan said, entering. He saw her across the room. He ran up and hugged her. “Are you alright?”

“I’m fine Ivan” Mylene said. “But thanks for asking. Lorenzo, this is my boyfriend.”

“I see” Lorenzo said. “You have a great girlfriend.”

“Thanks?” Ivan said.

“So, where do you go to school?” Mylene asked.

“Well, I just moved here last week. Starting tomorrow, I’m transferring to Francois Dupont High School” Lorenzo said.

“Really?! That’s where we go to school” Ivan said.

“Really? Well, then I guess I’ll see you around then” Lorenzo said. He walked out.

“What was that about?” Ivan asked.

“He’s just been having a hard time recently” Mylene said.

“Well, maybe we should help him,” Ivan said.

“I like that idea” Mylene replied. The two shared a kiss.

#miraculous ladybug #miraculous ladybug fanfic #Marinette #Adrien #Alya #Vlad #Mylene #Ivan #Luka #Juleka #Rose #Anarka #Gabriel #Nathalie #Mullo

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