#I want keenry to win | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

demetriandelibinaryboyfriends · 2 years

Text

Season 4, Episode 8: An Extremely Chaotic and Incoherent Review

EEEEUUUUGGGGGHHHHHH this was by FAR my least favorite episode so don't expect me to have many kind things to say about it D:<

The Good (what little there was of it):

Robby and Tory were like...the ONLY redeeming quality of this episode

They fucken CARRIED the damn thing, honestly--I don't know if I could have stomached it without them

"Did you just ask me to prom?" "Strictly a tactical move" Okay only Tory and Robby would flirt like this and god is it ADORABLE

While I am cranky that they wasted screen time bringing back Stingray of all people, "You were never a part of this team. You're a buffoon. A joker. An embarrassment." is my new go-to insult and I will now be using it regularly

Lol somehow I forgot that Daniel has other New Jersey cousins who can cause shenanigans. I am always eager for shenanigans

Sam's prom dress is almost the exact shade of pink mine was and thus I am obligated to compliment her fashion sense and color preferences

Also CALLED that her dress would be pink or purple!!! And does she ever SLAY in pink, go get it girl <3

AWWWWW I JUST NOW REALIZED MIGUEL MATCHED HIS BOWTIE WITH HER DRESS

DORKS

Okay I know everything's gonna go to shit later but I'm happy these two get a few minutes of cuteness at least ;__;

Damn...the fact that Shannon was able to pick out red flags with Terry Silver immediately is making her grow on me. Like she's definitely not been the best mom, but the woman has good instincts and I have to respect that. "If there's one type of guy I know, it's a rich guy who wants something" indeed

Shannon might be smarter than I've been giving her credit for honestly

Miguel picking up Sam and spinning her ;_;

GODDDDD why can't they be happy for ONE NIGHT

Moon dancing with GIRLS like the sapphic queen she is!!!!

GOD if only one of them was her new girlfriend and she was off the market to one Eli Moskowitz ;___;

Man why won't they let that relationship DIE ffs

Okay okay back to good things, sorry

You know, I can take solace in the fact that Eli and Demetri did in fact go to prom as each other's date and are just too inconceivably stupid and far back in the closet to realize it

Idiots (affectionate, but frustrated)

Also, Demetri's prom suit is just as delightfully hideous as I've always dreamed it would be, and I am thrilled about that

Additionally, no straight man could ever wear a pac man suit to prom and manage to actually pull it off, hence proving further that Demetri is gay as all hell and just in very deep denial about it

AW, Dem tryna cheer up Eli when Eli’s bitch ass doesn't appreciate his very handsome and sarcastic date just because Dem's not a girl ;__;

At least Demetri looks apologetic when he gets dragged off by Yasmine??? That's something???

Eli's tryna be happy for Dem even though his heart is breaking in a million pieces, god bless

Okay not Yasmine seeming more excited to see Moon than Demetri, who she supposedly flew in from Sydney for

NO SERIOUSLY it's like:

Yasmine, upon seeing Demetri: Ah hey :) What's up, you :) Yasmine, upon seeing Moon: *excited sapphic screeching*

Also not Moon breaking into a huge smile and letting out this elated little "I can't believe you're here! <3 <3 <3" and then breaking into lovesick giggles

And, what? You think I'm NOT going to ship them??? Eat my ENTIRE ass actually

Okay, you know what??? MAD respect for Tory and Robby walking in in an ABSOLUTE power stance

Saw some people throwing shade at Tory's dress, but those people are wrong and leopard print fucks actually

Okay I mean I do appreciate Johnny trying to protect his kid from Terry Sleazer but like...Johnny you IDIOT, this absolutely has the vibes of him taking you to a secluded place to murder you??? Then again, it's very in-character for Johnny to just go anyway

Johnny Lawrence is only the most tragic of idiots

Aw, the WAY Sam looks at Miguel when they start slow dancing

She's so happy ;__;

I'll admit they DO have a few pretty great moments in this episode

Oh my GOD Tory and Robby are so fucking petty and EXTRA and it's absolutely glorious

Look at them, carrying this entire fucking episode on their backs

I can't believe they're just the actual embodiment of the Fake Dating fanfiction trope

Like they legit said "let's go to prom together to piss off our exes and make them jealous" and then actually started liking each other??? Classic fanfic move

Yeah okay the Anthony subplot is mildly amusing, I forget how sassy and hot-tempered Amanda can be

Love that for her though!

"Now why do you think you love your daughter more than your son?" GODDAMN YOU DIDN'T HAVE TO JUST OUTRIGHT CALL THEM OUT LIKE THAT

Okay she got them good with that notepad, I'll give it to her

Shannon was a dancer??? And she taught Robby??? THAT'S SO FRICKEN CUTE

TORY AND ROBBY MY GODDDDDD

THEY CAME FOR MY ENTIRE HEART ACTUALLY

I feel like they just really understand each other and can find a comfort and solace in each other they haven't been able to with anyone else and I think that's beautiful ;__;

AAAAHHHHHH HER HEAD'S ON HIS SHOULDER

She's showing him Soft Tory, where she doesn't feel like she has to be tough and badass ;_;

Pretty sure she was NEVER that vulnerable with Miguel so like

Keenry >>>>> Tori/guel actually

"Are they still watching?" "I don't care" *sobs*

I'll give it to you, Season 4, you got me very emotionally invested in the two dudes who were my least faves last season...that's impressive

ALSO if you look in the background during the Tory and Robby dance scenes, Moon is hanging around RIGHT BY Yas and Demetri the entire time

And I swear to GOD, I caught Moon turning and stealing a couple glances at Yas

Moon has a big fat lesbian crush on Miss Discount Regina George, send tweet

I’m betting she was hanging around Dem and Yas because she was trying to work up the courage to ask if she could “jokingly” cut in, but never could quite be brave enough :( :( :(

No I don’t CARE if I’m reaching actually, this headcanon is giving me a seratonin boost and that’s all that matters

There’s even a super brief shot of Yas and Moon dancing together, so fuck it, I’ll take my lesbian scraps

Aight that's a sick LA-city-lights-at-night shot, I'll give it to 'em

Y'know what? I predicted Eli would be third-wheeling Demetri and Yasmine and NOT Sam and Miguel, so like...I guess I won there???

He's clearly hanging around Dem like a lost puppy, so...at least we got one half of the ship being gay af

As much as you can fuckin win anything when you're getting Yasfuckingmetri shoved down your throat -__-

Alright alright alright I'll admit Stingray beating the shit out of the neighbor who’s got a stick up his ass was pretty damn funny

I GUESS he can get one last moment of glory before Terry Silver pummels him to kingdom come

I'll admit I kinda loved seeing Daniel take a page out of Johnny's book and cut the shit with Anthony, cuz like...I honestly don't think there'd be much other way to get through to him, the way he just...does whatever he wants lol

Also Daniel shouting Johnny's "QUIET!!!" was beautiful

Breaking the iPad was taking it a liiiiiittle far though

"Seems like you're always behind me in line. First Miguel, now Robby. I have a half-eaten cupcake in there if you want some!" DAMN GIRL YOU ARE A SAVAGE

I honestly have to stan, that was a sick burn

Okay, you know what? I was hoping for a karate brawl at the prom because teenagers fighting each other in formalwear is deeply hilarious to me. And this episode DELIVERED on that front. Granted, I was hoping for a larger karate fight that included Demetri and Eli pummeling the crap out of Kyler, but I'll take any prom karate fight.

And like...given Sam’s trauma with Tory and Johnny’s recent influence on her, I’m not really surprised she started shit and tried her luck with “striking first”

Like yes it led to a clusterfuck disaster but it was a neat character beat

TORY PULLING ROBBY INTO THE POOL

THEM GIGGLING

WHY ARE THEY SO ADORABLE

On the upside, I don't think my most beloathed Tori/guel and S*mR*bby are going to be getting back together anytime soon, because Tory and Robby are in fact very into each other

Giving me legitimate hope that Samiguel and Keenry will be endgame because like...I don't think Robby and Tory are going to suddenly stop being utterly smitten with each other any time soon

Look at you smooching kids!!! Happy for you!!!

I would like to personally thank Robby Keene and Tory Nichols for singlehandedly getting me through this episode

Welp, I mean. They couldn't bring back Stingray without having him get his ass handed to him by an unhinged karate grandpa, so like...I guess that's something.

The Bad:

Okay WHY did we need to bring Stingray back? Like

We're all here for the kids and the karate dads and the evil karate grandpas

And we spent a good precious 3 minutes of screentime on Stingray stuff that I don't think anyone cares about

Literally the ONE good thing about bringing the man back is that we got "You were never a part of this team. You're a buffoon. A joker. An embarrassment." but that's IT

They could've used that screentime to actually like. Develop Demetri and Yasmine's relationship a tiny bit so that we actually give half a shit when she flies back to go to the prom with him like???

Maybe have a Yasmine scene where she's in the Sydney airport feeling conflicted, texting Dem or smth. It could be an opportunity to learn more about Yas and develop her a bit outside of just being really obsessed with Demetri or whatever

Like no, this wouldn't make me ship them, but at least it would help Yasmine feel like less of a fucking prop and more of an actual like...person

Right now she's literally just a "coolness prize" and I have 0 emotional investment in her and Demetri's relationship

I also know basically fucking nothing about it, considering we went from her making out with him in the halls and being super embarrassed about it to her being all over him and having no personality outside of it

Like, what, is it supposed to be a triumphant moment when she pops up at prom??? We still barely know her and, again, have basically no reason to be invested in her character OR her and Demetri's relationship

Unless you like looking at hot girls and projecting onto Demetri I guess

Anyways

Bottom line is if the writers actually want me to root for Dem and Yas, the BARE MINIMUM is to give Yas some depth and some personality aside from "horny and occasionally mean"

Also it's real Daniel-and-Johnny-get-the-hell-over-yourselves hours

Maybe have one (1) reasonable, mature discussion instead of jumping at every opportunity to yell at and belittle each other and you wouldn't have so many issues get between your goddamn dojos

These stubborn fuckers are legit so wrapped up in their own self-righteousness that I am starting to very much want to slap them

WHY CAN'T Y'ALL JUST CHILL AND FIGURE YOUR SHIT OUT

Okay random little nitpick BUT

I'm so sorry but the little bows on Sam's straps look kind of tacky, don't kill me ^^;

Lowkey distracting D:

Other than that I like the dress tho!!!

Okay SO

MONSTER rant ahead

Literally as soon as we get to the prom everyone starts acting OOC as SHIT, it's insane

Like I shit you not, basically the only ones who aren't acting like they've been replaced by cheap imitation dopplegangers are Robby and Tory

Hence why, as previously stated, those two fuckers carried the entire episode

So for starters the No Homo'ing here is somehow even more atrocious than in Episode 5

And that was BAD

But like yeah of COURSE they have Eli complaining about him and Dem not having prom dates just to make SURE we know they're not each other's prom date -__-

Because god forbid we think they might be on a date for one goddamn second

And also every heterosexual in existence clearly spends every waking moment lamenting the lack of a romantic partner, and can never just...vibe with their friends at dances???

Like Demetri goes "dateless" to prom SOLELY with the intent of hanging out with Eli so he won't be alone, and then the writers make Eli not only appreciate it 0%, but also actively bitch about not having a girl on his arm???

Fuck OFF

It just feels so OOC, too, like...yeah, going to prom without an official date can make you self-conscious, but like...at this point in Eli's arc, I feel like he should kinda be over the need to get a gf for social status, you know?

And let's be real, high school dating (and prom dates in particular) is like 90% about social status

Like it would be one thing if the need to be in a relationship or be desired by girls was something that Eli still has to kind of overcome, but I don't get the sense that's where they're going with this??? It's just like "haha let's make the heavily queer-coded dude SUPER focused on girls so no one will ever suspect he's queer-coded!!!"

I SWEAR TO GOD

Also they deadass flew Yasmine all the way back from Australia solely to No Homo Demetri and Eli once again -___-

Like??? What was even the point of the "Yasmine goes to Australia" plotline???

Seems like they were trying to introduce conflict in Demetri's love life or something, but then they just solved it immediately

"Oh no, Demetri's girlfriend can't go to the prom with him!!!! Jk yeah she can"

Okay??? This made me feel absolutely nothing

Once again obsessed (derogatory) with the fact that the writers cannot ever let Demetri and Eli have ONE scene alone together without insistently sticking in a reminder that they're both straight

Like if they were actually just chillin straight bros you wouldn't need to TELL us they're just chillin straight bros all the time???

Correct me if I'm wrong, but I'm pretty sure they don't do this kind of thing with like...Demetri and Miguel. Or Demetri and Chris. Because in those cases, the writers trust us to interpret their bond as purely platonic

But with Dem and Eli??? The showrunners know DAMN WELL how gay they come across, and they gotta constantly try and do "damage control" over it -__-

When will Yasmine's personality return from the war??? More at six

I'm still so upset that she went from being horrified that anyone would think she was dating Demetri to being all the fuck over him, and it happened entirely offscreen

What on earth happened to change her mind about openly dating him??? Guess we'll never fucking know

I can't believe I deadass said "maybe Yasmine and Demetri dating won't be so bad"

I really trusted the writers to portray it as the shallow fling it was set up as instead of like...the high school sweetheart romance of the century I guess

What--and I once again cannot emphasize this enough--the FUCK

Guess I am BooBoo the Fool

Here I thought these ultimately empty, shallow high school relationships would actually be shown as being

You know

Ultimately empty and shallow

Cobra Kai really tryna tell us "if you and someone in your high school find one another attractive and kiss a few times, y'all are absolute soulmates and you have found true love"

EXCUSE ME, you're telling me the SAME Demetri who put his arm around a shaved, sadboi Eli and told him he didn't care how he did his hair or what he went by or whether he was into coding or karate, he would always love him and be his best friend--

You're telling me THAT Demetri ditched Eli at the prom to go grind on his one-dimensional girlfriend, and didn't even invite Eli to go dancing with them???

Who the hell is this pac man-wearing fuck and what has he done with my boy??? This is character assassination of the highest caliber

Are you fucking SERIOUS??? They're having Eli still be hung up over Moon??? Bro you dated her for like 2 minutes, and we're literally never given any reason to think it was because of something other than just her being hot and popular. And now it's been, what? Like a year???

The writers will not let Eli move the hell on, despite the fact that Moon clearly has, and it pisses me off so much. Eli needs to let Moon go, and the narrative really should not reward him for being hell-bent on rekindling a romance that seemed to be based on literally nothing except physical attraction anyways

See but I KNOW it's going to and that angers me on a deep and profound level

Like my dude high school relationships end all the TIME and that's FINE! Teenagers are just getting used to an onslaught of hormones and experimenting with romantic relationships, and people in high school are constantly growing and changing so much that it's difficult to really build a lasting romantic relationship. When hormones and attraction are that intense, it's not uncommon at all for there to be a very strong spark for a little bit and then it completely burns out. With Hawk and Moon, we were never shown any deeper connection between them to build a lasting relationship off of. The fact that we're just supposed to take the writer's word for it that it was a deep and profound relationship with these puberty-riddled high schoolers is just ridiculous.

On that note, Eli thinking his first high school girlfriend is his soulmate or smth is also ridiculous. Although Eli is chaotic, intensely emotional, and sometimes kind of impulsive, we're shown he's overall an intelligent dude--he should really be smarter than this :/

Also ALSO in Episode 5, he showed basically NO signs of still being into Moon (aside from "oh when did she and Piper break up?"). Like he literally was completely focused on Demetri and Yasmine until Moon talked to him directly! And when Dem asked him about it, he seemed to have accepted the fact that Moon had a girlfriend and was legitimately ready to move on.

And now all the sudden he's being a piney sadboi for her again??? Because...she's available, and he's not allowed to move on for some reason??? Fuck OFF

I'm telling you, character assassination all AROUND in this episode

"We have to show Eli continuing to be obsessed with his first girlfriend instead of defining himself outside having a gf and trying to heal the friendships he drove a stake into last season, which are really more important to his overall character arc"

Like what a weird and vaguely gross writing choice

Moon really deserves better than to be endlessly pined for by a clingy ex who just will not let sleeping dogs lie I guess

Like I don't think I need to say it but your ex from a two-month relationship still being hung up on you like a year later proooooobably shouldn't be portrayed as a good thing. Or romantic. Or flattering in really any way. Especially when you've shown literally 0 signs of having any lingering feelings for him at all.

Sorry if I'm repeating myself, I'm just really angry about fucking H*wkM**n being pushed on us in such an insanely poorly-done way

I mean I wouldn't like it being pushed on us regardless but the way they do it is especially Cringe

Anyways I'm being reminded that as much as I've come to despise Yas/metri, I'll always despise H*wkM**n more

At LEAST Yasmine and Demetri had wedgies to bond over

WHAT do Hawk and Moon have in common?

The answer is ??????????????????????????????????????????

ANYWAYS

I guess eventually I'll have to stop ranting about this and start ranting about everything else I hated in this episode

So remember how I said everyone is acting egregiously OOC this episode??? I sure as hell didn't just mean my boys Demetri and Eli

Do not even get me STARTED on Miguel

Actually no, I WILL get started on Miguel, whether you like it or not

So Tory and Robby walk in and Sam and Miguel are Big Mad, right

Understandable, have a nice day. BUT

Both Sam and Miguel have heavy trauma centered around Tory and Robby. Robby paralyzed and nearly killed Miguel, and Tory severely assaulted Sam with seemingly-murderous intent twice

Naturally you would think one or both of them would have, perhaps, a goddamn panic attack--or at LEAST want to get as far away from their former aggressors as possible, instead of just standing around and shooting glares at them

With Miguel it's especially egregious because like. Your girlfriend showed you the scars she got from Tory in the hospital, and you know she's been badly hurt by this girl. And you can't be bothered to check up on her and make sure she's okay when she starts acting tense, upset, and anxious around her former attacker???

It's outrageous, like...Miguel has been shown to care SO MUCH for Sam, and to an extent he's never had eyes for anyone but her (if you consider Tory a rebound, which...she kinda was tbh). Why the hell isn't he more worried about her assaulter being nearby???

Like the Miguel Diaz I know would have pulled Sam aside like "Hey, are you okay with them being here? If you're uncomfortable we can go home and watch octopus documentaries"

Or at the very least I feel he would have opted to, you know, not DANCE RIGHT NEXT TO THESE PEOPLE WHO TRAUMATIZED HIM AND HIS GF

Like why even??? Just go to the other side of the dance floor, where you don't have to worry as much about like...getting severe PTSD flashbacks

On that topic, literally WHY is Miguel suddenly still into Tory??? He has not been shown to have ANY lingering feelings for her like ALL SEASON

Also this is still the chick who assaulted his current gf, who he has always, sorry to say it, liked better than Tory anyhow

As if he'd EVER pine for Tory when he's with the girl he's liked from DAY FUCKING ONE

I buy these lingering Tory feelings 0% actually

Also bro WHY is Miguel annoyed at Sam for shooting glances at Robby and Tory, like??? Again, this was the girl who BRUTALLY ASSAULTED HER together with Sam’s possibly vindictive ex, of COURSE she's tense and wants to keep an eye on them

To make sure, you know, SHE AND MIGUEL DON'T GET ATTACKED

Which, given these four's history, is not completely out of the question, dojo "truces" aside

Bottom line is Miguel is highkey being a dick and uncharacteristically unconcerned about his girlfriend's legitimate PTSD, and this is NOT the Miguel Diaz I know and love

"I guess Moon's not coming" "I'm sorry, did you say something?" Yo, where are the Cobra Kai writers at? I swear, I just wanna talk

As if Demetri WOULDN'T be checking in on Eli constantly. Ffs that's just what Demetri DOES.

Like Demetri went to the prom solely to keep Eli company, as established before, and now he suddenly doesn't give a shit about sidelining Eli and making him feel super awkward???

And of COURSE the showrunners can't pass up an opportunity to remind us that Eli is totally straight and still obsessing over the ex he had no chemistry whatsoever with -___-

This H*wkM**n shit is gonna make me do a homicide I swear

ARE YOU SERIOUS ARE YOU FUCKING SERIOUS DEMETRI IS LEAVING ELI ALL ALONE ON THE DAMN COUCH TO RUN AROUND THE HOUSE WITH YASMINE??? THEY'RE BOTH JUST FUCKING OPENLY DITCHING HIM???

No way this fucker is really my boy Demetri, they've replaced him with an awful, awful clone

The REAL Demetri and Eli decided not to go to prom and are at Eli's house playing video games this entire episode actually

Because LOOK WHAT THEY DID TO MY BOYS

WHERE is management, I am going to throw some hands

Can I throw this entire episode into an incinerator

Except for Robby and Tory, y'all are angels and you can stay

Aight so while I do appreciate Daniel giving Anthony the harsh call-out he deserves, like I said before, breaking the iPad was a LITTLE much

Seems not great to scare your kids into compliance but okay

"You think I broke your heart? You broke mine too" girl what

Sam has literally never been shown to still have feelings for Robby since the breaking-Miguel's-back incident, what the FUCK

Damn, this is really the "try to convince everyone Sam and Miguel still have feelings for their exes and utterly fail at it" episode huh

Like even when Sam talked to Robby at the skate park, she entirely seemed to miss his friendship???

I want to emphasize once again that this is the first we've seen or heard ALL SEASON of Sam and Miguel still carrying ANY kind of torch for Robby and Tory

Even for a silly karate soap opera this shit is just insanely whack

"Tonight was supposed to be for you and me and you ruined it" BRUH

Like your girlfriend is understandably on edge because her previous assaulter shows up, you show 0 concern or empathy about this, and then you get all up her ass for doing exactly what both y'all's mentor has always taught you about striking first and not taking shit???

I mean yes, starting shit with Tory was not the wisest thing to do, but given Sam's trauma and constant concern about Tory coming after her, it's absolutely understandable

Sam lost her temper and lashed out, yes, but it's worth noting that from her perspective she was preemptively striking to get the upper hand in the case that Tory tried to attack her

Which, given Tory's 2 cases of assault against her, isn't a terribly unreasonable assumption--promise to Amanda not to attack Sam or no

Anyways so like...now Miguel is getting mad at SAM and accusing her of RUINING THE NIGHT because she was understandably upset and uncomfortable with her, you know, ASSAULTER being nearby???

Fuck OFF

It's Peak Douche and the most egregiously OOC shit I've ever seen

Like suddenly he doesn't care about Sam's trauma or try to factor it in when she's behaving out of sorts??? Eat my ENTIRE ass

NOT MY BOY

Where the hell is the real Miguel Diaz??? Did someone kidnap him??? Is he playing video games with the real Demetri and Eli???

Sam was more in character than Miguel for sure BUT

She should be much more pissed at Robby for, you know, BREAKING HER BOYFRIEND'S BACK and then looking like he might attack said boyfriend again???

Like it's a little more in-character for Sam to get wrapped up in her rage enough that she doesn't stop to think about how Robby's presence could be affecting Miguel

But she still should have checked in with him somewhat

They BOTH should have checked in with each other when the people who traumatized them walked in, wtf

Like how do you butcher Samiguel so bad in what should probably be the most romantic episode

"You're doing just fine. I love you." "I love you too, Robby" EXCUSE ME

You have the audacity to come here, on the DAY of my Samiguel character butchering, and butcher Johnny Lawrence's character too???

I'm going to light something on fire

Look I hate to be That Guy but lowkey Johnny has been shown to love Miguel more than Robby

Like I don't think either Miguel or Johnny are really in the wrong for that, because like...you can't help that you're just going to form deeper connections and vibe more with some people than others, y'know? And you can't fully help who you love, and how much you love them

Like it's nice that Johnny wants to reconcile with Robby but like

I just CAN'T see him choosing Robby over Miguel tbh

Nor can I see Robby being more on his mind than Miguel while he's in a drunken stupor :/

Damn, first Demetri and Eli, then Sam and Miguel, now Johnny and Miguel...is this episode TRYING to do every single relationship in this show that I like dirty????

And now they're making me watch Miguel cry and ripping my heart in half, as if I wasn't already upset ENOUGH god damn it

In summary AYVKUZDTGWCIYKTDETKCTW (derogatory)

Why

WHY

This episode burned not just my house down but my entire neighborhood down

Look what you've done, Cobra Kai, now I'm homeless

Hol up I need to lie on my couch and cry (derogatory) for a while

Someone PLEASE give me the strength to get through the last two episodes, I'm going to need it :/

70 notes · View notes