#I will never not laugh at referring to someone who I’ve been parasocial about for going on ten years as ‘Laios VA’

[catgrandpa]

Someone has to draw Laios as his VA in this fit please for the love of everything

[croptopscout]

I feel really stupid about this, but I don’t feel comfortable talking to anyone irl about it so here’s a vent lol

please check tws in the tags if you wanna read this for some reason

I’ve never lost someone like this. Which is pretty silly, considering I’ve had actual family members pass away and now I’m griving a man I didn’t even know. But. All the family members I’ve lost have been very old people who have been sick for as long as I remember, and not a single one was someone I was close with. None of them were people that could bring me comfort when I’m sad or I could depend on to make me laugh. They were basically strangers who I knew shared my blood. This time, I’m also griving a stranger. But this stranger managed to make me so happy so many times. I didn’t even watch his solo content that often, but I knew that when I did, or when I saw him in someone else’s content he always made me laugh. I fucking loved his sense of humor (at least, the sense of humor he allowed us to see) and his stupid greek mythology references that were actually super fucking fitting and shocked me every time because how did I not make that conextion??? 

 I remeber when he first told us about the cancer, and I was concerned, of course I was, no one wants someone they care about (even if it’s a parasocial thing) to be sick, but I didn’t for a minute consider the possibility that he wouldn’t be okay. It just was absolutely ridiculous in my head, that that could happen to him. I don’t think we ever fully believe this kinda stuff is gonna happen to people we care about until it does.

It still doesn’t feel real. 

If his death is affecting this many people who were just fans of his content, I can’t imagine how hard it must be rn for his family and friends. 

I can’t help but be grateful for past me, who watched the Jailbreak stream live months ago, even though at that point I had no idea what was happening on the lore, hadn’t been watching streams, and haven’t watched any lore streams since. I think I’d be regreting it now if I hadn’t.

I’m glad that was my last memory of the dsmp. I’m glad we have so many videos and vods to look back on, when we want to hear his voice, even if I want to cry every time I remeber we’ll never hear it again.

I can’t remember they’re @, but someone on twt mentioned how we’re lucky, because we got to live at the same time as Techno. I definitely feel lucky, for having being able to have been a fan while he was still making content, even if just for a few months. He touched the lives of so many people, and I’m so grateful to have been one of them. Rest in peace king, your memory is gonna live on.

PS: to end on a less depressing note, remeber that Techno is probably laughing his ass off in the afterlife (if it exists) watching us being all sad about this, and buy his merch!!!!!

[mariaiscrafting]

Okay I recently listened to sci guys podcast episode about parasocial relationships and even though I don't agree with the tier part because I feel like the divide between the tiers are confusing and incorrect, it really changed how I view parasocial relationships.

The podcast brings up that everyone has a parasocial relationship with someone for example when a lot of people gets sad that a celebrity died, that's a parasocial relationship. But there are different levels to it. For example one of the tiers of they bring up is giving a person money or the person being able to profit from the parasocial relationship between them and their fans. Which is what youtubers, twitch streamers and a lot of other entertainers careers are built upon!

But that has just made me examine more how the parasocial relationships I have formed shape how I feel and interact with certain things. And I'm learning new things every day even tho I have been in another fandom for a few years now that also have a problem with parasocial relationships both in the mainstream fandom and tumblr fandom.

Like how much I love the Tommy is jealous bit just because it's so clearly a bit. Just the way they use their twitter accounts to create bits that are kind of like in jokes with fans. It's like when Tommy went to the happy hour podcast and I looked through the youtube comments and a lot of people who have never watched his content before was enterained by him and at the same time dedicated fans were pointing out references in his answers. Which I find so impressive.

But what Ranboo said on an origin smp stream this last week(?) when he talked about the uk trip and his feelings about a face reveal was really interesting. Because he kind of finished it with that we shouldn't worry about it because there is nothing any of us fans can do about it. It's up to him to come up with a solution. And that really hit me because that's a part of the parasocial relationship I didn't really grasp that I had until now. And maybe it is me who is slow on the uptake but experiencing these negative emotions are natural because Ranboo has made many of my days brighter, and as a result I wish for him to experience the same happiness. But in the end they are futile and these are emotions are just for me to hold in my hands and experience. I don't know, I know I'm rambling a lot but this really made me able to not cling to that worry?

This became a ramble and I'm not sure how coherent this is but I just find it very interesting to examine and talk about it. Anyway stan Philza Minecraft

Yes, I agree, stan Philza Minecraft.

But besides that, first, wanna apologize for not answering this for two days ack, it’s such a lovely ask, and I appreciate it sm.

So, I kinda agree with that sciguy view of parasocial relationships. I don’t think it’s very effective or useful or even necessary to create fixed tiers to which all fans can be assigned, but I do think it’s useful that we each examine our own parasocial relationships with individual public figures. Like, do I think the parasocial relationship between an individual and the royal British family that spurred them to send me asks about how gross and horrible Prince Phillip was, is particularly dangerous? Not really. Do I think the parasocial relationship between an individual and a CC that spurs them to send me an ask about how much they love that CC is particularly dangerous? It depends, and I think it’s worth the time and effort to pause and examine that.

I totally get the feeling worry on behalf of a streamer, and I’m sure most of us do. But there’s a line that needs to be drawn where we need to become aware that we can’t let ourselves completely empathize with what is essentially a public figure. That sounds harsh, but it’s true. Like, if your friend or partner or family member is stressed out, you feel the inherent yearn to help and/or comfort them, right? That’s because those relationships are founded upon love and care that is mutual, and you know those people on such a level that allows for that empathy to manifest in such a way where it isn’t toxic and one-sided. In real life, if we do have, for example, a partner who doesn’t afford us that same amount of care or empathy, we tell others to break up with them because this is toxic and harmful for the individual’s mental health. The same should go for CCs. If we find ourselves stressing out on their behalf, getting angry on their behalf, etc., we’ve taken it a step too far, and we need to do what you did: pause and learn how to stop clinging to that worry. That’s because a CC does not know us, and they can care about us in a tangential sense, but never on an individual level. So we can’t put ourselves in the position to be taken advantage of because we’re putting out an unequal amount of emotion.

I think a lot of this fandom could benefit from really internalizing the reality of how much CCs care about fans and the capacity to which they even can care about their fans, and trying to emulate that amount of emotion. Once I stopped and realized “hey, Technoblade might laugh at his chat and find his donos endearing and talk to us, but he doesn’t actually know me, and I don’t particularly know him, either,” it became a lot easier to stop getting anxious on his behalf, angry on behalf, or even be nearly as obsessed as I previously was with him. It’s not that I don’t care anymore, and I clearly still let discourse surrounding him and his actions and words affect me on some level - whether they be to entertain, sadden, spark joy, etc. - but I’ve greatly decreased my emotional dependency upon this single individual who I barely even know.