#I've been... basically working only on big bang event stuff

[raven-cl]

Oughhh wip of something

[momotarotea]

Sonic Big Bang 2024!

So part of why I've been quiet recently is that I've been working on my contribution for the @sthbigbang event!

Of course, I had to write a Shadamy fic. I also did an illustration for my fic, as did the immensely talented @waywardvessel

@sofibeth-arts

and @morefluid-thanwater!

Working with you three was a pleasure, and I hope you all enjoy the finished piece!

If you'd rather read this on AO3, here's the link!

Without further adieu, I hope you all enjoy ARK Angel :)

Summary: Life is a series of decisions, but what if one had gone differently? What if Amy’s pleas to Shadow on the ARK had fallen on deaf ears, and he hadn’t agreed to save the world? The only thing left to do would be to fight to save the world herself, wouldn’t it?

Discovering Shadow in an abandoned lab hadn’t been on Amy’s to-do list that day, but neither had heading into space, watching Sonic almost die, or anything else from the events of that day. With the Space Colony now plummeting headfirst towards the Earth, it seemed that she would be adding ‘begging Shadow to save the human race’ to her impromptu list of tasks, too.

She’d stopped in the corridor to give herself a pep talk when she’d spotted him - fear having gripped her momentarily at the sight of the pitch-furred hedgehog. After a deep inhale to steel herself, she darted over to him at the window, a fire in her stomach and determination on her face. Every step made her feel like her heart was going to beat out of her chest. He’d been nothing but trouble for her friends up to this point, and whether it had been intentional or not, she couldn’t help but hold it against him. He’d framed Sonic for his wrong-doings, tried to stop them at every turn, and now, he had refused to go with the others when they had rushed to the cannon’s core in an attempt to stop the ARK from destroying their world. She hated to admit it, but deep down, she knew he was the only hope. He was the only one who knew the space colony well enough to do anything meaningful in the time they had left - but getting his help would be no small feat.

“Shadow, we need you!” She yelled, practically tripping over her own feet to come to a halt next to him. She couldn’t back out on her plea now. He would either refuse, or save them all. There were no half measures here.

His eyes - the colour of blood, and just as spine-chilling - swept over the expanse of space before him, turning to her.  “It’s all going according to plan,” he murmured, fixing her on the spot with a withering glare. “There is no reason for me to help them. Besides, there’s no way to save anyone.” 

He was so matter-of-fact. So cold and clinical about so many lives being taken away for a crime committed years ago, by a handful of people who may not even still be alive… Did he not see what he was doing? What he was allowing to unfold? His life so far hadn’t been easy, by any stretch of the imagination, but to destroy the Earth over it?

“There has to be!” She found herself blurting, her fists balled at her chest, “I know that people fight over the most trivial things,” she began, voice wavering and tentative, “Some people…” She continued, trying to pick her words carefully and think before she spoke, as she so often didn’t. Rage would not get the better of Amy Rose today. “…may be selfish like the professor said… But they’re basically good. If they try their best and never give up on their wishes… They always have a reason to be happy.”

The pink hedgehog paused for a moment, trying to gauge Shadow’s reaction to her words so far. His face was hard to read, stoic and brooding as he was, and with the whirlwind of emotions swirling in her head she was struggling to separate the facade of nonchalance from any underlying emotion or sign of doubt. She swallowed hard, brows furrowing, as she put the last pieces of her plea together. Her nails bit into the palms of her hands, a tentative step forward bringing her closer to him as she pleaded, “That’s why you should help them out! Saving them is a good thing! Shadow, I beg you, please do it for them. Give them a chance!”

The lab fell into near silence, the only sounds the beeping of long-abandoned equipment and echoes of Amy’s voice as it faded away in the enormity of the room.

His eyes hadn’t left hers, not for a moment, but now, they flickered over her, regarding her as if this was the first time he had seen her, and she had just asked the world of him. 

Now that she thought about it, that wasn’t far from the truth. 

He turned back to the window. She searched his face for an answer - for even an incline of what he may say - but he gave away nothing. Instead, Shadow closed his eyes.The air felt thin, time seeming to fray and threatening to snap. It couldn’t have been longer than a moment, but to Amy, it felt like eternity. 

Then, his face twisted in a sneer. 

“No.” 

Amy gasped as Shadow’s eyes opened. She could feel the hate wash over her. 

“You talk about what they want, their hopes and dreams and wishes - but what about mine? Am I supposed to give up, to pander to people who have sought to harm me? To use me?” His expression darkened, shifting to something that sent a chill down her spine. “Why should I?” 

He snarled, turning sharply to face her head on. “Why should I save them? These people who, by your own admission, are selfish?”

“That’s not what I-”

“I won’t help them. They can all go to hell!”

Tears pricked at the corners of her eyes, welling and threatening to fall. She’d shrunk further away from him with each word, feeling less and less like she was capable of changing his mind, and more like she was being scolded for her naivety. Blood rushed in her ears, the pounding of her heart deafening her as the fire she had felt in her stomach was all but put out by his words raining down around her. 

She’d failed. Fallen short. 

But somehow… something told her she couldn’t just give in. Laying down and taking whatever she was given wasn’t her style. Maybe once upon a time, but not now. 

“But Shadow, I know that under all of the pain you're good! I know you-”

“You know nothing!” He spat, quills bristling as a sharp, derisive followed. “You want to save them? Do it yourself.” 

The fire roared. It licked against her insides, boiling her blood and building pressure in her system. It was like her veins were no longer for transporting oxygen - they were a part of a boiler system that was over pressurised, and the safety valve was ripped away. She was ready to blow, and unfortunately for Shadow, he’d blocked the last outlet for her steam. 

She realised what she’d done when the palm of her hand started stinging, and his face snapped towards the glass he stood in front of. She’d slapped him. Hard. So hard, in fact, that there was already a red handprint forming on the side of his muzzle. It looked sore, and any other time, she would have apologised profusely - but the rage that still simmered forbade her from showing remorse. Before he could retaliate, she found herself racing out of the lab and down the hallway in the direction her friends had taken, straight for the Cannon Core.

The soles of her boots on the sheet metal of the floor drummed in her head, seeming to sync with her thundering blood. Every second mattered. Gerald had given them twenty-seven minutes. Some of that time had already slipped through her fingers, so Chaos only knew how long she had now.

The walkway she was on came to a junction, causing her to slow and eventually stop. The corridor had split in two, open doorways yawning to the left and right with no clear indication as to which was the way to the cannon core. To the left, purple walls and strobing lights lit glass floors and moving platforms, while the right glowed an ominous red, the hexagonal pathway seeming to go on forever. 

“Red means danger,” she murmured to no one in particular, taking a tentative step towards the right-hand door. Rings of light seemed to race up the walls towards the entryway. It was almost as if they were trying to push her away and convince her to go down the other route, but that just served to convince Amy that this had to be the right way. Of course the mad scientist who had set the ARK on a crash course with the Earth would want to keep people away from the metaphorical off switch for his plan.

With a quick scan of the corridor she found a rail that ran along the roof, with a handle hanging from it. If it did what she thought it did, it could be a quicker way to traverse the tunnel before her. Manoeuvring herself to see further down the twists and turns and realising she couldn’t see the end, or even the light that might mark it, she concluded that any boost to speed she could give herself would be a welcome one. With that in mind, she backed up a few steps and ran, leaping for the handle. The jolt of inertia was enough to slide along the rail, and before long, she was travelling at a good pace.

The tunnel twisted, throwing her violently in one direction, and then the other, with lights flashing and dissipating all the while. It was making her feel queasy. In desperation, she shut her eyes tight in hopes of a temporary reprieve, but the lights came to a sudden stop. She cracked an eye open, squinting to get a better look at where the light ended, to see where the rail went once the transition to black was made, but with horror she realised it was the open expanse of a new room, cyan sparks of electricity punctuating the otherwise pitch black. The rail came to an abrupt halt, the handle hitting the stop plate at the end with a thunk, and she was flung forward into the empty air. 

Amy shrieked, the possibility that this was her end, not the collision with the Earth, briefly filling her head as she searched for something to grab or land on. Columns hung from the ceiling, too far away for her to use to stop her descent, and all around her was nothing but blackness. A void.

But, as her limbs wheeled, panic rising, she saw the familiar glow of the tunnel she had been launched from. Had she tipped forward? Rolled in the air somehow to look back at where she’d come from? No, she couldn’t have. The columns were still above her - this had to be new. That, and now that she was thinking more critically, this new light was more orange than red. That had to be the way forward.

Below her was a stone outcrop that stopped just before the orange room. That was her target but she was falling fast. Landing wouldn’t be as easy as it sounded. Not without an injury, anyway. 

She’d seen Sonic spindash his way out of situations like this before, but he normally had an enemy to aim for. Whoever had been here before had done a good job of clearing out any hostiles - too good a job. If she could just slow her fall somehow, then she could land without fear of breaking a leg - or worse. 

Then it hit her. Her hammer. She’d used it before to make a small wind tunnel. If she could just time it properly, she could decelerate just before she made contact with the ground. 

She held out her hands, her signature hammer appearing in her grip with a plume of smoke that was quickly whisked away as she gained speed. Once her vision cleared, she took stock again. She needed to act in five… four… three… two-

Panic struck her. She’d over estimated. The ground was approaching faster than she had expected. Eyes wide, veins icy with dread, she hefted the hammer, swinging it as hard and fast as she could in a circular motion.

A gust of air caught her. She slowed. And, with only a few quills windswept and out of place, she landed. With a deep exhale, shoulders dropping in relief, she allowed herself a moment to gather herself before taking on the next section of her journey.

Amy shook herself. She had to get moving again - the ARK was still plummeting. The Earth was still in danger. And, as much as she trusted and admired Sonic, she wasn’t sure  he could do it on his own this time. 

The path ahead was maybe ten feet long before it dropped into a chasm. Why there was such a large pit inside a space colony, she didn’t know, but it was going to be difficult to get over. A running start wouldn’t go amiss, but even an olympic long jumper would have trouble with a gap so wide. 

Absently, she hefted the hammer, flipping it in her hand as she puzzled over her dilemma. If only she could use something like an enemy as a stepping stone, or-

She paused, closely inspecting the hammer in her hand. An idea flickered in her mind like a lightbulb. That might just do it. 

She shook out her arms and hands, leaning forward and focusing on the glow of the next room. This jump had only two outcomes - suicide or success - and she had to have the confidence to make sure it was the latter. 

Rearing back and filling her lungs with the stagnant air of the chamber, Amy committed to her stunt, surging forward and charging at the crevasse. Her whole body felt like it was pulsing. Between her heartbeat, the cadence of her feet and adrenaline, she didn’t know which to blame.

As the end of the stone walkway approached, her mind’s eye replaced it with the white line of a long jump pit, and a yell tore from her throat. She threw herself into the abyss, leaping with all the strength she could in hopes that it would reduce how long she would have to spin her hammer. It was a new skill  after all, so the less she had to rely on it, the better.

She sailed through the air, the grip on her hammer turning her knuckles white; it would sting once she let go, but she was too terrified of dropping it. There was still so far to go, so much nothing to cross over, but she could feel that her fall had begun. 

With everything she had, Amy swung the hammer, letting herself twist with it in the air and hoping to land on solid ground. 

One, 

Two, 

Three full rotations, and she could feel herself getting dizzy. Keeping her eyes open had been a mistake for her stomach, which churned and protested, but she wouldn’t know when to stop otherwise. 

Four,

Five

Six rotations. The longer she spun, the more she felt like maybe she’d missed the edge, and was just spiralling into the void of nothing below, but something told her that she had to persevere. There seemed to be more and more orange in her blurry view of the world, which surely meant was at least close to the other side. 

One… 

More… 

Turn… 

She slowed, stopped, and staggered, the world still spinning even though she wasn’t. She’d made it. Her idea, insane as it was, had worked, and as her vision cleared the orange glow she had aimed for snapped into focus. What had once been an octagonal tunnel, now squared off with panels of glass, pulsed with amber light. 

Her heels clicked a staccato against the floor as she wobbled away from her landing spot, head swimming and hands shaky. Amy’s grip on her hammer faltered, the weapon slipping from her fingers and disappearing in a puff of smoke, and all she could do was watch. Much more effort might bring about another appearance of her breakfast, which wasn’t something she was keen to experience.

With each step, the haze of dizziness cleared. It was like she was wading through the last of a thick fog, finally emerging into the light of day. Unfortunate that the daylight in question was only the rest of the room, not the end of her journey, but at least the end was approaching. 

The back of the room split off into a T junction. To the right was a dead end, while the left path gave way to a room of shifting, spinning cubes and display panels that showed only the same amber light of the previous rooms swishing back and forth.

Now that her stomach had settled, Amy risked picking up the pace, following the corridor as it curved to the right. Cubes tumbled in the air, bathing her in their warm glow - but she had no time to enjoy it. Chaos only knew how long she had left before the ARK would collide with the Earth -or if she’d be able to stop the collision - but she had to try. Just because Shadow had refused to help, that didn’t mean she had to accept her fate. She could do this. She had to believe she could, because if she couldn’t, then-

The familiar sound of her heels on glass gave way to sloshing and a low buzzing sound. She’d been so preoccupied with her fate, so focused on her goal that she hadn’t realised she was in a new area. Three inches of fluid lapped against the soles of her shoes, the translucent amber liquid looking like it belonged in a reactor, not on the floor. The unnatural, tangerine hue almost gave her pause, but as she splashed through it she found herself having to think fast once more. 

Lazers and a metal barrier barred her way. She estimated that she would be able to slide under the barricade if she timed it right, and that the chance of getting the amber liquid on her skin - or worse, in her eyes or mouth - was worth the risk. She sped up, running until she was maybe two feet away from the lazer-wall and dropping into a slide.

Her nose grazed the metal, but she was under, and otherwise unharmed. Much to her relief, the liquid that coated the floor didn’t seem to be acidic, either, but for the time being that was the least of her concerns. 

Before her was a six foot wall, edged in the same metal as the barrier was made of, and no other direction to go. She knew she couldn’t jump that high. If she were lucky, and had a decent start, she might be able to get enough of a grip with her fingers to haul herself up. Possibles and maybes didn’t save the world, she knew, but neither did people who didn’t at least try against the odds. 

Backtracking as close to the lasers as she dared, she eyed the run-up she’d given herself. It should be enough.

Would be enough.

Had to be enough.

Filling her lungs, she rocked back. A fizzing sound and the smell of burning quills rolled over her. Too far. With a flinch and a quick pat of the affected area, she squared her shoulders, and took another deep breath…

Before running full speed at the wall. 

She charged, picking up as much speed as she dared before hurling herself upwards towards the ledge.

Her body slammed into the wall, chest and ribs screaming with the impact, but the tips of her fingers had caught on the ledge, holding her against the frigid surface. She wheezed in a breath, grimacing as she did, and walked the fingers of one hand onto the ledge until her palm sat against it. She repeated the process once she was sure her grip was sound, slowly grappling her way onto the surface until she was able to swing a leg up and roll onto the floor, panting with the exertion.  

Amy wanted to stay there. Sprawled on the floor, where the fate of the world wasn’t in her hands, and nothing more was needed of her, but she couldn’t do that. Even if Sonic could do this without her, she was sick of being the extra. The back up. The ‘just in case’. But not any more. That was going to change. 

She staggered to her feet, bathed in the crimson glow of the next corridor. It looked so similar to the first, but even though it had only been a few minutes since, that first rail ride felt a lifetime away. 

She crossed the threshold at a run, feeling the slope of the floor dip down towards the heart of the ARK. She was ready for this. She was going to make a difference.

The ground levelled out sharply, more of the amber swill from a few rooms ago coming into view in a roiling torrent past a sheer drop - one that she knew now that she could traverse with ease, thanks to her hammer. With a hop, skip, and a jump, she launched herself into the air, and realised just how far she would need to go.

From this angle, she saw that the orange flow rushed towards her, cascading down and away from where she assumed she needed to be. But, it plateaued - and presumably, flowed in the opposite direction on the other side. 

Smoke billowed around her as the hammer materialised, but quickly dispersed as she spun in the practised cyclone that had delivered her safely across the chasm before.

The world around her was a blur, flashes of colour and light that only made sense when she broke from the tornado she had created and let herself take it all in. She could see now that she had been right about the flow of water. It did flow the other way, with an equally steep slope that flowed into a pipe. That had to be it. The inlet to the canon core. 

Her trajectory landed her just past the section of level ground, a few paces into the decline, and the flow swept her off her feet with a splash. Control would be hard won, she realised, as her form took the path of least resistance, swerving from left to right at an increasingly alarming pace. When her body started to rotate, threatening to have her careen down the space-age log flume head first, she felt her heart skip a beat. Relinquishing the control of her direction was one thing, but her orientation was something that wasn’t up for debate. 

Small adjustments to compensate for the swivel seemed to keep her facing the right direction, much to her relief. “Thank Gaia,” she found herself whispering, hoping that her small praise would be enough to convince any higher power that she was grateful for this mercy, and to continue sending it her way. 

A crackle filled the air, the sound of an intercom creaking to life. Amy glanced around to find the speaker, even though she knew it would be of no use to her to know where it was. She was left only with the sound of a vaguely familiar voice echoing around the pipe she was stuck in.

“All of you ungrateful humans,” it began, tone foreboding and morose. Was that… the scientist? The one who had made Shadow? “Who took everything from me…” It was! A recording of him couldn’t mean anything good. She found herself searching frantically for an exit; Something in her chest told her she needed to get out of this tunnel. “Will feel my loss, and despair!”

As the last of Gerald's announcement ricocheted around her, her body was thrown around the curve of the pipe and light winked into existence in front of her. It was the end of the water way, she realised, but not quickly enough to avoid being dumped onto the floor unceremoniously.

She groaned, checking where her limbs had contacted the ground for any signs of damage - it was mostly small cuts and scrapes, but she had the feeling there would be bruises in more places tomorrow - and dusted herself down, rising to her feet cautiously.

There it was. The cannon core. And between her and it were Sonic, Knuckles, and- 

“What in Chaos’ name is that!?” Amy shrieked. She had seen some sights in her time, but this? It was grotesque. Calling it anything else fell short of the true horror of the lumbering beast that shook the ground with each step. Its skin seemed to pool around its joints and feet, like it had an excess of it that refused to slough off despite its best efforts. Tubes protruded from all over its body at odd angles, leaving wounds that looked jagged and inflamed, ready to rupture at any moment. 

The least offensive part of this behemoth was the canister on its back full of fluorescent green liquid that sloshed with every movement, the glow it provided highlighting the folds and wrinkles of the too-loose skin that covered its body.

Between the disgusting lifeform in front of her and the fear writhing like a snake in her stomach, retaining her lunch had become no easy feat. But, she was convinced that adrenaline was the only thing keeping her from vomiting.

“Amy!? What are you doing here!?” Sonic yelled, incredulity and fear clear in the crack of his voice.

“I asked Shadow to help us, and he refused,” she proffered, holding her hands out and summoning her Piko Piko hammer. “So I came to help instead.”

“No, no way,” the blue hedgehog said, shaking his head. “You need to go back and-” 

A roar interrupted him, the beast clearly annoyed that it was being ignored.

“We don’t have time to argue!” She spat back, hefting the hammer and looking to Knuckles for back up. If anyone would understand, it would be him.

The echidna looked between his friends, knowing that by supporting Amy, he would put her in harm’s way, but by supporting Sonic, he would give Amy the impression he didn’t believe she was capable of helping them. He gave an irritated sigh, and turned to Sonic. “She’s right, we have to get the Master Emerald into that shrine now or we’re all toast! Amy,” he turned to her, violet eyes burning, “You need to keep that thing busy while Sonic and I get to the shrine - think you can do that?”

She nodded curtly, her expression settling into one of conviction as she focused on the monster that lumbered towards them now, trying to decide if she was insane for agreeing to this, or brave for even trying. For now, she would go with the latter.

As her friends raced for the shrine, a heaviness settled on her chest. Her blood felt cold, like she'd had a bucket of water dumped over her and the raging inferno she had stoked when she began this journey had been drowned. This thing was horrifying. Even its movements seemed unnatural, like its muscles weren't intended for its skeleton, and every stuttering step made the loose skin of its joints undulate sickeningly.

She choked back the bile that rose in her throat, refusing to take her eyes off it on principle alone. It probably already knew she was terrified, already knew that she wanted to turn tail and run until her lungs screamed for her to stop - but she wouldn’t. Not today. 

Her hammer felt leaden in her grip. The weight of the world, of her friends lives, of her own future - they all seemed present in its heft. She took a shaky step forward, feeling the fear rise but knowing she couldn't let it overwhelm her. Another step followed the first, the façade of confidence settling over her like a warm, comforting blanket. 

This was it. Her chance to prove herself. “Never fear,” she began, swiping the hammer to her side and shifting her weight to run. “Amy Rose is here!”

The biolizard lunged for her, snapping its toothless maw. If she were any slower, it would have crushed her arm.

She ran to the right, hoping for an opening where she could hit it hard enough to at least give it pause. But the beast lumbered after her, pivoting in the shallow puddle of water it wallowed in and sending ripples over the lip with each thunderous step. 

Keeping a distance between her and its mouth was Amy's top priority. Visions of what would become of her if she didn't played in her mind, and she had to physically shake her head to banish the thoughts. She needed adrenaline. Optimism. Not fear.

Amy stole a glance over her shoulder. She hadn't covered much ground, but already the monster seemed to be tiring. Its breathing was heavy. Laboured. Ragged. 

How was it so tired after barely moving? 

That was exactly it, it turned out. The thing barely could move, and so what little it had already managed was a gargantuan task for its body. If she could exhaust it - however briefly - that would be an advantage, one that was sorely needed.

With that in mind, Amy re-doubled her efforts, antagonising the beast by shouting over her shoulder at it. The lumbering started to slow, and it wasn't long before the biolizard came to a halt. 

Steam seemed to billow from its mouth with each exhale, and each inhale seemed hard won. There it was. The opening she needed.

Skidding almost to a stop, she pivoted on a heel and ran at its side, torn for a moment on where to hit it. The side was easily accessible, fleshy, and likely to do some internal damage if she could hit it hard enough, but the pipes that wound around its form gave her pause. They had to have a purpose. Transporting something, most likely - something that it needed, or else its creator wouldn't have left them there. 

Those pipes all seemed to converge on its back. Whatever they held was either flowing to or from there.

Hoping her guess was correct, Amy leapt. Her mind flashed back to her leap of faith across the chasm. But she had overcome that, just like she would overcome this. 

She crested the mass of crimson flesh, her boot slipping on loose skin as she landed. The shaky breaths beneath her shifted the pipes she'd followed. Just as she thought, they all appeared to connect to a device on its back.

That had to be it. 

A yellow glow pulsated atop the machine, growing brighter with each inhale, and dimming with each exhale. Surely, that wasn't a coincidence? It had to be a life support - or have at least some impact on the biolizard's continued life.

Having convinced herself, she did what she always did when all that stood between her and victory was a metal box. 

She swung her hammer at it.

The familiar crunch of her hammer connecting with metal brought a smile to her lips. The device crackled with electricity, pops and fizzes an audible indicator of broken connections. 

Beneath her, the biolizard screamed, its cry akin to a yowling cat, and shook itself violently enough to throw her to the ground. 

She skidded across the paved pathway, scraping her shoulder in the process. But as pain pulsed through her, she couldn't help but wonder how it had been so easy to defeat something that had been touted as the ultimate life form.

And then it moved. 

Toothless jaws snapped at her, missing by mere inches. She flinched away, scrambling to her feet and bolting away. 

This time, the biolizard didn't make a move towards her though. It's feet were planted firmly in the murky orange pool, and no sloshing could be heard.

What she did hear, though, was scarier than any eerie silence. It was like a blockage being cleared from a pipe at high velocity, a resounding poh noise, followed by stone crunching and skittering away.

It took every ounce of courage she had to turn and look behind her. 

A ball of what she could only describe as shadows tore towards her, purple energy crackling across its surface like lightning. 

she threw herself out of the way, keeping her eyes trained on the monster. Its maw opened again, energy swelling in its throat, and another popping sound exploded from it, firing the orb at her.

There would be no more wearing it out. The shadows seemed capable of following her, this new ball proved, as it swerved towards her at frightening speed. Dodging was the only option.‘Think, Amy! Think, think, think!’ She chastised, eyes darting across the beast in hopes of finding an answer.

To her surprise, she found it - a cord that ran from its mouth to its back. If she was fast, and careful, she could get to its back from there to do some more damage, and avoid the shadows at the same time.

There was no time to second guess herself. Raising her hammer again, she charged, side-stepping the second orb in the nick of time. A yell tore from her throat, half from terror and half from the rising sensation in her chest that goaded her to do better, to be better - to be a hero. 

She reached the cable just as a third ball started forming. With precision achieved by pure adrenaline, she made her first step onto the tube, following quickly by her second. It felt surreal. The narrowing of her focus to include only the pound of her veins, her boots on the wire as she barrelled up to its back. Her foot had been on its back for hardly a heartbeat when she slammed her hammer into the side of the still crackling unit. 

The casing cracked open, chips of metal spraying from the gash. She hefted the hammer back over her head, slamming it down onto the orange dome.

Glass shattered, spraying her with shards that sliced at her arms and cheeks. She hissed, the tiny cuts stinging individually and as one, the sensation overwhelming. 

A familiar rage built. One she’d experienced a thousand times before but never quite this intensely. She swung again, and again, the crumpling sound mixing with the yowling to create a truly ear-splitting cacophony. But in her rage, everything had quieted. 

When the world pitched, it took a moment for her to realise why. The biolizard was shaking, trying to throw her off, but as she fell, her hammer caught on one of the pipes, jolting her to a stop.

Another yowl, the tugging clearly causing it at least some discomfort. She could feel the noise in her bones, the vibrations rattling her. But this could be worse. In fact, this could be a fantastic opportunity to end this whole thing, here and now. 

Bracing her feet against its side, boots sliding on skin too big for its frame, she pulled.

The cable popped out of the socket, spraying amber ichor as it flailed, and for what she hoped was the last time today, she hit the ground. 

She rolled away, knowing that she needed to dissipate the inertia if she wanted to walk away from this encounter rather than limp. Now that her hearing had returned, she could tell just how distressed it really was. The screaming and sloshing as it thrashed in what she assumed was agony was deafening - but it seemed like her ordeal was over. Now she just needed Sonic and Knuckles to get the chaos emerald back out of the shrine and-

Cobalt lightning crackled around the shrine, the master emerald pulsing with power and spinning in place. A flash of blinding light painted the chamber white and Amy threw up her arms to shield her eyes.

Before she risked opening them again, though, a roar shook her to the bone. It was the same sound as the Biolizard had made when she’d damaged it, only lower pitched. 

She whirled, hammer in hand ready to deal what she hoped was the killing blow, and was met not with the defeated form she had left, but one that had reared back to let out one last yell. With the beast on its back legs the looseness of its skin was more prominent, the disproportionate nature of its form more obvious. The pressure it was exerting on its stubby legs made them shake, the open wounds all over its body weeping, blood and pus running over the ripples and folds of its body. 

Her stomach churned, but before her mind could comprehend the truely sickening parts of its visage, a flash of blue enveloped it, and it was gone.

Turning back to the shrine, she took the steps two at a time, reaching Sonic and Knuckles at the Master Emerald’s plinth. “What was that?”

Sonic opened his mouth to speak, but the answer never came. The ARK pitched to the side, the artificial gravity of the ship momentarily failing, suspending them above the ground. “Since we’ve stopped the Chaos Emeralds… why is the space colony still on a crash course to Earth?” Knuckles managed before gravity kicked back in, throwing him, Sonic, and Amy to the ground.

“The prototype is still alive, and he’s controlling the space colony as its falling to Earth!” Eggman announced through the ARK’s communication system. This new information settled like a brick in Amy’s stomach as the trio staggered to their feet. She’d failed to kill the biolizard, and now, it was going to destroy the Earth anyway. All that she’d been through, all that she’d done… It was all for nothing, after all. “He’s become one with the space colony, and is determined to keep it on its collision course!”

Dumbfounded, she looked to Knuckles. He was the guardian of the Master Emerald - surely, there was something he could do? But the echidna wasted no time in turning to Sonic. The blue blur stared his friend down for a beat, his grass-green eyes flickering to Amy and back, as if considering something but discounting it before it had even had time to gestate. “I need to go super,” the hedgehog announced, taking a step towards the master Emerald. “But I don’t know if I can do this on my own.”

Her body moved before her mind could catch it. The pink hedgehog stepped forward, hammer evaporating into smoke, hands balling to fists. “Let me try, too!” There was no room for argument in her tone, but that didn’t stop her blue beau from trying.

“Ames, no, you can’t-”

“You don’t know that! Just because I haven’t before doesn’t mean I can’t!” His eyes were wide with shock, and something else. Awe, she hoped, but equally it could have been disbelief. When he sighed and held his hand out for her to take, though, she knew it didn’t matter. He was going to let her try, and that meant that at the very least, he believed there was a chance.

She took it, the pair raising their hands above their heads and studying the ceiling of the shrine. Like icicles forming on a window sill, their energy seeped from the stonework, forming the seven gems that had started this mess, and would give them the power to end it.

The emeralds descended, hovering for a moment before spinning faster and faster around them.

She could feel it. The tumultuous power, crashing into her like waves. The eddies lapped at her, like ice water around her ankles, and rose steadily until she thought she might drown. The emeralds were moving so fast now that they were a blur. It was impossible to tell one from another. Another wave of chaos energy crashed into her, almost knocking her to her knees - but she stood strong in its onslaught, feeling the cold sink past her skin, chill her blood and freeze her bones. 

White light flashed from between them, hands separating as the power split. Sonic glowed with the golden light of his super form, and Amy too shone, but with a rose-tinted gold of her own. The frigid chill of chaos energy was nothing like her own rage. So alien, so… different. So… other. It was somehow both exhilarating and terrifying. 

Sonic seemed to take it all in his stride - but then, he had been super before, hadn’t he? She’d always wondered what it felt like, and now that she had experienced it, she could understand how he used this power to save the world all those times before.  

Sonic shot her his signature cocky grin, pointing to the roof. Up and out. She nodded, and the duo crouched in unison, extending their legs as if to jump, but instead shooting clean through the walls of the cannon core. 

When Eggman had informed them that the biolizard had ‘become one’ with the ARK, Amy had been sure that he was exaggerating. The truth, however, was much more horrifying than she’d imagined.

Its flesh had wrapped itself around the muzzle of the eclipse cannon, the once loose folds of skin stretching and contorting to accommodate its new metal appendage. It was dragging the space colony with it, under what steam she didn’t know, and was headed straight for the planet she called home. 

“Sonic, Amy! Can you hear me?” Eggman’s voice boomed. “He’s very weak without his life support system. Aim for the red swellings to damage him! You’re our last hope!”

Weak without his life support… Her hunch had been right! The device was keeping it alive, and now, with the machine broken, they at least had a chance of winning. 

The hedgehogs shared a knowing look - one that held the promise to win, or die trying - and shared a definitive nod. 

Sonic blasted off, a trail of light marking his path as he weaved towards the monster. It was slow, cumbersome, but even so, if one of its limbs connected… she dreaded to think what the damage could be. 

They had to do this quickly.

As Sonic ploughed into the first of the swellings, bursting through the thin layer of skin, Amy realised that she hadn’t moved. She’d been staring, horrified at what was in front of her. 

She shook herself, furrowing her brows. She couldn’t just float here and do nothing. 

It didn’t take long to find another of the sores Eggman had mentioned - the thing was riddled with them - but before she pushed off to make her first attack, something caught her eye. 

Beneath its mass, a glow was building. Amethyst and ruby and aquamarine. It was mesmerising, and as it roiled and grew, she wondered what is was. 

Her question was answered as the orb grew and stretched out towards her, a beam of searing energy missing her by mere inches. It was danger. It was pain. It was certain death. 

A fire having been lit under her, she flew in a wide arc towards the pustule she was now aiming for, careful to keep an eye out for the beam of energy now that she knew it was capable of such a feat. The closer she got, though, the more its flailing limbs and snapping jaws made her hesitate. Even with her super form, the hurdle of failure loomed large above her, every time she hadn’t been strong enough, or fast enough playing on repeat in her mind. 

She rolled out of the way as one of its arms thrashed at her, the disorientation of unfamiliar momentum causing her to bounce off its scaly hide and careen down its spine to float to a halt only a meter or so before it merged with the ARK. 

Silently, she cursed herself. How could she help Sonic to kill this thing if she couldn’t even get close enough to its weak spots to do anything? 

It was then that she spotted it - the blistered skin just past the curve of its side. A glance to its head confirmed that the beast was preoccupied with Sonic, and from this angle, it wouldn’t be able to get her with the beam until it was too late - for it, at least. 

With speed she hadn’t possessed before the boost of the Chaos Emeralds, she launched herself around and ploughed into the thin, inflamed skin. It burst with enough force to fire her towards its head, her inert body tumbling head over heels at speed. In space, there was no friction to slow her, no end in sight to the vomit-inducing spinning. Not, at least, without some intervention.

From seemingly no where, its huge head swung towards her faster than it had any right to be capable of. She lifted her arms to cross over her face defensively knowing that she hadn’t the time to move, and was launched by the force of its nose connecting with her ribs.

She was like a pinball in a machine  - moving at blinding speed with a trajectory that would inevitably result in collision.

And collide she did.

The ARK loomed large as she careened towards it, her form tumbling in the vast emptiness of space. Dizziness crept in on her, but before it could take hold, pain blossomed across her back and shoulder.

She’d slammed into the ARK, and from the crunching and crackling coming from behind her, she’d likely hit a window. That, or she’d done more damage to herself than she thought.

“Ouch,” she whimpered. The sound was half-reflexive, half-genuine, as she cradled the shoulder that had taken the brunt of the hit. “That thing really packs a punch…”

With a groan, she propped herself up on her elbows, watching as Sonic ploughed into the beast that had just thrown her like a ragdoll. She felt so useless. Managing to absorb enough Chaos energy to transform had been a shock, as had defending herself against the prototype of Shadow before it had teleported outside, but even now, after all of those achievements she was starting to feel like she wasn’t enough to fix this. 

Her nails bit into her palms even through the padding of her gloves. Giving up was the easy route, the one she’d sworn she’d abandoned back when she’d helped Gamma fight its programming. She had to keep trying, or else what had all of this been for? 

She took a long, slow inhale, filling her lungs to the brim and holding the breath for a second to centre herself, then released it in a steady, foggy stream. The world needed saving, and while she trusted that Sonic would do his best, she didn’t want him falling short because she’d thrown in the towel.

Gingerly, she rolled onto her stomach, aware of every slight movement as pinpricks of pain rolled through her. Were it not for the lack of gravity, she wondered if she would even have managed that, let alone bring her knees up to kneel on the observation deck window.Now that she’d been given the chance to stop, the adrenaline that had brought her this far was waning and the exhaustion was starting to creep in. Maintaining a super form was so tiring… how did Sonic do this?

Knowing that she couldn’t let herself be swept to shore, that she had to stay in the sea of energy until the danger had passed, she forced herself to open her eyes. At first, all she saw was her own reflection staring back at her through a spiderweb of cracks in the glass. But, as her eyes adjusted, she saw something else. Someone else. 

Shadow. And he was staring back at her, looking like he’d seen a ghost.

He’d underestimated her ability, just like everyone else did, and had expected her to perish long before this point. That had to be it.

One, last act of defiance, then. Before she ended this fight and did what so many thought was impossible for her. 

She pushed herself off the window of the lab, threw her arms behind her, and stuck her tongue out at the ultimate lifeform with gusto, before turning and flying back to where Sonic was fighting the biolizard.

 It was childish, she knew, but his perception of her was the last thing she was worried about right now.

More of the pustules that covered the lizard had been ruptured, she noted, which felt like it would at least help. If this behemoth was capable of feeling pain, it had to be in agony by now. Wounds wept, blood and pus and chaos energy oozing from each and every one. This thing, relentless as it was, had to be put out of its misery.

She balled her fists, ready to weave her way towards the monster and hit more of its sores. Sonic had managed to destroy so many of them, and she didn’t want to end up as just the distraction again. She’d done so much today, been through so much. Now wasn’t the time to trip over the hurdle.

She flew towards the beast, feeling every injury she’d sustained so far screaming at her to stop, that she’d done enough, and she could call herself a hero now. But heroes didn’t give up just because they had a few bruises and cuts, or because they’d been thrown around like a rag doll. Heroes kept going. 

With the lack of resistance from the expanse of space, she gained speed quickly, tearing through the chasm between her and her target, but in her periphery, something caught her attention. A white-gold glow - not Sonic’s gold, nor her own rose-gold, but a new one. 

It was Shadow, and he was in his super form. 

“What- what are you-”

“This thing is my prototype,” he began, his blood-red eyes focused on the biolizard. “It’s time I prove my superiority.”

He burst forward, leaving her to trail behind as he slammed into one of the sores at speed she struggled to see, let alone emulate, and when he was thrown backwards by the force of its skin splitting, he didn’t pause to look for another. He used the arc of his trajectory to fly around it, looking for another spot to damage.

This was the difference between her and real fighters, she thought to herself. For all she knew, this was Shadow’s first time in a super form too. And he was dealing with it so much better than she was. Granted, he didn’t need to fight so hard to change the direction he moved in with the help of his air shoes, but something about the ease with which he moved, the confidence… she was jealous. 

“Can both of you hear me!?” Eggman yelled. There was panic in his voice, and Amy couldn’t in good conscious say she blamed him for it. “Atmosphere entry in about 4 minutes! Hurry!”

There it was. Four minutes. 240 seconds. Barely any time left to save the world. 

She summoned her hammer, determined not to fall behind. It felt so light to her now, with chaos energy coursing through her veins, but that just meant she could put more of her strength into the swing.

There was a pustule where its skin met the ARK that Sonic and Shadow seemed to have missed. She pivoted towards it, swinging her hammer above her head ready to deal her first blow. As soon as she was close enough, the hammer smashed into the skin, eliciting a screech of pain from the beast as it thrashed in agony. It swung its clawed hands at Sonic, missing by at least three feet, and did the same to Shadow, failing to catch him with its claws. 

Its head whipped around, more sluggish than it had been when it had thrown her into the observation deck window, and the motion tore its skin.

Now that she looked more closely, the movement of its arms had torn the skin at its shoulders, too.

It was falling apart, right in front of their eyes. 

Sonic and Shadow looked frantically for another swelling to hit, another weak point to attack, but their lack of movement told her they found nothing. The end was nigh.

Amy floated to the broken device on its back, seeing that it still crackled and fizzed with electricity even now. The wires that remained attached still trailed its body, inert and empty of life-giving energy. She jammed the handle of her hammer under the unit, using the head as a lever, and separated the metal oval from the biolizard with a crunch. She reeled back.

The hammer connected with the unit, sending it careening towards the biolizard’s head, tearing the wires out of itself, or out of the biolizards skin. 

The explosions from it started small. The size of a basketball, perhaps, or a little larger, but they seemed to set off a chain reaction.

The three hedgehogs dispersed, re-convening to watch as the monster went up in flames.

It was dead. The Earth was safe.

They’d done what had felt impossible just fifteen minutes ago.

As the three of them regarded each other, Sonic and Amy looking battered, bruised, and exhausted, they couldn’t help but smile. “We did it…” Amy breathed, releasing her hammer for it to disperse into smoke.

“We did,” Sonic beamed. There was something in his smile - relief, maybe, and pride - that she hadn’t expected. She’d thought he was so sure they could do this. He’d given no reason for her to think otherwise. But it seemed as though he hadn’t been as confident as she’d thought.

Shadow huffed, crossing his arms and turning his gaze to Amy. “Was that outcome in doubt?” To him, it seemed as though it wasn’t. Like the moment he was involved in something, it would go exactly as he planned.

“Heh, maybe not,” Sonic said. His smile grew wider, another small laugh escaping him, before he pointed to the ARK with his thumb. “We’d best get back, or the others will wonder what happened!”

He was gone before either of them could speak. Amy turned to Shadow, ready to chastise Sonic in his absence, but found that the surly being was staring intently at her. She couldn’t meet his eyes, instead looking away and scratching at the side of her head.

She’d slapped him, made faces at him, and now, it seemed, she owed him an apology. But first, she had to ask him something.

“What made you decide to help?” She blurted, chancing a glance at him and finding that he was still staring. His eyes flickered away from her then, though - the smallest hint of embarrassment on his face.

“I… I don’t know.” He said, but with the way his eyes searched the speckled sky, she wasn’t so sure that was the whole truth. “Maybe your words just needed time to sink in.”

All she could muster was a tired smile. She wished she could be more energetic, her usual enthusiastic self, about this change of heart. But everything was taking its toll. She was exhausted. She could feel her eyes fluttering, and she ached everywhere. “Well, I’m glad you came to your senses, Shadow,” she managed, placing a hand on his shoulder. “We couldn’t have done it… without… you…”

The world seemed to blur. The stars that had been so sharp, so defined, only moments ago. Now, they looked like street lamps through a rainy window, particles dancing in ways she knew couldn’t be real, but they mesmerised her all the same. It made her realise just how tired she was. How leaden her limbs felt. If she could just… close… her eyes…

They closed for a moment, the white-gold of Shadow’s super form disappearing and reappearing further away. But he didn’t seem to be moving. He was facing the ARK, but the jets of his shoes were off, and his posture hadn’t changed from when she had last seen him.

Ah. She was the one moving. She could see it now. Her own glow was gone, and the stars were getting smaller. She was falling. Falling towards the Earth. And worst of all, she didn’t even had the energy to panic. The bliss of exhaustion had fogged her mind, and falling felt like the rest she needed.

She blinked again. The white-gold of Shadow’s form was closer now. Had she stopped falling? No, something told her that she was still plummeting. Maybe it was the angle he was at? She wasn’t sure.

The only thing she knew for certain was that he looked terrified. Ruby eyes were wide, mouth open in a yell, gloved hand outstretched as if he were begging for her to take it. But she couldn’t. It was too much. She was too tired. 

The world went dark.

Everything ached. Her back, her shoulder, her legs. Everything. Even her eyelids seemed to ache, but she needed to open them. The murmuring around her was deafeningly loud and too quiet for her to understand all at once, with a peal of piercing ringing permeating both. Would the light of the world be that bit too much? The thing that overwhelmed her senses? She hoped not. She needed to know if they’d succeeded - if the biolizard was dead. Somewhere in the soupyness of her waking mind, she thought they had - but everything was fuzzy from the point she’d hit the ARK.

Cautiously, she cracked an eyelid open slowly, testing her surroundings in the smallest increment possible. Once one eye was fully open, she chanced the other. Everything was so blurry. The blobs of colour that crowded around her reminded her of her friends. Blue, yellow, red… and white, too. The bat that had helped them was that shade of white, she recalled. Rouge, was it? That sounded right. 

Her head lolled towards the blue smear, each blink sharpening her unfocused gaze. 

“Did… we win?” She croaked, voice hoarse. 

“Ames! You’re awake!” Sonic rushed to kneel beside her, brows drawn in concern and worry in his eyes as they came into view. “How you feelin’?”

This was the most attentive he’d ever been, she thought to herself. It was… nice. The attention from her crush. But something about it didn’t feel as good as she always thought it would. She must have hit her head harder than she thought. 

“I’m fine.” She sounded so weak. “I guess I have you to thank for that, though.” She managed a smile as he helped her to her feet, almost falling when her knee gave way and he caught her. The worry seemed to spread on his features, but he was trying to mask it. She could tell, from the way he tried to force his face back into the cocky grin he usually sported. 

“Nah, Ames,” he breathed. “We were almost beat, but then Shadow showed up and finished the thing off. I started back to the ship, and then…” the words died in his throat, his green eyes shifting guiltily before he turned to look to his left, away from the observation deck windows and towards the shadows that enveloped the entrance to the room. “You… you passed out. And Shadow saved you. He caught you before you - before you fell.”

It was all coming back to her now. His face as he hurtled towards her, eyes wide and full of fear. 

She followed Sonic’s gaze, her own settling on the hedgehog who was mostly obfuscated by the dark. Shadow. He’d saved her life, even after what she’d said, what she’d done - oh, Gaia, she’d slapped him, hadn’t she? 

Her legs felt like jelly again. Of all the individuals to piss off, she’d chosen Shadow, and not only that, but it seemed like he’d forgiven her too. You didn’t save someone you disliked, did you? But then, he had saved the humans, or at least helped to, and he claimed to hate them. 

“I- I see.” She choked out. She swallowed hard and chewed nervously on her lip. She had to apologise. That had to be the first thing she said to him. But how do you do that? Maybe ‘sorry for slapping you for trying to blow up the Earth’ was enough, she wondered, but shook the thought from her head. As soon as she could stand on her own, she needed to have an answer. 

“Yeah, it was weird,” Sonic mused, bringing her out of her thoughts and back to the real world. “By the time I realised, he was already half way to you, and he looked-”

“Worried,” Amy said, and he nodded in agreement.

Amy sighed. Of all the things she’d had to do today, of all the fears she’d faced… Apologising to, and thanking, the one who’d saved her seemed to be the hardest one. 

She tested putting her weight on her legs. A part of her was pleased that any damage wasn’t permanent, but a small part of her still dreaded the conversation she was about to have. With a weak smile to Sonic, she limped over to her saviour. 

He was sat against a wall, seeming to be fixated on a spot in the middle of the floor with a barely perceptible frown on his brows.

“Hey.”

He startled, and jerked his head up to meet her eyes.

“Hello.” His gaze was… intense. A vermillion blaze that felt like it would burn her where she stood. But this time, the heat was… comforting. Like a blanket on a cold night, or… like her own, well restrained rage that burned below the surface. He was like her, she realised. Someone who held part of themselves at bay for fear it would be too much. 

He motioned to the ground next to him. She swallowed hard again, hurrying to settle against the wall and almost forgetting to tuck her dress under her. As she settled, glancing over to her friends who hurried to pretend they hadn’t been staring, her usually steady hands shook.

She didn’t look at him initially. She was too ashamed of herself, and it seemed like he had no desire to break the silence either. 

“I’m sorry I-”

“I shouldn’t have-” 

They spoke in unison, stopping as soon as they realised they were talking over each other. Silence fell again. After a few moments, he waved her on. 

Her throat felt dry. She knew that he didn’t hold her actions against her. He wouldn’t have saved her if he really disliked her. But navigating this conversation would be difficult regardless. She fiddled with the hem of her skirt. “What made you do it?” She began, chancing a look at him. Those eyes were upon her again, those eyes that simmered with an anger that she now understood was not for her. “I mean- what… Why did you come and help me and Sonic? I thought that you… that you wanted the Earth to be destroyed?”

His gaze lingered for a moment, shifting from one eye to the other and then cutting away to look back at the floor. “Humans are awful.” The silence that dragged out made her think that perhaps he wanted her to say something, but she didn’t know what. “I would have had no remorse if they had all met their end today. I wanted it, even, and you know that, but…” his voice petered out, as if he didn’t want to verbalise what he was about to say. He let out an exasperated sigh. “But you… you were ready to die for them. For people you don’t know, for people who don’t know you and don’t care about you.”

He turned back to her, eyes searching her face, as if he would find something written there that would put his mind at ease.

 A smile spread across her face, a tiny laugh whispering past her lips. “Thank you, Shadow. That… that means a lot.”

He gave a kurt nod, moving to stand, but she caught his arm and his attention again. As he looked back to her, something pressed against his cheek. Something soft. Something soothing. 

It was her lips, pressed delicately against the cheek she had slapped only hours before. 

She sank back to sit against the wall, a self-satisfied smile still on her lips, as his own face started to burn. 

She’d kissed him. This girl, who he’d snarled at and insulted. Who had stung his face with her palm. Had kissed him. 

And, stranger still, it had left him wondering what the sensation would feel like had she caught his lips rather than his cheek, as his face began to burn.

Thanks for reading, and I really hope you enjoyed this fic :)

[tossawary]

It was absolutely insane how you dropped a juicy chonky chapter everyday for servant to a different king. Nothing but admiration and respect. How did you do it? What was the planning behind being able to release a chapter everyday? How long have you been working on the piece?

Thank you! "Servant to a Different King" was part of the Moshang Big Bang 2023 event. Traditionally, a Big Bang is 50k words (or more), and pairs up an author who wants to write a fic and an artist who agrees to create art for that fic. (Moshang BB23 had a minimum expectation of 10-30k words.) The sign-ups for this event were back on January and February, so that was when I created a full base outline for the fic and started writing seriously, on and off, in between other stuff. The fics all had to be finished by a certain date back in September.

Big Bang events often also release the whole fic all at once, with each author posting on a scheduled release date. That's what I did for a separate Big Bang event fic, my Bingliushen Stardust AU "Catch a Falling Star", but I have noticed that authors seem to get fewer comments when the fic is released all at once and there's a higher chance of readers accidentally missing the entire fic. The Moshang BB23 mods allowed for a daily release schedule if so desired, and I decided that was a good compromise between a more spread-out release schedule and the rush of a Big Bang release schedule.

While the outline for "Servant to a Different King" was complete early in the year (I think it was 8,000 words long), containing the most basic beats and some vague ideas for more specific character moments, I was originally only planning for... okay, I knew from the beginning that the fic wasn't going to be only 5 chapters, but I had it sectioned into 5 "chapters" as the distinct division of situations (Moshang reuniting, Moshang being forced into the bodyguard situation, Moshang getting to know each other at the Underground Palace, Moshang in the Northern Desert, and Moshang back at the Underground Palace). Whenever I write a fic, I know that I'm going to discover a lot of the details as I go, especially exploring the flow of conversations, and in regards to what worldbuilding and background characters I end up adding for atmosphere and humor and thematic parallels.

The Big Bang event had check-ins to keep authors on track with a certain minimum word count expected by a certain date, which helped me monitor where I needed to be in my fic writing. I think I did most of my fic writing in the last couple of months, however, because I had finished posting the other fics I've done this year. This was why I was not really "active" for a couple months over the summer. If I'd been posting chapters on a weekly basis instead of daily, "Servant to a Different King" would have been like 4 months of fic.

I don't really think that I have good advice for "how to write a lot". I have a decent amount of free time and my responsibilities generally allow me to daydream about story plots while I'm working. I generally aim for 200 words a day, if I'm able, but I don't sweat about it. I have things set up so it's easy to share documents between my computer and my phone, so I think I ended up writing most of "Servant to a Different King" on my phone, which was a first for me, because the computer was just too distracting for my focus.

[tippenfunkaport]

WIPs Status Update

I am fairly confident no one cares what I am up to, but I haven't done one of these in ages so I figured I should.

In Progress Fanfic

Outlaws of the Whispering Woods

This fic is on temporary hiatus because I'm working on finishing it as part of the @wipbigbang. Participation in that event means I can't update that fic again until the posting period starts on September 8th BUT that once that posting period begins, I should have both art for the new chapter as well as regular updates through November until the fic is done which should be exciting. 

That said, there is still like 60k ish to go in that story so if it looks like I'm not going to be able to get it all done in time, I might swap it out for the Chipped Glimmer fic which has also been languishing in WIP hell because it's shorter and easier for me to get done on time. I'd prefer to use the event as a kick in the pants to finish OotWW, though, so we'll see.

Prince Glowyn the Fourth

This fic is 100% complete at last, I just have one chapter left to post and will be doing that sometime within the next week.

Going There

Just about four years after I started it, Going There is finally done as well! (Literally just finished it today!) "Done" in this case means I finally rewrote the back end and filled in the missing connecty bits I never wrote the first time so everything's written, it's just going to take me an unknown quantity of time to edit and post each of the chapters. But less time than rewriting it all took so I expect those last few updates to come fairly regularly once I get them started.

Coming Home

I have always said that I wanted to wait to continue this fic until Going There was done so now that I have finally finished it, the sequel can get my attention more regularly again. That said, with everything going on with the WIP Bang, posting the rest of Going There, running the Big Bang and posting my own Bang fic (plus, like, all the other IRL stuff i have to do this summer), I really don't anticipate getting it updated anytime before the fall at the earliest and even then who knows.

Also, because this is my last in-progress canon fic I'm not in a huge rush to get it out there, I'd rather take my time with it, so I'm fine with that timeline. It'll get updated when it gets updated.

Area First Ones

In my head, this is episodic and while i have five chapters written, I have some things I want to add in between so it's not as simple as just cleaning and posting those. So basically, this one will be one of those fics I update when I update here and there with no set timeline other than my whims.

Coming Soon!

My Big Bang fic is called Horse Girl Everyone and it's the long awaited Riding School AU! 

That one is going to be longgggg and basically never-ending and episodic (seriously, we're over 50k words and while Catradora have been circling each other for chapters Glimmer and Bow literally only just met and you KNOW how I feel about Glimbow). I was hoping to write enough in advance that I could do some kind of regular update schedule at the start but because I'm also running the Bang and having some annoying medical stuff going on, I think that's not happening.

I've written a ton in advance, don't get me wrong, I just don't see myself having time to revise it all and post weekly with everything else going on. But we'll see!

Anything else?

Well, yeah, lots of stuff but it's not fandom related so I can't tell you about it. ;-) Though maaaaybe I might have the chance for some of you to help me beta some of my original stuff in the near future if you're willing so keep an eye out for that.

I'm trying to have less things in progress at once so, though I have other fanfic projects in various states of completion, I'm purposely not going to even think about posting any other multi-chaps until GT and OotWW are done. 

One shots and shorts? Yeah, I'll be throwing those up randomly as the mood strikes, you know how I roll. I'm eyeing up the Domaystic 2024 prompts to see which ones call to me right now.

So I have other stuff planned for later but I'm not even going to tease it because we'll see how everything shakes out.

This year has actually been absolutely horrible health wise but weirdly productive writing wise so it's been a mixed bag but at least nice to get some stuff done!

[skzhua]

Hi! Sorry to bother again lol. I’m the Han obsessed girl lol. At it again with another request story cause my mind spirals but anyways I was thinking a forbidden love and sorta enemies to lovers so basically Han really wants to be with y/n but can’t cause of there differences and family issues etc and y/n pushes Han away cause she knows she likes him and all and basically angst and some fluff at the end? If that makes sense! - Sorry for the long request anyways Luv your work <3 (That’s why I keep coming back lol)

He's Not What He Seems to Be

MASTERLIST

Pairing: New CEO!Han Jisung x Rival!Female Reader, brief Lee Felix x Reader.

Genre: CEO!AU, forbidden love!AU, rivals-to-lovers, fluff, angst, slow burn.

Word Count: 19,435

Warnings: Swearing, insults, drinking, suggestive, mentions of sex but nothing too explicit, one mention of cheating. (proofread-ish)

A/N: I've been wanting to do a forbidden love kind of thing for a while, thank you! This is basically what I was already working on, but I changed it a bit so it could work for your request.

A/N 2: My longest fic so far! I love this story so much and put so much into it! I hope you'll enjoy it as much as I did when writing it.

one. - now -

"Has Miss L/N signed the papers yet?" the man asked your father, as if you weren't in the room already.

"She has not yet. We are to discuss our agreement before we commit to anything." your father answered politely.

"I see." the man, also known as Mr. Bang, breathed out. "I expect an answer until tomorrow night. We have our big announcement ceremony. I will be delighted to know you there."

Your father nodded politely before leaving the room while you stayed behind. As the door closed, you sent a glare to Mr. Bang. Upon seeing your reaction, he lets out a laugh.

"Chan, stop it." you rolled your eyes.

"Please, your father is so serious." he kept on laughing.

"If only he saw how you are out of office..." you mumbled in exasperation. "I think you becoming a CEO has only worsen your IQ."

He huffed in response. "Your company is nothing without mine, watch how you talk to me."

"Bruh..."

"Y/N, this is serious business!" he exclaimed.

"I know that, but I also know you are, first and foremost, my best friend. Plus, how did you talk about me just now? As if I'm some puppet who only gets to sign stupid papers."

He shook his head as he turned on his computer. "I was only joking."

"Yeah, well, my father didn't get that." you scoffed.

You went around his desk and leaned forward to see the statistics marked on his screen. You frowned when one number caught your attention. The Han technologies had risen significantly.

"I thought you said our new line of intelligent watches helped us beat the Han company." you commented.

"It did. For like a week." he sighed. "Your company is not doing so good, let me tell you."

The Bang family was a renowned one in the industry. Their ideas were always original and fresh, the public loved it. The Han were more traditional, but they managed to keep a great image since they kept on releasing new stuff all the time. Plus, their promoting team was a hard one to beat. And then, there was the L/N. You used to lead the technology brands with the Bang. However, with time, your ideas were not as impressive as they used to be. The Han family sued you for plagiarism a few years ago and this was a huge step back for your improvement. Luckily, Chan had recently taken his father's place as the CEO of Bang inc. and agreed on helping your company to increase your legitimacy. That was only because you two had studied together in college and grew to support one another.

"Isn't Han Jisung supposed to take the spot as their new chairman?" you asked when your eyes spotted his name on the screen.

"He gets promoted tomorrow morning."

You groaned in annoyance. "Does it mean he is going to be there at your night event?"

"Yes." he gave you a weak smile. "If it helps you to feel any better, he is only there to discuss business with us. You don't even have to address him a single word."

You scoffed again. "Trust me, I'll stay away from this guy. Why do you have business with him. anyway? I thought you were helping me!" you acted offended.

"Stop whining, Y/N. You're becoming CEO next year as well. See the following months as an opportunity to learn more about the industry." he patted your back.

You deadpanned at him, arms crossed. "You're so annoying."

"And that is why you love me." he faked a smile. "You should join your father before he asks me to marry you again."

Although your father thought the ideal solution to save the company was to marry you off to Chan, the latter had refused multiple times. You were his best friend, he would never take away such a big part of your life from you.

"Fair enough." you shrugged. "Don't forget to send me the papers, I'll sign them tonight."

"Yeah, yeah." he motioned his hand at you while his eyes were stuck on his computer. "See you tomorrow."

You joined your father outside, and there were already journalists surrounding him, asking him questions about your downfall and how he planned to save his company. You came to his rescue by telling them off and dragging your father behind to the car. Once in the vehicle, you asked the driver to bring you home.

"I really think you should marry Mr. Bang for our sake." he shot at you as the car started to move. "This would do great publicity and help us rise our sells."

"Well, it's a shame he doesn't want to propose to me." you sighed with a hint of playfulness in your voice.

"Y/N, be serious for once!" he nagged at you. "You've known the man for years and he is very respectful. I see no issue in a marriage."

You rolled your eyes at him. "I don't want to marry him, neither does he. He is already helping us a lot, it should be enough for now."

"And look at the results. This only made us beat the Han family for a week or so."

Not wanting to argue, you simply sighed loudly and looked out the window. You passed in front of the Han building and caught a slight glimpse of Han Jisung. Another thing you hated about the man was how good-looking he was. This was surely going to help him raise their numbers after he gets promoted.

Finally getting home, you rushed to your room to go wash up. Your day had been a hassle with the meetings with Chan, trying to act as if you haven't seen each other at your worst back in college. The moment you stepped in the shower, your phone went off. Glancing at the contact, you shrugged it off and declined. A few minutes into washing your hair, it went off again. With a groan, you hurried to rinse off the shampoo and soap that remained on your body.

Still damped, you answered rudely. "What?"

"Uh... Is this a bad timing? I thought you told me you'd be off work by now..." the voice on the other side spoke with uncertainty.

"I am at home, but couldn't you have waited five minutes?" you groaned.

"Jeez, my bad, L/N." Jisung chuckled. "Call me when you can?"

"No, I'm done already." you sighed as you started to dry yourself with the towel. "What do you want?"

"I'm nervous."

Yeah, you and Jisung weren't exactly as hateful towards one another as people thought you were. You hated him, yes, but only because he was an annoying child who would be constantly calling you to talk about anything. Other than that, he was a good friend of yours.

"You've been preparing for a whole ass year, you'll be fine." you softly reassured him.

"I still believe I need more time."

"If you want my opinion, you'll never feel ready. I can assure you that you are more than well-prepared for this position." you said before going back to your room.

"Are you going to be there tomorrow?"

You sighed heavily as you let yourself fall on your bed. "Yeah, but don't expect me to talk to you."

"I know." he said sadly.

There was a pause in the conversation. You took it as an opportunity to change into a more comfortable outfit since you wouldn't be going out until the morning after.

"You still there?" you heard through your phone.

You picked it up again and placed it on your ear. "Yeah."

"I- Do you think it's weird for me to want things to be different?" he breathed out.

You frowned. "What do you mean?"

"You hated me before, right?"

"Yeah..." you trailed off, even more confused. "I still do, honestly."

"Yeah, well not like you used to. And I hated you too."

"Just get to the point." you complained.

"Right." he coughed. "I wish we could have continued what happened last year."

two. - a year ago -

"You've got to be fucking kidding me." you cursed under your breath.

From afar, you saw your sworn enemy, Han Jisung, walk towards the baggage reclaim area, looking around for his own. You put on your sunglasses in hopes he wouldn't notice you. To your luck, he didn't as he seemed more preoccupied with finding his luggage.

You turned on your heels and walked away as fast as you could. In all of the places in the world, he had to be exactly where you were at for your little solo escapade. Add to that it was at the same time. You couldn't go back, this trip had cost you too much already.

"Well, well." you heard from behind. "If this isn't Miss L/N." he said in a cocky voice.

You shut your eyes closed before turning around, coming face to face with the man. "And if this isn't Mr. Too-Much-Ego-For-His-Own-Good." you faked a smile.

"I appreciate your worry about my ego, L/N, but I don't think it is necessary." he smirked at you. "Unless you actually have feelings under that pretty façade of yours."

It was your turn to send him a smirk. "I understand from what you said that you think I am pretty?"

His smile dropped. "You wish, princess."

With that, he left you in the middle of the airport as he headed towards the exit. Calling for a cab, he disappeared moments later. You could finally breathe a little. After making sure he wasn't around anymore, you went ahead yourself to get in a cab. You told the driver the location of the hotel you had reserved at, and it took him no time to drive away from the airport.

When you arrived, he was kind enough to help you with your bags before the valet took you in charge and brought them to your room. He led the way to the suite you had booked and made sure it was to your comfort before leaving. The sunlight was refreshing and the view as well compared to your house in the middle of the city back home. You walked to your balcony to take in the fresh air, letting yourself feel the warm breeze.

"Enjoying the view, L/N?"

Turning your head to your left, your eyes grew wider. This had to be a joke. There was no way he was in the room next to yours.

"Han." you muttered.

"I'm starting to think you are stalking me." he let out a laugh.

Even from his balcony that was a bit afar from yours, you could see the smug look plastered on his face. He was one hell of a jerk to be accusing you of such things, especially considering how much your families were against each other.

"I could say the same about you." you snorted.

"Don't expect this much from me, princess. If I wanted to pay attention to you, I would have done so way before."

How much you hated this pretty face of his. "Sure. Just don't bother my vacation." you huffed.

"You already ruined mine." he shot at you before walking back inside.

You soon did the same and rushed to get your phone, although you had promised yourself to not use it for the next two months of your getaway. In a hurry, you searched up Chan's contact and called him.

"I told you! You didn't even last an hour without your phone." he laughed as he answered.

"Han is here."

Chan said nothing, you could only hear his breath.

"Do you want to know the best?" you continued. "He's in the same fucking hotel in the room next to fucking mine."

"Oh." was all what came out of his mouth.

You grunted. "Thank you for the support, Bang."

"I'm sorry, Y/N, but this is kind of a lot to process." he chuckled awkwardly.

"Yeah, no shit..."

"Look, it can't be that bad! Just ignore him and he'll do the same. You two don't even look at each other during events, you can do the same now."

In a way, Chan was right. How bad could it be if the only thing you would do is go out in the sun and enjoy the beach? Sure, you were staying at the same hotel, but it didn't mean you were going to bump into each other every two seconds.

"Alright, I suppose it could have been worse. He just gets on my nerves so much."

"Ignore him and enjoy your trip, okay? I have to go now, but call me anytime."

"Thank you, Chan."

That night, you opted for having dinner at the restaurant in the lobby. From what you have heard, they served the best beef on Earth and there was no way you would miss your chance to taste it. You dressed in a casual attire, in contrary of your usual blazer you'd wear for work, and didn't even bother to look presentable. On this island in the middle of nowhere, who was going to recognize you anyway? Your cropped top with the skirt you picked definitely weren't going to be much of a problem.

The server offered for you to sit at their bar to taste their cocktails they offered along with the meat. You denied kindly and he assigned you to a single table near the window. From there, you had a perfect view of the sea and the sunset which were simply breathtaking. For the first time since your arrival, you finally felt at ease, which was exactly what you were going for. No stress, no pressure, just calmness.

"I'll have the flank steak with the potatoes, please." you ordered to the waiter, who took your menu after he noted it down.

The meal arrived not too long after. Taking a bite, you hummed from the taste, satisfied with the flavours. This was a perfect scenario; alone in the middle of nowhere eating the best food without anyone to bother you.

"Sorry ma'am." the waiter said, bringing a red drink in his hand. "The gentleman at the bar ordered this for you."

He left it on the table, making you almost blush. Not only was your night already perfect, but you could have your summer love at this instant. Your gaze moved to the counter with anticipation, until your smile was replaced by a glare.

"Are you being for real?" you scoffed, almost not believing what was happening.

"This is the most I have seen you in an entire day, Miss L/N." Han grinned, having the same drink as yours in his hand.

He left some money next to his plate before getting up and taking place on the seat in front of you. Your eyes followed his movements, daggers through them. He looked extremely handsome, more than usual. There was something about him wearing his shirt with a few buttons undone and neat jeans that had some sort of effect on you.

"What do you think you are doing?" you questioned, crossing your arms.

"I paid a beautiful lady a drink, what is so wrong with that?" he smirked.

Shaking your head in disbelief, you chuckled at him. "Are you seriously trying to flirt with someone you cursed at in public for the last month or so?"

He shrugged his shoulders as he took a sip of the red liquor. "This is in no way a professional setting, I'm allowing myself to let it loose. It might be something you should consider doing as well, princess."

"As if." you let out a laugh.

"I'm serious. Other than work, I don't see a reason for hating you at this moment. When you think about it, right now, we are two respectably office workers who are simply on a break on this beautiful island."

A playful smiled appeared on your face slowly. "You are right, Han. Maybe we could put our work aside for the following weeks."

You took this as a way to avoid awkward interactions, but mostly, it would avoid him shooting insults at you for the time being. If you were going to be seeing him regularly, might as well make a truce to be able to enjoy your stay.

"I didn't expect you to be agreeing with me." he tilted his head to the side. "How long are you staying anyway?"

"Two months."

He let out a hum. "Same as me."

"Great." you muttered.

Finally feeling the need of a drink, you took a sip of the one Han bought you. Your stare stayed cold as he observed your gestures. His eyes were almond round, but there was this intimating hint in them that you couldn't quite put a finger on. You were visibly both still on the edge. However, it was somehow more tolerable than usual.

He raised his glass towards you and you copied his move. "What are we toasting for?" you raised an eyebrow.

He grinned at you. "To us, two known rivals who bury the hatchet for two months."

"To us."

Cling.

three. - eleven months and three weeks ago -

The first week had passed by so fast. Although you had planned to do so many things, you had barely gone outside. Unlike what you originally thought, you were not able to get away from work as easily. With a couple of calls here and there, signing documents to confirm shipments and others, you had little time to go out and enjoy the weather.

"What did I tell you?" Chan sighed, video calling you from his office. "I thought this was to forget about work."

"I know, I know." you groaned while rummaging through the clothes you packed. "I promise, today, I'll do nothing else but go to the beach and take a dip in the sea."

"Yeah, if you can find your bathing suit." he held in a laugh as he watched you struggle. "I'd offer to help, but I am eight hours away from you."

"Oh, wow, Channie." you turned to look at your phone. "I didn't know, I'm so glad to know you wanted to help still."

"Drop the attitude." he rolled his eyes. "You should be enjoying the sun instead of talking to me."

"You're my only source of entertainment since I got here, my bad." you held your hands up in defense. "Though I'm sure you have a lot of work right now, so I'll leave you be."

"Good plan. Have a good first day of vacation!" he waved before hanging up, not letting you say it back.

"This asshole." you mumbled to yourself.

Finally getting a hold of your bikini, you changed into it and wore a long summer dress over it so you could easily remove it once at the beach. You packed a tube of sunscreen, sunglasses, sandals, a bottle of water, and a book to spend the time.

You got there in a matter of minutes since your hotel was so close to the shore. There were already a lot of people, but you managed to find a spot a bit further where you could have some peace. There was a long chair installed with a parasol and a small table, so you placed your things, laying them out neatly, before you removed your dress. You were about to put on your sunscreen, until you heard a whistle from your left. Looking for the source of the sound, your eyes laid on a man. He wasn't so old, but he was visibly way older than you.

"Hi, Miss." he presented himself politely. "My name is Ko Sangwook."

"Okay." you said nonchalantly.

"And you are?"

"Annoyed you came here to bother me." you snapped at him. "If your way of flirting is whistling at a woman because you saw her at the beach in a bathing suit, I can understand why you are still looking for someone at your age."

"I-" he started, but you raised your hand up to stop him.

"I came here to relax and enjoy the view, so if you don't mind, it'll be very appreciated if you leave me alone."

"I didn't mean to-"

"I know what you meant." you cut him off again. "But like I said, I'd like to be left alone, thank you."

His shoulders dropped in defeat before he turned on his heels and walked back to where he previously was. Satisfied, you went back to putting on the cream on your arms. As you thought you had finally some tranquility, you heard someone clapping their hands slowly as they approached you. You immediately knew who it was.

"I almost interfered but I might say, you are rather good at handling such situations, L/N." he commented as he continued to clap.

You gave him a polite smile. "I'd usually tell you to fuck off, but in the context of the vacation, I'll gladly thank you."

Han snickered as he approached you. "You are very welcome."

He, himself, was in his swimming shorts with a loose white t-shirt and sunglasses that were pushing his hair back. This was a much different look from what you had seen him wear before and it was surely the first time you noticed the muscles he had through the fabric.

"Did you get here early?" you asked, now rubbing your legs with the cream.

He was checking you out, there was no doubt. However, the attention you were receiving was the least of your worries. Instead, you tried to focus on smoothing the white of the sunscreen.

"No, I got here about fifteen minutes ago. If I'm being honest, Miss L/N, I expected to be crossing your way sooner than today."

"I had issues to attend to." you responded, keeping it brief.

He dared to sit next to you as he saw you struggle to do your shoulders. Taking the tube from your hands, he squirted a certain amount and gave you a look as to ask for your permission. You nodded slowly and he started to rub your back gently, applying where you couldn't reach.

"Let me guess." he continued the conversation. "Work?"

"Precisely." you answered, suddenly not so focused as you felt his hands massage your shoulders. "I couldn't leave the paperwork to the staff, they would have messed it up."

"I see." he hummed.

To your disappointment, he was already done with putting on your sunscreen and he got up, rubbing his hands together with the remaining of it.

"Enjoy your day, princess." he said before he walked the opposite way from you.

You let out a huff, your brain trying to process the last couple of minutes. You shook it off. This was Han being polite, nothing more. Thus, you picked up your book and started to read, a way to change your mind. It didn't work. Your eyes kept drifting to where the blond-haired man was. Now totally shirtless, it was way harder to ignore his figure. One hell of a man he was.

four. - now -

You coughed, not knowing what to respond to him. He seemed to notice your discomfort as he immediately tried to justify himself, although you already knew what he was referring to.

"I mean, back when we could be casual with each other without worrying about... Well, not casual, but at ease?"

"I get it, Jisung." you said, pinching in-between your eyes. "Listen, I'm sure tomorrow will go wonderful for you. This is what you've been working for all of these years, no?"

There was hesitation in his voice as he answered. "It is, you are right."

"Alright... I have to go now, I have a big day tomorrow, and so do you."

"Yeah..." he mumbled. "Thank you, Y/N."

"Good night, Han." you hung up.

Burying your face in your hands, you recalled the previous year. So much had happened since then, you didn't know why you kept secretly befriending the enemy. This was wrong, in all aspects.

"Miss L/N." you heard from your door. "I have your laundry. What do you want me to do with it?"

You opened the door to meet eyes with the sweet Jeongin, your assistant slash butler. "Innie, be casual with me." you chuckled.

"I would but your dad is, like, staring at me." he whispered to you, which made you laugh.

"I'll just take these from you." You then noticed another piece of clothing that did not belong to you while you took the pile of clean shirts from him. "What is this?"

"Ah." he exclaimed before holding it higher for you to see. "Mr. Bang told me about tomorrow, so I thought I could shop something for you. Don't be mad, I just thought you wouldn't have the time."

Analyzing the gown, you grinned from ear to ear. It was a beautiful silk red dress with a long skirt that seemed to be flowing even though the man holding it was barely moving. You noticed it had pockets and it only made you love it even more. If anything, Jeongin had the best taste in terms of clothing.

"It's okay, Jeongin. I love it."

"I knew you would." he smiled with you and gave it to you. "Sleep well." he waved.

"You too."

The next day, you woke up with the worst headache. You would have taken the day off, if it wasn't for the agreement you still had to sign with Chan. The guy forgot to send you the papers, and so had you forgotten to remind him. Both of you were so smart, but when put together, it was a disaster.

You walked in his office, a coffee in hand and eyebags taking half of your face, and then slumped on the chair in front of his desk. He gave you a suspicious look, but didn't bother questioning you when he spotted the box of doughnuts in your other hand.

"Is this for me?" he asked excitedly.

You yawned loudly while nodding your head, dropping the box in front of him. "I got the caramel thingy you love so much."

"You're the best." he smiled at you. "I can't eat them yet, though. We have some stuff to sign, my dear."

With a groan, you grabbed a pen laying on his agenda and straightened your posture, ready to sign. He took out a document out of a file and started to read out the conditions. There were basic ones, such as the percentage of gain for each party and the duration of the contract.

"Yeah, yeah, I know all of this already, we wrote it together." you whined, growing impatient.

"Sorry for following proper protocol, Mrs. I-Am-Still-Asleep." he rolled his eyes at you.

"Headache." you answered. "Where do I sign?"

He pointed you a few places while turning the pages. "And here."

"This feels like I'm committing to a marriage." you grumbled.

He stopped his motion and sent you a glare. "Y/N, please focus."

"Sorry."

You eventually signed everything and Chan made a copy for you. He kept his in a folder before putting it away in his drawer. Business was easy with him, you liked it.

You yawned once more as you put the paper in your briefcase. "My father will be happy this is finally done."

"I suggest you take a nap with some pills before tonight, you don't look too good." he pointed out with a raised eyebrow.

"Can I just crash on your couch?" you motioned the sofa in the corner of his office.

He shrugged. "Sure, but a heads up, Han is coming in a like thirty minutes."

Your eyes widened. "Uh?"

"We have a couple of things to get cleared up before tonight. It won't be long, I promise. You tolerated him for two months last year, you can handle an hour or so."

Did you handle the two months? You begged to differ.

five. - eleven months ago -

Avoiding Han was easier when going to a different beach, further away from the one next to the hotel. It required you more transport, but the episode of the sunscreen left you traumatized almost. It was primordial for it to not occur again.

However, there was so much you could do to not meet him again. Tonight, the hotel was organizing a night on the beach for dancing and partying. You were still a woman in your 20s, there was no way you would be missing out on this. That also meant Han wasn't going to skip it either.

The moment you stepped foot on the sand, you saw him. He was discussing with a lady at the bar. Dressed in a short-sleeved buttoned shirt that was clearly too loose for him, he matched it with ripped jeans shorts and a silver chain around his neck. The woman with him was the definition of a popular girl you would meet in high school. Blond hair that matched his, bralette that enhanced the forms of her breast and a skin way too perfect to be real.

You had dressed up for the occasion as well. Although you had more self-preservation than her, you had picked a V shaped top with yet another one of your skirts. This one was longer and the fabric flooded perfectly as you walked. You went close to where he was sitting, ordering a margarita for yourself.

"Excuse me for a moment." he said, bowing apologetically to the lady.

Slowly, he made his way to you. You wondered where in this mind of his he thought talking to you was more worth it than speaking with the hot chick he had just abandoned.

"I would have never thought of you as one for the margaritas." he stated when the drink was placed in front of you.

"And I would have never guessed you liked bimbos." you replied with a knowing smile. "Known to break hearts, Han?"

He chuckled as he shook his head. "I used to be a wild teenager, I have to admit that."

"Not a surprise." you shrugged and drank your cocktail.

"How were you?" To this, you frowned at him. "In high school, I mean."

Looking up, you started to roll your memories from then in your head. "More reasonable and responsible than you were, I'd say."

"There is no doubt." he let out a laugh. "You dated Mr. Bang, didn't you?"

You froze at his words. For an instant, he reminded why you hated his family. They would never mind their own business and were constantly asking around for the gossip. This came to their advantage, they were known to expose the fraud within the industry.

"Is this why he's saving your ass from when my father sued yours?"

"Weren't you the one who wanted to bury the hatchet?" you said in a challenging voice.

"My apologies, princess." he snickered. "Curiosity got the best of me."

You turned your attention back on the drink in your hands. "I never dated Chan. I didn't even know him back in high school."

"It doesn't look like your relationship is platonic. I'm sure you are aware of what is said in the medias about the two of you."

You instantly got what he meant by that. "There is no marriage arrangement." you simply replied. "Did it answer your questions?"

"It did." he affirmed, now taking a sip of his own alcoholic liquor.

You considered you'd had enough of the conversation. By then, you had drawn a good image of what the Han family were discussing among themselves, and to no surprise, it was pure bullshit. You chugged the rest of your margarita and the shot of tequila you ordered along with it. Wincing at the strong taste, you put the glass down before walking towards the dance floor. Han stopped you.

Sending him a roll of your eyes, you smacked his hand away from your arm. "Am I not allowed to go have fun? Do I need the permission of the great Han Jisung?"

"I was simply about to ask you to dance with me."

You scoffed. "After your stunt about my personal life? I don't think so."

You found yourself moving along the music alone, soon then joined by another young man. From afar, you saw that Han had gone back to flirting with the big boobed girl from earlier. Good for him, he seemed to be lacking some action. As for the boy dancing with you, he was rather attractive. You grew to learn that his name was Felix and that he came from Australia. He was also a young wealthy man who was looking for a getaway from the toxicity of the business. It seemed to be a common pattern for most people like you.

"I see you know my mate, Jisung." he told you when he brought you afar from the noise, walking along the water.

You glanced back to Han's direction as he was moving with the blondie, her ass grinding on him. "He's nothing more than a mere acquaintance."

"Oh." Felix nodded his head. "I apologize, it seemed like more from where I watched the two of you."

You huffed, not believing a word he was saying. "We're rivals. If anything, I despise him."

He laughed at your words. "Hard feelings?"

You shook your head. "Not him in particular, his family in general." you breathed out before stopping to look at the small waves. "This is beautiful."

"It truly is."

A slight smile crept its way on your mouth. "The stars look like the freckles on your face."

He let out a chuckle. "You're a romantic?"

"When the man who keeps me company is to my liking, yes." you flirted.

This was definitely the alcohol speaking, but Felix was good-looking. You were not going to beat yourself for having an interest in him.

"I take it as in you appreciate my presence." he said in a soft tone, taking a step closer to you.

As he was now hovering you, you felt your heart pounding. "Good assumption." you whispered.

Carefully, he leaned in to meet your lips with his. He was undeniably an excellent kisser and he knew what he was doing. He eventually poked your lips with his tongue, asking for permission to slide it in yours. You let your mouth agape and went on to make out sensually. He slowly moved his hands from your waist to your ass which made you gasp at the contact.

"Sorry." he mumbled.

"Don't be." you breathed out heavily.

You moved your lips down his throat, moving to the muscle in-between his neck and his shoulder. It was his turn to let out a groan, making him grasp tighter on your ass cheeks.

"You want to do this here?" he grunted, still in shock from your sucking on his skin.

"We can take this to my room, unless you can't wait." you said in a moan.

Without another word, he grabbed your hand and ran back to the hotel. On the way there, you exchanged glances with Han. He had the woman all over him, but he didn't seem to enjoy it as much as he should. Instead, his eyes were dark as he followed your figure running to the building. You would have questioned it, but Felix picking you up bridal style quickly shifted your thoughts elsewhere.

When the doors of the elevator closed, Felix's lips were back on yours and his hands were, again, fondling your butt. Too immersed in the moment, you didn't think twice as you removed his shirt. He was stunned by your action, especially because you were still in public technically, but he didn't fight back. Your eyes directly went to his abdominal muscles, leaving your mouth open.

"I think it was a good idea to work out again for my part." he chuckled.

"Definitely."

Next thing you know, you're in your room with an Australian cutie on top of you. It was good, excellent you dared to think, but that was it. A one-night stand, nothing more.

When waking up, you felt horrible for not seeing him more than that. He was even prettier in the sunlight, but it was just that. He slowly woke up, grunting while stretching his arms out.

"Hey." he waved at you cutely. "Good morning."

"Hey." you waved back as you sit up. "Last night was nice." you commented, and he nodded in agreement.

"It was." he said, but seemed hesitant. Lifting his body up to lean on his elbows, he looked at you. "I didn't... feel it, though."

You let out a groan of relief. "Thank God, because me neither."

He laughed. "It was really good, though." he trailed off.

He lifted his hand up to the back of your neck and pulled you close to his face. Kissing him was hot, he didn't leave room for it to be an innocent gesture. He moved slowly to press your body down on the bed as he turned to be on top of you.

"You're so fucking hot." he almost growled.

As you felt him suck in your neck, you moaned at the sensation from the contact. "Same for you." you managed to spill out.

He backed away a little and stared right back into your eyes. "I don't mind keeping contact as a friend, but I'd love if we can keep doing this."

"Agreed." you quickly answered before bringing him back to the crook of your neck, already in need of feeling him.

"Fuck, so eager." he rasped out, leaving a couple of sloppy kisses along your throat. "You're into morning sex, aren't you?

"You talk too much." you groaned, going back to kissing him.

His phone went off. It distracted you for a second, but you rapidly went back to business as Felix started to massage your thigh. He was about to go further, when the ringtone went off again. With a loud sigh, he separated his body from yours and went to pick up his device. Answering, he still kept touching you, leaving you vulnerable in all ways.

"Yes?"

"Felix, I get L/N is hot, but try to keep quiet?" you heard Han say through the phone.

Felix stopped touching you as a frown made its way on his face. "What do you mean?"

"My room is next to hers, I can hear you two fuck."

A blush crept on your cheeks, both from embarrassment and anger. Did he really have the guts to listen to you in such an intimate moment?

"Well, don't listen?" Felix replied in a small voice.

"Trust me, I would, but you two are loud as fuck and the walls are thin like paper."

That meant you would have heard him if he slept with the girl, but you didn't. You couldn't get why this reassured you.

"Alright, sorry." Felix breathed out, passing a hand through his silver locks. "Are you still up for shopping later?"

"Yeah, for sure. Meet me there at 11?"

You looked at the clock and it was already 9.

"Yes. See you there, mate." He hung up and gave you an apologetic smile. "I'm so sorry."

You shrugged. "I'm here for another month or so, we can definitely do this again."

He gave you a satisfied smirk. "I'll wait. But for now, how do you feel about working you up a little?"

You huffed. "I'm definitely keeping you around just for that."

Minutes later, you were even more of a mess than the previous night as you let out uncontrollable gasps and moans. Felix did take care of you afterwards, making you a coffee from the machine in the corner of the room.

"You seem to have a lot of experience." you complimented as you took the mug he gave you.

He shook his head. "Not so much, actually. I recently broke up with my now-ex fiancée."

You winced at the thought before drinking your coffee. "I'm so sorry."

"It's nothing. I caught her cheating and it wasn't the first time."

"That's even worse..." you mumbled.

"It is. It sucked a lot. It's one of the reasons why I needed to leave Australia for a bit, change scenery."

"Understandable really." you nodded.

"What about you? How come are you in the middle of nowhere with your hotel suite right next to your so-called enemy?" he questioned.

You rolled your eyes, already annoyed at the simple thought of him. "Pure coincidence, really. We did agree to put all of it aside for the time of the vacation, but he does get on my nerves a lot."

"Jisung can be insufferable, I'll give you that." he laughed. "But he's not that bad. In fact, he might me among the few real people I've met here. And trust me, I've talked to almost everyone in this hotel."

You shook your head while laughing with him. "I have no doubt he is, but we'll never get along. It's like that and always has been."

"If you say so."

six. - ten months and three weeks ago -

You hooked up one more time with Felix before he had to fly back to his home country. Promising each other to keep contact, you watched him leave the hotel after he hugged you tightly.

"Already missing your boo?" Han joked.

He had tagged along with sending Felix off with you, much to your displeasure. This was the first time you saw him again after the party at the beach.

"I'm sure he told you it was purely platonic." you spat out before heading back inside.

"I'm kidding." he said in a much softer tone as he ran to catch up with your speed. "Are you coming to the bonfire tonight?"

You lifted an eyebrow at him. "There is a bonfire?"

"Yeah, another thing the hotel is hosting."

You shrugged your shoulders. "I suppose I can go check it out."

"I'll be there if you want to join me."

You chuckled at him. "If it's to watch you with bimbo girl again, no thanks."

To this, a smirk slowly appeared on his face. "Jealous much, princess?"

You wanted to punch him. "Of course, I would totally be heartbroken to see you rub your dick against a fake booty." you exclaimed in a sarcastic way.

He deadpanned at you. "I get the point, L/N."

"Then you understand I'll most likely not be joining you tonight."

"I'm the only person you know here apart from Felix. And since he just left, you have no other option than sticking with me."

"Logical, indeed." you replied. "Alright, I suppose I could use some company, although I doubt you'll be able to entertain me much, Mr. Han."

"You'll see."

You had finally reached your suites by then. Thus, he walked inside while not forgetting to send a wink your way. You felt your face getting warmer as you went in your own.

With a deep breath to shake it off, you walked to your luggage in order to inspect the few articles of clothing that would be appropriate for tonight. Your dresses were either too tight or you had already wore a couple of them. There was no way you were going to show up in pants. Then, you spotted a pair of short shorts with a tight tank top laying next to it. Your mind worked as it figured if it would be a good outfit as you imagined it with your oversized knitted cardigan. This seemed to work.

A few hours went by and you had chosen to add a few necklaces to add to your look. Boringly staring at the television in front of your bed, you didn't notice it was nearing the start of the bonfire. With a loud pounding at your door, you let out an annoyed grunt before answering and letting the man in.

"You look rather lovely." he commented.

His clothing wasn't different from usual, apart from the sleeveless shirt he had on that made his arms look very fit. His hair was in a messier state that what you had seen before but it fitted him well.

"And you look like some fuckboy." you responded and he huffed at you. "May you lead the way, please?"

"Sure, ma'am."

He didn't wait for you. He didn't even look back at you as he left to head towards the elevator. Not wanting for him to close the doors in your face, you hurried to join him with a little sprint. You truly asked yourself why you hadn't chopped his head yet.

"So courteous of you." you joked, already out of breath from your running.

"I try to be." he said with the same damn smug look he always had on. "Stamina is not your forte?"

"I don't have time for maintaining these types of things."

The elevator opened and, this time, he extended his arm out for you to hold on. Reluctantly, you gripped onto it before he started to walk towards the beach. Well, towards the bar. Now you were really wondering how he hadn't had a harsh hangover yet.

"Shall I buy you a margarita?" he asked as you were getting closer to the barman.

"Sex on the beach."

"Freaky." he hummed, resulting to you giving him a punch on the stomach with your elbow.

He grunted at the contact, but didn't say more. He left you alone as he went to order your drinks. In the meantime, you watched the young adults partying near the already growing fire. You didn't think you would be experiencing something like this again after college, even less after you entered your father's company. Frankly, this was the first time you went to social events like these.

"Here." Han held out the cocktail to you while drinking his own. "I haven't had a sex on the beach in years. You've got good taste, L/N."

You chuckled. "I stick to what I know, that's all." you shrugged.

You began to walk again but in a slower pace to not spill out the liquids in your possession. Much to your excitement, you spotted a group of three men sitting on logs in a small circle as one played the guitar. Not even consulting Han first, you made your way to them. Although your sudden change of direction took him by surprise, he followed you as you greeted the young men.

"Good evening." you waved and one of them smiled at you brightly. "I'm Y/N, and this is my..." you paused for an instant, searching for what you should be calling him.

"We're business partners." Han finished for you. "I'm Han Jisung."

The guy holding the guitar opened his eyes wide at the mention of the name. "As in the future chairman of Han techs?" he questioned, to which Han nodded. "You had a brief time in the music industry, am I wrong?"

This took you by surprise, especially when you saw Han acquiesce. The man, who later introduced himself as Seungmin, told him he followed his platform back then and had been trying to learn the guitar for a while. You watched your companion of the evening sit next to him as he explained the chords and more. You had never seen him speak with such passion, it was almost attractive. The simple fact he knew how the play the guitar would have been good enough for you to be interested if he wasn't Han Jisung.

"And you're Y/N L/N of the L/N Corporation?" the guy sitting next to Seungmin asked.

"That's me." you said before sitting down next to him.

"I'm Changbin, and this is my friend Minho."

You bowed at him as he waved at you kindly. He focused back on watching Seungmin and Han interact.

"I'm surprised to see you with a Han, I thought your families didn't have the greatest relationship." Changbin stated.

"We didn't intend to be coming here at the same time." you briefly explained. "I wouldn't be around him in normal circumstances."

"I believe you, don't worry." he laughed.

"I heard you wanted to release more music." Seungmin said to Han who was the one holding the instrument now.

He chuckled awkwardly as he tuned the strings. "I won't be able to do that anymore."

"Why not?" you asked.

His head shot up to look back at you. There was glistening in his irises, which was probably the reflection of the fire. He sent you a knowing smile.

"Work." he responded simply, his eyes still on you.

It was as if this simple word meant a thousand things. There was something you couldn't understand in his tone, but you got one part right; he gave up music for the company.

"Play something."

Startled by your request, he blinked a couple of times before letting out a quiet cough. "I'm sure I'm rusty."

"Please." Seungmin insisted. "It'd be great to hear you perform acoustically."

Sighing in defeat, he adjusted his posture. Placing his fingers correctly, he frowned as concentration took over. Then, he strummed the strings which left a beautiful sound. It sounded oddly familiar, but you let him play. Just when you thought he couldn't have amazed you more, he started to sing. Now, in a normal context, you'd say you fell in love right there and then. But it's Han Jisung. So, you were being content with simply enjoying the melody for now. He was talented, that was evident, but you would never say it in his face.

He sang the outro of the song with his gaze on yours. He noticed the pink appearing on your face and he didn't want to assume he was the one making you feel like this. Embarrassed, you looked at the bottom of your glass that was already empty. Han ended the song beautifully and the boys clapped their hands.

"Thank you, J.One." Seungmin snickered as he patted Han's back.

It hit you. The familiarity you had with the track was because it was one on your playlist, credited by J.One.

"You're that rapper dude who sometimes sings that I keep hearing on the radio?" you exclaimed in total shock.

As shocked by your words as you were, he nodded. "My father doesn't know. Please, Y/N, I beg you to not tell him."

Y/N... it sounded pretty coming out of his mouth. Without even knowing, you did grow familiar to one another since the beginning of this vacation. It was only a matter of time before you dropped the honorifics, such as calling each other by your last name.

"I won't." you smiled at him.

This was the first genuine smile he got from you that was actually directed to him. His heart skipped a beat. He wished he had seen it before, it made you glow.

"Thank you." he said softly.

As he stared between the two of you, Minho coughed to break the moment. "How about we join the actual party?" he prompted and the others stood up as to agree with his suggestion.

Changbin offered you a hand, but you kindly declined. "Are you sure?" he raised an eyebrow.

"I'm sure, thank you. I'll join you all later.'

"If you say so." he shrugged before running to Seungmin and Minho.

Han, however, was still at the same spot on the log with the guitar laying next to him. He watched the gathering around the fire and sighed loudly. You gave him a curious look, but didn't dare to ask what was on his mind. It wasn't your place to do so. As if he would be telling you anyway.

"We have three weeks left." he said no one in particular, his stare still on the dancing people. "It goes by so fast."

"It does." you affirmed. "I can't wait to be back home, though. It can get lonely here."

"I'm here." he pointed out.

"I wouldn't call you an enjoyable presence."

He winced, faking to be hurt by your words. "I can't blame you. Still hurts."

"You'll get over it, whiny boy." you shook your head in exasperation.

Another silence took over. Rather than wanting to shoot yourself for having him around, it almost felt like you were at home. His presence alone, whether you liked it or not, was comforting.

"For real, though." he spoke again. "I don't want to go back."

"Why not?"

He moved his stare towards you. "You know why."

You shrugged. "It was our fate since the day we were born."

"Exactly." he snapped. "All of our life is already planned in every way even before we can speak. I didn't ask to work for my dad, and I surely didn't decide on hating you."

For the first time, you heard him out. You were listening to the real Han Jisung. In a way, you had to agree with him; life within a world like yours wasn't easy. People were expecting so much of you, the pressure was constant. In all honesty, you thought Han was used to this lifestyle and actually enjoyed it. You were proven wrong.

"If I'm being truthful, I would have never hated you in the first place." he continued. "I mean, I have no valid reason."

You felt a lump form in your throat. "You know your father will kill you for even addressing me like this."

"Like what?" he cocked his head to the side.

"So casually..." you murmured.

He laughed a little. "You're quite the only here who can relate to what I'm going through. I'm simply taking the opportunity to rant, that's all."

"We are rivals, Han."

"Jisung."

You blinked twice. "Pardon me?"

"Call me Jisung, please."

You nodded, uncomfortable by his request. "Well, Jisung, while we are at it, should I complain as well?"

He gestured to you. "Be my guest."

"Okay..." you breathed in. "I wish I could hang out with Chan like we used to back in college. Ever since he got to his new role, I barely see him out of his office."

He hummed as you talked. "Right, Bang..." he trailed off. "You really love him, don't you?"

You frowned at him. "He's a close friend, yeah. Probably the only one I have, to be honest."

He broke into laughter. "I'm sorry, Y/N, but this is kind of sad."

"Who are you to say that? The only friend I am aware you have is Felix Lee." you scoffed.

He suddenly went back to his serious face, now sending you a glare. "I hate you."

"Breaking news." you said sarcastically.

"It was a joke." he snorted. "I literally just told you I don't really."

You realized you didn't get that this was what he had insinuated when he said he wouldn't hate you if it wasn't for his family. Thinking about it now, you also couldn't pinpoint a good argument on why you couldn't get along. Frankly, you had every aspect to be bonding: both heirs of grand companies, both pressured by the public, and both on a vacation to run away from it all. Adding the fact he was able to keep your holiday interesting in a way, he was fine really.

"I don't hate you either."

This seemed to take him by surprise. "You don't?"

You shook your head as a no. "I grew up hating your family, I naturally assumed you are as much of an asshole. I mean, you are, but in a nice way."

"Thank you?" he said, sounding more like a question. "I don't agree with most of what they are doing. I would rather be doing my music than working for them."

You chuckled. "I would have never guessed you are J.One."

"Well, I don't go around telling people. I'm surprised Seungmin knew, he must have been following my stuff for a while."

Talking about him, Seungmin had ran back to you. Taking your hands in his, he forced you up to go join the others. You argued you didn't feel like partying, but gave in eventually. Soon after, it was Jisung's turn to get fetched by Minho. Changbin had bought some beers for you all and you jammed to the music as you drank and enjoyed the warmth of the fire. At some point, you didn't notice how, but Jisung was casually swirling you around in a messy manner, the sand not cooperating with the stability of his feet. As for you, you were laughing uncontrollably for pretty much nothing as he kept guiding your body along the beats coming from the speakers. You hadn't had this much fun in a while, it felt amazing.

To your disappointment, the night came to an end. People dispersed on the beach as they regrouped in smaller crowds. Not much dancing was happening. You saw most of them heading back to the hotel, Minho and Seungmin among them. Changbin stayed behind as to make sure you and Jisung were doing okay. The man had one too many drinks, but you were surprisingly able to walk in a straight line still.

"Is he always like this?" Changbin laughed as Han tripped over his own feet again.

"I wouldn't know." you snickered with him. "But I'll have to admit, he's kind of cute being all lost and shit."

"I heard that!" Jisung smirked, now standing.

He clumsily joined you and slumped his arm around your small figure to get some balance. "Easy there." you laughed out.

"I'm fine."

Changbin helped you bring him to his room as you laid him on his bed. He argued with you that he didn't need to be taken care of, but the way he stood on the mattress told you otherwise. You assure Changbin that you could handle him from then on and he left the two of you alone, doubt still plastered on his face.

"Do you need anything?" you asked the drunk man as he attempted to walk up to you.

"I need you with me." he pouted which was too adorable for your liking.

"I'm already here with you."

In response, he grabbed your arm and dragged you to his bed along with him. Though he tried to do it carefully, he pushed you under the convers and tucked you in as if you were a toddler. You didn't fight back.

"I meant to stay with me for tonight." he grinned before going into the blankets next to you. "Do you like Felix?"

The abrupt change of topic caught you by surprise. Slowly, you moved your gaze to him as questions popped in your head. Was he in his right mind?

"I think he's a great guy, yeah." you responded although you were quite lost.

"He was a good fuck?"

You slapped him across his chest. "This is so inappropriate."

He scoffed. "Is it? I heard your moans for hours that night. Consider yourself lucky I only complained once."

"Were you listening all along? You pervert..."

You could not see his face due to the lack of lighting, but you could easily tell he was rolling his eyes at you. "Not intentionally." he sighed. "But quite honestly, I hated hearing you scream his name."

"Was I that annoying?" you joked.

"No, the opposite."

To this, you stood up from the pillow under your head and tried to find his eyes within the darkness. With the little light coming from the moon, you made out his features and saw some sort of sadness. If you weren't confused before, you definitely were now.

"Sorry, what?" you whispered.

It was his turn to get up from the mattress until his face was to your level. He put his hand up to your face, hesitant, but placed it to the side of your head in the end.

"If you haven't figured it out yet, L/N..." he started but stop when his breath got caught in his throat.

He was nervous. You could tell.

"What didn't I figure out?" you asked softly.

Your breathing wasn't doing any better than his. It was oddly uneven while you were almost shaking from how vulnerable he made you feel. Stroking the apple of your cheeks, he took a deep breath.

"I like you."

seven. - now -

"A pleasure, Mr. Bang." Han bowed to your friend.

You were still on the couch. While people would immediately think you were napping, you were more awake than ever. The simple sound of his voice was enough to make you fall asleep on a usual basis, but you felt like it could not keep you more conscious at the moment.

"The feeling is reciprocated." Chan bowed as well. "I apologize for Miss L/N sleeping in my office. We had some paperwork this morning and she didn't get much sleep."

Han hummed. "Not surprising considering her reputation."

It stung. Jisung would be the most caring and soft person when you would be alone together. But when put in a situation where a scandal would break if they ever say you interact with your supposed competitor, he was a totally different person. His words were harsh with no feeling. He was like the Han Jisung you used to despise so much.

"What reputation, may I ask?" Chan asked.

"Has she not been seen out with many gentlemen these past few months?"

He was referring to you father's selection of potential husbands he had forced you to go on dates with.

Chan let out an amused chuckle. "You're assuming she spent the night with them?"

"I'm simply talking about what is said."

Chan paused. How much you wished to open your eyes to see how he was reacting.

"Shall we jump to business, Mr. Han?" he changed the subject.

"Right." he coughed. "I apologize."

"I'd have to say congratulations for your new position."

"Thank you very much, I only hope I can be as great of a man as my father was."

"I know the feeling." Chan sighed.

They started to discuss new arrangements and all. You did doze off to sleep eventually, though it took you a while as you were trying to ignore the mixed feelings you had from when Jisung was bad mouthing you. An hour later, Chan woke you up, telling you he was alone now and that you should get home to get ready for the evening.

"Can I crash at your place?" you pouted.

"Y/N..." he said in a stern voice.

"Your bed is much more comfortable!" you argued. "And I don't want to face my dad. I bet he'll be talking to me about the important figures we'll see tonight and I am in no mood to listen to him."

He shook his head. "I have to get ready myself, I'm sorry. I promise I'll be sticking to you like glue for the entire ceremony, though."

"Oof." you made a face. "That's a tough promise you're making there, Mr. Bang. Plus, I know you'll have to speak with Han again. Don't involve me in this."

He let out an exasperate sigh. "What is it with you two? It's as if the hate sky rocked since last summer. What even happened there for you two to be so... disgusted by the other?"

Your mouth went agape. Staring at him blankly, you didn't know what to say. As much as you had tried to hide your relationship that was far from hatred, maybe you had overdone it.

"What are you talking about?"

He sighed again, visibly irritated by your cluelessness. "You know, Y/N. You always talk about him and throw whatever insult that comes to your mind. You didn't even leave just now when I told you he was coming."

Yeah, Chan definitely knew.

"Nothing happened last year."

"Bullshit." he muttered with a 'tsk'.

You got up from the sofa abruptly as you grabbed your purse. "I better get ready."

You stormed out of his office, leaving him no time to stop you from doing so. You felt horrible lying to him like this, but there was no way you were going to let anyone know about you and Jisung. Maybe this was your sign that it was all too risky. You should have done what you told yourself to do when you came back from vacation: stop everything with him. Why did you fall into his trap when he had called you not even 24 hours later while convincing you that it could be a secret?

"Hi, Y/N." Jeongin beamed at you as you arrived home.

"Is my dad here?" you asked, not even having the energy to speak properly to him.

"He left earlier. He went to the convention center in advance."

"Alright." you exhaled. "Want to help me out with getting ready?"

His eyes grew bigger. "I could call Miss Shin instead, no?"

You laughed as he mentioned one of your colleagues. "Jeongin, you're more than capable to help me. I know you like fashion anyway."

"I do..." he confirmed. "But this... it's not very my job to do so."

You rolled your eyes. "You're being dramatic. I'm asking you as a friend."

He ended up agreeing. In your room, he laid out the dress he bought for you on your bed. He asked you to pick out shoes to go along with it while he allowed himself to go through your jewelry box.

"Hoops?" he asked while showing you the pair of earrings. "And this golden chain?"

"Sure." you shrugged. "Do you think I should go with the black heels or the platforms? No, wait. I have these navy ones here." you exclaimed, rummaging through your rack of heels.

"Black ones are fine." he laughed. "I don't think navy matches well with red."

"Good point."

As you picked the shoes and brought them next to the gown, Jeongin spoke again. "I heard you yesterday." You froze in action. "Well, in fact, it was not the first time I heard you discuss with Mr. Han over the phone."

You were fucked.

"As in..." you started but couldn't even finish your sentence properly.

"As in I know you two are faking your little dislike towards each other."

You mentally cursed at yourself for not being careful enough. This only confirmed one thing in your mind: you needed to put an end to this as soon as you could.

"I'll stop this tonight, I swear."

Jeongin chuckled. "I really don't care, Y/N. The past year was the happiest I've ever seen you. If I were you, I wouldn't cut out the only thing that brought me comfort in a really long time."

You bit down your lip, hesitant. "I have to. I'm sure he already got a lot to prove as a new chairman by now. If we keep this going, this will only mark his image for life."

"You do you." he breathed out. "I'm just saying that you do seem fond of him and that it's a shame you'd want to throw it all away."

You didn't say anything. Instead, you picked the dress up and walked to your mirror in the corner of your room. Putting it up in front of your figure, you couldn't help but see yourself dressed like this with Jisung by your side. That would be the perfect picture, if it wasn't for your families. It was an impossible picture.

"Do you want help with your hair?" Jeongin grinned.

eight. - ten months and a week ago -

You cursed in a mumble at the sight of the man. As you were about to turn around to avoid him, he spotted you before you could do anything. Excusing himself to the woman he was already trying to woo, he ran to where you were standing.

"How delightful to see you here." he said cheerfully, panting from his little run.

"The feeling is the same, Mr. Ko." you faked a smile. "I didn't expect to be seeing you again."

"I had to come and apologize about my behaviour the other day. It was grandly inappropriate if me."

"It was." you agreed.

"If you allow me, I'd love to invite you for a drink."

You smiled awkwardly, until you felt a hand come around your waist.

"If she gets a drink tonight, it would be from me solemnly."

Mr. Ko's gaze went straight to Jisung as blush crept on his face. Bowing apologetically to him, he mumbled some sort of excuses before taking off to where he was previously sat at.

"Great, my knight in shining armour." you groaned as you slapped Jisung's hand away from your body. "I had this under control."

"I know, babe, but it was my time to shine." he smirked at you, placing his hand back on you. "Don't act like you didn't like me getting all protective."

"Going on that date with you last week was a mistake." you grumbled before walking away from him.

"Baby." he whined, catching up to you.

"You're such a child."

He grabbed your wrist to stop you and spun you around, your body now clashing to his chest. Before you could process a reaction, his lips found their way to yours as he laid a small peck.

"You love me like that." he said softly.

You slapped his chest and got away from his grip. "I said not in public." you nagged.

He looked around for a moment and pecked your lips again.

"Han Jisung!" you yelled out.

"There is no one."

He was now holding your hand, his thumb rubbing it gently. You scanned your surroundings for a second, and finally gave in as you let him pull you into a loving kiss.

"You do know they use this lobby for wedding ceremonies, right?" he said once he pulled away.

"Already thinking about marrying me?" you perked an eyebrow.

"I told you, princess, I've been in love with you for years."

With a huff, you started to head towards your room, him having abandoned his some days ago. "Yeah, well, keep dreaming. Once we come back home, this arrangement is over."

He shook his head violently. "Stop bringing it up, please."

"We're leaving in a week, Ji." you exhaled in frustration. "We have to face reality."

"Or." he started, taking both of your hands which stopped you from walking. "We could enjoy the remaining time we have together and worry about the rest later?"

You let go of his hands as you rolled your eyes, going straight back to where your room was. He followed behind closely and you let the door open for him to come in as well.

"Y/N, please." he said, closing the door behind him.

Throwing your belongings on the coffee table, you acted as if you were not listening. Turning on the television as you let yourself fall on the couch was his limit. He took the remote from you and aggressively turned off the screen. With a glare, he threw it away next to you before putting his hands on his hips.

"Are you avoiding this conversation?"

You groaned. "I'm not. It's just..." you cut yourself by rubbing your face. "This is messed up."

"I'll give you that." he sighed and went to sit with you. "We can stop if you want."

"I don't want to stop." you admitted. "But that's the issue. I'm simply trying to prepare myself for what's coming."

He put his hand on your thigh as a way to comfort you. "I know it sucks, which is why I'm suggesting we should only enjoy the time we have left as much as we can. Can you do that for me?"

You moved to meet his eyes and they were filled with hope.

When he confessed two weeks ago, you hadn't realized yet how sincere he was. It wasn't easy to perceive considering he had almost passed out after spilling out the words 'I like you'. Still, the morning after, you had the courage to ask him about it and that's when he told you everything. From the first time he saw you and thought you were simply gorgeous to when you defended yourself to the journalists by saying you didn't need your father's help to get to where you were now. He admired your honesty, your journey in your work, but mostly, he admired your sensitivity. He wasn't blind, he saw how you took care of Chan when he became CEO. The man was close to a mental breakdown until you came in with the biggest smile to cheer him up. He loved how unbothered you could be, how brilliant you were, and how you remained respectful to him even with your disagreements.

So seeing him almost sacrifice his career for the sake of being with you even if it meant for only a week or so, you could not resist it. Because, frankly, you had fallen for him as well. For the sensitive and ambitious man you grew to know.

"Okay." you nodded. "We'll worry about after later."

He smiled and brought you closer, kissing you for the hundredth time of the day. Gosh, how you loved the way he kissed you. It was always filled with such care and love, you were wondering how he was even the same man you thought to hate.

"I spotted this karaoke restaurant-bar in the city." he said, still holding you tight.

"What about it?"

"Should we have a date instead of ordering food?"

You looked at him incredulously. "I thought you hated going out."

"I don't mind if I get to treat you some good food."

You slapped his chest once more, a way to hide the blush appearing on your face. "You're so cheesy."

It took you both no time to get ready and dress up for the occasion. Jisung had called a cab so you wouldn't have to walk all the way there. It was crowded, to say the least. It looked like the karaoke had already started as you saw two girls in front of the mic with drinks in their hands. They sang with their tone very off and it wasn't the most pleasing thing to hear when arriving. Jisung tugged your arm and led you to a table a bit further. A waiter came up to you, asking you if you wanted something to drink to start the evening.

"Just a beer is fine." Jisung smiled at him.

"Margarita for me."

He nodded before leaving you with the menus.

"Back at it with the margaritas?" Jisung teased at you.

You shrugged. "Gets me drunk the fastest."

"Go easy on the alcohol tonight."

You frowned. "So you care about my well being?"

"No, I just don't want to deal with your hangover tomorrow." he said with a smug on his face.

"Jerk." you huffed.

When the waiter came back with your drinks, you took the opportunity to order your food as well. It was nothing too extravagant: some fries with chicken. A few people had sung on the stage and you saw a group of girls marking their names on the lineup list. Jisung seemed to notice as he got up and stood behind them. Turning to look at you, you saw the smirk on his face.

"What are you doing?" you mouthed to him.

He only shrugged and turned back his attention on the iPad where you could sign up. He spoke with the man hosting the show for a brief moment and noted down something on the screen. As he walked back to your table, you were shaking your head in exasperation.

"What did you do, now?" you said with a warning tone.

"You'll see, baby." he replied with a wink. "Let's enjoy our food for now."

You dug into your meal, not even caring about your manners anymore as you picked up the chicken drumstick with your hands. Jisung was as messy as you were, chewing on the meat. His cheeks were full, it was adorable. You saw some barbecue sauce dripping from the corner of his mouth. Although you knew he was probably going to mock you for it, you grabbed his face with your clean hand and placed a kiss on his lips. Licking the remaining of the sauce, you hummed at the taste.

Meanwhile, Jisung's mind had stopped working. This might had been the hottest thing he'd seen you do, especially since you gave him a flirtish look while your tongue was wiping off the food on your lips.

"Han Jisung and Y/N L/N." the host called out, taking the both of you by surprise.

You rushed to clean up your mouths and hands before walking up to the stage. You knew Jisung was a good singer, but as for you, it was another story. In all honesty, you hadn't sung in years.

"You chose Volcano by J.One." the host read out loud as confusion took place on his face. "Never heard of this one... Oh well, the stage is yours, lovebirds."

You went to look at Jisung in panic, but instead, you came face to face with a microphone that he was holding out to you. You did know the song, you had even added it to your favourites.

"This is like the worst of your songs that you could have picked out." you complained.

"I know, it's a hard one, but I know you have it in your playlist." he said cheekily.

As you were about to protest, the music started to play as the lyrics appeared on the screen in front of you. You couldn't move, taken over by fear and nervousness. But Jisung was doing perfectly fine. He was in his element. As the first verse started, he sang along in a mesmerizing voice. He was simply amazing. You were almost lost in him when he nudged your arm, signaling for you to sing along with him. Even though you were frightened to do so, his presence alone gave you the confidence to bring the mic close to your mouth and sing along with him. You were a little off, but Jisung encouraged you to continue and didn't even bother to correct you. The song came to an end and he did not hesitate before kissing you softly before bringing you into a warm hug.

"You did great, princess." he whispered in your ear.

That night, let's say things got steamy. Walking back clumsily in your room, he was almost biting your lips as the eagerness took over him. With your arms wrapped around his neck, you jumped around his waist while he held you firmly by the thighs. Although you had made out tons of times already, he never wanted to go further, saying he wanted to make it special. Tonight seemed to be it.

"Was it better with Felix?" he rasped out as he walked to your bedroom.

"Jealous, Han?" you snickered at him as he put you down on the edge of the bed carefully.

"I am." he said with confidence. "I'll make you feel good, baby."

"We'll see." you laughed.

To sum it up, he did way better than Felix, even when you thought it would be hard to do so. While Felix was rough, Jisung was careful and liked to build up the tension instead of going straight for it. It was frustrating in a way, but it did make the actual action ten times more worth it.

You woke up in his arms, fully naked, and his eyes were still closed shut. With his lips slightly parted open, he looked like a child taking his nap. Turning around to get a better view of him, it was enough to wake him up. He made a pout with his mouth while opening his eyes in a squint, taken aback from the morning sunlight coming right on his face.

"Rough morning?" you chuckled.

"I don't want to get up." he grumbled and brought you closer to him. "Let's stay in bed today."

"All day?"

"All day." he affirmed before kissing your temple. "Unless you had something else in mind."

"Well, you kind of made me unable to use my legs." you said, recalling the previous night. "Staying in bed it is."

"You asked for it."

nine. - ten months ago -

Six days turned into five, that turned into four, that turned into three, until it got to zero. The day you had tried to ignore for the past week. Your flight wasn't scheduled until the afternoon, so you had plenty of time to pack your baggage. But the morning was rough.

"Coffee or tea?" Jisung asked casually as he stood in front of the counter.

Your lack of answer meant a hundred of things. As he looked up to see you, you were standing in front of the sliding door to the balcony, not moving a bit. He didn't need to ask you what was on your mind, he knew it already. With a loud sigh, he walked up to you and gave you a back-hug as he put his head on your shoulder.

"I'll miss this view." you breathed out. "The water is so pretty."

"It is." he hummed. "I'll make you a tea, okay?" he said and placed a peck on your cheek.

Again, you didn't answer. He let go of you and went ahead with preparing your beverages. Before you noticed time had passed, he was back with a mug that he held out to you. You mouthed a small 'thanks' but didn't take your eyes off the scenery.

"You know we can keep contact, right?" he broke the silence.

You shook your head. "In another life, yes."

It cut right through his heart, you were right. He hated how right you were.

"We could try?"

"Jisung, stop. How would this even work? We get caught once and it'll be enough for us to get disowned." you rationalized. "This sucks, I know, but it's our reality."

"You rather get married off some rich old man?" he joked but it had some truth in it.

"It looks like this is what is waiting for me, yes. Or Chan." you shrugged. "It has been the plan since birth, just like yours to become chairman is."

"I don't want it."

You scoffed. "Yeah, well, do you have a choice? We're stuck in this."

How much he wanted to shut you up and tell you that things could be different. He wanted to beg you to not go back home and run away with him. Your thing lasted barely a month, but it was enough for him to know he wanted you with him, even if it meant to disappoint his family.

"I just wish it was easier."

"I know."

He slowly came closer to you and put his hand on your jaw which made you turn your focus on him. The tears you were holding in were finally streaming down your face as you had eye contact with him. His touch, despite being a simple gesture, made you weak.

"I'm sorry." he almost whispered. "It's my fault we started this while knowing perfectly it couldn't happen."

You nodded slowly. "Yeah, fuck you for that." you chuckled. "I really should have gotten with Felix instead."

He let out a huff. "You're still a pain in the ass."

"Just getting back to my old antics." you shrugged with a smirk appearing through your crying face.

"I see how it is, L/N." he played along. "Is there a way for me to shut that annoying mouth of yours?"

"Just try to make me shut up."

He then kissed you. You started to feel something wet on your cheeks, but it wasn't your own tears. It was him. He was crying. A knot formed in your belly as it started to truly hit how this was the last time you'd be able to kiss him. You hated how easy you fell for him and how cruel the whole situation was. When he backed away, he still leaned his forehead on yours as he plunged his gaze into yours.

"We don't mention this to anyone." he said and you could clearly hear the pain in his voice.

"This never happened." you confirmed.

He gave you a quick peck and let go of you to finish off with packing. You were still standing at the same spot, unable to process fully what was happening. Your mind was elsewhere, too preoccupied with the memories of your vacation with him.

"Can I keep your hoodie?" you blurted out.

He stared at you in confusion. "My big white hoodie? Why?"

"A souvenir I guess?"

His mouth turned into as smile and he grabbed his sweatshirt before throwing it your way. "It looks better on you, anyway."

The way to the airport was silent. In the taxicab, the driver had put some music to fill in the lack of discussion. In a discreet way, Jisung reached his hand out to hold yours and gave it a squeeze. Chills travelled down your body as you fixated your linked fingers. The effect he had on you was insane.

The ride was too quick for your liking as the driver pulled over in front of the airport. He kindly helped the two of you with getting your luggage out of his trunk. Jisung paid him and you were now off to find your flight. Since he had one stop to do for a work meeting in Europe, he wasn't going to be coming back home on the same plane. And so, here came the grand moment you had both dreaded for.

He straightened up his posture to face you properly and an emotionless expression took over. Still, you could tell how much he hated acting like this. You put on the same façade and bowed at him respectfully. You didn't want to take the risk of getting caught by someone.

"I sure hope you have a safe flight, Han."

"I hope the same for you, L/N."

Calling each other like this used to feel normal, but it had become such a foreign thing to do. It felt wrong, impersonal, almost mean. It was weird.

"I'll see you around." you nodded your head at him.

With a hum, he passed by next to you closely to head towards the gate he needed to be at. Even if people would see it as him bumping into you intentionally, he still took the time to briefly catch your hand. You felt something cold land into it. Before you could question him about it, he was already far as he walked quickly away from you. You looked at your hand and saw something shiny dangle. Bringing it close to your face, you saw what he had dropped.

It was a simple golden chain accessorized with a charm: a rose.

ten. - now -

Your father had sent a limousine to come pick you up. Of course, you had to have a grand entrance at the ceremony. There would be journalists and cameras, and so it was primordial for you to be looking at your very best. Jeongin helped you get in the car like a gentleman. You would have asked him to come with you, but the guy did deserve a break. He kissed your cheek goodbye and wished you an enjoyable evening.

When your limousine arrived in front of the convention center, you could already see cameras flashes and microphones being held out towards your direction. Taking a deep breath, your door opened as your driver offered his hand to help you out. You put on a fake smile for the pictures but denied any kind of interviews. You were not in the mood for that. As you entered the building, you were impressed by how Chan's team had decorated the place. It was very formal but it still had a hint of comfort. Before you knew it, your father had spotted you. Welcoming you with arms open, he gave you a small hug.

"Y/N, my dear, I am happy you made it here safely." he grinned. "I would love to present you to someone."

You deadpanned at him. "Another of your potential suitors for me?"

"He is young and vibrant. An excellent businessman for his age, I shall mention."

As you grumbled under your breath in annoyance, your father brought you over to a group of men, all of them wearing a tuxedo. They all looked the same...

Then, you caught a glimpse of a man who was visibly younger than most of them. He stood closely to who you assumed to be his parents as he bowed instinctively to the others. Upon seeing your father, he smiled politely.

"Mr. L/N." he bowed.

"Hi, Mr. Hwang." your father beamed at him. "I found my daughter that I wanted to introduce you to."

You shut your eyes in internal pain. He really had to present you like you were some kind of product to sell? You never liked being your father's pet, even less now that he just wanted to marry you off someone wealthy.

"A pleasure to meet you." Mr. Hwang nodded his head at you. "I'm Hyunjin."

"Nice to meet you." you replied back with a bow. "I believe I saw you in a publicity recently, no?"

He laughed embarrassingly. "Right, I'm a model."

Ah. He was one of those guys.

"I assume you were invited to help with Mr. Bang's publicity team."

"Exactly." he confirmed. "You know the business well."

"I actually am about to become CEO of L/N Corporation."

He bowed again. "I apologize, I really didn't mean it like that, I was simply trying to make the conversation."

You knew he was being honest, he seemed too clueless of a man to be saying such things intentionally. Maybe models weren't as bad as you thought.

"It's okay, really." you chuckled. "Have you met Mr. Bang yet?" He shook his head. "He's a close friend of mine. I can present you to him."

His eyes went wide. "Really?"

His mother nudged his arm for being informal and he coughed shyly as he apologized.

"It's fine, really. Come, I'll introduce you."

You took his hand in yours and led him towards Chan who had a drink with some of his colleagues. He noticed you were approaching him and excused himself to come give you a big hug.

"Well, aren't you pretty today? It's good that you look pleasing to the eye once in a while." he joked.

"Thank you, Chan, really." you grumbled. "Anyway, I wanted you to meet Hwang Hyunjin."

The latter bowed politely to your friend. "Good evening, Mr. Bang. I don't know if you remember me, but I did appear in one of your promotion videos once."

Chan shifted to his professional role and nodded as Hyunjin spoke. "I remember. I even asked one of the leading directors to contact you again."

"Really? I haven't heard from them."

You left them at it and walked back to your father who had ended up flirting with one of the ladies from the Bang's engineer team. You understood that he might need someone ever since your mom left, but did he really have to do it during an event like this?"

"Father." you interrupted him and he glared at you.

"Aren't you with Mr. Hwang?"

"I offered to introduce him to Mr. Bang."

He sighed in disappointment. "Alright, maybe Hwang wasn't the right fit." He put his hand on your back and started to walk closer to the bar. "I have someone else I want you to meet."

"Yay." you said in a bored tone. "I think I can pass for this one-"

"Mr. Lee!" you father called out. "May I present to you my daughter."

Mr. Lee turned around at the mention of his name and his eyes fell upon your figure. Immediately, the both of you stared back at each other in pure shock.

"Y/N!" he exclaimed.

"Felix!" you said in the same tone of voice.

He pulled you into a tight hug, leaving your poor father in confusion. "You know each other..." he trailed off.

"Mr. L/N, I met your daughter during her vacation last year."

You dad nodded his head slowly. "I see. I will leave you two reconnect. Call me if you need anything." he said as he put his hand on your shoulder for a brief moment.

As he walked away from you two, you exchanged laughs. "What a coincidence! How is it that you are here and not in Australia?" you questioned him while he offered you a glass of champagne.

"I'm here to do business with Chan. I didn't know you were familiar with him."

"We are literally best friends." you chuckled. "How do you know him?"

"I'm sure he told you he grew up in Australia." You nodded. "We used to be neighbours."

"Wow." you let out in a breath. "Such a small world, uh?"

"It is." he laughed. "Your father is quite a persona. He was bragging about you for a solid ten minutes earlier."

"Oh gosh." you said while hiding your face in embarrassment.

"Yeah, he wasn't being very subtle about his intentions. Let me reassure you right away, I won't ask you to marry me. We already established how we feel about that last year."

You smiled at him. "Thank you, Felix. I'm glad I don't have Chan as my only friend tonight."

He shrugged. "There is Han too." he pointed to nowhere in particular. "I saw him earlier."

You huffed in disgust. "I don't intend to speak with him."

He gave you a soft smile. "Quit it, Y/N. I know about you two."

Your eyes grew bigger and you nudged his arm. "Say it louder... How the hell do you know?"

"Jisung isn't so good with handling these kinds of things on his own. Don't worry, I didn't tell anyone and I think I'm the only one who's aware of what happened."

You were going to snap at Jisung, that was for sure.

"Great..." you muttered under your breath.

"You do realize how in love he is with you, right?" he asked before taking a sip of his champagne.

"Yes, I'm well aware of it. It can't happen, though. There is too much to risk if it gets out in the news."

"Did you know he refused to take his father's spot?"

You almost choked on your drink. You were certain to have heard correctly back in Chan's office that he did, in fact, get the position. What was Felix even saying?

"He did what now?"

Felix couldn't answer. Your dear best friend had to interrupt your conversation as he took the spot on stage with a microphone. He started to thank the guests for coming and explained the purpose of this gathering. You were not listening one bit. Instead, your eyes wandered around the crowd as you tried to find the one man who had taken such a huge part of your life. Then, you spotted him. Close to the stage, he was next to his father as he was listening attentively to Chan. He looked extremely good, and he was matching you. Dressed in a burgundy red suit with a tie of the same colour, you wanted to curse Jeongin for having chosen your dress. He surely knew Jisung was going to wear something similar. It was as if he knew you were staring when his own gaze found yours. He sent a quick smile your way, one so darn adorable that it could make you melt, and turned his attention back to Chan. You needed to speak with him, and fast.

The second after Chan finished his speech, you excused yourself to Felix and went straight ahead towards Jisung. The latter had left his family and was looking at the pamphlet of the new Bang inc. projects instead. He didn't even see you arrive until you grabbed him by the arm harshly, dragging him behind as you headed towards a random hallway where you could discuss privately. He started to let out incoherent complaints but you ignored him. You soon found an empty conference room and shoved him inside, not forgetting to lock the door behind you and close the curtains.

"Y/N, the fuck?" he exclaimed.

"I could ask you the same." you said angrily, crossing your arms in front of your chest.

You saw him stare up and down at you. He really had the guts to check you out while you were beyond furious with him.

"Han Jisung." you yelled out sternly and he jumped a little.

"What is it?" he asked innocently.

"Why am I hearing that you refused your position as chairman of Han technologies?"

Oh. It suddenly clicked in his mind. He had planned to tell you himself, but things didn't go his way.

"I'm resigning from the company."

You stared at him blankly. "Sorry, what?" you asked, completely bewildered by his statement.

"I refused to sign the contract this morning and I'm getting off duties by the end of the month." he said calmly. "It was too much for me."

You shook your head in disbelief. "You can't do that. Jisung, we talked about this before. This is your whole career, why did you-" you cut yourself off, too shaken up by his announcement. "Have you thought this out?"

"I did." he said with an elongated breath. "My dad discovered my music not so long ago and we argued a bit about it."

"Why didn't you tell me this?"

He ignored your question. "He ended up being quite okay with it. He said he didn't realize how much pressure he was putting on me and that I could do what I want as long as it pays off my bills. Plus, he said I could always come back if it doesn't work." he shrugged.

"Wow." was the the only thing you could say. "He really said that?"

He laughed. "Not exactly, my mom is the one I have to thank for that, she talked him through it."

"Makes more sense." you hummed.

"I also told them about you."

Now, you really wanted to punch him in the balls right there and then.

"Just like you told Felix?" you huffed.

"And Chan... and Jeongin..." he saw how you were about to beat the shit out of him and he held up his hands in defense. "They figured it out by themselves, I simply confirmed their suspicions."

You rolled your eyes. "Is this why he bought me this dress to be matching with you?"

He smirked and nodded proudly. You sighed in disbelief and sat down on one of the chairs, gesturing for him to continue.

"I think you know it by now, but I'm so hopelessly in love with you."

You grunted, absolutely enraged by his behaviour. You could simply not believe how dumb of him it was to give up such an opportunity, and then tell your friends about your mistake of the previous year. And now, he really had to top it all with declaring his love for you?

"You keep being fucking unrealistic with this whole thing." you said, shaking your head in disapproval. "We have decades of rivalry between us, we were only being stupid with what we did."

He scoffed. "So last year meant nothing to you?"

"What I'm saying is that it was something that shouldn't have happened. I wanted to put a stop to it tonight." you affirmed but he didn't seem convinced.

"You're wearing the necklace." he pointed to the rose charm hanging around your neck.

You shrugged. "It was going well with the dress, that's all."

"It does, and you simply look stunning tonight." he said as he walked closer to you.

You stood up to come face to face with him. "Don't dodge the subject with your flirts, Han."

"What is stopping us, really? A career? I've already given up mine and I know for a fact that you hate your job." he said softly, getting more and more close to you.

"Our families-" you started but he interrupted you with a laugh.

"You hate your dad and I've talked to mine already. It's okay."

He hesitated, but reached his hand up to your face. By then, you didn't even know how to breathe anymore. It was the first time he touched you so intimately since that moment in the taxicab. It was as electrifying as you remembered.

"Please tell me you feel the same." he said in a whisper. "There was not a single moment where I didn't regret not trying to convince to run away with me."

"Jisung..." you breathed out.

"I won't force you into anything. If wanting to put an end to this is what you want, we'll do just that. I won't say I didn't try at least."

Your faces were millimeters apart. It was a question of time before he was going to kiss you. But you backed away.

"We can't."

And just like that, you ran away from him, leaving him alone in the room. You didn't know exactly why you did so. No matter what the reason was, you just wanted to go home. The rollercoaster he caused was too much to bear with. You didn't even say bye to Chan and you left.

The driver was still in the street, so you called him out and asked him to bring you home. He did look at you suspiciously, but obliged nonetheless. Before you knew it, you were at your front porch and the driver left you alone. You sat down, not even trying to keep your dress clean, and you cried. You weren't sad nor happy, just confused. It was a few minutes after when Jeongin joined you and engulfed you in a hug. He didn't ask what happened, but he just knew you needed someone for you at least.

"I should have said congratulations to Chan at least." you finally spoke and Jeongin allowed himself to let out a small chuckle.

"He knows you're proud of him already."

"Yeah, but it's still shitty of me." you sobbed. "And, Innie, I fucked up so bad..."

"You dumped him there, didn't you?"

Damn, this kid was good at guessing. But he did know most things about you so it was only natural he got you right on that.

"I don't even know why..." you groaned as more tears came out. "He's so... ugh, and I'm like... meh."

He cocked his head to the side, unsure if he understood what you meant. "That's a way to put it I guess?"

"I meant that he just does so much for our... whatever we have, to work out and I'm being a bitch by ditching him."

He smiled awkwardly. "I can't say you're wrong with this one."

"And what am I even going to do if this turns out to be a fiasco? I'll get fired, my dad will disown me, and I'll live off an underground musician's income?"

Jeongin winced at your reflection. "You're overthinking now..."

"I know." you grunted. "It's just... What do I do?"

You turned to look at him properly and noticed how discouraged he seemed to be with you. As you thought, he gave you a look.

"What?" you sighed.

"You know what to do, Y/N. You're just afraid." he explained but you didn't quite get it. "You've been this perfect daughter for years and you're scared of change."

"I mean, aren't we all?"

"Some are more daring than others, just like Han dared to confront his parents because he loves you."

As realization slowly crept in your mind, you buried yourself in your arms. Why did you have to be such an ass to him?

"You're saying I should go back and say I want him too?" you mumbled.

"Essentially, yeah. But like I said, you do you." he said as he patted your back. "No matter what you do, I'm sure Han will understand."

"Do you mind driving me back?" you said as you shot your head up, pouting at him.

He deadpanned at you. "You came all the way back here just to go back?"

"Yeah?" you chuckled embarrassingly.

"Alright, but go clean up your face. Your mascara didn't hold up right."

A few minutes later, you were in Jeongin's car as he drove you back to the convention center. To not cause a fuss, he went all around to the back of the building so you could walk in more discreetly.

"What if he left too?" you said in panic as you were about to leave the vehicle.

"Jeez, Y/N, just go!" he rushed you out.

You entered and arrived in an empty hallway, not creepy at all. Still, you could hear the chatter coming from the main event so you simply followed it. On your way, you came to the washrooms and heard moaning from there.

"Gross." you mumbled to yourself.

Moving on, you started to get more familiar to your surroundings when you saw the room where you had left Jisung earlier. Only now, the door was open and the lights turned off which meant he had gone back to the party probably. You finally arrived to the main room and noticed that Chan was just done with introducing his new line of products. You clapped along with the crowd and cheered loudly. He recognized your voice as he immediately moved his eyes to where you were standing. With a large grin, he thanked the audience once more and came down to crush you in a hug.

"How did I do?" he asked.

"Great..." you trailed off and he gave you a look.

"You didn't watch, right?"

"I'm sorry, Chan." you chuckled. "I... kind of ran away?"

He rolled his eyes. "Han Jisung?"

"Why the hell is everyone aware of my business?" you whined.

"He came to talk to me after you left. He's alone at the bar if you are looking for him." he laughed. "Go get your man, bestie." he said jokingly.

"I'll have to talk to you after we sort this out." you said in a warning voice before leaving to go to the bar.

When you finally got to him, you kept a distance to observe what state he was in. Hair disheveled, tie loosened, he was mixing his margarita with a straw and started blankly in the void. You felt bad, even worse than you expected.

"I would have never thought of you as one for the margaritas." you spoke up.

At the sound of your voice, he looked around in confusion until he noticed you were standing behind him. He shook his head as a chuckle left his mouth.

"Are you quoting me now?"

You took the spot next to him and stole the drink from his grip. "Perhaps I am." you shrugged and then took a sip of the drink. "I like the ones from the island better."

"So picky." he huffed. "I'm sorry for being so bold earlier."

You shook your head violently. "Stop, I'm the one at fault."

He tilted his head from side to side. "Not really. I can't blame you for not wanting the same thing as me."

"But that's the thing..." you said before taking a deep breath. "I want the same thing as you."

He stared at you for a moment. The lack of response on his part quite frightened you. After a bit, he finally moved as he placed his hand on your forehead.

"Are you okay?"

Frowning, you looked at him, perplexed. "I am..."

He retrieved his hand away. "You're being for real? Don't give me false hope, I swear I'll axe you if you do so."

You laughed. "I'm serious. Look, Jisung, I haven't been fair to you."

He shook his head as he took your face by the jaw. "Don't say that."

"You know I'm right. I led you on, kept denying your attention and I literally ran away from you." you listed out. "I think I'm in love with you too. I was just stupid enough to never admit it to myself."

You had never seen him smile this much. "You're fucking stubborn, yeah." he grinned. "But I love that about you. Plus, playing hard to get is quite attractive."

You scoffed. "Fuck off, I'll go back to Felix."

You were about to walk away but he grabbed you by the wrist to stop you. Gently, he pulled you closer by the neck and kissed you. He. Kissed. You. In front of literally everyone. You heard gasps of shock, but surprisingly, you didn't care. All that mattered was that you had your lips on Jisung again. The butterflies you had suppressed for months had come back at an overwhelming level but you were happy.

"Y/N L/N!" you heard your father yell.

Separating yourself from Jisung, you rolled your eyes as you came face to face with a furious man.

"Hey." you smiled in an exaggerated manner.

"You've got a lot of explaining to do, young lady. I made sure during your whole life you'd be ready to take over my place, and you're pulling this show tonight?"

You let out a groan. "Really? A show? I get you have built a reputation and shit for years, but for what? Really, come to think of it, this whole rivalry thing is ridiculous. Yeah, sure, they sued us, but heck, we got over it."

He huffed in disbelief. "It had to be a Han, uh?"

Dropping your shoulders, you didn't even know what to say anymore. "He's not like that. You know what? I don't even know why I'm fighting you over this." you started to get annoyed.

"It's okay, Y/N-" Jisung started, but you went off again which interrupted him.

"No, Jisung, this is not okay. I've done literally everything to go according to this man's expectations and I can't even be happy for one moment?"

By then, more people had gathered around the scene. Some of them whispered among themselves, others just watched in pure shock. Then, Jisung's parents arrived and stood next to your dad. This was going so well...

"You two are okay with this?" you father asked the Han.

Jisung's mother simply shrugged. "I mean, she seems to make our son happy." she said in a small voice making your father turn to Mr. Han to incite him to speak his thoughts out.

He did the same as his wife, not sure on what to answer. "I'd have to say, Mr. L/N, that your daughter is quite a remarkable woman. I think our son is in good hands."

"I agree." you heard Chan speak up somewhere in the crowd. You finally spotted him and sent him a look as to ask what he was doing. "I think it is time to tone down the hard feelings in my opinion, Mr. L/N." he patted your father's back.

"Chan-" Jisung started but the glare he received from him shut him up real quick.

"I think this is a good way to put an end to this competition between your families, no? Anyhow, I think they make a fine couple." he continued and then held his glass up. "How about we go on with our evening?"

Chan had power, which meant everyone were taking his opinion into consideration. If he said something was fine, it meant it was fine. If he wanted to move on from something, then people moved on. This was exactly what happened. As the mass of people dispersed themselves, you saw your dad walk further away with Jisung's parents, seemingly discussing about what they just saw. As for Chan, he joined the pair of you.

"That's quite a show stealer you put up just now." he laughed.

"Thank you, Chan." you said sincerely.

Jisung rubbed your back gently as he nodded with you. "Yeah, thank you for that."

Chan shrugged. "I'm rooting for you two, but don't put yourselves in trouble too much because I can't save you all the time."

"We won't." Jisung said as he looked at you. "I think we can manage from now."

eleven. - epilogue -

"Time's up."

Looking up from your laptop, you had daggers in your eyes as you stared at Jisung through your glasses. He was already fully dressed with black pants and a beige coat as he tapped his foot on the floor in an impatient way.

"I'm almost done." you said as you focused back on your screen.

He let out a groan. "Y/N, love."

"It won't take long." you argued, not taking your eyes off as you typed aggressively on your keyboard.

"You said the same thing ten minutes ago and we have a flight in..." he checked the time on his phone. "two hours now." he deadpanned at you.

"I just have to send this to Chan real quick."

"Exactly, it's Chan so no pressure."

He came to your dining table and snatched your computer away from you. While you reached out to get it back, he saved your file and closed it off before putting it in his bag.

"Han Jisung." you said in a stern voice.

"Thank me later, baby." he kissed your cheek but you refused to fall for it.

"I have to send it over."

"I know, love, but Jeongin had this handled, no? Just trust him on this one."

Still pouting, you took your coat and put it on before grabbing your luggage. "I shouldn't have agreed to go on this stupid trip."

"Don't be like this, you love seeing Felix." he snickered.

"I don't mind going to Australia." you argued as you approached the front door of your house. "I mind not getting my work done in time."

"Love, you're literally weeks ahead for everything." he sighed loudly.

You walked to your car and started to load it with your bags. While Jisung went back inside to get more of your belongings, you received a call. Putting the phone between your ear and your shoulder, you answered.

"What's up, Hyunjin?" you said cheerfully.

"Someone's in a good mood." he laughed. "I take it that you're leaving soon?"

"Yeah, we're about to go to the airport. How is it there?"

"I love it, really. Felix rented a house for us so we can all stay together." he said excitedly. "I was calling to ask you something about the report you filled out this morning, actually."

You frowned. "What about it?"

"Why didn't you mark Jisung's name? For the collaborator, I mean."

You grunted. "Shit, I totally forgot. I'm sorry, I'm still not used to him being back in the business."

"All good." he chuckled. "Though I need it by the end of the week. Otherwise, my application can be denied."

"I know, I'll do it as soon as I get there."

Jisung looked at you curiously as he stood next to the car with the door opened, waiting for you to be done.

"No stress." Hyunjin answered.

"I have to go now, but I can't wait to see you two!"

"See you in a few hours!"

Hanging up, you and Jisung got in the car and he drove away from your house. As you hummed along the music, you suddenly remembered something. Turning the volume down, you looked at your fiancé in panic.

"Tell me you locked the door."

He rolled his eyes. "I did, stop being so stressed."

"I'm sorry, jeez." you said in a defensive tone.

"This trip is for us to take a break from work, just like the good old days. Relax a little, can you do that for me?"

You absolutely hated it when he used his soft loving tone. You could simply not resist it. With a sigh, you nodded your head and you grabbed his hand that was hanging between your two seats.

"You're right."

He smiled and started to play with your hand, fiddling with your engagement ring. "Plus, we get to visit the venue for the wedding." he said before kissing your hand.

"Felix better had chosen a good spot." you huffed.

"If you don't like it, we can visit some more." he shrugged.

You shook your head as a no. "I just want a place to marry you."

"You're sweet, baby, but I don't want to get married in a wrecked place." he laughed.

"Fair enough."

You said that, but in all honesty, you just wanted to marry him right away. Him. The man you believed to hate until he turned your world upside down. The man who was ready to give up everything just to be with you. If this is not husband material, you don't know what it is. But one thing for sure, you wanted to be with him for the rest of your life.

taglist: @lenilla15 | @muddy-waters | @nanaspalette | @nattisboredd | @popcatx0 | @vanblack95 | @aestheticsluut | @thanxxskz | @minhoino | @taetertotsv | @luvscrazy | @lethallyprotected

[parad-ice-lostandfound]

<[ ♡ ~ Introduction

Hi!! I'm Bvnny, I’m excited to do this exchange with you. I’m fem-presenting but I consider myself nonbinary. I don’t perceive myself as really having a gender and i don’t feel feminine or masculine, however, i like to do more feminine presenting things. I use she/her and they/them pronouns. I’d like a romantic matchup and I’m bisexual but tbh I don’t see myself with thirteen lol so that kind of cuts out the only girl. Also, if I could NOT get paired with Beel that would be awesome- he reminds me of my little brother for me to see him like that ;-;. I don’t have a lot of freetime but I play video games with my sister and I like to sew. I also love researching gang-related crime, serial killers, and anything involving children and their development. I love criminal psychology and child development-based psychology so opportunities to learn and even combine them always make me happy.

<[ ♡ ~ Appearance

I’ve got warm black hair that goes down just past my chin. Its a medium bob with some curtain bangs. I’m 5’2 and about 100 lbs so I'm pretty small (shelves are a bitch). I’ve got light brown eyes with a weird dark greenish brown ring around it. I’m biracial (whispanic lesgooo) so I’m not super tan but I’m not a ghost either. I’m a comfortable light olive and I can tan more with sunlight (ew) I’ve got enough freckles that you notice if you're right in front of me but not so many that it takes over my whole face. I’m normally in my converse or my work boots (which are always shined to be perfect thank u <3) I’m definitely a rectangle and I’m fairly thin. I’ve got hardly any ass and minimal boob-age. I’ve got p good thighs tho so that's nice. However, I've got the “ideal” body type for the stereotypical y2k outfits!!!! That's the majority of my closet- I wear lots of flare jeans, halter tops, and honestly if you look up 2000s I've probably worn half the outfits there. Brown is the best color for me, but I wear lots of yellow (my fave!!). Another huge part of my style is influenced by chicano culture since that’s what I was raised in and around. I have loads of FB County Charlie Brown crop tops in about 8 different colors. My dream is for the charlie brown halter tops, but for now I’ll live with just my flannel halter. I really just love dressing up for anything- no such thing as overdressed in my book. I like spending hours on my makeup and I refuse to leave the house without my eyeliner and eyeshadow being perfect. I put a lot of effort into my appearance- skincare twice a day, making sure my makeup is perfect, making sure my outfit is on point, etc., etc.. If I don't feel like it’s my best, I probably won’t wear it. It’s either a nice and easy 5 minutes or it takes me an hour. Between us, I’ve been late to school because of my makeup on more than one occasion (and it’ll happen again).

<[ ♡ ~ Personality

Here’s a few of my personality stuff incase you don't want to read through:

Enneagram 2w1

INFP

Scorpio Sun, Scorpio Moon, Pisces Rising

I’ve also got ADHD and a weird anxiety disorder (mentions of anxious thoughts and compulsions) I go into at the end. it’s the last paragraph of this section if you want to skip it!!

Those basically boil it down to everything you need to know, but i’ll go in depth! I’m the oldest of 5 siblings. My sister A is about to turn 16, my sister B is 14, my brother C is 13, and my youngest (and favorite i’ve got no shame about it) is D and she’s 7. Honestly being their big sister is my only personality trait- D is all I talk about. She’s literally always with me too. I’m at all of her school events, she hangs out in my room (even when I’m not there), she’s going with me to grocery stores and if I get free time I’ll play video games with her like minecraft, among us, and maybe roblox (strong maybe, i have to be in a real good mood it makes me car sick ;-;)

My learning disability can make me forget things and seem fairly spacey. Right now it’s for sure ADHD, and my therapist is leaning towards autism as well but we’re avoiding an official diagnosis bc it will limit me in the career I want to enter. I cannot sit still for the life of me- I’m convinced if i do i’m gonna die. Normally i’m pretty good about masking with minimal energy- one of my special interests has always been psychology. i’ll mirror people for fun sometimes, but then i end up accidentally picking up habits. but, at the end of the day, i’m still a big neurodivergent mess. my biggest stims are chewing (rubber, my lips and fingers (not hard!!!), and silicone), tippy taps, arm flapping, and spinning. I love headphone cords and lego tires, they’re my favorite and they’re just so comforting. bc if my chewing stim, i’m literally always snacking. people get concerned when i tell them i don’t have a lot of full meals but i literally ate 2 costco boxes of goldfish, about 3 packages of gerber star puffs for babies, and still had lasagna for dinner. i eat a lot- just not all at once. this also can cause me to start stress eating. Its hard for me to be hyper aware at the end of the day too. My jobs require me to be watching everything, but at the end of it, i just want to watch my LEDS change colors.

As much as I love my siblings, they are also the reason you can see a couple gray hairs starting to grow. They are the biggest trigger for my compulsions- especially D. If something isn’t perfect, and my youngest sister is around, I get unreasonably stressed out. I always joke that I can never sleep when she’s in my room because I’m worried the Kool-Aid man will bust through the wall and I'll sleep through it. However, there is some weight to that. If (and tbh when) my sister falls asleep in my bed, I’m up doing anything to keep me busy because for whatever reason it just doesn’t feel safe to sleep. This stems for the kids I work with as well. My co-workers make jokes about me being a perfectionist but it feels like if something is out of place bad things will happen. We love anxiety, real hot girl shit.

Small things I’ll do is constantly re-organize things. I’m constantly fidgeting with stuff and putting things back into “place” (where I decided they have to go for the rest of time). I do the same with our silverware. I’ll make sure all of our plates are in a rainbow. I have to do certain things in the exact same order every time. I’m VERY particular about how stuff in my room is- the quickest way to stress me out is to touch my stuff, move it around, or mess with my routine. Depending on how I’m feeling, that might literally make me have a breakdown. But being able to expect things every single time or fix things and make it right just calms me and makes me feel in control of something small, and even that can boost my mood and confidence a bit.

I work 3 jobs right now- law enforcement, I co-teach in a special occupational pre-school for high school students, and I baby sit at least twice a week. I have been pursuing a childcare career for 5 years, however, right now I’m piloting an state-wide high school internship program for local law enforcement departments. It was a pain to try and get started- I get to take the trial run since i’m 18 and a senior with a lot of law club training. I got voted as president of our high school’s law enforcement club as a joke my sophomore year and I just… keep… getting… re… elected. It’s not bad- I actually switched from thinking about teaching because of it and now I’m considering juvenile probation and teaching as a retirement job. I’m still debating- teaching is very important to me.

Because I’ve had a lot of work in childcare and shitty retail jobs, i’ve got an ungodly amount of patience. I have a scar on my leg from where a kid threw a table at me- he was still my favorite at the end of my program tho. It takes a lot for me to not like someone. I’m an upbeat person who is always eager to help and lend a hand. There’s an old lady trying to load something big into her car? Bam, Bvnny to the rescue. Need a door opened? Bam, door held. A lot of this stems from being the oldest of 5 tbh- I not only want to be someone my siblings can look up to, but I also want to be someone who can be as awesome as their parents. Admittedly, it gets really difficult when my siblings are all so different, my parents are grade-A overachievers, and I've got a bingo game going with potential learning disabilities. But I always push myself anyways- usually too far and burn myself out but it’s cool (this is a cry for help /j)

Because of how much I push myself to be better, I see a lot of improvement over time. However this also can make me a smidgen (a big smidgen lmaooo) bit defensive over how I present myself. Like, I’ve been ugly. I’ve been teased. I’ve been bullied. But I’ve worked my ass off to fix those things, and I work my ass off to maintain those things. I just put a lot of effort into how I carry myself and having it insulted is like damn I worked so hard for what???? Like if you call me ugly its like ugh but honestly I don’t care if I don’t know you. The one thing that will ALWAYS piss me off is when people try to discount my intelligence. Like I said before, I’ve been the ugly kid. I’ve been a weird kid. I’ve been the kid that gets bullied for stuff I can’t control. HOWEVER, the one thing I’ve always had going for me was that I’m smart. I was always the one helping with homework and it saved my ass more than once. I’ll take constructive criticisms, but not asshole criticism. It’ll hurt my pride </3

On a serious note, If I were to connect to any of the seven sins, it would 100% be Lucifer’s. I wouldn’t say i’m lucifer-levels of pride, but like it’s def there. I take pride in my siblings, my appearance, my job, etc., etc. I’m proud, but I feel like I’ve earned it with how hard I’ve worked to get here and how fucking cool my siblings turned out (that also might just be my ego talking, who knows?) Like A and B are so beyond beautiful and super popular. They're awesome at sports and are amazing with people. C is 6’2 and 270lbs of muscle (he’s 13 need i remind you ;-;) but he’s gentle and he gives the best hugs and he can fix literally anything. We also go on brother-sister dates to panda express after he wins a football game (he’s had a perfect season and my wallet hurts). D is so good at art and she’s beautifully kind. She can communicate better than adults do. Like if someone is bothering her she can set her boundary and stick with it. She is super empathetic and loves animals and wants to be a dog groomer when she grows up. She’s unironically funnier than all of us and with the amount of sass that leaves her mouth it’s obvious she’s got 4 big siblings (it’s never disrespectful tho, that’s the best part).They are all going to do wonderful things and I’m so excited to see it. I will also do anything, and I mean anything, to guarantee they get to do those great things they dream about.

<[ ♡ ~ Relationship Info

For a partner, I seriously need someone who can understand that I have no freetime. At all. Ever. I hardly ever leave the house, and if I do it’s literally to go shopping. For 18 i feel so lame lol. Chances are my partner is going to be one of my 3 friends. Despite not even being out of high school yet (2 more months thank god) I need something more domestic and less teenage romance. Like getting home from work and relaxing with our 4 dogs (forgot to mention I have 4 big dogs whoops). I need someone who is decent enough with kids to get along with my siblings. It’s also super important that I can have conversations with them- and they want to have them too. Not like “Hi honey how was your day?” “good” “What did you do?” “work.” I want them to want to talk too. I want to know everything about my partner. Would you love me if i was a worm? Would you love me if YOU were a worm? What if we were both worms? I want to have stupid conversations like that but I would also kill to talk about psychological theories and child development and have not-stupid conversations. I want someone intelligent enough to talk to me and make me want to learn, but also willing to indulge in my stupid theoretical conversations. They’ve also gotta understand my siblings will literally always come first. It could be our wedding day and if my sister calls me and says she needs me i’ll be out of there so fast you wouldn’t even have time to process. Family is super important to me, and eventually I want my very own little family that will be just as important, if not more so.

My top 3 love languages are quality time, physical touch, and acts of service. I’d say quality time and physical touch are the ones I want the most, but acts of service are the ones I appreciate the most if that makes any sense.

Quality Time- I'm huge on napping together and just parallel play (doing different activities but together). I love napping together because I literally always need one, but I'm more than content to just cuddle while I play my games on my phone and my partner does whatever they’re doing. Hell, we don’t even have to cuddle (I'd like it if we did). We can just sit in the same room and enjoy each other's presence. My quality time also extends to my family- the chances of my youngest sister being with me is pretty much 100%. She’s my thunder buddy- if she doesn't want to hang out with you neither do I. Most of the time if she’s with me she’s drawing or playing games on her own and is just hanging out with me in my room or in the car. If I have time Ill play games with her so if you aren’t down to spend some time with her then out the door with you. Realistically, if I were to go down to the devildom, she’d end up coming with me in some freak magic accident. And I’d make it so she can stay- when I said I’d do anything for them I was NOT kidding.

Physical Touch- I know I said we don't have to cuddle but like if we can I’m over the moon. I love getting to feel my partner. I'm okay with linking pinkies when we do stuff or touching knees when we sit. As long as I can feel my partner next to me I'm over the moon! I love hugs, I love kisses, I love playing with people's hair, I love getting my hair played with. I’m always giving my youngest sister little scratches on the head or smoothing her hair down or straightening her clothes. I’ll give her hugs before I leave and she always falls asleep cuddling with me. I never say no when my brother wants to give me hugs (which is all the time, bless his heart) and even when he picks me up off the ground I’m still okay with it. My middle sisters are NOT as fond of me touching them so I try to avoid it- B will literally swat my hand away if I’m even remotely close to her. But I’ll do small things like tucking in their shirt tags or fixing their hair. Does this fall into acts of service? Kind of, but it’s the only contact I get with them let me have it ;-;

Acts of Service- I have so much I need to get done. All the time. Every day. And there are tons of things I struggle with doing even when I’m not trying to get 80 other tasks done. Like laundry- laundry always ends up being the last of my list. Without fail. Cleaning in general just hardly ever happens.I pretty much live in my car with how often I’m driving and it definitely shows. If I find time to clean my spaces, chances are it’s at the very end of my day when I’m tired and honestly I end up putting it off for extra hours of much needed sleep. It’s not that I want my partner to do all the cleaning- honestly I’m so particular I’d rather do it myself- but if they did something like laundry or they made food for tomorrow or just something small it means the world. However this also goes both ways. I love doing stuff for other people. I love getting to make my partner meals or help with a project or carry something for them. It just makes my heart happy to relax with my loved ones. <3

Ifs too long let me know- I’ll give you a TLDR lol <3333 I’m super looking forward to this matchup with you :)))

Hi Bvnny! I am so excited and happy to do this exchange* with you! Your idea is one of a kind and so unique, and I love it very much! Don't worry about having written too much, it's more material for me to work with after all. Now, without any further delay, I pair you with...

Simeon!

To be quite honest, while I was reading through everything, it was so hard to pinpoint who would be a good match for you. I would think, "Huh, this character is perfect for them" and then BAM! you hit me with something that makes me go "Now wait a minute-"

In all honesty, it was fun, and for some time I was stuck between Mammon and Simeon, but Simeon won at the end, as you can see lol.

Simeon adores everything about you, from your freckles to your outfits. How can he not? You are mesmerizing in his eyes. He feels extremely happy that you take care of how you look, not because of what others think or say, but because you feel like it, because you want to. He wouldn't mind if the two of you got late for RAD because you wanted your makeup to be perfect. Chances are he's there with you watching you, his eyes wide in wonder and admiration, or helping you if you allow him to.

While he is not one for much PDA , one of Simeon's favorite things is to press featherlight kisses to your freckles, whenever you allow him. Solomon teases him about being obsessed with them every once in a while, but Simeon doesn't mind.

Simeon is good with children. He likes to listen to you talking about your siblings and wishes to meet them himself. He knows and understands that family comes first for you. He gets a little nervous about meeting your siblings, especially D, because he wants to leave a good impression on them. Not only because they are your siblings, but because your talking about them has made him grow fond of them.

Simeon is very attentive when it comes to you. He can't help it, its in his nature to care and nurture. He is good at realizing when you get a bit fidgety or look like you need sometime away from whatever has your anxiety spiking. He makes sure that you don't skip meals, and even if you do snack because of your chewing stim, whatever you snack on is nutritious. He will absolutely die if you mirror something he does or pick up a habit of his. You are too adorable for his poor angel heart, have mercy on him lol-

Simeon likes how the two of you you could be discussing whether you would love the other person if they were a worm, and afterwards, about a documentary you watched. Many of your discussions give him ideas for his books. You are, quite literally, his muse.

Simeon doesn't like seeing you burn yourself out. He loves you, and knows just how beautiful and amazing you are inside and out. Your tendency to push yourself too far brings out his protectiveness, and he can and will mother hen you into taking care of yourself before anything else. He will not have you ignoring your needs and wants. Simeon also will not stand for anyone taking undue advantage of your helpful nature.

Simeon is in awe of you. Your three jobs? Your ungodly amount of patience? Your fierce and protective love for your siblings? Your pride in yourself and your siblings? All of this inspires him, and he falls in love with you a little bit more every second he spends with you. Loving Simeon is very natural, very soft, and definitely domestic. He is very physically affectionate in private, but a little reserved in public. He adores cuddling with you anytime, whether it is while you are talking to each other, watching a movie, or its you playing a game on your phone while he reads or something. He knows you don't have a lot of free time, and likes to spend what time you do have with him plastered to your side. In public, he is not as clingy, but anyone who looks at him knows that he is completely head over heels for you. How? Because he is always at your side, his hand on the small of your back either guiding you somewhere or just resting there like a claim. His eyes never seem to wander from you, a content smile on his face.

Simeon likes doing things for you. So yes, he will do the laundry for you and clean up, just to see that radiant smile on your face. He likes playing with your hair, and falls in love with you all over again if you do it to him. One of the things he buys for you every time he goes shopping is hair accessories. One time he made a flower crown for you himself, then spelled it so the flowers wouldn't wilt. He is surprisingly innocent and boyish and just so, so in love with you~

Simeon is very supportive. No matter what you want to do, which career you want to choose, he is always there for you. He had been told his presence is soothing and comforting, and he wishes you feel the same way. That you feel comfortable and loved and cherished whenever you're with him, because you deserve the world. And he would love to give it to you on a silver platter.

*Please note that matchups are not open right now.

[papirouge]

What brought you to your faith in Jesus Christ?

I've always been "Christian" in the sense that my family is Christian and that I grew up with a basic knowledge of the Bible (we've always had a Bible in the house and we "occasionally" prayed or went to church) but it was mostly "cultural Christianism". I didn't have a true & authentic with Jesus - I didn't know Him at all.

That being said, now looking back at my life and the inexplicable events that either saved my life (long story short, my dad was abusive and -what I now know was- an angel warned my sister to hide the duplicate keys a few days before so that we could escape the house before he came back after he threatened to kill us all) or made me one way of another ALWAYS close of Christians, I now know God had a plan for my life SINCE DAY ONE.

For example, back in elementary school, my bff was a Catholic. I remember making fun of her for not watching TV shows with wicked/witchy themes but now I know she was right of course. I was just that typical bratty kid who thought she was smarter bc she didn't believe in this religious stuff lol I remember teasing her for believing in Creationism while the BIG BANG made so much more sense (wrong). And look at me now 🤣😭

In 2017 I went to Kenya and I befriended a pastor. I remember getting quite curious about true faith back then, and I witnessed the conversion of a former Muslim in the tiny church (that was a classroom) of the Christian community of the county. It was one of the most emotional moment of my life. I feel that at this moment God truly started to truly work on me......but I had a doubled mind so I also went to see a shaman who made me possessed by a few demons before I came back in France. From that moment, I felt a presence at night, and not feeling "right"... (It only after I got Saved and started listening to sermons online that I got rid of them)

Back in France I found a job (my dumb self thought it was thanks to the shaman LOL) as a receptionist and one of my colleague was a..... Christian woman!! (see how relentless God is??! xD). She was a former Muslim and that explains why I have a soft spot for former Muslim Christians or Arab Christians 💙 I was still very curious about God nonetheless so I asked her many questions about God, the Bible... We could talk for hours.... lol That's how I learnt the importance of discussion and education from Christians to unbelievers. I always think about her whenever I'm talking about Jesus to someone, hoping the holy spirit would use me as He did for her to Save me. That's also why I'm very angry at mean Christians being twats with sinners ; if that woman had behaved like some toxic/fake Christians out there, I would probably be still an unbeliever....

Fast forward, I got an emotional meltdown and implored God to SHOW ME He existed and make sense of the mess my current state of mind was at the time. And I kid you not that God LITERALLY answered to me. It's important to notice that when I begged for God it was absolutely not formal or dignified lol I was an utter mess but I truly think that God knew my heart was honest and that it came from a place of genuine longing for Him. We often hear ppl be like "I called for God but He never replied :/" well maybe it was because their heart wasn't in the right place to begin with?

Also note that at the place where I was working as a receptionist, one of the refectory guy was a....pastor, so the woman who drew me to Christ introduced me to him and for a bunch of weeks I went to the church he was doing the office at LOL (this experience put me on the railroads of Christan theology. I took a few theology classes and that's where I studiedme the 101 of apologetics)

See how God is literally PLOTTING TO GATHER HIS CHILDREN?? He knew that He was going to get me one day of another!! lol 😂 it took almost 3 decades for that but He really DID IT! GLORY TO HIS NAME!!!

[athena-is-a-chaotic-lil-shit]

Hi! I don't want to be a bother.You are a brilliant writer! I was wondering if you can give me some tips on writing. I've just started my blog (the-wife-of-an-orc) and have uploaded two works. I know I shouldn't get viewers right away but I really want it to work. My name's Lee btw nice to meet you.

Okay wait—

HOLY SHI— SOMEONE— A FELLOW WRITER AT THAT—

ORC WRITER

Just sent me an ASK- asking for writing tips???

Ohkay back to being normal—

Hi there Lee! Tis a pleasure to meet you! You're not bothering at all. In fact, I welcome any ask sent to me <3 it gets lonely here so everything, even a simple greeting is much appreciated!

I'm still a beginner writer myself, so I don't think I'll be able to give you some "amazing" tips in writing. But I can share a few things I've learned in the past month.

1. Purple prose/overwriting!

We've been made to think tht to be a writer, we need to use all those big fancy words...

Well, no. Not really. Simplicity is best! It's okay to repeat some words but again, don't go overboard. Moderation is key! Those big fancy words are alright too, but you don't have to use a different word everytime they do the same thing. Make sure to use a word that really correlates or is a synonym to your former word.

Also, don't use too much flowery words, aka adjectives with -ly suffixes. They're great, but don't overuse, it'll make your work amateurish. Use them in moderation!

2. Tense shifting!

Present tense, past tense, future tense, and the lot. Don't use multiple tenses! I mean, I use at least two tenses in my works but I shift according to grammar, and I did that only 2-3 times within the whole work. Be consistent. Pick one tense and stick to it. Don't go "I walked around the empty room, pacing back and forth as I wait for someone to come. I stop and sit on the chair that was my only companion. " Tense shifting galore!

Instead, go "I walked around the empty room, pacing back and forth as I waited for someone to come. I stopped when I tired myself out and moved to sit on a wooden stool that was my only companion."

3. Info-dumping~

Pretty self-explanatory. Avoid writing paragraphs and paragraphs of infos and facts like they've been copied from wikipedia and bang-slammed right in your story. That's one way to put it. But these also count; explanations of backstories and context.

Be concise! Be brief but also giving the reader a clue on what could've happened instead of detailing every single event of their past, like traumas or perhaps rape scenes. Please don't :D

Imply and let the readers' imagination run wild to figure that out. And then somewhere down the road in your work, your character will perhaps drop a sentence that confirms they're suspicions, make them go "I knew it!"

4. (Definitely the most useful advice I've got ever since and I still am working on it) TELLING!

Basically, a writer writes, and tells the story, but! Some of us tend to tell too much, and not let the reader experience the story. Quoting "Show don't tell." which most writers advice to amateur writers. Telling is info-dumping, telling is too much descriptive stuff, excessive adverbs and dialogue tags. Filtering is part of telling; which is the usage of words like: feel, see, hear, know, decide, assume, think, and all of their related tenses (e.g felt, saw, heard...)

Be direct. Though its okay to use them, but again, moderation is key!

Hope these helps! I'm still learning a lot everyday! I do suggest watching some videos in YouTube. I learned those from Alexa Donne. She's a professional writer and makes videos about amateur writing mistakes and writing tips! I'll leave you a link to her channel here. I'll try reading your posted works and see if I could give you little tips!

Goodluck Lee!

[graffitibible]

how do churn out fics so quickly? i feel like every month there's a new 35k word chapter out, meanwhile i've written 3 words on an empty doc 🤣 do you spend like 5 hours per day writing or are you just super fast?

OKAY REAL ANSWER 

basically, writing is very baked into my everyday schedule at this point lol. it was admittedly way easier before all this quarantine business started - my work gives me an hour long lunch and it takes me like 5 minutes to eat it and with virtually nothing else to do i just started bringing my laptop to work and banging out words there. now that my work hours have been drastically reduced, it’s harder for me to stay on task - i can bang out 3k words one day and only edit a stray sentence on another with no consistency whatsoever. 

i’m BIG on routine, so working writing into my daily routine more or less “tricks” me into being hyper-productive on it. there are certain periods in the day when im more productive, like the aforementioned long-ass lunch hour, but also like, when im making dinner or something. ive got to sit near the stove for like 30 minutes while im cooking some shit up to eat so thats thirty minutes to do some plot outlining or dialogue threading or editing or plain old writing. its not a whole lot of time but like when im working in my lunch hour, it works for me because its this window where i can trick myself into a burst of productivity in a condensed time frame without browbeating myself for not fulfilling a nonexistent standard. the amount of stuff i get done in those timeframes will honestly vary - sometimes its a paragraph and sometimes its a page. 

it also helps me personally to keep all my writing in textedit instead of a document that has an accessible wordcount or page count, so that way im not stressing about the length of the thing. this is also how i end up with like. 70k words crammed in one chapter and my pacing is SHIT because of it so thats not a sure thing by any means.

some people do daily wordcounts, which is a trick i do to keep myself working on my original fiction (i make myself write 200 words of original fiction per day, minimum. 200 shitty words isnt very much, and even if its not great, its some progress that i can go back to later.) but i dont apply the same tactic to fic, in part because i dont want my daily wordcount to feel overwhelming. 200 words is a simple, accessible goal for me even on days when im feeling like shit, and if i fall behind a day or two, its not an insurmountable barrier to overcome. its a good trick to kinda spur your brain into productivity. the downside to this is that youre basically playing a long con with yourself and theres a big chance that youll burn out on the project if youre stuck too long on it - ive been doing “200 words a day” for years at this point and ive written A Lot Of Stuff but not a lot of it is very refined because its a lot of words i have to go back and edit down.

wrt fic, i basically have multiple word docs open at all times so that they’re there and i can always turn things over in my head. this can sometimes feel like a big fucking “YOURE NOT DOING ENOUGH YOURE NOT BEING PRODUCTIVE” sword of damocles so that can be a double-edged thing that aint always so great. it usually works for me because its a good way to kickstart spontaneous bursts of creativity. ill always have these windows open, idly click into one, and go “oh hey thats a good sentence that ties in with this sentence” and then im writing again before im doing much active thought about it. if i spend too much time hyping myself up about “god i gotta get this done i have to do this now” then i start to dread the task so i try to eliminate that window whenever i can. 

LONG ANSWER IM SORRY. it comes down to me knowing my habits and my brain quirks and figuring out how to work with them as best as i can. im a routine-based person, so i built writing into my routine. i have memory issues, so if i get ideas at an inconvenient time i write em down to go back to em later. when executive dysfunction makes just starting to write feel insurmountable, i go back to what i wrote earlier and do editing instead. when im grappling with self-esteem and self-worth and i feel like my writing is flagging, i circle back to works i enjoy, both fanfic and published fiction, and study the writing styles of writers i admire for inspiration.

this is stuff that works for me personally! obviously every person is different and what works for some people aint gonna work for everybody. motivation issues are no fucking joke. its super tempting to like compare your pace of productivity to other peoples but honestly thatll just get you down. especially given current global events like, im lucky ive managed to be relatively productive during a Fucking Pandemic but some people wont be and that is COMPLETELY UNDERSTANDABLE, GIVEN THINGS. even then im certainly no stephen king. though i am also no george rr martin. in fact i think we can all take comfort in the fact that we are not george rr martin.

[movetothesuburbs]

@magneticghouls first of all... My ask box was apparently turned off so it's good to know I'm an idiot. Secondly thank you for asking

Season 1: Charlie Has Cancer. I love this so from the depths of my heart. The concept of it was like that first idea rcg had for the show. Nothing will ever be as relatable to me as Dennis trying to get out of that conversation as soon as possible. "You can talk to me any time" ... "Oh you meant now?" Fucking incredible.

Season 2: The Gang Exploits a Miracle. I'm gonna be honest s2 is my least fave season. The episodes are all pretty good. They just don't grip me as much. They are bastards to the best degree in this episode though. I've never been Catholic but I'm obsessed with the rituals and imagery. "Am I gay for God?" (Real talk I made a dream daddy meme to that) I love Charlie in all white and Mac in all black.

Season 3: The Gang Gets Whacked. Everything about this 2 parter is funny to me. (Except when I get sad abt Dennis) But! Pussy Hands. Peter Nincompoop. Jackie said she counted that Mac and Frank slap Dennis 13 times in a row and I love that. I think cocaine is funny. I think ruining Crucket's life further is funny. I think watching this ep after binging 5 episodes of the Sopranos is extra funny.

Season 4: It was very nearly Mac's Banging the Waitress but I am a sucker for a musical and a basic bitch so you know it's The Nightman Cometh. It was one of the first eps I ever saw. My best friend showed it to me then immediately showed me a live recording. I get Dayman stuck in my head often. I love Charlie. Also "I'm eating because I'm uncomfortable" Cat eyes Mac makes heart eyes Jack.

Season 5: Mac and Dennis Break Up. This was the first episode I ever saw. My bff was like "watch this they're gay" and by God were they. I think about the line "Far be it from me to keep the flower of you from flourishing" every goddamn day.

Season 6: Who Got Dee Pregnant? Admittedly I'm very soft for Dee Gives Birth, but I'm hella gay for Jimmi Simpson and Halloween. Also I love the reactions to if Mac had been the one. I am a sucker for characters telling conflicting accounts of the same event. I think Dennis looked hot as Luigi and think he could have worked that without a Mario just fine, he just wanted a couples costume with Mac. I will not encourage incest shippers, but Dennis thinking he might have gotten Dee pregnant is the funniest gd thing.

Season 7: The High School Reunion. I love far Mac with all my heart and if I saw that man at a high school reunion I do not care what rep he had in high school I would be on that. Also irl I had a crush on the high school drug dealer so what are standards? I love Dee immediately jumping on being the nastiest meanest bitch ever. I love the dance at the end. I think Tim and Dennis made out in high school. I'm gay for Jason Sudeikis so seeing Schmitty show up was beautiful. Cricket..... Was there. My only regret is that I already knew Mac's legal name is Ronald McDonald so I did not get to experience that reveal as a fresh concept.

Season 8: The Gang Dines Out. Did you ever know that you're my hero? I love endings where the gang appreciates Dee. Episodes that take place in one set are always great. The Waiter is great. Frank and Charlie havin' an anniversary 💙 Dennis did not have to give that speech in front of a crowd. He was going to tell Mac all those things just to his face. But he needed that whole restaurant to know who the real hero is. Dennis Reynolds said fuck the troops. I still don't know what a Groupon is. Also that table being so close to the kitchen door probably violates OSHA guidelines but thay's not a part of why I like the episode, just an observation.

Season 9: The Gang Saves the Day. I love seeing characters just imagine fantasy scenarios. Dee's is inspirational but should have been gayer. Mac is... Stupid but I love him with my whole heart and I support him imagining Dennis crying over his corpse. All hail our mighty and buff Lord. Love Dennis saying he'd rather die than have a broken dick. I love that Charlie's is animated. He is so small. There are two genders: janitor or waitress. The most relatable is Frank tho. You eat those hotdogs bitch

Season 10: The Gang Goes on Family Fight. I'm a slut for Argyle sweater vests and Dennis having a mental breakdown. Also Charlie being one of the survey takers was priceless.

Season 11: It should come as no surprise that my favorite of this season (and the series as a whole) is Mac and Dennis Move to the Suburbs. I love every single moment of this episode. I love the breakdown of their sanity. Rage fuels me. People think Dennis is a psychopath but who in this episode is feeding their roommate a dead dog? Not Dennis. What would be different if Dennis was the house husband? You know Wally just wanted to be nice to the gay couple that moved next door but they acted Like That. I'd love to make a longer post just about this episode. Some guy in fb was like "the seasons sucked after sesson 8" and everyone was like "okay but suburbs in season 11 tho" and they guy was like "okay u right" Suburbs is the episode that brings the gays and straights together and will bring us world peace

Season 12: This wss hard cuz I think this is my favorite season overall. And I'm gonna be real controversial here and let you know my fave ep is Dennis' Double Life. I love the concept. I love the convoluted scheme. I would die for Mandy. I know there's a lot with real life stuff happening and how it affected things after but I wanna appreciate it as is. Sometimes you juat have so many big feelings that you run away to North Dakota to be a dad I guess. "I'm the lover obviously" "I have a good plan but you wouldn't listen to it anyway" Did I mention I love Mandy? Maybe it's that I grew up in the Midwest but I understand her on such a deep level. I love this episode so much.

Season 13: The Gang Solves the Bathroom Problem. Every time I go into a bathroom I just think "animal shithouse" nonbinary/genderfluid Charlie rights. Hawaiin shirts. I also love Jimmy Buffett. I love they all sing the wrong song. "As a straight man" in the least convincing way. This episode speaks to me on all levels.

[darley1101]

Say You Won’t Let Go (Nov 2 Music)

A/N For the November prompt challenge hosted by @meeraaverywalker November 2: Music featuring Katarina Vance and Parker Shaw from It Live Beneath. Combined with first kiss while slow dancing, a night kiss with a promise, and 'Why are you looking at me like that?' Requested by @blackcatkitaTags are at the end of the story. If you would like to be added, moved, or removed please let me know. If you enjoyed the story please consider giving it a like, comment or re-blog. Thank you for reading.

Rating/warning: Mature due to slight sexual innuendos.

Side note: for those who are into this sort of thing, the song Kat and Parker are dancing to:  Say You Won't Let Go   

Say You Won't Let Go

Drawing her bare legs up beneath her, Katarina leaned against the rail and stared down at the deceptively peaceful water lapping at the sides of the boat. She didn't know what Imogen was thinking, hosting another party on her parents yacht so soon after Kyle's death. It just felt wrong. It also felt like they were asking for trouble. 'I shouldn't have come,' Katarina thought, her fingers absentmindedly toying with the frayed hem of her denim shorts. She'd been on the verge of declining the invitation when Imogen mentioned that Parker was going to be off duty and able to come have fun for once. Like some love sick school girl, Katarina had quickly accepted. It had been a mistake. Parker hadn't spoken more than two words to her and she couldn't shake the guilt or unease for attending a party that felt very much like the one where Kyle had died.

“Hey.”

At the sound of Parker's voice, Katarina drew her gaze from the water. Her traitorous heart sped up, fueled by a love sick adrenaline rush. “Hey,” she echoed. The fingers plucking at the fraying on her shorts picked up speed, tangling in the white threads. She didn't know how to react to his sudden attention. The last time they had been alone together she had made a fool of herself by flirting with him and asking him for coffee. He'd quickly shot her down, citing work as the reason. It had been a plausible excuse, one that didn't completely put her off since he'd followed it by suggesting they exchange numbers. Not that he ever contacted her. Which made her coming to the party because he was going to be there even more pathetic.

“Why are you looking at me like that?”

The question caught Katarina off guard. Her brows drew together, confusion clouded her eyes. “Like what?”

“Like you're confused about why I'm talking to you.” He nudged her foot with his own, a playful grin stretching across his full, kissable lips. Full, kissable lips? It took every ounce of Katarina's will power not to gag. Since when was she that girl? The one who noticed things like how kissable a guy's lips were? Looks had never factored into what attracted her to a guy. Her ex-boyfriend Gary had been cute enough, in a Sheldon from The Big Bang Theory sort of way, but it had been his quirky sense of humor that drew her in. Ironically enough, it was that same quirky humor that pushed her away. Well, that and the fact that he'd made her first and only sexual experience awful. There had been no foreplay, no loving kisses. Just Gary lubing up with some KY and sticking it in. His reasoning had been the first time was going to suck no matter what so why not just get it over with so they could get to the good stuff. He hadn't thought about how painful it would be for her or how she might not appreciate his little jokes about needing practice. 'Why are you thinking about that loser,' she silently scolded herself. She knew the answer. It was Parker and his kissable lips.

“I'm not confused,” Katarina lied. Everything about Parker confused her. His hot and cold demeanor. The way he made her feel. It would be easier if she was the sort of girl who could just point blank ask a guy how he felt, what his intentions were. She didn't have that sort of bravery in her. Jumping in to save Kyle and then trying to get justice for Ned had been anomalies, she didn't usually have that much courage.

“Good because most girls don't understand about my no flirting while on the clock rule.” He dropped down next to her, his muscular thigh pressing against her slimmer one. “It probably seems silly, but I'm the youngest and the newest...a lot of the older officers are just waiting for me to screw up.” Parker glanced at her, his grin widening, “you should know...not flirting with you has been the hardest thing I've done in a while.”

“Really?” Her heart skipped a beat before accelerating to triple time when he nodded. Katarina chewed her lower lip and then let out a sigh. “Parker, I'm really not very understanding. I mean, I am. I totally get why you don't flirt while you're on the clock. I just...I didn't realize you were serious about that and...” she shrugged, her cheeks flushing.

“And you thought I wasn't interested.” She nodded. “Kat, if I wasn't interested I wouldn't have given you my phone number or asked for yours.”

Katarina felt her cheeks flush even more. “I thought you were being polite. Besides...you never text or called me. What was I supposed to think?”

“You could have text me,” Parker pointed out. “That's why I gave you my number. Plus, I've been busy.” He glanced around before lowering his voice. “I talked to Ned after you came into the station the other day. He wasn't acting like himself and he was definitely favoring his left side...like he'd hurt himself or-”

“Or been stabbed,” Katarina finished breathlessly. The fact that Parker had taken her seriously when she'd burst into the station announcing that Ned had been stabbed to death, only for Ned to walk out of the Chief's office very much alive, was huge. Parker had no reason to trust her, she wouldn't have blamed him for writing her off as crazy after that incident, but he'd taken her at her word and looked into it. “Parker, I-”

“Guys,” Imogen cried, dancing towards them, “it's a party!” She grabbed Katarina by the hand, pulling her to her feet. “Dance with me! You too Parker!”

“I don't dance,” Katarina protested, glancing over her shoulder at Parker. He smiled and then shrugged before moving his body in time to the music. 'Of course he's a good dancer,' she thought, trying to coordinate her body with the rhythm of the song. It was one she recognized and had occasionally danced to in the privacy of her dorm room. Who didn't dance when Kesha came on?

“This place about to blow-oh-oh-oh,” Imogen sang, shaking her hair out of her face and shrieking with laughter. It was a relief to see something other than sadness on the other girl's face. The memory of Kyle was hovering just beneath the surface, it was written in her eyes, but she wasn't going to let it define how she lived. “Come on, Kat! Sing it with me!”

Katarina shook her head. “Hard pass.” The only thing worse than her dancing was her singing. Her freshmen roommate had dragged her to a charity Karoke event and basically forced her on to the stage, where she was promptly booed off before she could reach the chorus of Miley Cyrus' Party In The USA.

“Dance with me?” Parker pulled her close as the music transitioned into a slow ballad. Heart pounding, Katarina raised her arms and looped them around Parker's neck. Beneath his light gray t shirt she could feel his heart thumping triple time. She closed her eyes, trying to concentrate on the lyrics of the song instead of how amazing it felt to have Parker's hands resting on her hips. I met you in the dark, you lit me up. You made me feel as though I was enough. We danced the night away... “There's just something about you,” he murmured against her ear. Her eyes fluttered open, their gazes locking. She felt her breathing starting to accelerate when his head dipped just slightly. “Kat...” The way he whispered her name sent tingles throughout her body. It was unlike anything she'd ever felt. She closed her eyes, her breathe hitching when his lips brushed across hers. It was innocent enough, just a whisper of flesh against flesh, yet there was something hot and demanding as well...a promise of more. “Kat,” he whispered again. His left hand slid up the side of her body, stirring awareness, before sliding into her wavy dark hair. His fingers rest just below her ear, his thumb gently rubbing across her cheek bone as their breathes mingled. He used his other arm to pull her closer, sealing the gap between their bodies. It felt right, the way each curve and valley fit together perfectly.

“Ahem.”

Katarina jumped back, her cheeks blazing with color as she turned to face Imogen. There was a curious mixture of amusement and jealousy in her friend's golden brown eyes. “I hate to break things  up, but my mom called. We have to dock the boat,” Imogen sulked. “Apparently Daddy is pushing for new restrictions about drinking on the lake and it wouldn't look good for his daughter to be throwing a party...especially so soon after an alcohol involved drowning.” Tears brimmed her lashes. “Did she really have to bring up Kyle like that? She made it sound like...like I don't care.”

“I'm sure she didn't mean it like that,” Katarina tried to reassure her but a quick glance at Parker's grimace told her that Imogen's mom probably had meant it like that. “I'm sorry Im.”

“It's not your fault.” Imogen let out a frustrated sigh. 

“Thanks for coming though. I know you were a little hesitant...so I just...I appreciate what a good friend you are Katarina. I don't have many of those left.” The smaller girl impulsively engulfed Katarina in a hug. “Please be careful with Parker,” she whispered lowly. “He's a nice guy but he's got a bit of a reputation for being a flirt. I don't think I've ever seen him get serious with anyone.”

The words were like cold water being thrown in  her face. Everything in Katarina froze. She forced a smile before pulling back. “I'm always careful,” she promised. “It's my middle name. Well, not really, but...it could be.”

“Lunch tomorrow?”

Katarina nodded, shoving her hands into the back pockets of her shorts. Her mile faded when Imogen left to relay the news to the rest of her guests. She should have known Parker was a player. 'Not a player,' an inner voice chided, 'a flirt. There is a difference.' Was there though? Katarina wasn't exactly naive when it came to men but she wasn't all that experienced either. “You have that confused look on your face again,” Parker said softly.

“Oh.” She ducked her head down, studying the apricot colored polish on her toes. “Sorry. I was just thinking.”

“About what Imogen said?” Katarina's head jerked up, her eyes widening. Parker let out a small chuckle and then sighed. “She's not very good at whispering.” He let out another sigh, walking the short distance to the rail. He stared out at the water before turning to face her. “Can I just be blunt?” She hesitated for a moment before nodding. “Pine Spring is a small town. People tend to mistaken friendliness for flirting. I'm not saying I don't flirt...I do...just not as much as people claim. As for never being serious with someone...I guess I've never met the right someone.” His voice lowered, the gold flecks in his hazel eyes intensifying. “Until now.”

Conflict warred with desire. She'd already been through one crummy relationship that had left her sad, disillusioned, and wear. Did she really want to take that risk again? Her mind kept drifting back to the kiss that wasn't quite a kiss. There had been real feeling there...on both of their parts. She hadn't just imagined that. Katarina glanced in Imogen's direction. She knew Imogen meant well, that she was trying to be a good friend, but she also knew Parker was telling the truth. 'You have enough regrets in your life, do you really want to add Parker to that list?'  The answer was simple. She was tired of regrets. If there was one thing she had learned from her parents deaths and the strangeness going on in Pine Springs it was that life was short. Too short really. “Hey Parker,” she said softly, “I like you too. Besides...” she smiled sweetly, “you still owe me a dance.”

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[jelloapocalypse]

Huh, why is it that you dislike Code Lyoko so much? Most people I know either have never heard of it (most people, really), or absolutely love it (it is personally in my top 10 cartoons along with Danny Phantom). I've honestly seen very few people that dislike it at let, alone drastically. Its definitely not a perfect show despite how much I like it, so what about it is it that you dislike?

Okay soI honestly don’t know where to start.

Code Lyoko has no good qualities past its catchy theme song. Every single one of the leads is a bad character, the show does that French Animation staple of not actually explaining or establishing the plot, stakes, setting, or motives of ANYONE, which is always baffling to me considering how easy that should be for a monster of the week show.

XANA’s plans are a random roulette of competence and scale. In some episodes he takes control of a teddy bear to harass some random students while in others he attempts to crash a bus into a nuclear power plant and cause a meltdown a la Chernobyl. The characters react similarly to every single event. XANA not having a consistant physical representation (until later on at least) leads to him being a non-villain, which is the worst kind. How did the kids come upon this factory? We don’t know. Where does any of this shit come from and how does it work? We don’t know that either. And that can be fine, but if you’re going to keep us in the dark about that stuff you need a good cast to carry your show, which Code Lyoko does not come close to having.

The leads are all hysterically bad (aside from Odd, who is comparatively passable) and their motivations and hang ups change by the episode. They get to live each set of events twice due to the time reversal at the end of each episode (though they usually act like they don’t remember this luxury exists and never plan around it?). Sometimes the way they use the time reversal is... very suspect. For example in the episode Big Bug (an episode that does not contain bugs of any size) Sissi reveals to the school staff that Odd is keeping a dog in his dorm, which is against school rules. She does this because they pull a prank on her. When they get a second chance at the situation instead of simply not pulling the prank, they trick Herb into sexual assaulting her! What likable people!

Jeremy spends his time being creepily obsessed with materializing and banging his computer girlfriend Aelita to the point he puts his friends in danger on multiple occasions.

Yumi has next to no personality and Ulrich has actually no personality. The show constantly flip flops back and forth between “they both know they like each other!” and “they have absolutely no idea” by the episode. It’s very confusing. Again, romantic B-plots are fine, but only provided I like the characters. I can’t do that when they’re basically large foreheaded cardboard cut-outs.

Odd is passable, but this is likely because he is the only cast member with a shred of personality to his name.

Both the animation and music budget is very limited and it constantly shows. This is not helped by the fact that the writing and dub work averages a D- on a good day.

Like look at this graphic design trainwreck. The characters’ heads are clipping into the bottom part of the text in the credits every time I see this shot I want to throw up aaaAAAAGH

Because the plot is always solved by “We need to get Aelita to a tower” once you’ve seen one episode you’ve basically seen the second half of every single one. The battles in Lyoko never carry any weight. Life points, weapons on hand, and monster count are all arbitrary since we don’t know how anything works. Nothing is established, it’s just a bunch of boring teens in digi-spandex shooting at a crab that the show’s soundtrack seems to imply is VERY scary when the solution is getting The Pink Hair One past it. They imply Aelita can’t take damage or she dies, but this isn’t true, so it’s very confusing why they constantly sacrifice themselves for her.

There’s also a million other little problems that aren’t coming to mind since it’s been about 3 months since I’ve watched an episode with Lamp.

I dunno. It should be said, if you LIKE Code Lyoko that’s fine. I like Totally Spies, and that show sucks. I’ve just never actually heard anyone list a legitimate reason that this show is good, despite hearing a lot of people defend it. Like, why would you watch this show over say... I dunno, anything else.