#Joani Bye

[earl-grey-love]

Made my blog and carrd all pretty to match my current taste 💜

[estrellami-1]

Keep You Company

So this happened because 1) I was babysitting and the little girl wouldn’t sleep until I laid in bed with her and my heart has NEVER been more full and 2) my dad’s an audio engineer with a home studio and my mom will just???? Sit in there with him????? He’s got a couch for when clients come over but 90% of the time if I can’t find either of my parents they’re both in there. I love my mom but I swear she’s tone deaf. Not to mention if any of you have heard someone else work on pitch correction you KNOW how annoying it can get after roughly .3 seconds. But she sits in there completely content because they just???? Want to be near each other????? After close to 30 years of marriage????? Where can I find someone who loves me the way my parents love each other. And the way Steve and Eddie love each other. Please.

Also side note if any of yall read Little Love I’m tempted to make this a future excerpt 👀 different name bc who knows if anything’s gonna come of this. and Joanie’s name comes from Joan Jett anyone who got that gets a gold star ⭐️ also Joanie is either 4 or 6. Idk which. But she’s one of those ages. Which if you know anything about kids you know there’s somehow no difference and yet every difference in the world between those two ages.

“Night, Daddy,” Joanie says, moving into Eddie’s studio to drop a kiss onto his cheek. “Love you.”

Eddie startles away from the computer screen, blinking as he realizes just how late it already is. The clock on his desk blinks 9:08 in red, incriminating flashes.

He smiles at his daughter and throws his arms around her as he stands, hugging her to himself and whirling them around the space, careful around the low coffee table. “Goodnight, my little rockstar!” He crows, peppering kisses to her cheeks and forehead, feeling laughter bubble up inside him in response to Joanie’s giggles.

“Daddy!” She shrieks, but doesn’t try to pull away. He laughs and finally puts her down, pressing one last kiss to the crown of her head as he kneels in front of her.

“Night, Joanie-bug,” he murmurs. “Sorry I’ve been stuck in here all day. I wish I could just play with you all day instead.”

He boops her nose and she giggles. “What are you doing?”

Eddie hums and picks her up, moving closer to the computer to save his project. “Well, y’know how Daddy’s in a band?”

“Yuh-huh.”

“Well sometimes, Uncle Gareth gets a note wrong.”

Joanie giggles. “Only Uncle Gareth?”

“Only Uncle Gareth,” Eddie agrees in a super-serious way that they both know he doesn’t mean.

“And sometimes Daddy forgets how not to be a perfectionist,” Steve adds from the doorway with a smile.

“Also very true,” Eddie nods, putting his computer to sleep. “But I did a lot of work today, so hopefully I should be done soon. How about for now, I do bedtime clean-up routine, and Papa can read you your book?”

“M’kay,” Joanie says happily, because she’s a heathen and prefers Steve’s storytelling skills over Eddie’s. Eddie wants to bite her cheeks, she’s so cute, so he does, takes a big chomp and makes a dinosaur noise that has Joanie shrieking and laughing.

“Okay, munchkin,” he says, swinging her around onto his back and trotting through the house, purposely jostling her. “Beddy-bye time, which means it’s time for teeth brushing!”

“Can you sing the song?”

Eddie fights back a groan. Somehow, he’d forgotten this was coming. “Sure thing, Joanie. Let’s get some toothpaste on that brush, alright?”

They do, and Joanie looks at him expectantly. “Sing it, Daddy! Sing it!”

“Brush your teeth, up and down. Brush your teeth, ‘round and ‘round. Brush your teeth from left to right, brush your teeth in the morning and night.”

He goes through the entire song, helpless to the smile that grows as Joanie bops happily along to his singing. “Okay, baby bug,” he says finally, standing behind her with a brush. “How d’you want your hair tonight?”

Regardless of the rat’s nest it will be in the morning, Joanie refuses to sleep if her hair is at all in her face. Steve and Eddie started with simple braids until she discovered the magic of YouTube tutorials, which makes the bedtime routine both longer and less mundane.

“Two Elsa braids,” she says, resolutely not learning the proper name and instead using the one Eddie had jokingly said once.

“Two Elsa braids, coming up,” he says, because it’s cute and he’s not going to dissuade her.

“Can we do beads?”

“Beads are a daytime hairstyle, ‘member, munchkin?”

Joanie pouts at him in the mirror. “But they’re pretty!”

“They are pretty, but they won’t stay while you sleep. They’ll fall out, and then you’ll wake up in the middle of the night ‘cause you’re laying on beads, and you’ll wake us up, and then we’ll all be cranky.” Not that that exact thing had happened.

She narrows her eyes at him, trying to find a way around it, then finally huffs and agrees. “Okay.”

“You’ll look pretty even without the beads,” Eddie promises her. “And Elsa doesn’t have beads, remember?”

“Yeah, but Daddy, Elsa’s got magic powers!”

“That she does.”

Joanie pretends to shoot Eddie with her Elsa powers, and Eddie freezes in the middle of the first braid. “I can’t move,” he says, not moving his lips. “You froze me!”

Joanie giggles. “Unfreeze, Daddy!”

He dramatically relaxes and sighs. “Oh, good! Thank you!”

He finishes doing her hair and chases her into her room, where she picks out her pajamas: a pink shirt with ballet-dancing kittens, and a neon-green pair of leggings. “Bold choice,” Eddie comments. “You wanna do it yourself? Or do you want me to help you?”

“I wanna do it,” Joanie says, just like Eddie knew she would.

A few minutes later, she huffs, frustrated. “Daddy, help,” she asks, just like Eddie knew she would.

He helps rescue her from her shirt that had somehow become sentient long enough to wrap around her head, then gets her pants on and tucks her into bed before pressing a long, loud kiss to her forehead. “Nighty-night, Joanie-bug,” he murmurs. “Don’t let the bedbugs bite.”

Joanie giggles. “Only Joanie-bugs allowed in my bed!” She declares, and Eddie chuckles. “That’s right.”

He moves toward the door where Steve’s waiting to press a kiss to his husband’s forehead. “Sorry I was so busy.”

“You were working,” Steve murmurs. “It’s fine. I’ll come join you when I’m done, m’kay?”

“I’m gonna be in the studio for at least another hour tonight, babe,” Eddie says apologetically.

“Then I guess I’ll come keep you company.” He presses a quick kiss to Eddie’s lips before shoving him out the door. “Go work, I’ll be there in a bit.”

“Sir yes sir,” Eddie salutes, marching back to his studio.

The next time he surfaces, it’s to a tugging at his sleeve. He blinks, glances at the clock—10:37—and turns, ready to apologize to Steve, only to see Joanie.

A quick look reveals no Steve anywhere in the studio, so Eddie thinks he’s probably in bed. “Hey, munchkin,” he murmurs, picking her up and setting her in his lap. “We put you to bed an hour ago, what’s going on? Bad dream?”

Joanie shakes her head before resting it on Eddie’s shoulder. “Papa’s snoring.”

Eddie blinks. Steve does snore, but not loud enough she should be able to hear it from her room. “Oh,” he says quietly. “Did he fall asleep before finishing the story?”

Joanie nods against his shoulder, and he sighs as he cuddles her closer, once again saving his project before completely shutting the computer down for the night. “M’kay, Joanie-bug, let’s go get Papa into his own bed.”

“Daddy?” She asks on the way to her room.

“Yeah, baby?”

“Why’s Papa so tired?”

Eddie sighs. “He’s a teacher, sweet pea. He does a lot all day. And he loves his job, but it is very tiring. Then he comes home and cooks, ‘cause he’s better at it than I am. And there’s a lot of stuff that needs to be done around the house.”

Joanie’s quiet for a second. “And me?” She finally asks.

Eddie’s heart stutters painfully. “No, baby,” he murmurs. “Your Papa and I love you, so much, okay?”

“Okay,” Joanie agrees, wrapping her arms around his neck. “I love you too, Daddy.” After a few seconds of thought, she says, “Are there cooking videos on YouTube? Like for hair?”

Eddie blinks. “To learn how to do it? Yeah, I think so.”

Joanie nods. “You should watch those. And cook for Papa.”

Eddie chuckles. “Maybe I will,” he agrees, stopping short in the doorway to smile at the sight in front of him.

The bedside lamp is on and Steve, glasses askew, is halfway on the bed, on top of the covers. The book is open in his lap, hands still holding on to the sides. He is, as Joanie had said, snoring.

Eddie kisses Joanie’s forehead and puts her into bed beside Steve before taking the book from Steve’s lax hands, shutting it and putting it on her bedside table before kissing Steve’s forehead. “Stevie, baby,” he murmurs. “Wake up.”

Steve’s eyebrows scrunch and his eyes flutter beneath his closed lids before he takes an extra-deep breath and his eyes open. “Eds?” He murmurs. “What’s wrong?”

“You’ve gotta get up,” Eddie murmurs. “This isn’t your bed.”

He watches as Steve processes his words then looks around. He sees the confusion morph into understanding when he sees Joan. “Oh,” Steve murmurs. “Sorry, Joanie.”

“‘S okay, Papa,” Joanie answers. “You should go to bed.”

Steve chuckles tiredly and kisses her forehead. “I am, right now,” he promises. “Night, Joanie.”

“Night, Papa. Night, Daddy!”

“Night, Joanie-bug,” Eddie answers, wrapping his arm around Steve’s waist, half as a hug and half to help his husband stay steady.

“Sorry, Eds,” Steve murmurs. “Meant to join you.”

“It’s alright,” Eddie promises. “How about tomorrow I take Joanie out early for breakfast and let you sleep in?”

Steve frowns. “But you have work.”

“I’ve done the majority of it already,” Eddie answers. “You could take her out tomorrow afternoon if you want. Or just have a movie marathon here. I’ll finish up what I have to do. Tomorrow’s Saturday, right? So I’ll finish tomorrow, then Sunday I can make waffles for all of us. How’s that sound?”

Steve hums. “Good, ‘sides the you cooking part of it.”

“Oh, you little shit,” Eddie says delightedly, pressing a kiss to Steve’s temple. “Just you wait, you’ll understand the power of YouTube tutorials.”

Steve chuckles, quiet, tired, but no less full of love. “I can’t wait.”

Permanent Taglist (which I’ve been COMPLETELY terrible at I’m so sorry I promise I’ll try to do better): @justforthedead89 @ilovecupcakesandtea @madigoround @bookbinderbitch @suddenlyinlove @nburkhardt @artiststarme @paintsplatteredandimperfect @i-less-than-three-you @alyelf @quarble @messrs-weasley @littlewildflowerkitten @vankaar @starman-jpg @bornonthesavage @steddie-there @goodolefashionedloverboi @andienotannie @cinnamon-mushroomabomination @platinum-sunset @just-ladyme @steddiestains @swimmingbirdrunningrock @imhereforthelolzdontyellatme @martinskis-lydias @notaqueenakhaleesi @sleepyboosstuff @bestwifehaver @m-owo-n @thatonebadideapanda @finalmoondragon @velocitytimes2 @callmeanythjing @ajeff855 @ilikeititspretty @knitsforthetrail @sillysparrow @that-one-corvid @ace-is-bored @muricel @harpymoth @weirdandabsurd42

[shares-a-vest]

Fruity Four Advent Calendar, Day 19: A Miracle

Prompt List

It will be a goddamn Christmas miracle if Steve and Eddie can get a full night's sleep with their daughter, Joanie, practically bouncing off the walls with excitement on Christmas Eve... Between calls from Robin, a late-night pop-in from Nancy with Christmas supplies, their menagerie of cats and Eddie trying to assemble Joanie's dollhouse, it's shaping up to be a long night of sleeplessness.

Word Count: 3200

Guys I've totally fallen off doing these prompts. Had crippling anxiety all last week bc I was going for Christmas lunch with my dad and I've been super down since. Shouts to anyone who has to deal with shitty parents this Christmas. Love you, you've got this 💖💖💖

'Operation Dollhouse'

Joanie tugs at the phone cord once again and, to save it from completely ripping out of the wall, Steve jumps up from the couch to follow the excited toddler around the living room. He really didn't want to have to move the couch on Christmas Eve to reach the socket. Joanie gestures wildly with her free hand, bobbing her head along with faint hums as she listens to Robin, presumably talking a mile a minute.

Robin's call was her fourth phone call of the day and the third interruption in Steve's attempt to get his three-year-old daughter into bed. She’s been practically bouncing off the walls since November when the first signs of Christmas started to appear (far too early displays at the grocery store and Christmas music on the radio the day after Thanksgiving) and now the energy is in overdrive.

"And Pa's coming in the morning!" she excitedly announces like Robin hasn't spent ten years' worth of celebrations in the same general vicinity as Wayne Munson. "And he promised to take me out in the snow."

She makes an attempt to climb up on her little pouffe by the window but Steve stops her, scooping her up with one arm.

"Nope, we are not climbing up to the window."

Joanie laughs, letting her hand holding the phone fall, slumping under Steve’s arm as he marches her back to the couch (and closer to the phone socket).

"Daddy just picked me up," she yells into the phone through giggles.

He plops her down on the couch and resumes his seat with a heavy sigh as Joanie straightens up, holding the phone to her ear once more.

"Alright, enough," Steve says, flailing to sound stern enough as he desperately tries to wind the conversation down. He sticks a hand out for the phone as Joanie stares him down with just as much seriousness.

"Bye, bye, Robbie. See you at Christmas," she says cheerily and hands over the phone at a glacial pace.

Disappointment fills her big, dark-brown eyes with the theatrics that only Eddie Munson's daughter could possibly possess. She cuddles into Steve's side, probably sulking, as he attempts to untangle the coiled phone cord.

"Ugh, Rob?" he starts, giving up and deciding to just talk with a limited cord length. "I gotta get her to bed."

"But my precious bean and I are having our girl talk!"

Joanie practically rolls off the couch and runs across the living room to the Christmas tree, stopping dead in front of it to look it over, glee twinkling in her eyes.

"You'll have all day tomorrow for that. I've been trying to get her to bed for two hours," Steve mumbles, still trying to convey his annoyance as covertly as possible.

"Where's Munson?"

He can't help but snort a laugh at the thought of Eddie in the garage, still, trying to assemble the dollhouse Joanie was getting from Santa.

"Still hard at work on the D-O-L-L-H-O-U-S-E?" Robin answers for him teasingly, rapid-fire spelling and cackling.

"Yes," he says, side-eyeing Joanie as she carefully examines the presents under the tree.

"Oh, I'll be teasing him tomorrow. Alrighty, Steve, love you. And don't you get up too early to start in the kitchen! Just chill the fuck out."

"Love you," he smiles and hangs up the phone, mustering any parental authority he has left from Christmas-time exhaustion.

"Joanie," he begins, cradling the phone in his lap. "It's bedtime. Go brush your teeth."

Surprisingly, she nods and heads for the bathroom. Despite the lack of protest, Steve doesn’t expect much. The same had happened before Robin called, panicking once more about exactly what she was bringing over for Christmas lunch. He busies himself with rearranging the couch cushions, always in a state of disarray after Joanie has been squirming around while talking on the phone.

He's about to head into the bathroom to check on the tooth brushing progress when Nancy comes fumbling in the front door, bags in hand and balancing a pie under her arm as she tries to unjangle the spare key from the front door lock.

"Help!" she says as she makes fleeting eye contact she with Steve.

He rushes to her, taking a bag and the pie, allowing her to yank the key from the sticking doorknob.

"Have you been at work?" he asks, incredulous as they enter the kitchen.

"The news never stops," she retorts with a tight-lipped smile as she sets her bags down on the cramped kitchen island and places her hands over them to explain. "Okay, I have my mother's pie recipe, the P-R-E-S-E-N-T-S. Well, some of them at least. Robbie is still wrapping hers. And wine."

She beams at that last part and Steve knows that his house is another stopover on Nancy and Robin’s busy, alcohol-fueled, seemingly never-ending December festivities as they party-hop all month long.

"I’m pre-preparing for Robin having a meltdown tomorrow, so I thought I’d just drop in my side of things to make it easier on myself," she continues, slipping the bag filled with presents down between the kitchen barstools, concealing them from curious not-so-little toddler eyes. "I’d really like us to have at least some relaxation in the morning over breakfast before the panic sets in."

Steve laughs, "She just called."

"Nancy!" Joanie gasps, standing at the line between the kitchen linoleum and the wood flooring.

"Are you still up?" Nancy teases, propping a hand on her hip and chancing a sly smirk at Steve.

"And we were just going to bed," he smiles sarcastically, making for the young girl. But she folds her arms in protest, the separation in flooring becoming, as it so often did, a battleground.

"Where is Daddy?"

"In the garage, honey."

She narrows her eyes, too much like Eddie for her own good. His absence had drawn suspicion all day, and there were only so many excuses Steve could concoct.

"He needs to read me a story," she insists.

"You already got a story. But I'll go get him to tuck you in."

She purses her lips, probably weighing up the bargain, eventually offering, "Can Nancy tuck me in?"

Before he can answer, Nancy picks her up.

"I can absolutely do that."

Steve mouths a, “thank you” as she passes him to move down the short hallway to Joanie's bedroom. He clamours for the radio on the kitchen counter, thinking, this is it. Joanie is finally going to sleep.

Dustin would probably give Steve and Eddie a lecture if he knew they used the emergency radios basically as a paging system between the apartment and their designated garage across the alleyway. Typically it was Eddie's studio but right now most of his music equipment was shoved to the side, making way for the dollhouse. The dollhouse that had taken him all week to assemble. And they still had to bring it upstairs and place the furniture in it.

"How's it going, Edward the Elf? Over."

"Fudge-off, Steve!"

"Eds, Nancy is helping Joanie into bed. And need I remind you, you have to say, ‘over’. Over."

"This is fucking bullshit, over."

"Can you come up and tuck Joanie in, she absolutely will not accept less than both of us."

"Fine. But, dude. I need your help."

Steve can feel his begging puppy eyes through the radio.

Nancy gets Joanie into bed without issue which, to Steve, is some combination of frustrating (considering he wrangles children for a living at preschool), a bruising to his super-parent ego and, ultimately, being thankful. Although, her persuasiveness is a continuing mark of her unwavering authority and Steve can’t argue with that. It has literally saved their lives time and again, after all. Eddie makes a flying appearance, hair frizzed in a messy bun and clearly half-stoned. He grumbles something about the garage being, "Santa’s fucking workshop" on his way out which leaves Nancy in hysterics.

Despite his clear grouchiness, Steve and Nancy can’t help but take a trip down to the apartment building’s garages to taunt him a little before Nancy heads off across the city.

"Why are you smoking?" he asks, immediately plucking the joint from between Eddie's lips and taking it for himself.

"Because I want to rip this stupid thing to pieces with my bare hands!" he says, voice deepening into his Dungeon Master voice as he shakes his fists.

Steve had bought the bare-bones dollhouse two months ago, deciding on a wooden one that they could customise to Joanie’s liking. Besides, they didn’t think whichever Dreamhouse Barbie had on offer this year would have unicorn-themed wallpaper in the bathroom or a bedroom for the plastic spiders Eddie had purchased as stand-ins for Joanie’s spider plushie collection. Steve still has no clue where Eddie and Robin had managed to find them. Like everything he did, Eddie went all out on decorating, subtly quizzing their daughter on interior design choices and then fashioning the house to her preferences.

Eddie turns around and grins.

"But I'm done now," he adds, turning back to the dollhouse with a miniature rocking chair and delicately placing it in the Christmas-themed living room.

"Eds," Steve chuckles. "How are we going to take this upstairs with the furniture already in it?"

Eddie's jaw drops and he hangs his head in his hands, groaning so loudly that Steve is happy their neighbours are just used to the Eddie-generated noise by now. Nancy bursts out laughing.

When she calms down enough to form words, she leans forward and gives Eddie a condescending pat on the shoulder.

"See you in the morning, Santa’s Little Helper."

She hops out of the garage, giggling and disappears into the night before Eddie can give an expletive-laden response.

He jumps up, boots stomping on the concrete floor.

"Shit," he says, rubbing his butt and grumbling. "Better help me, He-Man. This freaking dollhouse has stolen my youth! I need the help of your big, strong arms."

He makes grabby hands for Steve who quickly stubs out the joint in an overfilled ashtray. He kisses Eddie on the forehead.

"Operation Dollhouse enters its final stage."

"Praise Jesus!" Eddie mocks, adding a whining, "I wanna go to bed."

They make quick work of removing the furniture Eddie had already placed in the dollhouse, Eddie walking ahead as the chief door-opener and toddler scout, while Steve hoists the thing (surprisingly heavy) upstairs, hoping this was close to the last thing he would have to do this Christmas that will inevitably give him back problems in a week. He sets it down right in the middle of the living room and places a dining chair in the hallway so he can keep watch if Joanie walks out of her room. Meanwhile, Eddie fulfils his one last elvish task, perched on a cushion in the living room as he works on the furniture.

Steve's heart skips a beat as a shadow moves near Joanie's ajar bedroom door, but it's only his cat, Meatloaf. He watches as the little brown cat, with a slight wobble in his step, moves down the hallway and into their bedroom, a sign that Joanie is, in fact, asleep. Despite being a shy cat (and being the unfortunate target of some household cat bullying) Meatloaf was protective of Joanie, just quietly observing her and hurrying away to hide when he decided she was okay.

Eddie takes his time with the furniture, presumably relieved he’s on the home stretch. Once he’s done, they drape a crochet blanket over it for good measure, still uneasy at the possibility of Joanie snooping around if she awakens. They do a speed-run of their typical night routine, Eddie grumpily protesting Steve's last-minute lingering in the kitchen even though there really wasn't any more he could do in preparation for Christmas Day.

It feels like mere minutes have passed when Steve awakens to the feeling of someone slapping his shoulder. He blinks awake, realising it’s still dark out. All he can hear is a murmuring sound. He looks over to see the shape of Eddie, the likely source of muffled noise, turned away from him and waving his hand in the air. He reaches over to his nightstand for his hearing aid and jolts with a gasp at the sight of Joanie standing at his bedside, bright-eyed like it wasn’t the middle of the night. He can see her head moving about, likely talking. He fumbles for his hearing aid and places it in his left ear.

"You couldn’t hear me!" she complains with the innocent impatience of a toddler.

"M’sorry, Joanie, you have to wait for me to put my ears in," he says, sitting up and yawning. 

"Is Pa here yet?" she asks, clasping her hands together expectantly.

He can now hear Eddie groaning and grumbling, "Go to sleep, Joanie."

Steve looks at the clock radio on his nightstand. 2:17 am. He rolls his eyes, just knowing that bargaining isn’t going to work, especially considering Joanie's cat, Blondie, has just scuttled into the room and is circling her little legs.

"No, baby. He'll be here at breakfast," he says, relenting and leaning over to pick her up.

"Which is how long?" she beams, wide, curious eyes glinting with mischief.

"Many hours yet," he rationalises, knowing Wayne will arrive fairly early but not wanting to say so and adds "Plenty of time to get some sleep."

He settles her in between them and Blondie promptly follows, jumping on the foot of the bed and kneading at the covers right at Steve’s feet.

"Now the cats are here!" Eddie whines, rolling onto his back. He changes his tune when he spots Joanie staring at him adoringly, "Joanie Bologna!"

"Hi," she beams, all teeth.

Eddie quirks an eyebrow, "Are you going to go back to sleep?"

"Promise!"

She pulls the covers up to her neck and kicks around a ridiculous amount before squeezing her eyes shut.

"I’m sleeping!" she announces.

Steve settles back down, "Well I need to sleep, I have a lot of cooking to do."

"Yes, Martha Stewart needs his beauty sleep," Eddie agrees, a grin detectable in his voice.

Steve nods off, now feeling like hours have passed when he stirs at the feeling of Joanie kicking around and grumbling.

"Can I go back to bed?" she stage-whispers.

"Who’s taking you?" Eddie grumbles, turning on his back with a quick "ouch" as Joanie kicks him in the process of mobilising her legs like they are helicopter blades to get the covers off.

"Both," she orders sleepily, managing to boss them about with her eyes half-closed.

They look at each other and Eddie rolls his eyes.

"A miracle," he stage-whispers as he picks her up.

Steve slips out of bed as they both muster up a shred of energy with the silent promise that this is it. The movement startles Blondie, who promptly leaps off the bed, narrowly missing being tangled in Steve’s feet and runs into the hall.

"Night, Joanie bear," Steve coos, kissing her on the cheek when they get Joanie into her own bed.

"Mhmm," she hums with a disgruntled frown like they have the gall to be disturbing her sleep.

She turns over and hugs her favourite spider plushie (named Gregory, lord knows how she comes up with names). Blondie jumps up at the foot of her bed and settles in too.

As they move into the hall, Steve catches a glimpse of the Christmas tree, twinkling just enough from the streetlights outside that he can see it in the fuzzy darkness. And there it is. That inevitable thump Steve has gotten in his chest every Christmas since 1986, the last he had spent with his parents. Actually, it was the last time he had spent any significant time with them, even if it was just a miserable Christmas dinner in silence. For all Joanie knew, Claudia Henderson was Steve's mother. And he liked it that way.

He sniffles as his mind drifts to the last phone call he'd had with his father, eight years ago when he and Eddie first moved to Chicago.

Something drops to the floor and they both jump. 

"Shit!" Steve curses, covering a blubbering gasp as he reflexively shields Eddie with his arm and backs him up against the wall. They immediately look towards Joanie's room but she doesn't seem to stir. He squints in the darkness, unable to make out the moving thing on the hall stand.

"Oh it's just Gandalf," Eddie laughs, picking up the greyish form that must be his cat, aka, the most menacing terror of the bunch. "Go find Ozzy to fight with, you little hell demon."

He sets him down in the direction of the living room and promptly snakes his arms around Steve's middle to lead him.

"Okay, back to bed, mister. Don't want you stumbling around in the dark by yourself without your glasses," he adds, kissing the nape of his neck.

"Where’s Peanut?" is all Steve can think to say, tears prickling up.

Eddie kisses into his hair as he whispers, "Probably asleep in the bath."

Steve grips his arms tight and Eddie hugs him back, probably sensing how tense he is as they awkwardly waddle as one back to bed. He even throws back the covers, helping him in before climbing over to his own side.

"What's wrong?" Eddie asks when he settles back under the covers, eyebrows furrowing as his eyes glisten with worry.

Steve settles in, curling an arm around him and nuzzling into his neck, shielding himself as tears fall as he tries desperately to blink them away. Eddie's hand finds its way to his hair as he begins the soothing motion of combing his fingers through it.

"Just thinking about my folks," he mumbles, not moving from the safety of the crevice between their pillows and Eddie's neck. They hug each other tighter as Eddie gives the faintest, "oh" like he always did when Steve got like this.

"Steve," Eddie says, voice shaky. "You've got Joanie and me… And the silly cats."

"Where's Meatloaf?" he asks, voice cracking from the lump in his throat. He sniffles and shakes his head at the sheer silliness of prioritising locating the damn cats.

Eddie lolls his head to the side, speaking directly into Steve's ear, "If I can detach myself for a moment, I'll look under the bed."

He reluctantly nods and Eddie swiftly moves away to hang over the bed edge.

"Loafy," he coos and makes kissing noises.

"Here he is," Eddie smiles weakly, presenting the little furball. Meatloaf meows excitedly at the sight of Steve and quickly curls up, tucked in right under the arm he slings back over Eddie.

"Listen to me, sweetie," Eddie whispers, his hand combing through his hair with more purpose now. "Joanie is asleep and we'll wake up fresh as daisies in the morning. Wayne will get here for breakfast. Joanie will absolutely adore her dollhouse and then they'll go out in the snow while you get started on the food. Nance and Rob will be here and soon after so will Max, Lucas and Henderson. It will be a great day like it always is with our family. All of us together... Plus, I’ve got an extra-special present for you this year."

Sensing a teasing smile in his voice, Steve can’t help but laugh, "You say that every year."

"Well, yes. Of course, there’s your super-naughty present but I have something else too," Eddie says, not relenting on the teasing.

"Love you Eds," he says, shifting ever-so-slightly to wipe at his nose with his sweater sleeve.

"I love you, Steve," he replies, kissing his cheek as he begins to pry the hearing aid out of his ear. "Get some sleep, muffin."

[music-drinks]

Elton John: Pink Gin 75!!!

Aretha Franklin: Honey whiskey, with a hint of R-E-S-P-E-C-T.

Joanie Mitchell: A nice floral old fashioned for when someone is turning your paradise into a parking lot.

Simon and Garfunkel: Chamomile and Lavender tea.

Miley Cyrus: Hanna montanna would be that blue raspberry drink you get from friendly’s, while Miley Cyrus now would be a Scarlett ohara.

Fleetwood Mac: Tequila Sunrise after having one of those… Dreams!!!!

Dolly Parton: A fun sangria, the life of the party!

Adele: Scotch.

Rhianna: Chardonnay.

Michael Jackson: HEEHEE!

Beyonce: A Marguerita with a halo of salt.

Lady Gaga: A manhattan, no explanation needed.

Madonna: Champaign for the material girl.

Blondie: A blonde beer.

The pretenders: A mocktail drink because it is… pretending!!!!

The Talking heads: The grass hopper just seems weird enough for David Byrne to drink. PERFECT!!!!

Rush: A cherry vodka for when Tom Sawyer is giving you a hard time.

BB King: Sasperilla, that’s all I can think of.

Johnny Cash: A classic Whiskey sour.

Pat benetar: A cold beer.

Brittany Spears: Sex on the Beach.

Justin Timberlake: Something non-alcoholic.

B-52s: A B52 you can get right from the loveshack (it doesn't exist).

Beach Boys: Orange Juice, good for surfing and contemplating your life.

Nsync: Baby bye bye buy my tub Mimosa, it’s really good.

The Jonas Brothers: A cup of iced coffee for when you’re burning up.

Panic at the Disco: Crystal Pepsi???? Get it? Because they don't exist anymore????

Fall out Boy: Blood and sand.

My Chemical Romance: Goat’s blood.

Lemon Demon: A Sierra Mist or any lemon and or lime flavored soda for hunting the 8th wonder or ancient aliens or any weird stuff.

Duster: Moscow Mule when you are alone in the Midwest and sad.

Johnnie Guilbert: A charcoal bubble tea, dark and edgy mixed with soft boy energy.

[westofwonder]

flash finale finally watching

Of course, Allegra get’s the first line in this last episode.

And then Cecile, way to stay consistent post season six Flash.

Teddy Sears, oh man, you had a career before this show.

Godspeed I forgot you were a guy.

Zoom’s suit looks better.

Comparing Season one and twos’ plots is kinda sad.

Forgetting Savitar is Barry will be a thing I do this entire episode.

Eddie’s costume should have a stupid mask.

Barry and Iris together really shows how much this show has aged them and their actors. Humbling.

“I’m not Eddie Thawne anymore, I’M BLUE BLUE!”

I miss Sue.

The lightning stuff looks so bad.

Hell, yeah, blow up those cars!

I think one of the most egregious scenes this show ever did was have The Flash, Elongated Man, Killer Frost, and Vibe all lined up together to fight the Thinker. It really shows the bloat. This scene of Team Flash vs Evil Speedsters might’ve just topped it.

I thought Savitar was blue.

Cecile fighting Godspeed is exactly what it is. It’s dumb.

That’s how easily Savitar got taken down?

This is going longer than the Savitar fight. It’s dumb.

“Sorry, Chester, I’m here for Cisco, but Carlos wasn’t available and they didn’t feel like rewriting the script.”

Tom, what are you doing with your hands?

I didn’t think Zoom had lightning power.

Zoom got taken down too easily.

Oh, right, Nash.

Have to wonder about the version where Chester is killed off.

Wally and Chester could’ve been great friends.

Jay kinda shows up out of nowhere.

Red skies.

“He’ll overload himself like Thawne!” Just like last season! Essentially. :/

Is Chillblaine just leftover Ralph stuff?

Oh, Grant actually wants to act today.

SO that easy to stop him, huh? Actually that’s kinda nice.

BABY TIME!

I think my recording just gave up. The CW, amiright?

Out of all the Flash runs to borrow stuff from, the latter Williamson run? Legion of Zoom reference - fr?!

How do you have data for that statistic, Chillblaine?

Yay! Dwayne McDuffie reference.

Joe’s here, oh good, some heart.

Thinker reference. And none for Cicada, bye! The worst villain IMHO, the worst.

I like this Harrison Wells.

So she was Gaea. Essentially.

BABY NORA!

Wow, Candice is a phenom in this scene!

Joe’s a Granddad!

Bye, Khione! Still, what an odd choice for a final season.

I knew Caitlin was coming back - that got spoiled. Nice, I guess.

I wasn’t not rooting for that I guess.

Distracted by Barry’s not-parents chatting in the background. This scene was done for this cast.

Bart can’t be here - he’s singing on Broadway.

Joanie got erased in Crisis I guess.

This proposal is so dumb. Cecile, you need friends your own age.

The Runaway Dinosaur. :’)

I do like the idea of Barry talking to Nora and it’s the initial voiceovers from season one.

Montage time!

Barry being the lightning for other speedsters is nice.

Avery! Max! Jess! Gee, I wonder if there were ever any plans for you?

Okay, got me a little in the end.

So, when this show was about the Flash it was great. When it’s about all the superfluous Team Flash characters it’s mostly DOA.

I’ll miss it at times, but I don’t I’ll seek it out.

This show did get me interested in the Flash and the surrounding characters in a way Arrow didn’t and certainly Legends of Tomorrow didn’t.

When this show was good - it was good!

Thanks, Flash.

[pretty-emo-dad]

Wait have I ever actually talked about ALL my sexuality, pronoun, and gender hcs? Prolly not here we go!!!

Starting off w my blorbo Mike Wheelie:

He/She with no preference, genderqueer as FUCK!!! I usually hc her as gay but sometimes i can also see him as bi

Eleven Hopper my bbg:

She/her, def see her being a trans lesbian!! I can also accept her as cis but like,,, trans girl Jane hopper u will always be famous. Could def analyze how she is 100% lesbian tho

Lucas Sinclair my son, light of my life, air to me lungs:

They/he, having a gender moment at all times but KNOWS they’re bisexual. First crush was mike and then max (he has a type) so they kinda always knew yk? Anyways the first to come out, shocked everyone tbh

Speaking of Sinclairs, my fave 11 yr old Erica!!!:

Future stem lesbian, doesn’t care enough about pronouns, didn’t come out she just came home and was like “oh btw I’m going to prom & Tina is my date ‘Kay bye”

MadMax baybee!!:

Any pronouns bc she doesn’t care, but she’s cis. Bi and polyam, also arospec but doesn’t rlly know what exact part she is!

Dusty bunnnnn!!!!:

They/she/he (in order of preference), non-binary but unlabeled sexuality

Cant talk about dusty bun without taking about SUZIE (my gf #real):

She/he (in order of preference), big ol lesbian, complex relationship w religion

Will the wise !!:

He/him and gay (canon, my Will hcs are very boring I’m sorry)

OKAY OLDERTEENS

Robin “The Pariah” Buckley:

She/they/he (in order of preference), lesbian (canon)

Joan “The Loner” Byers:

She/they, transfem bisexual, I think she would pick the name Joan bc it has “I listen to the smiths” energy (nance gave her the nickname Joanie now it’s the only thing argyle calls her)

Stevie ‘The Hair’ Harrington:

She/her, bisexual, cried the first time Dustin called her mom but didn’t know why, Nancy gave her big gender envy

Elvira ‘The Freak’ Munson!!!:

She/it, pansexual transgirl , yes she named herself after Elvira: mistress of the dark shut up (another name concept I have for her is Domino based off the song by kiss), helped mike out w his gender struggles

Nancy ‘The Slut’ Wheeler:

She/any, lesbian with two gfs (Joanie and Robbie), took her a very long time to come to terms w not liking men but embraces it now

Argyle ‘The Stoner’:

They/he, pansexual! Dating Eden and Joanie and very attentive puppy bf (joan called them ‘argie’ and then bit their cheek while high, has no recollection of this. Eden and argyle make fun of her for it)

Eden ‘The Goth’ Bingham:

They/he in a girl way, pansexual like their bf!! (Is not dating Joan but they’re besties)

[jeontaehui]

TAEHEE IN MARK, TEN, & DOYOUNG’S 090421 INSTAGRAM LIVE [TRANSCRIPT]

TN: yo mark, is— is taehee with you?

MK: oh she’s not here right now.

TN: but i thought you guys were like, roommates.

MK: i think she’s in the studio?— i don’t know. i was calling her before i called you but she wasn’t picking up.

TN: (teasing) so what... am i like, your second priority? (chuckles)

MK: oh what— dude, that’s not what i meant!

DY: look at this, it’s taehee and mark. (he shows a picture of them doing peace signs while taehee was winking)

TN: oh cute!

MK: yooo... we were like what? 15?

TN: you guys look cute together.

MK: what?! (laughs)

TN: (nervously chuckling) no, i meant— (laughs) i meant like you guys look cute and were always together.

MK: (still laughing)

TN: i don’t know why my brain did a shortcut but you guys were always together.

TN: like whenever i’d see mark, taehee’s somewhere there too. “have you seen taehee? oh never mind, mark is here.”

DY: right!

TN: you guys are very.... like best friends.

MK: yeah, from the very start. ever since day one.

DY: (laughing) YOU GUYS, LOOK AT THIS. (he shows another predebut picture — 15 year-old taehee with pigtails, her brows furrowed as she side-eyed someone with her lips into an angry pout) (mark and ten laugh)

MK: she’s so cute!

TN: who made her mad? hyung, why was taehee like that?

DY: i think this was when taeyong hyung suggested to tie her hair like that and everyone started calling her ‘boo’ from that movie.

MK: monsters inc.

DY: that one. so she started acting like a toddler as a joke. (chuckles)

TN: i remember when like, they told us taehee would be debuting with us.

MK: yeah?

TN: i remember in my mind, i was like, “woah— wait, what?”

MK: but it was like good though, like—

TN: yeah, it was like a good surprise.

DY: taehee was supposed to debut in a girl group, right? wah... i still remember the first time we all practiced together.

TN: i remember how cool she looked when she danced, but like in my eyes, she’s still a baby, you know? (mark and doyoung laugh)

TN: like (he puts on a fierce expression) she looks cool with her facial expressions and stuff but like, she’s still a cute baby.

MK: (teasing) ohhh~ ten.

TN: (monotonously) don’t tell her i said that.

MK: but dude, you didn’t like, change at all.

TN: are you saying i looked old before—

MK: no! no, no like, you look young.

TN: (grinning) but you and taehee— you guys were like babies.

MK: (chuckles)

TN: but now you’re sexy.

MK: .....excuse me? excuse me, what?

DY: oh!

MK: ten, look who’s here!

TH: are you guys facetiming? what’s going on?

DY: instagram live.

MK: we’re doing an instagram live. (he turns the phone to her)

TH: oh wow! hello! (she waves her hand)

TN: hi taehee!

MK: were you in the studio?

TH: ...no (she shakes her head, before gesturing to doyoung) i was in their dorm.

MK: oh i thought you were in the studio!

TH: yeah i showered there. (mark, doyoung, and ten laugh at her nonchalance)

TH: oh dude, wait no. (giggles) i meant i showered in their dorm.

TH: i’m gonna go back down though. haechan’s inviting me to play with jeno.

TN: taehee, how old are you again? like haechan?

TH: (she gets closer to the phone) i’m twenty-one! (doyoung and mark laugh)

TN: OHH HAHAHAHA (laughter dies down into soft chuckles) i thought you were their age.

MK: five more days and she will be. (he says this the same time as taehee’s, “five more days and i will be.”)

TH: i’m gonna go now.

DY: haechan’s waiting for you? (mark looks at taehee while she nods)

MK: okay, well— everyone.. so joanie’s gonna go now.

TN: johnny? (mark and doyoung laugh for the nth time that night)

TH: my name is joan!

TN: ohh like your english name? (giggles)

TH: yeah, but mark calls me joanie.

TN: okay, bye bye joanie. (he waves his hand)

TH: bye, chittaphon! (the rest of the boys laugh at her adorable salute, waiting until she leaves and shuts the door before continuing with the live)

[haltandcatchfiretothemax]

FEMSLASH FEBRUARY 2021 #20: In which Cameron and Donna talk over a movie

[CN: spoilers for Gia (1998); adult women talking about sex and their sex lives]

.

.

.

Since it was well-known amongst their friends just how easy it was to get Donna to invite people over, Risa unashamedly telephoned her, on a Sunday afternoon, to ask her to host a watch party for the premiere of Gia. Donna, taking the call in the kitchen, agreed immediately, and wasted no time in contacting Dr. Katie Herman, and then when Haley heard about the party, she invited herself and Vanessa. They gathered at 7pm on January 31 of 1998 in Donna’s media room.

Cameron, of course, had been the very first invite, though she had declined. “Uh, as uplifting as watching a movie that inevitably ends with a tragic death due to AIDS complications with the girls sounds, I have plans. Bos and I are going out.”

“Oh,” Donna had pouted. “Well, maybe we can watch it another time, then! Just the two of us?” When Cameron looked up from the copy of Scientific American she’d been skimming through to side-eyed her from across the kitchen island, mug of coffee in hand, Donna wheedled, “Oh come on! It’s about a hot gay woman! Played by a hot, potentially gay woman!” When Cameron gave her another look, Donna crossed her arms over her chest and said, “According to Risa, there are rumors. Something involving an on-set romance during the making of a movie called Foxfire.”

Cameron looked back down at her magazine. “It is so weird to me that they let a gay woman be a hugely successful supermodel. Or not weird, just, I don’t know.” Irritated, she flipped a page, and then added, “I don’t really wanna be interested in something just because it’s about someone gay. But also, like, sure I am? It’s, stupid.” 

With a forlorn little shrug, Donna said, “You’re right, it’s stupid. Might as well use it as an excuse to have your friends over and have fun with it then, right?”

“Again, I feel like ‘fun’ isn’t the word I’d use for watching a tragic story of addiction and terminal illness, but, sure,” Cameron said.

Despite her misgivings, Cameron happily helped Donna get the house ready that day, making sure that the spare rooms and trailer were all habitable for potential overnight guests, as she always did before they had company. When Bos came to pick her up at 4, he came in for a while, and had some coffee with Donna, and then when they were ready to be on their way, Cameron kissed Donna and wished her a nice time with their friends and their sad movie. 

Cameron and Bos went to the local shopping mall for a stroll and some browsing at a large chain retailer of books, where neither of them found anything, and then to their favorite diner, where they sat for a long time after they had their burgers and fries and slices of chocolate peanut butter pie, talking about Bos’s most recent fishing trip, and how things were at Phoenix, and how Haley and Joanie and Bos’s grandson and step-grandchildren were doing. 

Cameron returned around 8:30, and went straight to the media room to see how the watch party was going. From the sound of it, it was in full swing, Cameron could hear cheering and shouting from the hallway. She went into the room, about to say, ‘Hey, guys,’ only to be distracted by the television screen, on which Angelina Jolie had just walked out into the hallway, wearing nothing but a bemused expression. There was a full length shot from behind of her entire, naked body, and then a waist up shot of her from the front, as she tried to talk to another character. Utterly beguiled by Angelina Jolie’s extremely bare, extremely full breasts, Cameron audibly said, “…whoa.”

Everyone laughed (and Vanessa deadpanned, “I mean, we were all thinking it, right?”), which made Cameron blush slightly. 

“Hey! You’re back!” Donna said, smiling brightly. “Wanna join us?” 

Face still pink, Cameron said, “No, no I’m good, thanks! I think I’m just gonna go get my pajamas on!” They laughed more, and Cameron said, “I’ll see you all later, after the movie? Okay cool bye!” She hurried up to the bedroom, where Licorice the cat was hiding from the unexpected invasion of unfamiliar humans. 

Three and a half hours later, after the movie had ended, and they’d all discussed their reactions, questions, and critiques of it over hot chocolate, and Cameron and Donna had thanked everyone and shown them out, Donna went up to the bedroom (Licorice was still there, napping on their bed), but Cameron wasn’t there. She brushed her teeth, washed her face, changed into her pajamas, and then went back down to the kitchen, and then to the media room, where she found Cameron, box of Good’n’Plentys in hand, watching the midnight re-airing of the movie. 

“Couldn’t resist after all, then?” Donna said. 

Cameron literally jumped, sending candy flying. “Jesus, Donna!” 

“Want some company?” Donna offered.

“If you really wanna watch it again, I guess, sure,” Cameron said, trying to collect all of the licorice bits that had fallen into her lap. Donna sat down, getting as close to Cameron as she comfortably could, and crossed her legs underneath her. Aggrieved, Cameron complained, “The stuff with the parents? Depressing.”

“Yeah,” Donna agreed. “In some ways she kinda reminds me of someone, though? I don’t know. Tall and outrageously beautiful yet weird and intense, streetwise yet naive, in love with a lovely if seemingly square woman....”

Cameron smiled bashfully. “If only I’d liked looking pretty, and being seen! I too could be a bisexual supermodel!” She shook some more candy into her mouth. Thickly, she said, “I can’t believe I ever did beauty pageants. I’m so glad I stopped, Christ.”

They sat quietly, Cameron becoming even quieter as Gia and makeup artist Linda met, participated in a what turned into a nude photo shoot together, and proceeded to have sex back at Gia’s apartment. When the movie came back to the scene where Angelina Jolie went out into the hallway naked, Cameron said, “Not to sound cliche or whatever, but, I feel like I didn’t fully get the big deal people make about sex until you. I mean, not like I didn’t enjoy it, just, even when I did really enjoy it, it would feel like something was off? Or like, it didn’t matter what I did or how I did it, because it would feel like, something about me was fundamentally off. Or wrong. I think that’s why it took me so long to break up with J0e,” she admitted. “I never felt like there was something wrong about how I was with him.”

“Aw,” Donna said. She took Cameron’s free hand in her own, looked up adoringly at Cameron, and said, “…that’s gay.”

Cameron snorted, and then said, “I asked for that, huh?”

Donna let go of Cameron’s hand so she could put her arm around Cameron’s shoulders. “Seriously though. I think we have skewed ideas about sex. Unrealistic expectations about how easy or how naturally it will come to us. We think we’re gonna have the best and wildest sex of our lives in our 20s, but it doesn’t work like that? Figuring out what you really like, and what you need to feel fully comfortable, and then finding partners who you’re really compatible with, that takes time, a lot of time, and a lot of effort, too! Every woman I’ve ever talked to about it was well into her 30s when she figured it out.”

“So it’s not just me, then?” Cameron said.

“No, it is definitely not just you,” Donna said.

Quietly, Cameron said, “Do you ever kind of feel like sex is maybe just, like, a little overrated? I really, really like you and all, but….”

Kissing the top of Cameron’s head, Donna said, “Not lately, no! But I know what you’re saying. It’s great but it’s also not worth the indignities a lot of us tolerate for it. People act like it’s a necessity, and it’s not! It’s a luxury! That some people aren’t even that into! And there’s nothing weird about that!”

“It’s a little strange to hear you say that after a year of sleeping with you and seeing first-hand just how much of a freak you are, but I appreciate it nonetheless,” Cameron said. 

“Oh, honey,” Donna arched an eyebrow. “We’re just getting started.” Cameron looked over at her and laughed nervously, and then Donna said, “There’s always gonna be more to us than that, though. Because we started out as more than that, and I’m happy about that. I’m glad that we were partners before we became, you know. Partners.”

Sighing contentedly, Cameron said, “So am I, Boss.”

[mmecolbert]

I'm glad the army makes you feel like a man, cause I'm sick of trying to do it.

Joan Harris Holloway

[fuckstruckswan]

Guess i wont be watching ouat anymore

[emmaspirate]

update: I've watched 14.5 hours of the flash in 2 days I blame you @colinodonoghues

[littleoases]

It’s been awhile since HNITS has been out and I can’t help but to think how Hannah and Baker would be living together! Or possibly engaged! Could we get a one-shot about where they would be in their lives all this time later?

Hannah is determined to get a run in after work, even if it means she’ll be cutting it close for their Bachelor in Paradise viewing party. It’s the finale tonight, which means at least one of the couples will get engaged, but Hannah only cares about one pairing: the two women. She and Baker have been glued to the TV screen for weeks, ever since Demi’s girlfriend, Kristian, joined her in Paradise. They’ve never seen two women fall in love on this show before. They’ve hardly seen two women fall in love in real life.

As she runs up and down the streets of their quaint, laidback neighborhood, Hannah can’t help thinking about how a proposal between two women on the show would work. She’s been thinking a lot about proposals between women lately. Not for any particular reason or anything.

“Feel better?” Baker asks when Hannah hustles through their apartment door. She’s standing at the kitchen counter, arranging a cheese plate, her hair thrown up in a messy topknot. And maybe it’s because Hannah’s been thinking about rings and proposals and weddings, but she can’t help adoring Baker in that moment. They’ve lived together for three years now, but coming home to each other will never get old.

Hannah draws close to her and steals a swig from her water glass. She feels a playful energy coming over her, the one she often gets when Baker’s trying to concentrate on something and Hannah wants to distract her. Just to be a skootch, she nudges the cheese plate away from Baker’s reach.

“Oh no, here we go,” Baker says, rolling her eyes. “Are you overflowing with endorphins again? Gonna flirt with me like a middle school boy?”

“I like flirting with you,” Hannah says, grinning.

“You like messing with me.”

“Because you’re cute when you’re distracted.”

“Mhm.” Baker pulls Hannah towards her, but then she pauses and wrinkles her nose. “Honey, you need a shower, like, yesterday.”  

Hannah leans into her. “Aww, that’s so sweet of you to say.” She pulls a squirming Baker even closer. “Wanna give me a kiss? Maybe here, on my neck? Peak sweatiness?”  

“You’re gross,” Baker says, but she’s laughing. She plants a quick kiss on Hannah’s mouth. “Eugh, I can taste it. Get in the shower. Everyone will be here in 20 minutes.”

She swats Hannah on the ass, hurrying her along. Hannah nicks a piece of cheese straight from the center of the the plate, just to mess with her one more time, but she does as she’s told and heads for the bathroom.

Their shower smells like lavender—Baker’s favorite bubble bath scent—and for a moment Hannah wishes they weren’t hosting friends tonight so she and Baker could take a long, relaxing soak in the garden tub. It’s become one of their favorite things to do since they moved into this upgraded apartment. Some nights, after they’ve cleaned up dinner, they’ll sink into a hot bubble bath and talk about the next vacation they want to take. Baker will float ideas about skiing and safaris and architecture tours, and Hannah will hold her around the middle, pressing their naked skin together, nuzzling her nose into the baby hairs at the back of Baker’s neck.

Hannah’s heart beats faster just thinking about it.

“Han!” Baker calls from the kitchen, as if she knows Hannah’s mind is starting to wander.

“Yeah?!” Hannah shouts back.

Baker yells something else, but it’s muffled and unclear.

“I can’t hear you!” Hannah laughs under her breath because no matter how many times they go through this back-and-forth with one of them in the shower and one of them shouting from the kitchen, they never seem to learn.

The shower curtain rips back, and Hannah opens her eyes to find Baker hovering there with a spoonful of icing.

“Try this,” Baker orders, her face alight like it always is when she’s happy with a new recipe. Her eyes flit over Hannah’s naked body, but she focuses on the icing again. Hannah can tell she’s in full-on hostess mode.

“Mm,” Hannah says, licking the frosting off the spoon. “You made that?”

“For the cupcakes. I’m icing them now. I’m gonna draw engagement rings on top.”

Hannah laughs. “Brilliant, babe.”

Baker leans against the wall. Her attention is fully on Hannah now, her eyes roaming over Hannah’s skin. “You have the cutest little body,” she says, as if she hasn’t seen it a million times before.

“I know, right?”

Baker gives her another trademark eye roll. “Come here, asshole.”

She kisses Hannah in a gentle, routine way, and Hannah’s can’t help but flick water at her until Baker starts to laugh into her mouth.

It’s just a few friends who come over. Gretchen, the vet tech from Baker’s office; Connie, the teacher down the hall from Hannah; and Britta and Devin from their kickball league. It’s the same group of people every time, and they all know whose favorite contestants are whose, and it’s an accepted fact that Devin will bring a pack of beer even though Baker tells her not to worry about it.

The first time they hosted a viewing party, Baker went wild with the cleaning. She dusted every nook of their bookshelf, wiped down the inside of the microwave, even added the fancy decorative pillows to their bed despite Hannah’s protests that no one would see their bedroom anyway. Now that they’ve had the gang over too many times to count, they can get away with merely folding the blankets on the couch and scooping up Charlie’s chew toys.

Hannah’s phone rings when she’s in the middle of lighting the scented candles. She knows it’s her sister even before she answers the FaceTime call.

“What, weirdo?”

Joanie takes a theatrical sip of her wine. She’s wearing the fluffy scarlet bathrobe her latest boyfriend bought for her birthday. “Make the show start. I’m dying.”

“You look dumb in that bathrobe.”

“You’re just jealous. Give the phone to Baker. I like her better.”

“No. Who are you watching with tonight?”

“Gina,” Joanie says, referring to her roommate. “But she went out for more wine. Are y’all excited for your girls, or what?”

“So excited!” Baker shouts from the kitchen.”

“Don’t jinx it,” Hannah says. “We’re not positive they’re getting engaged.”

“Oh, please,” Joanie says flatly. “They’re so in love they make you two look like straight girls.”

“That’s offensive,” Baker says, now sorting apricots onto the cheese plate. Hannah catches her eye and Baker gives her that secret look she loves.

“We gotta go, Joanie. I have to help Baker put the food out.”

“Yeah, right. More like eat it while Baker does the actual work.”

“Accurate,” Baker says without looking up.

“Whatever. We’ll call you after the show.”

“Call me at commercial,” Joanie orders. “We gotta discuss their rings. I’ll let you know which ones Baker would be into.”

“Very funny,” Hannah says, even though she always pays attention when Baker gives her opinion on other people’s engagement rings. Again, not for any particular reason. “Bye.”

“Bye.”

Hannah joins Baker at the counter, steals an apricot off the plate. “Baby,” she says thoughtfully, chewing for a moment. “Do you really think they’ll get engaged tonight?”

“Why not?” Baker says. “The show has been treating them just like the straight couples.”

“But it’s like…too good to be true.”

“My question is: Will they both propose? Or just Demi?”

Hannah nicks another apricot off the plate. She gives Baker a bite of it and they stare at each other for a moment, considering.

“Maybe they’ll both do it?” Hannah says.

“I hope so. That would be cool.”

“Yeah?”

“Yeah.”

“So does that mean you want both of us to propose, when the time comes?”

“Hmmm,” Baker says, exaggerating her thinking face as if she’s never considered this question before, though Hannah would bet all her money that she definitely has. “Well. I would like to propose to you, for sure. If you want to propose back, go for it.”

Hannah snorts. “‘Propose back’?”

“What else do you wanna call it, punk?” She pulls Hannah into her, her arms snug around Hannah’s waist. “I’m getting down on one knee, either way. You can reciprocate if you want to.”

“Recipro-gay-te.”

“Yes,” Baker says, pulling her even tighter. “That.”

“Just marry me now.”

“Right when the show’s about to start?”

“Yeah.”

“Let’s wait ’til commercial.”

“Okay.”

Baker kisses her, and that’s when the doorbell rings.

Hannah’s not sure whether it’s the beer or the general giddiness she’s had all evening, but when the moment comes for Demi to propose to Kristian, she actually tears up.

She and Baker are on the smaller couch, fingers intertwined, knees bumping together. Their friends have gone quiet, knowing how big this moment is for them, except for Devin, who starts whooping from her spot on the floor.

When Demi drops to one knee in front of Kristian, Hannah can’t help glancing at Baker.

Her eyes are shining; her mouth is the slightest bit open. She looks like a kid stepping into Disney World for the first time. Hannah couldn’t love her any more if she tried.

By the time Kristian has said “Yes,” Baker is looking back at Hannah. She notices the wetness in Hannah’s eyes and makes her Oh, honey face, laying a hand along Hannah’s cheek.

“It’s really real?” Hannah asks.

Baker looks at the TV, then back to her again. “It’s real, Han.”

And Hannah knows she’s being silly, because it’s not like they know these two women on this manufactured reality show, but she can’t help the expansive feeling in her chest, the one that hints at what’s to come for her own happy ending.

After their friends have left and Joanie’s manic FaceTime call has ended, it’s just the two of them and Charlie again, snuggled up on the couch together.

“Can we take a bath?” Hannah asks.

Baker kisses the spot below her ear. “Yes.”

They sink into the hot lavender water, but tonight they don’t talk about vacations. They talk about honeymoons.

***

***

***

Additional HNITS one-shots here.

If you enjoyed reading this, I hope you’ll do me a solid and add my upcoming release, Late to the Party, to your Goodreads shelf! (You can also pre-order it here.) 

[musicrunsthroughmysoul]

Tagged

I was tagged by @jjmichie - thank you! It’s nice to get to know new (to me!) bloggers, especially since I haven’t been here in forever so I haven’t had the opportunity to get to know anybody new.

Nickname: n/a although some of my best friends call me Lovely. (My name, Lily, is already too short to make into a nickname!) Although some random people IRL will also call me Lillian because it’s literally not my name. LOL

Zodiac: Taurus

Height: 5'0”

Last thing i googled:  synonyms for “approve” (I was writin’ a Twitter thread/music-related rant late last night)

favorite bands: Tom Petty and the Heartbreakers, Fleetwood Mac, Heart, Journey, The Beatles, Fanny, CCR, Queen, The Police, U2, The Pointer Sisters, Romeo Void, Concrete Blonde, L7, Pearl Jam, Sleater-Kinney, Thunderpussy, The Black Tones, Big Joanie, Fatty Cakes and the Puff Pastries, Fea...and those are just bands/groups, strictly speaking.

last film i watched: Howl’s Moving Castle

last song i listened to: “Deliver Me” by Tom Petty and the Heartbreakers

song stuck in my head: "Se Cree Joven” by Alice Bag 

favorite color: Green  

dream job:  ...music writer.................(I’m very reluctant to say that so if you poke me about it I’ll probably cry. I’M BEING TOO HONEST I KNOOOOOOW)

wearing: My TPATH 40th anniversary tour shirt and pajama pants with the Hogwarts house crests on them.

hobbies: reading, playing Pokemon, writing, listening to music (an obvious thing), eating and drinking coffee (I’d say cooking too but I kind of hate cooking. I like it if I’m making food for other people to enjoy, but just for myself I pretty much hate it), researching music history, and to risk sounding like a gigantic fucking nerd I also just like doing research in general sometimes

instruments: Voice, as those of us in choir would always assert that it’s an instrument (or more like we would be like “Yeah, okay, sure” when our choir director would tell us “YOUR VOICE IS AN INSTRUMENT AND DON’T LET ANYONE FORGET IT”)...otherwise, I can kinda play piano by ear.

inspiration or muse: Odd question, but I’m going to specify that I think of this in terms of inspirations/muses for ‘succeeding in life and being authentic,’ because that’s what I constantly feel I need to be inspired by. So my answers, that considered, are Janis Joplin, Linda Ronstadt, Cyndi Lauper, and Alice Bag.

meaning behind your URL: To listen to music just with your ears is boring. (To love music with just your heart is cliché. IN MY HEARTFELT OPINION. LOL) Honestly, whether I like it or not sometimes, I feel music. That’s what my URL’s supposed to represent.

facts: only child of a single mother, in my early 20s, single and 92% cool with that, I was born in southern California but I’ve lived in western Washington for most of my life now (and am pretty resentful of that although now that I’ve gotten into bands from WA I feel...a little bit more mellow about it), just recently got two part-time jobs which is a huge improvement from NEVER having a job before LOL, volunteer at a DIY live music venue, actually love to dance but I don’t do it enough, still haven’t learned how to drive! I know, I’m pathetic! Bye!, was diagnosed with depression when I was 8 years old, I’m super introverted and shy but I appreciate my friends and talking to people who don’t pressure me to be social!

aesthetics: Nature, I suppose? I’ve always kind of been obsessed with the ocean (so when people from WA are like, ‘Oh gosh, the mountains are the most amazing thing I’ve ever seen!!!!’ which happens a lot I’m like HARD PASS, I’LL TAKE THE OCEAN PLEASE, THANK YOU). Also, this might sound really weird in this context but just humor me - authenticity. And one last probably unexpected thing...cute/adorable things. LOL

Now I’ll tag @astoppedclock, @drummersheartbeat, @gemvictorfromtheponyverse, @happytimetravelmilkshake But don’t feel pressured to do it if you don’t want to. ♥

[meteorit3737]

11 (or P.S.)

Three months later.

Donna drove up to the house, singing along to the song on the radio. She was absolutely happy right here and right now. And this condition had not let her go for several months. At the same time, she can not say that all the events during this time were absolutely perfect, no. There were problems in the Symphonic, there was concern for Joanie, who did not call for 4 days on her trip around the country, there were even two arguments with Cameron, which ended in a conversation, compromise and a tender reconciliation. And for all that, Donna was happy, the realization of which sometimes came to her at the most unexpected moment, like now.

Near the house, Donna saw an unfamiliar car. Who could it be? They weren't expecting anyone today, and Joanie was on the other side of the country yesterday. Donna parked, got out of the car, and went to the house to find the last person she expected standing at the door. Joe. For a moment, Donna didn't know what to make of his visit. Why is he here? Is this attempt to contact with Cam? Donna knew that Joe had been texting Haley all this time, and that she'd been sending messages from Joe to Cam and back, but it didn't go any further than that. And suddenly this visit.

Joe turned and saw her. A slight smile appeared on his face:

- Hi, Donna! I'm sorry that I didn't warn, but I was in the area for work and decided to stop by. But if I'm not on time, I can leave. Moreover, there seems to be no one at home, no one opens the door.

- No, it 's fine, - Donna said calmly. - Cam and Haley have to be home, I saw their cars. Perhaps they are playing a computer game again and don't hear anything .

Donna opened the door with her key and motioned for Joe to come in. The house was quiet. Donna and Joe went into the living room. There were two empty orange soda cans and wrappers from the chocolate bars that Haley likes on the table next to the couch. Donna wanted to go upstairs to check on Cam and Haley's rooms, but she heard the sound of dishes from the kitchen.

- Cam! - she called, but no one answered. Donna raised her eyebrows and followed the sound. In the kitchen, Cam was standing by the stove, her back to her, headphones on, stirring a pot. The mystery of silence was solved. Donna walked over to Cam and gently touched her arm. Cam turned her head and smiled brightly.

- Hi! - then she put her free hand on Donna's shoulder, leaned over quickly, and kissed her on the mouth. - You're just in time! And guess what finally started working today?

- Really? Cam, this is wonderful! - Donna was so happy that she forgot everything. She gave Cam a quick hug, caught a glimpse of Joe standing in the doorway, and stopped awkwardly. Donna reached out and removed Cam's earphones.

- Um, Cam...

Cam turned, saw Joe, and frozen. They stared at each other for a moment. The arm Cam, which still remained on Donna's shoulder, moved a little and squeezed her a little tighter. There was a sudden hiss on the stove, and Cam jumped, turned to the stove, and hurriedly moved the pot to another place. At that moment, Haley appeared behind Joe and shouted with joy:

- Hey, Joe!

Joe turned to Haley and gave her a warm smile:

- Hey, Haley! How do you feel about unexpected guests?

- Good. Cam and I made chili today, do you want to try it? 

Haley went into the kitchen and started getting plates. Donna reached for the cutlery.

- Actually, - Cam said, -  someone escaped during the final stage of cooking.

- Well, Cam, I got a call from Jessica, and I only left for a few minutes! - Haley said plaintively.

- Three songs! - Cam put her headphones and audio player on the edge of the table.

Joe sat down in a chair and looked from one to the other with an enigmatic smile. When he caught Haley's eye, she looked at him guiltily and shrugged. Cam, Donna, and Haley set the table in unison and all sat down. There was a tense silence over the table. Joe leaned back in his chair, looked at Cam, and said:

- I don't even know why I was so surprised at first. Come to think of it, it was obvious. It was always Donna, wasn't it? - He looked at Donna: - And for you, it's always been Cam. - He looked at them both: - Are you happy?

Cam and Donna both said, "Yes!", they looked at each other and smiled affectionately.

- And you? Are you happy now, Joe? - Cam asked softly.

- Yes, I'm fine, - Joe said. - I feel in my place, I have an exciting job and interesting people around me. - He picked up a spoon and tasted the chili. - Oh, it's delicious! I know that I suddenly fell on your heads, to be honest, at first I was going to do my business and leave, it was a spontaneous decision to come here, but I'm glad that it happened. I... I miss. I would like to continue to communicate with you, with all of you. Of course, Haley writes to me, but clearly not everything. - Joe winked at Haley. - And I'm happy for you, really happy.

Haley smiled:

- If everyone's doing well, let's eat!

The atmosphere was relaxed and the four of them had a quiet dinner.

***

After they said good-bye to Joe, and Haley went to her room, Cam, who was standing behind Donna, put her arm around her and sighed softly against her ear.

- You were right, - she murmured, - no thunder and lightning, it is quiet, imperceptible, and much stronger.

- What are you talking about? - Donna turned her face to Cam and raised her eyebrows.

- I was just looking at Joe and... I mean, when we broke up, we both knew it didn't work and it can't work, but it still hurt, and today I realized it doesn't hurt anymore. It hasn't hurt for a long time, actually. It was the same with Tom. But I think that... - She paused, sighed again, and went on, - do you remember our meeting on Comdex?

- Of course, - Donna tightened her grip on Cam's hands, remembering. - You were so expressive at the party. I thought I wouldn't see you for years, and I didn't expect to open the door in the morning and find you there.

- I didn't expect to spend the night with Joe, either. Meeting you has stirred up so many emotions in me. And it wasn't the first time. Working together in Mutiny with you and Tom... Joe's right, it's always been you. It just seemed so strange and improbable that I didn't understand it and stubbornly didn't notice it.

- I know, Cam, - Donna turned in the ring of hands of Cameron and hugged her. - It was the same with me. I came up with a bunch of good reasons why I was so persistent with the IPO, but I was actually a little off because I felt like I was losing you. You moved, you got married, and I just...

- Go nuts? - Cam chuckled.

- I wouldn't put it that way, but I did! - Donna giggled. - And my mark was often itchy as hell. I thought it was an allergy.

- Yeah, me too. It really annoyed me, the mark really annoyed me, - Cam admitted. - It kind of limited my choices, you know? It's like people without a mark can take responsibility for their own choices and relationships, and I'm doomed to fail because I have the only soulmate in the world, which means I won't be happy with someone else, but my mark so stupid. And I thought that if I ever met a man with such a strange name, I would avoid him as much as possible, just out of a sense of contradiction.

- You're a rebel, - Donna said, looking at her tenderly.

- But the truth is, I came to you all the time. Mutiny, San Francisco, Phoenix... At that meeting about the browser project, I tried so hard not to forget my pain, but when you spoke to me, I felt like I was ... How...

- At home, - Donna said quietly.

- Yes, - Cam said . - I was afraid how quickly it happened, and I pushed you away. But without you, even such an interesting project was not interesting to me. Gordon and Joe were mad at me about it. Tom was mad at me because of Joe. And all this resulted in a Pilgrim. Which only you finished. The circle closed.

- It's not a circle, more like a spiral. Cam, let's sit down, I'm tired of standing. - They sat down next to each other and tried to put their arms around each other, both needing good physical contact after this emotional conversation. But they couldn't get comfortable. Finally, Cam sat firmly behind Donna, placing her long legs and arms on either side of her, hugged Donna, and leaned back on the couch. Donna asked worriedly, "Is it hard for you?", received a negative response, gently leaned on Cam, put hands on top of her hands and rested head on her collarbone. She turned her head a little, admired the sharp line of Cam's jaw, and gently touched her lips to it. Cam in response to the tight squeeze of the hand.

- I'm glad you're my soulmate, - Donna whispered .

- I'm glad you're mine, - Cam breathed . - I don't feel obligated by the mark, because you and I... Well... Donna, tell, you were always better with speeches.

- Because we chose each other not because of the marks, but in spite of them. (Cam nodded approvingly.) And the marks were just confirmation. (Cam nodded again.) And you're a weirdo, but my favorite weirdo.

Cam nodded, then froze and said, "Wait, who?" Donna laughed.

- And you know what else, Cam?

- What?

- We look like bats.

Cam sat up straight, picked up the blanket from the back of the couch, draped it over her arms and back, and resumed her former position, wrapping her arms around Donna so that only their heads were sticking out of the blanket.

- Bats? - she asked skeptically . - No. We don't hang upside down. And we don't squeak.

- And we don't...? - Donna prompted, smiling. Her head was resting comfortably on her friend's shoulder, and she could see all the signs of a smile on Cam's cheek. Cam turned her head, her blue eyes amused and tender.

- And we don't cling! - Before Donna could protest, Cam continued: - We're kissing!

And they kissed.

***

Ummm... A few months later 😊

Tom Rendon went into the room, unpacked his bag, and arranged his things in the closet as he was used to. He glanced wistfully at the bed, wishing more than anything that he could fall in for ten hours, but there was no time, he had to go to a meeting with the bosses. The desired sleep was delayed, but he would sleep at this night without the interruptions that had so exhausted him. Who knew that a small child is not only smiles, baby talk and cute photos? Tom, of course, loved his son, but at night he often wanted to run away from the crying, the reason for which was always different and so difficult to understand. So Tom was cravenly happy to go to the United States, although he was a little worried about how his wife would cope with the child alone. Although she seemed to have infinite patience with the baby. She was paying so much attention to him that she probably wouldn't even notice her husband's absence. Tom realized that he was getting annoyed again, and tried to turn his thoughts to work and the upcoming exhibition. He will have a day full of communication and new technology and software. Let's go!

After a few hours, Tom lost any remaining enthusiasm, tired of socializing. Fortunately, the bosses called a break. Tom found the quietest place, had a quick lunch, and decided to walk around the Comdex alone. With the working group, they were constantly in the computer game zone, but Tom was interested in seeing the rest. He was moving from stand to stand when he realized that the path ahead was closed, there was a large crowd of people, each of them trying to get closer to one of the stands. Tom looked around with interest, trying to figure out what was going on, and suddenly saw that Cameron and Donna were in charge of everything at this stand. He spent the rest of his free time trying to get closer or get their attention, but there was so much noise and so many people around that it didn't work out. Tom looked at his watch and went back to his work.

Finally, the work negotiations were over and everyone went to the party. Tom drank a couple of cocktails, but couldn't relax. Then he got bored and left. He went down to the reception and spent a long time trying to persuade the hotel employee to tell him the number where Cameron Howe was staying. Finally, he recognized the number, which was two floors lower than his room. Tom hesitated, but a few minutes later he was knocking on the door. No one opened it. Past him along the hall were participants of the exhibition of various degrees of intoxication, from somewhere in the distance came music. Apparently, Cam was at one of the parties. Tom went back to his room and lay down on the bed. But sleep would not come. He tossed and turned and couldn't get his ex-wife out of his mind. He was very surprised to see her and Donna together. The last time he'd seen them in the same room, they'd barely spoken. And Joe Macmillan wasn't around, so did he leave Cam alone? Of course, it is possible that Tom did not notice him, but this is unlikely, the man was too tall. What he knew for sure was that Cam could never work with Donna and Joe at the same time.

Three hours later, Tom couldn't sleep, so He decided to try his luck again. After standing at the elevator for 10 minutes and repeatedly pressing the call button, he realized that the elevator was not working, and went down the stairs. There was no one in the hall, and even the light was dimmer. It was getting late, but Tom remembered that Cam was more of an owl than a lark, so if she was in the room, he wasn't likely to wake her. He knocked on the door and listened. There was silence outside the door. Tom knocked again, waited a minute, and accepted the failure. He went to the elevator, pressed the button, remembered that it wasn't working, and turned toward the stairs. He had almost reached the turn to the stairwell when he heard the sound of the elevator approaching, turned around, and saw a couple kissing and embracing as the doors opened. Not wanting to get in the way, Tom took a step around the corner, but he couldn't bring himself to walk away and look away, because it was Cameron and ... Donna. Donna??? Tom did a double take.

The two women broke the kiss and stepped out of the elevator. Their hair and clothing were in disarray. Tom disappeared around the corner and leaned back against the wall.

- Donna, you're crazy, - Cam gasped. - I hope there's no camera in the elevator.

- I hope there is, - came Donna 's sensual voice. - I'll buy the tape from them and we'll watch it if we ever get bored.

Cam laughed, then said softly, "I love you."

These words are! Tom had waited so long for them from Cam, and she had never said them first, always in response to his confession. Interested in the silence in response, Tom cautiously peeked around the corner and realized that there was no risk of being seen - Cam was holding Donna against the hallway wall and they were kissing passionately, the white spots of Donna's hands sliding down the dark jacket on Cam's back. Tom was moved by the sight and could not turn away. He watched as Donna's hands cupped Cam's face, then she stopped the kiss and looked into Cam's eyes and panted:

- I love you, too, and I want to get into our room. Together. Now.

- Maybe there are cameras in the hall, too. - Cam chuckled. - You can start a collection.

Donna wrapped her arm around Cam's waist and pulled her down the hall. Cam's arm went around Donna's shoulders and rested playfully on her chest. Donna paused in front of the door to their suite and searched her pockets for the key. Cam pressed against her back, both hands under Donna 's blouse.

- Cam, you're not helping. - Donna turned her head to Cam. Cam kissed her, smoothly running her hands over her body. When their lips parted, Cam murmured:

- Actually, I'm helping. - She raised her hand to Donna's face and showed her the key she had taken from her pocket. - After you, Mrs. Garrett.

- Cam... - Donna gasped.

She grabbed the key, opened the door, and stepped inside. Cam didn't lag behind, as if they'd been practicing this move for years. The door slammed shut.

Tom wiped his brow, suddenly drenched in sweat. He forgot what he wanted to talk to Cam about. He could barely remember where his own room was . On the way up, his mind raced through memories of Cam and Donna's interactions, trying to figure out when it had started. And who the hell is Mrs. Garrett?

_________________________

BONUS

Look at the strange proof of my soulmate theory! Cam sometimes keeps her hand in her pocket when she's around Donna! I found this by accident.

[sushigal007]

Time for Joanie to join Orpheus in University. Bye Joanie! Sorry I forgot to tell you to pack the computer!

[nunjatortle]

Bye bye Scarecrow, hello old world I'm moving back into your shitty dump It leaks every time it rains and I'm in here wracking my brains I'm drinking vodka from a dirty coffee cup I always thought I knew once I shot through That I'd be sure of what I was giving up And the feeling of relief I'd get from getting up to leave was never meant to be Coz now you've gone and fucked everything up

And to hear me talk you'd guess I'd be the first to walk and that I never dreamt that I'd be missing you so much Everyone here gets the joke Everybody except you It must be lonely at the top So let me lighten up your mood The down side is we're all about to get royally fucked And the upside is we're all about to get screwed But in spite of it all we'll miss you more than you miss us And I'm gonna miss you so much

Bye bye Richie, Chachi, Fonzie, Ralphy, and Joanie Cunningham... But when you go I'm gonna miss you most Scarecrow Scarecrow I’m gonna miss you most