#Just because I think Callum made a bad choice doesn't mean I think he made the wrong one

[imminent-danger-came]

Honestly, if Sarai actually knew to ask all the right questions about Dark Magic, that almost makes it worse that she went along with it anyway. She said all the ways that DM was bad then went along with it and said "oh well, gotta support my husband, y'know?" If Callum did that, people would be raking him over the coals for all time.

GIRL. WHY ARE YOU STILL HERE.

[kradogsrats]

I'd Do Anything (... But I Won't Do That)

This started out kind of weird and petty but then turned into an actual thing about the relationship of Viren's character arc(s) to the Arc 2 "I'll do anything for you" theme, because that's actually pretty important for the context of how both Callum and Claudia will have to confront the same conflict.

Pictured: Do NOT take a shot every time we get a callback to this line, you will die.

Basically, the petty part is that I think evaluating Viren's Arc 1 decisions through the "I will do anything for my family" lens is... disingenuous is too strong a word, but maybe simplistic? The "Viren doesn't reveal/offer the egg to save Harrow's life because he's too preoccupied with hanging on to his own power" take has never sat right with me because the real core problem of Viren is a lot more complex than just "he's lying (to himself)," it's a whole pattern of denying his own agency in doubling down on his mistakes. He'll make one bad/selfish decision, and it becomes a cascade of subsequent actions that he sees as being unavoidable, but that aren't necessarily even informed by the same reasoning or values as the initial decision. Like everything else in Viren's dream, Kpp'Ar's take that his choices are all oriented toward power is both accurate and not necessarily as literal as it seems.

Because, like... Viren's not actually a manipulator or even much of a planner—he's a very skilled opportunist. That's why all his choices wind up being based entirely on the context of past choices, and frequently make no sense when you look at them from a "hey buddy, where exactly do you think you're going with this" angle. It also contributes to why he's so desperate for control all the time, in that he acts primarily in a reactive way rather than proactively, which is always an inherently less secure position.

Pictured: The kind of statement that definitely always leads to things going super well.

Even taking the egg in the first place is a reactive decision—not that he doesn't make a choice there, or that he doesn't choose power over the threat he believes the egg poses, but he did actually walk all the way up the Storm Spire, fight five or six Dragonguard, and get kicked down a flight of stairs with the intent of destroying it. He didn't argue with Harrow about destroying it while secretly planning to take it for himself. He only even thinks of it as a weapon because Tiadrin planted the idea in his mind—as an opportunist, the temptation to leave an avenue to power open rather than close it off is what he can't resist. He sat on Sarai's last breath for ten years waiting for a chance to weaponize it to maximum effect, he can sit (figuratively... or literally, I'm not gonna stop him) on the egg for as long as it takes for an appropriate use it to appear. Tiadrin even specifically encourages that he not "waste" it, both specifically by destroying it now, and implicitly by using it too quickly and foolishly.

Pictured: Smart mom, dumb ass.

Tiadrin's angle, of course, is that the longer Viren hangs on to the egg without actually using it, the higher the chance it can be recovered. She doesn't know that Viren will leave things in a state where the assumption is that the egg was destroyed, meaning no one will think to try recovering it, but that's not really her fault and it still pays off.

The gamble Viren makes, on the other hand, is that the opportunities the egg affords will be worth the risk of it somehow falling back into Xadian hands. If the egg returns to Xadia alive, he's back to square "his name will be vengeance" in the game of We Killed the Dragon King. So yeah, you could say Viren values keeping the egg over Harrow's life, but in doing that he's actually operating largely on the exact same values and beliefs that made him argue for destroying it in the first place. It's just that his prior choice of risking humanity's security for the sake of potentially world-altering power has backfired in the context of an immediate and direct threat to Harrow's life. Really, the entire rest of s1 and s2 are him doubling down specifically on keeping the egg from returning to Xadia while also milking the opportunities coming from that course—e.g. the egg cannot go back to Xadia, therefore Callum and Ezran cannot return to Katolis either with or without it (knowing their goal is to return it to Xadia, which it will be difficult to stop them from doing once Ezran is king), and that means someone has to take the throne. If the egg can't be recovered, their only hope is a decisive first strike against Xadia, so someone has to mobilize the Pentarchy immediately. None of them are things he planned in the sense of "well, if Harrow dies then I can get his sons out of the way and make myself king, and then conquer Xadia." It's all reactive to the situation with the egg. You could argue that he'd do the same things if the egg wasn't a factor, like it's possible he's always been kind of lying in wait to push Harrow's sons aside and seize the throne... but if that was the case, he'd really do much better to make a bid for regent like any normal evil advisor would.

Anyway, all of that does still undermine the statement that he'd do "anything" for his family (which includes Harrow), and it is ultimately because of that initial choice he made to take the opportunity of power over the certainty of securing humanity's future. It's just not as simple as, "Viren says he would do anything for his family, but he won't sacrifice his own power and ambition." In the wake of his critical failure to prioritize humanity in destroying the egg, he's making choices that do prioritize humanity (from within his worldview that Xadia is an existential threat barely held at bay)... but they're still bad choices because they're all reactive to that original bad choice. It's not that he's working at cross-purposes to what he says his goals are, it's that he genuinely thinks digging his hole deeper will somehow work out positively, or at least better than the alternative would.

Pictured: Another statement that for sure indicates you're doing totally great.

Really though, I don't think you can (or are supposed to) look at the trifecta of self-individuals-world and point to one that Viren—or really any character outside of Callum, Rayla, and Claudia—puts at the top. Part of the whole point here is that elevating one of those at the expense of the others is never going to be the right choice all of the time. Obviously always putting yourself first is shitty, but we get multiple examples of over-prioritizing one of the other two as being self-destructive and dangerous. Consistency isn't supposed to be positive, here—a core part of this arc is likely to be Callum grappling with that, and that's without even looking at what's going on with Claudia.

The other thing is that "I will do anything for my family"-Viren is actually on some level a different character than Arc 1 Viren, such that evaluating one based on the context of the other doesn't actually make sense. We don't get even a hint of the "I would do anything for my family" in the series until s4, after Viren has died and been revived. Yeah, we had it earlier in the novels, but in there it's really about Claudia and her relationship with Viren, not Viren's values or actions. Arc 1 Viren and Arc 2 Viren inform each other as characters, but most of the point is the ways they aren't the same. And while Arc 2 Viren is understandably preoccupied with the concept of sacrificing for family—given that he's been stripped of everything that was in his life except Claudia, who went to terrible lengths on his behalf—Arc 1 Viren is actually quite consistent with how he's laid out in his Tales of Xadia character sheet:

Like, check out those Liberty and Glory statements—not even close to the same ballpark as Callum's "I value those close to me more than anyone or anything" Devotion and "I'm beholden to my inner circle, not some silly kingdom" Liberty, but quite accurate as the through-line on his s1-s3 actions. There's nothing in there about family, because Arc 1 Viren isn't actually meant to be associated with "I will do anything for my family," and he's not lying to himself by not acting consistently with it in Arc 1.

Arc 2 Viren is then a kind of emotional reboot back to a particular point earlier in his life—not necessarily the point before he first did any dark magic at all, but before he did his ill-defined "anything" to save Soren, which is implied in multiple places to be the point where he started in on a spiral that had tangible and fairly rapid effects on his personality and outlook. That's further emphasized by the contents of his dream in s5—seeing him behave in a genuinely loving and joyful way with Soren is shocking, and immediately raises the question of what the fuck happened and why.

Pictured: Healthy coping mechanisms.

Part of what still distinguishes Viren's "I will do anything for my family; however dangerous, however vile" from Callum's developing "I would do anything for you" is that Viren is always deliberately addressing the "things that are so unforgivable, you will never forgive yourself" facet while Callum leaves it implicit because he doesn't really understand and/or want to acknowledge that yet (and also Rayla would probably twist his nose again, which fucking hurts). In how Viren describes it to Terry, he is using that up-front acknowledgement to then essentially abdicate any emotional responsibility for... well, anything at all. The entire "however dangerous, however vile" mantra is another way of denying his own agency, because if he'll do anything, then he doesn't actually have to go through the difficult emotional process of making those decisions and dealing with the aftermath.

Pictured: H-healthy coping mechanisms?

Terry correctly pegs this questionable excuse for philosophy as "not having feelings," and generally not the best approach, because it will do things like lead to a default state of emotional unavailability to your children—oh, wait. I think it's not unlikely that Viren's emotional distancing from what "I will do anything for my family" meant contributed a lot to the degradation of it as his core value and his ensuing Arc 1 state. A lot of what's going on in his s5 dream is that he's being confronted with the consequences of "I will do anything for my family," specifically. He's being forced through an emotional speedrun of what it has cost him and everyone around him, and what has he got to show for it? Claudia, corrupted beyond recognition, proudly repeating his own words back to him.

Pictured: Whatever the opposite of daddy issues is.

Because the whole point of Viren's "I will do anything for my family" in Arc 2 is the challenge of whether he would/will do it all again. If he holds to that value the same way he did before, he'll do whatever it takes to save Claudia—however dangerous, however vile. Most of Viren's moral and emotional stuff has been based on his self-serving resignation to having "no choice." He's so tragically trapped in a chain of spiraling consequences he can never break... except oh wait, he totally can. S5 is all about Viren recognizing the dark magic feedback loop and that he has the agency to break it, and his best and only chance to avoid doing further harm to Claudia is to not be willing to destroy himself that way again, even it it means his death will cause her terrible emotional pain.

We'll see how that works out. Because let's be real: Claudia's gonna Claudia, regardless. However it goes, there's an important narrative precedent being set for both breaking free from dark magic/Aaravos and evaluating the "I will do anything for you" impulse in a more nuanced way.

[raayllum]

Been thinking about it partially as I come closer to it in fanon S6 / divergences where what I'm writing (in prose with zero constraints) vs what I think the show is actually more likely to do (such as in this case) with the Celestial elves because like

If we look at it just from a storytelling standpoint, there's a few things we want to take into consideration.

Why Skywing elves?

Despite being an aspiring and then full fledged Sky mage for most of the series (5 seasons) as his defining... career trait? with Ocean only added at the end, Callum's attachment to the Sky arcanum is incredibly important from a thematic standpoint. I talked about this in more detail in terms of how TDP writes from theme to begin with, but it would not surprise me if a lot of the series fell into place after decisions were made regarding "mage boy has Sky-Freedom powers" and "big endgame big bad is Stars and Destiny embodied," i.e. like what kind of dragon Zym would be in order for Callum to have a reason to sacrifice his primal stone, why have Callum learn Sky magic first, etc etc.

The Celestial Elves, presumably, could've been any group of elves. We know from Tales of Xadia that Sunfire elves had a chant about warding off dangerous Star dragons from the Great Orb, and that Karim-Pharos are poised to be future pawns, so there is a decent link there. It also could've been cool if the Celestial elves had had elves from all over, showing both intergroup workings and that the Stars were bringing them together in some manner.

If Sky and Skywing elves by thematic extension represent Freedom, then it makes sense for these to be Skywing elves who have perhaps forsaken notions of freedom for ideas of pre-determinism or destiny, i.e. our circumstances beset all of our choices, or that fate/destiny is real and unchangeable. To have the same arcanum and similar abilities as Callum, but to already be warped to Aaravos' will / thematic graces of destiny and fate - to amplify what he's scared of and to accentuate what he might become (at least in terms of what he's scared to become).

On that note, I think it makes sense for them

To be Antagonists

Partially this is because of precedent. Most elves, when in groups, have been more antagonistic with one or two rising to the forefront to be allies. We see this in arc 1 with Moonshadow and Sunfire elves, with the majority being antagonists especially at first (the assassins, the Sunfire soldiers) with Rayla, Lujanne, and eventually Janai being allies / exceptions - even if the Sunfire elves as a whole quickly switch to being allies as of 3x08/09. We see this again in S4 with the Drakewood Earthblood elves being mostly antagonists, Terry as more of a grey area, and only N'than (and possibly Mukho the Mushroom mage?) being downright allies. This would mean that Astrid and maybe another Startouch elf might be more sy

Plot / Misc Reasons

Of course, the biggest reason for the Celestial elves to exist is to, presumably, give exposition regarding Startouch elves to the main characters and to extradite subsequent views / philosophy about Star magic and the arcanum (arcana?). If they are loyal to Aaravos, they would likely provide a perspective on Startouch elves different than one Callum might be coming in with and give more credence / context to Claudia's assertions of Aaravos as well, given that she's the one character currently with a positive view of him. It also doesn't seem they can entirely be good guys given their 1) isolationist nature and 2) having not one but two super OP objects that the protagonists definitely need. While they may not end up being villains, I think we can somewhat safely assume they will initially be obstacles, if only in giving tests (of love) like another certain Startouch elf...

[beautifulterriblequeen]

Multiple Choice - a Callum and Aaravos theory

Not to be all Han Solo or anything, but when it comes to Aaravos and magic in Xadia, I Have A Bad Feeling About This.

If there's one thing I love more than corrupt systems, it's breaking them, so let's get to it: please enjoy yet another way that Callum's pursuit of magic could potentially go very wrong for him - and how he can still fix it.

The system, in this case, isn't a monarchy (on either side of the border), wartime tensions reaching forward from the cycle, or a Xadia-wide racial hierarchy.

It's magic itself.

We don't know where it came from, magic. Was deep magic always here? Did one of the Star Touch elves create it, or perhaps choose to make it his bailiwick while others chose things like Justice and Mercy?

Aaravos, I mean Aaravos. If he's basically the god of magic (feel free to view him through a Loki-esque lens here, I am), then of course he's an archmage, and of course he's the only one among the Star Touch elves. Magic is His Thing.

And according to Zubeia, the Dragon Queen, its mages are his prey. We don't know yet what his full intent has been. We only have her millennia-long view from the surface of the planet. There's definitely more to the story, but which direction that story takes us is anyone's guess at this point. However, it seems clear that Aaravos's history during his time in Xadia does show a pattern of him targeting and influencing mages. He certainly has been during the years the show has covered.

What all he did with these mages, besides the manipulation, is also still unknown. But even if all he ever did was pull their strings, he's still choosing magic-imbued beings as his favorite puppets. The most likely explanation for this is that mages and Aaravos have something in common, making them easier for him to work with. Is it just magic? Does their ambition count too? Is there more to it?

I think there's more. I feel there is some deep dangerous secret Aaravos has managed to hide from everyone so far - including us. But just because it's dangerous doesn't mean it's evil, or even ill-intentioned. Do we consider the threat to anthills when we begin construction on a new apartment complex? Usually no. We're busy doing human-level tasks. The ants' welfare is truly not our concern. And most of them will probably be fine... right?

So. What's Aaravos really up to, and what does it have to do with Callum?

Something Rayla believes about Callum made me wonder: in the short story Chasing Shadows, she believes that he, and all humans, can change their destiny (and it's super annoying!). Why is that a human thing only, though?

Arcanums, perhaps. We've all seen the elven peoples get uptight about their own rules and the options they can choose for themselves. It's not just the Moonshadows. Sunfire elves can absolutely be sticklers for tradition - look at my disaster boy Karim over here, willing to go to war against his own people because his sister wants to marry a human.

Bruh.

So here's part one of the theory:

Having an arcanum in you forces your destiny into a certain path.

If you're born with it, you know the path of your whole life - and I don't just mean "serve your people" or "be a warrior" or "be one with nature." There is a very dark side to being locked into your destiny. It means you cannot escape it even if you desperately want to.

*wordlessly points to Runaan and his overly honorbound decisions*

*wordlessly points to Rayla and her overly sacrificial decisions*

*wordlessly points to Finnegrin and his overly fear-driven decisions*

*wordlessly points to Janai and her overly dutybound decisions*

*wordlessly points to Karim and his overly traditional decisions*

I don't need to say anything here, do I? Thought not.

But it's one thing to be born with an arcanum - maybe they know and accept this part of their destiny already. Maybe it's just a subconscious thing they... know.

It's another thing entirely to opt into an arcanum as a free choice. And here's where we get to part two:

Callum thinks he chose his destiny. He doesn't know he just gave it away.

If he just handed his fate to Aaravos by embracing an arcanum (and then one more), his destiny isn't currently in his hands at all. It's in Aaravos's. And the archmage has proven that he, at least, knows that, since he's been pulling at Callum's strings and toying with him for a while now. He wouldn't flex like that unless he was supremely confident - which he is, he always is - he wouldn't show that hand early on like this unless he knew Callum didn't understand what he'd done or how to reverse it.

This theory is about more than dark magic. It's about all magic. Even if Callum could cleanse himself from dark magic and never let Aaravos puppet him again, is he really free? He still has an arcanum. Where did that come from? He's walking around with a couple of magical bona fides stamped on his brain, and I just want to know...

Who crafted the stamps?

If all Xadian magic is some kind of... creation, or spill, or experiment... and Aaravos needs that power back for himself in order to be who he used to be and/or re-ascend to the stars, he's got more than one way to harness it again:

dark magic consumes primal magic - but matter and energy are never destroyed, so... where does that power go? Aaravos has a very convenient black hole symbol right on his chest. Maybe every spell dark mages have ever cast sends him some of his precious primal magic again. It would be a very convenient way of getting desperate humans to do his cleanup for him. And he has all the time in the world.

primal magic won't save anyone from his will - it just harnesses the elves to Aaravos's magic rules and binds their destiny to a predetermined outcome. They've become, in a word... predictable.

There's no way to beat a Star Touch Archmage at his own game. He literally wrote its rules. So what's a bright young kid like Callum to do?

To quote War Games, "the only way to win is not to play."

Callum's in a unique position, in that he knows who he was before he had an arcanum. Back when he could choose his destiny every day, without binding him to some powerful force he doesn't fully understand yet. This might lead him to a very difficult and dangerous choice, and it could break the game, and the world, wide open.

If Callum can choose to learn an arcanum, maybe he can choose to forget one.

If he can un-know the things that bound him to that magic destiny, he'd be free again, of Aaravos's reach and of his influence.

And that's just for him, but if everyone else is trapped too, how can he help them and hurt Aaravos's power grab at the same time? No idea, beyond "someone hand him a powerful magical artifact and wait," at this point, but I'm sure he'll find a way to break something important eventually! Something vital to the structure and distribution of magic itself, preferably.

If he manages to find a way to destroy magic itself, then everyone would be free. There would be no rules binding anyone to Aaravos. There would be no dark magic feeding off its fumes, either. It's theoretically possible that destroying primal magic would undo the taint of dark magic, all in one go.

And we all know how Callum loves to go around ruining ancient and powerful magical objects. Kid's got quite a track record by now!

Maybe he's not done yet. Maybe Callum's true destiny will be both Savior and Destroyer. But he'll have to play his own game to do it - he can't play Aaravos's game and win. He'll have to fight outside of magic itself. And if he's going to put down his most powerful weapon, forged by someone else - by the mastermind himself - and try without it, then he'll need help, just like always.

[mr-and-mr-mitchell]

So what I've learned from twitter this week is that some people would rather a story about Callum having a breakdown from having to 'deal with' Ben's MH and Stuart's cancer, than a story about someone's MH being affected by homophobia. Maybe they don't realise how bad it sounds to suggest that a character's MH issues should be used as a reason for their partner to have a breakdown?? Just furthers the 'Ben and his issues are a burden' narrative.

I still think that Callum won't have A Breakdown, but his struggles and stress will be shown so people need to stop drooling at the chance Ben's MH is gonna be pushed to one side so Callum can Get His Breakdown. I actually saw someone say we've been waiting years for his PTSD story and it made me laugh cause 3 years from a couple of scenes is peanuts compared to how long it's taken for Ben to get a MH story 😬

I think a lot of fans who talk about Callum a lot are fairly new to how soaps work. Sometimes a storyline that seems so obvious just doesn't get used and is ignored for years and years. I mean, fucking look at Whitney, it took 12 years before she Really broke down after killing Leo.

And Ben's had 26 years off and onscreen to develop and still not had his MH explored. When they already gave Callum a PTSD story a few months back, do they really reckon Callum’s gonna have a major MH focus? Over the dude with breast cancer and the dude living through the aftermath of the Nth homophobic hate crime of his life, Callum doesn't stand a chance. But that doesn't mean what he's going through won't be seen and acknowledged, it's just not centre stage, and it's not as big, because his reaction isn't gonna be as big.

And if I hear one more "Callum has to Deal with Ben" I'm gonna lose it. Callum loves Ben for all he is. They're going through a rough time but that does Not mean Callum loves Ben less, or that Ben is something Callum has to endure. We've seen Callum is willing to give up when he's had enough, and when Ben is just trying to cope, how cruel is it to say it's Callum suffering more?

(And like, I get that this route Ben's taken does hurt Callum okay, I Know that, but it isn't Ben's conscious, rational choice, it's survival mode, and Callum is aware of it.)

[raayllum]

I'm a little confused because someone who didn't do anything to Rayla (Marcos) is very different from someone who will do bad things (Aaravos). And Rayla is willing to kill those she thinks fall in the latter category (as with Viren), yet it seems like Rayla could choose to let Aaravos do terrible things over harming Callum (like she implied in 4x07). So if Aaravos is released as a result of Rayla's choice, was that not already foreshadowed?

Again: that's the tricky thing. On the one hand, Rayla refusing to sacrifice Callum is a sign of growth, for someone who's regularly put herself and her wants and loved ones (her parents in S5, leaving Callum during the timeskip no matter how much she wanted to stay and even though she knew it would hurt him) on the back burner. On the other hand, Rayla framing it as only her taking this Risk to get him back, that it doesn't matter what Aaravos-Callum does to her so long as she saves him, is her same old pattern of behaviour.

But even if Rayla does refuse to kill Callum, and that does lead to Aaravos being released, all that means is that Callum's choices - to save her all the way back in 2x07, and to double down on it in 5x08, and possibly to choose to knowingly engage in a scenario that would leave him vulnerable to being possessed again (as we don't know how that'd work without the mirror as an instigator) - have likewise led him to actually free Aaravos. The worst project partner team ever, tbh, because they both fumbled the bag by choosing each other over the world.

S5 made them pretty blatant callbacks to Bloodmoon Huntress' emotional core, not only in bringing in Kim'Dael, but also the whole "stronger together" theme and Rayllum's parallels to Ruthari / these panels.

E: Who I love, where I love, what I love, these are all specific. But to Runaan and those like your parents... Love is rooted in all families, in all creatures. Souls like that feel called to protect everyone as fiercely as those they hold close. [...] Sometimes helping others requires great feats of strength, Rayla. But you are right. Sometimes an act of caring is as simple as being there when it seems no one else is. Both are necessary. 

If 5x08 is Callum's equivalent of 'leaving' in TTM, then he also needs an in-show equivalent to Rayla trying to save him from possession. (Which literally everything indicates she will, ultimately, do so successfully; whether it'll be too late is what's up for speculation). We've seen this a little bit in Chasing Shadows already in terms of themes of loss of sense of self due to sacrifice/trauma + remembrance of self due to Callum and Rayla's bond but like

Literally every sign and plot point thus far has indicated that Callum will only be put into a position where, if he is the one freeing Aaravos, it'll be because he did something for Rayla. Whether that's the coins and the adjourning star magic being more complicated than usual leading to possession, or a more conscious choice regardless of brainwashing... These two and their arc and bond have been interwoven from the very start.

This is also why I've posited I could easily see a scenario where Rayla breaks Callum free of the brainwashing (reinstating her identity as "That's what makes her a hero, that's what makes her Rayla") but is hurt ("Or hurt people I care about" while it pans directly to Rayla / everything about 5x08) or captured or something, and that leads to Callum playing into Aaravos' hands anyway.

"Rayla sparing Callum will be responsible for freeing Aaravos" leaves out the fact that Callum is the one trying to free Aaravos (under possession), after all. Callum's choice was already made; Rayla's will just be a response to it

Callum and Rayla are gonna doom the world, and they're gonna do it together, lmao

[raayllum]

Love the new meta about rayllum needs! You've really hit the nail on the head and I'm wondering how much Sarai's death plays a part in Callum's difficulty with articulating he needs someone who he loves. It's messy since I can see that both his mother's and Rayla's heroics complicate his relationship with them. Plus his self-esteem also might factor in. He might be scared to need Rayla because the last person he needed was his mother who was a hero who left him and died. It's a lot going on...

Re: this meta

Here's the thing: I don't think Callum has a hard time articulating it. I think that factors in a little, him and Harrow struggled with both expressing your feelings, but Harrow's letter was a balm in that regard. I don't think it weighs on Callum nearly as heavily post-2x06. But when it comes to Callum expressing he needs Rayla in action, over in words...

I think Callum has a hard time realizing it needs to be said, because it feels so obvious to him. He's Callum, in his mind he's dorky and clumsy, of course he needs her, at first if only as a defender. Then as a friend - he's the one making the first move on the ice, handing the egg over, etc. Then as the one he's given his heart too, which is why he has all his big heartfelt speeches, and why he jumps off the mountain for her.

Callum has had issues with self worth, particularly in his relationship with Harrow (although that's mostly the s1 novelization, so it's both canon and not tbh) but Callum doesn't have a hard time believing people care about him, or that they should. If anything, he believes that people care about him more than they actually do (with Soren and Claudia, and even Viren) as the show goes on. Even when Rayla can be gruffer and more closed off, after 1x06, Callum never doubts that she cares for him deeply ever again, even if she doesn't always show it in the most obvious ways. He always knows.

Because Callum grew up in a healthier environment, unconditional love is just the bedrock of his life. He was never worried that Harrow didn't love him because he was bad at being a prince, but being bad at princely duties made him chafe in his role as Harrow's son (but again, this is 90% a self internalized thing).

However, Callum is absolutely as scared to lose Rayla as she is to lose him, which is why he makes all the choices he does. Callum believes he can help protect people and has always wanted to try - which is definitely derived from his relationship with his mother, you're 100% right - and s1-s3 is him figuring out the means to be able to do so. Callum believes things will be okay if he can just go with someone and help them. I'll be interested to see more situations in the future where it isn't that simple in terms of practicality / Callum realizing he can't help someone, deep down, until they decide to help themselves