julisebeautytherapy

[1980ssunflower]

the way this is the last frame and last time ill ever see my husbands from their source material 😭💔💔

[melbee]

Melancholy Blues

David Lee Roth x Reader

Summary: The Highs were high... the Lows were low.. When dating a rockstar who is on the road a lot, there’s only one rule. Don’t cry. That means you’ve fallen too deep, and unfortunately you lost the shovel to dig yourself out a long time ago..

Notes: I love writing for DLR there’s not a whole lot of fics with him which sucks.. Hope you enjoy X

Warnings: fluff, a little angst, a little sad :(

Word Count: 1,934 words

I wish I knew when this was going to end. I sat so still behind my desk, staring at the crisp white wall, listening to the faint tick of the nearby clock as it counts down the minutes.. the seconds.. wasted time no.. important time..

I was stuck in a dingy office surrounded by a mass of nearby cubicles and desks wondering how in the hell I got stuck with a job like this, and how I managed dating a rockstar at the same time.

While I sat filing papers, setting appointments for my boss, writing up reports in hope I’d be the lucky girl picked for a star promotion- my boyfriend toured the world, singing to 50,000 fans every night- partying till the sun comes up definitely surrounded by the excesses of pleasure including girls.

I didn’t know how luck could be in my favor so much, that it managed to drown me at the same time. I scribbled aimlessly trying to muster up the strength to get this assignment done. I worked as a reporter, but I really wanted was a step-up... a position to manage my own fashion company. It was lost hope.

Somehow I managed to get through toward the end of the day, as I turned my head to see nearby coworkers at their desks begin to pack up, the sun beginning to prepare a descent onto California’s glimmering hills.

I sighed and stood up a crack within my legs sounded out, telling me I had sat for too long- as I gave my best attempt effort at a long stretch. I gathered my work and shoved it into my cabinet, fishing for my purse and keys and making my way toward the elevator.

Exhausted was an understatement. I couldn’t help however, to think of David... as often as I do. I thought about what he was doing at this very moment. Where he was, who was with him.. Jealousy reared it’s ugly head- or started to- but I shut it up quickly as the doors opened and I made my exit out of the building.

The drive home was short but my mind was swamped, I couldn’t get out of it, and I knew there was a simple solution for that. Wine.

As I opened my door I was greeted by my little cattle dog that Dave had gotten me for my birthday a year prior, Minnie. I smiled as I patted her affectionately, as a wave of emotions crossed me. I missed him, a lot.

I set my purse down as I made a bee-line to my kitchen- grabbing a bottle of the finest-cheapest wine I had and a glass as I poured generously. I traveled my way to my living room where I drew the curtains to the view so wonderful, of other apartment buildings, and the peek of the hills and the sun if you strained your head far enough. It wasn’t much..but it was home.

It reminded me of how David has wanted me to move in right before tour; I told him I was fine living here, and the adjustment of a big house just wasn’t what I wanted to feel at the moment. The truth was I didn’t want to be there alone, without him. Waking up to the smell of his sheets and his clothes that he left..

I had already found myself doing that while he was away from the various jackets, shirts and underwear he had left behind here. It was creepy. It made me sick to my stomach as I sipped my wine in a daze. I knew the feeling all too well, but I just didn’t want to admit it. I never fell quick, but with David... good god he made it so easy.

I checked the time on the clock nearest to me. He said I could call any time, but I always like to align it so I would get a sure answer from him- he should be somewhere in the U.K. right now..

I made my way over to the side table and set my wine down and my body down onto the couch, and grabbed the phone.

Oh shit, what was the number to the offices..? They always knew the numbers to call wherever the band was. Usually I would wait for David to call, but I needed to hear his voice desperately. God, aren’t I lovesick fool?

I dialed the offices and they redirected me to the number where the venue was, who then directed me to the phone in the dressing room. As I waited for someone else to pick up the phone I wondered if my girlfriends ever have to deal with this incessant worry with their boyfriends. Maybe so, but as prissy as it sounds, their boyfriends aren’t international rock stars.

“Hello?” I heard the sound of an unfamiliar woman pick up the phone, and I couldn’t help but feel my heart begin to pick up and race a mile a minute. Who was she? Did she know David? Were they having an affair?

It took me a time to realize I still had not said a word but simply breathed into the phone like some scary psycho stalker. “Er-Yes. Hi.. uh is this.. David Lee Roth’s dressing room?”

I heard a mumbled sigh from the female on the phone, “Look girl, I don’t know how to break it to you.. he isn’t interested as I’ve told the other girls. He has someone right now..”

My heart stopped beating, “What? Who? I.. who are you?” I asked as my worst thoughts and fears seemed to come before me, I felt my mind go light-headed.

“I’m the designers assistant? I don’t know who you are-but..” she began to ramble on, as I felt my emotions turn red hot.

“Look designer.. whatever the hell you are.. I’m y/n.. his girlfriend. I don’t care if he has somebody I need to talk to him NOW. Do you got that-“ before I could even finish my rant I heard a squeak and a jumbling that sounded like the phone was being tossed around before I heard a scruff voice.

“Y/n? This you?” I heard the familiar voice of David’s manager over the phone, and I lept with joy.

“Hey Noel! It’s me!” I said into the phone.

“Oh hey!” He chuckled a bit, “I’m guessing you wanted to talk to DLR huh?”

“Yes..” I laughed, but I soon realized that now I needed to address the elephant in the room. “Uh..Noel. Would you be honest, and tell me if he was.. with someone right now..?”

I heard a laugh, “I wondered the same thing for a while, as far as i’m concerned the man has had blue balls the entire trip. He’s as clear as a whistle.”

I blushed, “Well okay.. can I talk to him?”

“He’s coming in right now actually-” I heard a shuffle and the conversion between two people, before I heard a loud slam, and the phone being picked up again.

“Dollface?” I heard the beautiful, gruff sound of my boyfriend’s voice, and I couldn’t help but smile brightly.

“Yes Blondie, it’s me..” I laughed. There it was again, that heart pounding. It scared me shit-less because I knew I was a puddle of mess whenever he talked  to me; even if it was a thousand miles away.

“Oh Baby.. you don’t know how much I miss you..” He purred. “How’s my little Min Pin doing?”

I looked over to Minnie, to see her gazing at me, her tail wagging, “Missing her Daddy..”

I could hear the smile in his voice, “Baby, is everything alright? Not that this isn’t unpleasant but.. why’d you call?”

I frowned as the details from earlier flooded my brain, as I crosses my legs, beginning to chew my lip for a whole other reason entirely. “David..who is your designer’s assistant, with you on the road?”

“Sherrie.. I think is her name.. why?” He asked

“She told me you-” my voice suddenly cracked and I felt my emotions edging the surface of my eyes. Don’t break the only rule...

“Doll.. what’s wrong? Did she say something nasty to you? I swear ill sack her, and you’ll never have to see her-”

“David, she said you are with someone right now. She mentioned other girls calling.. David..please be honest with me.. Did you-” I began to say but I didn’t finish before he cut me off.

“Y/n I’d never in a million do that. Why would you believe her?” He asked.

“I don’t know, I’ve just been having a really hard time since you’ve been away David, I can’t even think about normal stuff, without thinking of you.” I said into the phone as my voice ended to a whisper as if I had shared my innermost feelings to a stranger.

“You don’t know what you do to me..seriously.” He said to my utter confusion. “I’ve fallen in love with you, Doll. It scares me shitless. Don’t think I don’t feel the same way you’re feeling.”

I smiled, “The aches?”

“Chills down the inches of my spine, I feel as if I’m an addict who can’t ever get a fix. Y/n, it makes me mad.. because every-time I try and take my mind off you, everything begins to settle in that I’m terrified because I don’t want to live in a world without you.”

“David I’m sorry, I just. I know I’ve been so hesitant.. It’s just..” That was it for me. I felt the years worth of heartache, messed up feelings, love, desire, laughter all explode down my face as I sobbed. “I’m in love with David Lee Roth and I don’t think I can ever stop.”

I heard a pause, before he spoke again, “Then don’t.”

I paused as my heart seemed to stop beating that very moment. “W-What..?”

“Lets be in love forever. Quit your job. You wanted a job to build your own company? Well I need a CEO for my new business, and baby you’re at the top of my ‘for hire’ list. Come with me, let’s go around the world.”

“David..do you know how crazy you sound right now? Like crazier then normal?” I said as I took in his scheme that seemed off the hook, and way out of my comfort zone.

“Baby, I’ll take care of all of it. If you want a pay roll to feel secure I’ll give you one. how does 300,000 a year sound? You can buy you a nice apartment.” He said as he laughed.

“Holy shit.. David I could never buy anything expensive like your apartment.” I laughed as I twirled the cord.

“You’re right.. you’d be so sick in love, in-bed with me to even buy one.” He laughed loudly at his own joke, and I just rolled my eyes a blush forming my cheeks.

“I’ll be coming home soon, love. We can talk more about it then, hmm?” He asked over the phone.

I simply smiled, as I felt tiny tears come down to signal to me how much I truly cared for this man. “Okay. I love you..”

“I love you more.. Au revoir! We’re heading to Paris tomorrow..” He said as I heard a door opening and noises of people rushing in.

“Bye David..” I hung up the phone as I set it down, and I looked at the abandoned wine, and looked toward the windows to see the sun had finally set, and the night had begun.

I had broken my one rule. I wish I regretted it, but the high of it all just felt so good that I wished I would be too sick, too un-well so I would be able to feel the impending crash and  burn...

[swearronchanel]

9.08

wow i cant even think too busy crying

Reggie and Fred 🥰

Ok but is setting all this shit on fire in the middle of the street not some barbaric ass move or is it just me LMAO?

Trixie looks great as always, I still want the white hoops

NURSE CRANE AND THE WRESTLING LMAOAOAO GET OUT LOVE IT

that’s a pretty veil

Shot gun wedding time

This guy is hella familiar ?? Was he on Downton or something?

Poor Elsie

Val giving me sailor vibes lol

Phyllis gives me the vibe of older lady’s who chug beer and yell from the nosebleed seats at baseball games aka me in 40 years

How dare you say Nonnatus’ is unimportant mr tight vest LMAO

I love that Phyllis is making him a sweater LMAO why is it so funny to me

DISCOTECH, Sister Hilda is deff the “cool” nun

You’re telling me that poplar will throw a fundraiser/charity sale thing  for anything BUT to save their building??

Sister J’s voice breaking 😢

SAVE NONNATUS 1k65

THEY NEED RENT MONEY

Oh noo they’re gonna kill Elsie off today huh

I forgot Phyllis is a vegetarian, good on her I could never lmao

“Don’t go crying, not in all that eye black” 😭

Throwing up blood oh shit not good

Omg cancer of the esophagus? Jesus

WAIT HE HAS TWO BABY MOMMAS??? BIG YIKESS

SISTER HILDA SHOWING MCNULTY HOW TO DANCE LMAOAOAOA why do I love this?

SISTER PJ’s PAMPHLET “HOW TO DANCE SOCIALLy” LMAOO

“No one wears plimsoles to the discotech” 😂 plimsoles are like white sneakers right?

you really have to be an addict to wanna play with needles and inject yourself all the time 🥴 Issa no from me

The midwife with the curly perm 🤣

Ok I agree sister Hilda deff has a soothing voice. Her accent is very velvet-y

Poor Val this is so heartbreaking 💔Let me call my grandmas after this

Wow there goes my stream 🤬🙄

ok I’m back

“Every land mark I ever knew seems to be falling down” 💔

Sister J and Lucille comforting Val ugh this is too many feels

I can’t wait till this cheating ass mf gets caught LMAO

OFC Phyllis would be the one to notice the missing drogas

Fred checking his watch is a mood like he does not have the time for this shit LMAO

Councilor Buckle you better step it up LMAO

TELL HER PHYLLIS!

Sister Hilda’s voice is actually calming me rn LMAO ((my laptop has been stressing me out all day))

LMAO THIS IS IT OMG

HE CAUGHT

SMACK HIM UP MOMMA!!!!

HE DESERVES MORE THAN A HANDBAG TO THE HEAD HE NEEDA CATCH THESE MF HANDS LMAOAOOA

Phyllis is like what the fuck is going on here today??🤦🏼‍♀️😂

Elsie coming home 😢my freaking heart

Now they’re both gonna be in the maternity home OFC

Ugh I cant deal this hits too close

LET TRIXIE SPEAK

ALSO LET ME SIGN THE PETITION

“Oh no” LMAO ofc they’re put next to each other

NOW EDDIE SHOWS UP OMG GET OUT LMAO

“You’re loving her. That’s the only medicine she wants” stop omg my heart 💔😭

CTM don’t you dare make me feel bad for this guy lmaoo

Sister MJ 🥺 angel on earth

“The good stuff” is that not suspicious to anyone who doesn’t already know?

“She was here the night you were born. I recollect her” Ok I’m hysterical bye

Sister Hilda is underrated and I’ll keep saying it lol

Eddie with the 2 bouquets 😂

“I grew up arching women brawling in the street...but I’m not gonna fight you for him.” Remember the brawl from the pilot ep

YES TRIXIE YOU SPEAK!!!

“They gritted their teeth and that’s just what I’m doing now” ugh this is too much

I won’t ever have a baby bc Phyllis Crane can’t be my midwife so why bother LMAOO jkkk

poor Petra tho :((

“A memory like a firework exploded in my mind”

GRATITUDE LETTERS 🥺

GOD D*MN IT SISTER MJ HAS DONE IT AGAIN

“I was never more proud of you when I saw you wearing that [nonnatus uniform]” 😭😭😭

I am in actual tears and I can not deal

And McNulty is down

GOD SISTER FRANCES WHERE IS THAT VOW OF SILENCE BC UR NOT HELPING LMAO

The community rallying for Nonnatus we STAN 

ARE THEY SAYING “PISS OFF OF OUR MIDWIFES” LMAOO I CANT HEAR AND HAVE NO SUBTITLES RIP

“I prefer to be referred to as NURSE Franklin in a professional setting” YES MY QUEEN !!! TELL HIM

NURSE BEATRIX FRANKLIN SAID DOWN WITH THE PATRIARCHY!!

THIS IS THE MOMENT I HAVE BEEN WAITING FOR !!!

“YOU HAVE NEVER ONCE CALLED US BY OUR NAME!! BUT DO NOT THINK WE WILL NOT BE MISSED IF YOU WIPE US OUT COMPLETELY” YOU FUCKING GOO BEATRIX OMGG WHAT A DAMN GOOD SPEECH!!!

BUDGET FUCKING RESTORED HELL YEA

for 12 months is that catch but you know SCREW YOUR CATCH, Nonnatus will go on somehow as long as NURSE Franklin has a say!!!

I mean at least for series 11 they have to make do somehow? We’ll see

NOOO OMG ELSIE CAN’T DIE WHILE VAL ISN’T THERE

I’m literally drowning in my own tears Oh my god

now they’re singing Amazing Grace might as well just rip my heart out with your bare hands 💔😭😭😭😭

Val with the ice cream cone ugh 😢it’s so sad

Reminds me of how I missed my abuelo passing by literally 7 mins. After a 5 hour drive, legit 7 mins late...

They tried to make McNulty go to rehab but he said no, no, noooooo

IM SORRY I NEED TO MAKE MYSELF LAUGH BC IM LITERALLY A SOBBING MESS

I wonder why they never bring up Patrick’s mental health anymore?  like he wan’t magically cured for life 

the “for now” sign on Nonnatus omg

LMDOAOAOA THE FIREWORK OMGGG

FRED THANKS FOR EVERY LAUGH

TRIXIE LOOKS GREAT AND HAD THE RIGHT IDEA LMAO

“I love you Nurse Anderson” MY HEART MAY BE REPAIRED, GIVE ME A WEDDING

Petra lost the baby aww poor gal

wow i’m emo but they all look happy during the bonfire 🥺

Poor Val is breaking but at least she’s got her gals

“Welcome the darkness, embrace it as a canopy from which the stars can hang, for there are always stars when we are where we ought to be...The darkness is beautiful for how else can we shine?”✨✨😭😭😭

She said more that I loved but couldn’t hear it all over the sound of my UGLY CryING

This reminds me of what Sister Hilda said a few eps back ugh I’m having too many feelings let me log off until Christmas 

[12daysofelsarik]

North- Part 2

Day4

Dec 24- All is Found

Okay, so this may or may not be the only TDOE 2019 fic NOT set in the Frozen 2 AU verse, this one is the part 2 of North, which is of course, the sequel to Homeward (message me or reply here if you want the link to either North or Homeward!)

Alarik, Jenny, and Dag belong to @patricia-von-arundel :D

Rated M for bedroom activities towards the end of the fic after they put the kids to bed :P GET IT ELS, GET IT

and I have NEVER IN MY LIFE been more nervous about putting up a fic, so if you’ll EXCUSE ME I am off to hide under my bed, MERRY CHRISTMAS EVE, ONE AND ALL, AND TO ALL A GOOD NIGHT.

*****************

“Mama, when is Papa coming home?” Jenny asked, walking into the room I shared with Alarik. She was rubbing a knuckle at her eyes, green and blurry from sleep, her red hair tousled. She did so look like her father. 

“Pa?” Dag said, trailing behind her, dragging his well worn stuffed rabbit behind him. I scoop Dag up, as his little two year old legs can’t quite reach the top of the bed, and Jenny climbs up onto the bed as well.

I had missed this. I had missed them. Both Jenny and Dag now slept in rooms of their own, and Alarik had been in England for the better part of the month, and I had been sleeping in the room by myself. 

“Papa will be home soon,” I told them. Although that was what I thought for my parents as well. I thought they would be home soon. I thought I would get a chance to see them again. I could be wrong, Alarik might not make it home, a storm might come, he might get lost at sea, he might-

“Mama, are you okay?” Jenny asked, crawling towards her and looking up at her. Even little Dag had a look of quiet seriousness on his face- Alarik liked to call Dag “lilla gubben” - little old man.

“Of course,” I say, forcing a smile on my face. “Would you two like to sleep in mama’s bed tonight?” I ask them.

Jenny’s face breaks out into a wide smile, and all I see is their father, and my heart just sinks. But she says “yes!” and Dag echoes her sentiments.

I let myself laugh. “Alright, cuddle close, scooch in,” I tell them.

Dag lays his head on my lap, while Jenny cuddles by my side. I sing to them the same song Mama used to sing to me and Anna.

Where the north wind meets the sea

There's a river full of memory

Sleep, my darling, safe and sound

For in this river all is found

As Jenny’s fingers intertwine with my own, playing with my wedding ring, I stroke Dag’s nose as I sing to them. I see Dag’s eyes slowly begin to droop, and I know sleep will come for him soon, although Jenny looks up at me still. Even so, she begins to yawn, it being long past both their bedtimes.

In her waters, deep and true

Lie the answers and a path for you

Dive down deep into her sound

But not too far, or you'll be drowned

I barely get the word “drowned” out. It comes out almost a whisper. But it doesn’t seem to bother my children, as Dag as fallen asleep, and even Jenny’s eyes are heavy lidded. 

Yes, she will sing to those who hear

And in her song all magic flows

But can you brave what you most fear

Can you face what the river knows

I tuck the blankets past Dag’s chin, and he is soon snoring softly, his curls flopping over his head, much likes his father. Jenny though, is staring out the window, seemingly transfixed by the Northern Lights outside. I carry her to the window, careful not to jostle, as she’s already half asleep.

I reach the window, and look out into the fjord. Suddenly, Jenny sits up in my arms, and gasps, pointing out at the window. Out on the horizon, sailing towards the harbor, is an Arendellian ship. Not just any Arendellian ship, the same ship Alarik took to England.

“Papa!” Jenny squeals, hands tapping at the windowpane.

 Dag suddenly sits up on the bed. “Pa?” he asks, dazed.

I keep Jenny in one arm, and carry Dag in my other arm, and run out of the room and down the stairs of the castle, not even stopping to put some slippers on. I feel my heart beating a quick staccato as we make our way to the fjord. Just as we reach the docks, I see him. All auburn curls and green eyes and that smile, and before I can do anything else, Jenny leaps out of my arms and runs towards him. 

He walks towards us, and Dag reaches out towards him, squealing “Pa!”. Alarik hoists Dag on his shoulders, as Jenny runs around with the new toy he brought her.

“Darling,” he says to me, smiling. “I-”

Like I always say. Never shut me up with a kiss. Although I do it to him.

He didn’t seem to mind.

*******************

Where the north wind meets the sea

There's a mother full of memory

Come, my darling, homeward bound

When all is lost, then all is found

I finish singing the song as I watch Alarik tuck both the children into bed. 

Once in the hallway, I approach him from behind, lean my head on his shoulder. I bury my face into his hair, and it still smells like the ocean breeze. “I missed you,” I tell him, playing with his curls.

He wraps his arms around me, holding me close, and it feels warm and safe and right, even after so many weeks apart. I feel myself tremble, just a little bit, and he rubs his hands down my arms.

Alarik leans down, his forehead against mine, and closes his eyes. 

“You’re not allowed to leave for that long ever again,” I tell him.

At that, he opens his eyes, grinning as he cups my jaw. “As you wish,” he murmurs against my lips.

I wrap my arms around his neck, pressing against him, whining my need. I’ve missed this. I’ve missed him. 

He pulls back slightly, eyes dark and dilated. “Darling?” he asks.

I can only nod.

At that, he lifts me in his arms and begins to run towards our bedroom, much like that rainy autumn day that eventually led to Jenny. Miraculously, we make it to our bedroom, and he opens the door, kicking his shoes under the bed.

He places me on the bed gently, and I pull him down towards me. He pulls at the sash of my nightrobe, revealing my silk nightdress under it. He’s still wearing his travelling clothes, and I quickly begin unbuttoning his shirt, and he fumbles with the ties on my nightdress, his hands shaking, unusual for him.

“Let me,” I tell him, and as I finish the last of his buttons and deal with my own nightdress.

“Elsa, let me...I-” he begins, but I already have my nightdress off.

“You’ve been away nearly a month, min gås,” I say, silencing his protests with a kiss. “If you think I’m going to wait another moment more,” I tell him, pulling at his trousers, “you’re quite mistaken…”I say as I pull his body down towards my own.

He smiles softly as he positions himself above me. Alarik places a hand on my cheek. “I’ve missed you, my darling.”

I smile up at him. “I missed you too…” I tell him. I pull him down for another kiss, my fingers twisting into his hair. His lips work against mine, before they venture towards my neck, suckling gently. “Alarik!” I gasp. 

His lips find the spot behind my ear, and as he kisses it, I feel the heat pooling in my center already. His hands find my hips, running up and down them, and I feel myself shiver.

He positions himself above me, “ready, darling?” he asks. I nod breathlessly.

Alarik slowly thrusts deep, and I groan at the way he fills me. My legs wrap around his waist, and I pull him closer, urging him deeper inside me. "Ooooh, oh Alarik…"

"Elsa…" he moans as his thrusts deepen.

"Alarik ...please…" I pant, "I need you…"

He pulls out, and then thrusts back in. His lips move from behind my ear down, down towards my breasts, kissing one gently, then the other, and I bite my lip to keep from moaning.

I feel the warmth pooling in my middle, the pleasure building, warm and good. "Yes...yes...ALARIK!" I shout in ecstasy. He thrusts deeper and faster inside me until he releases deep inside me, and I arch into him, before sinking down into the mattress, trembling.

He rolls us over gently to our sides, so that we still face each other. Alarik pulls me closer to him to press his lips to mine, and whispers “jag älskar dig, min älskling”.

“I love you too,” I murmur against his lips. We spend a long time like this, in each other’s embrace, and from the window I can see that the twinkling of the stars. 

And the North star that pointed his way home to me.

[randombtsprincessa]

Aberrations || 1

Author: Randombtsprincessa

Characters: Min Yoongi x Reader

Summary: First Impressions are important, as they say. You and Yoongi just happen to give each other bad ones.

It wasn’t supposed to go this way, I thought to myself dimly as I sat on the edge of the seat, the cold glass of pink liquid swirling in my hand. If it had been any other day of the week, I would’ve just let it all go to hell and taken up my girls on their offer to get me a drink and just spend the night away lazing in the club we were a part of.

I’d decked up in a slinky tank top, a pair of tight glittery pants and knee length heeled boots that would’ve turned heads, especially that of my boyfriend’s, if he’d been here. I took another disgruntled sip from the intoxicating drink and leaned back into my seat, putting my leg up on the glass table in front of the leather couch.

The club Dark Wild lived up to its name with roaring purpose. They kept the exterior simple, black and white brick façade with a neon black and red sign with a withering rose over the entry. It was dark and the cold patchwork tiling around the club gave it a high end feel, which made you feel good about going there. The interior was dark, with flashing lights that allowed complete privacy and yet no one could miss anything. The music thrummed and pulsated in my veins, the trance music lulling me in a welcomed daze.

I loved Dark Wild, I loved coming to the majestic scene that even though could be considered cheap, but it wasn’t. At least not with the amount they charged for a membership.

I remembered the first time I’d come to the club. It had been my first week at college and my best friend Doona and Ara had managed to push and prod me into going to the freshman party which had been held at Dark Wild. There we’d met Yerin and hit it off immediately. The four of us were inseparable now and it had only been a few months till Yerin had managed to convince us all to become members at the club since we never really went anywhere else and you could never be bored at Dark Wild.

Five months later, I’d been the designated driver for the group and while I tried to maintain my slightly more than tipsy friends, I’d bumped into my now boyfriend.

I frowned, the memory going slightly hazy in my buzzed mind.

This was new. I remembered the day I’d met Sehun crystal clearly. I could repeat it in my sleep but lately…

Lately, it had been feeling like the memories of our glory days, the good old days were slipping out of my fingers, like they’d never even been in my grasp. I was scared of that, because the good old days were what I was holding on to in defense to all the time he was losing with me now.

I would never call him out on it.

I wasn’t that girl; the clingy, obsessed girl who couldn’t handle herself without her man for even a few hours.

Sehun was busy, he was trying to get his performing arts degree and it was difficult. He was a dancer and actor and took singing lessons for that added boost so by the time he walked out the class doors and to me, he was only good to flop into my bed and pass out.

It wasn’t like I wasn’t busy either. I had my writing classes, music theory classes, singing, literature and other classes. If anything, recently I’d been feeling busier than Sehun and while he whined that his three classes were taking his soul away, I’d bitten my tongue to keep from complaining about how I was losing both my physical and mental energy.

I had been happy with just singing and writing as extra classes, since they were something I loved doing but since Sehun had once commented about how I’d need more of an added punch I’d signed up for music making classes too. It turned out; I enjoyed them, so naturally I didn’t mind. I was getting ahead and Sehun was happy, it was perfect.

Now, I wasn’t so sure.

He never seemed to be around to seem happy, or maybe that was just me.

“Please, tell me you are not still moping around for Sehun.” A voice moaned from behind me and a sweaty and red faced Yerin dropped down next to me, soon followed by Ara and Doona who looked more than drained. Weekday partying was definitely not down our alleys.

“I’m not moping. You know, I don’t do that.” I pointed out as she neatly plucked my glass out of my hand and threw it down her throat in a neat and almost graceful fling.

“Oh sure, you just haven’t been as cheerful and wild because you’re drowning in classes. Oh wait, that’s not you. Seriously, you’re supposed to be having fun.” Yerin said.

“I am having fun!” I protested.

“Sitting in a corner couch with a single drink is not constituted as fun, Y/N.” Doona drawled. I sighed. Drunken Doona was always cockier than sober Doona.

“She’s right. You look hot today; you should go show off your stuff.” Ara agreed, snuggling into Doona’s side.

“As opposed to how I usually look…?” I asked amused, even as Yerin threw me a disparaging look.

“I did not throw on this awesome dress and drag your butts here for you to sit on yours for the entire night. You will get up, you will go get another drink, you will forget about Sehun for now and you will dance with some random guy who will buy you drinks but you won’t leave with him. Problem solved. Plus, if one of our friends’s here, news will maybe get back to Sehun and he’ll be jealous and he will give you more attention. That’s an added bonus. I’m a goddamn genius.” Yerin let out a wide yawn.

“Or a goddamn idiot,” I muttered.

Sehun very rarely got jealous, he was way too confident, way too knowing of his position in the world and even if he did get jealous, it was never over me. He might get jealous because a spot he wanted in a dance or act was given to someone else or if someone performed better than him and got more praise. These would lead to him showing up on my doorstep and ranting about how the person was clearly a suck-up and how he might have been off his game that day but he was certain to do better and the teacher would see that.

I usually dealt with these situations with silent affirmations and feeding him until he wanted to go to bed or take me to bed. Those were one of the better sexy nights because he needed to prove himself somewhere and what better place to do that but in my bed?

Still, even if those nights were hot, I loved the nights when he would randomly show up with take out, place a sweet kiss on my forehead and we’d eat in front of my TV and then just go to sleep, his head nuzzling mine as he told me about scripts he was working on or a new song. Those were perfect nights with him, nights that never happened anymore.

I had lost my loving, caring boyfriend somewhere in the span of a year and I had no idea how to bring him back, something I now realized my friends had noticed.

I was happy for their support and love. I was also dreading that if they saw this in my relationship; what would it mean for Sehun and me?

I was pulled from my thoughts when I heard Ara suddenly screech. “I know! They say the oldest son is going to take over for MYG enterprises soon. He graduated a few years back and rumors are that no one was hotter on the scene than him.” Ara said.

“Didn’t he have a brother?” Doona mumbled sleepily. I wondered if it was time to get them home as Yerin spoke up. “Yes, he’s probably still in college. Here or somewhere else, I don’t know, but I’m sure he’s hot too.” She said.

“Who…?” I asked.

“The company that owns this place, Y/N. MYG Enterprises, talk is it’s going to change hands soon and that maybe the guy will make a round or two here, if we’re lucky we might be able to see Yoonjin and his brother around.” Yerin said.

“I thought Yoonjin was a single child.” I frowned.

“Yeah, he let out in an interview accidentally that he had a younger brother.” Yerin smirked and I knew that whoever this guy was, he’d better beware because she wasn’t about to spare any expense at her disposal.

“Ok enough about this, can we go get Y/N drunk and on the dance floor, now?” Ara burst out and Doona’s drooping eyes snapped open wide.

“If I’m drunk, who the hell is going to get you guys home?” I asked.

“I’ll call someone; you’re the main priority here.” Yerin waved a hand and I was about to open my mouth to protest but I felt my arms being grabbed and my body being lifted out of the seat and towards the bar.

I have no idea how many shots went down my throat. Maybe it was five, maybe it was ten but by the time Yerin finally raised my arms up and hollered “Who’s the champion?” I had lost all count.

My throat burned, my eyes stung, my head spun, my body thrummed…and I had never felt so amazing in the entire week, which is if you don’t count me deliberately sleeping through my alarm, for 11 hours straight and not regretting a single thing. This was as good as that, even if I was going to be punished by a massive hangover and a patronizing speech from Sehun, if he came around that is.

That was when I’d had enough. It was fine if he showed up, smashed and hammered and I had to take care of him. However, if it was me who was messed up, he grudgingly put me to bed and laughed it off when I suffered the next day, followed by how I shouldn’t be drinking if I couldn’t hold my liquor. Well, I was going to show him I could hold my liquor.

“You know what, Sehun can go to hell! I want to dance!” I screamed and the three girls let out loud screams before tugging each other onto the dance floor.

Turns out, the shots weren’t as much as I thought because they wore off as I came back out from my second bathroom break. My lipstick was refreshed and hair back into place, my top pulled back up where it had been exposing a little too much of my cleavage than I’d have liked.

Ara and Doona were already dancing with new guys while Yerin was clearly chatting up some guy. I watched as the guy, looking star struck, raised a hand and almost in a second a pink cocktail was in Yerin’s hand.

She sipped it with a smirk and looked up straight at me, raising her eyebrows. I looked at her confusedly until she pointedly widened her eyes, her head tilting ever so slight until I understood.

“Get some random guy to buy you a drink but don’t leave with him.”

Her words rang in my head as I looked around but there was not one single guy who was unattended at the bar. I knew Yerin was still watching me so I subtly avoided her gaze, going to sit at the bar, behind the glass partition where she wouldn’t see that I wasn’t chatting up a guy, I was just sitting alone.

I sipped on the custom red drink slowly, trying not to lose the heady buzz in my head. I knew that the second it wore off, I would feel guilty.

I would feel guilty for sitting here; sipping on a drink while my friends encouraged me to use a guy to get more drinks and not going against it while my boyfriend probably slept back home. I would feel guilty for actually waiting for some guy to look good enough to my dazed brain to flirt with while my boyfriend slogged in his work.

Speaking of the devil, my phone buzzed at the same time and one glance at it told me it was my boyfriend, asking me if I was going to come over. Sober me would have said no. Drunk me was going to be petty and ignore the text completely, followed with a snort of disgust and shake of head. Even then, I should’ve felt guilty.

I should’ve also most definitely felt guilty when my eyes caught a boy who looked almost perfect to be the ‘guy’ for the night.

I should’ve felt guilty for noticing the way he slumped in his seat, a single glass of some clear liquid in front of him, as if he was doing the club a favor by sitting in one of its barstools. He was sitting four seats away from me; at the bend of the rectangular bar counter and it gave me the perfect vantage point to study him.

He wasn’t jacked up, or even slightly bulky, instead his body seemed to comprise of smooth muscles, his legs, slim and encased in pale blue jeans that someone seemed to have painstakingly ripped. The sleeves of a grey shirt that clearly emphasized his chest peeked from under his jacket, frayed. The jacket was black, badges stuck on it like medals. I didn’t know if it was the club lighting or the alcohol in my system but his hair was ridiculous. It looked like it was mint green.

Normally, I was the type of person who could curb my curious urges. They always seemed to kill the cat more often than satisfy but I was drunk enough to ignore that small voice that told me not to go and talk to him.

I tossed back my drink, relishing the way it rested, coolly on my tongue but burned its way down my throat, finally ending with spice in my stomach. It added a small boost to my step as I walked to him.

I told myself I wasn’t blatantly checking him out as I neared. I had to admit that the features that looked so small from afar, sharpened nicely with closure. By the time I was standing right next to him, I could tell he was a good-looking man. His hair was also, as I said before was actually a shade of pale mint green.

I was so caught up in staring at the hair; I didn’t notice that the boy had turned his head, watching me stare at him.

“Can I help you?”

I started slightly at the gruff voice before I realized that he was speaking to me. My eyes darted to his face to see him turned towards me, eyebrows raised. His eyes were distinctly cat like, the ends angling up, the dark color glinting in the flashing lights. His skin was pale and smooth, almost like porcelain; I couldn’t help but think it looked pretty.

“I’m sorry, I was just…your hair,” I mumbled out, watching as his eyebrows climbed higher. He reached towards his glass and raised it to his mouth, taking a gulp, his tongue sliding out and running across his lower lip. My eyes watched the motion before meeting his eyes again.

“Yeah, what about it?” he asked.

“It looks cool. I’ve never seen that kind of color before.” I said.

“Thanks,” he mumbled, running his fingers through his hair, turning back, glancing at me once when a ring blared around us. It took me a moment to realize it was my phone and I dug it out quickly, looking disgruntled at the ID.

Sehun.

Why was he calling me now? Did he get home and was looking for some time with me? That happened rarely nowadays. What, did he expect that I would always be around for him to spread out his fingers and I would come to him like a dog? He could stew today.

I let the call go to voicemail, looking back up at the handsome stranger to see him smirking.

“Boyfriend troubles?”

I frowned at that. Why would he jump to that conclusion? No matter the fact that he was in fact correct.

“What, no, I just –”

“You’re just mad at your man so you troll around the club, commenting on people’s hairs? Or were you trying to see if I’d offer you a drink?” he asked.

I blanched, the haze slowly reducing as shock at his rude bluntness fought with the alcohol.

“Just so you know I don’t do that. I’m not into buying drinks for any odd girl who comes about saying my hair looks cool.” He said coldly. I clenched my fist, glaring at the stranger.

Maybe that was why I’d originally sat around but there was no way I’d gone to him for a drink. I was just drunk…and stupid, now it seems. Suddenly it struck me that maybe taking Sehun’s call would’ve been better.

“Of course not! I told you, I thought your hair looked cool. I don’t use that line on people I want buying my drinks.” I said.

“What do you do then? You don’t seem to be like the girl who uses pick-up lines, do you maybe flash them?” he smirked again, his eyes hovering around my neck area.

I backed up, my shock easily melting into outrage.

“What the hell is your problem?” I asked my voice close to screeching.

Had I done something wrong? The only thing I’d done was gawk at him and comment on his stupid hair. Was it a touchy subject?

“My problem? I’m not the one hanging about a club looking for free drinks. Maybe you should move ahead. I hear the guys over there are into that kind of thing. You probably won’t even need to flash them. They’ll let you do that later.” He waved his now empty glass somewhere towards the back where usually the rich kids with no personality at all hung out.

“Screw you…” I trailed off when I realized that I didn’t even know his name.

He laughed a raspy, caustic laughter that made the hair on the back of my neck stand up and a shiver run down my spine at the acid in it. “Sorry, sweetheart, but it’s not your night.” He said, standing up and making me back up as he towered over me, looking me over once with mocking vehemence.

The proximity between us only made my breath catch and I gritted my teeth as my slow and dumb body tried to combat the hypnotic aura oozing out of the man. It definitely wasn’t helping. I could already feel blind hatred cloud his beautiful image in my mind.

I wanted to slap him. Hard, the kind of slap that would echo in the club, draw a few eyes and leave a red mark on his cheek, serving a reminder to never talk to girls like that. He’d basically called me a slut, in way too many sentences.

He smoothly slid away from me as if he could read my mind, zipping up his jacket and tossing me one last smile which would’ve passed for a soft, fond smile between two close friends parting if it wasn’t for the horrible things he’d said to me just a few minutes before.

“Oh, the name’s Min Yoongi.”

With that he turned on his heel and vanished somewhere in the darker depths of the club.

Around me the music kept on thrumming as I tried to hold back an expletive that would most likely be very loud and get me into trouble. Not to mention, if the girls saw me like that, they would ask questions.

There was no way Yerin was going to let some guy call me out on something that degrading and let him walk away. I had his name. She would find him and she would make him wish he’d never been born. Although, it didn’t seem like Min Goddamn Yoongi was the type to wish he’d never been born. He definitely thought he was a gift to God’s green earth.

My phone rang again and this time, I pushed past people to get out of the club before accepting Sehun’s call.

“Y/N? Baby, what’s wrong? Why didn’t you answer earlier?” he asked immediately, his voice going from concerned to demanding in a millisecond.

“Sorry Sehun, Yerin and the girls dragged me to Dark Wild today; I didn’t hear the first call.” I said through pursed lips. “Oh, ok…well, if you’re done, do you want to come over? I’m exhausted and I have your favorite food and movie. We could have a quiet night in.” he said.

I almost sighed in delight. This was my boyfriend, the one who cared about these things for me. Small, meaningful things that made me smile. I nodded even when he couldn’t see me. “Yes please, I’ll be there in a few minutes.” I muttered, walking towards the main road and hailing a taxi. I hung up and sent the girls a quick text, letting them know I was tired and going home.

Leaning my head back on the soft leather, I spat a mental ‘fuck you’ to Min Yoongi again and returned to thoughts of Sehun, pushing back any image of stupid mint green hair that my mind threw at me.

[goldenclosetkook]

Chapter 36

So this chapter is formatted a little differently - it’s more traditional :) I hope you enjoy it anyway. 

<< / 36 / ?

“Hyung?” A pair of warm hands shook Yoongi awake, smoothing down the fabric of his jacket as they withdrew. “Hyung? Have you been here all night?”

Blinking slowly, the scratchy hospital sheets rubbed against his cheek as he moved his head. That’s going to leave a mark, he noticed absently.

“Hmm?” He said, aloud.

The hands returned, one settling on the back of his neck and the other running softly through his hair, tugging the dyed strands in a way that drained the tension from his shoulders. He settled forwards again, shutting his eyes and smiling.

“Babe, come on,” Jimin murmured behind him. “The nurses are starting their rounds, and god knows you don’t want Tae to see us here.”

“Mhfm… Tae?” Some awareness was slipping back to him and he yawned.

“Yeah, hyung. I think he was going to fight you yesterday when you walked in.” Jimin chuckled.

“Fight me? Huh?” Yoongi raised his head, finally, and blinked at the morning light streaming through the curtains.

“Yup,” Jimin was still grinning when Yoongi turned to look at him. “Jungkook totally lit up like a Christmas tree apparently, it was like no one else existed, according to Tae. He clearly loves you so much. You must’ve been a brilliant big brother.”

Yoongi should’ve been listening, he should’ve been able to piece together a sentence, but everything in him was on pause as he stared at his boyfriend. Drowning in an over-sized cream sweater, and dark jeans that did nothing to hide his dancers stature, Park Jimin was looking at him like he held all the wonder in the world. Wide, dark eyes crinkled with affection and a plush mouth stretched wide enough that Yoongi was tempted to kiss him, just to see what that sort of joy tasted like – sweet, like honey, Yoongi mused, but softer, molasses on cotton candy, perhaps.

How someone as perfect as Jimin could deign to love him – him, the man with so much blood on his hands that he dreamt they’ll never be clean – Yoongi would never know, but one thing he did know was that he would die before bringing any harm to this boy.

Jimin was still talking, gesticulating eagerly, and Yoongi acted instinctively, reaching out and snatching one of his hands to hold it in his. Small fingers intertwined with his long digits and Jimin trailed off.

“Let’s go get something to eat,” Yoongi said, grimacing at the remaining sleepy gravel in his voice. He stood and stretched, keeping Jimin’s hand in his the whole time.

The chair he’d been sitting on screeched as it was forced backwards over the linoleum floor and both men winced, looking immediately towards the bed and the sleeping boy in it. Jungkook was still breathing naturally, the invasive tubes and oxygen mask hanging nearby, and Yoongi nearly wept at the sight.

///

When he’d received the one-worded, four-lettered, question-marked text the day before, he’d hardly dared to believe it – had locked his phone and pinched himself hard before opening the message again, half-expecting it to have disappeared – it had happened before. But no. It was still there, blinking at him in stark black and white.

So he ran.

All the way to the hospital, forgetting his wallet, his keys, his jacket. Forgetting to tell Namjoon or Hoseok where he’d gone. Forgetting that he was supposed to meet Jimin later for dinner. Forgetting everything except his brother – his little brother who’d been in a coma for two years, who’d missed his first mixtape, who’d not mourned the closing of their favourite lamb skewer shop with him when the owner retired.

His little brother. Min Jungkook. The brat who’d fought him for the computer when they were children and lost; the first person to not care that he was gay; the only person he’d willingly shared first draft lyrics with; the kid who came to only him when he fell over and scraped his knee; the child who’d crawled into his bed during thunderstorms and made Yoongi sing him to sleep. His little brother, who he’d never thought he’d laugh with again. His little brother, Jungkook, was awake.

And he was there, sitting propped up against the pillows, a tired grin on his face and naïve, bunny eyes staring at the young nursing volunteer, who was chatting at him about rabbits on the moon. And Yoongi may not have seen his brother speak for two years, but he recognised the familiar symptoms of a growing crush immediately.

He’d coughed, just enough to announce his entrance, and Jungkook had twisted so quickly he’d made himself dizzy. Yet even being forced to lie back against the pillows by the handsome volunteer hadn’t deterred him from yelling for Yoongi.

“Hyung! Hyung! You came! I read all your messages! I mean, well-” the boy faltered suddenly, and Yoongi winced, moving towards the bed quickly.

“Hey, Kookie. It’s been a while, eh?” He reached out but left his hand hanging, just in case his little brother had a new opinion of him, an awful opinion of him. He remembered writing about Suga in those dark hours of the morning with only Jungkook’s phone number open in front of him. He didn’t want to know how far back through his messages Jungkook had read.

“Hyung!” His hand was grabbed in a fist that felt twice as large as he remembered it being. Jungkook had recovered from the moment quickly and was grinning again. “You came to talk to me. I knew I heard you! I missed you!”

A quiet huff from the sandy-haired volunteer reminded Yoongi that they weren’t alone, and going by the glare being thrown his way, his brothers growing crush was not unreciprocated. Inwardly, Yoongi smirked.

“Yes, Jungkook here has been telling me all about his amazing hyung, Min Yoongi. So it’s nice to meet you finally,” the boy said and Yoongi laughed.

“ It’s nice to see you too, Taehyung. I see you’ve become well-acquainted with my little brother, so you can drop the pretending-we-don’t-know-each-other thing, please.”

Jungkook looked between the two, mouth slightly agape. “You two know each other?”

The way Taehyung immediately turned to answer him made something warm unfurl in Yoongi’s chest – he recognised the same softness on the boys face in his own actions towards Jimin.

“Your brother is dating my best friend – has been for a couple of weeks now. It’s absolutely sickening.”

There was a moment as Jungkook seemed to take in this information, before he suddenly smiled, responding with a tone that had Yoongi narrowing his eyes.

“So, Taehyung,” Jungkook’s expression was nothing less than coy, and Yoongi didn’t like it. “I suppose we’ll be seeing a lot of each other then. Maybe we should… get to know each other.”

“Jungkook!” Yoongi yelped. “You only just woke up! No flirting!”

The unrepentant shrug he got in response was enough to shock a startled laugh out of both the standing men.

“Well then,” Taehyung shook his head slightly, amused. “I’m required to assist another patient soon, so I’ll be going. It was nice to see you again, Yoongi hyung, and Jungkookie? It was great to finally have a conversation where you talked back.”

With that, he collected his pen, moved the folder detailing the patient statistics back into its designated position at the end of the bed, and moved towards the door. Before leaving, however, he turned back and winked.

“You know, you’re a lot prettier than I thought you’d be. My number’s on the napkin, so call me soon, cutie.”

“I’m-what? Did he jus-huh?” Jungkook spluttered as the volunteer disappeared down the corridor, and Yoongi laughed again, dragging the corner chair over to where his brother lay and sitting down beside him.

“I missed you, Kooks. It hasn’t been the same without you hanging round me and asking about-.”

“I know, hyung,” Jungkook interrupted, and Yoongi could see a sliver of the cheeky kid he’d known two years ago resurfacing. “But I’m awake now. And you’re dating? Tell me everything! I need a complete, day-by-day Min Yoongi update.”

And despite it already being almost five in the evening, Yoongi stayed and talked and talked until the both of them fell asleep.

///

“Hyung? Are you listening to me?” Jimin asked him now, bringing the man out of his reverie.

They were still standing in the hospital room, and Jungkook slept on, unaware of the conversation happening next to him.

“Yeah, Minnie, I’m listening.” He murmured back, leaning over to brush strands of greasy hair off his brothers forehead. “Breakfast first, then we’ll go get past your house and get some of Jin’s clothes for Kooks. I heard you, sunshine.”

He didn’t have to turn around to know that Jimin was blushing at the pet name.

“We’ll be back soon, Kookie.” He whispered, and quietly led the way to the door, one hand still firmly entwined with Jimins.

“Hyung?” Jimin asked once they were outside the hospital. “Would you really have tried to… y’know… end it… if Jungkook had died?”

His boyfriends voice trembled as the question was left in the air, and Yoongi found he couldn’t answer.

“I don’t know, Jimin. Maybe.”

A glassy look came into Jimin’s eyes and he sniffled. Yoongi’s heart ached at the sight and he wrapped his arms around the younger boy, dragging him in until they were pressed chest to chest and heart to heart, beating in time with each other.

“Maybe I would’ve tried. But I would’ve had you to guide me back. To make me see that things can be better. I-” Yoongi swallowed, throat clicking. “I love you, Jimin.”

There was a pause.

Jimin pulled back, eyes wide. “I- ”

The sudden, loud ringing of two phones broke through the tension, and Jimin laughed awkwardly, untangling himself to dig his phone out.

“Anything important?” Yoongi asked and Jimin shook his head.

“Nah, just Tae being Tae. What about you?”

“Not sure,” Yoongi pulled his phone from his pocket and scrolled to the latest message.

Jimin waited patiently as Yoongi typed out a clipped response and stuffed his mobile deeper into his jacket.

“So,” he smiled once both phones were out of sight, and Jimin smiled back at him, unaware of the panic that had settled in the older mans stomach. “Breakfast?”

[yoongisbbydoll]

transcendence, 02

⇢ pairing  ─  min yoongi, reader (+ park jimin and jeon jeongguk)

⇢ genre ─  vampire

⇢ count  ─  2,551 words

⇢ warnings  ─  smut, gore, blood and death in metaphorical sense

⇢ synopsis  ─  We are all born into the light, die in the dark. The two phases are linear—start and finish—two definite points in time. But you are unique, crimson in both birth and death, lustful and dark. It stings your eyes and drips down your throat like liquid fire. And for you, there is no escape.

[ chapter index ; here. ]

Quiescence 

Moving to America from the ghettos of up-and-coming European cities was not Yoongi’s original plan. But, he was intrigued by the New World and had an inkling in the back of his mind that it might be an opportunity to live normally instead of lurking in the darkness as he had been for the past few hundred years. With the curve of the 1800s in full swing and news of prosperous business across the Atlantic, Yoongi packed up the little belongings he could call his own and bought himself a one way ticket to the New World.

He didn’t expect much, he would settle in one place for a few years until people questioned his youthful face and then he’d move along. He used this tactic to journey his way down the east coast until the Great Depression struck and he was let go from his job and was evicted from his apartment. Once again, he had nothing left to lose.

It was on one of those nights that he had curled to the darkness of alleys and held his prized possessions close to his chest that he met Kim Seokjin. Seokjin was an older vampire, deep black eyes aged and understanding, his smooth hand reaching through a beam of light to ask Yoongi to join him. Yoongi, with nothing left but his undying heart and a few trinkets, grabbed the elder’s hand and followed.

Seokjin, before his Change, was a French bachelor of a distant royal bloodline. He told Yoongi stories of the rich wonders of France, of dinners in the most elegant of houses, of the deepest roots of French history he could remember. Yoongi drank it all in and more, begging for details and information, begging for the knowledge the older vampire held within him. Yoongi was only about two hundred years old and it had taken him thus long to learn to control himself around human blood on his own pure will. Yoongi needed Seokjin.

Seokjin gave Yoongi a room in the apartment complex he owned and told him to keep to himself. Yoongi kept to himself for years, turning his British accent into an American one and making use of himself by killing the rats that loitered the old building. Seokjin provided for him until he finally fabricated enough papers to make Yoongi an official US citizen and give him a spot at a prestigious university.

Yoongi didn’t see the point in school, but because he was putting Seokjin into debt because of it, he went anyways. It was boring, and three years of these monotonous classes passed Yoongi quickly. They were nothing compared to the time he had spent as a beggar in the streets of Great Britain. He didn’t think anything of college until he met you, a young and eager freshman, lured to a bar by a few of the people you had called friends.

In your drunken frenzy, you had bumped into Yoongi and spilled your drink over his shirt. He didn’t have the energy to be angry, but you insisted on cleaning him. You pulled him to a dark, isolated corner and pressed your handkerchief to his chest, apologizing profusely.

But Yoongi could barely feel or see past your scent. It wrapped around his head and squeezed like a snake, making him feel light headed and intoxicated. He had been around the most putrid and most alluring smelling humans before, but this was new. This was something he’d never experienced or heard of. Seokjin never told him a human could make him feel this way. Without thinking, he cupped your chin and forced your head up to took at him.

You gulped. “I’m sorry?”

He said nothing, just stared at you with wide, crimson eyes. You couldn’t see as they shifted colors in the dim lights, but his cold skin made you want to run away but hold him closer in the same moment. “I want to kiss you.” He wondered aloud, completely enchanted by your radiating charisma.

“Then why don’t you?” You dared eagerly, alcohol on your tongue making you bolder than any other day.

In that moment, Yoongi wanted to ruin you. He wanted to corrupt you and steal your youth away as his had been. He wanted to grab you by the curve of your neck and let his fangs do the work. He wanted to marry you and watch you grow old. But he didn’t want to lose you, he knew even then that you would be his.

Your wide, twinkling eyes glanced over his face—you wanted to know what he was thinking. But he seemed lost, he seemed to be drowning in the ocean of his mind and so you grabbed the nape of his neck and pulled him into you eagerly. You sank your teeth into his bottom lip and he immediately grabbed your hips and pulled you closer. A drunkard nearby was whooping and hollering, clapping and cheering the two of you on as you tried to pull him into yourself and lock him away.

Maybe, it was the alcohol, maybe, it was something you couldn’t quite name, something like—dare you say it—fate? He was your medicine and you needed him more than anything else.

He took you home but would do nothing more than put you to sleep, caressing the inside of your thigh, as if he wanted to go further but had to hold himself back. You didn’t mind, you were too drunk to have remembered anything more.

When you woke up, he was across the room, humming and singing a song in a language you couldn’t understand, spinning around the kitchen as he made breakfast. His apartment was spacious, and each room led openly into the next. A barrier kept you hidden in the bedroom from the rest of the home.

“What are you doing?” You giggled, hiding yourself half nakedly behind the barrier, only your head peaking out.

Yoongi twisted on his heel and hummed and snapped to the song playing in his head, his pan haphazardly swinging in the air. You laughed and watched him, looking so happy as the morning sunlight seeped through every window of the apartment. “Why don’t you sit down?” Yoongi asked as his serenade came to a close and he dished the food onto two plates.

“I don’t know where my clothes are.” You whispered, a sharp smile on your face.

He nodded in understanding, “They’re in the wash downstairs. Grab any of mine.”

You hummed an okay and turned back to the bedroom, crossing your arms over your chest. Your brassiere was nowhere to be found, but you were thankfully still in your panties. Without giving it much thought, you strode over to the dresser and picked out a clean shirt. You buttoned it a few times and then skipped out from behind the barrier.

“What are we eating?”

Yoongi slid into a seat beside you and grinned, pushing a plate across the table. “Toast, eggs, bacon, cereal, orange juice I didn’t know what you’d like.”

“Well, you’re in luck. I love breakfast food.”

You picked up your fork and began eating. About halfway in, you noticed that Yoongi wasn’t eating and looked up to ask him why only to find him staring directly at you. His eyes were a pure red and you were taken aback. “Oh my—”

“What?” Yoongi blinked and the red was gone, as if by magic, like it had never been there at all.

You shook your head, trying to dismiss it as if you were hungover or still tired. “Nothing.” You ate a few more bites of food but your appetite had seemed to surpass you. You couldn’t shake those crimson eyes from your head. “What color are your eyes?”

Yoongi chuckled, “Brown, of course. Why do you ask?”

Inside, Yoongi’s stomach jumped, but Seokjin had taught him enough to keep calm in a situation like this.

“Never mind, I must be going crazy.” You ruffled your hair and pushed the plate of food away, you were no longer hungry.  You’re not crazy.” Yoongi smiled and you leaned on your elbow, melting under his effulgent gaze. You felt like you had known him, but you’d never met him before—hadn’t even passed him by at university.

“I just—I just thought your eyes were red for a moment there—but it’s nothing I’m just tired.”

Yoongi leaned across the table and rubbed your back as you put your hands over your face. “It’s okay, it was just a momentary lapse of judgement. That’s all.”

You don’t know how or when, but you moved in with Yoongi. Somewhere between him graduating from university and you telling your strict parents about him, you decided it would be best for the prosperity of your relationship if you shared the apartment. You barely had more than two boxes to bring to Yoongi’s as you had already been leaving your things there for months.

The move felt natural and comfortable. After that awkward morning, you went out a few times and declared yourself a couple. Yoongi was completely in love with you, but he still didn’t want to make love to you. He kept saying it was because his mother had raised him not to before marriage, but he never seemed like that type of man. You didn’t mind, he had other ways of pleasuring you in the bedroom anyways—and he was more than exceptional at it.

You’d been together a year and a half before you realized that you’d never celebrated Yoongi’s birthday. You were mad at him for never telling you when it was, but then you realized that you had never asked.

That night, Yoongi came home from work with a frown and you made your way across the living room to pull him close—work had been hard those last few weeks and it was starting to show under his eyes and between his brow.

Yoongi made a hum of content when you wrapped your arms around him and he curled his own around your shoulders, pulling you deeper into the hug. His breath tickled your scalp and he smelled like that expensive cologne you saved up to buy him your first Christmas together.

“I don’t usually like hugs because it wrinkles my suits,” Yoongi chuckled, his voice resonating between your bodies, “but you feel so much better against me like this.”

“Oh, shut up,” you mumbled, closing your eyes and accepting every inch of him in.

You never wanted to let him go but you were quickly reminded of the reason you approached him. You pulled away from him and held him at arm’s length with an inquiring smile. “When is your birthday?”

Yoongi blinked a few times. “I don’t have one.”

He said this as if it was something normal you felt odd after he mentioned it so calmly. You felt slightly let down, because now you couldn’t tell if he was being serious or was trying really hard to keep it from you. “Why won’t you tell me?”

“I don’t have one, I’m not sure what else to tell you.”

“Didn’t you celebrate your birthday with your parents when you were younger?” Yoongi pulled away from you and set his briefcase down on the table, pushing his hair back off his forehead.

He shrugged in that dismissive way you’d come to loathe. “I can’t remember.”

“Oh, everyone remembers their childhood.” You pressed lightheartedly, standing beside him, trying to capture his full attention. He seemed lost somewhere in his thoughts.

Yoongi stopped moving suddenly, like you had said something you shouldn’t have. “Not everyone.”

“What do you mean? Yoongi, what are you talking about?” The conversation seemed to have drifted off into the dark past Yoongi never brought up, one you’d never had the courage to ask about. Everyone is entitled to their secrets, it doesn’t keep you from completely loving Yoongi as his past has made him the man he is.

“We should go to bed.” Yoongi suggested, turning to you. His stare captured yours and in his beautiful brown eyes twinkled a baleful crimson.

You stepped back. “Oh my god.”

“What? What did I do?” Yoongi reached out for you but you stumbled backwards again, your hands covering your lips.

But now he stared at you softly and the crimson was gone. You felt like you’d gone mad. “Yoongi, there’s something wrong.”

“What is it? What is it, darling?” He grabbed your hand and brought it to his lips, peppering soft kissed along your knuckles. His skin was freezing cold—and it was blistering outside.

“I think—” you hiccupped and clasped your other hand over his. “I think I’m seeing things.”

He shook his head, “Honey, no. You’re not seeing anything, you’re just riled up. A momentary lapse of judgement.”

With those words, that first morning together rushed back to you and you could once again his crimson eyes. “No, no, no, no, no.” You covered your face with your hands. “It’s there again.”

“What’s there? Darling, you have to tell me what’s going on so I can help.”

Yoongi had his arms around you but you didn’t feel the same, he was differen.t He felt like the cold shell of a dead body, rotting away under pounds of dirt and grime. “Your eyes—they’re red.”

It had been so long since Yoongi allowed himself to show this other side of him—the side he wished didn’t exist but has given him you in return for his death. “Darling,” a knot formed in the back of Yoongi’s throat. He was sick of lying to you—his innocent lover—who wanted nothing more than to be with him. “I have something to tell you.”

Your heart pounded against his chest and for once Yoongi felt as if he was alive, like adrenaline was pushing through his veins as it once had.

“Let me show you.”

Yoongi leaned down and cupped your chin, looking deep in your eyes as if he was going to kiss you but as your eyes were fluttering closed Yoongi tilts your neck and sinks his teeth into your flesh. In the first second, you thought he might be joking and trying to give you a hickey, but then the shark pain of his teeth breaking through made you cry out.

Tears brimmed in your eyes and Yoongi pulled you by the small of your back even closer. You tilted your head back further and whimpered under him, digging your nails into his shoulders. But you never told him to stop.

The feeling of your blood being drawn out made you feel high, it brought you closer to a second plane of existence you didn’t know you could reach. The edges of your vision turned black and hazy, but you held onto Yoongi and allowed yourself to let go. Somewhere, you knew that he had the power to kill you, but something stronger knew he wouldn’t.

When he pulled away, you couldn’t feel the tips of your fingers or your feet, but you smiled at him. A droplet of your blood stained the edges of his lips and his tongue quickly swiped out to catch it.

His hand gripped yours tightly.

“I want to know more.”

⇢ next. 

⇢ playlist coming soon!

note: i wrote this in pretty much a day so i’m sorry if the editing isn’t the best. hopefully i will be updating this soon. also, just a heads up, the chapters are also not in a chronological order. 

Thank you for reading! Find more from me, July, here. 

[chogisad]

A Prayer For the Storm, a Shot of Vodka For the Fire | PT. 1

SUMMARY: The night the tank room collapses, everything changes. Some are searching for forgiveness, and some are searching for each other.

GENRE: Angst. POWERS AU. (WARNING: Brief mention of character deaths.)

Length: 3K.

TRAILER HERE

------ PART ONE  ------

Monday

Maracaibo is quiet for a Monday afternoon. The lights around the town begin to spring to life and Jongdae tells himself to enjoy the tranquility while it lasts. When summer starts, the streets will line with tourists and researchers, all hoping to experience Lake Maracaibo's "eternal storm."

On some days, Jongdae can see the lightning from his apartment's balcony. Its been months but every time, he becomes transfixed by the luminescent rays. They envelop the sky, over and over again, and on the bad days, when his own powers flare inside of him like thunder in the dead of night, they also help hide the way he loses control. On the bad days, when the electricity bursts out of him, Jongdae wishes he could be like Maracaibo; a sight to behold rather than terror and tragedy.

He walks the aging streets of his make-shift home. He's grateful for the Venezuelan color that helps him repress memories of ashen training rooms and botched simulations, of fires and flying, of telling Minseok to go on without him. It's all different here. It's quieter, so much that on the good days, Jongdae pretends he's safe. On the good days, Jongdae enjoys the persistent heat of Venezuela and forgets about how much he loved the frost of winter, and how beautiful Minseok looked with snow in his hair.

He finds a seat at one of the local bars and keeps his eyes down as he orders his drink.

"Quien estas tratando de olvidar?"

Jongdae stiffens at the sudden question, his heart clenching in cold fear. The glass is frozen midair as he gets caught under the gaze of the timeworn bartender, and Jongdae's vision blurs with panic.

"Estas tomando a las 7 de la tarde. Qual chica te daño?"

Jongdae almost cries with relief. The old man is simply making conversation, asking about the possible flame that broke his heart, rather than the stormy past he ran fast and far from. He smiles, hoping the other man did not register his overt alarm.

"La chica es la vida. Ya sabe como es," Jongdae replies, hoping he didn't trip over his gender pronouns too badly. The bartender nods solemnly but gives him an encouraging smile before placing another glass of whiskey in front of him.

"A la vida, mi chavo. Que un día nos sepa amar."

Jongdae drinks to that-- "to life, who may one day learn to love us."

Tuesday

Sehun checks his rearview mirror once, twice, three times in the course of five minutes. He takes a detour home, a different one every night, and parks down the street instead of in front of his building.

He takes the stairs instead of the lift. He checks to make sure the thin, unnoticeable ribbon is still in the door before he opens it. This is how he survives.

He only turns one light on at a time. The wooden floors of his flat creak under his weight; he likes it this way. Every step reminds him that he's still standing.

Sehun makes tea--three sugars-- and two slices of toast. He wanders alone in the darkness of his apartment until he reaches the right room. There's only a chair and a desk and the walls are papered with newspaper clippings and red marks, each pin pointing someone Sehun is trying to find.

He opens his laptop and stays illuminated in the fluorescent light of the screen.

"EUROPE - frost." He types into the search bar.

"NORTH AMERICA - floods."

"NORTH AMERICA - fires."

"ASIA - lightning."

Sehun takes notes in a worn journal. It's the eclectic collection of sketched dates and throwaway coordinates. Most of them are useless; only a few of them give him hope that one day he'll find his family.

Sehun showers and sits in the empty ringing of his living room. There's no furniture, only a blanket and a sheetless pillow. He tucks his knees under his chin and stares out the only window he left without a curtain. The blue haze from the city around him filters through the open blinds, and Sehun remembers nights they'd sit together in the dark, after a successful training session, and contain their powers to the palms of their hands.

Sehun loved the way lightning would dance across Jongdae's fingers. He remembers when they were younger, Jongdae would touch one of them and they'd all laugh as Minseok's or Yixing's or Jongin's long hair would stand on end.

Baekhyun knew how much they all hated the dark. He'd illuminate their dorm with orbs of light that'd twinkle brighter every time he laughed. Sehun remembers how Chanyeol would keep the room warm, and Baekhyun would keep it vibrant.

As they grew older and their powers strengthened, became more volatile, they became more weary of their abilities. After the fire, Jongdae stopped touching people. Minseok stopped making snowflakes. And Chanyeol was sent to sleep in his own room. After that, Baekhyun could never hold the light for very long outside of training rooms. The orbs would illuminate the space for a few minutes, but then they'd flicker and die out. They all grew accustomed to the darkness like that.

Before going to sleep, he fills a glass with water, and leaves it next to his makeshift bed, just like Junmyeon used to do. Sehun lays down on the hard floor. He tucks a tired arm under a tired head and tries to hold on to the memory of Junmyeon singing him to sleep. Sehun is afraid of all the people hunting him down. He's afraid of the things he's done, of everything he could still do. But despite the tragedy in his wake, Sehun is terrified he'll never find the people who learned to love a tempest storm.

Wednesday

Minseok often only remembers running. He remembers the tank room collapsing. He remembers the way pine needles raked at his skin and how he could count the sharp rocks embedding themselves further into his bare feet. The earth trembled underneath them; somewhere, Kyungsoo was determined to die before they took any of them again. He remembers tugging on Baekhyun so forcefully, remembers how the wind howled in his ears louder and louder as Sehun panicked someplace else in the forest.

Minseok comes home with groceries that night. Baekhyun is asleep on the couch and Minseok can't help but tuck the worn blanket tighter around the younger boy's shoulders. Baekhyun can't seem to ever get warm enough. He shivers on sunny days, and Minseok always feels like he isn't doing enough. He knows before, Baekhyun always had someone as warm as fire to go back to.

He tries to measure his steps as he makes dinner but Baekhyun wakes up eventually. He's ruffled hair and blanket around the shoulders and Minseok's heart softens. He makes Baekhyun tea and tells him about his day, about the new drink he tried at the coffee shop, about the little old lady he helped across the street. He keeps talking, forcing himself to fill the empty spaces Minseok created when he ran through the woods and away from the sounds of rushing water, away from the echoes of thunder.

He steps away from the stove, stops to take a breath, and meets Baekhyun's nervous smile. Before he can say anything else, Baekhyun's voice cuts across the kitchen counter; shaky but determined.

"There was another dust storm in Edinburgh." Baekhyun says, and Minseok's jaw clenches.

"Another earthquake in Colorado. And people are--"

"People are what, Baekhyun?" Minseok interjects, feeling the clench of his heart, knowing he always has to play the villain in these conversations. "Seeing a disappearing man in London? Another fire in Arizona? I don't know what you want me to--"

"I want you to help me fi--"

"Baekhyun, please--"

"These aren't coincidences! Minseok--"

"Look-- we just cant--"

"They could be waiting for--"

"There's other natural disasters out there besides us, Baekhyun!" Minseok snaps, too loud, too harsh, regretting it as soon as Baekhyun flinches and goes quiet.

"I need you to let me mourn them," Minseok mutters. He turns off the stove and retreats into the silence of his bedroom. He lays in the dark, his stomach twisting with guilt, and he falls asleep as the tears begin to dry on his pillow.

Hours later, he jolts awake to the first crack of thunder.

It sends him spiraling. He fists the bed sheets as his mind flickers through memories and he becomes entrapped to his own recollections.

Brown eyes and easy smile.

"Hi-- I'm Jongdae."

Static.

"I'm sorry."

Static.

"I can't always control it."

Static.

"Min, are we gonna die here?"

Static.

Junmyeon couldn't control the water and Luhan was drowning; they were all drowning. A gentle hand in his, shocking life back into his fading heart. The walls of the tank trembling.

''JONGDAE! JONGDAE!"

"GO! TAKE BAEKHYUN AND GO!"

"It's okay. It's okay. It'll pass." Baekhyun's gentle voice soothes him back to the present. Minseok clutches Baekhyun's hand under the covers, and squeezes his eyes shut as the entire room blazes with the first bolt of lightning. These storms always trigger memories Minseok tries to let go of; they trigger his remorse, calling for penitence. Its unspoken, the way Baekhyun finds his way into Minseok's room to ease him out of his nightmares. This is not the first storm they've weathered together, and Minseok knows it is not the last.

Thursday

Yixing knows he shouldn't but he can't help it. He can feel the small child hurting. He can feel the pain, sharp and hot, radiating off of his skin as his energy wanes out. Its like watching a camp fire die down; this small boy is nothing but smoke and embers, and Yixing knows he's not going to make it.

Yixing knows his parents are in the lobby, praying, unaware that their child is on the brink of nothingness, fate sealed long before they brought him into the emergency room. He knows he shouldn't draw more attention to himself but the boy, with his short hair and lanky figure, reminds him of another boy, who couldn't always time his landing and had the record for most broken bones amongst them.

Yixing remembers the night the proctors forced Yifan to fly higher, forced all of them to watch. Sehun was barely four, and shaking with fear, his own powers agitating the sky until Yifan fell. None of them reacted in time and in his nightmares, Yixing can sometimes hear the shattering bones he was not strong enough to heal.

He places gentle fingers over the boy's cold hand and focuses. He was not able to save Yifan, but maybe he can save someone else instead. The room hums suddenly with warm energy, and Yixing can feel the young boy absorb his power, can feel his heart strengthening, can see the color returning to his skin. The boy takes in a gulping breath of air, and the monitors around him being to keep loudly. Yixing leaves the room quietly. Like on so many occasions, he makes his way to the camera room and erases the tapes from that room, on that day. The people of this hospital will accredit another miracle to God, and Yixing will sleep with a sounder conscience.

Friday

Junmyeon finds it ironic that the darkness feels like drowning. It sits heavy on his heart, reminding him of everything he's lost.

Once upon a time, he was rather good at isolation.  He was born in the institute. He had no family to be ripped away from. He jumped when they said jump, he ate when they decided he'd earned it, and he spent his first few years of life thinking the world was made up of their commands and his submission.

Sehun and the others changed that. The institute wanted them to be weapons; they tried to teach them to kill and maim, but in their hearts, they taught themselves otherwise. The deaths they encountered were always accidents, always the consequence to losing control. They never blamed each other. But whether it was the smoke, or the fall, or the tank, someone always felt at fault. Someone would always carry a single name on their conscience.

Junmyeon thinks of this, of his family, as he suspends two tons of water in the air. He remembers the tank room, the way the walls stood like gravestones, and the way he could not get them out. With a flick of his wrist, the water propels as a jet into the wall of the empty pool, cracking the concrete. He does it again, stepping back as giant shards of rubble twist through the air. If only he could've been strong enough to save Luhan.

He fills the pool and walks on water. This too is ironic. The Professor once told him he and the others would be like gods amongst men. Junmyeon knows these gods are vengeful, and one day, the people who hurt him will pay for their sins.

Saturday

"Energy cannot be created or destroyed; that is the basic law of the universe." The physics professor instructs from the front of the lecture hall. Jongin writes down information from the powerpoint. He takes careful notes despite knowing that the universe sometimes has loopholes; he's proof of that.

The lecture ends and the stooped hall begins to empty.  Jongin gathers his belongings and makes his way to the courtyard. He pulls his peacoat tighter around himself as the frosty England air stirs the leaves, and his eyes wander over the Oxford cobblestones; all mismatched, all placed around each other to create something coherent.

"Hey," Kyungsoo brings him out of his reverie. He holds a paper cup out to him, and Jongin scrunches his nose.

"I don't drink--"

"I know," Kyungsoo sighs. "Its peppermint tea."

Jongin smiles, adding a little bow of gratitude. He makes space for Kyungsoo on the wooden bench, and they sip their drinks in the silence. They watch other students pass them by; Jongin feels out of place amongst people who are so paradoxically ordinary.

"How was your lesson?" He asks Kyungsoo, who takes a comtimplary drink before answering.

"The professor read medieval lit again. It was interesting." Kyungsoo shrugs. "Yours?"

"She talked about the laws of the universe; said matter can't be created. I thought about Jun and Minseok. They created a type of matter, right?"

Kyungsoo looks at the sky. He avoids Jongin's questioning gaze.

"Logic doesn't really apply to us. I think we'd be considered anomalies."

Jongin only nods.

"Lets go home," Kyungsoo says and they make their way to the main street in a pensative quiet. They take a cab home; Kyungsoo never teleports with Kai. They both know it reminds him too much of the last time it happened.

The night the tank room collapsed, Jongin made one choice to change everything. The others laid around him, sputtering, trying to swallow down as much air as humanly possible when the alarms started blaring.

"The-- the fence! Jongdae! Short circuit the fence!" Minseok yelled, helping a shaking Junmyeon to his feet.

They'd all looked, panicked, at the fence that was on the verge of collapse but still humming with electricity. They'd talked about escaping. They'd all fantasized about living different lives where their gifts were not weapons. Each of them had dreamt a version of life where they could be normal, and this was their one chance.

The forest around them was illuminated by Jongdae's lightning but Jongin's gaze was focused on Luhan. His eyes were closed, his wet hair matted on his forehead, as he lay amongst the rubble; dead.

"They're coming! RUN!" Junmyeon ordered, and Chanyeol was the first to turn his power against the men clad in white security gear. The trees came toppling down, giant flares of fire consuming their old trunks, and the entire forest became a war zone.

The wind howled, loud, angry and frightened, and slabs of steel flew through the air with it. Jongin could see his breath as razor sharp icicles cut through their surroundings, embedding themselves in the guards firing their weapons.

Jongin was immobile, his ears ringing with white noise as the entire world shook.

Yifan. Luhan. Tao.

He couldn't fathom watching someone else he loved die. Not like this. Not again.

"JONGDAE! JONGDAE!"

"GO! TAKE BAEKHYUN AND GO!"

The earth trembled beneath him. Someone screamed in pain. The air was cloying with dirt and dust and the smell of sulfur.

"SEHUN! WE'LL FIND YOU. GO." Junmyeon ordered and Jongin was choking on his desperation, useless as the legions of men clad in white came closer and closer.

Not again.

Jongin made his choice. He prayed they would forgive him. He prayed one day he'd get the chance to apologize.

Jongin reached out and placed his hand firm on Kyungsoo's shoulder. The universe went black and dry and Jongin felt a familiar compression on his lungs before their feet were touching solid concrete.

"YIXI-" Kyungsoo's shout died in his throat. He whipped around, eyes wide and furious.

"WHAT DID YOU DO?" He snarled, rounding on Jongin.

"I'm sorry." He whispered, feeling the ground beneath him vibrate dangerously.

"TAKE US BACK. TAKE US BACK, NOW." Kyungsoo demanded, grabbing Jongin by the white collar of his uniform.

"I'm sorry." Jongin repeated, letting Kyungsoo shake him.

"HOW COULD YOU? HOW COULD YOU?" Kyungsoo screamed, and Jongin braced himself. He would take the brunt of Kyungsoo's fury, would take every angry hit, if it meant Kyungsoo was alive.

Instead, Kyungsoo fell to his knees. The sobs that raked through his entire body echoed down the empty street and Jongin only stood motionless. He prayed they would forgive him. He prayed one day Kyungsoo would forgive him.

Sunday

The room is black with smoke. Somewhere, someone is screaming for help but Chanyeol can't see anything, can't hear through the panic pulsing hot and red in his ears. The flames don't stop coming. They lick at his palms, set more of the world ablaze and he tries to close his fists but that only makes them stronger.

The curtains, the bed sheets-- everything around him is fire. He stumbles toward Baekhyun's bed, toward Jongin's bed; empty.

The dream shifts violently and Yixing is crouching next to Tao's body. Chanyeol wills himself to wake up; he's lived this too many times. Yixing concentrates and the room buzzes with a warm energy but as soon as it starts, it goes cold, like a graveyard, like a coffin, like wilted flowers in the middle of a winter freeze. The colors are draining fast from the world, turning sleep into nightmare. Yixing's voice echoes with familiarity, sometimes angry, sometimes disbelieving, sometimes full of so much grief Chanyeol wishes the fire were corporeal enough to scorch the memory away; "He's dead. It--it was the smoke..."

The real walls of his real life come into focus. Chanyeol tries to lie very still, but it feels like the shadows are crawling, unearthing a culpability he tried so hard to forget. He reaches over and turns on his bedside lamp; it's been two years and he isn't accustomed to darkness. He always had someone made out of pure light sleeping next to him. Chanyeol stares at the ceiling and wipes the sweat from his forehead. He ignores the taste of salt on his lips, the dry tear streaks on his cheeks.

"It wasn't your fault. We know you can't control it."

His movements are robotic, a monotonous whir of motion that barely get him through the day. Chanyeol never feels the cold of the tile floor, never even notices that the hot water stopped working in his shower weeks ago. He dresses in dry colors that never attract attention and makes his way to his small kitchen.

"Took you a while to wake up."

Chanyeol almost screams, his fists instantly sparking with orbs of flames as years of training kick into overdrive.

"Woah-- woah!" Sehun shoots up from the couch, his hands up in surrender. "Its just me!"

The air in Chanyeol's apartment stales and he drops to his knees, shaking his head in disbelief. The flames are extinguished. He's imagining this. He must be imagining this.

"Hyung?" Sehun whispers, frightened, the excitement in his heart deflating more and more with each second.

"This isn't real. This isn't real." Chanyeol whimpers, digging his nails into his palms. He spent weeks imagining Tao after the fire, all sad smile and empty eyes. Tao would never say anything, never throw blame, he'd just observe Chanyeol's life from the shadows, not letting Chanyeol forget.

"Hyung-- Its just me." Sehun tries again. He steps forward, kneels in front of his friend, and places a trembling hand on Chanyeol's shoulder.

"I'm sorry it took me so long to find you." His voice is an unsteady murmur, heavy with the sudden realization that they were together, after two years, Sehun wasn't alone anymore.

"Sehun?" Chanyeol's voice is quieter than a gust of wind, afraid, already broken.

"Yeah, its m--oomph!" Chanyeol doesn't let him finish. He launches himself at the younger boy and squeezes him in his arms. Sehun holds Chanyeol tightly, buries his face in the crook of Chanyeol's neck and half giggles and half sobs; relieved, ecstatic, and terrified all at once.

They both cry into the embrace, hearts swelling with unimaginable hope as the seconds tick by. Chanyeol's mind is buzzing, and he holds fistfuls of Sehun's shirt in his hands, pulling him even closer. Chanyeol wonders if this is what it feels like to be saved from drowning.

"Hyung," Sehun pulls away. Chanyeol runs his eyes over every aspect of Sehun's features, trying to memorize him, never wanting to forget any detail of this single moment.

"How did you find me?" Chanyeol whispers and Sehun gives him a tear stained smile.

"Google." He answers, before he's helping Chanyeol back on his feet.

"Hyung, the others. I know where they are."

Chanyeol takes a deep breath, deeper than any he's been able to manage in the past few years.

"Together-- we'll find them together."

© Chogisad

MASTERLIST

[ultraviolettae]

Up and down

⇲ Pairing: Yoongi x reader

⇲ Summary: It´s a hot summer day on set and Yoongi can´t handle watching you lick a popsicle without wanting to fulfill his fantasies.

⇲ Word count: 4.326

⇲ Genre: Smut

⇲ Warnings: graphic smut.

⇲ Author´s note: This was on private but I´ve arranged it so that I can  repost it since I had to correct a few things.

It´s smutty and I´m not ashamed lol

You hadn´t planned this at all. You were supposed to be in your apartment, probably taking a nap or watching one of those movies that made you cry rivers even if you couldn´t relate to the character´s love life in any way possible. Yet when you had received a rushed and frantic call from your boss saying they needed you for today´s shoot, you had submitted to readjusting your plans and had driven all the way up to a forest in the middle of nowhere after cursing in three different languages. And now, there you were, almost whining at the lost of your day off.

On top of that, it was bloody hot. You squinted your eyes trying to block the sun as you made your way through the crowd, cameras already placed all over and staff members running across the set almost bumping into you and barely muttering an apology. There were various insects in the air that added up to the dry ambient and the fact that there wasn´t a single tree near enough to shelter under its shadow didn´t help at all. Your hands worked with a hair tie tying all the strands into a bun in an attempt to cool off and, slapping a mosquito that you had caught trying to suck your blood, a heavy sigh escaped your lips. Coming here - you could´ve rejected it, but it would only make you feel more miserable.

“Hey, you look pissed as fuck”

When you had agreed to come you hadn´t even thought about what exactly did they needed you for, but when you turned around to find Seokjin shyly smiling at you there wasn´t anything left to wonder. They wanted you to dance. Great.

“Having trouble with the choreography?”

You tried sounding as relaxed as possible. Above everything, you loved your job, no matter the circumstances. And as much as the day wasn´t going as you´d like to, Seokjin didn´t deserve your grumpiness, no less knowing how insecure he felt about his dancing skills.

“The other boys are busy having their pictures taken. I´m sorry they dragged you over here just to bare with my clumsiness”

One of your hands was placed on his shoulder and you gave him a reassuring smile. You´d sure prefer to be sprawled across your bed sipping on some kind of alcohol but, this was better for your health, you guessed. Besides, it wasn´t the first time something like this happened. Several times had you gotten your plans cancelled because the company needed some last second help.

“It´s no big deal. Let´s just find a spot where we won´t get burned by the sun and I´ll help you”

It turned out teaching the steps to Seokjin was quite fun. He had trouble with the body rolls and some of the footwork, but he knew how to laugh at himself when he made a mistake. He also had an easy way to make giggles escape your mouth, imitating the birds that were happily singing behind the branches or telling one of his dad jokes. He was about to finish one when someone appeared next to the pair of you.

“You still look like a spastic worm while dancing. Doesn´t he?”

You had been so caught up in your annoyance and in Seokjin that the thought of the other members hadn´t even crossed your mind. So, when you were met with Yoongi giving you an inquisitive look, you blinked twice. There was always something intimidating about his presence, no matter how many interactions there had been between the two of you already. The way his eyes were always dark, the slight poisonous tone of his voice, it all made it hard to be around him sometimes.

“Don´t be so harsh”

You sounded out of breath, but determined, and managed to look him in the eyes. Seokjin, for his own sake, decided to ignore Yoongi´s comment, which you were grateful for. The last thing you needed was to be included in a fight between these two, specially if you were on Jin´s side.

“Actually, Y/n´s help has done wonders. I´ll go get dressed, we´re starting in five minutes”

After thanking you one last time, he left both of you not knowing what to do as the uncomfortable silence was becoming unbearable. You were always unsure about how to act in front of him, his behavior always unpredictable. In all the years you had known the boys, he might be the one whom you had spent the less time with. The one that was less friendly, less open to establish conversation with you even when you were alone. Despite of that, you knew he didn´t dislike you. It was countless times that you had caught him staring at your body. That one time you bent over a desk to plug in your phone and you had caught a glimpse of his reflection in the mirror wall, his eyes glued to the rear of your ass. Or that day you wore a blouse with a bit of cleavage and had found yourself intensely blushing because of his persistent staring at your exposed skin. Each and every time a smirk on his face. You hated to admit that, even if he was just physically attracted to you, it made you feel some type of way.

But none of that mattered, of course.

He had never done anything that could make you push yourself into suppressing the crescent feelings you liked to think weren´t even there, neither had he done anything that could make you stop it. Either way, you tried not to think too much about it.

“I´ll go too. Will you be watching?”

The question caught you off guard. You fingered the bracelet around your wrist nervously, trying to find an excuse to avoid his eyes. Maybe his words were just casual, but he seemed to have an ulterior motive for them.

“Sure”

Despite the hot weather, a shiver went down your spine and you hoped he wasn´t seeing the way your cheeks were reddening.

“Good. I´ll be watching you, too”

His words pulled you out of your thoughts so rapidly your heart jumped against your chest. You could have sworn - you were sure this time - that there had been something predatory behind his words, something that you had never sensed before. As you watched him go to have his makeup retouched, you tried to brush it off. It sure had meant nothing.

Later on, you found yourself actually paying much more attention than you expected. You had seen the boys performing several times, but you had never seen them acting or behind a camera. It was quite the process, though, having to repeat the choreography numerous times until they all got it right at the same time. From the distance, you gave them some tips about how to get in sync, and you couldn´t say your eyes hadn´t drifted to Yoongi much more than they should have, your mind constantly pulled to thoughts of him. You hadn´t dared to look him in the eyes yet, but you had granted yourself a position in which you could see him up close. Letting yourself fantasize a bit, you observed the sunlight reflecting on the smooth skin of his collarbones, the mint locks of hair bouncing over his forehead. The others looked incredibly good as well, and you also directed short glances at them from time to time, admiring how graceful they all looked. And before you knew it, you were clapping along with everyone else and smiling at the thought of how good the result was going to be.

“Everyone! We´ve brought some ice cream!”

Your attention was quickly drowned to the cold treats that a manager was distributing, your mouth already watering at the sight. Taehyung approached you, holding two fruity popsicles that looked delicious.

“Here, Y/n. You´ve also worked hard”

You accepted it and a boxy grin appeared on his face, instantly lighting up yours as well. It was just ce cream, right?

“Oh, thanks”

You mumbled and nodded with a small smile, unwrapping the packaging. As you placed your tongue on the tip a smile appeared on your face. It was strawberry flavored, your favorite. When you were going to lick again, you noticed a pair of eyes boring into you. Yoongi.

You hadn´t taken what he had said seriously, until now. It was clear that he was watching you, some kind of desire written all over his eyes. You hugged yourself in discomfort, your arms pressed below your breasts unknowingly pushing them up. When his stare met them, when a smirk appeared on his face, it all made sense. He was getting turned on. Min Yoongi, out of all people you were surrounded by, was getting all riled up at the sight of you sucking on a popsicle. You decided to be brave for once. If he was going to stare, you might as well let him enjoy it.

The top part of your pink wet tongue met the ice again, flattening against it. You licked it once, twice without breaking eye contact. You continued doing that for a while, enjoying the taste as if you were eating it the traditional way. Then, you took as much of it as you could in your mouth to immediately take it out, slowly, your lips getting plumper because of the cold. All through it, staring at each other. Your mouth wrapped around the popsicle several times, your cheeks hollowing, swirling your tongue teasingly, all done at a slow pace. When the size of it had gone thinner, you concentrated on melting it, so that the liquid would spill down your fingers. After you had looked around enough times to see that no one was paying attention to the little interaction between the two of you, your fingers scooped some of the pink substance and you introduced them in your mouth, sucking it off with a gesture that clearly had a sexual nature. You stayed in that position for as long as you could, making the most out of it. And then, you removed them with a loud plop.

Whatever had gotten into you, you  liked it. It was fun to see him so stiff, his fists balled up and his lips parted in surprise. It was as if the thought of you being in control of Yoongi thrilled you, making you want more. You proudly smiled to yourself as you watched him finally move from his spot, his face as red as a tomato. After all, he kind of deserved it after all the times he had made you feel small under his hungry stare.

The events of the afternoon had completely extinguished your bad mood and you stretched your arms after having helped clean up the place. The sun was setting, there were only a few boxes left to put inside the vans and you were already fantasizing about arriving home to enjoy what was left of your day off when a member of the staff approached you.

“Y/n, have you brought your car?”

You gestured toward your black Volkswagen, nodding with your head and fearing where the conversation was going.

“Yeah, is anything wrong?”

He smiled at you as if he was already thanking you, even though he was aware of you not knowing what he wanted.

“We don´t have room in our cars for everyone, we´re missing one seat. Would you mind driving him home?”

That implied you arriving to your apartment later than expected and missing the first episode of your favorite drama, but, if you were in the situation, you´d like someone to do you the favor.

“Sure, and who will that person be?”

Before the staff member could say anything, someone appeared next to him and you didn´t need to look to know who it was.

“Me. That will be me”

Yoongi, again. His lips were curled up in a smirk and you wished you could smack it off his face. Suddenly you didn´t feel so good about the little display of pent up frustration you had made earlier, and blood crept to your cheeks. Why was it that as soon as he came close to you your whole body felt defenseless?

“Perfect! Then let´s get going”

You watchedthe staff member disappear and once again, you were left alone with Yoongi. Except that this time, you felt trapped under his stare, his black orbs not living your face.

Every single car left, the place now looking empty and showing its true nature without all the technological devices and human bodies that had been there just moments ago. All you wanted was to run away or climb up a tree, anything that meant not being in his presence. You were even tempted to run to your car and dump him right then and there so that the wolves could eat him in the middle of the night. But if that happened, they´ll probably sue you and you´d lose your job.

You inhaled deeply. You weren´t even making sense. It was just Yoongi. The fact that he had been able to get you turned on just because you had sucked off a piece of ice while looking at him didn´t mean anything.

“M-my car is over there”

He followed you, and his silence was only making you more uncomfortable. You wanted to fill it, but at the same time you were unable to articulate a single word.

By the time you had started the car, your hands were trembling. All the time you were driving he kept staring at you, even if the view behind his side window was breathtaking. You lowered your head avoiding a sun ray and your eyes met his momentarily before focusing on the road again.

“Can you stop looking at me? It´s making me nervous”

The words escaped your mouth before you could stop them and regret instantly swept over you. Even though you couldn´t directly see it, you knew he´s head was tilted to the side, that lopsided smile you hated so much plastered on his face.

“You didn´t seem so eager about it earlier”

An involuntary gasp left your mouth and your eyes widened. You hadn´t expected him to bring it up that way or being honest, to bring it up at all.

“What do you mean?”

Then, he placed a hand on your thigh, his slender fingers resting against your smooth skin as if that was the most natural thing to do. Your grip on the steering wheel tightened with strength you didn´t even knew you had in the first place. You regretted wearing a dress, you regretted what you had done earlier and you regretted that you secretly loved the way his hand brushed against your skin.

“Tell me” His voice had turned huskier that you were willing to admit and you tried to think about driving and nothing else “Do you think it´s alright to do that in front of me” The hand he had placed on your leg was moving up your thigh at a dangerous speed, now playing with the hem of your dress “and not expect a punishment?”

As much as you tried, there was nothing you could do to deny the heat that was growing in your core. You bit on your bottom lip. Focus on the road. Focus on the road.

The tip of his thumb met your lacy underwear and started massaging the spot. You reprimanded yourself for not having bought a car with seats five meter away from each other. Fuck. Those didn´t even exist.

“Y/n. Tell me if you want me to stop”

Hell no. The last thing you wanted was the warmth of his finger ,now brushing against your clothed clit, massaging it in slow circles, to leave you. You jumped in your seat, too startled by his touch and you had to suppress a tiny moan. As an incentive, you shook your head. You didn´t want him to stop. Not at all. This kind of situation would probably make you wake up tomorrow regretting life in general but, you were getting carried away. It was as if Yoongi had some kind of mind control over you. And the fac that he was asking for consent, it made your insides turn. Yoongi never worried about what you thought or, in that case, might want.

“Good girl. I´m sure that by now, you are aware of how much I want you”

You had to remind yourself how to breath, and this time you couldn´t control your whining. A moan left your lips, and he had done nothing but speed his movements against your now swollen bud. Yooongi, who gave you dirty looks all the time during dance practice when you corrected him, who always ignored you was suddenly teling you he wanted you. But, in which way?

“And by how wet you already are, I bet you want me to”

That was it. It was as if days, months of supressing your needs had been suddenly removed. You wanted him, right then and there. If he could make you feel that way only by rubbing your womanhood, fuck, you didn´t even want to imagine what having him inside you would feel like. Almost against your will, you parked the car literally in the middle of nowhere and you turned to face him. His hand was still buried between your folds, and you arched your back when a particularly strong stroke met your clit.

“Why are we stopping?”

You knew he knew the answer and you knew he wanted to hear it from your mouth. A wave of pleasure was sent through your core, and you tried to act composed and oblivious to it.

“Because” You tried not to moan again “If we are going to do this” He sped up his pace even more “I-I´d rather not die in a car accident while orgasming”

He let out a chuckle and his hand stopped moving. It was the first time you had made him laugh - that you knew about - and for a moment you regretted it had to be in an atmosphere like that.

“No problem, then. I can think of another million ways to punish you”

And before you knew it, your body moved automatically, awkwardly shifting between the seats and the numerous gadgets placed between them. As if he had been waiting for you, his hands immediately met your waist to help you accommodate on top of him, his hands hiking up your dress leaving your blue underwear exposed.

“If I knew you´d be this obedient, I would´ve done this way earlier”

Everything he said was a turn on. You liked his voice, the slightly seductive edge that had appeared only for you. His fingers dug into your ass, grabbing the flesh and cupping it roughly.

“I love your ass”

He almost moaned it, and you bucked your hips into his growing erection. The sudden compliment made your heart swell with pride, and you had to remind yourself that what he felt for you was pure sexual attraction.

“By all the times you had openly stared at it, it´s no surprise”

His eyes were darker than ever, his hands fidgeting with the fabric of the dress revealing more and more of your body while he was still fuly dressed.

“I wasn´t trying to be discrete”

You noticed his bulge pressed against you, and you rubbed your core against it. At this point, discrection was the last thing you needed.

“Don´t be”

The words seemed to have an impact on him, and he hungrily attacked your lips. He tasted good, making you want more even though you had just started. It took you a while to realize that it was the first time you were kissing him, his lips feeling as if they had been made specifically for you, as if you had already kissed before and you knew exactly what to do.

You separated to breathe and you spotted a protuberant vein on his neck, not hesitating a single second before burying your head in it and starting peppering kisses along his jaw line. You started rocking your hips against him, anxiously wanting to feel some type of release.

“Fuck. Keep doing that”

For once you were the one to smirk, the desperate tone of his voice activating something inside you. You wanted to kiss his neck again but, as you were about to place your lips on his skin, he pulled you back by your wrists.

“What’s wrong?”

Truly concerned about having done something unpleasant to him you furrowed your brows, but the amused expression on his face was telling you otherwise. He had something in mind.

“Ever heard of dry humping?”

You blinked, not expecting to hear that term at all. You had never thought about Yoongi being into that. Well, not that you had ever thought about Yoongi’s kinks.

“Yeah. Is that what you like?”

He lifted an eyebrow, a playful gesture that made him look oddly cute for the situation.

“Usually not” He found the zipper of your dress and he deliberately pulled it down along with the straps “But, it’s your punishment. I had to watch you sucking on that stupid popsicle” Your bra was now completely visible and he unclasped it without difficulty , your flesh meeting the fresh air. You didn’t complain, your eyes locked with his “Imagining it was my cock inside that pretty mouth of yours. You kept tempting me, and I couldn’t do anything. You got me so hard I thought my balls would explode”

One of his hands started massaging your breasts, the tips of his fingers pressing against your hardening nipples. His words only turned you on more, he didn’t have to swear he had been, and was, rock hard. You could feel it for yourself.

“Rub your pussy against me until you come”

Your mouth hanged open at his request and when you saw him place his arms on his sides, completely away from your body, you understood he was serious. You hesitated at first, but the way his eyes were roaming over your body encouraged you to do it. Your hips moved against the fabric of his pants, the friction causing you to get even more aroused. As you noticed his body relaxing under yours you sped up, alternating between thrusting and moving your hips in circles. His head fell backwards and he moaned, guttural grunts repeatedly delighting you ears. Your hand reached for your clit seeking for more pleasure, but once again, he stopped you.

“Play with your breasts instead”

At that point, you would’ve done anything he said. You cupped both your breasts as tight as you could, your hand reaching for your pussy wetting them with your juices only to spread them across you nipples. His dick twitched inside his pants, and you weren’t going to last much longer if you kept rubbing against it so hard. You kept repeating the same action, coating two or three fingers in your drenching core and rubbing the hot liquid all over your breasts while moaning loudly. Apparently, it turned him on beyond belief.

“Fuck Y/n. Now I want to come all over them”

His words were exactly what you needed to reach your orgasm, and you grabbed the sides of his jacket as your body convulsed, the pressure that had been built up in your lower stomach suddenly exploding. He obliged to touch you again, holding your waist to steady you between shaky breaths.

“That was fucking hot”

Your head rested against his shoulders, and you were not sure about what was going to happen next. You wanted him to touch you, to feel your body as he had done before, but all you got was his right hand lightly slapping your ass.

“You did great. But we’re not finished. You still owe me”

He signaled you to move back to the driver’s seat and you obeyed. Your legs were still trembling a bit because you just came, hard enough to make you feel dizzy.

“I don’t like the idea of your lips wrapped around something that isn’t my dick”

Even though you were aware about what you had just done and you yourself were naked, you blushed when he unzipped his pants, lowering them past his knees followed by his boxers. His erect member was now proudly standing in front of you, the tip redden and covered with precum. You could tell he wouldn´t be able to last much longer, and you wanted to help him. There was nothing preventing you from touching it.

“Go ahead. Suck me off”

You didn’t hesitate to spit on your hands before wrapping them around his length. He hissed, his thighs tightening and flexing at your touch. You gifted him a kitten lick before taking the whole thing in your mouth, your lips stretched to make sure you properly tasted his cock.

“Keep going like that and I´ll come soon”

He grabbed the hair on the top of your head and pulled you back, so that he could have a better view. In no moment did his eyes leave yours, as if he wanted to remember every single moment of him entering you for the first time. When you realized he was so worked up he had started doing his part of the job, your hands left his dick to rest on your thighs. He didn´t stop pushing inside of you until his tip met your throat, your voice muffled by him repeating the movement. You took every inch as best as you could, breathing through your nose, too caught up in the thought of you giving him pleasure to care about the pain. The only thing audible was the lewd sound of his skin hitting the back of your throat and some moans occasionally coming from him. His fingers dug harder into your scalp, making tears appear on the corner of your eyes that were going wider with every moment that passed, lust torturing them with each glance he directed at you.

“Fuck. I´m going to come…”

He suddenly pulled out of you and as he held his dick with one hand you saw him shoot his release, the hot liquid landing mainly on your breasts and some of it on your mouth. The sight turned you on even if you had just come.

Finally, he removed the cum from your lip, gently, and held it up for you to see.

“Open up”

Your mouth followed his command and you immediately swallowed, too fascinated by his bluntness. You watched him collapse against his seat as he put back his clothes and removed the sweat that had appeared on his forehead. With him fully dressed you suddenly felt too exposed and quickly reached for your clothes. Once you were back in your dress and you had brushed your fingers through your hair, you realized you didn´t know what to say. It was as if after both of you had fulfilled your fantasies about the other there was nothing left, nothing tangible to hold onto between the two of you. You should´ve had known that the fact that you had just had sex with Yoongi wouldn´t change anything, and it didn´t have to.Your lips were parted, your cheeks flushed, and your heart beating faster than usual. Yoongi had just given you the best orgasm ever, he had told you he wanted you...why did something feel so wrong then?

“That was great. I´ll take you home now”

If your smile had looked as forced as it had felt, he didn´t acknowledge it. Except for the reddened tone of his cheeks there was nothing that could hint that the two of you had just done something that intimate. The ride was short and silent, and he barely muttered a goodbye before exiting your car.

Back in the road, you wanted to hit yourself for being so stupid. He hadn´t even kissed you, or touched you the way you had dreamt about,  how it was supposed to be after you slept with someone. He hadn´t even thanked you. You sighed. It was just sex. Pure physical attraction. After today, Yoongi had made it clear: that was all he felt for you.

[pridejinmin]

illustrious  ↪ queenly (1)

summary: the seven princes were chosen. kim seokjin, prince of beauty, kim namjoon, prince of emotional destruction and art, min yoongi, prince of music, jung hoseok, prince of joy, park jimin, prince of the sea, kim taehyung, prince of family and home, and jeon jeongguk(or jungkook), prince of winter.

watch them fight for themselves, and for their people.

pairings: jinmin, taekook, yoonseok

warnings: no archive warnings apply to this chapter. later on; angst, blood, death, graphic depictions of violence, rape.

CROSSPOSTED ONTO AO3 - MY AO3 IS totorojin !

CROSSPOSTED ONTO WATTPAD - MY WATTPAD IS pridejinmin !

"what do you regret most in life, jimin?" seokjin turned to the patch of bright orange hair, as the light shone onto his jawline, up to his cheekbones.

"everything, mostly." jimin replied calmly, silently counting the stars in seokjin's eyes as he turned to face him. "the thing i regret most though, is not saying anything to the people i love and losing them without a warning sign." jimin wrapped his light blue jumper around his entire body as a light breeze hit his toned skin.

"that's why i try to prove how much you mean to me everyday, in little subtle ways, seokjin. i don't want to lose you like i did everyone else." jimin whispered the last sentence, and though the crickets of the night drowned him out, seokjin still heard the soft muffled voice.

and he smiled, he turned and smiled. "i won't leave though." seokjin left a ringing in his ears, a soft voice harmonizing in his ears.

"you can't promise me that." jimin whispered back, in a even smaller, and softer voice than before. "yes, i can't guarantee i'll always stay, until your last dying breath," seokjin paused for a moment. "but i'll try my best, only for you."

after a pure minute of water from the pond splashing, and crickets jumping around seokjin and jimin as if they were dancing, jimin responded with a smile. "thank you. i could never wish for anything more than that."

"you're welcome, prince of the sea." seokjin laughed. "shouldn't we be heading back into the castle? night has fallen, and it's quite chilly."

"yeah, i agree." jimin laughed and his teeth started to clamp together in a fast speed. "we'll return tomorrow."

jimin and seokjin slowly got up, and wiped some of the dirt off themselves. expect for the pond, there could've been heard soft foot steps on the grass of the duo. maybe even a few comments, jokes and light smacks. you never know.

jimin had gone inside, wanting to be out of the cold, while seokjin looked back to the glowing pond. "lights off."

"seokjin, are you coming?" jimin was heard from inside, making seokjin slightly jolt. "i'm coming. "

he stepped inside.

"boo!"

jimin had creeped up on him and scared jin out of his mind, as he let out a high pitched yelp.

jimin laughed, and found himself in seokjin's neck, his laughter vibrating through each end of seokjin's body. "i can't believe you fell for that!" jimin giggled and ruffled his own hair.

"yeah yeah," seokjin pulled on jimin's sweaterpaw. "let's go to sleep, nerd."

"okay." jimin smiled sweetly, and followed jin upstairs, with each step followed a light jump from the sudden burst of energy pumping through jimin's veins.

they came to a stop, diving two most arguably prettiest places in the whole palace. jimin turned to jin, smiling sweetly and catching a glimpse of seokjin's part, the flowers blooming and rivers and all the different seasons painted across the walls, slowly fading out in each other. seokjin caught a glimpse of jimin's part; the clear water of jimin's tanks illuminated onto the ground, his sharks and whales were sleeping. seokjin was quite scared to go over there, he was afraid of jimin's great white shark, he looked mean, to say the least.

"goodnight, seokjin." jimin whispered, and seokjin nodded, and smiled back. "good night, chim." he turned around, and seemingly faded away into the pink and light green.

jimin sighed, and ruffled his bright orange hair, the only warm colour in the mix of blues. he turned his heel and walked away.

the light blue jumper he wore was barely giving him any protection, not to mention the white shirt he had underneath. he shot a glance at the tank, jimin's replacement for normal walls, and looked down a little further to see comet, his shark, sleeping.

he opened his bedroom door, being welcome by more friendly and cuter fish. he didn't even kick his shoes off when he jumped into bed, the sheets making his landing softer.

he sighed, looking up to the water. "i love him." he admitted silently, to no one but himself.

he couldn't sleep that night, only looking up at the ceiling tank, at the water. it made his head roam with thoughts, from "it's been what it feels like years since seokjin and i become princes, though it's only been a year and a half, yet i still feel the same. does he feel the same?" to "i want to cuddle with seokjin, i'm tired." bags under his eyes began to shape with each minute passing, and at 3am, his eyes fluttered shut; leading him to the sleep he prayed for.

the sleep he prayed for turned from black, to white, as jimin woke up with different clothes and hair, and heard a faint voice singing to him.

the white light started to cluster, cluster and fuse together, it formed a hurricane. suddenly jimin couldn't breathe as the hurricane swept him off the white ground.

he closed his eyes and accepted his faith, as he started to choke back flowers from his mouth. two, three, four, five petals started to fall from his mouth. the darkness behind jimin's eyes was violent as it turned white and petals were falling. he couldn't move and didn't know what to do.

"jimin!" taehyung called out, tapping his foot impatiently as the sweet scent of breakfast flowed through the dining room.

"i swear to god i am going to kill that kid--" yoongi threatened as he stood up, grumbling. sure, jimin may be like family to him, but food is better than people.

"now, now, yoongi!" seokjin grabbed yoongi's sleeve and sat him down and he nervously laughed. "i'll go get jimin. i'll be back in 5 minutes!"

seokjin got up and nervously speed to the second floor, passing by yoongi's part and hoseok's part, namjoon's part and taehyung's part is located downstairs. seokjin thinks taehyung is off to find jungkook as well, since he's the closest with him and the most willing to dress up with 1000 jackets just to find kook. when seokjin got to the place where jimin's and his part cut off, his normal instinct was to go towards the light pink, but he turned around instead and jogged through the hallway.

the water was pretty and clear, and there was some coral as well. the only thing that was intimating jin was the fact that jimin's shark was following him, looking down on him since the shark probably didn't see jimin all day either; he's most likely worried. that doesn't make seokjin any less scared though.

he finally found the grey door that marked jimin's bedroom, and slowly opened it. the sight of jimin slightly horrified seokjin. usually, when jimin was sleeping in, his sheets would still be somewhat neat and he would sleep peacefully on his back, mouth just a bit open.

but instead, his pillows and sheets were thrown everywhere and jimin was sleeping away from seokjin. after a moment of shock, seokjin rushed to jimin's side, sitting just beside the sleeping boy. "jimin..?" seokjin said with a hint of nervousness, and shook him lightly. "jimin, please."

"wake up!" seokjin said a little more loudly, to awake the sleeping beauty. he noticed how jimin was sweating, and his facial expression wasn't calm at all. it was a face of distress; eyebrows furrowed, lips trembling. "jimin!"

he awoke with a flinch and a pant.

"jin.." jimin was holding his chest, as if he was choking back something, but nothing came down from his lips. he was trying to steady his breathing on his own, but with no avail since he kept on hyperventilating.

"jimin, look at me." he looked up with heavy eyes. "count to 10, i'm here. breathe."

after a minute or so of light hand holding and comforting, the room fell silent. "it's been ages since you've had a nightmare that bad." seokjin frowned.

"it's okay. let's just go to breakfast. i'm fine." jimin lied and stood up, face swollen. he pulled seokjin by the end of his pyjama sleeve and started to jog a bit downstairs as they both heard frustrated yells from the dining room.

jimin quickly leaned onto the railing and sled down, while seokjin just jumped down every third step. jimin ran to his usual seat, and sat down in a hurry, seokjin right behind him.

"sorry to keep you waiting." jimin shyly apologized, and he turned to yoongi. "especially you, yoongi hyung."

"i'll accept your apology this time; but the next time you're late to breakfast, I will drag your ass down here, not seokjin." yoongi threatened with a chuckle as the whole table shook in laughter.

"yes, i know. " jimin replied with the same tone of chuckle. as they calmed down, they began to dig in. from the last couple of years of living together, being best friends, and in general slowly but surely becoming family, their attitude has changed quite a bit.

especially jimin and jungkook; jimin was shy to go up to seokjin, even when they both sat down at the pond and went to the exact same spots in the forests, or when yoongi would jokingly threaten jimin, jimin would start to panic and apologize, even though he had no reason to. jungkook would stay quiet most of the time, and only be in his icy climate with the temperature so cold the walls started to become ice. he would even ignore taehyung following him around, trying to be his friend.

taehyung? he hadn't change one bit. since day one he was the social butterfly, he became instant friends with everyone, but he had just not befriended jungkook. he started to follow him around, and jungkook had tried every trick in the book to shake taehyung off but to no avail. taehyung is stubborn, especially when it comes to friends.

at the start, yoongi was very grumpy. he didn't want to become a prince, he didn't have the right to choose. so he would lock himself up with his paintings of beethoven and bach, and play piano. he started to loosen up once he started to open up to all of the princes individually, all with their own story and experience.

namjoon would stay oddly quiet. everyone would question him, and try to break him out of his deadly silent shell, but to no avail. seokjin was namjoon's childhood friend, so he had told them; "namjoon has a particularly tragic past. he was a nerd and wasn't loved much by other students, so they started to mock him. the mocking got to him emotionally and made him go silent. he wouldn't say a word, not even to his parents, not even in his home; where he was suppose to feel safe and loved. he came from a poor family, he was moving constantly, to smaller and smaller apartments and his parents had to get more and more jobs. though he didn't say a word, it made him exhausted. he started to lock himself up in his room, and that's when he started to draw, and it became a passion. that's why he's so quiet; when he warms up to you, believe me he'll be the exact opposite of quiet."

and after a while, he did warm up to the people around him, and became almost like a leader, keeping every prince in check.

hoseok was like taehyung, though. he was always happy and cheery, despite his tragic past. as a kid, he wasn't loved either. he tried to make his mom proud, but she didn't really care and underestimated how much he was trying. because of the pent up frustration and pressure he put on himself, he was always angry. his sister told him to get help, but he refused, at first.

if you would ask jimin about his childhood, he would only respond with "cottage, and lake". he lived in a cottage, one right besides a lake he would never forget. in the lake, that's were he found his love for fish and water, and that's where he learned how to swim. even at the age of 9, he dyed his hair bright orange. some kids teased him and called him names like "aqua man" and "fish boy", he didn't mind. he quite liked it, being appreciated (in an odd way) for the thing you would die for.

seokjin, though, had probably the most tooth rottingly sweet childhood.

poor momma and papa kim; since seokjin as a child was full of energy. he was either running around in the upstairs apartment, helping his dad out with his bakery, or out and about with his bicycle. not even mention when he got his puppy, jjanggu, since as a puppy, jjanggu could keep up with seokjin's energy. since he was a small dog, he could easily fit in seokjin's bicycle's basket. he would always ride him around, having fun just by himself.

"today is a free day. do whatever you want; you've done a lot of work this week, take some time to yourself!" namjoon announced with a smile, as everyone clapped and cheered.

"ah good, i was wondering if i would have to do even more work today." jungkook joked. "tae, c'mon!" jungkook turned and smiled to his best friend, and he nodded. they dashed from the dining table, ready for a new adventure, side by side.

"for once in my life, i guess i'll hang out with hobi." yoongi smiled and got up to find hoseok, as he ran off the second every last bit of his food disappeared from his plate.

"i'll be out in the forest, i was too busy this week that i haven't drawn at all." namjoon informed both jimin and seokjin. they both nodded and smiled.

"see you later, hyung!" namjoon took off, leaving his drink and off with his bag of art supplies.

jimin slumped back in his chair. "hey, jin?" jimin tilted his head towards the elder.

"yeah, chim?" seokjin turned at the mention of his name.

"even though we're usually at the pond, talking, laughing, being ourselves, today.. we have the palace all to ourselves. i don't wanna go to the pond today." jimin smirked.

seokjin quirked an eyebrow at jimin's change of attitude. "what do you want to do, then..?"

"i wanna fuck around." jimin laughed. "forget we're princes for a sec, change my clothes, act like i'm not park jimin, prince of the sea."

"you in?"

"are you kidding me? of course i'm in." seokjin laughed, this was not a very princely thing to do, but who cares right? they've wasted their golden years being princes and acting like they're not in their early twenties.

"let's go then." jimin smirked, as the best day of their entire time of being royalty began.

"first on our list, change clothes." jimin said, listing all the things he had written down in his head. "we're sneaking out in town." jimin opened his closet door with a swift motion, and pulled out a box.

"why do you have all of this?" seokjin laughed. "masks, coats, sunglasses..

jimin quirked an eyebrow. "you think I've never dreamed of sneaking out of this place for a day?"

"true. I think we all thought that." seokjin admitted. "i think we should all sneak out one day, y'know? as a group. have fun and be normal people. see what it's like through the eyes of the normal." seokjin planned out, already imagining what a fun day it would be.

"yeah, that's a good idea." jimin stopped for a second. "you don't know how many conversations I've had with everyone that included sneaking out of this damn place, even namjoon is tired of this expensive piece of shit."

"we should propose that idea to the rest, but for now.." he trailed off and finished his disguise with his sunglasses. "how do i look?" jin turned to jimin, smiling.

jimin's eyes trailed up and down, "great!" jimin strapped his black mask, and then turned to seokjin as well. "and how do i look?"

"amazing if i do say so myself." seokjin smiled, and took jimin's wrist. "let's get going, shall we?"

"for the best day of our lives?" jimin chuckled, "i wouldn't even think about missing it."

"ey, hop on my back." seokjin came to a stop and motioned for jimin to come closer.

jimin laughed, "you serious?"

"yeah! it's only to the exit, if i don't get way too out of hand." seokjin winked and jimin rolled his eyes playfully. "hop on my back!"

"if you say so." jimin laughed and slowly climbed up seokjin's back, and he wrapped his legs around his waist, and draped his arms around his neck.

"we're going out the back door, right?" jimin asked as anxiety flowed through his body.

"well yeah, if we don't want to get caught of course. ready?"

jimin took a deep breath. "ready."

jimin barely held on as seokjin was down the stairs in a second. through the corridor and out the garden, the only thing keeping jimin from falling right off was seokjin's broad shoulders.

"you didn't tell me you were this fast!" jimin laughed in fear as some of his bright orange locks flew back from the speed at which seokjin was going. who thought this man would be this fast, even with jimin on his back?

"i use to be on the track team when i was a kid!" seokjin replied as he turned a sharp corner, and jimin yelped.

"let go let go let go--!" jimin begged as seokjin came to a stop, and collapsed.

seokjin was out of breathe, who wouldn't be though? especially when you're running at sonic speed?

"amazing." jimin whispered as he sat down on the ground, helping jin catch his breath.

seokjin rose up again, and stretched his legs. "we're outside the garden, the town is just down the street."

"you serious?" jimin jolted to where seokjin was looking at, lips parted. "that's great!" jimin grinned and got up in a heartbeat.

"this is so great!" jimin laughed excitedly, "I've never done anything this exciting before. a one in a life time experience, my dear seokjin!"

jimin wrapped his arm around seokjin's shoulder, and seokjin smiled under his mask. "yeah. this is great. but we better get a move on and do all the things we wanna do before night falls."

"yeah! come on!" jimin grinned, acting like a puppy in love and took seokjin's hand, taking both jin and himself on an adventure. they were two princes on the run, trying to be who they always wished were.

"second thing: now that we have our disguise so none of the royal guards could catch us," jimin started to list the second thing he had on mind. "let's get a makeover. well, not so much our hair and the rest, but only our clothes." he chuckled.

"what style did you have in mind?" seokjin tilted his head at the boy holding his hand.

"well, the royal attire.. it has an elegant feeling to it y'know? silk and lace, and patterns you wouldn't find on a tacky aunt. i was thinking of finding something else, something new." jimin expressed his feelings. "my goal is to find more punk fashioned clothing though, yours?"

"i think i might do that as well, or be soft and go for pastel." seokjin laughed.

"awh, seokjin is a little softie." jimin teased.

"awh, shortstuff thinks he's tough." seokjin came back with an even bigger tease, and jimin fell silent. seokjin started to laugh and jimin muttered a barely audible "shut up".

"this shop?" seokjin turned to jimin, and jimin stifled a laugh.

"woah there, mister 2007-- we're looking for a punk look, not straight up goth." jimin pointed to one of the items at display. "look at that! don't tell me that isn't goth!"

"you're right.." seokjin trailed off. ".. Hot Topic?"

"there he goes again.." jimin sighed. "when was the last time you heard Hot Topic was the go to place for punks, and not teenage emos?" jimin emphasized.

"when i say punk, you gotta think of the pricks in movies, y'know the ones, right? the bad boy, jacket wearing pricks who play electric guitar in a rock band?" jimin emphasized even more using his hands. "those ones. you gotta think of white shirts, black leather jackets, piercings, skinny jeans. that shit."

"well if you're looking for all that," as if a light bulb shone above seokjin's head. "i'm pretty sure that's the place." he pointed with his slender finger at a small corner shop, screaming "i'm the 70's if it was a person".

jimin gasped, and took seokjin's cheeks in his hands. "for once in my life, i thank god for your pretty face"

jimin had ran off as seokjin was just a couple of steps behind him, smiling and holding his left cheek as butterflies coursed through his stomach, setting up a hurricane of orange, black, blue and white. "you think i'm pretty.."

"seokjin, get your ass over here!" jimin slightly shouted to get seokjin's attention, and he in fact did and jogged over to jimin.

"i could kiss you right now because you struck gold!" seokjin's eyes lit up, and he smiled back at the beaming jimin. "by the time we get out, no one would even think 'hey, isn't that park jimin and kim seokjin?'"

and without a doubt, when they came out of that store, they couldn't even recognise themselves. they had exactly what jimin had in mind; black leather jackets, white shirts and skinny jeans, and a couple of accessories here and there. they even wanted piercings other than the ones they already have, but decided against it since it would be going overboard.

"what to do next, my dear jimin?" seokjin teased and nugged jimin a bit, and a mischievous smile grew on his face which made even seokjin think 'oh no'.

"the next thing i was thinking was.. what if we got in a street fight?" the suggestion made seokjin jump and he immediately scrambled for a more passive thing to do.

"or! or we could go to a music shop and buy some punk rock albums?"

"i'm pretty sure my suggestion is better." jimin smirked, and seokjin huffed.

"a street fight?! jimin you're out of your mind, don't you clearly see that this guy is out of shape? not ready to fight?" jimin quirked an eyebrow.

"oh please, the only thing you do besides hang out with me is work out." jimin rolled his eyes.

"no i don't.." seokjin replied softspokenly, immediately getting shy.

"seokjin, you're ripped." jimin deadpanned and continued. "your problem is lack of self confidence."

"and your suggestion is.." seokjin went on, and jimin still looked at him with weary eyes. "let's get in a street fight!˝

seokjin shook his head. ˝and.. you're dead ass crazy. i still don't believe i, kim seokjin, am suitable for a fight. i could never even punch my own sister.˝

˝you can do it though.˝ jimin tilted his head in such a manner that comforted jin. ˝i believe you can do it, you have my support. isn't that enough? what more could you lose?˝

˝my teeth?˝

˝stop fooling around!˝ jimin laughed and lightly punched seokjin, and seokjin started a laughing fit of his own. ˝i really don't think the punk life is for someone like us, complete softies.˝

jimin broke his shell, ˝true. but seriously, what do we have to lose? we're young and still finding ourselves, why not use that fact to our advantage?˝

˝fine.. but to something less extreme, let's say, buying punk rock albums?˝ seokjin nudging jimin, ˝admit it. getting into a street fight now is way out of our league. that's for like the pro fake punks, or actual punks.˝

˝okay yeah, i'll admit.˝

that night they came back in a fight of laughs, surprised to know that the rest still haven't come back. have they sneaked out too? probably not, but it would be fun if they did, so they could all share their experience and compare them.

though, for now, welcome to the daily life of park jimin and kim seokjin.