#NO OTHER WAY WILL DO WHEN IT COMES TO GON CARRYING HIS PRINCESS MUST CARRY HIM LIKE THE PRINCESS HE IS 😤😤😤😤😤😤

[killuaisaprincess]

Guard

“There! Is that better for my princess?”

Killua looks up with puffed-out cheeks, harrumphing, but he slowly presses his head to Gon’s chest, nuzzling against it, smiling.

“M-maybe a little… s-stupid…”

[beigehearts]

BRO IVE BEEN WAITING FOR A POLY ASK: AND A YANDERE ONE??? THIS IS A GOLD MINE Thank you so much butterscotch princess😭

CW: mental/physical abuse, kidnap, fighting

Of course you love the both of them, if not you wouldn't be here. Or at least you did love them. They were a couple and you weren't particularly interested in being a home wrecker. Yet, you can't hide anything from these two, they're definitely not stupid. To be honest things were becoming stale for Hisoka, and that's when they invited you into their relationship. Everything seemed so perfect at first, two men that you loved dearly who provided a balanced life. You could go to Hisoka for something exciting and new, but sit down with Illumi and relax. The three of you made a power throuple. But if it seems like it is too good to be true, it is. It really was too good.

It had been a few months into the relationship when there were red flags. Illumi and Hisoka never fought for each other, they never had to. You made sure they had their own time with each other. It was when it came to you that there was a problem. Constant arguing and fights over who gets to spend time with you and enjoy your company. Your idea of all of you hanging out was shut down, they each wanted their alone time with you. It went on like this for a few months. Until one day, it all stopped.

Suddenly it seemed as if your boyfriends had never fought in the first place. They never argued over spending time with you, they just knew when they could be with you one on one. At first you thought it was great. You were worried about their relationship for one another, and if it would last much longer like this. They must have talked about it civilly, otherwise it couldn't be so easy for them.

All of the red flags had been lowered and it was back to the honeymoon phase. The three of you got to cuddle at night while you could still have coffee with just one of them in the morning, or they could together. Honestly you weren't so sure about a polyamorous relationship in the beginning, but now you wouldn't change it for the world. Well, at that time you wouldn't have.

Suddenly the atmosphere changed, and you did not see it coming. Whenever you planned to go out, Hisoka and Illumi seemed to be on the same page about you not leaving. ----

"Hey, I'm gonna go hang out with some friends, I'll see you guys later!" You called out as you tied your shoes.

Illumi began taking off your coat and now you were very confused. "You shouldn't go out." He stated.

Hisoka chimed in from the kitchen while he made coffee, "It's going to rain, we don't want you to get caught in a storm."

"I'll just bring an umbrella, and anyway, Daisy will just drive me home." You responded.

Illumi shook his head and hung up your coat, "The news said it would be really bad today."

Hisoka added, "You guys may not even be able to drive in that kind of rain."

---- Everytime it went like this, there was always an excuse. It even got so bad that you were fired from your job. You spend every day at home now. Any time you even mention leaving anymore now, it isn't just excuses. "You won't be able to protect yourself." "Fine, if you get hurt it's your fault." "You can't apply to another job, you really think you can get another one after being fired?" Always something, and it's really starting to get to you. Soon enough it only escalated at it had been. You got dressed to leave and ignored their excuses, opening the door and stepping out. That's when it happened, that's when everything really changed. As you went to shut the door behind yourself, it slammed shut. It slammed shut right on your fingers.

Illumi came out and carried you back inside while you gasped and cradled your hand to your chest. "This is what happens when you don't listen to us. You'll get hurt." That's when you realized how bad things really had gotten. You were pretty sure that three of your fingers were broken, but Illumi wrapped them up with a splint and called it a day.

You just can't do this anymore. If they aren't going to let you leave, then you're going to have to sneak out. Or devise a plan. Of course Hisoka went through your messages, but that would be perfect for your plan. You managed to create a text chain with your 'sick older sister'. She asked that you come to see her ASAP because she is not doing well. This is something that they would allow you to do since it would be a one time thing.

As you laced your shoes and shrugged on a jacket, Hisoka and Illumi watched. Hisoka's hand was wrapped around Illumi's waist, and you could see his anxious grip on him.

"Okay, I'll be back at 4 pm." You had learned to lie through your teeth like a pro.

Hisoka forced a smile and nodded, "Illumi will be there to pick you up."

You give the both of them a quick kiss on the cheek and trot out of the door while waving. "See you soon!"

The sound of the door clicking closed behind you was the sound of jail break. You couldn't help it... You skipped down the hallway while giggling, until your skip turned into a run. And when you turned around? No one was there.

----

Killua and Gon were a god send. They accepted you as a person and your friendship became unbreakable. Each day when you woke up, you were excited to face the day. Most of your free time is spent with these two goof balls. If not with them, you're working.

They swung by your workplace when your shift ended so you guys could hangout. While these two are younger than you, they're very mature. Sometimes. And all of their friends are your friends, Kurapika and Leorio who are closer to your age. You would hang out with them too if it weren't for the fact they were always out of town for work.

The three of you make your way to the convenience store. Killua had been begging for the past two days that you guys go get Choco Robots.

Gon checks his phone and announces, "Kurapika and Leorio will be back tomorrow! Leorio said they got a hotel room for the night and would be back to travelling by tomorrow."

You and Killua know that means they're sharing a bed, but Gon is oblivious. And it's really not important for Gon to know at the moment.

Killua throws his arms in the air and yawns, "You always get off work so late. Why can't you work any earlier?"

"Tell that to my manager, she's the one in control of that." You retort.

An idea pops into Gon's head and you can tell because his eyes light up. "Instead of going all the way home, you should sleep over with us tonight! Alluka would love to see you again!"

"You know that her place is closer to us right now than ours, right?" Killua asks.

Gon's eyebrows furrow and he puts a finger to his lip, "Oh yeah..."

The convenience store's doors slide open and make a quiet 'ding' sound. Killua makes a bee line for the Choco Robots and begins putting the whole stock into a basket. You and Gon look at the drinks section and he settles on some strawberry lemonade. Besides the sleeping cashier, you three are the only ones perusing through the gas station sized mart.

Gon is pointing out the condoms and asking what they are when the soft 'ding' of the door sounds out. Killua is blushing and telling him to put the box back while you hold back laughter.

"Gon! Stop it! Just- just put them back!" He stutters out. They may have seemed mature for their age at first, but moments like this make you question it.

You feel a hot breath on the back of your neck and the voice to follow shakes you to your core.

"So this is where you've been hiding."

You whip around and push Hisoka away from you, it doesn't do anything but he does step back. Next to him is Illumi, eyeing not only you but his little brother. You knew they were brothers because Killua told you, but you never expected to see them in the same room together.

Killua's eyes go wide and Gon is already in a defensive position.

Ilumi takes his attention away from Killua and he leers at you instead. "That was a long trip to the hospital. Did you get lost leaving the building?"

"Hey! Why don't you just leave y/n alone?!" Gon barks at them.

It all happens in seconds, if you had blinked you would have missed it. Killua is slammed into the floor and his head makes a hard 'clunk' sound. Before Gon has the chance to attack, he's throw into a display rack, and tumbles to the ground. Killua is too dazed to react. Hisoka makes sure Gon can't get back up by stomping on his stomach, making him cough up blood.

Your last moment of freedom is spent by watching your friends be beat up. A cloth is pressed against your mouth and nose, and your arms are held behind your back. It smells heavily like cleaning supplies, potent ones. It takes a few breaths before you get dizzy, and until you begin losing control of your body. Hisoka is bent down in front of you and he places a kiss to your forehead.

You wish you knew what he said, but you've already succumbed to unconsciousness. Your freedom is relinquished once again.

[atsukashii]

Hi is it ok if I request y/n x kuroo & she/her & ☀️ & pink please?

smooth like butter, like a criminal undercover gon' pop like trouble breaking into your heart like that

✘ hey google: how do you tell if a guy is flirting with you?

✘ GENRE: fluff

✘ WARNINGS: aged up characters, bookshop au

✘ WORD COUNT: 1.9k

“I’d like to take you to the movies, but they don’t let you bring in your own snacks.”

Closing your work locker, you raise an eyebrow at the familiar six foot, raven haired guy, who smirks down at you as if he just won first prize. In cringe worthy pick up lines? Yeah he can take that medal.

“Are you calling me a snack?” You ask, adjusting the strap of your bag.

“Will you go out with me if I say yes?” Kuroo asks again, wagging his eyebrows at you teasingly, and you immediately know he’s messing with you.

“Not a chance.” Offering him a scathing glare, you spin on your heels and slip out the front door of the shop. When you’d first gotten the job at the small bookshop near your house, you'd have been ecstatic. Although you’d been less ecstatic about your new colleague who you’d never met before in your life, but had been slipping you cheesy and corny pick up lines every day for months.

You didn’t even know that there were that many ways to flirt with someone, but alas, Kuroo proved you wrong every shift. At first, you’d been a flustered bumbling mess trying to come up with a response, but as you caught on to how his hazel eyes glinted with untamed mischief, you’d decided that Kuroo wasn’t your favourite person.

That wasn’t to say that you by any means hated the guy, there was no way you could when he was literally one of the nicest people you’d ever come across in your life. He held doors open for you, and would volunteer to carry the new boxes of stock out back because they were heavy - although you had an inkling that was partly to show off. In the end, Kuroo is sweet, kind, and hilarious. But he thinks that hitting on you every day, and asking you out as a joke is also hilarious.

And it’s hilariously pissing you off.

Because somewhere down along the way, between the angel references and calling you a ‘cute-cumber’ you’d found yourself smiling at the lines. You found yourself anticipating getting to work shifts with him, just to see him and for the chance to witness the familiar rogue smile and the pure giddiness that emits from his very being.

But to him, it was a joke. And that left more than a bad taste in your mouth.

Adjusting your bag once more, you try to slide the store door closed behind you to keep the aircon inside - a stark contrast to the summer heat bearing down on you. Before it can close completely, a hand rolls the glass door to a stop and you find yourself once again looking up into hazel eyes.

“Not finished?” You snipe back, having reached your quota of fake flirting for the day. Kuroo doesn’t flinch at your tone, or maybe he just chooses not to notice judging by the smile that graces his face. Maybe, just maybe you could eventually get over him. It’s not going to go anywhere, if it was going to, he wouldn’t have waited literal months to make a move. So maybe, you can let him go.

“Oh I have plenty more for you princess, but I just thought you might want this first.” In his hand is a copy of the book you’d been reading behind the counter of your shifts. Blinking twice, you realise it’s got similar dog eared pages and a crinkled spine from continuous use - that's your book. Instinctively you peer into your bag on your shoulder, and alas, it's empty. With an empty mind, you take the item from Kuroo’s outstretched hand, and offer him a quick thanks as you try to swallow the emotion in your throat.

“You’re most welcome. Walk home safe, I'll see you tomorrow princess.” Kuroo responds with a rogue wink that has you flushing from head to toe. His knowing grin proves that was the response he was looking for, so you quickly shove the book in your back and practically run from your work - swearing that you can feel his gaze on you the whole way home.

Yeah, there’s no chance you’re going to get over him.

This is cemented on your next night shift. You stand behind the counter, your eyes glancing up from the book you’re reading to the group of teenage girls giggling amongst the young adult isle. Really, it should be an actual law for people to be as quiet in bookstores as they are in libraries.

The door opens once more, and you begin to groan internally at the thought of even more rowdy teenagers coming in, but instead Kuroo slinks through the door in all his six foot two glory. Dressed in his work shirt, some black jeans and his usual sneakers, he looks good and the bastard knows it from the raised eyebrows he shoots you when he catches you looking. You don’t reply, but instead turn back to your book, ignoring him and the gaggling teenagers who suddenly shut up as he walks past them to go to the back room. You can’t blame them as their eyes stay glued to his every movement. Kuroo walks like he was meant to carry the world on his shoulders, but instead spins it like a basketball on one finger. As if the most difficult things for him are effortless. Like a god amongst men. Okay, let's not go that far. If he ever heard that, his ego would asphyxiate everyone from here to the south pole.

“Do you like my shirt?” Kuroo’s question has you turning around before you can stop yourself, but you’re all levels of confused as he holds the hem of his shirt in pinched fingers away from his body. His shirt? It’s his work shirt…

“Uh it’s your work shirt…” You manage to mumble out, brows still furrowed, completely baffled.

“Yeah but its made of a different material.” He points out, moving closer to you, only looking up from his shirt and to you when he’s standing only a few feet away. “Boyfriend material.” His grin is actually blinding, so you’re not sure if you’re squinting from that, or from the way you scrunch up your nose in distaste at his line.

“I hate you.” You grumble, turning away and looking down at your book once more, letting your hair fall over your cheeks to hide the flush splashed brightly across them.

“Hate me? Why must you hurt me so princess?” Kuroo jokes, and you find yourself getting more and more disappointed as he grows quiet and begins to start on his own work for the shift. It’s not until you both notice the gaggling girls practically drooling on the floor at him that you decide you need to take your break.

Closing your book loud enough to startle the group of girls and the guy flicking aimlessly through a volleyball magazine at your side. “I’m going for my ten.” You offer in explanation as you try to move out back. You don’t get to even make it past the counter before there's a warm hand wrapping around your own. Kuroo’s hand completely engulfs yours in the best ways and you can’t help but gape at it as it pulls your walk to a stop.

“Are you alright?” He asks, drawing your eyes reluctantly from your entwined hands to his face, and once you spot genuine concern there, you hesitate with your response. How do you say that no, you’re not okay because would you be if the person that you liked jokingly asked you out on a daily basis for months on repeat? But never meant it?

“Yeah, I'm fine.” Kuroo doesn’t let go just yet, but instead scratches the back of his neck with his other hand nervously.

“You know, if I'm honestly bothering you, please tell me. I don’t ever want to make you uncomfortable y/n,” He offers, shame and hurt flashing brightly in his eyes - and it shocks you stupid for a few seconds. It takes you an added moment that he’s talking about his teasing. Wait, he thinks he’s bothering me? Is he?

“Kuroo, if it was bothering me I would have told you alright?” You say softly, your gaze drifting back to your hand. “I mean sure sometimes it can be a bit much but that's mainly because I'm an idiot.” Not expecting those words, Kuroo’s nerves bleed into a confused frown that has you wanting to reach up and thumb away the line between his pinched brows.

“An idiot? Princess, if what I'm saying is bothering you-”

“It’s not what you’re saying that’s bothering me, it’s the joking.” The second the words leave your mouth, you wish you could reach out, grab them, and shove them back down your throat, because the way Kuroo drops your hand as if it burnt him hurts more than you thought it would.

“Joking?” His tone is utterly perplexed, and this time, you’re the one looking back at him with confusion. A loud laugh barks from his chest and you immediately feel embarrassed for absolutely nothing. Kuroo is laughing so hard and obnoxiously that tears actually crest the corner of his eyes, and at this rate you’re ready to just walk out the door if it means you don’t have to deal with this embarrassment for another second.

“You mean to tell me, that all this time you thought I was joking?” Kuroo gets out between laughs, and you feel your stomach drop at his words. What does he mean did you think he was joking? Was he not?

Your silence is answer enough because he runs a hand through his thick dark hair and leans back on the counter behind him.

“Jesus Christ Y/n!”

“You would laugh at me after you said them!” You defend, pointing an accusing finger in his way. How could you not think he was joking when he’d laugh at you, his whole being the very embodiment of mischief when he would say his lines.

“Because your face would go red and you’d tell me I was an idiot under your breath, because it was cute!” Kuroo rebuts right back, trying once more not to laugh, and you can’t help but groan. You cannot believe that this entire time, he was actually trying to ask you out on a date. Well, you can’t fault his perseverance and tenacity.

“Kuroo,” you grumble, bridging your fingers and pressing them to your forehead in thought, just trying to calm your raging heart at the fact that this is happening.

“Y/n,” he grins right back, and you can feel him closing in on your position before you can even see him. But once you open your eyes again, letting your hands fall from your face, Kuroo’s stunning features are right up close and more beautiful than you’d thought.

“Does this mean that you’ll go out with me when I ask this time?” You really do try for your pride's sake to not flush at his words, but heat still crawls up your neck and Kuroo’s growing smile tells you that your mental attempt to stop it isn’t working.

“Yes, I will.” You say, letting the smile tug at the corners of your mouth.

“Good, I'll remember that for my new line tomorrow.”

✘ A/N: more fluffy kurro for ya day, y'all i am l i v i n g for this man rn

©️ 2021 all rights reserved to atsukashii, do not change, edit, translate, or repost any works on any platform.

[your-eternal-muse]

Use me (Part two)

Summery: Reader takes Spencer up on his offer to rid her system of "The Wizard".

Warnings: Hard core, nasty ass smut; fingering, oral sex,(female receiving); penetration; unprotected sex/creampie; multiple orgasams

Pairing: Spencer Reid x Female!Reader

A/N: Here it is. Part two. I'll link part one in a bit after I do some things, but other than that enjoy! And yes, there will be a part three.

Part 1

Im dead.

The substance that he injected me with was lethal, and I'm laying in a dark alley somewhere, dead, because kissing Spencer Reid is heaven.

His hands grip my hips, holding me against him as he presses me into his window.

His lips are soft and warm, and easily tell me what to do and when to do it.

My body is on fire in the best way possible.

My fingers run their way through his hair, tugging on the satin strands as he kisses his way down my jaw, leaving bite marks until he finds the pulse point just above my collarbone.

Every touch, every kiss, sends waves down to my core, where it waits drowning in my juices.

He's situated between my legs, his ever present bulge pressing just so onto me.

It's driving me insane.

Without thinking, my hips buck forward, and the small ounce of pressure starts a ball forming in my gut.

I feel him smile against my neck, before he detaches himself.

We're both breathless, chests heaving, and my hands are shaking as I grip his dress shirt.

"Tell me what you need, Princess."

Fantasies, y/n, think of your fantasies.

"I-I need your fingers."

While I'm talking, he removed the holster from his hip, setting it on the desk beside us.

"Please, Spence. You haven't even touched me and I'm so close."

His hands immediately find the button of my jeans, undoing them and pushing them down just enough to have room.

He doesn't hesitate, cupping my sex through my panties.

"So fucking wet. Is this what I do to you?"

I can't speak through the mewls leaving my throat, so I just nod.

"Words, please." His voice is steady, and I know if it were different circumstances, he'd punish me for making him repeat himself.

But right now, he just runs his fingers over the fabric, back and forth through the wetness.

"Yes, fuck, you make me so wet Spencer."

That must have been what he wanted to hear, because in one swift motion, without removing his fingers from my skin, he goes up my stomach, and then down again, slipping under the band of my underwear.

He runs his fingers through my folds, easily slipping a finger into my heat.

My hand clutches his upper arm, my mouth hanging open in ecstacy as he pumps his finger in and out.

"Tell me what you want me to do, Princess. I want to make you feel good."

You're already doing that babe.

I try and gather my thoughts, and right as I'm about to speak, he slips another finger in.

"Fuck." My head hits the glass panel of his window.

My fingers are going to leave bruises on his bicep, but I really could not care less at this point.

His lips attach themselves to my neck, and the warm ball deep inside me starts to grow.

But I need more.

"F-Faster. Please go faster."

"Anything for you, baby girl."

His fingers move faster within me, and I grind down into them every time they enter me.

He leaves my neck, looking down at the work he's doing, his breathing a lot smoother than my own.

With his free hand, he takes the hand of mine that's still gripping his shirt, and he leads it up to his lips.

He gently kisses the tips of my first two fingers before taking them into his mouth, swirling his tongue around the digits, all while keeping direct eye contact.

I almost cum at the sight.

He leads them from his mouth, down my stomach, stopping to rest at the bundle of nerves at the top.

"Touch yourself."

Yes sir.

I frantically start moving circles over my clit, as his fingers continue pumping in and out of me.

And then it happens.

He curls his fingers as he enters me, and sparks are sent up and down my spine.

I can't help but gasp.

"Yes, fuck fuck fuck, right there. Holy shit."

His long slender fingers move faster and faster within me, curling around that pretty little spot until boom.

My orgasm hits me like a train, as I clench around his fingers, which are still moving as I cum.

My chest rises and falls, as I try to catch my breath, and he removes his hand.

And for one, blissful moment, the fire disappears.

Before it comes crashing back.

He seems to read me like a book, pulling me towards him again.

"You don't think I'm finished with you yet, do you?"

Thank fuck.

I can't help but smile, moving my hands up his chest to lay at the nape of his neck, pulling him down into another kiss.

His hands run down my back, over my ass, to rest on the back of my thighs.

With one finger, he taps the muscle, and on shaky legs, I manage to jump high enough for him to place his hands just above the back of my knees to carry me.

While he makes his way through his apartment to his bedroom, I trail kisses down his neck, leaving marks of my own in their wake.

He lays me on the bed, hovering over me as one hand finds the hem of my shirt, pushing it up over my stomach.

He steps back, standing at the foot of his bed as I lift my grey t-shirt up over my head, tossing it somewhere in his room.

Sweat covers my skin, making my hair stick to my face and neck, and my chest glistens in the dim orange light of his room.

I watch as he brings his fingers up to his mouth, and slowly sucks off my juices.

I brush hair out of my face, watching with lustful fascination.

They leave his mouth with a pop before going to his tie and undoing it.

"You taste so fucking sweet, Princess."

One by one, his fingers travel down his shirt, undoing every button on their way down.

I sit up, crawling over to him, pushing the fabric from his shoulders.

My fingers run over his chest, and down his stomach, pausing at his belt as I undo the buckle.

His hands come up to cradle my face, as he kisses me again.

I'll never get used to him kissing me.

I want his taste engraved into my tongue.

Why the hell can't I have an eidetic memory?

Even without one though, I know I'll never forget this.

My hand sneaks into his pants, palming him over his boxers.

His moan breaks the kiss, and his eyes fall shut.

How can someone look so beautiful with my hand down their pants?

"As much as I would love to see that pretty little mouth wrapped around my cock," his breathes are more labored now, and his hands fall from my face to grasp my hips. "Tonight's about making you feel good."

I didn't even realize his hands had moved until the clasp of my bra was undone.

"Now, be a good girl and lie down." He whispers.

I'm past the point of being embarrassed, laying down without another word, a blush crawling up my neck.

"God, you're so fucking beautiful,"He crawls over me, encaging me in his arms.

He kisses me once, before traveling down my neck and chest, stopping only to suckle each of my nipples into his mouth, before continuing down my stomach.

He loops his fingers into the belt loops of my jeans, pulling them down the rest of the way before tossing them behind him.

He then starts at my right ankle, and begins to kiss up my leg, repeating with my left before he comes to settle in between my legs.

He pulls my panties down slowly, watching my reaction as every second passes.

"If you want me to stop, just say so, okay?"

God, I love him.

Not likely, but okay.

I nod, before remembering he told me to use my words. "I understand."

"Good."

I'm going to marry this man.

Purely for the fact that he eats pussy like it's his last fucking meal.

My fingers twist themselves into his hair, as he holds my sex against his mouth, licking and sucking like he hasn't eaten in years.

I spare a glance down and my heart almost stops.

His eyes are closed, and his hair is starting to curl from the humidity in the room.

He must sense me watching, because his eyes open, and I feel him smirk against me.

He licks up through my folds, stopping to suck on my clit until I'm shaking underneath him.

He moves his hand from my hip and grabs one from his hair, once again leading it to my clit as his mouth moves down.

I start rubbing circles, but stutter as I feel his tongue dart into me.

He's watching me now, the way I quiver underneath him, the pathetic moans echoing through his bedroom.

He does it again and again, and I can feel my orgasm teetering on the edge.

He can tell as my circles go frantic, and my hand in his hair holds me closer to him than I thought possible.

"Spencer, I'm gon-"

I'm falling.

Stars explode in my vision, and my back arches off the bed as I cum into his mouth.

I fall, breathless, onto his mattress as be retracts himself from me, a proud smile etched onto his face.

The moment of calm lasts longer this time, but it once again comes back, burning me at the edges.

"I need, I need one more." I plead, my throat hoarse from screaming.

He stands, removing his belt, and letting his pants fall down to the floor.

I lift myself up into my elbows and smile at him.

He pushes his boxers off his hips and I stare, open mouthed as his erection pops free.

God, it's better than I could have ever imagined.

I wipe my chin to make sure I'm not drooling and he laughs.

"Now, I don't have any condoms on me, but-"

"I'm on the pill."

It's the fastest I've spoken tonight, and I slowly start spreading my legs.

"I'm on the pill, and I want, no, need you to cum inside me." I bite my lip, and bat my eyelashes at him. "I even used my words."

I see his dick twitch and he groans, the muscles in his stomach tensing.

"As you wish, Princess."

He crawls back onto the bed, pumping his dick in his hand a couple times, before sliding it through my folds to pick up some wetness.

He isn't even in me yet, and already my hands grip the sheets around us.

"You ready?"

"Yes sir."

He moans, deep and low within his chest, and he smiles."I love it when you call me that."

And then he slowly pushes into me, and my eyes squeeze shut because holy shit he feels better than I could have ever thought.

My dildo at home doesn't even compare to this.

He bottoms out, and he takes a moment to catch his breath."God, you feel so fucking good, baby girl."

I wrap my legs around his waist, and pull his lips down to mine as he slowly starts moving.

I can see sweat build up on his hairline, and his room is going to feel of sex for days.

A part of me thinks he's not gonna care all that much.

His breathing is starting to match my own, and he nuzzles his face into the crook of my neck as his strokes become faster.

My back moves against the softness of his sheets, and my nails dig into the skin of his back.

It doesn't take long for that warm ball to start growing towards my (hopefully) final climax.

"Im cl-close, Spence."

His breath is hit on my neck, and the speed tells me he's close too.

But than his hand finds my hip, and lifts me just so, and the angle in which he snaps back into me makes me choke on air.

Stroke after stroke, he hits a spot deep within me, and I know I'm done for when he whispers "Cum for me," into my ear.

And boy, do I cum.

My soul leaves my body, and I can barely register the warm feeling of his release inside of me as he rides out both of our orgasms.

When I open my eyes, my nails are at the bottom of his back and he's laying on top of me.

I wait for the heat to come back but it doesn't.

My head is clear, and my skin no longer feels like it's on fire.

His head is resting on my chest and I move some hair away from his face, placing a soft kiss on to his forehead.

"Thank you." I don't speak louder than a whisper, not wanting to break the delicate moment. 

I had dreams about this happening. 

Granted, not exactly like this, but I had them.

Now that it's happened, I don't want to let it go.

I don't want to let him go.

He lifts his head and smiles, his eyes soft and his dimples ever present in the dim lighting.

He's so beautiful.

"The pleasure was all mine, y/n." His voice was just as soft, just as afraid to break the fragile air.

He leans forward, kissing me gently one last time before he carefully climbs off of me. 

He leaves the room, and for a moment, I'm alone with my thoughts. And I realize my vagina aches. I reach a hand down and gingerly touch it and his when it pulses. I'm also pretty sure my legs are numb.

I wiggle my toes, just to make sure I can, and he walks back in with a washcloth.

He concentrates as he wipes the cool fabric across my skin, clearing away the evidence of our explosion. He folds it, getting a clean side, before reaching up and wiping my brow and face.

He brushes some hair out of my face, and I grab his wrist, holding his palm there.

His thumb swipes across the apple of my cheek and I close my eyes, content to staying here.

But he has other plans.

"As much as you don't want to, we need to go to the hospital. We need to talk to the team."

I sigh, knowing he's right.

"Hotch is going to be pissed that I gave in to exactly what the unsub wanted. But you know what?" I look up at him.

"What?"

"It was my choice. And I don't regret it for a second."

He smiles, and I swear I see a blush dust his cheeks, but he removes his hand and stands, gathering the clothes strewn about the room.

I sit up on his bed, carefully swinging my legs over the side to place my feet on the hardwood floor, not quite trusting myself to stand.

He hands me my clothes and even goes as far as helping me slide my jeans back up my legs, kissing me once they're situated on my hips.

He goes about putting on his own clothes as I slip my t-shirt back over my head, finally pushing myself up off the bed.

As soon as I'm upright, the room starts spinning, and I place a hand on my forehead, trying to turn to see Spencer.

He drops his shirt as he rushes forward, and my world goes dark.

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[oh-for-fic-sake]

The Home Coming

Masterlist

When Henry returns to a depressed pregnant wife its his mission to get his girls back to normal, even if it means a showdown with a new mother at the Paige’s preschool.

Warnings: Swearing, Fluff, Angst, Anxiety and Self esteem issues

A/N: so here is another House to home chapter! wanted this to be a sweet romantic chapter to a point not entierly sure about it but its finished so I hope you all enjoy

Taglist: @two-unbeatable-beaters​ @thatgirly81​ @angelofthorr @iloveyouyen​ @sofiebstar​ @thefangirlsblog​

Henry sighed as the phone rang, he was trying to videocall you but you hadn't answered. He was going to surprise you, filming had over run and he'd been held back an extra two weeks but was currently by the side of your house hiding around the drive he was going to call you and do the whole 'look outside' thing but was loosing hope fast that you would answer. Then suddenly he was greeted with Paiges face holding the phone awkwardly as all children seemed to do.

"Hey poppet! What are you doing with Mummys phone?" She smiled and squealed at him.

"DADDYYY! HI DADDY!" He chuckled watching the way she moved clumsily through the house catching glimpses of kal as he followed her as she went up the stairs, his heart jumped as she moved fast and unsteady tipping this way and that.

"Hey! hey no running! You'll fall! That's it baby, good girl now what have you been doing today then little lady?" She grinned angling the phone to her face where he got a clear view up her nose.

"I went- I went to school! And then we did painting and did our letters and numbers and I got another star on my chart! Then I've been cheering up Mummy...When are you gonna come home Daddy? Shes sad and I think you can make her better..." Henry frowned you were all smiles when he phoned and face timed whats changed?.

"Paige what? Shes sad? Why baby? whats-how do you know Mummy is sad?" She hummed stopping finally holding the phone correctly he could tell she had just sat on the top step of the staircase as kal moved sitting beside her nudging her for a hug. She slung her little arm around his back making him pant happily.

"Well she just is....She stays in her pajamas most of the time and she is sad she cries sometimes..She doesn't think I hear her but I do...And she misses you, she cries in the bathroom and gets angry cos she can't have a bath" Henry frowned that the way Paige had said it, almost like its been happening for a while. He swallowed the lump in his throat.

"Its since the mean lady" Henry blinked confused.

"What lady? What happened to mummy baby?" Paige looked left and right then leaned into the phone

"The-theres a new girl at play school...Shes mean and she kicks and scratches people she keeps getting sent home cos shes bad! and her Mummy is the same...She-she called me and Mummy liars! And she said your not my real Daddy! And Mummy was bad for telling me you was!...Y-you are my real Daddy aren't you?" Henry was shocked to say the least! Just what the fuck has been going on he has never ever heard his little nugget ask something so fucking ridiculous!

"Of course I'm your real Daddy poppet! And don't you let anyone ever tell you otherwise little lady! What else has this nasty lady said?" Henry had to hold back as there was many swear words trying to creep into his outburst and he didn't need Paige to start repeating them.

"Well....Then she was really mean to Mummy calling her names! For a few while ,she said Mummy was fat and lazy and that if you were my Daddy you wont love her anymore when you come home... She was really mean and made Mummy sad....I told Mummy not to listen but she smiles and says she is okay...But she isn't...Patty is still nasty she said her Mummy said that you wasn't my Daddy cos Mummy doesn't have her ring on... " Henry took a moment your not wearing your ring? "Mummy doesn't wear her ring?" Paige hummed and tilted her head

"It's on a necklace..She was sad her fingers don't fit!" Ah, that makes sense your hands and feet swelt whilst you was pregnant with Paige...

Still Henry was shocked you would keep this from him,  he could hardly  believe what he was hearing. Why hadn't you said anything? Why was you letting this get to you? You were fucking amazing sexy and just drop dead gorgeous! And you wasn't fat you were pregnant ... which Henry found incredibly attractive anyway, he loved when you was pregnant, glowing carrying a piece of him inside you. It did things to him, he just loved how when people saw you they saw him to, they saw what he had done. Sure people knew what you'd done when they saw Paige but when you were pregnant it was...a piece of him was still there inside you growing.

He felt honoured that you'd allow him to do that, allowed him to get you pregnant, to undergo such a drastic bodily change. Sure women gain a little weight but he didn't care fuck if it bothered you once he gets the go ahead after the birth he will help you loose weight with giving you regular cardio bedroom style....Even if you didn't want to loose it you'd be undergoing some pretty strenuous cardio with him any way.

"Paige, thank you for telling me your a very good girl and I'm proud of you for helping her feel better but could you put your Mother on the phone please?" She looked up and sighed shaking her head.

"No Daddy, shes sleeping she tries not to but she can't help it! We was watching Paddington and she fell asleep....I was gon' get her fuzzy blankie" he watched as Paige got up moving but he called out to her sighing."No no your not carrying that down the stairs...Poppet come open the front door but be quiet don't wake your mother" she frowned but smiled moving down the steps slower than she had scaled them. Henry circled back to the front of the house waiting by the front door.

"Fuuckdge!-Hold the banisTER...Jesus...Your going to be the death of me child...God I hate watching you on the stairs nugget" she grinned as she made it to the last step then skipped to the door she heard a small sound from Henry ending the call and opened the door.

She jumped up at him happily giving him kisses as the tears started. He managed to slip into the house relatively quietly muffling Paige's sobs in his shoulder as he tucked one arm under her bottom a she moved reaching up to cuddle into his neck. He moved slowly sliding his suit case by the front door as he closed it, he rocked Paige shushing her trying to sooth her. His other hand was petting and excited Kal who was jumping up at him for his own cuddle.

"I know princess I know....Shh I've missed you to poppet, but I'm home now...That’s it.... Oh baby don't cry see? look daddy's back nugget and I've got a long time home now...Shh shhh good girl...You've been so good looking after Mummy and the baby for me huh?" She nodded whining into him still crying her heart out. He sighed kissing her head. 

Henry moved through the house seeing you crashed out on the sofa, he could see from here you wasn't yourself it was...Uou were his other half, his soulmate and even asleep he could just tell. He sighed looking down and kissed Paige's hair. He would leave you to sleep. Knowing just how tired you got around this time of the pregnancy, the months finally catching up with you and it was almost like your body tried to hibernate readying itself for the big day.

He moved around the sofa sitting in his armchair with Paige curled up on his chest. She sniffled a little fingers twisting into his blazer. He rocked slowly calming his little girl just watching you on the sofa wincing every now and then as you shifted. Our back must be playing up....And your breasts to by the way you held them protectively cupping the now huge mounds in your hands trying to ease their tenderness even in slumber. He sighed and slowly began to plan the night, he had to get you alone to talk, if what Paige said was true then you would be down and most likely have a panic attack or break down.

He knew the final term of pregnancy takes its toll on you physically and emotionally  and with this woman's cruel jabs you were probably down with low self esteem so he had to do something. Talk you through whatever silly notions  had been put in your head and then look after you...He would dote on you and Paige. A smile graced his face when he put together a plan.

"Hey poppet...Do you want to help Daddy with something?" She looked up head still on his chest, he moved wiping away stubborn tears.

"Wiv what Daddy?" He smiled at her then cast you a look, you really looked tired, not that he was surprised you were over eight months pregnant and still had to run around after Paige and kal alone. He cursed himself he would have given anything to be here for you but he had to work, provide for his growing family. He knew you didn't have anything against him working and you would never be angry over the long months apart. In that respect he was blessed not once had you ever used his absence against him even in the most bitter of disagreements, they were rare but they happened...Usually you were right and it ended up with him making it up to you in some overly cliché romantic way where you'd forgive him just to end the cheese fest.

"Well poppet I think I should use tonight to pamper my ladies...Do you know where Mummy’s nail varnish is?" Paige perked up giving one final sniffle and sat up

."Mummy’s nail varnish?... Can I have painted nails to?" Henry nodded at her tucking some loose curls behind her ears.

"Yes baby you can have painted toes to if you like!....I think Daddy has to make it up to his two special girls for being late. So I'm going to pamper the two of you....I will run Mummy a bubble bath and help her wash then I will paint your and Mummy’s toes and make some hot chocolate and we can make doggy pile in the den and watch a film...Does that sound good?" She smiled brightly

"And foot rubs Daddy?" He sighed and nodded

"Absolutely poppet! Now come on first things first lets look for some treats!" She smiled as he walked with her to the kitchen...he had an idea of what to do, a favorite of yours that he doesn't think you've had in years...Apple pie toasty and it was something Paige could help with...If you have the apples which you probably did for Paige's snacks.

"Aha! Here we go!" He sat Paige on the counter top and pulled a bag of apples from the fridge drawer where they kept longer he pulled out a medium pan and set it bedside Paige.

"Could you put a little bit a water in that baby girl?" She looked a little confused as Henry moved around the kitchen pulling out a chopping board apple corer and knife.

"Daddy? Mummy says you shouldn't cook....’member the soup...Shouldn't we go wake her and...Ask?" Henry rolled his eyes still moving about tipping out the small bag of apples

"Well baby the soup was...A one off”

"Daddy tomato soup's meant to be red...not brown"

"Yes...I know tha-”

"Did you though?" Henry eyed his child...Wow she really got sassy he raised a brow at her and a staring contest ensued... Henry lost his daughter was a force to be reckoned with at nearly four!! Fuck it was beginning to frighten him.

"As I was saying Missy-we are allowed to make these...Mummy’s favorite hot snack I used to make these for her all the time when we just started dating...And now I'm going to teach you pumpkin we are making special apple pie pockets! Now quickly I need some water in there just a little bit." Paige hummed and shrugged crawling the few inches swinging her legs into the deep butler sink and placed the pot under the tap filling about and inch or so.

"That enough daddy?" Henry moved peeking over and smiled.

"That’s perfect poppet here no-No daddy will move it you will spill baby!" He quickly moved the pot by the chopping board and came back guiding Paige as she crawled over and plopped herself down between the pot and chopping board.

"Now baby girl can you put the sliced apple in the pot once daddy has done it?" She nodded enthusiastically watching as Henry made quick work of the apples

"Daddy whats that thing?" She asked she said pointing to the apple corer as she collected the apple slices and popped them in the water.

"This? Well here you want a go?...Hold it with daddy that’s it... see we put it over the stem of the apple and push really hard!...That’s it push push push there we go! Well done!" She smiled as she pulled back and the center of the apple came with it.

"And that’s how we get the core out now wait right there and daddy will quickly chop these up and we can start cooking!" She smiled kicking her feet as Henry made quick work of the apples Paige dutifully collected them she dropped a few slices here and there but Kal was quick to catch them mid fall making Paige giggle loudly and 'drop' a few more to Kal who was tap dancing for more.

"Hey poppet no more for Kal or you wont have any filling in yours, now we add sugar and Cinnamon" she smiled as Henry held out a table spook letting her add the dry ingredients before getting her down.

"Right now poppet go get Mummy’s nail varnishes...and the bottle of baby lotion...The pink bottle by the sink okay? can you do that for daddy?" she nodded and ran off making him call out for her to slow down. he moved the pot to the hob turning it on a low heat before moving to prepare the living room.

It took little sneaking but Henry smiled, he had gone all across the house with Paige's help collecting your favorite blankets and pillows piling them in the den where you had a larger tv with surround sound and got a film ready Tangled was decided for tonight....It was one of Paige's but he knew you liked it to and besides it was more about having one huge family cuddle then watching the film.

Finally Henry left the den walking to the back of the sofa to look at you still asleep good you looked like you needed it, he heard Paige’s foot steps quickly running out of the kitchen slapping the tiled floor

"Daddy? Daddy the apples!" oh fuck he quickly turned running to the kitchen collecting Paige by one arm hoisting her to his hip as he did they were just about to overflow he quickly slid it off the heat they must be ready by now.

"whoa! thank you poppet that could have been our snacks gone!" she peeked over the pot from on Henry's hip

"What do we do now Daddy?" he smiled and kissed her head

"To the apples or for the night?...Well the apples now have to cool so i am going to go draw a bubble bath and give you a bath and get your hair done then give mummy a bath to! then after we are going to sit and watch a flim while Daddy paints your nails and makes the toasties!" Paige smiled giggling looking forward to the night.

It didn't take long to draw the bath and wash Paige, she loved when Henry washed her hair nearly falling asleep as he spent al long as he could massaging her scalp, he actually had a hell of a job supporting her by the back of the neck as she lolled back and forth slipping around in the large tub. But he love this it was something he enjoyed since first bringing her home before long Paige was dry and wrapped up in her new fluffy onesie half asleep and playing in her room. Henry had cut up some fruit snacks and a babybell leaving Kal and Paige in her room to play with the promise of collecting her for movie night! Finally it came to you he took a moment to admire you then crouched next to you, he had covered you with a throw earlier. And thats how you woke.

You blinked bleary eyed feeling something was off and frowned. Then gasped quickly sitting up readying to hit and kick out at the man in front of you. Just as you did you blinked and realized it was your husband before you.

"Henry?! You-when did you? Oh god how long have I been asleep!?" You quickly moved to get up looking around frantically for Paige.  You winced holding your back. Fuck it hurt, not even just and ache it was a throbbing pull screaming with every movement.

Henry stood and moved his arms around you holding you still rubbing his heavy palms across your back soothing the ache. He moved closer pressing his face into your neck kissing you lightly then moved to whisper in your ear then tugged you close rocking slowly with you still massaging your tense back. He frowned he could feel the knots and hard muscles tensing and straining below his palms. A wave of guilt passed over him ,he should have been here! to help ease your pain! It was him who insisted on a second child and he felt as though he just abandoned you during the long months of uncomfortable pregnancy just to show up at the end and 'claim his prize' like a dead beat dad. Henry took a deep breath trying to push aside his guilt tonight was for you and Paige.

"Paige is fine, she's had her bath and is upstairs playing in her room with kal ready for bed, and you my absolute stunner of a wife have your own bath waiting~" you blinked as he pulled away and scooped you up with ease, he noticed to tense and struggle.

"No Henry put me down! I’m too big!" The words were out before you could stop them he stood still, hands gripping you tighter not willing to let you go.

"Babe even if you was pregnant with triplets, quintuplets! You my love will never ever be to big for a carry! Now come on, we are going to have a nice long chat about these new found thoughts whilst your in the bath!" You whined at the tone he sounded serious his deep voice almost scary. You cringed still trying to ease your weight off of him but he made quick work of scaling the stairs.

Once in the bathroom you were quickly deposited on the counter and Henry moved shutting the door then turned on you quickly drawing you into a deep needy kiss his tongue forcing his taste on your tongue as his hands roamed your swollen stomach caressing your unborn child then moved higher dragging your tshirt up over your stomach sighing when his hot palm met the skin of your stomach and he moved trailing kisses down the side of your neck leaving licks and nips along the way.

"H-Henry!...Hen-No stop we-you don't have to!". You pulled away gasping and whining trying to fight back the tears in your eyes so he wouldn't see just how far your self esteem had plummeted. He pulled back but you wouldn't meet his eyes and tried to shimmy off the counter, trying to use your huge stomach to push him back to slide own to your feet. He was having none of it you pressed forward and so did he meeting you in the middle, his strength jolted your knees apart and he stood between them and then closed them around his hips. You took a breath cringing knowing he must feel the extra padding on your soft thighs.

You twitched trying to pull back, to widen your legs so he wouldn't feel how fat you'd got but his huge hands held the outside of your legs keeping them clamped around him.

"I know I don't have to...But I want to! My fucking perfect woman! You are gorgeous how could I not want you?!" You squinted shaking your head at him..How? How could he? This was just that he felt obligated to kiss you and caress you in your state! He sighed and moved a hand to cup your chin.

"Love...Whatever she said is wrong...Yes I know...I face timed you and Paige answered you were asleep...I was hiding down the side of the house had a whole cheesy romeo and Juliet ensemble planned ...To beg for my queens forgiveness for being so late home...She told me everything." You sighed shaking your head that little girl really was to smart for her own good!

"H-henry you can't-I'm fat look at me?! I-I'm fat and hairy and just UGH! And I've got a shit load of new stretch marks and I...I've gained a lot of extra weight and my boobs are all veiny and ugly please stop lying to me- I know what your looking at! I see this fucking thing in the mirror each day!" Henry tugged your tshirt completely off grabbing our hips and dragged you forward forcing his erection to grind against you and dragged his teeth across your neck,  you jumped as he growled low into the flesh trapped in his jaws latching his hot mouth onto the throbbing vein below before sucking harshly, locking his teeth into the sensitive flesh. You whined trying to pull away he moved closer determined to devoure you, wanting to leave his mark across your skin he parted with soothing licks before groaning pleased with the dark mark forming on the sweet skin.

"GOOD! then you know how gorgeous and sexy and soft and glowing and scrumptious you look! My god woman your fucking perfection! A goddess who somehow I managed to trick into marrying me....Fuck your pregnant and healthy and sexy and mine! Mine!. My lover, best friend, soulmate ,better half .Mother to my children and most of all my incredibly beautiful wife! God if only you knew how fucking stunning you was! I'm trying so hard not to fuck you right now! if I didn't think it would hurt our son I'd already be in your fucking tight little cunt!" You flushed at his words each chipping away at the cold lead ball in your chest.

"Just what happened anyway? what has this fucking bitch said?" you gasped it was rare for Henry to swear well since Paige anyway.

"Henry it doesn't-" you shook your head trying to turn away from him but he was faster cupping. Both sides of your face drawing your gaze back to him he leaned in kissing you tenderly before pulling back resting his forehead to yours. His eyes ablaze, a swirling mix of anger ,love, desire but mostly worry.  He was worried for you anxious and rearing to go ready to fight away all your fears and doubts.

"Don't give me that shit woman! your sitting here shying away from me! the last time you did that was on our first night together! what ever happened has got to you, got to Paige and I'm not going to fucking stand here and let it eat away at you! Now tell me what happened...I can't fix it if I don't know love" you wavered he was right but ...Was retelling what happened really going to help? or would he just get angry? You hated to admit it but you found this pregnancy hard, things were different and you'd put on a few more pounds then you had with Paige and it was noticeable. you took a deep breath will he think your stupid? over reacting? you sighed recounting just this had all started.

You were self conscious and had managed to ignore it until...Yes until the woman at the nursery made a few comments a new woman-Abbey just enrolled her gremlin....and it was a gremlin! a nasty little girl Patty the same age as Paige who has already made her self the terror of the group being sent home three times in her first week for being mean and fighting the typical scratching biting toddler but more she was nearly four years old and already a bully but it wasn't really her fault she was just spoilt. Lets just say if Paige ever spoke to you the way this child spoke to her mother she'd be on the naughty step with a sore ass. But this woman was all smiles at first not really your cup of tea but you played nice being polite and friendly, you was an adult...Then she found out who you was. Paige had come around to the idea that her dad was superman after seeing him on some billboards and the tv adverts and suddenly just like that she switched sides and was team superman much to Henry's joy!

But it had caused a problem at the preschool. It was show and tell and Paige had went in wearing her supergirl tshirt and took a magazine with a double page spread on Henry's new film and told everyone that her daddy was superman, all of the children who had seen Henry at the nursery had gotten excited. The new girl had upset her calling her a liar and tore the book shouting the words 'He isn't really your daddy!'. That had really stuck with Paige and she had come out bawling her eyes out asking who her daddy was. You were fucking livid when her teacher came over and explained. Enter the little gremlins mother slinking up with a smirk.

"I'm sorry about Patty but she has a thing about liars she can't help herself" you blinked not believing what this bitch just said. You laughed and her face dropped.

"Excuse me?...My daughter isn't lying... That’s her father" she laughed condescending smoothing her brats pigtails.

"Yes I'm sure you've told her that! We single mothers have to tell them something about their daddies who skipped out on them, but superman is to far don't you think? Shes made a fool of herself in front of the class and will be teased for lying" you looked to Micah’s mother Fran who you were now close with and gaped. Fran shrugged

"I'm not a single mother" the woman snorted

"Well there’s no ring~"

"I’m pregnant it doesn't fit at the moment but I'm wearing it here" she had jeered at you as you pointed to the ring dangling from your necklace.

"Sorry if I don’t buy that...There’s nothing to be ashamed of I’m a single mother to but really lying to your own daughter very bad parenting don't you think?" You could have floored this cunt! You were seriously contemplating it. Fran stepped in to save the day...well save the woman from bitch slap galore!

"She's not a single mother and that is her husband...And I think as a new comer you should calm yourself down!a you and your daughter have been nothing but rude and out of line!" the woman scoffed at her then looked around.

"Excuse me! We have been nothing but fucking pleasant to you stuck up lot of ass wipes! My baby is a strong willed child and will grow up to be a strong minded self made women! and I apologize if I don't believe that a man like that would look twice at this fatty seriously pregnancy isn't a reason to let yourself go! Honestly why would anyone bother with her and take on someone else's kid...She really has you fooled?" Fran gasped

"Not fooled! We know because he is always here picking up Paige... and she isn't fat shes pregnant with his second! Maybe you should go and do some fucking homework before coming here and running your mouth! And teach your brat some manners whilst your at it!"

And that was all it took, the nasty woman had gone online and found photos and interviews, mainly one recent Ellen DeGeneres show that Paige gate crashed and from then on the woman had a grudge against you. Apparently her husband left her and signed away his parental rights away leaving her a bitter single mother and she had tried making friends with you because you never showed up with a man and had no ring leaving her to think you were a man hating single pringle yourself!. Not fucking likely! She became nasty and over the last two months her snide comments had chipped away at you. You knew it was some stupid playground bullshit, just a woman who never grew out of secondary school drama! But it had got to you.

Henry brought you out of your thoughts, you'd played the scenario over and over sometimes thinking of ways you could have changed the outcome, other times you were thinking of snippy comebacks and insults. Everything was to late though.

"Please love?...I know it has something to do with the new little girl at preschool, Paige has already asked me if I’m her real Father or not...So know what ever has happened was big" you looked at him shocked would he think you said something? put that in her head you panicked grabbing his hands praying he would listen before popping off at you.

"H-Henry I swear I didn't say anything! she- Abbey and her daughter have just had it in for us! Paige she took in a magazine- a superman vs batman ad....She was showing you off to her class she was so happy so so excited to let everyone know that you were superman!" Henry nodded now knowing that he was getting the full story.

"Yes I remember you saying she was doing that- but what happened? how did that turn into all this?" you swallowed recounting the first incident.

"Patty-The new girl is a bully-”

"Yes Paige said she kicks and scratches...Being sent home to?"

"Yeah shes a nasty little girl...Well Patty has never seen you before at nursery so..She called Paige a liar and got into two and eight with her...She said you wasn't her real Daddy...Then after school Miss Bou had to have a word with Abbey about Patty's behavior...Abbey took it wrong and accused me of lying to Paige about her Father and called me a bunch of names, Fran stepped in and snapped at her...Apparently cos I didn't have my ring on my finger Abbey though I was a single mother like her and got angry when-"

"When it turns out your not and are married to me?" you nodded cringing as you replayed the first incident in your head.

"Yeah...She continued telling Patty that Paige doesn't have a daddy and obviously kids talk..Paige got so upset I did sit her down and talk with her but it was...She needed to hear it from you I think" Henry nodded lips in a firm line

"Well she has, I will sit her down and have a more in depth talk......I'm fucking livid though...Not at you and don't you think that for a second, I'm angry that Paige is already dealing with this shit! and that you had to deal with it alone...I should have been here for you-"

"NO! no don't do that Henry it wouldn't have made a blind bit of difference...This? I would have brushed it off if it hadn't been the pregnancy hormones...But I'm fine your fine we are all okay-" Henry looked down and  pressed his hands to your stomach.

"Shh...I know...I know love I just wish you had told me! But you didn't want to worry me...I can understand that but I’m home now and tomorrow I will take care of it! But for now lets just relax and have a nice calm night hmm?" You took a deep breath feeling the tears well nodding.

You sighed looking down shit...your tits had fucking leaked again! That was the last straw, the flood gates opened you leaned to catch your face in your palms but Henry was quicker moving forward slipping his shoulder below your head letting you cry. "Oh honey whats wrong? Please we are fine, its okay whats? Oh-" you whined moving your hands to your boobs trying to hide the milk that was dripping adding to the wet patch on your shitty worn maternity bra.

"They- they wont stop oh god you must think this is gross!" Henry pulled back tutting shaking his head with a grin.

"Gross? The fact that your getting ready to feed our child? No love" he moved to unclip your bra taking it off he moved quickly to support your huge heavy breasts. You hissed as your breasts moved they were full and aching. Henry watched fascinated as your nipples leaked the tiny drops."Their sore huh?" You nodded whining as he lightly ran the pads of his thumbs over the nipples plucking them lightly encouraging them to release more making you weep in embarrassment.

"Well lets go time for a bath!"

Henry was still angry, at this woman for getting to you, at you for letting her words get to you but mostly he was angry at himself for not being here for his wife!. He made vows better or for worse! He had broke them plain and simple admittedly he had been working but you had needed him and he wasn't here he had been none the wiser. He hadn't been there to help you take care of yourself when you struggled to and that would eat away at him for a long time. But he had to push that aside you were still fragile your crying began to pick up again though whether it was from pain shame sadness or relief he couldn't tell. You cried into him not the pretty movie star pretty tears, the full on frustrated painful broken sobs that mad your face ache!

"I'm sor-rry I just..It's hard!...I-I know I'm b-bigger than last time...And then she said a-all those things and Paige was u-up-set and she started w-worrying...Then I c-could-dnt shave and the stretch ma-marks got worse and my back hurt so-o I stopped running and-and now I'm fat and ugly and I want this baby out! It hurts he is so heavy and I-I can't sleep or move or do anything! I just sit and eat! And you w-wont want me anymore! I c-can't do this any-anymore! And wh-when you finally come ho-home I’m fucking squirting milk all over you!" You broke down explaining through heartbreaking sobs and he just held you tight rubbing your back in slow circles.

"Don't be silly my love! Of course I want you! I love you! And I'm here now to fix everything I promise... come on my beautiful wife I hate seeing you like this! And don't worry about the milk it happens! I don't mind love shh shh....Come on come here... Here lets get you in here, have a nice long soak off with all this" he moved around you skillfully removing your leggings leaving butterfly kisses across your skin making you smile

"Please y/n I love you don't ever ever question that...you are everything to me! You complete me and have given me an incredible little girl a beautiful home and now this... A little boy of my own, you make each day worth waking up for, you have brightened up my whole life! And gave me my dream of having a family...I love you and nothing will ever change that, don't let some woman s jealousy hang over you" you smiled sheepishly his sweet words ,meant so much to you his sincerity and conviction was enough to snap you out of your funk.

"Oh? Is that a smile? Oh I think it is~ oh my! Don’t tell me that Henry struck again with his boyish charm?" You giggled at him but then without wasting time he hoisted you into the steaming water...you sighed and cringed as you leaned back expecting Henry to leave but he didn't.

Instead he moved to the side collecting your razor and shaving cream placing them on the counter by the sink then moved dipping a flannel into the hot water then wrung it out placing it on your aching breasts you sighed as the milk flowed free faster releasing the pressure.

"Thank you love that’s better already, I will call you to help me out-Henry? what are you-" you were confused when he turned around grabbing a few more things he peeked over his shoulder and wriggled his eyebrows at you

"Shh love~" he scolded then returned with a sugar honey bodyscrub and exfoliating mittens you chuckled as he snapped on the bright pink cheap mittens

"Now my love if you would just bend over and take a deep breath~" you laughed at him splashing some water at him.

"Henry?! you tit! don't make me laugh it hurts my back!" He rolled his eyes and freezes before quickly shrugging off his blazer and shirt staying there topless.

"Naked man servant enough for tonight?...Seeing as I probably shouldn't fuck you senseless~" You smiled shyly and peeked down at him licking your lips.

"Not sure your not naked yet" he smirked

"You naughty little minx!" he gasped before and made a show of slowly undoing his belt giving a seductive hip shimmy making you laugh out loud Henry trying to give a strip tease in bright pink exfoliating gloves was priceless. You flushed when finally he did a arms and legs spread tada! motion As he dropped his boxers and did a comical spin poseing his 'guns' for you like some fucking cheesy swimsuit model.

"Oh my god! Henry!?" He looked down and shrugged seeing his cock standing up right at the sight of you.

"What? Told you you were sexy I can't help it? I'm like a dog with a bone...Or should I say man with a boner?" You snorted at him falling into peels of laughter slipping lower into the water. He moved closer kneeling next to the tub and leaned over following your face peppering you with kisses you squirmed still giggling he just lowered his hands into the tub and held the back of your head holding you still sucking on your neck lathering you with soothing licks from his hot tongue.

"God I love you! your perfect and leave this woman to me~ I will set her straight myself, prove to everyone just how much I fucking crave you my perfect little wife!" you whined at him as he pressed froward capturing your lips in a heated kiss devouring you wholey making you finally melt into him, he smiled feeling you relax into his kiss feeling more relived now.

He pulled back and smirked as you blushed a dark red and gave him another chaste kiss feeling very silly abut your fears.

"Thank you love...I'm sorry I should have spoken to you earlier but ...I didn't want you to rush home and...Your work is important and I don't want to....You know" he nodded pressing his forehead to yours looking straight into your eyes.

"Zack would have understood that you needed me...but enough of that lets get you all clean and comfy! Paige and I have a nice night planned for the five of us" he said rubbing your bump that was peeking out of the water.

You smiled at him nodding and going to reach for the honey bodyscrub but Henry batted you away collecting it on his own glove covered palm and rubbed it through coating his hands then dipped a hand below the water and tugged your leg out of the tub to rest on the rim. You squeaked as the movement made you lean back against the slanted tub, you watched with weary eyes as he pressed small sweet kisses on your embarrassingly hair leg making you squirm but the man had a tight grip on your ankle.

He moved quickly rubbing the scrub in slow deep circles on your tense calf you moaned as he pressed the knots out of your skin moving in an unhurried manor up over your knee making you giggle as he ran his fingers on the underneath. He worked up your leg making you relax and close your eyes sighing. His motions were hard and soothing like a deep tissue massage then he lowered your leg rinsing it in the warm water and pulled your other leg out repeating the same process spoiling you, lavishing you with soft kisses and praising you whispering how sorry he was for not being here and how he was going to make this all up to you. finally both legs were washed and felt like jelly, he moved hissing as he seated his bare ass on the side of the tub reaching over he collected your razor and shaving cream and made quick work of collecting your leg carefully lathering it in the foam then began to drag the razor across you.

You didn't flinch or protest, you were thank full for it you needed a shave but hadn't really been able to reach, you'd been desperate enough even considering asking Paige but.....No. You loved when he did this...There was something strangely romantic in him taking care of you like this, just knowing that he didn't find your body gross sent little flutters in your chest. You watched silently enjoying the attention as he dragged the blade across your skin in long swipes concentrating on each drag of the blade then flicked it in the water until finally your leg was less werewolf more human.

"Woohoo look no cuts! lets go two for two shall we?" He lowered your leg back into the water with one parting open mouthed kiss on your bent knee making you giggle as he bit at it softly licking the now clean soft flesh. Sure enough he was quick to shave your other leg, avoiding cutting you which made him very proud of himself then he quickly pulled you down the length of the tub and began a soothing full body wash that just ended up being a massage. You both laughed as your son kicked out as his fathers hands each time he rubbed across the bump and soon it was a game, your baby trying to catch Henry with a kick. Finally though you were finished or you thought you was Henry was adamant about washing your hair you gave in dipping your hair into the water and lying back letting him scrub away the tension in your scalp using the lavender shampoo to help with the relaxing theme of the night. by the time you were squeaky clean you were half asleep his hands were heaven sent; like the rest of the man.

You felt the best you had in months not grotty, hairy and there was no pain anywhere just calm and relaxed so much so that you couldn't really move.

"You jumping in love?" you said over a yawn he shook his head slipping on his boxers you noticed that his erection was slowly going down. You were to far along and 'adult' time could start the labor...And as much as you couldn't wait for your baby boy to be here you wasn't going to risk anything, as far as you were concerned he could stay in your belly as long as he wanted just so long as he was a healthy baby on arrival.

Henry laughed as he carried you to your bed room patting you dry before wrangling you into your most comfortable fussy pajamas. you smiled at him lounging on the bed as he through on a t-shirt and bottoms of his own then helped you up knocking on Paige's room as you both walked past to go downstairs.

"Come on poppet! time for movie night!...Yes you to kal!" you smiled as Paige ran up to you hugging you tight and kissing your bump

"Are you better mummy?" you nodded to her

"Yes baby much better now...Daddy has taken care of me...But whats this about movie night? are we having snacks?"Paige smiled holding your hand and leaned back on her heels swinging happily.

"We-erm we got the apples!" Henry shushed her and quickly

"shh! that’s a surprise Paige-y" she quickly giggled as Henry hook an arm around her tummy picking her up and tickling her as he carried her down the stairs. You couldn't help the wide grin across your face. Who'd of thought just having a soothing bath and being taken care of by your man you'd snap out of your low mood. You followed as Henry directed you both into the den that was ready for a family movie night blankets and pillows galore almost like a huge slumber party. With in moments you and Paige were being treated to foot massages.

It was more comical then anything as Paige had never had a foot rub before and she was ticklish ,she caught Henry unawares and nearly took out his front teeth with a swift uncontrollable kick. He had retorted by quickly twisted around sitting on her legs and mercilessly tickled her feet until she was screaming and laughing you joined in blowing raspberries on her neck being careful of flailing limbs. She soon began whining and crying through her giggles and you both let up on her. she laid down picking through your nail varnish colours still wanting her her toes painted even thought she didn't want anyone to touch her feet...Which was going to be easy.

Henry flipped on the dvd to keep Paige occupied whilst  you on the other hand had the task of painting the giggling child's toenails a bright aqua blue with tiny metallic pieces. Thankfully though years of painting your own nails meant you had it done in under five minuets.

"Now Paige be careful they won't be dry until the end of the film okay poppet?" She nodded smiling wriggling her little toes. With Paige finally settled you could lay back and relax. Henry got to work digging his skilled fingers into the soles of your feet rubbing away months of tension you moaned and flopped back into the mountain of pillows this was heaven you could get used to this. Henry watched the tv with Paige still working on the soles of your feet adding more baby lotion every now and then just as you were falling back to sleep Paige piped up she was hungry yawning she scratched her head and crawled onto your legs moving to press the side of her face on your belly wiping her eyes after her bath and tickles she was a very tired little nugget.

"Daddy...Daddy I'm hungry when can we have apples?" Henry smiled at her leaning over to kiss her head

"I will got do it now....You wanna stay here with Mummy?" she looked drowsely from him to you and nodded letting her head fall again onto your tummy. You smiled and ran your fingers through her hair, once Henry left Kal was quick to steal his warm spot lying with his spine against your legs head resting on your crossed feet. you moved bundling up Paige putting a pillow under her hips so she wasn't so twisted up and watched the tv. after some cursing and crashes and one broken plate later Henry returned holding the three plates high so you couldn't see what he had made.

"Paige? Paige come on snack time nugget" at the word snack the toddler was up and at'em hands held out high for food. You giggled then gasped when you saw what he had been slaving away over.

"OH?! Henry I-you haven't done these for years!" he smiled smugly.

"I know...Paige helped me so they might be sweeter this time...she added to much cinnamon so we had to add more sugar to didn't we nugget?" she hummed not really listening picking up the sugar sprinkled toasty to take a big bite. you went to stop her not wanting her to burn her mouth but Henry stopped you.

"Love, its cool I did hers first and opened it to let out the steam...That nice poppet?" she grinned nodding swallowing her mouthful.

"I like it daddy...like 'donalds apple pie...Mummy can Daddy cook now...Daddy does sweets!" you chuckled "We will see he might have to when the baby is here" she smiled cutely then looked to the tv again munching on her toasty

"Henry...What did you mean? Earlier? about Abbey?" he just grinned and winked

"Like I said babe leave it with me...I won't be nasty I promise...I just gonna set her straight, tell her if it carries on I’m getting the police involved”

"The police-Henry no-” you began to protest but he held up his hand a stern look

"Its harassment! I’m not letting her get away with it....look I'm just gonna tell her to stay away if she doesn't then I'm taking things further...Just don't worry I'm here now trust me?" you gulped you knew there wasn't really anything you could do but it unnerved you he must have been so angry when Paige told him.

"I do...I just I don't want anything to get worse remember she will still be here when your away" he rolled his eyes and quickly moved in giving you a kiss on your cheek

"Babe with the way her kids going I doubt she will be here by the end of term" you sighed and nodded you couldn't argue that then dropped the topic and snuggled back in with kal between you feeding the bear some apple he had put at the side of his plate.

You quickly found yourself stretched out on the floor, Henry beside you with Paige laying across the both of you. She had eaten her toasty and crawled over you and flopped, facing the tv nibbling the tip of her thumb head on Henry's chest, tummy over kal and legs sprawled out over your lap. It was when you heard her soft snores you both decided it was time for bed,  Henry scooped up and tucked her in at you went to bed you where just drifting to sleep when Henry snuggled up behind you holding you tightly littering kisses to the back of your neck.

"I really do love you y/n I hope you know that" you hummed turning your head to him blinking tiredly.

"Yes I know...I love you to it...All this was just hormones I'm a weepy pregnant woman about to pop...So you gotta bare with me okay?" He smiled kissing your cheek  sweetly.

"A tired pregnant woman more like come on sleep we both need it love" and that’s what you did getting the best nights sleep in a long time.

The next morning you awoke to Henry placing a hot cup of coffee and then moving to your wardrobe pulling out your favorite knit jumper and maternity leggings.

"Come on love we have half an hour!" You sat up surprised to find no backache at all making you smile then you registered what he had said and scrambled throwing your legs over the side of the bed.

"What?! Oh fuck! Paige! is she up? Shit-" Henry moved handing you your coffee

"She is up and ready...Well she wants plaits and I can't I’m all thumbs so you have todo her hair but she is dressed fed and watered, her lunch is done and her bag ready!" You smiled at him

"Well look at you a domesticated kryptonian, you house trained to?~" he flushed and moved to tickle you stopping when you held up the steaming coffee

"Yeah yeah just you wait~.Well I'm going to go make sure Paige is playing nicely see you in fifteen? " you smiled nodding to him.

By the time you came downstairs you had about ten minuets to get going. Henry was busying himself around the house, just doing a general tidy up collecting Paige's toys that had been strewn across the kitchen and living room. You took a second to appreciate him, he had been so sweet only being home for..well not even a day and he had already brought the house back into order, he had taken care of you and Paige spoilt the both of you eased your silly fears and had your daughter ready for school before you were even out of bed...The man needs a medal...Or blowy or two now that you can do!

"Mummy! Mummy can I have braids? Daddy tried he can't he pulls and knots it!" You chuckled when she ran up to you holding her little box pf hair clips and ties. You nodded seeing Henry attempt being a loose....Is that a braid? Honestly your not sure what to call it but it was scruffy and bad and it would be a god send if you could get it out! you giggled and looked to a red faced Henry who had folded his arms watching embarrassed at the state he had left his little pumpkins hair in.

"What? I-I tried okay?"

"That you did and it was a valiant attempt...But seriously you need to get your ass on youtube love~" You moved quickly untangling the...what ever it was you had to use a lot of de tangling spritz but finally Paige had two neat braids and soon you were all out the door.

It wasn't until half way to the playschool Henry had remembered he had to pop to the shop something about getting bacon and more milk. You nodded to him, as he gave you kals lead saying he would meet up with you at the school. You and Paige continued to the school waiting t the gates with Fran and Micah.

"She ain't her yet then?" You asked Fran nodded

"Yeah, Patty is already on one, fucking little heathen just bit Rose look"

"Mummy whats a heathen?"you gave Tran a look giggling out of the side of her mouth you looked and sure enough Rose was screaming holding her cheek crying into her mothers legs as her mother was screaming at Abbey who was coddling Patty shouting at everyone who would listen that patty had a right to stick up for herself. You rolled your eyes at the scene this child was just feral! And the mother no better."Nothing baby...Why don't you go see? Rose look shes sad" she nodded and ran off into the playground pulling rose away from her mother with Micah and a few of the other kids You shushed Kal as he barked at all the excitement you knew he wanted to go see the crying little girl he was attached to these kids, as far as the bear was concerned they were all his!.

Once Paige was out of ear shot Fran spoke up.

"Shes only here because they were kicked out of magpies and dee dee's" you looked to Fran what? She nodded to them subtly.

"Who? Patty?"

"Yeah...Abbey came in to the surgery, wanting to be tested for adhd...Shes convinced thats the problem apparently Patty was kicked out of magpies for fighting and then dee dee's...The kid needed stitches she bit a chunk out of his thigh...She was supposed to go to one of those playschools for the challenging children, you know? with the anger management and quiet times...Got to come here though cos Abbey said its adhd but obviously we cant test for it until shes older she was told to get Patty to counselling but refused....Its not though, I've see adhd and that is just a badly behaved little girl who in my opinion needs a smacked ass and a time out." You agreed laughing just as Abbey came strutting past with Patty...looks like she's being sent home again.

"Don’t you fucking judge me whore! And what have I said about that fucking mutt! Keep it away from the school or I will have it put down!-"

"OH NO YOU FUCKING WONT!" oh fuck she didn't...Not infront of Henry You froze as Henry shouted loud and clear, the playground got silent. Noone had ever heard Henry raise his voice even the children stopped to stare whispering about Superman.Paige held onto Rose

"I-its okay daddy isn’t mad at us...I think?" As far as Henry was concerned it was bad enough to upset you and Paige but threatening Kal's life fuck no!

Abbey faltered taking a step back at the frightening scowl on his face, in one hand he had a bag of shopping the other was a small bouquet of flowers. Your heart melted a little already knowing the lillys; your favorite flowers were for you. But you shook your head moving to him as he squared up to Abbey, he just wedged himself between you and the other woman shushing Kal. who was yipping anxiously about you both.

"So your Abbey and Patty? Well I'd like a word with you if you don't mind..." his voice was a growl you'd never herd before he definetly channeling some inner dark fucking protective alpha shit. I mean fuck he could so play a villain?  where was your soft boy?.

"Mummy? Why is superman here...Is he really Paiges daddy-"

"Oh hush Patty of course he isnt-"

"Thats what I wanted to talk about" she looked to Henry again and stuttered

"W-what I-" You gulped as he gained on you both Kal was still pulling to go see the upset toddler...he was a nanny dog.

"I’m warning you this once.Stay away from my family, I mean it you've caused enough upset and I'm home now and noone...And I mean noone fucking upsets my wife and daughter! She might take it but I'm not. You've upset my heavily pregnant wife ,confused my daughter and now I hear you threatening my dog? You know what you've done is slander...Causing serious stress to a pregnant woman can been seen as intent to harm her and MY baby and is also harassment...I'm giving you this one chance you and your daughter stay away or I will come down on you like a tonne of bricks and have you in court before you know it" your heart fluttered as Henry came to a stop beside you.

"W-what I haven't done anything! Neither has Patty! We havent done anything! I don't know what your fucking wife has said but-"

"You've been running your mouth, I just heard it myself like I said I will go to the courts and get the police involved, its harassment, intent to harm and slander,  which being in the public eye we take very seriously, if I hear any more about it I will be on to my lawyers quicker then you would believe. I'v said my piece. Stay away from my family." He turned his back on her and smiled down at you you glanced between him and her.

“Henry- what are-?” he placed his hand on your arm soothing you

"No-Love I'm sorry I told you...I'm not putting up with it...I will look into injunctions today" that caught the womans attention and she flipped her lid.

"INJUNCTIONS! HOW WILL THAT WORK PATTY GOES TO THE SAME SCHOOL!? WHAT YOU THINK I WILL TAKE MY DAUGHTER OUT?" Henry looked over his shoulder at the woman.

"No honestly I think she will be excluded by that point...Biting and attacking the other kids? I will tell you one thing though Patty ever attacks Paige I will personally see to you both being thrown out on your ass! All these kids here have a right to be safe in school and by law the staff here have a right to Exclude any children who harm the other kids." Abbey huffed eyes blazing

"You think you can do that-"

"Not alone but we do have a pta...One vote and we can demand Patty's removal from the class for the safety and well being of the other children " she screamed angry and turned  screeched and walked of dragging Patty along behinde her.

"B-but Mummy you said he wasn't her daddy! You said-"

"Oh will you shut up! You've caused enough trouble for one day Patricia!" Henry smirked after the woman and turned to you handing you the small bouquet of flowers.

"And these are for you my love~" you blushed sniffing them softly thanking him you felt giddy. Suddenly before you could say anything the other kids all gathered round each taking turns giving Kal his morning cuddles then asking Henry questions about being superman squealing when he played along and admitted it but made them promise to keep it a secret. You chuckled as he answered them each the the best of his ability getting stumped a few times dodging a few bullets here and there. It wasn't long before Miss Bou had to round up the kids for class and you were on your way home after getting a few 'well done' comments from some of the other mothers.

"Soo babe....Me thinks you deserve a little reward for all your hard work..."

"Hard work? babe I just-"you rolled your eyes hooking an arm around his leaning against him breathing him in.

"yes hard work...Putting me straight last night looking after me and Paige, coffee in bed and you tidied the house and now this...Sorting out the vindictive woman and her kid- which by the way was a complete turn on watching you go all alpha scary daddy!UGH fuck my panties are wet" he took a deep breath willing himself to calm down.

"Ugh woman don't even go there you know we can't-" you kissed his shoulder and interrupted him.

"Ah ah~ no your right we can't have full on sex...But there are other ways for me to worship my husband~" he stopped and blinked confused then his face lit up

"what do you OH Fuck!...Am I getting a blowy?" You hummed pretending to think about it.

"Well No" his face dropped and he whined his hopes shattered

"Then what-" you smiled cheekily up at him

"Think Daddy earned more then one blowy Baby~" his face lit up like Christmas and slung his arm around your shoulder holding you tight.

"Oh fuck yes! Come on hurry up~ quickly Kal mush! pull mummy faster! come on woman get a waddle on I need to be in your mouth like fucking yesterday!" You giggled as he ushered you home faster eager to have his well earned reward you laughed knowing that today was going to be a good day.

[clairen45]

The Bridge Trope in Star Wars and what it may mean for IX

Besides being iconic markers in our daily lives, bridges are an awesome symbol:

transition and a boundary between sky and earth, life and death, real and imaginary, mortal and immortal,  good and evil, civilization and the wilderness,rich and poor, old and new

marking both a connection and a separation through time and space, between people, between places

Which is why, they are so easily used in stories as a decisive step in a hero’s journey, the Rubicon moment, the ultimate test, when through wit, trick, or strength, a bridgekeeper must be defeated. Let’s say it is a hero’s journey and fairy tale classic.

Add to that the fact that bridges are quite the war movie cliché, they are obvious landmarks to destroy, and vital targets to control. Destroying a bridge often means isolating and weakening the enemy, depriving it from communication and food, water, or medical supplies.

So, of course, we get to meet the bridge trope again and again in Star Wars. And, more often than not, the bridges we get are bridges of Death. From the Phantom Menace’s Duel of the Fates

To Han’s death in The Force Awakens.

It is actually fitting to say that both scenes constitute an interesting framing for the Skywalker saga. Duel of the Fates is a very apt name for the beginning of the saga. Remember that Anakin’s name is etymologically “Ananke”, that is to say Fate, Destiny. Anakin’s fate is in the balance there, and the end result of who gets to become his Master and teaching him about the Force is key. Had Qui Gon lived, possibly, there would not have been any Vader. As for, Han’s death in TFA, the constant play of words between sun and son, and the not so subtle imagery of light and darkness, is supposedly all about Kylo’s fate. If Qui Gon’s death is possibly the first step towards the fate that will turn sweet lovable Anakin munchkin into big bad Vader, Han’s death is the counterpart of this scene, thus the first step towards big bad Kylo turning eventually into lovable Ben Solo. And just as it took three movies to realize the Fate of Anakin, it will take three movies to realize the Fate of Ben Solo. But I digress. Or not.

Because both stories, which interact like mirror images of each other, are perfectly hinged around two other crucial bridge scenes. One in ESB. And one in ROTJ. You know what I’m talking about, right?

And these two are also counterparts. ESB’s bridge scene is Luke’s symbolic death scene: learning the truth about his father, and losing his hand, he would rather choose death and commit suicide. ROTJ’s bridge scene is Vader’s death and Anakin’s redemption, with Luke accepting the truth, Vader losing a hand, and choosing to save his son’s life. Even the placement of the actors emphasize this idea of mirror image. So Luke gets his Troll Bridge twice: he fails the test the first one, falling to the chasm and falling apart, and succeeds the second time around. Doing what? Throwing away his saber. Choosing love. Refusing to kill.

But I would also like to stress out that, from a certain point of view, Luke is not the only one who gets tested there on the Troll Bridge. Anakin, just like his son, also fails the first test and passes the second. In ESB, he has little to no love to offer and tempt Luke to his side: he offers the vague promises of the power of the dark side and ruling the galaxy together (which didn’t work with Padmé either). In effect, he is selfish, abusive, scarring his son physically and psychologically, and does not seem too distressed when Luke lets go and falls “presumably” to his death. In ROTJ, he chooses the losing side, standing against the Emperor to save his son’s life, which he knows, will eventually cost him his life. Thus, he is showing empathy and remorse, and saves Luke through a selfless act of love.

Yep, that is what the OT is about.

And, arguably, these two scenes constitute the very axis around which the other two trilogies are built. Hence my first “digression”.

It is also very interesting to note that in the four cases exemplified so far, the “bridges” in question are seemingly “reactor cores”, excuse my tech ignorance. These scenes are never about bridges out in the open, over a river, connecting two shores. They are always played out over a chasm, surrounded with energy fields, in dark environments with a possible fall into a bottomless abyss... Two possible interpretations:

because they are battle of the brains, moral battle of good versus evil within oneself. Inner battles. Think grey cells, cerebellum connections, as a map for these duels.

because they are battle of the heart. Issues of love. “core”

Honestly, I think they both go together!

Symbolically, they are your typical “choose the right path” bridges, the life and death, good vs evil bridges.

The many bridges of Luke

If you actually consider the OT, Luke’s journey is very much rhythmed by a series of bridges. Which might seem ironic for a boy coming from a desert planet with no water, and thus, no use or concept for bridges (besides rocky arch formation such as we see during the pod race in PM). But consider the last name GL decided to give him: SKYWALKER. That was not the orginial name he had chosen, right, since in first drafts Luke was called “Starkiller”. Consider then what a huge difference it makes when you move from a very martial moniker “Star/killer”, which is all about destroying life and light (and Luke actually comes from “light” etymologically speaking) to choose something that means: the one that walks the skies. Not flies. WALKS. And if you walk the skies, chances are you are walking on a bridge of some kind (like mythological rainbow bridges). Crossing a bridge is very much akin to walking the sky: you are suspended between heaven and earth. So even the name GL chose for his star family is all about “walking” on bridges.

The “bridge” moment in ANH is rather brief, but quite interesting. It is actually the “NO BRIDGE” moment, the one when Luke and the Princess find themselves locked out with no crossing, and stormtroopers shooting at them. This moment:

What does it reveal about Luke? His ingenuity, since he uses his farmboy utility belt to cross the bridge, but then also his instincts, the fact that he can rely on his roots (what he learned as a farmboy), his audacity, his ability to take a leap of faith (something that will play out later in his relationship with his father). But it also sets him apart as a different kind of hero. The NOT MY LUKE people should really pay attention to these details. Sure, he plays the hero, saves the damsel and everything, but in this scene they work together, she also gets to protect them, he trusts her with defending them, she is the one giving him a kiss for luck. This is very positive masculinity. Heroic, but not pushy. Manly, but respectful of women. Physical but also using his brain. Luke is such a dear.

In ESB, the big bridge moment is the one I already referred to. The moment of truth. Having these two characters on a bridge is very clever of course. It’s all about meeting in the middle. A bridge is by essence a balancing act. Can they meet halfway or will they cut all connections? Can opposites reconcile? Will they connect/reconnect? What better way to talk about human emotion and love than put them on a bridge, the very metaphor for communication, leap of faith, and the possible danger of reaching out to the other with your feelings?

But ROTJ goes even further with the bridge metaphor. Going with this when Luke reveals the truth to Leia...

To carry on with Leia and Han, where Han shows more of his emotions ans proves how supportive and selfless he can be when he is just there to comfort her in the end, putting away his jealousy and self-doubts:

Followed with this, for Luke and Vader’s first meeting since ESB when Luke calls him “father” for the first time and tries to bring him back:

To conclude with the bridge sequence already mentioned when Vader chooses to be Anakin all over again.

WOW.

And where does it all take Luke? To a water planet with NO bridges. Seriously. When VII opens, Luke has chosen to sever, metaphorically speaking, all the links to others. As if he had chosen to destroy every bridge that could connect him to Leia and the rest of the world. And when we see him going about the island, there are no bridges. He jumps from one cliff to the other. Interesting thing is on The Art of The Last Jedi you get to see some of the art concepts that they had for Ahch-To that included a lot of variation on bridges:

But eventually they went for the very design that removed any bridge from the place that Luke has chosen to spend the remaining days of his life until his death. Which is, I must say, a very good choice. He disconnected himself from the Force, he disconnected from people he loved not telling them where he hid, it made absolutely no sense to put him on a place that was covered with bridges. The bridges were meant to be burned.

That is... until one very last moment. Which is the perfect segway into my next chapter... Until the end. When he projects himself for one final face-off with his nephew. And that is a big bridge metaphor about reaching out across the stars. And we know that when Luke is on a bridge with someone he loves, this doesn’t mean harm or spite or revenge. Or even fighting. Bridges in SW are not so much about fancy duels as they are about love. Yep, even in PM. There is the love that Obi-Wan (yes, even a Jedi) feels for his master, and the need to extend and take care of a little boy that is all alone in this galaxy. A leap of faith. Love. Which means...

The ST is about crossing that bridge

Yes, there are bridges in the ST. And how Kylo and Rey are going to be able to cross over and meet each other. Let me explain. This happens at the end of VII:

Visually, it tells us that there seems to be no possible bridge between the two characters. Yet, the whole point is that they keep on looking towards each other. The bridge,aka the connection, is their eyes (mirrors of the soul yadiyada). And sure enough, comes VIII, and the bridge is there. WTF, will you say? What bridge are you raving about. Well... that one...

The Force bond.

And how do I presume calling this a bridge? Because...

It was I who bridged your minds

Interesting choice of words. But there it is. Put it as plainly and simply as you possibly can. The Force bond is a bridge, a spiritual bridge between Kylo and Rey. That’s quite something, right?

Which means that, there may be some physical crossing of some kind in IX. Now, I don’t want to be presumptuous and declare for sure, but it would seem like a logical concept. And on Vic Mahoney’s moodboard...on the left, some of the pictures seem very bridgelike...

And that’s also where I want to bring in that clever little TV kid show called Star Wars Rebels.

Take it to the Bridge

So Star Wars Rebels came before the release of TFA, in 2014, merely two years after Disney bought LF and therefore all the rights to Star Wars. Let’s look at what they did there and let’s wonder why. I don’t think that it was a random move on their part. They could, after all, have imagined something that took place right before TFA, or come up with the many adventures of Luke and the gang, or even spend more time on the Clone Wars, or go way back in the Old Republic. But no 14 years after ROTS, 5 years before ANH, is the time they chose. And came up with a totally new gang we had never heard of. Except that... well... the new gang got to meet A LOT of familiar faces. From all over the place: Hondo, Rex, Ahsoka, Vader, Leia, Mon Mothma, Bail Organa, Obi-Wan, Darth Maul, Yoda, Lando, C3P0 and R2, Palpatine, just to name a few... The point is that they get to meet people from the PT AND people from the OT. Thus (you know where this is going) bridging story lines. And, surprise surprise, what special name did they choose for their hero? Ezra Bridger. Gosh, that’s not even subtle, there. And by the way, what does Ezra mean? Helper. So Ezra helps bridging... aka, Star Wars Rebels helps bridging, connecting, if you will storylines. Towards a logical conclusion. And what is this conclusion, pray? The ST of course. And who stands on the bridge? Kylo and Rey.

Even better, what particular storyline did they preciously choose to keep to conclude this new Star Wars story:

the return of the Mortis Arc, balance

the World between worlds, and its very specific bridges that cross through time and space, and the possibility to alter the past/future, plus bringing back loved ones

looking for knowledge (last time I checked it was not so much about knowledge in the PT and OT). But Ezra’s story is all about knowledge.

love and sacrifice, saving the people you love (Ahsoka, Kanan, Ezra), and, come on, Hera and Kanan’s baby (by the way, Kanan is very reminiscent of Canaan, the Promised Land, so keep the prophetic aspect in mind)

Again, how will it play out in IX? I have some ideas but I really can’t tell whether it will show up or not. There have been rumors about an artifact (very SW Rebels) that would require both Kylo and Rey’s powers. So knowledge. So possibly with notions of Mortis implied in there (balance). Love, sacrifice, we have discussed a lot. Remain the bridges. I can totally envision an important scene taking place on a bridge, with Kylo and Rey embracing, or running to each other, or holding hands while everything else around them crumbles. I can also imagine a bridge playing out with an intimate scene as we got in ROTJ in the Ewok village, something akin to the terrace where Anakin and Padmé first kiss on Naboo and finally get married. Again, the film has already been shot. So too late for that already and there’s a fat chance that it won’t even happen. But since we got a bridge of death in VII with Han’s death, we need a bridge of light.

Which might just turn out to be the symbolic bridge of Rey and Kylo coming together and finally uniting the light and the dark sides...

Leaving Simon and Garfunkel’s Bridge Over Troubled Water behind as a great Reylo vibe. Seriously. Reylo vibe, guys!!!!

When you're weary, feeling small When tears are in your eyes, I'll dry them all I'm on your side, oh, when times get rough And friends just can't be found Like a bridge over troubled water I will lay me down

When you're down and out When you're on the street When evening falls so hard I will comfort you I'll take your part, oh, when darkness comes And pain is all around Like a bridge over troubled water I will lay me down

[the-desolated-quill]

Star Wars: The Last Jedi - Quill’s Quickies (No Spoilers)

This year, Star Wars has been almost mired in controversy. From the loot box controversy in EA’s Star Wars Battlefront II to the noticeable lack of non-white characters in The Last Jedi’s marketing. Rian Johnson making a total prat of himself by claiming that Kylo Ren is a dual protagonist with Rey, and now the reviews are in it turns out Episode 8 is the most divisive movie in the whole franchise, with critics clambering over themselves to praise the movie for its ‘bold new direction’ while the fans decry it as the arse-raping of their collective childhood. On the whole, I’d say this has been a complete and total cock-up.

I had no idea what to expect going in. I’m sure you all know how lukewarm I was about The Force Awakens. It didn’t surprise me in the slightest that the critics were praising the hell out of The Last Jedi considering they were doing the same thing with the previous film, which in my opinion was mediocre at best. The fan reaction surprised me. After all the blind (and arguably undeserved) praise The Force Awakens got, if even the fans are struggling to find good things to say about this movie, something must have gone spectacularly wrong.

So what did I, diehard Star Wars fan and professional arsehole, think of The Last Jedi? Well honestly I’m disappointed I didn’t hate it more. Truthfully I liked this movie about as much as I liked The Force Awakens, which is to say not very much. Like The Force Awakens, it’s a competently made movie and it’s possible to derive some enjoyment from it if you switch your brain off for two and half hours, but otherwise it’s just yet another tired retread of the original Star Wars movies that brings absolutely nothing new to the table. Not for the first time, I feel a real disconnect from the rest of the Star Wars community here. I have no idea why the critics are praising this movie for being a game changer because there’s genuinely nothing very revolutionary or groundbreaking going on here, and I’m confused as to why the fans have chosen to fling their bile and venom at a movie that, in my opinion, is the very definition of average. I mean sure, The Last Jedi isn’t very good and there were some bits that did kind of annoy me, but there’s nothing about it that’s outrageously offensive as far as I can see.

Let’s start with the things I liked. The biggest, shiniest gold star has to go to Finn. He was quite possibly the only new character I was in any way invested in last time around, and he’s just as brilliant here. We see him slowly embrace his new role as a hero of the Resistance and we also see him get the chance to stick it to his First Order oppressors, which I thought was quite emotionally satisfying. He’s joined by Rose, played by Kelly Marie Tran, who I thought was a nice addition to the cast and who undergoes the traditional everyman turned hero journey. I really liked her relationship with Finn and their scenes together are by far the highlight of the film, which makes their subtle erasure from the Star Wars marketing campaign all the more offensive to me because, as far as I’m concerned, they’re the main characters. They were the most developed, the ones I was most invested in, the only ones that actually grow and develop over the course of the film and who pretty much drive the plot.

The other thing I liked (and I can’t believe I’m saying this) is Kylo Ren. I really wasn’t impressed with him in The Force Awakens because he was pretty much just a shitty rehash of Darth Vader, and I mentioned in my review at the time how it might have been better to embrace the more weaselly and slightly pathetic nature of the character to help better distinguish him and give him his own identity. So I’m extremely pleased to see that’s exactly what this film does and it’s great. There’s no pretence anymore. Kylo Ren is this spoilt, impotent man-child that desperately craves power and attention, but doesn’t really know what he wants to do with it, and that’s glorious. That’s just the burst of inspiration the character sorely needed and Adam Driver does a great job with this new material. I’m actually looking forward to seeing where he goes in the next film and if they handle it well, he should make for a very unique antagonist (that’s antagonist Rian Johnson. AN-TAG-GON-NIST).

It’s just a pity that in order to prop up Kylo Ren, Rian Johnson felt the need to completely warp Luke Skywalker’s character into something wholly unrecognisable.

Yes now we come to the bad stuff, and there’s quite a bit. My main gripe is with Luke’s characterisation. In order to justify a lot of the plot, they have to make Luke this cynical halfwit and there are loads of moments where he says or does something that just simply doesn’t ring true with what we already know about him. His reasons for his exile are utterly out of character for one thing and his reasons behind his provocative statement that ‘it’s time for the Jedi to end’ are even more ludicrous. What’s worse is that the majority of the movie is dedicated to Rey trying to persuade Luke to come out of exile and rejoin the fight. Remember the scene in The Empire Strikes Back when Luke tries to persuade Yoda to train him? Well imagine that dragged out for an hour and a half. That’s pretty much the movie in the nutshell. I think that’s part of the reason why I loved Finn and Rose so much. Because it was a blessed relief to get off that fucking island for a while. There were several moments where I came close to dozing off.

I’m sure it’s no secret to anyone by this point that Rian Johnson has played pretty fast and loose with the Star Wars canon. Luke’s odd characterisation is one example. There are a few others. None of them truly insulting in my opinion. But the most notorious is a scene involving Leia, which I will hereby refer to as ‘The Scene.’ This got a lot of Star Wars fans riled up, but I personally thought it was absolutely hysterical just because of how random and idiotically daft it was. I’m not going to tell you what happened in ‘The Scene’ because this is a non-spoiler review. All I can say is you’ll know it when you see it.

Of course this was Carrie Fisher’s last film before her untimely death and that’s incredibly sad. Does The Last Jedi offer a fitting tribute to Princess/General/Queen (she’s a a Queen in my eyes) Leia Organa? Not really. In fact, outside of ‘The Scene’, Leia doesn’t really do anything worthy of comment. Some say she was mischaracterised too, but I don’t think so. At a push, I could see Leia doing some of the things she does. I just wish Fisher could have been given something with actual substance.

My views on Poe and Rey remain virtually unchanged. Poe Dameron is still a one dimensional cardboard cutout and I’m still continuously baffled as to why people like him so much. He doesn’t have a character. We’re two movies in and we still haven’t learnt a single sodding thing about him. Frankly I’ve seen fossils with more life in them. Rey meanwhile is still quite possibly one of the blandest protagonists I’ve ever seen. I’m struggling to find any reason to actually give a shit about her. Why should I be invested in her Jedi training? Why does she even need Jedi training when she seems capable of pulling any random superpower out of her arse at the convenience of the plot? At no point have these films ever given me a reason to care about her. Maybe if they focused more on her looking for her missing parents, I might be slightly more invested. And that’s another thing. In The Force Awakens, her missing parents are basically used as sequel bait. Here (without giving too much away) they’re pretty much just swept under the carpet entirely, which begs the question why was JJ Abrams wasting our time with them in the first fucking place (yes I am blaming JJ Abrams instead of Rian Johnson because Abrams was the one that actually came up with this shit and it’s very much reminiscent of his bullshit ‘mystery box’. The principle where an audience are naturally drawn to some big unknown or mystery and that he frequently utilises in his projects, most notably the TV series Lost. What he often forgets however is that good mysteries tend to have a satisfying fucking answer at the end).

And that’s pretty much all I have to say really. No doubt some of you are disappointed I haven’t quite given The Last Jedi the vengeful pummelling you’ve come to expect from me, but honestly I can’t work up the energy to get properly angry at it, and that’s largely because I’m past caring about this sequel trilogy. I think I’ve made my views on the sequel trilogy quite clear by now (that they’re a soulless cash grab concocted by studio execs who wouldn’t recognise a decent script if one jumped up and bit them on the arse) and I think it’s my total lack of interest that kind of shields me from some of Rian Johnson’s ‘creative’ decisions. These movies don’t count as far as I’m concerned. I’m not especially bothered by Johnson’s ‘reimagining’ and there’s nothing truly terrible going on here. The only crime The Last Jedi is really guilty of in my opinion is that there’s large swathes of it that are just really, really boring. And the main reason for this (apart from the obscenely long running time and a plot that drags its feet) is because, like with The Force Awakens, a lot of this stuff has been done before and done better in the original trilogy. While The Force Awakens ripped off A New Hope and a few elements from The Empire Strikes Back, The Last Jedi rips off The Empire Strikes Back and a few elements from Return Of The Jedi. What makes it slightly more egregious here is that The Empire Strikes Back and Return Of The Jedi are both very emotionally charged stories that rely on three films’ worth of character development and buildup to make an impact, whereas The Last Jedi just blunders in, trying to replicate these emotional moments, but fails to recognise what made them so powerful to begin with and hasn’t done any of the legwork to make us feel truly invested in what’s going on, and thus it has all the impact of a feather duster.

So that’s The Last Jedi. A pointless and mediocre middle chapter to what has so far been a pointless and mediocre trilogy. The one bright side is that now it appears they’ve finally rehashed all they can from the original trilogy, there’s a chance we might finally get to see some original ideas in Episode 9. Unless they’re planning to ripoff the prequels next. In which case Disney must be more creatively bankrupt than I thought.

[youngerdrgrey]

outtakes from the Bordelon fairytale // a queen sugar fanfic

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written for day 21 of 30 x 31 writing challenge; prompt: fairytale au (each taken as separate words in this case)

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about... Sure, Charley and Davis started off with a fairytale, but they forgot about how awful sequels turned out to be. The couple in the first breaks up, and whoever does the comforting tends to be the new prince by book's end. Or, princess, as the case may be. 

// or, the time Lena helps Charley tackle the truth about Davis' infidelity. + read on ao3

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i. the curse is broken, the truth revealed

"You're a liar, Davis! LIAR! WHAT DID YOU DO!?"

Security carries Charley the whole of the way off the court and out through the players' entrance. The second those doors close, she rounds at them. Snaps, "Get Micah!" Her teeth slam so hard they click. And she repeats it until they go back and get her son. "Get Micah! Bring him to me. You want me to go get him? I'll go back out there. Get me Micah!"

But Micah rushes through the doors before they can even go. And in the background, as he runs to her with his arms outstretched, she sees Davis, shifting his weight from one side to the other, scratching at his hand like he can't quite understand how they got here.

"Mom!"

Micah barrels into her. She stumbles back, but her grip on him stays firm. Tight around his shaking shoulders even as hers do the same. Her face finds the crook of his neck, and she scratches at his arms, his back, whatever she can get to. 

"I got you. It's okay. I got you." The doors to the players' entrance swing closed, but the rush of the crowd keeps roaring on the other side. The chanting, the boos. Charley pulls back enough to look down at Micah. Squeezes her arms around him. "Let's go."

She wants to say home, but the word catches in her throat. She can't dislodge it and hold back her tears at the same time, so she doesn't say anything else. Not until they're in the parking garage and she tells him to just turn his phone off. They're not answering any questions today, not from anyone.

(She winds up with over forty missed calls. From Davis, Miriam, Lena, even Nova's broken their silence to check on her.

Nova sounds lost though, a little uncomfortable, like the words strain against the veins in her neck as she says them. "Hey sis, just checking in. I'm not gon' pretend I'm not calling because of the Davis of it all, but if you need to talk about anything, my ringer's up."

The phone autoplays the next message. Davis, with his shaking voice. "Baby, please, talk to me. I didn't do this. I did not rape her, Charley. I swear to you. Please, baby, call me back."

And Micah must hear the message, or must feel the tension in her jaw and the rest of her. He takes her hand in his and doesn't let go until they get home.)

/

ii. a kind helper appears

Lena shows up at the house with a Trader Joe's bag filled with margarita supplies. Charley bites down the joke about Lena's past as a bartender and steps aside to let her in.

"I didn't expect to see you," Charley says. She could've added a classifier, like so soon or in person, but honestly they all apply. She and Lena aren't exactly unplanned drinking kind of friends, especially not in times of trouble, but here they are, bottles clinking as Lena toes off her heels near the shoe rack.

"I got sick of waiting for you to leave the house." Lena throws a glance Charley's way, and Charley has to circle her jaw to keep from snapping back. It's not an unwarranted comment anyway. Charley's left the house once in the whole of the last three days, and it was just to help Micah get back through the media chaos when he'd gone to get his girlfriend.

It's not like the outside world has much for her right now. Micah's here, her family's safe in their part of the country, and Davis.... She's got his false apologies and weak explanations coming from all directions now. He'd sent her an email because she'd taken her phone and hid out in their wine cellar for the whole time he was home. A few replies later, and they'd agreed he could stay in the guest room on the other side of the house and that he was not to speak to her for any reason right now. He was to ignore any and every reporter with a question about his marriage, his family, and his compliance in the rape of the twenty-three year old accuser. Oh, and if he so much as thought about going into their bedroom, she'd be taking Micah and going to stay with her Aunt Violet until this whole situation died down.

Lena takes in the house from her spot. Most of their walls are glass, so it's pretty easy to tell that no one else is wandering around. "I take it Davis isn't staying at the house."

Rather than answering, Charley leads the way towards the kitchen. "Is Felix?"

Lena laughs. "If I kicked him out every time he did something stupid, I'd be living alone." She sets the bag on the counter and pulls out ingredients. A small bag of limes, tequila, a trashy gossip magazine. She holds that last one. "I figured we could laugh about it after a few drinks."

The cover's a shot of Charley on the court, arms and legs thrashing to hit Davis, while he gives her that same confused look he's been wearing for a week now. She doesn't need to ask to know that her claims of respectability are gone with that. She plucks the magazine from Lena's hand anyway.

"Maybe more than a few."

"Then let's get to it. I know you'd prefer the juice be fresh, so, what can I use to squeeze these?" She starts pulling open drawers before the question's even out of her mouth. Charley watches, but there's no point in answering when Lena's only one drawer away from finding the strainer herself. And Lena hoists it up triumphantly once she does find it. She catches herself right after and sends a more restrained smile towards Charley. At least that hasn't changed.

The other girls -- other wives with husbands fresh out of college and no experience at navigating this level of attention -- they all watch Charley like she's their choreographer, going over the motions too quick for the beginners and just fast enough that the eager ones can shine. Lena shines, when she wants to, and she'd been one of the first to stand beside her husband once Charley gave the marching order. But Lena knew what kind of man Felix was, knew how likely it was that he'd at least engaged in something with this accuser, but she hadn't missed a step.

Charley turns to go to the cabinets near the sink. "I'll get the glasses."

"Let me. Just sit back in one of these gorgeous stools," and Lena even turns a stool out along the island, so Charley makes her way to it, "and I'll show you how I got through until Felix made it big."

And it's easy to smile at that, to tuck her snide comments and doubts and fears into the corners of her lips, and settle down onto the bar stools that had been custom ordered to match their kitchen island. Easy to let herself pretend that a few drinks with an eager friend can make all of this go away.

Lena tugs open a cabinet for the glasses -- two, matching -- and spots the simple syrup right under it. She spins around with her finds, and her top pulls up and away from her jeans. A little sliver of skin to match the little smirk on her lips. She says, "The regulars loved me. You should've seen them, cheering for me like a bunch of groupies at an away game."

Was their accuser from an away game? One of those girls who buys a jersey and ties it to show off her belly ring? The ones who put on underwear in team colors but don't paint numbers on themselves so they're open to any player who picks them from the crowd?

Charley blinks back to the moment. "I've never been one to cheer." Not for anyone but Davis.

But Lena grins with a tilt of her head and plops everything onto the island. "After a few of these, trust me, you'll be singing my name." There's something in the snag of her lips as she says it, and Charley can't tell if it's a promise or a warning. Can't tell if it's light, like casual greetings and pecks on the cheek before brunch, or something more, like the double take Lena does at team events. When there's too many people to notice everything, but somehow Charley always catches Lena's eyes lingering on her. Normally caught somewhere around her lips or her cheekbones, never anywhere indecent but a bit too personal to be completely innocent.

She should let it go. But she finds herself leaning into her elbows on the tabletop, cheeks rising to look up to where Lena stands on the other end. Her voice comes out lower than expected. "Should I sing Lena, or would you prefer Mrs. Evans?" And the lower level gives her the perfect view of Lena's face, as eyes widen and lips quake around a grin that dries instantly.

Lena's voice even shakes, as she struggles to hold the eye contact. Has to glance down to her materials instead of facing Charley any longer. "I'll let you know."

/

iii. a want revealed

Lena rests back against the ground by the pool. Feet dangling in the water, jeans just soaking at this point because there's no way that pants that tight can roll anywhere higher than mid-calf. She eyes the couch wistfully, and Charley sips drink number four instead of acknowledging it.

The couch is off limits seeing as the last time she sat on the couch, she fucked her rapist husband. Wrapped herself around him and shed every ounce of protection and deniability. Promised to follow him anywhere he needed to get that fifth ring, which apparently now would mean a court room, or to a settlement if that'll actually work out. But what's the point in a settlement if her husband's culpable? To save the brand? To keep them from losing every endorsement and give Davis a shot at a future career? She's disavowed other men who've been accused of assault. She's cut them from the names of people she's willing to support, or let Davis support, and here she is, standing beside them in press conferences and trying to fight them on the court.

She could laugh. She should laugh. How the mighty have fallen, right? "I thought you were supposed to bring the catfights and the hair pulling." Back when Charley would bring the romance to a reality show centered on them. When things were easy, just a day ago.

Lena does laugh. "You beat me to it," she says, which is better than the response Charley's conjuring up. Charley's brain supplies an image of hair pulling, but it's relatively nondescript, just manicured nails like claws yanking. And Charley has to lie back against the ground too.

The sun should be setting soon, and then it'll be too bright with the sun glinting on the water. They'll have to go back into the house, maybe see Davis. He'd walked by earlier. Charley heard the footsteps even as he tried moving quietly. Lena had glared at Davis the whole of his way through the hall, and then she'd downed her drink and refilled both their glasses. If he'd gone back through, they'd missed it, too lost in the bad jokes Lena told to cover up the tension. But there won't be much they can do if they're all in the same room. If Charley has to physically and actually acknowledge him.

"How do you do it?" Charley asks her question to the sky, but Lena perks up in her peripheral vision. "Stay with Felix? Forgive him when he... finds someone else?" Because at this point, maybe that's all Davis did. He's been telling her for days that he wasn't with anyone that night, that he'd come home because that's the night Micah got sick and they'd been so worried he had something wrong with his lungs because he couldn't breathe right. So maybe, maybe he's only cheated once. Maybe it's forgivable.

Lena rolls her head from one side to the other. "I don't know if you'll like my way." She hums from the back of her throat. "But the way I see it, is if he can do it, so can I. I don't have a lot of other options." Financially, she means, not unless she wants to go back to bartending and barely skirting by. "So, we just call it even. Do what we want with who we want so long as it's quiet."

The sex or -- nope, not the sex, the fact that they're having it. Charley needs to slow down on the drinking. She's getting fuzzy. Less appropriate, less cultured, and that's what Lena comes to her for, isn't it? Culture and class and just a dash of possibility.

There've been a few times when Charley's caught Lena looking and she's played into it, just a bit; a quirk of the lips, a shift that gets the slit of her dress to inch higher, or that one time when she'd spent too many away games with Lena and the boys came home just for a charity event, and Charley'd seen the looks, the gulps, and she'd turned into Davis, ghosted her nails down his neck, kissed the side of his jaw, and turned back. He'd pulled her flush against him, hands at her hips, and ducked down to whisper in her ear everything he'd missed about her, how he planned to make up his absence while Micah was away. And she'd heard every word he said with her eyes locked on Lena's, even as she cocked her head to the side and let Davis start on a few of those promises. As she felt that familiar pull at her navel and finally just let her eyes come closed.

Presently, Charley sputters. Coughs and has to roll onto her side. Lena's lipstick's faded, rubbed off along the rim of the glass. Charley closes her eyes again. They'd been talking about Felix, about him cheating and Lena getting even.

"So you just cheat back."

Lena grins. "I cheat better. He seems to go for such easy targets, you know? Women who fall at his feet and brag about him on their snap stories. If I were more petty, I don't know, I'd probably find the same girls, but--" she laughs, but the shake belays the humor, shows her nerves, "-- I like a challenge, you know? If I'm gonna do it, it's gonna be good for me. And I mean good."

And Charley hears her, she does, but at least half of her brain stayed with the find the same girls and keeps playing the operative word over and over again. "So, you..." Charley honestly has to sit up. Brings herself back upright and finds her glass in her fist before she really even thinks about needing another drink. But she's glad that she has it. That she can have something to focus on other than the rush of blood in her ears and the actual confirmation that all of those moments weren't just a trick of the mind. They were real. Because Lena likes women, and Lena most certainly likes her.

Lena props herself up on her elbows. "I'm sorry." She's not. "Did that make you uncomfortable? I thought your sister was gay, plus it's L.A. So...." Her lashes flutter like it should be a given. And it is, it's just....

Charley sips a little too strong from her drink. "My sister's not gay." She nods at that, and Lena gives her this look like she's reaching too far. "She never uses a word for it, but she likes men. And women. Maybe other genders, I don't ask her questions if I don't need to. But she's not just gay."

"Good for her." Lena sits up then, and her feet slip up in the water. She angles her body towards Charley. Blinks at her with those endless eyes over a smile that reaches about as far as the sunset. "Look, Charley, I'm not telling you how to live your life. You want to go back in there and make up with him, do it. You want to get a divorce and never have to deal with any of this Gladiators business, go do that too. But if you want to focus on you, and what makes you feel good, then just know I'm here. Any time."

How had Charley described Lena earlier? She searches for the word while Lena keeps staring at her. Charley digs around the voyeuristic memories and the protective, possessive glare Lena'd sent at Davis. She wafts through the weird way she's been watching her friend and dodges the long while she'd spent marveling Lena's biceps when Lena squeezed the limes. Earlier, when she thought about being a choreographer, she'd thought of Lena as one of her dancers, strong and quick and -- oh -- eager.

From the tips of her lashes to the bated way she holds her breath, from the hitch in her throat down to the toes treading through the water to get out her nerves, Lena is nothing but eager. To have an answer, to have Charley. And she could probably have Charley in a way that would make her forget Davis. Could have Charley in a way that has her eyes shifting from Lena to the glass around them to nothing but the sky above their heads. And she'd learn exactly which name to sing. What pitch. What decibel.

But Charley couldn't do that. Not the way Lena could. It's not a healthy way to handle her feelings. It's cheap, and it's -- "I couldn't use you to get back at Davis."

Lena shrugs. "What are friends for?"

Charley snorts. Full on, and her hand flies to cover her mouth, her nose, and she laughs again because, honestly, "I've never had a friend like that." Never known anyone willing to let themselves be used just to make her happy. She shouldn't like that, right? Shouldn't feel flattered, or fascinated by the offer. Using people's not okay, even if it is technically something she's had to do before. This -- using Lena would be different. Sex might be nothing to Lena, but Charley's never been with anyone but Davis. Never had sex without love, and she probably couldn't separate the two if she wanted to. "I can't -- I wouldn't know--" what to do, how to act, how to "--anything."

She shouldn't admit something like that, not to someone so obviously well-versed in getting her way. Certainly not to someone she's been training either.

But Lena doesn't pounce on the information. Lena doesn't even bat an eye. "I could teach you. If you wanted."

There it is again, this recurring theme -- if she wanted, if she needs this -- so much of what's happened the last few days has been about the team, about Davis. Even before that, maybe a bit too much of her life has centered on him and not enough on her lately. What does she want?

Right now, she wants to finish her drink. She wants to bathe in the warmth of Lena's stare and the heat radiating from the ground below. Then she wants to go back in, and slip onto the couch in the living room, maybe watch a movie with Micah and call her dad. She doesn't want this. Not today anyway. But another day? That could probably be arranged. Considered. Wanted.

Charley settles back down onto the ground. She says, "Maybe later, Lena." And Lena does falter then, eyes flashing and muscles twitching in her jaw and the arm still holding her up. Fear creeps into Lena's gaze, and a Charley free of all this might've reached out to soothe out away. Smooth it away with her hands to ridiculously soft cheeks and assurances passed in the space between their lips. But she's not free of this yet. Her robe's still under the couch from the last time she'd been with Davis.

Lena tries nodding. "O-okay."

Charley clarifies, "That's not a no. I'm not opposed to learning. I just have a lot to deal with first. You understand."

Lena doesn't. She couldn't possibly, but she nods with more vigor this time. So ready to take the out and slip past this moment. She shifts, sliding closer to Charley, and glances down on Charley's face.

"Whenever you do though...."

Charley's grin snags when she tries to smile. It is a promise. "I'll find you."

"Good." Lena lingers in the look. Then her smile blasts back to its normal, casual light. "You know Felix would crap his pants at the thought."

Charley can laugh at that. She tells herself not to think of what Davis would do with the thought of them. If maybe that's the kind of thing that these other women would do for him. If they'd let him watch while another woman or man touched them. Or if something like that could've saved her marriage even if it left her splayed at the edges. No, Charley tells herself to let it go for now and just laugh. Sometimes, that's all a girl can do.

/

iv. a new deal is struck

Charley follows the sound of Lena's voice through the club. She ignores the stares that follow behind her, the quick clicks of people's phones and the words that would be whispers if not for the excitement. Someone calls out her name, but Lena's the one to turn at the sound of it. Good thing Charley's actually here because that quick turn could've been embarrassing without a target.

Lena's smile doubles in size. The woman at her side lobs a glare Charley's way, and Charley just grins back. Lena rises to greet her. A quick hug, a peck on the cheek that lands too close to her lips to be solely accidental.

"Charley! Didn't expect to see you tonight." Or any night really. Lena's eyes stay on her, a little too wide and too focused to be casual. "Last I heard you were settling your divorce."

Charley nods. Wets her lips before she says, "It's settled. He's not happy, but apparently he hadn't been for a while so." Her eyebrows jet up, then back down as she smiles. And it is a smile, something light enough that no one would question it. "But I wanted to find you. You simply must teach me your ways."

And it's like a switch flips in Lena. All of that energy bubbles up, and she tilts her head back in a laugh. She wastes no time, spinning around to her guest. "I'm so sorry. I've got to help her out, but I can call you. Maybe." She almost laughs again, and Charley shakes her head to hide her own smile. "Sorry, again." Then she's right back with Charley, stepping up and motioning towards the door to the club.

Charley technically leads the way, and Lena stays close to her back. They almost giggle, the sheer impossibility of the moment passing between them like lightning. They get caught in a crowd, a mass of people dancing too tightly to let anyone through. Lena chances a touch -- her hand catches on Charley's hip, her lips close to Charley's ear long enough to ask, "You figured out what you wanted?"

Charley leans into the touch just as the crowd gives way. "Did you?" When she tries turning, their faces come too close. Her words come out breathless. "Lena or Mrs. Evans?"

"Lena." No hesitation.

"Lena, Lena, Lena." They get through the crowd.

Lena clicks in Charley's ear. "You're supposed to sing it."

They reach the doors. "You'll have to make me."

The cool of the air sends goosebumps down their arms, but it gives a good reason to huddle closer. To wrap around each other while they wait on the valet to bring one of their cars around.

Lena says, "I'm pretty sure nobody makes you do anything." And it's true, but Charley offers her this:

"I thought you liked a challenge."

/

v. roll credits, cut to the villain's comeuppance

Davis screams into the phone the second Charley picks up. "Lena!" He scoffs, and he groans, and he probably slaps down his iPad from the sound of it. "That's how you played this? You fucked Felix's wife!?"

Charley flips the page on the magazine she's reading. It's probably the same one that Davis gets his information from. The cover shot's from the night at the club, of Charley and Lena wrapped around each other with barely a thing between them.

"Nice to talk to you, Davis. Did you want something?"

"Lena!"

"She's a little busy, but I could get her if you want." Now she's being petty, but she's earned the chance to be petty, hasn't she? Davis huffs on the other line, so lost in whatever he's trying to say that he can't get any words out. She turns on her stool to call down the hall. "Lena!"

"Charley, I cannot believe you would--"

Lena heads in. "Yeah? Who's on the phone?" Charley hands it over.

"Davis wants to say hi."

Lena takes it, puts it to her ear. "Hey Davis, how's New York?" He doesn't even answer, just hangs up. Lena pulls the phone back to check it and gives it back. "Hm, guess he didn't want to talk after all. Ooh, our first cover."

Charley jokes, "I'll blow it up like the others. Hang it in the office."

"You're really bad at being casual, you know that, right?"

Charley shrugs. "Why bother? I know what I want."

/

/

happy femslash february, and a very happy black history month ~

[batterymonster2021]

"The Plague" | Father Ted | Series 2 Episode 6 | Dead Parrot

New Post has been published on https://hititem.kr/the-plague-father-ted-series-2-episode-6-dead-parrot-5/

"The Plague" | Father Ted | Series 2 Episode 6 | Dead Parrot

Oh god man i’m such an e just I put the brief on my head happening Mikey Brandon you fairly are a significant phony it can be literally rough now not stop the pal Indonesian god i know anybody just like Ben large pickle come on you two just about there it is been creepy into some thing for goodness sake Jane there’s nothing out right here that might probably harm there’s no anywhere oh he is great is not he he is all right does he have a name no i don’t suppose so the lady within the pet shop didn’t mention one anyway I don’t know who’s Ted that is a good name for a rabbit no i do not suppose that’s a excellent concept can we you are forgetting i am referred to as head as good I would call you father Ted no severely do you must give you some thing just a little more common hi there father’s lordly design however mrs.Doyle is not a good name for rubbish you want whatever like popsie or Bruce okay wait I’ve obtained one you see the way he’s got tremendous floppy ears they are flopping in every single place the position yeah good why do not we name them father Jack Hackett ideal father jacket is what nothing father Zubaz named his new rabbit after you what we all right father Jack what he is not talking to you father he is talking to the rabbit why I think father Jack wishes a drink thanks thanks possibly dropping getting struggle for our truth Dubin that is getting a ways too confusing ahead I’ve acquired used to calling him father Jack could we no longer call father Jack whatever else grace what we name the mayor slipper slipper paprika yes so dude this is not going to work really it is me Bishop Brennan oh thanks what who is that this there’s no pretty ear god doogal i’m just must feel again to Bishop Brennan oh we won’t like that head might be it can be all right though I placed on a international voices you believe he died the incorrect number sir truly hiya bishop Brennan I consider you acquired the incorrect number when you call there shut up Queenie shut up i’ll make this rapid what would the following phrase advise to you jack sleepwalking and bollock naked no time in the final six months you might have heard of Brian Newman hmm very foremost junior minister and a private buddy of mine and i will be able to inform you the final thing he and his household desires to look is the imaginative and prescient of an elderly priest carrying most effective a pair of socks and no idea around on Thursday to compare the protection arrangements and Crilley yes should you ever attempt to bullshit me like that once more i will rip off your arm Brendan’s coming over to have a word with your father about your nude sleepwalking new deep on deck Jack can you think of any motive why you maybe doing that if you are now not having any doubts about your vocation Ariel what which you can invariably share your problems with us father Dugan and i would continually lend your friendly years now proper Google surely do you wish to have to speak about it now well Ted a biker Grove Oh God go on there Guam boy thank you oh come on oh can we get him into his cage they want bishop brennan singing head he could like him no he would not like him doesn’t like rabbit in any respect why no longer strange story about ten years in the past he was in ny and he obtained trapped within the elevate with about 20 rabbits of the entire night to began nibbling his cape and the whole lot how did they get in I do not know I suppose the ought to have burden you realize rabbits God he can transfer speedy no sweet why do you say that stated simply shut off the ground to me there wait that’s your ass yeah so where does this one come from Ted there is an extra one on Jack’s head you make sure you are not would not get combined up with these other lads all right come on Patrick what’s called sampras like Pete Sampras oh good you realize rabbits tennis you understand that whole connection there all correct and yeah we just released these pheromones into the wild k appears i’m there within the zone without any other rabbit for company you must suppose like Brian Keenan after they took John McCarthy way to another self anyway they get used to us morning father invoice is moved in 40 Ted morning Google what do we do in these days we’ll need to get that rabbit ears out of the way before British brand open door go mad in the event you toss those wrappers across the position right fair enough hope he’s in a excellent temper then can be very frightening you realize when when Robert rabbits the place oh wow the place the hell did they arrive from god it can be like a colossal rabbit rock pageant I feel we simply need to get used to it get used to you have to get the motor equipment earlier than you arrive i’m going to ring the pet save and know it used to be a traveling pet keep there is not going to be back till spring so what are we gonna do wait no no no there may be surely some thing we can do Ted if we no let me see oh simply wait a second they are there and i do know i do know I’ve obtained a Ted scorching right now now the way I see it is that if we wait a 2nd and what what is the main issue once more oh yes yes sure sorry about that i know exactly what to do why don’t we give them to father Larry canine you’re proper he’s perpetually going on about how we’d love to have a few rabbits jogging around the location I used to think used to be just a mad factor to say no Larry i really like Ted how is it striking and hanging pleasant Larry hear every predicament here you consider you were looking for just a few rabbits across the location I do here that’s one in all my possess attempting fantasies i might like to have a couple of hundred rabbits jogging everywhere the location well latest your fortunate day we have now obtained numerous the things oh i am sorry tater will not be ready to take them why now not Larry I noticed the quit on the rabbits notion where it just appeared too a ways-fetched so I bought 12 Rottweilers alternatively make sure rabbits simplest i would be afraid to rock wireless would upset them yeah yes Larry I appreciate bye bye bye Ted oh you’re the dangerous dog don’t you look at me like that little one bad dog he can’t take the gravity’s acquired 12 Rottweilers hiya yeah yeah yeah sure Father proper yes Father we can see them as well Harry japanese the workplace is like Google it’s like some variety of plague a significant rabbit plague i’m wondering if God is punishing us for something perhaps it can be considering I said facta Bishop Brennan God if you happen to send on an epidemic of rabbits simply on account that you stated powerful Bishop Brennan suppose what he’ll do when he finds out about all of the cash you stole from that charity joking that money used to be just resting my account earlier than I moved it on this no it was once strictly a nonprofit making subsidiary ok the mornings are gone it adopted father Jack out of the room mind you I’ve always concept father Jack gave off a style of forty scent perhaps they think he’s some variety of rabid God excellent so if we are able to simply keep Jack out of the way however Bishop Brennan is coming to peer Jack no we are going to have to get rid of them in case you become aware of telepathy Jordan works the greyhound monitor oh yeah name me historic-fashioned but I opt for the more conventional Greyhound fulfilling Roberts method well it can be only a proposal i am tell you what how you gon supply Tom a name he perhaps competent to help us in calling for other no thanks no I’ve acquired 10 pounds driving on that little beauty over there come on Tom it can be simply us hello ma’am my dog tom is aware of about this variety of thing he’d aid hello hello Tom would you love some dewey’s i will be able to do your facility no thanks some other time lifestyles and i think you just a few rabbits for me sure within the auto why is it which worried stated what i’ll do again i don’t fear Lee simply mentioned you take so they connect them all collectively and put them someplace reliable or so he can run around and have a bit of a play so then the most likely nothing to worry about that is what my intellect is aa severe considering the fact that I established let’s get yours an awfully spectacular sword princess Keegan’s rabbit in gadget her within the combat yeah certain yeah i have been flexing right here this time I used to be just sincere like readies legs FL um Tom you realize i’m the phrase deal with anything sure sir good I recognize now that you simply intended that in the type of Al Pacino means I was once pondering extra along the traces of Julie Andrews i don’t wanna say that what fact i might no come on tell which you can never boils if you what no no come true I could run on down Amy van I consider we might higher be off what’s the predicament there side and also you now say kill it off at sorry about that Tom thanks verify it anyway don’t do the run rather spot i am definite it won’t occur once more it is higher no longer monks jogging about within the nude is the last thing that we want yes and as you can see we have established a brand new closed-circuit digital camera and and we now have brought a couple of modifications to Jack’s bed oh yeah sure now this is new isn’t it it can be combined with a spice it makes get away just about impossible and we also have these new pyjamas very easy to position on very have to get off so that’s the historical nudity sorted and you have got a rope i’d like to see him bite by means of that again so within the not likely event of him getting out now we have this monitoring device which will have to provide us an handy recapture after which that fee 50 kilos and might be you would get that again from the diocese simply your cheeks whats up then do not name me Len i am a bishop your grace is more right oh you’re nice correct so anyway another time i’m dragged far from my heat hearth to come and care for the forged of police academy ha ha ha you behave your self now jack you listen to me jack No would you adore a drink your pink eye a small one please thanks my gosh with us folder let’s get the glasses serious very so much mr.Solo software there you might be Bishop Brennan I idea I must inform you your car is parked on slide sure I know it is I talked to them myself it tires look a bit of flat I might supply them a bit of a blow-off for you on the pump no what kind of air do you generally put in them we now have ardently oh that’s all now we have sincerely and if you’re looking for the wipers i have them within the kitchen what it appears like they wanted a bit of wash the one difficulty is it I broke the part window even as I was snapping them off depart my chair by myself and don’t touch it again just one query your grace is your automobile diesel or petrol go away it by myself mrs. Doyle it’s just curiosity your grace diesel is rescissions correct so what’s to not comprehend not occur correct so was it do a terrible quantity of harm of eyeful petrolatum sure it will it will fully damage the vehicle’s engine good I certainly is not going to be doing that boys you must clock up a fair ancient mileage every year going around the diocese doing the historical Bishop kind of fairly relatively anyplace is my room good then yours the spare room your Grace’s it’s the primary on the correct fair enough yeah this lettuce oh no thanks I’ve already had some that you may say no relatively I imply this lettuce the place did it come from it you would not have rabbits to you oh yeah i do not like them in any respect I had an expertise as soon as with any person it wasn’t very fine they get right into a list with me and they began to nibble at my scape and and everything is are you will have without doubt nothing to fear about your grace no that is simply the place we am where we develop to – you you develop lettuce indoors in a cage it is safer you know i’m no one can steal asunder good loved it brightens up the room and coolant is that this that’s them caviar caviar sure well it is not daily we’ve got a bishop around so we’ve got helped me get the caviar out proper so what you’ve performed is you may have spread some caviar down there so i can get down on my arms and knees and ease off the ground yes what do you believe i’m obviously a pony run to my bed I just put them google toboni hahaha a particularly reliable head fear nothing bet it is just about like the variety of location you would not even consider of god I do not know oh that small room at the back of the kitchen the cold cellar I bought the shed no hope it’s no longer the shed come on Ted suppose about it the place’s the final place you’d believe I taught them well the final situation I think it is put them can be and would absolutely be Bishop Brennan’s room bingo pirated I put the bunnies in the last position he’d ever expect to seek out it in his own room he’d on no account appeared there you are quality you’re correct particularly fairly what is that this now I simply wouldn’t say the entire bishop thing their place yeah I mean you may have received to get various this I just wish to say good done I mean we’re taught someone from Limerick would get this bar all of the ones you studied inside the seminary all of the other priests they they ought to be feeling lovely ailing on the second they must be watching on the television and long past cut how did that quite it you trap me you are busy nevertheless it’s now not it’s me no person eivol mentioned you’ve gotten a style of a bishop iere about your self i know I similar to to claim can i shake our hand good performed fairly commit to me I hate you so all that suggests without doubt nothing to me maintain on downstairs what occurred would you consider I just fell down the stairs there where are you might be you injured I have no idea why a bit of twinge all right my arm I can not transfer and if you need somebody to name an ambulance i know I think it’s just now not here for a whilst that is in general the high-quality factor for me now we are retired for the rest yeah then oh oh did see a documentary about the Russian i know who the top is atomic bomb to take action much damage i will bed clearly i am alright speak up and discover thank then you discover a rabbit What did he say don’t look I gotta inform you i am he name me on the other hand you deal with me by my correct title you little bollocks man Brennan what is he on about now huh god knows what the opposite now not now doing at the aegis i am nonetheless asking mr.Bishop finds out you’re omit bliss we are going first white I similar to to move to the toilet the entire other toys within the house are damaged it can be simply quantity one i do not work at all oh I needed that but there is no bathroom in here God John where are they they may be not in there we’re gonna recognize that could be a completely rabbit free area well I certainly put them in there Ted wait a minute Jack’s room maybe the scent of them and have to see him one last time suppose you perhaps putting that in a somewhat over romantic approach Duggal book good guess come on protect over your correct keep them right here how do they get in essentially the most erotic no rabbit well we’ve got student shifts get them out the husband’s a long way away of constructive why cannot we simply leave them here in view that Dougal my nerves are shot I will not be equipped to relax unless the only rabbits left is the one sitting to your head working the controls copper’s is aware of more in here seem at this one we look like that fella and harvey keitel completely satisfied content material long gone Google how might a rabbit seem like God Almighty anyway do many sorts of men and women things like that hey the monies are gone oh god the place’s Jackie oh my god not the bishops rope come on do it do not bet perhaps which you could come on come on only a dangerous dream you’re best you

[airoasis]

"The Plague" | Father Ted | Series 2 Episode 6 | Dead Parrot

New Post has been published on https://hititem.kr/the-plague-father-ted-series-2-episode-6-dead-parrot-5/

"The Plague" | Father Ted | Series 2 Episode 6 | Dead Parrot

Oh god man i’m such an e just I put the brief on my head happening Mikey Brandon you fairly are a significant phony it can be literally rough now not stop the pal Indonesian god i know anybody just like Ben large pickle come on you two just about there it is been creepy into some thing for goodness sake Jane there’s nothing out right here that might probably harm there’s no anywhere oh he is great is not he he is all right does he have a name no i don’t suppose so the lady within the pet shop didn’t mention one anyway I don’t know who’s Ted that is a good name for a rabbit no i do not suppose that’s a excellent concept can we you are forgetting i am referred to as head as good I would call you father Ted no severely do you must give you some thing just a little more common hi there father’s lordly design however mrs.Doyle is not a good name for rubbish you want whatever like popsie or Bruce okay wait I’ve obtained one you see the way he’s got tremendous floppy ears they are flopping in every single place the position yeah good why do not we name them father Jack Hackett ideal father jacket is what nothing father Zubaz named his new rabbit after you what we all right father Jack what he is not talking to you father he is talking to the rabbit why I think father Jack wishes a drink thanks thanks possibly dropping getting struggle for our truth Dubin that is getting a ways too confusing ahead I’ve acquired used to calling him father Jack could we no longer call father Jack whatever else grace what we name the mayor slipper slipper paprika yes so dude this is not going to work really it is me Bishop Brennan oh thanks what who is that this there’s no pretty ear god doogal i’m just must feel again to Bishop Brennan oh we won’t like that head might be it can be all right though I placed on a international voices you believe he died the incorrect number sir truly hiya bishop Brennan I consider you acquired the incorrect number when you call there shut up Queenie shut up i’ll make this rapid what would the following phrase advise to you jack sleepwalking and bollock naked no time in the final six months you might have heard of Brian Newman hmm very foremost junior minister and a private buddy of mine and i will be able to inform you the final thing he and his household desires to look is the imaginative and prescient of an elderly priest carrying most effective a pair of socks and no idea around on Thursday to compare the protection arrangements and Crilley yes should you ever attempt to bullshit me like that once more i will rip off your arm Brendan’s coming over to have a word with your father about your nude sleepwalking new deep on deck Jack can you think of any motive why you maybe doing that if you are now not having any doubts about your vocation Ariel what which you can invariably share your problems with us father Dugan and i would continually lend your friendly years now proper Google surely do you wish to have to speak about it now well Ted a biker Grove Oh God go on there Guam boy thank you oh come on oh can we get him into his cage they want bishop brennan singing head he could like him no he would not like him doesn’t like rabbit in any respect why no longer strange story about ten years in the past he was in ny and he obtained trapped within the elevate with about 20 rabbits of the entire night to began nibbling his cape and the whole lot how did they get in I do not know I suppose the ought to have burden you realize rabbits God he can transfer speedy no sweet why do you say that stated simply shut off the ground to me there wait that’s your ass yeah so where does this one come from Ted there is an extra one on Jack’s head you make sure you are not would not get combined up with these other lads all right come on Patrick what’s called sampras like Pete Sampras oh good you realize rabbits tennis you understand that whole connection there all correct and yeah we just released these pheromones into the wild k appears i’m there within the zone without any other rabbit for company you must suppose like Brian Keenan after they took John McCarthy way to another self anyway they get used to us morning father invoice is moved in 40 Ted morning Google what do we do in these days we’ll need to get that rabbit ears out of the way before British brand open door go mad in the event you toss those wrappers across the position right fair enough hope he’s in a excellent temper then can be very frightening you realize when when Robert rabbits the place oh wow the place the hell did they arrive from god it can be like a colossal rabbit rock pageant I feel we simply need to get used to it get used to you have to get the motor equipment earlier than you arrive i’m going to ring the pet save and know it used to be a traveling pet keep there is not going to be back till spring so what are we gonna do wait no no no there may be surely some thing we can do Ted if we no let me see oh simply wait a second they are there and i do know i do know I’ve obtained a Ted scorching right now now the way I see it is that if we wait a 2nd and what what is the main issue once more oh yes yes sure sorry about that i know exactly what to do why don’t we give them to father Larry canine you’re proper he’s perpetually going on about how we’d love to have a few rabbits jogging around the location I used to think used to be just a mad factor to say no Larry i really like Ted how is it striking and hanging pleasant Larry hear every predicament here you consider you were looking for just a few rabbits across the location I do here that’s one in all my possess attempting fantasies i might like to have a couple of hundred rabbits jogging everywhere the location well latest your fortunate day we have now obtained numerous the things oh i am sorry tater will not be ready to take them why now not Larry I noticed the quit on the rabbits notion where it just appeared too a ways-fetched so I bought 12 Rottweilers alternatively make sure rabbits simplest i would be afraid to rock wireless would upset them yeah yes Larry I appreciate bye bye bye Ted oh you’re the dangerous dog don’t you look at me like that little one bad dog he can’t take the gravity’s acquired 12 Rottweilers hiya yeah yeah yeah sure Father proper yes Father we can see them as well Harry japanese the workplace is like Google it’s like some variety of plague a significant rabbit plague i’m wondering if God is punishing us for something perhaps it can be considering I said facta Bishop Brennan God if you happen to send on an epidemic of rabbits simply on account that you stated powerful Bishop Brennan suppose what he’ll do when he finds out about all of the cash you stole from that charity joking that money used to be just resting my account earlier than I moved it on this no it was once strictly a nonprofit making subsidiary ok the mornings are gone it adopted father Jack out of the room mind you I’ve always concept father Jack gave off a style of forty scent perhaps they think he’s some variety of rabid God excellent so if we are able to simply keep Jack out of the way however Bishop Brennan is coming to peer Jack no we are going to have to get rid of them in case you become aware of telepathy Jordan works the greyhound monitor oh yeah name me historic-fashioned but I opt for the more conventional Greyhound fulfilling Roberts method well it can be only a proposal i am tell you what how you gon supply Tom a name he perhaps competent to help us in calling for other no thanks no I’ve acquired 10 pounds driving on that little beauty over there come on Tom it can be simply us hello ma’am my dog tom is aware of about this variety of thing he’d aid hello hello Tom would you love some dewey’s i will be able to do your facility no thanks some other time lifestyles and i think you just a few rabbits for me sure within the auto why is it which worried stated what i’ll do again i don’t fear Lee simply mentioned you take so they connect them all collectively and put them someplace reliable or so he can run around and have a bit of a play so then the most likely nothing to worry about that is what my intellect is aa severe considering the fact that I established let’s get yours an awfully spectacular sword princess Keegan’s rabbit in gadget her within the combat yeah certain yeah i have been flexing right here this time I used to be just sincere like readies legs FL um Tom you realize i’m the phrase deal with anything sure sir good I recognize now that you simply intended that in the type of Al Pacino means I was once pondering extra along the traces of Julie Andrews i don’t wanna say that what fact i might no come on tell which you can never boils if you what no no come true I could run on down Amy van I consider we might higher be off what’s the predicament there side and also you now say kill it off at sorry about that Tom thanks verify it anyway don’t do the run rather spot i am definite it won’t occur once more it is higher no longer monks jogging about within the nude is the last thing that we want yes and as you can see we have established a brand new closed-circuit digital camera and and we now have brought a couple of modifications to Jack’s bed oh yeah sure now this is new isn’t it it can be combined with a spice it makes get away just about impossible and we also have these new pyjamas very easy to position on very have to get off so that’s the historical nudity sorted and you have got a rope i’d like to see him bite by means of that again so within the not likely event of him getting out now we have this monitoring device which will have to provide us an handy recapture after which that fee 50 kilos and might be you would get that again from the diocese simply your cheeks whats up then do not name me Len i am a bishop your grace is more right oh you’re nice correct so anyway another time i’m dragged far from my heat hearth to come and care for the forged of police academy ha ha ha you behave your self now jack you listen to me jack No would you adore a drink your pink eye a small one please thanks my gosh with us folder let’s get the glasses serious very so much mr.Solo software there you might be Bishop Brennan I idea I must inform you your car is parked on slide sure I know it is I talked to them myself it tires look a bit of flat I might supply them a bit of a blow-off for you on the pump no what kind of air do you generally put in them we now have ardently oh that’s all now we have sincerely and if you’re looking for the wipers i have them within the kitchen what it appears like they wanted a bit of wash the one difficulty is it I broke the part window even as I was snapping them off depart my chair by myself and don’t touch it again just one query your grace is your automobile diesel or petrol go away it by myself mrs. Doyle it’s just curiosity your grace diesel is rescissions correct so what’s to not comprehend not occur correct so was it do a terrible quantity of harm of eyeful petrolatum sure it will it will fully damage the vehicle’s engine good I certainly is not going to be doing that boys you must clock up a fair ancient mileage every year going around the diocese doing the historical Bishop kind of fairly relatively anyplace is my room good then yours the spare room your Grace’s it’s the primary on the correct fair enough yeah this lettuce oh no thanks I’ve already had some that you may say no relatively I imply this lettuce the place did it come from it you would not have rabbits to you oh yeah i do not like them in any respect I had an expertise as soon as with any person it wasn’t very fine they get right into a list with me and they began to nibble at my scape and and everything is are you will have without doubt nothing to fear about your grace no that is simply the place we am where we develop to – you you develop lettuce indoors in a cage it is safer you know i’m no one can steal asunder good loved it brightens up the room and coolant is that this that’s them caviar caviar sure well it is not daily we’ve got a bishop around so we’ve got helped me get the caviar out proper so what you’ve performed is you may have spread some caviar down there so i can get down on my arms and knees and ease off the ground yes what do you believe i’m obviously a pony run to my bed I just put them google toboni hahaha a particularly reliable head fear nothing bet it is just about like the variety of location you would not even consider of god I do not know oh that small room at the back of the kitchen the cold cellar I bought the shed no hope it’s no longer the shed come on Ted suppose about it the place’s the final place you’d believe I taught them well the final situation I think it is put them can be and would absolutely be Bishop Brennan’s room bingo pirated I put the bunnies in the last position he’d ever expect to seek out it in his own room he’d on no account appeared there you are quality you’re correct particularly fairly what is that this now I simply wouldn’t say the entire bishop thing their place yeah I mean you may have received to get various this I just wish to say good done I mean we’re taught someone from Limerick would get this bar all of the ones you studied inside the seminary all of the other priests they they ought to be feeling lovely ailing on the second they must be watching on the television and long past cut how did that quite it you trap me you are busy nevertheless it’s now not it’s me no person eivol mentioned you’ve gotten a style of a bishop iere about your self i know I similar to to claim can i shake our hand good performed fairly commit to me I hate you so all that suggests without doubt nothing to me maintain on downstairs what occurred would you consider I just fell down the stairs there where are you might be you injured I have no idea why a bit of twinge all right my arm I can not transfer and if you need somebody to name an ambulance i know I think it’s just now not here for a whilst that is in general the high-quality factor for me now we are retired for the rest yeah then oh oh did see a documentary about the Russian i know who the top is atomic bomb to take action much damage i will bed clearly i am alright speak up and discover thank then you discover a rabbit What did he say don’t look I gotta inform you i am he name me on the other hand you deal with me by my correct title you little bollocks man Brennan what is he on about now huh god knows what the opposite now not now doing at the aegis i am nonetheless asking mr.Bishop finds out you’re omit bliss we are going first white I similar to to move to the toilet the entire other toys within the house are damaged it can be simply quantity one i do not work at all oh I needed that but there is no bathroom in here God John where are they they may be not in there we’re gonna recognize that could be a completely rabbit free area well I certainly put them in there Ted wait a minute Jack’s room maybe the scent of them and have to see him one last time suppose you perhaps putting that in a somewhat over romantic approach Duggal book good guess come on protect over your correct keep them right here how do they get in essentially the most erotic no rabbit well we’ve got student shifts get them out the husband’s a long way away of constructive why cannot we simply leave them here in view that Dougal my nerves are shot I will not be equipped to relax unless the only rabbits left is the one sitting to your head working the controls copper’s is aware of more in here seem at this one we look like that fella and harvey keitel completely satisfied content material long gone Google how might a rabbit seem like God Almighty anyway do many sorts of men and women things like that hey the monies are gone oh god the place’s Jackie oh my god not the bishops rope come on do it do not bet perhaps which you could come on come on only a dangerous dream you’re best you

[batterymonster2021]

"The Plague" | Father Ted | Series 2 Episode 6 | Dead Parrot

New Post has been published on https://hititem.kr/the-plague-father-ted-series-2-episode-6-dead-parrot/

"The Plague" | Father Ted | Series 2 Episode 6 | Dead Parrot

Oh god man i am such an e just I put the brief on my head happening Mikey Brandon you really are a giant phony it’s literally tough now not discontinue the friend Indonesian god i do know anyone identical to Ben giant pickle come on you two just about there it can be been creepy into whatever for goodness sake Jane there may be nothing out right here that could very likely damage there’s no wherever oh he is quality isn’t he he’s all right does he have a name no i do not suppose so the lady within the pet store failed to mention one anyway I don’t know who’s Ted that’s a excellent identify for a rabbit no i do not believe that’s a good inspiration will we you are forgetting i’m called head as well I might call you father Ted no seriously do you need to give you some thing slightly more long-established howdy father’s lordly design nonetheless mrs. Doyle shouldn’t be a good title for garbage you want anything like popsie or Bruce all right wait I’ve acquired one you see the way he’s acquired large floppy ears they are flopping all over the place the location yeah well why do not we call them father Jack Hackett perfect father jacket is what nothing father Zubaz named his new rabbit after you what we alright father Jack what he’s not talking to you father he is speaking to the rabbit why I think father Jack wants a drink thanks thanks possibly losing getting struggle for our reality Dubin that is getting a ways too confusing forward I’ve obtained used to calling him father Jack could we not call father Jack something else grace what we name the mayor slipper slipper paprika sure so dude this isn’t going to work relatively it can be me Bishop Brennan oh thank you what who is that this there’s no pretty ear god doogal i’m just have got to consider back to Bishop Brennan oh we is not going to like that head maybe it can be all proper although I placed on a foreign voices you consider he died the improper number sir truly good day bishop Brennan I suppose you obtained the incorrect quantity whilst you name there shut up Queenie shut up i’ll make this fast what would the next word endorse to you jack sleepwalking and bollock bare no time in the last six months you may have heard of Brian Newman hmm very major junior minister and a personal buddy of mine and i will let you know the final thing he and his loved ones needs to peer is the imaginative and prescient of an elderly priest wearing most effective a pair of socks and no inspiration round on Thursday to evaluate the safety arrangements and Crilley sure if you happen to ever attempt to bullshit me like that again i will rip off your arm Brendan’s coming over to have a phrase together with your father about your nude sleepwalking new deep on deck Jack can you feel of any rationale why you possibly doing that if you are now not having any doubts about your vocation Ariel what that you would be able to invariably share your issues with us father Dugan and i might invariably lend your friendly years now right Google certainly do you want to talk about it now good Ted a biker Grove Oh God go on there Guam boy thanks oh come on oh do we get him into his cage they want bishop brennan singing head he could like him no he would not like him doesn’t like rabbit in any respect why now not strange story about ten years ago he was in ny and he got trapped within the carry with about 20 rabbits of the entire night time to started nibbling his cape and everything how did they get in I have no idea I suppose the have got to have burden you recognize rabbits God he can move speedy no sweet why do you say that said simply shut off the floor to me there wait that’s your ass yeah so where does this one come from Ted there is an additional one on Jack’s head you make sure you are now not does not get mixed up with these other lads all correct come on Patrick what’s known as sampras like Pete Sampras oh well rabbits tennis you already know that entire connection there all correct and yeah we just launched these pheromones into the wild ok looks i am there within the zone with out some other rabbit for organization you have got to suppose like Brian Keenan after they took John McCarthy technique to yet another self anyway they get used to us morning father invoice is moved in 40 Ted morning Google what can we do today we’ll must get that rabbit ears out of the way earlier than British manufacturer open door go mad when you toss these wrappers across the position proper reasonable ample hope he is in a good mood then may also be very frightening you recognize when when Robert rabbits the place oh wow where the hell did they come from god it’s like a significant rabbit rock festival I believe we simply need to get used to it get used to you must get the motor apparatus before you arrive i’m going to ring the pet store and know it used to be a traveling pet keep there won’t be again until spring so what are we gonna do wait no no no there may be surely something we will do Ted if we no let me see oh just wait a 2nd they’re there and i do know i know I’ve obtained a Ted scorching right now now the way I see it’s that if we wait a 2nd and what what’s the difficulty again oh sure yes sure sorry about that i know exactly what to do why don’t we provide them to father Larry dog you’re proper he’s always happening about how we would like to have just a few rabbits strolling across the place I used to feel used to be only a mad thing to assert no Larry i like Ted how is it striking and hanging quality Larry pay attention each hindrance here you recollect you had been looking for a few rabbits around the place I do right here that’s considered one of my possess trying fantasies i would like to have just a few hundred rabbits strolling everywhere the place well state-of-the-art your fortunate day we’ve got acquired numerous the matters oh i am sorry tater will not be in a position to take them why now not Larry I noticed the give up on the rabbits thought the place it just appeared too a ways-fetched so I received 12 Rottweilers rather make certain rabbits only i’d be afraid to rock wireless would upset them yeah yes Larry I appreciate bye bye bye Ted oh you are the unhealthy dog don’t you seem at me like that little one bad canine he can not take the gravity’s acquired 12 Rottweilers good day yeah yeah yeah sure Father proper yes Father we are able to see them as good Harry japanese the place of business is like Google it’s like some form of plague a colossal rabbit plague i’m wondering if God is punishing us for something maybe it is because I stated facta Bishop Brennan God when you send on a deadly disease of rabbits just considering that you said strong Bishop Brennan imagine what he’ll do when he finds out about all of the cash you stole from that charity joking that money used to be just resting my account before I moved it on this no it was once strictly a nonprofit making subsidiary ok the mornings are long past it followed father Jack out of the room mind you I’ve always inspiration father Jack gave off a variety of forty odor perhaps they believe he’s some sort of rabid God excellent so if we can just hold Jack out of the way but Bishop Brennan is coming to look Jack no we will must eliminate them in the event you discover telepathy Jordan works the greyhound monitor oh yeah call me old-common however I pick the more traditional Greyhound gratifying Roberts approach good it is just a notion i am inform you what the way you gon supply Tom a name he might be equipped to aid us in calling for other no thanks no I’ve got 10 kilos riding on that little beauty over there come on Tom it is simply us hello ma’am my dog tom is aware of about this style of factor he’d aid hiya howdy Tom would you love some dewey’s i will be able to do your facility no thanks some other time lifestyles and i suppose you a couple of rabbits for me sure in the auto why is it which concerned said what i’ll do once more i don’t worry Lee just said you’re taking in order that they connect them all together and put them someplace nontoxic or so he can run round and have a bit of a play so then the most likely nothing to worry about that is what my mind is aa serious when you consider that I mounted let’s get yours a very spectacular sword princess Keegan’s rabbit in device her within the battle yeah definite yeah i have been flexing right here this time I used to be just sincere like readies legs FL um Tom you know i am the phrase handle anything sure sir well I recognize now that you simply meant that in the sort of Al Pacino method I was thinking extra along the lines of Julie Andrews i do not wanna say that what fact i would no come on tell that you can in no way boils if you what no no come true I might run on down Amy van I suppose we’d better be off what is the hindrance there aspect and you now say kill it off at sorry about that Tom thanks verify it anyway don’t do the run rather spot i am certain it will not occur once more it is better now not monks strolling about in the nude is the final factor that we need yes and as one can find we have now installed a new closed-circuit digicam and and we’ve got added just a few modifications to Jack’s mattress oh yeah yes now that is new is not it it can be mixed with a spice it makes get away just about unimaginable and we even have these new pyjamas very handy to put on very ought to get off so that is the historical nudity sorted and you have got a rope i might like to look him chunk through that again so within the not going occasion of him getting out we have this tracking gadget which must supply us an easy recapture and then that cost 50 kilos and probably you would get that again from the diocese simply your cheeks good day then don’t call me Len i am a bishop your grace is extra right oh you’re first-class correct so anyway all over again i am dragged away from my warm fireplace to come back and handle the cast of police academy ha ha ha you behave your self now jack you hearken to me jack No would you love a drink your purple eye a small one please thanks my gosh with us folder let’s get the glasses critical very a lot mr.Solo application there you might be Bishop Brennan I suggestion I must let you know your automobile is parked on slide sure I realize it is I talked to them myself it tires appear a little flat I might give them a little bit of a blow-off for you at the pump no what form of air do you regularly put in them we’ve ardently oh that is all we’ve got honestly and if you’re watching for the wipers i have them within the kitchen what it looks like they needed a bit wash the one hindrance is it I broke the side window at the same time I was once snapping them off go away my chair alone and do not contact it again just one question your grace is your auto diesel or petrol leave it on my own mrs.Doyle it’s just curiosity your grace diesel is rescissions correct so what’s not to comprehend now not occur right so was it do a terrible quantity of harm of eyeful petrolatum yes it would it will fully destroy the car’s engine good I surely is not going to be doing that boys you have to clock up a reasonable historical mileage every 12 months going across the diocese you know doing the historical Bishop form of rather quite anywhere is my room well then yours the spare room your Grace’s it’s the first on the right fair adequate yeah this lettuce oh no thanks I’ve already had some which you can say no fairly I mean this lettuce the place did it come from it you should not have rabbits to you oh yeah i do not like them in any respect I had an experience once with anybody it wasn’t very fine they get into a list with me they usually began to nibble at my scape and and the whole lot is are you will have undoubtedly nothing to fear about your grace no that is just where we am where we grow to – you you develop lettuce indoors in a cage it is safer you already know i am nobody can steal asunder well loved it brightens up the room and coolant is this that is them caviar caviar yes good it is not day-to-day we have now a bishop round so now we have helped me get the caviar out correct so what you may have carried out is you’ve unfold some caviar down there so i will get down on my arms and knees and ease off the floor yes what do you think i’m naturally a pony run to my bed I just put them google toboni hahaha a rather dependable head worry nothing guess it can be virtually like the form of place you wouldn’t even suppose of god I have no idea oh that small room in the back of the kitchen the bloodless cellar I received the shed no hope it’s not the shed come on Ted consider about it the place’s the final position you’d suppose I taught them good the final position I believe it’s put them would be and would surely be Bishop Brennan’s room bingo pirated I put the bunnies within the final position he’d ever assume to find it in his possess room he’d under no circumstances looked there you are excellent you’re correct relatively really what is this now I just would not say the entire bishop thing their situation yeah I mean you could have bought to get plenty of this I just wish to say you know well executed I mean we’re taught a person from Limerick would get this bar all of the ones you studied inside the seminary the entire different monks they they need to be feeling pretty in poor health on the second they ought to be looking on the television and long past cut how did that incredibly it you trap me you’re busy but it surely’s now not it’s me no person eivol said you’ve gotten a variety of a bishop iere about yourself i do know I just like to say am i able to shake our hand well carried out rather commit to me I hate you so all that suggests certainly nothing to me keep on downstairs what happened would you suppose I simply fell down the stairs there the place are you’re you injured I do not know why somewhat twinge all correct my arm I can’t move and if you need somebody to call an ambulance i do know I believe it’s just no longer right here for a while that is mostly the quality thing for me now we are retired for the relaxation yeah then oh oh did see a documentary in regards to the Russian i know who the top is atomic bomb to take action much harm i’ll mattress naturally i’m okay speak up and discover thank then you definitely find a rabbit What did he say do not appear I gotta let you know i’m he name me however you handle me by my correct title you little bollocks man Brennan what’s he on about now huh god is aware of what the opposite not now doing at the aegis i am nonetheless asking mr.Bishop finds out you are omit bliss we’re going first white I identical to to move to the bathroom all of the different toys within the condo are broken it is just quantity one i do not work in any respect oh I needed that but there isn’t a rest room in right here God John where are they they’re now not in there we’re gonna understand that may be a fully rabbit free subject good I undoubtedly put them in there Ted wait a minute Jack’s room possibly the odor of them and have got to see him one last time believe you might be putting that in a somewhat over romantic method Duggal ebook excellent wager come on safeguard over your proper maintain them right here how do they get in essentially the most erotic no rabbit good we now have student shifts get them out the husband’s some distance away of positive why can’t we simply depart them here seeing that Dougal my nerves are shot I will not be able to relax except the one rabbits left is the one sitting in your head working the controls copper’s is aware of more in right here look at this one we look like that fella and harvey keitel blissful content material long gone Google how would a rabbit look like God Almighty anyway do many types of persons matters like that hello the monies are gone oh god the place’s Jackie oh my god not the bishops rope come on do it do not wager possibly you could come on come on only a unhealthy dream you are excellent you

[airoasis]

"The Plague" | Father Ted | Series 2 Episode 6 | Dead Parrot

New Post has been published on https://hititem.kr/the-plague-father-ted-series-2-episode-6-dead-parrot/

"The Plague" | Father Ted | Series 2 Episode 6 | Dead Parrot

Oh god man i am such an e just I put the brief on my head happening Mikey Brandon you really are a giant phony it’s literally tough now not discontinue the friend Indonesian god i do know anyone identical to Ben giant pickle come on you two just about there it can be been creepy into whatever for goodness sake Jane there may be nothing out right here that could very likely damage there’s no wherever oh he is quality isn’t he he’s all right does he have a name no i do not suppose so the lady within the pet store failed to mention one anyway I don’t know who’s Ted that’s a excellent identify for a rabbit no i do not believe that’s a good inspiration will we you are forgetting i’m called head as well I might call you father Ted no seriously do you need to give you some thing slightly more long-established howdy father’s lordly design nonetheless mrs. Doyle shouldn’t be a good title for garbage you want anything like popsie or Bruce all right wait I’ve acquired one you see the way he’s acquired large floppy ears they are flopping all over the place the location yeah well why do not we call them father Jack Hackett perfect father jacket is what nothing father Zubaz named his new rabbit after you what we alright father Jack what he’s not talking to you father he is speaking to the rabbit why I think father Jack wants a drink thanks thanks possibly losing getting struggle for our reality Dubin that is getting a ways too confusing forward I’ve obtained used to calling him father Jack could we not call father Jack something else grace what we name the mayor slipper slipper paprika sure so dude this isn’t going to work relatively it can be me Bishop Brennan oh thank you what who is that this there’s no pretty ear god doogal i’m just have got to consider back to Bishop Brennan oh we is not going to like that head maybe it can be all proper although I placed on a foreign voices you consider he died the improper number sir truly good day bishop Brennan I suppose you obtained the incorrect quantity whilst you name there shut up Queenie shut up i’ll make this fast what would the next word endorse to you jack sleepwalking and bollock bare no time in the last six months you may have heard of Brian Newman hmm very major junior minister and a personal buddy of mine and i will let you know the final thing he and his loved ones needs to peer is the imaginative and prescient of an elderly priest wearing most effective a pair of socks and no inspiration round on Thursday to evaluate the safety arrangements and Crilley sure if you happen to ever attempt to bullshit me like that again i will rip off your arm Brendan’s coming over to have a phrase together with your father about your nude sleepwalking new deep on deck Jack can you feel of any rationale why you possibly doing that if you are now not having any doubts about your vocation Ariel what that you would be able to invariably share your issues with us father Dugan and i might invariably lend your friendly years now right Google certainly do you want to talk about it now good Ted a biker Grove Oh God go on there Guam boy thanks oh come on oh do we get him into his cage they want bishop brennan singing head he could like him no he would not like him doesn’t like rabbit in any respect why now not strange story about ten years ago he was in ny and he got trapped within the carry with about 20 rabbits of the entire night time to started nibbling his cape and everything how did they get in I have no idea I suppose the have got to have burden you recognize rabbits God he can move speedy no sweet why do you say that said simply shut off the floor to me there wait that’s your ass yeah so where does this one come from Ted there is an additional one on Jack’s head you make sure you are now not does not get mixed up with these other lads all correct come on Patrick what’s known as sampras like Pete Sampras oh well rabbits tennis you already know that entire connection there all correct and yeah we just launched these pheromones into the wild ok looks i am there within the zone with out some other rabbit for organization you have got to suppose like Brian Keenan after they took John McCarthy technique to yet another self anyway they get used to us morning father invoice is moved in 40 Ted morning Google what can we do today we’ll must get that rabbit ears out of the way earlier than British manufacturer open door go mad when you toss these wrappers across the position proper reasonable ample hope he is in a good mood then may also be very frightening you recognize when when Robert rabbits the place oh wow where the hell did they come from god it’s like a significant rabbit rock festival I believe we simply need to get used to it get used to you must get the motor apparatus before you arrive i’m going to ring the pet store and know it used to be a traveling pet keep there won’t be again until spring so what are we gonna do wait no no no there may be surely something we will do Ted if we no let me see oh just wait a 2nd they’re there and i do know i know I’ve obtained a Ted scorching right now now the way I see it’s that if we wait a 2nd and what what’s the difficulty again oh sure yes sure sorry about that i know exactly what to do why don’t we provide them to father Larry dog you’re proper he’s always happening about how we would like to have just a few rabbits strolling across the place I used to feel used to be only a mad thing to assert no Larry i like Ted how is it striking and hanging quality Larry pay attention each hindrance here you recollect you had been looking for a few rabbits around the place I do right here that’s considered one of my possess trying fantasies i would like to have just a few hundred rabbits strolling everywhere the place well state-of-the-art your fortunate day we’ve got acquired numerous the matters oh i am sorry tater will not be in a position to take them why now not Larry I noticed the give up on the rabbits thought the place it just appeared too a ways-fetched so I received 12 Rottweilers rather make certain rabbits only i’d be afraid to rock wireless would upset them yeah yes Larry I appreciate bye bye bye Ted oh you are the unhealthy dog don’t you seem at me like that little one bad canine he can not take the gravity’s acquired 12 Rottweilers good day yeah yeah yeah sure Father proper yes Father we are able to see them as good Harry japanese the place of business is like Google it’s like some form of plague a colossal rabbit plague i’m wondering if God is punishing us for something maybe it is because I stated facta Bishop Brennan God when you send on a deadly disease of rabbits just considering that you said strong Bishop Brennan imagine what he’ll do when he finds out about all of the cash you stole from that charity joking that money used to be just resting my account before I moved it on this no it was once strictly a nonprofit making subsidiary ok the mornings are long past it followed father Jack out of the room mind you I’ve always inspiration father Jack gave off a variety of forty odor perhaps they believe he’s some sort of rabid God excellent so if we can just hold Jack out of the way but Bishop Brennan is coming to look Jack no we will must eliminate them in the event you discover telepathy Jordan works the greyhound monitor oh yeah call me old-common however I pick the more traditional Greyhound gratifying Roberts approach good it is just a notion i am inform you what the way you gon supply Tom a name he might be equipped to aid us in calling for other no thanks no I’ve got 10 kilos riding on that little beauty over there come on Tom it is simply us hello ma’am my dog tom is aware of about this style of factor he’d aid hiya howdy Tom would you love some dewey’s i will be able to do your facility no thanks some other time lifestyles and i suppose you a couple of rabbits for me sure in the auto why is it which concerned said what i’ll do once more i don’t worry Lee just said you’re taking in order that they connect them all together and put them someplace nontoxic or so he can run round and have a bit of a play so then the most likely nothing to worry about that is what my mind is aa serious when you consider that I mounted let’s get yours a very spectacular sword princess Keegan’s rabbit in device her within the battle yeah definite yeah i have been flexing right here this time I used to be just sincere like readies legs FL um Tom you know i am the phrase handle anything sure sir well I recognize now that you simply meant that in the sort of Al Pacino method I was thinking extra along the lines of Julie Andrews i do not wanna say that what fact i would no come on tell that you can in no way boils if you what no no come true I might run on down Amy van I suppose we’d better be off what is the hindrance there aspect and you now say kill it off at sorry about that Tom thanks verify it anyway don’t do the run rather spot i am certain it will not occur once more it is better now not monks strolling about in the nude is the final factor that we need yes and as one can find we have now installed a new closed-circuit digicam and and we’ve got added just a few modifications to Jack’s mattress oh yeah yes now that is new is not it it can be mixed with a spice it makes get away just about unimaginable and we even have these new pyjamas very handy to put on very ought to get off so that is the historical nudity sorted and you have got a rope i might like to look him chunk through that again so within the not going occasion of him getting out we have this tracking gadget which must supply us an easy recapture and then that cost 50 kilos and probably you would get that again from the diocese simply your cheeks good day then don’t call me Len i am a bishop your grace is extra right oh you’re first-class correct so anyway all over again i am dragged away from my warm fireplace to come back and handle the cast of police academy ha ha ha you behave your self now jack you hearken to me jack No would you love a drink your purple eye a small one please thanks my gosh with us folder let’s get the glasses critical very a lot mr.Solo application there you might be Bishop Brennan I suggestion I must let you know your automobile is parked on slide sure I realize it is I talked to them myself it tires appear a little flat I might give them a little bit of a blow-off for you at the pump no what form of air do you regularly put in them we’ve ardently oh that is all we’ve got honestly and if you’re watching for the wipers i have them within the kitchen what it looks like they needed a bit wash the one hindrance is it I broke the side window at the same time I was once snapping them off go away my chair alone and do not contact it again just one question your grace is your auto diesel or petrol leave it on my own mrs.Doyle it’s just curiosity your grace diesel is rescissions correct so what’s not to comprehend now not occur right so was it do a terrible quantity of harm of eyeful petrolatum yes it would it will fully destroy the car’s engine good I surely is not going to be doing that boys you have to clock up a reasonable historical mileage every 12 months going across the diocese you know doing the historical Bishop form of rather quite anywhere is my room well then yours the spare room your Grace’s it’s the first on the right fair adequate yeah this lettuce oh no thanks I’ve already had some which you can say no fairly I mean this lettuce the place did it come from it you should not have rabbits to you oh yeah i do not like them in any respect I had an experience once with anybody it wasn’t very fine they get into a list with me they usually began to nibble at my scape and and the whole lot is are you will have undoubtedly nothing to fear about your grace no that is just where we am where we grow to – you you develop lettuce indoors in a cage it is safer you already know i am nobody can steal asunder well loved it brightens up the room and coolant is this that is them caviar caviar yes good it is not day-to-day we have now a bishop round so now we have helped me get the caviar out correct so what you may have carried out is you’ve unfold some caviar down there so i will get down on my arms and knees and ease off the floor yes what do you think i’m naturally a pony run to my bed I just put them google toboni hahaha a rather dependable head worry nothing guess it can be virtually like the form of place you wouldn’t even suppose of god I have no idea oh that small room in the back of the kitchen the bloodless cellar I received the shed no hope it’s not the shed come on Ted consider about it the place’s the final position you’d suppose I taught them good the final position I believe it’s put them would be and would surely be Bishop Brennan’s room bingo pirated I put the bunnies within the final position he’d ever assume to find it in his possess room he’d under no circumstances looked there you are excellent you’re correct relatively really what is this now I just would not say the entire bishop thing their situation yeah I mean you could have bought to get plenty of this I just wish to say you know well executed I mean we’re taught a person from Limerick would get this bar all of the ones you studied inside the seminary the entire different monks they they need to be feeling pretty in poor health on the second they ought to be looking on the television and long past cut how did that incredibly it you trap me you’re busy but it surely’s now not it’s me no person eivol said you’ve gotten a variety of a bishop iere about yourself i do know I just like to say am i able to shake our hand well carried out rather commit to me I hate you so all that suggests certainly nothing to me keep on downstairs what happened would you suppose I simply fell down the stairs there the place are you’re you injured I do not know why somewhat twinge all correct my arm I can’t move and if you need somebody to call an ambulance i do know I believe it’s just no longer right here for a while that is mostly the quality thing for me now we are retired for the relaxation yeah then oh oh did see a documentary in regards to the Russian i know who the top is atomic bomb to take action much harm i’ll mattress naturally i’m okay speak up and discover thank then you definitely find a rabbit What did he say do not appear I gotta let you know i’m he name me however you handle me by my correct title you little bollocks man Brennan what’s he on about now huh god is aware of what the opposite not now doing at the aegis i am nonetheless asking mr.Bishop finds out you are omit bliss we’re going first white I identical to to move to the bathroom all of the different toys within the condo are broken it is just quantity one i do not work in any respect oh I needed that but there isn’t a rest room in right here God John where are they they’re now not in there we’re gonna understand that may be a fully rabbit free subject good I undoubtedly put them in there Ted wait a minute Jack’s room possibly the odor of them and have got to see him one last time believe you might be putting that in a somewhat over romantic method Duggal ebook excellent wager come on safeguard over your proper maintain them right here how do they get in essentially the most erotic no rabbit good we now have student shifts get them out the husband’s some distance away of positive why can’t we simply depart them here seeing that Dougal my nerves are shot I will not be able to relax except the one rabbits left is the one sitting in your head working the controls copper’s is aware of more in right here look at this one we look like that fella and harvey keitel blissful content material long gone Google how would a rabbit look like God Almighty anyway do many types of persons matters like that hello the monies are gone oh god the place’s Jackie oh my god not the bishops rope come on do it do not wager possibly you could come on come on only a unhealthy dream you are excellent you