#OMG ANON WHAT DID YOU MAKE ME DO????? it's almost 3k now... what even....

[lovecanbesostrange]

#is it too late to write 2k words of how Ruby stays chained up and turns and she's in control yet scared but Belle stays with her NO!!! It is never too late for red beauty content

Is this a dare or are you just mocking me?

But, well, okay, let's go back to that night in the library then, shall we?

(under a read more, but also up on AO3 now)

Ruby frantically went through the rooms, making sure all the windows were shut, nobody else was here and she knew the layout of the place. But Belle was still here, that was not good. She needed to go, lock the main entrance from the outside.

"You need to leave. The moon's going to be up soon."

Belle didn't made any effort to go, instead she followed Ruby around. "But will the chains hold?"

"Hopefully." Like a familiar tune another conversation about chains played out in Ruby's head. Familiar and devastating. Those chains did hold. But only because they held a human back, leaving him defenseless.

"Then, I'm staying." Belle's determined tone stopped Ruby in her tracks. She was so upbeat and positive, as if this wasn't about a beast showing up any minute, who could tear her to shreds. Belle reached out, not just mentally, but physically now. Ruby felt the hands on her shoulders, a gesture to spark comfort. "Think of it as girls' night."

Ruby was at a loss for words. Belle was so cheery about all of this. So unfazed by the horror of the situation. Was this how Peter had seen her? When she convinced him he might be the wolf and he was ready to be tied up and send her away, but Red had stayed with him. Unintentionally dooming him to a grim death. Red had felt the same determination to stay with him that Belle showcased now. It was such a weird switch in perspectives. Except Ruby knew much, much better now.

Slowly Ruby backed away, breaking contact with Belle, who finally showed concern, but not in the way Ruby wanted. "What's wrong?"

How could Ruby explain all of this? The way her heart ached, because of a lost love, a life taken and now also because this thing might happen again. May have in fact happened again. Belle hadn't seen Billy's body. Belle didn't know how easily werewolf fangs tore human bodies in half. Belle didn't know that deep inside of Ruby a monster lurked. And that every bit of self-doubt made it stronger. That only self-acceptance could tame it and Ruby had run out of that this morning in front of the cannery. Why was she the only one that was afraid?

"I know David wants to believe the best, but I've killed before, and I'll do it again." Ruby picked up the chains, the rattling sound a faint promise of safety. "Everyone in this town is right to be afraid of me."

"Okay, well I'm not."

"You should be!" Ruby almost yelled back instantly. How did Belle not understand this? This was about her life! People outside gathered in a mob to hunt for a wolf and they were right. Because if Ruby had killed Billy, the sweet mechanic who always smiled and was up for a chat, then anybody could be next.

But Belle didn't budge. She didn't give in a single inch and Ruby stared at her. Trying to figure out what to do. "No matter what you might've done in your past, David sees the good in you and-" A slight pause, Belle's face was perfectly calm, her eyes warm and her lips twitched into a reassuring half-smile for a second. Just looking at her twisted Ruby's inside. "And that tells me one thing."

"What?" She was skeptical, because Belle didn't listen to reason, making up her own theories here. Ruby had on of the cuffs in her hand. Thinking back to Peter a thought formed. He would have been safe if Red had gone away. Maybe this was how she could keep Belle from getting hurt. Put this on her and leave. The building was secure. And the people outside took the risk serious enough to end the threat once and for all.

"That it's in there." Belle kept going, while taking a step forward. Stepping into Ruby's personal space again, closing this gap to show how serious she was about not being afraid. "So if we can all see it, why can't you?"

"You really think so?" All Ruby wanted was to believe Belle. Believe in her kind words, her trust that the wolf wasn't the problem.

"Trust me. I'm sort of an expert when it comes to rehabilitation."

Ruby looked at Belle. Her face. The utter and unfaltering support. The way her eyebrows moved, the corner of her mouth pulling up radiating optimism and just those gentle eyes.

"Maybe. Maybe you're right." Ruby played with the cuff. Now or never. She could leave Belle to safety and make a run for it. She deserved whatever the mob had in store for her.

But under Belle's gaze she faltered. For a split second she wanted to believe her so much, that she closed the cuff around her own wrist. She had only met this type of kindness once before and it overwrote her will towards self-destruction long enough to change her course of action.

"But you do need to leave." Ruby closed the second cuff and pulled at the chains a bit, the weight was noticeable, but she was worried if the pipe was sturdy enough.

Belle smiled. "I'm staying and now you can't throw me out anyway." She took Ruby's hands into her own. "I'll get you through this. And tomorrow you'll see that you worried for nothing. David will find out the truth."

Ruby ground her teeth. It was too late now. She could only hope history was not about to repeat itself. The literal hand-holding was maybe too much, but it had a calming effect. Ruby was not alone, even though she should be, while also not wanting to be. This whole day had taken a lot of energy from her and it was nice to surrender for a moment. But she needed to focus and let go of Belle.

When Ruby grabbed the other cuffs that were supposed to go around her ankles, Belle intervened.

"Wait, you need to straighten those out first, they're all twisted. You'll make it worse for yourself."

"That's kinda the point."

Again Belle gave her that sympathetic half-smile. "The point is to keep you locked up, not to strangle yourself. I have had my share of uncomfortable nights in chains."

Under any other circumstances Ruby would have a question about that, but she only stood there and let Belle straighten out the chains like christmas lights. She then knelt down to put the cuffs on. All Ruby did was raiser her feet one after the other a bit to help.

"All set?", Belle asked.

Ruby yanked at the chains, the pipes didn't give in. And the chain connecting her wrists and ankles now restrained her movement. The wolf would not be able to make huge leaps in those, even if it broke loose. She leaned against the wall and slowly glided down. "The last one around me, please?"

Now she had to look up at Belle and her stomach turned once more. Was this how Peter had felt? She remembered vividly helping him into the chains, securing him against the tree. Both believing it was the right thing to do. She remembered her love for him and the trust he wouldn't hurt her. Like Belle trusted her now contrary to all evidence.

A bit of shame rose up in Ruby, battling with her nervousness. She had given Belle a crash-course in everyday life in Storybrooke, but avoided any question about her pre-curse persona. And now here they were. Because of the wolf. If she had warned Belle from the start, she wouldn't be so insistent now on helping and staying. She wouldn't be crawling around on the floor of her library to fasten chains around Ruby.

"Done." Belle squatted in front of her.

Ruby had pulled her knees up to her chin and hugged her legs. "Please go?" It was more of a question than a request and Ruby knew the answer already anyway. Because Peter had said the same. And she had stayed. For him.

Belle cocked her head to the side, rubbing Ruby's leg for a moment. "I'm responsible for what happens in the library. And if my friend is chained up in here, I'm responsible for her, too." She brushed a strand of Ruby's hair behind her ear and locked eyes.

Ruby took a deep breath in. She could feel the beast creeping closer, the moon was rising. "But get back. Get to the door." She mustered every ounce of command she could. "You have to!"

Belle got up and stepped away. She made her way to the main entrance backwards, never taking her eyes off of Ruby. And Ruby felt exposed. It was time. The beast was near. The wolf wanted out. What was it that made her black out last night? She had been in the freezer and woken up in the woods. She remembered nervous pacing and endless worry. She had rejected the reality of what was happening. The thing Anita had warned her about.

The wolf was her, she was the wolf. Different, but the same. She was the beast, with fangs and claws and animal instincts. All of that monstrous potential. It was all her. All a part of her. Under her control.

Ruby turned. Her senses grew sharper, the noises and smells that already had been loud and clear, became more distinct. The strength that put her above normal humans was now fitted with all the right muscles. And there was an immediate need to move, to run, to use those muscles and to get outside. A want for fresh air and dirt under her paws.

Ruby threw herself against the chains and let out a howl. Belle had to press her hands against her ears, because the closed space wasn't the best place for such a noise. But the howl turned into a low whine, when Ruby kept struggling. The cuffs cut into the skin, not fitting her legs as well as a minute ago. And the chain around her body kept her from any decent movement. She was trapped. This was terrible. And Ruby panicked.

Deep down she knew this was what she had wanted. To be tied up in a way that would not allow her to escape. But the craving for freedom in her wolf form was far stronger than any human reason. This was the thing with being a wolf. Some things felt different.

"Ruby?"

Belle's voice reached her as she tried to get up on all four paws, but the chain yanking her back towards the wall.

"Ruby? Are you okay?"

Ruby barked. Once. A warning. She couldn't come closer! She growled, but also tried to retreat, she needed to make sure she was far away from Belle, right? This was her friend, she was in danger from something. Ruby needed to stay away.

When Belle stopped moving so did Ruby. She looked at her. If she stayed away all was right. Nothing bad would happen. If she stayed still herself Belle was safe. Ruby tried another approach and tried to lie down. The chains pressed against her body in various spots, but she managed. She pulled her ears back, flattened herself as best as she could and whined.

"Ruby?"

She only moved her ears in confirmation. Belle's face spelt surprise. But Ruby couldn't read if it was a good or a bad thing.

"I get it now, where the big part in big bad wolf comes from." Ruby growled and bared her teeth for a second. "No, no, you're not bad. Definitely not bad. But kinda big." Her furrowed brow smoothed out and she put a smile back on. "You are a big wolf. And I don't think that's the same as being a monster."

Ruby pointedly turned her head, not looking at Belle anymore. But she could hear her sitting down. And then a few moments of silence. Until a soft rustle piqued her interest. Belle was pulling out books from the shelf she leaned against.

"Sorry, I'm still reorganizing things. Some of these shelves don't make any sense to me." Her eyes darted over the back of a few books, skimming the contents. "The good thing is there is lots to discover I have never heard of." She held up a thick volume. "Here, an anthology with short stories and I don't even know any of these writers. Bradbury, Vonnegut, Ellison, Le Guin. Any of these names mean something to you?"

Ruby dared a quick tail wag, because buried in her false memories was reading Fahrenheit 451 as a school assignment. Belle put the book down and pulled out a much thinner one.

"The Last Unicorn." Ruby lifted her head. "Oh, someone we know? Maybe I should take that into consideration. Rearranging the fairy-tales and stories with people we've met."

She opened the book and started to read. "The unicorn lived in a lilac wood, and she lived all alone. She was very old, though she did not know it, and she was no longer the careless color of sea foam but rather the color of snow falling on a moonlit night. But her eyes were still clear and unwearied, and she still moved like a shadow on the sea." Belle had a soothing tone that made Ruby forget the cuffs cutting into her skin, the chains hindering her from moving and biting into her body. She wasn't supposed to be comfortable. And Belle wasn't supposed to be here and definitely not reading to her.

There were people outside hunting for a bloodthirsty wolf and yet, Ruby was inside, hidden away, listening to the story of a lonely creature searching for her family. Belle looked up every so often, giving different voices to the characters and making facial impressions, but not disturbing the flow with comments on the plot. Ruby was too focused on her that she didn't even hear footsteps coming closer and she was startled when the door to the library was pushed open.

"We've got it!" David shouted, holding up Ruby's red signature cloak. "And you're cleared. It was all Spencer."

Granny followed, still some fury on her face. "He tried to frame you, so David would look bad. But we got him." Granny's grin gave away that she had used the crossbow in her hand.

"That's fantastic," Belle said as she got up. "See, no need to worry."

"Everything okay in here?", David asked when he slowed down as he approached Ruby.

"Nothing happened. I don't think she even needed the chains."

David threw the cloak over Ruby and the second she turned back, she hugged him. "Thank you, David."

"No, thank you for not doing something reckless. I've told you, I believe in you."

They both know the thing that wasn't said in this moment. That Snow had believed in her first and if she had been here, things would have been different. And with that Ruby noticed that David was holding back something else.

"What happened?"

"We can talk about that tomorrow." His smile wasn't completely genuine, but Ruby let it slide. She felt a weight lift off of her chest. Literally, because Belle had opened the lock on the chain keeping her down. David held out a hand to help her get up.

He stepped back. "I have to get back to Henry."

Ruby tried to pull the cloak tighter, but the chains prevented it and Belle took her hands. Again. "Let me." She held up the key. "This is the best part." And for what felt like the first time in years, but it had probably been only a day, Ruby smiled back at her.

When the chains fell down she immediately hugged Belle. All the worries about keeping a safe distance forgotten. The beast had been contained, in fact there was no beast to fear at all and her friend had stayed through it all. How lucky to have friends who believed in her more than she did herself.

Granny cleared her throat. "Are you coming home or are you going for a midnight run, now?"

Ruby looked at her over Belle's shoulder, still holding on and enjoying the way Belle hugged back firmly. "Run", was her simple answer.

And as sudden as they had come in, David and Granny vanished again, leaving the two alone.

"A midnight run?", Belle asked as she put the books back on the shelf, except for The Last Unicorn.

"Yes. That's all I could think about."

"And you remember everything that happened, while...", she gestured to where Ruby had been lying down so miserably.

The self-consciousness returned. "I hope I didn't scare you."

Belle laughed. "I was only scared for you, not of you. That looked unpleasant." She pouted.

"It was." Ruby picked up the book and thumbed through the pages, trying to find where they had left off and put a piece of paper in almost halfway through. "Will you read the rest to me?"

Belle took the book from her, lingering a bit when their fingers brushed. "I wanna know how this ends."

"This?"

"It. How it ends."

Ruby had seen a flashlight in the utility room earlier and quickly picked it up. "So, you want to join me?" She offered it to Belle. "A stroll through the woods?"

This night there was a wolf running around the woods surrounding Storybrooke. Circling around a woman wearing the well-knows red riding hood. When Belle sat down, Ruby put her head on her legs, enjoying a scratch between the ears and listening to the rest of the story. Maybe there was hope for finding companions when you thought you were the only one of your kind.

[differentkettleoffishalltogether]

Show Me [Part 1/2]

Summary: Spencer finds out his girlfriend’s a virgin. But she wants him to change that.

A/N: This is an anon request that I loved writing. This is Part 1 and I’m working on Part 2 right now! If you like this and wanna read some more of my stuff check out my Masterlist, or my series, I’m On Fire.

Pairing: Spencer Reid x Fem!Reader

Category: Mostly smut, and a lil fluff

Warnings/Includes: smut, graphic descriptions of sexual acts, oral (male receiving), fingering, slight hair pulling, please let me know if there’s anything I’ve missed!

Word count: 3k

Request: “Omg I’ve just found your account, you’re an amazing writer! If you’re taking requests, could you write something with virgin!reader and like season 13/14 Spencer?”

Read Part 2 Here

They’ve never had sex.

They’ve kissed though. They’ve kissed so much it made Spencer feel like a teenager, well what he assumed it was like to be a regular teenager.

They’d kiss everywhere they could, in his bed, in her bed, in his kitchen, in the car, in hotel rooms, one time in a supply closet at the BAU. But mostly they ended up on Spencer’s couch. The first time they did anything more than just kissing was on Spencer’s couch, it wasn’t exactly planned it just, happened.

They were making out and she was lying beneath him, there was a sort of comfort in the feeling of his weight on top of her, keeping her fixed beneath him. She’d worn a pretty short dress for their date earlier, one she knew Spencer liked, but after all of the squirming and moving it just sort of rode up.

She didn’t feel it happening but when Spencer came up for air and looked down at her, all he could see was the skirt of her dress, bunched up around her waist, and the little pink panties she had on underneath, absolutely soaking wet.

He let out a small chuckle, looking back up at her, “Have you been wet this entire time?” he smirked.

She doesn’t think too hard about it. She’s so turned on by the way he looks right now, his hooded eyes and his softly parted pink lips are so distracting that she forgets he’s never seen her like this before and she nods.

“Mmhmm” she hums, and bites her lip in anticipation of his next move.

“Can I touch you?” he asks, soft and gentle and she nods again, a little too shy to do much else.

He starts by touching her above her underwear, pushing against the cotton, moving it around between her folds with one finger. She was already moaning and writhing beneath him with that simple touch.

When he tucked a finger inside of her panties he shouldn’t have been shocked but he was. She was so wet, almost screaming in pleasure below him and he’d only grazed her clit once or twice. He thought she might combust when he sunk just one finger into her and she was so tight and clenched around the digit. Squirming even when he was motionless inside of her.

It wouldn’t have taken long to actually make her cum, that was obvious. But he was having so much fun with it that he decided to drag this out for as long as he could. Bringing her to the edge over and over until she was literally begging him for release. By the end of it she was completely spent, her arousal coating her thighs, his hands, and a little of the couch. He took off her panties and stashed them in his pocket and she really wished she didn’t find that quite as hot as she did.

He doesn’t want to test her limits again right away, he wants her to come to him when she's ready. But it doesn’t happen again for a while. They go back to their usual dance, making out like teenagers, sometimes for hours until the point when one of them has to leave, or sleep, or they’re both called away on a case.

It’s not until a whole month has passed that things change again.

Y/N sneaks into Spencer’s room one night while they’re out on a case. He’s a little shocked to see her but he’s happy none the less. What’s shocking him more than anything is the skimpy little nightdress she’s got on, and how more notably it seems like she’s not wearing a bra underneath it.

“What are you doing?” he asks when he opens the door to her, and what he wants to say is ‘you can’t be out in the halls looking like this’, and what he really means by that is, ‘you can’t be in my room looking like this because I’ll never recover’.

“Can I come in?” she asks softly, and almost a little worried, so he steps aside to let her in.

They sit on the edge of his bed, her posture is rigid as she sits, and she takes in a deep breath before she speaks again.

“Do you like the way that I look?” she asks, tentative, and his heart just about breaks. Of course he did. He had since the second he laid eyes on her.

“Yes, oh my god. You’re the prettiest girl I think I’ve ever seen?” he rushes out, his hand reaching out to touch her bare shoulder in a comforting gesture. But she doesn’t look relieved or satisfied by the admission.

“But do you—” she braces herself, “do you think I'm sexy?”

He’s got no idea what’s happening, if she didn’t look so serious he’d think this was some kind of joke. “Are you serious?” he gasps, “Are you kidding me?” he hops off the bed and sinks to his knees in front of her.

“I don’t know how I got so lucky. You’re the prettiest, sexiest, woman I’ve ever laid eyes on.” he tries to reassure, placing his hands on her knees and looking up at her.

“Then why don’t we—” she’s not even sure what she’s trying to ask, “Why do we only kiss? Don’t you want to...” she trails off, and there’s something endearing about the way she can’t even seem to bring herself to say any explicit words out loud.

“Don’t I want to sleep with you?” he guesses, knowing it’s the right answer, “Y/N, I want to sleep with you so, so badly. I think about it all the time.” he confesses and her eyes blow wide.

“You do?”

He nods eagerly, “All. The. Time.” he emphasizes, “When you play with your hair in work, when you fall asleep on my lap while we’re watching a movie, when you kiss me for hours, when you bite your lip while you’re concentrating, when you wear that little navy pencil skirt, when you show up to my hotel room dressed like this” he gestures to her nightdress, “or when I think about your little pink panties in the top drawer of my nightstand” he whispers the last part.

“I just thought…” she searches for the end of the sentence, “I thought you didn’t want to?” she pouts.

“I thought you weren’t ready” he says it so earnest, and he means it. He’d never want to make her feel like it wasn’t her choice.

“I haven’t— I’ve never— I’m a virgin Spencer.” she confesses, and she doesn’t look at him while she does, too shy from the admission.

“That’s okay” he moves his hands up to grab hers gently, gazing up at her with nothing but adoration in his eyes, “I don’t want you to do anything you don’t want to do”

“But I want to, with you” she looks at him now and her gaze is so soft that he melts.

“I want to as well. But not here.” he sits back up on the bed next to her, “It shouldn’t be in some cheap motel with our co-workers down the hall. We can do it at my place, or yours, or we could book an actual nice hotel room in the city somewhere? Whatever you want.” she nods at him and smiles.

“I’d like that a lot” she looks happy now, content and relieved, “but could we maybe still do something now?”

He’s taken aback completely, “Did you have something in mind?”

She looks shy again, and he has to coax it out of her, squeezing her hands in his and giving her an encouraging kiss on the cheek.

“When you touched me on your couch that time. I wanted to do something for you, but I wasn’t sure— I didn’t want to get it wrong so I just chickened out” she admits.

“What did you want to do?” he pries gently.

“I wanted to use my mouth” she breaks eye contact when she speaks. He can’t take it anymore so he tilts her head softly with one of his hands so she has to look directly at him again.

“You wanted to use your mouth on what?” he’s doing it on purpose to get her out of her shell.

“On your— on your cock” she whispers out like she's embarrassed to even say it at full volume.

“You wanted to suck my cock?” he asks and she can feel the heat rising in her cheeks as she nods.

“Please?” she asks, and he never thought he'd have a girl this beautiful asking him if she could ‘please’ suck his cock. How did he get this lucky?

“Only if you want to”

“I really do” she volunteers, “but I need you to tell me… how?”

“So you’ve never done it before?” he asks, he’s been aware she was a virgin but he’s got no idea what she had or hadn’t done before. She shakes her head.

“When you, touched me, that was the first time anyone other than me had well…”

“And you’ve never touched anyone else?” he asks, soft and sweet, rubbing his thumb over and back on the top of her hand.

“I have.” she says, “With other boys when I was younger but never anything more”

“Okay” he says encouraging.

“How do we start?” she looks less nervous now that it’s all out in the open.

“Like we always do” he breaks out in a smile as he leans in to kiss her. Her lips are so soft against his, perfect as always.

He pulls her toward him and parts their lips long enough to tell her to sit on his lap. She obliges, she loves to sit like this while they kiss, he knows that too. Sitting this way she can feel him as he starts to grow hard beneath her, only the thin fabric of his boxers keeping him from her.

His hands hold onto her thighs, digging his fingernails into the sides of them as she moans into his mouth. He chances moving one of his hands up her side, and as he hovers it above her chest he breaks apart from her for just a moment. “Can I?” he asks, and she nods before he places a hand on her breast over the fabric of her nightdress. And he knew she wasn’t wearing a bra.

He couldn't stop himself from bringing the other hand up so he could cup both breasts. Massaging and kneading them, feeling her nipples begin to harden and stand out from the satin fabric.

She grinds down against him momentarily and her eyes grow wide. “Are you?” she looks down between them, clearly feeling him.

“I’m hard Y/N” he says softly, and she looks almost giddy.

“I’m ready” she breathes out and swings off his lap, taking charge now that she’d worked up some confidence. It’s not like she had no idea what to do. She’s watched porn, she’s read a few things about it, but she also knew there was no way to really know what it was like without actually doing it.

She kneels down in front of him, pulling apart his knees so that she can nestle down in between them. She’s the one that pulls down the waistband of his boxers, just far enough so that she can pull his cock out.

She feels stupid in a way. She hadn’t given much thought to how it would look but it was different to what she’d anticipated. It was flushed pink, and leaking from the tip. And it was bigger, or thicker maybe, than she’d been expecting. She had a vibrator at home and it didn’t look like this. For one thing it was purple, but it was also smaller than this. For a moment she's nervous before she realizes that this is Spencer. And she could never feel nervous with him.

“Is everything alright? If you’ve changed your mind—” he starts and she shakes her head probably a bit too vigorously.

“No! It’s just— bigger, than I was expecting” she says holding it loosely in her hand.

“Oh” he says, unable to his his surprise, “thank you?” She giggles at him, unaware she’d actually been paying him a compliment.

“What do you like?” She asks, peering up at him and fluttering her eyelashes like she’d done this a million times before.

“Well, um,” he’s the one with the shaky breath now, and he’s not sure when he got so nervous, “I guess if you lick it first, that always feels good” he’s barely got the sentence out and she’s on him. Licking a long stripe up the underside of his cock, right along the vein, reaching the tip and swiping up the pre-cum leaking from the slit there. He’s got to struggle not to throw his head back in pleasure instantly, he wants to see it, wants to watch all of it.

She takes her mouth off of him and looks up with those doe eyes again, and now that he’s looking he can see down her nightdress. He’s got a perfect view of her perky nipples, turned on beneath the fabric and his dick twitches at the sight.

“Like that?” she pulls off him to ask, and he can barely breathe.

“Fuck Y/N! Exactly like that” he groans, chest heaving, his hands clawing at the duvet.

She smiles up at him, “and then what?”

“Uh, take it in your mouth, you don't have to take it the whole way down, just as far as you feel comfortable with” he assures her, trying to steady out his breathing. He doesn’t want her to gag or anything. “then just use your hands for the rest.”

She nods, thinking for a moment before bringing her mouth back down to him. This time she licks him again, all the way up and around the tip, just a little slower than before. Then she wraps her plush lips around the head of his cock. He moans louder than he meant to as she starts to sink down on him, further and further, taking him in inch by inch.

She didn't quite get the whole way down but she got way further than he thought she would. Taking in as much of him as she could she began to rise up again. It took a little adjusting to make sure she was breathing in and out through her nose, but once she got the hang of it she began to pick up the pace.

Sliding up and down against him, the feeling of her warm, wet mouth was almost too much. He’d gotten himself off to thoughts of her for months now and it just didn’t compare. Not by a long shot, he knew he wasn’t going to last much longer.

She stopped after another minute and looked up at him, “Is it okay? Does it feel good?” she asks, unsure.

“Jesus, fuck. Y/N, it feels so good. You feel so good” he gasps and she looks delighted.

“Would you, maybe, put your hands in my hair?” she asks, a little nervous, and he’s shocked for what feels like the 100th time this evening, “I like how it feels” she says, shy and unsure. So he sits forward, leaning down a little so he can take her face in his hands.

“How did I get so lucky?” he plants a kiss on her lips and moves his hands from the side of her face into her hair. Gathering it up into a ponytail and gripping it firmly. She lowers down again, wrapping her lips around the head once more and sinking down. Bolstered by his compliments and ignoring her nerves she forces herself to sink further down on him this time. Taking him as deep as she possibly can until she can feel him hit the back of her throat for the briefest moment before she has to pull back.

But the strangled moan that he lets out when she’s got him that far down is so gorgeous that it might be the only noise she ever wants to hear again.

He pulls at her hair roughly as she starts to move faster and faster, and she moans at the feeling. The vibrations she creates around his cock just make him pull even harder, letting out some of the pent up tension.

“Fuck, Y/N, I’m so close. You can stop.” he forces out with shallow breaths, but she doesn’t budge. He tries to pull her off him using his grip on her hair but she resists, and she just keeps on moving. Up and down his length, taking down as much of him as possible on each stroke.

“Fuckkkk” he moans out as he releases, and he can feel it pumping into her throat as she swallows around him.

When she pulls off, and she’s looking up to him for approval, her eyes wide, her lips and chin coated in spit and cum as it drips down, he knows without a doubt that she’s the sexiest thing he’s ever laid eyes on.

“Was that okay?” she asks hopeful.

“Was that okay?” he rushes out in disbelief, “Get up here.” he helps her off her knees and pulls her onto his lap again, holding her close. “I can’t believe you.” he shakes his head and pulls her in for a sloppy kiss, he can taste himself on her tongue as they mold together.

“That was perfect, beyond perfect, fuck” he wipes her chin with his thumb, it doesn’t do much but it’s a gesture.

“Are you okay?” he asks softly, brushing her hair back with his hands, and she’s just looking at him, beaming.

“I liked it” she says, like she can’t really believe just how much she enjoyed herself, “I can’t wait to learn more.”

Read Part 2 Here

Masterlist

Permanent Taglist:

@pinkdiamond1016​

@shadyladyperfection​

@leeezie

[clairecrive]

Billy idea that I have no time to write myself loool: reader and Billy are friends with benefits. Reader is happy with the arrangement and knows Billy is sleeping with other women but she doesn't care. It's not serious with them. Billy however hadn't really thought about Reader sleeping with other people and he finds out. Maybe from friends (Frank, Curtis and Karen because hello AU) or maybe all of them are out at a bar and he sees her go home with someone else? But he gets suuuuper jealous about it and realises he wants more. I'll leave it up to you if Reader wants more too. Angsty jealous Billy though, am I right? Lmaooo (this is faulty-coding btw, hello 🖤)

"Commitment"

A/N: omg hi! I love your work so much I feel incredibly honoured that you chose me for this request! I hope you like it x This is also for this anon, I've combined the two requests since they were similar.

Warnings: angst, jealousy, slut-shaming, hurt-comfort, smut at the end

Word count: 3K +

Tags:@blackst0nes7077, @thefictionalgemini, @tarkanelima-blog

@pansysgirlfriend, @acciorudolphx @supernaturalcat7, @crazyclownchick (I don't know why it won't let me tag you)

To add yourself to my taglist, fill in this form.

NAVIGATION PAGE

"Hey, stranger." A familiar voice and then his familiar touch on your back before he sat in front of you.

"Hi, Billy."

"it's been a while," he mentioned casually while his eyes took you in.

It had been more than a while, actually. Last time you saw Billy had been over a week ago. Well, you hadn't really seen him, that was the problem.

Ever since you had started your "agreement" you'd drop by his office from time to time to surprise him. He had told you that he deeply enjoyed office sex while you had never had it. Needless to say, it soon became one of your favourite things.

And that was why that day, you were at Anvil. You hadn't told Billy that you were coming. It wouldn't have been a surprise then, would it? However, when you stepped in front of his door, just one touch away from opening it, you heard it.

Well, heard her actually.

It was Billy that ended up surprising you that day. You usually loved surprises but that one you would have gladly skipped.

Although it had taken you most of a week to come to this realisation, you realized that it was actually a good thing to happen. The thing you had with Billy wasn't labelled. It was fun but it wasn't serious. Despite the fact that you were friends and hang out with the same group, you had never committed to each other.

And you were honestly fine with it. You enjoyed your time with Billy, outside and under the sheets.

It had been months though and you hadn't wanted to acknowledge it but it wasn't enough anymore. Billy's role in your life was ambiguous. He was your friend sure, but one you'd have sex with. He wasn't your boyfriend but he was the one you'd spend the most of your time with, the one with whom you were intimate.

You wanted more, you realized. Enough with these half measures.

Billy will understand, you told yourself. He inwardly made it clear where he stands. Time to broaden your horizons.

And, as matter of fact, you had. It was true that the ocean is full of fish but you hadn't had a lot of luck with them before. Sure, Jake was nice. He was polite and nice. An overall good guy.

He was just lacking a... je ne sais quoi that made you unsure about it. But you were willing to give him a chance and so you kept going on dates with him.

Needless to say, you hadn't spoken to Billy since that impromptu visit to his office.

"Been busy," you offered him taking a sip of your beer. It was a lame excuse but you couldn't care less. Karen offered you some appetizers. You stared at them for a bit before shaking your head refusing them. Ignoring Karen's questioning look, you took another sip.

"Yeah, she's been busy alright." Frank's low chuckle came from the other end of the table.

"Meaning?" Billy asked, now curious about the implication seeing how your cheeks had suddenly turned red.

"She met someone," Karen chirped in, winking in your direction.

Mentally facepalming you, you swore them off. It wasn't the way you wanted Billy to find out. Not that you cared what he thought since he couldn't be bothered to be as transparent with you, but still. You hated being put on the spot.

"Has she now?" Billy's eyebrow arched and he gave you an amused look. But his jaw clenched and that gave him away.

"Not that it's any of your business. But yes, I have. His name's Jake, he's a nice guy." You explained briefly, ignoring the intensity of his stare.

"So you're that kind of person then." Leaning over the table, his voice took an edge he had never directed at you. "Ditching her friends as soon as she meets a guy?"

"You know that's not true." Narrowing your eyes at him you were almost offended by his institution if it wasn't for the fact that you knew that it was his bruised ego speaking.

"Tell that to my many unanswered calls on your phone."

"That's not on Jake," you scoffed taking a sip. His eyebrow arched while his hands gestured to you as if to say "do tell".

"Let's just say that I saw firsthand just how busy you keep yourself when I'm not around." You tried to keep the bitterness out of your voice, you really did. But without success.

Billy's lips pursed in thought. You had no doubt that he had an inkling about what you meant but he couldn't figure out to what exactly you were referring to.

"So is this what it is? You being petty because I've been with someone else?"

"That's me wanting more for myself and taking it."

"If you were that insatiable, y/n, you should have just told me."

"Stop making me sound like a slut, Billy. That is not what this is about."

"Isn't it? Because that's exactly what this looks like to me."

Pursing your lips, you refused to show him just how much he had hurt you. Nodding your head you decided that you'd had enough. You did not have to sit here and take his bullshit.

"You know, Billy. Slut-shaming isn't a good look on you." Waving to your friends, you quickly told them that you had to go. An emergency you said. But they knew better, their eyes fixed on Billy as he watched you walk out of the bar. Hands tightening around the bottle of beer he had ordered, he stood up once you disappeared amongst the crowd.

Without bothering to explain himself to the group, he simply followed you outside.

"Y/n." He called your name once he saw that you were already a bit far from the bar. In a couple of quick strides, Billy had gotten to you since you had slowed down.

"Go away, Billy." you didn't bother to look at him.

"Wait, wait," he said gently taking hold of your arm to get you to stop. And you did but stared at his hand on you until he dropped it and took a step back. "Look I'm sorry, I was an asshole." he apologised.

You only nodded to show him that you understood him but didn't offer any words to assure him that you forgave him.

"And I'm sorry you had to find out about Madani that way." He added hoping to make things right between you.

"Don't worry, it was actually an awakening for me." You added briefly looking at him. Tone harsh and unapologetic. You were still too mad at him to care about being considerate of your voice.

"Really?"

"Yeah, it made me realize that this," you gestured between the two of you, "was not working out for me."

"Oh really?" now the word had lost every tint of disbelief it had before. It was more like he was challenging you. Like he didn't quite believe you.

"Yes." you stood your ground pushing your shoulders back, "I figured out that I want more. And I know that I'm not going to get that from you."

"It was good while it lasted though," you called over your shoulders as you turned, ready to get the hell away from him. But the words he said though, made you halt on your feet.

"Who said you're not going to get that with me?"

"That would require feeling something for me other than lust, Billy." you snicked not fully turning around to face him, just your head.

"Who says I don't?"

"Madani, maybe?"

"She doesn't mean anything, y/n." He scoffed rolling his eyes.

"Of course you'd say something like this, Billy. Doesn't help though." As if him admitting to having meaningless sex with other women could help his case. Men. Fully done with this conversation you gave him one last look before turning away again.

"I know why you didn't eat those appetizers before." Again, after a few steps, his voice made you stop. This time, the implication of what he meant, sat heavily on your shoulders making you tense. Still, you didn't turn around.

That didn't deter him though.

"I know that you love them but they remind you of your grandfather. He used to make sure there would always be some of those at home whenever you went to visit him. And I know you haven't eaten them since-"

He stopped when your head whipping to him, eyes glaring.

He was right. You knew it, he knew it. But him strumentalising your beloved grandfather's death to get through to you? That was low, even for Billy.

Not only it called for you to acknowledge out loud that your grandfather wasn't there anymore but it also surprised you because you didn't think anyone would notice something so small.

"What are you saying, Billy?" Eyes glossy, like everything someone mentioned him, you tried your best to not let your voice waver.

"What I'm saying is that I care about you, y/n. I care enough to notice things. The tiniest details that you don't even know are there. Like that every time you're reading and something bad happens, you press your hand on your chest over your heart, as if you wanted to stop the pain from coming or something. Or that you always cook whenever you miss your family even if you never say it out loud. Or-"

"I get it Billy." you raised a hand to stop him. "You're observant. I knew that. That's basically what you do for a living. Not counting that you're a fucking sniper."

"Maybe," he conceded slowly taking a step in your direction, "I notice things, that's true. That doesn't mean that I store them in my mind, though."

"I care about you, y/n. A great deal. Enough to notice all the little things that make you you and enough to memorize them."

"I don't know if I can believe you, Billy. If you cared you wouldn't be going around sleeping with other women. And I know-" you added when you saw his mouth open to protest- " I know that technically we weren't together but still Billy. A technicality is not going to earn you my trust." Shrugging your shoulders you opted for being honest with him. You had never lied to him and you certainly weren't going to start now. Billy had never lied to you either, not that you were aware. And even if this thought should have reassured you, you were still hesitant about believing him.

"Then give me a chance to do so. Let me prove to you just how much I care about you and how little I care about everything else." He insisted, taking another step and then another until he was in front of you. Hands on your jaw, he delicately craned your neck so that your eyes could meet.

The height difference had always been a reason for jokes among you. It was no secret that Billy had a slight size kink, at least not to you, and so more often than not he'd use that.

Thumb slowly caressing your jaw, his eyes flickered between yours. They were full of hope, of promises but there was also a lot of vulnerability. Billy was not the type to be so forthcoming about his feelings. The fact that he had been with you, on a side street nonetheless, was a demonstration on its own.

Sighing, you knew you needed to decide. Yes, hearing Billy having sex with another woman had hurt you but you were not together. While that didn't make it hurt any less, it made the situation slightly less grave. He hadn't cheated on you, not really. You hadn't told him you wanted more. Hell, before that you didn't even know that you wanted more.

And now that you knew, now that he knew as well, here he was promising it to you. He wanted to give you exactly what you wanted. So could you really say no to him?

Of course not.

"Alright."

"Yeah?" a big smile grew on his face, his eyes twinkling in joy.

"Yeah, I'm going to give you a chance. Only one, Billy. So you better not mess this up." Poking his chest with a finger you warned him that this time around, things were going to be different.

"You're not going to regret that, babe." His eyes held a solemn promise. Just briefly though because soon, they were back to their usual mischief. Billy leaned to you, his lips meeting yours in a small kiss.

At first.

He kissed you soundly, his mouth perfectly on yours, building his tempo slowly. Then, you felt his tongue on your lower lip and you knew that things were about to escalate quickly.

Not that you minded of course, but it was not appropriate to do what you had in mind in the middle of the street.

"Billy," you moaned slightly leaning back to warn him that you couldn't get too carried away.

"Call that Jim guy," his mouth peppered small kisses along your jaw, "tell him that it's over. That he never stood a chance," he moved down on your neck.

"Yes."

"Let's go home so that I can show you how much more I can give you."His mouth had trailed back up and stopped so that it was hovering over your ear. His voice was low and breathy and husky and fuck it sent a wave of pleasure right in between your legs.

------

No sooner had you stepped over your threshold than Billy's hands were on you. The door barely closed, he pushed you against it. His hands cradled your face, effectively keeping you holding you in place while his mouth ravished you.

You gladly let him do as he pleased. Mouth opening to welcome his tongue while your hands gripped his jacket to keep you steady.

"Billy," you whimpered his name as his lips left yours. You tried to follow them by getting on your tiptoes but he didn't let you. Chuckling, he gave you another small kiss.

"Yes. Remember that it's me that it's making you feel this good. Me. Not Jim or whatever his name is, not anyone else. Me." He growled on your lips while one of his hands gripped the hair at the nape of your neck making you gasp.

Staring at his glowing dark pits you couldn't do anything other than nodding feverishly. You were at his mercy. Completely. And Billy knew that and it did nothing but please him to no end.

You'd always enjoyed whenever Billy was rough with you but him being jealous and kinda possessive too? Game changer.

Smirking at your reaction, his hands moved lower on your body until they hatched behind your knees pulling you up. Biting your lower lip, he swallowed your whimper for the friction once you wrapped your legs around his waist.

Billy didn't waste any more time, in quick long strides he was in your bedroom and threw you on the bed. You'd almost giggled when you bounced on it if it wasn't for the savage look in Billy's eyes.

Fuck, he looked so sexy. A sin.

For a moment, he just stared at you laid there waiting for him. A hand quickly wiped his face before he unbuckled his pants. Now it was your turn to stare at him. More like ogle but you knew he didn't mind.

Shedding his pants, he crawled over you until his face levelled yours.

"I'm going to give you exactly what you want. And then some more." He promised, nipping your earlobe. "You're never going to feel the need to look for other guys."

"There's no one else I'd rather be with, Billy."

Your hands trailed over his still clothed back before tangling his always perfectly styled hair. "Only you." You whispered in his ear.

If it wasn't for your hand on his back, you would have missed him tensing. "Say it again," he demanded, his head still in the crook of your neck.

"You're the only one I want, Billy." You repeated knowing fully well how he struggled with accepting love and affection. This meant to him just as much as it did to you. He was giving you the promise of commitment but so were you. And despite the fact that you had already been loyal to him, you knew how important it was for him to hear the words.

"There's no one else for me either, y/n. Never was, never will be." He raised his head to say this. It was a confirmation, yes, but it also felt so much more coming from him.

He had been telling you how much he cared about you since you left the bar but somehow, him saying it again now held more meaning.

"You promise?"

You felt childish and it was probably pathetic of you to ask him again. But this was you being vulnerable, letting him know that you needed him. And you trusted Billy.

"You're mine." He said instead. One of his hands coming to cradle the back of your head while the other closed around your right breast.

"And I'm yours."

And here it was, the promise, the reassurance you needed. His lips met yours in a bruising kiss. It was wet and more teeth and tongue than anything but it was passionate. You were claiming each other.

Not separating your lips, he used his hands to get rid of your clothes. While he unbuckled your pants, you took his shirt off. Him doing the same with yours while you pushed his brief down on his legs.

Once you were completely naked, Billy crawled back over you. His hands resting at the sides of your head. He was everywhere. You could feel him between your legs, your arms wrapped around his back, your vision field occupied by his beautiful face.

He was everywhere, he was everything.

"And now, I'm going to leave no room for doubt in your mind anymore." He whispered on your lips, his cock rubbing over your slit teasing you about what was to come.

You had asked him for a commitment and fuck if he didn't commit to it. All night long.

[sunshinexlollipops]

Hello! Just wanted to stop by (hopefully not being a bother) and say I have recently just went through all of your red dead fics on ao3 and wow. I've gotten into a/b/o fics more after reading yours! But also your amidst fic made me feel all types of things, and I know however it ends will leave me messy with f e e l i n g s. And I want to prematurely thank you for those feelings xP. I was also wondering, if that's alright, how your writing process is like? You put in a lot of words in amidst and some of your other fics. Do you make outlines? Do you first write down ideas for a chapter/fic and then draft it out? Are there scenes you add/take out? Is there a length goal you usually set for yourself? You don't have to answer, but I wish you well and thank you for fics that brightened my life a little!

LONG POST!

omg, hello anon! your ask 100% got lost in my notifs, so I just wanna start this off by saying you aren't a bother whatsoever!

in fact: I love receiving asks about my fics, as well as opening up about the writing that takes to get them to you guys!

so I'm gonna start this reply off with a quick thank you about my works! I'm so happy you're enjoying or have enjoyed what I've written.

RDR2/Arthur Morgan is a pleasure to write about, but I've also really enjoyed the fandom. it's been one of the sweetest and most supportive, and I've found one of my best literary periods with you guys! so thank you! :>

but enough pitter patter about that-- let's get to the fun stuff!

since you had a few questions, I'm gonna answer these in a separated list so it'll be easy to follow along! :)

-------

What is your writing process like?

well, in truth anon, I don't exactly have much of one.

that may surprise some, and others not. in truth, I think that sometimes the idea or concept of a "writing process" kind of scares anyone trying to get into writing.

I'm not sure if you are, anon, but your questions just make me want to cover this, just in case.

writing should come to you how it comes. I'm definitely NOT a textbook writer. I don't have a method where I have cardinal rules and a set up I have to have.

I simply embrace when inspiration strikes. usually while listening to music or absorbing some other media. frankly, if you treat writing like a science, you're gonna get stuck. it isn't an issue you have to fix, or a challenge you have to tackle.

allow yourself to get comfortable and just think whatever comes your way mentally. even if you think an idea is bad, encourage it! you can't write if you don't let yourself think.

so for me, I suppose my "process" is just encouraging my writing and for my brain to pop out ideas or scenes. just write away and see where it takes you!

You use a lot of words-- do you outline by chance?

ah yes. I am a wordy potato, frankly. albeit ACW is an overall outlier at being ALMOST A MILLION WORDS. even then, I don't think any of my over fics have ever really gotten past 150k, and I believe only ONE had done so.

this was... not by design.

believe it or not, I intended ACW to actually be short. 6 chapters like the game and boom, done. I thought I could summarize everything and just show snippets of a growing relationship between Arthur and my unintentional OC, Wolf. it almost would've been like a one-shot just broken up into chapters for homage sake.

but then I overplotted the prologue and next thing I knew, ACW had become this massive, sprawling monster of a slow-burn.

as for outlines... I don't necessarily outline. I'll explain this more in my next response. :)

Do you write a summary of a chapter or fic down, then draft afterward?

so in terms of summary, no. these stories live in my head, and I tend to feel that writing things down is more of a waste of time for me.

my brain flies through stories at such quick speeds I feel like I will lose my spark or my ideas if I take a second to write things down.

I am known to do audio recordings where I talk about my writing though. this is an amazing way to brainstorm on the fly, and some of my best ideas have come from just voicing what I'd like to see happen aloud. additionally: the recordings are a good way to keep track of what I've said and want, just like an outline!

otherwise I don't outline. I'm not sure what the terminology is, but I apparently go after my stories a lot like Stephen King does.

write first, worry about the rest later. I'm very much a "swim and swim even if you're sinking" because I would rather put the work in than fool with floaties to keep myself up.

personally this works wonders for me, as I don't like restraining myself or my head once I'm in motion. it doesn't end well if I do-- like snuffing a candle. I just go for it and I will make sense of it later.

even so, I have general ideas for what I want to happen, and I remember my basic outlines. the details come later, as long as the big picture is visible to me.

as for ACW: the only "outlines" I did was timing of the game missions. just to make sure I didn't miss major happenings, and that I had the timing in a way that flowed for what I wanted both logically and narratively.

as for drafts, I also don't draft. again, I go for it. that being said, I have restarted updates a couple of times, or have deleted entire scenes out of dissatisfaction. most of the time though, it's one and done for me! and it's all done on the fly. :)

Are there scenes you add/remove?

as mentioned above, yes. I have deleted a lot of content from ACW. some ideas never came to, but more often than not, it was repackaged in a way I liked better. so if anything, content was recycled and you all still got to see it in some way.

but there are some things that I want to do that just aren't possible. like many stranger missions. there's no good way to include certain events or characters in ACW without derailing what is going on. so alas: aberdeen pig farm is not a stop on Arthur and Wolf's itinerary.

but for another example, I wanted to showcase more of Wolf's past with her father (specifically her shut in life before his death), and I wanted scenes and more examples of her being disconnected unlike everyone else as a result.

these will come as flashbacks or other scenes in the upcoming chapters, but I intend to add these changes or additions during my revisions! :>

Is there usually a length goal you set?

as for word goals, I never quite had any apart from "at least 20k words" just because that was usually my average, I noticed.

additionally, this made sure I didn't end chapters without putting the bare minimum of content in them, and to have solid continuity. can you imagine have a 20k update and then a 3k one? no thanks!

20k just became my running baseline, after that. otherwise, my limit is when AO3 reaches theirs for the character limit (fence why some updates were split into multiple pieces).

with my other stories, I simply write until the story is properly paced or finished: however long it takes!

---------

whew! what a post!

but I hoped that gave you some more insight, anon.

writing is crazy, and I'm always learning something new. more now than ever, since I'm looking into actually getting something original submitted for publication.

if you (or anyone reading this) are inspired to write yourself, don't be discouraged! writing is one of the most intensive forms of creation. it's not easy. it's not instant. it's a lot of passion and time, let alone a utilization of language and grammar fluency!

it's easy to feel overwhelmed or lost, or feel like it's better to not try than struggle to start. but I can assure, writing is such a splendid thing to do. write for enjoyment, or pleasure, or simply because you want to.

as long as your story isn't intended to be hateful, is your own work, and is fun for you to create... what else matters?

if you want some additional inspiration, just know that I started writing fic in 2012/2013 and have gone through so much in my near TEN YEARS of fic writing. I've learned a lot, and I've grown so much!

be proud of yourself no matter where you are at and start from, and pride yourself in your progress or beginnings.

just go for it! you may surprise yourself!

hope you're having a good one, anon. and thanks for the ask! :)

[harryimaginestuff]

Head Runs Wild

Omg I'm so sorry for not posting for like a month I just haven't been feeling motivated but this was requested by an anon ages ago so here you go finally!

The one where the distance causes a strain on your relationship

Word count: 3k

Genre: Angst (I tried) and a sprinkle of fluff

You miss him.

    Mainly because of his absence for almost 3 weeks courtesy of his job calling him to practically every corner of the earth. Distance had never really been an issue in the 4 years that you were with him seeing as you grew beside him as did his career, so distance was something you were used to. If you were being honest those who analysed and scrutinised your relationship believed that it was this same distance that would be your biggest downfall, but that couldn’t have been further from the truth then as the distance really did make the heart grow fonder in your circumstance, causing the both of you to cherish every moment shared.

This time however, the distance had hit you differently.

    You miss him. As you always do but that feeling would always disappear as soon as you saw his face again.

    But he’s here now, and yet you miss him still. Really, how could you miss someone who’s right beside you?

    You should’ve seen this coming, usually when he was in another country it would still feel like he was right there next to you thanks to the constant face times and texts sent back and forth. This time was different though. This time as the weeks went on Harry always had the excuse of being busy, he always had something to do whether it was to see friends or to finish up in the studio. Either way you had never felt more alone.

    When Harry had arrived a week ago everything felt out of place, Harry was a lot jumpier than he usually was and in that moment you convinced yourself that it was just because of the upcoming album release, that all of these weird moments that you had recently shared with him were just his nerved being projected through his behaviour.

    You recalled a moment when Harry first returned, he had given you a quick hug and kiss before hurrying to the bedroom, dragging his suitcase behind him. After quickly discarding your laptop on the dining table you hurried after him. Only to find the bedroom door locked.

    “Why is the door locked Harry?” you had called out, knocking on the door repeatedly.

    There was a moment of silence before his voice shakily called out, “Oh sorry, one second I’m on the toilet.”

    But there was no flush that followed and once he had let you in, the toilet lights were off even though he always accidently leaves them on, a habit you had always had a go at him for.

    “Must’ve gotten used to locking doors after myself since I’ve been staying in hotels for ages.”

    “Mmm yeah probably,” you had hummed kissing his puckered lips softly.

    The next morning you woke up alone, Harry’s side of the bed was cold something that left you distraught seeing as you were excited to wake up to a warm body besides yours since you’ve been waking up alone and cold for weeks.

“Harry?” you had called out as you stepped out of the bedroom.

    “Get back in bed bubs, I’ve got a surprise for you,” he had replied poking his head around the staircase to look at your figure on the top.

    “Well if you insist,” as you retreated back into your bedroom your heart swelled as maybe everything was falling back into place.

    Whilst Harry busied himself with the surprise you decided to busy yourself with his suitcase since he was doing something so nice for you right now you could return the favour.

“What are you doing?” Harry had said as he came back into the room.

    “M’just unpacking your stuff bubs otherwise it’s never going to happen I know exactly what you’re like.”

    “Well don’t.” Harry had said bluntly causing you to turn to look at him in shock before he quickly covered for himself, “We’re gonna have a relaxing day of doing absolutely nothing and just staying in bed, I can unpack myself m’a big boy.”

    You knew Harry well which was expected seeing as you had been dating for four years, and whilst his excuse was valid and sweet you couldn’t ignore the way his voice rose and cracked slightly and the way his fingers fiddled with the bottom of his shirt causing you to second guess his intentions.

    “Now get in bed so I can bring in the surprise.” You smiled lovingly at him, once again deciding to push the minor issue at hand to the back of your mind.

    “Surprise!” You watched as Harry brought a tray full of food into the bedroom placing it in the middle before carefully laying down on his side. “Made you breakfast, and I woke up nice and early to do it too.”

    You beamed at him and quickly pecked his lips, “Aren’t you the absolute sweetest my gorgeous thoughtful boyfriend.”

    The both of you had been sitting in bed for hours basking in one another’s company all issues completely scrapped and left behind as you enjoyed the presence of your love, times like this were rare a consequence of his career choice so the both of you had learnt to treasure it as much as possible.

    “Oh yeah, before I forget H, mums asked me to bring you to a Saturday barbeque this weekend and my aunts.”

    You watched as Harry pulled a face, “M’not sure right now if I’ll be able to make it, you know how busy I’ve been preparing for the album.”

    “Please Harry? She keeps bugging me about you saying that she misses you, and my little cousins do to. You know how much they adore you. Please babes, I’ll love you for more than forever if you do.” You begged, clasping your hands together and pouting, bringing out all the weapons you knew he couldn’t resist.

    Harry looked at you hesitantly before nodding slowly causing you to squeal in excitement, “You’re the best.”

//

    Saturday approached quickly and you couldn’t be more excited seeing as you rarely got to bring your boyfriend to the whole of your extended family, something they constantly had a go at you for since they all fell in love with him almost as fast as you did.

    Whenever he was present everyone seemed to levitate towards him. Unsurprisingly your little cousins who Harry had no qualms in entertaining whilst your aunts and uncles busied themselves with preparing the food. Even your grandma and taken a liking to him which was a shock to everyone since within your family she was famous for being slightly cold-hearted and distant, but as soon as Harry walked through the doors her face always lit up as she nagged at her family to help her walk over to him. The first time this happened you knew for sure he was the one.

    Which is why you were excited for Harry’s arrival at your aunt’s house. The both of you had agreed to just meet there as he had excused himself earlier on in the morning saying that he had errands to run with Nick before going with you.

    However, you wish you had asked him not to and to instead just spend his whole day focused on you and your family. It seemed like this had been the case ever since his arrival, he was always disappearing somewhere with half-assed excuses spewing from his mouth.

    As night time approached the anxiety within you did not lessen and instead increased as Harry was yet to tell you about his whereabouts despite promising to be there by the afternoon. And with no reply to your messages your mood was constantly shifting from anxious to scared.

    Taking matters into your own hands you decided to give Nick a call in hopes that at least he would answer your calls.

“Hello?” he had answered on the first call.

“Hey Nick, it’s y/n. Do you know where Harry is?”

After a long pause he finally answered. “Um, no I don’t sorry.”

“Really? Did you not see him this morning?”

    “No, I haven’t sorry, actually haven’t spoken to him in a couple days said he’s been busy with the album and spending time with you.” His answer only caused the worry instead you to explode as your mind reeled at all the possibilities of your boyfriend’s whereabouts.

    “Okay thanks anyway, please let me know if you hear anything from him.” With a quick reassurance from him you hung up the phone walking back to the sofa to sit with your grandma.

“Where’s my boy?” she had said turning to look at you.

“M’not sure yet, he should be here soon though.”

    “Well he better be, I brought him a batch of biscuits, the one he really likes and if he doesn’t get his little tush here soon I’m afraid I’ll eat them all up.” She had said stuffing a biscuit into her mouth to emphasise her point.

    Suddenly the doorbell rang causing you to turn your head so fast your neck clicked. As you rubbed your neck softly your body filled with relief until it was replaced by complete anger as you watched Harry walk through the door so smoothly as if nothing was wrong.

    “Harry!” your grandma practically screamed in your ear roughly nudging your arm in a not so subtle hint that she needs your aid in walking over to him.

    “Grammie!” he had smiled back carefully bringing her fragile body into his arms before placing a sloppy kiss onto her cheek causing your heart to melt slightly until you remembered his absence during the day.

    “Look what I’ve brought you,” she said presenting him with the box of biscuits.

    “There’s only one in here, did you get hungry?” he teased taking the box regardless.

    “What do you expect after leaving me and your poor girlfriend waiting all day.”

    Finally, he turned his focus to you where you shot him the fakest smile you could muster causing Harry to visibly swallow in distress.

    “You plonk yourself down here Grammie whilst y/n takes me around to say hi to everyone.”

“Okay but don’t be too long!”

    Before Harry could take your hand you quickly began walking down the hallway on your way to the garden.

“I’m sorry bubs.” You heard Harry say, taking two steps just to match your pace.

    “Well at least you know you’ve done something wrong, congratulations there aren’t you super smart.”

“Look I-”

    “Harry not now okay, just say hi to everyone, they’ve been waiting for you.”

    You didn’t wait for his reply and instead gently nudged him in the direction of your waiting family.

    You wished you weren’t so upset about this issue seeing as his presence in this particular gathering held no real importance since it was simply a catch up, however Harry had agreed to come both earlier on in the week and the morning of and since Harry had never been one to break promises this worried you immensely and this time there would be no disregarding of the issue at hand.

//

    Silence filled the car as Harry drove back to your shared home and although you were thankful for some silence since you had taken the train earlier this morning, this kind of silence was horrible.

“Are you going to talk to me?” Harry decided to break the silence.

    “In a minute, I’m just taking a breather.” You said in an attempt to stay calm as to not completely explode in his face.

    After minutes of more silence you finally decided to speak up, “I was so worried Harry, you weren’t answering my texts or calls.”

    “I’m sorry I made you worry, my phone died, and I couldn’t get a hold of a charger.” He tried to reason.

    “Well that’s nice isn’t it. Tough for you though that now I’m not even worried for you, I’m actually pissed off. You lied to me Harry, and that’s something we both agreed to never do to another, the one thing that we have always had between one another is honesty even when we were just friends we were always honest.”

    “Okay well I didn’t mean to turn up late, I just got caught up in a few things,” Harry mumbled fumbling with his top causing you to look at him in complete exasperation.

    “Holy shit! You don’t even know what you lied about, are you seriously so caught up in that mind of yours?” Harry only looked at you his face twisted in confusion, “I can’t even begin to express how angry I am at you right now, you said you were going to see Nick quickly didn’t you? That’s what your excuse was this time, that there were things that you needed to do for your album realise which I get H, I really do. But all of the shit that’s been happening is making me question everything.”

    Harry quickly pulled over onto the side of the rode as soon as those words left your mouth, “What do you mean? Question everything?” Panic was clear in his voice as he turned to face you, eyes wide with fear. “Question me?”

    “That’s not entirely what I meant, not question you as a person but your actions. Harry you’ve been so weird with me recently, you’ve been so distant with me ever since you were in America. Just please talk to me, tell me what’s happening. Are you second-guessing us?”

    “Oh god no. I could never second guess you, you’re my life, I meant it when I first said it to you 4 years ago and I mean it now.”

    Tears finally began to stream down your face as you stared at the man in front of you. “Then what is it Harry? Why are you being so distant and cold and why are you lying to me? Why now after 4 years?”

    None of your questions received an answer causing more tears to spill from your eyes, “Answer me Harry! Why now?”

    Harry face now matched yours with tears running down your face as he mumbled to himself how he didn’t want to do it like this and how this was not how he imagined it.

    “This was not how I planned it but I guess my actions over the past month was the big mistake I made. I completely forgot about how my nervousness and secrecy could affect you and for that I’m sorry.” You watched as Harry reached behind him to grab his bag that rested in the back seat, his hands fiddling with its contents. “Fucks sake I can’t even get on one knee.”

    His words caused you to freeze and for your heart to pummel within his chest because he couldn’t be… there was no way that what he was about to do could be true.

“Harry…” you whispered your voice trailing away.

    You watched as Harry shifted in his seat in attempt to get comfortable until finally deciding to rest on his knees. “Okay so this isn’t how I imagined it at all. But over the past month I have been bending myself over backwards to do this constantly second guessing myself on if I should and then how I should. And I know it doesn’t completely excuse my behaviour but the real reason for my distance when I was in America was because I was looking for a ring and I didn’t want to talk to you too much because I was scared that somehow I’d give it away and somehow mess it up, I can see now that I did end up doing that anyways. And that time with the suitcase the ring was still in my bag because I didn’t expect you to come the bedroom so I panicked, kind or ironic really I was actually planning to do it with the breakfast in bed but then I thought I got you in a mood. And today I was late because I was running around London trying to find a nice restaurant that I could hire out so I could do it then.”

    You looked at Harry in awe, it seemed everything he did completely bit in the arse but the intention behind his actions were good and for that you could no longer hold such a grudge. “Listen H, I don’t care if you proposed to me in a nice fancy restaurant or during a nice relaxing morning. I wouldn’t even care if you did it parked in a car on our way home. All I care about is that when and if you do it, you completely mean it. Because either way there’s no doubt in my mind that I’d be saying yes.”

    “I’m an idiot then isn’t it.” Harry mumbled sheepishly causing you to nod your head laughing, only this man could cause your emotions to go completely haywire and switch so quickly. “So, is it a yes?”

    “I’m sorry I don’t recall you even asking me a question.” You said causing Harry to playfully roll his eyes as you pulled him in for a kiss

    “Will you, the absolute love of my life who has been for years and will be forever, do me the honour of becoming my wife?” he asked smiling and mumbling against your lips.

“Sorry what was that I couldn’t quite hear you.”

     “You’re going to be the death of me woman,” he mumbled before pulling away and screaming, “Will you marry me?”

     “I swear to god if you say no,” he said after your laughter had subsided.

    “Of course, I’ll marry you, I couldn’t think of doing anything better in my life then making you my husband.”

    “Good because if you were going to say no, was planning on leaving you on the side of the road.” He laughed finally driving off.

“Harry!”

    “But for real though, I love you so much and I’m sorry for making you feel the way that you have been feeling. I love you so much.”

“I love you more Harry.”

//

a/n: I’m not gonna lie I'm not happy with this like at all but I really couldn't think of ways I could make it better but I hope you enjoyed this anyway

[jimilter]

the prince’s cinderella syndrome is the best fic ive ever read 😭 it deserves all the love in the world ❤️❤️ if u dont mind me asking, what was your inspiration behind it?

anyways thank you for writing that masterpiece 😭i spent the entire day reading it. thank you so much for your hardwork. im sure it mustve taken so much effort to write out 40k when youre a busy adult. you’re amazing. absolutely amazing. i hope people realise thst doing anything other than not reading it is a sin.

oh my god 🥺🥺🥺 anon, you’re the kindest person in the world, pls! 😭 this so so so sweet, it made me cry. :( ❤ thank you so much for reading my baby! i can’t express how happy it makes me knowing you liked it so much! i am very proud of the fic, and just as you said, i worked really hard on it. all these sweet words omg, brb, gotta sob again!!! 😭 

so, abt the inspiration...hm. there wasn’t anything in specific, just my brain running wild and coming up with characters and scenarios, i guess? in any case, ima tell you the whole story behind the prince’s cinderella syndrome! 🥺

let me begin with why i wrote it:

as you must’ve noticed, it was my submission for naia’s (@/opaljm) jimin birthday event for which we were required to write something with spooky, or supernatural or halloween related themes. now, bec i also planned to make it a fic i released on jimin’s birthday, i wanted to write a good story and not just some halloween party thing, although i did wanna include halloween too bec it was october.

the planning:

my planning began (somewhere in august) w thinking up a scenario where the reader keeps meeting this guy dressed up as a prince in halloween parties every year. this is what i came up with, initially:

Okay so, a cursed-spirit-ish Jimin that reader meets in a Halloween party every year, dressed up as the same character every year, that she can't really recognize, before he disappears the next day like he's got some Cinderella syndrome. And she tries everything she can to look for him but can't find him again until the next Halloween party.

the very first scene of the fic where oc bumps into Jimin is the first thing i wrote (also in august!) and then built the entire backstory around it. why jimin was cursed occurred to me in mid september, bec i initially planned the fic as just snapshots of reader meeting jimin every halloween until she gives up. yoongi’s character didn’t exist for more than a month in my plotline, lol! but then i tweaked things and turned it into a happy ending, and that’s how the entire (almost 10k gawd) portion w yoongi came in!

the writing:

i was done outlining the fic fully by the end of september, after i posted my jk b’day event fic, but i was only, like, 5k words in writing wise and stressing like anything bec i wanted to finish it up in the next 15-20 days but it wasn’t looking up. my estimation of ~20k words was blown when i changed the ending, so i had no idea how much longer this would be. the first draft wound up at 34k words. idfk how tf the other 5k+ words came in??? lmao! 😭

the posting:

i had planned that i would only try to post this on the 13th if i finished it up by the 10th (so that i could proofread in peace). but by 4th of oct, i was only 3/5 done, so i decided to pause this for a while and instead write another, less angsty, and shorter fic for jimin’s b’day, one that i could finish up in a week. but after getting 2-3k words into that, i discussed it with yannie (@/ressjeon) who told me it fit a jk fic she was writing, and she convinced me to pause it for a collab she would hold in future. so i went back to cinderella syndrome. 

i was close to the ending but i wasn’t even done w the second to last scene by the 12th of october. i had no choice but to pull out a teaser to post on jimin’s birthday and then finish the rest of the fic, later maybe more peacefully. i finally got done with the final editing and proofreading a week later, and posted the baby on the 19th of october! 🥺

also, kinda unrelated, i was going through a really rough patch in my personal life at that time. writing this fic was my escape from it, which adds on to why this is so special to me. for the same reason, i feel like there are some bits that i could have done better. some parts can be trimmed, others worded nicer. maybe someday, i will make all those edits! <3

THAT WAS A LONG RANT! PHEW! a kiss for you if you made it to the end 🥺💋

i’m sorry for going off like so, dear anon, but i really can talk abt this fic endlessly bec it is so special to me!

once again, thank you so much for reading it and THANK YOU SO MUCH for sending this so superbly uplifting message to me! <3 loads and loads love to you! 🥺

[firefistlaw]

omg can I please ask for a scenario of law and his female s/o having their first real huge fight? like he may say something hurtful and she’s just like… no longer smiling and usually really silent. no longer sleeping by his side. small stuff changes and it makes a huge difference. could it please have a fluffy ending? thank you very much!

A/N: So, turns out I wrote a hella lot and this is with 3k words my longest scenario… I hope you enjoy this, thank you for requesting!! (fluffy law anon this is for you too! Enjoy my dear!) 🌺

Law & his s/o fight + fluffy ending

It wasn’t the first time you felt uncomfortable on the submarine, but it definitely was the first time you had felt lonely. Negative thoughts kept scratching against the back of your mind, making you feel worse by the second. You couldn’t even go and tell someone about your worries, because the reason of your worries, the person who had broken your very heart was the captain of the submarine. But, of course, he was even worse; he was your boyfriend. Or at least he used to be, you’re weren’t so sure anymore.

You stare at the bowl of soup in front of you, barely registering what was going on around you. It was like a blur, figures kept walking, voices kept echoing but your thoughts? They stayed the same.

Again and again his words were ringing through your head, making fresh tears burn in your vision. You really couldn’t believe it, all this time you thought he was the one who wanted you to be a part of the crew, but after your fight? You sigh.

You remind yourself of a while ago; you sitting on a bench back at home, far far away from the sea when Law had asked you.

“Are you crazy?”, you had said, laughing without any humour in it. “I can’t join you, don’t be ridiculous.” You stood up, ready to leave him and this conversation, go back to home, when a hand on yours stopped you.

“What’s holding you back?”, he had asked. “Tell me. I promise you, I will give you a better reason. ”

“It’s me.” You turned around and stared at the man with dark hair in front of you. His eyes had something in them, something that lulled you deeper into him, no matter how hard you tried not to. “I am not made for the life as a pirate, Law. I will only be a burden for your crew, honestly- it’s a stupid idea.”

“A burden? You?”, he frowned, as if he was the one to be insulted. “You’re already a part of us, Y/N. I saw the way you acted with the others, they already love you. You can’t deny it.”

You gulped. “And you? What about you?”

He let go of your hand. “My feelings for you are…”, he had stared at the ground, but you still caught a glimpse of his eyes, how they seemed to be getting darker. But you might have only imagined that. “I will tell you another time.”

So you had joined his crew, without any experience in fighting, any knowledge of the sea- just a heart throbbing at the sight of your captain. It was careless of you, it was even careless of Law to do something as dumb as that, but he still believed in you. He thought you would be able to handle it, he was sure you could handle the life as a pirate.

You really tried your best the first few weeks, but, well, it was harder than expected. You really had no talent in the kitchen, cutting your fingers way more than the vegetables in front of you. You also had no talent at navigation. You tried it once and Bepo was very willing to help you, but you really just couldn’t. You had no idea what to do and every time the bear tried to teach you, it would become a mess in your head and everything seemed to break.

Night after Night your feet would drag you towards Law’s room, where he listened patiently to your complaints about yourself. Every night he would tell you the same.“Don’t worry too much.” or “You’ll find something, I’m sure.” or, your favorite: “Some things take time, Y/N. I still believe in you.” You would think it would get boring and unbelievable after some time, but it wasn’t like that. Law knew how to make you feel better, he knew how to make you smile again. He wanted to be with you as much as you wanted to be with him. Or at least, he used to.

The sound of your chair scratching against the floor cut through the small dining room. A few heads turned towards you, but nothing else happened. You figured, staring at your food would not make you any more hungry and just sitting would not get you anything. It would only take a seat for someone else, the last thing you wanted.

You walk out the room, when you see Penguin stop in front of you, a concerned look on his face. “Y/N? Are you okay?”

You tried to smile, you really did, but you knew it looked fake. “I’m perfect, no need to worry.” You tried to sound as happy as possible, but you sounded horrible. Hoarse voice, barely loud enough to listen to and just all in all, devastated.

“Are you sure?” You nodded and walked around him, not wanting to stay in this situation any longer. I might have been rude, but you really had no mind for that. You could hear him mumble something behind you, something along the lines of: “Well, alright then. ”

As soon as you left the others, your gaze shifted towards the clock a few metres away from you.

The ticking made you feel nauseous. It was mocking you, you were sure of it. The ticking, the damn ticking, the same sounds you had heard in Law’s room a week ago.

It was before everything went downhill, it was before you found out the truth about how he really felt.

You walk towards your room, and open the familiar door, that lead you to an unfamiliar room. After the fight of you both, you had decided to stay in your own room. The nights, where you shared his bed, shared your secrets and shared your heart were over.

You huffed. He didn’t even check on you after you had left his room, not even a day after, not even two days, hell, not even a week after!

You didn’t see him once this week and even though it hurt, you knew it would hurt more if you saw him.

The mirror caught your reflection as you walked towards your bed. You glanced at it but regretted it as soon as your eyes landed on it. Dark circles were seated under your eyes, which were red and puffy- a sight, that made you laugh humorless. With those dark circles you almost looked like him.

You let yourself fall down on your bed, staring at the ceiling in silence. Minutes pass and soon, your mind wandered back to a week ago.

“So you broke it?”, he had asked you, after you had told him about your disappointing day yet again. It was embarrassing for you to tell him, but now that he asked you another time, it was even worse.

“Well… kind of.”, you mumbled, not meeting his eyes.

You were seated on a chair a feet away from him, fiddling with your fingers nervously. His gaze was on some papers, but you still felt like a child getting scolded by their parents.

“What do you mean with ‘kind of’? Is it broken, yes or no?”, he had asked with an annoyed undertone, making you look up to him. That was unfamiliar.

Normally, he would grin at it, maybe tease you a bit, but he never reacted to you like this. You could feel yourself become hurt, but mostly, you felt angry. You did not WANT the thing to break.

“It’s not working anymore, so yeah, it is broken. ”, you frowned. The both of you were talking about some medicine thing Law had in his room. Earlier you had decided to help one of your crewmates tidy up a bit of Law’s utensils, but of course, you broke one as soon as you touched it.

“Nice job, Y/N. You could have been at least a bit careful. ”, he closed his eyes and shook his head, obviously irritated by your actions. “You don’t even know how important that was.”

You stared at him for a few seconds, speechless. Was he being really serious right now?

“Do you think I wanted that to happen? It was an accident, Law.” You huffed and crossed your arms over your chest. “I’m sorry, but you have a hundred of those things.”

“No, I don’t, Y/N.”, he said angrily. He glanced at you once and let out a long breath.

You grabbed the chair tightly, “What the hell is your problem, Law?”

He turned around in his chair, mustering you for a second and sighed. Nothing else happened, but you felt like that was already enough.

“So I’m your problem? Is that what you’re trying to say?”

“I never said that, Y/N.”

You took a deep breath, you had to calm down. It was kind of your fault after all, right? You broke the thing. Not him.

“Okay, you’re right. I’m sorry.”, so you relaxed again and tried your best to keep calm, but it got even worse.

“What are you going to try now? You tried everything already: kitchen, navigation… you even tried to help me. ”, he whispered and scribbled something into one of his books.

“Don’t know, I might ask one of the crew to help me learn fighting. Might be a smart decision…”, you played with your own fingers again.

He huffed. “As if.”

“Excuse me?”

“As if that will work.”, he stared at you for a quick second. “You can’t fight. It will take ages.” Then, he whispered something to himself, something he probably didn’t want you to hear, but you still managed to get every word, loud and clear:

“You can’t do anything right, anyways.”

You were furious, insulted and hurt. “What the hell, Law!”

You stood up from your chair, not able to hold it back any longer.

“You were the one who wanted me to be a part of your crew! You were the one, who said all this stuff about me fitting into the crew! It was you, Law, do you remember?”, you yelled. You didn’t knew what had come to him, you didn’t knew what was going on and especially, you didn’t knew how to handle the situation. “Law, I don’t know what your problem really is, but either say it now or stop acting like a jerk!”

He turned around in his chair, glaring at you. “Just stop it, Y/N.”

“No, I won’t stop. Tell me, why did you want me to be a part of your crew, if I’m so useless?”

Tears were forming in your eyes, but you wouldn’t let them show. It would make everything worse, you were sure.

“I wanted you to be a part of the crew, because that’s where I thought you belongedd. And I still do, it’s just a bit-.”

“A bit what?”, you yelled again, voice louder than before. You were sure the whole crew could heard the two of you, but you couldn’t care less. “Tell me.”

“Nevermind, Y/N.”

“Are you serious? Nevermind, Y/N?” You sighed and pushed a hand though your hair, still staring at your boyfriend with wet eyes. “Do you regret asking me to join your crew?” This time, your voice was almost silent.

He huffed. “Just stop it now.”

“Answer me.”

He stared at you for a long second, then he turned around and took the book back in his hand.

“So, you do?”

Fresh tears flow down your cheeks at the memory. You still remember how you had felt in that moment. You never knew that sentence, one simple sentence could break your heart into many, many pieces.

You turn around in your bed and stare at the blank wall. Your normally comfortable bed felt like a bed made of ice cold bricks now, but you didn’t care. You didn’t care at all. Soon, everything went quiet. You figured, it must have been late, but you still didn’t move an inch, you don’t think you could, even if you wanted.

You felt stupid. Look at you now, laying somewhere crying, god knows where, under the the sea, without anyone to talk to. You weren’t welcome anymore, you felt it.

Again and again his answer echoed through your mind.

“With this drama right now, you won’t like my answer.”

You grab your blanket and hide underneath it, wishing to be invisible for the rest of your life.

Where would you go? What would you do? And something you had asked yourself everyday after the fight: Will you sneak out as soon as you go on land? Will you go back home? You dry your tears with your blanket, still hiding underneath it.

Suddenly, a knock on your door cuts through the room, startling you. For a second, you get scared, but then you just decided to act like you are asleep. You didn’t want to talk to  anyone, no matter who it was.

Seconds pass, the knocking came another time, but again, you stayed quiet.

Then, you hear the door open slowly and quiet footsteps echo through your room.You freeze, you know who this was. It was just the feeling, it was the feeling of him and you were right, it really was your Captain.

“Y/N?”, he asks quietly. Law stood in the middle of your room and stared at your hiding figure underneath the blanket. “Are you awake?”

Silence.

You don’t even care how you must look like. You would leave him and the crew anyways, so why bother? You tried your best to look like you were asleep, you even tried to breath evenly.

Law walks closer to your figure and for a second, you think he will put the blanket down and expose your tears covered face, but he didn’t. He simply sat down at the end of your bed, careful not to touch you.

“Y/N, listen, ”

You grimace. You were asleep, why didn’t he just leave? You were not interested in talking to him, you sure as hell were not interested in getting your heart broken another time.

“I’m sorry, that I only come now. I should have come earlier, I should have stopped you as soon as you walked out, but I didn’t. I regret my behavior Y/N. I know, nothing can excuse this, but I want you to know; I am sorry.”

You couldn’t believe your ears, after everything he had said last week… he still had the guts to lie at you?

“Everything I said was not true, you can do a lot of things, Y/N, believe me. I don’t know why I said that.”

Unbelievable. You did not believe a word. He probably wasn’t even affected by the fight anyways. He probably still looks the same as always, still hands-. You cursed in your head. You need to stop, you need to get a grip on yourself.

“I take my answer back, I do not regret asking you to join the crew. It was one of the best decisions for all of us. You bring happiness to all of our crew, you make us keep going, you make me keep going, when I don’t want to.”

His voice was weak, as if he had trouble getting them out and honestly, you could feel your heart ache. Was he telling the truth? You didn’t know anymore. You stay hidden underneath the blanket and don’t make a sound.

“Y/N, please forgive me.”

You bite your lip, heart aching even more. He sounded heartbroken, or at least as heartbroken, as Law could get. You knew it was a huge step for him to say those things, he never had his way with words and was the more silent one of you two. Confused, you were confused.

You could hear him sigh. “I know you’re not asleep.”

You froze again. Suddenly, everything felt tense. Slowly, you pulled the blanket down and sat up, staring into the face of the man, that had broken your heart seven days ago. He had, as expected, dark circles and to your very surprise, a faint color of red was swimming in his eyes, something no one else really could notice, but not you. You had stared too many nights into these very eyes, you knew them like the back of your hand.

“You hurt me.”, was the first thing you said, voice trembling. “You really did, Law.”

He nodded and glanced at the blanket. “I know. I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to.”

Ever so slowly, he took your hand into his, squeezing them lightly. His hands were ice cold while yours were warm, it was the complete difference, but for some reason it fit perfectly. This was how it was supposed to be.

“Did you really mean what you just said? With me… making you guys happy?”, you knew you sounded pathetic, needing to hear him say those things another time. But you couldn’t help it, you had to, you just had to.

“I promise you, it’s the truth. You don’t even know how much you affect us, you might not be very good in certain things, like the kitchen… or cleaning…. or-”

“Okay, I got it.”

“I’m sorry. What I’m trying to say is that you don’t need to be good at them, because you being with us is already enough. Being with me, putting up with me is more than enough.” He was out of character, out of the character of Trafalgar Law the pirate but he was your Law, he was your very Law, the moody, silent, nerdy and negative Law. The man you had fallen in love with. “And I…”

He had visible troubles saying the next thing, suddenly scratching the back of his neck in embarrassment. “I… loveyou.”, he mumbled fast.

You smile and squeeze his hand in delight. “And I love you, Law. I’m sorry for fucking up all the time.”

He shakes his head and grabs your head, pushing you towards him in a heartbeat. You find yourself in his chest, inhaling his scent and you can feel your heart gluing back together. He kissed the top of your head not once, not twice, three times. The both of you stay in this position for a while, just enjoying the missed company, when you hear voices muffled through the wall.

“Is everything okay now?” - “I don’t know, they’re not talking anymore!” - “Shhh, be quiet!” - “I don’t want them to fight anymore!!” - “Bepo, stop crying!” - “Thwey cwan’t bweak up!” - “Shhh! Stop it or else- oh, oh my god, where is this blue light coming from?! Bepo this is your fault!!” And then the wailing intensifies.

[bba-sae]

The Painter’s Muse

OMG ANON THANK YOU! I always love getting requests, they’re so fun. I hope you like it anon! Tbh, I never considered writing a Minghao imagine, but I like how it ended up(:

Pairing: Minghao/Reader

Genre: Soulmate!AU

Word Count: 3K

Summary: You’ve sworn you seen the girl in the painting, staring contently at you, you just don’t remember ever posing for the picture centuries before. 

Author’s note: I never really thought of writing a soulmate AU, but I decided that a reincarnation one was the only one that makes sense. I read soulmate AU’s a lot, and I love them, it’s just sometimes things don’t add up. Thats why Minghao’s names are different in his past life times, because I feel like that makes the most sense, also I just FINISHED GOBLIN. Which plays with the same idea and I will forever be obsessed with the grim reaper and sunny. THEY WERE SO DAMN CUTE. Someone hold me, I’m still recovering from the drama. 

You were exploring the numerous corridors of the art museum, the still life that surrounded you brought a sense of serenity and peace of mind. A hand grazed the empty walls, the engraved name plates, the open air in which you would let your fingers trace the outline of each painting from afar. You closed one eye to focus on the pieces, your hand slowly raising, trying to replicate every stroke that fabricated the scenery before you.

Your interest in art always came naturally, an affinity towards paintings manifested in your early years, and you followed it blindly towards an entire education based around the major. It was almost as if you were destined to pursue the world of art. 

The group you had visited the museum with huddled in front of a piece, whispers growing louder as you walked closer. Heads peeked up above the crowd, as if looking out for a certain person. It came to your surprise when the pair of eyes landed on you, another student stepping out of the crowd and raising an arm to point at your figure. 

“You, that’s you.” He proclaimed, his other hand steadily pointing at the painting to the right of him. You tilted your head in confusion, unsure what the exact topic the boy was referring to. He sighed, a groan in frustration really, as he continued, “the girl in this painting, it’s you. It is the spitting image of you.” He said slowly, the group beside him dispersing so you could make your way toward the painting.

You walked closer, the painting still not catching your eyes as you focused more on the student. “The painting? It can’t be, all these paintings are decades, centuries old. There’s no way that it could look that much like me, you guys suck at these things anyways. Just because they have the same skin tone and vaguely similar eyes doesn’t mean they're the same person.” You laughed before continuing, not believing their claims one bit, “That would be im- holy shit thats me.” Your eyes fell on the painting for the first time. Your mouth fell open, as if unable to comprehend the situation at hand. 

There was no way you could look at this painting and not believe the girl in the painting was you. You traced every contour and curve of her face with your eyes, the action feeling brutally familiar to you. In fact, you had done this a thousand times before, whenever you took the time to analyze your own face in the mirror. It was the same, anyway you looked at it. 

“It gets better.” The same student commented, directing your vision to the rest of the walls, adorned with five more paintings, with the same spitting image of you as the subject. “read the name plates.” You nodded, as you walked down the exhibition, reading each and every gold plate beneath the piece. The first four, you discovered, were painted by the same individual, a fact that did not surprise you. It was the last one, a solemn portrait of you, a faint trace of sadness laced within the strokes of paints, in which the artist had surprised you. It was different. A name you had not known but differed from the previous ones before. 

“So what? The second artist must really admire the others work.” You replied with disbelief, shaking your head at the prospect. Another female student spoke up to disagree. 

“That can’t be, I did research, the first painter’s pieces weren’t discovered until the late 20th century and the family who had them kept them locked up before they were found. The last painting was from the later 19th century. There’s no way he would have seen those paintings.” You laughed, because that’s the only thing you could think to do at that point. The coincidence making you nervous. 

“Okay, well people look alike all the time, I must have a doppelgänger from the past.” You tried to argue, only to be shot down once again by the same student.

“No doppelgängers look that similar. None are the exact, spitting image of each other. That just doesn’t happen.” The girl replied, trying to help you understand what was happening. She lifted her phone, a picture of a boy displayed on the screen. “This is the second artist. Apparently, he spent his entire life painting pieces exactly like that one. He said he was the reincarnation of another artist, and he had lost his love. He painted that girl, well, you, even though he had never met her. His peers said they had never seen the girl, he just painted from memories, from his ‘past life’” she put air quotes around the last two words. “Eventually he was locked up because everyone thought he was insane, because he was obsessed with finding you, his soulmate.”

“Woah, woah, woah. Hold on right there. Why do you keep saying me? It’s not like I am that girl. I’m here, in the 21st century, I am not some chick from the past.” You waved your hands in disapproval, feeling a strange surge of anxiety shoot through you. You couldn’t quite put your finger on it, but a piece of suddenly felt as if it was missing. You felt in your chest, burning through your heart. 

“I’m not saying it’s you completely, I’m saying it’s who you used to be.” She said calmly, as if feeling your nervousness between the few feet that separated the two of you. “Just, look at this portrait of the artist. Maybe it will trigger something in you.” She reached her arm out, holding the phone for you to grab. You walked slowly towards your peer, reaching for the phone and holding it to your face, scared of what might happen.

You knew him. 

But you didn’t.

But oh god did it feel like you did.

Suddenly, the pain in your heart felt stronger than ever. You grasped the skin on your chest, trying to relieve some of the pain. You felt empty, unable to hold back the overwhelming sadness that beat on your insides. You were crying. But why were you crying. You had no idea who this person was, yet you felt like you had just lost the most important person in your life. Your breath became heavier and you felt your body go limp. All at once you were on the floor, students flooding to accompany you. One student held up your body while the female student you spoke to before crouched in front of you, grabbing the phone from you.

“Do you believe in reincarnation, y/n? Soulmates? Fate?”  She looked at you, much more concerned for your wellbeing than to hear your answer. You wiped a tear from your face, trying to steady your breathing as much as you could.

“No.” You said weakly, and quite unconvincingly at that.

“Maybe you should start.” Was all she said in reply.

A week passed since you visited the museum, your peers began treating you like glass, as if you were deathly ill. Everyday, a new student turned to you and quietly whispered to you as if their voice alone would make you shatter into a thousand pieces, “Do you remember?”

You always shook your head in reply because you really didn’t remember. But oh god did you desperately want to. You studied the painter’s face every night since that day, researching every fact about his life and the other artist’s life. Though there wasn’t much about either of them, you took in as much as you could. 

The first artist. Lu Chao. Son of wealthy merchant during early Qing Dynasty. Qing Dynasty: a period in which many Ming loyalists lived in self-enforced retirement. Often lacking access to important collections of old masters, loyalist artists drew inspiration from natural beauty.

Second artist. Li Ming. Born: 1864 Died: 1891. Often wrote stories about what he believed to be his past life, when he was a wealthy merchant and wrote many letters to his lost love. Painted and sketched hundreds of portraits of the same woman, unable to identify. Died in mental asylum from malnourishment in 1891.

He was only 27 when he died- you thought often. For some reason, your heart hurt at that fact. The throbbing feeling had you gasping for air, and a heavy weight on your shoulders seemed to have pressed onto you further. You analyzed a picture of Ming every night, almost going mad at the sight. It’s as if the memories would flood your mind at every moment, and you no longer had to pick apart the details of his face. 

“Do you remember?” A familiar voice peeked your interest. It was the girl from the other day, you had learned her name in the days she prodded at you for answers. Hana. A peculiar girl, far more interest in the idea of reincarnation than you were, that is, until now. 

“No, I don’t.” You said curtly, the routine was blasé by now. Hana shook her head, as if you had the choice to remember or not. 

“Maybe you’re not trying hard enough.”

“What does that even mean? We don’t even know if that’s actually me! Everyone is just overreacting about everything.” 

She looked at you as if you were the crazy one and crossed her arms in front of her chest, “Impossible. No one starts sobbing at the sight of someone they have absolutely no association to.”

“It could have been heart burn. I’m getting old after all.” That earned a snort from the girl beside you. 

“You and I both know that’s a lie. You felt something, and you still feel something. I can tell, just try a little harder.” Your gaze shifted from Hana to the ground, your entire being feeling empty once again.

“How do I do that.” You replied meekly, earning a sympathetic look from Hana. After all, you were trying, desperately, completely and boldly trying to remember.

Her hand rested on your shoulder, circling the surface in an act of comfort,“Look at the paintings again.” she suggested. You laughed before looking at her. 

“I do. Every night.” 

“No, the real paintings. They’re doing a whole show about it at another art museum, ‘the phenomenon of another life’ is what they’re calling it. They plan on bringing in Li Ming’s other sketches and Lu Chao’s paintings too. It’s a different museum, and it’s a little farther but it might help y-”

“I’m going. When is it?” Hana smiled at you before squeezing your shoulder lightly.

“This weekend.”

The days leading up to the weekend felt slower than they should have. It was only two days, yet they felt more like centuries. You had took the long commute to the museum off a whim that maybe, just maybe you could sort your whole life out. Whole lives out, to be correct. 

The museum was busy, other spectators and fanatics browsed the gallery, amazed at the coincidence. You walked through the corridors, observing each sketch and reading each plate about the artists. Each placard had facts you knew, you had read them a thousand times before. 

It didn’t take long for someone to mention your uncanny similarity to the girl the whole gallery seemed to be based on. In fact, as soon as you were greeted at the door, an employee had paused mid sentence and pointed a finger at your figure.

“Y-you. You’re, you are the girl in the paintings.” The young employee looked amazed, catching the attention of many bystanders Soon, a whole crowd surrounded you, commenting about your appearance. You let out a laugh and smiled at them.

“I believe I’m just confused as you are. Trust me, I’m only a college student, not from the Qing dynasty or 19th century at all.” 

Though you had explained yourself, you had felt the stares wherever you went feeling more uncomfortable the longer you were there. You tried to shrug off the attention, expecting everyone to want answers as much as you did. 

It was further into the gallery, where you were no longer surrounded by painted canvases or messy sketches of your face. Instead, you were surrounded by letters, hundreds of them. The writing scribbled and frantic looking. Each one beginning in the same way; my love, I’ve missed you. 

You walked further, to one letter that rested neatly in a display case. A letter written by the same artist, days before he had died. He had wrote them until his death, relentlessly chasing after the girl he never met, you.  The writing was large, in bold characters. It began like all the others.

My love, I’ve missed you.

I believe I’ll miss you everyday, and everyday after I die, and everyday in my new lifetime if I am not lucky enough to have you again. The people tell me I’m crazy, but I know I’m not. Whatever life I may be cursed in, I will remember you despite the circumstance. You are my love, you are my life, and I will always run to you in every century I am given. I am sorry I could not find you. Any pain or sorrow you shall feel, please give them to me for I only want you to feel the eternal love and happiness the world showered you with in the past life. This is all I can hope for you.

Until the next,

Ming

It hurt. Everything hurt at once. Your hand laid flat against the glass, fingers beginning to curl at the cruel pain that threatened your sanity. You were sobbing, uncontrollably and all you wanted to do was know why. You left your love, and this fact hurt more than ever. He had waited for you, he had remembered you, and you couldn’t. What kind of monster were you that you would forget the man who remember you through lifetimes. You wanted to scream, you wanted to apologize, you wanted him. 

“Tragic, isn’t it?” A voice spoke behind you, you had hoped this is what he said as you couldn’t clearly hear him over your loud sobs. You hadn’t looked up yet when you replied.

“Completely.” Was all you could muster up. The boy behind you paused before introducing himself.

“I’m Minghao.” He said, as if waiting for a reaction. You shrugged off the name, too sad to even listen. You gave him your name, the sound of it making him smile almost instantly.

Your eyes traced the signature, engraving it into your mind to remember forever. For that was all you could do, remember his past now, as if you never forgot. “He must have been furious, she never found him, she forgot all about him, and now there’s nothing left.”

“Well, not quite,” The voice spoke again from behind you, “Maybe he knew he would find her again. The time he was without her, it was temporary, a test from the universe to force them find each other again after a lifetime apart. Of course, he remembered her through all of his lifetimes, but he couldn’t be angry that she didn’t. Fate is cruel, it’s merciless, but in the end it’s beautiful. He knew this fact, he still knows this fact and he definitely still loves her.” Your breath paused, the voice behind seeming louder in your mind than it should have. 

“Still?” 

“Do you believe in reincarnation?” You stood up straight, hands gliding over the glass as you turned. 

The portrait, the face you had memorized, the one you had forgotten, he was there. He was actually there. The boy saluted at you, a smile on his lip despite the tears that were falling down his cheeks. 

It was then, when you looked into his eyes, everything had blasted through you. A gust of memories, swirling around you and invading your mind completely. You had known him, you had seen him, you had loved him. You remembered a son of a wealthy merchant, one who painted you often, one who had smiled at you brightly in the late years of your life. Then you remembered the lifetime after that, memories of the previous life were carried with you yet the face of the man you had loved didn’t quite stick like yours did to his. But you remember his voice, a sweet melody that kept you company in the lonely days of your life. You remembered how sad you remained during that lifetime, hopelessly trying to find something that was a thousand miles away from you. You had died alone, of old age, no family or children to remember you. 

Both of you were crying now, the scene being observed from guests who recognized each of your faces. They knew. They knew exactly what they were witnessing, two lifetimes of love and a third being manifested right before their eyes.

It didn’t take long before one of you moved, you don’t know who but maybe you both came crashing towards each other at the same time. A pair of arms hastily wrapped around your waist, holding you as close to his body as possible. He separated from you for a split second to look at your face, eventually leaving trails of kisses everywhere he could. It was when he kissed your lips when you finally felt complete.

“My love, I’ve missed you.”