#ON FUCKING ZOOM. SO INSTEAD I HAVE TO DO MY WHOLE CRIT TYPING IN THE CHAT AND SPEND SEVERAL MINUTES ACCIDENTALLY DMING A CLASSMATE

[blueskittlesart]

having a broken laptop is all fun and games until. public embarrassment

[retphienix]

I Have A Lot To Say So I'll Read More This.

The short of it?

I'm glad I played Joker- I played it because I wanted to know how DQM evolved when it reached the DS and I got my answer.

It's mediocre. Not bad exactly, I enjoyed playing it, it adds some REALLY appreciated features to the DQM series and if you were playing it at release it had online play which plays well with the post game content which I haven't touched by the time I wrote this:

-but there are some engine/console specific things that made it a drag and there are some parts of the game that are just weaker than the previous games which is amusing since the previous games were simple GBC titles.

And finally, I don't really recommend playing through Joker 1. Can't speak on the sequels, but Joker 1 was a pretty middling experience for me so I'm the wrong person to get a positive recommendation from.

And since the opportunity presents itself: If you like monster RPGs and haven't tried it- go emulate Dragon Warrior Monsters 2 for the GBC, it's really good and also if you emulate you can fast forward the GBC era grind if that's your taste- really a win all around.

On to my rambling:

I debated on writing, rewriting, rewriting, and better presenting my thoughts on this game and the series as a whole but nah, Joker ain't getting that, I'm ramblin'- lol

I will split it slightly between "The ending" and "The game as a whole" though.

Ending:

1:07 - This is slightly a 'game a a whole' thing but honestly it's funny to me that you unlock a permanent repel in this game by doing the main quest. I entered this dungeon feeling strong enough to beat the game, so I just avoided 90% of encounters entirely.

5:00 - I genuinely got a laugh out of Sparkpug's whole deal in this finale. Not story wise, that's fine, no complaints- I mean that Sparkpug is clearly built to be a monster that can carry an ineffective team. He's clearly meant to be bred a few times and a god tier member of a potentially inexperienced player's team- but I literally never used him after the intro.

So during this scene it's supposed to be like "I'm a demi-god monster, you can't possibly beat me" and I'm thinking "Dude, you're like level 10 and shit tier, you can't win, this is hilarious."

Obviously it's a real boss fight and not 'face the monster you once had' but I was having fun roasting him behind the scenes of this recording.

45:00 - What an entirely unexpected change of pace.

Like, I had it spoiled for me by a screenshot that Dr. Snap becomes a monster or something- but I thought maybe he was always a monster or something, and also I got a bad look at him.

HE TURNS INTO A BODY HORROR BEAST, THAT'S NUTS.

Genuinely a highlight of the game.

52:00 - I fucking laughed what a meaningless exchange where the payoff is saying "He was stupid!", it's honestly just silly and dumb but not necessarily bad just dumb lol

55:00 - Not a great 'you won' victory lap. Like at all. Kinda feels like they should have just made this all a cutscene where I appear back at town and see that Solitaire is the leader now etc etc.

I kinda don't understand why it's a victory lap at all? Because all anyone says is "They picked a weird successor to Snap >:(" or "Snap went to the island? I bet he was stopping the calamity :)"

If you have 2 lines of dialogue prepared, maybe don't make a victory lap???

1:00:00 - What a fucking stupid payoff lol

Like sincerely, Solitaire does NOTHING the entire game! She's meaningless from start to finish! And the 'surprise' is that she's the new commish??? And she got the position because she's a rich spoiled brat??? Like LITERALLY that's why????????

What a stupid fucking ending lol

Now her proposed evolution of the contest is fair enough, I mean it's childish as hell, but to be fair- more contests is a fine idea especially since prior games and this game demonstrated the public's interest in watching monster fights. And the goal being to fight her as the final fight is fucking egotistical and stupid- BUT- it does play into the fact that the player didn't get to fight her the whole game so it's whatever?

1:03:00 - This is both the best and worst lol.

This game has no story, like at all, it's fucking empty front to back, and only explodes with like- 1 event at the very end.

This moment is a montage of memorable moments with your 'best friend' Sparkpug. It's cinematically very nice to be honest! Even includes a moment I don't remember at the arena which probably didn't happen lol.

So visually it's cool- I dig seeing the camera zoom out as we run across the beach, and the flashback moments intersplice over us making our way to the scout memorial- that's very well done.

The content is empty lol

As I said there's no story, these moments are nothing lol

And that's that.

All said the ending was a very nice challenge to face with my team- I had to abuse items like mad but I MADE IT! It was a GOOD fight.

The rest I've already said.

On to the game as a whole:

I have issues with this game, but there's good too. It's really like 4 steps forward 6-7 steps back it's weird, it's really weird.

Positives are neat!

> First and foremost- TRAITS!

Monsters in Dragon Quest Monsters have always had a problem with keeping their identity for long. The way I'd explain it to an outsider to the series is that Monsters DO have special stat variance and intended movesets and all that jazz- but the breeding system completely and entirely destroys that relatively early into the game.

While a monster might normally have really high defense and low other stats while knowing buffing magic- breeding, EVEN UNINTENTIONALLY, will have that same monster come out with 9 billion attack and all ice magic.

Monsters in DQM have a habit of becoming canvases for the breeding effects rather than their own mons- and this is undeniably a downside. It makes the game feel unique, it doesn't 'hurt' it, but when by mid-game monsters are more easily identified as sprites rather than strengths and weaknesses or even types (family) it's a slight downer on the series.

Traits fix this a lot by making every specific monster have unchangeable traits which offer things like "immunity to x type of damage" or "higher crit chance"- it's small, but it gives each monster more identity.

> Second and secondmost- SKILLS!

The older games didn't use trees, it used each individual spell as a potential pass on during breeding.

Each monster could have 8 spells, and when you breed two monsters you pass on all 16 spells to the offspring (they don't learn them all at once, they learn them as they level up) as well as the natural spells the monster would learn by level up.

So in the older games it is really easy to end up with a refined and overpowered list of 8 spells on each of your monsters.

Now spells are tied to Skill trees and your monsters can have 3 skill trees total (which are passed on as OPTIONS when breeding).

All to say skills do a lot for removing the "Master of all, weakness of none" spell lists that the older games made trivial to make, now you have to limit your builds and be more specialized- also they added skills like "Attack up" to add more variance to a build- instead of having spells you might just have high stat buffs as skill trees.

Overall I think Skills are an improvement because coupled with Traits it makes each monster feel much more specialized and unique and less like a sprite with no identity.

> Breeding is improved.

This is very much because of skills and traits- again- but also the system is just improved in general. Instead of being told "That's a monster you haven't had before!" and judging your decisions based on the name of the offspring breed, now you get to see a small sprite of the resulting monster to help you decide- ALSO instead of getting 1 result for every combo (to the point where you have to back out and choose Monster A + Monster B and Monster B + Monster A as separate options), you now get up to 3 results to pick between for every breeding opportunity.

It's just better.

> The engine is impressive.

At least to me. This is a DS title using (from what I read) a rework of the DQ8 PS2 game's engine- it certainly looks like it.

Combat models are nice, using moves looks nice, overworld exploration looks nice- it looks nice.

Now for some negative and general nonsense- all of which is more often than not 'weird'.

> I gotta be unfair and say "The Story" first and foremost.

DQM 1 and 2 are not intense story games. They aren't.

But they both knew how to handle their story well for what they wanted to tell, I can and will praise both for their narratives because they know what they are and do it well.

DQM:J does not. It's fucking bad.

Basically: The overall story doesn't exist- you're told to be a spy, but that comes up 1 time towards the end of the game and LITERALLY doesn't matter at any other moment INCLUDING the one time it comes up.

You have NO meaningful objective from the start up until near the end of the game. You show up and have no goal- so you get told to get some crystals with no meaning behind it (not even a lie because they are clearly evil- not even a lie to motivate you! NO MEANING IS PRESENTED! JUST DO IT! TO DO THE CONTEST I GUESS! WHY? SHUT UP!)

So 90% of the game time you're not doing anything meaningful. So what about the islands? Any small narratives to keep things moving?

NO!

NOT AT ALL!

So you go 90% of the game having no real objective, just kinda wandering forward mindlessly- and then the game suddenly goes "Oh! Guy who seemed sus! He's evil! He's gonna unleash the calamity that you were 'kinda but not directly' working towards with your dog! You know, that plot point that's kept vague and paid 0% attention to the entire game? Yeah it's happening! Aaaaand you're done! GG!"

Basically there's just nothing going on in this game, it's all background noise until the last 10% of the game. And that's lame.

DQM1 had a light story- but from the very intro cutscene you have a clear objective which makes every action you do seem relevant as you are working towards that goal.

From the start of the game you know "My sister is gone! The king says a magic wish can get her back! I'll go do that!" and then you do!

DQM2 has a much better story!

You have a goal from the start (The kingdom is physically dying and you have to save it by getting a new plug!) AND it has stories for each world you visit!

THAT'S MILES BETTER! THIS GAME COULD HAVE DONE THAT FOR THE ISLANDS!

Anywho. Story is lacking and empty and lame especially when DQM2 has a similar format but does every part better- you have a clear objective you're working towards AND side stories to keep the light narrative moving!

WTH!

The spy plotline doesn't matter! It could have been used to build suspicion on who's the good guy!

The islands are so empty of story!

DQM2 has a fun mix on how a rival character works which makes every world interesting to see how they get involved!

This game has a rival that does NOTHING!!!!!!!!!

It's just such a step back from the previous games, it's weird to see DQM 1 land a solid simple story and DQM 2 build a great format to expand the story going forward- and then DQM:J just slams its head into the dirt and wipes out.

> Game's slow.

The engine switch is a good thing overall, but it makes combat slower (a lot), adds loading screens to combat (primarily), and they didn't bother speeding up the grind from previous games.

Because of the grind still existing which isn't a problem in and of itself- the game becomes SLOW AS HELL because the engine makes that grind take longer.

Also world exploration is slow which is to be expected when moving from 2d to 3d, but this is countered by adding things to the world to find or do- and Joker tries but it's still noticeable. The world exploration isn't a problem, it just stands out alongside the combat being slow as hell.

The engine change was a great thing- but it feels like they should have put more work into speeding up combat to counter the slowdown of load times and flashy animations.

A GOOD WAY TO FIX THAT MIGHT BE XP!

> Music ain't great in my opinion.

DQ has amazing music. This game has some weak renditions in my opinion. The CELL HQ theme song is a pretty good poster child for the worst there is, but just in general even the better music is lacking compared to the chiptunes of the GBC or the better mixes of the main series.

Maybe it's unfair, it's a DS game, I don't know, I just know I ended up just muting most of the game because it didn't sound great. I played the GBC games OSTs instead for a large portion of my playthrough. I listened to videos instead for the bulk of the game.

It's just not pleasant to me, sorry to say.

> XP!!!!!!!

I'm being a spoiled ass on this but yeah!

XP SUCKS IN THIS!

There aren't good placed to grind until you beat the game! (apparently)

The first level blatantly has too low xp which makes you grind before you can tackle the boss of the island- and the late game has you mindlessly grinding low xp rewards in order to be ready to face the final boss.

It's WEIRD!

Why is it so low!

> Tech is weird!

I could ramble on this alone but here's the short version:

DQ has a unique fantasy world aesthetic that each game has explored in its own way. It's basically "swords, magic, monsters, and charm- things feel light but aren't afraid to get scary sometimes :)"

This game... doesn't.

This game has fuckin' tech watches, jet skis, TOWER PCS????

This ISN'T dragon quest on a world building level.

It's like, contemporary modern world but with slimes.

And that could be good I guess, but it feels so fucking weird to see PCs right alongside swords and axes and a dracky.

Like... why?

It's a poor aesthetic according to my tastes. Maybe I'm an ass for that. The tech is weird.

All to say, in a poor rambling "I gotta get this out of me" kinda way, is Joker was fine.

I enjoyed breeding. I enjoyed seeing the engine. I enjoyed the unique additions like a 'hero monster'.

But I also had to grind mindlessly on a slower game.

I had to endure a story that forgot to show up until the very end.

I sat there thinking about replaying the older ones the whole time.

It was fine.

It's mediocre.

I'm glad I played it.

I'm done now :)

[earthdeep]

so I actually finished fe echoes shadows of valentia after *checks back through blog* about one and a half years. or rather, I got totally fed up on my first playthrough and restarted a few days ago bc I was sick of having it semi-complete. I have Thoughts so... under the cut

might as well get the technical stuff out the way. 

loved the artstyle. but the ui fucking sucked. all the important numbers and stuff is WAAAAAY too small to make room for character portraits and the layout of a lot of options is just... weird. oh and there’s no way to look at a zoomed out map and it’s a pain in the arse when I just wanna check where the fucking enemies are.

combat system is... definitely interesting for a fire emblem game. I enjoyed it overall, but it felt a bit lopsided. no weapon durability (yay), no weapon triangle (eh), magic users learn spells in character specific orders (hm), 90% of bow using enemies can’t do shit against fliers (wtf?), absurdly high crit rates (ugh)... lance users ended up near useless by endgame. I had a single one who could hit hard enough to take down an act 5 enemy, and he was too slow to chase them. meanwhile I could keep my archers back way out of enemies’ range and crit them, or field my many mages who could do massive damage AND heal each other constantly. srsly, all hail our lady and saviour delthea, who by the final boss had 30 atk and could oneshot almost every enemy with her lowest level spell. she is the best, and I love her very much.

there was a lot of other fidgety stuff especially on the overworld that really got on my nerves after a while. I’ve never been fond of the point hopping system that’s fairly common in tactical rpgs, but echoes has the infuriating variation that forces u to fight every respawning enemy u cross. fuck those graveyards. fuck them to hell. especially fuck them when I have to pass them so often to complete sidequests in the villages and such. but at least dungeon exploring is still fun. well, I say that, and it leads into another bother.

fates, the previous fe game, did a lot to improve the experience of casual players such as myself. the protagonist being allowed to fall in battle without an insta game over, for example. phoenix mode was nice for replays too, tho since echoes was preeeeetty linear that’s a moot point for me. echoes decides no, actually, fuck that, and also fuck the battle saves introduced in awakening. ur gonna work through duma’s tower for an hour with no way to save and reload and if one of the ten million enemies in there knocks down celica ur losing all ur progress without even a chance to use the in-universe save scum device. bc fuck u.

incidentally, duma’s tower is where I quit during my first playthrough.

buuuuuuuut there’s more to games than mechanics. there’s story too! and... hoo boy. there’s two major sticking points for me that ultimately make it a disappointment. spoilers ahead for literally the entire game.

number one: the broken aesop of alm’s arc. ie, fernand was right.

so, fire emblem games have a lot of birth destiny and divine rights to rule and all that jazz. while it can be just a background fact of life (awakening and imo path of radiance fell into this) or a major problem that causes protagonist centred morality out the whazoo (Y HALLO THAR FATES’ CONQUEST ROUTE), echoes tries to go a different route, especially in the first act. alm butts up against those who don’t think he should be allowed to be a knight, let alone lead an army bc he’s of common birth. even those on his side (*cough*clive) struggle to hold noble and common life of equal worth. but here’s alm, the poster child of destiny caring not for trivialities such as parentage. he’s a good fighter and a good leader, and proves that even a commoner can become a hero!

except they can’t. alm isn’t a commoner. he’s a prince. he could never vanquish duma if he hadn’t noble blood in his veins, bc the falchion is locked in a vault only royals can enter, and is a sword only he can wield. were he truly a commoner, he would have failed. and all this would’ve been easily forgotten fridge logic if the characters hadn’t kept bringing the even a commoner bs all the way with them until he found out who his dad was! fernand, the primary voice for this shit, doesn’t die until after seeing alm revealed!

frankly, alm being a lost prince was purely a detriment to the story. oh no, he killed his dad? who fucking cares. blood is the only thing they share. I’ve seen this dude like twice before I cheesed his ass by warping my best units up to his section of wall and zapping him. half his dialogue is only available post-patricide. alm had more of a connection to Asshole Cousin Berkut that to him. also, his plan for preparing for the end of the world as is stood was one of the worst I’ve ever seen.

but there’s also a more fun point. number two: the straight agenda!

ugggggh. listen. on my first round through, I joked a lot abt all the unrequited love going around. and honestly there’s quite a lot of interactions that I found genuinely nice. faye and leon being open about their feelings and accepting they aren’t requited, and alm and valbar being honest and comfortable with that. or delthea mentioning her crush on clive to his sister and having mathilda immediately pointed out. or like, clive and mathilda’s entire relationship during the game. I like me a lovey dovey battle couple.

but then the epilogue slides hit. why the fuck would mathilda become a Good Housewife(TM) after marrying a man who encouraged her as they fought alongside each other. delthea gets the same treatment and settles down with an unnamed husband and becomes “normal” in her slide. then u have mae and boey who get married and have children and argue AND THAT IS IT. like guys, I like me some rivals to lovers as much as the next lesbian, but u can’t be said to have kids that give u more reasons to fight and have me believe this is any way healthy. please find a replacement for celica bc u do NOT work together on ur own. *sigh* at least clair and gray have a nice marriage where they’re both free to be themselves. in my game anyway, idk if she hooks up with tobin if they get higher support, but when he’s an archer and she’s a frontline fighter, they never had a chance.

and then there’s alm and celica.

I could’ve liked alm. I really could. while his base is still Default Fantasy Hero, I like his comments when u examine things, I like that he has the nerve to stand up to clive when he’s on his bullshit. but dude. u met ur fake cousin celica briefly when u were kids, got along well, then obsessed abt her for like a decade. get. over. it.

same to u celica. u were fucked in my eyes from the beginning bc I find devout characters actively dull, but come on. u made a friend who had a birthmark like urs. as far as ur concerned, that’s all. stop reading the script and try learning the politics of running that kingdom ur set to inherit.

beyond the “alm...” “celica...” wistful calls, and the forces of destiny/the writers, I could not tell u what draws these characters together. the one time they’re not staring into the middle distance at each other, they’re in a petty fight that makes celica look like a spoiled child (and keeps her there until after she sells her fucking soul to the shadiest guy in the fucking universe? celica. celica cmon.) like why do these people like each other. with as much as destiny pulled them together rather than human connection, they may as well have been siblings instead.

on my first run, I genuinely thought that was where they were headed. I got given “alm can lift royal sword” and “celica ‘lost’ brother in fire” and put together that OH! they’re brother and sister! like mila and duma! bc it’s history repeating itself! and then conrad showed up and I was confused. also, iirc alm genuinely believed celica was a cousin of his while they were interacting as kids and didn’t learn she was just in Fantasy Witness Protection until later, so for that to turn into poorly telegraphed romance is just... ew.

anyway. at least most of the characters were good. can’t even pick a favourite tbh. I like clair a lot, and tobin and gray. mae and delthea are both fun and adorable. the valbar/leon/kamui trio are great and chill dudes. I even like silque despite being the nun type, bc she just tries so hard and I appreciate that. oh and sonya’s very lovely with genny and DESERVED BETTER THAN BECOMING A LITERAL SOULLESS HUSK IN THE EPILOGUE AS SHE TRIES TO HELP OTHERS, FUCK U ECHOES.

also there are definite immersion hiccups. oh, the land’s barren and we’re facing famine, huh? *stares at trees full of oranges* *stares at wells full of water* *stares at baskets full of fish* *stares at inventory full of meat and vegetables* *stares at knife that can produce food if I kill an enemy with it...*

wait. I turned a lot of enemies into food with that knife. like my inventory for celica’s army filled up with it. was... was I eating people the whole time?! D:

anyway, fe15, 7.5/10 too much swamp