#Prepare for another update

[cruilty-ink]

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Masterpost

He's cooping

[intotheelliwoods]

You know its going to be a fun update when I add extra wet eye details and my handwriting is actually legible

[azaracyy]

to the next stage of our adventure! digimon survive week 2024 day 7: post-game / future personal thoughts under the cut - less about the artwork and more about shuuji and lopmon themselves. a long rambling containing major spoilers and heavy topics. will cause whiplash. proceed with caution.

other than the fact this may be boring and long-winded, cw and tw: there will be mentions of self-harm and suicide. if these topics make you uncomfortable, please step back. if you're sure, then alright. i'm aware this is a weird place to ramble about shuuji and lopmon considering the notorious highlight of their story would match the themes of day 5 (villains) and day 6 (dark & loss) better. unfortunately (ironically?) i never planned to feature them for those days, so... pretty sure i'm not the only one feeling this, but when i discovered that a good part of the fandom seems to loathe shuuji with utmost passion, even after they claimed to have completed the game, i was confused. the way his death happened and (understanding) the cause made me uncomfortable for a while, but never drove me to the point of hate... once i recovered from the initial shock, what i felt towards him was more pity, then respect (on truthful route). i feel shuuji should have been one of the most appreciated characters in survive. yet it was the opposite that happened. (between you and me though, knowing there was this discourse with the fact digimon survive is a visual novel, i'm not that surprised it turned out this way...) from my point of view, lopmon evolving into wendimon then killing shuuji symbolizes suicide, the act of taking one's own life. it was the climax of shuuji's mental breakdown, leading him to basically self-destruct, causing damage to everyone around him and ultimately himself. lopmon evolved, just like he hoped. but failed to do it like other kemonogami partners (maintaining control of themselves and fending off enemies). the next and final outcome was death, through his own partner actually eating him alive too. it reminds me how when someone thought they have prepared well for something important yet it failed spectacularly, the devastation and frustration would eat them in the same way from inside. and they probably would for one second think, "i'm better off dead". the more i pondered about it, the more it hit home, so of course, the last thing i could do is hate him, when his struggles sound similar to my own - having to rely on consistent achievements to prove your value, to feel you are worth living and not a waste of resources. the part where shuuji went all abusive on lopmon felt like the equivalent of pushing yourself to the extreme to reach your goal, to the point of neglecting your own needs. it's like a student so absorbed in their study, sacrificing food and sleep, until their body eventually snaps and shuts down for good (...this in fact happened to one of the students at my previous workplace. she was in her last year of high school. life was just about to truly start for her when her classmate informed us of her sudden death). even in truthful route where shuuji and lopmon survive that point, things aren't immediately nice and easy for him. you can see that he still has self-doubts, and what i think is impostor's syndrome. he could be making a great contribution to the team and still put himself down for having done "nothing". i have found it interesting that artists and writers tend to be especially fond of shuuji. so perhaps it's not just the matter of one's upbringing - whether you were raised in a harsh, competitive environment and/or with family with (unreasonably) high standards so you can relate more easily to him - but also whether one can see just what every struggle shuuji and lopmon went through symbolizes shuuji's mental state. out of all survive characters, i think shuuji and lopmon pulled off this thing called "surviving" the hardest, no joke. which is why i almost always gravitate to drawing them happy because that's what they deserve :') after all this, what i also would like to say is, it's okay if a character makes you uncomfortable. it's okay if you hate a character. but never, ever bring down the character to people who like them or even consider them their favorite or comfort character. if you must, do it in your own space and only with like-minded people.

[doverstar]

elevenrose friends rejoice; I just got four more elevenrose prompts. prepare for a veritable fanfic buffet

[ereborne]

Song of the Day: May 3

"Life Less Frightening" by Rise Against

[lunarrolls]

EVERYONE SHUT UP NEW BH LEVEL UP VID

[candlesoul]

sometimes being offered tenderness feels like the very proof that you've been ruined.

[teaah-art]

I caught up with the Noragami manga and tried coping by redrawing a bunch of Kiun and Takemikazuchi from the manga.

P.S.: It didn't really help

[elendsessor]

tbh every time new news about streaming and cloud gaming stuff comes up i’m given more reasons as to why i try to own games and media physically whenever possible. why sell organs on the black market to get my pc to run a game that can be taken away from me when i can just. buy a copy that i can whip out anytime.

indie games are the only ones i trust taking up space on my pc steam will only be a safe space for so long-

[cerbreus]

today has been a day

[the-kipsabian]

if im off this week, mentally or just not here like at all, im preparing for the first of two funeral weekends

[best-appliance-tournament]

Question before I start doing the appliance polls again (making polls is tedious and a long process and I have my finals this week and I can't even)

[brad-bakshi-loves-bugs]

just opened the google doc for chapter 6 of wafwaf for the first time in like. 3 days whoops

[florida3exclamationpoints]

HIII so I have an interview for a dog treat baker tomorrow?????? I'm so excited and scared and I hope I get it and im so scared

[dilfian]

have things to do. really want to nap.

[asjjohnson]

I just had the thought of making a future fic updating schedule of 'once in a blue moon'. (Partly for the pun.) ...But then I looked up how often blue moons happen, and it's only about once every two years. So... that's probably not a good updating schedule. :(

(I have an existing fic with an update schedule of 'Friday 13ths and Halloween'. I like the semi-randomness. I would like to think of similar schedules. ...Though I'd missed the last two update dates.)