#doverstar writes

[doverstar]

so Lost and Rewritten's first lil sequel is basically done now, and since I don't know if I'll ever post it, here's a peek at one of my favorite scenes (context: he's back)

[artist-issues]

Raya and the Last Dragon popped into my head today and I kept thinking about how the incredibly unsubtle and poorly executed message of trusting others felt like a first draft.

What do you think about it? Would a revised script with the same story premise fix that film? Or was it doomed from the get go in what it was trying to say?

Good question! I go back and forth. I think the movie's biggest weak point was its writing, so I guess I'd say, "a revised script with the same story premise would fix it!"

There's nothing wrong at all with a message like "Without trust, we can't stand together." Because it's very true. Everyone has priorities, and there's always a chance they'll choose themselves over you, or over the "greater good." But if you keep trying to take control of the situation by believing the worst about them before it happens, you'll be exhausted & jaded, they'll be exhausted & jaded, and all your time and energy will be spent on competing with each other for the grand prize of "who can look out for their own interests better."

I think Raya and the Last Dragon's premise works for a truth like that. It makes total sense to have a girl who's competitive become jaded and control-freaky when her father, the symbol of the virtue of trust & good faith, is murdered by betrayal. And not just any betrayal, but betrayal from someone she directly tried to befriend and trust as a sort of "first experience" with that good faith her dad was always talking about. Makes total sense. And it's impactful; something that traumatic and personal would cause a relatable character flaw that the heroine needs drastic measures to overcome.

I actually love the concept of Sisu too. I like the idea that she's this pure, selfless soul who's got childlike faith—but, all the jaded people in a post-apocalyptic world respect and consider her worldview because she's a revered dragon. So she really does change minds just by being around them, just by coming back and existing in the first place. I mean, if she had been just a sheltered girl from, say, a different country, who came into the broken Kumandra with stars in her eyes, the bad guys wouldn't have thought twice about whatever she exemplified. But she's a dragon.

And step back and think about it: having a group of characters from every walk of life come together as a mini-experiment in trust and unity during the course of the adventure is a great idea. It's not flashy or original, but it's classic and true. Avatar the Last Airbender has a crew of characters from each tribe combining to defeat evil. When Kenai has a prejudice against bears in Brother Bear, how is that character flaw solved? Not just by him turning into one, but by him having to travel with and get to know one.

What they get to know is that they all have something in common: they've all lost people to the great evil in the world. And, they all want the same things, despite cultural differences. They all want their families back, they all want safety and success.

So yeah, the pieces are all there. The problem is, the writing was just super clunky. Theres a lot of telling, when it comes to the story, instead of showing. There's not no showing. There's just not enough.

I know this is already a long post, but I'll just point out: Aladdin's message had a lot to do with trust, too. But no character ever said out loud, "you have trust issues and you need to work through them." Certainly not more than once. The closest you get is Genie telling Aladdin to be himself.

Instead, you're just shown that Jasmine is the type of girl to give an apple to a hungry kid without even thinking about whether or not the shopkeeper wouldn't want her to do it. She's the type of girl who plays along with a scrubby boy from the marketplace trying to help her. She's the kind of girl who goes out with a Prince even though she has reason to believe he's already lying to her. She just does those things, and never says, "hey, why did you lie to me--you have trust issues!"

Meanwhile Aladdin's whole story is him bending over backwards to control what everyone thinks of him, because he can't trust them to accept him as he is. But he never says, "Trust gets me hurt." He just says, "if Jasmine knew I was really some crummy street-rat, she'd laugh at me."

Those sentences that the characters say are well-written because they are realistic. Only in our modern psycho-babble Instagram-influencer culture, where everyone thinks they're an expert on the human psyche, are teenagers starting to say things like "My trauma causes me to struggle with trust."

What Aladdin says is much more immediate, much more down-to-earth than that. It shows where his brain is in that moment. He's not thinking about the general philosophy of truth and trust. He's just thinking about what he should or shouldn't say on his date, and how scary the idea of getting laughed at is. We, the audience, are smart enough to infer that it's all rooted in trust issues. We don't need Genie to deliver a speech six times to make it abundantly clear.

I'm capable of identifying that as the problem, but I'm not great at doing it, myself. I know the language, I'm not great at speaking it. But actually I'm going to punt this part of the question over to @doverstar , who is very skilled at "show, don't tell," especially in dialogue. How would you re-write that scene where Sisu is trying to convince Raya of the importance of trust?

One final thing that I think handicaps Raya and the Last Dragon is that, because of the way they're written, the characters lose likability. Theres a way to have a traumatized, defensive girl who thinks she knows everything still be likable. Just like there was a way to have a selfish, insecure liar be likable in Aladdin.

I think there are other issues—I'd have completely written out the baby and the monkeys, and I'd have cut the fight sequences between two teenage girls way shorter because nobody cares about them. But that can be for another post.

[stitchandani]

What role does Victoria play in Zeke’s band?

Doverstar Victoria is the lead vocalist! She's also learning electric guitar from Neal.

[way-too-addicted-to-fandoms]

Thank you @doverstar for the tag!

3 Favorite Colors: Sapphire Blue, Emerald Green, and Ruby Red. I like jewel tones😊 (honorable mention to all my dark academia/Jane Austen aesthetic colors tho🥺)

Relationship Status: Single, waiting on God's timing

3 Favorite Foods: Homemade chicken noodle soup, tacos, pad thai

Top 3 Shows: Doctor Who, Turn: Washington's Spies, Merlin

Top 3 Characters: Elizabeth Bennet, Edmund Pevensie, Aragorn

Song Stuck in My Head: None currently, but I had That Part™️ of El Tango De Roxanne stuck in my head earlier in the week.

Last Movie Watched: Prince Caspian

Last Thing I Googled: Maria Cantwell (junior senator for Washington State, I have a paper to write on her)

Last Song I Listened to: Rise My Soul by Susan LaBarr (I have a choir concert tonight, so I'm listening to all of our songs on repeat)

Dream Trip: Norway. I'm mostly Norwegian so I'd love to see if I can do some research to find any relatives, or just get to know my family history more. I also want to visit Bergen, take a boat tour, climb a glacier, and see puffins!

Currently Watching: Too many shows as always. The new seasons of Mando, Bad Batch, Attack on Titan, and Carnival Row, the live-action Death Note show, Poldark, Julie and the Phantoms, Chicago Med and PD, The Ancient Magus Bride, Peaky Blinders, Tiazu No Tiara, The Hollow Crown, a docuseries on the Holocaust, Fire Country, and I'm rewatching Voltron, GoT, and Supernatural. (I get bored of one show or genre sometimes, and some of these shows are dark or gory so I have to take a break once in a while)

Current Obsession: The Amazing Devil. Their music makes me feel like I'm in a novel. What kind of novel depends on the song, but usually some kind of fantasy one.

No pressure tags: @forever-rogue @waiting4inspiration @estethell @fizzyxcustard @owillofthewisps @luna-xial @ladylibby @juviaismyforeverqueen-blog (you still alive my friend🥺) @drawlfoy @asgardianhobbit98 @clonewarslover55 @bluebellhairpin @megafangirl1734 @musketeersandmuskets

And anyone else who wants to join! Just because you weren't tagged doesn't mean I don't want to get to know you!

[purpleyin]

last line meme

I was tagged to post the last line I’ve written by @sophiainspace. This is a line for an angsty pre-ship fic I’m writing for lockdownfest.

“How long?” Hartley asks, not bothering with formality, certain Barry will understand his concern for Cisco.

Tagging (without obligation as always): @ttinycourageous, @chasingblue57, @doverstar, @agentmarymargaretskitz, @asexual-fandom-queen and anyone else who sees and wants to do it.

[thescribesloft]

Ice Cream Parlor Motivational Writing Game Tag

*TV commercial salesman voice* Are you having trouble motivating yourself to write? Is there a scene that is constantly bugging you? Well, we have a game for you!

We are going to make an ice cream/frozen yogurt sundae from a scene in your WIP. This will help you analyze a scene of your choice and hopefully jolt you out of your disinterested/annoyed/confused/etc phase.

How to play:

What type of bowl you use is the genre of WIP you have:

Round crystal bowl - High Fantasy

Oval banana split bowl - Comedy

Porcelain bowl - Historical Fiction

Plastic bowl - Urban/modern Fantasy

Wooden bowl - Low Fantasy

Metal bowl (Ow! That would be cold!) - Science-Fiction

Paper - Modern Fiction

(Add your own if it isn’t listed here)

The type of scene is the flavor of ice cream:

Comedic - Strawberry

Romantic - Chocolate

Angsty - Vanilla

Swirl/Metropolitan - Mix of the above

(We can add more flavors later)

Plot twists are toppings:

Character additions - Candy (Points if you explain what kind of candy your character is like)

Character deaths - Dark chocolate chips

Character injury - Milk chocolate chips

A tender moment between characters - White chocolate chips

A steamy moment between characters - Nuts (Your choice. Watch for allergies)

A fight between characters - Syrup/caramel/Hot fudge

A happy moment between characters - Fruit

Character break downs - Cookies (Again your choice. Points if you tell what kind of cookie and match it with the reason for your character breaking down)

Character motivational speeches - Sprinkles

How your characters change - Whipped Cream

How you feel about the scene is the utensil you use:

Happy but unmotivated - Spoon

Annoyed - Fork

Confused - Chopsticks

Angry - Hands

Uninterested - No utensil

The priority of the above items is the order they are placed in the bowl

How long the scene is or long you think it is the amount of melted ice cream/yogurt in the bottom of the bowl. It can also represent how long since the last time it was worked on.

You don’t have to write out the whole scene, but you can if you want to.

You can do just key points if it helps.

Be sure to make note of what your dessert scene already has in it and what it looks like/tastes like as a whole before adding anything.

Note what you would like to add and image what those additions would taste like for you and/or reader

If you’d like me to demonstrate with a scene from my own WIP, let me know!

I’ll tag @anaryo @chraneness @procrastinatorkimberlygrey @mvcreates @nkta-ink @doverstar @ps-nippets @donnysaputr4 @farrradays @griffinror @igotablankpage @jeteveux-siempre @thestorychaser @themerrywriter @lemon-i-scream @lmorasey @morosecoffeeslut @pilipalea @paranoidwriter @readershollow @writebruh @write-gallagher 

Feel free to participate even if I didn’t tag you!

[tyrala1]

So i was tagged by @caitlwnsnow, time to write ten facts about me! 1. My biggest obsession in life (aside from musicals ofc) are eating icecubes

2. I can’t stand beans

3. I can fully rap Eminems Rap God

4. I got the highest grade on my English exam, eventhough i’m from Norway

5. I have played the cornet in my schoolband for 9 yrs

6. I basically only read fanfiction, but i lie to my friends and family calling them Internet Books made by Regular People

7. I’m currently in London, and i have been here 20 times

8. My five favorite youtubers are Jessmedley, SophieLouise, Sophdoesnails, AmyLovatt, Tati, and GroffTrash

9. I have a 3month old brother

10. I love to sing every. single. moment. of. my. day

I tag: @jaillankamal @elaine-spades @doverstar @louvreangel @lenirom @tazurose @supermanliveson @mooi2001 @arojax

[doverstar]

waihaihait a minute, it’s the anniversary of Rose, as in the episode, as in the pilot that started it all for me, my whole imagination lit on fire at the discovery of this wonderful story through her eyes in fuzzy old 2005, maybe I have to write a oneshot in honor of this, hand me those headphones-

[doverstar]

maybe tomorrow I'll post that tenrose oneshot that is the fanfic-writing equivalent of two scrambled eggs and the toasted end of a loaf of bread I threw together for breakfast

[doverstar]

#me writing gilmore girls fanfiction

[doverstar]

all I want to write is Eleven/Rose Eleven/Rose Eleven/Rose. Now that I’ve started this decade-old idea tangibly I cannot stop. The world owed us Matt Smith and Billie Piper interacting in DW and not just obscure TV movies or one-off dirty television episodes and I will collect even if I have to do it myself

[doverstar]

but I love writing for the Doctor. love it, doesn't matter which Doctor. he's insane. he's our hero. he's the worst. what a character-

[doverstar]

but what if I did a oneshot from the fobwatched!Doctor's perspective set during LAR though. what if Will got a lil oneshot. as a treat

[doverstar]

just a little update for anyone caring, as of now I am not sure I'll be posting the sequel to Lost and Rewritten even after it's finished <3 I would like to, but to complete the series will take energy and time I may not have anymore. I'm going to write and finish it regardless, even if only for myself

[doverstar]

if I turn an Eleven/Rose oneshot prompt into a multichapter short story, is that...unfair

[doverstar]

elevenrose friends rejoice; I just got four more elevenrose prompts. prepare for a veritable fanfic buffet