#Raz speaks out

[thenecropolix]

Y'all I'm surprised no one has considered this other than the occasional age swap au but

Imagine a far into the future au with an elderly Raz where he's at his Nona's age alongside his friends

He would be the most chaotic peepaw ever

[raz-writes-the-thing]

starting a collection of out of context Dani and Raz

[lulubeanie]

Idea in my brain seems like it might be way too much to be a comic.. I may have to write it into a fanfic instead

[appalachy]

Ok this is a little awkward helped my two friends with their writing part of the proficiency exam and got them higher scores than i did for myself 💀 i still got a C1 in it ofc but less points than them and i wont stand for that

[dabihaul666]

Someone i saw said some t1 shoot i guess unofficial looked the product of alcohol and like what are u smoking so i can have some

[chaospossum]

Are you even s JDM fan bro? Lol

Are you even a nice person, bro?

what is this about lmao? im so confused what is this ahah

[thefandomcassandra]

writing extremely silly theater/literature references into broken bridge >:)

[braxlrose]

i read your tom kaulitz weird and silly headcanons and i can't stop laughing 😭 wtf it's 4 am.. anyway will you do the same headcanons only with bill, pretty please?🤭 i know one hundred percent that this little bastard isn't so innocent what he looks like.. i'm sure he's as dirty as Tom 😭 btw sorry engilsh is not my first language ☠️ Greetings from Poland!!:)

(his skirt is so cute?!?)

Cześć jeszcze raz! Rzadko spotykam Polaków, więc cieszy mnie możliwość ćwiczenia języka polskiego!

also his skirt is super cute omg

silly and weird bill headcanons

cw: mentioned oral(f and m!recieving), making out, nipple play?, etc

-you are completely right, this mf is far from innocent 💀 tom is seen as the dirty minded one but this little shit would make the most dirty fucking jokes every and then act all innocent LIKE BITCH

-he's also passive aggressive. like very passive aggressive. pookie can't help it 😪

-the first time you, him and tom all got high together he got super paranoid and thought that you guys were all just figments of a dog's imagination

-when you guys are spooning, he reaches underneath your shirt and cups your boobs. it helps him fall asleep quicker apparently

-but sometimes when he's feeling like a little shit, he'll tweak and pull at your nipples and you have to slap him away. so then you make him promise not to do it again. spoiler alert. he does it again 😐

-hes an impatient mf so the amount he's burned his tongue after heating up a pop tart 😒 like bitch..just wait the two fucking minutes

-he loves kissing your temple and your forehead

-during the winter, if his hands are cold he asks if he can put his hand in your pants. 💀 like that's his exact words. "Can I put my hand down your pants?" he says it's because you're warmer down there than he is, but I think it's just cuz he's a dirty minded little fuck

-when cooking marshmallows over the fire, it's a 50/50 thing. Sometimes he's super patient and will wait and make his marshmallows a crispy, perfect golden brown color and other times he gets to lazy and will just shove it in the fire.

-he also thinks it's like the coolest thing in the entire world when his whole marshmallow is on fire

-he didn't know how to snap until he was like 16 and always got mad whenever tom could do it 😭

-he was super happy when he realized that he was the taller twin bc tom was allllwayyss talking about how he was 10 minutes older.

-YOU GUYS GOT MATCHING TATTOOS

-he literally loves getting matching tattoos with you, he thinks it's so cute and fucking loves it. somehow he convinced the both of you to get some dumb ones 💀

-when you two were little kids he used to beg the teacher to make you, him and tom partners. lil bro would get down on his knees

-speaking of getting down on his knees, the first time he went down on you he "accidentally" 🤨 bit your clit. I still say he did it on purpose though

-you guys know that thing that Gomez does with Morticia when she reaches her arms to the side and he kisses from her finger tips to the other finger tips? yall know what I'm talking about? WELL BILL DOES THAT

-he likes to sleep naked sometimes. because it's "better for sleeping" but I think it's just because he wants to sleep next to naked you.

-almost drowned tom at the pool 💀...multiple times

-him and tom make you sit by the pool and then make you tell them who's cannon ball was better. and this isn't just a like 16 yr old boy thing. they do this at 33 too.

-bill once stood up upside-down on a keg and drank it 😧. not the whole thing but it was super crazy. you later found out it was because tom didn't think he would do it

-he once jerked off in class and found a way so nobody would notice him EXCEPT YOU 😨 MF YOU WERE TRAUMATIZED

-he also doesn't know how to lock a door. so you'll just walk in and he'll be jerking off, or you'll turn a corner in his house and he'll be jerking off, you go to use the bathroom and he'll be jerking off. "I'm a teenage boy it's what we do!" BRUH GET A HOBBY

-if you don't know german, he'll randomly say dirty stuff to you in german. BUT THEN PROCEED TO GET MAD AT TOM IF HE TEACHES YOU BAD WORDS IN GERMAN 🙄

-he loves sitting in your lap when making out. like obviously he loves it when you sit in his lap, but he LOVES when he gets to sit on top of you and kiss you

-the first time he tried to give you hickies, he wasn't completely sure how to and ended up biting you 💀

-he's not a morning person, we all know this. so if you want to get him out of bed, you will have to drag him out by his feet.

-his dick is big. we all know this, but the first time you tried to give him oral, he accidentally slapped your face w/ his dick 😭

ANYWAYYSSS TY SM FOR THE REQUEST POOKIE I HOPE MY POLNISCH WASNT TOO BAD

taglist: @hearts4kaulitz @burntb4bydoll @spelaelamela @bored0writer @fishinaband @billsleftnutt @dead-tapes @tokiiohot @bluepoptartwithsprinkles

[wileys-russo]

alanna kennedy req, she has BIG bf energy ! where AK has been way too fuckboy-esque around their friends and reader (who she is in a known situationship with/will they or won’t they ever label it) calls her out on it, and probs forgives in the end whatever she says (letting hot girls gaslight you support club ?)

dirty little secret II a.kennedy x reader

mhmm lans is mad underrated dirty little secret II a.kennedy x reader

"-then there's the girl from the bar, the coffee shop barista, the dance instructor, the physio-" you rolled your eyes and did your best to tune out the blondes insistent bragging of all of her current escapades.

escapades you knew she'd made up, lying her ass off in order to try and impress your team mates and friends in camp, everyone now back on national duties.

she was forever determined to keep up the big tough fuckgirl act which you could never understand, much preferring who she actually was behind all that, not that she gave many people a chance to see it.

"why do you let her speak like that?" you glanced up from your food as hayley sat beside you with a raised eyebrow, subtly nodding her head to the table behind you where alanna was still ranting and raving to the group about how hard it was to have so many flings on the go.

"she can do whatever she wants raz she's not my girlfriend." you shrugged, picking at your food and glaring at ellie who snuck a piece of bacon off your plate. "el!" you scoffed as she repeated the action, protectively covering your plate with your arms.

"oh sorry thought you were perfectly happy to roll over and let people take whatever they want from you?" the younger girl challenged sending you into a silence. "nice." hayley nodded her approval, high fiving the blonde as you sighed.

"she doesn't take whatever she wants from me. you make it sound like i don't have a backbone!" you defended yourself with a scowl, the silence from your two friends all it took to further wound your already fragile pride.

"okay, ouch." you mumbled, going back to picking at your food. "babe we know you have a backbone. thats why its so frustrating to see you don't use it or stand up to her for the way she carries on!" ellie tried again, a little gentler this time as tegan and charlie joined the three of you.

"what are we talking about so quietly?" tegan whispered mockingly, instantly picking up the strange vibe about the table. "how dopey here lets lani treat her like a dirty little secret." hayley shrugged bluntly as you turned and punched her, hard.

"what the fuck ow!" the brunette gasped, hitting you back with a scowl as a few of the other girls turned to glance at the commotion, your body whipping back around as you heard alanna pause, her curious gaze fixated on the back of your head for a moment before she resumed.

"would you like to say that any fucking louder raz?" you warned quietly with a glare, answering the onslaught of questions from your friends before you grew tired of it, shutting the conversation down as you all finished and headed toward the gym for strength training.

~

"she's looking, again." ellie smirked as she spotted for you, watching as to her count for now the eighth time in the hour alanna was caught watching you.

"its not illegal to look el, all humans have eyes." you sighed, growing tired of her constant pointing it out. "yeah but not just everyone looks at you like they wanna tear all your clothes off and-" your grip on the bar slipped at that and you choked as it half landed on your neck, the blonde hurrying to grab it off you and helping you rack it back up.

"ellie!" you hissed, smacking her leg with a glare. "what? it's true! plus its not like its hidden knowledge that the two of you have hooked up. actually most of us expected you both to come to camp all cute and coupled up." the younger girl shrugged carelessly as you rolled your eyes.

"would you please shut up? i'm tired of the topic all together!" you snapped, only able to push down how the situation really made you feel for so long when everyone else was always poking and picking at it.

"sorry darls." the blonde winced apologetically not having realized it would affect you so much, swallowing the speech she wanted to give you about how you deserved to be treated better because if anyone knew that already it was you.

"i need to go to the bathroom. wait till i'm back before you even try to lift that!" you sternly warned the defender who you knew all too well, ellie waving you off with a huff as you made your way toward the toilets just outside the gym.

you heard the footsteps follow you out, but knowing all too well who they belonged to you refused to give her the satisfaction of turning around, ducking right into a cubicle to do what you needed.

you'd hope she'd take the hint and leave but you looked at her with a sigh as you stepped out and she was still waiting, leaning against the sinks with a toothy grin.

"ignoring me today are we?" she challenged, having texted you several times throughout the day, all of which you'd left on read.

"surprised you even noticed. your phone must just be blowing up with texts from the...what was it?" you paused after washing your hands, stroking your chin thoughtfully.

"oh yes with the girl from the bar, the coffee shop barista, the dance instructor, the physio? i'm sure one of them will happily text you back lani!" you smiled sarcastically, drying your hands and attempting to leave but a hand wrapped around your wrist.

"come on babe you know that's all just bullshit for the girls." the blonde laughed, seemingly unbothered at how that was almost worse. "well most of it. that cute new city physio does have a little crush on me!" alanna grinned wolfishly, tugging you to stand in front of her.

"congratulations. clearly she's not had a conversation with you yet or else she might come to her senses and realised what a piece of work you are!" you huffed, yanking your hand back from her grip.

"piece of art i think you mean babe, sculpted by the gods themselves." the blonde smirked as you grimaced, not finding her at all charming today.

"just please leave me alone lani. seriously i'm so over all of this hot and cold shit with you, you're a head fuck! you snapped, again trying to leave but once more she stopped you, instead now moving to block the door with her body.

"what do you mean hot and cold shit?" the taller girl frowned making you let out a bitter bark of laughter. "you can't be serious?" you scoffed at her in disbelief as she stared on silently, clearly awaiting an explanation.

"lani when its just the two of us you're so sweet. we go out together, we spend nights together, you shower me with gifts and compliments and i have your undivided attention. you treat me like you would if i was your girlfriend." you paused, the last word leaving a particularly bitter taste on your tongue.

"but then outside of that little bubble around any of our team mates and friends you act like some sort of horny teenage boy! bragging about all of these girls who practically fall to the floor with how badly they want you, and then you go on and on about all this great mind blowing sex you have with them. but then how they mean nothing and they know that but they just keep running back to you!" you pouted mockingly.

"all of those girls which are made up! why is it so hard for you to let that stupid egotistical reputation go and just admit you're having sex with me! and that you clearly have feelings for me. everyone saw us hook up in the bar after the asian cup anyway?" you crossed your arms firmly with a raised eyebrow.

"and who said i have feelings for you then hm? what makes you think you're so special?" she bit back taking you off guard a little, your face falling as hurt flashed across it momentarily.

"you think you know me so well but you haven't got a clue about what i feel or why i do anything. end of conversation!" she snapped with a scowl. "fine. end of whatever the fuck this is then!" you bit back, finally using your back bone as her eyes widened in shock.

however the chance for either of you to speak again stopped as the door swung open and smacked alanna in the back, a tiny body sprinting on through.

"harley don't run-" tameka stopped seeing the two of you, sensing she may have just interrupted something as she scooped her daughter up who reached out for you.

"everything alright?" the older woman asked, directing the question more so toward you, having known you long enough to see something was off.

"just fine." you mumbled, taking the opportunity to dart out of the bathroom, shooting harley a smile and squeezing her hand, only letting out a deep breath you'd not realised you'd been holding in until you were back in the safety of the gym.

clearly you needed to work on your poker face as ellie also immediately noticed something was up, having had a teasing remark laying in wait on her tongue having seen alanna follow after you toward the toilet.

"hey. what happened?" the blonde asked quietly with a frown as you shook your head, gesturing for her to lay down so you could spot her on the bench press. "darls what-"

"later el." you cut her off with a thin lipped smile as she hesitated but eventually nodded, settling on the bench as you busied yourself assisting her, pretending like you couldn't feel another blondes eyes bore into your back for the rest of the session.

everyone having a few hours break now until your next training session outside on the pitch you surrounded yourself with a wall of your team mates at all times, knowing so long as you did alanna would leave you be.

your bad mood lifted as you spent time with harper and harley, adoring the fact that camps were now a family affair as you, kyra and ellie chased the two small girls around the hotel playing a game of tip.

"well i think someone will sleep very well this afternoon, thank you kindly ladies!" tameka laughed as she scooped up harley, marching her off for a nap as harper had already fallen asleep on a beanbag, squished between kyra and charlie as they played mario kart.

"right. out with it then, what happened in the toilet?" ellie pulled you aside and away from the main group, hayley quick to follow having also picked up that you were out of sorts. the three of you sat outside on a picnic table in the sun, your body laid atop of it sunbaking as they sat on the benches either side of you.

with a sigh you relayed the conversation that occured, both your friends not hesitating to rip into their fellow team mate for her harsh words. "you have to cut it off after that. if she wants to remain friends and keep the peace the least she can do is apologise and acknowledge her actions!" ellie scoffed as you merely hummed.

"you are going to cut it off after that, right?" you whined as hayley pinched your thigh when you didn't answer her. "i don't know! probably?" you groaned, covering your face with your hands.

"probably!" "she's really convincing sometimes." "oh my god have some self respect!" "i have self respect! i also just have...needs." "dude! the letting hot girls gaslight you club is not one you need to be a member of." "but she is hot." "so are you! you could find someone else hot who actually treats you like a person."

"fine! i'm just gonna ignore her. if i don't let her grovel then i can't forgive her." you decided, both your friends exchanging looks of disbelief you missed, the conversation quickly changing as you instead spent the rest of your final hour catching up, all three of you now playing for different clubs since hayley had left city.

you stuck to your word, mostly.

you avoided alanna like the plague for nearly the entire second training session, someone upstairs clearly smiling down on you in good fate as the two of you weren't partnered up for anything.

until it was time for a few six on six friendlies to cool down and of course her team was your first opposition, the two of you now unable to avoid one another given you were offense and she was defense.

now you knew football could be a hands on sport, you'd played it long enough to have given and gotten enough. but the way alanna's hands seemed to settle on your hips or your torso, and the way she pressed her body into you each and every time she marked you up, was overkill.

but to your surprise it seemed to have the opposite effect as normal, and rather than having you blushing or swooning a little, you found it only wound you up further. her harsh words ringing in your ears from before as you lined up for a corner and once again she pressed into you, your jaw clenched and you went right up for the header, your elbow unfortunately making contact with her stomach as the ball spun into the back of the net and she hit the ground.

the whistle blew for the end of the session at that and you turned, seeing thankfully no blood and no real lasting injury beyond her being winded. "what the fuck was that!" the blonde spat, a few of the girls helping her up.

"its a contact sport and you were clinging onto me like wrapping paper, sorry!" you shrugged, not really sorry at all as ellie hid a smile and draped her arm over your shoulders, the two of you heading back in toward the training centre.

"a little harsh maybe, but nice." ellie mumbled, holding out her hand as you smacked yours into it with a small smile, the two of you heading up to your rooms to shower and change, having a couple of hours to yourselves before dinner.

dinner itself was less painful than breakfast, busying yourself once again playing with harper and harley you were far too distracted to notice if alanna was off on one of her 'look at all these girls who want me' tangents.

she'd messaged you again a few times since the toilet, none of them an apology and none of them you gave a second thought to reply to, still having left her on read as you had been all day.

which is why it really wasn't much of a surprise when a few hours later came the barrage of texts almost begging you to come to her room and hear her out, the way your phone was constantly lighting up not lost on you or your friends.

"oh my god she's relentless. just go!" ellie groaned after you glanced to your phone screen for the fifth time just a few minutes into the mario kart tournament you had agreed to. "remember, hold firm. you deserve to be treated right!" hayley warned quietly from beside you as you nodded.

"and, self respect!" ellie warned less quietly making your eyes roll as you headed out of the rec room and back up towards the elevator, punching in the right floor and taking your time making your way to your final destination.

you hadn't even knocked more than twice before the door swung open, alanna sighing a little in relief seeing it was you, her texts still unanswered she'd begun to give up hope. "make this quick, its my turn next on the switch." you mumbled, moving past her and into her room.

"well?" you raised your eyebrows as she awkwardly stood in front of you, kit out in a grey drew hoodie and a black pair of nike shorts. "i'm sorry." she started simply. "for?" you pushed.

"what i said earlier. i didn't mean it i was just angry and i lashed out and that wasn't fair on you." she continued, rubbing her face and taking a seat beside you on the bed, not missing the way you shuffled across leaving a healthy distance between you two.

"angry about being called out on the shitty way you treat me or your shitty dismissive attitude about whatever this is?" you pushed again, face still bent into a frown as the blonde sighed. "both. you weren't wrong i do act one way when its just us and one way when its around the girls but i don't mean to! i just, i've not had a serious relationship in ages and i don't know how to go about it." she sighed making you scoff.

"thats bullshit lani and you and i both know it. you just get much more satisfaction having everyone think you're so popular and desired after and lusted over rather than admitting you like me, just one person!" you called her out again, this time causing her to scoff.

"thats bullshit!" she denied with a shake of her head. "awesome. have fun with all your imaginary girls then lani!" you smiled bitterly, standing to leave as she shot out to grab you before you could. "i'm sorry! i'm sorry okay." she groaned, pulling you back down to sit on the bed.

"i just don't get why this is so hard for you! most of the city girls are all happily in relationships and even if you want to deny it most of them know we hook up too. al asked me the other day if we were dating and do you know how humiliating it is to basically admit i let you use me!" you shook your head and pulled your hands from her grip.

"i don't use you!" she was quick to argue, frown knitted into her eyebrows. "yes you do. its exactly like i said lani when its just the two of us you're happy to treat me like you would a girlfriend, we sleep together, we're always at one anothers houses, you take me out for dinner and you fall asleep on my lounge after watching movies all day-" you paused to collect yourself.

"-which clearly satisfies you in some way. but then you're too much of a pig headed coward to actually make it into anything more than a dirty little secret and that feels like shit! i'd understand a little more wanting to keep things between us if you weren't out or you didn't want the girls to know you were seeing a team mate but thats so far from the truth and it hurts alanna. you have no issues parading about all these fake girls and how happy you are to fuck them over but you can't admit that you treat me just the same way!" you spat honestly, unloading months of guilt and wondering and overthinking about everything.

"so what, do you want me to ask you to be my girlfriend then?" the blonde questioned cluelessly as you threw your head back with a loud frustrated groan.

"no lani! i want you to want me to be your girlfriend, and not feel the need to keep up this stupid reputation that girls don't mean anything to you beyond sleeping around and you're incapable of feeling anything for anyone. because you know the longer this will they, won't they bullshit continues the more i wonder if you actually are capable of feeling anything for anyone other than yourself!" you snapped with a huff, again getting up to leave.

"get off!" you warned seriously as she hugged you tightly from behind again preventing you from leaving. "i like you. i do, really." she mumbled with a sigh, your eyes rolling. "sure have a funny way of showing it!"

"then let me show you, give me another chance. when we get back to manchester i will take you out on a proper date, i'll wine you and dine you and i'll ask you to be my girlfriend. properly!" she spun you around, staring down at you pleadingly and you hated how much she really had you wrapped around her little finger.

"fine." you gave in with a sigh, hating yourself just a little more as the taller girl exhaled with relief, pulling you into a tight hug as you couldn't help but wrap your own arms around her torso, relishing in the small act of intimacy.

"where's mac anyway?" you mumbled into her chest, pulling away and recognizing the familiar look in her eyes. "cait's room, they'll be awhile." the blonde grinned and within seconds you were laid down on the bed and she hovered over you, lips gently sucking on your neck as your eyes fluttered closed.

"lani we should really-" you started, words swallowed by her mouth finding yours, one hand creeping up your top as the other gripped your chin allowing her full control over the kiss. "later babe, just relax." she mumbled into your ear as you sighed, giving into her advances and trying to ignore the warnings from your friends lingering in the back of your mind.

it would appear that you were still very much so a member of the letting hot girls gaslight you club, in fact it seemed you'd purchased a season ticket.

[citricacidprince]

Thinking about how fun of a concept the Mystery Kids AU is however I couldn’t never really get into it because, as much as I LOVE Psychonauts and Invader Zim, I never felt like they fit with everyone else

Like, Psychonauts and Invander Zim work really well together because their worlds are strange and fantastical to a fault, but everyone else? Coraline, Paranorman, Gravity Falls, or Over the Garden Wall are very much movies/shows about being weird and strange in a very normal world, experiencing things that you can’t tell normal people because they won’t believe you, so of course they’d mesh well together.

It doesn’t help that I think a lotta fans also didn’t know/like the inclusion of Psychonauts or Invader Zim because almost every time I saw them included in the crossover they were either a) very out of character (like you can tell the person drawing them hasn’t consumed the media they’re from) or b) extremely out of place or barely even there.

Again, I love Psychonauts and Invader Zim, well I know less of Invader Zim but I’m literally the Psychonauts liker. I just don’t think Raz and Dib fit really well into The Mystery Kids AU. They’re just too outta place.

You know who WOULD fit into the AU? The fucking kids from Monster House. They are PEAK “Insane thing just happened to me and we can NEVER speak of this to anyone else because they won’t believe us.” Or if you wanna get a little silly with it, even Danny Phantom fits better than Psychonauts!

Excuse my rambling, this has been in my brain for the past 2-3 years and I feel like I can finally talk about it lol

[raz-b-rose]

Call to Prayer!

My city is holding a meeting on Tuesday at 3pm to discuss making our city a sanctuary city for abortion, ignoring my states current 15 week ban law and decimalizing the actions of anyone who helps in providing an abortion past that limit. 

The churches in my city have all come together to send emails to the council members as well as attend this meeting Tuesday (they tried to keep it quiet so we could no go in support of our most vulnerable as well as our women) to fight against this taking place. 

Prayers for these council members, that the Lord will move their hearts for life. Prayers for the ones pushing for this, that they will see the truth and that the Lord will move their hearts towards life. We are a collage town, so prayers for these young women being lied to about what abortion is, and that any who have already have one will find healing and love. Prayer that no matter what God’s will be done. Prayer for these women and children. Prayers for those who will be attending Tuesday, for love and a warriors spirit to consume them and for their safety. 

(and prayers for our pregnancy centers safety. We only have the one, and these women need the resources) 

[thenecropolix]

Someone correct me if I'm wrong

But if the psychonauts games are meant to loosely take place in the 80s

I just know if the interns introduce Raz to other genres of music, he'd be a fan of Queen and ACDC (I need you to picture this kid belting out Bohemian Rhapsody)

Imagine the little guy's awe at getting to hear the trendiest songs of that time and then going around the motherlobe asking for music recommendations from agents

Can you imagine everyone lighting up when he asks then what they like to listen to and then asking if they could play their music; could be a form of bonding for him between the interns and the other agents (Morris could get him a walkman as a bday gift when they get closer)

[raz-writes-the-thing]

🐉 Anon if you’re out there rn

Im about to watch episode four of season two of succession

[lulubeanie]

Psychonauts art book...

[nolan-chance-fortnite]

HOTTEST GUYS ON THE ISLAND - TIER LIST

I think everyone is here! Forgive me if I missed someone!! If I did... Probably you're not handsome enough (?) or you are!

TIER 1: NOLAN CHANCE TIER

Nolan Chance: The one and only! Ladies, please, contain your orga$ms, I'm here and I have something for everyone!! OH BOY! OH YEAH BABY I'M COMING (To change your life, lady!)

TIER 2: DILFS (if i were a girl)

White haired guy: Just because reminds me of me in my tactical suit. Otherwise he'd be after BL.

Montague: God he's HOT. I want him to speak french to me while he stuffs me little ol' pockets with diamonds!

King Midas/Midas: A tie. A respectful tie. You guys are good looking, I admire you King Midas, Regular Midas (but not as regular as us human beings)

Dirty Jones: Stinky, I wish i had your stubble... between my le—

Lorenzo: Very handsome young boy! Man, you and I are someone's twink dream team

TIER 3: Handsome guys please dont break my bones

Doctor: I think I'd like to hug him, I think he could fix me

Persephone: Persephone (love your eyes)

Drift: Man, give me your arms routine! You're ripped!

Captain Jones: DAMN BOY LOOK AT THAT ASS

Wrecker: Move your butt and wreck this d—

Ezio: Man, show your face a bit more! Love your beard

Rust: He's gonna hit me if i put him lower

Raz: My man needs therapy but keep doing what you're doing with that hair!

Raptor: Just he right amount of face shown!

Lord Hades: Lord Hades I love you and I adore you and I respect you but... you scare me a LOT

Chuggus: Healty! I'm not into you, but I'd like you to be into ME (as shield potion of course)

BL: Yeah boy I sure love BL!

TIER 4: Ehhhh confusing

Oscar: Scary cat, fancy pet. I wish I could take him pictures with outfits to upload it to my social network accounts

Motorcycle guy: Scary guy

Cerberus: Scary underworld dog

????: What is that thing?

Pink Guy: Your balloon face creeps me out a bit but keep spreading love! This island is missing SO MUCH LOVE!

Banana beard man: ?????? But I think Banana beard man is a Banana beard They. if so, sorry for that, they fellow!

Wasteland Dummy: I liked you better when you were regular dummy

Pea bois: The third one looks like he wants to kiss me. Sorry boys, you need two more bodies to qualify as hot. Keep up the good work with cars tho!

TIER 5: I wanna puke

Bucket man: Old man, ew

Robot: Cold, I don'tlike cold

Fire skull: Way too hot to handle

Skull Trooper: Fucj that guy, score a goal and we'll see if you get higher

Paxton Price: FOR REAL FUCJ THAT GUY

Mega London: Your 7 foot long thing is not enough to make you equal a fraction of my rizz

Pd: Nolan Chance is not gay, I just think we males and theymales should be allowed to say to each other "hey, nice muscles bro" in the same way girls compliment each other. Let's go bros! Yeah, football!

[chaospossum]

Your idea of 'flirting' is to receive Jeff Goldblum nudes

You know what- you’re so right