#THATS WHAT I KEEP COMING BACK TO HONESTLY
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points gun shakily WHO TOLD LUDINUS THAT VAX EXISTED. WHO TOLD. HOW THE FUCK DID HE KNOW
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"Oh no, someone's attracted to the aesthetics of my -punk movement but doesn't know the praxis and history behind it like I do--"
OK. Tell them. Make it a teaching moment. Everyone who's in your movement learned the background from somewhere at some point, maybe this is that point for that person. Give them a jumping off point that they can dive into later.
"Oh but I shouldn't be responsible for teaching baby -punks about the history and the how-tos and--"
OK. Then don't tell them. You don't have to be responsible for teaching people with a budding interest in your group the ins and outs and how-tos. That's fair and valid! It can be a lot of work. Someone else will handle it
"But I'm annoyed that they would try to claim to be part of/be interested in my community without knowing all the details that I know after being in it for months/years/decades, they're dumb, they're posers, they're--"
OK. Then don't engage with them, if it's that bad. Maybe someone else will come around and tell them the history, maybe they'll pick it up on their own, maybe they'll just enjoy the fashion elements for awhile.
"But they shouldn't claim to be part of the -punk community if they don't know the--"
I feel like we have a few options here. People can either talk to them, share the history, share the values, share the praxis. Or they can just chase off anyone who even thinks about dipping a toe in their community, and then wonder why it's dying off later down the line.
I dunno, maybe I'm too naive and patient or whatever. But if people are entering your -punk spaces without knowing The Rundown of what you feel they need to know, maybe being nice about it and informing people instead of immediately assuming stupidity and malicious intent could help you make a new friend. Even the loudest voices in a space had to learn from somewhere, and not everyone has the luxury of being in the space as the History was Happening--whether it's an age thing or a not being aware of the space thing. Or maybe I just don't see what the big deal is behind people hating people who like the aesthetic of something and don't know the behind the scenes history about it yet.
Because I believe in the word 'yet.' No one comes into this world knowing everything about everything, and we're all constantly learning new things. I'm not gonna degrade someone and call them a poser for not knowing what I know. Because if it were me, interested in a scene but getting chased out and called a poser? I wouldn't hit the books and study up, I'd go 'that fuckin sucks, those people sucked' and then avoid anyone and anything having to do with it.
So chase people off and call them posers if you want. But if your community starts dwindling, don't be fucking shocked.
#out of queue#ani rambles#punks and posers#i cant even call this a 4am hot take because its 7pm but like#idk i keep seeing posts about like 'how DARE people think I bought my punk clothes how DARE they not know the how-tos and DIYs'#or 'ugh people only care about the ~aesthetics~ of my movement if you don't know shit get out of here' and like#maybe I'm just a shy ass introverted nerd whos scared of social rejection! but I avoid that shit like the plague#so if someone were to reject me based on not knowing about something I'd never even heard about? something i was JUST getting into?#there's a high chance I'd just scram and never look back. i don't wanna be the one who causes that emotion in someone else#granted this is coming from someone who STILL doesn't know how to make her own patches or worked up the courage to do direct action praxis#outside of offering neighbors to my tomatoes and trying to talk to people about what I'm passionate about#but still imo unless someone's a malicious intentional bad actor i dont see the point in scaring newbies off#thats how movements die imo#i know this is my solarpunk blog but its not a solarpunk specific thing#i think the main post that inspired this was about store-bought versus self-made spiked leather jackets#which honestly just feels petty to me but who knows.#might delete later
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I forgot how exhausting it is to sob, actually scream cry. it feels good and bad. my eyelids sting. i keep trying to get up and do things but everything just makes me feel sick.
#i know grieving is kinda universally difficult but like#the last time i truly needed to grieve sometjing was so long ago#this feels new again and its so hard#i just. i just keep turning around expecting to see him there#waiting for me#like it was all a bad dream#because it all happened so fast.#the animal er visit was like two hours tops. i thought id take him and theyd fix him up#get him home#i had no idea i needed to make that decision on the spot#really i had like five minutes to think about what to do for him#it was nightmarish honestly maybe thats why its not sinking in#it just all felt so cruel#i dont. i didnt want to believe it to be true#i still donr#please come home to me max#please come back i dont care if you bite me or bark at me#please just let me see you one more time
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its been 7 hours in the poll so far and i saw the who ppl want to win coming but i wasnt expecting the who they think will win ngl, like i was expecting it to be a little more even but nope lol
#mine.txt#lifesteal spoilers#< jic#wanted to keep my opinion to myself until the poll ended to prevent influence or whatever but realized that was stupid so here it is#personally i want zam to win but i think theyll come to a stalemate#i want zam to win causeas cute as it would be to give zam a redemption arc and esp by minute of all ppl i just dont like that idea very muc#i want his redemption arc if he ever decides to have one to be long and gruelling and full of setbacks and last for seasons#i want him to keep failing and building himself back up and all over again through the influence of multiple ppl and experiences#i dont want it to start and end all cause of one guy#and with ppl as stubborn as those two it would not surprise me if they reached a stalemate#esp since they seem to have completely incongruent mindsets regarding the nature of lifesteal#identical yet opposites those two#zam may think hes more determined than minute but i dont think thats true i think theyre a lil more even#like not to bring up kings but they both went looking for nether fortresses for hours in the first session#they both kept farming and grinding even when the odds are stacked against them#even when they lose hope they keep going anyway for that tiny sliver of a chance that Something happens#like theres a reason minute looked up to him in s3 and i think its cause he saw a lil bit of himself in zam#or at least what he could be if he set his mind to it#but honestly i dont really care who wins or loses that much#all i ask is that the season ends in an interesting way regardless of if its in peace or chaos#characterwise; plotwise; possibly even metawise#just give me something to chew on and ill be happy
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i need eddie to get another guy friend in season 8, and buck loses his shit about it (again), so he breaks up with t because he's convinced that the weird feeling he gets when he sees them together is because he is Really attracted to the new guy.
#like things with t are fine cuz he likes exploring this new side of himself even if t doesnt always match his energy but whatever its fun#and maybe at work chim is the one who brings up eddies new friend and he is immediately just. what new friend?#chim laughs and says. tbf last time eddie got a new friend you attacked him so you could date his friend. hes probably keeping it to himsel#and bucks like. dude what. that was. yeah it was shitty of me but it was a one time thing. i wont do it again...#and when eddie shows up for shift buck immediately asks about his new friend and eddie tells him about the guy without hesitation#after shift tho buck is like. why didnt you tell me about him? after t i get why you dont want to but im just. you dont have to worry man.#buck. i know. im not worried. anyway he and i are gonna head to a bar to catch the game. you want to come with? you can bring t if hes free#oh. thats. thatd be okay? i dont want to idk ruin the vibe by bringing a date#nah man. itll be fine#and so he and t go to the bar and eddies already inside with the new friend and its Fine. its Great actually because t gets along with eddi#and the new guy and the new guy makes eddie laugh and doesnt miss a beat and knows more about the teams record this season than buck and#buck is doing Fine. this guys smile is big and his eyes are bright and when he laughs he sorta leans into eddies space alittle and its Fine#the night ends and buck and t go back to his apartment and buck cant stop thinking about that guys hand when it clapped down on eddies#shoulder or the look on his face as he teased eddie about the beer he drinks (cuz its kinda bad but only buck can say that) and buck Cant.#he wants that guy. he wants his hands and grin and teasing voice all to himself and not on eddie.#so he breaks up with t and ts confused af cuz i thought things were going good?#yeah. i just. i want to explore my options yk now that ive uh figured out i like men.#and its a clean break. not dramatic or messy. t tells him to call if he every changes his mind. buck wont.#bucks trying to not pry about eddies new friend and he doesnt grill eddie or anyone and just waits and listens to all the new info he gains#and eventually eddie invites him out to watch another game because whatever team they were watching made it to the playoffs#and when he gets there eddies like. no t tonight?#nah we. uh. we broke up.#eddie says sorry man that sucks. and the new guy is like. honestly he didnt even seem that into you which what an idiot. youre great.#and its good because the new guy splits his attention between the two of them now. eddie isnt the only one getting hands and grins and eyes#and the third time theyre at the bar the guy follows him to bathroom and kisses him hard against the door before pulling back with a#panicked sorry and leaving and when buck finds eddie after hes like. what happened? new guy ran out of here without even saying goodbye#he kissed me in the bathroom. i think uh. i think he was kinda freaking out about it and thats why he left.#and eddie just blinks at him before being like. buck. buck you said you werent going to do this again.#i didnt mean to! and buck means it. he just saw the way that guy made eddie laugh and put his hands on eddie and had eddies attention and#oh.
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life really fucking sucks right now
#teddy situation has undone probably a year of recovering haha i fuckig hate landlords#basically told us we need to get rid of ted because 'he is a liability'#THE DAY BEFOREBTHANKSGIVING#and i was expected to be chipper and happy at family dinner.#naw man. i havent really left the house because i wana spend time with ted hahahaha#he's going to live at my sister's place but still. i dont want him to have to go#selfharmed as in nearly scraped the skin off the entire back of my left hand#WAS HIT WITH 'I HONESTLY FIGURED/EXPECTED YOU TO (SELF HARM' LIKE DAMN HAHA#idk. i want to be hit by a fucking car. or anything else that will blast me away.#had another prospective friend end up being just a dumbfuck that wanted an easy lay#dad's been home all week#its just a lot man. and losing all that progress i worked hard for its another kick to the teeth#and its like. why should i go see my therapist again. im gonna tell her whats wrong. im gonna cry. she oretends to care. i come home#i just dont want to be here anymore. i dont. i keep hoping for things to get better because thats what im told to do and things get worse#i cannot live the rest of my life like this. im allowed to be selfish and say it isnt fair to me. and nobody should be stucj dealing with me#im not gonna have a happy ending like all my friends did. im gonna be lonely and suicidal until i finally get thr balls to just fucking doit#local idiot sad
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sometimes i wish i wasnt a guy who gets so exhausted from writing even 1k words in a day's work bc there are fic ideas up there man,,, theyre not Great ideas but they exist at least....
#contextually from tumblr i have picked up that there might be a naddpod fic renaissance these days#like when i joined the fandom last yr the a o3 was pretty slow-going and mostly c1 based#but i keep seeing posts here with fic links#to c3 stuff (and also still c1)#have i read any of them? unfortunately no#but like. hell yeah love it for the fandom#i think theres a lot of char study stuff on there these days??#which honestly usually i Love but tbh for naddpod i feel like i get more entranced by other things besides pc char study#which!! to be clear i still support and enjoy#but like. not as heavily in this fandom weirdly as i have in previous fandoms#actually? i lied#now that im thinking abt it i need 18 intense zirk character study fics#im one of those fucking 'i was born in the wrong era' girls but instead i mean i shouldve been listening to naddpd when c2 was airing#thats my annoying trait tbh#ineed intense character study. i t just needs to be about stella vervain.#ok clearly im still a little unwell even tho i went to work todya bc these tags are ramblier than usual even for me#idk what this is. sorry if u read thsi btw. usually my long block of tags are actually so woke and cool#i swear. fucking trust me bro pls#my best content is buried in tags usually. this is the exception. pleas come back . i promise i promise
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fuck akuroku as a ship btw not only because its pedophilic because thats obviously a huge issue. but also i think we should be able to have platonic relationships with the same amount of devotion as any romance. not everyone who loves each other is in love DEREK.
#not trying to downplay the issues with it being pedophilic because thats actually a huge issue#context for my non kh moots#as of kh3 lea/axel is roughly late 20s#maybe early 30s depending on how old he was in bbs#and roxas is (physically) 14-16 (hes only been alive for a bit over a year#but also what i want to say#axel and roxas have an amazingly written relationship#theyre two of the strongest characters in the series in terms of writing honestly#their dynamic in canon is two best friends who at the end of the day just want to stay together#but due to circumstances and also a bit of axel keeping secrets shit falls apart#when you get to kh2 roxas is gone and axel will do literally ANYTHINNG to bring him back#he doesnt care about his own life or soras or anyone else who stands in his way because he is going to get his friend back#axels role as an antagonist later in kh2 comes from his devotion#he wants roxas back. he says himself he wanted to see roxas again because he made him feel as though he had a heart#in the end he gives up and dies to protect sora#and i think a lot of people take 'he made me feel like i had a heart' out of context to say its romantic#at face value its easy to interpret it that way but in context he goes on to say 'its funny... you make me feel the same' to sora#the way i interpreted it at least wasnt that he was in love but that both roxas and sora's love for others radiated onto him#if we look at days (i know. sacrelige for a kh2 discussion. fuck you) axel is constantly questioning why roxas acts like he has a heart#he straight up asks him why he does that and roxas is confused. thats just how he is#<- context for that conversation is that roxas is upset on xions behalf because saïx called her a mistake#what he means by 'having a heart' is feeling things and caring about things and there is no inherent romantic connotation#he means in the most literal sense that roxas made him care about things. we dont know what exactly that was referencing in kh2#but we can take a pretty good fucking guess#but lets look at com for a second because theres a scene talking about the other half of that line#axel goes behind everyones back to do something to help sora and naminé and after he does he is SHOCKED to realize hes enjoying it#and then he says 'you really ARE something!' about sora#at least as of kh2 what they meant was feeling emotions. roxas made axel feel as though he had emotions. he made him feel like he could feel#anyways. what im saying is axels line could be taken as something romantic but i think its more interesting than that#i dont have enough tags left to continue word vomiting sorry </3
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i madeeee sillay new characters and i love them
#my post#will post drawings tomorrow. tired.#BUT!! there are superheroes and this sillay. honestly very minor criminal. villain of the week type guy. but she never gets caught so she#just keeps coming back to cause problems. her name is bonnie and shes a shapeshifter and i love her. but anyways one day shes fighting thes#guys and falls off a bridge. now this is not actually an issue for her bcus she can simply Have Wings if she wants to. but she chooses to#use this to fake her death bcus shes tired of these guys and wants to try to take them down from the inside.#so she returns under the name lyra and becomes like a sidekick to them. only she is absolutely shocked to discover that the one hero- real#name oslo- has been MOURNING HER??? apparently they feel terrible for causing her 'death' and never truly hated her and are wracked with#guilt about it???? bonnie does not know how to feel about this it is incredibly weird actually.#the other hero is named merrick and she does not give a shit she thought bonnie was annoying as hell. unfortunately for her 'lyra' also#just so happens to enjoy annoying her to hell and back. yay.#also oslo n merrick have day jobs as office workers for a Large and Productive cheesecake corporation.#i couldnt think of what to make their company do so i made it very serious paperwork about cheesecakes#i think lyra would be like. idk. janitor. or delivery person.#OH DID I MENTION THEYRE ALL ANIMALS. i wanted to draw animals is the reason why#oh oh oh the NAMES the NAMES#so weve got bonnie goose the mongoose. bonnie bcus i wanted to base it on mongoose> mon goose> monnie goose> bonnie goose#lyra reeves the . dog of unspecified breed so far. maybe scottish terrier or schnauzer. i like their rectangular heads. shes a dog bcus i#thought itd be funny to take a Loyal animal and make her betray them lol. also lyra is a constellation of a lyre > rhymes with liar.#and reeves is from lyre > orpheus > reeve c.arney lol#merrick wolfe the maned wolf :3 i dont have anything deeper on this one its just m and then wolf. however her superhero name is red fox#which i think is funny. she has fire powers.#and oslo stone :] large bear. idk what kind ill probably be boring and just make em a brown bear. in my heart shes a black bear but brown#is easier to color. um um erm oslo bcus it is one letter off from oso which is bear in spanish. stone bcus i liked how it sounded also her#superhero name is boulder and she has superstrength lol#thats all of em so far :3 its so fun and sillay and i love themmmm#i love drawing merrick the most
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Sewerhell Sunday again
Uhhhh post-Ruin/Mimic encounter, Cassie becomes friends with all of Mimic's previous guards very quickly. This is especially the case in situations where they helped guide her and Roxy into defeating Mimic.
The other three guards were the original Roxy, Mangle and the first Foxy. The last time these three dealt with Mimic, it tore Mangle and Foxy's friendship apart. Foxy genuinely hates both of them for what happened and they hate him in return but they all agree that Cassie is more important.
Cassie doesn't blame any of them for what happened before or what happened to her. She's the most sympathetic human they've ever met. Roxy's original (now mostly known as Rockabella or Bella/Rocky for short) in particular was brought to tears within minutes of their first meeting, that's how good she is to them. She understands they struggle to get along and makes a point to hang out with all three of them.
In the setup where the manager fucks the security up and Sewerhell breaks loose, the three older guards end up with an interesting bond with Roxy too. These are the only three animatronics in existence that know the full extent of what she's had to deal with for years and unsurprisingly, that's something she's needed for a very long time. Mangle adopted her as a little sister almost immediately, Bella was a bit slower, offering support but also not really knowing what to do, and while Roxy knows that this Foxy hates her by association, she also has a sneaking suspicion he's taking a slow and gradual shine to her. He's threatened to kill her. She's completely unphased. He's never once even so much as poked her, never mind hurt her.
Honestly, he's got beef with a lot of Sewerhell guys, there's a lot of people telling both Roxy and Cassie to be careful around him. He doesn't really know what to do with these two. He wouldn't hurt Cassie, but he could hurt Roxy. He could! He swears he could! It would take nothing to beat the shit out of her! He could do it!
He's also a fucking liar! Who woulda thought?
#sewerhell sunday#plex history: roxy#plex history: foxy#plex history: mangle#fly's plex history#i might reblog this with a comparison to roxy and foxy 2's relationship dynamic because like#yeah... lmao#yeah there's. a log of stuff between the four guards#eight guards if you include the minis#it's. interesting to say the least and they all love cassie so much#foxy 1 avoids her and roxy like the fucking plague but they keep ending up spending time with him#and he doesn't know what to do so he's just kinda. pushing back against roxy and letting cassie do whatever#he's so mean btw. roxy listens to him and is just like 'hah... yeah' though#he's so mean to HER to and she's just fucking hitting him with the fact she's heard worse every time#like. whadda hell. that was the most biting insult he could throw at her and she just. what do you MEAN you've heard WORSE?!#he's not as good at this as he thinks he is lmao. he keeps calling her a furby though#this is the only time he ever talks to mangle now#just like MANGLE COME GET YOUR FUCKING FURBY BEFORE I RIP ITS BATTERIES OUT#mangle gets there and it turns out roxy just fucking DESTROYED him in mario kart.#he hates this game. stupid gane for babies. evil horrible nasty game. it's rigged that's what it is.#she's laughing her ass off about it by the way. if you couldn't guess#bsjdndid nah honestly these two just kinda sit and sometimes talk#she says he's always welcome in her raceway and he boils on the inside because he shouldn't be and she shouldn't be there#indebted to him in that scenario i mentioned. she fucking hugged him in tears once she was out and thanked him so sincerely#and he can't get that out of his head and he doesn't know what to fucking do about it or her#JHSIDJSONSID WAIT IF I GIVE HIM THE FORTRESS AND ROXY HASN'T DISCOVERED IT YET#FUCKING SJDBISJSO 'RIGHT! THATS IT! YER GOIN TO THE TUBES!!'#'the WHAT now???' he's dragging her by her foot and she WAS gonna break away but whats the tubes??? huh??#just drops her in the fortress ballpit or something and leaves her in there with her minis#all he can hear through the door is her like WOAH WHAT THE FUCK IS THIS PLACE?!
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nvm I'll write an essay now but in the tags because i like writing that way
#look its just like. theyre those characters that are meant to be friends no matter where or what#basically destined to be friends#I keep thinking about the episode where ruff tries finding the 'perfect home' for blossom and that perfect home is his doghouse#and they play it off as a joke in the episode but like. did the show realize what it just said?!?#its why she comes back in season 3 and stays around#shes never seen to leave again which leads me to believe she just permanently is staying there with ruff and thats so important to me#when I was watching the show season 1 at first felt fine w/o blossom but going back and rewatching it feels so empty#and honestly ruff wouldn't get his character development w/o blossom there either#and THEN they're still friends in the spinoffs too like ruff is living with blossom in trrs#even in completely different circumstances they're still together#idk why but this friendship is so important to me. even though it looks like theyre always at odds they really aren't#still thinking about that entry in hmg. ill post the screenshot later maybe but they clearly value each other's company#arrgggghhhh. oupy and kity best friends forever#fwrr#seaspeak
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i did like the hidden palace but (SPOILER if anyone hasn't read it?) i'm genuinely so annoyed at how Arbeely is handled like... I wish i could be sad but i'm just fucking irritated. I was overly invested in him and that's def why but i just feel like they did him dirty
#the golem and the jinni#i was scrolling goodreads and the take i kept seeing was 'oh I wish Arbeely could've had his family too bad the jinni FUCKED IT UP'#but idk that's just not how i read him. like thats not where i feel the problem is#his whole shtick is being content as the jinni's foil and like! things can change! but the way it's done leaves him totally unresolved#which in turn means the jinni's shit is also never getting resolved because there is like no way to#when Arbeely describes his future family in the first book it's all 'someday... vaguely...' and AGAIN! what you want can change!#and honestly it's really interesting and sad that he makes this sacrifice for the jinni#but it's a layer of complexity that like clashes with how little he is there for and how little the author's invested in him#and like the way the no marriage literally did not ruin his life at all... sure it sucked but the man is still like idk rich#what has continuously fucked with him throughout both books is that he wants (or at least spends half his page time thinking about)#emotional connection to the jinni in a human way#which is something the jinni cant\wont give him even though he's basically Arbeely's only close friend#(besides ig maryam who was rlly funny hinting at her dislike for the jinni like someone trying to get their friend to dump their toxic bf)#anyway the vibe in the first book is that he only thinks about wanting a wife when the jinni is being a dickhead#BECAUSE the jinni eases arbeelys loneliness by just being there because at the end of the day that's what humans need#but then it's made really weird in the second book by Arbeely getting 'trapped' by the jinni (and yet they just grow further apart)#which means that the only thing arbeely actually spent half his life discontent with and then literally died without is not a wife#it's emotional intimacy with the jinni. which is insane to me#arbeely is obviously already tragic but this seems TOO tragic entirely because the book doesn't give af about addressing it#if it was like a plot thing then all of the above would be fine and gutwrenching because it ties back into the jinnis self isolation#BUT IT'S NOT. like i get arbeely isn't that important to the plot but he was important to the jinni and the jinni was important to him#alsoo necessarily disclaimer i'm not trying to say he's in love with the jinni or anything like that#although a queer arbeely (divorced from the above idea) would also been interesting cuz I dont think the jinni has a grasp on homophobia#so idk theyd be keeping each others secrets (arbeely x the biscuit man? JOKE)#BUTTTT! I don't believe he needs romantic energy! him and the jinni having awful vibes up until arbeely's literal death is what bothers me#The jinni is a bad communicator ik but come on... not once? not even before the diagnosis? The jinni also thinks about how distant they are#could they not talk a little? for me? there are ways to do it within the bounds of their characters FOR SURE#im sure this is the point but i do dislike it either way. anyway sorry arbeely u remind me of my uncle#the hidden palace
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HI TUMBLR late footnote posting before i go to bed (i took a nap today........ ate up most of my time)
not a lot to talk about with footnotes today since i was Busy and my brain wasnt working pfndkmlfd i blame seven hours of modded oneblock
#haunted ecosystem#haunted bookshelf#i might make a tag for these footnote posts? i think its a fun way to document what ive written about without sharing All of it#also yes thats a random crack au that i've have in the back of my head for a bit what about it#i dont think its canon in the slightest its just a funny little thing in my head for writing random bs#honestly i might start trying to work on more wtds stuff. this is kind of a perfect excuse#also! i think how i might work this is that if i work on a larger project during the day then i'll just do the daily prompt#since its a good exercise and an excuse to keep some kind of writing streak going#i actually asked one of my partners for a prompt since i was struggling to find an interesting one#ended up with 'last man standing' for spoke... very fitting tbh#i might write a more canon take for that. the concept i wrote down was much more set in an au than anything since i was also thinking#about asomatous zam at the same time so i kind of just incorparated both of them into it with it being paracosm-era#OH did i ever mention that i have a general title plan for the other parts of that kind of. world#its very set in stone that if i do write more it'll be two more parts#metamorphosis (5 part) and paracosm (1 part with multiple scenes. functionally 3 part maybe?)#asomatous goes in the middle of that. i need to kind of plan all of them out better and see how it wants to flow#metamorphosis was started as a concept because i had a few bad things happen bingo prompts i wanted to be used for asomatous#but didnt end up using. so metamorphosis is my excuse for that. paracosm is just a Concept thats been really plaguing me basically since i#originally wrote asomatous... i should probably come up with a temporary series title. i think something about shattering skies?#its a reoccurring theme and symbol throughout all of them....... i just think its neat#ANYWAYS goodnight to you especially if you actually read through all my tags :)
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Read in 2022:
My Heart is a Chainsaw; Jade Daniels #1 – Stephen Graham Jones (Dec. 21-Jan 22)
We Have Always Lived in the Castle – Shirley Jackson (Jan)
All Systems Red; Murderbot Diaries #1 – Martha Wells (Jan)
The Wind’s Twelve Quarters short story collection – Ursula K. Le Guin (Jan)
Always Coming Home – Ursula K. Le Guin (UNFINISHED; SKIMMED – Jan)
A Desolation Called Peace; Teixcalaan #2 – Arkady Martine (Jan – May)
Death’s End; Three Body #3 – Liu Cixin (UNFINISHED – Jan – May – ?)
Artificial Condition; Murderbot Diaries #2 – Martha Wells (Feb – March)
Off the Edge: Flat Earthers, Conspiracy Culture, and Why People will Believe Anything – Kelly Weill (Feb – March)
The Appeal – Janice Hallett (Feb)
Black Leopard, Red Wolf; Dark Star #1 – Marlon James (Feb – March DNF AGAIN :( )
In Love – Amy Bloom (March)
Woman Eating – Claire Kohda (April)
Help/Thanks/Wow: The Three Essential Prayers – Anne Lamott (April)
We Had a Little Real Estate Problem: The Unheralded Story of Native Americans in Comedy – Kliph Nesteroff (Apr – May)
The Raven Tower – Ann Leckie (May – June)
Overdue: Reckoning with the Public Library – Amanda Oliver (May)
The Sign for Home – Blair Fell (May)
The Name of the Wind; Kingkiller Chronicle #1 – Patrick Rothfuss (May – still not finished)
The Fifth Season; Broken Earth #1 – N. K. Jemison (May – July)
Dracula; via the Dracula Daily read-along email club – Bram Stoker (May – Nov)
How to Keep House While Drowning: A Gentle Approach to Cleaning and Organizing – K.C. Davis
Rogue Protocol; Murderbot Diaries #3 – Martha Wells (June)
Sonnetts from the Portuguese – Elizabeth Barrett Browning (June)
The Cyrano Factor – Medievalchic on AO3 (June) (I read so little fanfiction and it was novella-length so I felt compelled to count it)
Harlem Sunset: Louise Lloyd #2– Nekesa Afia <3 (June – July)
“Drive” from Nobody’s Magic short story collection – Destiny O. Birdsong (June – July)
Something that May Shock and Discredit You – Daniel Lavery (June)
One Hundred Years of Solitude – Gabriel Garcia Marquez (June – Aug)
Get In Trouble short story collection – Kelly Link (July)
Devil House – John Darnielle (July)
The Swimmers – Julie Otsuka (July)
The Tale of Beren & Luthien – J.R.R. Tolkien (July)
The Goblin Emperor – Katherine Addison (July – Aug)
The Thief – Megan Whalen Turner (REREAD – DNF – Aug)
Lady Churchill’s Rosebud Wristlet (zine) #45 – (Aug)
Paths of Dissent: Soldiers Speak Out Against America’s Misguided Wars – ed. Andrew Bacevich & Daniel A. Sjursen (Aug)
Cyrano de Bergerac – Edmond Rostand (REREAD - first time since high school! - Aug – Sept)
Practical Magic – Alice Hoffman (REREAD – DNF – Sept)
Can’t We Talk About Something More Pleasant – Roz Chast (Sept)
Rosemary & Rue; October Daye #1 – Seanan McGuire (Sept)
Nona the Ninth; Locked Tomb #3 – Tamsyn Muir (Sept)
A Local Habitation; October Daye #2 – Seanan McGuire (Sept – Oct)
I’m Glad My Mom Died – Jennette McCurdy (Oct)
A Choir of Lies – Alexandra Rowland (Oct-Nov)
An Artificial Night; October Daye #3 – Seanan McGuire (Oct – Dec)
The Dawn of Everything: A New History of Humanity – David Graeber & David Wengrow (Nov 22 – ? still reading)
Leech – Hiron Ennes (Dec)
all told i've read a total of 48 books this year, which is way more than i thought i'd read when i was going through my list. technically it's probably closer to 40 because some of the books are DNFs or books i'm still trying to finish - but nonetheless i think i had a pretty varied and rewarding reading experience this year! the list for next year is everything i didn't read on this year's list, plus like two small steno pages of books i've written down since then - about 220 books. i'll probably add even more as the year goes on.
#i should post pics of what my lists look like they're crazy long#but i love keeping them in a physical little notepad#i should honestly make one for stuff i watch or sewing projects too but thats like ridiculous for shows#because i always get halfway through and then take a break and come back months later#which doesnt fit with my checking-off-a-finished-thing system#i COULD do it with the projects though and i think i will
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oh fuck lovebomb started playing and it set off my fight or flight instincts
#my post#i hear that opening Wom Wom Wom Wom and sit up straight in a cold sweat#i still hear it in my dreams sometimes#i captain chip do solemnly swear to fuck shit up to help those in need and to be the best goddamn pirates anyone has ever seen we need to#get these pirates inside now did we ever get a name for what theyre called the riptide pirates BAAANANANANANANANNANANANANAA hey guys check#this out YES whos laughing now fuckers fuck you ok if anyone can clear the gauntlet its the riptide pirates get to the center of the prison#thats your out we need to hget him out of here is he even still alive its worth a shot BLOW YOU AWAY gillion youre not actually the chosen#one chip i think youre irresponsible and incompetent and honestly youre a danger to everyone around you chip arlins probably dead and you#need to move on and live for yourself and your own destiny jay i think youre ugly and no one will ever love you gillion i think this place#is playing more than one trick on us its not us chip its this place stay back dont make me do this do what you have to hey there little nei#wait a fucking minute wait drey who put you in here it wasnt one of hey brother you have a lot of explaining to do but come and maybe ill#let them go and what if i dont come with you youd rather be a pirate then i will show you what youre up against you wanna take on a pirate#im right here stop please just stop if i come with you will you let them leave we swore an oath chip its gonna be okay discipline them jay#you wanna know my secret so bad chip i convinced the navy to let me go undercover i was just using you i dont care what you were before thi#youre a riptide pirate now what do you really want jay and just say it so i can fight for it i wanna keep adventuring with you guys gill#thats all i want right now jay because you are my duaghter i will give yoy a headstart but when i catch you you will no longer be a daughte#to me just another piratee BAAAHHH gill youre not going down that easy buddy were not leaving you behindAUAGDSHGH jay my anme is jay ferin#co captain of the riptide pirates im gonna trust my friends were gonna fuck shit up im gonna be the best goddamn pirate youve ever seen#i dont doubt it sureshot
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"Why are all SK fans proshippers" Silence fetus
#text#mind you SK was released in a very different time period where fandoms back in the day were built different. freaks strived and#everyone back in the day followed fandom etiquette “ship and let ship” and “dont like dont read”. fandoms back in the old day were#peaceful and supported one another. ppl shipped anything and everyone and ppl minded their own business in the early 2000s#thats how almost all old sk veteran fans i know turn out to be what they are today#(ofc there are some. other veteran folks i do not fuck with as theyre also genuine assholes and are hypocrites/ostracizes others.#. but another discussion for another day lol. you must be a level 100+ of friendship to unlock my tragic sk fan backstory)#also news flash all of your favorite anime/manga stories are all written by profic ppl! thats right! everyone in japan are profic#shocking i know#japanese folks dont give a flying rat ass when it comes to FICTIONAL morals because they know how to differentiate between fic and reality#the fact that so many antis keep on twisting the word proship so many times to the point where its widely misinterpreted and ppl#nowadays esp the younger gen easily believe in the misinformation and keep repeating the cycle of misinformation in modern fandoms today#it pisses me off honestly#but yeah what did you expected from a old series that came out in the late 90s. the fact that theyre consuming the series when the series#itself also literally has problematic elements too lol#and see this is why im glad SK is niche despite that i wish it was popular so it can bring in more renmei fans but in the end its better of#being niche#because had it blown up it wouldve attracted all of the chronically online kids/puritans/fandom police and ruin everything for everyone#modern fandom today is the reason why all fandoms suck nowadays and its why i gave up joining and being part of them#theres discrimination everywhere in modern fandoms. oh your a proshipper? gtfo DNI and kys!!!!11111#its like theres eggshells everywhere no matter where you go. you have to abide with morality and puritanical rules its the “automatic” law#but fuck that thats never been the automatic law in fandoms lol. Ship and let ship AND dont like dont read is the real fandom laws here lol#but back to what i want to also say. theres nothing you can do about SK fans being proshippers. the old fans has always operated that way#since the old times. either adapt / cope with it OR you can just. block everyone and preserve your peace. which takes like 10 seconds#this is like maybe the 15th SK puritan fan i know lol. then again i also know theres ALOT of renmei antis who follow the puritan mindset#imao. I say this alot many times but SK fandom is only ugly and almost everyone becomes a puritan when renmei gets mentioned#which has always made me ????????????????? so yall can handle yoyo boy and anna teen preg can handle serg getting groomed/manipulated#by marc and xes laws can handle kids getting their arms and legs ripped off can handle kids getting killed left and right#can handle shipping bruce lee whos like plenty years older than JUN which btw beginning of the series she starts off being 17#but a 4 year age gap between ren and jeanne is too much apparently and should be cancelled. geez louise
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