#Tev Pretends To Be An Artist

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Can't wait for him to come back and find out that half of the server declared war against him.

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This was our MTGinktober for “Ship,” starring Precinct Captain and its corresponding Soldier Token!  Yes, I totally ship them--I have seen it. Seen the end, seen the beginning, the beginning of the end--and I have the photos to back it up, which I collected over the years during my time in the Boros Legion.

Relax, spare me the “thank you for your service” stuff, I was just a Legion photographer.  I never saw combat.  Though I did get a papercut once, which technically qualified me for a Purple Core signet--and don’t get it mindtwisted, “technically qualified” is the best kind of qualified, though I grant you that paranoia’s all I got left on that theory.  Look, I wanted to go to photography school, but figured it’d be smarter to do the Boros work-study program in the Arts and Propaganda (A&P) department, since I could study photography, do nominal but obligatory (and minimal) soldier stuff, get out after my term was up, and then use that sweet, sweet Boros bonus to start my own studio.  They were desperate for recruits back then (no idea what it’s like nowadays, don’t really keep up), so they just threw money at unguilded chumps to enlist. 

I should note this was during the disastrous “Feathernomics” period of exorbitant deficit spending on recruitment and propaganda, which is why I had it so good as a new enlistee in the A&P department (our nickname was “Twinkle Toes Company.”  Other companies did that “OOH-Rah! OOH-Rah! OOH-Rah-Rah!” chant you always see in the spectacles, but they’d shout “OOH-Lah!” at us, as in “Ooh-la-la.” It was stupid.).  So I wasn’t exactly Agrus Kos, ok?  Just a photographer too cheap to go to a proper art school and aware enough to take basically free money for the inconvenience of doing all that idiotic marching and saluting nonsense while having to dress like 80,000 of my closest friends. 

But today is a salute to just two of these fellow marching enthusiasts.  I can’t believe it never really clicked until I was going over some old photos from back in the day as research for an upcoming project (I’m doing a pictorial book on daily Boros life, plug plug plug), but I kept seeing these two doofs together in photo after photo, so here’s what I remember:

I wasn’t terribly close with anyone in the service, (again, just there for the [essentially] paid education), but my staffbook confirms the guy’s name is Sten Scott, the girl is Tev Pres.  I was embedded in the Ravnica 254th Precinct Corps to cover them for one training cycle to simulate wartime conditions, so I had to be a fly on the wall and they had to pretend I didn’t exist, meanwhile I was popping up out of bushes and from under eaves, snapping photos like a filthy Hazoret. These guys were part of the newest wave of recruits and the earliest photo I found of them was right after they presumably first met at the orientation party for new enlistees in the Noble 254th, which is why they’re in their full cadet uniforms.

Scott was nervous because he didn’t know anybody and wasn’t really gelling with anyone, but Pres was super outgoing and forged a fast friendship.  She was the life of the party, especially a party of two, so that’s why I remember wanting to follow her around at the party because she got all these great reactions from people, which made for great candid shots--I hate static, posed shots, is there anything more pointless? 

Scott was from a higher up family, but I gather he was running from his roots since the 254th is known for being comprised of, shall we say “less financially-secure” families?  He definitely didn’t talk about his family life, that’s for sure.  For my own curiosity one night, I do recall pulling his file for “research” (Twinkle Toes credentials has its perks), and yeah, his family was pretty loaded.  He should have been in Champagne Company like all the other snots.  His file says he was indeed placed there originally, but filed a transfer request before he even arrived on campus.  And they granted it.  Curious.

Pres came from a larger family, according to her file, so that’s probably where she got her more outgoing personality, necessarily screaming over siblings to get a word in, and being generous in her affection for those close to her.  254th families are famously close-knit because for many of them, they need their families jealously looking out for each other in order to survive their rougher districts.  That’s why they call it the “Noble 254th,” there’s so much pride in that Corps: their motto is Fogi di Pesn to Nobus di Regi, “The fire of peasants and the nobility of kings.” 

So Pres was like your best friend set to eleven, everything was amplified with her, like she didn’t want an ounce of life wasted.  She obviously sticks out in my memory more than Scott, but as a “professional,” I tried to maintain my impartiality in my daily rounds of covering the 254th, but judging by my catalog, I invariably found myself gravitating towards photographing her and by extension Scott since these guys were like two shells in a Mortarpod ever since that orientation party.

I’ll briefly address here that there was always that controversial aspect of the Noble 254th.  Honorable in conduct, but always with that iffy aftertaste of perpetuating the cynical cycle of the poor fighting rich men’s battles, who would rather send their kids to various Azorius schools for legal training, or if they must enlist in the Legion, then they’d cut straight to higher-placed officer training, like the aforementioned “Champagne Company,” which of course had the widest outbreak of “bone spurs” you’d ever come across.  Those poor, delicate orchids.  Yeah, I’m one to talk, twinkle twinkle.  Regardless, I never heard of anyone rejecting Champagne placement before--nor did anyone else since Scott conveniently never brought it up. 

Anyway, the photo under the one from orientation is from boot camp.  You always went on IPT (Independent Physical Training) with a buddy to spot you, and these two randomly got paired that first week--pairing was random the first three weeks, after which you elected your buddy having had a breadth of experiences with fellow Legionnaires--I do respect the Boros embrace of the perfect balance of randomness and order, as dealing with these factors is a necessary life skill they make sure you master, even we Twinklers. 

I remember this day of IPT pretty well because I love the rain and we all got entangled in this one, despite my otherwise stellar ability to stay out of subjects’ ways.  Pres got caught in a sudden downpour during an IPT session, but fortunately Scott had brought an umbrella for that day since, unlike his more spontaneous colleague, he had actually heeded the morning’s weather intel.  She promised to pay more attention next time and gave a hug of relief to her trusty backup “fuddy-duddy-in-chief” (I believe was the rank she ascribed him, even addressing him in written communications as FDIC Scott rather than his proper rank).  He sheepishly brushed off all credit to the umbrella, as if it were only randomly packed in his supplies that day, and he only perfunctorily lectured her about compromising the rescue mission by getting him just as soaked as her when she rested her sopping wet head on his shoulder. 

We were all packed under an awning or something when I snapped this photo, and this is where I got the impression they might have something going on, looking back on these old photos, though to be fair, most people I talked to think it was just her being naturally more tactile, and him being over-prepared as always and being unable to handle *Solemn Simulacrum voice* hu-man e-mo-tions (he definitely chilled out the more they were together, though, and these photos certainly capture how comfortable he felt around her).  I dunno. I do know they became pretty much inseparable after that, and were always on the same squad, obviously did their future elected IPT together, everything. Again, easily just that “spirit bond” soldiers get, but come on.  Look at them.

I mean, during Rec Day, the 254th’s annual mid-bootcamp morale festival, they of course hit up the photobooth and snapped all these cheesy buddy shots.  Before you ask, I processed the photos, so I have a copy in my records--I didn’t mug them for these like a Bramble Creeper, all right?  Anyway, again, I guess you could flip a coin on this photo-roll as evidence, pro or con.  They were pretty close by then, half-way through bootcamp, spending bloody, sweaty, and teary hours upon hours together, so maybe it’s just them being pals, having achieved dat soulbond doe. 

Real talk, though, that’s how the Boros gets you.  They lure you in with some attractive benefits package, you build these absurdly strong bonds with your partner or squad, and then you end up re-upping after your term is up, signing longer and longer contracts, and before you know it, you’re off fighting for some rich, bloated Orzhov oligarch who doesn’t even know who you are and would without hesitation send you to die to secure him a greater tax cut or clear out unguilded protestors who figured out what’s up, etc. The house always wins if you play long enough.  Twinkle Toes Company is full of artists and diva creatives, so the turnover is higher, thus we don’t suffer from that unfortunate development of blind obedience.  Besides, who would ever trust an artist on anything worthwhile? Seriously. 

The last photo is from their commencement ceremony afterparty, I was on photography duty of course, so all photos got that dumb, overly formal, commemorative dressing at the bottom.  As meh as I am about the Boros, or the guilds in general--it’s all a scam, man, every guild is just out for your cash in the end, yes, even the Gruul (if you think Bobo ain’t gettin’ paid, wow, I’ve got a Planar Bridge I’d like to sell you)--regardless of all that, I thought it was cool to see them in their formal uniforms at long last.  Even I get a little emotional seeing companies finally don their fray apparel, ok?  It’s the spectacle of it, I guess.  I’m a photographer, I appreciate visuals.  But I mean, who doesn’t get caught up in all that?  Be human.  Or whatever. Goat people, whatever you call them.  You know what I mean. I just had the good sense to get out when my contract was up.  I shredded my guild card and have been living just peachy out here unguilded, though I do collect my vet check every month. Thank you for your postal service.   

The last document...I won’t tell you how I got it.  I won’t tell you who wrote it.  I will say though...how many letters do you write to mere friends like that?  It turns out that commencement party photo was the last time they ever saw each other because, as far as I know, one of the two found this letter slid under-door the next morning and meanwhile the other was already off on a separate assignment on a totally different plane.  No transfer requests in the file, nothing. Silence.

Even if you know you’ll never see them again by virtue of the sheer time and space imminently separating you...Do you ever tell your friends you love them?  Ought you to?  Am I just an emotionally stunted photographer living vicariously through my subjects, being unable to live life myself, and can only rely on the fantasies I invent about the vivacious people I cover to bring me any semblance of a satisfactory life? Don’t answer that.

Love,

Thanks,

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Not normal,

Reuxben

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I have been converted into a Nature Wives truther

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This is ours now.

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Emptober Day 2 - Flying

Witch goes nyooom-

No blur version:

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"Katherine as a little princess beating everybody up!" "Katherine as a buff princess beating everybody up!" Fellas, fellas. Why not both? *Does a little She-Ra transformation that makes u mad*

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Something feels wrong.

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Oops, my hand slipped again.

(A remake of an old art. Happy pride month!)

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Season 1 Empiresona go brrr-

Meet Tev of House Gardenia! A few details about them under the cut

They are a Fae born in the Overgrown under House Gardenia (refer to this post to see my headcanons on the Overgrown, where I mention the concept of Houses o3o). Their family owns a tea shop, which means E!Tev makes some pretty darn good tea you won't find in other empires.

As a collector of flowers and an absolute plant nerd, they took the job of identifying and cataloguing all the plantlife in the Overgrown. They also spend a lot of time in other empires as to keep track of their fascinating flora and register the differences between those and their own homeland.

Gilded Helianthia is by far one of their favourite places to visit. Despite being shy, they've come to know many of the people in the small empire, given the amount of times they spent the night over. And yes, they absolutely lost their mind when the giant beanstalk began to sprout. They would help Pearl investigate it and document its development, and sometimes just stare at it in awe. They didn't come back home for at least a month.

Another place they absolutely adore is the Grimlands. E!Tev has made it their life goal to understand all the properties and logistics of wither roses, and the Grimlands happen to have the biggest wither rose field in the entire continent. They used to get sick often from handling these cursed flowers for so long, but they have since developed some resistance; also gloves, they learned to wear gloves.

Once they heard about the wonders that the magical Gem Crystals had been doing to plants and mushrooms, they started taking an unusual interest in Crystal Cliffs. No amount of bargaining or begging would convince Gem to give them the crystals, especially not after all the shenanigans her allies had been pulling with them. So Tev often tries to take them without her noticing, which ultimately got them banned from any of her structures.

The vine-like markings on their arms are a pretty common birth mark for their kind. Those vines can grow to cover other parts of their body when they're under extreme stress.

Their coat is a bit too big on them, yes. It was way too many pockets, which is good, because they carry way too many things around. Small books and notebooks, quills, gloves, a gardening supply kit, a potions kit, an extra pair of glasses, a teacup, first aid kit, seeds and just about anything they find that fits in their cartoonishly big inside pockets. There is a game amongst those who know them called What Random Stuff Can You Find In Tev's Pockets. It gets heated.

They hold very deep admiration for Katherine. Seen as they report their new findings and the current state of the flower forest directly to the Guardian, they've personally gotten to know of her kindness and dedication to the Overgrown. If she ordered them to burn all of their books, they would-

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Enigma's little baby brother. He's a gremlin. He thinks Lessie is the coolest person in the world. His brother loves him.

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Happy Oldening Day to me

Tev is Old Now

That's what birthdays are, right? Yeah. I'm pretty sure that's it

When you hit a new decade and still have absolutely no idea what you're doing with your life, amirite-

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You’ve been teaching them the dark arts, haven’t you?

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And finally, the last member of Lessie’s crew of misfits! I can’t believe all of them finally have actual appearances :D

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Haha help, I made another one-

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At this point I’ve just resigned to making the entirety of Lessie’s crew while I’m still inspired, whaddup-

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Would you look at that! Another Sonic OC! What am I doing?!

Trinket is a good friend of Lessie’s, and one of the last ones. She’s quite the inventor and... optimistic to a fault...