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toomanyf4ndoms7 · 2 years

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Krypt traveller Koncept.

Random anon, I hope it’s good enough.

Bio:

Collecting: Across the realms, there is a legend of a master thief. His true name and history is known only to him, to many he is known as the traveller. He has scoured countless realms in search of riches, narrowly avoiding death at every turn. His recent looting of the abandoned island of Shang Tsung has earned him powerful artefacts, ones that can certainly help him with his next acquisition: The hourglass.

Gear:

Mask: (Select Animation: The camera pans up to his face. He has no mask less because I feel that exposing his face, even though we saw it in aftermath, would ruin the mystique. So, he has cloth masks, metal masks, masks that come with a hood, masks that cover his full face, etc.

Keepsake: (Select animation: Camera pans down to his belt, which has an object hanging on it.) The objects include: a severed forearm of Reptile, a shrunken head, an actual head, a soul lantern, a heart in a box, a gold bar, and a dragon medallion.

Treasure Chest: (Select Animation: The traveller looks around, seeing a chest behind him. He turns to open it, the screen slowing just before he can move to the front.) Designs include the various chest designs in the MK11 krypt, ones based on various MK Gods or realms, and even one called “Boon’s twitter collection.”

Skins:

Master of unlocking: His design from the MK11 Krypt.

Early days: A more cobbled together, ragged design. As if he were the traveller in the MKX krypt.

Richest in the realm: An ornamental, clearly expensive suit. Like this is what he’d wear if he ever chose to retire with his mountain of riches.

Hand me down: A stolen ninja garb, but ripped and slightly bloodied.

Universal Moves:

Upward spear: He shoot’s out Scorpion’s chained kunai, but in an upwards angle to hit the opponent jumping. If it connects, he pulls them down towards him before uppercutting them away. He shouts “GET DOWN HERE!” (Krushing blow if it counters an air attack: The spear goes deeper in and does extra damage.)

Soul blast: He takes out Ermac’s amulet and shoots out a rush of souls. Amplifying makes the souls launch the opponent into the air.

Spirit rush: Pulling out Kenshi’s sword and striking a pose with it summons a ghastly spirit rushes at the opponent, knocking them away on hit. Amplifying has the ghost possess the opponent to stun them.

Game of chance: A treasure chest appears on the field. If either the traveller or the opponent hits it, one of three things happen. (An observant player can tell which chest is which by the symbol on the face.)

Regains some health. (Heart)

Gain temporary armour. (Shield)

Gains a temporary damage boost. (Fist.)

There is also a chance that there will be nothing and he will sigh in disappointment. (Question mark.)

If the opponent opens it:

The traveller loses some health. (Heart.)

The traveller takes extra damage for a short time. (Shield)

The traveller gets a damage debuff. (Fist.)

There is a chance there will be nothing at which the traveller will laugh at the opponent. (Question mark)

Kustom Moves:

Vial of protection: He drinks a yellow vial, decreasing damage taken as long as it is active. You can tell if it’s active by the white glow.

Luck be a lady: The traveller gains an increased chance of getting a reward from a chest.

Sento’s guidance: The traveller pulls down the blindfold, turning the screen foggy and scrambling the opponent’s controls. During this time, any attacks involving Sento do extra damage and the spirits appear like they do in Kenshi’s possessed variation from MKX.

Amulet stance: The traveller moves his hand close to his belt, where he has three options.

Curse of Death: He pulls out Shinnok’s amulet, which can either be used to bind them with rings of crimson energy, or creating a skeletal hand to grab and squeeze them.

Blessing of Life: He pulls out Cetrion’s amulet which can either be used to heal him on amplify, or shoot out a blast of elemental energy.

Gift of Time: He pulls out Kronika’s amulet, which allows him to either stun the opponent in time, or rewind time for two bars.

Fatal Blow:

Endless inventory: Begins with the traveller slamming the head of the hammer ok the ground, making a shockwave. If it connects, he runs in, and attacks with a multitude of weapons. Li Mei’s sword, Tanya’s kobu jutsu, Hau Hao’s sun-moon blades, before he smashes the opponent upwards with the hammer. (SLO MO 1) the opponent is launched into the air and the traveller uses Sento to send a horde of spirits that look like Kenshi’s possessed variation to attack. (SLO MO 2) Finally, two spirits grab the opponent by the arms, and the opponent watches in horror as the traveller shoots a beam from Shinnok and Cetrion’s amulets that spears out through the opponent’s back. (SLO MO 3)

Fatalities:

Three in one: The traveller pulls out his hammer and smacks the opponent into the air, he then uses Ermac’s amulet to blast them even further up. Finally, he launches the spear at them in mid air, pulls them in, and tears them in half with his bare hands.

Swarm of torment: Using Sento, the traveller shoots the opponent into the air and summons a whirlwind of warrior spirits to swarm the opponent. The opponent is obscured by the swirling spirits, and you hear them scream in pain, before the traveller launches the spear and pulls them out, exposing their mutilated head as their body parts are seen in the background.

Friendship:

Money buys happiness: The screen snaps to black before it cuts to the traveller in a diving board. The traveller, dressed in a pair of swim trunks, puts on a pair of swim goggles and dives into a massive pile of gold koins like Scrooge Mcduck. He pops his head out, sighing in pleasure as he inspects a piece. He occasionally goes underneath before popping back up with a new piece.

Intro Animations:

Grave robbery: You see a body being pulled down by Scorpion’s spear, before it is revealed to be the traveller who tears the body in half. He wipes his hands together as he speaks.

Detour: You see the traveller looking down at a map before he looks up, rolls it away, and puts it away as he speaks.

CEAMR ODSE NTO EXITS: You see a storm of souls flying around the screen before they all recede into Ermac’s amulet, revealing the traveller.

Souled Out: A mummified monk corpse is seen, before its soul lantern is sucked out and it fades into dust.

Outro Animations:

Roadmap: He takes out a map with a list of places on it. The names “Dead woods shrine” and “Shang Tsung’s island” are crossed out. he closes the book and re-enacts the pose from the Konquer Mk11 menu pic.

Hoarder: The traveller laughs and takes out his bag pouch, emptying it. It fades to black with a giant pile of weapons, gear, riches, and a tiny top hat as the traveller chuckles sheepishly.

Finders Keepers: Opponent POV: The traveller walks to the opponent and says “I’ll take that!” Fade to black, cutting back to the traveller placing a unique object from the opponent on his belt. (Eg. A Lin Kuei medallion for Sub-Zero, Cassie’s Phone, Kollector’s lamp, One of D’vorah’s giant maggots, etc.

Back to business: The traveller looks to the left, says “Oh!” and opens a chest, the screen slowing on his awed expression as light shine out from the chest contents.

Intro Dialogue:

Vs Shao Kahn:

Traveller: Does your fortress have a treasury?

Shao Kahn: Nothing you will ever see.

Traveller: I’m quite good at getting into places unseen.

Shao Kahn: That hammer doesn’t belong to you.

Traveller: Hand it over, and I’ll show you how how it’s done.

Shao Kahn, laughing: Truly a fool…

Vs Shang Tsung:

Traveller: You want something?

Shang Tsung: Give me the amulet of Ermac.

Traveller: Come and take it.

Shang Tsung: Did you enjoy your time on my island?

Traveller: Yes, emptied the place dry.

Shang Tsung: There is still one thing you haven’t uncovered…

Vs Kollector:

Traveller: We are nothing alike.

Kollector: We are both earning our due.

Traveller: I’m the one earning his riches.

Kollector: You seem frustrated.

Traveller: Your prices were outrageous!

Kollector: Don’t act like you can’t afford it.

Ending:

“I’ve been all around the realms, and I’ve seen all sorts of powerful relics, taken a few myself.”

(Flashback to the traveller opening a chest on Shang’s island.)

“But compared to the hourglass? All of that’s just bronze pennies…”

(Flash to the now empowered Traveller looking at Kronika’s hourglass.)

“There’s a lot I can use this thing for. I can track down ancient ruins, make myself rich from the start, make myself a deity.”

(Shot of the traveller pondering what to use the hourglass for.)

“But, I’m nothing if not creative. And I’ve picked up a trick or two during my recent expedition to Shang Tsung’s old island.”

(Shot of the traveller taking out the amulet of Kronika and pointing it at the hourglass.)

“Through usage of Kronika’s amulet and those of her offspring, I’ve found a way to crystallise the sands of time. I am now in possession of the greatest treasure, fossilised alternate realities. Realities of realms thought lost.”

(Fade into the traveller hold a blue crystal that swirls with power)

“These crystals are priceless, beyond any imagination. And at a whim, I can restore them and see what treasures lie in the next timeline…”

(Shot of the traveller inspecting the crystals, of which he has a shelf full of.)

“But first… I’ve got to count my treasures…”

(Final shot is of the traveller proudly inspecting his treasure room, which contains a shelf of “timeline crystals” and references to MK lore.)

Round victory dialogue:

Generic:

“Finders keepers.”

“I’m not greedy, just good at my work.”

“I must say, never seen one like you.”

“Surprised a petty thief can fight?”

#krypt traveller #mortal kombat #mk11 koncepts

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knit-wear-it · 4 years

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AU: Training Day

Mood: In the Pantomime 17 (AO3), Ed is released from his bathtub prison so Jarley can send him off to do their bidding while they hide out at Lee’s. In an alternate universe, Harley & Ed spar together in Lee’s living room instead of having a serious conversation about Vicki Vale.

Rating: Crack / Lolz / Jarley Fluff / AU

AU: Training Day, A Harlequin-Tumblr Exclusive

Ed slept on the couch while Lee took the bed in her spare room, and Ed listened in the dark for the Joker and Harley to talk or fuck or do something, but it appeared they were just sleeping. Boring.

Then in the morning, Harley reappeared, not looking particularly refreshed, and wearing a sporty combination of the electric-blue leggings from the day before with a neon orange sports bra, showing off a very hot little body indeed. Ed pouted at her flat stomach, jealous because he had this little pooch that he just couldn't get rid of.

“Damn, girl,” Ed smirked, giving her his best impression of entitled toxic masculinity. “You’re—“

Harley slapped Ed across the face, making him gasp.

“Cut that shit out, Ed,” she snapped, mommy style. “This is fucking serious.”

Behind her, the Joker was watching as he smoked out the window, just looking… very unimpressed. He caught Harley’s eye, and something silent passed between them, and Ed knew they were both thinking they were wasting their time with him.

“Okay, okay,” he said in a rush. “I’m sorry, it’s the ADHD, I’ll concentrate, I promise. Tell me what to do.”

“I’ve seen footage of you fighting Black Canary and you’ve fought me,” Harley said grimly. “You’re strong, you’re fast, and you have some moves. Where did you learn to fight?”

“Where did I learn to fight?” Ed squinted at her, bewildered.

“If we’re going to work together we need to train together so we can fight together,” Harley explained, nearly making Ed swoon.

“I wrestled in high school,” he mused, trying to be serious. “Since then, mostly Soulcycle, pilates, and box fit.”

Harley’s eyes widened incredulously. “Box fit?”

“Yeah, like,” Ed bounced from one foot to the other, showing her his moves. “Jab, jab, cross! Uppercut! And... shimmie!” He swung his hips from side to side, bouncing on the spot as Harley stared at him like he’d sprouted a second head.

“You learned to box from an aerobics class?” she demanded.

“Well yeah,” Ed rolled his shoulders back, feeling judged. “Where did you learn to fight?”

“Twenty years of gymnastics, an underground Irish boxing club, and a teenage karate prodigey,” she snapped.

“Oh,” Ed’s eyes widened. “So you should really be better than you are, right?”

The Joker snorted and turned away to smoke out the window to avoid Harley’s lethal glare.

“Alright,” Harley sighed, looking around.

She sourced a roll of duct tape and a pair of throw pillows from the couch, then taped them to Ed’s hands, and with Lee’s help, taped a pair around hers too. It all looked very silly but Ed tried to remain serious, because it was obvious Harley was struggling. She looked tired, stressed out, sad, and a little bit hopeless though she was trying to keep it together like the good mommy she was.

Ed seriously doubted the Joker was the sort to give her a pep talk—maybe just multiple orgasms, which was objectively better.

“Okay,” Harley raised her pillow’d hands to cover her face as she spread her feet. “Show me what you’ve got.”

Ed imitated her posture and stance, then started prancing on the spot.

Harley dropped her hands, frowning.

“What the hell are you doing?” she demanded.

“Staying light on my feet,” Ed huffed, trying not to pout that she was being so serious.

“Fine,” she sighed, raising her arms again. “Whatever works for you.” She started shifting from one foot to the other, wholly focused. “Show me some of your moves.”

Ed jabbed and she blocked it easily. He tried a jab-punch-jab combination and she blocked each of them, remarkably strong for those slender little bird arms of hers. He tried a jab-jab-cross, right-hook, and Harley blocked all of it, looking bored.

She raised an unimpressed eyebrow and Ed narrowed his eyes, determined to impress her.

This time he advanced on her instead of just showing her combinations. She blocked, blocked, blocked, backing up as he got her on the backfoot. Ed felt like he was finally getting some momentum when she ducked, pivoted, and kicked him in the chest just like she did at the Hill fundraiser, hard enough to make him gasp and stagger back.

Harley lowered her leg, grinning as Ed rubbed his chest.

“Come on, Ed,” she taunted him, bouncing from one foot to the other, mocking him. She smirked and raised an eyebrow all sassy. “Show me what you got.”

Ed huffed again, narrowing his eyes in concentration before he attacked. She blocked and ducked, slipping right and left, moving too fast for Ed to hit her, and then after a few minutes of letting him chase her around the room, she kicked him in the chest again.

Ed scowled, even though really he was delighted to see her smirking, a light sheen of sweat on her chest as she gestured for him to attack her again. Behind her, the Joker lit a new cigarette, staring at her ass happily.

They were all like one big happy family. Even Lee was in the kitchen watching with an amused look on her face as she made them breakfast.

Then Harley attacked Ed before he had a chance to get his footing, forcing him to block and slip, imitating her with remarkable efficiency.

“Good,” she encouraged, when he swiped at her head, missing her. “Good, faster. Come on, Ed, faster!” She laughed like she was having fun, and Ed followed her directives. She went in to kick him in the chest again, and this time he grabbed her ankle with the intention of pulling her leg out from under her. But instead of falling on her ass, she threw herself into a back handspring, kicking him in the face as she bounced off her pillowed hands and landed gracefully on her feet, throwing her arms up in a V-like gymnastics pose.

“Owwwww,” Ed whined, his bottom lip jutting out as he rubbed his face.

“Is a kick to the face really enough to take you out?” Harley scoffed.

“Why doesn’t J have to train,” Ed pouted, flapping a hand at the Joker.

“Because he’s freakishly strong and fast, and he can shoot a flea off your arm from twenty feet away,” Harley rolled her eyes as Lee offered Ed some ice for his face.

Behind her, the Joker shrugged modestly, looking amused.

“Thank you, Lee,” Ed cooed, giving her puppy dog eyes that made her chuckle and shake her head. Then he turned back to Harley. “Well if J’s fighting with us why don’t you two sparr and let me watch?”

“We don’t do that,” Harley frowned.

“Ah c’mon, Puddin’,” the Joker drawled, flicking his cigarette out the window before he swayed up to her, raising a challenging eyebrow. “What’re you scared of, huh?”

“You’re injured,” Harley pointed out drily.

“Bet I can still take ya,” J smirked, making Harley scoff.

She hesitated as she thought it over, then shrugged helplessly and pulled off her pillow gloves.

“Fine,” she agreed lightly, raising her eyebrows as she squared off with him. “Don’t say I didn’t warn you.”

The Joker chuckled throatily and rolled those tasty lanky shoulders back while Harley planted her feet and held her fists in front of her face, all serious and professional.

“Show me what ya got,” the Joker taunted her, smirking.

Ed lowered himself onto the couch to watch, absolutely fascinated to see what would happen.

Harley jabbed and the Joker swatted her hand away, shooting her an unimpressed look. They did this twice more, and J sighed like he was bored, spurring Harley to try a fraction hader, forcing him to duck a right hook. He straightened up with an intrigued hum and she jabbed at his face, hard enough to hurt him this time.

But he caught her wrist, spun her around, and wrenched her arm behind her back at an angle that made her yelp as he forced her to double over, holding her there for a prolonged second before releasing her, looking smug.

“I guess—“ he started to say, but Harley launched herself at him again, actually punching him in the jaw with an uppercut that made him laugh as his head snapped back. She went to kick him in the gut but he caught her leg, and yanked her forward, spinning her around so his arm was around her neck, making her huff and pant as she tried to get free.

“Give up yet?” he asked her slyly.

“Nope,” Harley gasped.

She folded forward, throwing the Joker over her shoulder so he landed flat on his back, laughing weakly when Harley sat on his chest. She grabbed his arms and pinned them over his head.

“I win,” she smirked triumphantly.

The Joker flipped her onto her back so fast Ed gasped in delight. Then J sat on her stomach and pointed a sharp index finger at Harley’s forehead.

“Bang,” he smirked lazily.

Harley locked her knees around his hips and flipped them over again, but just as quickly the Joker rolled over once more, with far less effort than Harley had to exert, and this time he pinned her arms over her head.

“I win,” he declared.

“Really,” Harley widened her eyes. She had her leg between his thighs, poised to knee him in the balls. “Don’t make me do it, J” she let her bottom lip stick out in a pout.

The Joker hummed thoughtfully then bent down to whisper something in her ear, making her giggle and wrinkle her nose before she lowered her leg and he released her arms.

Ed looked at Lee, his heart swelling.

“They’re so cute,” he hissed, feeling privileged to see this private little moment between these dangerous people.

A/N: Alright, that’s all from me for a while. I may do a four-parter called “Symmetry” at some point next year. I officially have almost two scenes (out of like, 150 scenes) drafted for The Rabbit Hole.

Wishing you all a happy new year. Pop over to FFN or Ao3 to leave your review of the Pantomime if you haven’t already!

PS: Asks are open for a couple more days if anyone would like to submit, but i encourage you to do it non-anonymously - it makes me feel like you actually exist, lol.

Like it, note it, reblog it, show me some love <3

#the pantomime #the harlequin #jarley #harley quinn #the joker #the riddler #edward nygma #au #fluff #crack #lol

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gaillol-13 · 3 years

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"Alrighty, Ms. Shunn, you're hired."

"Really!" Edith was finally a part of the JH police department, her dream ever since, well...since the PP empire arrived at Piqua.

Chief Endenamys cleared his throat, and she took that as a queue to sit back down. Then he continued, "You are well aware that being a detective means lots of skills, and you checked all the boxes. So I'll give you the permission to work with any of the others of your choice.". Chief then put her papers down and gave Edith her badge, which she immediately snatched from his hands.

"Er- sorry," she apologized in a squeaky voice and gave a nervous smile, "I'm just excited.". Edith stuck the badge on her jacket, and saluted with pride. "I wont let you down, Chief."

"I doubt you will." Chief simply took a sip of his coffee, "Now, have you decided you you wanted to work with." He took a

"The best one you got!!!"

Ssphphtph

Chief Endenamys spat out his coffee in alarm, then looked at her in shock.

"A-...are you sure?"

Edith looked at Chief directly in the eye, her face burning with determination, "Positive."

Chief let out a sigh, "well all right, but be careful what-"

"WWWAAAAAAAAAAAHHHH!!!"

Their conversation was cut short by someone screaming in the lobby. When they arrived there, Edith's jaw dropped as she saw what was happening.

There was an obese middle aged man with rockets firing from his feet at high speed all over the place, he didn't wear anything except underwear and something that looked like a detective jacket-like grey cape with sleeves, he also had a black bowtie and a trilby hat.

But what was really bizarre about this man is that his legs looked metallic. Was he mechanical? That would explain why his feet had rockets in them. He was flying in all directions and it didn't seem like he could control where he was going.

"WwWwOoOoWwZzEeEeErRrSsS!!!!!"

Edith then noticed two kids that were frantically running after him. One had a tie and a flattop, the other had a t-shirt and a bad haircut.

"Hang on, uncle Cap!!!" George hollered at the man.

While Harold was starting to get exhausted from the running, "Help- *huff* -is on- *pant* -the way!!"

It was quite a scene, and Edith didn't know what to do. However, Chief Endenamys seemed unphased by this behavior, and he cleared his throat to speak.

"Use your parachute, CapGadget!"

CapGadget, huh? Weird name. Edith thought, also where was he going to get a para-

"OkAaAayy ChEeEeIiIiIfff!!! Go gO gAdGeT paraChUuUte!!"

Suddenly, the two ends of his cape started to attach to his lower back, creating a parachute...and then he crashed into a wall.

"UNCLE CAP!!" the boys ran to him, struggling to lift him up, "are you all right?"

CapGadget emerged out of the rubble, he was dizzy, but other than that he was in one piece.

"Never better, sidekicks. Wowzers, that was quite a ride!" He then dusted himself off and scooped up the boys, who were now clinging to him.

"Don't scare us like that! We're still used to your new appearance and lifestyle." George looked up at CapGadget, who smiled.

"T'aw, sorry bout that George." He gave the boy a small kiss on the forehead to reassure him, and then marched up the stairs, "Now let's get back to the office so we can work on that case".

Edith shook her head vigorously to brush off what just happened, then she turned to chief. Her smile eager.

"Sooooooo...who's the best here?"

Chief Endenamys pointed to the office where the man and the two boys went in, "That was him."

Edith's face faltered and it felt like her heart stopped, "Y-your joking, right?"

Chief shook his head, "nope, he's our best one."

Edith wanted to scream, instead she sharply inhales, then spoke in a hoarse voice. "Okaaaayyy...ssstilll gonna be great."

"Uncle Cap," George turned to his uncle and held up a file, "we got it."

CapGadget grabbed it then sat at his desk, "Alright, so what do we know about the mayor McChapper's missing boa constrictor "freckles"?"

Harold then jumped up onto the desk and opened up the file, "we know that Freckles likes to wrap around round objects. And he's gone missing last friday, the last place he was seen was in the Mayor's office in his giant glass habitat."

George squinted at the file, "Why did mayor McChapper name her boa "freckles"?". Harold simply shrugged.

*knock knock*

The mechanical man looked up at the door, "I'll get it!, go go gadget arm!"

His arm extended and opened the door. On the other side was Edith who tried her best to ignore the arm.

"Um, hello." She was unsure how to make a good first impression after what happened earlier, CapGadget on the other hand smiled and signaled her to come in. Then he leap over his desk and landed right in front of her.

"Why hello!!" CapGadget greeted Edith happily as he retracted his arm that opened the door and shook her hand.

"I am CapGadget, Inspector CapGadget Underpants. At your service!", CapGadget tipped his hat then let go of Edith's hand.

Edith cocked her head with a confused look on her face, "Why do they call you that?"

"Well, first I'm a detective, and I wear underwear. And "CapGadget" is short for "Captain Gadget"." He said matter-of-factly, "I have multiple gadgets in my body that help me with my cases!"

Edith stared at him for a moment, she could see that limbs seemed screwed to CapGadget's torso, and there were lines on his fingertips. His eyes glowed a dim green color. He definitely seems note-worthy.

His voice interrupted her thoughts, "But enough about me, what are you doing here?"

"Oh, I'm detective Edith Shunn, I'm here to work with you."

CapGadget's expression became uncertain, "Sorry to disappoint you, but I work alone."

"HEY!!" The boys both shouted and look up from the file giving their uncle highly offended glares, causing Capgadget to chuckle nervously.

"Uh, hehe. You guys are exceptions of course!" He rubbed the back of his head, sweating.

"We better be!" George crossed his arms, "We do most of the work!"

"You bring children on your missions?" Edith asked with a concerned expression.

"Their not just children Ms.Shunn, their my nephews. George Beard, and Harold Hutchins."

"No relation." Harold added as he and his best friend went back to inspecting the file.

Edith's eyes narrowed and her voice got more serious, "That's even worse."

CapGadget chose to not take that personally, so he sat back at his desk and got back on topic, "Well either way, you cant work with me."

Edith started to get annoyed, she stomped toward Capgadget, her blue eyes piercing his own.

"Listen inspector, I've worked to hard for this job to be rejected by a human pocket knife. The chief himself said I had the skills for this, so the least you can do is let me demonstrate." She leaned over him, their faces only millimetres away from eachother. "Because I'm really...really, in the mood to demonstrate."

"Wowzers..." Capgadget swallowed hard, both impressed and intimidated by her demanding voice. He stood up and walked to an empty part of the room, then cleared his throat.

"Ahem, proceed."

Edith smirked at the cybernetic detective, "You suuurrre?"

Capgadget nodded, "Yup, just tell me when your about to-"

WAM!!!

THWACK!!!

Before he could finish, Edith jump kicked him in the the gut and delivered a powerful uppercut. Sending him flying.

The boys winched as Capgadget crashed into the wall causing chunks of it to fall on him. He popped up from the wall remains and collapsed face first on the hard floor.

"Aaaoooooowwww...." Capgadget groaned as he struggled to stand, almost losing his balance.

"Soooo..." Edith grinned while helping him up.

Capgadget regained his senses and struck a heroic pose, "YOU'RE HIRED!!"

#captain underpants #TAEOICU AU #cap #edith the lunch lady #george #harold #CapGadget #writing #vil Endenamys

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ramblingsreport · 3 years

Text

It’s finally time for our main event of the evening as Kira Perez will face Kimber Lee in Bare Knuckles Boxing Match

This fight is scheduled for 12 rounds of fighting.

And as usual, I along with Cali Danger join lead announcer Chuck cage side.

“Ladies! How great it is to have you join me once again!” Chuck says, hugging us & pulling out our chairs.

“As always, Chuck, the pleasure is all ours.” I say, smoothing my skirt & having a seat.

“Sabrina, what are your thoughts, now that it’s finally time for tonight’s main event?”

“I think we’re in for a classic match, these two women have been sitting on pins & needles waiting for this match all night. They’re itching to put a show on tonight, I say let’s begin the festivities and give these people what they came to see.” I say.

“I couldn’t agree more, Sabrina. Let’s throw it back to Katie Kearney who is standing by with the favorite, Kira Perez. Katie?” Chuck says.

“Thank you, Chuck! Kira, it’s finally time for the main event, how are you feeling?”

“I feel great, Katie! This is match is a fan voted match, and I must admit, it’s one I’ve wanted as well, I say, let’s go out there, & gives these people a show.” Kira says, walking away.

“Thank you, Kira! Chuck, back to you!” Katie says.

Kira Perez makes her way to the ring, she’s accompanied by her corner crew. Kira is wearing a light pink sports bra & black spandex shorts.

Kira gets inspected ringside, receives her mouthpiece, enters the ring & stands in her corner.

“Thank you, Katie! Sabrina, your thoughts on Kira Perez?” Chuck says.

“Chuck, Kira Perez is an up & coming performer in the WEC & this has the makings have a great match, I can’t wait to call this match.” I say.

“Thank you, Sabrina! Cali? Your thoughts?”

“Chuck, I agree with Sabrina! Kira will be an unstoppabe force in this match.” Cali says.

“Thank you, both of you! Let’s go back to Katie Kearney who is standing by with Kimber Lee.”

“Thank you, Chuck! Kimber, your thoughts on facing Kira Perez?”

“Katie, Kira is a good fighter, & this’ll be a good fight! But I’m confident I’ll come out victorious!” Kimber says, blowing a kiss to Katie & walking away.

“Thank you, Kimber! Chuck, back to you!” Katie says.

Kimber Lee makes her way to the ring, she’s accompanied by her corner crew, she’s wearing a black sports bra & pink spandex shorts.

Kimber gets inspected ringside, she receives her mouthpiece, enters the ring & stnads in her corner.

“Thank you, Katie! Sabrina, your thoughts on Kimber Lee?”

“Chuck, Kimber is an exciting competitor, and she has a real test ahead of her in Kira Perez. This’ll be a great fight.” I say.

“Cali? Your thoughts?” Chuck asks.

“I agree with Sabrina, this is a huge main event!”

“Okay! With all of that being said, let’s throw it up to ring announcer Cathy Kelley, it’s time for our main event!”

“Ladies & gentlemen! The following contest is our MAIN EVENT OF THE EVENING! It is scheduled for 12-rounds in the WEC Bare Knuckles Boxing division!

“Introduccing first: from Miami, Florida…please welcome…KIRA PEREZ!”

Kira smiles & waves to the crowd.

“Her opponent: from New Jersey…please welcome…KIMBER LEE!”

Kimber also smiles & waves to the crowd.

Both women meet in the center of the ring as the referee gives final instructions.

Both women bump fists and go back to their corners.

The bell sounds & both women come out circling.

Kira lands a series of three right jabs, causing Kimber to back up a couple of steps.

Kimber answers back a couple of jabs followed by a right hook which just misses.

This causes Kira to clinch up with Kimber.

Kira now utilizes dirty boxing tactics, lands a headbutt followed by a hard elbow shot that sends Kimber down to the mat.

The referee begins counting & Kimber is up by the count of 4.

The referee checks & the fight continues.

Both women continue circling.

Both women again bump fists as they continue circling.

Kira lands a right hook to Kimber’s body, sending Kira to one knee, then Kira lands a right hook to the side of Kimber’s head, knocking Kimber facedown to the mat.

The referee starts counting, and Kimber barely answers the count of ten.

Just then the hotn sounds, ending round 1.

Kimber struggles to find her corner.

“Awesome 1st round! Sabrina , your thoughts?” Chuck asks.

“Chuck, when I announced this match has the main event of this card, I didn’t expect such a lopsided fight, Kira has really proved she is superior. I personally can’t wait for round 2!” I say.

“Well said! Cali? Your thoughts?” Chuck again asks.

“Chuck, I have to agree with Sabrina. This is a lopsided fight, and I see Kira ending this fight in this 2nd round.” Cali says.

“Okay, thank you to the both of you.”

Meanwhile, in Kira’s corner:

“Great job that round, Kira! You can end this fight this coming round! Just keep working the body, and remember, just because you knock her down doesn’t mean you have to stop hitting her! Also the fight ends at Sabrina’s discretion, you could possibly knock her out more than once, and the match won’t end until Sabrina says so! Go out there & knock her out!”

In Kimber’s corner:

“You’re still in this fight, Kimber! Just protect yourself, and she’s obviously going to work your body. Just do better this round!”

Both women are on their feet for round 2.

The bell rings, & both women come out circling.

Kimber lands a couple of right jabs to Kira’s face, followed by a right hook to Kira’s body, backing Kira up of steps.

Quickly, Kimber has Kira backed against rhe ropes. Kimber starts landing bomb after bomb. Kimber eventually knocks Kira through the rops & out of the ring.

Kira’s corner crew quickly rushes over ther & begins trying to revive Kira.

After about 20 seconds, Kira is back on her feet & in the ring, & the fight continues.

The round ends with Kimber landing a series of rights & lefts. Kimber even makes sure to land a couple of shots after the bell, which is completely legal.

This time it’s Kira who needs help finding her corner.

“Sabrina? What else can happen in this fight? How long can this fight go on like this?” Chuck asks.

“Chuck, this fight will go on as long as I deem it necessary, until I feel the WEC universe has gotten their money’s worth. These boxing & MMA fights end at my discretion, why do you think I’m always at ring & cage side for these fights?”

“Okay, but that sounds dangerous. Cali? Your thoughts?”

“I think this fight still has a long way to go, Chuck!” Cali says.

In Kira’s corner:

“Kira, you can’t let her back her against the ropes, she’s simply too powerful. You need to work the body, like I told you earlier, work the body and you’ll win this fight this round!”

In Kimber’s corner:

“Good job that round, Kimber! Keep backing her against the ropes & you’ll be able to score a knockout easily!”

Both women are on their feet for round 3.

The bell rings & both women come out circling.

Kira once again lands a right hook to Kimber’s body.

Kimber quickly clinches up with Kira.

Kira lands a hard elbow shot, followed by another headbutt, and it opens a gash above Kimber’s right eye.

This causes enough separation for Kira to land a huge uppercut, sending Kimber back to the mat.

Kira stands over Kimber and lands several uncontested right hands to Kimber’s face.

Kira finally backs off & allows the referee to count, & Kimber fails to answer the count of 10.

The referee looks at me and I signal that the match is over.

Your winner, Kira Perez.

Kira stands over Kimber & poses for several minutes.

5 notes · View notes

kob131 · 4 years

Text

https://spectralscathath.tumblr.com/post/190909103203/fight-analysis-rwby-vs-ace-ops

So let’s start with the set up for the fight, specifically, these quotes from Marrow and Harriet.

Marrow: We’re not actually going to slug this out, are we?

Harriet: We’re not doing anything. They decide what happens next.

This puts a heavy emphasis on the fact that team RWBY starts this fight. They are the aggressors in this situation, which then makes it both incredibly cowardly and utterly manipulative when, seconds into the Harriet vs Ruby fight,

Hold it hold it hold it.

How come you don’t mention the music in the background or the alternative to Team RWBY here? The foreboding music indicating a fight is inevitable and the alternative is Team RWBY being arrested while leaving people to do, something fundamentally against their morals?

That line is more of a confrontation Team RWBY will be offensive instead of being ‘the aggressors’ (AKA negative connotation).

... This is gonna be intensely biased in the Ace Ops favor isn’t it?

Ruby: Come on, Harriet! We’re playing right into Salem’s hands! You know we need to be working together!

A quick aside, Ruby’s voice is pitched up with this line, compared to her earlier bragging that the Ace Ops aren’t the best anymore. Her cocky smirk is replaced by a wide-eyed, fearful look, and I’d like to point out that this only happened after Harriet landed the first blow of the fight, kicking Ruby into the elevator doors. This is entirely faked, purely because Ruby’s suddenly realised that Harriet poses a threat and is trying to put on her cute ‘I’m just an innocent kid don’t hurt me’ act, while also trying to heap all the blame of this fight onto Harriet.

Her tone was also pitched up when she was talking into her school. That’s the result of raising her voice. To say nothing of how her look is PLEADING in nature, not FEARFUL.

Harriet doesn’t take any of this crap, thank the good lord, and decides to put her focus on pummelling the ever-loving aura out of Ruby.

... I really should just ignore you huh?

And boy, does she manage it. I went through and counted every single blow landed in each fight, so let’s start the blow-by-blow, literally. I’ll focus on each specific match-up one at a time, to properly break it down.

Yeah huh, sure. And Tyrian would be unbiased moderator in a debate between Ozpin and Salem right?

I’ll just keep the Ace Ops fight open in another tab so I can peer into reality.

Also, just so we’re all on the same page, I am a trained martial artist, having studied Karate (specifically Zen Do Kai), and boxing. Let’s keep this in mind as we analyse this fight.

Also keep the rest of what they’ve said in mind as well, as in ‘I have already shown an intense bias for the Ace Ops’ so you really shouldn’t be listen to.

Hits Taken Harriet: 2 Ruby: 7-8

Wanna know what isn’t counted? The amount of time or the number of times Harriet and Ruby used their semblances. Wanna know long/many times Ruby used her semblance? Five times. Two times for extended distances, once for a quick defensive deflect and two for split second dodges and maneuvers. The longest being 7 seconds.

Harriet? Fuck, I don’t even know how to measure her because EVERY MOVE SHE MAKES is using her Semblance. She uses it CONSTANTLY. So naturally, her aura would drain faster.

Does the OP consider this?

Now, if we take into account aura levels, we are aware that Harriet’s are noticeably lowered, as seen from her fight with the Megoliath. She and Ruby are both using their semblances a lot, hard to say who’s using theirs more. Possibly Harriet, but Ruby isn’t far behind.

Fuck no, they keep it VAGUE so you don’t see how much Harriet uses her Semblance.

I shouldn’t even consider the rest of this post considering how FLAGRENT this shit is, but we’ll move on.

Hit 2: Harriet kicks Ruby in the chest with both feet. (Some of these screenshots are hilarious but I’m doing it as categorical proof of the hits)

Yeah, see how Harriet’s feet are ON Crescent Rose?

That’s a block. So -1 hit.

Hit 3: The next one is a little hard to count, as it’s the shot where Harriet blitzes by Ruby. The first hit is hard to tell if it connects or not, while the second hit most definitely does, meanwhile Ruby blocks the third strike. The first of these is the only hit that is ambiguous.

Yeah, it looks that way in screenshots...in animation Ruby doesn’t react correctly, meaning she wasn’t hit AT ALL. So -1 as well here too.

Hit 5: Harriet restrains Ruby’s hands behind her back, enough to cause Ruby pain. However, that is an unfortunate side-effect of having arms pinned in that manner, so I’m not going to call it excessive. After all,

Harriet: It’s not excessive if it’s necessary.

Quick fuck you: This can be said of Team RWBY fighting the Ace Ops, necessary to defeat them and try and save as much as Mantle as possible.

It’d be reductionist but that’s OP’s speciality at this point.

Hit 6: Ruby escapes Harriet’s pin, ties the bolas around Harriet, before yanking Harriet backwards into Ruby’s uppercut to the spine, which appears to go near the area of Harriet’s nape and the back of her head. (I’ll come back to this)

Yeah, that’s a pretty serious hit. Most people would suffer serious pain from that. OP even tries pointing this out as a failing of RUBY.

Yeah. That one. I study in Australia, which, had a certain event happen that leads me to be somewhat biased against punches specifically to the nape/back of head, you know, that place where your spine meets your skull? From Wikipedia, just for a basic rundown: ‘During 2013 and 2014, significant media attention was paid to two violent killings involving one-hit punches in Australia. Noting that 91 people had died in Australia in the previous fourteen years from brain trauma as a result of being so hit, a media campaign was launched to refer to them as coward punches.’

91 people. Yep.

So, if I sound like I disrespect Ruby for the single hit she landed, while Harriet seems to get a pass for punching Ruby in the back and the throw to the ground, I would like to point out first of all, Harriet only started going for attacks to the head and neck area after she had been restrained, in which case she is trying to put Ruby down hard and fast. Secondly, Ruby not only pulled Harriet backwards into the uppercut, she’s fucking grinning.

How triumphant. None of the Ace Ops show this level of glee at landing hits, I’m just saying. Also, calling back to Harriet’s line about it not being excessive if it’s necessary, Harriet was at that point restrained, only showing she is capable of fighting despite that after being punched. While hitting Harriet may not have been excessive, you would also think that perhaps a leg sweep, or a kick to the back of the knee, would be enough to stop her, instead of a King Hit, specifically one that Harriet could not have even tried to block due to how her arms are tied.

Rant about my own personal biases towards coward punches is over let’s continue the actual analysis now that I’ve copped to it

P.S. No admission of your self evident bias for the Ace Ops? yeah, not gonna buy this.

Hit 7: Harriet headbutts Ruby in the face. This one doesn’t have an impact SFX like a lot of hits do, but the way Ruby reels back makes it clear Harriet connected the blow

Notice how OP doesn’t have an image here?

Yeah, -1 again.

Hit 9: Harriet runs into Weiss’s ice wall, her aura is shattered, and she is knocked unconscious.

What isn’t shown: Harriet running head first USING HER SEMBLANCE (which makes her faster than Ruby in close quarters) into a thick ice wall.

For demonstration: run as fast you can, leaning into it, at a wall of ice. Actually don’t because people have DIED from that too. And we don’t have super quick powers in INCREASE the damage.

But how, the pray tell fuck, does Ruby apparently have enough aura to tank at least 7 hits, most of which are kicks, from a combat-trained runner, and come out smiling? Tyrian gave her a few scratches and one kick to the stomach and that had her aura flickering. Now, yes, Tyrian is on a level all his own that only Qrow and maybe Clover can match, but also; are you fucking kidding me?

Difference: Ruby used her semblance a fuckton, Tyrian is probably stronger than Harriet considering he was equal to QROW and could block bullets with his tail FROM SOUND ALONE.

Ruby barely used her semblance in comparison to Harriet spamming the thing while the OP says she had LESS Aura.

All while taking FOUR hits, maybe 5 since OP manipulated shit.

Suddenly doesn’t seem so implausible huh?

Ruby’s a speed fighter/sniper, a DPS main, and I’m supposed to believe she’s all of a sudden more of a tank then Yang?

Because fictional characters in a world without definitive roles unlike an RPG fit neatly into all roles and not like certain circumstances gave Ruby more durability that you CONVIENENTLY ignored.

So… yeah. Take that bit as you will.

Take it as an indication you’re biased as fuck? Okay.

Anyway. Shall we move onto the next round?

You’ve sunk your creditability with that last fight and I REALLY shouldn’t listen anymore out of sheer offense at the lack of principles here, but fine,

Blake and Yang vs Elm and Vine

Hits Taken Blake: 4 Yang: 4 Vine: 3 Elm: 4

Ah huh, what is said about Semblances?

Okay, so. Elm and Vine use their semblances liberally enough, while Blake and Yang barely use their semblances outside of finishing moves. I’ll grant them all that.

...After all that with Harriet and Ruby, you don’t even BOTHER discussing the use of semblances?....

You know, they don’t even really ANALYZE the fight. Wanna know what they say beyond stating hits (NOT a good indicator of whose winning)?

And aside from the suicide bomber attack, this fight is solid enough, animation-wise at least. Elm proves herself to be an absolute goddamn beast of a woman whom I love, but… it’s a little sad that the only hits Blake makes are team attacks. Once again, even worse then it was with Bees v Adam, Yang carries the fight while Blake is near-useless, aside from a few token team attacks.

I do wish Elm was more of a tank, though. It’s what she deserves.

Honestly, this feels so INSULTING. What, you didn’t have problems so you skipped the fight effectively? Analysis doesn’t mean ‘bitching about what I don’t like’, I learned NOTHING from this.

All I can say is-

It’s not even necessary? Anyone remember this handy lil trick Blake has?

Look at that! It’s an exploding clone that doesn’t rely on someone else to pull the pin on the bomb!

What the actual fuck was the point of this move, other then to make me worry about Blake’s mental health? Who approved this? Who said ‘what’s the ultimate show of trust? Having the former member of a terrorist group put bombs on herself that someone else detonates! Brilliant!’

This is utterly bizarre.

Just sayin’.

Blake’s clones are BLATANT when infused with Dust. Vine wouldn’t have fallen for it.

Weiss vs Marrow

Hm. Hmmm. Well. Weiss got her first solo fight win. Unfortunately,

Harriet: Marrow! Cut the crap, will you?

Marrow: I’m trying to arrest her, not kill her, Hare!

Her opponent was holding back. Looks like Weiss’s special power is still ‘losing every fight she’s in with an opponent who’s not self-sabotaging’.

Marrow: I know you Schnees are used to getting what you want. But it's time to let this one go!

Yeah, don’t buy it.

Hits taken Weiss: 0 Marrow: 1

Yep.

Weiss takes no hits, at all, while Marrow blocks and dodges every single one of Weiss’s hits aside from the last. I’m serious. So I can’t go by hits for this one, I need to go by attacks.

So you say basically nothing about the actual fight but the dodgefest you say more? Really?

Hm. Yes. Hmmm. There’s some rather, shall we say, unfortunate implications here, since this looks, to me, rather more like an execution than anything else. As pointed out to me by a friend, when I showed them these screenshots, Marrow’s posture in the last is a very submissive pose. Head down, tail drooped, arm slack, reliant on external support (his boomerang), and kneeling. Also, what is with Ruby and Weiss and going for the back of the head?

He JUST got done dealing with the Knight and had to use his Semblance to stop it. After dodging and blocking a fuckton of hits. After all of the shit with the Grimm before. For someone trying to make the Ace Ops look as innocent as possible, why would you ignore how tired he must be?

Also that isn’t an execution pose. You have to be aiming for the NECK for an execution, not the HEAD.

There’s also the unusually heavy focus on Marrow’s tail getting burnt, and this tone-deaf line, if we’re going to point out all the ‘faunus racism’ implications that show up.

Marrow: I know you Schnees are used to getting what you want, but it’s time to let this one go.

Weiss: This is my home, and I’m not giving it up without a fight.

...

You mean like when Kefla was launching her barrage of lazers at Ultra Instinct Omen Goku and they focused on his hair just barely getting grazed? It’s to emphasize how close the attack was.

Weiss, honey, you’re from Atlas. Mantle is a separate city. Twin cities, at the most, but you’re Atlesian. Also, this came right the heck out of nowhere. Absolutely nowhere in Weiss’s arc this season were we getting anything about her giving a damn about Mantle beyond ‘I kill grimm there’.

... HER ENTIRE ARC IS ABOUT CARING ABOUT OTHER PEOPLE!

And, just because unfortunate and hopefully accidental implications are the order of the day on Weiss vs Marrow, she’s saying this to the faunus that’s managed to get racism humansplained to him by the same woman who calls him ‘Wags’ as a funny nickname.

Sorry, I don’t speak wet farts.

Seriously, how the fuck is this a racism thing when Weiss is assumed to be someone who always gets her way, even in THIS Volume.

Weiss: Don't you think "tyranny's" a little dramatic?

Forest turns around to respond and looks surprised upon realizing who had just spoken.

Forest: Easy to say for a Schnee heiress, living comfortably up in Atlas.

Weiss: (sighing sadly) Not anymore.

Marrow deserves more respect than this, guys. I don’t even want to get into how bizarre it is that the final shot of his defeat puts the focus on his shackles, putting them even more in the foreground then Marrow himself. That’s just weird.

To emphasize he has them. Dumb I know but considering this post’s bullshit, you guys kind of earned it.

To conclude:

Ruby should have gotten her aura broken three hits in, sorry not sorry. Ruby is also a cold-cocking manipulative lil brat who has lost even the dregs of my respect for her. What a shame.

Which was complete horseshit beyond even Adel Aka or Dudeblade.

Harriet and Elm’s defeats seemed to have been framed in ways that were meant to be a little humiliating, with Harriet making dumb faces as she passes out and Elm landing in an awkward position. I disapprove of this. I would prefer if they were defeated with dignity.

It’s called humor.

Blake continues to be a useless damsel in distress in Actually Important Fights, while Yang is Angry All The Time and does all the heavy lifting.

That had fuck all to do with what you said, and as if being evasive and wasting enemy resources and acting as support for one of the BIGGEST HEAVY HITTERS IN THE SERIES is bad?

Weiss v Marrow has some weird implications that make me uncomfortable.

Which says more about you than anything else.

Credit where credit’s due: the voice acting, sound design, and the fight animation was great. Do I think the Ace Ops should have won? I would have found it more interesting, to be sure. Can I live with team RWBY winning? I can, but I could have done without the smugness.

Smugness you inserted.

Is there anything I would have changed? Bees vs Elm and Vine was fine, but I’d have either made it Ruby v Marrow and Weiss v Harriet (for a speedster vs Schnee fight, and a Lil Rd vs the Wolf fight), or would have let Harriet break Ruby’s aura.

Instead of personal stakes, bland ideas! Wonderful!

Also: War should and hopefully will be an Ace Ops’ song, not a team RWBY song. If anyone got betrayed here, the Ace Ops were the ones who put their trust into four liars who hid vital information and had the gall to act offended when they got told what a dick move said information-withholding was.

*insert equally shitty take about Ace Ops with bias in favor of Team RWBY here.*

Anyway, thanks for reading, I’d love to hear other thoughts on the matter. Ta, luvs.

Which is why the reblogs do nothing but regurgitate what you said while I’m blocked.

Speaking of reblogs....

https://jadekitty777.tumblr.com/post/190942492544/fight-analysis-rwby-vs-ace-ops

A lovely read dear! I’d also like to add, just because I was curious:

During the Qrow &Tyrian Vs Clover fight, I decided to do my best to count the amount of hits Clover and Qrow took.

I’m going to start with Qrow - he took about 5. One toss and 4 punches, mostly to the face (jeez Clover, I thought you liked his pretty face lol). Keep in mind Qrow is also primarily more a close-range fighter and took front lead in the Tyrian fight in the episode prior AND just went through a plane crash. The same plane crash that knocked Robyn unconscious - despite the fact she was only back-up during the other fight and hadn’t been down in Mantle during the evacuation efforts up until the end to lure Tyrian out. The point is, his aura should be hurting, but it doesn’t even flicker.

For Clover? It added up to be about 11-12 - one of which was a point blank shotgun blast to the chest, 3-4 hits from Tyrian’s bullets in the back, and one more sword slice from Harbinger to his back. I highlight those ones because they’d be the hardest to tank. The rest were various kicks and punches, most to his face and midsection.

(Also really Qrow,you should not be surprised Clover’s aura broke. You guys were killing him).

But the point I want to make is… Clover was down in Mantle just like the rest of the ops fighting for who knows how long before they went for Tyrian - considering they were coming back only slightly behind team RWBY and the others, we can surmise only maybe an hour or so they diverted to deal with our little scorpion. It’s also worth mentioning that ALL of our team members have been up an entire night and these fights in c12 happened closer to dawn, considering the sunrise at the episode’s end. They are all equally exhausted.

So to circle back around: Clover got struck with double to triple the hits his own team got - a full team of Atlas specialists. It feels like Clover is the only one who seems to be treated like he’s on Qrow’s level, wherein they really ALL should be at his level. Instead, it’s like the rest of the Ops had to be significantly nerfed to be beaten by Team RWBY.

If you want me to believe Team RWBY can beat them, then you also have to make me believe they can beat Qrow. And yeah, I don’t.

...

Clover never used his Semblance.

Qrow hits harder than ANYONE.

He was also attacked by Tyrian.

And Qrow was in a PLANE CRASH.

Fucking hell, this is one of the worst analysises I’ve read. Yes, including RWDE slock.

5 notes · View notes

drpsyche · 4 years

Text

The New War

It is the year 1998. The Cold War has finally heated up like an attractive ghost pepper (a damn good looking pepper too, a solid 8/10). The Soviets have stolen valuable brain digitizing technology from the Disney Corporation and now a battle rages in East Germany as American forces have invaded. Uncle Sam, the American Uberman leads the charge and has personally torn his way through commies like a hearty lawnmower through an American lawn. The invasion is largely a success, but the USSR is not finished…

Uncle Sam flexed his muscles, destroying the sleeves of his red white and blue tailcoat. He dodged a trio of Soviet Solders and shoulder-checked a tank, knocking it right through a garrison.

“Four Score and Forward!” Sam shouted, charging through the ruins to grapple with the stunned soldiers inside.

One ran at Sam with a bayonet, but Uncle Sam outmaneuvered and head-butted him. The headbutt is fatal and the soldier dies like a mouse hunted by an American Eagle. As Uncle Sam stared out at the defeated barracks, he heard a familiar voice:

“Sam!”

Uncle Sam turned to face the owner of that deep powerful tone. He is a large blond man in soviet flag colored boxing shorts and gloves.

“Drago!” Sam spat.

“One shall stand,” Ivan Drago boomed. “One shall fall.”

“Why throw away your life so recklessly?” Sam asked, advancing on Drago.

“That is a question you should ask yourself,” Drago replied.

Uncle Sam scowled and charged at Drago, catching him in a flying tackle. They crashed onto the street, Drago forcing Sam off with a knee to the stomach. They righted themselves and Drago immediately laid into Sam with a one two, punching him in the face twice. He followed up with a successful jab and then a right hook but Sam blocked it and landed a powerful body blow as a counterattack. With Drago pushed back, Sam hit him with a shoulder check and then a roundhouse.

“America has never lost!” he boasted. “And never will!”

Drago spat out the blood in his mouth, “You said this to the Vietnamese as well?”

That dig struck at the core of Uncle Sam’s American Pride like the Canadians striking on American soil during the war of 1812. His anger allowed him to land a powerful right hook… onto Drago’s block. Drago countered with an uppercut, knocking Uncle Sam to the ground. Though Sam’s glorious red, white, and blue top stayed on his head.

“I derive my strength from the will of the people!” Drago boasted as Sam rolled on ground. “Their hearts and minds joined in glorious Community! Our unity courses through my muscles!”

Sam staggered to his feet, “Unity, huh? Will of the people, united behind your fists, eh? The deliberate starvations and ethnic cleansings, are they an aspect of your ‘unity’?”

Now it was Drago’s time to be outraged, “I will not be lectured about genocide from an American.”

He charged at Sam then, murder in his eyes. Uncle Sam took a page from the great American movie, The Karate Kid, and swept the leg. A powerful, painful blow landed on Drago’s knee. However, Ivan Drago was not deterred, and grabbed hold of Uncle Sam. He lifted the American into the air and hurled him at a pile of rubble, smashing him through it.

“Finish him off, Drago!” one Soviet Soldier called out.

Ivan Drago nodded and limped toward a discarded Kalashnikov rifle, another point of pride for Glorious Russia. Uncle Sam had gotten to his knees and looked up to see Drago aiming the rifle at him. The specter of death flashed in front of his eyes for a moment, but then his gaze was drawn elsewhere. The pile of rubble he was thrown through showed him a boon: a discarded Desert Eagle pistol (the pride of Glorious America).

“Wait!” Uncle Sam shouted, holding up a hand in surrender. “Grant me mercy, Ivan Drago, I beg you!”

“You, who outsource your morality to the free market, demand mercy?” Drago asked, annoyed that Sam would crawl towards him. “I thought you were made of sterner stuff.”

“Oh no you don’t Uncle Sam!” shouted the Soviet Soldier, who was able to spy the discarded pistol.

The shout distracted Drago long enough for Sam to surge forward and grab the pistol, immediately firing it at Drago’s injured knee. Drago yelled out in pain as he was kneecapped and Sam fired another shot into the bicep of the arm holding the Kalashnikov. Drago was forced to drop his weapon and staggered back, Uncle Sam standing over him and aiming the Desert Eagle at him.

“I could have waited an eternity for this,” Uncle Sam said. “It’s over, Ivan.”

“Nefur!”

Ivan Drago and Uncle Sam looked up at the voice. Descending from the sky was a lithe figure clad in a distinctly French outfit. She struck the ground; twin circles of smashed earth, beneath her feet. She looked up at Uncle Sam, the sun shone on her silver body. Uncle Sam stared at this new opponent; she was a robot woman, clad in a maid outfit with cat ears peeking out of her braided black hair.

“The Soviet Union’s new Vanyanguard!” she shouted, striking a magical girl pose. “Against Impawsible odds, I have risen again! Mew’ll nefur take down the USSR, beclaws Lenin has returned to finish the fight.”

“What in the name of apple pie and ball park hot dogs is that?” Uncle Sam asked, leveling his Desert Eagle at the robot catgirl.

“This… this is our victory,” Drago said. “The Disney brain technology we stole allowed us to reconstruct the greatest minds of our country! They are uploaded into vessels that are the cutting edge of Soviet Technology.”

“Robot girls with bad puns?” Uncle Sam asked.

“Eh, it was Gorbechav’s idea,” Drago said with a shrug.

“The defeat of catpitalist pigs is meowsic to my ears!” Vladimew Lenin said.

Uncle Sam emptied his gun at the robot but the bullets were as useless as the British’s demand for taxation. Her metal skin, folded a thousand times in the roaring fires of state sponsored smithing, were impervious to the fragile fickle of the free-market. Vladimew activated the jet engines in her feet and flew at Sam, drawing a hammer and sickle from her sleeves.

She swung the hammer and Sam caught it, crushing the weapon easily, but Vladimew struck at her true target with her sickle. The red, white, and blue top hat upon Sam’s head was sliced in twain. The symbol of freedom, capitalism, and statehood was broken. Sam could feel the fight draining from his limbs like the respect of the American people for the presidency when Watergate happened.

Uncle Sam fell to his knees, defeated.

“Hiss-tory will see this as a pawsitively vital moment,” Vladimew said. “Mew-Mew Marxism will reign over the world and Western Society will face Catastrophe!”

“America will never surrender to the likes of you!” Uncle Sam said. “So long as there’s gas in our cars, burgers on our grills, and the love of Lady Liberty in our hearts!”

“Your mrrroxie is commendable,” Vladimew said with a smug smirk.

“Your conquest of America will fail. Just like your handling of Chernobyl,” Sam said.

With those words Uncle Sam disappeared in a flash of patriotic light, returning to America. Drago and Vladimew departed to their base to treat Ivan’s injuries. America’s disastrous invasion of East Germany would be the start of a new era of warfare, one far stupider than any previous ones. Vladimew’s success allowed the creation of other robot maids: Nikittyta Khrushchev, CATherine the Great, and Meowseph Stalin. Their original attempt at invading America was repulsed by a mechanized Statue of Liberty and now the space station, Sputnik VI, is being converted into a transforming robot maid in order to counter her. The war wages on and the world becomes all the dumber for it.

#my writing

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memecucker · 6 years

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big wild hog energy

Wild Hogs From Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia Wild Hogs Wild-hogs-poster-750.jpg Theaterical poster Directed by Walt Becker Produced by Kristin Burr Todd Lieberman Brian Robbins Amy Sayres Sharla Sumpter Michael Tollin Written by Brad Copeland Starring Tim Allen John Travolta Martin Lawrence William H. Macy Ray Liotta Marisa Tomei Music by Teddy Castellucci Cinematography Robbie Greenberg Edited by Christopher Greenbury Production company Touchstone Pictures Tollin/Robbins Productions Distributed by Buena Vista Pictures Release date March 2, 2007 Running time 100 minutes Country United States Language English Budget $60 million Box office $253.6 million[1] Wild Hogs is a 2007 American biker comedy road film directed by Walt Becker and starring Tim Allen, John Travolta, Martin Lawrence and William H. Macy. It was released nationwide in the United States and Canada on March 2, 2007. Contents [hide] 1 Plot 2 Cast 3 Production 4 Motorcycles 5 Reception 5.1 Critical response 5.2 Box office 5.3 Lawsuit 6 DVD release 7 Cancelled sequel 8 Awards and nominations 9 References 10 External links Plot[edit] Doug Madsen (Tim Allen), Woody Stevens (John Travolta), Bobby Davis (Martin Lawrence), and Dudley Frank (William H. Macy) are four middle-aged suburban men living in a Cincinnati area suburb who find themselves frustrated with the pace of daily life and lack of adventure. Doug is a dentist who has trouble relating to his son Billy (Dominic Janes), Dudley is a single clumsy computer programmer who is afraid to talk to women. Bobby is a henpecked plumber whose wife has made him return to work after having taken a year off to unsuccessfully write a book, and Woody is a rich lawyer married to a supermodel. They find escape from their daily routines on weekends by riding motorcycles together posing as a biker gang called the "Wild Hogs". One day, when Woody finds out his wife is divorcing him and leaving him bankrupt, he and his friends go on a road trip on their bikes to California. After encountering several misadventures, they end up at a local bar, where they meet a much larger biker gang called the Del Fuegos, headed by Jack Blade (Ray Liotta). Jack calls the Wild Hogs "posers" and has his gang take Dudley's bike after a bogus deal to exchange Dudley's bike for a new bike that is in fact old and derelict, forcing the men to leave with Dudley in a sidecar attached to Woody's bike. Outraged at their actions, Woody returns to the Del Fuegos bar and retrieves Dudley's bike, cuts off their bikes' fuel supplies in the process and fabricates a story to the other Wild Hogs of how he "negotiated" with them to return the bike. When the Del Fuegos hear the Wild Hogs riding back past the bar, they attempt to pursue them, only for the bikes to stall. Jack inadvertently drops his lit cigarette onto the ground, igniting the fuel leaking from the bikes which then causes the bar to explode. Woody, after witnessing the explosion from afar, convinces the others to keep riding. Eventually, the Wild Hogs run out of gas and end up in Madrid, New Mexico, where they stumble into a diner and help themselves to water and beer without first paying for the beer. As a result, the townspeople first mistake them for Del Fuegos. When the Wild Hogs explain their actions, they learn that the Del Fuegos have been terrorizing the town frequently, while the local police force are unable to do anything to protect the town. Although Woody is still antsy about the Del Fuegos, the others convince him to stay in the town overnight. During their stay in the town, Dudley falls in love with Maggie (Marisa Tomei), the diner's owner. While out searching for the Wild Hogs, Jack's closest biker members Red & Murdock spot the group and report their location to Jack. Jack tells the pair not to hurt the Wild Hogs until he gets there, leaving them unable to fight back when Bobby spots and confronts the pair by splashing beer and spraying ketchup and mustard on their clothes before finally laying two uppercuts to them. The Wild Hogs are hailed as heroes amongst the town's residents and celebrate well into the night with the townspeople. The next day, Woody persuades the others that they must leave, but their departure is ruined when the Del Fuegos arrive. Jack threatens to attack the town unless the Wild Hogs pay for the damage done to their bar. Woody admits to the Wild Hogs what he really did to get Dudley's bike back as well as the real reason for the trip, upsetting the others. Jack and the rest of the Del Fuegos take over Maggie's diner, but when he threatens to burn it, Dudley confronts them and is captured and tied from a rope against a tree. The others attempt to rescue Dudley but fail. They then decide to fight the Del Fuego gang letting Jack, Red, Murdock and a member trained in martial arts battle the group in a 4 on 4 fight but the Wild Hogs are repeatedly beaten down. The townspeople band together to battle the Del Fuegos, but just as Jack threatens to take on the rest of the town, Damien Blade (Peter Fonda), Jack's father and the founder of the Del Fuegos, arrives and stops the fight. Damien lectures Jack for letting four "posers" hold off an entire biker gang, questioning aloud just which side was the "posers". He also adds that the bar was merely an insurance scam and therefore was glad that the Wild Hogs destroyed it. Damien tells the Del Fuegos to leave town and ride the open road until they remember what riding is really about, mentioning as he leaves that Jack "takes after his mother." He then acknowledges the Wild Hogs by telling them his motto: "Ride hard, or go home." Doug and Bobby's wives arrive, and Doug reconciles with his son. Bobby's wife orders him to return with her, but he refuses and convinces her to let him finish the ride. The Wild Hogs leave and arrive in California, where everyone except for Dudley crashes into a surfboard while he laughs. During the credits, it is revealed that the Wild Hogs called Extreme Makeover: Home Edition to give the Del Fuegos a new bar. The Del Fuegos react in joy at their new bar while the Wild Hogs watch the event on TV. Cast[edit] Tim Allen as Doug Madsen John Travolta as Woody Stevens Martin Lawrence as Bobby Davis William H. Macy as Dudley Frank Ray Liotta as Jack Blade Marisa Tomei as Maggie Kevin Durand as Red M. C. Gainey as Murdock Tichina Arnold as Karen Davis Stephen Tobolowsky as Sheriff Charley Jason Sklar as Deputy Earl Dooble Randy Sklar as Deputy Buck Dooble John C. McGinley as Highway Patrolman Peter Fonda as Damien Blade Production[edit] This section does not cite any sources. Please help improve this section by adding citations to reliable sources. Unsourced material may be challenged and removed. (March 2014) (Learn how and when to remove this template message) Travolta and Macy had previously worked together in the 1998 drama, A Civil Action where they originally came up with the idea for Wild Hogs. Liotta and Durand had previously appeared together in the 2006 action thriller Smokin' Aces. Lawrence and McGinley appeared in the 1997 comedy Nothing to Lose. Lawrence and Arnold had previously worked together on the television series Martin; many fans of the series found their pairing in this film humorous, as well as ironic, as in the series, their characters hated each other, while in the film they were husband and wife.[citation needed] Though the film takes place in various places throughout the U.S., the entire movie was actually filmed in New Mexico (except the beach on the West Coast at the end).[citation needed] The opening scenes that supposedly take place in Cincinnati were actually filmed in and around Albuquerque; the final scenes said to depict Madrid were actually shot there.[citation needed] Motorcycles[edit] Harley-Davidson provided the motorcycles for the making of this film.[citation needed] XL1200C Sportster Custom for Dudley. FXSTS Springer Softail for Bobby. Black Fatboy with a chrome front wheel for Doug. Screamin' Eagle Fatboy for Woody. Many of the motorcycles utilized by the Del Fuego gang were customized choppers. The motorcycle used by Jack featured the logo for Orange County Choppers, run by Paul Teutul, Sr. with design work by Paul Teutul, Jr.. Both Teutuls have cameo appearances at the beginning of the film.[citation needed] Tim Allen, a noted automotive designer and hobbyist, gave input to the design of his motorcycle. Of the bikes used in the film by the four main characters, his is the most customized model.[citation needed] Reception[edit] Critical response[edit] Wild Hogs opened on March 2, 2007 to mostly negative reviews. The film holds an average rating of 3.8/10 on Rotten Tomatoes, with a 14% approval rating based on 141 reviews. The site's consensus says "Wild Hogs is a dreadful combination of fish-out-of-water jokes, slapstick, and lazy stereotypes".[2] Ty Burr of The Boston Globe compared the film's merits to its titular motorcycles, believing it to be "a bumptious weekend ride... the engine could use tuning and the plugs are shot, but it gets you most of the way there." Although writing a negative review, Burr offered praise for the film's final act, believing it "takes a satisfying turn" and that, with the exception of Allen, each of the film's primary cast members "earned his designated chuckle." He also favorably compared the film to RV, another comedy film focusing on a road trip.[3] Box office[edit] Despite negative reviews, the film grossed $39.7 million on its opening weekend, ranking #1 in box office sales and nearly tripling the debut of fellow opener Zodiac.[4] The film performed well throughout its entire run, falling just 30.5% in its second weekend[5] and ultimately grossing $168.2 million domestically and $253.6 million worldwide,[1] becoming Travolta's first film since The General's Daughter in 1999 to gross over $100 million domestically.[citation needed] Lawsuit[edit] In March 2007, the Hells Angels filed suit against Walt Disney Motion Pictures Group alleging that the film used both the name and distinctive logo of the Hells Angels Motorcycle Corporation without permission.[6] That suit resulted in voluntary dismissal.[7] DVD release[edit] Wild Hogs was released on standard DVD and Blu-ray Disc on August 14, 2007.[citation needed] Cancelled sequel[edit] Because of the movie's strong box office performance, Disney announced that a sequel, Wild Hogs 2: Bachelor Ride, would be released in 2010. However, after Disney's next comedy starring John Travolta, Old Dogs (which co-starred Robin Williams) was a box office failure, Disney canceled both Wild Hogs 2: Bachelor Ride and Wedding Banned, a comedy that was to star Williams and Anna Faris.[8] Awards and nominations[edit] People's Choice Awards 2008 Nominated- Favorite Movie Comedy[citation needed] References[edit] ^ Jump up to: a b http://www.boxofficemojo.com/movies/?id=wildhogs.htm Jump up ^ "Wild Hogs". Rotten Tomatoes. Retrieved February 22, 2016. Jump up ^ Wild Hogs Movie Review – Wild Hogs Movie Trailer – The Boston Globe Jump up ^ Weekend Box Office Results for March 2–4, 2007 Jump up ^ Wild Hogs (2007) – Weekend Box Office Results Jump up ^ 'Litigation against movie release' (March 8, 2006) and they rule., HAMC vs Walt Disney Jump up ^ 'Hells Angels file suit against Alexander McQueen' (October 27, 2010) [1] Jump up ^ McKittrick, Christopher (2 March 2016). "Why Disney Put the Brakes on 'Wild Hogs 2'". ThoughtCo.com. Retrieved 8 May 2017. External links[edit] Wikiquote has quotations related to: Wild Hogs Official website Wild Hogs on Internet Movie Database Wild Hogs at AllMovie Wild Hogs at Rotten Tomatoes Wild Hogs at Metacritic Wild Hogs at Box Office Mojo The Times Film Review: Wild Hogs [hide] v t e Films directed by Walt Becker Buying the Cow (2000) Van Wilder (2002) Wild Hogs (2007) Old Dogs (2009) Alvin and the Chipmunks: The Road Chip (2015) Categories: 2007 filmsEnglish-language filmsAmerican films2000s comedy filmsAmerican comedy filmsAmerican buddy filmsFilms directed by Walt BeckerFilms set in New MexicoFilms shot in New MexicoMidlife crisis filmsMotorcycling films2000s road moviesAmerican road moviesTouchstone Pictures filmsOutlaw biker films Navigation menu Not logged inTalkContributionsCreate accountLog inArticleTalkReadEditView historySearch Search Wikipedia Go Main page Contents Featured content Current events Random article Donate to Wikipedia Wikipedia store Interaction Help About Wikipedia Community portal Recent changes Contact page Tools What links here Related changes Upload file Special pages Permanent link Page information Wikidata item Cite this page Print/export Create a book Download as PDF Printable version In other projects Wikiquote Languages العربية Čeština Dansk Deutsch Español فارسی Français Galego Italiano Magyar Bahasa Melayu Nederlands 日本語 Norsk bokmål Polski Português Русский Suomi Svenska Türkçe Українська Edit links This page was last edited on 21 June 2017, at 17:12. Text is available under the Creative Commons Attribution-ShareAlike License; additional terms may apply. By using this site, you agree to the Terms of Use and Privacy Policy. Wikipedia® is a registered trademark of the Wikimedia Foundation, Inc., a non-profit organization. Privacy policyAbout WikipediaDisclaimersContact WikipediaDevelopersCookie statementMobile viewWikimedia Foundation Powered by MediaWiki

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cbwalive · 5 years

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CBWA BOGOTA

Event: Drugwars 3 Pay-per-view Date: Saturday, April 13, 2019 Location: Bogota, Colombia Capacity: 90,099

CBWA North American Championship Hot Stuff Eddie Gilbert vs Z-Man Tom Zenk

The first man to put his opponent through a table wins. They brawl out to ringside early on in this one, and Eddie Gilbert slams Z-Man ribs-first into the fan barricade. Z-Man fights back and drops Eddie Gilbert on the floor as the crowd chants “Prick, Prick, Prick.”

Back in the ring, Eddie Gilbert comes back and puts the boots to Z-Man on the mat. Z-Man rolls outside and Eddie Gilbert slams him into the ring apron. Z-Man is selling a rib injury. Eddie Gilbert tries to suplex Z-Man on the ramp, but Z-Man turns it around and reverses it into a suplex of his own.

Z-Man takes Eddie Gilbert up the ramp and throws him into one of the screens, then he goes over to the announce table on the stage. Z-Man goes for a running powerslam, but Eddie Gilbert escapes and throws Z-Man off the stage. They fight back to the ring, and Z-Man looks for a running powerslam into a table set up in the corner, but Eddie Gilbert escapes. Eddie Gilbert knocks Z-Man outside and throws him into the ring steps face-first.

Eddie Gilbert climbs up to the apron and looks for a flying move, but Z-Man knocks him out of mid-air with the wooden ring steps. Z-Man hits him with the ring steps a couple more times before taking him back in the ring. Z-Man gets the crowd going but Steve Ryder’s music hits. Ryder comes out on the stage, surrounded by women and he begins to pose. Z-Man gets distracted and Eddie Gilbert nails him from behind and hits the running powerslam on Z-Man through the table in the corner for the win.

Winner & still North American Champion: Hot Stuff Eddie Gilbert

CBWA South America Championship - Triple Threat Buford Pusser, Ole Anderson, Amish Dale

Zombie Robert Blake is at ringside, in Buford Pusser’s corner. The crowd chants for Amish Dale as the match starts. The opening bell sounds and Anderson and Amish Dale see to form a temporary alliance to dump Buford Pusser outside early on. Anderson and Amish Dale then go at it, and Anderson dumps Amish Dale outside.

Anderson hits a flying cannonball on Amish Dale on the floor, then he hits a cannonball on Buford Puisser up against the fan barricade. Back in the ring, Pusser drops Anderson and then kicks Amish Dale off the apron down to the fan barricade. Pusser connects with kicks and chops on Anderson in the corner now. Amish Dale gets back in the apron and Pusser beats on him until Amish Dale dodges a shot and hits a facebuster.

Amish Dale follows up with chops to the chest, but Buford Pusser fights back with a lariat. All three men fight into the corner now, and Amish Dale crotches Pusser on the top rope, then he hits a reverse hurricanrana on Anderson. All 307 pounds of Amish Dale goes up top with Ole Anderson and hits a standing Colombian fly on him. Pusser hits the Stunner on Amish Dale for a two count. Buford Pusser and Ole Anderson brawl now and Anderson hits a Lariat on him for a two count. Wow, Ole almost knocked the head off of him.

Amish Dale drops Ole now as Pusser rolls out to the apron. Amish Dale goes up top and hits a 450 splash on Pusser from the top rope to the apron. Holy crap, Amish Dale can fly for a big man. Amish Dale pins but Zombie Robert Blake pulls Pusser out for the save. Zombie Robert Blake gets on the apron, and Amish Dale and Ole Anderson both hit dropkicks on him, and then a double dropkick, and Zombie Blake falls out to ringside.

Amish Dale then leaps from the apron with a hurrcianrana on Zombie Robert Blake. Ole Anderson then goes flying with a suicide dive on Zombie Robert Blake. Buford Pusser then takes out Ole, and he rolls Ole back in the ring. Amish Dale ends up hitting a flying tornado DDT on Buford Pusser from the apron down to the ringside floor.

Ole grabs Amish Dale and powerbombs him into the apron. Before Ole can get back in the ring, Zombie Robert Blake, back up on his feet, hits a spinning kick on Ole, then throws him over the barricade. Zombie Robert Blake throws Pusser back in the ring and he covers Amish Dale for a two count.

Buford Pusser shouts at Amish Dale that he doesn’t deserve to be here, and they trade strikes. Amish Dale springboards off the middle rope, but Buford Pusser hits a flying knee to the face in mid-air for the three count.

Winner & NEW South American Champion, Buford Pusser

Necro Butcher vs Bogota Miz in a deathmatch

*THE FOLLOWING CONTAINS GRAPHIC DESCRIPTIONS*

The canvas was swapped out for the deathmatch.

Necro Butcher comes to the ring first, pushing a box full of goodies. Miz comes out with his hands wrapped. Necro rolls about 50 light tubes into the ring. Miz has a bag of tools and he throws them into the ring. The bell rings.

Necro Butcher and Miz both bumped into the tubes.

They then began hitting each other with tubes as the fans went nuts.

Both men hammered a plate into each other’s heads and exchanged headbutts. Both men came up bleeding. Miz was bleeding like crazy.

Necro Butcher broke a tube over Miz’s arm. The ring is also littered with nails. Necro Butcher put a tube in Miz’s mouth and hit a leg sweep and the tube broke.

Miz superkicked a pile of tubes up against Necro Butcher’s chest for a near fall. He grabbed more tubes, but Necro Butcher wiped him out with a shotgun dropkick and the tubes exploded.

Miz hit a big Bogota Bomb, but Necro Butcher kicked out. Both men fired up and broke tubes over their own heads. Necro Butcher grabbed a stapler and rather then use it on Miz, he started stapling his face. This is disgusting.

They traded blows and Miz caught Necro Butcher with a big lariat for a two count. Miz got an Ice Pick. They fought over it and Necro Butcher hit Miz in the arm with it. Miz has a huge gash across his arm. Miz grabbed a jack hammer but he couldn’t hold it due to the gash and pain from his arm.

Necro Butcher grabbed more tubes and set them up along the bottom two ropes. There’s a row covering one side of the ring. He grabbed Miz and started DDT’ing him threw the lights.

Necro Butcher then hit a Bogota suplex through the table. Miz is out of his element and it shows. Miz reaches out on the mat and grabbed a pizza cutter. As Necro Butcher walked over, Miz low blowed him and ran the Pizza Cutter across his forehead - The blood - oh the blood. Butcher is down holding his forehead and blood is gushing.

Miz set up some tubes on Necro’s chest and nailed him with a running knee. He set up some tubes on top of Miz and hit a swanton for a near fall. Miz kicks out. The referee is questioning whether to let this go on as both men are losing large amounts of blood. Miz waves off the referee and grabs Necro Butcher and drives him head first into a framed window. There’s a large shard of glass sticking out of Necro’s back. Miz then lays out Necro in the middle of the ring and goes to the outside. Miz hops back in with a board of knives. Sharp knives. He put it up against Necro’s chest and nailed him with a dropkick. It appears that Necro Butcher got impaled with at least 3 knives.

Miz drags Butcher out to the center of the ring and hops outside again.

What the hell is that? Miz has a lawnmower. He slides it under the bottom rope.

The crowd is going crazy. Little movement from Necro from the middle of the ring. The referee is checking on Necro and says he wants to go on.

Miz fires up the lawnmower and runs over Necro Butcher in the middle of the ring. There goes a hand, a foot just flew into the crowd. OMG!

The referee calls for the bell. It’s over, Miz is the winner.

WINNER: Bogota Miz

King of the Andes Championship Match

I'Am Vacated vs. Porkchop Gas

They traded blows. I'Am Vacated caught him with a suplex. They rammed into each other like bulls. I'Am Vacated leapt over Porkchop Gas and caught him with a dropkick. Porkchop Gas responded with a pounce that sent I'Am Vacated flying. I'Am Vacated sent Porkchop Gas to the floor.

Porkchop Gas tripped I'Am Vacated off the apron and speared him at ringside. I'Am Vacated avoided a cannonball in the corner.

Delayed pumphandle suplex from I'Am Vacated. Porkchop Gas went bug-eyed at being held in the air like a baby.

Porkchop Gas with a high knee. Superkick from I'Am Vacated, knockout punch from Porkchop Gas, lariat from I'Am Vacated.

I'Am Vacated continued right through Porkchop Gas and the ropes to the floor. Both men were down.

They traded right hands in the ring. Jumping uppercut from I'Am Vacated. Headbutt from Porkchop Gas and a throw. Bogota suplex from I'Am Vacated with a two-count. Inside out clothesline from Porkchop Gas. Colombian

destroyer from Porkchop Gas for a close near-fall.

Porkchop Irish whips I’Am Vacated and sets up a dropkick, but I’Am vacated grabs the ropes instead of rebounding & as soon as Porkchop hits the mat, I’Am Vacated puts on the Figure 4.

Porkchop taps and the referee calls for the bell.

Winner & still King of the Andes Champion, I’Am Vacated

AFTER THE MATCH:

@BTTsharecropper comes into the ring to celebrate with I’Am Vacated. He raises his hand, and out of nowhere, @BTTsharecropper sucker punches I’Am vacated in the gut and puts the boots on him. @BTTsharecropper grabs the microphone and cuts a promo about how it’s B.S. that I’Am Vacated ended up with the King of the Andes belt at The Great Bogota Bash. @BTTsharecropper says the second that decision was announced, he realized he was no friend, just an opportunistic parasite. It’s grated on his nerves more with each passing day since, and he’s decided it’s time somebody taught I’Am vacated a lesson & he demands I’Am Vacated face him at the next PPV at the end of the month.

CBWA Women’s World Championship Match TAMMY vs Bobbie Kate

The CBWA Women’s Title belt is on the line in this one. TAMMY starts off with kicks to Bobbie Kate’s bad knee. Bobbie Kate fights back with right hands, and TAMMY goes back to Bobbie Kate’s bad knee. Bobbie Kate starts to fight back again, but TAMMY once again goes for the bad leg. TAMMY takes her down and puts her in a Boston crab.

TAMMY continues to work over Bobbie Kate’s bad knee. Bobbie Kate tries to fight back, but TAMMY shuts her down and hits a suplex. TAMMY takes Bobbie Kate out to ringside and slams her into the fan barricade, then takes her back in the ring. TAMMY stomps on Bobbie Kate then goes to the top rope.

TAMMY reaches the top, then Bobbie Kate shoves her down to the ringside floor and TAMMY crashes into the barricade. TAMMY gets back in the ring to go at it with Bobbie Kate. TAMMY catches Bobbie Kate in the Figure Four, but then Judy Martina runs down to the ring.

Martina knees Tammy in the face and the referee calls for the bell. Bobbie Kate is furious and she starts yelling in Judy’s face. Judy slaps Bobbie Kate across the face and they both go at it in the ring. Security jumps in to break it up. TAMMY is now up and she’s trying to get a Judy. It’s mayhem in Bogota.

Winner via DQ: TAMMY

CBWA World Tag Team Championship - Triple Threat High Flyers, Chill Bill & Greg Gagne vs Bogota Ox & Sin Caravan vs The Bogota Heat

Gagne & Chill Bill vs Bogota Heat vs Ox and Sin Caravan

The CBWA World Tag Team Titles are on the line in this one. The Bogota Heat, TC and OJ are making their CBWA debut. The High Flyers get dumped outside early on, and Oj Simpson and Bogota Ox will start this one off.

Theodore Calvins tags himself in and suplexes Bogota Ox down, then hits him with an elbow to the face. T.C. connects with chops and stomps in the corner, then OJ tags in for the double team. Bogota Ox fights back and Sin Caravan gets the hot tag.

Sin Caravan cleans house and kicks down everyone in his path. Sin Caravan beats on Chill Bill now in the ring and hits a moonsault on him. OJ runs in and Sin Caravan kicks him down, then TC comes back with a spinebuster on Sin Caravan. Bogota Ox tags in as Gagne hits a suplex on TC. Chill Bill comes flying in with a splash off the top on Gagne to break up the pin.

Sin Caravan then hits a shooting star press on Gagne for a two count. Chill Bill tags in and goes at it with Sin Caravan now in the corner. This leads to Sin Caravan hitting a Frankensteiner on Chill Bill off the top all the way down onto Bogota Ox on the ringisde floor.

Back in the ring, Gagne and TC trade pin attempts. This leads to The Bogota Heat hitting the HEAT BOMB on Gagne for the three count to win the Tag Titles.

Winners & still new CBWA Tag Team Champions: Bogota Heat

Zombie Robert Blake vs. The White Knight

NO DQ MATCH

Both men start the match with heavy brawling, and The White Knight lands a heavy right hand on Zombie Robert Blake, sending Zombie Robert Blake to the mat. The ref starts a ten count, giving Zombie Robert Blake a ten count to recover from a knockdown.

Once the ref stopped his count the brawling began once again. There was some intense but awkward grappling between the two, then Zombie Robert Blake hit a nice kick to the chest from the corner. The White Knight hit a bit suplex on Zombie Robert Blake for one count. The White Knight started to pound away at Zombie Robert Blake.

The White Knight hit a big flying elbow then attempted to apply a rear-naked choke but Zombie Robert Blake was able to fight out of it. Zombie Robert Blake hyperextended The White Knight’s arm using the top rope for leverage. Zombie Robert Blake grabbed a door from under the ring. He placed the table in the corner and placed The White Knight in front of the table.

Zombie Robert Blake then attempted to hit a running elbow on The White Knight but The White Knight moved and Zombie Robert Blake went through the door. The White Knight attempted to body slam Zombie Robert Blake but Zombie Robert Blake was able to escape, and tangle The White Knight up in the ropes in the process.

Zombie Robert Blake goes to the top rope, but The White Knight meets Zombie Robert Blake on the top and The White Knight attempts an avalanche superplex but Zombie Robert Blake counters and hits the Tree of Woe. Zombie Robert Blake goes for a cover but only gets a two.

Zombie Robert Blake applied the dragon sleeper, but The White Knight was able to counter into a rear-naked choke. Zombie Robert Blake ended up passing out.

WINNER: The White Knight

CBWA DrugWars 3 - Battle Royal

Some familiar music hits and the crowd is stunned.

Bogota Mayor, Fake Stan Lane is the first entrant in this thing?

The second man out is…ok, f- this.

It’s Arabian Giant. Arabian Giant!? Fake Stan Lane and Arabian Giant tie up and do a bit of trash talking that the mics pick up. They exchange immovable object shoulder blocks and scream at one another.

As they push each other around, the next man is out. It’s the AWO’s own…Arn Anderson? As Arn Anderson enters the ring, Fake Stan Lane has Arabian Giant nearly up and over the top. Arabian Giant survives.

Arn Anderson lands a few punches, but is ultimately smacked around and beat up. The next man out is Marty Jannetty, with his manager Sherry.

Marty Jannetty catches Arn Anderson rushing him at the ropes, ducks, and Arn Anderson is gone. Arabian Giant grabs Marty Jannetty’s hair as the crowd erupts for the next man. Oh thank God! Shawn Michaels is here to save us! He teams up with Marty Jannetty against Fake Stan Lane & Arabian Giant. They both get shoved to the mat before Arabian Giant turns on Lane, only to get clotheslined out of there.

The next man is out. It’s Bogota Buff. He’s back in the CBWA! He’s in great shape for his age and hits a nice little spin kick on Shawn Michaels. He hits a Drug Lord suplex on Shawn Michaels, with a bridge! We get another entrant as Bogota Buff pulls the hair of Shawn Michaels. It’s Captain Honky!

He and Bogota Buff trade kicks before Shawn Michaels breaks it up. Captain Honky gets a Crucifix pin on Bogota Buff and Buff is gone. ANOTHER entrant. It’s Bogota Sheik. He hits double-axe handles on everyone, ducks and Fake Stan Lane clothesline, and spears him. Then he does the Hacksaw “Hoooo!” and clothesline everyone, though Fake Stan Lane doesn’t initially drop. New entrant, Macho Man! He hits the funky weapon and then everyone tries to pin Bogota Sheik. They hit tandem splashes and get a dogpile pin.

Shawn Michaels drops Macho Man and slaps on a surfboard. While he’s holding Macho Man in the air, Captain Honky jumps on top of Shawn Michaels for two. As the new Hart Foundation’s Jeff Hart is announced as the next man out, Shawn Michaels and Macho Man roll up Captain Honky and he’s gone. Jeff Hart is wearing his Hart Air Conditioning and HVAC gear. He doubles down on the legit gimmick, taking a swig of water on his way to the ring, turning to the crowd, and does the spit-pose.

Jeff Hart stomps away at Fake Stan Lane while Macho Man suplexes Marty Jannetty. Macho Man rubs his rear in Marty Jannetty’s face as – holy s- its Lupe! This is my pick to win after watching that brilliant match he had with Sin Caravan on the network special last week.

Lupe enters and locks Macho Man in an armbar but it’s broken up by Jeff Hart. Jeff Hart goes for the Pedigree, but Lupe reverses for a backdrop. The next man out is Road Warrior Hawk. Lupe hits a running knee to Jeff Hart in the corner as the camera cuts to Hawk making his way to the ring. When the camera cuts back, Jeff Hart is at the bottom of a scrum and is eliminated via pinfall. Hawk looks great!

Another entrant comes out as Lupe kicks Macho Man in the ass. It’s Chinese Giant. Wow, he’s tall! Lupe is sent to the corner, and after a running clothesline by Chinese Giant, Hawk hits a nice suplex followed by a running clothesline by Chinese Giant.

They pile up on Lupe for the pin fall elimination.

Oh my 1990’s! It’s Paul Bear! He actually looks pretty close to how he did 20 years ago with just a beer or two extra of weight in the gut. He boots Macho Man in the stomach and spikes him into the mat with a big powerbomb. Yeah, that’s a three.

The rest of the competitors team up to take on Fake Stan Lane. They take turns chopping, punching, and dropping elbows, but Fake Stan Lane is strong so Fake Stan Lane obliterates them all.

First goes Chinese Giant from a big clothesline. Then Paul Bear, dumped over the top rope.

There goes Hawk, clotheslined over the top.

Marty Jannetty lands a few forearms, but is clocked really really REALLY god damn hard by an Fake Stan Lane forearm.

Marty Jannetty shows some heart, fighting back to receive a buckle bomb for three.

So much for heart.

Winner: Fake Stan Lane Lane wins $10 millions dollars and a CBWA title shot!

STEEL CAGE MATCH

Bogota Lex w/ Juanita Jesus Maria Conchita vs Yakuza ZZ

An “Bogota Lex” chant was firmly established just before Bogota Lex made his entrance. Lex came to the ring with his girlfriend Juanita. Yakuza ZZ was next out to a round of boos. He was led to the ring by his security team.

Both men, former friends and tag team partners haven’t been in a CBWA ring in 7 months.

They were both inducted into the CBWA Hall of Fame last night.

The referee, who was preemptively wearing rubber gloves, called for the bell to start the match.

Yakuza ZZ struck first with a hard right hand, and followed up with four right jabs and an elbow to Bogota Lex’ forehead. Yakuza ZZ head butted Bogota Lex to the mat before attempting to drive Bogota Lex’ face into the cage, but Bogota Lex blocked and returned fire with punches of his own. Bogota Lex now led Yakuza ZZ face-first toward the cage, but Yakuza ZZ blocked, missed a chop, allowing Bogota Lex to land a chop cleanly across Yakuza ZZ’s chest. Yakuza ZZ responded with a bigger chop to Bogota Lex’ chest, sending him to the canvas.

Bogota Lex knocked Yakuza ZZ to the mat for the first time with a dropkick, and drove him into the corner with repeated shoulder thrusts. Bogota Lex landed punches and kicks to Yakuza ZZ in the middle of the ring before setting up for a suplex, but his opponent was too large and powerful – Yakuza ZZ lifted Bogota Lex into the air and face planted him to the mat. Yakuza ZZ then lifted Bogota Lex to his feet and whipped him face-first into the steel cage two times, and followed up with a splash against Bogota Lex who was pinned between the ropes and cage.

Bogota Lex chopped and head butted his way out of the corner, but Yakuza ZZ landed a monstrous reverse elbow that turned Bogota Lex inside out. Yakuza ZZ approached the cage door for the first time, thinking of escape, but Bogota Lex charged from afar. Yakuza ZZ caught Bogota Lex and planted him with a Bogota slam, then landed a hefty knee drop before covering for a two-count. Yakuza ZZ dragged Bogota Lex back to the edge of the ring and ground his face into the cage. We are visually reminded that it is 2019, as Bogota Lex has lost zero pints of blood from his forehead, although his selling might tell us otherwise.

Yakuza ZZ whipped Bogota Lex into the corner, splashed him with a reverse elbow, then landed a big enzuigiri that knocked Bogota Lex to the mat. Yakuza ZZ covered for a two-count. Yakuza ZZ got to his feet and again fired Bogota Lex face-first into the cage. Yakuza ZZ lined up to splash Bogota Lex again against the cage, but this time Bogota Lex dropped and pulled down the top rope, causing Yakuza ZZ to collide with the cage for the first time. Yakuza ZZ was stunned, allowing Bogota Lex to land multiple punches and kicks, including the spinning back fist and a sharp clothesline, dropping Yakuza ZZ to one knee. Bogota Lex bounced off the ropes and leveled Yakuza ZZ with a forearm.

Yakuza ZZ leaned against a corner to stay upright as Bogota Lex stalked. Bogota Lex charged and landed another powerful forearm to Yakuza ZZ’s forehead. Yakuza ZZ, stunned, wound up in the middle of the ring, allowing Bogota Lex to mount the turnbuckle and then came off with an elbow to Yakuza ZZ’s head. Lex then delivered a sweet DDT and covered, but Yakuza ZZ kicked out at two.

Bogota Lex began climbing the corner of the cage, but Yakuza ZZ grabbed him by the belt. Bogota Lex reverse kicked Yakuza ZZ to create separation, sending Yakuza ZZ to the middle of the ring. Bogota Lex changed his plan of escape to a plan of attack – he turned around on the top turn buckle, and leaped toward Yakuza ZZ for a flying forearm but Yakuza ZZ caught him in a bear hug position, then launched Bogota Lex backward with an overhead belly to belly suplex.

Both wrestlers slowly got to their feet and made their way to the corner, where the exterior referee opened the cage door. Bogota Lex blocked Yakuza ZZ from exiting and the two exchanged blows. In the opposite corner, Bogota Lex landed a tornado DDT on Yakuza ZZ. Bogota Lex got to his feet first, and instead of escaping, set up for the Bogota Lex Torture Rack, but Yakuza ZZ countered and catapulted Bogota Lex again into the cage. Yakuza ZZ super kicked Bogota Lex and landed a massive senton and covered for a two-count.

Yakuza ZZ lifted Bogota Lex up onto the top turnbuckle, but Bogota Lex deflected Yakuza ZZ with multiple blows to the head. Yakuza ZZ staggered to another corner, and Bogota Lex dashed in and chop blocked Yakuza ZZ’s left knee from behind. Bogota Lex charged at Yakuza ZZ, still in the corner, but Yakuza ZZ caught him and fired him into the canvas with an ura nage.

Yakuza ZZ made his way to the cage door, but Bogota Lex blocked him and rolled Yakuza ZZ into the Calf Crusher. Yakuza ZZ managed to crawl to the ropes, but there are no rope breaks in this cage match. Yakuza is hanging on as Juanita cheers from the outside -- BUT she has just been surrounded by Yakuza’s security team. Lex let’s go of Yakuza ZZ and is distracted, then out of nowhere, Yakuza ZZ nails him with a spinning heel kick and then nails Lex with an Emerald Flowison finisher. Yakuza ZZ pins for the win.

WINNER: Yakuza ZZ

CBWA Intercontinental Championship - Triple Threat Match

PN NEWS Jr. (c) vs The Colombian Dragon vs Steve Ryder

Colombian Dragon made his ring entrance. Then Steve Ryder. And finally the champ, PN NEWS JR.

Steve Ryder and Colombian Dragon mouthed off to each other as PN News watched. Steve Ryder turned to PN News, soft-slapped him insultingly, and then the fight was on. PN News took both guys down with a double clothesline. PN News sold it like he hurt his arm and all three were slow to get up. A “Let’s Go PN News! chant broke out. Steve Ryder took Colombian Dragon to the floor with a running basement dropkick, then took the attack to him at ringside. When PN News approached, Steve Ryder threw him hard into the ringside barrier. PN News caught Steve Ryder in mid-air and rammed him back-first into the ringpost. Colombian Dragon then sling-shot himself over the top rope with a Forearm to PN News at ringside.

Back in the ring Colombian Dragon struggled to Bogota suplex Steve Ryder. PN News came up behind then and gave a Bogota suplex to both. WOW! Colombian Dragon used a forearm to knock Steve Ryder hard to the floor, then turned to PN News. PN News went for a lariat on Colombian Dragon a minute later, but Colombian Dragon escaped and delivered a flip enzuigiri. Steve Ryder re-entered and sunset flipped Colombian Dragon for a near fall. Colombian Dragon then gave both Steve Ryder and PN News dual DDTs at once. He covered Steve Ryder for a two, then PN News for a two. Colombian Dragon backdropped Steve Ryder over the top rope and Steve Ryder hit his head on the ringside steps. That got Steve Ryder out of the picture for a while, literally, so PN News and Colombian Dragon would wrestle for a while.

PN News hit Samoan Drop for a near fall. Both were slow to get up. Steve Ryder finally returned to the ring and put a sleeper on PN News. PN News made a comeback and celebrated. Colombian Dragon went after PN News from behind and scored a two count. Steve Ryder came up behind Colombian Dragon and face planted him for a near fall.

PN News went into his finishing routine, but Steve Ryder cut him off before the PN Dawn with a flying clothesline off the second rope. Colombian Dragon then knocked PN News out of the ring. Colombian Dragon set up a choke hold on Steve Ryder. Steve Ryder went for a Frankensteiner, but Colombian Dragon countered and scored a two count. Colombian Dragon rolled up Steve Ryder again for a two. They both collided mid-ring and Steve Ryder’s head was on Colombian Dragon’s chest. The ref counted, and Colombian Dragon lifted his shoulder. PN News crawled back into the ring, looking groggy. He smiled. Then he waves his hands and did a double clothesline on both Colombian Dragon and Steve Ryder. He gave Colombian Dragon a suplex. Colombian Dragon rolled out of the ring. Steve Ryder went for a headlock but PN News turned it and locked on a chinlock.

Steve Ryder struggled and made faces. Colombian Dragon broke it up. A minute later Colombian Dragon suplexed PN News on the ring apron, then hit a slingshot springboard 450 splash from the ring apron onto Steve Ryder for a near fall. Great series. Colombian Dragon used an eye rake to counter an Steve Ryder comeback. He hit the Colombian Dragon Splash.

PN News yanked Colombian Dragon off and applied a Motown Philly Sleeper. Steve Ryder held Colombian Dragon’s hand up to prevent a tap, then attacked PN News. A minute later PN News attempted a double-clothesline, but couldn’t finish. Colombian Dragon gave PN News an enzuigiri. Steve Ryder gave Colombian Dragon a spear. Everyone was slow to get up.

Steve Ryder set Colombian Dragon on the top rope. PN News intervened and powerbombed Steve Ryder for a near fall. Colombian Dragon leaped off the top rope onto PN News. PN News rolled through and stood and then lifted Colombian Dragon onto his shoulder. Colombian Dragon broke free and rolled onto PN News and applied a leglock. Steve Ryder broke it up, then applied his own leglock mid-ring. Colombian Dragon crawled toward the bottom rope. PN News came in and applied a Return of the Mack Attack on Colombian Dragon even as Steve Ryder held the leglock on Colombian Dragon’s other leg. Colombian Dragon tapped out. The crowd booed. The ref waved off the finish, though, and said only one man can win. He told them to keep fighting.

Steve Ryder gave PN News a spear, but Colombian Dragon yanked the ref out of the ring before he could count the pin. Steve Ryder dove through the ropes and barely grazed Colombian Dragon at ringside. He threw Colombian Dragon over the English broadcast table. Back in the ring, Steve Ryder climbed to the top rope. PN News went at him and set up an splash off the second rope. He delivered but he also knocked down the referee. The Colombian Dragon entered and bashed PN News with a chair. “No DQ!”

Jimmy Hart just threw his megaphone up to Steve Ryder and he just nailed the Colombian Dragon with it. PN NEWS Jr. is slowly getting up but Ryder nails him with the Megaphone too. Ryder grabs the referee and covers PN NEWS for the pin.

WINNER and NEW CBWA Intercontinental Champion, Steve Ryder!

CBWA World Championship - Gauntlet Match

The Eye of Gibson No Showed The Event

0 notes

kryptoniteismysupergirl · 8 years

Text

i’d make a deal with god

here is the sequel to this. i like promised this a month ago, so happy christmas. sorry if it has any little mistakes, i finished this at 3 am.

4 years. It had been 4 years since Kara had died and left National City for London. She left behind her whole life, but she had to. If it meant Cat was once again safe from harm, safe from her, she would do it over and over again, just to protect her. Max had kept her updated on the Non problem in National City, but something wasn’t quite right. She had never really trusted Max, he helped her start again but she had a gut feeling that he was up to something.

Kara, jumped over the sofa to her phone and had in her hand ready to use when it rang.

“Kara?” Max’s voice crackled through the speaker. Kara was shocked, she was about to call him.

“What’s happened? Is it Non? What’s he done?” Kara frantically asked through the phone

“It’s not him. It’s Cat. She’s going to London. In fact she’s staying in her London apartment which is a block from your loft. Just stay clear of her and that building, okay?” Kara just sat there with her mouth gaped open and tears streaming down her face. “Kara? Kara!”

“Yeah, I’m here. T-thanks.” She said quickly slamming the red button several times and threw it across the room.

Kara had built a new life for herself in London, she had moved away from her friends, family, lover. All to start over as Marley. Kara Danvers was dead, along with Supergirl. This was her chance to get it right.

She still had her powers but kept them hidden. Only using them in the comfort of her own flat away from prying eyes. Sometimes she missed National City. All the people that were a light to her, all the people that praised her for she was. Being away from her home hurt a little less everyday but still hurt. All she wanted was to be back in Cat’s arms surrounded by the people that she loved, but that could never happen.

Meanwhile back in National City, Non was getting fed information about Kara’s new whereabouts from a supposedly unknown source, “I have information about Supergirl if you’re willing to listen,” A voice said through speakers to Non. “She goes by a different name. Marley. She lives in London, has done for the past 4 years. Kara still cares very deeply for her wife, so if you want to get to your niece, go after her. Cat is going to London on the 17th. Follow her. She will lead you straight to your precious Kara.“ The voice then cut off and Non yelled at his guards in kryptonian to go to London and search everywhere for the residence of Kara Danvers.

“Thank you, Maxwell Lord.” Non laughed as he walked off into the darkness to follow his guards.

Carter Danvers-Grant had packed the last off his boxes and looked around his room that had been his home and sanctuary for the past 18 years. He would miss it. He would miss not seeing his mother everyday and making dinner and watching films. He and his mother had grown closer since Kara. When he would catch her crying on her balcony over pictures, drinking scotch he would hug until she stopped. He had been her rock for the past 4 years and now he was leaving her alone. He couldn’t bare to but he had to. He got a scholarship from Harvard for astrophysics.

He heard a sharp in take of breath and he turned to see his mother with one hand in her hip and the other resting on her necklace. It had been the one Kara got her for her birthday, the last one before she disappeared.

“Oh. You’re all packed then.” Cat smiled as Carter nodded and sat down the bed.

“I’m going to miss you. It’ll be lonely without you here. The reason we did game nights was because of you. Now I don’t have a partner.” Cat laughed lightly and then wiped away a tear that rolled down her cheek. Carter stood up and pulled her into a hug.

“You’ll be alright mom. Alex will be here. The whole super-squad will be here. You have all of them. Just not me. Okay.”

"I love you.” Carter said as he kissed her forehead. “I don’t have to leave for another three hours. You want to go and see Ma?”

The cemetery was quite for a Saturday morning. The gargantuan statue of Supergirl stood centre behind rows upon rows of headstones, keeping watch. Protecting all the ones that were lost.

Wrapping her coat around her more and grasping her sons hand she walked up the stone steps in front of the bronze plaque that was Kara’s life.

Kara Zor-El Danvers-Grant Wife, mother, sister, friend, hero El marayah Love binds us all Unknown-2016

The crest of El was placed just below the plaque and Cat ran her fingers over the S. The statue of Supergirl in her signature pose towered over cat as she wiped away the gears that kept falling.

“God, I fucking miss you Kara.” Cat whispered.

Carter squeezed her hand tighter and pulled her into a hug. Cat could always remember the day Alex told them about Kara. She had woke up with a funny feeling in her stomach, somehow she knew what had happened

“It’s Kara. We found her phone.” Alex said as James, Winn, Eliza, and Cat gathered in the main control room at the DEO. They had managed to find her phone but it was dead. There was nothing. 

“So, what is it?” Cat said impatiently as she crossed her arms.

“As of 2:00 am this morning-“ 

“Don’t you dare say what I think you’re going to say.” Cat shouted. “Don’t you dare tell me she’s gone.” James wrapped his arms around Cat and calmed her while Alex continued.

“As of 2:00 am this morning, Supergirl, Kara Zor-el Danvers-Grant was confirmed KIA, killed in action. An explosion was traced to above the city. The bomb…the bomb contained kryptonite dust. The dust particles would be on everything so she wouldn’t have been able to return. Even if she could, it would remain in the air for 3 years.” Cat just shook her head as she was enveloped by various member of the DEO and Kara’s friends and family.

After being taken home by Alex, Cat slowly walked up to her apartment door. She waited outside, not wanting to enter and feel a rush of memories come back to her.   placed her keys in the bowl as she staggered through the door. She drew in a breath and walked to Carter’s room. He sat on the bed, clutching his present that Kara had left for his birthday. It was the blanket that Kal-el arrived in and a painting she done of him wearing her cape.

“Carter.” Cat said as she entered the teenage boys room. He looked up at her in one glance and he knew. He knew instantly. He burst into tears and Cat just held him tight. “It’s going to be okay. I need you now more then I ever have, okay Carter?” She felt the 15 year old nod his head and pulled him tight.

Cat had travelled to London coincidentally when the anniversary of Kar’s death appeared. She kept her self quite and dove into her work, not wanting to get distracted by the tears that would fall. She wasn’t quite sure what it was about London but she felt at home. Something was drawing her to stay, little did she know, she would soon find out what that source would be.

“Goodnight Miss Grant.” her assistant said as he placed the final layouts down on her desk before heading for the lift. Cat was left alone of the floor working on some emergency altercations for the edition of the magazine. Circling the errors that she spotted, she could hear footsteps walk across the bull pen an stop outside her office.

“Yes Andy, what did you forget?” She asked looking up. As she did her eyes caught the sleek black bodysuit of Non and dropped her pen.

“Hello Cat.” Non said as he enter her office. She took off her glasses and stood behind her desk.

“How did you find me Non?” Her voice wavering as she spoke.

“Our dear friend Maxwell Lord has been keeping an eye out.” He took a step closer to her and raised a hand running along her cheek. She pulled away and look disgusted at the man who had tried to kill her and her wife. “And I do believe that you can help me, so I’m going to take you somewhere, where you’ll useful.” He shouted in Kryptonian and three men dressed in black flew to her balcony. They grabbed Cat and flew her away from Catco.

Cat woke up, in an old scarp yard, tied to something. Her hands above her head were roughly tied with rope to a large overhead hook, connecting to a crane that she could see. Her feet were barely touching the roof of the rusty car that was used a platform.

“Supergirl! I know you can hear me! Come and rescue your wife before she ends up dead!” Non called out to the air, knowing Kara was nearby.

“She’s dead. Has been for the past 4 years. She’s not coming.” Cat practically sobbed with the tears running down her cheeks.

“Ah, but that’s where you’re wrong.” Non chuckled, climbing on top of the rusty car and wrapping a hand around her throat, just he saw a red streak fly across the moon.

Cat watched as Kara slammed down into the concrete. Her fist in the rubble. “Get your hands off her.” She said as she slowly raised her head and stared Non down. Cat’s eyes softened and then tears started to form again as she watched Kara stand. Her fists were clenched by her sides and her eyes was dark with anger.

“Ah, my dear niece. How nice of you to show up after 4 years in hiding.” He laughed, Kara walking closer to the rusty car.

“Who told you I was here? How did you find me!” Kara asked as Non stood on the roof staring down at her.

“Your dear friend Mr Lord I believe has been keeping me updated on all your where abouts.”

“This is isn’t about her. Just let her down and we can sort this out. Just you and me.”

Non raised his eyebrows and let go of Cat’s neck. He climbed down of the car and eyed Kara as she stood her ground. He started to run at her then he used his super speed and jumped on top of Kara, sending her skidding across the concrete of the scrap heap. She grabbed a car and threw it at him, but he immediately destroyed it with his heat vision. “Why are you doing this? Why after all this time do you still want to fight me.” Kara said as dodged the punches Non was suddenly throwing at her. She grabbed his fist and twisted back and landed an uppercut with her right fist, sending him flying into the skies above. She waited and then her eyes landed on Cat.

“Hey.” Kara said as she stood in front of Cat.

“That’s all you can say? ‘Hey’ after being gone for 4 fucking years. Kara Danvers you have no fucking idea how much pain you have caused me.” Kara walked up in front of her and then Cat stepped up and slapped Kara across the face. Even though the slap had no effect Kara, she still reacted to it. Turning her face back, Cat just threw her arms around her and pulled her into tightest hug she could.

“I’m so sorry. I’m sorry, I shouldn’t have left you. I’m sorry.” She said and then placed a kiss on Cat’s head. “We need to get out of here before Non comes back.” Kara wrapped an arm around Cat and was about to fly off when Non touched back down. “Go.” she whispered to Cat.

“I am not leaving you again.”

“Cat, I’m serious go. Get out of here.” She practically screamed. Cat ran to cover and watched and Kara and Non had a final show down. Cat hid behind a pile of rusting cars and pulled out her phone. Kara couldn’t do this by herself. She needed help so she called the only person she trusted enough to give Kara that help.

“Alex?

“Cat? What’s wrong?

“It’s Kara. She’s alive. She is alive and fighting Non. I don’t know if she can do it though. She needs help.”

“Okay, I-I’ll send Clark and J’onn. I’ll track them using your phone.” Within minutes, Clark and J’onn touched down as Non had Kara in a vice like grip around her neck.

“Tell your parents I say hello.”

“Tell them yourself!” she shouted as she pushed Non off her and shot heat vision from her eyes. Screaming she took a step closer to him, trying to fight of the beams that were coming from him. With one final push forward she overpowered Non and sent him flying back, smoke coming from his eyes. It was over, she had defeated him. She breathed heavily and then fell to her knees. Her vision started to blur and her head was spinning, she collapsed into the dust and watched as Cat ran over and fell to her knees. She picked up Kara and cradled her in her arms. She stroked Kara’s head and rocked her back and forth.

“Don’t you dare do this to me. Don’t leave me when I’ve only just got you back.” Kara smiled and raised a hand to Cat’s cheek.

“I wouldn’t dream of it.”

“Clark’s here. In case you couldn’t do it, I called Alex and she sent them. She’s on her way Kara and when she gets here, we are going straight home.”

Kara smiled and closed her eyes as Cat held her tight.

National City - 09:02 am

Kara woke up under the sun lamps in a room she didn’t recognise. “Relax Supergirl. This is the new DEO HQ.” J’onn said as he leant on the wall opposite the bed. She groaned as she sat up. “There are a lot of people waiting to say hello.” He said as helped Kara off the bed and immediately into a hug. Kara pulled away from J’onn and limped into the lobby of the new DEO. Lucy, Vasquez and the other agents were all stood in saluting Kara as she entered. She smiled and got pulled into a group hug by all the agents. She pulled away and saw Alex looking at her in disbelief. Alex just broke down in tears and Kara wrapped her up in a crushing hug.

“I’m so sorry.” She whispered into Alex’s hair as she kissed her head. “I’m so sorry.” Alex pulled away and smiled.

“I, erm, I want to introduce you to someone. This is Maggie.” A dark haired woman stepped forward and took Kara’s hand. “My girlfriend.” Kara smiled and then pulled Maggie in for a hug. “Welcome to the family.” She said in Maggie’s ear.

“What about Max, has been taken care off?” Kara’s face sunk watching Alex.

“He’s going to go away for a very long time, the caught him for tax evasion.” Alex chuckled squeezing Maggie’s hand.

“I would really love to stay but I’m afraid my wife is expecting me back home so I really need to go. Alex, can you drive me home?” Her sister nodded and Kara limped through the main floor to the elevators. As soon as the doors shut, Kara turned to Maggie and started to shoot questions at her.

“So, how long have you two known each other? When did this happen and how serious is it?”

Maggie tried to stutter her words out but nothing came out. “Erm, 3 years, 2 years and 6 months ago and pretty serious. I mean we live together so.” Alex intertwined her fingers with Maggie’s and rested her head on her shoulder. They reached the lobby and Kara stopped at the doors.

“You ready to do this?” I mean we can use the back exit if you want.” Kara shock her head and stepped out of the doors into the bright light National City. Three guards had walked out with them and protected kara from all the people who tired to come up to her. All three of them jumped into the back of the black SUV waiting for her.

“What time is it?”

“09:18” maggie said checking her watch.

“Change of plan, head to my apartment let me get changed, we’re making a stop at Noonans and then to CatCo.”

“Yes, Supergirl.” The driver said as he turned the wheel to head to kara’s apartment.

Kara jumped out and headed up to her apartment. She hasn’t been to her old apartment since she and Cat had that massive argument while they were dating. It was over something stupid but Kara always regrets that day.

“You can’t just go in somewhere without back up Kara! Who knows what could have happened, you could have got injured and no one would have known!” Cat said as Kara was getting changed out of her supersuit. Kara pulled the hoodie over head and the headed to the kitchen as Cat kept following her about telling her how stupid she was.

“But I didn’t okay. I’m here. I’m not going anywhere, just because you’re worried I might leave you for someone younger doesn’t mean you can control me!” Cat’s eyes went wide and she placed a hand on her chest. Kara immediately regretted snapping. She knew that that was one Cat’s biggest fears, that Kara would realise that she could do so much better, then walk out and never return. Kara furrowed her brow and shook her head. “Cat.” Kara said softly as she edged forward towards Cat.

“Get out.” Cat practically whispered, giving Kara a very stoic look. Kara edged forward once again but Cat raised her voice. “Get the fuck out of my house.” Kara just hung her head low, nodded and used a burst of super speed to pack a small bag. She walked to door with the rucksack on her back, grabbing her leather jacket and helmet as she turned to the kitchen she saw Cat in the same position, hand on her chest, the other on her hip with her head hung low.

“I love you.” Kara said as she opened the door and stepped out. Closing the door behind her, she waited for a couple of seconds and used her x-ray vision to watch as Cat, slid down the cupboard and landed on the floor, sobbing.

Kara walked down to the underground parking garage and found her bike. Swinging one leg over the seat, and starting the engine, she watched as the family who lived opposite them returned. She often saw them in the mornings when she would go out for her run. Nodding her head and smiling, she started the engine. The small boy running behind them with a supergirl figure in his hand, made her smile. Pulling on her helmet she speed out of the garage and raced through the traffic to her apartment.

She staggered up the stairs and slumped against the door of her apartment. Thumping her fist against the wood, she fell to the floor. Alex found her an hour later as Kara’s neighbour called her after finding Kara in a heap outside of the apartment door. “Come on.” Alex said as she picked up Kara and opened the door. The apartment was basically empty after she had moved in the Cat.She moved a lot of her things over only leaving the major pieces of furniture. “Kara, I need you to co-operate. We can sort this out, i just need you to not act like someone kicked your dog and help me.”

“I don’t have a dog.” Kara said as she flopped down onto the sofa face first. “She told me to get out of her house. ‘Her house’ Alex. She called it her house. Not our house, her house. I’ve only lived there for 3 years and now suddenly it’s just her house.”

“What did you say to her?”

“What?” Kara grunted.

“What did you do?”

Kara then went on to explain about the fight with the alien and the argument they had at the apartment.

“I just exploded, I didn’t mean to.” Alex raised an eyebrow as she watched Kara sulk into a cushion from the sofa. That moment there was a soft knock at the door, Kara x-rayed it and saw Cat standing the other side of the white metal door. Alex got up from her seat and answered the door to the woman she hated right now.

“Can I speak to Kara?” Cat said as she stood in the doorway. Alex raised an eyebrow, and let Cat into the apartment. Kara was sat on the sofa with her head resting on her knees. Alex grabbed her jacket and left them in peace in the quite apartment.

“I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to explode.”

“Kara, you had every right to explode. I’m the one who should be apologising. Will you forgive me.” Cat said as she placed her forehead against the blonde superhero’s and sighed. Kara unlatched her arms from around her knees and pulled Cat in for a hug.

“I love you.” Kara whispered into Cat’s hair.

After changing into something more “sunny Danvers” as Cat would say she ordered a very large bouquet of red roses to be delivered to Cat as she arrived. Alex dropped her off at the Catco building and then Kara walked through to the main lobby. This would be the first time James and Winn would see her in 4 years and she couldn’t wait. Walking over to elevators she pushed the button for the 40th floor and stepped into the metal box that take her to her love. Just as she exited she saw the bouquet of flowers being given to Cat’s new assistant.

“Miss Grant, these came for you.” She overheard Alexis say. “There’s no name only a card with the letters ‘KDG’ on it.” Kara stepped out of the elevators and into the crowded bullpen. Everything slowed down and the hushed whispers started to fill her ears.

“Kara?” She turned and saw James standing with Winn close by, both with softened expressions on their faces.

“Hey.” she said just before Winn threw his arms around her with James following shortly behind.

“We’ve missed you.” James said pulling away. Kara nodded and slowly walked into Cat’s office. She was facing the large wall of TV screens admiring the red roses that sat front and centre on her desk. She slowly walked behind her then wrapped her arms around her waist.

“Who has been sending my wife flowers? I thought you promised to keep your mistresses separate from our life.” She whispered as Cat leaned back into Kara’s embrace.

“When did you get here.” Cat said as she turned in her wife’s arms and placed a hand on her cheek. Cat had missed that smile and those eyes. She missed waking up to a sunny danvers smile and strong arms wrapped around her middle.

“Like two minutes ago. I had to say hello to the boys, but I wanted to say hello to my amazing wife.” Kara leaned down and placed a small but loving kiss on Cat’s lips.

“Mom?” Kara turned and saw Carter who was no longer a teenager but a young man. She smiled as he ran into her arms. “I’m so sorry. I should never have left. I should have found another way. I’m so sorry I left you. I’m so sor-“

“-Kara you say sorry one more time and you’re sleeping on the couch.” Cat laughed as Kara drew both of her favourite Grants into her arms. She was home, and she was never ever leaving again.

#supercat #supercat fic #I'm sorry its bad i just haven't been up to writing #my shitty stories

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askroahmmythril · 3 years

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Reference List for amiibo Fighter Names (Set 6)

56) Marth : PrizedHero - If memory serves, this was kind of a shared suggestion from friends who were playing Fire Emblem Heroes. Again, Fire Emblem is not exactly my area of expertise, so given some visual references to work with, I went for it, depicting Marth as a high rarity unit for the gacha system of the game. I added more capsule machine elements to it to make it a bit more stylized. Also the idea of Marth popping out of a capsule amuses me.

57) Corrin : Dovahkiin - Pretty solidly a Skyrim reference, Corrin here is the Dragonborn. GIven what little I know about the actual character of Corrin, the idea worked in my mind. I wanted to have him charging some Alteration magic just because I really liked how unique the hand effect looked in the game. Drawing Corrin’s armor was a pain in the tail, that much I remember o.o;

58) Fox : Wildestyle - This one is a reference to Zootopia. It pretty quickly became one of my favorite Disney movies, so putting Fox in Zootopia worked in my mind. Of all things for visual references, the scenery came largely from the main menu of the DVD. I filled it out with a few different characters from the movie, Nick and Judy of course, the business lemmings just because they were easy to fill space with, and Clawhauser because he was a personal favorite character. And of course I gave Fox a pawpcicle and a Disney phone

59) Ryu : Umeshoryu - This one was a suggestion from Neo, a reference to Daigo Umehara, a skilled player of fighting games. The Umeshoryu is a technique named as a combination of his name and Ryu’s Shoryuken. Essentially it’s a perfectly timed uppercut type move that has to be timed just right, or else you’re highly open to punishment. I had to look up visual references of him, and found images of a unique way he holds controllers, so I tried to replicate that with Ryu. Which drawing hands is already difficult. So trying to mimic such a precise sort of positioning of fingers, that was a thing.

60) Mii Brawler : UrbanChamp - A reference to an old NES game, Urban Champion. Essentially it was a very basic fighting game where you used high and low punches to try to push your opponent off their side of the screen, while dodging flower pots being thrown out windows.

61) Bayonetta (Player 2) : Let’sDance - A combo reference to Bayo’s final dance number at the end of the first game, and Dance Dance Revolution. Surprisingly, I was actually pretty into DDR for awhile. The overall scenery is supposed to be a fountain in a park-like area you find as you walk through Vigrid. I just remember really liking how that area looks. I was looking over DDR titles and went with 3rd MIX as a title to parody by instead calling it 3rd CLIMAX.

62) R.O.B. (Famicom) : ¥AMATOBOT - Given the Famicom was the Japanese variant of the NES, I wanted to go with some Japanese style to this one. For the background, I largely took inspiration from the background mural of E. Honda’s stage from Street Fighter 2. I replaced the banner though with the Japanese writing for Nintendo (I’m honestly not 100% sure which style of writing that is, as I know there are a lot of different names for different styles of characters). R.O.B.’s pose is a reference to Auto’s pose on his CD Database image from Mega Man & Bass.

63) Mega Man (Gold) : DLN-C3PO - A Star Wars reference because, let’s be honest, he’s a solidly gold colored robot, so it made sense to me. The DLN references the serial numbers of robots created by Dr. Light, standing for Doctor Light Number. I debated using Eddie for the R2-D2 stand-in, but in the end, a Met worked much better in my mind, having the more dome shape with its hard hat. The background was largely taken from Tomahawk Man’s stage, but with a second sun added to reference the desert planet Tatooine.

64) Young Link : 72HourHero - A reference to the game Half Minute Hero, which I’ve always wanted to try out, but never had access to it. It seemed like a fun concept. Young Link however is the 72 Hour Hero since that’s how long he has in Majora’s Mask. The woman with the hourglass is Half Minute Hero’s Goddess of Time, who takes your money to reset the clock for you in each stage. Skull Kid and the Moon are of course Majora’s Mask references. I wanted to fill more of the negative space, but didn’t really have any ideas there. As for Young Link, I accidentally gave him the wrong sword, as I forgot what his sword in Melee looked like. He’s thus based at least a bit more on his Hyrule Warriors appearance, as that’s what was more familiar to me at the time.

65) Roy : RegionLock - The idea here was that Roy was the only character to not get his game localized outside of Japan. Honestly, I’m not sure if this is still true or not? I know there are fan translations, but not sure about OFFICIAL localizations. The Japanese writing on the nameplate simply says “REGION LOCK” repeatedly, though I’m not 100% sure I have the correct writing for what was intended there? Question of how much can I trust Google Translate I’m afraid. As such might be something that needs updating as well. The other characters shown here are others that didn’t get official translations of their games outside of Japan : Hikari and Donbe from Shin Onigashima, Takamaru from Mysterious Murasame Castle, and Lip from Panel de Pon. Again, unsure if any of these actually did get official translations eventually, maybe via Virtual Console or NES / SNES Online or such?

66) Snake : Orange Box - One of the most standard cardboard boxes Snake tends to use for cover is simply labeled “The Orange.” So... the Orange Box. Which was also the name of a bundle of games released by Valve, made up of Team Fortress 2, Half-Life 2, and Portal. Thus we have Snake in a Portal test chamber with a Turret aiming through a portal, Gordon Freeman’s crowbar sitting on a desk along with the intel briefcase from Team Fortress 2. I emulated the Valve logo, but instead wrote Kojima, referencing Hideo Kojima, creator of the Metal Gear series.

67) Wolf : Tankjacker - The overall style of this one is meant to emulate cover art for a Grand Theft Auto game, the joke being that this is how Wolf ended up with his Landmaster in Brawl, just going in and stealing one. Alas, this reference is outdated since he no longer has it in Ultimate.... but honestly I love the reference too much so I’ll probably keep this idea. We will have to update his outfit though of course, as this one is still based on his Brawl design.

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hemcountry · 7 years

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DON'T THINK TWICE....A NUMBER 1's ALRIGHT!

Hello Everybody,

Welcome to the latest update of my country music diary. If you’ve been here before, then welcome back and thank you so much for returning. If this is your first time joining me, then I’m delighted that you’ve chosen to take some time to stop by. Hopefully you’ll enjoy the next little while in my company and come next time ’round I’ll be welcoming you all back, too!

Well, it’s really been a pretty crazy time since my last diary! But thankfully, crazy in some truly amazing ways for me. There’s been the release of my latest single, ‘Don’t Think Twice’, which has also become my first ever number 1. And in just the last week or so, my brand new video for this single has also been released. And before all of that, I was lucky enough, not to mention both honoured and humbled too, to pick up my second big award in country music when I received the Gene Stuart Inspiration Music Award at this year’s Hot Country Awards Concert. In fact, I picked up another wonderful and thoughtful surprise from Hugh O’ Brien (Hot Country founder and host) on the night, too. More about that later on!

Olivia being presented with her Hot Country Award by Billy Morrissey

This year’s concert was held in the beautiful Slieve Russell Hotel in Ballyconnell, county Cavan, the same venue as last year’s show. I was scheduled to take to the stage early, much to my delight as it meant I didn’t have to worry about being nervous for too long! And that’s always good with me! Anytime you perform in front of over 1,000 fans, though, and not too mention so many of the biggest names in the business as well, I think a few nerves are probably normal! Most of the time at awards concerts it’s a good sign that you’re likely to be winning something if you’re also asked to perform. But even knowing this, I can honestly say that I wasn’t even thinking about anything like that as I was waiting to go on stage. I just wanted to make sure I gave all of the fans there a performance worthy of the night that was in it. We decided to play ‘Good Hearted Woman’, another of my singles, because it’s such a well-known song and it always goes down well ‘live.’

As soon as the song ended I was joined on stage by the well-known music promoter and songwriter Billy Morrissey who presented me with the Gene Stuart Music Inspiration Award. If you’re a fan of Irish country music, then you’ll have heard of Gene. Sadly, he passed away in recent years but he’s still every bit as loved now as he was during his lifetime. For me, as a singer, to be in any way associated with such a huge figure in the history of Irish country music, well, it’s something I’m still in shock at in some ways, if I’m honest. But I’m also very proud of it, too, of course. And I’ll do my best to live up to the honour every time I step up on stage.

Olivia Hot Country Red Carpet

The other wonderful surprise that Hugh O’ Brien had for me, the one I mentioned briefly earlier, was the gorgeous piece of Galway Crystal that I would have received last year had I been able to attend the Hot Country Awards Concert and perform as planned. Unfortunately I was very sick at the time and just wasn’t able to be there. But this year, as I was chatting with some fans, Hugh came over and said to me, ‘You stay where you are now, I’ll be back in a minute and I have something for you.’ I didn’t think too much about it because we were posing for photos left and right at the time, but sure enough when Hugh returned a few minutes later he had a box in his hands which he placed in mine with the words, ‘Now, I didn’t forget about you.’ When I opened it up and saw what was inside I couldn’t believe it. I think an act like that says a lot about Hugh and the kind of man he is that he kept that safe for me all year round and then, with a whole new concert to organise for this year, he still remembered to bring it along. A lovely gesture, and one I definitely won’t forget. Thanks Hugh!

In fact, that whole week turned out to be one I won’t forget in a hurry. The Hot Country Awards Concert was on the Tuesday, and the following Friday my new single, ‘Don’t Think Twice’, was officially released. As some of you guys will know, I still work a full-time job during the week as well as gigging at weekends, and often times on week nights as well. So by the time that Friday came around, I was in a fair old state of tiredness! Not very ‘rock and roll’ to admit, I know! The upside of that, though, was that I probably wasn’t as nervous about the single being released as I’d usually be about something big like that, because I was so badly in need of some decent sleep!

Olivia on the set of the ‘Don’t Think Twice’ video shoot

When the news reached me on Saturday evening that ‘Don’t Think Twice’ had gone to number 1 on the iTunes Irish country chart, my first time to top the charts, I couldn’t believe it. I was as happy as I can remember being in a long time. For one thing, it meant that people actually liked the song! That’s something that every artist worries about and none of us take for granted, believe me. So yeah, weird as it might sound, one of my first reactions was simply relief. I’ve often heard stories about people getting to number 1 and they’d say they only found out when they heard it on the radio, or got a call from their manager or whatever. And I used to wonder if finding out about something as huge as getting to number 1 could really happen so casually. But now I know it can, because that’s what happened to me. I was sitting at home having a cup of tea, half-trying to get some rest, half-thinking about what I needed to do to get ready for a gig that night, when I got a text from a friend with a screenshot of the chart. It was definitely a little surreal seeing my name above Taylor Swift, I can tell ya! And I’m pretty sure it made the last few sips of that cuppa taste even sweeter than usual, too!

I was also delighted to be invited along to play at a special concert organised by the radio station Tipp FM the week after the Hot Country Awards. Trudi Lalor, who has been one of the leading ladies in Irish country for many’s a year now, is also a presenter with Tipp FM, and she and Billy Morrissey (the same Billy who presented me with my Hot Country Award) were kind enough to ask me to come along and be part of what turned out to be a sold-out show and an amazing night. Even though I could barely walk, because by this stage I had no good ankles left after somehow managing to sprain them both in the space of a few days (it could only happen to me!!), I didn’t let that stop me from being there!

Olivia and Keelan at the Tipp FM Concert

Something else that I’m really excited about, and delighted to be able to tell you all about, is the brand new video for ‘Don’t Think Twice’ which has just been released as well. I’ve teamed up with Uppercut Productions again, and as always, the results have been fantastic. I’m a big believer in letting talented and creative people do what they do best when it comes to my videos. I’m always open to different ideas and possibilities. Obviously, as the artist involved, I think it’s important that I have some input into what happens, and that I feel comfortable about the project. But once I buy into and believe in a concept I try to make sure I allow as much freedom as possible to the team of people charged with bringing a plan from the blueprint stage into reality. I think that kind of mutual respect and trust is one of the biggest factors in producing results that everyone involved can be happy with and proud of. And I’m definitely happy with and proud of this video. I hope you guys will like it too!

Olivia at John Hogan’s 30th Anniversary Show

Before I leave you, I want to take a moment to send out a very special word of congratulations to John Hogan, who is celebrating thirty years in country music in 2017. Without even the slightest shadow of a doubt, John is one of the true gentlemen of this business. I’ve never heard anyone with a bad word to say about him, and if I ever do, I know that will reflect more on whoever’s talking than it will on John. He always has time for any young artist starting out, and is so generous with his time and his experience. He’s one of a kind, and it was a real pleasure for me to be a part of another one of his Thirty Years celebration shows at The Well in Moate recently. Also there on the night was the brilliant Caitlin, one of my own favourite singers, and a beautiful lady whose personality is every bit as warm and wonderful as her gorgeous voice. And here’s a heads-up for you all: keep an ear open for a young girl called Sarah Hogan, a niece of John’s, and someone who has everything it takes to keep country music fans in Ireland either glued to their seats or packing out the dancehalls all across the country. Sarah has a voice I can see everyone quickly falling in love with, and with her uncle John in her corner, she has the very man to guide her in the right direction.

Sheerin Shindig poster

Well that’s all from me for now. The next big date for me is the Sheerin Family Summer Shindig where I’ll be joining my old friend Robert Mizzell, the brilliant Lisa McHugh, and the lovely Matt Leavy for a day of country music fun! I can’t wait for it, and I’ll tell you guys all about it next time we meet.

Until then, folks, take care of yourselves, and look after each other, too.

Much Love, Olivia xoxo

DON’T THINK TWICE….A NUMBER 1’s ALRIGHT! was originally published on HEM COUNTRY

#Country Music Diary #Hot Country Awards #Hot Country TV #Irish Country #Olivia Douglas #countrymusic #countrynews. IrishCountry #UKCountry

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almajonesnjna · 7 years

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We Tried It for You: Platefit

“This might tickle your nose. That’s normal,” says my fitness instructor Brooke Pascoe — not words you typically hear when you’re about to start a workout. But this isn’t just any workout. This is Platefit, an uber trendy L.A. fitness studio where class-goers exercise on a vibrating box called a Power Plate.

THE BASICS

Power Plate technology is nothing new — the former Soviet Union used vibrating plates in the ‘60s to keep Russian cosmonauts’ muscles from atrophying in space, and celebs ranging from Madonna to Eva Longoria sing its praises. But the workout has only recently become popular to a wider public, thanks largely to fitness studios like Platefit, which opened its doors to the public just last year.

Every Platefit class is totally different, which keeps you from getting bored. Platefit offers bootcamp-style classes, barre classes, yoga spin-offs and kickboxing classes at its two studios in West Hollywood and Brentwood. The common thread tying these classes together is the mixture of cardio, strength and recovery done in each class on the power plates.

“The machine moves up and down, front to back, right to left,” says Platefit creator Rachael Blumberg. By vibrating your muscles, you ensure they’re constantly engaged, dialing up the impact of your workout. “It’s medically proven to accelerate your workout,” she adds. “It also helps with cellulite and makes you look younger.”

Research backs up the health and fitness claims. A 2017 study of obese mice in the journal Endocrinology found that whole-body vibration had a positive impact on the mice’s metabolism, much like actual exercise, reducing insulin levels. Research from SANADERM Professional Clinic for Skin Disease and Allergology also found that just exercising on a PowerPlate for 8–13 minutes, 2–3 times a week resulted in a 25.7% reduction in the appearance of cellulite over six months.

The PowerPlate has long been a secret of celebs and those wealthy enough to own the plates or work out on them with personal trainers. Blumberg trained people privately in West Hollywood for 10 years before deciding to open her doors to the public.

MY EXPERIENCE

I took one of their most popular classes in the Brentwood studio, PLATEFIT-PowerPlate, which incorporates calisthenics and bodyweight exercises into the mix.

Pascoe starts out class by getting us to jog in place on the plates, which helps me get used to the strange new sensation. The power plate “contracts your muscles 30–50 times per second,” explains Blumberg. “That’s 900 times in 30 seconds. It’s like an intensified bosu ball, using 98% of your muscle fibers.” To say the vibrating plate “might tickle” is an understatement. The vibration made my ears feel oddly full; I couldn’t speak without my voice shaking; my eyes were watering; every single muscle fiber in my body — muscles I didn’t even know existed — felt like they were twitching simultaneously.

Next we’re doing jumping jacks, then squat jumps — all on the plates. This is an interval-style class, and we’re switching between moves really quickly — often in less than a minute. Then, Pascoe amps up the intensity, leading us into a super fun series of double-legged donkey kicks, as we hold onto the vibrating hand rails for dear life. Before I know it, we’ve switched to boxing, and I’m cranking out a series of uppercuts and crossbody jabs. Every move seems designed to work as many different muscle groups as possible. Case in point: I find myself standing with one leg on the plate and one on the ground, a weight in one arm. We bend one leg, raising our knees to meet the opposite elbows, crunching our abs while simultaneously doing reps with the weight. Now that’s multitasking!

Thankfully the classes are short — only 27 minutes. I feel like I’m going to collapse into a sweaty twitching heap when we hold planks with our hands on the vibrating plate. At one point I actually retreat into a child’s pose, but manage to force myself to go on. We do what feels like a never-ending series of running planks, plank jacks and plank twists. As if that wasn’t challenging enough, Pascoe instructs us to do side planks while doing weight reps with our upper hand. Platefit lets its instructors bring their own personality to class, and Pascoe’s is creative with high energy, albeit mildly torturous, sequences. At one point, we hold medicine balls over our heads and smash them down on the plate. It’s a killer arm workout and definitely gets your aggression out on the plate, like payback time. We end in a series of stretches, which feel like a well-deserved treat.

Though many swear by whole-body vibration training regimens, they’re not for everybody. The British Journal of Sports Medicine reports: “when vibration transmission frequency is too high, some can experience motion sickness-like symptoms.” The Power Plate company explains that people with conditions such as vertigo and detached retina might be sensitive to vibration and ought to consult their physician before integrating the plates into their workouts. Thankfully, while having a machine contract my muscles 30–50 times per second did feel pretty strange, I soon got used to the sensation and was able to stick it out.