#Unreal Overflows | Explore Tumblr posts and blogs

certaimromance · 5 months ago

Text

𝜗𝜚 Calamitous Love.

Spencer Reid x BAU!reader

main masterlist

Summary: After an accident, many memories are wiped from your mind. Luckily, your fiancé is always by your side...but were you planning to break off the engagement before the accident?

Words: 3,7k.

Warnings & Tags: fem!reader. mention of injuries, serial killers, memory loss, traffic accident. SO bittersweet. angst with open ending. english isn't my first language (sorry for my mistakes, be kind please).

Note: I am just like Matthew and sometimes I love to traumatize Spencer, I’m sorry but I miss the one shots.

Spencer Reid was the perfect man. His bright brown eyes, warm and impossibly sincere, never lied. His thin lips had a special way of puckering when he thought too much, a telltale sign of his mind working through puzzles only he could solve. And his heart, the purest you had ever known, overflowed with kindness, empathy, and a love so profound it felt almost unreal. Spencer Reid was smart, brilliant beyond measure, with a mind that held an entire universe of knowledge. He could recite the most obscure facts with ease, analyze the most complex theories in seconds, and yet, the most precious thing about him was his willingness to learn how to love you the way you needed to be loved. He observed, listened, and adapted, making sure every touch, every word, and every glance was precisely what would make you feel cherished. Because Spencer Reid was everything anyone could wish to have, and yet, against all odds, you were the lucky one who had him.

You happily reminded yourself of that every single day as you looked down at your engagement ring, the one he had given you, a tangible reminder that he had chosen you just as wholeheartedly as you had chosen him, for a lifetime together.

When you thought of marriage to him, it wasn’t just about the idea of forever. It was the depth of what that forever would mean. You remembered the moment he knelt before you, hands trembling slightly, asking the question you’d only ever dreamed of hearing. You didn’t just picture him standing at the altar, waiting for you to approach in your beautiful dress. No, you thought about everything that would come after, how it would feel to swear to love each other through all of life’s trials, even beyond death. You imagined growing old by his side, sharing the quiet moments as the years went by, and how those ordinary moments would become extraordinary in his presence. You thought about starting a family, building a life together, and raising children in a home filled with the same love and devotion you had always dreamed of.

Together through thick and thin. That thought echoed in your mind, looping over and over as you slowly drifted back to consciousness. The first thing you registered was the dull ache spreading through your body, a heavy, lingering pain that made every breath feel just a little too sharp. The sterile scent of antiseptic flooded your senses, mixing with the faint, artificial coolness of the hospital air. The steady beeping of machines provided a rhythmic pulse to the silence. Blinking against the dim light, your gaze slowly adjusted to your surroundings. The faint glow of a monitor, the crisp white sheets draped over you, the IV taped to your arm. But none of it answered the one question that burned in your mind. What happened?

Then, your eyes found him.

Spencer.

He was curled up on the couch beside you, his head leaning against the backrest, his posture weighed down by exhaustion. His long limbs were awkwardly folded, his body hunched forward in a way that made it clear he hadn’t moved in hours. Dark circles bruised the delicate skin beneath his eyes, and yet, even in sleep, he remained tethered to you. His fingers barely grazed the edge of your gurney, as if even unconscious, he needed to be close. Needed to feel you were still there.

Your gaze drifted lower, catching the soft gleam of metal on his finger. The engagement ring. A silent promise. A future you had once envisioned so clearly. And without thinking, you glanced at your own hand, expecting the comforting weight of your matching ring. But all you found was the sterile chill of the IV line taped to your skin. Your heart stuttered. A small, uneasy pit settled in your stomach. Where is it?

You looked up just as Spencer stirred, his body shifting as he slowly blinked awake. A groggy hand dragged across his face, fingers rubbing at his tired eyes in an attempt to shake off the haze of sleep. And then, his gaze landed on you.

Relief hit him like a crashing wave. His posture snapped upright, exhaustion momentarily forgotten as his entire focus narrowed in on you. The sheer intensity of his expression sent warmth flooding through your chest, his eyes roamed your face as if memorizing every detail, as if needing to reassure himself that you were really okay.

“You’re awake,” he breathed, his voice rough from sleep, yet thick with emotion. His hand moved toward yours instinctively, but then he hesitated, hovering for just a moment, uncertainty flickering in his eyes, as if he feared you might pull away. But when you didn’t, his fingers brushed against your skin, hesitant yet desperate for contact. “How do you feel? Are you in pain? Should I get a nurse?”

Your lips parted to answer, but the words didn’t come immediately. Your throat was dry, and your mind was sluggish, struggling to pull itself together. The memories that flickered in your mind felt like fragments of a broken puzzle, pieces that were out of reach, not quite forming a whole picture. The last thing you could clearly recall felt distant, blurred at the edges like a forgotten dream, slipping through your fingers as you tried desperately to hold onto it.

You cleared your throat, your voice low, barely above a whisper. “What…happened? Why am I here?”

Your fiancé's expression shifted instantly, relief giving way to something heavier, something uncertain. His fingers curled slightly against your hand, his grip featherlight yet steady, as if afraid he might hurt you. He exhaled a slow, measured breath, gathering his thoughts before answering.

“You were in a car accident,” he said softly, his voice cracking slightly under the weight of the words, though he kept his gaze steady on you.

A car accident.

The words felt foreign, distant, like they belonged to someone else’s reality, not yours. Of all the ways you could have been hurt, this was the least likely, the least expected. Your life was a constant dance with danger, chasing monsters through dark alleyways, walking into crime scenes still heavy with the ghosts of violence, facing down men who thrived on fear. Those were the risks you understood, the dangers you had accepted long ago.

But this? This was ordinary. This was the kind of thing that happened to people who weren’t constantly looking over their shoulders, to people who weren’t trained to anticipate threats before they struck. You weren’t reckless. You weren’t careless. You didn’t lose control.

“You abandoned the way,” he continued softly, watching you closely. “They said you must’ve lost control, maybe got distracted…or something. Your car went off the road and crashed into a ditch.” His voice faltered, just slightly, as if saying the words out loud made them more real. It was as if almost for a moment, a trace of guilt had escaped in his tone.

A cold chill ran through you, a sense of vertigo pulling at your chest. You stared at him, eyes wide, trying to process, trying to understand. But your mind remained blank, an empty canvas where everything should have been. There were no fragments of memories of the accident. No flashes of panic or the sudden jolt of the car swerving out of control. No sensation of the crash itself, just a void, a sharp nothingness.

“I don’t remember,” you whispered, the words slipping out as you blinked, as though trying to will the memories back into place.

“That’s normal,” he said, his voice soothing, though there was an unmistakable trace of worry beneath it. “Memory loss can happen after a concussion. It might come back soon.”

A concussion. The dull ache in your skull suddenly made sense. You lifted your free hand instinctively, but he was quicker, catching your wrist before your fingers could brush against what you now realized was a bandage wrapped around your head.

“You hit your head pretty hard,” he said, his thumb absently tracing over your skin, as if grounding himself as much as grounding you. “But the doctors said you’re going to be okay. You just…need time.”

Time.

It should have been comforting. But all you could think about was the emptiness of your memory, the lost hours, the lost moment when everything must have gone wrong, and the exact reasons why. You didn't usually drive alone, you didn't like the silence of the car, and you took your fiancé with you wherever you went. However, he seemed unharmed and just tired. You felt very confused, pressured, and lost as you remembered the ring that was missing from your finger.

You swallowed hard, trying to push past the dizziness that seemed to rise with every thought, trying to steady your racing heart. Your voice came out steadier this time, though there was still a tremor in it. “Where’s my ring?”

Spencer blinked at you, clearly taken off guard by the question. “What ring?” he asked, his brows furrowing, confusion flickering in his eyes.

“The most important ring in the world, love,” you whispered. “My engagement ring.”

The silence that followed seemed eternal, the tension palpable, thick in the air between the two of you. Spencer's eyes widened when he realized what you were speaking, and his breath caught. He blinked, as if trying to understand why the absence of the ring you'd taken off yourself had bothered you so much, why you'd called him “love” after two months of not doing so, why his touch suddenly didn't seem to bother you. Something wasn’t right, and it was all too clear to him now. Something was wrong with you.

The realization hit him like a bolt, but before he could say anything, you broke the moment, the tension too much to bear. “This sucks,” you muttered, your voice quieter now but tinged with frustration. “My head hurts.”

The sudden shift in your tone startled him, pulling him back to the present. His concern resurfaced, his gaze softening as he quickly leaned closer, his hand still holding yours. “How much? On a scale of one to ten?” he asked, his voice anxious, the worry evident in his eyes.

You squeezed your eyes shut, the pressure in your skull making everything feel worse, as if you could feel your brain pulsing in rhythm with the pain. Your fingers tightened around his hand. “Eleven,” you muttered, trying to force the words out with a breathless chuckle. The ridiculousness of it wasn’t lost on you, but you didn’t care. The truth was that it hurt, and you needed something else. Anything to make the ache go away.

His expression darkened with concern, and you saw his muscles tense as though he were already preparing to leave and find a nurse, a doctor, anyone who could help you. But before he could move, you caught his hand in yours, your fingers curling around his. “No,” you said softly, shaking your head. “Don’t call a doctor.”

He hesitated for a moment, still unsure of what to do, but his eyes never left you, his worry so palpable that you could practically feel it like a weight pressing down on both of you. “Then what do you need?” he asked gently, his voice soft, almost pleading. His thumb brushed lightly across your knuckles as if trying to comfort you, as if trying to bring you back to something you could hold onto.

You didn’t answer him right away. Instead, you let out a shaky breath, still feeling the tension in your body, the unease that gripped you. Your fingers slid to the side of his face, the touch so light it almost felt like a dream, and you tilted your head to meet his gaze.

“Give me love,” you whispered, the words escaping your lips with a sudden tenderness, an unexpected vulnerability. You needed him. Not just in the way your body craved the relief of his touch, but in the deeper, more desperate way that your soul was aching for connection, for his warmth.

Spencer blinked, his breath catching as he looked at you, clearly surprised by your request. He took a small, confused step back, his brows furrowing in bewilderment. “What?”

“Kiss me, fool,” you murmured, your voice lower now, almost teasing, trying to make light of the moment even though everything inside you felt like it was unraveling. You could see the hesitation in his eyes, the way he was torn between the confusion that had settled in his mind and the longing in his chest.

The way you’d spoken to him, the way you’d touched him, it was all too much. Yet too little, too fragile, and too desperate at once.

“You…you want me to kiss you?” His voice was quiet, still unsure. But you could see the faintest shimmer of hope in his eyes, a flicker of something that made him believe, just for a second, that maybe things weren’t as broken as they seemed. That maybe you were still you, still his, still something real, even if everything else had changed.

“Don’t tell me my face looked that bad after the accident,” you teased, your voice weak but laced with a dry humor you hoped might ease the tension hanging between you both.

“No…you’re perfect, pretty as always.”

You tilted your head slightly, still feeling the remnants of confusion and loneliness swirling in the space between you both. “You said that because you love me,” you murmured, a small smile playing at the corner of your lips, but it was tinged with a vulnerability you could no longer hide. “Now I want a mirror.”

“A mirror?” He repeated, his voice soft but curious, unsure of where this was leading. He glanced around the room as if expecting a mirror to appear out of nowhere, but the expression on your face made it clear that wasn’t the answer you were seeking. His eyes turned back to you, searching for more understanding.

“Or a kiss,” you added quietly, the weight of the words making your chest tighten. “Hug, touch? I need physical affection.”

Spencer’s breath caught again. His fingers twitched slightly as if wanting to reach out, but still, something held him back. Something about the rawness of your request, the way you were looking at him with that strange mixture of vulnerability and need, made him pause. The last few months, the distance, the silence, the space, it all came rushing back, threatening to collapse in on him, on both of you. He didn’t know how to bridge the gap, but here you were, asking for something he hadn’t dared hope for, something real, something close.

You needed him.

His eyes softened, and for a brief, fleeting moment, the world outside of the hospital room seemed to fade away, leaving just the two of you. His heart ached with the weight of everything unsaid, everything that had been left unspoken for too long. “You…you need physical affection?” he whispered, almost as if testing the words on his own tongue, seeing how they felt.

Reid swallowed, his Adam’s apple bobbing as he processed your words. His mind was spinning, struggling to reconcile the warmth in your voice, the softness in your gaze, with the cold, distant reality he had been living in for the past two months. The reality where your hands no longer reached for his, where your voice had lost that teasing lilt whenever you spoke to him, where you had looked at him with something closer to exhaustion than love. But now, now, you were here, in front of him, looking at him like this, touching him like this, speaking to him like this. And he didn’t know what to do with it.

His fingers twitched against yours, but he didn’t pull away. He couldn’t. Not when you were looking at him with that quiet plea in your eyes, not when your touch was so familiar, achingly so.

“You need physical affection?” He repeated it, almost as if saying it aloud would help him believe it. “From me?”

A small frown creased your forehead, as if the question itself was absurd. “Of course, from you,” you murmured, your thumb tracing the back of his hand in a slow, lingering movement. “Who else would I want it from, if not my future husband?”

Spencer’s mouth opened as if to speak, then faltered, the words caught somewhere in the space between his thoughts and reality. For a brief moment, everything clicked. It all made sense now.

You didn’t remember more than the accident.

You didn’t remember the nights you had spent on opposite ends of the apartment, the silences that stretched longer than either of you could fill. You didn’t remember the fights that had grown from whispered frustrations into full-blown arguments, the sharp words that had cut deeper than either of you had intended. You didn’t remember the moment you had taken off your engagement ring, the way you had placed it on the counter with trembling fingers, saying, I don’t know if this is working anymore, Spence. You didn’t remember that you had been on the verge of leaving him.

And yet now, here you were, lying in a hospital bed, looking up at him with those same eyes that once held every piece of his heart, asking for him. Asking for his love, his touch, his kiss, as if none of it had ever been broken. As if nothing had changed.

His chest ached.

He should tell you. He should tell you the truth. He should remind you of the distance that had grown between you, the hurt that had seeped into every corner of what you once were. He should remind you that you had been slipping through his fingers for two months now, that this moment, this closeness, was something neither of you had shared in what felt like forever.

But God, how could he? How could he break this? How could he take away the way you were looking at him, touching him, and loving him when it was the only thing he had wanted for so long?

You smiled softly, a small, teasing glint in your eyes, the same expression he had missed more than he could admit. “I don’t need another doctor,” you said, your voice light but filled with need. “I just need my doctor Reid. I need you now.”

His breath caught.

God, how many nights had he stayed awake, staring at the ceiling, wishing to hear those words again? How many times had he replayed every conversation, every argument, trying to pinpoint the exact moment everything had started slipping through his fingers? How many times had he wished you’d look at him like this again, like he was your home?

“Do you…” He hesitated, then swallowed. “Do you remember the last thing we talked about? Before the accident?”

You blinked at him, momentarily thrown by the question. “No, I—” You paused, thinking. Then, after a moment, you laughed, rolling your eyes. “Probably something dumb, like what we should have for dinner.”

You didn’t remember. You didn’t remember the raw, biting argument that had escalated, the way words that were meant to heal had instead poisoned the air between you. The cutting words you had both thrown at each other, the ones that lingered long after you had left the apartment, your heart pounding with regret and pain. You didn’t remember that you had almost walked away for good.

But now? Right now, you were looking at him like he was still your safe place. Like he was still yours.

“I…” He inhaled sharply, trying to steady himself, the words lodged in his throat like shards of glass. “I don’t want to hurt you,” he murmured, his voice breaking with the weight of his own uncertainty.

“You’re not hurting me.” You let out a small, breathy chuckle, squeezing his hand. “The only thing hurting me right now is this damn headache.”

Spencer exhaled, closing his eyes for a moment. This was dangerous. This was reckless. He knew that. But when he opened his eyes again and saw you, saw the way you were still waiting, still trusting, still his, something in him cracked.

Slowly, hesitantly, his free hand lifted, fingertips grazing the side of your face. You leaned into his touch instantly, and he felt his heart stutter, his breath catching in his throat.

God.

How could he let go of this?

His grip on your face tightened slightly, barely noticeable, but you still felt it. Your expression softened, your thumb grazing over his knuckles, grounding him. “Spence?”

He inhaled sharply, trying to push back the lump in his throat. He should tell you. He needed to tell you. But the words wouldn’t come. Because right now, in this moment, you were still his. You were looking at him like he was your everything. Like you wanted him.

And selfishly, pathetically, he wanted to hold onto that. Just for a little longer.

So instead of answering your question, instead of pulling away like he probably should have, he did the one thing he knew he shouldn’t do.

He gave in.

He leaned forward, his movements slow, hesitant, his fingers tightening around yours. His free hand came up to cradle your face, his thumb brushing gently against your cheek, as if memorizing the warmth of your skin. And when your lips parted slightly, your breath mixing with his, he closed the space between you and kissed you.

Soft. Tentative.

A kiss that held every unsaid word, every unshed tear, every moment he thought he had lost you for good. It wasn’t hurried or desperate. It was slow, tentative, almost like he was afraid you would pull away, that you would remember everything you had wanted to forget. But you didn’t. You melted into him, sighing against his lips, your fingers curling around the fabric of his sleeve, holding him close.

For the first time in months, Spencer Reid didn’t feel like he was losing you. For the first time in months, he allowed himself to believe, just for a fleeting moment, that maybe he hadn’t lost you at all.

#criminal minds #criminal minds fanfiction #criminal minds x reader #spencer reid #spencer reid x reader #spencer reid x fem!reader #spencer reid imagine #spencer reid x fanfiction #spencer reid x you #spencer reid angst #matthew gray gubler #mon’s fics ♡

429 notes · View notes

empty-vessel-of-a-person · 8 months ago

Text

Reasons Why Zayne and MC is now being labeled as "Husband and Wife"

Note: Just my opinion. Not intend to compare with other LaDS men. Just general observation on how Zayne and MC act with each other which makes them like a Husband and Wife.

It is a canon from the main timeline of the game that they do accompany each other on business trips and M/C willingly and even volunteered herself to go with Zayne.

They are constantly in touch aside from the time MC go to N109 zone. She never tell Zayne about it.

When MC thought she is about to die in N109 Zone, she thinks of Zayne. Zayne was the only other LaDS men that was mentioned in Long-Awaited Revelry.

The Akso Hospital Staff, Captain Jenna, Captain , and Carter all knew about them.

In Wander in Wonder event, they so natural in doing stuff. It naturally come to them to do things as a team. While Zayne carve the Jade Pendant, MC works to provide food and earn them enough money to buy the jade. They don't even have to talk about it. This is why I love Zayne.

He is never a hard ass guy with "I will do everything" mentality. In his eyes, they are always a team. Even though I feel that he have much say to their relationship, he let MC do what she can for them. He doesn't take MC's individuality and right to do what she wants and he guides her instead.

In there messages/phone call/memory post, MC is almost always the one to look out for Zayne. She knows that they are both busy and she always do what she can to take care of her and he do the exact the same. I was squealing to that one where they nap together, Zayne is overflowing love for MC.

In Moonlit Dream, he initiated the intimate moment with Zayne. Some might say that MC also initiate the intimate moment with Rafayel. But hear me out. With Rafayel "they are trying to convince the maids" outside the room about their relationship. I'm not saying that what they have is unreal, but with Zayne, she initiate and willingly give herself to him. Same goes in Hidden Motive when MC willingly sits on Zayne's lap.

In Doomsday memory with Zayne, they are so deep in relationship that they are already doing groceries together. And I am kicking myself because Zayne suggested that kissing will be their everyday thing.. OMFGosh!!! This man gone from cold to hot! His character development is so subtle that even I was shock but thrilled with our progress with him.

Magnificent!

And lastly, while Zayne is not fond of MC talking with his male colleague to much, he still let her socialize with them. He isn't the type to be impolite with everyone that talk MC. He even let her plan a not so surprise party for him with his colleague. This is such a huge progress for Zayne since he prefer to be left alone.

Won't you love a guy that was ready to compromise with everything with you just to keep you happy?

#love and deepspace #zayne #zayne love and deepspace #lnds zayne #zayne lads #zayne l&ds #dr zayne #zayne x mc #lads zayne x reader #zayne x y/n #zayne x you #zayne x reader

935 notes · View notes

idlerin · 1 year ago

Text

EACH WORD FELL INTO PLACE

celebrity!akaashi keiji x f!reader

part 1 | part 2 | part 3

the ikarus incident (band au)

+ word count: 8.6k

content — best friend's brother/sister's best friend trope, established relationship (in the other fics especially, this one eventually), can be read as a stand-alone ig, very fluffy hihi enjoy! (i certainly enjoyed writing it)

to love and be loved by akaashi keiji, a treasure not many get to behold.

AKAASHI KEIJI never thought he would be the type to experience the kind of love that was heart-racing, mind-clouding, immense, and overflowing. A love that makes you lose all sensibility and makes you ponder on how to function like a proper human being. Such acts included breathing normally, blinking in the usual manner, and even thinking when the person beholding the affection is near. The kind of love that existed and repeated in countless romance novels, movies, and shows. Fictional. Unreal. Untrue. It’s not like he was much of a pessimist to think that he would never find love, more like, it was unbelievable for that kind of love to exist in reality as it frankly didn’t make any sense. How could someone lose all rationality because of one single person?

Keiji could vaguely remember his father talking about the day he met his mother, how, when he first saw her it felt as if he was shot in the heart. Not by an arrow, but by a bullet. How he was hit with a myriad of emotions, love and adoration above all. A burning sensation settled in and what left was the thought of needing to get to know their mother more, absolutely sure she was the one for him.

Keiji simply didn’t get it though, at the ripe age of ten, he didn't understand how a person could fall in love with someone they didn’t know well (which is why he thinks the notion of falling in love at first sight is impossible, you can feel attraction at first sight but surely not love). He soon discovered that love could sprout differently for people. His aunt and uncle for one fell in love after years of being friends, it didn’t hit them immediately that their bond would turn into something more and yet it did. His uncle described it as one day seeing the sun shine high up in the sky and realizing how bright it makes the world.

The blinding kind of love was simply one of the many ways people express their affection for one another. In the end, he concluded that the heart-racing, mind-clouding, immense, and overflowing kind of love wasn’t something he would ever be subjected to.

He grew curious about the subjectivity in an objective reality, this curiosity turned into an interest in writing. Which then turned into an interest in poetry and eventually, lyricism. He had found a love for literature that young kids usually don’t, this then had been a turning point in his life that wasn't abrupt but impactful, who knew rummaging in the attic looking for his nana’s old books would lead him to discover an abandoned guitar?

Just like his view on love and everything else, music was something that slowly but surely made its way into his heart. A passion begins to thread and twine to the fate directing his life.

And then he was hit by a bullet.

Unlike his father, it didn’t come abruptly and immensely after he laid eyes on you. It was slower, gradual, and not anything he expected at all. He’s known you for years, being his little sister’s closest friend. You were a constant presence in his home and you were even there to listen to his band when they were merely four kids having fun and following a dream. You were always the sweet type, and it blended well with his sister’s fierce attitude. Along the way he started thinking of you as a friend too, he could confide in you and you both shared easy conversations, how could you not be friends? You practically spent every single day in his house, you were more familiar than some of his cousins.

“I just want to graduate, why is this so hard?” you whine, a pout befalling your face, “Keiji, I swear you explained it really well, maybe something’s wrong with my brain!” your eyes were wide, looking at him as if you were truly worried something was wrong with you. It was one of the many days you spent in his home, and he offered to help when he noticed you kept glaring at a piece of paper on the counter. He asked where his sister was and you said that she was taking a nap, but you couldn’t give yourself the same pleasure without finishing your worksheet.

“Maybe you need to take a break for a moment,” he suggests, smiling idly at your expression. The pout didn’t rest and he reached out to pat you gently on the head, something he got used to doing. It’s not like he saw you as a child—he was only a year and a half older—but he could never help patting your head whenever you acted in such a cute manner.

“What will that do?” your shoulders loosen and you look up at him prettily under your lashes. That’s when Keiji becomes speechless for a moment, your gaze pierces through him and he doesn't hear what you said at first. He hadn’t noticed that he’d been staring for too long, you had to get him back to his senses by uttering, “Keiji?”

“Yes? I–uhm right uh, rest will give you the energy you need to process new information easily,” Keiji suddenly felt the need to stand up, so he did. You were pretty, yes, that’s not anything new. You’ve always been pretty in his eyes so why is it that he’s now acting so weirdly about it? He’s long since acknowledged that you’re pleasing to look at. Yes. So what? Right. He didn’t get to ponder much on that afternoon because he was soon bombarded with work when his band got scouted by an agent, he had rehearsals to worry about and people to impress. Plus, you’d always be there, so he doesn’t need to rush and put a name on anything.

Budding feelings they may be. Keiji didn't know exactly what it was, but he wasn't dumb to not have a hint to what's happening to him. He just didn't let himself be too caught up in it.

Your presence in the Akaashis' lives was so prominent that you were even invited to family gatherings. His aunts, uncles, and cousins became as familiar with you as a regular family member would. He was so used to your presence on trips as well, his mother treated you as her own and his sister was more than happy to have her best friend on their outings.

“Is [name] not joining?” he found himself asking when he was carrying his bags to the car, his family and him were on their way to a beach trip and naturally, he looked for you. He just got back after weeks of juggling his second year of college and his band. His family greeted him with a resort getaway to “ease him up a bit” according to his sister who also just got home from her first year in university.

His father started laughing and Keiji was confused as to what was so hilarious, his father didn’t leave him wondering for too long, “Glad to know you were also used to her being here!” and laughed more as if this was the funniest discovery in the world.

“Dear, what’s so funny? Is it not obvious Keiji thinks of [name] as a sister as well? Of course he’d look for her,” his mom shook her head at his dad, “Now stop laughing and get the other bags, I’m too tired to walk back in.”

A sister? His mom thinks he thought of you as a sister? That was… he has never entertained the idea. You were always just you. No matter how much he thought about it, he could just never see you as a sister.

“Why is [name] not coming?” he could not take not knowing the reason and asked Kaiya who was looking like she was trying to bury herself in her hoodie.

“Because she's busy,” Kaiya shrugged, bringing out her phone and leaning on the car.

Busy? It was summer, you’re supposed to have fun during summer. Even he (someone who is dedicated to upholding responsibilities even during summer break) is taking time for leisure because it’s summer. What could you possibly be busy with that would make you unable to come and enjoy a getaway? Why wasn’t his sister reacting more to this? Usually, Kaiya would be the one most sulky about not being able to bring you along with us despite her grown age. Was Keiji the only one finding your no-show bothering?

“You’re not whining about not seeing her? You’re all grown up,” Keiji smiles, trying to get a reaction out of his sister.

“Of course I’m all grown up! Don’t act like you’re that much older than me,” Kaiya glares, “And I see [name] almost every day, I’ll see her after the trip,” she stuck her tongue out as if taunting. She smirked right after and Keiji had his suspicions that Kaiya must be trying to get something out of him as well. They think too alike, he adores his sister but he'd rather she not pry much right now when he's distraught and trying to compose himself because it shouldn't be too obvious that he's feeling distraught.

Kaiya could see you whenever she wanted, you went to the same university and lived on campus together. Somehow that gave him a bad feeling in his stomach, the reason is not that his sister specifically spends more time with you—that's a given because of your years of friendship—but because he couldn't spend much time with you. There was a clear difference.

He was feeling strange again, it was still a strange and unfamiliar feeling despite him not exactly being single his whole life. After months of being away for college and work, going home included seeing you and now that he doesn’t get to do exactly that is making him feel drowsy. He thought that he could sidetrack himself from further developing these feelings of his but it didn't work (he entertained a few people the past year because he was trying to get you off his mind—which was no use, you were always there and will always be there). Sometimes he'd think of you and he'd have the urge to message you (he gives in to his desire to talk to you most of the time), or sometimes he would look at old photos of you two—which was not much.

There was a time in the middle of band practice where he kept staring off into space because he remembered a time where you asked him to teach you how to play a few chords on a guitar and he remembered the way you laughed and how your skin felt when he was arranging your fingers on the strings properly. They had to start over and over on practicing a song because Keiji kept misremembering lines when the thought of you was making him flustered. Even Atsumu had started asking him if he would be alright performing for the gig they booked the following night. That was only one of the many instances you clouded his thoughts.

This feeling was driving him insane.

He took a deep breath to control himself because the thought of missing you was eating him away. He wanted to see you. You’ve exchanged texts and some calls over the past months but it wasn’t enough, you were one of the reasons he was looking forward to coming back home and he foolishly thought he would get to see you eventually because you’d always be there.

He’d like to take it back, it wasn’t like getting hit by a bullet per se, Keiji would equate it more to poison. The kind that slowly seeped in and made it so that it was difficult to breathe. To function. Keiji sighed and resigned himself to the irony that he was slowly ticking the boxes of the criteria that made him believe he was otherwise susceptible to the kind of blinding affection one could have towards someone.

Keiji didn’t know when exactly he entered the car, the whole journey sure felt enlightening with the way he could finally put a name to his actions towards you. He really couldn’t take it anymore and messaged you, asking why you couldn’t join the trip. It was better to hear it from you, and it also eased him a bit. Perhaps in a while, he could bring up meeting with you over the next weeks, that wouldn’t be too strange.

Fate was on his side and he got his wish of seeing you more frequently during summer break. You agreed to hang out with him and you spent it by usually going to the theaters, a museum, or simply eating out. He didn’t mind what you guys would do, he enjoyed even just passing by stores with you. Whenever Kaiya and you would hang out, you would drop by which would lead to conversations in the living room while waiting for his sister to get ready (Keiji knew his sister was also using him for a free ride but it’s not like he would complain since it means more time with you). The last week of the break was his sister’s birthday and he had enjoyed picking out gifts for her with your guidance, it did make him feel a bit empty knowing he’d have to spend months without being with you again.

Despite all his worries, he remained focused on the present. Him, Kaiya, you, and a few other of his cousins were splayed in a circle in the living room of the villa where Kaiya’s birthday was celebrated, playing a game of truth or dare. Keiji watched as Kaiya spun the bottle and as its momentum slowed, the tip of the bottle pointed at his cousin Hiroki.

A mischievous grin spread on Kaiya’s lips, she glanced once at you then back at Hiroki, “So, who would you say is your type? Answer honestly! It’s my birthday,” she slurred her words, the alcohol kicking in. If she couldn’t have been more obvious, she started clinging to you.

Hiroki looked like a deer in headlights, glancing at his sister Aiki beside him and narrowed his eyes at her, “You told her?”

“I did no such thing, you’re just too obvious,” Aiki stirred her glass of wine and winked at you whose smile was a bit strained, Keiji could tell you were starting to feel awkward. Are they trying to set you and Hiroki up? Keiji could easily put two and two together with how his cousins and sister were acting right now. He was a bit frustrated that he could only be a bystander along with his other cousins and a few of Kaiya’s other close friends, he was trying to suppress the urge to interfere.

“Answer now!” Kaiya pressed, shaking your arm while pointing a finger at Hiroki.

Keiji could only look at you. How would you react? Would you like that Hiroki feels that way about you? Keiji found himself clutching his drink. Would your cheeks warm? Would you feel light and fluttery? Would you feel the same way about Hiroki? Keiji was only giving himself pain with his train of thought.

Hiroki then quickly drank a shot of alcohol for liquid courage, “Fine, my ideal type is [name],” Hiroki then looked everywhere but you after exclaiming that to everyone in the room. The people around cheered and most started teasing you too.

Keiji locked eyes with you, he tilted his head as if asking a question, and of course, the only question coming to mind now was ‘What do you feel about Hiroki?’. It was how you felt that mattered the most rather than his disdain for the situation. Hiroki was nice enough, but surely you didn’t know each other that well for you to harbor any feelings for his cousin. What if you did? You knew of his cousin’s existence and saw him a lot (not enough). What if Keiji never realized you already had long-term feelings for someone else because he never liked to entertain the idea of you liking someone who wasn't him?

Keiji wanted to bang his head on the wall right now. He was thinking irrationally, but being selfish was natural because he liked you, right? It was okay that he was feeling like he wanted to grab your hand and run away to a place where it could just be you and him. He never tried asking you if you currently liked anyone so he could continue to live in the fantasy of the possibility that you liked him back.

You only blinked at him before you were distracted by his sister hovering over you and saying nonsense Keiji didn’t bother to listen to. It was getting very obvious that you wanted to escape the conversation, Keiji noticed how you fiddled with your shirt and the way your eyes kept wandering to the door. Keiji took it upon himself to pull his sister away from you, “Stop it, you’re making [name] and Hiroki uncomfortable.”

His sister looked up at him with an accusing gaze, “You!”

“Yes?” he successfully pried her away from you which earned him a small smile, the simple action from you felt as if a weight was removed from his shoulders.

“Stop taking my best friend away from me!” Kaiya states as Keiji lets her go, stomping back to her place beside you.

“What do you mean?” Keiji was honestly confused about what Kaiya meant, he would not be sorry if ever that would be the actual case though.

“Don’t you think I don’t know about you two hanging out without me!” Kaiya exclaimed, ah so that’s what she meant and here Keiji thought she had a hint about his feelings towards you, or perhaps she does? But Kaiya was too drunk right now to think coherently.

“Everyone knows Keiji actually has two sisters,” Aiki laughs, giving Keiji that distraught feeling once again. Does everyone in his family think Keiji treats you like a sister? Or do they think he could never feel that way about you? Why? What can he do to make them stop thinking like that? What if you thought you were like a sister to him? Keiji could feel nothing but panic.

Later that night Keiji found you alone out in the gardens of the villa, it looks like he wasn’t the only one who had a hard time sleeping.

“Can’t sleep?” he calls out, startling you. You turn to him with your shawl wrapped tightly around your shoulders, you visibly relax when you see that it was just him.

A smile spread on your face, “Yeah, you too?”

Keiji nodded and watched as you sat on the bench, he walked towards you and leaned on the tree beside it. He wouldn’t be able to think of the right words to say if he was sitting right next to you, he was still hung up on what happened earlier this evening.

“So… I have to get back to campus the day after tomorrow,” you broke the silence, sighing after you laid out your news.

“Ah,” was the only thing Akaashi could say to the reminder that your time together was limited, “I’m leaving the same day, the weeks sure went by fast.”

That’s not what he really wanted to say though, he wanted to question you about what you felt when Hiroki practically said he liked you. Keiji wanted to know if you would be alright with seeing him again in the near future, you didn’t have to waste money on commuting, he could drive to you. Perhaps you could even attend some of his gigs, it would be exhilarating to see you watch him again. He wanted to say a lot of things to you but the only thing he could say was, “I don’t think of you like a sister.”

“Huh?” you looked up at him under your lashes, the moonlight set its rays upon you and it was similar to that moment in his kitchen a year ago. The moment that made him realize he was feeling for you deeper than he should.

“I wanted to clarify that I don’t think of you as a sister, everyone seems to get the wrong idea,” Keiji took a deep breath, he was so near to telling the truth that he was finding it difficult to breathe again. He was staring right into you and if the truth didn’t spill from his lips, he wondered if you could see it in his eyes, “They were right about one thing though.”

As if hypnotized, you stayed in place as Akaashi couldn’t restrain himself anymore and reached for your hand, catching it firmly in his grasp, “You mean a lot to me.”

“I… you mean a lot to me too, Keiji,” those words that came from your sweet voice was similar to harmony in his ears, it brought out an overwhelming feeling in his chest and he wanted nothing more than to be close to you. He can’t do that yet though, it’s not the right time.

Akaashi Keiji never thought he would experience the kind of love that was heart-racing, mind-clouding, immense, and overflowing, but he was wrong. Every moment spent with you proved it wrong, what else could explain the loss of sense and rationality whenever you were near? But he was still him after all. So he would approach this in the only way he knows, slowly but surely. You were worth it after all.

That’s why it didn’t matter how long it took for him to profess his love for you, he needs to make sure that he’s shown you that his love deserves to be reciprocated. That he deserves someone as precious as you.

It was never easy, he never expected that it would just be easy. Yet the day came when he held your hand tightly in his once again, his nerves barely being suppressed as he told you the reason for his years of pining. How he liked you, he liked you so much he could barely remember how he was before harboring feelings for you. It was blissful, it couldn’t be anything else but. He could finally be with you, after all, he had the right to be with you and it made him extremely happy. He would always be caught grinning to himself, it was to the point that Suna started asking him if he was alright because of his weird behavior. Akaashi wanted nothing more than to show you off to the world.

Although, a certain request from you made it difficult to do just that. You had asked him if you both could keep your relationship a secret because of his growing fame and you didn’t want to be caught up in that world of his. He respected your decision and was willing to follow whatever you said. Your relationship lasted for many hours, days, and months. Even if he couldn’t spend a lot of time with you in the later years because of his job and there were rough times that occurred, his love for you outweighed. His resolve remained, that it didn’t matter how much time has or will pass, his love for you would never waver.

His heart felt as if it was pumping a hundred and twenty beats per minute, a single text from you got this reaction out of him. Even with years of being together, he could still never function normally around you. He had just gotten a text in the middle of his post-concert celebratory party with his bandmates and some of the other staff. It was a simple text—two words, six letters.

My Love 2:44 AM I’m here :) [insert picture of hotel lobby]

The familiar lobby of the hotel they were staying in for the week was clear in the picture. Akaashi was speechless, how could you be here? Was he dreaming? It was a thousand miles away from home but you’re here? For him? You were here for him?

He couldn’t leave his seat fast enough.

“Where are you going?” Sakusa asks. Akaashi didn’t think anyone would take notice if he suddenly left, but this was Sakusa here, he was simple enough to brush off, Atsumu would be more meddlesome.

“Hotel,” Akaashi started moving before he could be asked to elaborate, he couldn’t wait to see you already. He hurriedly put his cap on and passed by Sakusa once again.

“Hey, you’re still holding your dri–” Akaashi didn’t stay to hear the rest, he was feeling restless at the thought of you patiently waiting for him. He was out of the doors of the private room within minutes.

“Akaashi-san!” a hand was on his shoulder. Why does the world despise him at this very moment? He looked around and spotted Suna’s assistant. He should be glad that at least it wasn’t a fan, he loved his fans dearly but they would be more difficult to bypass. Turns out she was looking for Suna himself and couldn’t find the room. Akaashi quickly led her to the right place before rushing out again, he then realized he was still holding onto a drink and quickly left that on a counter. He should be walking faster so nothing else would stand in the way of him wrapping his arms around you and feeling your warmth after so many months of longing.

He was practically running towards his car, luckily he was still sane enough to drive properly. You would scold him for being reckless while driving, it was good that the hotel was only a few minutes away. Though it was a very agonizing ten minutes, the world was testing out his patience.

Finally, finally, he was in front of the doors which were the only thing separating him from you.

Once he gets inside, he sets his gaze on you immediately. Your shining eyes met his and you stood up from your seat, he hadn’t had a care in the world as he practically ran towards you and pulled you into an embrace. He should be thinking if his actions would earn him a trending article but he couldn’t find himself to care. The world will find out sooner or later how much you mean to him. He buried his face in your hair and hugged you impossibly tighter.

“Love, It’s a bit hard to breathe,” you pat him on his back, he can feel your grin on his shoulder.

“That’s exactly how I felt when you sent me that text message,” Keiji replies, hand clutching the back of your head, soaking in the reality that you’re actually here with him.

You fake a gasp, “So I deserve this?”

Akaashi gave a hum as a ‘yes’, “You deserve to be smothered with much more affection too,” he kissed the side of your head.

“Save that for later, please,” you say, warily looking at your surroundings, only the receptionist turning a blind eye was present.

He wastes no time and hesitantly lets you go in order to gather your suitcase, he intertwines your hand with his free hand. He leads you to the elevator and impatiently pushes the button to his floor. You, on the other hand, were leaning on his biceps as your eyes kept fluttering shut due to drowsiness from your flight. You left for your flight immediately after getting off work and you were tired from the hecticness.

Once you both arrived at Akaashi’s room, he spent no less than a minute putting things like his car keys and your suitcase away before pulling you towards the bedroom. He sat you down on the mattress and you had no time to protest (not like you would) before he placed all of his weight above you. With your back to the softness of the silky cover, you contentedly hummed and closed your eyes for a brief moment, “I need to change.”

“Five minutes,” Keiji then begins to caress your arms and bury his head on your chest, breathing you in once more.

Your hands fled to his hair, massaging the strands of raven and kissing the crown of his head, “I’ll only be staying for three days.”

A sound similar to a groan escaped from his throat, “That’s too soon.”

“I have a job too,” you laugh, “I was lucky enough to exchange with one of my coworkers so I could leave this weekend.”

“I miss you already,” Keiji practically whines, unlike his usual character.

“Don’t miss me while I’m still here,” you tugged at some of the strands on the back of his head, “And we’ll see each other again in three weeks, remember?” pertaining to their band’s final concert being held back in Japan, you would be watching the show alongside his family—who still don’t know about your relationship, the both of you have been having a difficult time bringing it up.

“Three weeks too long,” Keiji finally rose from half-suffocating you with his weight and instead started to look for clothes he could give you to change into, “You must be exhausted.”

“I’m not the one flying from country to country and performing for almost three hours every night,” you sat on the bed, using your elbows as support as you watched him shuffle through his luggage.

“Not every night,” Keiji comments before rising and handing you his clothes which you placed on your lap. He stood between your legs and used a hand to tilt your head up towards him, he was looking at you so intensely.

“Are you drunk?” you ask, squinting your eyes at him as you now only realize the slight haziness in his gaze. You knew he was in a mini celebration an hour before being here, but he said he hadn’t planned on drinking, “And you drove here?”

Keiji shook his head, drunk on you, possibly, “I barely had a glass, just to entertain the staff. I drove here safely, I swear.”

“You better have,” you give one more pointed look at him before falling back on the bed, you close your eyes. You were getting heavy-eyed, soon, sleep will win you over.

“You’re the one who said you had to change, only a few minutes have passed,” Akaashi chides you.

You groaned and opened one of your eyes and raised an arm, “Do it for me.”

Akaashi raised a brow, you were getting into one of your moods he was all too familiar with. Who was he to deny your request? He pulled you up to a sitting position once again, his hands on the hem of your shirt. Before he pulled it off you, he glanced up only to see you smiling languidly at him, “You love me so much,” you begin to tease.

“I do,” Keiji smiles softly at you.

“Hey.”

“Hey!”

“Hello! Attention to [l/n] [name].”

You look at Kaiya who has been trying to get your attention for the past minute, “Sorry?” you give her a sheepish smile, your thoughts were on the mini-vacation you let yourself have with Akaashi a month ago. You spent the past thirty minutes or so letting her family simply drag you around because you were distracted by the crowd at Ikarus’ concert. You were waiting outside because Keiji’s mother wanted to fall in line and buy merch. Kaiya complained that they could just ask Keiji for the items she wanted but her mother shushed her saying that wasn’t as authentic. Keiji’s mom was set on having the “full fan experience”.

“Why are you so dazed?” she tilted her head to the side, which awfully reminded you of Keiji (you started missing him even more). “Because you’re seeing my brother?” Kaiya scrunched up her face and made a gagging sound, “Did you not just see him a few weeks ago?”

You started looking around, sighing in relief when you saw that Akaashi’s father was with his wife, “Watch what you say,” you pouted.

Kaiya glanced at where you were looking, “When are you planning to tell them?”

“Soon,” you shrugged, you admit you were still nervous about telling them about your long-term relationship with their son. It’s been years and you know it’s been long overdue, you were ready to face the backlash that would come with hiding your relationship from them for so long.

Kaiya shook her head at you and then proceeded to take something out of her purse, she laid out the card attached to a lanyard to you, “Before I forget, your backstage pass,” you took it from her gratefully. The glossy surface of the card hits the rays of the sun, and you observe the words ‘All Access’ shown under the band’s logo. It wasn’t the first time you’ve gone to his concerts so you were already familiar with the processes, you were even friendly with some of the staff.

“You girls go on ahead, it’s a bit hot and your mother is going to take a while,” Akaashi’s father jogs to you both and nudges Kaiya to go, “She’s raving on and on about having to get that mini version of Keiji and I admit I kind of want to get that version of their album with lots of little things inside too, I want to test out my luck and see if I could get your brother’s picture on a first try—you know those little cardboards with pictures right?”

“So you would rather see him in pictures rather than going inside and meeting the real deal?” Kaiya comments.

“Yes, now go,” Akaashi’s father smiles at you before running back to Mrs. Akaashi.

“Oh, whatever, let’s go,” Kaiya saunters to the arena as if she owned the place and you trailed behind her looking at the crowds of people waiting outside, the concert wasn’t starting in another three hours yet there were already tons who were in line. You kind of felt a bit bad because you could just go inside without any worries. These were people who adored the man you were lucky enough to call your boyfriend, not as much as you—you like to believe, no one knows and loves him more than you—but that was your more selfish side talking.

“Kaiya, do you even remember where the common room is?” you asked, your memory and sense of direction weren't well. The last time you went here was their opening concert which was over a year ago.

“Uh, no, but we’ll see someone we know soon,” Kaiya was confident, walking in a straight direction as if she knew where she was going. A bunch of the crew arranging lights and holding boxes were walking around but no faces you were familiar with. It wasn’t long before we were blocked by guards on the way to a segregated part of the building.

“Are you looking for the green room?” the guard asked, eyeing your passes and affirming that you were actually allowed to be here but the both of you clearly looked lost. Kaiya kept looking around, you thought she was acting suspicious (and the guard must think so too) so you grabbed her wrist to make her focus.

“I’m looking for my brother,” Kaiya took out her phone. You wanted to just ask the guard nicely to direct you guys to the waiting room.

“And your brother is…?” The guard looked like they wanted to get this over with too.

“Akaashi Keiji,” Kaiya looked up from her phone, “He said we should go to the dressing rooms,” she pointed at her device. You do not recall Keiji saying any of that, he hasn’t opened his phone in a while, he usually doesn’t use it hours before a performance to focus. You looked at Kaiya, wondering what she was planning up her sleeves.

“Kaiya-san? [name]-san?” a soft-spoken voice interrupted, the both of you turned to see Rika, Sakusa’s personal assistant if you remembered correctly. The familiar face came to you both when you needed it, “Are you guys looking for Akaashi-san? You can follow me. I'm on the way there because my cousin needs his coffee to calm his pre-show nerves,” she rolled her eyes.

Rika nodded at the guard who let her and you both through, you smiled at them before following Rika.

“How are you, Rika-san?” you asked, taking one of her bags to carry it for her since she was holding coffee and a folder with her.

“Been better, my cousin’s being a huge headache to me because of… some things,” she shook her head as if she was shouldering the world's heaviest burdens, “How are you and Akaashi-san?”

“I’m fine—wait, what?” that caught you off-guard, it made you halt in your tracks.

“Uhm… was I wrong? Are you both not in a relationship? Kiyoomi thought you were together as well,” Rika started walking again and soon you saw more people in the hallways.

Kaiya began to cackle, “Aha! I told you it was obvious.”

“You’re not wrong, Rika-san but uhm is it really that obvious?” you start to heat up, your cheeks suddenly feeling warm.

“Well, he always has his eyes on you whenever you two are in the same room and after observing your interactions for the past years that’s what I concluded. If it’s a secret, I’m sure a lot of people don’t have a clue, this lot isn’t very observant after all,” Rika shrugged, “Anyways! This is the main sitting area, further back are the dressing rooms. The guys just got ready so they must be just lounging around somewhere alone, they’re all doing their pre-show rituals most likely.”

The both of you thanked Rika and you handed her bag back as she went on ahead mumbling about having to practically play hide and seek with how difficult Sakusa would be to find. Kaiya linked her arm with yours and dragged you once again to find the dressing room with Keiji’s name on it.

Once you both were in front of the door, Kaiya began her incessant knocking that is sure to give Keiji confusion and a headache all at once knowing his staff would never make such a ruckus, “I have a delivery for an Akaashi Keiji,” she was snickering in between her words while you shook your head at her antics.

It wasn’t long before the door opened and you were greeted with the sight of Keiji ladled with accessories he wouldn’t usually put on in day-to-day life, such as stud earrings you were really liking the look of. You looked up at him only to see his eyes which were decorated with a brownish hue on the lids that were already on yours. Perhaps Rika did have a point.

“[name],” he said breathlessly and was already holding your free hand that wasn’t being clutched by the other Akaashi on your side.

“I’m here too! You’re welcome!” Kaiya exclaimed, pulling you back so Keiji wouldn’t successfully get a hold of you.

“Hi Kaiya,” Keiji smiled at his sister, still not letting go of you too. Kaiya eyed that action and then looked up at her older brother who was looking at her blankly. Kaiya and you could both tell that Keiji was trying to tell her sister to leave, you were holding back your full-on grin.

“I accept thanks in the form of cash,” Kaiya patted your forearm before pushing you towards Keiji’s chest, the latter caught you in time and pulled you closer.

“Check your account after the show,” was Keiji’s only reply before bringing you inside and shutting the door.

“I feel as if your relationship has been turning transactional over the years,” you comment, finally letting out your laugh at the siblings’ antics. Kaiya meant well, of course, the monetary things were just a bonus. You looked around the room, spotting a guitar in the middle of the room and the mirrors on the walls which immediately caught your eye. A black settee was against the wall and a small glass table was on the side.

“I think she still holds a grudge against me for ‘taking you away’,” Keiji raises a hand to tuck loose strands of your hair behind your ear, “Because I was never sorry about it.”

His words gave you that fluttery feeling in your stomach that you’ve learned to become used to whenever you were around him, “Poor Kaiya,” you reached out a hand to cup his cheek, he buried his face in your hand and placed a feather-light kiss on your palm.

Keiji talked to you with his eyes, it was a question and a request all at once. You bit your lower lip as you observed his plump, gloss-stained one's part. Suddenly, it was all too suffocating and difficult to breathe if you didn't lean your face against his and capture the oxygen you badly needed. It seems he was thinking the same thing because he started leaning closer to you as if the urge to be nearer couldn’t be subdued.

But before he could relieve both of your longings, you took a step back, blinking and urging your senses to come back to normal, “You just got ready,” the staff’s best interest in mind.

Akaashi tilted his head to the side, that hazy look back in his eyes, “It can be fixed,” he held both of your arms in his grasp, caressing them in a way to ease and comfort you.

“Your stylist will hate me,” you pointed out, yet you were engrossed with the way he pulled you towards the couch. You had a slight feeling you were being tricked in order for Akaashi to get what he wanted at this particular moment, which was the same thing you were depriving yourself of.

Keiji sat down and his hands went down to your upper leg and gently nudged so you followed down, the plush of your thighs settled on his. You internally scold yourself for giving in, he knows all of your weak points, one of them was how you could be easily distracted by him, “I’ll take the scolding, my love.”

Your arms were wrapped around his neck, you tugged on the hair on his nape as you let your breath tangle with his. He was intoxicating, did he know he was intoxicating? Your eyes fluttered to a close because you couldn’t take it anymore and pressed your lips against his, he let out a satisfied groan on the back of his throat. You took in the woody scent of his cologne, the silken texture of his hair, and the pillowy almost velvet feel of his lips on yours. You should really be thinking of the consequences of your actions and the amount of people who will be burdened after this ordeal, yet, right now you could only enjoy the searing heat of his skin igniting with yours.

You felt one of his hands that held a grip on your thighs climb to your waist, he tugged on the material of your shirt before sliding his hand underneath. It elicited a small gasp from you which he took as an opportunity to slip his tongue inside your mouth.

That was when your phone started to ring to an all too familiar tune, in a daze you pulled away from him, much to his opposition, “That’s Kaiya calling,” you say, leaning your forehead on his.

Akaashi took your phone out from your pocket before putting it on the side, “She can manage to wait for a few more seconds,” he said, placing soft kisses on your cheeks and eventually capturing your lips in his.

You laughed at his reasoning before losing yourself in him once again, his hand was splayed on your stomach, caressing your skin. He pulled away and pecked you on the lips once more before leaving a trail of kisses on your jaw. You feel his teeth nip on your skin and a shiver runs over your spine.

The sudden opening of the door and a shriek made you freeze.

“Oh my!”

“Agh, my eyes!”

Akaashi’s reflexes were faster and more alert as he flipped you over so he would be hiding you from the door, he knew how you would be feeling uncomfortable with eyes on you and you were grateful his first thought was to shield you from further embarrassment. You glanced at his state, his messy hair and the stain on his lips smudged. You took it upon yourself to start fixing his appearance by wiping the sides of his mouth since it was your fault.

Keiji started straightening his clothes and patting down his hair as you did the same before he faced his parents and sister. You looked over his shoulder to see his mother frozen and you winced. Your heart started to race and not in the nice way Keiji made you feel, Keiji noticed this change in your demeanor as well and you felt him place his hand on yours in an effort to calm you down.

“This was probably why Kaiya was calling you,” Keiji mumbled under his breath, it was an effort to make the atmosphere lighter for you. He gave you a small smile before urging you to stand up. Keiji faced his parents and his sister who were all standing by the door, Kaiya was exaggeratingly fanning their mother who still wasn’t moving, with your hand still in his, he claimed, “[name] and I are dating, we have been for a few years now.”

A brief silence went over the room and it felt like an eternity for you when it was actually just a few seconds. Keiji’s father broke the smothering quietness.

“I knew it! You owe me, honey,” his father said with a loud cackle, his hand splayed out to Keiji’s mother beside him, “I told you our son’s feelings for dear [name] weren’t one-sided!”

“No!” their mother unfroze and put her hands in her palms.

You and Keiji were confused, even Kaiya stilled from her place.

“You bet on this happening?” Keiji asked, pulling you closer to his side so your nerves would rest.

“No, my son, your mother thought that you and [name] weren’t dating yet and that you were only pining for her while I said you both were already in a relationship. I had faith in you, son, I knew you had a backbone,” his father laughed in delight once more and swung an arm over his mother’s shoulders.

“We saw a picture of [name] in your room when we stayed at your penthouse a few months ago,” his mother tried to explain, hitting his father on the chest.

You recalled that very picture, you were wearing a sundress and were in the middle of looking back when Keiji took the picture. You were laughing and clutching your beach hat over your head in an attempt to not let the wind carry it away with the breeze. When you first saw it displayed in his room, you complained that there were a lot of better pictures of you but Keiji rebutted that this was the first one he took of you looking at him and that’s why he cherished it the most.

“Guess you guys were all worried for nothing!” Kaiya found herself and backed away from her parents, “I’d like to say that I was the original person who knew by the way, and I kept it in for so long. Not that they weren’t obvious,”

Akaashi clearly felt how you were being restless, he bent down to whisper in your ear, “Are you okay, love?”

You rub your wrist as you look up at him, “Well I’m honestly feeling a bit mortified.”

“You guys should've locked the door,” Kaiya said in a sing-song tone, “Imagine how I feel? I did not push you in this room for that. How could I possibly know you’d jump each other the moment you were left alone? I always thought you guys were rated G!”

You feel your face heating up once again and Keiji scolding his sister, “Perhaps you should go and call your stylist,” you suggest, trying to save some of your dignity.

Keiji eyes his sister and she got the hint and shuffled her parents—who were still arguing—out the door. You knew this wasn’t the end of it and a lot of explaining will have to be given to his parents (they wouldn’t leave you guys alone otherwise). With your eyes on the door, Keiji tried taking your attention by softly turning your face towards his.

“How do you feel?” he asks, smiling warmly at you.

“It’s… nice that we don’t have to hide it anymore,” you pressed your forehead on his chest, “I’m still feeling shy though.”

Keiji wrapped his arms around you and placed a soft kiss on your forehead, “How much time do you need to recover?”

“A minute and more of your hugs perhaps?” you ask, burying your face more in his chest. You should be urging him to go to his stylist already, but it wouldn’t be bad to keep him for another minute or so.

“I’m sorry they found out in an… unconventional way,” with your head pressed against his chest you could feel the rumble of his voice, the deep and lulling sound helping you calm down.

“Okay, I think I’m okay now,” you tried stepping away but he held you in your place, “Why?”

“I still need to recharge,” Keiji engulfs you in his warmth once more, “After this, it’s no more alone time. I’d have to wait another eight hours for that, so I need to get my fill now.”

Another round of silence baited and the only thing you could hear was the steady beat of his heart, it made you smile. Quiet moments with him came few and far in-between but when they did come, it felt as if the whole world was on your side and everything would always be okay.

“You’re so good to me, Keiji,” your voice cracks in the way of your emotions.

He responds by embracing you impossibly tighter, “What do you think about living together?” he drops the question, “It’s just something I’ve been thinking over, we don’t have to rush or anything but I just wanted to know what you think.”

It wouldn’t be too odd of a question, you practically spent every waking moment together whenever you both had the chance. That included staying over at each other’s places and spending most of your time together indoors. He’d love to spend more days waking up next to you, whenever you were there he felt nothing but peace and he wouldn’t mind for that feeling to stay with him for the rest of his life. The cheers of the crowd were exhilarating but the silence spent with you was more fulfilling.

“I’d love that,” you say, standing on your tiptoes and placing a kiss on his cheek.

You looked up at him under your lashes and Keiji felt that rush of intensifying feelings coming over him, his hands came to cup both of your cheeks as he placed a quick kiss on the tip of your nose, “I’d like to know of your thoughts in another matter that’s been on my mind,” he said in a hoarse voice.

“What is it?” your tone was light and airy. A few minutes from now you’ll have to give way for his staff to get him ready for the world. Right now you’d like to keep him to yourself, the world can wait.

“What do you think about marriage?”

HEADLINE:

Ikarus’ lead vocalist Akaashi Keiji announces he’s married!

leia @keijisrealgf I WAS SIMPING FOR A MARRIED MAN????? 4:20 PM · Jun 23 20XX

pia @ikarusavedme not even a girlfriend or an engagement.. but MARRIAGE 4:18 PM · Jun 23 20XX

kei @menexceptikarus he always gave family man vibes not surprised ngl 4:27 PM · Jun 23 20XX

a/n — alright so i went a bit overboard with this one JWBDEJXBDN ill say this is for taking so long to conclude akaashi's story lmao

general taglist + @luvrsthrist @cherries4denki @cloud-lyy @misscaller06 @noideawhothatis @wolffmaiden @rivaiken @wooasecret @Eclecticlandmughoagie @nicerthanu @sukunasrealgf @ris-krispie @seiamor @electriclovei @leeknowsarchive @todorokiskitten @rory-cakes @sexyandcringe @rinheartshyunlix @wh0zumy2k @iluv-ace @xiakyo @sanaexus @clyches @noble-17

255 notes · View notes

onydung · 6 months ago

Text

Surreal Angel

Arthur Shelby x FemReader

Synopsis : Your acceptance is new and scary to him

Masterlist

GRAMMER NOT GOOD, DONT EAT ME

You are everything that he is not. Young, innocent, an angel, your hands are small and soft compared to his dirty and calloused ones. He doesnt believe even for a second you come from the same world as he.

Yet your naked body is in his bed, nestled in his blankets close to his chest for warmth. Your eyes closed, unburdened by nightmares. He has been with a lot of pretty girls before but none of them we're you.

None of them look up at him with admiration, with so much geniune love that he doesnt even know if he even deserved to be looked upon like this, it feels wrong. He has been searching for someone to truly accept him for who he is but now that he found you it feels surreal.

He tried his best to keep you at arms length, wanting you so badly but too afraid to ruin everything like he always do. Showing you only the parts of him where he is stable, taking to heart Tommy's advice and pushing everything out so you dont percive the darkest parts of him but he knows deep down it was futile. He blew up, not able to contain himself any longer when a poor unfortunate soul decided to mess with his family. You saw the carnage with your own eyes, the blood all over his face and hands, the manggled face of the man, and the broken pieces of his soul yet you didnt run or puke or shun him instead you cleaned him of the blood with nothing but a reassuring smile. It was both comforting and chilling at the same time. Were you really an angel? Were you also twisted like him to be able to stomach such carnage and still accept him with open arms?

Despite it all you are still here by his side, holding his bloody hands on yours proclaiming your love for him. Why do you love him? Why do you accept him when he knows he could easily do you the same way he did that man? All these questions in his mind and yet he could not say them to you. He needed you.

He had forgotten the sensation of his victim's mushy flesh the moment your lips touch. Soft and warm. Your touch was delicate like you were afraid to break him, tender and sweet he couldnt help but cry.

He deepens the kiss, holding your body close to him, laying you on his bed, hungry for more. Your sweet moans and whimpers flood his senses, he wants to drown in you, forgetting what he is, what he has done and believe that he deserve this. Deserve to be loved by you. Pumping into you and accepting your love until it overflows.

He doesn't want to fall asleep, afraid he might wake up and find you were never real in the first place. So he stays, no matter how unreal you are, he holds you close believing that he at least deserve to be loved at this moment.

#peaky blinders #peaky blinders fanfic #arthur shelby #arthur shelby fanfic #arthur shelby x reader #arthur shelby x y/n #this is a quick one

121 notes · View notes

starmocha · 18 days ago

Note

I know it's caleb's moment and i'm very happy for him and that kiss and I've rewatched that trailer a lot and i saw there's a bday fic with little pilot in the works and that made me very happy but I also saw that post you made about father's day blurbs with poll

WHAT DO YOU MEAN SNOWDROP WOULD BE ONE WEEK OLD DURING ZAYNE'S FIRST FATHER'S DAY?

THAT'S TINY

THAT'S TINY TINY

OMG THAT'S BRAND NEW

why would you share that with us? HOW DO I LIVE WITH THAT INFO NOW?????

omg zayne being a brand new dad and his son literally being a brand new being

this is too much, too cute

omg I love them so much maybe i'm being dramatic and overemotional but that's too precious just way too precious that big, dear, snowman deserves the world

😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭

Exactly.

You all have to suffer with this revelation with me!!! (•᷄- •᷅ ;)

It's so silly how the stars have aligned with this.

It started with an ask about the kiddos' star signs. I've decided Snowdrop feels like a Gemini to me, but specifically, he has to be a June Gemini, because all of the May Geminis I know IRL pisses me off lmaoooo

And then one night I woke up at 3am and just laid in bed with thoughts running in all directions at 100mph before I randomly calculated that Snowdrop could be conceived on Zayne's birthday (thus, the premise for the Snowdrop Conception Fic was born lol).

I don't want to have full control over choosing dates for the kiddos' birthdays, so I did two polls to choose Snowdrop's birthday, and June 8th won.

And since Father's Day in the US typically falls on the third Sunday...

Now, I did do some actual calculations for the conception date to verify the legitimacy of this premise... and technically, Snowdrop should be born at the end of May, but since I want it to fit with him being conceived on Zayne's birthday while also being born on June 8th, this means (lowkey spoilers alert lmao) Snowdrop has to be born after the actual due date by a little over a week. MC's gonna be overdue I'm sorry, my girl, we're going to need Zayne to induce her and fuck her into labor 😔

And since my brain is always moving, of course, the other week I finally had another revelation and realized Father's Day would be just a week after Snowdrop's birthday, hence.......... Zayne's first Father Day is celebrated just one week into fatherhood 🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺

Even if Snowdrop is a little overdue, he is still small. So small. Tiny, even, when held by Zayne. Zayne. 6'1"/186cm tall Zayne with this tiny baby he had created with the love of his life while brat taming her on his birthday during a sex marathon.

And he is extra careful, because the baby is still so fragile and helpless. He's supporting the neck, holding the baby easily with one hand and he's just full of love and awe and gratitude as he admires his sleepy son, his heart feeling so full, just overflowing with love every time he sees the baby scrunches his nose or letting out a wide yawn.

And this all still feels so surreal, because to him, just a week ago, this baby was still in his wife's belly, but now his son is here and in his arms and they're celebrating him being a father? Unreal.

Also knowing this baby was conceived on his birthday? A special secret only he and his wife know about? He's on cloud nine.

Additional notes: in my head, Zayne still hasn't had a proper haircut in a while, so imagine him with a type of wolf cut 'do. And he's also only wearing gray joggers around the house. Because... there's a June heatwave and I, as the writer, want him shirtless. <333

and can we just appreciate that June 8th this year is also the first day for Caleb's birthday banner lmaooooooo

#x — 💌#anonymous #lads bbs.txt #snowdrop.txt #have i gotten too heavily invested with the details of this universe?#perchance #and of course i can't just write only zayne #i need to write the other dads too out of fairness #while also writing two caleb bday fics #i might've shot myself in the foot but fuck it we ball #ദ്ദി(ㅠ﹏ㅠ)

30 notes · View notes

theguarddogofallyourfeverdreams · 5 months ago

Text

what the gang would smell like and perfumes | bh6 headcanons

tadashi hamada

fresh, soft and clean laundry, coffee beans being ground and brewed into hot coffee, vanilla and cinnamon as freshly handmade pastries are being popped in and out of the oven. walking into a warm cafe-bakery at early morning on a chilly, foggy winter day in which breathing produces vapor and the sky is still somewhat dark and you are instantly enveloped in that warmth and sweetness. the moment you open the door to the cafe a bell jingles, announcing another customer's entrance sweetly. people are already visiting the cafe and exchanging friendly and kind 'good morning's, cups of coffee in their hands. a comforting hug overflowing with coziness a la teddy bears and baymax.

what else do i have to say? guys and girls want him. so nice and kind to everybody it's unreal-- definitely to a fault sometimes. even on days that he isn't donning any fragrance he is complimented by anybody who gets close enough to him to smell the atmosphere of the lucky cat cafe on his signature cardigans. he has to tell the person that he's not wearing anything when they ask, but hey, he gets to plug his aunt's cafe. though not to the extent of wasabi, tadashi is definitely conscious of his smell and cleanliness and takes measures not to be stinky (LOL). doesn't prefer any "gender" of perfume, just needs to be comforting, clean and inoffensive. sometimes lends hiro his clothes and cologne. perfumes: maison margiela's lazy sunday morning / coffee break, diptyque's tam dao, jo malone's wood sage & sea salt, penhaligon's endymion

hiro hamada

much like his older brother, he smells like the Lucky Cat Cafe since they literally live above the place and the two of them have to open and close for Aunt Cass on days it's busy and on beat poetry nights. except he's an adolescent young male going through puberty so let's face it: there's going to be times where he smells less than ideal. that doesn't mean he doesn't shower everyday or isn't careful about personal hygiene, it's just teenage boy smell, hormones and shit. sometimes for important events he might ask tadashi to borrow his fragrances, which is convenient because all of them are clean, inoffensive, and somewhat proper. perfumes: giorgio armani's acqua di gio [AN//every teen boy has this as one of their starters don't fight me on this], maison margiela's bubble bath, clean's warm cotton [AN// this one was so hard to do because i keep having to get rid of the teenage boy smell stereotype and lock tf in]

gogo tomago

laconic, brutal, grungy, bold and rough, all with sarcastic charm: 0 to 60 to maxing out the speedometer in the blink of an eye, the leather interior of a race car, the burning of tires on a race track, engine of the car roaring as the exhaust pipe spits out smoke and flames, leather racing gloves, the dangerous and exhilarating chase for a high fueled by speed and adrenaline, all on top of refreshing woody citrusy notes from her own cologne: citrus, eucalyptus, vetiver and cedarwood

girls love her, guys want to be her. would make great friends with haruka tenoh. though gogo seems like she would prefer not to be worried with dainty little things like perfume, she actually cares to smell clean so she does reach for a bottle of fragrance sometimes. she wouldn't be opposed to wearing mens' cologne; actually, sometimes prefers to wear "masculine" over "feminine" scents and has attracted many a lady's attention. works on her own cars and bikes after finishing up on the race track on the weekend, sometimes ending up smelling like car engine oil, metal, and grime; this only adds to her gritty, edgy and rough charm as an accomplished racer engineer and mechanic.

perfume: guy laroche's drakkar noir, tom ford's ombre leather, jo malone's lime basil&mandarin, penhaligon's sports car club (so on brand!)

honey lemon

polaroids and flashes of digital cameras, eccentric but elegant statement pieces, a caramel latte with a few drizzles of honey next to a cute, bubbly pink vegan-leather purse atop a dressing room table, a nearby cabinet filled with innumerable bottles of perfume and cosmetics made by upscale luxury cosmetics houses. the dressing room smells like rose and various herbs from a bouquet of roses and a nearby reed diffuser. sugar spice and everything nice, just the swaying of her long hair as she walks gives passersby a whiff of an elegant and bubbly mix of vanilla, rose, jasmine, honey (and lemon lol) gourmand/floral girlie...she definitely gets compliments about her scent on the daily. girls can't decide if they want to be her or be with her. the type of girlie to be stopped on the street by strangers asking for the perfume she's wearing. she definitely does modeling part time and uses and smells like Oribe shampoo. people close their eyes and visualize flowers like in those slice-of-anime moments when they she walks by. mentioned to have a passion for sustainability and protecting the environment, so i assume she also does a little gardening from time to time and maybe even maintains her own bush of roses, grooming and clipping them to put in her room or to make rose water. probably also makes her own lipbalms and candles. never caught stinky; the grossest she ever gets is like after her typical daily "chemical metal embrittlement!" but she makes sure to wash up and refresh before her next class. definitely carries mints, fabric refreshers, candies, scented hand sanitizers and even throat lozenges in her purse. perfume: chloe's chloe EDP, diptyque's eau rose, lancome's la vie este belle, jo malone's nectarine blossom&honey (...lemon, LOL), dior's miss dior absolutely blooming

wasabi

clean and sterile almost at the microscopic level. in a way reminiscent of hospitals and operating rooms' pristine, clean, and precise instruments, ft. cleaning agents, hand sanitizers, disinfectants, etc. not in a bad way, just in wasabi's special neatnik charm. clean fabrics, spotless working space, instruments, stationery and pencils neatly organized in a box atop the space, an air purifier exactly 3 meters away, citrus airwick plugged into an outlet 5 meters away, a cup of coffee neatly placed exactly 1 meter away from a pristine laptop. lemon, bergamot, iris, and sandalwood.

the first time we meet wasabi in the movie he literally pulls out an entire cabinet with outlines for a place for every one of his tools and instruments like dude's literally a stereotypical neat freak and germaphobe what else do i have to say?? very conscious of not only the environmental cleanliness but of his own as well. probably the typa guy to ask people if they smell bad after eating like bbq or just really pungent food in general. then if they say "yeah you kinda smell like grilled meat but it's not that bad or noticeable you kinda have to get close--" he sighs and pulls out a fabric refresher from his pocket and sprays himself like 10 times. the only times he gets caught smelling anything other than clean really

perfume: byredo's gypsy water, prada's l'homme, diptyque's eau de minthe, etat libre d'orange's you or someone like you

fred

im ngl normally he does not smell the best. he literally said it himself, "I go front, i go back, i go inside out, then i go front and back" i don't think that gives any room for any pleasant smell. at most some deodorant and axe body spray. assuming he did shower.

he does clean up and present himself quite nicely when asked to by his parents-- he has to anyway, considering his family background is upper class and that alone is inextricable from upper class gatherings, all of which require pristine and conservative grooming and dressing up. when he does lock the fuck in, he's almost an entirely different person. tailored suit, slick hairdo, polished and shined oxfords, a watch that's unassuming but costs more than the entire gang's one year of tuition combined...

perfumes (when he actually locks in): penhaligon's the blazing mr sam / opus 1870, creed's green irish tweed

[A/N I know i said hiro's was hard but omfg i had to lock in so hard for this guy this guy doesn't do anything for himself against stinky allegations like "I go front, i go back, i go inside out, then i go front and back" WHAT??? HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO DEFEND HIM??????]

bonus: baymax

vinyl and metal...what did you expect? perfume: wd-40

[A/N fred and hiro were too hard to imagine so i couldn't write a detailed description for them, but if you have any hcs for them feel free to comment]

#tadashi hamada #hiro hamada #gogo tomago #honey lemon #wasabi no ginger #fred frederickson iv #baymax #big hero 6 #big hero six #big hero 6 the series #big hero 6 headcanons #character headcanons #bh6 #bh6 hiro #bh6 the series #bh6 wasabi

50 notes · View notes

alltflyter · 1 month ago

Text

Goddd I really don't know how people manage to be functioning adult alone I really don't. It's all so much easier when you can help each other and rely on each other and pick up for the each other when one is down. Of course it hardly helps that I am down so much more than I used to be, either, but nonetheless.

#okkllllkkkkklkk that concludes the daily lamentation for real this time. peace #1. everything real exists 2. nothing unreal exists 3. the sun is new every day #4. the bow and the lyre 5. the last drop which causes the cup to overflow 6. the upward going spiral #7. we step and do not step into the same river we are and are not #urlalltflyter

5 notes · View notes

namelesskn1ght · 17 days ago

Text

The warmth of your skin.

TFO B-127 x Reader Content: established relationship, minor anguish, valveplug. 🔞

A/N: Well, this is the first time I’ve published a fic, and I’m a little nervous about it. English isn’t my native language. I’ve done my best to translate this; I hope everything is spelled correctly, even though I don’t think so because the spell checker on my phone hates me for some reason.

Under the resplendent and sublime light of the moon, he tries to reach you with you are getting lost into the distance, laughing happily, while the sea breeze moistens his worn golden armor for staying so close to the shore. Frustration overwhelms him at not being able to keep up with you; being more similar to your size, you turn out to be much more agile and faster than him.

Despite the difficulties, him still trying to catch up with you.

Focuses on your voice to relieve frustration. Listening to you relieves any restlessness, but it also makes his spark feel confusing things. Now just spreading your overflowing happiness to him. Laughing genuinely with you.

From one moment to the next your rhythm falters and it is an opportunity. Stretching the servo to reach your hand, you turn suddenly. Dazzled by the view he has of you. Looking almost unreal how ethereal you look under the focus of the moon.

He takes you in his servos, feeling a little guilty as he triumphantly tells you he has you; when you just slowed down because his speed was almost comparable to that of an overweight puppy.

He leans his body forward, dragging you with him. He murmurs sweet words to you as his servos descend almost pleasurably from your abdomen to your thighs, placing a soft kiss on your shoulder. You lose yourself in his touch, gasping in surprise as he picks you up. You come across those beautiful blue optics. Standing out from everything else in the darkness.

He gently brings the front of his helmet up to your forehead, depositing a kiss there when he raises his head. Feeling your hands slide gently down his chassis to his neck. A pure feeling of happiness runs through him. Laughing softly, imagine a melody. He hums to himself, moving smoothly and almost gracefully, imagining that he is dancing a waltz with you.

Watching your face change from confusion to a tender emotion when you understand what he does. Listening to your nervous laughter. Taking a turn, leans his body, shortening all distance with you, gently releasing the grip on your thighs so that your feet touch the wet sand and the water. Bringing his servo closer to your waist. His lips too close to yours, he hears you murmur ‘how sweet’ but is suffocated by the feeling of closeness. Not yet used to touching you this way. Their internal systems becoming louder and their fans turning on.

His posture falters, bending down to drag you with him into the water. Almost caging you with his body, with part of his weight on you. Panicking as you hit his frame and start coughing underwater, quickly getting up, he grabs both of your arms and roughly lifts you out of the water. He carries you in his servos, noticing how you cough water on him. Coming further along the shore to sit on the sand, lying on his lap, approaching his chassis while you rest your head on its neck.

Snuggling up against him in search of heat, you hear his apologies. You put a hand over his mouth. “It’s okay, it’s not your fault.” you try to assure him in a tired tone, but he still keeps talking to you with your hand on him. You lower your hand to his shoulder, letting him speak. His frame radiates such comforting warmth that your eyelids feel heavy. The sound of the sea and nature are a great comfort after not having seen the outside in a long time. You try to enjoy it, enjoy it with him.

“It feels good to be in this place.” you say with that sleepy tone so particular to you when you are about to fall asleep. “I would love to be able to stay here forever.”

He laughs softly. “I’m glad you like this place.” one day while patrolling he found that beach isolated and lonely. He thought it would be a good place to bring you for a change of scenery. So you can be calm for a while.

“I hope we can come back soon, it’s so peaceful and pleasant.”

There’s something about the way you say it that hurts him. He knows you're unhappy even if you don’t tell him, but he feels it. Unhappy to spend most of your days on the ark. Isolated in his room all the time. He knows you miss the outside, but since you got too involved in his life, you are inevitably in the sights of the Decepticons.

He doesn’t want the Decepticons to find you again. To hurt you again.

But he won’t make the same mistake again, ever. Not while the spark still burns within him.

What is that expression? you sit up a little, touching the side of his face. He seems absent. “Honey, are you okay?” you ask subtly, gently moving his head so he looks at you. “Bee?”

He wonders if you would be happier if you had never met him. Inevitably remembering those times where he tormented himself for the war on Cybertron, blaming himself for it.

If only I had never created Steve, maybe things would be different. Perhaps he would never have come to Earth and brought his war to your beautiful planet.

Maybe, you would be with another human instead of him.

That last thought twists disgustingly in his processor, bothering him at the idea of someone else having you.

You belong to him as much as he belongs to you. You are his, to cherish and protect.

He will make you happy until the end of his days.

His expression turns into something you’re not sure you can read, softness and anger might be a small possibility. Opening your mouth slightly he muffles your question when his lips crash into yours, his glossa entering your mouth. With one servo firmly on your nape and the other wandering under your wet shirt. Surprised by that passionate kiss and the way he touched you, but not complaining at all.

“I’ll try to bring you here as often as you want,” he tries to say, kissing you eagerly. “Anywhere you want.”

Soft hands on his face. He lays you down slowly on the sand while still kissing you, cradling his hips against yours. Your legs hugging his waist. Feeling his spike twist behind his frame. Needing this, needing you to drown out those bad thoughts that torment him.

He’s trying, he’s doing the best he can, please don’t get tired of him.

“Bee, honey, calm down, I’m not going anywhere.” You try to say in a mocking tone. Because your friendly, sweet robot acting so anxious and hungry is a very charming oddity.

He shortens the kiss, placing soft, eager kisses until he reaches your ear. With its heavy relief giving you chills. “Can I… Can I?” and your sweet robot is still there. You stifle a laugh, because no matter how needy he is, he’s always going to ask you before he goes too far. Always worrying about you. You try to take off your pants, being somewhat complicated with him on top of you, with him marking your sensitive neck.

Getting it to slide down along with your underwear, he tears it off with a desperation that makes you laugh. Drowning your laughter when he lines up and sheathes you tightly.

You’re so tight when you arch against him. Servos hold your hips tightly as he tries to maintain control by being inside you, not to be too rough with you. Slow but hard thrusts. The obscene sound of your moans and your wet skin crashing his frame further fueling that scorching heat in him. Finally sinking those thoughts deep into his processor as he melts in the warmth of your skin and your moist heat.

The pain of the stretching is soothed by the pleasure of his hard thrusts. Listening to him mutter on and on, many things drowned out by his own moans and grunts, how little you hear how much he loves you, that you are his forever. Without paying much attention to what he says because of the fog of pleasure that clouds your judgment. Holding onto him as he begins to thrust frantically, feeling him take you to the limit without mercy.

He feels you tremble against him, feeling you milk his spike. His release coming when you moan his name so many times it drives him over the edge. Filling you to the brim as he pumps shakily.

He gently pulls away from you, moaning softly as he pulls out of your warmth, watching his excess escape from you. Beautiful.

Exhausted, you notice how he turns you around, feeling its length caress you until it aligns again. Opening your eyes heavily you try to look back, watching him cage you with his much bigger body, holding both of your hands as he begins to thrust. “We still have time before we come back, my love.”

#transformers x reader #b 127 x reader #b 127 #valveplug

36 notes · View notes

earthtoharlow · 9 months ago

Text

Don’t Like The Lights

Sequel to Flashing Lights series, must read Flashing Lights first to understand

Series Masterlist

17. Juno

If you love me right, then who knows? I might let you make me Juno. You know I just might let you lock me down tonight. One of me is cute, but two three though?

Maryse woke up groggy from a deep nap, still exhausted from giving birth. Her body felt heavy, and the hospital room was quiet, the soft hum of machinery filling the background. For a moment, everything felt serene—until she glanced over at the bassinet.

It was empty.

Her heart skipped a beat, panic rushing through her as she tried to sit up. “Where are they?” she gasped, looking around frantically.

Just as she was about to call out, she noticed Jack near the window, cradling both babies in his arms. He was gently swaying back and forth, staring out at the skyline, completely absorbed in the moment. She sighed in relief, her heart calming down.

“Hey,” she whispered, still a little shaken but smiling now.

Jack turned at the sound of her voice, his face lighting up when he saw she was awake. He walked over slowly, his eyes soft as he carefully held Noah and London, one in each arm.

“They’re right here, baby,” he murmured, leaning down so she could see their tiny faces nestled against his chest. “Just couldn’t let them out of my sight.”

Maryse smiled, wiping a tear from her eye. “You scared me for a second.”

“Sorry,” he whispered, gently placing the twins in the bassinet beside her bed before sitting down next to her. “I just… I can’t stop looking at them. It’s like I’m afraid they’re not real.”

She leaned her head against his shoulder, still watching the babies as they slept. “They’re real, and they’re perfect.”

He kissed the top of her head. “Yeah, they are. And you did an amazing job. I’m so proud of you.”

“Well,” she said, closing her eyes again, feeling safe, “we did this together.”

After spending almost a week in the hospital, Maryse was finally given the okay to leave. When they pulled into the driveway and got home from the hospital, it felt like they were stepping into a new world. Maryse and Jack had spent what felt like a lifetime in that hospital, learning how to adjust to having two babies at once, but now it was real. There were no nurses to help, no one to answer their questions with ease—just them and their newborn twins.

The twins, Noah and London, were already a week old, and every day, they seemed to look more alike. As Maryse gently carried London inside, Jack followed behind, balancing Noah in one arm and an overflowing diaper bag in the other.

“I can’t believe we made it,” Jack said, looking exhausted but smiling as they stepped into the living room. He kicked the door shut behind him and sighed. “This feels so… unreal.”

Maryse, equally tired, gave him a look as she lowered London into the bassinet. “Unreal? More like overwhelming,” she muttered with a tired laugh, brushing her hair back. “I still don’t know how we’re supposed to do this… every day.”

Jack set Noah down next to London, his eyes fixed on how alike they were becoming. “They really are starting to look more and more like each other,” he said, almost in disbelief. “I mean, one day, Noah’s got your nose and London’s got mine… the next day, it’s like they’re just copying each other.”

Maryse stood next to him, leaning against him slightly for support. “Yeah, I’ve noticed that. It’s kinda crazy, right?” She stared down at their twins, her heart swelling with love, even though the exhaustion was nearly unbearable.

Jack wrapped an arm around her, pulling her in close. “We’re gonna figure it out,” he said softly. “One day at a time, yeah?”

She nodded, resting her head against his shoulder, eyes on the twins. “One day at a time,” she echoed, taking a deep breath. Even though it felt like the hardest thing they’d ever done, she couldn’t deny how much love filled the room.

This was their new reality now—two babies, no sleep, and somehow loving each other through the chaos.

Things were easy for a few hours as the babies slept but it didn’t take long for the reality of being on their own with the twins to set in. They made a firm decision—no visitors for the first month. Both of their families had wanted to see the babies, but Maryse and Jack agreed they needed time to adjust on their own.

“We appreciate the help, mom but we want to do this by ourselves for a little while,” Maryse had said on the phone, trying to keep the exhaustion out of her voice.

Jack nodded in agreement beside her, adding, “We’ll let you all know when we’re ready. But for now, we got this.”

That resolve, however, felt tested almost immediately when they realized they were really on their own. It was their first night without family or nurses helping out, and it showed. Both were running on no sleep and faced the task of changing diapers for the first time without any backup.

“Alright, who’s up first?” Jack asked, looking between Noah and London as they lay in their cribs. Both babies had started squirming, and Maryse just groaned, her body sore and her brain foggy.

“I’ll take London,” she muttered, stifling a yawn. She lifted her daughter and placed her on the changing table, already feeling overwhelmed by how tiny and fragile she was. “Okay, here we go,” she whispered, fumbling with the diaper tabs.

Meanwhile, Jack was already getting to work on Noah’s diaper with surprising confidence. “It’s all about speed, babe,” he said, smoothly undoing the diaper with one hand and grabbing wipes with the other.

Maryse shot him a look, wide-eyed. “How are you doing that so fast?”

He grinned. “I pay attention. You know, just naturally gifted,” he said with a wink, expertly finishing up.

“Show-off,” Maryse muttered, wrestling with London’s wiggling legs and trying not to panic. “How do people make this look so easy?”

Jack sauntered over, clearly feeling proud of himself. “You just gotta make sure the tabs are tight,” he said, gently adjusting London’s diaper. “Otherwise, you’ll be dealing with a blowout later. Trust me.”

Maryse exhaled in relief. “Fine. You can be the diaper expert. I’ll stick to making bottles.”

Jack chuckled as he scooped up Noah and settled him in the crib. “Deal. I got the dirty work.”

When it came time to make bottles, though, it became clear that Jack wasn’t as confident in that department. He stood in the kitchen, reading the formula instructions like they were written in another language. “Why are these directions so complicated?”

Maryse walked over, smirking. “It’s literally just mix and shake,” she said, laughing as she wiped down the formula powder he’d spilled all over the counter. “Here, give me that.”

She grabbed the bottle he was struggling with and quickly screwed the top on properly. “You didn’t even twist it all the way. You can’t rush it, or it’ll leak everywhere.”

Jack watched her in awe. “How do you make that look so easy?”

Maryse smirked as she handed him the properly made bottle. “Natural talent,” she teased, throwing his earlier words back at him.

He laughed, shaking his head. “Touché. Alright, so you’re the bottle master, and I’ll handle diapers.”

Maryse smiled, glad they were finding some balance in the chaos. “Deal. As long as we don’t switch.”

“You sure you don’t wanna try diapers again?” he teased, nudging her gently.

She shot him a mock-serious look. “Not a chance. I’d rather not risk a disaster tonight. Let’s just stick to what we’re good at.”

***

They had been home for 3 weeks and during the end of Maryse’s pregnancy, Jack had told his team that he would be taking an unofficial paternity leave. While he got into the routine of being a dad, things behind the scenes were crazier than ever.

He had announced his plans to host a music festival in Kentucky a few months back, and now that the twins were here, the calls from his team had started flooding in. Every time his phone rang, Maryse noticed how he would glance at it, frown, and then silence the call, turning his attention back to the babies.

At first, she didn’t say anything. She knew how important it was to him to be there, fully present as they adjusted to being new parents. But after a few days, she could tell something was on his mind. He’d get up in the middle of the night to feed Noah or rock London to sleep, but his eyes seemed distant, and he was quieter than usual.

One afternoon, as they were both sitting on the couch, Noah napping on Jack’s chest while London dozed off in Maryse arms, she finally brought it up.

“You’ve been getting a lot of calls lately,” she said gently, watching his face.

He didn’t look up right away, just kept stroking Noah’s tiny back. “Yeah… It’s about the festival.”

“I figured.” She paused, looking at him. “You’ve been ignoring them.”

He sighed, leaning his head back against the couch. “Yeah. I have.”

“Jack, you don’t have to do that,” she said softly. “I know how much this festival means to you.”

“It does,” he admitted, “but… this means more.” He gestured at Noah, still asleep on his chest, and London, snug in her arms. “I don’t want to miss any of this.”

“I get that,” she said, her voice soft. “But I also know you. You’ve been working on this festival for months. You don’t have to choose between being here with us and making sure the festival’s a success.”

He finally looked at her, a bit of hesitation in his eyes. “I just feel like if I start taking those calls, I’ll get sucked back into work, and I won’t be as present. I don’t want to miss anything with the twins.”

Maryse shifted London slightly and reached over, placing her hand on his knee. “You’re not going to miss anything. You’ve been here every step of the way, Jack. And the truth is, you’re going to have to find a balance eventually. We both are.”

He let out a deep breath, running a hand through his hair. “I know. It’s just… I don’t know how to do that yet. I don’t want to let anyone down—especially not you and the babies.”

“You won’t,” she reassured him. “But I think it’ll help if you let your team handle some things, or even take a few of those calls. You’ve got people you trust, right?”

He nodded. “Yeah… I do.”

“Then lean on them. You don’t have to do everything by yourself,” she said. “Besides, it’s Kentucky. It’s your festival. I know how important that is to you, and I don’t want you to feel like you’re letting that go.”

He looked down at Noah, his hand gently rubbing his son’s back. “You’re right,” he said quietly. “I just… I didn’t realize how hard it would be to juggle all this.”

“We’re figuring it out together,” she said with a soft smile. “But we’re a team. And if the calls are stressing you out, it’s okay to handle some business. Just don’t forget to come back to us when you’re done.”

Jack nodded, his expression softening as he leaned down to kiss Noah’s tiny head. “You always know how to talk me down.”

Maryse chuckled. “That’s because I know you. You can handle this, Jack. Just don’t shut everything out. You can have both—a family and your career.”

He smiled at her, his eyes warm with affection. “I don’t deserve you, you know that?”

Maryse just laughed. “Well, you’re stuck with me now, so you’ll have to deal with it.”

He leaned back slightly, teasing, “Yeah, for the next 18 years at least.”

She shot him a playful glare. “If I wasn’t holding London, I would smack you right now.”

He laughed, glancing down at Noah on his chest, then at London nestled in her arms. “Good thing you’re outnumbered.”

“Outnumbered or not, don’t push your luck, Jack,” she teased with a smile.

He raised his hands in mock surrender. “Alright, alright. We can tussle later but let’s put these rugrats to bed so we can relax for a little.”

“Don’t call my babies rugrats!” Maryse said standing and walking towards the stairs to their nursery.

After what felt like an eternity, they finally got the babies to sleep. Maryse slumped back on the couch, too exhausted to even think about moving to the bedroom. Her curls were thrown up in a messy bun, and she knew she probably looked like she’d been through a tornado. She didn’t care though, not right now. All she wanted was to close her eyes for just a minute.

Jack walked into the room quietly, a small smile tugging at his lips when he saw her. She gave him a tired glance, noticing that he had something behind his back.

“What are you hiding?” she asked, her voice low with fatigue.

He shifted, a bit sheepish. “Okay, so… I’ve been meaning to give you this for a while, but things have been… you know, crazy.” He stepped forward and brought out a small velvet box from behind his back. “It’s your push gift. Sorry it’s a little late… almost a month now, but I didn’t forget.”

Her tired eyes widened a little as she sat up straighter. “Jack, you didn’t have to—”

“I wanted to,” he cut her off gently, sitting beside her and handing her the box. “After everything you’ve done… everything you’ve been through. You deserve more than this, honestly.”

She opened the box slowly, her heart racing a little despite her exhaustion. Inside was a delicate necklace, a simple gold chain with two tiny charms: an “L” and an “N.” Tears pricked her eyes as she traced the letters with her fingers.

“It’s for London and Noah,” he said quietly. “I thought it’d be nice to have something that’s always with you.”

She looked up at him, her eyes shining. “Jack… this is perfect. I love it.”

He smiled, leaning in to kiss her forehead. “You’ve been incredible through all of this. I don’t know how you do it. And I’m sorry it took me so long to give this to you.”

She shook her head, her voice soft. “Don’t apologize. This is… everything.”

They sat in silence for a moment, the weight of the last few weeks hanging between them. She leaned against him, and he wrapped an arm around her.

Jack then stood up from the couch, stretching his arms like he was preparing for something big. Maryse raised an eyebrow, barely awake, but curious.

“What are you doing?” she asked, a tired smile creeping onto her face.

Without answering, he scooped her up in a fireman’s carry, slinging her over his shoulder. She gasped in surprise, quickly covering her mouth to stifle the laugh that threatened to burst out. The last thing they needed was for the twins to wake up after all the effort it took to put them down.

“Jack, put me down! You’re gonna wake them up!” she whispered through her giggles, trying not to be too loud as she half-heartedly swatted at his back.

He grinned and kept walking toward the bedroom. “You deserve some real sleep,” he whispered back, “and I’m making sure you get it.”

As they passed the nursery door, she peeked out from behind her hands, still laughing softly. “If they wake up, it’s your fault,” she muttered, but her voice was full of warmth.

He carefully lowered her onto the bed once they reached the bedroom, gently tucking her into the covers. “You needed that laugh,” he said, leaning down to kiss her forehead.

She smiled up at him, her heart swelling with love. “Thanks for always making me laugh… even when I’m exhausted.”

He grinned. “Anytime.”

With that, he climbed into bed next to her, wrapping his arms around her. For the first time in what felt like forever, they both drifted off into a deep, peaceful sleep, knowing they had each other to lean on.

***

AN: just a little filler chapter 🤭

Tag List

(message me if you'd like to be added or removed)

*recently made a new tag list so if your name is missing please let me know*

@harlowsbby @heavyhitterheaux @harlowcomehome @https-harlow @hoodharlow @gazeboharlow @jackmans-poison @itsyagirljaz @cosypinky2 @theyoganarrative @ann2sno @bugheadfanatic @umicornlove @venic-bxtch @muli-wam @jackharlow502 @slutzzz4jack @aga21 @iknowdatsrightbih @theboujeestofboujee @babygirl-htx @chantelaustingunn @wabi-sabi1090 @dstark-0706 @kkrenae @hufflewhore128 @jackiehollanderr @katiaw2

#jack harlow #jack harlow x reader #jack harlow x y/n #jack harlow reader #jack harlow x oc #flashing lights #jack harlow fluff #jack harlow fanfic

93 notes · View notes

kinzis-writing · 2 years ago

Text

Last Christmas | Rafe Cameron

Kinzi's 25 Days of Christmas: Blogmas day 3

Summary: It's Christmas in Outer Banks, the holiday where you got to spend time with your friends. It's hard to enjoy the holiday when your mind goes back to last Christmas and who you were spending it with.

Pairing: Rafe Cameron x Reader

Warning(s): a few cuss words, hints at ward cameron being a unaliver, mentions of breakup, soft! rafe.

Disclaimer: in this imagine Rafe did NOT kill peterkin and he’s not psycho. He’s a normal boy who just needed some extra love. So in this imagine Ward will be the villain 100% and Rafe 0% (besides breaking up)

*Gif not mine* *Not proofread or edited!*

*Christmas Eve - OBX*

It had been 11 months since you had been in Outer Banks, your breakup with your ex-boyfriend had been too hard on you to stay. After that you felt the need to leave Outer Banks and your family had finally convinced you to come back and spend the holidays with them. You knew that they would try to convince you to stay and not go back to living with your aunt on the mainland, however, you were unsure if that would be the best choice.

"Y/N!" Sarah shouted as she ran to hug you. The big house your family parked outside of looked familiar, but no longer felt like home. It wasn't what you were used too, or maybe it was what was no longer with you. "I am so glad your back, we've missed you around here." she stated pulling away from the hug.

You were like Sarah, born a kook but turned into a pogue. The only difference is that your family did not make a difference between the kooks and pogues. There had been many times when your family had fed the pogues or gave them a place to stay when they needed it. Your family was very understanding, and you appreciated every little thing they did for your friends.

"Only back for the holidays." Y/N told her as the two headed into the big house that she used to call home. The girl's quickly made their way up to the room that was her’s so they could get Y/N settled in. “It feels unreal, being back in this bedroom.” She muttered memories of her and her ex flooded her mind. No one knew Rafe Cameron the way that Y/N. While he was trouble, most of the time, he was caring around her. Well, she thought so anyways.

Sarah gave the girl a small smile, “there’s a party, John B decided to have a Christmas celebration.” The Cameron girl spoke. “Your parents allowed them to use your guest house, out back…” she trailed off. Knowing that the idea of a party would make the girl nervous.

“Why would they do that?” Y/N asked going through her clothes knowing she’d be dragged to this party regardless of what she wanted.

Sarah shrugged, “John B said it was a “get together” type thing and you know how your family is about welcome home celebrations.” She explained watching the girl shuffle through the clothes that she was putting away. “You’re just back for the holidays, remember? Let’s make the most of it with our friends.”

🎄

By 10 that night the party was on, the guest house behind Y/N’s house was overflowing with guests who had greeted the girl back with open arms. She had showed up an hour late, due to worrying about what to wear, how to do her hair and makeup, and stalling in hopes of not seeing him.

“Y/N, the life of the party decided to come back to us!” JJ Maybank yelled over the music as the girl joined the pogues in the den. “Y/N, you know my girlfriend Kiara, right?” He asked smuggled.

Y/N’s eyes widen in shock, “really, you two? When did that happen?” She asked surprised about her friends becoming lovers.

“Let’s just say that you’ve missed a lot.” Kiara spoke before pulling the girl into a bone crushing hug, “it’s good to see you again.”

“Likewise,” y/n spoke with a smile. “If you’ll excuse me, I don’t want to be rude so your guest of honor is going to go grab a drink.”

Y/N made her way through the crowd and into the cramped kitchen. She was pouring herself a drink and just thinking about her life. She had thought that being back made her feel out of place, that was until she was next to her friends then she felt at home.

“I’ll be damned,” a voice spoke from behind her as she slowly stopped pouring her drink. “I honestly didn’t think I’d see you again.” The voice of her former friend continued.

Y/N sat her cup on the kitchen counter and turned around to face the man behind her. “Kelce,” she greeted with a smile. “It’s good to see you.” She added as she stepped forward and pulled the man into a hug.

“It’s great to see you.” He replied as they pulled away. He glanced around the kitchen before looking back at her. “Have you seen him since you’ve been back?” He asked carefully unsure of how the the girl would reply.

Y/N shook her head as she turned around the grab her drink, “I was hoping to avoid him.” She mumbled before taking a sip of the drink. “It hurt, bad.” She shrugged thinking back to last Christmas and how close they were. “I had to get out and I don’t plan on ever coming back permanently.” She spoke the truth. At this current time, she had no plans of staying in outer banks.

Kelce gave her a sad smile, “I know Rafe puts on a facade, but that doesn’t mean that he didn’t hurt too.” The man told his best friend’s ex. He knew that the two of them were inseparable and truth be told, Rafe didn’t tell anyone as to why they broke up.

Y/N rolled her eyes at the man in front of her before playing with her fingers. “Maybe but-” she cut herself when she looked around kelce and locked eyes with the one man that she planned to avoid. “I have to go.” She mumbled after looking away from Rafe. She walked around kelce and made her way back to the pogues.

It was going to be a long night and she knew it.

The party had been going on for a few hours and everyone was either drunk, passed out, making out, or playing games. Y/N had only had two drinks, making her pretty much sober because she didn’t trust herself if she was to get drunk. No matter where she went tonight she felt as if Rafe was following her or he knew her next step. She had locked eyes with him many times tonight and each time it got her heart racing, her hands sweaty, and made her nervous.

She didn’t understand why he still made her feel that way. After all, she was over him! Or was she? “Hey guys,” Y/N called as she walked over to the pogues. “Thank you guys for this Christmas slash welcome back party, but I’m super tired so I think I’m gonna walk back over and head to bed.” She told them. She gave them all hugs and said good night before leaving the guest house and heading back over to her house.

She was beyond excited to be able to go to sleep. Her parents were going on their houseboat tonight with some friends, so she’d have the house to herself and could relax all she needed. She knew that in order to face tomorrow and the days to come that she would need to get herself together.

“Did you honestly think you wouldn’t run into him at some point?” She asked herself in her head. She knew that she would at least see him, but she was hoping that he wouldn’t see her back or that she could avoid him.

Y/N pushed open her bedroom door while unzipping her dress. She was beyond ready to get out of that dress and get into comfortable clothes. “Holy shit!” She jumped when she moved her head up. Her hand instinctively went over her heart because of how fast it was beating.

Sitting in her desk chair beside her bed was Rafe Cameron. He didn’t have his usually cocky expression on his face, but a soft smile did form when he realized he had accidentally scared her. “I’m sorry,” his voice came out quietly and soft. “I didn’t mean to startle you.”

Y/N scoffed eyeing the man in front of her, “you didn’t mean to startle me? Why are you in my room?”

“I wanted to talk and I knew you’d run at the party.” Rafe shrugged as he pushed himself up from the desk chair.

“You lost the privilege to come over unannounced when you broke it off last year.” Y/N told him as she felt her chest get heavy at the thought of how things ended. She would’ve done anything for Rafe and everyone knew it, so whenever he broke it off… it was a shock.

“You never let me explain,” Rafe started as he walked a bit closer, but Y/N just scooted back not wanting him to get close. Mainly because she was afraid she’d give in. “A lot happened after you left and some of it is still going on.”

“Maybe it has, but Sarah also told me about your new girlfriend.” Y/N replied seeing his eyes darkened for a moment before he let out a huff. “I was obviously the problem with something going on in your head.”

Y/N knew that Rafe had anxiety and depression. she also knew that he was yearning to make his father proud because Sarah was their favorite. She had been with him through everything and that’s why she didn’t understand why he left her.

Rafe ran a hand through his hair before taking another step closer causing Y/N’s back to hit the wall when she stepped away. “My father wanted me to do his dirty work and I was afraid that he would hurt you if I refused.” Rafe explained the girl that he loved, even if he never told her. “I broke it off so you would be safe and he couldn’t use you against me. The one Sarah told you about was a distraction I was with her to replace you and it never worked.”

Y/N could see the sincerity in his eyes as he spoke about his father and his ex girlfriend. “I loved you, Rafe. I would’ve done anything for you and you know it!” She spoke her voice coming out in a whisper.

“I know that, baby.” Rafe spoke back equally as quiet. “Which is why I broke it off, he was crazy and the things he wanted me to do… I needed you here and I needed you alive.” He took another step and that made him right in front of the girl that he had fallen in love with himself. “I’ve always loved you, Y/N. I never properly said it but I do.”

Y/N sucked in a breath, her emotions weighing down on her. He just admitted his true feelings, something that he never did when they were actually together. It was surreal hearing those words come out of his mouth, something that she had never expected. "Then why not try to get through it?" she asked the hurt in her voice showing. "Last Christmas was the last good memory we have, and we didn't even break up until New Years Day."

"If my dad didn't do what he did then we would still be together." Rafe promised.

Y/N's eyes teared up thinking about losing Rafe, she had been with other people and for some reason she had fallen head over heels in love with Rafe Cameron. She was slowly accepting the fact that she was still very much in love with the Cameron boy.

"When are you going to stop living to please your family?" She asked softly. "You are so much more than what your family thinks of you, who cares what they view you as. You deserve to be loved, Rafe. You need to believe that." she whispered softly so she wouldn't make his softness break.

Rafe's eye matched Y/Ns as both of them held tears threatening to fall. He knew that Y/N understood his situation and never once judged him for it. Making him know that she was definitely a keeper and the one for him. Without saying anything, he quickly slammed his lips to hers. Scared that she would reject the kiss if she thought about it too long. He knew his way around her overthinking, seeing as he had helped her with it many times.

Y/N did not object the way he thought she would, instead she yearned for him. She had wanted him since she left outer banks and she had wanted him when she locked eyes with him in her guest kitchen earlier. If he was willing to be with her, even just for the night, she was going to take it. Because at least for one moment, it can feel like the love they had Last Christmas was still alive.

Author's Note: So, I was originally going to base this imagine as "Last Christmas" by WHAM! Turns out I went a different direction and a part two will come out the next time I write for Rafe. I think that it's in a week or two, so if you enjoyed it, I hope you'll stay looking for that. I also feel like this could have been better and that it could have been smoother, but it is what it is. Also, sorry this is so late! I had the stomach virus (stomach flu) and I felt miserable and today is the only day I started feeling like myself and I have also finished all my finals so now I am back to full time writing, excluding my work shifts!

252 notes · View notes